Big Sean ON: Why Self-Care Isn't Selfish & How to Find Balance in Any Relationship

You can order my new book 8 RULES OF LOVE at 8rulesoflove.com or at a retail store near you. You can also get the chance to see me live on my first ever world tour. This is a 90 minute interactive show where I will take you on a journey of finding, keeping and even letting go of love. Head to jayshettytour.com and find out if I'll be in a city near you. Thank you so much for all your support - I hope to see you soon. Jay Shetty sits down with Big Sean to talk about personal growth and dealing with relationships. In order to be of service to others, we all need to take care of our needs first. This is why self-care is something you owe to yourself, it is something you deserve in any way, shape, and form. And when you master self-care, you become better at handling your emotions, you get more invested in your relationships, and you become more aware of the things that truly make you fulfilled and happy. Big Sean is a popular American rapper. He has won several awards including the ‘MTV Music Awards’, and ‘BET Awards’ over the course of his career. He cites stars like Eminem and Kanye West as his inspirations and has released a total of four music albums till date. Big Sean, in collaboration with rapper and producer Hit-Boy released an EP entitled What You Expect in October 2021. Want to be a Jay Shetty Certified Life Coach? Get the Digital Guide and Workbook from Jay Shetty https://jayshettypurpose.com/fb-getting-started-as-a-life-coach-podcast/ Do you want to meditate daily with me? Go to go.calm.com/onpurpose to get 40% off a Calm Premium Membership. Experience the Daily Jay. Only on Calm What We Discuss: 00:00 Intro 04:57 Most of the external things start internally 13:24 Be open to other possibilities and options 16:35 How often do you practice gratitude? 25:29 Self care is the opposite of being selfish 32:10 A shift in mindset can totally change our perspective 40:06 When you’re rich even without money 44:45 Approach everything with happiness within you 52:00 We don’t give ourselves permission for things we don't deserve 53:13 You have to listen to yourself 56:50 How can you serve others? 01:00:25 Clear the blockages within you 01:06:00 Balancing the distance in your relationship 01:15:41 Find someone who you can exchange the same energy with 01:23:09 Don’t give up on yourself Episode Resources Big Sean | Instagram Big Sean | Twitter Big Sean | YouTube Big Sean | Facebook Big Sean | Website Don Life See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Jay Shetty?

  This episode is brought to you by Orange Theory Fitness. One of the best investments you can make is in your own strength. The choices you make today can help shape how you feel for years to come. Orange Theory Fitness provides a one-hour workout to build strength, burn fat, and build muscle with an expert coach guiding you every step of the way. Head to orangetheory.com/onpurpose to learn more and get your first class free. Orange Theory Fitness, helping people live longer, more vibrant lives. Terms and conditions apply. See webpage and studio for details. This episode is brought to you by AG1. Are you feeling September reset too? Shorter days, longer to-do lists, earlier alarms, all those routines you promised yourself you'd pick back up.

• 0:45Jay Shetty?

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• 1:24Jay Shetty?

  For a limited time, save 20% on your first subscription order of AG1 Next Gen or AG1 Pro at drinkag1.com/onpurpose. That's drinkag1.com/onpurpose. This episode is brought to you by AG1. Are you feeling September reset too? Shorter days, longer to-do lists, earlier alarms, all those routines you promised yourself you'd pick back up. It can feel like your whole life is recalibrating. And when everything around you is changing, it helps to have a few things you can rely on. AG1 Next Gen is one of those easy habits to keep. It's the clinically backed, comprehensive daily health drink that supports your gut

• 2:09Jay Shetty?

  health, energy production, and foundational nutrition all in one scoop. AG1's ingredients are sourced from quality partners for absorption, potency, and nutrient density to deliver the foundational nutrition your body needs. And alongside a proper diet, AG1 Next Gen meets 94% of nutrient requirements and is clinically shown to enrich the gut microbiome. For a limited time, save 20% on your first subscription order of AG1 Next Gen or AG1 Pro at drinkag1.com/onpurpose. That's drinkag1.com/onpurpose. Hey, I don't often do this, but I'm gonna give you a note on how to listen to this episode.

• 2:55Jay Shetty?

  I've never done this before, but I had to do it because of how powerful everything Shaun said was. The first thing is, watch out for the subtleties of what Shaun is saying. Everything he's saying is experience, it's realization, so you have to look out for the subtlety. Don't just go, "Oh yeah, I know that, I kind of have heard that," or... No, no, no, it's focus on the subtlety of the application. That's step one for listening to this podcast. The second thing is have fun while you listen to it. Appreciate it, love it, let it flow, but definitely look out for the subtleties. I hope you enjoyed this episode.

• 3:35Jay Shetty?

  Hey, everyone, welcome back to On Purpose, the number one health podcast in the world. Thanks to each and every single one of you that come back every week to listen, learn, and grow, investing in your mental health, investing in your mental fitness, investing in your relationships, that's why you show up. And you know that one of my favorite things is listening to your comments, reading your reviews, and trying to figure out what resonated with you. I'm on Twitter, watching what you're tweeting, I'm on Instagram stories, seeing what you're tagging, and I am so excited to be talking to you today. I can't believe it. My new book, Eight Rules of Love, is out and I cannot wait to share it with you.

• 4:17Jay Shetty?

  I am so, so excited for you to read this book, for you to listen to this book. I read the audiobook. If you haven't got it already, make sure you go to eight rules of love dot com. It's dedicated to anyone who's trying to find, keep, or let go of love. So if you've got friends that are dating, broken up, or struggling with love, make sure you grab this book. And I'd love to invite you to come and see me for my global tour, Love Rules. Go to jayshettytour.com to learn more information about tickets, VIP experiences, and more. I can't wait to see you this year. And today's episode is a special gift from our guest and myself to you

• 5:00Jay Shetty?

  because I don't think we've had an episode that has had more requests for a part two than today's guest, and that is not an understatement. This is the most requested part two that we've ever had on on purpose in the last three years.

• 5:16Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 5:17Jay Shetty?

  And the guest is none other than my dear friend, someone that I met for the first time on the podcast last time. Not only did that couple of hours create a deep, lasting friendship since, it's created this desire to serve together, to have a brotherhood together, to create impact together. It's none other than my dear friend, incredibly talented, someone who needs no professional introduction, Big Sean. People have been waiting, crying, asking for this.

• 5:49Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 5:49Jay Shetty?

  And you've been so generous and kind. We've been talking about this ever since we did the first episode.

• 5:54Big Sean?

  Yeah, we needed to do part two. It's been like on our, it's been on our to do list, you know?

• 5:59Jay Shetty?

  Absolutely, and we're doing it. And I just, I just want to let people know, like off screen, like, you know, I knew you were deep before you came to the show last time. I knew that you were a deep thinker. You worked on yourself. You have this incredible relationship with your mom, who's influenced you so deeply.

• 6:16Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 6:16Jay Shetty?

  But I didn't realize just how much of a brotherhood we were gonna have.

• 6:20Big Sean?

  Right.

• 6:21Jay Shetty?

  And what a connection we were gonna have.

• 6:22Big Sean?

  Right, right.

• 6:23Jay Shetty?

  And I didn't realize that how much people were gonna love seeing us together. When I saw the response, and you felt it too, right?

• 6:30Big Sean?

  Yeah, of course. I felt it like the people who are into me were just, you know, blown like the interview, the whole interview. It's the only interview that I've been out in public and people like, "Yo, I saw the Jay Shetty interview." Like, "I saw, I heard the interview, I saw the podcast." Like, literally, every other time I go somewhere, you know, somebody approaches me like that. So the impact is unbelievable, you know, that's what we do it for, right? And since I came and linked up with you, we've had dinner at your house and me, you, Janae, your wife, we all have just been like kicking it. So it's cool to, it's cool to deliver part two. I feel like it's needed and necessary, you know?

• 7:09Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, and part two means there'll be a part three and a part four, so we'll keep going. So there's no, no limit, but yeah, I want to thank you for just, you know, saying that because even your community that I got to connect with because of the show.

• 7:21Big Sean?

  Yeah, for sure.

• 7:22Jay Shetty?

  Your fans and your audience are incredible. Like, I just saw this whole new group of people connect with my work because of you, through you.

• 7:30Big Sean?

  Yeah, and vice versa, too.

• 7:32Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, and I was just like, I didn't realize that all these people would, would care about the things I'm talking about. And so I want to thank you, I want to thank your community, I want to thank your audience, who just showed me so much love, who they may not have even known who I was, but thanks to you.

• 7:45Big Sean?

  They're on a mission, they're on a mission to be better, you know?

• 7:47Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 7:48Big Sean?

  They're on a mission to work on themselves and the whole world is going through so much right now. It's crazy, you know, so that's one of the things I've been focusing on. I've just been like really focusing on mastering myself more, still putting time into myself. Just trying to be the silence and still in amongst the, the noise and the chaos. And then when things are still and stagnant, to know when it's time to move, you know? I'm really trying to find that balance. It's like the yin and the yang and how there's like a little dot of each in the parts of the yin and yang. It's like, that's what my life is trying to been, like, trying to be the stillness in the chaos and the movement and trying to be the movement in the stagnation of things, you know?

• 8:32Jay Shetty?

  I love that. Trying to be the stillness in the movement and trying to be the movement in the stillness. And are you saying external or internal? Like, how are, how are you learning to watch that?

• 8:43Big Sean?

  Well, it's both, right? So it's like the external and the internal are so connected, right? So I just have been realizing that it, it, most of the things that are external start internally, right? So that's what I use, it starts with internal. That's why I start my day with meditation, you know? And the fact that we went through so many meditations last time we, we met up, man, that was so helpful because I learned. I meditate every morning and I like to ask you like what does meditation do for you like when you do it?

• 9:10Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 9:10Big Sean?

  What does it do for you?

• 9:11Jay Shetty?

  There's, there's, as we did last time, so I'm trying to figure out which ones everyone's gonna see first, but either way,

• 9:18Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 9:19Jay Shetty?

  Big Sean and I did a brilliant men's health collab to talk about the power of wellness and meditation.

• 9:25Big Sean?

  Right.

• 9:26Jay Shetty?

  It was historic because it was the first time men's health are doing a train like me, but based on meditation.

• 9:33Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 9:33Jay Shetty?

  Ever. It's always been physical.

• 9:35Big Sean?

  Right.

• 9:35Jay Shetty?

  And so me and you got to do this.

• 9:36Big Sean?

  Isn't that cool, man?

• 9:37Jay Shetty?

  It's so cool. We're gonna do it together.

• 9:38Big Sean?

  Yeah, crazy.

• 9:39Jay Shetty?

  And so I love that and you know, we worked on that together and I have three different types of meditation. So one type of meditation, breath work is for my body.

• 9:48Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 9:49Jay Shetty?

  So if I'm feeling like my body's tired or I'm feeling like my body needs energy or my body needs to relax, I practice breath work.

• 9:57Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 9:57Jay Shetty?

  I then do visualization. So if I'm going into a scenario that causes me anxiety or fear, I will visualize not the perfect outcome, but the perfect process. So I'll visualize myself doing that process. So for example, if I'm about to speak on stage

• 10:17Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 10:17Jay Shetty?

  to thousands of people, I won't visualize people clapping and thinking you're amazing. I'll visualize myself walking up those steps onto stage. Walking back and forth on stage, looking at the audience in their eyes.

• 10:32Big Sean?

  Connecting with them.

• 10:32Jay Shetty?

  Connecting with people and their hearts and souls. So I'll visualize that.

• 10:36Big Sean?

  It's important.

• 10:37Jay Shetty?

  It's so important. And then the third type of meditation I do is mantra. And mantra to me is what connects me to the universe, connects me to God, connects me to my soul. It's what connects me to my service to the world. And so mantra is my third. So I practice all three every morning.

• 10:52Big Sean?

  Wow.

• 10:53Jay Shetty?

  And each of them give me a different. Practice and different benefit that I need it for, if that makes sense.

• 10:58Big Sean?

