Pod Insights The School of Greatness Shadow Work: The Hidden Part of You Running Your Life | Katie Clarke About this episode Spiritual coach Katie Clarke explains shadow work, the process of making the unconscious conscious, detailing how unresolved childhood trauma creates shadow selves, protector parts including perfectionism, people-pleasing, and self-sabotage, and energetic frequency blocks to manifestation. Clarke introduces her Law of Displacement for belief rewiring, the Be-Do-Have order of creation from Genesis, the in-between phase of personal transformation, and masculine versus feminine energy polarity. References include the quantum double-slit experiment, Bob Proctor, Myron Golden, and Genesis 1.
Transcript 15,534 words · 2 speakers
Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.
0:00 Speaker 00 We all have a shadow self. It's the unconscious self. And the way that the shadow self is created is in moments of trauma.
0:08 Speaker 00 In order to cope with the distress in the moment, our psyche fragments. So let's say you were quite young and you came home and you wanted to show something to your mom. You're like, wow, look at this, look what I made. And she's really critical. That's not resolved in the moment. No one came and told you, hey, it's okay. You know what? That's amazing what you did. So your psyche tries to resolve that for you by creating a fragmentation. And this is how the shadow self starts to be born.
0:30 Lewis Howes? She's a spiritual coach who is here to teach you how to stop chasing your desires and instead start magnetically attracting you to them. Please welcome Katie Clark.
0:41 Speaker 00 The real keys I want to give people is the fact that you can heal this stuff. It doesn't have to define you for your whole life. And in fact, there's a lot of freedom on the other side of facing and integrating this stuff.
0:54 Lewis Howes? How does that look like when you're working with the part of yourself that doesn't feel enough?
0:58 Speaker 00 So facing these parts of yourself, it starts with admitting them.
1:04 Lewis Howes? You know, you talk a lot about shadow work. What is shadow work in practical terms? And why do so many people avoid it, even when you think they really need it?
1:13 Speaker 00 Okay, so shadow work is essentially the process of making the unconscious conscious. So we all have a shadow self. It's the unconscious self. And the way that the shadow self is created is in moments of trauma, which is a distress that can be resolved in the moment. And when the stressful event happens, essentially, in order to cope with the distress in the moment, our consciousness, our psyche, fragments, okay? So let's say you were quite young and you came home and you wanted to show something to your mom. You're really excited to show something to your mom. You're like, wow, look at this, look what I made. And she's really critical. Like, she's really dismissive of you. That's not resolved in the moment. No one came and told you, hey, it's okay. You know what?
1:54 Speaker 00 That's amazing what you did. You're so clever. No one resolved that for you in the moment. So your psyche tries to resolve that for you by creating a fragmentation. And this is how the shadow self starts to be born. So in that moment, the part of you that's hurt, the part of you that feels harshly criticised, the part of you that feels like they're not enough, that part gets pushed into the dark, into the shadow. But not only that, a protector part is also born at the same time. And the protector part's role is to protect the shadow aspect from ever getting hurt like that again. So in this example, somebody who's harshly criticised by their mother, they have that part of them that maybe feels like what they do is never good enough. They might have a protector aspect of their personality who's a perfectionist.
2:36 Speaker 00 I see so many perfectionists and this is like the nuanced stuff, how perfectionism comes about. It's actually a protective identity trait.
2:43 Lewis Howes? So they don't get criticised again.
2:44 Speaker 00 So they don't get criticised again, because if I'm perfect, then nobody can criticise me. And that means I'm finally enough.
2:50 Lewis Howes? Wow.
2:51 Speaker 00 And we have, not to freak you out, but we have hundreds of these parts. Every single person has hundreds of these aspects within them, except maybe the enlightened masters. And so, like, another example of a shadow part, just to give you a variety here, could be somebody who was really expressive as a child and they used to like, I don't know, perform Britney Spears concerts for their family and in public. And they thought they were amazing. They literally thought they were Britney Spears until somebody made fun of them. So in that moment, that wasn't resolved. Nobody said, no, you are Britney Spears, you're amazing. So the fragmentation happens and the part of them that's expressive gets repressed because there's shame around their expression.
3:31 Speaker 00 And then there's a protector aspect born who's shy and quiet and doesn't speak up and people pleases and doesn't speak their truth. So we have all of these nuanced experiences. And like I said, it's not, it doesn't have to be big events. It can just be moderately distressing events that we didn't have the tools to deal with in the moment. That creates these splits within our being. So then we have this whole shadow self that's deeply unconscious. We are not aware of it. Okay, unconscious shadow, that means removed from the light of consciousness, removed from our awareness. But we have all these protector aspects. Those form our dominant personality.
4:05 Lewis Howes? Hmm.
4:06 Speaker 00 Those are the express. We have the repressed, which is the shadow. The express is the protector. Those are parts of your identity and who you think you are, but you don't realize that you're in an identity, maybe that is self-soothing. And so you you might be going throughout life and you don't feel the need to do shadow work. You don't know why it's important until maybe you set a goal. And your perfectionist, for example, is standing in the way of that goal. They're really slowing you down. You can't get anything done. You're in your head. You're overthinking. You're shut off from your creativity. And you're like, why am I like this? Why do I need to obsess over a presentation for four months? Why can't I just send it or whatever it is, right? Then it's time to look within and start to look at the shadow.
4:44 Lewis Howes? Mm hmm.
4:45 Speaker 00 And the reason people don't want to look at it is because it's painful.
4:48 Lewis Howes? Really good.
4:49 Speaker 00 So it's quite a deep reason why it's painful. I mean, it's painful because it was stored with pain, first of all. If it was stored with pain, it needs to come up with pain. When you face it, it's going to be painful. But the other reason why it's painful is because of the kind of judgment we have towards these parts. They're not, they're not parts that are societally acceptable. That's why we repress them. So we're very
5:13 Lewis Howes? It looked ugly to others.
5:14 Speaker 00 Exactly. So we're very relationally dependent species. And so anything that's shameful or not approved by the masses, we typically repress that. So it's the insecure, the ashamed, the angry, the bitter, all of those, they get pushed into the shadow. So oftentimes, we don't feel safe looking at that stuff. We don't want to admit it's part of who we are. Because fundamentally, actually, we think it's going to disconnect us from people around us if we accept that this is part of who we are. But the opposite is true.
5:41 Lewis Howes? Mm hmm.
5:42 Speaker 00 Because if this stuff is within you, it's distorting your frequency, it's disconnecting you from yourself.
5:47 Lewis Howes? You're out of alignment.
5:48 Speaker 00 You're out of alignment. And if you're disconnected from yourself, then you can't be connected with others to the level that you could be.
5:54 Lewis Howes? So what is the most, I guess, the the darkest shadow self? Part of yourself that you had to overcome? And what was the thing that caused you to kind of hold on to that shadow self?
6:08 Speaker 00 For me, I'm with the masses on this one. They're not good enough.
6:13 Lewis Howes? Like criticized?
6:15 Speaker 00 Yeah, for me, it wasn't more, I wasn't criticized. It was more that I felt like I didn't matter for my early years.
6:22 Lewis Howes? Did anyone ever say you don't matter?
6:24 Speaker 00 No.
6:25 Lewis Howes? Isn't that interesting? It's like, we feel we're not enough. No one loves us. I have no friends. I'm not likable, whatever it is. But probably no one ever said that. I mean, maybe there was some bully kid that said like, no one's gonna be your friend or whatever, but probably our parents never said you don't matter.
6:43 Speaker 00 No.
6:44 Lewis Howes? Right? But that's something you felt. You felt I don't matter.
6:48 Speaker 00 Yeah, well.
6:49 Lewis Howes? How did that show up for you then?
6:51 Speaker 00 So even if someone directly doesn't tell you you're not enough or whatever else, our child brains, they don't have the capacity to take in the full, big picture. So a child, for example, that's growing up in a family where there's a lot of conflict, they can't take into account that their parents maybe are flawed and that they have their own problems because when you're young, you look to your parents for survival.
7:12 Lewis Howes? Yeah.
7:12 Speaker 00 You literally think that your parents are God when you're young, like everything they say, you're like, yes, because it's a, it's a survival mechanism. And so if something is wrong with them or off, or there's just something wrong in general, the default response in a child's brain is there must be something wrong with me. It feels safer, weirdly enough, than to say there must be something wrong with this caregiver who I'm depending on for my survival. Yeah. So we say there must be something.
7:38 Lewis Howes? Say mom and dad are messed up, like they're really screwed up.
7:40 Speaker 00 No.
7:40 Lewis Howes? Cause then you're screwed.
7:42 Speaker 00 Exactly.
7:42 Lewis Howes? You're like, well, if they're screwed, then I'm not safe, right? It's like, so I'm messed up.
7:47 Speaker 00 Because in a weird way, it gives you a sense of control because if there's something wrong with me, maybe there's something I can do to be good enough and fix the situation.
7:55 Lewis Howes? Interesting. Maybe if I perform better, if I'm more joyful, or I can sing better, if I can get straight A's, then it's gonna fix the problem.
8:04 Speaker 00 Exactly.
8:05 Lewis Howes? But usually it never fixes the problem.
