Bonus #193 - Jourdain Fisher [PATREON PREVIEW]

Patreon preview. Unlock full episode at https://www.patreon.com/stavvysworld Jourdain Fisher joins the pod to discuss his new special Bits & Pieces (out now on Youtube), Lindsey Graham’s hell, his divorced dad’s air hockey table, his and Stav’s humble early stand-up days in NYC, breaking his leg in a trampoline park as an adult, and much more. Jourdain and Stav help callers including a man who’s bitter that his wife’s vanity business is losing money, and a man grappling with severe PTSD after his dog fatally jumped off a building and landed in front of a group of children. Watch Jourdain Fisher’s new special Bits & Pieces out now: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KWMUM_myE38 See Jourdain Fisher live and follow him on social media: https://jourdainfisher.com/ https://www.instagram.com/jourdainfisher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@jfishercomedy https://www.facebook.com/Jfishercomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@JourdainFisherComedy https://twitter.com/jfishercomedy ☎️ Want to be a part of the show? Call 904-800-STAV and leave a voicemail to get advice! 🎟️ See Stavvy live!!! https://stavvy.biz/ for tickets ‼️ Bonus episodes every week! Unlock exclusive, Patreon-only episodes at https://www.patreon.com/stavvysworld

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

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• 0:30Speaker 01

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• 0:56Speaker 02

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• 0:59Speaker 03

  Hello, Stavi, big fan. Hello, esteemed guests or guests.

• 1:05Speaker 03

  I need some advice on my marriage. It's almost 18 years in now.

• 1:09Stavros Halkias?

  Wow, congratulations.

• 1:11Speaker 03

  10 years ago, I decided to go into business for myself, working construction, repairing people's homes, so on and so forth, remodeling for them.

• 1:20Stavros Halkias?

  Nice.

• 1:20Speaker 03

  And everything was going great. My wife was behind me 100%. And she helped me every step of the way. And up until recently, she was working a $60,000 a year job. And she decided that she wanted to retire from that job and open up her own boutique store. And as she did for me, I did the same for her. I stood behind her every step of the way, financially, emotionally, physically, if you will, helping to build things, so on and so forth. And unfortunately, things didn't go as well for her store as it did go for me and my business.

• 2:01Stavros Halkias?

  Nobody makes money on boutique stores.

• 2:03Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 2:03Stavros Halkias?

  That's the most classic, I'm a, my, I'm a trophy wife.

• 2:08Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 2:08Stavros Halkias?

  And my husband wants me to stop fucking my jujitsu instructor.

• 2:13Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 2:13Stavros Halkias?

  So he gave me, so he bought me a boutique.

• 2:15Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 2:16Stavros Halkias?

  So I could pretend to run a business and stop cucking him.

• 2:19Speaker 05

  Literally.

• 2:19Stavros Halkias?

  That's why little boutiques exist.

• 2:21Speaker 05

  Yeah, yeah.

• 2:21Stavros Halkias?

  Nobody actually turns a profit on those.

• 2:23Speaker 05

  No, ever. I call those touch shit stores.

• 2:25Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah.

• 2:27Speaker 05

  You go to a small town, you're walking around with your girl, you go, you wanna go to that store and touch some shit?

• 2:32Stavros Halkias?

  That, you're so right. That's a kill 11 minutes store. Like, that's so.

• 2:36Speaker 05

  And it's just them watching you, and they're like, if you need any help, I'm right here.

• 2:40Stavros Halkias?

  We're good.

• 2:40Speaker 05

  It's like, yeah, we know you're here. I'm not gonna need any help.

• 2:44Stavros Halkias?

  I don't need a quartz owl.

• 2:46Speaker 05

  Yeah. I'm gonna turn this vase over and go, $78, god damn. And I'm gonna put it back, and I'm gonna say, thank you. And I'm gonna walk out and hear that little clingy bell.

• 2:55Stavros Halkias?

  Yes, yes, yes, dude, that's so fucking funny. Oh, my god, all right, finish this call.

• 2:59Speaker 03

  Business, and it has led us to the point today where we are in a bit of a financial pickle. So the advice I'm seeking is, do I just weather the storm and stay with this woman?

• 3:12Stavros Halkias?

  Oh, wow.

• 3:14Speaker 03

  I understand that she basically has had a gambling problem with her store and has just banked on trying to.

• 3:20Stavros Halkias?

  You see how he's really diminishing, yeah? He's workshopping his argument.

• 3:24Speaker 05

  Yeah, literally.

