Ep 635 - Podcaster's Union (feat. Kevin Ryan & H. Foley)

Support the D. A. W. G. Z. @ patreon.com/MSsecretpod Support Kippy & Hank @ https://www.patreon.com/cw/AreYouGarbage WATCH their New Special 'American Garbage' THIS Sunday on their YouTube Go See Matt Live @ mattmccusker.com/dates Go See Shane Live @ shanemgillis.com Go See Lemaire Lee Live @ https://lemairelee.fun/ Go See Shawn Gardini Live if you want Seattle and Portland this wknd plz @ https://www.shawngardini.com/live y0o0o0o. Good mornin'. We got the AYG D. A. W. G. Z. in Cusky HQ for you this week. Not gonna lie ... it's a steaming hot cast from the jump. I was crackin' up haha. Check out their new special premiering on the YouTube this Sunday sept 13. Check out their pod too of course. Please enjoy. God Bless. Visit https://prizepicks.onelink.me/LME0/DRENCHED and use code DRENCHED and get $150 if you win your first $5 lineup! Watch the new season of Chad Powers Now Streaming on Hulu and Hulu on Disney+ For bundle subscribers. Terms apply. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Matt McCusker?

  Wow, wow, Wes.

• 0:02Speaker 01

  Look at the boys right here.

• 0:04Matt McCusker?

  We're here. Are you guys hot? Let me know if you're hot. I can turn down the air.

• 0:08Speaker 02

  No, I'm good. I love how right away you're like, it's on you. Go. Uh, no, I'm.

• 0:11Matt McCusker?

  Well, I'm just saying, cause it was cool in here, but I knew when we'd enter, we were like negative ice cubes.

• 0:16Speaker 01

  Very true.

• 0:17Matt McCusker?

  We've all warmed this space significantly.

• 0:19Speaker 02

  I like those heat rocks. Cook a steak on those.

• 0:22Speaker 01

  The heat's wild down here. I don't know how you deal with it.

• 0:24Matt McCusker?

  I like the heat. The cold is I get like when I don't feel the sun for like five months, I get real weird in my, I just, it's not good for me. I do. I get, I get sad. Are you laughing at my seasonal affective disorder?

• 0:38Speaker 01

  My body mind is low, goddammit.

• 0:39Matt McCusker?

  Survivor for 40 years. Seasonal affective disorder.

• 0:42Speaker 02

  I'm not laughing at it. I'm laughing at it. You are, you're someone who I admire in the sense of you know what a hundred percent is not good for you. You end a lot of sentences with, that's just not good for me. You know what I mean? So I respect it.

• 0:54Matt McCusker?

  We're talking about boundaries.

• 0:55Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 0:56Speaker 01

  I respect it. I like it.

• 0:58Matt McCusker?

  Have you ever tried to draw a boundary? I don't think it ever works.

• 1:01Speaker 01

  I've never done one ever. It's so foreign to me. It's so foreign to me.

• 1:07Matt McCusker?

  I've tried, but I always take it back. As soon as it leaves my mouth, I'm like, ah, nevermind.

• 1:10Speaker 02

  You know what? I'm never gonna stand.

• 1:12Speaker 01

  I wouldn't know what one is. You know what I mean? You can say or do anything with these, lay in the bed, whatever you want. It's insane.

• 1:19Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, I prefer to stew.

• 1:20Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:21Matt McCusker?

  So I let people cross over my boundaries and I go, fuck.

• 1:24Speaker 02

  Fucking, fucking.

• 1:24Matt McCusker?

  No respect at all for me. I guess I'm a piece of shit. And then I just, hey, how you doing? That's my boundaries.

• 1:31Speaker 02

  Hey, what's up? You wanna get breakfast? That's what I was doing with him this morning in my head.

• 1:35Speaker 01

  We've worked on that a little bit.

• 1:36Speaker 02

  I swear to God, dude, we had a quiet flight down here.

• 1:40Speaker 01

  Did you, boy?

• 1:40Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:41Speaker 01

  What happened? We're setting boundaries a little bit.

• 1:43Speaker 02

  I'm, I'm, this is so fine. I don't know. It's like, is there a leak in our organization that was like, ask about boundaries? You guys got the fucking TMZ scoop. These fucking, they, they don't look smart, but they're good. These guys.

• 1:58Matt McCusker?

  Well, to be fair, I've watched you guys fight since like 2004.

• 2:02Speaker 02

  That's a hundred percent.

• 2:05Matt McCusker?

  It's no secret. There's no link.

• 2:08Speaker 02

  I tell stupid I am. I'm like, man, these guys are good.

• 2:11Speaker 01

  Who you guys been fucking talking to?

• 2:14Speaker 02

  Meanwhile, you've seen us have each other in headlocks outside of the Raven Lounge.

• 2:19Speaker 01

  The enigma's going next.

• 2:22Speaker 01

  It's funny, looking back on it, it was like the stuff we used to argue about was so cute and adorable.

• 2:26Matt McCusker?

  It's so funny.

• 2:27Speaker 01

  Now it's serious business.

• 2:29Speaker 02

  Yeah, dude, we, I'm like, it's so, I say that to him sometimes. He's like, I don't ever wanna fight again. I go, we used to argue over YouTube videos that got a hundred views. Like, of course now that there's, things are gonna be tense now.

• 2:39Speaker 01

  He's grown up a lot. I'll give him that.

• 2:41Matt McCusker?

  That's nice.

• 2:41Speaker 01

  He has grown up a lot.

• 2:44Speaker 01

  He kinda stinks as a hang, but he's grown up.

• 2:46Speaker 02

  Oh yeah, you're, you're a real fucking peach, let me tell you.

• 2:48Speaker 01

  I went the other way.

• 2:49Matt McCusker?

  Really?

• 2:50Speaker 01

  Oh, man.

• 2:50Speaker 02

  It's crazy.

• 2:51Speaker 01

  I mean, you have the same thing.

• 2:52Speaker 02

  How bad of a hang he is.

• 2:54Speaker 01

  You got the family, kids, all that kinda stuff. He's gotta like prioritize this, that, the other thing, things that mean more. And I'm living in Ian's basement. It's like fucking.

• 3:02Matt McCusker?

  You're the dog. You're the dog. The family gets chewed in the crate.

• 3:05Speaker 02

  Yeah, cause he keeps shitting everywhere. And you're like, we dude, it's like, dude, we paid $2,000 for fucking training and that didn't take, we shit. You know, you're trying to help.

• 3:13Speaker 01

  Fighting people at the park.

• 3:15Matt McCusker?

  Yeah. How do you guys coordinate that? Me and Shane have the same thing. I have a kid. He doesn't, but he's, it's pretty gracious.

• 3:20Speaker 01

  Yeah, he's also fucking a millionaire, fucking one of the most famous comics on the planet.

• 3:24Matt McCusker?

  Even more the reason.

• 3:25Speaker 01

  I'm middle of the road, walking around like I'm a movie star. It drives him fucking nuts.

• 3:31Speaker 02

  He got spotted by one of our bullies at the airport. You did.

• 3:36Matt McCusker?

  When?

• 3:36Speaker 02

  He's talking about, you're saying, he's trying, he thinks he's very famous and he's like, he really, we could, we started, I go, you are Johnny Drama. He is.

• 3:43Speaker 01

  I don't think I'm famous. I have an audience.

• 3:48Speaker 01

  Did I do a good performance this season on Tires? Yeah, sure.

• 3:50Speaker 02

  Of course. Has that gone to your head immensely? Yes.

• 3:57Matt McCusker?

  You got recognized at the airport?

• 3:58Speaker 02

  No, he, dude, no, our boy saw him.

• 4:01Matt McCusker?

  Kevin, take a picture of us.

• 4:05Speaker 02

  Guys, can Kippy get in? He's like, no, no, no. This one's just for.

• 4:09Speaker 01

  What are we talking about on the plane?

• 4:10Speaker 02

  When Colin saw you. No, there's a lot, no. When Colin, when Colin Chamberlain saw you.

• 4:14Speaker 01

  That fucking rat. Forget about that.

• 4:15Speaker 02

  Dude, our boy, our main opener.

• 4:17Speaker 01

  Colin Chamberlain. Our boy is on the road for this. He's Kippy's boy.

• 4:20Speaker 02

  They bumped him. See, he really makes a lot of delineations.

• 4:24Speaker 01

  They all rat me out.

• 4:25Matt McCusker?

  Really?

• 4:25Speaker 01

  Oh, forget about it.

• 4:26Speaker 02

  Dude, rat?

• 4:28Speaker 01

  They know who, they know who daddy is. You kidding me? They know who writes the checks.

• 4:34Speaker 02

  That's what you think it is. No, you're also a comedian, dude. He's walking around Delta. He's walking around the terminal. He's got no luggage.

• 4:40Speaker 01

  Hold on a second. I sort of seen a young lady who lives in Cleveland. All right, I've been going back and forth a little bit.

• 4:44Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 4:45Speaker 01

  I had an audition coming up. I had the sides of my back pocket. I had checked my bag. It's like a Friday afternoon. I'm flying out to Cleveland.

• 4:51Speaker 02

  All these details aside, he's walking around the fucking airport with sunglasses on and a movie script in his back pocket. And you're gonna sit there and tell me you don't like being fucking recognized?

• 5:02Speaker 01

  And Colin comes up to us, he's talking to me normal. Hey, doing good to see you.

• 5:05Speaker 02

  That's insane, right?

• 5:07Speaker 01

  What are you talking about?

• 5:08Matt McCusker?

  In a director's chair on the show.

• 5:11Speaker 01

  I had to memorize my lines for a goddamn audition.

• 5:14Speaker 02

  That you didn't get.

• 5:15Speaker 01

  I, I turned it down. I didn't like the script.

• 5:19Speaker 02

  Dude, my head hurts already.

• 5:20Speaker 01

  You gotta say no a little bit, boys. You know what I'm saying? That makes one even more.

• 5:25Matt McCusker?

  If you don't say no, your yes is worthless.

• 5:27Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's great. That's great.

• 5:31Speaker 01

  I'm done with auditions. I'll tell you that right now.

• 5:33Matt McCusker?

  I did one against that very wall. So I did an audition and I've only done.

• 5:38Speaker 02

  What are you auditioning for?

• 5:39Matt McCusker?

  Alabama headed. Anything. They'll send me. I'll, I try. I did one audition and the only reason I did it because in this one instance, I happened to know through like a, a family connection that the producer was like loosely related to my family. So I'm like, here we go. I'm in nepo baby, full nepo baby.

• 6:00Speaker 02

  Cause someone in your family tree knows a guy.

• 6:03Matt McCusker?

  Three degrees of separation, but we met once. I'm like, bro, he's gonna see my name and tap me up. The big leagues.

• 6:09Speaker 01

  The big leagues. What are you, oh, you're in the big leagues. Ain't no big leagues. What was it? Tulsa King? What were you reading for?

• 6:16Matt McCusker?

  I denied Tulsa King.

• 6:18Speaker 01

  The one that just came out about the guy behind the door?

• 6:20Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, I forget. It was something, I got some Tulsa, no, no, my, maybe Landman. It was one of those like constipated old managers.

• 6:27Speaker 02

  Those shows kinda rule though. They do a little bit.

• 6:29Matt McCusker?

  They do. They're nice. Yellowstone was awesome.

• 6:31Speaker 02

  Yellowstone, yeah, Yellowstone.

• 6:33Matt McCusker?

  Although if you watch it on TV, the shit they edited out on network television, I thought ruined the show.

• 6:38Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 6:39Speaker 01

  Hmm.