8:06 Speaker 00 No. And what it does is it creates this part of you that doesn't feel good enough. And it creates these beliefs that you're not good enough when that was never actually the case. It was never actually true. It was just your perception at the time.
8:19 Lewis Howes? Isn't it interesting how our brains as kids and most of our adolescent life just perceive something without someone actually saying it? But it's not the truth. We just perceive it as real.
8:32 Speaker 00 Yeah.
8:32 Lewis Howes? Now, there might be part of this like, oh, there was a disturbance in the house and it didn't feel settling and it was never resolved. Or we just swept things under the rug or whatever. Whenever mom came home or dad came home, we didn't say certain things, otherwise they were going to get angry like, sure, but.
8:49 Lewis Howes? Man, it's like, it's so fascinating that so many people, we, we just, our brains think this certain way. Instead of thinking, be do have, like the order of creation or like, oh, this is just a little problem they're having. Nothing is wrong with me. I'm fine. Like, you're saying we were born whole, but no one actually believes that.
9:14 Speaker 00 Yeah.
9:14 Lewis Howes? Unless they were told it over and over again. And anytime there was a disturbance, your parents came down and said, mommy and daddy love you. Nothing is wrong, like, we're just doing, this is life sometimes, but that doesn't happen for 99% of people.
9:27 Speaker 00 No, and the eye contact, all the little stuff as well.
9:30 Lewis Howes? How much eye contact should parents be having with their kids on a daily basis? For them to feel more securely attached.
9:38 Speaker 00 I don't have a statistic.
9:39 Lewis Howes? Yeah, yeah. That's interesting. Is it like minutes? Is it, is it, you know, 20 minutes, seconds? Like, I don't even know what that is.
9:46 Speaker 00 I can't remember the exact number, but.
9:48 Lewis Howes? I should look that up.
9:49 Speaker 00 You, I know you're a parent.
9:50 Lewis Howes? I've got, yeah, twin girl, seven months old that I'm like, and I will hold them and stare at them in the eyes. And I've been doing, well, I've been doing that already. I mean, but they're not going to engage, they might be looking at me for 20 seconds, but then they're like looking around and playing or doing whatever. So, but I'm really trying to like, just stare into their soul because I'm also just fascinated by the miracle of life and creation. I'm like, how did this even, how did this even come from us? It's, it's a miracle of how it's even possible. So, you know, I'm just like in the awe and wonder of it all while connecting with them. So. But yeah, I need to figure that out.
10:29 Speaker 00 I love that. Well, I I don't think you need to worry too much. I mean, there's no perfect parenting handbook.
10:33 Lewis Howes? No, I need to be perfect. I can't mess them up. I'm just kidding.
10:38 Speaker 00 That could create its own problems.
10:39 Lewis Howes? Exactly. I need to be perfect every day.
10:42 Speaker 00 I need to get it all right. Well, I don't think I don't think you need to worry about it because you've done inner work. Right? So if I were to give someone, I'm not a parent yet, but if I were to think about what I could give someone as a parenting handbook, it would be like, work on yourself and heal your own stuff, because that's really what you're gonna pass on.
10:58 Lewis Howes? And healing's a journey. You know, healing's a journey. It's not like you're gonna be perfect consistently. You're never gonna be perfect. And it's gonna be an ongoing journey of coming back into your true self. You know, when you feel triggered or feel a response to something, finding a way to feel that peace, that wholeness again, and not fall back into the shadow self that can come out from time to time.
11:21 Speaker 00 To answer your question from earlier, because it was like a two part question and answer in my mind. So my shadow part of
11:28 Lewis Howes? Criticism, is that what it was?
11:30 Speaker 00 Yeah, not feeling like I mattered, not feeling good enough. That was a really core one for me. And sometimes when you have a core one like that, like a really core wound, um, that can create multiple protector parts, not to freak anyone out.
11:44 Lewis Howes? So what was that? What was that for you then?
11:46 Speaker 00 So for me, the first thing it caused was me to attract relationships where I wasn't treated well. Right?
11:53 Lewis Howes? Because you didn't feel like you mattered, so you didn't deserve
11:55 Speaker 00 Exactly.
11:56 Lewis Howes? A relationship of
11:57 Speaker 00 Yeah.
11:57 Lewis Howes? Love and
11:58 Speaker 00 Exactly. So that was the first kind of layer. And then I started to realize, okay, this is coming from within me because of certain things that happened and I didn't feel like I had the support that I did when I was younger. So that was the first layer. But then as I kept growing, more came out of this where when I started on YouTube, this was one I didn't expect. When I started on YouTube, I posted a couple of videos and then I started sabotaging them. I couldn't post anymore. And I was like, what is going on? I felt terrible. I felt insecure. I felt inadequate. I was like, why can't I create what is up with me? And I sat down with myself, I resisted it for months, which what you do when you feel bad, you resist it. And then I was like, okay, I need to lean into this and figure out what's going on. So I sat down and I realized that there was a part of me, and this is where shadow work is hard.
12:42 Speaker 00 It can be really ugly to look at sometimes. There was a part of me, a little part of me, that wanted my first couple of YouTube videos to go viral because that would mean that I'm finally good enough.
12:52 Lewis Howes? Oh, man.
12:53 Speaker 00 Yeah. So it was going back to that same thing. So I had to sit with that part and go, hey, look, you can get a hundred views and you're still good enough and da, da, da, least that part. And for me, perfectionism as well was linked to that. So that's something I had to work through with that as well. But the, the real keys I want to give people and like the real nugget that I want people to go away with is the fact that you can heal this stuff. You absolutely can heal this stuff. And it's, it doesn't have to define you for your whole life. And in fact, there's a lot of freedom on the other side of facing and integrating this stuff.
13:24 Lewis Howes? Yes. So when you started to self sabotage, like it sounds like for a decade, you were wanting to be on YouTube and creating videos and putting yourself out there, but something stopped you. And then you finally like, I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna take action and you do a few videos. And then all of a sudden you say, actually, I'm not getting the response I wish I would have gotten. I thought that a bigger response would have made me feel better. It's not making me feel better. So now I stop. I'm giving up essentially. What did you have to let go of from that time of self sabotaging and stopping into restarting again and committing to the process, no matter what the outcome would be?
14:05 Speaker 00 I had to let go of the part of me that wanted me to blow up on YouTube so that I would finally feel special and good enough. I had to talk to that part of me and let her know, hey, you are special and good enough. Even if you get a hundred views, that's fine. So I worked with her and she calmed down.
14:20 Lewis Howes? How does that look like when you're working with the part of yourself that doesn't feel enough? Are you staring in the mirror? Are you journaling? Are you meditating and having a conversation with yourself? What does that look like?
14:31 Speaker 00 Journaling is the best place to start, in my opinion. And if you don't journal, just start journaling because it will, it will open up your awareness so much. Uh, journaling or meditation is really good. So. Facing these parts of yourself, it starts with admitting that you don't feel good, that there's something wrong. You admit it. You stop resisting it. You go, okay, okay, I feel insecure. Okay, I feel triggered. Okay, I feel anxious. Okay, whatever. And one thing that I say to people when they're in this phase of resistance is to just kind of turn within, whatever it is that's coming up, just say three times, it's okay, it's okay, it's okay. Cause that gets you to accept it and stop fighting it. If you're resisting something, if you're judging something, you will never understand it.
15:13 Speaker 00 You can't be in judgment and understanding at the same time. If you don't understand it, you can't integrate it. So you have to accept it first. Stop judging it. Accept it. It's happening. It doesn't mean it's okay. It means you're actually going to start the process of releasing it. So accept it first of all. Then you wanna just observe it and start to name it. What is this feeling? Where does this live in my body? You know, how does it feel in my body? Start identifying it. And then you wanna tune into what part of me does this correspond to? And that's where, if you're doing it in a meditative state, you can tune into your body and feel into where this is in your body and like pull that part of you out and look at them. You might notice it's a five-year-old version of you. You might notice it's, it's, it looks like a crazy goblin or something, whatever it looks like.
15:56 Speaker 00 Or if you're in a journal, you might start to get certain traits or characteristics or a timeframe of when this version of you was born. You don't even need to know exactly when you're doing shadow work, by the way. You don't need to know, okay, this was the fifth of December nineteen. No, you don't need to know exactly. But you wanna start getting awareness as to what this part of you is and what, what's wrong with them, really? What are they feeling? And then, and this is the key point, as soon as you feel you've connected and you become aware, okay, what this is, what part of you it is, you let that part of you vent.
16:25 Lewis Howes? Uh.
16:26 Speaker 00 You let them speak. You let all the emotions come up.
16:30 Lewis Howes? Get it out.
16:31 Speaker 00 Get it out. So for me, like me getting rid of this, I'm not good enough thing, that was with me for years. I had many moments where I had to sit down and I had to cry and I had to scream and I had to be angry and let all of that stuff out of my system that was connected to that part of me. Cause that is the release. And sometimes when you do this, the things that that part of you are saying are not things that you would consciously ever say. So I had a time where I had really bad imposter syndrome. You have to be okay with that.
16:57 Lewis Howes? Yeah.
