Harland Williams & Your Lips are Udamu

Comedian Harland Williams returns. We chat armadillos as tanks, monkeys vs apes, colonoscopy talk, the mystery of the clitoris, the horny toad defense system, Bobby’s cameo in Harland’s movie, and Wingman. TigerBelly video now available to watch on Spotify. Spotify Premium users get fewer ads! This episode is sponsored by: Klarna, Hims, Shopify --Download the Klarna app today or visit http://Klarna.com http://Klarna.com/ to learn more --For simple, online access to personalized and affordable care for Hair Loss, Weight Loss, and more, visit http://Hims.com/BELLY --Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at http://SHOPIFY. COM/TIGERBELLY SUBSCRIBE to TigerBelly!! http://bit.ly/SubscribeToTigerBelly New Merch is Only @ https://sleptkingdom.com https://sleptkingdom.com/ Watch our Clips http://bit.ly/TigerBellyCLIPS More Harland Williams Harland Highway Podcast: @HarlandHighwayPodcast Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/harlandwilliams / harlandwilliams https://www.instagram.com/harlandwilliams Harbling Shirts etc.: https://www.harbling.com https://www.harbling.com/ Official Website: https://www.harlandwilliams.com https://www.harlandwilliams.com/ More TigerBelly Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tigerbelly / tigerbelly https://www.instagram.com/tigerbelly Twitter: https://twitter.com/thetigerbelly / thetigerbelly https://twitter.com/thetigerbelly Facebook: http://fb.me/sleptkingdom Audio Podcast: http://tigerbelly.libsyn.com http://tigerbelly.libsyn.com/ Official Website: http://thetigerbelly.com http://thetigerbelly.com/ More Bobby Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bobbyleelive / bobbyleelive https://www.instagram.com/bobbyleelive Twitter: https://twitter.com/bobbyleelive / bobbyleelive https://twitter.com/bobbyleelive Website: https://bobbylee.live https://bobbylee.live/ More Khalyla Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/khalamityk / khalamityk https://www.instagram.com/khalamityk Twitter: https://twitter.com/khalamityk / khalamityk https://twitter.com/khalamityk Trash Tuesday Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/c/TrashTuesday / trashtuesday https://www.youtube.com/c/TrashTuesday Ebb Ocean Club: https://ebboceanclub.com https://ebboceanclub.com/ More Jaime Garcia @fatfishpodcast https://www.instagram.com/thejaimegarcia / thejaimegarcia https://www.instagram.com/thejaimegarcia More Rudy Jules https://www.instagram.com/rudyjuless / rudyjuless https://www.instagram.com/rudyjuless More Gilbert Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/gilbits / gilbits https://www.instagram.com/gilbits More PD George Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/george_kimmel / george_kimmel https://www.instagram.com/george_kimmel Karma Farm: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC9myUpJuY59YdamSqdYXNSQ / @7equis https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC9myUpJuY59YdamSqdYXNSQ Edited by Can Nguyen: 🍬 https://www.candyworldmedia.com https://www.candyworldmedia.com/ Branding & Art Direction: Dinger Creative Connor DeHaan: https://www.instagram.com/cdehaan / cdehaan https://www.instagram.com/cdehaan Elijah Vary: https://www.instagram.com/elijahvary / elijahvary https://www.instagram.com/elijahvary Website: http://dingercreative.com/ Title Sequence & Animation: Travis Ragsdale: https://www.instagram.com/travisragsdale / travisragsdale https://www.instagram.com/travisragsdale Website: http://travisragsdale.com http://travisragsdale.com/ Mail TigerBelly 1626 N. Wilcox Ave. # 161 Hollywood, CA 90028 TigerBelly is the #1 Asian Podcast. You can watch more of Bobby Lee and Khalyla Kuhn on Podcasts and more here! http://bit.ly/TigerBellyAppearances This video contains paid advertising. #tigerbelly https://www.youtube.com/hashtag/tigerbelly #bobbylee https://www.youtube.com/hashtag/bobbylee #khalyla https://www.youtube.com/hashtag/khalyla #podcast https://www.youtube.com/hashtag/podcast See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

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• 0:43Speaker 00

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• 1:26Bobby Lee?

  What's that you're wearing? It smells like white lotus or something.

• 1:30Speaker 02

  That's my hair oil.

• 1:32Speaker 00

  Oh, you should get him some.

• 1:34Bobby Lee?

  I haven't heard that term in a long time. Really? My hair oil? No, that's my hair oil. Oh, really? Who'd you hear that from before in the past? I don't know. I think I heard it. Your grandmother. Your grandmother. No, no, it was a shell station in Bakersfield. Oh, I see. Was she working behind the counter? I don't know. Yeah, you don't know anything, do you? I don't know much. I know.

• 1:53Speaker 02

  Does it smell good to you?

• 1:54Bobby Lee?

  What?

• 1:55Speaker 02

  Does it smell good to you?

• 1:56Bobby Lee?

  It smells good, yeah. Yeah, yeah. It's her product that she created. You created a product?

• 2:01Speaker 02

  Sassafora. Do you want one?

• 2:02Bobby Lee?

  Sassafora?

• 2:03Speaker 02

  Sassafora.

• 2:05Bobby Lee?

  What'd she say? Sassafora, Sassafora. It's pronounced Sephora. Oh, it is? Yeah, it's already a big company. All right, I didn't know that. They sell makeup all over North America. North America. Yep.

• 2:18Speaker 02

  Whole world.

• 2:19Bobby Lee?

  Your eyes.

• 2:22Speaker 03

  Say it.

• 2:24Bobby Lee?

  Your eyes.

• 2:25Speaker 02

  Get the hair oil, hair oil. That's not the hair oil.

• 2:29Speaker 03

  Don't leave my eyes hanging. I'm seducing the camera. You said your eye and then you just left it and I'm doing this.

• 2:35Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. I want you to keep doing it.

• 2:37Speaker 03

  I am, but you just like left it.

• 2:39Bobby Lee?

  Your eyes are blue as the.

• 2:43Speaker 02

  Oh, bless you.

• 2:43Bobby Lee?

  I wrecked it. You fucking wrecked it, dude.

• 2:46Speaker 03

  I'm seducing, I'm seducing.

• 2:47Bobby Lee?

  Are you being real right now, dude?

• 2:49Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 2:49Bobby Lee?

  Are you being absolutely real right now, dude?

• 2:51Speaker 04

  Can I get a bless you?

• 2:52Bobby Lee?

  Bless you.

• 2:53Speaker 02

  I did, I gave you one.

• 2:54Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, bless you.

• 2:55Speaker 03

  No, I'm seducing six cameras and I get like a SARS sneeze.

• 2:59Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. You got a, there was more bird flu?

• 3:01Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 3:02Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, it was a bird flu, yeah.

• 3:03Speaker 03

  Could we do it again without the infection?

• 3:05Bobby Lee?

  I really can't.

• 3:06Speaker 03

  Well, what about what I want? Not what you want?

• 3:09Bobby Lee?

  I'll try it again.

• 3:11Speaker 03

  Thanks, that's all I asked.

• 3:14Bobby Lee?

  Uh, your nose.

• 3:17Speaker 03

  Eyes.

• 3:17Bobby Lee?

  I wanna go nose.

• 3:19Speaker 03

  I don't do nose.

• 3:21Bobby Lee?

  You don't do nose?

• 3:22Speaker 03

  I don't do nose.

• 3:23Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Uh, uh, uh, uh, your eyes are as deep as an open wound on a blue whale's fin.

• 3:36Speaker 03

  Thank you.

• 3:37Bobby Lee?

  You're welcome. Well, give me one.

• 3:40Speaker 03

  Your eyes are as puffy as a lemon meringue pie. I'm not finished, why do you?

• 3:47Bobby Lee?

  Oh, it's alright.

• 3:48Speaker 03

  Your eyes are as puffy, I'm changing it to a blueberry cobbler

• 3:52Bobby Lee?

  Mm-hmm.

• 3:53Speaker 03

  on my grandmother's window ledge.

• 3:55Bobby Lee?

  Mm.

• 3:56Speaker 03

  and four chickadees fly down and peck at the cinnamony crust on top. Up.

• 4:04Bobby Lee?

  Okay. Let's go more, uh, what, do, can you do one to me or?

• 4:09Speaker 02

  Mm-mm.

• 4:10Bobby Lee?

  Can I do one to you?

• 4:11Speaker 02

  Mm-mm. Okay, yeah. My eyes, though?

• 4:13Bobby Lee?

  No, not your eyes.

• 4:14Speaker 02

  Uh, oh yeah, my lips, since you make fun of them a lot.

• 4:17Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 4:18Speaker 02

  Mm, okay.

• 4:19Bobby Lee?

  Your lips are like a Seth. Can I start over?

• 4:25Bobby Lee?

  Can I start over?

• 4:26Speaker 02

  Whoa.

• 4:29Bobby Lee?

  Seth Green.

• 4:30Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 4:30Bobby Lee?

  That's what I'm saying.

• 4:31Speaker 03

  Start over, start over.

• 4:32Bobby Lee?

  That's what I'm saying, start over.

• 4:33Speaker 03

  That's a woman, that's a lady. You don't, you don't Seth Green a woman.

• 4:37Bobby Lee?

  Alright.

• 4:38Speaker 02

  You don't Seth Green me.

• 4:39Bobby Lee?

  Alright.

• 4:40Speaker 02

  Alright.

• 4:41Bobby Lee?

  Your lips are like a North, North Ca- fuck.

• 4:44Speaker 03

  Wow, dude, are you okay?

• 4:46Bobby Lee?

  I can't do it, no, I'm not okay today.

• 4:47Speaker 03

  What's going on?

• 4:48Bobby Lee?

  Give me another one.

• 4:50Speaker 03

  Look to her lip.

• 4:50Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I'm gonna do. Your lips look like a West Congo lake pufferfish.

• 4:58Speaker 02

  Oh, I like pufferfish.

• 4:59Bobby Lee?

  Deep within, you mean, a quagmire of different rocks that smashed his face in. And the moisture, what they call blood, form a puffy gel, right, called unumu.

• 5:15Speaker 02

  Udamu.

• 5:16Bobby Lee?

  That was not as good as yours.

• 5:18Speaker 03

  I would have just said.

• 5:19Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I tried to go along with you. I don't think I'm as good at that.

• 5:23Speaker 03

  I would have.

• 5:23Bobby Lee?

  That's it. That's what I was talking about.

• 5:25Speaker 03

  Udamu was all you needed. You could have just gone, "Your lips are unumu."

• 5:29Bobby Lee?

  Oh, I. Ah.

• 5:32Speaker 03

  You did all that other hyperbole.

• 5:34Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, hyperbole. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Isn't that what you did? Isn't that what you did?

• 5:38Speaker 03

  Uh, I do what's called eloquent.

• 5:41Bobby Lee?

  Oh, you do eloquent?

• 5:42Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 5:43Bobby Lee?

  Can you teach me eloquent?

• 5:44Speaker 03

  Sure.

• 5:44Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, teach me something.

• 5:46Speaker 03

  Well, let's see, some lettuce, guy.

• 5:49Bobby Lee?

  Lettuce?

• 5:50Speaker 03

  I'm not giving you a freebie.

• 5:52Bobby Lee?

  You need money.

• 5:53Speaker 03

  Yeah, lettuce.

• 5:53Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah, lettuce.

• 5:55Speaker 03

  I'll stat you some lettuce.

• 5:57Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, you want some lettuce?

• 5:58Speaker 03

  What do you got?

• 5:59Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, what do you got?

• 6:00Speaker 03

  What do you got, play hair?

• 6:01Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, here you go. How you doing? You want some fucking lettuce?

• 6:05Speaker 03

  Go, give me the lettuce.

• 6:06Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, here's some lettuce for you, baby. What's up? A dollar.

• 6:09Speaker 03

  Okay, what do you want? What word?

• 6:12Bobby Lee?

  No, but teach me how to do eloquence.

• 6:14Speaker 03

  I am, but you gotta give me the topic you want.

• 6:16Bobby Lee?

  Oh, really?

• 6:17Speaker 03

  You're paying for it. His face.

• 6:20Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Do his face.

• 6:23Speaker 03

  Your face is like a jack-o'-lantern glowing in the night on Jeffrey Dahmer's front porch. It's illuminated with candles, and you end up eating your own face because you're a cannibal, you freak. And that was a bonus. I did a bonus freak at the end.

• 6:43Bobby Lee?

  I think what it is, is that unumu was an essential. Um, what do you call it?

• 6:49Speaker 03

  What do we call what?

• 6:50Bobby Lee?

  That, when he goes freak, what do you call you?

• 6:52Speaker 02

  Oh, oh, oh, um.