• 6:40Matt McCusker?

  But yeah.

• 6:40Speaker 01

  I just watch it on YouTube shorts.

• 6:44Speaker 01

  The big guy in the hot redhead. That's all I see. Him throwing a snake or fucking banging his wife. That's all I need.

• 6:50Matt McCusker?

  Are you going for Tulsa Kings?

• 6:52Speaker 01

  No, I, I read for Tulsa Kings, uh, like fat guy behind the door. And I'm like, I'm not doing it. Then I go back to Ian's place and Ian got the same audition. What? Yeah. I'm like, what the, what are we doing here? What is cattle call? The fuck outta here with this shit.

• 7:09Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 7:09Speaker 01

  I'll find Olander for 500 bucks. I got cash.

• 7:12Speaker 02

  No, you don't.

• 7:13Speaker 01

  No, I don't. I'm bad news.

• 7:14Matt McCusker?

  I, I get scripts every now and again. It's like.

• 7:16Speaker 02

  He's also broke for the record.

• 7:17Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah. Super broke. I fucked up. Oh, yeah.

• 7:20Matt McCusker?

  It happens. Every great artist, man.

• 7:22Speaker 01

  That's what I figure.

• 7:23Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 7:23Speaker 02

  You know what'll help that? More movie scripts in the back pocket. I'll really turn the shit.

• 7:27Speaker 01

  I didn't like the script.

• 7:28Speaker 02

  Talk about not focusing on the right thing.

• 7:31Speaker 01

  We're focused on the right thing. What are you talking?

• 7:33Matt McCusker?

  So you guys, that's why you guys had a silent riot, cause you were just peeping what he was up to and you were just monkey please. This episode is brought to you by Viori. Guys, we've been wearing Viori lately. It's a game changer. The core shorts work for pretty much anything. Gym, errands, hanging around the house, whatever. Matt, and the Strato Tech tee? Insanely soft. You're gonna wanna wear it 24/7. Everything is comfortable, but looks good at the same time. It just works. It just works. Get 20% off your first purchase at Viori.com slash MSSP and discover the versatility of Viori clothing. Exclusions apply. Visit the website for full terms and conditions.

• 8:14Speaker 01

  There was the, the latest incident is, uh.

• 8:17Speaker 02

  This, this is funny, cause we, this, you guys are getting the fucking TMZ.

• 8:20Speaker 01

  Are we allowed to talk about this?

• 8:21Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's, I mean, it's embarrassing for you for sure, if you wanna talk about it.

• 8:25Speaker 01

  It's funny. I don't see it like that, to be honest with you.

• 8:27Speaker 02

  As someone who did what you did, I would assume so.

• 8:30Speaker 01

  I've overstepped on the corporate credit card a little bit over the last couple of weeks.

• 8:33Speaker 02

  A little bit is a drastic statement, I feel.

• 8:36Matt McCusker?

  Really? But you can write that off.

• 8:37Speaker 01

  That's what I said.

• 8:40Speaker 01

  What are we doing here?

• 8:42Matt McCusker?

  You're getting ahead of next year's taxes.

• 8:44Speaker 01

  I'm getting ahead of it. Yeah, I'm raising it all. But it was taken from me like my badge or my gun.

• 8:50Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 8:51Speaker 01

  Which I'm okay with. I'm all right with it. I didn't, no pushback.

• 8:54Speaker 02

  I just said, I said, I think, listen, I didn't, I didn't, I didn't reprimand.

• 8:58Speaker 01

  Did you like my response on the first thing? When you were like, hey, this is whatever? I thought I was very hand up, like, hey, no problem. Whatever you need. I wanna do good.

• 9:07Speaker 02

  Sure. Yeah. That was just like, hey, man.

• 9:09Matt McCusker?

  You got me.

• 9:11Speaker 02

  That's right.

• 9:19Speaker 02

  Uh, thanks, bro.

• 9:20Speaker 01

  Seventy, what the fuck? What are we in fucking Fort Myers, seventy? You're a millionaire, it should be like fifty-six in this joint. What are you guys doing?

• 9:29Speaker 02

  Holy can't work under these conditions.

• 9:31Matt McCusker?

  This guy can't get cold.

• 9:32Speaker 02

  Uh, is that what it is?

• 9:33Matt McCusker?

  My plants, I keep it hot for my plants.

• 9:34Speaker 01

  What is that, by the way?

• 9:35Matt McCusker?

  Or dendrum or something?

• 9:36Speaker 02

  You don't even know the name of it.

• 9:37Speaker 01

  Dendrum?

• 9:39Matt McCusker?

  I don't know. Monstera, that's what it is.

• 9:41Speaker 01

  Wow. God dog, way to go.

• 9:43Matt McCusker?

  You say it's wilting?

• 9:45Speaker 02

  That's a little sad looking.

• 9:46Matt McCusker?

  Well, yeah, I haven't been here in a couple of weeks, so.

• 9:48Speaker 01

  I have a money tree at my old apartment.

• 9:50Matt McCusker?

  Do you really?

• 9:51Speaker 01

  For like seven years.

• 9:51Matt McCusker?

  You got one back there?

• 9:52Speaker 01

  You do? Yeah, it's nice.

• 9:53Matt McCusker?

  I do like those things.

• 9:54Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's the only thing I've ever like taken care of for a long time. Now, my ex-wife's got it.

• 9:59Matt McCusker?

  And they did, it paid off, you had the card.

• 10:01Speaker 01

  Yeah, the card for a little while was alright. But I feel like if that thing dies, I'm fucked.

• 10:05Speaker 02

  That's what his money tree brought was. Missed, missed user company.

• 10:11Speaker 01

  I wouldn't say that, come on, what are you talking about?

• 10:13Matt McCusker?

  What was the damage? What was the damage?

• 10:15Speaker 01

  Well, we don't need to get into that shit.

• 10:18Matt McCusker?

  So it's taken.

• 10:20Speaker 02

  It was, no, I, I didn't, I, I did not take it. I said, hey, man, we need to reassess.

• 10:25Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 10:26Speaker 02

  The Karen situation with the, with the Amex.

• 10:30Speaker 01

  Which was actually very nice, he's been very cool about everything.

• 10:33Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 10:34Speaker 01

  To be honest with you.

• 10:35Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 10:35Matt McCusker?

  It's a father.

• 10:35Speaker 01

  Not a great hang, but very, very stern.

• 10:38Speaker 02

  It's a hang, it's crazy.

• 10:40Speaker 01

  Very stern, but when I think about it, I'm like, wow.

• 10:42Speaker 02

  Stern, I just, I, I go, hey, man, this is a business partner, we need to reassess, this is a problem.

• 10:46Speaker 01

  Which I said, okay, no problem.

• 10:47Speaker 02

  We need to reassess it.

• 10:49Speaker 01

  You said, turn your card, and I said.

• 10:50Speaker 02

  No, I said, I feel better if you didn't have the card.

• 10:53Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 10:53Speaker 02

  And I think that's.

• 10:54Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 10:55Matt McCusker?

  It's fair.

• 10:55Speaker 02

  I think that's fair.

• 10:56Speaker 01

  I'm completely on my own now.

• 10:57Speaker 02

  You've lost.

• 10:58Speaker 01

  Which, which is what I'm actually like. I'm in the middle of recovery, all that stuff.

• 11:03Speaker 02

  Completely on my own is crazy. It's just like, that was the last straw.

• 11:09Speaker 02

  Yeah. Uh, yeah, so it was, you know, it was like a lot, it was, you know.

• 11:13Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 11:13Speaker 02

  It was more money than I made in twenty nineteen, he spent in the last thirty days.

• 11:17Speaker 01

  Which is funny, you never checked to see if there was any.

• 11:18Matt McCusker?

  Bad economy.

• 11:19Speaker 01

  Any, uh, identity theft or anything on that.

• 11:21Matt McCusker?

  True.

• 11:22Speaker 01

  That seems like a lot.

• 11:22Matt McCusker?

  Could have been some suspicious, suspicious.

• 11:24Speaker 02

  Well, it's kinda funny, cause like, Amex is pretty detailed with the charges, so, yeah.

• 11:29Matt McCusker?

  Sounds like suspicious activity to me.

• 11:31Speaker 01

  I think it does, yeah.

• 11:33Speaker 02

  Unless someone stole your credit card, then flew out to Cleveland a bunch to see your girlfriend.

• 11:38Speaker 01

  I never put anything on, I never put a flight on that card.

• 11:41Speaker 02

  You put six flights on the card.

• 11:42Speaker 01

  Really?

• 11:43Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 11:44Speaker 01

  Oh, fuck.

• 11:44Matt McCusker?

  First class?

• 11:45Speaker 02

  You feel, fuck, you didn't, what do you mean, you did not know that?

• 11:48Speaker 01

  I didn't know that.

• 11:49Matt McCusker?

  Wrong card.

• 11:49Speaker 02

  Isn't that crazy?

• 11:50Matt McCusker?

  Wrong card.

• 11:51Speaker 01

  Yeah, wrong card.

• 11:52Speaker 02

  Hand up, wrong card.

• 11:53Speaker 01

  Hand up on that, I'll give you that right now, I told you we could.

• 11:56Speaker 02

  He's gonna give me that. You believe a good guy like this is gonna give me that?

• 11:59Speaker 01

  I got you.

• 12:01Speaker 02

  Holy shit, why don't you just say that from the beginning? There wouldn't have been a contentious conversation.

• 12:06Speaker 01

  I think you were awesome about it, and I apologize, and I think we're moving forward, and we're great.

• 12:10Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, true.

• 12:10Speaker 01

  Pod's the biggest it's ever been, we're back in our flow, we're doing great, got the special coming out.

• 12:14Matt McCusker?

  That's what I'm talking about, yeah.

• 12:15Speaker 02

  Yeah, shout out, American Garbage on the YouTube channel.

• 12:17Matt McCusker?

  Hell, yeah.

• 12:17Speaker 02

  Gotta pay for the big man's Amex bill.

• 12:20Speaker 01

  Got the new tour, Tires, season three was a big hit, everybody's doing alright.

• 12:23Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 12:23Speaker 01

  We're doing alright, we're good.

• 12:24Matt McCusker?

  That's awesome.

• 12:24Speaker 01

  Yeah, no worries at all, everybody play cool.

• 12:28Speaker 02

  Everybody play cool, like us, we're just chilling, vibing over here. Uh, yeah, so it's, yeah, there's been, uh.

• 12:34Speaker 01

  I apologize.

• 12:35Speaker 02

  There's some boundaries that were.

• 12:37Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 12:37Speaker 02

  That's a boundary, it's just, hey.

• 12:39Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 12:39Speaker 02

  Yeah. You know, you've kinda proven you can't be, you know.

• 12:42Speaker 01

  Trust it.

• 12:43Speaker 02

  Listen, I don't know if anybody's gonna be like, ye, ye, use the card.

• 12:46Matt McCusker?

  He's kinda financially dominating you right now, it's kinda kink.

• 12:49Speaker 02

  Fin dom.

• 12:51Speaker 02

  I'm kippy dom, dog, let's go.

• 12:53Speaker 01

  I thought about that a little bit, I thought about that a little bit, like, you know, like, what are you talking about? We're doing, we, we, we, we won the lottery, we're doing great, all this kinda stuff, but he is my blind trust in such a way. That he's the only person in my life that I don't question. But you say whatever, I'm cool with it, whatever, cause I've realized, I put him through hell over the last year or so.

• 13:12Matt McCusker?

  Got the family, wants to enjoy his life, all that kinda stuff, got the house, loving family, doing very well, like, happy for him.