16:58 Speaker 00 I had times where I had really bad imposter.
16:59 Lewis Howes? Don't do it around other people. Do it in the pillow or do it by yourself.
17:02 Speaker 00 Make sure you're in a quiet space where you won't be disturbed. Um, but I had this imposter syndrome part of me before, back in my previous business where. I set a boundary and I was really triggered and this was after I started doing shadow work. So I was like, okay, what is this? Why are you triggered? And I went into it and I went into the part of me that felt triggered. And she was saying things like, you're just a stupid girl. Nobody respects you and me. Hold me would never say that. I knew better than to say that, right? I know the power of words.
17:30 Lewis Howes? You were saying this out loud.
17:32 Speaker 00 I was saying it in my journal.
17:33 Lewis Howes? Okay.
17:33 Speaker 00 And I would say it like a meditative state. You can say it out loud as well. I was with my boyfriend at the time and he was in the room. So I was like, right, I'll just do this. But, you know, I just let her. I didn't judge what she was saying. This is kind of the key energy you want to be in. You're in the compassionate observer. And even if it's something you would never say or or express, there's a part of you that needs to express that. You'd be shocked the stuff that would come out.
17:55 Lewis Howes? Wow.
17:55 Speaker 00 So for her, she had to get all of this out, like you're just a stupid girl, dah dah dah. And then I started to realize, oh yeah, this was coming from this time that I was me to feel like a stupid girl at a meeting. And that's why this part of me exists and I get it. Cause once that part of you then is finished venting and releasing and purging. Then you know, then you understand it, then you know how to reassure it because you've listened to it. You've felt it, you've let it process. And even if we think about the emotion that that part of you is holding on to, that's an energy cycle that hasn't completed yet. So when you let yourself feel the emotion, whatever fear inadequacy or pain happened, when you let yourself feel it, the energy cycle can complete. And then it can start to leave your body, basically. So once you've let them vent, then you reassure them.
18:40 Speaker 00 This is like where things start to get really nice and they get lighter and lighter. So you say to them, I'm here for you. I love you. I see you. I'm never going to leave you alone again. I'm sorry I pushed you in the dark. You, I cherish you. You're a part of me. And if you're doing this in a meditation, you might actually start to see that part of you changes. They start to brighten up and they start to feel safe to let go of this old way of thinking. And you can tell them anything they need to hear to feel safe in letting go of this old belief or this old idea. And then you'll notice that their energy has shifted completely. The whole thing will have freed up. You can give that part of you something new to focus on. So you can say.
19:15 Lewis Howes? Like what?
19:16 Speaker 00 Instead of.
19:18 Speaker 00 For example, instead of telling me, you know, I'm just a stupid girl who doesn't know what she's doing. You can back me up and give me like more reasons as to why I do know what I'm doing. You can remind me of all the reasons why I am capable. You can remind me of all the times that I have been capable.
19:34 Lewis Howes? Mm hmm.
19:35 Speaker 00 Cause that part of you is a part of you and they need a role. And so that's the whole, that's the whole process. It doesn't take very long. It doesn't take a whole lot of time or energy. And it is so transformative. It just takes courage and the humility and honesty to just really look at yourself.
19:52 Lewis Howes? Oh, man, such a powerful exercise. I've done this many times and I'm constantly reminded on doing this as well when my, you know, the little version of me comes out or gets triggered or something. And I think it's, it, it, it really comes down to, do you want to be the most empowering coach to yourself or a constant critic to yourself?
20:12 Speaker 00 Yeah.
20:13 Lewis Howes? And like you said, you need to have courage to coach yourself. It's easy to criticize over and over again, like you're an idiot or you're stupid or you don't matter or whatever it is. Um, that's like an easy program that is just playing in most people's heads. It takes courage and consciousness to distance yourself from the part of you that is out of alignment. Where it feels like it is you, but it's just a part of you that's out of alignment from your greatest version of you. And it takes consciousness and courage to, to look at it. And have compassion, like you said, for that part of yourself, even if you've been running in this cycle or script or story for years.
20:56 Lewis Howes? And say, wow, I can't believe I've allowed myself to run this, this way. I've allowed this part of me to essentially be my identity for so long or perceive as my identity for so long. Not having all the shame and the guilt around it, but having compassion for it, having understanding. And then saying, all right, how can I be an empowering coach to myself and have compassion for that part of me? And instead of making it wrong and bad constantly by criticizing it, let me empower it, that part of me, by giving it something else to focus on, something else to channel its energy and to come back into the whole part of me.
21:35 Speaker 00 Yep.
21:36 Lewis Howes? And when I can constantly bring that back inside of me as opposed to trying to shame it, but say, okay, you served a purpose. You were here for a reason to protect us. Now, me as the conscious coach inside of us, I got us. I'm going to lead us to the next, to the next step. And when we can be in that conscious coach more frequently, that's when amazing things start to unfold in our life. But it, it can be challenging if we haven't trained ourselves in how to do that.
22:10 Speaker 00 Yeah.
22:11 Lewis Howes? It can be very challenging because it's, it's hard to step away from that triggering part of you that feels like you're not enough, you're not lovable. Whatever you do doesn't matter, or it always falls apart, whatever it is that you've been running in that story or that script. So it takes insane courage.
22:29 Speaker 00 Yeah.
22:30 Lewis Howes? Probably the hardest courage you'll ever have is facing yourself in that part.
22:34 Speaker 00 Yeah. I think it's kind of a lesson on life and fulfillment and greatness as well. It's like the things that are most difficult to do are often the most simple things, right? It's the stuff that is hard to look at. The inner work that's hard to do when you actually do that stuff, when you just make the commitment to always be with yourself, always look within, always ask, well, why am I responding that way? Well, what is it within me that's creating this? If you commit to doing that and you commit to working hard on yourself and your energy, you won't have to work so hard in reality because the internal is looking after the external.
23:15 Lewis Howes? That's true.
23:19 Lewis Howes? How would you describe what someone's frequency means? And why does having the right frequency in your life determine whether you will manifest what you want? Or what you won't create?
23:31 Speaker 00 Hmm. So your frequency basically is consisting of the sum total of you. Okay? So when I talk about frequency, I'm talking about your overall identity, essentially. So that is the sum total of your beliefs, your beliefs about yourself and the world, your dominant emotional states, and then your thoughts. All of that comprises your energetic frequency. And when we think about it, everything in this universe is energy. Okay, this table is energy, that camera is energy, all of it is energy. But we are energetic beings as well at our core. So we have these physical bodies, we also have energetic bodies, we also have thoughts existing on the mental field, we also have emotions. All of those things have an energetic frequency.
24:15 Speaker 00 So the the primary kind of shareholders of your frequency is your emotions, your thoughts, your beliefs.
24:21 Lewis Howes? Hmm. How does someone then elevate their frequency to a level where they can manifest what they want?
24:26 Speaker 00 Yeah.
24:27 Lewis Howes? So there's a lot of people that feel like they have a desire, they want to create something, but they have a roadblock over and over again, and they feel stuck or trapped. And they feel like, no matter what I do, I'm not creating what I want. So how does someone raise their frequency to start attracting abundance?
24:45 Speaker 00 When people think about manifestation, they don't realize the power that their energy actually has. Um, and they're looking at physical reality and they're they're putting most of their focus actually on what they want to change in their life, right? So let's say what someone wants to manifest abundance. That person more than likely is focusing on the circumstances of lack in their life, because they're so frustrated with the lack that they're constantly thinking about, I don't have enough money. I don't, I don't want to have this unexpected bill, et cetera, et cetera. And so the the biggest hurdle, I think, for people in the trying to shift their energy and shift their frequency, is they're too focused on their circumstances and the reality that they don't prefer.
25:25 Speaker 00 Because when you focus on something, essentially, you are using that basically as feedback to your system. And for example, if you have circumstances of lack and limitation, you might start believing that that's all that's possible for you, right? So you're allowing your circumstances to continue to define your beliefs about yourself, about your money, about the world. Uh, that dictates your thoughts, that dictates your identity. And your emotional state towards money stays the same because you're constantly looking and feeling, oh, I feel lack, I feel limited, right? So the biggest and first step I would say for people, if they want to shift their frequency, is they have to stop taking their circumstances as definitive. That is like the number one biggest thing that I teach that really starts shifting things for people.
26:08 Speaker 00 They've got to start realizing that they are so much bigger than the circumstances. They are so much bigger. And physical reality, when we think about manifestation, like if you're in a circumstance of lack, that is kind of like the final one percent of manifestation. It's not the full process. There's an entire unseen process that goes on before we hit the final one percent of the circumstance of lack. And that unseen process starts within you, in your energetic frequency. So you want to start defining your identity, your beliefs, your attitude, your emotions, your thoughts. About money, for example, if that's what you're trying to shift from within.
26:45 Lewis Howes? How do they start shifting that eternally?