• 6:53Speaker 03

  Automonopia?

• 6:54Speaker 02

  Auto, well, yeah, kind of.

• 6:56Bobby Lee?

  Accentuate.

• 6:57Speaker 02

  Oh.

• 6:58Bobby Lee?

  Is that the word, accentuate?

• 6:59Speaker 03

  Accentuate, not accentuate, accentuate.

• 7:03Bobby Lee?

  Accentuate.

• 7:04Speaker 03

  But to me, it was just a bonus. I threw, because you gave me a dollar.

• 7:06Bobby Lee?

  Oh, you said bonus, okay.

• 7:07Speaker 03

  You're a friend.

• 7:08Bobby Lee?

  We are?

• 7:09Speaker 03

  Yeah, if you think I'm just gonna do one and not give a buddy a freebie, a bonus at the end.

• 7:14Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 7:15Speaker 03

  So I added on, I could have just said freak.

• 7:17Bobby Lee?

  Oh, so if I give you more money?

• 7:18Speaker 03

  But I went.

• 7:20Bobby Lee?

  Oh, right, if I give you more.

• 7:23Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 7:23Speaker 03

  And that's a bonus.

• 7:24Bobby Lee?

  Let's see what else do I have here?

• 7:25Speaker 03

  Oh, you want another one?

• 7:26Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, here's a two, rare two dollar bill.

• 7:29Speaker 03

  Oh, wow.

• 7:30Bobby Lee?

  Wow, you don't see these anymore.

• 7:32Speaker 03

  Why do you have a rare two dollar bill?

• 7:34Bobby Lee?

  It's luck, it's my lucky two dollar bill, I'll never use it.

• 7:37Speaker 03

  So it's been in your wallet for how long?

• 7:39Bobby Lee?

  Twenty-five years.

• 7:41Speaker 03

  Wow, dude. Wow.

• 7:43Bobby Lee?

  What do I get for this?

• 7:45Speaker 03

  Well, you give me another word, another.

• 7:48Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, but this one has to be two minutes long.

• 7:51Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 7:54Speaker 03

  You think that's hard for me?

• 7:55Bobby Lee?

  No, I don't think it's hard for you. Can, can somebody have a timer?

• 7:58Speaker 02

  Yep.

• 7:58Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, I time this one, right? And then, uh, I'm gonna tell, uh, you're gonna do George, our producer's face.

• 8:05Speaker 03

  But they can't see him, so they don't know.

• 8:07Bobby Lee?

  All right.

• 8:08Speaker 03

  But if you wanna.

• 8:08Bobby Lee?

  Talk about my nose, then.

• 8:10Speaker 02

  Oh, you got a timer up there?

• 8:11Bobby Lee?

  You talking about my nose?

• 8:12Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 8:13Bobby Lee?

  My lips?

• 8:14Speaker 03

  Yeah, how about your whole face?

• 8:16Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, do my whole face.

• 8:17Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 8:17Bobby Lee?

  Two minutes.

• 8:18Speaker 03

  Two minutes.

• 8:19Bobby Lee?

  For a, a rare two dollar bill.

• 8:20Speaker 03

  Who's timing it?

• 8:21Bobby Lee?

  We are right now.

• 8:22Speaker 03

  Oh, so I don't get paid till after I do it?

• 8:24Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 8:25Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 8:26Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 8:26Speaker 03

  Tell me when the timer starts.

• 8:28Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, four, three, two, one.

• 8:31Speaker 03

  Your face puffs in the night like a lighthouse at the edge of the world. It radiates a soft yellow light across the top of the ocean, flickering, dancing, square dancing, sniffing the night like a anteater blowing ants backwards out of its nose. Your eyes drip down your face like runny fried eggs in the dumpster in Denny's. And the massive pussy zit on your chin boils like a volcano crying in the night. Your whiskers dangle down like elk pubis, brushing the forest floor where the mushroom people live.

• 9:15Speaker 03

  The elves and the ants fleeing, thinking that perhaps, maybe this time, the hair monster has come. Your eyes and your hair, your cheeks puffed up like Chinese roasted potatoes, boiling in a pot, deep in the heart of Koreatown, even though the Chinese, your ears, full of wax, finding their way in the middle of the night, to the European Wax Center at 5729 Melrose Boulevard, and dripping, dripping through the blackness of night,

• 9:58Speaker 03

  onto an altar boy, crying, crying behind the Dairy Queen, in the middle of winter, where two homosexuals are playing in the snow, and making snow anals. Yes, your face puffs like a disease, dripping down the side of Helen Keller's hairy leg, and forming a puddle that inches its way closer to the sea, where the salmon spawn, and squirt.

• 10:32Bobby Lee?

  You did it. Time. Wow. Wow, here you go, baby. Wow.

• 10:41Speaker 02

  I like, my favorite was the European Wax Center. Cause I've been there, I've gotten my bush wax there.

• 10:46Speaker 03

  You did?

• 10:47Speaker 02

  Once upon a time, yeah.

• 10:48Speaker 03

  See, I went in there about three weeks ago. I was driving by, and I saw this, it's at a strip mall, it's an European Wax Center, and I was like, I haven't bought candles in ages. And I go in.

• 11:03Bobby Lee?

  Are you being real?

• 11:03Speaker 03

  I'm being real, I come out.

• 11:04Bobby Lee?

  You thought it was a candle store?

• 11:06Speaker 03

  I went in to get candles, I was looking, blueberry, cran, cinnamon, raspberry. I came out an hour later with a Brazilian, and I've been walking sideways like a horseshoe crab for about three weeks.

• 11:21Bobby Lee?

  That's not what that is. I never thought it was a ca- yeah.

• 11:24Speaker 03

  Now I know.

• 11:24Bobby Lee?

  Why do you think a normal person would have been like, "Oh, you don't sell candles here, I'm gonna leave"?

• 11:28Speaker 03

  Well... European Wax Center. Like, guys don't know.

• 11:34Bobby Lee?

  You're Canadian.

• 11:35Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 11:35Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 11:36Speaker 03

  But Europ- do you know what, like, a Wax Center is?

• 11:39Bobby Lee?

  Yes, I do.

• 11:40Speaker 03

  You're a guy.

• 11:41Bobby Lee?

  I know.

• 11:41Speaker 03

  Have you ever been- did you ever go through what I went through?

• 11:44Bobby Lee?

  No, I never did.

• 11:45Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 11:46Bobby Lee?

  What do you mean, okay?

• 11:47Speaker 03

  Well, I went through a trauma.

• 11:49Bobby Lee?

  Oh, it's a trauma?

• 11:50Speaker 03

  Well, you seem to just be rolling off.

• 11:52Bobby Lee?

  I know, you pay for your own trauma?

• 11:54Speaker 03

  I didn't know. I thought I was getting a candle.

• 11:56Bobby Lee?

  Oh, oh, I see.

• 11:58Speaker 03

  I thought I was getting a-

• 11:59Bobby Lee?

  Oh, so you probably went in there.

• 12:00Speaker 03

  Right.

• 12:01Bobby Lee?

  Can I buy a candle?

• 12:02Speaker 03

  Right.

• 12:03Bobby Lee?

  Which is code word for, can I get waxed?

• 12:05Speaker 03

  They slapped me down.

• 12:06Bobby Lee?

  They slapped- you paid?

• 12:08Speaker 03

  I paid.

• 12:08Bobby Lee?

  You went back in- inside a room?

• 12:10Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 12:11Bobby Lee?

  Right? They laid you down?

• 12:12Speaker 03

  Pulled my pants off.

• 12:13Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, and you go, whoa, where are my candles?

• 12:15Speaker 03

  Yeah, and they waxed my vagina.

• 12:20Bobby Lee?

  I heard your vagina is very nice.

• 12:22Speaker 03

  It's smooth.

• 12:23Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, it's very good. I'd like to see it one day.

• 12:26Speaker 03

  You would?

• 12:26Bobby Lee?

  They're like armadillo toes?

• 12:28Speaker 03

  No, I said it's-

• 12:30Bobby Lee?

  Is that what you said?

• 12:31Speaker 03

  You'd like to see it one day?

• 12:32Bobby Lee?

  Did you say- they look like armadillo toes?

• 12:34Speaker 03

  No, I said it's as smooth as an armadillo's and then you cut me off.

• 12:38Bobby Lee?

  Oh, I created toes.

• 12:40Speaker 03

  But if you'd like to see it, I can show you now.

• 12:42Bobby Lee?

  I'd like to see it, I was kidding.

• 12:42Speaker 03

  I'd love to show it.

• 12:43Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But does it look beautiful?

• 12:45Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 12:46Bobby Lee?

  No, no, no, sit down, sit down. What are you doing?

• 12:48Speaker 03

  You said you wanted to see it?

• 12:49Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I don't want to see your fucking vagina right now.

• 12:51Speaker 03

  Why not?

• 12:52Bobby Lee?

  Because I don't- because I don't like armadillo toes.

• 12:54Speaker 03

  You just said you wanted to see it.

• 12:57Speaker 03

  What the hell's wrong with you?

• 12:58Bobby Lee?

  Honestly, please sit down.

• 12:59Speaker 03

  Why won't you let me show it?

• 13:00Bobby Lee?

  Just don't be- don't be- what are you doing, dude?

• 13:02Speaker 03

  I'm trying to show-

• 13:02Bobby Lee?

  Don't put your dick out, dude.

• 13:04Speaker 03

  Well, fix it.

• 13:09Speaker 03

  Quit pretending you don't know how to do this.

• 13:14Bobby Lee?

  This loop right here.

• 13:17Speaker 03

  Nice belt.

• 13:17Bobby Lee?

  And we're gonna go sit down.

• 13:19Speaker 03

  Okay. Well, I don't know why you asked me.

• 13:21Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 13:22Speaker 03

  Anyways, how are you? Good.

• 13:26Speaker 03

  How are your pants?

• 13:28Bobby Lee?

  That's what it looked like. Okay, good.

• 13:30Speaker 03

  Oh, that's an armadillo.

• 13:31Bobby Lee?

  Thank you for the reference. Yeah.

• 13:33Speaker 03

  It's like rough, though.

• 13:33Speaker 04

  That's scaly.

• 13:34Bobby Lee?

  It's scaly.

• 13:35Speaker 03

  Yeah. Those things are like nature's tanks. I used to drive an 18 wheeler. And I was down in Florida.

• 13:43Bobby Lee?

  You were?

• 13:43Speaker 03

  And one of these things ran across the road. I hit it.

• 13:48Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 13:48Speaker 03

  And my 18 wheeler flipped up over and and that little hole, that little critter just kept going. It kept going.

• 13:55Bobby Lee?

  Don't call that a whore.

• 13:56Speaker 03

  It ruined my rig.

• 13:58Bobby Lee?

  Oh, you can call it a whore.

• 13:59Speaker 03

  If something ruins my 18 wheeler, my Mac, I'm gonna call it a you know what.

• 14:03Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. Did it survive?

• 14:05Speaker 03

  Yeah, I told you, it ran off.

• 14:07Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 14:07Speaker 03

  Of my rig, and I was hauling, uh, rebar. And that's heavy.

• 14:14Speaker 03

  And this.

• 14:14Bobby Lee?

  Oh, rebar, yeah, that's very heavy.

• 14:16Speaker 03

  Hit it, and then the whole rig.

• 14:17Bobby Lee?

  Wow, I didn't know that armadillos were that strong.

• 14:20Speaker 03

  Over, boom.

• 14:21Bobby Lee?

  Boom.

• 14:21Speaker 03

  Off he goes to eat mealworms and grubs.

• 14:24Bobby Lee?

  Right.

• 14:24Speaker 03

  Dragonfly larva.

• 14:25Bobby Lee?

  It was almost as if Michael Bay was there filming it.

• 14:28Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 14:29Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Or who?

• 14:30Speaker 03

  Christopher Nolan. Dark Knight. Who's your nutty friend?

• 14:36Bobby Lee?

  I got him from a special place.

• 14:38Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 14:38Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 14:38Speaker 03

  You don't know Christopher, Christopher Nolan? Dark Knight, he flips the whole rig over. He did? Yeah.

• 14:45Bobby Lee?

  Don't just do a Michael Bay joke.

• 14:47Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 14:47Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 14:47Speaker 03

  Oh, cuz you know him, right?

• 14:49Bobby Lee?

  Don't be like this. I mean, Harland knows a lot of people.

• 14:53Speaker 03

  Are you having a fight?

• 14:54Bobby Lee?

  No, we're not having a fight.

• 14:55Speaker 03

  I know Michael Bay.

• 14:56Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, don't you, yeah, he goes to the store a lot.

• 14:59Speaker 03

  I did a commercial for him once.