• 13:19Speaker 01

  You know, I, at some point, I gotta knock this shit off.

• 13:21Matt McCusker?

  True.

• 13:22Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's all we ask, dude, that's, it's just like, it's like.

• 13:24Speaker 01

  Well, the fact. Show up and be funny, that's it.

• 13:26Speaker 02

  Dude, I just go, I go, dude, you have zero responsibility, I got, we built this spaceship together, I'm, I can, I'm captain it, like, I got the, you know, I, I got it from the business standpoint.

• 13:35Speaker 01

  A lot of overhead, don't take that.

• 13:37Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 13:38Speaker 02

  Yeah, the Amex bill, dude, it's crazy.

• 13:40Speaker 01

  Not the Amex bill.

• 13:41Speaker 02

  Well, that's, that's part of overhead. I don't know.

• 13:46Matt McCusker?

  The fact that you guys are pushing through and just continuing to create, so it's important.

• 13:49Speaker 01

  I think so.

• 13:49Speaker 02

  But, of, of course.

• 13:50Speaker 01

  We're not, we're not stupid, you know what I mean?

• 13:53Matt McCusker?

  True.

• 13:53Speaker 01

  Yeah, got a good thing going, like we were talking about before, you know what I mean?

• 13:56Speaker 02

  I also.

• 13:56Speaker 01

  We're all, ain't it crazy, from the Raven, here we, here where the fuck we are.

• 14:00Matt McCusker?

  I mean.

• 14:01Speaker 01

  It's every one of you retards, right? You all came through there at some point, Cassidy was running it, Six was running it, whatever.

• 14:10Speaker 02

  Oh, you looked, you moved into my house? Damn.

• 14:13Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, that's right.

• 14:13Speaker 02

  Let's go, so we started on, uh.

• 14:15Speaker 01

  Garnini, I was banging your sister for a little bit, I remember that, yeah.

• 14:18Speaker 02

  She's fourteen, that's a little weird.

• 14:20Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, she was ten years old.

• 14:23Speaker 01

  You son of a bitch.

• 14:24Matt McCusker?

  They, the Ravens are for sale, you guys.

• 14:26Speaker 02

  I saw, I was thinking about, I was thinking about buying it, but we spent all of our money on the Amex bill.

• 14:30Speaker 01

  No, don't take that, stop it, don't be like that. I never did anything maliciously or big purchases or anything like that, get outta here, we talking.

• 14:38Matt McCusker?

  It's original owner, he selling it right now?

• 14:40Speaker 02

  Uh, I don't know, I know, I saw it was up for, I walked by or something, or someone sent a picture of like, it's up for sale.

• 14:46Matt McCusker?

  Right.

• 14:47Speaker 01

  Which the heartness or like the nostalgia is, would wanna do it, but then you're like, what are we fucking talking about?

• 14:51Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 14:51Speaker 02

  This dude, it'd be cool.

• 14:53Matt McCusker?

  Screaming at each other in the Raven again after twenty years.

• 14:55Speaker 01

  You're doing auditions, what are you not, what are you, crazy?

• 14:56Matt McCusker?

  Just for fun, honestly. Yeah, it's good. It's really just for fun.

• 15:00Speaker 01

  It's dumb shit. Fucking beating.

• 15:03Matt McCusker?

  No, though, dude, the, that, I remember, the Raven starting out was for real like the best, it was like, you guys ran it to where like, if you did bad, you were off, like, get the fuck outta here.

• 15:12Speaker 02

  I, yeah.

• 15:13Matt McCusker?

  They let go of all that and everything just crumbled.

• 15:15Speaker 02

  Yeah, well, that was like, you know, uh, they were running it when I, when I, when I first started, you guys were all kinda there when I came in, and I was, I was like, oh, this is. I remember seeing like McKeever and Pope and being like, these are the two funniest, I'm like, these are like, famous level guys, like, I remember going like, if I could be half that funny, maybe, that would be cool one day.

• 15:35Speaker 01

  And we always knew they were better than us, so we would put them on at the end of the showcase. We weren't the fucking dickheads that like have fucking McKeever host, and I close out with twenty minutes of fucking fat guy material, in a fucking blazer, what are we doing here?

• 15:49Matt McCusker?

  It's Barry McKeever.

• 15:52Matt McCusker?

  I, I remember when McKeever, when I first saw him, and I remember being like, damn, this guy's funny as fuck.

• 15:56Speaker 02

  I was like, cause like, you would go up, and everybody was.

• 15:59Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 15:59Speaker 02

  Everybody was like kinda funny, you know, like, funny, you're like, oh, there's, I see people are trying.

• 16:03Matt McCusker?

  Dude, first half.

• 16:04Speaker 02

  And was like, I remember like the polish of him and Tommy, and I'm like, oh, this is, these guys are fucking locked in.

• 16:09Matt McCusker?

  I do remember, first half at the Raven was like varsity level, I remember being so excited to sling like four minutes first half on the Raven, and then you'd bomb and get back to the second and be like.

• 16:19Speaker 02

  Dude, did you ever hear?

• 16:20Matt McCusker?

  What'd I do?

• 16:21Speaker 02

  Did you ever hear that story?

• 16:22Speaker 01

  Fuck, McCusker, fucking ruined me. I'm all perked up.

• 16:25Speaker 02

  Dude, he did that to me. First night, dude.

• 16:29Speaker 01

  That's what they don't get, we didn't give a fuck.

• 16:31Speaker 02

  First night, I go up, blind luck, do pretty well.

• 16:34Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 16:35Speaker 02

  I'm like, fucking alright, I go back to next week, someone, who, like, it would have been you, somebody was like supposed to.

• 16:41Speaker 01

  He was gonna be my prodigy.

• 16:42Speaker 02

  Somebody more established was supposed to close out, but they weren't in the room. So he, I see him darting around, you know, and he's like, come here, you did good last week, kid, I need one outta you right now.

• 16:52Speaker 01

  Old pop fisher. Ryan, get up here.

• 16:54Speaker 02

  Fucking, you know, scratching his neck and shit, all zooted.

• 16:57Speaker 01

  I need six dollars and three Percocets. You're my guy.

• 17:02Speaker 02

  And he's like, uh, ye, ye, ye, good, I'm like, I'm like, yeah, and now, and I'm like, this is.

• 17:06Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 17:07Speaker 02

  This is how I saw it in my head, I walked in, I'm the funniest guy.

• 17:10Matt McCusker?

  You're the kid.

• 17:11Speaker 02

  I'm the motherfucking kid, dude. The motherfucking kid is here, let's go.

• 17:18Speaker 01

  And I'm like. Stories about me.

• 17:19Speaker 02

  Yeah, I'm like, this is, this is what you see in movies, this is my moment, this is my.

• 17:25Matt McCusker?

  You'll be in Slowly's back pocket.

• 17:30Speaker 01

  Like Elvis and his manager?

• 17:34Matt McCusker?

  Be a script in his pocket.

• 17:35Speaker 02

  I'm like, this is it, dude, let's go.

• 17:37Speaker 01

  And you fucking blew it.

• 17:39Speaker 02

  I didn't know how.

• 17:40Speaker 01

  Embarrass me.

• 17:42Speaker 01

  With your shitty fucking Banana Republic jacket on, your fat head and bad haircut. Looking at, running outta town. But I needed you.

• 17:51Speaker 02

  You needed a ride home.

• 17:52Speaker 01

  I need a ride home. Take it off, kid, you get it next week.

• 17:56Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 17:57Speaker 01

  Taking money out of his pocket like Lefty from Bowlberry Street. Hey, you gotta ride it, you're alright.

• 18:03Speaker 02

  I didn't know how comedy works, so I wrote a new five minutes that week. And I, so I went up with a brand new five minutes, and I, dude, I, he turned his back visibly in the crowd, after about forty-five seconds of me, dude, I'm like pulling on the cord and shit, I'm like all nervous.

• 18:20Matt McCusker?

  I don't know.

• 18:20Speaker 02

  He walked out of the room, dude.

• 18:22Speaker 01

  Like Yoda when Luke left the fucking jungle planet. That boy was our last hope.

• 18:27Speaker 02

  I've been trying.

• 18:28Speaker 01

  No, there is another.

• 18:28Speaker 02

  I've been trying to get his approval back ever since.

• 18:32Matt McCusker?

  I remember, I, I did, uh. This episode is brought to you by PrizePicks, football is finally back, and PrizePicks is bringing the heat for the start of the season with stacked September.

• 18:46Matt McCusker?

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• 19:27Matt McCusker?

  To get a hundred and fifty dollars instantly in lineups, if you win your first five dollar lineup, PrizePicks.

• 19:33Speaker 01

  Run your game.

• 19:39Matt McCusker?

  A long time ago, I did one of the Phillies funniest, like the very first time I competed. I made it to the finals.

• 19:45Speaker 02

  Compete is funny.

• 19:45Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, I remember I made it to the finals and I was like, holy shit, this is it. I remember my family was there and they're like, you're not gonna do the same shit you did before. And I was like, no. And I just did all new stuff and bombed in the finals and was like, oh, fuck. Why'd I do that?

• 20:00Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's crazy.

• 20:01Matt McCusker?

  So fuck no, I'm gonna hit you guys with a new five. Check this out.

• 20:04Speaker 01

  I remember when I did the semifinals of Phillies funniest, Tommy, I think, had might have already gotten new faces or he'd won it and he was hosting. And he looked at me, we hadn't, we weren't really talking that much at that time. And he's like, big smile before you go out there. And I still think about that. And I go out on stage, big smile. That was the pointer he gave me. Then he pulled his dick out and was like, you see this thing?

• 20:28Speaker 01

  Yeah, we fucking.

• 20:29Speaker 02

  You say we get a backup blow.

• 20:33Speaker 01

  Never did coke with Tommy Pope.

• 20:34Matt McCusker?

  There you go.

• 20:35Speaker 01

  Yeah, I got that going for me. Anyway, sorry about the.

• 20:40Speaker 02

  That's okay, I got that going.

• 20:42Speaker 01

  So yeah, we have boundaries now.

• 20:43Speaker 02

  No, we're just, it's listen, you know, to, uh, to, we're different people from when we started the show.

• 20:49Speaker 01

  It's crazy.

• 20:50Speaker 02

  You know, one of us, one chose left, one chose right. We're trying to like, you know.

• 20:54Speaker 01

  I didn't choose anything.

• 20:55Speaker 02

  You're right, I did, I'm sorry.

• 20:58Speaker 02

  I made the choices like a guy in Ian's basement. Um, I came off harsh, I apologize.

• 21:05Speaker 01

  That's all I gotta do. I just gotta sit back, play the victim. He says something mean and all of a sudden I'm back on top.

• 21:10Speaker 02

  Nobody thinks you're the victim.

• 21:13Speaker 02

  In any sort of unit, check the, check the YouTube comments.

• 21:17Speaker 02

  There's a bloodbath over on Patreon at the moment.

• 21:19Speaker 01

  We're getting back there a little bit. Everybody loves a comeback.

• 21:22Matt McCusker?

  That's true.

• 21:25Speaker 02

  I'm not even fucking around. He's been saying that for four years.

• 21:29Speaker 01

  I lost a hundred pounds. I look good. What the fuck do you want from me?

• 21:31Matt McCusker?

  That's what I'm saying.

• 21:33Speaker 01

  It's all Hollywood cares about. Looking good, baby.

• 21:35Speaker 02

  The other day on the Patreon, he goes, we're like trying to like, hey, man, just maybe, you know, focus a little bit here that you're doing, you're making, dude, he's in recovery. We're, you know, we're.