  Yeah, it makes total sense. I change my meditations up frequently from I do mantra meditation sometimes and sometimes I do just guided meditations that are specifically for me, maybe for that week, things I'm really like, not necessarily trying to accomplish, but things that I put in my consciousness, things that I want to approach right. But more importantly, it just gets me right for the day, man. It's like, like I said, it's like taking a shower, like after you work out and you take that shower and you're feeling fresh, like that's what it does for my consciousness, my energy and things just flow better. You know what I'm saying? I feel like I'm literally lifting my vibration up to a higher place of like just to be successful. You know what I mean? And it all starts right there for me.

• 11:43Big Sean?

  You can't do it a right or wrong way. There's no, there is no right or wrong in doing it. The fact you take the time out to just be with yourself, to breathe. Your mind is going to race all over the place sometimes. Sometimes it doesn't, sometimes it does. You bring it back to your breath, you bring it back to maybe whatever you're listening to and just the fact that you take that time out to breathe and to spend that time on yourself, you're gonna feel an incredible difference every time.

• 12:10Jay Shetty?

  It's like a menu.

• 12:12Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 12:12Jay Shetty?

  In the sense of when you go to eat at a restaurant, you don't want to eat the same thing every day.

• 12:16Big Sean?

  Right.

• 12:17Jay Shetty?

  So one day you're feeling like, oh, I need a little bit of this. Or one day you need a little bit of that. And so I think we have to look at meditation as like, okay, well, maybe I need to do an anxiety meditation today. Or maybe I need to do a connection or a forgiveness meditation today.

• 12:30Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 12:31Jay Shetty?

  Or an empathy. And I think we're living at a time right now where you can choose whether you're on YouTube or Spotify or wherever you are.

• 12:38Big Sean?

  Right.

• 12:38Jay Shetty?

  Janai has some phenomenal meditations.

• 12:41Big Sean?

  Mantras, yes.

• 12:41Jay Shetty?

  Mantras and meditations.

• 12:43Big Sean?

  Yeah, we actually just did one where we, I led a meditation and she was sound healing at the same time. It was like an experience.

• 12:49Jay Shetty?

  I haven't seen that.

• 12:50Big Sean?

  I know, you know, it was our first time doing it, so we were trying it out, but it's something that, you know, we wanted to just test out and try and people really enjoyed it and benefited from it, but it's so many different ways of getting that energy out there like that, right? So yeah, there is no right or wrong way to do it. It's just, you know, I realize that it's the richest thing you could do for yourself. You know what I mean? And when I say that word, rich. I don't just mean it like money, right? Because you can be rich in a lot of ways. And I've experienced people who are rich in money and still broke in a lot of ways. Broke meaning broken, right?

• 13:31Big Sean?

  But to me, the richest thing you could do for yourself is to not only just make yourself a priority, but to take that time out to be in the best position you can be in, right? And to not be so caught up on what you want, just to kind of put the attention out there. Because when you're so caught up on what you want, it's so specific onto something, right? It's like, I want this new blue mug. I want this new blue mug. But at the same time, you're holding that vision of that new blue mug. It could be a green mug, a yellow mug, a gold mug that's sitting there waiting for you that's just as good or even better than this mug. But you're closing out all those possibilities. So it's important to, you know, one of the things I do is I don't get so specific with

• 14:16Big Sean?

  my meditations. I just kind of say, for the greater, for whatever is best for me, or what's the greatest, you know, for my happiness, for my joy? Because that's where the real richness is, you know what I'm saying? We've seen people who have all the money in the world to have committed suicide, right? Or, you know, lead singers of groups, you know, we talk about Chester, you know, we talk about Anthony Bourdain, all these different people who, you know, from the outside looking in, you would never guess, you know what I mean? That they're going through something. And everybody is going through something. You know, that's important as a society that remember, everybody is going through something. We talk like we don't care what people are going through, or like, you know, they're not going through something. Everyone's going through something really, really important right now.

• 15:01Big Sean?

  And that's really, it could be really, really hard. And even if they show it or not. And I think that when you, when you take the time to create a rich life for yourself... Uh, that is the best thing you could do because when you take time to work on your internal, your external, it kind of takes the focus off trying to, trying to worry or have anxiety about the things you can't change. And realizing that the things you can't change can't change you. You know, so you get to that, you get to that, that, that point of uh, being able to go through anything. It's like having armor on, you know, you're going through the storm or having like layers on. It's like they can't even get to you for real.

• 15:42Jay Shetty?

  Every time I hear you talk, I shouldn't be surprised that you just constantly drop bars because that is what you do. But literally they were like, they're like seven things you just said that I wanna like piece apart.

• 15:50Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 15:51Jay Shetty?

  Uh, one of the things that I think you just mentioned, which was so powerful was just, you were like, I don't, I'm not, I don't get specific.

• 15:58Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 15:58Jay Shetty?

  And I love that. I think that's actually such a fascinating thing because I think so much of what we're told today is be specific about what you want. Be really specific about it. And the challenge is when you get too specific into that extreme.

• 16:10Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 16:11Jay Shetty?

  Then you can't see what's right there in front of you that could be better. It could be a different way. And I've always thought of it as like you have a projector screen in your head, which is your imagination of what it should look like.

• 16:23Big Sean?

  Right.

• 16:23Jay Shetty?

  And then you have reality happening here and you keep looking for this projection and you miss out, like you said, on the, on the thing that's right there. And so.

• 16:32Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 16:33Jay Shetty?

  I love the idea of not being specific because it releases you from your own insignificant goal.

• 16:42Big Sean?

  Yeah, it does.

• 16:43Jay Shetty?

  Right? It releases you. If I, if I got everything I ever asked for, I wouldn't be here today.

• 16:49Big Sean?

  No.

• 16:50Jay Shetty?

  Because my goals were way too small, my ideas were way too small.

• 16:54Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 16:54Jay Shetty?

  And the universe and God and energy had way bigger plans for me than I had for myself.

• 16:59Big Sean?

  I actually saw the interview you did with Lauren London and she was talking about surrendering to the universe. You do, you have to surrender. And you have to realize that, yeah, okay, and if you are specific, well, then just always make sure in that, you know, specification that you put and more, or and I'm open to whatever possibilities are also available, or what other, you know, options there are, you know, if you are specific, because we can be specific somewhat, but you can't just be too specific and leave it there like you were talking about. You know, you could say, hey, I want to have the number one podcast for, you know, that talks about mental health and all these things, right? But, you know, this specification of that, it's even bigger than that.

• 17:42Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 17:42Big Sean?

  You know what I mean? You're sure, everything you do is way bigger than that, you know? And it's, but you're open to all of those expansive options. So I just hope people realize that like whatever you want in life, first of all, wanting something is acknowledging the lack of it, right? So remember in our last interview, I talked about God gives you what you ask for. So you have to really understand that it's, you know, I kind of don't say I want anything anymore. I don't say that anymore. I say I desire or my intention. You know, I don't say I want it because I'm just acknowledging over and over that I don't have it. And I don't want to match that vibration of not having it anymore.

• 18:25Big Sean?

  So instead, it's, you know, this is my intention, my desire, and I put myself vibrationally on that frequency of already having it, already being there. And that for me works. You know, I don't know if that's works for everyone else, but you know, try it. If life isn't going exactly how you want it to go, which, you know, is 99% of us in this world, try it that way.

• 18:50Jay Shetty?

  That's powerful. For me, that hit right there because I've heard people talk about what want means before, but the way you explained it, when you want something, it's often can remove gratitude. And that doesn't stop you from desiring. And that's what I love what you said. You say, I desire, or I intend, or my intention is. It's not that you don't want to pursue or grow or evolve. It's just that the word want. As you correctly said, makes it feel like almost a sense of ingratitude for what you have.

• 19:21Big Sean?

  That's right.

• 19:22Jay Shetty?

  And the lack of it starts eating away where you're chasing now versus pursuing. I think of the difference between the word chase and pursue.

• 19:32Big Sean?

  There's a difference.

• 19:33Jay Shetty?

  Chase feels desperate. It feels like fleeting. It feels like if I don't have it, I'm incomplete.

• 19:38Big Sean?

  Yeah, like I want this. I'm chasing this. It's like, okay, like I get that. And you know, especially in the industries we're in, it's like, yeah, it's great to have that hunger. You know, it is good to have that, but it's never cool to just be desperate. Like, it's kind of like, just always like, uh, realize those small things can make a big difference, especially when you're, when you're manifesting something, you know?

• 20:00Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, I, I think that's great advice on manifestation. I think that's really powerful. And I liked what you said about.

• 20:08Big Sean?

  I like what you said about gratitude, though.

• 20:09Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 20:10Big Sean?

  Yeah. Tell me how important that is to you. Like, how, how, how often do you practice like gratitude? Cause I wake up every morning and I'm like, thank you, man. Thank you, God. Like while I'm still half asleep. You know what I mean? Because, bro, like, we're on the blessed side of the spectrum. Just the fact that we get to wake up.

• 20:25Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, I think gratitude is a daily, multiple times a day practice for absolutely everything. I was saying earlier today to someone that if something went wrong today, I would tell everyone about it. But if something went right today.

• 20:42Big Sean?

  Right.

• 20:42Jay Shetty?

  Probably wouldn't tell anyone about it.

• 20:44Big Sean?

  Right?

• 20:45Jay Shetty?

  Right? Like, so if, if everything in my schedule went to plan, no one would hear about it. But if everything in my schedule went not to plan, I would tell everyone, oh my gosh, my flight got delayed. Oh, and then I like missed eating my lunch and then I was late for this and I would tell everyone about it.

• 21:01Big Sean?

  And what does that mean?

• 21:02Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, what does that mean? It means that we are not noticing the greatness and the gifts in our life. When everything goes to plan and we don't share that, you never go to someone, oh, it was amazing. Everything went to plan, like everything, like you wouldn't, you wouldn't say, oh, my flight was on time. That's amazing. We expect, we expect things to happen well. And when you expect something to happen well, you stop feeling gratitude for it. You stop feeling like, well, actually I'm really fortunate that this happened on time.

• 21:31Big Sean?

  Yeah. And it makes it more pleasurable, right?

• 21:32Jay Shetty?

  Absolutely.

• 21:33Big Sean?

  When you go, when you got that gratitude and you, you know, you feel just better about it, like, yeah, man, like.

• 21:38Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. And, and I think also gratitude for everything from the smallest things, like to me. Something I practiced with my wife that's it came naturally and now I see it being beneficial. But if she's like helping me out with something or she does the tiniest thing, being able to be grateful for that rather than thinking, oh, well, you're my wife. I expect you to do that.

• 21:59Big Sean?

  Right.

• 22:00Jay Shetty?

  I just think the word expectation and the idea of expectations create a really unhealthy relationship with ourselves and with others, right?

• 22:09Big Sean?

  But yeah, setting expectations, that's like the recipe for disaster right there. It's like, you know, you gotta just, first of all, the gratitude and letting somebody know that they're, I, I, that's why every, every, almost, I think every night, at least that I can remember, every night that I work, when I'm in the studio or working with people, I always tell my engineer, like, man, you did a great job.

• 22:30Jay Shetty?

  I love that.

• 22:31Big Sean?

  Great work. And, you know, you could just see that they're wanting to keep doing a great job. Everyone who works with me, like, you, man, you're doing a great job, like, and not from just like my managers and every, down to my assistants, to every person who's involved in my life, to my family members, my friends, I'd be like, man, you're doing a great job. I keep it up. And it just is, it's great to, and I mean it too. I'm not just saying it because it's to say it. I mean it. If I didn't, if I didn't think they were doing a great job, I wouldn't say that, you know, I would just be like, do better. But, but when they do a great job, you have to recognize that and not set yourself up for expectations because that's, that's a recipe for disaster, man. It's like,

• 23:09Big Sean?

  expecting anything out of life, you know, even expecting to wake up, it's like, you can't even expect that. That doesn't happen to everyone.

• 23:17Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 23:17Big Sean?

  You know, so, uh, that's one of the, when I read the book, The Four Agreements, and that's one of them. Uh, I think one of them was to not have expectations or something like that. Yeah.

• 23:28Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. I feel like also what you just said, whatever you recognize in someone, they'll repeat it. And it took me a long time to realize that if I make someone feel bad for something they don't do well, they actually get scared to try and do it right.

• 23:47Big Sean?

  Right.

• 23:47Jay Shetty?