26:48 Speaker 00 There's so many steps, but the first one is to first of all, realize that the past is not, does not have to be the future. It does not define them unless they say it does. Okay? So one of the biggest things, and this is gonna, we're gonna go quite out there for a minute, but one of the biggest things that starts to reframe this for people is when people realize that they are very powerful creative beings. And they realize they're already manifesting constantly. We manifest like we breathe air. We can't help it. We literally, God created man in his image. Okay? So we are inherently creative beings. We have an essence. We have like a fractal of that divine essence of God within us, each and every one of us. And I think a lot of people, the reason they aren't able to change is because they don't believe that they have this power.
27:33 Speaker 00 They don't believe that they have so much power over their circumstances. And so what ends up happening is they end up treating their circumstances as totally definitive, rather than them realizing, oh, hey, I'm the one who's creating this situation. I'm the one who's energetically corresponding with the reality of lack. And so. When people wanna manifest, I think the first thing they have to get into their head is the order of creation in reality.
27:57 Lewis Howes? What is the order of creation when manifesting in the reality for yourself?
28:01 Speaker 00 You can look at this from a few different perspectives, but everything that exists physically in the physical world has come from the non-physical, okay? So everything physically that exists is just particles vibrating at different frequencies, right? Before they exist as particles, they exist as waves of potential in the quantum fields. So there's infinite potentials in this unseen field that is beyond our senses. What we call physical reality is less than one percent of what exists in the entire universe, right? And so us as well as human beings, we exist on the physical plane, but we also exist on the mental plane, the plane of thoughts, which is beyond the physical. And we also exist on the spiritual plane, where infinite possibilities exist because we are one with the Creator.
28:45 Speaker 00 And this, the reason I think this is so important for beginning to shift your frequency, is you've got to open up your mind and realize that you are so much bigger than physical reality. Because we've been gifted mental faculties like imagination, intellect, intuition, reasoning, will, we have the power to direct our creative consciousness at certain possibilities in the quantum fields and then bring those into form. There's an experiment in quantum mechanics, it's called the double slit experiment, which essentially shows that electrons exist as waves of potential, so many possible states in the quantum field, until they are observed by an external observer. And then they start behaving as particles, okay?
29:29 Speaker 00 So what that shows us is our consciousness and what we call the material world is intrinsically linked. And we are influencing everything around us constantly through our focus, through our awareness and through our perspective, right? And so the first thing, you've got to notice, okay, I am playing an integral role here. I am not just this physical body. I always say to people, you did not just fall out of a coconut tree. You are consciousness embodied in physical form. You are consciousness being directed into the mental field, at your neurological tissue that's created minds. You're existing in the mental field and you're also consciousness existing in a physical body. And so. The way you start rising above and shifting your frequency is you start to harness and realize
30:11 Speaker 00 the power of your energy and the power of your thoughts, your perspective, what you focus on and your beliefs. So you wanna start really defining that stuff for yourself from the energy of as soon as I change my beliefs, as soon as I change my perspective, as soon as I change my attitude, as soon as I change my identity, everything around me will start to change because that is the way that it works.
30:32 Lewis Howes? So first, even if we've never experienced success or the feeling of abundance or the feeling of I'm putting in an intentional thought out in the world of wanting to create something and it comes to me.
30:45 Speaker 00 Yeah.
30:46 Lewis Howes? Although we're manifesting all the time, no matter what, we're constantly manifesting what we're creating in our life. But if it feels like what we really desire, we're not able to manifest. First, it's shifting the belief that it's possible. Is that what I'm hearing you say?
30:59 Speaker 00 Yeah.
31:00 Lewis Howes? Because if you never believed it's possible, it's gonna be hard to create it.
31:03 Speaker 00 Exactly.
31:04 Lewis Howes? And is that the order of creation?
31:06 Speaker 00 So the order of creation, if we break it down simply, is be, do, have. I know you had Myron Golden on a little while ago and he spoke about this.
31:13 Lewis Howes? Yeah.
31:13 Speaker 00 So in Genesis, it says, be fruitful, multiply, have dominion. Says it right there in Genesis. So essentially, you have to become, be the version of you who's there already before you can do, take the actions, before you can have the material results. That is the order. It's not have, do, be. It's be, do, have. So even if you've not ever experienced something in your physical reality, manifestation is not about experiencing something physically or getting something in the physical world. When you look at it on a deeper layer, manifestation is about getting something internally so that you can see it reflected externally to you. Because what you're perceiving is just a mirror reflection of your state, of your energy. That is all.
31:57 Lewis Howes? That's it.
31:58 Speaker 00 Yeah.
31:58 Lewis Howes? So you're perceiving in the physical world what you're experiencing in the internal world.
32:03 Speaker 00 Exactly.
32:03 Lewis Howes? How does someone know what frequency they're actually operating at right now in life?
32:08 Speaker 00 By looking at their life, by looking at their results. So you can very quickly tell what your beliefs are, what your identity, self-concept is, by looking at the results that you have in your life. You look at your finances, your relationships, your career, what you feel you're worthy of, all of these things. That can tell you really quickly where you're operating at.
32:27 Lewis Howes? So look at your life, look at your relationship, look at your bank account, look at everything around, look at your health, look at your body and say, okay, is my life have the results that I desire? Or am I kind of mirroring the thoughts, beliefs and emotions inside of me physically around me?
32:47 Speaker 00 Yeah.
32:47 Lewis Howes? Okay, so first do an assessment, your frequency, your energetic frequency, it sounds like, and assess where you're at in your life.
32:53 Speaker 00 Yeah.
32:54 Lewis Howes? And, you know, at one point in my life, I was sleeping on my sister's couch for a year and a half. I had no money, I was broke, living off three credit cards. And it probably was a reflection of kind of where I was at in my life internally. And once I started to shift the belief around myself of what I'm capable of, I started to see external results as well, is what I'm hearing you say is, first, take a look at your life and see where that is. Then look at the order of creation, which is instead of wanting to have something and feeling a certain way, once you have it, feel that way first, be that way first. Be the love you want to be, be positivity, be joy.
33:33 Speaker 00 Yeah.
33:33 Lewis Howes? Be fun, be playful. And you'll start to create more of that around you as well.
33:39 Speaker 00 Absolutely. And it's not easy to do.
33:41 Lewis Howes? Why is it hard for people to be before they have?
33:45 Speaker 00 Because we're conditioned to focus on the external, to define our value, our identity from what we see around us. We've forgotten that we are inherently creative beings. And we're not taught how to use the power of our minds, our imagination, belief, intention, none of that. We don't even know about our intuition, we don't know about any of that. All we know is what we see. So we base everything off what we see with our eyes, not realizing that that's just a tiny fractal of what exists and not realizing that we are so much bigger than what we see. And so it's, it's a kind of a conditioning thing. It's, it's a lack of awareness, really. We don't have the awareness to realize that we can be so much more than what we've been experiencing.
34:25 Lewis Howes? What's the one thing that you see people do that keeps them stuck? Even when they're consuming all the right content, going to the right courses and events that are teaching them something about creating what they want? They have the coach, they're investing in the books, they're watching your content, but they're still stuck. What is blocking them from creating that breakthrough?
34:45 Speaker 00 Fundamentally, people get stuck when.
34:50 Speaker 00 They know they don't wanna be who they've been, but they're not ready to be who they're supposed to be yet. Right. So if you almost think of it like every, every outcome that you desire in physical reality, there is a version of you that corresponds with that version of reality. And your ticket to getting to that version of reality, that level in this game of life is becoming that version of you now. That's the only way in. That is the only way. There's no other way in. You have to become that version of you first, then you can start living within that level in that game of life, right? And so a lot of people get stuck because they're learning, they're, they're getting all the information, they're learning all the stuff, but they're not embodying it. They're not actually living it. Okay. So they could know, okay, I need to set these boundaries. I need to have new standards. I need to cut all of this stuff out. I need to cut these people out.
35:34 Speaker 00 I need to show up more, you know, courageously, or I need to show up more authentically, or whatever it is. But they just can't do it. And so then a person will enter what I call the in-between phase, which is a really painful phase. If you've ever been in the in-between phase, it's not nice. That's where you're stuck because you're not who you were and you're not that new version of you yet. So you're just kind of floating in the middle. And the only way that you can get unstuck is to figure out, why are you resisting becoming that version of you? Like, what is it within you that fears that or thinks you're not worthy of that? Cause nothing you do is random. Every behavior that you have is driven by a belief or a part of you or a past trauma or something like that.
36:16 Speaker 00 And so oftentimes we're blocked from stepping into that next level version of us and therefore that next level of reality. Because there's parts of us that are just resisting that, that are not ready to go for it.
36:27 Lewis Howes? Well, it's almost like you have to kill off the person you once were in order to become the version of you that can attract everything you want. It's maybe not kill off, maybe it's a bad thing, but it's like something needs to, you need to let go of something. Whether it's like killing off or letting something die that was once inside of you to start living in a certain way that attracts the things you want.
36:49 Speaker 00 Yeah.
36:50 Lewis Howes? And it's stepping into the alignment of what you want and the way of being that's necessary, that's required to attract what you want in the physical world. Right?
37:01 Speaker 00 Yeah, so when we see people growing a lot and they have a lot of success in the world and they keep reaching new levels. You can look at that person and just know what they're doing is they're changing into different versions of themselves constantly. That is a person who's constantly evolving, which means constantly letting go of parts of the old self. That's the journey.