• 15:01Bobby Lee?

  Did you really?

• 15:01Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 15:02Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I did one too for him as well.

• 15:03Speaker 03

  Which one? Can we talk about it?

• 15:05Bobby Lee?

  I don't wanna talk about it. Don't wanna talk about it.

• 15:07Speaker 03

  Can you name the product at least?

• 15:09Bobby Lee?

  It was Pepsi, Pepsi, Pepsi, Pepsi.

• 15:13Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 15:15Bobby Lee?

  What, was yours from Squirt?

• 15:16Speaker 03

  I did a squirt commercial for him.

• 15:22Bobby Lee?

  Wow, yeah. No, but, um, this guy right here, um, do you guys, have you met before him?

• 15:28Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 15:29Bobby Lee?

  You were?

• 15:29Speaker 03

  Last time I was here.

• 15:30Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, and you, you like him?

• 15:33Speaker 03

  I don't know him well enough.

• 15:35Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 15:35Speaker 03

  I don't dislike him.

• 15:36Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, but what is it?

• 15:37Speaker 03

  But I, I don't know him.

• 15:38Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, what is the feeling, though? Is it positive or negative?

• 15:41Speaker 03

  Positive.

• 15:42Bobby Lee?

  It's a positive feeling?

• 15:43Speaker 03

  Yeah, seems like a friendly, nice, nice guy, but.

• 15:45Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 15:46Speaker 03

  I don't know him.

• 15:47Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 15:48Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 15:49Bobby Lee?

  I'm trying to give you knuckles.

• 15:50Speaker 04

  Well, I've seen him at the store too, so.

• 15:52Speaker 03

  Yeah, now and then.

• 15:53Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, now and then.

• 15:54Speaker 03

  But I don't know him. I don't know him.

• 15:55Bobby Lee?

  But if you saw him at the Comedy Store, would you say hi?

• 15:58Speaker 03

  Yeah, I've said hi to him.

• 15:59Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 15:59Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 16:00Bobby Lee?

  Sometimes you ignore me.

• 16:01Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 16:02Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, why?

• 16:04Speaker 03

  I like to play a little game of mystery with you.

• 16:07Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, you and I are mystery people.

• 16:08Speaker 03

  I like to keep you on a hook.

• 16:10Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 16:11Speaker 03

  I like to keep you on a line and a hook. I like you to never know if you're on steady ground with me.

• 16:16Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, and you're not.

• 16:18Speaker 03

  I like to play with your mind.

• 16:20Bobby Lee?

  Your mind and your toes.

• 16:21Speaker 03

  I like to kind of keep you like on your heels.

• 16:24Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 16:25Speaker 03

  I never want you to know where you sit with me or how we stand.

• 16:29Bobby Lee?

  Who you are.

• 16:30Speaker 03

  Or what I'm all about.

• 16:32Bobby Lee?

  What you're doing.

• 16:33Speaker 03

  What's my journey.

• 16:34Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Your mind is somewhere else. Mine's in another place.

• 16:44Bobby Lee?

  Klarna will help you with budgeting. Klarna! It lets you split purchases into different payment options. I love budgeting, don't you?

• 16:57Speaker 02

  I love the option to not pay the full bulk amount immediately.

• 17:01Bobby Lee?

  Exactly. Klarna offers value, transparency, control, and no surprises. Pay now, later, or overtime, whatever fits your life. Stay in control of what you spend.

• 17:11Speaker 02

  I mean, with Klarna, you always know what you owe and when, and you can get extra value through cash back and deals right on the app.

• 17:18Bobby Lee?

  Oh, I love cash back, and I love deals as well, you know? Spend smarter, turn everyday purchases into cash back, like you said, and long-term value, flexibility that fits real life.

• 17:28Speaker 02

  I just payments when plans change without stress.

• 17:30Bobby Lee?

  Do you like stress?

• 17:31Speaker 02

  I hate stress.

• 17:31Bobby Lee?

  I hate stress too, dude.

• 17:33Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's the worst.

• 17:34Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 17:34Speaker 02

  And sometimes I want something so bad, and I just don't have the money right then and there.

• 17:38Bobby Lee?

  Exactly.

• 17:38Speaker 02

  But I'm like, but I need it, I need it. And that's where Klarna is really helpful, because I'm like, you know what?

• 17:43Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 17:43Speaker 02

  I'm gonna pay this for, you know, four different times, as opposed to one time.

• 17:48Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 17:48Speaker 02

  And blow my load. I hate blowing my load. I hate blowing my load.

• 17:52Bobby Lee?

  I like edging my money.

• 17:53Speaker 02

  Thank you, me too.

• 17:55Speaker 00

  Guys, download the Klarna app today or visit klarna.com to learn more.

• 17:59Speaker 05

  See a resident loans made or arranged pursuant to a California finance law license NMLS number 1353190. Klarna balance account required to be eligible for cash back points. Limitations, terms, and conditions apply.

• 18:18Bobby Lee?

  Hair loss doesn't fix itself and the earlier you act, the better. Hims makes starting simple with 100% online process and personalized treatment plans delivered straight to you. Hims offers convenient access to a range of prescription hair loss treatments with ingredients that work, including chews, oral medication, serums, and sprays.

• 18:42Speaker 02

  Doctor trusted ingredients like finasteride and minoxidil can stop further hair loss and regrow your hair in as little as three to six months. Find the right hair regrowth treatment for you with flexible subscription options, access to 24/7 provider support, and once a day treatment options that fit your daily routine.

• 18:57Bobby Lee?

  Think of Hims as your digital treatment front door that gets you back to your old self with simple 100% online access to trusted for real health concerns, all in one place.

• 19:08Speaker 00

  Bobby, have you used Hims?

• 19:09Bobby Lee?

  Look at my, how thick my, you want me to take my hand off? Yeah, let's see it.

• 19:12Speaker 00

  Let me see that, Hims.

• 19:13Bobby Lee?

  Wow! Finasteride and minoxidil, baby!

• 19:18Speaker 00

  For simple online access to personalized and affordable care for hair loss, weight loss, and more, visit hims.com/belly. That's hims.com/belly. For your free online visit, hims.com/belly.

• 19:28Speaker 05

  Featured products include compounded drug products, which the FDA does not approve or verify for safety effectiveness or quality. Prescription required. See website for full details. Restrictions and important safety information. Individual results may vary based on studies of topical and oral minoxidil and finasteride.

• 19:46Speaker 03

  I'm thinking about you right now.

• 19:48Bobby Lee?

  I'm thinking about you too.

• 19:49Speaker 03

  I'm looking somewhere else.

• 19:50Bobby Lee?

  I was literally just thinking about you.

• 19:52Speaker 03

  But I'm looking over this way.

• 19:53Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I'm looking this way, but you know when it goes in a circle?

• 19:57Bobby Lee?

  You know how like that new space rocket that we sent around the inertia?

• 20:01Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 20:02Bobby Lee?

  That's what my mind was doing. Inertia around the moon.

• 20:06Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 20:06Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, and it went right into his brain, right? But he, his went into a black hole. Artemis. Yeah, and when I say a black hole, I'm being butthole.

• 20:13Speaker 03

  Whoa.

• 20:15Bobby Lee?

  Is it not black?

• 20:16Speaker 03

  Player.

• 20:20Bobby Lee?

  Wait, why? Was that a bad thing to say?

• 20:22Speaker 02

  I didn't say anything.

• 20:23Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, go ahead.

• 20:24Speaker 04

  I didn't say anything.

• 20:25Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 20:26Speaker 02

  I've never been up there.

• 20:28Speaker 04

  Nobody has.

• 20:29Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, but, um, I'm sure it's nice.

• 20:31Speaker 02

  Yeah, sure.

• 20:32Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 20:32Speaker 04

  Flat earth.

• 20:34Bobby Lee?

  You think it's a flat earth theory?

• 20:35Speaker 02

  Yeah, I was like.

• 20:36Speaker 04

  Yeah, everybody has a flat butthole. It's no round.

• 20:39Speaker 02

  Oh, that's actually the most untrue thing.

• 20:43Speaker 03

  You think your butthole is flat?

• 20:44Speaker 02

  Oh, it's got ridges.

• 20:47Speaker 04

  When you're sitting down like this.

• 20:48Bobby Lee?

  Harlan, you're an expert of buttholes, right?

• 20:51Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 20:51Bobby Lee?

  Right?

• 20:52Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 20:52Bobby Lee?

  In terms of the ridges, why, all the different parts?

• 20:55Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 20:55Bobby Lee?

  Right? So, when you look at a butthole, right? Those little, like, ridges, they look like wrinkles.

• 21:01Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 21:02Bobby Lee?

  And why do they exist? He's an expert, he went to college, that was your masters, no?

• 21:06Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 21:07Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. What university?

• 21:10Speaker 03

  Uh, DeVry.

• 21:10Bobby Lee?

  DeVry. Yeah, DeVry, you, five years.

• 21:14Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 21:15Bobby Lee?

  To study the butthole at DeVry University, which is a long time, I believe.

• 21:19Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 21:19Bobby Lee?

  But you got your masters in it.

• 21:20Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 21:21Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, so the wrinkles on the butthole.

• 21:23Speaker 03

  Well, they're actually not wrinkles.

• 21:25Bobby Lee?

  Okay, what do they call?

• 21:26Speaker 03

  The scientific name is. Annuples.

• 21:29Bobby Lee?

  Oh, they're annuples? And how many annuples does an average human being have?

• 21:33Speaker 03

  The average, uh, anus has, uh, forty-seven.

• 21:38Bobby Lee?

  Forty-seven?

• 21:39Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 21:39Bobby Lee?

  Annuples?

• 21:40Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 21:40Bobby Lee?

  Why do they exist?

• 21:41Speaker 03

  Well, what they do is they help the inertia of the loaf.

• 21:44Bobby Lee?

  Oh, the loaf. Is that the scientific term for, uh, feces?

• 21:50Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 21:50Bobby Lee?

  The loaf?

• 21:51Speaker 03

  The loaf.

• 21:51Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 21:52Speaker 03

  So.

• 21:53Bobby Lee?

  Why, why, wait, I'm sorry, because I'm, you know, I'm the curious fellow.

• 21:56Speaker 03

  I'm trying to give you the answer.

• 21:57Bobby Lee?

  Why, why do they call it the loaf? Because whenever I, um, poo, and I look at my poo, I don't go, oh, sourdough bread. I mean, I don't, it doesn't look like a baked.

• 22:07Speaker 03

  What does it look like to you?

• 22:09Bobby Lee?

  To me, it looks like a brown submarine.

• 22:12Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 22:12Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 22:14Speaker 03

  And if you saw a submarine in the ocean.

• 22:17Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 22:18Speaker 03

  And you put crust on it, it would look like a underwater loaf.

• 22:23Bobby Lee?

  That is so true. You're the master.

• 22:25Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 22:25Bobby Lee?

  Oh, so continue, so, the nuples?

• 22:28Speaker 03

  Yeah, the annuples.

• 22:29Bobby Lee?

  The annuples?

• 22:30Speaker 03

  Annuples.

• 22:31Bobby Lee?

  And you called it the anus?

• 22:32Speaker 03

  The anus.

• 22:34Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 22:35Speaker 03

  It just seems weird hearing the word anus and then that giggle.

• 22:41Speaker 03

  Like, I'm gonna do it again, and you'll have to force the giggle.

• 22:45Bobby Lee?

  I don't want to force the giggle.

• 22:46Speaker 03

  But just if you could, because I'm gonna...

• 22:48Bobby Lee?

  I've never heard a noose before.

• 22:50Speaker 03

  Ready? A noose. Oh, you don't have the giggle in you.

• 22:53Bobby Lee?

  I don't have the giggle anymore.

• 22:54Speaker 03

  So have you ever...

• 22:55Bobby Lee?

  Oh, do it again.

• 22:56Speaker 03

  A noose. Yeah, it's like if the Pillsbury Doughboy was addicted to ass.

• 23:03Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 23:03Speaker 03

  I think that's what it would say.

• 23:04Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 23:05Speaker 03

  Would you want me to do it in his voice? And you could do... Pillsbury Doughboy?

• 23:09Bobby Lee?

  I would like to.

• 23:09Speaker 03

  A noose.

• 23:12Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 23:12Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, it works.

• 23:13Speaker 03

  I think we found something there.

• 23:14Bobby Lee?

  We found something together.

• 23:15Speaker 03

  But back to the a noose.

• 23:18Bobby Lee?

  And the annuples. No, don't Google it.

• 23:21Speaker 03

  The annuples.

• 23:22Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, because that's rude to our professor here. Yeah, please take it out, please. Thank you.

• 23:25Speaker 03

  So there's physics behind the annuples.

• 23:28Bobby Lee?