• 3:25Stavros Halkias?

  Or he's like, well, she's basically got a gambling problem, like, what?

• 3:28Speaker 05

  No, come on, chill, bro.

• 3:29Stavros Halkias?

  She had a dream that you should have told her was dumb. And instead, you were, you didn't have the, you didn't have the, you should have seen this coming.

• 3:36Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 3:37Stavros Halkias?

  And you should, or you should have moved this, this, like, how about we start with an Etsy store?

• 3:42Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 3:43Stavros Halkias?

  How about we start with something, how about we build up, right?

• 3:46Speaker 05

  See if we can grow your homemade lotion for us.

• 3:47Stavros Halkias?

  Yes, yes, yes. Now, look, you're past that, but clearly, this is, the fact that he immediately is like, nah, do I stay with her?

• 3:54Speaker 05

  That's crazy.

• 3:55Stavros Halkias?

  All right, let him, let him finish.

• 3:56Speaker 03

  Or has just banked on trying to make money when it really probably is not going to happen. So I'd love to hear from you, and I appreciate you all. Thank you, baby, love you.

• 4:10Stavros Halkias?

  I mean, this is crazy.

• 4:12Speaker 05

  Do you think he's just looking for a way out after 18 years?

• 4:16Stavros Halkias?

  I think that it does, 18 years is, you know, nuts in general. Like, that's a long time. And look, a lot of people are happily married. I think, yes, that's possible, but I think even if he, even if everything was good,

• 4:33Stavros Halkias?

  that's gotta, you gotta feel like such a, like, the finance, it's really the financial strain more than anything, right?

• 4:40Speaker 05

  Yeah, of course.

• 4:41Stavros Halkias?

  If she went out and did something and failed, and it was embarrassing, and he had to be there for her, and he had to whatever, but it's like, I think he's also, if I had the, he's probably mad at himself. I would be.

• 4:50Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 4:51Stavros Halkias?

  Because literally, he should have been like, look, because contractor, when you've already been working in construction, you have contacts with people that probably you know will hire you.

• 5:01Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 5:02Stavros Halkias?

  You know people you can crew up with. That is so much different than.

• 5:06Speaker 05

  Right.

• 5:06Stavros Halkias?

  Quitting a salary job, and I'm guessing something that didn't have anything to do with knickknacks. Also, what kind of, what kind of boutique is this? Do we even know?

• 5:14Speaker 05

  Yo.

• 5:15Stavros Halkias?

  So it's just a different thing. It's not, you put it, I think he's probably also mad at himself because this is not equivalent. Like.

• 5:23Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 5:24Stavros Halkias?

  She helped him start his business, but guess what? That worked. And it's not like he owes her, like, that, she was repaid with the fact that they have like a nice life together, and that this was the thing that supports them.

• 5:36Speaker 05

  I'd really like to know what the hell she's selling in this store.

• 5:38Stavros Halkias?

  Who knows?

• 5:39Speaker 05

  Cause knickknacks might really be, yo, like, imagine coming in, cause that's really what you're saying. Imagine coming into your partner and be like, I wanna sell knickknacks.

• 5:47Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah.

• 5:47Speaker 05

  That's really what you're saying.

• 5:49Stavros Halkias?

  My dream, yeah, I need, I want crystals, I want letter openers.

• 5:53Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 5:53Stavros Halkias?

  I want fucking postcards, like. And so, I don't know, dude. Yes, it, I will say this, I think, I don't think you're wrong, probably, I think probably everybody, even in really happy relationships, everyone has like a very small percent, like, in the happiest relationships, someone thinks about, what if I, what if we weren't together? What would my life look like? 0.01% of the time, or 1% of the time, right?

• 6:18Speaker 05

  Of course, yeah.

• 6:19Stavros Halkias?

  I don't think that's, just like, kind of fantasies like that, that's not unhealthy, who cares?

• 6:24Speaker 05

  No, yeah, of course.

• 6:25Stavros Halkias?

  It's just in and out of your head. But those percentage, a lot of people have different percentages, right?

• 6:30Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 6:30Stavros Halkias?

  A lot of people are in marriages that are just straight up, they hate each other, but can't leave for, they're locked into financial reasons or cultural reasons or whatever. And then there's people that maybe it's, it fluctuates. Sometimes you're happy, sometimes you're like, I should leave this fucking asshole, right?

• 6:45Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 6:46Stavros Halkias?

  And I think if he, whatever percentage he was at, your wife ruining your financial stability with a stupid dream, it wasn't even like she was trying to do something noble and it failed.