37:19 Lewis Howes? You can't bring that with you.
37:20 Speaker 00 You can't bring that with you, no. So I always say for every next level that you go to, you're gonna have to sacrifice a part, if not multiple parts of you. Because, let's zoom it out for a second, okay. We're all, we all came into these physical bodies, our souls descended into these physical bodies, we opened our eyes, we started to get conditioned and programmed by the world around us. We started to have different experiences, different traumas, different things happen, and we start building this identity, okay. And oftentimes, the identity that we are embodied within for most of our lives is not the vehicle, it's not the identity that corresponds with our dream life, okay. So we end up with these characteristics and traits that are not aligned with who we really are. They're not aligned with our true path and our true purpose.
38:04 Speaker 00 And then we wanna get in alignment with our true path and our true purpose, and we're like, this is gonna be great, we don't realize we have to kill off a whole lot of this old identity in order to actually resonate energetically with this purpose, with this, with this dream life.
38:16 Lewis Howes? And where does the ego play into all this?
38:18 Speaker 00 The ego, oh my goodness, the ego gets a lot of, um, the ego has a lot of negative connotations. To me, the ego is not, is not negative. You almost wanna think of it like this, right? The ego is just like the character that you're playing, right? It's your consciousness at your essence. You're not just this physical body, you're not just your mind, you know that because you can observe your mind, your thoughts, you can observe your body. So you're actually the observer, which is the pure consciousness within you, okay? And the ego essentially is the character that your consciousness is playing in this physical world. So it's like light filtering in through a stained glass window. I think I heard someone say that before, but that's such a good analogy. You're the light, but you're also the projection through the stained glass window, which is the ego, the character.
39:03 Speaker 00 And even if you wanna think of it like a video game. You're the character in this video game, but you're also the player of the character. So the ego is kind of like your vehicle throughout this reality. It's not negative. It can be very limiting, though.
39:16 Lewis Howes? Hmm.
39:17 Speaker 00 Because if you're playing in an ego character that's not aligned with the life that you desire, then that is going to be standing in the way of you resonating with it vibrationally.
39:25 Lewis Howes? So how does someone harness the power of their ego to be in alignment for good rather than something that's hurting them?
39:33 Speaker 00 Personally, I believe the most powerful first step for being able to manage your ego. You want to think of it like a wild like horse because it it will control you if you're unconscious of it. You need space from it. You need space. That is the ultimate step one. When you don't have space from your ego, you think you are just the way that you are. You don't realize that you have the power to change your characteristics. And even if you look at, you know, when you wake up in the morning and you open your eyes and your consciousness flows into your brain, you automatically start firing and wiring the same thoughts that you did the day before. Automatically, it happens on autopilot. You have like these well trodden neural pathways in your head that are just, they've been used for so long that the brain will just use them
40:16 Speaker 00 because it conserves the most energy to use them. It's the easiest route. So you'll think the same things about yourself, about your life, about everything. And it's very difficult to step into a new version of you, a new way of thinking about things, while you're still entrenched in the old one. It's like, it's like trying to jump across the Grand Canyon. It's like, it's really difficult. But if you can take your conscious awareness away from your old thought patterns and away from this old version of you, and you can enter a stillness, present moment awareness, you can realize, I'm not just these thoughts, I'm not just this version of me. And then from there, you have the power to direct your awareness down a new pathway,
41:00 Speaker 00 one that corresponds with a new version of you, a new way of looking at the world.
41:07 Lewis Howes? We have this thing called limiting beliefs a lot. You know, people say that you have a limiting belief and that's one of the things that's holding you back. What would you say is the opposite of a limiting belief? And how can someone start to embrace that opposite?
41:20 Speaker 00 I love this question. I love this question. Okay, so the opposite of a limiting belief is an empowering belief.
41:26 Lewis Howes? Most people never have empowering beliefs because they doubt themselves and put themselves down constantly. So how do we step into empowering beliefs?
41:35 Speaker 00 First of all, you need to realize that you have limiting beliefs. And how you start to identify your limiting beliefs, like we said earlier, is you you look at your life and your results. And you look at, well, what do I need to believe about money for this to be the case in my reality? For me to be running out of money every month? Or what do I need to believe about myself and what I'm worthy of for me to not be able to attract more money in my life? So you almost do like a case study of yourself. And again, it helps a lot if you're in that like observer energy, that neutral state. And you look at, okay.
42:07 Speaker 00 The results that I'm having in my life, they are in direct reflection to my subconscious beliefs. So if I want different results, I need to figure out what am I believing here? That's creating this experience for me, you start to identify it. The other way you can identify your limiting beliefs is to notice when you are speaking something over you that makes you feel limited. Notice when you say something that like shrinks you or makes you feel small or makes you feel like you can't do something.
42:30 Lewis Howes? Like what, like I can't or that's not possible?
42:33 Speaker 00 That's not me, I could never do that, must be nice, that kind of stuff. Like if you see someone else succeeding, you're like, oh yeah, they could have it, but I could never. Those are all pointing to limiting beliefs. And so that's step one is to, you have to identify first when you have limiting beliefs. Once you have realized, oh, wow, okay, I have a limiting belief. You want to kind of figure out. What the narrative is and where it's coming from. Oftentimes, we have limiting beliefs that get into our subconscious mind at a very young age. Because when we're young, our subconscious mind is like a sponge. When we're children, especially below the age of three or two years old. We just take in all the information from our parents.
43:15 Speaker 00 We don't have like that conscious part of the brain that can like divide out what we want to take in or not. It's just automatic. It's kind of a survival thing. Actually, we need to, in order to survive, we need to just learn quickly and absorb information. But if you grew up in a household where your parents were constantly stressed about money and they were saying money doesn't grow on trees, that kind of stuff. That gets right in there to your subconscious mind. And once a belief is in your subconscious mind, it gets to work automatically, creating your perception of reality. Because if you think about it, okay, what is a belief? A belief is a thought backed by emotional conviction typically. Like if all the thoughts you were to think were to get into your subconscious mind, that would be crazy. Because you could think about a giraffe and then all of a sudden you'd just be perceiving all the giraffes in your environment. It would just be mad.
43:57 Speaker 00 So the only things that really get into your subconscious are the beliefs that are backed by a lot of emotional intensity or repetition, which cause an emotional intensity over time. That's what creates your subconscious beliefs, other than the beliefs that are formed in childhood when you're really young. And so when we think about a human being who has a certain set of beliefs, that's essentially the information that you have perceived throughout your life, that your body has registered as important because you had an emotional reaction to it. And your subconscious stores that basically as a program to make sure you focus on that stuff. Because you've signaled that this stuff is important because you're emotionally tied up in it. And so you will perceive in reality that which is in the box of your subconscious beliefs and nothing outside of that.
44:41 Speaker 00 That'll be your experience and it will also dictate what your body does. It will dictate the actions you take automatically. And people have a hard time like believing this, oh, if I change my belief, things won't just change. But your body is automatically already taking actions based on your subconscious beliefs. Like if you have a belief that I'm, I'm not good with money, you're automatically not going to be good with money. But if you switch that belief to I am good with money, your body will automatically start being good with money. Because your, your subconscious mind controls your body.
45:10 Speaker 00 Yeah.
45:11 Lewis Howes? Yeah. What for you then was the biggest limiting belief that you had to break through? And the moment you broke through it, you started creating a whole new world for yourself.
45:21 Speaker 00 For me, it's been constant, honestly. I I'm constantly changing beliefs. I think one of the biggest ones, and this seemed like a subtle one at first, was believing that I couldn't make YouTube content because I didn't have a prior qualification.
45:37 Lewis Howes? Mm hmm.
45:38 Speaker 00 That stopped me for years.
45:40 Lewis Howes? Really?
45:41 Speaker 00 Years.
45:42 Lewis Howes? How many years?
45:43 Speaker 00 Oh, I would have been on YouTube probably at the age of fifteen if I did my belief.
45:46 Lewis Howes? Oh, wow.
45:47 Speaker 00 Yeah.
45:47 Lewis Howes? Okay.
45:48 Speaker 00 And I remember I was I was getting to the point, I was getting so fed up with not starting on YouTube. And I was like, right, what is it? Why can't I start? What do I believe about myself?
45:56 Lewis Howes? What was it?
45:57 Speaker 00 It was this belief that you you can't get on YouTube because you don't have a qualification.
46:01 Lewis Howes? For what? Qualification for what?
46:02 Speaker 00 I don't know. This is beliefs that don't make sense. Sometimes they don't make sense.
46:06 Lewis Howes? Yeah.
46:06 Speaker 00 But I thought, you know, I need to have a super successful business or I need to have some kind of accolade for people to take me seriously or to feel like my voice matters or anything like that. And so I sat down with that. This is one of the clearest ones I can remember. And by the way, if you're rewiring a belief, you just get your journal out and just write down, okay, where is this coming from? What is this narrative? What is this based on? I was looking, I didn't realize, but I was looking at stuff in my reality that backed up this belief. I was only really watching people who had achieved a lot of success before before. So I was thinking, right, I'm not them, so I can't do this. I can't make content. And then I looked a little bit deeper and I was like, okay, what do I want to believe instead? So to answer your question about how to rewire a belief, we're going to go back to that now through this example.