  If you make someone feel guilty

• 23:49Big Sean?

  Oh, yeah.

• 23:50Jay Shetty?

  for something, they actually get more scared. So I used to do this, my wife's the best example where I got this wrong for a long time. When my wife didn't understand how to, you know, what I wanted for my birthday or something like that. And I would feel, this is years ago when we were dating, like, I'm talking about like, I don't know, maybe like eight years ago or something.

• 24:08Big Sean?

  Okay.

• 24:09Jay Shetty?

  And I would Tell her like you don't you don't get me like you don't understand me like that's not what I wanted. And I realized.

• 24:17Big Sean?

  Wow, that's harsh, man.

• 24:18Jay Shetty?

  Oh, so bad, so bad, man, so bad. But I always thought that if I said that, then hopefully she would change and she would get it about how serious it is.

• 24:26Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 24:27Jay Shetty?

  And then she told me years later that that just made her more scared and fearful to try and get me a gift on my birthday.

• 24:34Big Sean?

  Wow.

• 24:34Jay Shetty?

  Because she just felt she got it wrong all the time.

• 24:36Big Sean?

  Hmm.

• 24:37Jay Shetty?

  And so we think that if we keep telling people they're getting it wrong, then they'll get it right.

• 24:42Big Sean?

  No.

• 24:42Jay Shetty?

  That doesn't work. If you don't take the time to explain and to express and communicate and articulate what you really are looking for and why and where that comes from. If you don't do that work, you can't expect someone to read your mind and understand you.

• 24:57Big Sean?

  No, you can't. We expect that so much from our partners, right?

• 25:01Jay Shetty?

  And everyone.

• 25:01Big Sean?

  And everyone. We get attitudes with them and it's just like, like you said, they don't know what you're going through. You don't know what they're going through. And on top of that, we're all just doing our best out here, man. Like when you, if you honestly ask me, like, that's that's usually my answer for almost like, how have you been doing this? Like, I'm doing my best, you know, and we all are doing our best in these times, right? The world is going through so many things at once. You know, I was talking to Sadhguru and he was telling me about how the soil is so messed up nowadays, you know, like we're getting forty percent of the amount of food that, uh, the amount of nutrition we used to get from food is

• 25:42Big Sean?

  we we get only get forty percent of that now because of the soil has not been replenished, right? And that, you know, the population has gone from four billion to eight billion people from nineteen sixty to now, or nine billion now. And soon it's gonna go from nine billion to thirteen billion in, you know, the next thirty something, forty years. And they're saying that at that point, if we don't replenish the soil. And take care of the oceans and many other things that the famine is gonna be not only at a a crazy, crazy level we've never seen, but it's, you know, food won't even be available.

• 26:20Jay Shetty?

  Wow.

• 26:21Big Sean?

  And or or affordable and, you know, I was I was asking him like, man, how do we like? How do we replenish the soil? And one of the thing, there's a lot of ways that, you know, I can talk about that another time. But one of the things I was thinking, he was saying that, you know, as humans, we're supposed to go back into the earth. Mother nature, mother earth, we're supposed to go back into and replenish the soil, you know, and enrich the soil. And I was thinking how sometimes we, uh, like, you know, how we have like caskets and we like fill our fill our bodies, our shells with, uh, you know, whatever it is, the chemical to make us last forever. But it's like, we're never gonna dig each, we're never gonna dig, I'm never gonna dig my grandfather up from his grave. It's like, uh, he needs to be replenished back into the earth because if you think about it, that's just polluting

• 27:06Big Sean?

  the earth at that point. That's almost like trash on the ground when you, and no disrespect, you know, I don't mean that in any disrespectful way. I just mean in a scientific way, it's kind of like a matter that doesn't dispose, you know? I'm not trying to, uh.

• 27:19Jay Shetty?

  I get what you're saying.

• 27:20Big Sean?

  You see, you see what I'm saying? Because it is a very sensitive thing, you know, to talk about my relatives, even my grandfather, who I love very much. But what I'm saying is, it would have meant just as much as he would have disposed back and it became part of the soil and the earth. You know what I mean? Uh, and that's something to really pay attention to as the population grows and the space gets smaller and smaller. And we need to build more and more developments over the soil that we really need to be feeding ourselves and taking care of the earth with. You know what I mean?

• 27:48Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 27:48Big Sean?

  Yeah, so that's, that's something that the earth is just going, that's another thing earth is going through aside from the world, you know, the possible world wars that could be upon us and besides from all the conflict and the. You know, all these borders and just countries where slavery is still going on and places is just, you know, a crazy amount of problems on this list that, you know, that the world is going through and we just have to like really, really boss up and be our best selves and, you know, take care of ourselves to present our greatest version to the world, you know, to help out any way we can.

• 28:25Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 28:26Big Sean?

  That's why this is so important.

• 28:27Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. How, how do you process that? I'm intrigued because I, I grapple with that a lot as well, that exactly what you just said. You look around the world, whether it's poverty, racism, war, potential famine, like you're just seeing all of this. And I think a lot of people look at all of that and they get really overwhelmed.

• 28:45Big Sean?

  They do.

• 28:46Jay Shetty?

  And then they feel helpless. And these are good people. These are people who care.

• 28:52Big Sean?

  Of course.

• 28:53Jay Shetty?

  They're empathetic people.

• 28:54Big Sean?

  Of course.

• 28:54Jay Shetty?

  But then when they see all this, they just feel helpless and they feel confused and they feel disheartened. And then they don't know what to do or how to help. And then they feel paralyzed. So in that situation, how do you process this? Or how do you think about getting involved? Because the way I think about it is I realize that working on myself, as you rightly said, that's not going to solve it, but it helps me bring my best to this situation.

• 29:24Big Sean?

  Hundred percent.

• 29:24Jay Shetty?

  Right? Like if I'm in a mess myself.

• 29:26Big Sean?

  It starts there to me at least. It starts there.

• 29:29Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. It's like if I'm in a mess myself, how can I remove any mess? The way it was explained when I lived as a monk is that if we ourselves are not trying to be purified, who are we to help cleanse anything? Right? So how can you cleanse something externally if you're not purifying yourself internally? It's not, not possible. But then when you do that, the whole goal of working on yourself, and I think this is what's often missed, the whole point of self-care is service.

• 29:57Big Sean?

  It's.

• 29:58Jay Shetty?

  The whole point of internal purification is to help detox and cleanse externally, right?

• 30:04Big Sean?

  That to me, the whole purpose of self-care is the complete opposite of being selfish. You know, it's, um, it's actually like you said, a service to the world. So when you are overwhelmed with all the anxiety of everything that's going on, you're overwhelmed with. Your, you know, your personal problems and the world's problems and just things seem to be too much. We all go through this. It is the most important thing to rely on the faith that everything is gonna be okay, you know, and when you put your best foot forward, when you do take care of the, the extra steps to take care of yourself to bring your best foot forward, you realize like we talked about last time, that the faith that, you know, the reason that we're in

• 30:48Big Sean?

  this moment in the first place is because we have the ability to change this moment. The great part about being in any situation, whether you're up or down in life, is that it's a amazing opportunity and you have the ability to change every situation, right? So, you know, when you have that faith, like I talked about that invisible bridge, when you have that faith that you can just walk across and you don't really see how you're gonna get across, but you know it's there. And you step on that, off that cliff and on to the, to where you don't see anything and you still haven't fallen. That's what faith is and that's what we have to have in each other as a society and realize that the, the more conscious we are and the more we work on ourselves, the, the more

• 31:30Big Sean?

  steps we're taking to get to the, to the other side of things. You know what I mean?

• 31:34Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. And how do you think, how do you develop that? Because when I saw your face describing the, the faith and the invisible bridge and the steps, when I watch you describe that, I can see that it's realized. It's a realization for you. This isn't just some idea or something you read in a book, or it's, it's realized. How did you develop that faith over the years? Because it was a step-by-step process in being able to see that, because I think a lot of people, if you try and fake that faith, it doesn't work.

• 32:11Big Sean?

  Can't work.

• 32:12Jay Shetty?

  It doesn't work. And if you try and avoid that faith, that doesn't work because you need to have something. Like there was a amazing study I read recently, and they said that people who were involved in wars and stuck in trenches and stuck in the most difficult situations known to humanity, when they had false hope, and this is hope, not faith, when they had false hope, they actually felt more dejected. So if they had the false hope that we'll be back by Christmas.

• 32:47Jay Shetty?

  And they didn't get back by Christmas, that would break their resolve. But if they believed we won't get back by Christmas, but we will get back. That allowed them to have faith. That's deep. To actually move forward, that simple shift. Yeah. Of not putting a timeline, not putting a deadline, not having false hope, but having that long-term faith. So I wonder, how do you, how did you develop that? Because I think that's something that's not talked about enough is how is it developed? This episode is brought to you by Mazda. The best habits are the ones we hardly notice, the ones that quietly shape the way we move through life, giving us the confidence to focus on what really matters. That's Mazda's approach to safety.

• 33:29Jay Shetty?

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• 34:10Jay Shetty?

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• 34:56Jay Shetty?

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• 35:39Jay Shetty?

  That's indeed.com/podcast. Terms and conditions apply. Need to hire? This is a job for Indeed sponsored jobs.

• 35:50Big Sean?

  Through life, through experiences, through setting deadlines, setting expectations for myself and not realizing them from my worst fears. What I thought was my worst fear, things that I wouldn't ever be able to, you know, recover from, right, or bounce back from. It's like, these things, when they even happen, you realize that, okay, I, in the first place, should never be mad at a timeline, because how can I be mad at a timeline or something I'm getting done, or a deadline when I'm on God's, when I'm moving at God's speed? I'm not moving at my speed.

• 36:31Big Sean?

  I can set my intention, I can give my attention to that intention of hopefully getting something done and make it done earlier. I may want to finish something by April and it might get done in February. You know, I may want to get something done in April and it won't be done till next April. Who knows? Because it's unknown. But when we embrace that unknown, which a lot of us is hard to do, because, you know, we always like to think about what's the worst that could happen instead of what's the best that could happen. I had to change my whole mindset to think, okay, what's the best that could happen? You know, because I don't even want to track what's the worst that could happen. That's like such a normal saying that I'm like, that saying is whack. I had to flip it over to what's the best that could happen. You know what I mean? Because...

• 37:18Big Sean?

  I have a hundred percent faith, just the fact that we wake up every day that everything is gonna be alright.

• 37:24Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 37:24Big Sean?

  You know, just, you know, and, and get down to just the simplest things. I like, I love how you talk about breathing. Because you realize how much of a pleasure it is to, to breathe. If you hold your breath. And don't breathe for, you know, I can hold my breath for like a minute and a half.

• 37:40Jay Shetty?

  Wow.

• 37:40Big Sean?

  And you don't breathe, and then when you breathe. Exhale, inhale, you realize how much of a pleasure it is for real to even just be on, be here today breathing.

• 37:50Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 37:51Big Sean?

  You know what I mean?

• 37:51Jay Shetty?

  So well said, yeah. It's just, we would choose to breathe over anything if you had to be forced to choose.

• 37:59Big Sean?

  Right.

• 37:59Jay Shetty?

  Right? Because everything else would not be an experience if you couldn't breathe.

• 38:04Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 38:05Jay Shetty?

  Right?

• 38:05Big Sean?

  And that's not promise, breath isn't a promise, right?

• 38:07Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 38:08Big Sean?

  Your lungs could shut down, the, the earth, the environment could change at any moment, you know, something, a natural catastrophe or disaster could happen. And that could be immediately taken away from us.

• 38:17Jay Shetty?

  Recently, I was reading from, I was reading from Viktor Frankl's Man's Search for Meaning Again.

• 38:24Big Sean?

  Hmm.

• 38:24Jay Shetty?

  And I think it's called Twelve Gifts for Life by Edith Eger. So they both survived the Holocaust.

• 38:32Big Sean?

  Hmm.

• 38:33Jay Shetty?

  And I was reading that because of what's happening in the world.

• 38:36Big Sean?

  Hmm.

• 38:37Jay Shetty?

  And to me, at this time, when the world's going through these things. The only people I can turn towards are the people who've lived through it.