  The annuples, yeah.

• 23:29Speaker 03

  Right. So have you ever seen, and you can bring this up if you want, the...

• 23:33Bobby Lee?

  Please don't.

• 23:34Speaker 03

  The pads on a gecko's fingers. Oh, yeah.

• 23:37Bobby Lee?

  Look that up. Pads of a gecko's fingers.

• 23:38Speaker 03

  The adhesives. It helps them, well, they're little ridges, and they help them stick to the walls, believe it or not. And so there they are.

• 23:46Bobby Lee?

  Whoa, there we are.

• 23:47Speaker 03

  You see?

• 23:47Bobby Lee?

  Is that like, if I looked at a normal human beings, an average human being's annuple?

• 23:54Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 23:54Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. I mean, because sometimes, I'm sure, it's smaller with Brad Williams.

• 23:58Speaker 03

  No, no. Picture the annuples as the lines on his fingers, but picture his palm as your a noose. So the annuples on the outer rim of your a noose...

• 24:10Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 24:11Speaker 03

  As those are designed to help him scale the walls...

• 24:14Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 24:15Speaker 03

  The annuples are designed to help pull your loaf out.

• 24:19Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 24:20Speaker 03

  It gives them traction.

• 24:21Bobby Lee?

  So it has, it does have purpose?

• 24:23Speaker 03

  It has a function. They have a function.

• 24:26Bobby Lee?

  Wait, them?

• 24:28Speaker 03

  Them. There's forty-seven of them.

• 24:29Bobby Lee?

  They, them.

• 24:30Speaker 03

  Well, it's not...

• 24:31Bobby Lee?

  We don't know.

• 24:31Speaker 03

  We don't know.

• 24:32Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. He, she, whatever.

• 24:33Speaker 03

  There's forty-seven of them.

• 24:35Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, there's forty-seven of them.

• 24:37Speaker 03

  And so have you ever been mid loaf and it's sort of, you get a log jam?

• 24:42Bobby Lee?

  What is a log jam? I, I, I don't know.

• 24:43Speaker 03

  That's when it sort of just stops. The loaf stops.

• 24:46Bobby Lee?

  Oh, it's like, like the straight of hermuz.

• 24:48Speaker 03

  Right.

• 24:49Bobby Lee?

  Yes, it's like the straight of hermuz, it just stops.

• 24:51Speaker 03

  But then all of a sudden it starts moving again and that's the nuples pulling it.

• 24:56Bobby Lee?

  Oh, right, that's because somebody announced that maybe the war's gonna end in a couple trickle out.

• 25:01Speaker 03

  No, no.

• 25:02Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 25:02Speaker 03

  You're politicizing your loaf.

• 25:04Bobby Lee?

  I am, I am, I am.

• 25:07Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 25:07Bobby Lee?

  I, I apologize.

• 25:08Speaker 03

  You're really pulling politics into your anus. We don't want to go there.

• 25:13Bobby Lee?

  I'm gonna loaf out the politics.

• 25:14Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 25:15Bobby Lee?

  All right, let's start up, all right, so.

• 25:16Speaker 03

  But if there's a log jam.

• 25:18Bobby Lee?

  A log jam, yeah.

• 25:18Speaker 03

  If you want to bring the Gecko fingers up again. The nuples serve a physical function, they help, those little ridges.

• 25:28Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 25:29Speaker 03

  They help extract the loaf.

• 25:31Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 25:31Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 25:32Bobby Lee?

  Now, can, can, that, that's.

• 25:34Speaker 03

  I mean, you asked.

• 25:35Bobby Lee?

  I know what, you went to college for it.

• 25:37Speaker 03

  DeVry, let's say the name, let's say the name.

• 25:40Bobby Lee?

  All right, you went five years to study that specific part of the human body.

• 25:44Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 25:44Bobby Lee?

  And why wouldn't I ask that question? It's a very curious question. Am I not right, Kalah?

• 25:48Speaker 03

  I don't know.

• 25:49Bobby Lee?

  So can I ask you?

• 25:50Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 25:51Bobby Lee?

  Another question?

• 25:51Speaker 03

  Go ahead, sure.

• 25:52Bobby Lee?

  Um, doctor.

• 25:53Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 25:53Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, um.

• 25:56Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, so, um, if you look at the human ethnicity, will you agree that there are ethnicities on the earth?

• 26:09Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 26:10Bobby Lee?

  Yes. Why'd you have to, why'd you have to think about it?

• 26:12Speaker 03

  No, I didn't.

• 26:13Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 26:14Speaker 03

  I said yes almost instantaneously.

• 26:16Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 26:17Speaker 03

  Why did you try to deceive your audience and make them think I hesitated?

• 26:21Bobby Lee?

  Because in editing, we're gonna leave a gap.

• 26:26Bobby Lee?

  A five second gap. Anyway, um, I'm kidding, don't do that, but um.

• 26:30Speaker 03

  I wouldn't mind if you left a five second gap. If there's one thing I know, girls like a stupid guy. And so if you can make me look stupid.

• 26:39Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 26:39Speaker 03

  That's gonna work for me, even though I do have a degree from DeVry.

• 26:42Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, that's right. So, um.

• 26:44Speaker 03

  Go ahead.

• 26:44Bobby Lee?

  So if you, like, if you have a, um, a black person, a brown person.

• 26:49Speaker 03

  Right.

• 26:49Bobby Lee?

  So you have the, uh, anus.

• 26:53Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 26:53Bobby Lee?

  Anupals.

• 26:55Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 26:55Bobby Lee?

  Right? And if you, oh, the tube itself, right?

• 26:58Speaker 03

  Right.

• 26:58Bobby Lee?

  No matter what race, color, the person is, it's always pink. Why is that?

• 27:04Speaker 03

  Well.

• 27:09Speaker 03

  An easy question. Do you want to hear it or not?

• 27:11Bobby Lee?

  Does this seem like an easy question, Khalyla?

• 27:13Speaker 03

  For someone who studied the anus at DeVry, it's an easy question.

• 27:17Bobby Lee?

  Why don't you say anything?

• 27:18Speaker 02

  Well, no, like, he's the professional from DeVry. I want to hear it.

• 27:21Bobby Lee?

  But do you, I know, but do you agree with what he's saying so far?

• 27:24Speaker 02

  Yeah, everything.

• 27:25Bobby Lee?

  Okay, good. Why aren't you writing it down like I have?

• 27:26Speaker 02

  I have been.

• 27:27Bobby Lee?

  Okay, or you guys are joint writing it down. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Alright, so.

• 27:31Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 27:32Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 27:32Speaker 03

  So, as you.

• 27:34Bobby Lee?

  What?

• 27:34Speaker 04

  Is this gonna be on the test?

• 27:36Speaker 03

  There's no test.

• 27:37Bobby Lee?

  There's no test. Yeah, yeah.

• 27:38Speaker 03

  Okay. If you wanna write and, you know.

• 27:40Bobby Lee?

  And learn.

• 27:40Speaker 03

  Wreck your wrist and eventually have horrible arthritis, that's on you. As Darwin told us, as.

• 27:48Bobby Lee?

  Who's Darwin?

• 27:49Speaker 03

  Charles Darwin.

• 27:50Bobby Lee?

  Oh.

• 27:51Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 27:51Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 27:52Speaker 03

  As evolution tells us.

• 27:54Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 27:54Speaker 03

  Uh, we evolved from the great apes. Uh.

• 27:59Bobby Lee?

  Did we really?

• 28:00Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 28:00Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 28:01Speaker 03

  Yeah, the gorilla, the chimpanzee.

• 28:04Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. What about the orangutan?

• 28:06Speaker 03

  The orangutan.

• 28:07Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, spider monkeys?

• 28:08Speaker 03

  But also.

• 28:08Bobby Lee?

  Spider monkeys?

• 28:09Speaker 03

  Monkeys and apes are two different things.

• 28:11Bobby Lee?

  Well, explain the two.

• 28:12Speaker 03

  But apes are primates.

• 28:15Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 28:16Speaker 03

  And they have a different DNA. They have their chromosomes are closer to ours than, and chimpanzees chromosomes are closer to us than any other mammal.

• 28:25Bobby Lee?

  I can't wait for this connection.

• 28:29Speaker 03

  But the less- No, wait, what I can't wait for? Look, you want a noose answers? No, but I cannot wait to see, okay, so yes, I- So the lesser apes or the monkeys, as you alluded to- Yes, I did allude to- If you're like me, when you were a boy, your father took you to the zoo. On the other side of the wall were tribes of mandrills, were tribes of baboons. Yes. When you're a boy, you would see the male, the leader of the pack, stand up and display posture. All of us as children, even you wagon wheel tits.

• 29:12Speaker 03

  We all thought that those monkeys had bubble gum asses. They were big, they were big, pink asses with an anus right in the middle. Right. All of us as children- And then Nupils. Yes. Yes, yes, I remember the Nupils, yeah. All of us as children, we dove over the wall and bit one of those in the ass and started to chew. Daddy had to come and rescue us. No, we didn't. Well, I did. I know you did, but nobody else did that. But as- You ever jump over the one and chew on one of those? But look at the massive, look at the real estate. Look at the size of the anus. That's what we call Ikea noose. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. It's like furniture.

• 29:57Speaker 03

  It's Ikea noose. So as we evolved from the great apes and the monkeys, as we stood erect while they stayed on our floors, our anus receded- Yeah. Into our anal passage. Our body. Right, and the pink remained, but outside we stayed. Whoa. Well, if you want answers. No, no, I love the answer, I know, I- Okay, well- I think my viewers, our viewers, would love to learn about this, this is something new, I've never knew that. Oh, they're learning all right. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, they are learning, and, and, but you know, you would think that, what?

• 30:33Speaker 03

  So as we evolved, the A-News on humans sucked in. We retained the pink that you see there.

• 30:40Bobby Lee?

  I see.

• 30:41Speaker 03

  But it went inward.

• 30:42Bobby Lee?

  Yes, through evolution and went into.

• 30:44Speaker 03

  Whereas the great apes, they haven't evolved.

• 30:47Bobby Lee?

  They haven't evolved.

• 30:47Speaker 03

  They still walk around like double bubble.

• 30:50Speaker 00

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• 31:33Speaker 00

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• 31:49Bobby Lee?

  Airs?

• 31:49Speaker 03

  Huh?

• 31:50Bobby Lee?

  Hello?

• 31:51Speaker 03

  Well, you don't have to look in. It's already on the outside. If they evolved, it would suck in.

• 31:56Bobby Lee?

  I still have to look in.

• 31:57Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 31:58Bobby Lee?

  If I were to look, if I were to look into that, what would I see?

• 32:02Speaker 03

  Well, yourself.

• 32:05Speaker 04

  Question, professor.

• 32:06Bobby Lee?

  Yes, yes, Peter. Part of one.

• 32:10Speaker 04

  You saw these as a young man?

• 32:12Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 32:12Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 32:12Speaker 04

  Young boy?

• 32:13Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 32:15Speaker 04

  Did you ever like, because you bit his butt?

• 32:18Speaker 03

  Oh, I, yeah, I flew over. I thought it was double bubble. Or great beru. Have you ever had great beru or rain blow? And I was over the wall and I was just chewing on that thing and my old man had to come and get me.

• 32:31Speaker 04

  Were, were you ever curious of like, tickle, tickle?

• 32:36Speaker 03

  Well, the closest I got to it, my dad took me, uh, it was called Halloween Monkey Night.

• 32:44Speaker 03

  And I dove over the wall and put a candle in one. And it was.

• 32:50Speaker 03

  Well, if you're gonna laugh.

• 32:53Speaker 03

  You know, I have a degree. I don't.

• 32:56Speaker 03

  I have a degree, guy, in anus.

• 32:59Bobby Lee?

  I don't know what it is. I don't know. You can't be the thing. Oh, God, it makes no sense.

• 33:06Speaker 03

  Well, it doesn't make sense to the layperson. But to a professor of anus.

• 33:11Bobby Lee?

  I don't think there was that house. So what was it that he used to bring you to? The monkey house, what?

• 33:16Speaker 03

  Monkey night.

• 33:20Bobby Lee?

  Oh, the famous Hollywood monkey night. Oh, yeah, I never, I didn't get the opportunity.

• 33:24Speaker 03

  What neighborhood did you grow up in?

• 33:26Bobby Lee?

  I did grow up in Poway, California. We didn't have those.

• 33:28Speaker 03

  What'd you have on Halloween at the zoo?

• 33:30Bobby Lee?

  Oh, it's at the zoo?

• 33:32Speaker 03

  Yeah, monkey night.

• 33:33Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I wouldn't go to the zoo on Halloween.

• 33:35Speaker 03

  Oh, you should've.