46:49 Speaker 00 Essentially, you reprogram a belief, you identify it, you figure out where it came from. And then, because when you figure out where it came from, essentially, you start to reduce sometimes the emotional weight that it has. When you figure out that you have a belief from something ages ago, that maybe it wasn't even yours, maybe it was your parents. A lot of the emotional intensity you felt before in that belief, it starts to drop off because you realize, oh, wow, that's actually not really true. Or that doesn't have to be true for me anymore. So rewiring a belief, you essentially. You've got one belief that's already in your mind, right? That's the one that you've got. Say that's your limiting belief. To get rid of this one, you need a new, more empowering belief that totally contradicts the old one. So if you have a belief, I'm broke, you need to have a belief like I'm abundant because that's an opposite belief.
47:32 Speaker 00 And if you can believe in that more, i.e. buy into your emotions more than the old one, it will displace it. I've called this the law of displacement. I don't know if I made that up. I feel like I have. But essentially, you rewire a belief by displacing it.
47:44 Lewis Howes? So break it down. So give me an example of like a belief around something and how to displace it.
47:49 Speaker 00 Okay, so let's take the example of someone who thinks they're bad with money, right? They're going throughout their life, they're very bad at money. They realize, oh, hey, I have a belief that I'm bad with money. They want to look at, right? Where did that come from? Maybe it came from times where they saw their parents be really bad at money. And we just are not good with that kind of stuff. We're not like that, right? So they have this narrative instilled into them that they're bad at money. They're just not the kind of person who's financially.
48:14 Lewis Howes? It's hard to make money. It's hard to manage money, whatever it might be, yeah.
48:17 Speaker 00 So from a young age, they might have this belief instilled into them that they are bad with money. And what they can do practically is just see where that comes from and then go, okay, what do I want to believe instead? This is like the pivotal point when it starts to shift. What do I want to believe instead?
48:31 Lewis Howes? So I have a certain belief that I'm bad with money.
48:34 Speaker 00 Yeah.
48:34 Lewis Howes? Now, what do I want to believe instead? I want to believe this.
48:38 Speaker 00 Yeah, you have to figure out what an opposite belief is in that same, in that same category that could replace it, right? So an opposite belief is I'm good with money. Now, what a lot of people make a mistake with when they're trying to rewire a belief is they're trying to pick a belief that feels a million miles away. So someone who has the belief I'm bad with money, they might want to bring in a belief I'm amazing with money. I'm like Warren Buffett, but that's not going to work. Because you can't buy into that with your emotions. So it's not going to rewire.
49:05 Lewis Howes? It's not believable.
49:06 Speaker 00 It's not believable.
49:07 Lewis Howes? Right. Your body doesn't believe it. You're lying to your immune system. Everything is like, ha, but that doesn't feel right. I'm just lying.
49:14 Speaker 00 Yeah.
49:14 Lewis Howes? So how do you create a new belief that you've never experienced without lying to yourself?
49:20 Speaker 00 These are questions I've asked myself so much. Luckily for you, I have an answer. You pick a belief you can believe in, even just like a little bit believe in. Pick the lowest hanging fruit belief that's more empowering than your old one. I don't know if you've heard of the law of polarity, but essentially you're moving up the spectrum from the negative end of a particular belief or a particular energy into the positive end. It doesn't mean you have to go from I'm broke to I'm super wealthy. It could be I'm broke to I'm improving every day in my finances, right? It could be I'm bad at money to I'm getting better and better with money. I'm not as bad as I used to be at money. So you're trending along the spectrum into the more positive range.
50:00 Speaker 00 But the key thing is the moment you buy into the belief that you are getting better with money, that replaces the belief of I'm bad at money. Cause the two can't exist at the same time, because they're opposing each other.
50:11 Lewis Howes? Yes.
50:12 Speaker 00 Okay, so you pick something you can believe in. And then you buy into that with your emotions. How do you buy into that with your emotions? There's a few ways. The first thing you can do is close your eyes, calm yourself down, slow down your brainwaves, relax your body completely. Let your consciousness come out of your thinking mind and into your subconscious mind where it can connect to a new possibility to your imagination. And then you just visualize what it feels like for you to live in this new belief as your new reality. And you get your emotions involved. So you picture in your mind, using your imaginative powers, what reality feels like, how you feel in this new belief of I'm, I'm getting better and better at money.
50:54 Speaker 00 You might play out a scene where you're doing up a budget, or you're deciding not to splurge on something, or you're deciding to invest in something. And you, key point, you feel how that feels in your body. What you're doing in that moment is you're bringing in the, the new thought of I'm getting better at money. You're bringing in the emotion that's associated with that thought. And the more you can feel that emotion, the more it wires in the new belief. Because a belief is just a thought backed by emotion, right?
51:23 Lewis Howes? Mm hmm.
51:24 Speaker 00 So you have the frequency of the thought, the frequency of the emotion, when they come together, they get wired in. And when it reaches the threshold that you're feeling that more than you felt the old one, then it replaces the old one and enters your subconscious mind.
51:39 Lewis Howes? A belief is a thought backed by emotion. Right. What is the emotion
51:46 Lewis Howes? that has been on repeat for you lately that is not serving you, that you're working on overcoming?
51:53 Speaker 00 Impatience.
51:54 Lewis Howes? Impatience.
51:54 Speaker 00 Impatience. Yeah.
51:56 Lewis Howes? You want everything done yesterday?
51:57 Speaker 00 Yeah. Um, I, yeah, I'm having to catch myself because I'm pedaling into the future because I get excited about all the things that I'm doing and then I forget to be here now, which is so important because your power is here and now. All the opportunities you could ever need are right in front of you, right here and now, they're not in the future. Um, so yeah, for me, impatience, present moment awareness is something that I'm having to come back to.
52:23 Lewis Howes? Okay. So how do you, if someone is impatient, how do they learn how to be present with this practice?
52:32 Speaker 00 I think for me, when, when, when I'm personally trying to learn something, and this is what I feel like helps a lot of people. You kind of have to understand what you have to lose from operating the way that you're operating, right? So for me, working on impatience, I have to look at, okay, what is it costing me being impatient? It's costing me the present moment. It's costing me my power right now in this present moment. It's costing me my happiness and fulfillment right now in the present moment. And it's also blocking me from surrendering and allowing things to unfold actually as they need to.
53:09 Lewis Howes? Hmm.
53:10 Speaker 00 There's a really great verse I love. It's with man, this is impossible. With God, all things are possible. And essentially, the meaning that I interpret from that is when we're forcing all the time in our logic and we're trying to figure everything out, we're trying to think 20 steps ahead. We typically get in the way of the divine path unfolding in the best possible way. Because whatever future outcome that you want.
53:39 Speaker 00 It's gonna be a different version of you at that outcome, as we spoke about. And what's logical to that version of you is very difficult, different to what's logical to this version of you. So you're trying to figure everything out from this old version of you. You're not even the version that's gonna be at this new reality. So you're typically not gonna know the ways how. Like, you don't have all the information yet of how this thing is gonna unfold. So a lot of people, they stress themselves out getting impatient, getting frustrated, thinking ten steps ahead. When the only step you can really have control over and you can really figure out is the one that's right in front of you.
54:13 Lewis Howes? Mm hmm.
54:13 Speaker 00 And I always say to people, the path illuminates as you walk it. You're gonna know what next step to take. And when you step on that step, then you're gonna know the second step to take. And when you step on the second one, then you're gonna know the third one. But you're not gonna know all twenty steps when you're on the first step. Why? Because every step that you take, that who you are, who you're embodied in, changes a little bit. Your energy changes a little bit, your perspective changes a little bit. And then when your perspective changes, the steps that you can perceive to take change, right? So who you are on step zero is not the same as who you are on step five. And that is why you need to be patient, because you have to go all in on the step that's in front of you.
54:54 Speaker 00 So that you can keep stepping forward as this new version of you. Your energy keeps shifting, your perspective keeps shifting. And then the path just unfolds as you walk it.
55:02 Lewis Howes? It's so hard for people that wanna know exactly what to do in the future. They wanna strategize everything. I mean, I, I'm guilty of that as well. It's like, okay, I wanna know exactly. I have a goal. I wanna know all the steps it's gonna take to get there, at least a semi-detailed plan. But a lot of time, the change, the, the plan's gonna change.
55:19 Speaker 00 Yeah.
55:20 Lewis Howes? You know, so it's, so if someone has a goal in mind, you know, they're listening to this, they're watching this, and they say, okay, I want to create this specific outcome in my life. My health, my relationship, a new career, business, a certain amount of money. And here's my detailed ten-step plan. What should people be thinking differently around accomplishing a goal? Instead of trying to have everything figured out from now until that goal happens.
55:50 Speaker 00 It depends on how different the goal is to where they are right now. If you're going to a reality and experience a reality that's very different from where you have been, it's gonna be a very different version of you that's able to correspond energetically with that. And again, that version of you has a whole different perspective. What's logical for them, the ideas that they have, the actions that they take is very different from this version of you. That's why they can have those results and this version of you can't. So what I say to people, when they're trying to manifest a big change in their life, you write down the vision, you get it as clear as possible from what you know now.