• 38:48Big Sean?

  Right.

• 38:48Jay Shetty?

  I often think that those are the people that can guide us the deepest.

• 38:52Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 38:53Jay Shetty?

  And so when people ask me for my guidance at these times. I go, let's look at these people's guidance.

• 38:59Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 38:59Jay Shetty?

  Because they were actually there. Like Edith and Victor talk about them being in the concentration camps. Seeing people dragged, seeing children abused, like this is all happening around them.

• 39:15Big Sean?

  Hmm.

• 39:15Jay Shetty?

  And Edith Eger said something that I think you'll appreciate so much. She said, I realized, and I had to realize that I wasn't the prisoner. But the gods were the prisoners of their own conscience.

• 39:32Jay Shetty?

  And she goes, when I realized that I wasn't imprisoned, the people who were being imprisoned by their hatred and imprisoned by their own pain and imprisoned by their desire to dominate and control and to abuse people, that's the real prison. I was free. Like, you hear someone say that going through the most atrocious, horrendous thing they could possibly go through, but that was her mindset. She's still living, she survived.

• 39:59Big Sean?

  Man, what a crazy thing to survive through.

• 40:01Jay Shetty?

  Right, and to have that perspective. And she was saying that it was that perspective, it's what you're saying, that in that moment, she had to rewire how she saw what was going on so that she could get through it.

• 40:15Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 40:15Jay Shetty?

  If she just accepted it for what it was, she said she would have lost that resolve.

• 40:19Big Sean?

  That's one of those lessons only life can teach you, right? She was, she, that's one of those lessons. Like, we go through these things and experiences that there's no other way to, uh, I just hope that people realize when they go through things, it doesn't have to be such a traumatic experience or such a detrimental thing or such a, you know, uh, immeasurable loss or anything. It's, you know, the fact that you're able to survive through the day. You know, there was somebody who got murdered around the corner from in the neighborhood I live in, and I'm just like...

• 40:53Jay Shetty?

  Oh, you're saying actually, like, right?

• 40:54Big Sean?

  Yeah, like yesterday.

• 40:55Jay Shetty?

  Wow.

• 40:56Big Sean?

  Yeah, like in the same neighborhood, a nice neighborhood. But my point is, is that we take for granted how much of a blessing it is to be here right now and to wake up and be here, you know what I mean? So, you know, we, we, we learn these lessons and I, I just hope that we can pay attention to the lessons that life teaches us. You know, because you have to really make a mental, you have to really acknowledge what you're experiencing. Or else it just goes in one ear and out the other.

• 41:24Jay Shetty?

  Totally.

• 41:24Big Sean?

  You have to learn the lesson, you know? And even that story you told me, she learned that lesson while she was in that concentration camp in the Holocaust. She learned that, okay, you're actually the prisoner because you're trapped in your prison of your consciousness. And you know, if you wanting to dominate another person and trap another person, that is already a prison. You know, I'm in here, I'm in a cage, but I'm the one who's free minded and free thinking and, you know, has faith that I'm gonna get past this and two totally different experiences, right? So just embrace the experience that you're going through and realize it, you know? We got the, we're leasing these bodies for a limited time only, right?

• 42:07Big Sean?

  Like our experience here is very, very limited, so we got, we have to make something. You know, we can't just sit around and watch other people live their lives. We gotta go out and figure out what that means for us. You know, and how you do that is you do do the work on yourself. A lot of people may be watching this and may not know what they want to do. They don't know what they're passionate about. Maybe they just like being on the internet all day. Maybe they just like watching movies and TV all day. But you know, you can't figure out exactly what you're all the way passionate about until you actually try things. Try things out. I had to try things myself because I didn't really know what I was passionate about besides music. I had to go jump out of a plane. I had to like try new things, start working out.

• 42:47Big Sean?

  I had to, you know, do hikes and be like, I really like hiking, like I really like this, you know what I'm saying? You know, I think that's one of the things, one of the quickest escapes people can go to is like drugs, right? It's like an instant escape and a way to get high. But man, there's so many other ways to get high, you know what I'm saying, in life without, without using that. And I don't, not even to sound like, you know, you know, corny or whatever, whatever people may think that sounds, but it's like, there are a lot of ways. You know, to that I've been high off life that a drug could never give me. You know what I'm saying? Like the type of high that is like God given that only the universe can provide.

• 43:27Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, that's so well said.

• 43:28Big Sean?

  That's the best, that's the best high.

• 43:30Jay Shetty?

  It's so well said and you know, it's in the scriptures, it's called the higher taste.

• 43:35Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 43:35Jay Shetty?

  Like the idea that when you, it's almost like when you look at a child.

• 43:40Big Sean?

  Hmm.

• 43:40Jay Shetty?

  If you give a child a popsicle, the child will want that.

• 43:45Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 43:46Jay Shetty?

  And if you try and give a child a diamond or a million dollar investment. They won't understand it.

• 43:53Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 43:53Jay Shetty?

  And they'll be like, I'd rather have this popsicle.

• 43:55Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 43:56Jay Shetty?

  But then when that child gets older and matures, they go, oh, that investment or that thing could have been more valuable. And so what we see as a valuable experience changes as we mature. And it's what you said about experiences is so true.

• 44:12Big Sean?

  Hmm.

• 44:12Jay Shetty?

  Uh, Ravi and I recently, we try and do something every month that we do that's random that we wouldn't expect to do. So recently we went to a rage room.

• 44:21Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 44:21Jay Shetty?

  And I had no desire.

• 44:24Big Sean?

  What's that like?

• 44:25Jay Shetty?

  So a rage room, they give you baseball bats and lead pipes and stuff like that.

• 44:28Big Sean?

  And you smash, yeah.

• 44:30Jay Shetty?

  And so we went to that and me and Ravi are both not angry people, like we're not aggressive people in general.

• 44:37Big Sean?

  Uh huh.

• 44:37Jay Shetty?

  But we were like, we have to go experiment because if we don't experiment, how do you know, right? You gotta go check it out. So.

• 44:43Big Sean?

  Was it fun, man?

• 44:44Jay Shetty?

  It was hilarious to watch us because we were both like, you know, we were both like not violent people.

• 44:50Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 44:50Jay Shetty?

  And so we're struggling, then we realized something really interesting. They told me afterwards, I wish they told me before, they said, if you go there and you're stressed out because your boyfriend broke up with you or someone's been rude to you or you've been offended, then it will de-stress you.

• 45:07Big Sean?

  Hmm.

• 45:08Jay Shetty?

  But if you go there when you're not stressed, the research shows that you leave stressed. So that was me and my wife.

• 45:14Big Sean?

  Oh damn.

• 45:15Jay Shetty?

  We went there not stressed and we left with stress. It was actually stressful.

• 45:19Big Sean?

  Wow.

• 45:20Jay Shetty?

  To cause rage when you don't feel any.

• 45:21Big Sean?

  Uh huh.

• 45:22Jay Shetty?

  And so, but so that was an experience that didn't go well, right?

• 45:25Big Sean?

  Right, but you gotta try it though.

• 45:26Jay Shetty?

  But that's okay, you gotta try it.

• 45:28Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 45:28Jay Shetty?

  And so.

• 45:28Big Sean?

  And you, and the fact that you two were together is probably just, it's something that you'll always remember, right?

• 45:33Jay Shetty?

  Yes.

• 45:33Big Sean?

  So in hindsight, it probably was a pleasurable experience.

• 45:36Jay Shetty?

  Exactly. It's a funny story now that we get to tell and be like, we did this thing, it didn't work out. But I think that's what you're saying that we have to just experience more and experiment more.

• 45:46Big Sean?

  Mm hmm.

• 45:46Jay Shetty?

  Rather than turn to the obvious things that we've seen over society, like as you said, like drugs and alcohol or any of these things. That can become painful in the long run.

• 45:57Big Sean?

  Hmm.

• 45:57Jay Shetty?

  As opposed to what you said, hey, whether it's going for a hike or whether it's doing this thing or that thing or whatever it may be. So I think that's, that's just really simple, practical advice that anyone can follow.

• 46:07Big Sean?

  Yeah, and you know, and I'm not judging anybody who does that too, you know, because. How, how do we have, that's one thing I want people to remember too, like we don't have the right to judge anybody going through anything. And we sit up and judge each other all day on social media or in real life too. And you know, that's a, you know, I want to tie that back to another thing that I was talking about. Because everyone is going through something, you never know, right? But that's not even a, it's a, it's a very conditional thing to try and keep up a, a image or a facade, right? And, uh, you know, even like money is such a conditional thing.

• 46:50Big Sean?

  Like that's why when I say rich, yeah, you could be rich in money, but it's conditional, right? So when that money goes, you're not even rich anymore. It's like if you took all the money away from me or any, or anyone around me or my family. We are at a point where we, we were rich before we had money. You know what I'm saying? Because. Of the, the, the rich practices that we were taught, you know, which is, you know, to take care, you know, to take care of yourself early on, which is a lesson that I kind of put on the back burner and went through, experienced life and life was hitting me and beating me up. And I had to take a step back and reaffirm the things that I already knew, but really strengthen them up. You know what I mean? And that, that is, that is being rich for real, you know, because money is conditional.

• 47:35Big Sean?

  And that's the energy we've assigned it. It's the currency of our, you know, our, our, I guess you could say just our countries, our, our living, the way we live, but really, you know, time is like the currency of our, uh, universe, you know, and love is like the currency of all. You know, love is every, love is God, right? So I know I'm kind of rambling.

• 48:00Jay Shetty?

  No, you're not at all. No, that resonates, man.

• 48:03Big Sean?

  Yeah, I just want people to get that though, man, because it's like, try not to judge. You're just wasting, when you judging somebody else, you're really just wasting your time. You're really just giving somebody else your energy that's so valuable. You could be building something, you could be building a mountain with that energy. You could be building a mountain or a future or a career or something else. And instead you're really worried about somebody else or tearing somebody else down. And that just, that just doesn't make sense. It's so easy to do though. It's so easy for a lot of people.

• 48:35Jay Shetty?

  And it gives you a quick boost.

• 48:36Big Sean?

  It gives you a quick boost.

• 48:37Jay Shetty?

  Makes you feel good in the moment.

• 48:38Big Sean?

  Yeah, it does because I think it makes people feel good in the moment or, you know, who I can't speak for people, but I think we can get obsessed with validation and like retweets or like a lot of likes or like getting a reaction or getting attention, but you know, one of the things that I've realized is that people kind of put morals to the side, you know, they will literally leak something of you is very private. It could be a nude, it could be a thing, it could be something and they put all the morals aside and be like, oh, this is going to get a lot of attention, so I'm gonna put it out. I don't care where he's going. It doesn't matter what he's going through, like, you know, but really, and I'm not just speaking about me, I'm talking about anyone, like that person could be going through, could be on the edge and that pushes him over the edge. You never know. So just always keep that in mind, like.

• 49:23Jay Shetty?

  That's huge.

• 49:24Big Sean?

  Don't, don't, like, it's okay to, you know, want a lot of retweets and want a lot of love and likes and stuff. We all, you know, we all do that. We're, we're, we're professionals. So yeah, when we touch and communicate with a lot of people and people show love, that's great, but. I just wanted to, I want to prioritize that, you know, at least I do and realize that my morals come first though.

• 49:43Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 49:44Big Sean?

  You know what I mean?

• 49:45Jay Shetty?

  And, and not, and what you just said is making sure that whatever we're doing is not at the expense of someone else.

• 49:51Big Sean?

  You know what I mean?

• 49:51Jay Shetty?

  So you want to act in a way that doesn't cost anyone else anything.

• 49:55Big Sean?

  Exactly.

• 49:55Jay Shetty?

  Right?

• 49:56Big Sean?

  Yeah, that's exactly what I was trying to say.

• 49:57Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, you don't want to make someone pay for what you behave as.

• 50:01Big Sean?

  Mm-hmm.

• 50:02Jay Shetty?

  Right? You'd never want that. And because none of us want to be in that situation.

• 50:05Big Sean?

  No.

• 50:06Jay Shetty?

  And I think that's what we, we disconnect with. And one of the things I had to learn

• 50:10Big Sean?

  Mm-hmm.

