You Must Think The Thing You Cannot Think

It’s fitting that one of the most important things you can do as a parent requires you to think about something that’s very nearly impossible for a parent to consider. It comes to us from Marcus Aurelius by way of Epictetus. As you kiss your son good night, says Epictetus, whisper to yourself, “He may be dead in the morning.” Don’t tempt fate, you say. By talking about a natural event? Is fate tempted when we speak of grain being reaped? No one wants to think about that. You want to think only good things about your kids. Damn these philosophers and their silly, academic exercises. Except that’s not what this is. Marcus wasn’t speaking flippantly. He lost nine children. Nine! Seneca, we gather, lost one early too. It should never happen, but it does. It heartbreakingly-world-wreckingly-nobody-deserves-it does. The point of thinking about this unthinkable thing is not morbidity. It has a purpose. A parent who faces the fact that they can lose a child at any moment is a parent who dares not waste a moment. A wise parent looks at the cruel world and says, “I know what you can do to my family in the future, but for the moment you’ve spared me. I will not take that for granted.” That’s what you must do—about your children, about your wealth, about peace in your nation, about the fair weather. It can all go away in a second. There’s nothing we can do about that. We can, however, drink in the present and be grateful for every waking moment. If you’re a parent looking to apply some ancient wisdom to one of the toughest jobs on the planet, you might try signing up for our email at DailyDad.com. Each morning, like DailyStoic.com, we send out an inspiring email designed to make you better, more present and more prepared. Join us now. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. 📢 Share | ⚙️ Manage Subscription

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:06Ryan Holiday?

  Welcome to The Daily Stoic, where each day we read a short passage designed to help you cultivate the strength, insight, wisdom necessary for living the good life. Each one of these passages is based on the 2,000-year-old philosophy that has guided some of history's greatest men and women. For more, you can visit us at dailystoic.com. "You must think the thing you cannot think." It's fitting that one of the most important things you could do as a parent would require you to think about a thing that's very nearly impossible for a parent to even consider. It comes to us from Marcus Aurelius by way of Epictetus. "As you kiss your son goodnight," says Epictetus, "whisper to yourself, he may be dead in

• 0:51Ryan Holiday?

  the morning." "Don't tempt fate," you say, "by talking about a natural event. Is fate tempted when we speak of grain being reaped?" No one wants to think this way. You want to think only good things about your kids. Damn these philosophers and their silly academic exercises. Except, that's not what this is. Marcus Aurelius wasn't speaking flippantly. He lost five children. Five. Seneca, we gathered, lost one early as well. It should never happen, but it does. It heartbreakingly, world-wreckingly, nobody deserves it does. The power of thinking about this unthinkable thing is not morbidity. It has a purpose.

• 1:35Ryan Holiday?

  A parent who faces the fact that they can lose a child at any moment is a parent who dares not waste a moment. A wise parent looks at the cruel world and says, "I know what you can do to my family in the future, but for the moment you have spared me, I will not take that for granted." That's what you must do about your children, about your wealth, about peace in your nation, about the fair weather. It can all go away in a second. There's nothing we can do about that. We can, however, drink in the present. If you're a parent looking to apply some ancient wisdom to one of the toughest jobs on the planet, you might try signing up for our email at DailyDad.com. Each morning, like the Daily Stoic, we send out an inspiring email designed to make you

• 2:20Ryan Holiday?

  better, more present, and more prepared. I hope you'll join us. We also have a podcast version of it, which you can check out. Just search Daily Dad on iTunes. Enjoy.