56:32 Speaker 00 But you write that down so that you can then extract from the vision, who is the version of you who's there already? Because that is the vehicle to get there. That is the path. Don't worry about the path that your old mindset is making up. Your old mindset has gotten you the results that you have right now. It's not going to get you to the new reality because essentially your logic has just been programmed by what you've experienced up until this moment. It can't tell you how to get somewhere it's never experienced before. Okay, so and that old version of you, that old way of thinking, it's not coming with you to this new reality. So you don't need to listen to it. Okay. So a lot of people, they shoot themselves in the foot because they start trying to think, oh my God, I have this big dream, I have this big vision. But it doesn't make sense. They're trying to make it compute with what they've experienced in the past.
57:16 Speaker 00 When it's a totally different vibration, it's a totally different reality. And it's not gonna make sense to the old version of them. And it's okay that it doesn't because that version of them is not coming with them. So tangibly, what can someone hold on to then? They hold on to becoming the new version of them. They go all in on becoming the version of them who's there already. And when they do that, their identity begins to shift, their beliefs begin to shift, their thoughts begin to shift. And then what they think is logical, the ideas that they perceive to take, the actions they perceive to take, that all changes automatically.
57:51 Lewis Howes? If someone's in a breakdown right now, how do they even know there's a good version of them inside of themselves? When all they feel, the shame, guilt, embarrassment, loss, like they're not enough. And no matter what they do, they're never gonna be enough.
58:07 Speaker 00 I think it starts with just educating yourself on why you feel the way that you feel.
58:14 Speaker 00 None of us were born ashamed. None of us were born traumatized. We're not feeling good enough. Okay, so we're all inherently whole. We're all inherently good enough. We're all inherently abundant. We're all inherently very connected. At our essence, we are, that can't be touched, that cannot be touched. But as we go throughout life, we go through different experiences that program us into believing that we're not good enough. We might have different like trauma experiences. And when I say trauma experience, I don't mean, it doesn't even have to be a big trauma, right? A lot of people do have big trauma. But a trauma is just something that was distressing. It's a distressing experience that was not resolved in the moment.
58:58 Speaker 00 So a trauma for a person could literally just be as a baby, not getting enough eye contact. That could be a trauma. And as a baby, you need a certain amount of eye contact. Otherwise, you start to feel like you're not seen, like you're not important, like you're not valid, like you're not safe. That's a trauma. So a person as a baby who just didn't get enough eye contact from their mother, they might have an integral belief that I'm not worthy, I'm not enough, just from that. Okay, so I think it starts with understanding that we're, we all have trauma. We all have trauma. Except maybe like the enlightened masters that have walked this earth. I think they're pretty clear. But all of us as human beings, we have inherited a lot of trauma. And it's not to point the finger at your parents or your family and say, oh, this is their fault. No, because they had trauma.
59:42 Speaker 00 So this world is operating in a certain state of consciousness that makes it quite difficult to meet all the needs of children and of people around us. We're quite separated from each other and we're quite disconnected from the heart and from connection and from meeting our needs together as a collective. And so naturally, we inherit these traumas because of that when we're very young. And those are the things typically that cause us to hold on to shame, self doubt, feelings of not good enough. I read recently that eighty percent of millennials don't feel good enough or more.
1:00:18 Speaker 00 That is a problem, right? Because every like, and when you start to dig into the reasons why someone doesn't feel good enough, this is the crazy thing. You start to realize there's, there's really no basis for it. Right? So it starts with understanding that this, you're not alone if you feel this, first of all, you're definitely not alone, that you're in the majority. And the reason so many people feel that way is because of the experiences they've had throughout their life that have not been resolved yet.
1:00:48 Lewis Howes? So it comes down to healing and, and, and creating a, a space for yourself to heal the different big or little traumas in your life that have been unresolved. And resolving those and creating new meaning around those experiences or new relief around those experiences where they don't define your beliefs anymore.
1:01:07 Speaker 00 Yeah.
1:01:08 Lewis Howes? And when the past is defining who you are and your beliefs around what is possible for your life, then you're always going to feel stuck at some level, or you're always going to be repeating a pattern in a new environment, just replicating an old belief until you shift and start to heal the past so you can create space for new beliefs. You know, you hear this, you hear this thing about people saying like, take your power back. Like you gotta take your power back. Does taking your power back meaning starting a healing process, creating boundaries, doing shadow work? Like what is taking your power back actually mean? And where does your power live?
1:01:47 Speaker 00 I love this question. I only answered this question in my journal two weeks ago, so you're like connected to me, we're constantly entangled. Okay. So a lot of people think that taking your power back is about saying affirmations and repeating to yourself, I am confident, I am powerful. Yes, that stuff can, can help you, it can help direct your focus. But really, your power is found in facing all the parts of you that believe you don't have power.
1:02:14 Lewis Howes? Really?
1:02:15 Speaker 00 That's where your power is. Because that's the stuff that's keeping your power locked up and hidden away from you. Okay? So the ashamed parts, the parts that fear that you'll never be enough. Facing those, meeting those, integrating those is the path back to your power. Because inherently you're powerful. You are inherently very, very powerful. Bob Proctor used to say, you have enough uh power in your body to fuel an entire modern city for a week. Right? We're very powerful beings. We were born powerful. But we've forgotten it because of the experiences that we've gone through throughout our life that cause us to believe that we don't have power.
1:02:54 Lewis Howes? On a scale of one to ten, ten being ultimate power for yourself. Not in terms of like ruling the world or something, but you feeling ultimate power within yourself. One feeling like you have no power. Where are you currently on that scale?
1:03:10 Speaker 00 I'd say I'm about an eight.
1:03:11 Lewis Howes? Okay.
1:03:12 Speaker 00 Yeah.
1:03:13 Lewis Howes? Where were you a few years ago?
1:03:14 Speaker 00 Oh.
1:03:16 Speaker 00 Um, a few years ago. Well, about three years ago, I was living in my mother's house in the spare room. So I was about a two, I would say. Yeah. I was about a two. And the journey from a two to an eight. And it's ongoing, it's constantly ongoing. Uh, was really just getting honest with myself about why I was where I was and beginning to get curious about why I felt so bad about myself, why I felt so disconnected from myself and how I could start to make my way back. And, you know, you asked a question earlier, when someone's at rock bottom or in that rut. How do they start to move out of it?
1:04:01 Speaker 00 Someone gets in a rut when they have been forcing, living their life out of alignment for too long and running from themselves and forcing for too long. And so the only real way to get out of it and never get in it again is to start to actually meet yourself. When you're in that rock bottom, when you're really disconnected from your power, you need to come back into your body.
1:04:21 Lewis Howes? Hmm.
1:04:22 Speaker 00 You need to call your energy back, call your power back from all these things outside you. All the distractions, all the noise, all the social media, all the things that you're tying your value to, all of that. You need to come back into your body, regulate your nervous system, connect with yourself, begin to talk to yourself, begin to get to know yourself. That is how the journey begins. The most important relationship that you will ever have for your whole life is your relationship to yourself. It's the only person you're going to be with till the day that you die and then after with your soul is eternal, right? And so, you know, the things that you're thinking about yourself, the way that you speak to yourself, that connection you have to yourself, it's the foundation for everything else in your life. So if someone is in that, in that phase, like where I was a couple of years ago,
1:05:06 Speaker 00 where I was so lost, so disconnected at that rock bottom, the way back to your power is by realizing you have the answers inside you and you need to come back to yourself to find them.
1:05:16 Lewis Howes? Yeah, but a lot of people don't feel like they have the, the wisdom inside of them, right? They don't feel that way. What do you think is the biggest thing blocking you from your next level? And whatever that looks like, doesn't mean it has to be creating more money or more followers or more results externally, but whatever that next level is for you.
1:05:32 Speaker 00 Mine is quite niche. Um, my answer honestly, even though it's quite niche. For me, I'm, I'm in a bit of a dance at the moment with balancing my masculine and feminine energy. I've been in my masculine for a really long time and I naturally have a, a good balance of both, that like left and right hemisphere. But I think my next level is going to require me to be more in my feminine.
1:05:56 Lewis Howes? What does that mean?
1:05:57 Speaker 00 So what we're talking about earlier, the impatience, more in that surrender, that flow, that present moment, more in my creative element. And that's going to require me to trust a lot more.
1:06:07 Lewis Howes? Why is it hard for you or some women to trust and step into their feminine nature?
1:06:14 Speaker 00 Well, because we live in a masculine world. Masculine energy runs supreme in this, in this world at the moment. Feminine energies are not prioritized so much. So we're in the realm of intellect, of logic, of reason, of will. Those are all masculine energies. So women, when we are born into this reality, and, and men and women have both masculine and feminine energies, right? So the ideal man is like fifty one percent masculine, forty nine percent feminine and vice versa for a woman. We each have these polarities within us. That's our creative power, right? We, we need both of them. They balance each other out. And in fact, your inner masculine can't be at its most powerful if your inner feminine is not her most powerful. Because your feminine energy.