• 50:10Jay Shetty?

  is to learn to stop judging people who judge others.

• 50:15Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 50:15Jay Shetty?

  So I had the judgment of people who judge and I'd be like, well, you should stop judging. And I'm like, wait, but that is a judgment.

• 50:21Big Sean?

  That's a judgment.

• 50:21Jay Shetty?

  Like, that's a judgment. And so it's like, okay, well, well, let me meet that person with compassion.

• 50:26Big Sean?

  And understanding.

• 50:27Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 50:28Big Sean?

  You under, I under, because we understand it.

• 50:29Jay Shetty?

  Because I do it.

• 50:30Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 50:31Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 50:31Big Sean?

  And we can't judge. We, we only have to like, you know, at least I, I can only speak for myself. Like I, I've learned to just stop judging people. Realize we're all humans. If we weren't here to learn something or if we were perfect, we wouldn't even be here. We would already be on our next, on the next wave of, you know, existence or whatever comes next, you know?

• 50:51Jay Shetty?

  Absolutely. What's, what's been the most recent thing? You were talking about learning life's lessons.

• 50:57Big Sean?

  Mm-hmm.

• 50:57Jay Shetty?

  What do you think's been the most recent life lesson, big or small, that's come across your path? That's kind of stayed with you or been on your mind? I just wonder because, you know, we always talk about learning lessons through life and people think that they have to be these huge, big ones. But sometimes it's just something every day. But what's it been for you? Has there been anything that stood out?

• 51:15Big Sean?

  Yeah, to have fun.

• 51:17Jay Shetty?

  Nice, yeah.

• 51:18Big Sean?

  To make, to make everything you're doing fun, period. Because we're here for such a limited time. And when we see somebody pass away that's close to us or someone we idolize, our heroes, our family members, our friends, whatever, just, you know, you gotta realize that, okay, I do work, but I need to make this fun because that is the key to happiness, right? And I feel like that is to me, the only thing that really, that's real success is when you're happy. So you gotta have fun with whatever you're doing. Like, you have to, and if it's not fun, you gotta make it fun. Or do something else, you know, even if it pays your bills or anything, like you gotta, like, if you just approach it like that.

• 52:01Big Sean?

  I'm telling you, the whole, something that may be so depressing to you can completely change. That job you may have been working on, I've been doing this since I was 11 years old, by the way, making music, you know? And obviously, I want to do other things with my life. Like, I mean, you were telling, I want to write a book.

• 52:16Jay Shetty?

  I can't wait for that, man.

• 52:18Big Sean?

  Yeah, because, you know, I've learned so many lessons, like, from you or from Deepak. You know, I get to sit with Sadhguru and

• 52:24Jay Shetty?

  From your mother?

• 52:25Big Sean?

  My mom, especially. I get to sit with Janae. I get to sit with all these amazing, I get to sit with Marie Diamond. I get to sit with a lot of people who know so much. And I know that it's one of my life purposes to, to put that information into, you know, and all the experiences I've been through, all the testaments I've seen, all the just magic that I've witnessed in my life. You know, that's the reason I want to write a book. I'm not doing it because, oh, it's a cool thing for your career to do, like, write a book, like. I feel like I have to write a book because it's like one of my missions for humanity.

• 52:58Jay Shetty?

  I want to read that book, man. I, I, I think it's fascinating, hearing about everyone's journey to how they started going inward.

• 53:06Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 53:06Jay Shetty?

  Right? Like, that's what's fascinating, right? Like, we always, books are always written about the journey outwards. What did you succeed? What did you achieve? Where did you get to? But to me, books that are about the journey inward,

• 53:18Big Sean?

  Right.

• 53:18Jay Shetty?

  we need to tell those stories because those are the journeys we struggle to take even more.

• 53:23Big Sean?

  Yeah, and those are the, and those are the journeys that are a little bit more untold, right?

• 53:26Jay Shetty?

  Yes, and unseen.

• 53:28Big Sean?

  Yeah, unseen, that we need to relate to, and especially my people who listen to me, like, I, I feel like I really need to do that, and but that is one thing I've learned, though, to, just to go back to what you said, is like, to have fun with it.

• 53:39Jay Shetty?

  Hmm.

• 53:39Big Sean?

  Make sure you have fun with it and make it fun. Like, bring whatever you think is fun to whatever you have to do. Like, if you think, well, I think playing video games is fun, well, then bring that to work somehow, like, figure out a way to, like, incorporate that, or figure out a way to balance that into your life somehow, like, you can't let go of the fun of anything, because then everything just gets depressing.

• 54:01Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 54:02Big Sean?

  You know, you get wiped out and you're not even doing a service to anyone at that point.

• 54:06Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, and I think that's the interesting thing.

• 54:08Big Sean?

  It's a simple lesson, though, right?

• 54:09Jay Shetty?

  It's a beaut, but that's what I love about it, because it doesn't have to be this deep, profound lesson, like.

• 54:15Big Sean?

  Yeah, usually the simple ones are the, are the, are the good ones, yeah.

• 54:18Jay Shetty?

  Like, like for mine, it's been prioritizing rest. Like I love prioritizing rest and refuel like one of my favorite things to do like.

• 54:27Big Sean?

  That need that's that's something I still have not mastered.

• 54:29Jay Shetty?

  Deep rest, right?

• 54:31Big Sean?

  Deep rest.

• 54:31Jay Shetty?

  Rest like letting yourself just have this deep silence, stillness, calmness, whatever gives that to you. I find like being able to, one of the things I really do enjoy doing and and I think it's fun and that's why fun is such a wide word. Is um doing like a sensory deprivation tank.

• 54:50Big Sean?

  Oh, yeah.

• 54:51Jay Shetty?

  So like when I'm sitting in a sensory deprivation tank and all my senses are off.

• 54:55Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 54:56Jay Shetty?

  It's actually a beautiful experience for me. That's deep rest and that is fun for me.

• 55:00Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 55:01Jay Shetty?

  Because I'm no longer like dealing with any of the challenges or stresses or pressures. I'm able to just be. Yeah, so inside of your it's magnesium and water.

• 55:11Big Sean?

  Yeah, that's right.

• 55:12Jay Shetty?

  Naturally float for anyone who's never done it before. You can go in there for half an hour, hour, two hours.

• 55:18Big Sean?

  It's pitch black.

• 55:18Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, it's dark. Some of them, if they're a bit bougie, they have the uh.

• 55:22Big Sean?

  The lights.

• 55:22Jay Shetty?

  The lights, the music, like a little bit of like.

• 55:24Big Sean?

  Moody lights and things.

• 55:25Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, moody lights, moody music.

• 55:28Jay Shetty?

  But the idea is to just not let your senses be triggered. And I find that's what I crave is letting my senses no longer be overexposed or overstimulated. One of my favorite things to do is look out into the distance. To watch sunsets, to watch the sunrise, to just look at the sky, because I find it's the least overstimulating thing in our lives. When you look at your phone, you're overstimulated.

• 55:53Big Sean?

  Right.

• 55:53Jay Shetty?

  You switch on the news, you're overexposed. Everything's overwhelming.

• 55:58Big Sean?

  You gotta take that time for yourself.

• 56:00Jay Shetty?

  Correct. I love to do anything that helps me understand myself, that helps me underwhelm myself.

• 56:06Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 56:07Jay Shetty?

  Helps me.

• 56:07Big Sean?

  Unwind.

• 56:08Jay Shetty?

  Un- unwind, yeah, unwind myself. That's what I crave. And I've realized that that's my reward to myself.

• 56:16Big Sean?

  It's not just a um luxury that that is necessary.

• 56:20Jay Shetty?

  It's a part of richness.

• 56:22Big Sean?

  It's a part of richness. It is um and I think that the mentality that I've experienced and that I've always had is like. You have to like stay on it. You have to stay on it like and almost to a point where I feel like I didn't deserve rest sometimes. I didn't, I just, I didn't deserve it like. I'm not almost finished with my stuff. I gotta keep going. I can't, you know, but that was totally the wrong. That was me coming from a place of desperation and not a place of knowing and having faith. Because you know, rest is one of the many joys of our life, man. Going to sleep, having that good sleep. Like those and you know, by the way, that's the moment, a lot of times when we're in that deep sleep though, those are the moments that.

• 57:07Big Sean?

  A lot of visions and a lot of inspiration and a lot of ideas are transmuted to us and. You know, we're just a vessel. So you know that we, we sometimes we go to a higher place when we're sleeping. And our, at our most relaxed state, right? So. I have been learning to get rest. I go to sleep kind of weird times, especially when I'm making music, like I'll go to sleep at like three or four in the morning, which is terrible.

• 57:30Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 57:30Big Sean?

  You know what I mean? But. It is nothing like getting some good rest, man. Nothing like it.

• 57:36Jay Shetty?

  But what you just said.

• 57:37Big Sean?

  And you deserve it and you, and people deserve it. People will think that they don't deserve rest or you know, they work two jobs and all those things like. You deserve that rest, man. And like longevity is better than anything. You can burn yourself out and. Go double shifts, triple shifts, don't need sleep, only need two, three hours of sleep, all that. Get your rest, man. Get that rest. Get as much rest as you need because when you're fully rested. That's when you can really make real waves in whatever industry or whatever dream you have, whatever thing you got going on, you know?

• 58:08Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, I was actually just about to say that. I think that's the most powerful thing you said there. As you were sharing that the idea that we don't give ourselves permission for things we don't deserve. So we don't give ourselves the permission to rest if we don't feel we deserve rest. And a lot of us don't feel we deserve rest. We don't feel we deserve fun. We don't feel we deserve joy. And so we don't allow ourselves to have that feeling. And as you were saying then, you used that word deserve. I was like, I just want everyone to stop, everyone who's listening right now to this episode or watching this episode. To just stop and think, what are you not? Feeling like you deserve.

• 58:53Big Sean?

  Yeah, people feel like they might not deserve real love. I'm a, I don't deserve a partner or I don't deserve the rest. I don't deserve to go out and have fun. I haven't been getting enough work done. Like, that's all crazy. None of that stuff is connected to each other, man. Like, take care, take care of yourself first and foremost and watch how more beautiful your life unfolds.

• 59:12Jay Shetty?

  Absolutely. I want to ask you something, though, with, on the flip side of that. You know, I've been thinking about recently this idea of how do you do things that are good for you even when you don't feel like it? Because you don't always feel like doing things that are actually good for you.

• 59:32Big Sean?

  Right.

• 59:32Jay Shetty?

  And so we try and avoid them because of how we feel right now.

• 59:36Big Sean?

  Right.

• 59:37Jay Shetty?

  How do you find yourself doing that with the gym, with meditation, with everything that you're saying? Whether it's in the studio? How have you been able to go and get over that initial feeling of, I don't want to meditate today, or I don't want to sleep early today, or I don't want to work out today? How do you work through that voice in your head?

• 59:55Big Sean?

  When it comes to self-care, it's not this, you can set a schedule, but there are times where you're gonna have to wake up earlier. You're gonna have to get right to something, right? You're gonna have to maybe meditate later on in the day. You may not even get a chance to, but that's the beauty of, first of all, it's the beauty of the short meditations that me and you went over, like the two-minute meditations, right? It doesn't have to be fifteen minutes where, you know, because I like, I take a thing, I do things where I like write my goals down. I do this, I write my intentions for the day. I med, I meditate for fifteen, twenty minutes. Then I sip my tea, you know, I take time, I take an hour to myself. And a lot of times I don't always have that, right? Sometimes I do it later in the day when I do have time.

• 1:00:38Big Sean?

  And the days that I don't have time to do that, I'll be like, well, I'm at least gonna do this. There's a bare minimum. And even if it's a two or three-minute meditation, or, to be honest with you, there have been days where I was completely exhausted and did nothing. And honestly.

• 1:01:00Big Sean?

  I deserved those days, you know, there are days where you turn your phone. I had a day that like not too long ago where I put my phone in the drawer. I had to leave it. I didn't pick it back up till like midnight and when I was about to go to sleep. And I didn't go to the studio that day. I didn't do anything. I just needed time to myself. You have to listen to yourself and when you listen to yourself, you have to ask, well, why don't I feel like doing this? Why, why, who doesn't want to take care of themselves? Right? And maybe you just need some time to just be lazy, man. That's okay.