• 33:36Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah, I did not know that that was a ritual of the whites.

• 33:38Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 33:39Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 33:39Speaker 03

  The whites?

• 33:42Speaker 03

  What's that mean?

• 33:44Bobby Lee?

  You're white.

• 33:46Speaker 03

  Am I, though?

• 33:47Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 33:48Speaker 03

  I feel like I'm light pink.

• 33:51Bobby Lee?

  Oh, here we go.

• 33:52Speaker 03

  I don't like the colors.

• 33:54Bobby Lee?

  I don't like the colors as well.

• 33:56Speaker 03

  Like, black people to me are brown or bronze. They're not black.

• 34:00Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I'm not that yellow.

• 34:01Speaker 03

  Like, this is black. Have you ever seen an African American who looks like that? Like that black? I don't think so.

• 34:09Bobby Lee?

  Actually, I have.

• 34:11Speaker 03

  Where?

• 34:12Bobby Lee?

  What?

• 34:12Speaker 03

  Yeah, you have it.

• 34:13Bobby Lee?

  Yes, I have.

• 34:15Speaker 03

  Where?

• 34:16Bobby Lee?

  Where?

• 34:16Speaker 03

  I gotta hear this story.

• 34:19Bobby Lee?

  In space.

• 34:21Speaker 03

  In space, you saw a black guy that was this black?

• 34:24Bobby Lee?

  Yes, dude. I was an astronaut in 1978.

• 34:28Speaker 03

  If you're an astronaut, I'm an anus doctor.

• 34:32Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 34:33Speaker 02

  Wait, I have another question, professor.

• 34:35Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 34:36Speaker 02

  My friend. My friend Bobby is getting a colonoscopy on Wednesday.

• 34:42Speaker 03

  Wow.

• 34:42Speaker 02

  Any tips you can give him?

• 34:44Bobby Lee?

  Any tips you can give me?

• 34:45Speaker 03

  Yeah, I would say bye.

• 34:51Speaker 03

  I would go to the, I would go to the nearest Barnes and Noble or a Chapters. I would buy-

• 34:56Bobby Lee?

  What's a Chapters?

• 34:57Speaker 03

  It's a bookstore.

• 34:58Bobby Lee?

  Okay, okay.

• 34:59Speaker 03

  Any bookstore you want.

• 35:00Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 35:01Speaker 03

  I would go to the English language section. I would-

• 35:04Bobby Lee?

  Why, why, why?

• 35:05Speaker 03

  I would buy-

• 35:06Bobby Lee?

  I don't know Mandarin, Chinese, or Korean.

• 35:08Speaker 03

  Well, let me, can I finish? The professor's talking, garlic bread teeth. Or whatever they call you. I don't know what they call you down at the spa.

• 35:16Bobby Lee?

  Well, you didn't have to call me that.

• 35:17Speaker 03

  Well, what do they call you at the spa?

• 35:19Bobby Lee?

  Jimmy Small Eyes.

• 35:20Speaker 03

  I'd call you garlic bread teeth.

• 35:22Bobby Lee?

  Okay, go ahead.

• 35:24Speaker 03

  So I would, if you're going in for a colonoscopy, get to the nearest bookstore ASAP.

• 35:28Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 35:29Speaker 03

  Find the English language section.

• 35:31Bobby Lee?

  I think it's mostly English language, but anyway, let's move on.

• 35:34Speaker 03

  Okay, but they have specific, you know, they have science fiction, literature-

• 35:38Bobby Lee?

  I understand, so there's genres, there's genres.

• 35:40Speaker 03

  Right, so go to the English language section if you're getting a colonoscopy.

• 35:44Bobby Lee?

  Why wouldn't I go to the science section?

• 35:45Speaker 03

  If you'll let the professor finish, go again.

• 35:50Speaker 03

  Go and get four or five grammar books, okay? Rip the pages out and eat them raw, or put, or put them in hot water, add a little salt, some bouillon.

• 36:03Speaker 03

  Some sliced onion, and make a nice grammar soup, and drink it, and you'll have so many colons inside you. It will-

• 36:17Speaker 03

  Alright.

• 36:20Speaker 03

  You're gonna laugh. After the colonoscopy.

• 36:23Speaker 02

  Clever.

• 36:24Bobby Lee?

  Fucking guy over here, this guy, motherfucker, this guy's so fucking funny, this guy. Holy shit, you really tickle my bones. You tickle my bones.

• 36:32Speaker 03

  Well, you, you did ask, in fairness. You did ask, Khalyla.

• 36:36Bobby Lee?

  You know, cause-

• 36:37Speaker 02

  Colon, semicolon, yes.

• 36:39Speaker 03

  Well, semicolon if you're only getting half of it done.

• 36:42Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, very good, that's your advice.

• 36:45Speaker 03

  Well, yeah, that's my scientific advice. You asked, you did ask.

• 36:49Bobby Lee?

  Doctor, you know so much.

• 36:50Speaker 03

  I know you wanted to do a comedy podcast, but I didn't realize we cast the aid in-

• 36:56Bobby Lee?

  Diary of the CEO, or, you know, I mean, something that you would learn, something-

• 36:59Speaker 03

  It's okay, I don't mind, I, I can flow, I can, I can jive, I can shock, I can, I'm grateful.

• 37:05Bobby Lee?

  I can boogaloo.

• 37:07Speaker 03

  I can boogaloo. I can do this.

• 37:09Bobby Lee?

  What, what am I doing here?

• 37:11Speaker 03

  You're looking in my brain?

• 37:13Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, you know it, you felt it.

• 37:14Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 37:15Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 37:15Speaker 03

  I feel it. Yeah.

• 37:17Bobby Lee?

  Yep.

• 37:17Speaker 03

  Me and you feel each other.

• 37:19Bobby Lee?

  Feel each other.

• 37:20Speaker 03

  Lot of times, we don't have to talk, we just feel each other.

• 37:23Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. So, Doctor, that was your major was, uh, the anus.

• 37:27Speaker 03

  A anus.

• 37:28Bobby Lee?

  What was your minor at DeVry?

• 37:30Speaker 03

  Well, oh, boy. Do we wanna go there?

• 37:34Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I do, I do, because I think it's interesting. I think the fans would like to know, because it's a very important... Let me just say something before you answer. It's a very important, uh, topic. I think that, um, it is something that every, not just America, human beings should know, memorize, maybe study themselves, because it's very, very important. And your minor was what?

• 37:56Speaker 03

  Clitoris.

• 37:57Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 38:00Bobby Lee?

  Yes. Memorize. It's very important.

• 38:04Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 38:04Bobby Lee?

  And, and there's the mysteries of the clitoris.

• 38:06Speaker 03

  Well, not to me, I studied it.

• 38:08Bobby Lee?

  I, I, I know, but, I know, but T, T.

• 38:13Bobby Lee?

  I'm so, I'm sorry. But for me, it's like, you know, you know how, when you go into the Mariana trenches, you go real deep?

• 38:19Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 38:20Bobby Lee?

  And you see those illuminating fishes?

• 38:22Speaker 03

  I'm sorry, before you go any further, because I know what you meant by what you just said, they don't.

• 38:29Bobby Lee?

  I know they don't.

• 38:30Speaker 03

  If you could tell them what the Mariana trench is.

• 38:32Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 38:33Speaker 03

  Just to set the table, because they don't.

• 38:35Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 38:35Speaker 03

  Your viewers, them.

• 38:37Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, but also...

• 38:38Speaker 03

  The dementoids watching from the shadows of their beady, glistening koala eyes.

• 38:43Bobby Lee?

  The netherworld, is what you're saying?

• 38:44Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 38:45Bobby Lee?

  And Baal, the demon.

• 38:47Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 38:47Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. Good sound effect.

• 38:49Speaker 03

  Thank you.

• 38:49Bobby Lee?

  Are you Pablo Francisco? Yeah. Uh, uh, say that thing again, what you just said?

• 38:54Speaker 03

  Okay, so could you tell them, because they don't know what the Mariana trench is?

• 38:58Bobby Lee?

  Here's the miracle, I don't know.

• 39:01Speaker 03

  Okay, tell me to tell you?

• 39:02Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, tell me, yeah, yeah.

• 39:03Speaker 03

  So, the Mariana trench, the Mariana trench is the deepest place on earth, where you can go and get spaghetti sauce on your meatballs. And the Marinara Trent, what?

• 39:17Speaker 03

  If you're gonna ask shit and then just...

• 39:19Bobby Lee?

  That's not what I meant. I know that restaurant. It's really good.

• 39:23Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 39:23Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. Maria's Trench is very good.

• 39:25Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 39:25Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, but I was talking about the Mariana Trench.

• 39:28Speaker 03

  Mariana.

• 39:28Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, the ocean. It's the deepest part of the ocean.

• 39:31Speaker 03

  Right.

• 39:31Bobby Lee?

  And there's like this illuminating, you know what I mean, fish down there.

• 39:34Speaker 03

  There's squid and there's fish that are luminous.

• 39:37Bobby Lee?

  And to me, the clitoris scares me in that way. It's a mystery. Yes, you have one.

• 39:41Speaker 02

  Professor, um, I have a question about the, um, the clitoris.

• 39:46Speaker 03

  They always do.

• 39:48Speaker 02

  Um, why...

• 39:49Bobby Lee?

  Well, hello.

• 39:50Speaker 02

  Why, why don't men know where it is?

• 39:55Speaker 03

  Good question.

• 39:56Bobby Lee?

  Philosophical question.

• 39:57Speaker 03

  Good question.

• 39:58Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, that's a question that Descartes would ask.

• 40:00Speaker 03

  Who?

• 40:01Bobby Lee?

  Descartes.

• 40:02Speaker 03

  Isn't that French for shopping cart?

• 40:05Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 40:08Speaker 03

  Uh, here's why.

• 40:13Speaker 02

  Why can't they ever find it?

• 40:15Speaker 03

  Picture, are you a dog person?

• 40:18Speaker 02

  I am.

• 40:19Speaker 03

  Picture one of the most awkward breeds in the whole lineage of Dachshund.

• 40:28Speaker 02

  Okay, yeah.

• 40:29Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 40:29Speaker 03

  What would you say is one of the most awkward breeds of Dachshund?

• 40:35Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. Is that how you pronounce it, Doctor?

• 40:37Speaker 03

  Yeah, that's how...

• 40:38Bobby Lee?

  Dachshund.

• 40:39Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 40:40Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 40:40Speaker 03

  Dach, Dachshund.

• 40:41Bobby Lee?

  Dachshund.

• 40:42Speaker 03

  That's the German subsequent of the refraction of the militant.

• 40:49Speaker 03

  Now, what would you say is one of the most awkward breeds? And I'm trying to, you know, draw a parallel here so, so the layperson can understand.

• 40:56Bobby Lee?

  I'm with you.

• 40:57Speaker 02

  Awkward looking dog that I've ever seen, but I think they're really cute, are the, um, Mexican hairless dogs. Can you bring that up, Gilbert?

• 41:06Speaker 03

  Hmm, interesting. The exact opposite of what I'm trying to think. Because hairless represents complete visual freedom. You can see everything with a hairless. So with that breed, it almost is a clit.

• 41:23Bobby Lee?

  I see, I see, I see.

• 41:24Speaker 02

  Okay, so.

• 41:25Speaker 03

  It's almost a frisbee catching clit.

• 41:27Bobby Lee?

  So, wha- what we'd like to do is find the hairiest dog.

• 41:30Speaker 03

  Well, you're sort of in it, but with this one, you're, you're, you're, that's a paw shaking clit right there.

• 41:36Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's go to the dachshund. You wanna go dachshund?

• 41:41Speaker 03

  Hmm.

• 41:42Bobby Lee?

  Where would you like to go?

• 41:43Speaker 03

  It's not hairiest, I'm talking about one of the most awkward. Think about the anatomy of, as the French say, le clout.

• 41:53Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, le clout. Yeah.

• 41:55Speaker 03

  Okay, that's, uh...

• 41:57Bobby Lee?

  Are we working here or what?

• 41:58Speaker 03

  Hmm, that's interesting.

• 41:59Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 42:00Speaker 03

  It's not what I'm looking for.

• 42:01Bobby Lee?

  What would you call that? 1960s, uh, hate Ashbury clit.

• 42:07Speaker 03

  Oh, oh, this one?

• 42:08Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 42:09Speaker 03

  Uh, yeah, this is probably, yeah, that's like hippie clit, for sure.

• 42:14Bobby Lee?

  That's hippie clit, for sure, yeah, yeah, yeah. Can we find, uh, something in our generation, or in the 2000s, please? Such as? Beethoven. Oh, here we go.

• 42:24Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 42:25Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, that's, we're going farther back.

• 42:26Speaker 03

  You're a little closer.