• 21:42Speaker 01

  Meetings, therapy.

• 21:44Matt McCusker?

  How long you been in recovery for?

• 21:46Speaker 01

  The last time I relapsed was March 6th here.

• 21:49Speaker 02

  We're back to the scene of the crime. That's why it's a quick in and out trip.

• 21:52Matt McCusker?

  True.

• 21:53Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 21:53Matt McCusker?

  Austin gets people though. I've, I've heard something about it.

• 21:56Speaker 02

  Apparently in New York, LA, Pennsylvania.

• 21:59Speaker 01

  Delaware.

• 22:00Speaker 02

  Can you go back to LA? I'm like, it's not LA, it's him.

• 22:04Speaker 01

  Which we just went to LA, was great and did here and was great.

• 22:07Matt McCusker?

  Well, it's good, man. I'm happy for you. That's really.

• 22:09Speaker 02

  Yeah, no. So he's, he's obviously, you know, all jokes aside, he's, you know, I, he's making great strides. That's obviously very.

• 22:15Speaker 01

  I got a tan, I look good, I got to watch.

• 22:18Speaker 02

  Well, the other day on the Patreon, he goes, so alls I need to do is focus on getting better looking? And we're like, that's what you took from our intervention as convers. He goes, no, I need to continue, I just need to continue to get good looking.

• 22:30Matt McCusker?

  Looks max and bodies max. He's right.

• 22:32Speaker 02

  Capicular.

• 22:36Speaker 01

  I gotta get one of those.

• 22:38Matt McCusker?

  You lost a hundred?

• 22:39Speaker 01

  Like a hundred and twenty. I started at four thirty-five, I'm, uh.

• 22:43Speaker 02

  What we know about, could have been, could have been pumped up.

• 22:46Matt McCusker?

  Damn, that's fucking wild, man. That's.

• 22:49Speaker 01

  Didn't really do much, just puke it up and whatever.

• 22:53Speaker 02

  Got no bone marrow left.

• 22:54Matt McCusker?

  Vogel claimed that, the guy from Subway claimed that that's what made him a pedophile. He said he lost so much weight that all that like craving just got.

• 23:00Speaker 02

  Well, that's kind of where that they say that with Zepbound, they say, or like with the GLP-1s that you're not curing the, like you have some sort of addiction and it was food at some point. And then like, when you lose all this weight and you don't fill it with whatever or kind of correcting. Something, you know, the drugs come back. A lot of people relapse on alcohol and stuff like that.

• 23:19Speaker 01

  Yeah, I'll give him that, but it takes away the addiction to lose the weight. You know what I mean?

• 23:24Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 23:24Speaker 01

  Does that make sense? And since I'm in recovery and learning this stuff, it's actually working out a little bit.

• 23:29Matt McCusker?

  But it takes away the addiction.

• 23:31Speaker 01

  I have a food addiction for sure. I have a weird relationship with food. So it was like, just, you know, eat right, exercise, all that kind of stuff. I needed to take that away. It takes that away.

• 23:39Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 23:40Speaker 01

  You know what I mean? It numbs that a little bit.

• 23:41Matt McCusker?

  Yeah. And then, yeah, I, I've heard that before. I remember there was those articles where it's like GLP-1s block the signal for love. It's like, yeah, so does, you know, just be over too.

• 23:52Speaker 01

  I got that too. I'm in sex and love addict meetings and shit like that.

• 23:55Matt McCusker?

  Really?

• 23:55Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 23:57Matt McCusker?

  Nice.

• 23:58Speaker 02

  A little bit of a menagerie.

• 23:59Speaker 01

  I got it all.

• 24:00Matt McCusker?

  Full, full thing, yeah.

• 24:01Speaker 01

  I wouldn't know what real love is, to be honest with you. Okay, fair enough.

• 24:07Speaker 01

  Went a little too far.

• 24:10Speaker 02

  It's a comedy podcast, right?

• 24:13Speaker 01

  Whatever, I'm sorry about the goddamn credit card.

• 24:14Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, I feel you. I feel you on that though.

• 24:16Speaker 01

  Thanks, big dog.

• 24:17Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, my heart froze a long time ago.

• 24:20Speaker 01

  Yeah, it really did.

• 24:21Speaker 02

  Damn, dude.

• 24:22Matt McCusker?

  Cold. Cold ass mother, I'm just a cold ass motherfucker, bro.

• 24:25Speaker 01

  You're a good dad.

• 24:26Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, I'm.

• 24:27Speaker 01

  I love your wife, all that stuff. You're doing well.

• 24:28Matt McCusker?

  Good husband.

• 24:29Speaker 01

  Good husband?

• 24:30Matt McCusker?

  Yep.

• 24:30Speaker 02

  Got it.

• 24:31Speaker 01

  You always were a little cold though, like in a, like a, uh, Sicario kind of way.

• 24:35Matt McCusker?

  I'm a little cold.

• 24:36Speaker 01

  Ice cold.

• 24:37Matt McCusker?

  I'm ice cold.

• 24:37Speaker 02

  He's an operator.

• 24:40Speaker 02

  He's level one operator.

• 24:41Speaker 01

  I never got in the hole with him. He wouldn't let it.

• 24:43Speaker 02

  What?

• 24:44Speaker 01

  Anything. He could never go in the book with McCusker.

• 24:47Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 24:47Speaker 01

  Right there.

• 24:48Speaker 02

  No longer on the book.

• 24:50Speaker 01

  Cover it up. Then we used to drop him off in some weird neighborhood.

• 24:53Speaker 02

  Yeah, yourself.

• 24:54Speaker 01

  Yeah, he would walk through an abandoned field.

• 24:56Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, that was right. That was my West Philly house.

• 24:58Speaker 01

  And me and Cotton were like, Jesus Christ, this guy's fucking crazy.

• 25:01Matt McCusker?

  It's funny, Cotton was, I wasn't far from him.

• 25:03Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 25:03Matt McCusker?

  He was a little further west. I think Cotton was the one who showed me the Blue Moon Motel. Did you ever see that place?

• 25:09Speaker 01

  No.

• 25:10Matt McCusker?

  Shouldn't even tell you, dude, it's, uh. I remember I was dropping him off and like he pointed it out and I was like, yo, what the fuck? I always see it. I'm like, what is that place? And he's like, oh dude, it's like infested with prostitutes. I don't know if it's still there anymore, but right on like 50 something in West Philly, it's this like.

• 25:24Speaker 02

  That was on the Amex bill.

• 25:26Speaker 01

  Stop it. That's crazy. We talking about.

• 25:29Matt McCusker?

  That's too far.

• 25:30Speaker 02

  They said it'd come up as Expedia.

• 25:32Matt McCusker?

  Dude, it's right.

• 25:35Matt McCusker?

  I don't know if it, I want to see if it's still there.

• 25:36Speaker 01

  There's a shivago.

• 25:38Matt McCusker?

  It's one of those places, it's in like a, you know, a pretty depressed neighborhood. It's in like the middle of the hood, but then there's this bright blue building. It says the Blue Moon Motel and it's just.

• 25:47Speaker 02

  We had.

• 25:48Matt McCusker?

  They're out there, dude. The walkers are out there and it's, it's like.

• 25:50Speaker 01

  Yeah, not a walker guy.

• 25:52Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 25:52Speaker 01

  Like the high end.

• 25:53Matt McCusker?

  That's good. That's good. Really, that is actually really good. Walkers, that's tough stuff.

• 25:58Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 26:00Matt McCusker?

  It's shut down. There's a, so my, my dad and his brothers all worked in Chester for a long time.

• 26:05Speaker 01

  Right.

• 26:05Matt McCusker?

  They would drive in and there was, there was ladies that would just stand there like this in the morning. That was like the price, it's five bucks. Crack, just hold up their hand, five bucks, four.

• 26:14Speaker 01

  You gotta know your value.

• 26:15Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 26:15Speaker 01

  It's like me in acting, not auditioning.

• 26:17Speaker 02

  Obviously.

• 26:18Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, you're going straight to the table.

• 26:20Speaker 01

  Straight to the table. Offer, right?

• 26:22Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 26:22Speaker 01

  None of them come in at all. So I'm on the street.

• 26:27Speaker 01

  And some of those, you see those streetwalkers, you're like, fucking hottie shit. What are you doing?

• 26:30Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 26:31Speaker 01

  And you like to party and you're fun. You're crazy. You're undervaluing yourself.

• 26:34Matt McCusker?

  You should start, you should get behind one of them, man.

• 26:35Speaker 01

  That's what I'm talking about.

• 26:36Matt McCusker?

  You know what I'm saying?

• 26:36Speaker 01

  We more or something.

• 26:37Matt McCusker?

  Behind every Halle Berry, there's a Tyler Perry, you know what I'm saying?

• 26:40Speaker 01

  I'm talking about.

• 26:41Speaker 02

  Wait, is that a thing? Did you just come up with that? That's crazy.

• 26:43Matt McCusker?

  No, I saw it on a pimp interview on self.

• 26:46Speaker 01

  See, I couldn't do it. I'm not tough enough.

• 26:48Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, I would be, those hoes would walk all over me.

• 26:50Speaker 01

  Yeah, I remember when Howard Stern, this guy.

• 26:56Speaker 01

  It's 12:30, get the fuck out there.

• 27:01Matt McCusker?

  Take the day off, alright?

• 27:04Speaker 01

  At Howard Stern, one time this guy called in, when like Don the One, whatever his name was, you know, that guy, Steve Boggs boy?

• 27:09Matt McCusker?

  Bishop Don Juan?

• 27:10Speaker 01

  Yeah, and he was like, uh, I think I.

• 27:11Speaker 02

  Dude, fucking, you are tapped into the pimping world, dude. It ain't easy.

• 27:16Matt McCusker?

  Unfortunately, I am right now.

• 27:17Speaker 01

  You know his government name?

• 27:18Matt McCusker?

  Bishop Don Juan, Magic, what is it? Magic Bishop Don Juan or something?

• 27:21Speaker 02

  Something like that. He had, dude, that was crazy. He was just like an actual pimp and like kind of got pushed to the front of pop culture for like two years.

• 27:27Matt McCusker?

  They were, they were.

• 27:28Speaker 02

  He was in old school and shit.

• 27:29Matt McCusker?

  They're making a comeback. They're starting to try to make a little bit of a comeback right now.

• 27:32Speaker 01

  Pimps?

• 27:33Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, pimps.

• 27:34Speaker 01

  Really?

• 27:34Matt McCusker?

  Real pimps. I'm talking about real pimping.

• 27:36Speaker 01

  Yeah, you don't need them.

• 27:36Speaker 02

  Like street level. Cause like the OnlyFans thing, they, they get kind of pimped out.

• 27:40Matt McCusker?

  Yeah. OnlyFans thing, dude, do you know the OnlyFans thing? Apparently, so you get, you get a manager and then you record a ton of content for a year and then you just stop.

• 27:48Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 27:49Matt McCusker?

  And then you just have this like archive of content.

• 27:53Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, they're banking apps.

• 27:54Speaker 02

  They're going on the road, they're banking apps.

• 27:56Matt McCusker?

  And then it's just Lithuanian dudes, a team of Lithuanian guys talking to guys jerking off and they're just like, sitting somewhere, probably just getting like their ass kicked by like a Russian guy somewhere.

• 28:06Matt McCusker?

  Sad.

• 28:06Speaker 01

  You want them to enjoy it and do what they want and all that stuff. Fucking crap.