• 6:57Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 6:58Stavros Halkias?

  Having a boutique store is stupid. Like, I'm sorry.

• 7:01Speaker 05

  It's real tough.

• 7:02Stavros Halkias?

  That's fucking dumb as shit.

• 7:03Speaker 05

  Yeah, that's tough.

• 7:04Stavros Halkias?

  It's like if a man, if a man quit a job to do standup.

• 7:07Speaker 05

  You're legit.

• 7:07Stavros Halkias?

  In his 50s.

• 7:08Speaker 05

  And we've seen those people.

• 7:10Stavros Halkias?

  And we, yeah, we did open mice with them.

• 7:11Speaker 05

  Yeah, and it did not go well.

• 7:14Stavros Halkias?

  So, so like, I guess the, the thing you have to think, if you're this guy who's calling in, is like, what, really understand what percentage, what are you feeling? What percentage is what? Are you mad, like, and also, like.

• 7:28Speaker 05

  Cause it's such a big leap for him to go like, hey, do we pivot versus do I end my marriage?

• 7:35Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, it's like, and by the way, and look, I don't know what the, like, I guess this is, we don't know these people, we don't know the, the details. If she's like indignant about this, if she's like, oh, these fucking assholes let my store fail.

• 7:47Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 7:48Stavros Halkias?

  But whatever, you know, we live and learn, and then she stays with, doesn't wanna get a job, stays retired, doesn't wanna help dig them out of the hole.

• 7:55Speaker 05

  Right, yeah.

• 7:55Stavros Halkias?

  That's different than.

• 7:56Speaker 05

  Yes.

• 7:57Stavros Halkias?

  I tried to support you, maybe I feel, maybe I feel a little disappointed in myself for not helping us get through this better, or understanding there's gonna be a failure.

• 8:05Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 8:05Stavros Halkias?

  You let me down, I let myself down. Also, we have no fucking money, and I'm pissed about it.

• 8:11Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 8:12Stavros Halkias?

  Right? But we've been together for almost 20 years, we'll figure this out.

• 8:18Speaker 05

  Figure it out.

• 8:18Stavros Halkias?

  You know, like, you'll go back to, you'll get, I mean, she's 60, he said, right? She retired?

• 8:23Speaker 05

  Oh, really?

• 8:24Stavros Halkias?

  At 60, they said, isn't that what he said?

• 8:26Speaker 03

  No, he said, he said she made like $60,000.

• 8:29Speaker 05

  Oh, yeah, she made $60,000 a year, yeah.

• 8:31Stavros Halkias?

  I just heard the number 60, I was like, that's her age. My brain is fucking fried, dude. I'm in a press. I have, I have literally, there has not been like a moment I'm not doing something the last, like, I don't know, two weeks?

• 8:44Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 8:45Stavros Halkias?

  And then the week I had, like, weekend I had off, I was like, I'm gonna sleep. My mom, who never, ever asks for anything, was like, I wanna come visit New York.

• 8:54Speaker 05

  Yes.

• 8:54Stavros Halkias?

  And of course, I'm, I'm gonna be like, yeah, all right. And we had a great weekend.

• 8:57Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 8:57Stavros Halkias?

  But like, then I was like, oh, that was so fun. And I was like, ah, now to relax. And then, that's when I called you, remember I called you at Sunday at 7? I was like, fuck, don't we have to do podcasts? And he was, oh, and I hadn't booked them, thank, we got lucky, like, we, that's why I was like, oh, fuck, oh, right, fuck, George, I remembered all my friends that way. Anyway, so then if she, then they're even younger than I thought, like, for some reason, I thought she retired at 60. She just wanted to leave her corporate job and.

• 9:26Speaker 05

  Yeah, that's what I'm saying, like, there might be a chance.

• 9:29Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, I mean, of course, it's annoying, right?

• 9:31Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 9:31Stavros Halkias?

  Obviously, but if she's willing to just be like, all right, we gave it a work, we gave it a go, I fucked up.

• 9:38Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 9:39Stavros Halkias?

  I'm gonna help get us out of this.

• 9:40Speaker 05

  Mm-hmm.

• 9:41Stavros Halkias?

  I think it's a little extreme. My immediate reaction is, I think it's a little extreme to be like, do I leave, do I punish this woman?

• 9:48Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 9:49Stavros Halkias?

  For making it harder for me to go on vacation for the next four years?

• 9:53Speaker 05

  Right, legit.

• 9:54Stavros Halkias?

  By leaving her.

• 9:55Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 9:55Stavros Halkias?