• 42:28Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, this is Jane gets, no, I think this is Jane gets con clit.

• 42:30Speaker 03

  It starts with S H, I mean, if you wanna play this.

• 42:33Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, let's go, let's go, let's, forget the dog references, I think we're losing it.

• 42:36Speaker 03

  No, I can tell you. The Shar Pei, can we bring up the Shar Pei?

• 42:40Bobby Lee?

  The Shar Pei, let's go to the Shar Pei.

• 42:42Speaker 02

  I love a Shar Pei, but, okay, never mind.

• 42:44Bobby Lee?

  Just, please don't question the dog.

• 42:45Speaker 03

  Take a look at the Shar Pei.

• 42:47Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 42:48Speaker 03

  And, oh, that's a Shar Pei.

• 42:50Bobby Lee?

  Oh. Okay, is that the Shar Pei?

• 42:52Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 42:53Speaker 03

  Yes, if we could see a full body shot of it, please.

• 42:55Bobby Lee?

  Full body shot, please.

• 42:56Speaker 03

  A full body shot of a Shar Pei.

• 42:58Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, I gotta fire my, uh... Sorry, is the crazy? Is, is that a Shar Pei?

• 43:02Speaker 03

  Yeah, that's not the best specimen, but if you look at the...

• 43:05Bobby Lee?

  Get me a better specimen, please.

• 43:06Speaker 03

  The extreme Shar Pei.

• 43:07Bobby Lee?

  Give me an extreme Shar Pei, please.

• 43:08Speaker 03

  They're crawling with flaps, there we go.

• 43:11Bobby Lee?

  Oh, there we go, here we go.

• 43:12Speaker 03

  Now, try and find a clit on that whore, on that puppy.

• 43:17Bobby Lee?

  On that whore.

• 43:19Speaker 06

  Oh, that whore.

• 43:20Bobby Lee?

  She is a whore.

• 43:21Speaker 03

  And this is the mystery. This is the mystery of the vulva.

• 43:26Bobby Lee?

  I get it. I get it now.

• 43:28Speaker 03

  There are so many, that's like a can of Pringles that spilled out in the back of a John Deere truck.

• 43:33Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I fully understand that.

• 43:35Speaker 03

  And look, it just.

• 43:36Bobby Lee?

  There we go. Yes, yes.

• 43:36Speaker 03

  And that's the easiest way I can put it. I mean, just try.

• 43:41Bobby Lee?

  It's like an endless ocean of.

• 43:43Speaker 03

  Flaps.

• 43:43Bobby Lee?

  Of flaps. Yeah, yeah.

• 43:45Speaker 03

  And ridges.

• 43:46Bobby Lee?

  And where do we go? Where do we look?

• 43:48Speaker 03

  Ariana Grande.

• 43:49Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. Where do we look? Where do we look?

• 43:51Speaker 03

  Good luck.

• 43:51Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, good luck.

• 43:52Speaker 03

  I don't even know if I'm looking at his asshole now or his face.

• 43:56Bobby Lee?

  Exactly. Wow.

• 43:57Speaker 03

  Yeah, so I hope that that helps.

• 44:00Bobby Lee?

  I hope that clears that up.

• 44:01Speaker 03

  This is what men see. To go to look for the flit.

• 44:05Bobby Lee?

  But specifically, you know, what is the, what is the role of the clitoris?

• 44:17Speaker 04

  Shopify. Shopify. Shopify.

• 44:21Bobby Lee?

  You know, we have an online business. We use Shopify. Do you know why? Starting something is hard. Yeah. Is it not? Totally. Yeah, yeah. Like, you know, I tried to make my own sock once. Sock? And you tried to sell it, right? I tried to sell my own sock, right? So you're a sock? Very difficult, right? Yeah. Right? And it's like, starting your own business, right, is hard. Is it not? It is. And you, when I was doing the sock, where I was like, I wish someone could help me. There was nothing like it. No one can help you. No one could help me, right? So I finished. And now it's just a toe. You finished in the sock? No, just a toe sock, right? But my point is, is that if you're starting an online business, Shopify will help you. Shopify is the commerce platform behind millions of businesses around the world and 10% of all e-commerce in the US from household names like. Skims. Allbirds. Tiger Belly.

• 45:06Bobby Lee?

  To brands just getting started as well. Like your sock business. What was it called? Yeah, socks. Sockitumi. Yeah, yeah. That's a real one. Oh, really? Yeah, Sockitumi is a. Mine was just called Sock. Get started with your own design for you with hundreds of ready-to-use templates. Shopify helps you build a beautiful online store that matches your brand's style.

• 45:25Speaker 02

  Accelerate your efficiency whether you're uploading new products or trying to improve existing ones. Shopify is packed with helpful AI tools that write product descriptions, page headlines, and even enhance your product photography.

• 45:36Bobby Lee?

  Best yet, Shopify is your commerce expert with world-class expertise in everything from managing inventory to international shipping, to processing returns and beyond.

• 45:46Speaker 02

  And Kat, what if people haven't heard about my brand?

• 45:49Speaker 07

  Well, that's okay. Shopify helps you find your customers with easy-to-run email and social media.

• 45:54Speaker 02

  But Kat, what if I get stuck?

• 45:56Speaker 07

  Oh, it's okay. Shopify is always around to share advice with their award-winning 24/7 customer support.

• 46:01Bobby Lee?

  Talk about the purple button, please. And did I mention the iconic purple button?

• 46:06Speaker 00

  So you wanted to bring it?

• 46:07Bobby Lee?

  I wanted to bring it, the Shop Pay button that's used by millions of businesses around the world. It's why Shopify has the best converting checkout on the planet. It also helps boost conversions, meaning less carts, going abandoned, and more sales for you.

• 46:21Speaker 00

  It's time to turn those what-ifs into ch-ch-ching with Shopify today. Sign up for your $1 per month trial at Shopify.com/tigribelly. Go to Shopify.com/tigribelly. That's Shopify.com/tigribelly.

• 46:36Bobby Lee?

  What is the, what is the role of the clitoris?

• 46:41Speaker 03

  The role of the clitoris, it's sort of the miniaturized man penis. It's there to create stimuli. It's there to create sexual arousal. It's there for the woman to have a pleasure center during coitus.

• 46:58Bobby Lee?

  Oh, is that a season or a ritual?

• 47:00Speaker 03

  It's a season.

• 47:01Bobby Lee?

  It's a season?

• 47:03Speaker 03

  It's that two-week window when spring's just turning into winter.

• 47:07Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I wear a funny hat that two weeks, right? I do the dance.

• 47:11Speaker 03

  It almost fall, but it's not quite.

• 47:13Bobby Lee?

  The coitus festival, yeah, yeah, yeah. There's one 40 miles of Alhambra. There's a beautiful coitus festival.

• 47:20Speaker 03

  By the way.

• 47:21Bobby Lee?

  We wear the dresses, the white hats, and we do the dance.

• 47:24Speaker 03

  The coitus.

• 47:25Bobby Lee?

  You want to do the dance?

• 47:25Speaker 03

  Let's do the coitus.

• 47:26Bobby Lee?

  Coitus dance, here we go. I don't know if you remember, but yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You start again?

• 47:37Bobby Lee?

  Okay, well that was it, that's pretty much it, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 47:39Speaker 03

  Wow, I think I just threw my ass out.

• 47:41Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But if you go to the Coitus Festival, uh, it's beautiful.

• 47:47Speaker 03

  Well, also, I mentioned earlier-

• 47:48Bobby Lee?

  I don't know why you and I are the only one people there. But, you know-

• 47:52Speaker 03

  Who cares?

• 47:53Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, who cares?

• 47:53Speaker 03

  We do things our way, but I might add that, um, I mentioned earlier I walked sideways like a horseshoe crab after the European Wax Center earlier.

• 48:04Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 48:04Speaker 03

  The Coitus Festival, I walked in a zigzag for four weeks. Because that's intense. Sorry, what was your question?

• 48:14Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, what was your- That was a question. Now, my question was, what, the role was, and you answered it perfectly.

• 48:18Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 48:19Bobby Lee?

  It's a pleasure center.

• 48:20Speaker 03

  It's a, it's a pleasure center for women.

• 48:23Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, go pee.

• 48:23Speaker 04

  I'm gonna find the clitoris, eh, professor.

• 48:26Speaker 03

  Whoa.

• 48:26Bobby Lee?

  Whoa.

• 48:27Speaker 02

  What?

• 48:28Speaker 04

  Okay, wrong timing.

• 48:30Speaker 02

  He literally had to write to me, "I gotta pee." And I wrote back, "Go pee."

• 48:36Speaker 03

  That's code for loaf, you know that, right?

• 48:38Bobby Lee?

  I know, I know that, eh.

• 48:38Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 48:39Speaker 03

  Like, anyone could hold a pee.

• 48:41Bobby Lee?

  Oh.

• 48:41Speaker 03

  Like, you could be comfortable and hold a pee, but when you're holding a loaf, nah, he's-

• 48:47Bobby Lee?

  Also, um, and people don't know this, that, so he has a major in, um, uh, the anal, anus.

• 48:53Speaker 03

  Anus.

• 48:54Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I mean, he has a minor in clitoris.

• 48:56Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 48:57Bobby Lee?

  Right? But he also, before, you would, you wanted to be a zoologist, because you talk about animals all the time.

• 49:03Speaker 03

  Ethology, the study of fish.

• 49:04Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 49:05Speaker 03

  Zoologist, marine biologist.

• 49:07Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. He loves marine biology.

• 49:10Speaker 03

  Yeah, I didn't think-

• 49:11Bobby Lee?

  And it involves Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. And he's involved as well. That's what, that's what they call it, Kareem, you know? But anyway, um-

• 49:19Speaker 03

  Happy, happy to answer your question.

• 49:21Bobby Lee?

  I'm happy to be here, yeah, yeah, so he was a zoologist, and if people don't know this, um, but Dr. Williams, may I call you that?

• 49:28Speaker 03

  Professor.

• 49:29Bobby Lee?

  Professor Williams, yeah. Um, has discovered six species.

• 49:34Speaker 02

  Oh.

• 49:35Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, two in the ocean- Two on land.

• 49:38Speaker 03

  Mm-hmm.

• 49:38Bobby Lee?

  One in the air and one in the unknown. Would you like to talk about all of them or the only specific ones?

• 49:43Speaker 03

  If you wanna pick, uh, you pick the category, I'm open to talking to all or one or three, whatever you want.

• 49:50Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, well, uh, what is the rarest sea animal that you discovered that was in the ocean? And what part of the ocean and the description of this animal, please?

• 49:57Speaker 03

  Okay, so there's a subspecies of the anglerfish. Are you familiar with?

• 50:01Bobby Lee?

  I love the anglerfish.

• 50:03Speaker 03

  You're familiar with it?

• 50:04Bobby Lee?

  We just said we loved it.

• 50:05Speaker 03

  But I have a feeling you're patron, I think you're pa, you're PPing me, patronizing the professor.

• 50:10Bobby Lee?

  Pull up an anglerfish, please?

• 50:11Speaker 03

  Wait, wait, don't pull it up.

• 50:13Speaker 02

  Don't pull it up.

• 50:14Speaker 03

  Why don't you tell us what it looks like, uh?

• 50:16Speaker 02

  Oh, and tell, Bobby.

• 50:17Speaker 03

  Larry, Larry lullaby eyes.

• 50:20Speaker 02

  And Bobby, tell us, tell us.

• 50:22Bobby Lee?

  And anglerfish has antennas that go, oh, big.

• 50:24Speaker 02

  Okay, and tell us what happens with the male and the female.

• 50:27Bobby Lee?

  What?

• 50:27Speaker 02

  There's something very specific that happens.

• 50:29Bobby Lee?

  Wait, those angle, those things, right?

• 50:32Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 50:32Bobby Lee?

  Are their eyeballs?

• 50:33Speaker 02

  Oh, no.

• 50:34Bobby Lee?

  Yep, doctor?

• 50:36Speaker 03

  It's not the eyeballs.

• 50:37Bobby Lee?

  It's their anus?

• 50:38Speaker 02

  It's their light bulb.

• 50:39Bobby Lee?

  It's their light bulb. But do they not have a thing, one thing?

• 50:42Speaker 03

  One.

• 50:42Bobby Lee?

  Coming out, right? And it's got a light at the end of it, right? But I don't know how they fuck. The anglerfish we're familiar with, but you discovered a?

• 50:51Speaker 02

  Different species.

• 50:52Speaker 03

  Yes, this is called, and it blends into my other research, it's the anuel fish. And, and what it does, it, the ang, the anglerfish has a, a prescive that comes out.