• 28:11Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, well, it's weird. The weird thing about, like, uh, the weird thing about like pimping is that I've like. Well, there is a courtship element to it. So like, it is a business transaction, but as a pimp, the way you get your hoes, you're almost courting them because you're going to control all their money.

• 28:27Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's like sociopath. Yeah. So you have to go like, hey, I'm going to come in like we're friends. I'm gonna, let me take care of you. And then it's like, then it turns and it's like, this is now.

• 28:34Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 28:35Speaker 02

  It's a different relation.

• 28:36Matt McCusker?

  Well, yeah, that's, yeah.

• 28:37Speaker 01

  That I don't like.

• 28:38Matt McCusker?

  That's if you're gorilla pimping. So if you're, that's if you're beating them up and feeding them drugs.

• 28:41Speaker 01

  Getting your hair done.

• 28:44Matt McCusker?

  Magic Don Juan says it's all about, about love.

• 28:47Speaker 01

  Really?

• 28:48Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 28:48Speaker 01

  Good for him.

• 28:49Matt McCusker?

  It's about love.

• 28:49Speaker 01

  You're gonna be able to lay the pipe with that shit though.

• 28:51Speaker 02

  Yeah, I'm out.

• 28:53Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, I'm out of the draft for sure.

• 28:55Speaker 02

  They be tiny dick mother, they be yelling back at me.

• 28:58Speaker 01

  You like getting eaten out?

• 28:59Matt McCusker?

  She'd be like, I'm like, you're gonna do what I say. She's like, you're almost done. I'm like, yeah, I'm almost done. Hold on. Thank you so much.

• 29:05Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 29:06Matt McCusker?

  It's such a weird element to it where it's like, you think it's like purely transactional, but it's like, it's all about like how you dress and your flash and then you get them and then, you know, they're just, that's your bitch.

• 29:16Speaker 01

  That's too much anxiety for me.

• 29:17Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, it's crazy. Dude, imagine having not one woman, you were like completely psychologically dominating and abusing, but like seven, and then you have to organize all them and they're together in hotel rooms. You're like, all right, listen up ladies.

• 29:30Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 29:30Matt McCusker?

  Here's the game plan for the day.

• 29:31Speaker 01

  Organizing meals and shit like that, showers, fucking brutal.

• 29:34Speaker 02

  I'd be worried they're gonna like, unionize and shit. That'd be fucking brutal.

• 29:38Matt McCusker?

  I'd be Bezos on them.

• 29:39Speaker 02

  Sending the union buskers. I remember hearing that Walmart had like a team, a private jet, like they had like a team where like, if somebody, we learned it in business in college, that like, if there was a talks of a union at a local store, like the manager had to pick up the phone, call 1-800, like no unions, and a team would assemble, they'd hop on a fucking private jet and fly there that night, that day, and start fucking busting it up. Going, who's doing what? Who's doing what? Get the fuck out of here.

• 30:05Matt McCusker?

  Damn.

• 30:06Speaker 02

  Crazy shit.

• 30:07Matt McCusker?

  Yeesh. Yeah, I know. There was a coffee shop in Philly where the baristas threatened to unionize and the guy just shut down every single one of his coffee shops. It's like, fuck you guys. He's like,

• 30:17Speaker 01

  Is that bad?

• 30:18Matt McCusker?

  The what?

• 30:19Speaker 01

  To unionize or whatever the fuck? Doesn't Starbucks try to do that?

• 30:22Matt McCusker?

  I think they tried to, but it just, you know.

• 30:25Speaker 02

  I, yeah, my family, we, you know, my, everybody has been union construction from Philly, Philly still, I think there's only like eight cities that still have like trade unions.

• 30:33Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 30:34Speaker 02

  It's like Chicago, you know, there's not that many.

• 30:36Matt McCusker?

  Philly's a big union.

• 30:37Speaker 02

  Philly's a big union, proud town. All the men in my family, the cops, firemen are fucking union carpenters, pipe fitters. So it's like, it's really good for the worker. It's not always fantastic for, it's very expensive for that, for the businesses.

• 30:52Matt McCusker?

  For like a labor sweeping up, it's like 500 bucks a day.

• 30:56Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah. Do plus, what it cost you?

• 30:58Matt McCusker?

  Yeah. It's literally like 500 bucks.

• 31:00Speaker 02

  It costs you like, I think to have like a union plumber, like union pipe fitter, a year, it's like minimum 200 and something that it costs you.

• 31:07Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 31:07Speaker 02

  You have to like pay all their benefits, all their union dues, all that.

• 31:10Matt McCusker?

  No, I've seen both sides of it too, because I was always, I worked non-union and then I remember my dad, they were doing demolition. They started getting jobs like in the city. So they were like, you guys gotta be in.

• 31:20Speaker 02

  You gotta be union, yeah.

• 31:21Matt McCusker?

  But then, yeah, so you gotta like, do that a little bit, but then you can do non-union stuff on the side and they'll come like, hey, what the hell's doing this? It's crazy.

• 31:28Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 31:29Matt McCusker?

  Sneaking, sneaking the Guatemalan guys at nighttime.

• 31:31Speaker 02

  They show up, they're like, where, if you're, dude.

• 31:33Matt McCusker?

  Three rooms are cleared out. The guy's like, who the fuck?

• 31:36Speaker 02

  Steve's great.

• 31:37Speaker 01

  So look bad. What the fuck? I got a hot dog here.

• 31:40Matt McCusker?

  It's such a fun, and they'll come out, man. You need like 10 more guys.

• 31:43Speaker 02

  Dude, they do. They send the business agent, business agent shows. If you're like working in Jersey, it's like, oh, you're allowed one guy, but then for every one you bring over, you gotta bring one of their guy. They'll all be like, this looks like a lot of work here, you know? It's always, it's like stereotypically some fat Italian guy who gets out of a Cadillac. And my dad would be like, I'll fistfight you in this acne parking lot, but 100% of the time. My dad, that's the rule number one. My dad goes, they'll walk in, this one guy walked in and started yelling on the job site. My dad goes, can I talk to you outside?

• 32:08Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 32:09Speaker 02

  And the guy go, whoa, whoa, whoa. And he goes, yeah, if we're yelling this much, we're just gonna fight in this parking lot. Like if nobody yells this much and doesn't want to fight. And the guy's like, nah, let's be the way to talk about this.

• 32:18Matt McCusker?

  Be reasonable.

• 32:19Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's like, no, he's like, remove them from his audience. That's how you find out who a tough guy is. And I was like, you're a crazy person.

• 32:24Matt McCusker?

  No, dude, the construction, it's like, uh,

• 32:27Speaker 02

  It is still a huge pissing contest.

• 32:29Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, and it was back in the day, it was very kind of mobbed up. If you, they would come and cut your hydraulic lines and like break your shit.

• 32:35Speaker 01

  Dude, if you like,

• 32:35Matt McCusker?

  Steal the coax cable, shit like that. Yeah, they would fuck you up.

• 32:38Speaker 02

  If you put like, uh, there was a time, probably in the eighties and nineties, if you use like the non-union guys to install the windows of like your storefronts, they would drive a fucking car right through it. Dude, and then they have the rat, they have the big blow up rat.

• 32:52Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 32:53Speaker 02

  And then,

• 32:53Speaker 01

  Love the rat.

• 32:53Matt McCusker?

  I do like the rat.

• 32:54Speaker 02

  Dude, I love, dude, I'm a rat guy. Dude, my,

• 32:57Speaker 01

  What are we doing?

• 32:58Speaker 02

  My uncle George wasn't my uncle, but on my holy communion, my first holy communion party, he had, he had the rat outfit.

• 33:05Matt McCusker?

  Oh.

• 33:05Speaker 02

  Like he was like a diehard union guy.

• 33:07Matt McCusker?

  He was getting ready to go, you're saying?

• 33:08Speaker 02

  I don't know. It was in the trunk. Now that I think about it, it was a white Cadillac.

• 33:11Speaker 01

  No, he didn't have a clown outfit, so he dressed up like the rat for his communion.

• 33:14Speaker 02

  And he showed up at the communion and we were like, yeah, like,

• 33:17Speaker 01

  Never tell on your friends, Kevin.

• 33:19Speaker 02

  Yeah, it was crazy. And thinking back, I'm like, dude, we are just pure dirtbags.

• 33:23Matt McCusker?

  I still, I remember every time I drive by the rat and all the guys sitting out there, I used to love driving by them. Like, get to work, you fucking bum.

• 33:29Speaker 01

  Fuck you, fuck you.

• 33:31Matt McCusker?

  Get to work, you fucking bum.

• 33:32Speaker 01

  I mean, it worked for a minute, right? Didn't it work for a little while in the 50s? It was good?

• 33:37Speaker 02

  I mean, I, yeah, I think, you know, but there's like,

• 33:39Speaker 01

  Paid for Las Vegas?

• 33:39Speaker 02

  I think the other, the other side of the coin from like a business owner's standpoint is like, well, I'm paying for this guy to drive around in a fucking Cadillac. It's like,

• 33:47Matt McCusker?

  Dude, I've, again, it's like, it is a nice thing. When there was like factory fires and we were just like standing on women's necks, like you're not fucking leaving until, that was bad. It is, what I've seen is like, it's very good, but then you get like a bunch, say like electricians, they come in, everyone's making like, you know, whatever, 250, 400, $500 a day. Friday, they come in, they work from like seven to nine, they get coffee for 30 minutes.

• 34:09Speaker 02

  Coffee break.

• 34:10Matt McCusker?

  They go to get lunch and they get hammered for three hours and they come back on Friday like, all right, done wrapping up here.

• 34:15Speaker 02

  Yeah, early quits, dude. Let's wrap it up. Dude, we used to have a saying in my family's, if it ain't done by noon on Friday, it ain't fucking happening. Wrap, that's Monday's problem, dog. Go get a suitcase of beers.

• 34:25Matt McCusker?

  Dude.

• 34:26Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 34:26Matt McCusker?

  You'd see like 10 electricians come in, faces bright red, like, what's up, Mel? What you doing down here, Mel?

• 34:32Speaker 01

  You guys going down to shore?

• 34:33Speaker 02

  Yo, Mo's big. Yo, Mo, yo, cuz. Yo, Mo, yo, cuz.

• 34:36Matt McCusker?

  What's up, cuz?

• 34:36Speaker 02

  I used to, we used to have to give this guy a fucking, uh, one of the, uh, one of our plumbers, I'd let him use my car, my like 2005 Mercury Montego. Cause like, it was always, and they, dude, he would just drive it. He'd come in all fucked up. I'd be like, he'd be like, yeah, let me take you a car. I'm like, I'll use the truck. You take my car to job site. I'll meet you fucking there and we'll swap it out. Dude, every time there'd be just like beer bottles in my backseat and I'd like, dude, I'd be like driving home later that day and like here just clinking. And I'm like, it's either, there was, there was a, there was a union construction worker in like, dude, the one day there was a perk on that, there was just a yellow school bus on the driver's seat. I'm like, dude, you can't be doing this.

• 35:13Speaker 01

  Which is why, when you think about it, the credit card thing isn't that big of a deal.

• 35:17Speaker 02

  Sure. From one drug addict to another.

• 35:19Speaker 01

  That shows that, right, gentlemen? The lesser of two evils. Don't make me get the rat. I'll put the rat in front of the studio.

• 35:27Speaker 02

  Your charges were significantly more than a DUI would have cost me, an open container. I'd easily take that.

• 35:35Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, that, that is, you get shit whenever you're like, well, if you look, because everyone's like, yeah, unions are great. And it's like, it is a nice thing.

• 35:41Speaker 02

  I, I get both sides of it 100%.

• 35:44Matt McCusker?