• 1:01:31Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:32Big Sean?

  That is, that is okay, but it's the fact that you know better, when you know better, you're already headed in the right direction.

• 1:01:39Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:40Big Sean?

  So when, when you don't take care of yourself, right? When you don't work out or you don't meditate, you're gonna be like, ah, man, I don't, I, I, I feel like I should have kinda, you know?

• 1:01:49Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:01:50Big Sean?

  And it'll eventually get you right back on track, uh, if you're a disciplined person.

• 1:01:55Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:56Big Sean?

  So which I advise people to try and be disciplined with the things that give you joy.

• 1:02:00Jay Shetty?

  Hmm.

• 1:02:01Big Sean?

  You know?

• 1:02:02Jay Shetty?

  Those two things don't always, you don't feel like they go together.

• 1:02:05Big Sean?

  No, but yeah, but you gotta remember having fun is a serious thing. You know what I mean?

• 1:02:11Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:11Big Sean?

  It is. You gotta be serious about your fun.

• 1:02:14Jay Shetty?

  That, that is actually it.

• 1:02:16Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:16Jay Shetty?

  We got there. That, that was the idea of how you strike that balance.

• 1:02:20Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:21Jay Shetty?

  You gotta be disciplined about your joy. Fun is a serious thing.

• 1:02:25Big Sean?

  For sure, man.

• 1:02:26Jay Shetty?

  And I think that's what we lose. We go, no, fun just needs to be completely random.

• 1:02:31Big Sean?

  Mm hmm.

• 1:02:31Jay Shetty?

  And then, you know, joy needs to be completely random.

• 1:02:36Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:36Jay Shetty?

  But no, it's that concentrated focused creation and development of that.

• 1:02:42Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:43Jay Shetty?

  That goes in our life. At, at this point in your life, you know, we, we talked about this last time. We talked about your journey.

• 1:02:48Big Sean?

  Hmm.

• 1:02:48Jay Shetty?

  We talked about where you got to, the reflection you had, the mountain you climbed and then looked around and was like, well, is this it? Like this, you know?

• 1:02:57Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:58Jay Shetty?

  At this point in your life. What have your new dreams, heart space been like? Like what's been going on in your heart and mind about who you wanna be and what you wanna do? And what you wanna create? This episode is brought to you by Amtrak. You know that feeling when you're already tired and you haven't even gotten there yet? That's where Amtrak comes in. Leave the driving behind and settle into a comfortable seat with plenty of room to stretch out. Catch up on work with wifi, grab a snack at the cafe car, or just sit back and enjoy your favourite podcast. Choose a cellar or North East Regional and get there without the stress of getting there. Visit amtrak.com to plan your next trip. This episode is brought to you by Wayfair.

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• 1:05:20Big Sean?

  Man, I've really just been like, okay, how can I impact the world at this point? Cause I'm in a position, right? I have a platform. I've done a lot of things I wanted to do musically, right? I've experienced like so many beautiful things. And I remember all I wanted was a song on the radio, right? But I didn't limit myself to that, right? By just being so specific. I always was like, I want a song, whatever else I can get, you know, whatever else comes with that. And so lately, I've just been thinking, how can I impact the world? How can I use my platform to change the world and look back and be like, wow, that was something that meant something? That's something that my grandkids can look at and say, man, granddad really did that,

• 1:06:05Big Sean?

  you know? And make that impact to people or listeners or anyone that's tuned into my frequency. You know what I mean? How can I impact them? How can I make the best use of this opportunity, this life I have, this body I have? That's, that's kind of where my motivation has been at. So I put that into my music. I put that into, okay, we're getting my book together. I put that into, you know, since these COVID restrictions are up, it's kind of like, how do I want to see people live? Yeah, and you've been at Coachella this year. Yeah, Coachella's coming up. Yeah, like what experience do I want to give people? Yeah. You know, and also to not take away from what makes me happy. And you know, that's being with the people I love, you know? Just figuring out how we can change the world and aligning my people, my team with that.

• 1:06:50Big Sean?

  And you know, I'm looking forward to just living life. I'm looking forward to starting a family at the right time. All right. Yay. Yeah. We've got to time that. Yeah. It's all on God's time. Sync up. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Yeah, relationships are deep, boy. They are deep. But, but that is, uh, that is to me like. Where I'm at in my life. You know what I mean? I'm not really trying. I'm not in the same place I was when I was a teenager, when I was in my twenties. It's I'm in a whole different way of, okay, how can I impact the world?

• 1:07:22Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 1:07:22Big Sean?

  You know what I mean? Uh, with, with the opportunity that I've been given, with this platform I've been given.

• 1:07:27Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. And that, and that's such a brilliant acceptance because for so many people, when they get up the first mountain, it becomes about the second mountain. And then the third mountain. And then the fourth mountain. And they just keep climbing mountains.

• 1:07:41Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:07:42Jay Shetty?

  And it doesn't change how they feel. And so for you to already have that realization and go, the real mountain I want to climb is the impact and the service and the, the joy and the happiness, that's, that's a beautiful thing. And we were talking about this earlier offline, but about relationships. And you know, your relationships, obviously with Janay was something that you've been investing in.

• 1:08:01Big Sean?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:08:01Jay Shetty?

  Like it's been a, it's been a commitment. It's been an investment. Obviously we've spent time together and she's been an amazing guest on the show as well.

• 1:08:08Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:09Jay Shetty?

  I actually met her first before I met you.

• 1:08:10Big Sean?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. And. She was the one who told me like, you gotta meet.

• 1:08:14Jay Shetty?

  And she's incredible, like, you know, and when I found out you two were together, I was like, this makes so much sense. But, but walk me through, whatever you feel comfortable with, walk me through some of the, the journeys in, in what it's meant to create a conscious partnership. And what's the real work that goes be behind that? Because you know, we all have our baggage and our trauma and our issues from our past relationships, our parents, so many things. What, what's gone into crafting and what you're trying to craft?

• 1:08:43Big Sean?

  Wow, that's, that's really deep too about, let's make sure we touch back on like traumas and.

• 1:08:49Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:49Big Sean?

  Um, things that we inherit from our parents, you know, because we inherit. I'm, I'm, actually I'll do that. We'll talk about that now, then I can go to that like.

• 1:08:58Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:59Big Sean?

  One of the things I've had to do in my life is clear some of the blockages that I've had. And you know, all in different ways, all through different people. And that's something that I may want to get more detailed in with people too. Because people are going to say, well, how do I clear these blockages within me? And there are many, many ways and many people that, peoples that I've met with that have been able to, you know, help me. And you know, I used to have a worryment of money was one of them. Just like you can inherit. Your parents' hair, or you can inherit their eyes, or you can inherit their, you know, I remember my dad used to be like, "Oh, I used to smile just like you do," you know, so you can inherit a smile, you can also inherit someone's fears, you can also inherit

• 1:09:42Big Sean?

  someone's beliefs that aren't in alignment with, you know, your own and you feel very conflicted, uh, you can inherit, uh, just a lot of, you can inherit, uh, pain, you can inherit racism, and you could be like, "Well, I'm not a racist person," but I know, I know someone who's like, "Bro, I'm not a racist person," but then they call every black person a kid, you know, that's a good kid, and I'm like, "You gotta watch yourself a little bit, man," it's like, you know, just pay attention to that, because you don't refer to people who are, who look like you as a kid.

• 1:10:15Jay Shetty?

  Hmm.

• 1:10:16Big Sean?

  And you might refer to somebody who's a kid that's the same age, almost the same age as you, you know, so it's like, you inherit these things, you may not even realize it, right, and it's important to just do the work on yourself because to push the next, it's like also breaking generational curses, it's like, I broke one of the blockages I had, and now my family, uh, we are living, we are getting more of our dreams out, my mom is doing things that she never thought she would do, my dad, my brother, you know, um, we grew up in debt essentially, and we, I had to break that, that was one of the blocks I had to break, was, uh, the block of not be scared to have money, feel like there's a scarcity of money, and it's not, you know, it's all just energy, right, and

• 1:11:00Big Sean?

  you can have as much energy as needed, and, uh, to clear all these blocks, but, um, to get back to my point, it is so important to go through these blocks and these traumas, because when you pass it on to not only just the next generation, you pass it on to the people around you, your friends, your family, you know, you are, you are the company you keep, and the more like-minded, the better you are, the better everyone around you is including your family, right, and you guys can have the opportunity to do anything that is possible, anything you want, any, any empire, any business, any ownership, things that you didn't even know was imaginable, but it all starts with you working on yourself, and that's the importance of.

• 1:11:46Big Sean?

  You know, the traumas, it's almost like, well, why would I want to correct, you know, cancer runs in our family, breast cancer runs in our family, why would I want to correct that? Well, you want to correct that so you don't pass it on. And you know, the vibration of cancer is a low vibration, you know what I'm saying? So, you know, uh, it's important to take care of ourselves and get rid of that trauma, but okay.

• 1:12:06Jay Shetty?

  That was beautiful, but I'm so glad you went there.

• 1:12:08Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:12:08Jay Shetty?

  I'm so happy you went there because that, the idea of being aware of what we're inheriting is so important, especially when you went, that we are aware of, we inherit what we wear and how we think and how we look, but then how we behave, how we communicate, how we talk to people, how we think about people.

• 1:12:26Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:12:26Jay Shetty?

  How we think about women, how we think about men, how we think about.

• 1:12:29Big Sean?

  Oh, that's a good one. How you think about women and men?

• 1:12:31Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 1:12:32Big Sean?

  You know, that's another thing.

• 1:12:33Jay Shetty?

  Or, or them, how you think about trans, how you think about LGBTQ, like, just like every, just how we think about other.

• 1:12:39Big Sean?

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:12:40Jay Shetty?

  I'm so glad you went there. I just wanted to say that. I'm so happy you took us on that.

• 1:12:43Big Sean?

  Yeah. I can just imagine like aliens or people from another world being like, man, these people really tripped that they're, have different shades of skin. They really be like.

• 1:12:54Jay Shetty?

  It's just.

• 1:12:54Big Sean?

  They really kill each other over this, like, you know, I've never seen a cow look at another cow and be like, you're a brown cow, you're a black and white cow. I don't want to be around you. Like, no, they don't know. It's like, you know, and it makes me realize that like, if we kill each other and hate each other over things like that, or who we love, right? Or things that even have nothing to do with us, then I wonder how we would handle an extraterrestrial or an alien, or really something that is really different, like, you know, I always am like, maybe that's why the government or whoever doesn't ever want to really break it to humanity, because who, how are we going to react, you know? But that's a whole nother conversation. Well, I wanted to ask you something about relationships, because you go through times where you don't see your wife all the time.

• 1:13:38Big Sean?

  And how important is distance in a relationship, you know? Because I know some people may feel guilty like not being with their partner all the time, or maybe even enjoying time away, you know, that, that could be a guilt thing, like, oh, man, I'm really having a good time by myself, or also spending too much time with your partner and losing a sense of who you are and your individual self, so. As you, I look at your relationship, you guys are a beautiful couple, you know what I mean? And I'm not saying that in idolizing that or anything, but that's just me making a, you know, recognizing that.

• 1:14:14Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, it's my friend, yeah.

• 1:14:15Big Sean?

  Yeah, how do, um, how do you balance the distance in your relationship and is that necessary?

• 1:14:23Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, I think for us, and I agree with you by the way, like, I don't, there is no such thing as a perfect couple, perfect marriage, perfect relationship. So we should remove that idolization.

• 1:14:34Big Sean?

  Period.

• 1:14:35Jay Shetty?

  Just with everything, just as we were talking about earlier. I've found that, I'll take a bit of a detour, but I find that as humans, we like to idolize or we like to demonize. So we demonize people.

• 1:14:48Big Sean?

  Woo!

• 1:14:49Jay Shetty?

  We go, "You are terrible, you're wrong, you're the worst." Or we go, "You're the best, I love you and I adore you." And sometimes the people we idolize become the same people we demonize when they let us down.

• 1:15:00Big Sean?

  All the time.

• 1:15:00Jay Shetty?