  And look, you're probably right. Is there a part of him, if he was already on the fence?

• 10:00Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 10:00Stavros Halkias?

  This is what, and, and we do hear some real frustration.

• 10:03Speaker 05

  Yeah, there's some real frustration, but like, to be bipartisan about it, it's like, how many times have like, look, as people in comedy, like, how many times have we seen the wives or girlfriends support you through the fucking, you suck face?

• 10:15Stavros Halkias?

  100%, yeah. Yeah, exactly. And so, like, and, and, and even though, as I was saying, I think that's a dumb idea, and I probably would have second guessed it, whatever. She did, and I did say you had a better business plan than her. Like you said, she did help you get it off the ground, right?

• 10:34Speaker 05

  Exactly, yeah.

• 10:34Stavros Halkias?

  So that's what a fucking marriage is.

• 10:35Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 10:36Stavros Halkias?

  All right, you guys should have had, you as a team should have had a better plan with this boutique, right? It didn't happen, yours was successful, hers wasn't. They said, it set you back a few years.

• 10:46Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 10:46Stavros Halkias?

  But I think it's a little extreme to go to divorce.

• 10:49Speaker 05

  Yeah, yeah, you never go full boutique.

• 10:51Stavros Halkias?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, do a from-home boutique. Literally be a fucking reseller on eBay if you really want.

• 10:57Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 10:57Stavros Halkias?

  But, but anyway, so there was mistakes, mistakes were made, it's fine. But I think as long as she's being realistic about this and being like,

• 11:04Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 11:05Stavros Halkias?

  "All right, let's figure this, sorry," and she's, even a little like, "I fucked up, we'll figure this out." If, I say it's kind of extreme, but, so you, our caller needs to think, what, because we, you know, his gambling addiction line, what's the root of that?

• 11:21Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 11:22Stavros Halkias?

  Is that you just being mad and sort of lashing out? That's okay, you can do, you can be a little mad for a little bit. But eventually, you need cooler, you need to settle down, see what you're actually feeling that when it's not fresh.

• 11:35Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 11:36Stavros Halkias?

  And decide, what am I, what do I actually want? I do think it's kind of cra- like,

• 11:40Speaker 05

  It's crazy to just end it.

• 11:42Stavros Halkias?

  And that's coming from me, who's like a very like, you know, people on this, on the show, I, I take a very libertine view of most, like, relationships and stuff. Whereas like, even I'm like, "You're gonna fucking divorce your wife."

• 11:55Speaker 05

  Yeah, yeah.

• 11:56Stavros Halkias?

  Because you guys together tried to make your dream come true and it didn't work.

• 11:59Speaker 05

  Yeah, it'd be different if she had a history of like,

• 12:01Stavros Halkias?

  Totally.

• 12:02Speaker 05

  Doing those things, but it's like,

• 12:04Stavros Halkias?

  If she had, if she had multiple times.

• 12:06Speaker 05

  Businesses, or "I'm gonna do this multi-level marketing thing," whatever.

• 12:09Stavros Halkias?

  Or was, or was literally a gamble, or had literally had a gambling problem, right?

• 12:14Speaker 05

  But like, I think just make a little pivot, you know, maybe she downsizes to a farmer's market booth on the weekends.

• 12:20Stavros Halkias?

  I think she's fucking, I think she's gotta fucking fire up Indeed and get her fucking, I think, I think she's the update her LinkedIn. I don't think it's a farmer's market, I think it's time to get a fucking job, baby girl.

• 12:30Speaker 05

  But I'm saying like, do that, but like, if you still wanna do.

• 12:33Stavros Halkias?

  Slowly over time, yes, exactly.

• 12:34Speaker 05

  Yeah, it's like, yo, on the weekends, you do your little selling, your, your wares.

• 12:37Stavros Halkias?

  Oh, interesting, because I was thinking.

• 12:39Speaker 05

  Monday through Friday, work, and then on Sundays, like, yo, these beeswax soaps that you have are really flying off the shelves.

• 12:46Stavros Halkias?

  I, I mean, that's, that's, that's what a good guy you are, you're still trying to support this woman. In my head, I'm like, "All right, we gave it a try, or it's over." "No more dreams, go do spreadsheets." "You fucked me, I was gonna get a vacation house." So yeah, dude, figure out, I guess, whatever, you fucking get it, decide. If you're just using this as an excuse to divorce her, don't be, you know, it's got a real, this can't be the real reason, that seems insane to me.

• 13:15Speaker 05

  Yeah.