  You get the reality of it and you're like, I'd be kind of pissed if ever, if half my workforce that I was paying so much were hammered and leaving and,

• 35:51Speaker 02

  But there's also, there's like really good guy, like, you know, if you're like a really good guy, it's, you know, if you're a really good worker, those guys get a job and then keep it for a fucking, for 15, or they go start their company.

• 36:02Matt McCusker?

  They start a non-union company.

• 36:04Speaker 02

  And they start a non-union company.

• 36:06Speaker 01

  This really has me thinking.

• 36:07Matt McCusker?

  Every time.

• 36:08Speaker 02

  Start a non-union podcast.

• 36:11Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 36:11Speaker 01

  We should talk after the podcast. I have some literature you guys want to look at.

• 36:14Speaker 02

  I have a feeling this is gonna, this is gonna cost, this is gonna cost me a lot of money.

• 36:20Speaker 01

  What do you mean?

• 36:20Speaker 02

  I have a feeling this is gonna cost me a lot of money.

• 36:23Matt McCusker?

  Dude, there, we were working,

• 36:24Speaker 02

  Where's Kippy buried? You kill me. I heard you set the 50 yard line of the link.

• 36:28Matt McCusker?

  There, there was, we were working on this place. This episode is brought to you by the Hulu original series Chad Powers starring Glenn Powell. This season, the walls are closing in on Chad's biggest secret. And with his future on the field hanging in the balance, he'll have to win back the one coach who wants nothing to do with him. Watch the new season of Chad Powers, now streaming on Hulu and Hulu on Disney Plus. For bundle subscribers, terms apply. For bundle subscribers, terms apply. Hey, everybody, what's going on? I will be doing standup this weekend in Portland, Maine, and then Boston, Massachusetts. And then September 25th, I'll be in Royal Oaks, Michigan. I'll be in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. I think that's a big one there.

• 37:12Matt McCusker?

  Charlotte, North Carolina, Jacksonville, Florida, Atlanta, Georgia, Chattanooga, Tennessee, Fort Lauderdale, Florida, Tampa, Florida, Orlando, Florida. And this is a big one, guys. This is a big place, Newark, New Jersey. I'll be at the New Jersey Performing Arts Center. Please come to that if you're in the tri-state area. Baltimore, Columbus, Cincinnati, San Diego, and then old Sacramento. Thank you. Oh, go to mattmccusker.com for tickets.

• 37:36Speaker 03

  Hey everybody, it's me, it's LeVar. Please come to I'm from Noctis every first, third Tuesday. And then also I'll be in Indianapolis, October 8th, and then Marion, Illinois, October 10th. And then these shows, please come to my Philadelphia Punchline show. I'll be there for Thanksgiving. Please, please, in panties.

• 37:57Speaker 04

  Yes, Panties in the Mouth Podcast, please listen to Panties in the Mouth Podcast and please listen to my new podcast. It comes out this Thursday, Friday, Hoop and Huddle, the HH Podcast, very excited about it. Please check it out. Thank you, thank you.

• 38:10Speaker 05

  This is Sean Gardini speaking and I'll be in Portland, Oregon and Seattle, Washington this weekend. When you're hearing this, I'll be there in Seattle on Thursday, Portland Friday, Saturday. So please come if you can, sean gardini.com. Thank you. Enjoy the rest of the show.

• 38:29Matt McCusker?

  Remember when they tore down the old porn theater in Philly and it collapsed and like killed somebody?

• 38:32Speaker 02

  What was the name of that?

• 38:34Matt McCusker?

  There was a porn theater right on.

• 38:35Speaker 02

  Fucking non-union dickheads probably in there.

• 38:38Matt McCusker?

  Technically was, yeah. But they, they pulled on it and just collapsed and like killed some. There was a, we were working on the building next to it and it was like a four, four or five story building. And they cut the supports out because they wanted to build like six more stories on top of it. So they had like, they had the, uh, this massive fucking like electrical power box or the circuit box, whatever. Now I'm sounding like a fucking poser. Electrical.

• 39:02Speaker 02

  Take the extension cord out and everything.

• 39:04Speaker 01

  We just talked about unions for the last 20 minutes.

• 39:06Matt McCusker?

  Industrial electrical panel with like the thick copper bus bars. It's not even wires. It's just these hunks of copper and one of the, one of the fucking, apparently one of the IBU's finest came by late at night and tried to break it, like to cut it out to take the copper. It was still live. So it was like 10,000, it was like Jurassic Park fence level. Dude, he got just launched across the basement.

• 39:28Speaker 01

  That's a high.

• 39:29Matt McCusker?

  Got up and just walked out like.

• 39:30Speaker 02

  Oh, no shit.

• 39:32Matt McCusker?

  Cut the power for the whole building.

• 39:33Speaker 01

  Little Narcan, he was fine.

• 39:36Speaker 02

  I've worked with, I've been on the job site with, with electricians and they're just like, or also non-electricians who are like, I'm like, you know, something, let's call the fucking electrician. Cause I'm like sitting there with a plumber who knows how to do like, you know, put in a fucking, you know, cut into, cut into a PVC pipe and put a fucking T in there. Like, and he's like, I think it's dead. And I'm like, we've been working on like a fucking Genardis or something. I'm like, well, let's just walk back to the panel and see if it's all. He goes, I'm pretty sure. And then he's like sitting there with like bolt cutters. And I'm like, dude, I don't know. And I'm backing up because I don't know how electricity works. And he's like.

• 40:10Speaker 01

  Pair of sunglasses.

• 40:11Speaker 02

  And dude, he's multiple times, shout out to Pete, he looked back at me and go, just give my boots to my wife. And then quack, and I'm like, whoa, God, dude.

• 40:19Matt McCusker?

  Dude, I was, uh, I was working for electrician for a while and we were in this building and you know, it's like a, like a three story building with a bunch of different things. They have like a dermatologist on one side, all these different businesses. We were taking out one, but the, I guess the electricity was like kind of connected in these two suites. So I was, we're doing electrical demo, we're just pulling the wires out and I had these little, I just so happened to draw like the little shitty snips that day. So I had these little insulated snips. So I cut, I can only cut half the wire at a time. So I cut through this like thick, that metal like MC wire. I cut half of that and I just see a blue current going through and I go, huh. Cause if you don't, if you can, you can snip one at a time. Cause if you don't connect the circuit or whatever.

• 40:58Speaker 02

  Fuck that. I don't know any of that.

• 41:01Matt McCusker?

  Dude, so I clipped, I clipped the neutral wire. So it wasn't like the, the black one's hot. I clipped the white one and I see like a little circuit is kind of going. I'm going, man, that's weird. So I go to get my foreman. I'm like, yo dude, I think there's a, I think this is still hot. And he was like, it's probably leftover from like when we cut it off. And I was like.

• 41:16Speaker 01

  Quit being a pussy, McCusky.

• 41:17Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, I was like, electricity, there's just like leftover electricity that goes.

• 41:20Speaker 02

  It's not like water sitting in a pipe. And that's, that's from yesterday.

• 41:24Speaker 01

  That's a phantom charge, ball lightning. Don't worry about it. Fuck that.

• 41:29Matt McCusker?

  So I luckily, I'm up on a ladder, I have the, they're insulated, thank God. Cause I'd never, I would've got cooked. So then I go, I cut it, it goes ba-boom, blow, it puts a hole in the metal, blows the insulated snips, it was a big hole. They go flying across the thing, power goes out. There was a, there was a plastic surgeon in there, they lost power too. And he looks at me and he goes, this didn't happen. I'm like, we're the only people in here doing it. It, it happened and we need to figure it out now.

• 41:55Speaker 01

  Get one of the Guatemalan guys.

• 41:59Speaker 01

  That's funny.

• 41:59Matt McCusker?

  It was they like, they were apparently mid procedure and they lost power. Yeah. And he was like, this didn't happen. I'm like, no, this is a problem, dude. You have to deal with this right now.

• 42:08Speaker 01

  Well, fuck that. I would've walked away. He was a credit card down and dipped.

• 42:12Matt McCusker?

  Dude, I would've gotten, if I had non-insulated, I would've gotten thrown off a ladder. I would've fried.

• 42:16Speaker 02

  That was always the worst of like, fuck, I just would fuck up. I'm an idiot. So I'd just fuck up shit on the job, you know? I do stuff wrong and I'd forget. I have my, did they say do this or do that? It was always, my dad was my boss.

• 42:26Matt McCusker?

  And you had to ask questions. Third question to your dad is no more shame of law.

• 42:31Speaker 02

  What'd I fucking tell you?

• 42:33Matt McCusker?

  Read the blueprints, like, I can't.

• 42:35Speaker 02

  Dude, I don't know the scale.

• 42:38Speaker 01

  That's the way he is now with the podcast.

• 42:41Speaker 01

  Fucking blue.

• 42:43Matt McCusker?

  Dude, go to my truck, on the third panel, there's a blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, okay, back there is like, fuck, fuck, fuck, where the fuck is it? Fuck. Come back. Oh dad, I couldn't find the request. He's like, wah.

• 42:54Speaker 02

  We'd be on the roof putting in fucking units and you'd be like run downstairs and get my fucking channel locks and my seven, 18s fucking wonky deuce.

• 43:03Speaker 02

  I gotta walk across the roof of this fucking warehouse, climb down, get the four ladders. I get out to the truck and I go, I can't find it. So now I gotta go back with nothing. I couldn't find a wonky deuce, you know? And he's like, they're fucking right next to the other wonky deuce. I'm like, Jesus Christ.

• 43:19Speaker 01

  I remember handing a contractor the drill the wrong way, like handing it to him like.

• 43:23Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 43:25Speaker 01

  Fuck you. Give me your credit card.

• 43:28Matt McCusker?

  This episode is brought to you by Quince. Nice. What do you know about Quince? I love Quince. I'll be, I'll be honest. They sent me the stuff and I, they're boxers. They use like cotton, like regular materials, not a lot of polyesters. Natural fibers. I'm a big fan. Well, not everyone wants to spend forever on the perfect look. Quince gets that. It's why they make staple pieces for your wardrobe that go with pretty much anything that they're, uh, they're really easy to style and they feel great to wear because they're also made with premium materials, including like you said, organic cotton, merino wool. There's even a hundred percent Mongolian cashmere sweaters, starting at just $60. That's, I mean, talk about a deal. It's pretty crazy. That's a bargain.

• 44:10Matt McCusker?

  Find your next fall favorites at Quince. Download the Quince app for app exclusive offers or go to quince.com. Get free shipping on your order and 365 day returns now available in Canada and the UK too. And when Quince asks you where you heard about them, let them know it was Matt and Shane's secret podcast. It's the best way to support the show. This episode is brought to you by NutraFol. Okay. You're a fool. Nutri you. I pity the NutraFol. NutraFol. NutraFol is the number one dermatologist recommended hair growth supplement brand and it's the number one hair growth supplement brand personally used by dermatologists.

• 44:49Matt McCusker?

  Because hair health isn't one size fits all. NutraFol offers different formulas for both men and women at any age or stage of life. It's 100% vegan, biotin free and comes in a smaller capsule size to make your daily routine easier. I can't get enough of this stuff. See thicker, stronger, faster growing hair with less shedding in just three to six months. Right now, NutraFol is offering our listeners $10 off your first month subscription, free shipping when you visit nutraful.com and enter promo code MSSP. That's nutraful.com, spelled N-U-T-R-A-F-O-L.com, promo code MSSP. I do remember though, because I, I grew up working on construction sites. I never advanced from like basic helper.