  All the time. And so we don't have this ability, which what we talked about as monks was neutralized. How do you just neutralize everything and look at it for what it is? And look at it for the reality of it, rather than idolize or demonize it, just learn to accept. So when I look at my relationship, we found that when we first got married, I'd say in the first two years of our marriage, so my wife and I have been married for six years, and next year we will have been together for 10 years. We've been together for nine years now, in total. And the first two years of our marriage, I reckon we spent in total six to eight months apart in two years. And the reason for that was because my wife missed her family in London.

• 1:15:43Jay Shetty?

  We'd moved to New York because of my career.

• 1:15:46Big Sean?

  Right.

• 1:15:46Jay Shetty?

  And I wanted her to be with her family, to be happy, but I also wanted to be in New York so that I could build my career and build my purpose.

• 1:15:54Big Sean?

  Right.

• 1:15:55Jay Shetty?

  And so that became-

• 1:15:56Big Sean?

  Which is all valid.

• 1:15:57Jay Shetty?

  Which is all valid. She wanted to be with her family, which I respect and love, and I wanted to be here. And I said to her, I said, "I will fly back every weekend, every month if I have to, if that's what's gonna keep this marriage together." Because I don't think you should give up what you care about, and I'm not gonna give up what I care about. We both should not give up what we care about the most because we care about each other.

• 1:16:21Big Sean?

  Can you, oh my gosh, see, one of the things, not to cut you off, but people always say- Oh, you have to give things, you have to sacrifice so much, you have to let go like. No, you can't sacrifice yourself to the point where it's it's a it's torture. You know, you can't sacrifice yourself to where you're not yourself anymore.

• 1:16:41Jay Shetty?

  That.

• 1:16:42Big Sean?

  You know what I mean? And that's that's really important, not to cut you off, I just wanted to add that in there.

• 1:16:45Jay Shetty?

  Dude, everything you just added, I'm like that because that's the fine line. You just gave the fine line of. You can't compromise when compromise becomes torture.

• 1:16:56Big Sean?

  Hmm.

• 1:16:57Jay Shetty?

  Compromise is healthy. Everyone has to compromise. I may cancel a dinner, or I may reschedule my weekend. Like, that's compromise. That's.

• 1:17:04Big Sean?

  And that's just being in tune with yourself.

• 1:17:05Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, exactly. But you you just defined it perfectly. Like, you can't sacrifice does not lead. If I gave up the pursuit of my purpose in New York, I would have been sad, depressed and tortured, using your words. And if my wife was kept away from her family and couldn't travel back to see them because I didn't want her to, because she had to be with me in New York, she would have been tortured and trapped. I don't want that as my loving relationship.

• 1:17:36Big Sean?

  No, that's not a union.

• 1:17:37Jay Shetty?

  Exactly, that's not a union. And so what we found is that we got used to it, but we've got better at it.

• 1:17:43Big Sean?

  Hmm.

• 1:17:44Jay Shetty?

  So at that time, we got used to it, but what happened is we would really disconnect. This was a mistake. We would really disconnect.

• 1:17:51Big Sean?

  Hmm.

• 1:17:51Jay Shetty?

  We would barely talk, barely check in. And then when we'd get back together, it almost felt like we were strangers again.

• 1:17:58Big Sean?

  Wow.

• 1:17:58Jay Shetty?

  And so that wasn't, it wasn't good or bad. I just think we had to get better. Like, today it's changed.

• 1:18:04Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:18:04Jay Shetty?

  And so I just want to put that out there, that when we first got married and we did that, I don't think we had the healthiest version of distance. And this is my point, that you can evolve and grow and learn. And then it was COVID, right? So during the pandemic, we lived together for two years and we saw each other every day. And that was amazing. It was actually brilliant, because that was the first time in our lives that we'd spent every day together for two years. And it was beautiful. We we loved it. And now, this year, I will have been away from my wife when she finally gets back. Uh, but she's been working in London. I've been in L A, where, where we currently both live. But she's been, we would have been apart for around four months. And maybe we've seen each other once in four months, hopefully.

• 1:18:45Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:18:46Jay Shetty?

  We'll go on this mini-vacation together. I feel this time, we've both found a healthier way of being distant. So she's in London because she's working, and that's her purpose. I'm in L A because that's where my purpose is. Again, I respect her purpose, and she respects mine. I value her values, and she values mine. And if I had to give up mine and be there for four months, or she had to give up hers and be here for four months, I wouldn't feel happy, because I know she's not happy. And she wouldn't feel happy because she knows I'm not happy. So what we've realized is that in the times we're apart, we can both be more productive.

• 1:19:29Jay Shetty?

  We get to catch up with our own friends and deepen those bonds and connection, because we both have more time.

• 1:19:35Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:19:35Jay Shetty?

  I find that I miss her every day. I have never texted my wife this much since we were dating. I haven't called her this much since we were dating. Because now it's like, I wake up in the morning, the first person I call is her.

• 1:19:46Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:19:47Jay Shetty?

  I don't do that. She's next to me, right?

• 1:19:49Big Sean?

  Right, right, right.

• 1:19:49Jay Shetty?

  Uh, the last thing at night, I know she's already asleep in London, but I'm messaging her messages so that when she wakes up in the morning, they're the first thing she sees.

• 1:19:57Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:19:57Jay Shetty?

  It adds a beautiful dynamic, and there's something really beautiful in the Bhakti tradition, which is based on love and devotion to the universe, to the divine. And it talks about how love in connection is beautiful, but love in separation is one of the most beautiful experiences. To want to be back with your beloved and the person that you love, that's what all the songs are about.

• 1:20:22Big Sean?

  Yeah, that's what all the songs are about, yeah.

• 1:20:24Jay Shetty?

  That's what all the music's about, like the, the missing of someone, the yearning of someone, the, the separation from a loved one. Is sometimes where you get to experience the deepest joy and even process some of your biggest fears and weaknesses. And that's what I find that when I'm away from my wife, I have to process my weaknesses and my fears head-on.

• 1:20:47Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:20:47Jay Shetty?

  And that I find to be joyful because it deepens my love for her. And so I personally find that distance and personal time is critical. And the way I define it for someone in a week, because someone may say, well, Jay, we don't work like you guys where we're away from each other for months because we live in the same home. We don't have careers that take us across the world. I believe, and I've been planning this out, that here's an ideal seven day week, right?

• 1:21:17Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:21:18Jay Shetty?

  You should ideally spend one to two days by yourself, with yourself. Even if you're married, even if you're dating, have two nights a week that are for you.

• 1:21:28Big Sean?

  Mm hmm. Even if you're in the same house.

• 1:21:30Jay Shetty?

  Same house, have two nights being separate that is for you to listen to your inner voice. That's two nights a week. Now have two nights that are together, just you two. Date nights, experiments, events, whatever it is, but just you two, so that you develop and you water your intimacy. That's four nights. And you've got three nights left. In those other three nights, one night you spend with your own friends. So she's with her friends, I'm with my friends. And then the other two nights, we're with a collective group of friends, friends that we share. Now you can make your own ratio of your seven days, but notice how the ideal seven days include time alone,

• 1:22:10Jay Shetty?

  time with each other, time with your own friends and family, and time with collective friends and family.

• 1:22:16Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:22:17Jay Shetty?

  If we can't look at our lives and say we do all of those, it means we're not watering a really important part of our relationships. If I don't water myself, I've got nothing to do.

• 1:22:26Big Sean?

  That's gonna come up later. And that you're gonna feel is hurting you. What you're talking from is from experience. I could see like, this isn't like a textbook formula. This isn't some, this is some experience that you guys have been through and that you made it through. So I respect that. And I realize that, uh, you know, the crazy thing about being in a relationship and having distance between you is it really can bring you closer to the one that you're missing, you know, it kinda is almost, I would say, almost a great test to see how close you really are. You know what I mean? Because. Being like being so far from someone can bring you so much closer. You can learn so much about someone, you know, through texting them more through the phone

• 1:23:10Big Sean?

  as opposed to waking up next to them every day. So I think it's beautiful to give each other that time apart. And that's when you really know when that person is still all you want. That that's, that's who that's special for, you know? I definitely have been able to experience that. So that's, that's a beautiful thing, you know? And it's, it's a key part in any relationship. I think in any marriage, the key to it is, is having some distance between. You know what I mean? And uh,

• 1:23:39Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 1:23:40Big Sean?

  And having someone who you energetically match with.

• 1:23:43Jay Shetty?

  Yes.

• 1:23:44Big Sean?

  You know, one thing that

• 1:23:45Jay Shetty?

  That's the most important thing.

• 1:23:46Big Sean?

  That's the most important thing right there. Because this is funny because I don't know how to even say this.

• 1:23:51Jay Shetty?

  Say it.

• 1:23:51Big Sean?

  Say this properly or I don't know, whatever. But I'm gonna just say like, when you have sex with someone who you feel are, you guys are equally energetically on the same level. That's how it's really supposed to be, right? Because in other, in, in other ways, I just hope people realize that because if not, if you're not with someone who you energetically feel like you're on the same level with, then that person could be taken away from you. It could throw you off track. It could uninspire you. It could do all these crazy things. So it's important to realize um, the power of that energy.

• 1:24:30Jay Shetty?

  Definitely.

• 1:24:31Big Sean?

  That you have when you, when you with somebody who can match your energy.

• 1:24:34Jay Shetty?

  Definitely.

• 1:24:35Big Sean?

  Sexually.

• 1:24:36Jay Shetty?

  No, absolutely. And I, I'm so glad you raised that because so the Sanskrit word for celibacy is brahmacharya. Now celibacy in the Western world feels, sounds like abstaining from sex. That's what you think of the word celibacy. Brahmacharya, it translates as the proper use or direction of energy.

• 1:24:57Jay Shetty?

  When you talk about a poor energy exchange, when you're just wasting energy, when there isn't an equal energetic exchange.

• 1:25:04Big Sean?

  Right.

• 1:25:05Jay Shetty?

  That's why we feel drained, we feel depleted, we feel.

• 1:25:09Big Sean?

  Or afterwards, you're like, oh, this is a waste of my time.

• 1:25:11Jay Shetty?

  Totally, yeah.

• 1:25:12Big Sean?

  Any, however you feel like.

• 1:25:13Jay Shetty?

  Or many years later it takes.

• 1:25:15Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:25:15Jay Shetty?

  But when you have someone of equal energy exchange, that impression is so much more powerful and deeper. And so I'm, I'm glad you brought that up because I guess the question though is like, obviously, when you meet someone, we're all at different stages, even in our vibrational energy.

• 1:25:32Big Sean?

  Right.

• 1:25:33Jay Shetty?

  How do you know? Because today, we live in a world where anyone can use the language. Everyone can say the word energy.

• 1:25:41Big Sean?

  Right, right, right.

• 1:25:41Jay Shetty?

  Everyone can use the word vibration.

• 1:25:43Big Sean?

  Uh huh, right.

• 1:25:43Jay Shetty?

  Everyone can use all the lingo and you think, oh yeah, yeah, this person like they've been reading about chakras and da, da, da, right?

• 1:25:51Big Sean?

  Mm hmm.

• 1:25:52Jay Shetty?

  How, how do you actually know that someone is of a similar energy? In a relationship, like how, how do you, how do you look for that? Because, and I don't think there's a formula or there's a perfect science. I'm just saying, how do you look for that? Or how have you found that and looked for that?

• 1:26:06Big Sean?

  It's only one way, feeling it. It's simple as that. You can, it's something you feel. And you have to really be in tune with yourself, right? That's another reason why working on yourself is so important because the more you're in tune with yourself, the more you're able to feel like this isn't right, right? And it could make sense in a lot of other ways. You could be like, oh, this person is my ideal of like the perfect person in my head, you know, like physically, but it just doesn't. Well, I don't care. Like you disregard those feelings when you put that egotistical spin on things, right? Or you put the like, the image or like the expectations or things, check marks you think you should be hitting, but it's really just a feeling process.

• 1:26:44Big Sean?

  And when you realize, you know, when you have the feeling of that feeling like you're being productive, you know? Like I'm not ever, ever gonna like physically be involved with anyone if, if it's not productive, you know? And I, and I feel like I'm being productive, you know what I mean? Um, and that's how you should feel with your partner. Like you feel like you're being productive, you know? And you feel you have a good feeling about it.