• 51:04Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 51:05Speaker 03

  And it, it uses it as a fishing lure.

• 51:08Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah, wow. It's tricky.

• 51:10Speaker 03

  Well, it tricks fish. And they're really deep.

• 51:14Bobby Lee?

  They're deep.

• 51:15Speaker 03

  Really deep down in that thing you were talking about.

• 51:17Bobby Lee?

  But why is it different than the angler?

• 51:18Speaker 03

  Because this one, instead of coming out of its forehead, it has a extension coming out of its agnos.

• 51:27Bobby Lee?

  I see.

• 51:28Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 51:29Bobby Lee?

  And, and another bulb?

• 51:31Speaker 03

  Yeah, it has a lure and instead of eating fish on the front end.

• 51:34Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 51:35Speaker 03

  This one lures fish in and it shits in their faces.

• 51:40Bobby Lee?

  Why?

• 51:41Speaker 03

  Well, I don't know. That's, that's mother, what am I, mother nature?

• 51:44Bobby Lee?

  I know, but you're the one that-

• 51:45Speaker 03

  I just study it.

• 51:46Bobby Lee?

  I know, but that's all you gathered from all your-

• 51:50Speaker 03

  Well, some animals are just, they're about vengeance, like the hyena and the African lion.

• 51:56Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 51:57Speaker 03

  They have a very antagonistic relationship where the lion, who is a apex predator, will kill a hyena but not eat it.

• 52:07Bobby Lee?

  Ah.

• 52:07Speaker 03

  He will just kill it because it's competition.

• 52:10Bobby Lee?

  It's competition.

• 52:11Speaker 03

  So the anguular fish-

• 52:12Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 52:13Speaker 03

  It's in a very, very limited space where there's very limited food way down in the depth.

• 52:19Bobby Lee?

  But there's a lot of, no one's around though.

• 52:21Speaker 03

  There's other fish, but it doesn't need the competition, so it lures them in, shits in their faces, off they go.

• 52:28Bobby Lee?

  My argument would be, my argument would be, if you go that deep into the ocean, literally, fish will, probably go through a day without even seeing another fish.

• 52:38Speaker 03

  Right.

• 52:39Bobby Lee?

  There's a lot of space.

• 52:40Speaker 03

  Right.

• 52:40Bobby Lee?

  Why would it shit in his own face? Or shit in somebody else's face?

• 52:44Speaker 03

  Because it doesn't want the competition.

• 52:46Bobby Lee?

  There's not a lot of competition down there.

• 52:48Speaker 03

  But anything's competition down there.

• 52:50Bobby Lee?

  Oh, I see. Let's talk about, let's talk about the, uh, the air animal that you, uh, that you discovered.

• 52:58Speaker 03

  Oh, the air animal, okay.

• 52:59Bobby Lee?

  What's it called again?

• 53:00Speaker 03

  Well, it's a subs- it's a subspecies of the osprey, which is a-

• 53:06Bobby Lee?

  What is osprey?

• 53:07Speaker 02

  I love osprey.

• 53:07Bobby Lee?

  Tell me what an osprey is.

• 53:09Speaker 02

  Well, they're very, very-

• 53:11Bobby Lee?

  Describe them.

• 53:12Speaker 02

  They're seabirds.

• 53:13Speaker 03

  They're raptors, they're flying predators with very elongated talons.

• 53:18Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 53:18Speaker 03

  And they're diving prey birds. They dive into, they smash themselves into the water and pull up fish.

• 53:25Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 53:26Speaker 03

  And there's a subspecies-

• 53:30Speaker 04

  Kind of like a shoe bill, right?

• 53:31Speaker 03

  Pardon you?

• 53:32Speaker 04

  Like a shoe bill?

• 53:34Speaker 03

  A shoe bill? No, that's a completely different. A shoe bill is more of a, a beach land wandering bird. With a shoe that looks like a horse.

• 53:45Bobby Lee?

  You don't have to answer.

• 53:46Speaker 04

  Well, it's a question, right?

• 53:48Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 53:48Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 53:49Speaker 03

  There's your osprey. Boom.

• 53:52Bobby Lee?

  Boom.

• 53:52Speaker 04

  Boom.

• 53:53Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 53:54Speaker 03

  So, this is a very specialized way of hunting that most birds can't do this.

• 54:00Bobby Lee?

  It's incredible.

• 54:01Speaker 03

  And their success rate is great, and they sort of have the market on fish.

• 54:07Bobby Lee?

  Wait, yeah, so push pause.

• 54:09Speaker 03

  And so what happened is there's a subspecies called the bugle crow.

• 54:16Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 54:17Speaker 03

  And basically, these crows have adapted and evolved. They go to 7-Eleven dumpsters.

• 54:23Bobby Lee?

  Oh.

• 54:24Speaker 03

  They pull out bugles.

• 54:25Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 54:26Speaker 03

  Put them on their feet, and, and now they've got the talons of a osprey. And wham, they're going in, and this is...

• 54:38Speaker 03

  Boy, oh boy. It's like you're mocking me.

• 54:41Speaker 04

  You were.

• 54:44Speaker 04

  It makes perfect sense.

• 54:44Speaker 03

  Well, they just want to eat, guy.

• 54:46Bobby Lee?

  I know, guy, but...

• 54:47Speaker 03

  Guy.

• 54:48Bobby Lee?

  They go to the dumpster and they...

• 54:50Speaker 03

  Well, yeah.

• 54:50Bobby Lee?

  Every finger.

• 54:52Speaker 03

  Yeah, on every claw, they put a bugle.

• 54:54Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 54:55Speaker 03

  And now they got bigger talons than a osprey.

• 54:57Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 54:58Speaker 03

  They're not missing.

• 54:59Bobby Lee?

  What's a bugle?

• 55:00Speaker 02

  The ones with the...

• 55:01Speaker 03

  Pull up bugle, for god's sake.

• 55:03Speaker 02

  The triangular pointed...

• 55:05Speaker 03

  Pull up...

• 55:05Speaker 04

  The chips.

• 55:06Speaker 02

  The chips.

• 55:06Bobby Lee?

  Oh!

• 55:07Speaker 03

  Pull up the bugle. Not the bag, the actual thing. Show, show the bugle.

• 55:11Bobby Lee?

  I've eaten the bugles at the airport before, yeah.

• 55:13Speaker 03

  Show, show the bugle.

• 55:15Bobby Lee?

  Oh, that's what...

• 55:16Speaker 03

  Show the bugle.

• 55:17Bobby Lee?

  My argument, yeah, yeah.

• 55:18Speaker 03

  Yeah. Show the bugle.

• 55:19Bobby Lee?

  All right. But, but here, here's my argument against that.

• 55:22Speaker 03

  Show the bugle.

• 55:23Bobby Lee?

  Okay, yeah, yeah.

• 55:25Bobby Lee?

  My argument against that, and I'm sorry for being, uh...

• 55:28Speaker 03

  No worries.

• 55:29Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is that wouldn't the bugle just snap when it, you know, I mean, goes into the wa... First of all, does it go into the water? I don't...

• 55:39Speaker 03

  And you thought I was lying. I got you professor.

• 55:43Bobby Lee?

  Does it go into the water?

• 55:44Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 55:45Bobby Lee?

  Doesn't the bugle get wet and it just becomes like, I mean, too moist for the talons to go into the skin of the fish?

• 55:51Speaker 03

  Have you ever punched a fish?

• 55:54Bobby Lee?

  No, I've never have.

• 55:55Speaker 03

  Okay, they're not brick. They're meat, they're soft.

• 55:59Bobby Lee?

  I understand that.

• 55:59Speaker 03

  You go in at 70 miles an hour with 10 bugles. You're going through a tuna like Holly Parton goes through a lemon meringue pie on a Friday night and she's already got diarrhea.

• 56:13Bobby Lee?

  Does flavor count?

• 56:14Speaker 03

  What do you mean?

• 56:15Bobby Lee?

  The bugle flavors.

• 56:16Speaker 03

  You could have, you could have ranch.

• 56:17Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 56:18Speaker 03

  You could have sour cream and onion.

• 56:19Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 56:20Speaker 03

  It's how you like your fish seasoned.

• 56:24Bobby Lee?

  I see. They pre-season it with the claws.

• 56:27Speaker 03

  Well, yeah, if you've got a sour cream and onion bugle.

• 56:29Bobby Lee?

  That's so brilliant.

• 56:30Speaker 03

  And you penetrate that soft flesh of a fish.

• 56:33Bobby Lee?

  It's like eating sour cream.

• 56:34Speaker 03

  It's gonna permeate throughout the fish. You're gonna have a nice onion, um.

• 56:37Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, or barbecue.

• 56:39Speaker 03

  Yeah, barbecue.

• 56:40Bobby Lee?

  Flavor, salmon or whatever.

• 56:41Speaker 03

  Blackened catfish.

• 56:42Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, that's really brilliant. I did not know that.

• 56:46Speaker 03

  Well, this is mother nature. I didn't.

• 56:47Bobby Lee?

  How did you discover it? You were at a 7-Eleven?

• 56:49Speaker 03

  Oh, I studied.

• 56:50Bobby Lee?

  Oh.

• 56:51Speaker 03

  I'm not a deviant for God's sake.

• 56:52Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 56:53Speaker 04

  Next to the 7-Eleven.

• 56:54Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 56:57Bobby Lee?

  This last animal I would like to talk about is.

• 57:01Speaker 03

  We did air and we did water.

• 57:03Bobby Lee?

  Should we do land and other?

• 57:04Speaker 03

  Land, sure.

• 57:05Bobby Lee?

  Let's go, but other I really, I love that. I've been reading that book that you wrote.

• 57:09Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 57:11Speaker 03

  The.

• 57:12Bobby Lee?

  So let's talk about the land animal.

• 57:15Speaker 03

  What? It's almost an hour.

• 57:19Bobby Lee?

  I know, but people want to learn.

• 57:21Speaker 03

  People love to learn.

• 57:22Bobby Lee?

  Dude, this is like a diary of CEO. They want to learn about things. Right, Kyla? Yeah, no, I'm locked in. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 57:28Speaker 03

  You are?

• 57:29Bobby Lee?

  Dude, I've learned so much.

• 57:30Speaker 03

  I didn't lose you a clit.

• 57:32Bobby Lee?

  No.

• 57:34Bobby Lee?

  What did we learn today so far? Anus?

• 57:37Speaker 02

  Oh, I can give you a whole...

• 57:39Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 57:39Speaker 02

  You can test me. You can test me on anything and I remembered every single detail.

• 57:43Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, the black crow. Pester. The double angler.

• 57:46Speaker 02

  It's called a bugle crow.

• 57:47Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, bugle, the double angles. There he is, right there in the water. They don't fucking disintegrate.

• 57:54Bobby Lee?

  You have the photo to prove it. Thank you so much.

• 57:57Speaker 03

  And that's a testament to the food we eat today and put in our body.

• 58:01Bobby Lee?

  Because it's, uh, full of chemicals.

• 58:03Speaker 03

  That's a testament to how...

• 58:05Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, not a good thing.

• 58:07Speaker 03

  Well, not to you.

• 58:09Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, but for the black crow. Brilliant.

• 58:11Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 58:12Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, interesting. And so we've learned a lot. So what did we learn today with the Anus, the Kotorai?

• 58:17Speaker 02

  Uh huh.

• 58:17Bobby Lee?

  What else did we learn?

• 58:18Speaker 02

  We do the Anu angler fish in the Marianas Trench.

• 58:21Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 58:22Speaker 02

  Right?

• 58:23Bobby Lee?

  Yes, which is also a restaurant.

• 58:26Speaker 02

  It is?

• 58:27Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, but the spaghetti.

• 58:28Speaker 02

  I didn't know that.

• 58:29Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. The sauce.

• 58:30Speaker 02

  Oh, oh, oh, I thought you meant like in real life. Sorry.

• 58:35Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, in real life.

• 58:37Speaker 02

  I thought that the restaurant was the Marinara Trench, not the Marianas Trench.

• 58:40Speaker 03

  That's right.

• 58:41Bobby Lee?

  Well, sometimes I pronounce like, you know, I say Panora Bread.

• 58:44Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 58:45Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah.

• 58:45Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, so anyway, um...

• 58:47Speaker 03

  By the way, Panera Bread, have you ever gotten their soup bowls that are made out of bread?

• 58:53Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yes.

• 58:53Speaker 03

  I went about a week ago. I got one of these soup bowls with the cream of chicken wild rice.

• 59:00Bobby Lee?

  Was it wild, though?

• 59:01Speaker 03

  It was wild.

• 59:02Bobby Lee?

  Okay, good.