• 45:34Speaker 02

  No, no, dude, I can hold this shit. I can carry shit. I can hold a light. We use the term, I use a good extra set of hands. I was a good extra set of hands.

• 45:42Matt McCusker?

  My dad would hit me with, he's like, I need you from the neck down today. That's all. Just carry shit. Cause I'd be like, well, why don't we do this? He would just go, hey man, turn it off. I need you from here down.

• 45:51Speaker 02

  Can we set that? I said one time, I've been trying to set that up for you. You, you just refused to do it. I keep going, I, my dad would go, I go, I would do something. I go, I thought. And he goes, I'm not paying you to think. And I went, dude, that's so true. I should, I'm not in a thinking role, man. I'm in a carrying shit role. I'm not here to fucking refine the process. I'm just here to carry shit. That's it.

• 46:18Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, that was it. It was your, it was a pure body.

• 46:21Speaker 02

  The height of my accomplishments was we were setting units on a, I was doing shit that I shouldn't have been doing legally, union, everything wise.

• 46:29Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 46:30Speaker 02

  And we were like a two man crew trying to set units with a crane on a fucking building. And my dad's got a set though. My dad.

• 46:41Speaker 02

  My dad's setting or whatever.

• 46:43Speaker 01

  Who's running the crane?

• 46:45Speaker 02

  The crane guy, but they pull up, they go, hey, they're here. Like we're in and out. That's like a cement truck. They're like, dude, I got seven more.

• 46:51Matt McCusker?

  Let's go.

• 46:51Speaker 02

  I'm not, we're not, this isn't like.

• 46:52Matt McCusker?

  They're like $5,000.

• 46:56Matt McCusker?

  Let's go.

• 46:56Speaker 02

  So my dad goes, you gotta fucking, because you couldn't see, he had to go, we had to go like 20 feet in and my dad had to.

• 47:03Matt McCusker?

  Were you giving the signals?

• 47:04Speaker 02

  Oh dude, talk about tense.

• 47:06Speaker 01

  Like a third base.

• 47:08Matt McCusker?

  No, you really do.

• 47:09Speaker 02

  Dude, up, down, hold. And I'm like, dude, that was me being called into the, to close out the world series, dude. You couldn't tell me shit. I was at the bar with my boys that day. Go, round it up.

• 47:24Speaker 02

  Drink some meat today, boys. Yeah, it was fucking.

• 47:28Matt McCusker?

  Nothing better than being a boy and being like, hold.

• 47:30Speaker 02

  Hold dude, holding someone? That's operator shit, dude. Fuck yeah. Hold, oh.

• 47:36Speaker 01

  Being point on a SEAL team.

• 47:37Speaker 02

  Dude, and tapping on the back of a truck to let them know they're all good to go. Suck my dick, dude. You loaded up? You're a good guy. It's like sending someone off in an ambulance.

• 47:49Speaker 01

  Yelling at somebody to back up a little more like, come on, you got it. You got three feet.

• 47:52Speaker 02

  When you know how much they got, you get upset. You got it. Did I say stuff?

• 47:59Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 47:59Speaker 02

  That's all. I just wanna be in the, I don't wanna be doing this shit. I just wanna be.

• 48:02Matt McCusker?

  Construction is so fun.

• 48:04Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's great, dude.

• 48:05Matt McCusker?

  It's so fucking fun.

• 48:06Speaker 02

  It's great.

• 48:07Speaker 01

  I never get with the lunches. Looking back, I should have not ate the way I did.

• 48:10Speaker 02

  No, we weren't allowed to eat.

• 48:12Speaker 01

  Six hot dogs at like eleven o'clock.

• 48:14Matt McCusker?

  Standard diet.

• 48:15Speaker 01

  In the middle of winter.

• 48:16Matt McCusker?

  Dude, my, my dad's.

• 48:17Speaker 01

  Sitting in the truck for a half an hour, listening to KYW.

• 48:20Matt McCusker?

  He's been hitting like cheesesteaks for lunch. Cheesesteaks and pizza for lunch for like forty-five years.

• 48:25Speaker 02

  That's crazy.

• 48:26Matt McCusker?

  I, he gets ice cream on the way home, just.

• 48:28Speaker 02

  Chow to it.

• 48:29Matt McCusker?

  Munches.

• 48:30Speaker 01

  And it would work. It wouldn't affect him.

• 48:32Matt McCusker?

  He's got a pretty severe type two diabetes.

• 48:36Speaker 01

  I'd have half a tasty cake. I'd be fucking done. I'll see you guys on Monday.

• 48:42Speaker 01

  Fuck that.

• 48:44Matt McCusker?

  Nah, it's so, yeah, construction is, it was the funniest, funniest way to like work as a child. Cause then I try to like, I went to college and I went into an office finally for the first time. And I was, I remember being in an office, I was in, like I shared with one guy and I was coming back from like the weekend and being like, dude, so I got my fucking head this, and the lady boss came in and was like, whoa, excuse me. She's like, you cannot be talking like this.

• 49:05Speaker 01

  What'd you say? You got a head?

• 49:06Matt McCusker?

  I was talking about getting head. I was in the office, like, yeah, so I got my dick sucked.

• 49:09Speaker 01

  Got a wild wind this weekend. What'd you boys do? Jesus Christ.

• 49:13Matt McCusker?

  I for, I wasn't even trying to be funny. I was just talking about getting my dick sucked, like it's, it's the first thing in the morning. I gotta recap any sexual conquest. I'm gonna do this and I'm gonna be racist after this. I'm like, I'm just hitting all the beats.

• 49:24Speaker 02

  I'm gonna sit on a bucket for a little bit.

• 49:25Speaker 01

  That's fucking awesome.

• 49:27Matt McCusker?

  And the lady was like, excuse, I never worked with a woman. She was like, excuse me. And I was like, whoa, what's up? What's up, toots?

• 49:32Speaker 01

  Were you dry all week? Were you dry all weekend, honey? What's the fucking problem, huh? Nobody topped you off? Jesus.

• 49:38Matt McCusker?

  Were you driving a lunch truck?

• 49:43Matt McCusker?

  I feel, I went to all boys high school and then I worked only with guys, pretty much.

• 49:47Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's fucking recipe for disaster.

• 49:52Speaker 01

  You skanks have a good weekend, huh?

• 49:55Speaker 02

  Dude, I left my family's company, I, cause me and my brother were fighting. I was just like, I gotta, I'm like, we got, and it just started fist fighting like.

• 50:01Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 50:01Speaker 02

  Bi-monthly. And I'm like, this is too much pressure. Yeah. Like, there's no money.

• 50:05Matt McCusker?

  We haven't done that.

• 50:05Speaker 02

  The business was, the business was tank, like it was, everything was just going bad. It was tough. I'm like, I gotta get the fuck out of here. So I went and I got an office job at a law firm, just like doing accounting.

• 50:15Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 50:16Speaker 02

  Entry level, like fucking twelve dollars an hour. And I remember having to wait to stand in line to clock out. Like we couldn't clock out till five o'clock and we were all like lined up at four fifty-nine and they came in, they go, everybody sit down till five, no lining up. I remember texting my brother, like, dude, this, don't, you gotta stay the course, man. This shit's not for us. We're not, we're not, this ain't for guys like us, dude. Can't do it. We're not waiting line kinda guys. You know what I mean?

• 50:41Matt McCusker?

  No, that was my dad's whole thing. He was like, go to school, you work where there's air conditioning.

• 50:45Speaker 02

  Dude, my dad said the same thing. That's why we did supermarkets.

• 50:48Matt McCusker?

  That was my only life goal, was to get me AC.

• 50:50Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 50:50Speaker 01

  You got a seventy in here. What the fuck? You forgot your roots?

• 50:55Speaker 02

  Guys worried about his plants, dude. This guy, this guy went soul.

• 50:58Speaker 01

  Sweating down here.

• 51:00Matt McCusker?

  That was his only life advice. He's like, bro, work in air conditioning. It's so much better.

• 51:04Speaker 02

  I remember my dad giving us a speech of like, you know, somebody wanted to go take another, one of our guys wanted to take, got like an offer to go to another job. He goes, I don't know why you wanna go out there. They're breaking ground. You're doing that shit in the winter, you're doing that shit in the summer. We work in supermarket. Like we were like, and he's like, it's, it's hot, it's cold, it's hot during the winter, it's cold during the summer. What more do you need? Plus you got lunch right there.

• 51:23Speaker 01

  The devil you know.

• 51:23Matt McCusker?

  He's right. He's completely right.

• 51:25Speaker 02

  He's locked in. For a guy who's like, I'm gonna be, alright, I'm a pipe fitter.

• 51:28Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 51:28Speaker 02

  I'm eighteen, I'm a pipe fitter. What lane do I wanna go in?

• 51:32Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 51:32Speaker 02

  And it's like, find a place where you're working inside, not working at fucking.

• 51:36Speaker 01

  Air conditioning, get your dick sucked down to shore. Let's go.

• 51:39Matt McCusker?

  Beautiful.

• 51:40Speaker 02

  Early quits on Friday.

• 51:44Speaker 01

  Percocets on the floor.

• 51:44Speaker 02

  Wanna knock off early today, boys?

• 51:46Matt McCusker?

  Dude, I remember, it's so funny cause I'm like thinking of it like it's boyhood. I was like twenty-six, working for my dad.

• 51:51Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah.

• 51:52Matt McCusker?

  Outside and it was, we, I had the like the full bodied Carhartt with like a hat, gloves.

• 51:56Speaker 02

  Couldn't tell you shit.

• 51:57Matt McCusker?

  Had all the warm gear I could possibly get. We'd get there and it'd still be dark in the morning and I would just be cold.

• 52:03Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 52:04Matt McCusker?

  Like I, it just, it wasn't enough. So I would just be like, for like three, and then the sun would finally like come up and I'd be like, oh, fuck.

• 52:10Speaker 01

  Your lips are all chapped, your skin's dry as shit.

• 52:14Speaker 02

  That acceptance of like, I'm just like, this is my reality for the next six hours. This is just, I'm just gonna be cold. We would sleep in, we'd, we'd do overnights. So we'd go to, we, you know, we'd have to be there ten PM and then work overnight, like digging, you know, we'd have to cut the fucking floor out of a supermarket, dig, expose the fucking main, cut the main, tie in. And you, as you're there, you'd hope the fucking, the night crew who's there stocking shelves, would, somebody would take a shit and then you'd be in a hole and the fucking turd would just come down. You're like, this fuck sucks, dude. So you'd make the tie in, you'd make the tie in, you'd be six feet down in a hole and someone's like flush and like try to get out. It's like someone threw a hand grenade in.

• 52:56Matt McCusker?

  Oh.

• 52:57Speaker 02

  And then we'd like sleep in the car, waiting for the fucking inspector to come.

• 53:00Speaker 01

  That sleep was so good though.

• 53:02Speaker 02

  Yeah, it was.

• 53:02Speaker 01

  In a warm truck, KYW playing.

• 53:05Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, that's nice. Snow shoveling was the best.

• 53:08Speaker 02

  Ah, dude.

• 53:09Speaker 01

  You?

• 53:10Speaker 02

  Dude, it was me, my stepdad was driving the plow. I was in the middle. My brother was to the right and that was the first time he let me crank heaters in front of him. Dude, the three of us in like a nineteen eighty-nine fucking, I think it was like a Bronco. And just crushing heaters.

• 53:22Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, we used to.

• 53:22Speaker 01

  Did you drive the plow?

• 53:24Matt McCusker?

  Hmm? I never drove the plow.

• 53:25Speaker 01

  Never got there.