1:06:55 Speaker 00 Is like the gas. It's the one that visualizes, imagines, creates, plays. It's that presence, that regulation. And then your masculine energy is the action taker. It's the car. Okay. So it's the one that's going to actually drive, make the plans, take the actions, execute, figure out the logical how it's going to happen. You need both of them. It's the one that initiates while you're masculine. So you need both. And what we see in in the world today is most people are totally burnt out in their masculine. They're totally disconnected from their feminine because we're trained to just kind of hustle and hustle and hustle and sacrifice ourselves and our authenticity and everything. Just to make money or get success, when actually.
1:07:35 Speaker 00 If you were to come back and balance out these energies and connect to a meaningful vision for yourself and for your life. You would be far more successful. You would be successful on your own terms. Because you'd be feeding from your feminine energy, a vision that feels aligned and lights you up. That's a lot of gas for your masculine. And so naturally, your masculine will want to take big actions and stuff to bring that vision to life because it's actually meaningful. That's masculine and feminine energy in harmony. But to answer your question, why women feel like it's difficult to connect with their feminine. Is because masculine energy is is the dominant energy in the world and a woman. Typically, she's more connected to her feminine than a man.
1:08:15 Speaker 00 But if she's in a stressful situation, if she's in survival mode, the default is to go to the masculine.
1:08:21 Lewis Howes? Control.
1:08:22 Speaker 00 Yeah.
1:08:22 Lewis Howes? Or a sense of control.
1:08:23 Speaker 00 Yeah. So the mask, the the burnt out survival mode masculine looks like controlling things you can't control. Overworking, procrastinating, all of that is is like the kind of wounded masculine energy that we see.
1:08:35 Lewis Howes? So you feel like you've been more in the masculine energy.
1:08:38 Speaker 00 Yeah.
1:08:38 Lewis Howes? In the last few years.
1:08:40 Speaker 00 Well, for me, it's kind of gone up and down. I was in my masculine energy for my whole life up until I had a little bit of a spiritual awakening. And then I was like, I don't need my masculine energy. I'm just going to live, laugh, love and flow throughout life and everything's just going to come to me. Which that doesn't work either, because yes, you can manifest certain things without taking too much action. But if you want to manifest your dream life where you're living in your purpose and your power, you need to take action. You need to have initiative. So. For me, I've found that I need to, basically, every time my feminine grows, my masculine needs to go. And every time my masculine grows, my feminine needs to go again. And so now I'm in a season of strengthening that inner feminine again, nurturing a new vision again,
1:09:23 Speaker 00 uh, dreaming bigger again, because I've kind of grown a lot within this level. But now it's time for me to kind of evolve into the next level, which means greater levels of trust, connection to myself, and then greater levels of action.
1:09:35 Lewis Howes? What do those ways of being look like then, for you, stepping into your feminine energy more frequently? What is that? Is that playing more, trusting people to do certain jobs for you instead of you doing everything? Like, what does that energy look like?
1:09:50 Speaker 00 So feminine energy is the energy of, yeah, it's receiving, so allowing yourself to receive support or anything like that. It's also just the energy of being, it's the energy of presence. And so for me personally, what it's going to look like going forward is operating even more from my heart, from my intuition, than my intellect and my logic, because I'm grateful I have a strong intellect that allows me to break things down and break concepts down, but, you know, there's different types of intelligence. There's mind intelligence and then there's heart intelligence. So I'm tapping more into the heart intelligence, where I'm leading more with, you know, connecting more to people, feeling more into what people need, and just moving more from a place of intuition, rather than trying to make everything make sense all the time.
1:10:34 Lewis Howes? Yeah, yeah. From your heart.
1:10:35 Speaker 00 Yeah.
1:10:36 Lewis Howes? More from your heart.
1:10:36 Speaker 00 That is feminine, that's feminine energy.
1:10:38 Lewis Howes? Yeah, if you could go into the future 10 years from now, to the, the version of yourself who is living a bigger dream in reality.
1:10:47 Speaker 00 Yeah.
1:10:48 Lewis Howes? In present time, 10 years in the future, what would she say to you right now that you really need to hear?
1:10:53 Speaker 00 She would tell me to have more fun in the process and enjoy the process more. It's interesting you ask that question, because before this interview today, I connected with that version of me, my like higher self in the future, and I said, do you have any, like, in a meditative state, I imagined her in front of me, and I said, what would you say to me? And she was like, just have fun today. And every day from now on, when you're doing something that's in alignment, enjoy it, rather than thinking into the future. Um, so for me personally, I think that's what my future self would say to me.
1:11:24 Lewis Howes? What's something you've been saying lately that has resonated with a lot of people? Just the more frequently you say it, it's just like everyone resonates with it.
1:11:35 Speaker 00 That you are not.
1:11:38 Speaker 00 This persona that's been created from your past and from your conditioning. You are so much bigger than that. There is so much power within each and every human being. And it's not going to be found from looking outside you, looking at other people, chasing all the things that don't matter to you. It's going to be always found by coming back to yourself, facing the things within you that are causing you to be disconnected from that power. And the good news is you can do that. You have all the tools that you need to do that. You can heal anything that's happened to you. You just have to have the courage to do it.
1:12:17 Speaker 00 And that is where you will tap into like tremendous reservoirs of potential, of talent, of insight. It's all there within you, within each and every person waiting to be unlocked.
1:12:33 Lewis Howes? Yeah, that's powerful. You've got a lot of great content over on YouTube, Katie Clark 2100 or on YouTube or on Instagram as well, Katie Clark Official. If people want to get more content, a lot of great. You do these great kind of whiteboard explanations, breaking things down. So I don't know if that's more in your masculine or feminine, nobody do that, but you're analytically breaking things down, which is great because people learn based on how you're you're creating it. So I think it's really cool, but maybe that's just something to look at. How you can step into this energy while you're creating those videos more in the future, but they've been really effective and helpful. So I want to acknowledge you for
1:13:11 Lewis Howes? one, having the courage to show up for your 15 year old self, even if it was many years later and and create the thing you wanted to create, even when you didn't feel like you were ready. And two, for sticking with it after you quit for a period of time, sabotage yourself and coming back to it, which is also a scary thing to do. So I acknowledge you for doing that because you've been helping a lot of people over the last few years. And your content, the way you share it from your unique experience and your personality. Is of service to a lot of people. So I acknowledge you for being consistent, Katie, and for for helping a lot of people with your message. You also got a meditation app coming out called Presence. It's coming out pretty soon. So if they go to your YouTube channel, they can learn more about that.
1:13:56 Lewis Howes? If they want to learn more on how to tap into this power that they have inside of them, they can check out the app as well. I've got a couple of final questions for you, Katie. This one's called the three truths. Imagine you get to live as long as you want, but it's your final day on earth. And you get to have everything manifest in your life. You get to create whatever you want to create. But in the last day, in this hypothetical scenario, you have to take all of your content with you. So we don't have access to your message anymore. But you get to leave behind three final truths. Three lessons that you would leave behind where we would get to keep and have access to. What would those three truths be for you?
1:14:33 Speaker 00 You are so much bigger than your circumstances. And the only way that you're going to find out that you're bigger than your circumstances is to start acting like you're bigger than your circumstances. So you are either defining your circumstances or your circumstances are defining you. That is the first one. The second one is the answers that you are looking for are within you. They're always going to be within you. And when you feel yourself getting lost or straying from the path or not knowing what's going on, getting caught up in things outside you, just remember that all of the answers, all of the clarity,
1:15:15 Speaker 00 it's all right there within you, waiting for you to come back to yourself to be able to connect to it again. Well, the third one is that you are incredibly powerful and your power will be found in meeting, facing, healing, integrating all the parts of you that believe that you don't have any.
1:15:32 Lewis Howes? And final question, what's your definition of greatness?
1:15:35 Speaker 00 To me, greatness is having the courage to be authentic, to be who you really are, to be who you were divinely designed to be. No matter what that requires you to face or get rid of or change. That to me is greatness because greatness is different to every single person.
1:15:57 Lewis Howes? Yeah.
1:15:58 Speaker 00 But it depends on what you were designed to do in the flesh.
1:16:01 Lewis Howes? Yeah. Katie, thanks so much for being here.
1:16:03 Speaker 00 Thank you.
1:16:04 Lewis Howes? Appreciate you.
1:16:04 Speaker 00 Thank you.
1:16:05 Lewis Howes? I hope you enjoyed today's episode and it inspired you on your journey towards greatness. Make sure to check out the show notes in the description for a full rundown of today's episode with all the important links. And if you want weekly exclusive bonus episodes with me personally, as well as ad free listening, then make sure to subscribe to our Greatness Plus channel exclusively on Apple Podcasts. Share this with a friend on social media and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts as well. Let me know what you enjoyed about this episode in that review. I really love hearing feedback from you and it helps us figure out how we can support and serve you moving forward. And I want to remind you, if no one has told you lately, that you are loved, you are worthy, and you matter. And
1:16:49 Lewis Howes? now it's time to go out there and do something great.
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