• 1:27:10Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 1:27:10Big Sean?

  Yeah, anything else is just kind of like, you know? You think that you made eh eh fun.

• 1:27:18Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 1:27:18Big Sean?

  Eh fun, eh it's fun.

• 1:27:20Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 1:27:20Big Sean?

  You know, if it's not fun, productive and all these things and you know, if you feel weird or feel like you're wasting your time afterwards and and that's probably not right for you, you know, and you could eventually kid yourself for a little while, but eventually you're gonna move on or something's gonna happen and you know.

• 1:27:37Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, I think one of the things I look for in energy exchange in in every level is the idea of, you know, it's almost like how long have your energies been invested together deeply? When my career started to take off, I would often point to an achievement and look at my wife and say, love me for this.

• 1:27:57Big Sean?

  Right.

• 1:27:57Jay Shetty?

  Look what I did.

• 1:27:58Big Sean?

  Right.

• 1:27:59Jay Shetty?

  And then I'd win another award and be like, look at this, like, love me for this. And she wouldn't feel anything, she wouldn't, she wouldn't respect me for, like, she wouldn't care about that.

• 1:28:10Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:28:10Jay Shetty?

  Not that she wouldn't respect me, she wouldn't care about that.

• 1:28:12Big Sean?

  She wouldn't care about that.

• 1:28:13Jay Shetty?

  And.

• 1:28:14Big Sean?

  She would be happy for you.

• 1:28:15Jay Shetty?

  She'd be happy for me, but she didn't care about that.

• 1:28:17Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:28:17Jay Shetty?

  She didn't love me for that, but I was saying, validate me for this, love me for this. And then I realized that I was trying to get her to love me for what my achievements are, when she loved me for who I am.

• 1:28:31Big Sean?

  Isn't that beautiful?

• 1:28:32Jay Shetty?

  Like, that was the most deepest reminder to me that my wife's been with me since when I was in twenty five thousand dollars worth of debt, when we were four months away from being broke, when I was pursuing my purpose and no one cared and I had five people turn up to hear me speak. And my wife's been through all of that and she loved me then and she loves me now, but she's never been enamored by the achievements or the successes. She has always exchanged energy with me on the level of she loves who I am. So she had to love me that way to remind myself to love myself that way. And I think that's what I look at as energy exchange is, does someone remind me to love myself through how they love me?

• 1:29:19Jay Shetty?

  Like does the way they love me remind me to love myself for the real reasons?

• 1:29:23Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:29:23Jay Shetty?

  And that, you know, that is just undefeatable. Like that you can't beat. That's the champion of love.

• 1:29:28Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:29:29Jay Shetty?

  Because you're like, you're teaching me how to love myself based on what I actually should love myself for.

• 1:29:35Big Sean?

  Man, that's again, talking from experience.

• 1:29:37Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, it's, yeah, it's, it's, it's real. Like I've, I have been that man that has wanted the validation of my wife for my medals and my honors. And when she didn't give it to me, I felt frustrated.

• 1:29:48Big Sean?

  Wow.

• 1:29:48Jay Shetty?

  Because I felt, well, I can get more attention from somewhere else for these things. But then you go, but then do I want attention or do I want affection? Like, do I want validation or do I want someone to value me?

• 1:30:02Big Sean?

  Mm hmm. Because validation is conditional.

• 1:30:05Jay Shetty?

  It's conditional, man.

• 1:30:05Big Sean?

  And come and go quick. It's like wears off. It's like a, it's like a new sweater or something, right? Like you have to eventually wash it and it starts to deteriorate. And um, as opposed to loving someone for who they are, that's, that's more like unbreakable, right?

• 1:30:21Jay Shetty?

  Underfield, underfield.

• 1:30:23Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:30:24Jay Shetty?

  Sean, what have I not asked you today? What's been on your mind, your heart? Where have we not gone? Because I feel like, I know it's hard to say this, but I really do believe this. Because the last time we were getting to know each other, where we've gone today.

• 1:30:38Big Sean?

  We've gone to some places.

• 1:30:39Jay Shetty?

  We have gone to some places today. Like as in this is without a doubt. Even though it's hard to say this, it's even better than the first conversation because of our openness.

• 1:30:48Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:30:48Jay Shetty?

  Because we have a relationship, a deeper relationship today. And so

• 1:30:51Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:30:51Jay Shetty?

  What the way, the places we've gone to and the things you've said today, I'm gonna have to listen back to this one.

• 1:30:57Big Sean?

  Keep doing what you're doing, man. Like the job you're doing is fantastic. Like I tune into so many of your interviews. I love your book. Um, I can't wait to have you write the foreword on my book.

• 1:31:09Jay Shetty?

  I'm in.

• 1:31:10Big Sean?

  You know what I'm saying? And.

• 1:31:13Big Sean?

  Just to everyone listening, man, you know, I know you're going through whatever you're going through. Just do the best you can, stay strong, um, don't give up on yourself, you know, that's me. There's no losing, you know, you can, you can maybe think you're losing, but you only lose when you stop. You know what I mean? There's no, no such thing as, as losing if you don't stop. It's only just learning and like developing and, and getting that experience and wiser. You know, you're just sharpening a sword, being more of a master. So, you know, stay strong and everyone. I know some people, uh, don't know where they're gonna even sleep tonight. Some people are going through a cri- a real, a real crisis in their life. And just know that I'm not just saying this to be politically correct or anything like.

• 1:31:59Big Sean?

  I really am sending you guys love. I really am sending you guys like some light and, uh, you know, that miracles can happen in your life and you accept that, you know, accept, please like, accept your miracle, cause they happen every, every day. And, um, yeah, thank you, you know, it's a, I don't know what else. There's new music.

• 1:32:18Jay Shetty?

  That is beautiful.

• 1:32:19Big Sean?

  Yeah, new stuff coming out and, yeah, I don't know what else to say.

• 1:32:23Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, I mean, everyone make sure you go and subscribe across all of Big Sean's platforms. Whether it's YouTube, whether it's Instagram, it's Facebook, Spotify, Apple, wherever you're listening.

• 1:32:35Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:32:35Jay Shetty?

  Uh, look out for him at Coachella this year. The new music is dropping right now.

• 1:32:39Big Sean?

  Crazy.

• 1:32:40Jay Shetty?

  Is music dropping around the birthday as well?

• 1:32:41Big Sean?

  I don't know around the birthday, but probably more so around Coachella.

• 1:32:45Jay Shetty?

  Okay, around Coachella, okay.

• 1:32:46Big Sean?

  I'm thinking, I got some new music. I'm trying to see if I'm gonna like preview it there or put it out right before.

• 1:32:50Jay Shetty?

  Got it, got it.

• 1:32:51Big Sean?

  You know, figure it out, figuring it out. Me and Janae have new music coming too together. So, our 2088 project.

• 1:32:56Jay Shetty?

  Yes. We can talk about that more deeply if you wanna go into it, or you wanna give him the preview.

• 1:33:01Big Sean?

  That's, you know, maybe me and her could come and do a special one together.

• 1:33:04Jay Shetty?

  I would love that. Oh, that would be sick. Let's do that.

• 1:33:06Big Sean?

  Or maybe all four of us. That would be great.

• 1:33:08Jay Shetty?

  We'd love that. Let's do that. That would be so dope.

• 1:33:09Big Sean?

  That's another time, but, um, cause I don't wanna speak for her.

• 1:33:12Jay Shetty?

  Yes, yes, yes, yes.

• 1:33:13Big Sean?

  You know, that's our, that's our thing together, but I can just let people know that it's coming and what else? I mean, you know, just keep doing it and thanks, thanks for all the love on the last one. I gotta say, thank you for the love on the last, uh, podcast we did. It was crazy and. Man, congrats to you, men- mental hea- uh, on the men's, men's health magazine, is it uh, it's Men's Health, right?

• 1:33:34Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, it's Men's Health, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:33:35Big Sean?

  Men's Health magazine, that's major, bro.

• 1:33:37Jay Shetty?

  Well, bro, it's just amazing.

• 1:33:38Big Sean?

  Changing the whole narrative.

• 1:33:39Jay Shetty?

  Doing it with you is amazing, like, I think, you know, you, you said that what we're doing is amazing here, but this is energizing.

• 1:33:46Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:33:46Jay Shetty?

  Like, this is energy exchange at its highest level, because you, you, you keep me going too, man, like, having this relationship with you and having these conversations with you, that energizes me, it affirms my belief in what I'm trying to do.

• 1:33:58Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:33:59Jay Shetty?

  And so.

• 1:33:59Big Sean?

  Yeah, I see, like, billboards of you everywhere and stuff, like, calm app, I'm like, yo, Jay is going crazy right now, Will Smith, man, that was, what a crazy moment that had to be.

• 1:34:09Jay Shetty?

  That was, uh, working with him has been one of the greatest joys.

• 1:34:12Big Sean?

  Isn't he great?

• 1:34:13Jay Shetty?

  Greatest joys in my life, he is one of the most special human beings, as are you, uh, in, in the world, and just.

• 1:34:19Big Sean?

  He's anointed, he's, like, has a glow on him, right? He really does, yeah, shout out Will.

• 1:34:23Jay Shetty?

  And it's real, and it's real, like, he's, you know, him and the whole family, just amazing.

• 1:34:27Big Sean?

  No, you can tell, he's, like, human.

• 1:34:28Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 1:34:29Big Sean?

  You know what I mean, and, uh, yeah, keep up, keep up the great work, man, I'll see you next time.

• 1:34:33Jay Shetty?

  Thank you, man, everyone who's been, uh, watching at home, what I want you to do, like you did last time, is show up on Twitter and Instagram, tag us on what resonated with you, what connected with you. There were so many incredible nuggets of wisdom today that Sean dropped, and we went back and forth, and we grappled with, and then you saw our thought pattern, then we finally got there. Like, there was, like, this whole journey that we went on today, and we hope that this conversation inspires conversations back at home. When I started making content, my whole goal was, I wanted to create stuff that you could send to your friend and say, this is what we were talking about last night.

• 1:35:10Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:35:10Jay Shetty?

  That this is what we're thinking about, and I wanted to create something for you that helped you have deeper, more meaningful conversations with your friends that you might not always get to have, so I hope that this starts millions of conversations around the world that deepen your bond with your friends, your loved ones, that allow you to have more compassion and love for each other and the world, and ultimately, as Sean's been saying the whole time today, allow ourselves to not judge, to, to really understand. understand that everyone's going through something. So thank you for listening to On Purpose.

• 1:35:41Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:35:41Jay Shetty?

  Thank you to our main man Big Sean for turning up today. New music Coachella.

• 1:35:45Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:35:46Jay Shetty?

  Uh, so much more and there will be a part three. So thank you everyone.

• 1:35:50Big Sean?

  Can't wait.

• 1:35:50Jay Shetty?

  Amazing. Thank you, man. That was dope, bro.

• 1:35:53Big Sean?

  Yeah.

• 1:36:03Speaker 02

  Now, more than ever, we need someone on our side. But Rob Whitman? Whitman's votes drove up costs, cut Medicaid and risked 350,000 Virginians healthcare to pay for tax breaks for himself and his donors. He's not on our side. Shannon Taylor will fight corruption, cut taxes and bring down costs. This November, vote for Shannon Taylor. She's for us. Paid for by HMP, the House Majority PAC dot com, not authorized by any candidate or candidate's committee.

• 1:36:32Speaker 03

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• 1:36:47Speaker 04

  Mr. President, my company tore me of the explosion on our rig on October 2nd. Causing massive water displacement and triggering a tsunami. They all heap the blame on me.

• 1:36:57Speaker 05

  Tom Cruise is. Digger got us into this mess and Digger's gonna dig us out. From the director of Birdman and the Revenant.

• 1:37:04Speaker 04

  What would happen if I stopped drilling? You stop, you freeze it, that's what.

• 1:37:08Speaker 05

  With great power comes great deniability.

• 1:37:11Speaker 04

  I'm not the first nanny.

• 1:37:13Speaker 05

  Digger. See the trailer online. Only in theaters October 2nd. Rated R. Under 17. Not a minute without parent.