• 53:25Speaker 02

  He's extra set of hands.

• 53:26Speaker 01

  It was never gonna happen.

• 53:27Matt McCusker?

  I was, I was shovel, but.

• 53:28Speaker 02

  You were a surgeon with that thing.

• 53:30Matt McCusker?

  Dude, it was also, he, it was all, it was high school. So, and depending on how much, if it was over a foot of snow, you would get like emergency or state of emergency rates. Yeah. So you would get like, and we'd get like twenty bucks an hour in cash and we would just be out all night. The, the guy would come, just drop MGD in the snow. So we'd keep beers cold in the snow. So he would just give us beers and we would just smoke weed and drink beer and just shovel condominium complexes. And it was just like, and then in the end, we'd lay in the house and just eat pizza and get so high and like, this is the best.

• 53:58Speaker 01

  Hot chat.

• 53:58Speaker 02

  I just made fucking four hundred dollars.

• 54:01Speaker 01

  Yeah, I'm gonna blow it in two hours.

• 54:03Speaker 02

  It's gone.

• 54:05Speaker 01

  You hear that, you young kids?

• 54:06Speaker 02

  I got a QP on the way.

• 54:10Speaker 01

  Finally get a QP. It's amazing.

• 54:12Speaker 02

  Shout out to, the second your boys could get a QP, I was like, you, you hit another, another level of adulthood.

• 54:18Speaker 01

  You said this the other day, which finally sunk into me. I've spent every dollar I've ever made in my life.

• 54:23Speaker 02

  Isn't that awesome? That's crazy. He's been working, I go, you've been working for forty years and you haven't saved one.

• 54:30Matt McCusker?

  Kind of.

• 54:30Speaker 02

  That's a, that's a hundred percent efficiency.

• 54:32Matt McCusker?

  It's kinda nice. That's how you keep the economy fucking moving.

• 54:34Speaker 01

  There you go. What are you talking about?

• 54:37Matt McCusker?

  You're a man of the people.

• 54:38Speaker 01

  It's a lesson to you kids out there.

• 54:40Matt McCusker?

  It's these kids' problem.

• 54:41Speaker 01

  You don't want a chance at a win, do you?

• 54:42Matt McCusker?

  That's these kids' problem. They don't wanna spend money. That's a problem.

• 54:44Speaker 02

  That is.

• 54:44Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, you gotta spend four million, you gotta spend.

• 54:46Speaker 02

  You gotta spend money to make money, dude.

• 54:47Matt McCusker?

  You gotta spend four million dollars on a house. That's what it is.

• 54:51Matt McCusker?

  You wanna get four bedroom colonial? Four point five million dollars in your parents' neighborhood.

• 54:56Matt McCusker?

  The houses, houses, dude, houses are crazy. Crazy. If you wanna get a house, like we were looking outside of Philly, in like the suburbs of Philadelphia.

• 55:04Speaker 01

  Don't forget it.

• 55:05Matt McCusker?

  Every fucking house was a million.

• 55:07Speaker 02

  It's a million dollars.

• 55:08Matt McCusker?

  A million dollars.

• 55:09Speaker 01

  Yeah, fuck that.

• 55:09Matt McCusker?

  I was like, buh, it's insane. I mean, it's like, obviously not every single house, but like.

• 55:13Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. When you, it gets to the point where you're like, okay, if I want this size and like the kind of this okay, even like okayish condition.

• 55:21Matt McCusker?

  Dude, I remember hearing a house for six hundred grand and being like, it's a mansion.

• 55:24Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 55:25Matt McCusker?

  Six hundred grand now.

• 55:25Speaker 01

  Go to Venezuela, get something like that down there. Nice.

• 55:28Speaker 02

  Yeah, I, yeah, I remember my dad's house.

• 55:30Matt McCusker?

  What'd you say?

• 55:31Speaker 01

  So go to Venezuela.

• 55:33Matt McCusker?

  It's where women respect men more too.

• 55:35Speaker 01

  Start running yak, you know?

• 55:37Speaker 02

  Tradewise.

• 55:37Matt McCusker?

  True. Yeah. Become passport bros. But yeah, it's, yeah, the housing market's fucking crazy. And I, I've heard there's so many baby boomers that we have a housing market set up for like a population that's eventually gonna dip off. So we're gonna, we're gonna eventually have way more houses than we need.

• 55:55Speaker 01

  Nice. They don't wanna give them up.

• 55:56Matt McCusker?

  No.

• 55:57Speaker 02

  Not now, there's still a premium on them.

• 55:59Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, now's a premium, but when all the baby boomers croak, there's gonna be like a surplus. The population's gonna dip.

• 56:04Speaker 02

  Does that, well, I thought the baby, didn't the baby boomers have kids? So it's like, and then we're not having kids.

• 56:09Matt McCusker?

  They had less kids than they had and we had less kids than they had.

• 56:12Speaker 02

  Yeah, I know. That's, that's above my pay grade. I'm, I'm an extra set of hands, dude.

• 56:15Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 56:17Speaker 01

  I'm below the that guy.

• 56:18Matt McCusker?

  I think people will fill in those houses though, for sure. I think we'll get people coming in.

• 56:22Speaker 02

  Yeah, I don't, uh, that, that's, that's, any sort of macro level issue.

• 56:28Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 56:29Speaker 02

  I can't wrap my head around.

• 56:30Matt McCusker?

  No, it's pretty tough.

• 56:31Speaker 02

  I just like got myself on a budget and I'm like the proudest I've ever been. Like genuinely, I'm like, this is crazy.

• 56:38Speaker 01

  I just started making my bed.

• 56:40Matt McCusker?

  I still can't make my.

• 56:41Speaker 02

  Nah, that's crazy talk.

• 56:43Matt McCusker?

  Nah, every now and again, my wife will catch me in the morning like, can you grab the other side? Yeah.

• 56:47Speaker 01

  Oh, that fitted sheet. Fucking blow my brain.

• 56:50Matt McCusker?

  Dude, mine comes off every night. I gotta yank it with all my strength. I yank it and I still can't get it out of the bed.

• 56:55Speaker 01

  It's fucking nuts.

• 56:56Matt McCusker?

  Yeah, I'll, I'll make a bed with her like once a month. We should start doing this every morning.

• 57:00Speaker 01

  They really love that. Make a bed, they love it.

• 57:02Matt McCusker?

  They love to make a bed. Love a made bed.

• 57:05Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 57:06Speaker 02

  Making a bed Sunday night, my wife will be like, well, I did the laundry and then it's like, we don't, you know, so do the laundry at noon, but then like it will, something I had, so you know, we go ask something and it's like nine o'clock and you're like putting a duvet cover on and I'm like, fuck this. I fuck it. I wanna, I'm, we're moving tomorrow. This house sucks. I hate everything.

• 57:24Matt McCusker?

  It's on the wrong side. I'm like, I'm gonna jump out the fucking window.

• 57:27Speaker 01

  Ian's basement looks so bad, doesn't it, huh?

• 57:29Speaker 02

  We just did it. Her parents are in town, they're staying in the guest room and I'm looking at the fucking, I'm like, she's like, I'm like, let me just see where the bottom is. She's like, it's this side. I go, let me just, I gotta see for myself. Cause if we start fucking, I can't trust you. You give me bad info in the past. I can't go, I can't go to battle with this info you give me. I have to know. Cause if we get it halfway on and it's not, we're gonna get a divorce. Cause I'm gonna lose my shit. I gotta fuck, I gotta know.

• 57:52Matt McCusker?

  So we have to fit this blanket inside of this other blanket. It's like, how? How the fuck are we doing it?

• 57:57Speaker 02

  The duvet.

• 57:57Matt McCusker?

  The duvet.

• 57:57Speaker 02

  It's crazy. That's new. And that new, but like, we were a comforter. I never did this.

• 58:02Matt McCusker?

  A down comforter. Never seen a duvet in my life.

• 58:04Speaker 02

  Never.

• 58:04Matt McCusker?

  It's, it's ridic, I'll just, you don't have to wash your blanket.

• 58:07Speaker 01

  And the ruffle thing that goes on the bottom of the, on the box.

• 58:10Speaker 02

  I thought that was a duvet. The beds, yeah. I buy, my, my girlfriend, my girlfriend, my wife's like, this broad on board my side piece.

• 58:22Speaker 02

  She's like, she started saying duvet and I'm like, my, my whole life, I thought a duvet up until like thirty-four.

• 58:27Matt McCusker?

  Was that?

• 58:28Speaker 02

  Was the bed skirt.

• 58:29Matt McCusker?

  Yeah.

• 58:29Speaker 02

  And I'm like, oh yeah, I've never had a duvet.

• 58:31Matt McCusker?

  No, it's, it's a thing now. Everyone has a fucking blanket case.

• 58:34Speaker 01

  No, a regular down comforter by itself is the best.

• 58:37Matt McCusker?

  I'm talking about.

• 58:38Speaker 01

  Nice and cool between your legs, knocking the fuck out.

• 58:42Matt McCusker?

  It's the best.

• 58:43Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 58:45Matt McCusker?

  Well dudes, thank you for coming, man.

• 58:47Speaker 02

  Thanks. Thanks for having us, buddy.

• 58:48Matt McCusker?

  So fun, man.

• 58:49Speaker 02

  Appreciate you.

• 58:49Matt McCusker?

  And dude, the specials on YouTube?

• 58:50Speaker 02

  Specials on YouTube, American garbage.

• 58:52Matt McCusker?

  Is it out right now?

• 58:53Speaker 02

  It's out, probably. I don't know when this is coming out, but probably this, it drops.

• 58:56Speaker 01

  Tomorrow.

• 58:57Speaker 02

  Oh no, it's drops, uh, this Sunday then. Great, yeah.

• 58:59Matt McCusker?

  Perfect.

• 59:00Speaker 02

  This Sunday night, we're doing a live from here on our YouTube channel. If you've never checked out our podcast, check out Are You Garbage?

• 59:04Matt McCusker?

  It's the best.

• 59:05Speaker 02

  Um, you know, we've had Shane twice. We've had you twice, some of our best fucking episodes. Check it out.

• 59:10Matt McCusker?

  Dude, we'll, uh, yeah, we'll link it in there. Can we link the link now? Is it one of those things on YouTube where you can like link it to like, hey, watch out?

• 59:15Speaker 02

  I can get it to you. Yeah, I think so. Yeah, we'll figure it out.

• 59:18Speaker 01

  That's an above the neck question.

• 59:19Speaker 02

  Yeah, we'll have all the nerds handle it. We'll have, we'll have this crack team of fucking producers handle it.

• 59:25Speaker 01

  I get you sandwiches if you want.

• 59:27Speaker 02

  The guys who are for sure splitting a QP later today.

• 59:31Speaker 01

  Showing up in three cars ten minutes later. I love it.

• 59:34Matt McCusker?

  Thank you guys.

• 59:35Speaker 02

  Thank you, buddy. We love you. Love it.

• 59:36Matt McCusker?

  See you, boys. Watch new episodes of Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast on Spotify. Do it.

• 59:47Speaker 05

  Does checking your bank statements feel like digging through a dusty attic full of forgotten subscriptions and old free trials?

• 59:57Speaker 05

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• 1:00:17Speaker 06

  This is US Bank's Cozy Cash Formations with your chief financial playmaker, Fernando Mendoza. You are worthy of financial security. Budgeting is not restriction, it's freedom. You are smart. You are capable. You are giving your money a purpose. You are learning the language of saving, of growing. Now streaming. Member FDIC. Copyright twenty twenty-six US Bank.