• 59:03Speaker 03

  And they put, they don't put it in a ceramic bowl. They put it in bread and it's about, it's somewhere between a bowling ball and a softball. It's like right in the middle. And I'm driving down Ventura Boulevard the other day. I got one hand on the, you know, the Dodge Neon steering wheel. And I got a bread bowl in the other hand and I see a kid walking his dog. And this kid had braces and zits and...

• 59:30Bobby Lee?

  And I know you don't, that bothers you.

• 59:32Speaker 03

  It bothers me.

• 59:32Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 59:33Speaker 03

  I just, I wanted to eat this soup and I just threw it out the window. Hit the kid in the head.

• 59:39Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 59:39Speaker 03

  And kind of the perfect size with the soup, it lubed it and he had a bread helmet on. And there's no visor in it and he walked right into a wall and got killed.

• 59:49Bobby Lee?

  No.

• 59:50Speaker 03

  And all that for $4.97.

• 59:54Bobby Lee?

  Wow. So you don't need to buy a gun these days. Just go get a Panera Bread Bowl.

• 59:59Speaker 03

  Have fun with soup.

• 1:00:00Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, have fun with soup. Can we go to land animal?

• 1:00:02Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:00:02Bobby Lee?

  So you were in, what country were you in? Cambodia?

• 1:00:06Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:00:06Bobby Lee?

  Were you not?

• 1:00:07Speaker 03

  I've been to Cambodia twice.

• 1:00:09Bobby Lee?

  No, but this land animal that you discovered, was it Cambodia or Vietnam? Was it?

• 1:00:12Speaker 03

  It was Cambodia.

• 1:00:13Bobby Lee?

  On the border, I think, right?

• 1:00:15Speaker 03

  It was on the border.

• 1:00:16Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 1:00:17Speaker 03

  And it's, it was on the border of Vietnam and Cambodia.

• 1:00:21Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 1:00:22Speaker 03

  Which is a tough area. Have you ever been down there?

• 1:00:25Bobby Lee?

  Oh, that's where I party.

• 1:00:26Speaker 03

  Talk to me.

• 1:00:27Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, there's a rave there once a year. It's kind of like the, the, the, there's a Canora event.

• 1:00:34Speaker 03

  What's it called?

• 1:00:35Bobby Lee?

  What? Canora event?

• 1:00:37Speaker 03

  Canora?

• 1:00:37Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, Asia. What's, what's, what's the thing called?

• 1:00:40Speaker 04

  What did he say? I don't know. The Coitus Festival.

• 1:00:42Speaker 03

  The Coitus Festival.

• 1:00:43Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, let me think of that again.

• 1:00:44Speaker 04

  The Canora?

• 1:00:46Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, is the Coitus Festival there? There's a Coitus Festival there.

• 1:00:50Speaker 03

  Oh, why haven't we gone?

• 1:00:52Bobby Lee?

  Well, I didn't, because you always want me to buy your ticket?

• 1:00:55Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:00:55Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. So there's a Coitus Festival there and, um, yeah, so I've been on the border there.

• 1:01:00Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 1:01:01Bobby Lee?

  They love it.

• 1:01:01Speaker 03

  They love, love, love it.

• 1:01:03Bobby Lee?

  Two weeks in the jungles of Vietnam, Cambodia, to the Coitus Festival.

• 1:01:07Speaker 03

  Love.

• 1:01:08Bobby Lee?

  And, you know, we can.

• 1:01:09Speaker 03

  Yeah, do the.

• 1:01:10Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, come stand up, please. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:01:18Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, so.

• 1:01:19Speaker 03

  Wow.

• 1:01:20Bobby Lee?

  Wow. Yeah.

• 1:01:21Speaker 03

  Coitus 26.

• 1:01:23Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:25Bobby Lee?

  What's up?

• 1:01:26Speaker 04

  Oh, she was asking me a question.

• 1:01:27Bobby Lee?

  What was the question?

• 1:01:29Speaker 02

  I didn't ask a question.

• 1:01:31Bobby Lee?

  What was the question?

• 1:01:32Speaker 02

  I literally didn't ask a question. What was my question, Hyman?

• 1:01:35Speaker 04

  Uh, the question you just asked me. Did he just, did Hyman?

• 1:01:39Speaker 02

  That's Hyman scribbled.

• 1:01:40Speaker 04

  Hey, my notes. Hey, I'm not cheating.

• 1:01:42Bobby Lee?

  All right.

• 1:01:42Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 1:01:43Bobby Lee?

  All right, I'm sorry, doctor.

• 1:01:45Speaker 03

  No.

• 1:01:45Speaker 04

  It's a brain teaser.

• 1:01:46Bobby Lee?

  Professor.

• 1:01:46Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:01:47Speaker 02

  It's a what?

• 1:01:48Speaker 04

  It's a brain teaser.

• 1:01:49Speaker 02

  Oh, I see.

• 1:01:50Bobby Lee?

  So you.

• 1:01:51Speaker 04

  I'm sorry, professor.

• 1:01:52Speaker 03

  Don't worry.

• 1:01:52Bobby Lee?

  You weren't at the, the festival, but you were in, why were you in the Vietnam, um, Cambodia border?

• 1:01:57Speaker 03

  We were searching.

• 1:01:59Bobby Lee?

  Who's we?

• 1:02:00Speaker 03

  Well, me and my friends.

• 1:02:02Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 1:02:04Speaker 03

  Up here.

• 1:02:04Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 1:02:06Speaker 03

  Uh, we were searching for a subspecies of the American horny toad. Hmm. Have you heard of these lizards?

• 1:02:18Speaker 02

  I've heard of the horned toad.

• 1:02:19Bobby Lee?

  I've heard of them. Yeah, not familiar, though.

• 1:02:21Speaker 03

  Yeah, the horny toad.

• 1:02:22Bobby Lee?

  And that's the Cotis Festival that we go to.

• 1:02:25Speaker 03

  Yeah, there it is. There it is. Oh, the memory.

• 1:02:27Bobby Lee?

  Oh, the memories at that festival.

• 1:02:29Speaker 03

  Wow, we had a fucking good time.

• 1:02:31Bobby Lee?

  Oh, there's a 2026. Has it happened yet?

• 1:02:33Speaker 04

  Has it?

• 1:02:34Bobby Lee?

  Has it happened yet? 2026? Wait, it already happened.

• 1:02:39Speaker 03

  It happened.

• 1:02:40Bobby Lee?

  We missed it.

• 1:02:40Speaker 03

  We missed it.

• 1:02:41Bobby Lee?

  We missed it this year. Oh, that's unfortunate.

• 1:02:43Speaker 03

  But you know what? Next week, Coitus Chella is happening.

• 1:02:47Bobby Lee?

  Oh, really?

• 1:02:47Speaker 03

  We could go to that.

• 1:02:48Bobby Lee?

  Who's playing?

• 1:02:48Speaker 03

  Ah, a couple of...

• 1:02:52Speaker 08

  Hey, it's Adam Grant from TED's Rethinking Podcast. As businesses scale, success depends on how well knowledge is captured, shared, and kept up to date. Camtasia Pro turns teams' expertise into engaging training, onboarding, and documentation. No professional editing experience required. With the industry's best screen recording, video editing, and AI-powered workflows, you can train faster and boost operational efficiency. Get over $100 off your first year at camtasia pro.com and start building a smarter way to educate customers, onboard employees, and ensure valuable expertise is shared across teams.

• 1:03:27Bobby Lee?

  Let's go to the other animal.

• 1:03:28Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:03:30Speaker 03

  The subspecies.

• 1:03:31Bobby Lee?

  We're still going with the?

• 1:03:33Speaker 03

  Of the horny toad.

• 1:03:34Bobby Lee?

  Oh, we're still gonna go there?

• 1:03:34Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:03:35Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:03:38Speaker 03

  What was that?

• 1:03:39Speaker 04

  Does that sound like the horny toad minks?

• 1:03:41Speaker 03

  Let's hear it.

• 1:03:51Speaker 04

  Right?

• 1:03:53Bobby Lee?

  Is it?

• 1:03:53Speaker 03

  Good, yeah.

• 1:03:54Bobby Lee?

  I've never seen it.

• 1:03:55Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:03:55Speaker 04

  That should do it.

• 1:03:56Speaker 03

  Nice job, guy.

• 1:03:57Speaker 04

  Thank you.

• 1:03:59Bobby Lee?

  So having him, having him spend the night a couple of nights, you've taught him some things.

• 1:04:06Speaker 03

  Maybe.

• 1:04:09Speaker 03

  But the horny toad, I don't know if you know this about the horny toad. You probably know this, Khalyla.

• 1:04:14Speaker 02

  I only know about the horned toad because I picked one up where I've met a couple on my hikes in the desert.

• 1:04:20Speaker 03

  And did you know what their defense mechanism is? We call them the period lizards.

• 1:04:26Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 1:04:27Speaker 03

  They shoot blood out of their eyes.

• 1:04:32Speaker 03

  As a defense mechanism, they literally shoot blood directly, streams of blood.

• 1:04:39Bobby Lee?

  That doesn't seem right.

• 1:04:40Speaker 03

  It doesn't.

• 1:04:40Bobby Lee?

  I've never heard of it.

• 1:04:41Speaker 03

  The period lizard.

• 1:04:42Bobby Lee?

  Honestly, go Google that to see if that is true.

• 1:04:45Speaker 03

  About the horned toad?

• 1:04:46Bobby Lee?

  About the horned toad or the period lizard?

• 1:04:47Speaker 03

  The horny toad.

• 1:04:48Bobby Lee?

  The horny toad.

• 1:04:49Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:04:49Bobby Lee?

  The horny toad's defense mechanism, it shoots blood out of their eyes? I've never heard of that before.

• 1:04:54Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:04:54Bobby Lee?

  Can you really Google it? Don't chat, you mean, don't make it up.

• 1:04:57Speaker 03

  The way a skunk shoots ass sauce out of its ass.

• 1:05:00Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:02Bobby Lee?

  You're absolutely correct. You're absolutely correct. It shoots blood, yeah. What kind of blood is it?

• 1:05:07Speaker 03

  Well, we call them, adoringly, we call them the period lizard.

• 1:05:12Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, but how do you know it's that blood?

• 1:05:14Speaker 03

  Well, they can only defend themselves once a month.

• 1:05:20Bobby Lee?

  I see. That's why you call it.

• 1:05:22Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:05:22Bobby Lee?

  So that's what a horny toad does.

• 1:05:25Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:05:26Bobby Lee?

  And you discovered in the, in the borders of Vietnam and Cambodia, what?

• 1:05:29Speaker 03

  We discovered a subspecies called the tampecks lizard. And we brought the two together and they're almost inseparable.

• 1:05:41Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 1:05:41Speaker 03

  Once a month, they get together and they do a mating dance.

• 1:05:45Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:46Speaker 03

  The horny toad squirts blood onto the tampecks lizard. And it's one of these symbiotic nature relationships. It's like how the remora fish sticks to the side of a shark. I like remoras. Remora fish will stick, or, or the cleaner fish that go into the mouth of the barracuda. The horny toad will squirt his blood, squirt his blood on the tampon lizard. And it's, it's like, you think about God and how he's made.

• 1:06:14Bobby Lee?

  I think about God all the time.

• 1:06:15Speaker 03

  The symbiotic relationships between nature and all its creatures.

• 1:06:19Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 1:06:20Speaker 03

  And so this is something me and my team were able to bring together.

• 1:06:23Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:06:24Speaker 03

  You did ask.

• 1:06:25Bobby Lee?

  So interesting.

• 1:06:26Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:06:26Bobby Lee?

  Like certain birds will land on a mammal to pick off like little insects and stuff like that. They have a symbiotic relationship.

• 1:06:33Speaker 03

  Yes, that's called the oxpecker.

• 1:06:36Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, the oxpecker, yeah.

• 1:06:37Speaker 03

  It will land on a wildebeest, or it will land on a cape buffalo, or a giraffe, and it will, it will pick blood-filled ticks.

• 1:06:47Bobby Lee?

  Yes, yes, that is true.

• 1:06:49Speaker 03

  Off the mammal, said mammal, and in essence, aids with their health.

• 1:06:54Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:06:55Speaker 03

  Oh, there we go.

• 1:06:56Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, the oxpecker, yeah, pecker, yeah.

• 1:06:57Speaker 03

  Yeah. Is there a shot of the Tampax lizard, though?

• 1:07:02Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:07:02Speaker 03

  It is a new species, it is a new.

• 1:07:04Bobby Lee?

  Well, you discovered it.

• 1:07:05Speaker 03

  It might not be there yet.

• 1:07:07Bobby Lee?

  Two months ago, so I mean, I don't know.

• 1:07:08Speaker 03

  It might not be there yet.

• 1:07:09Bobby Lee?

  We might not have it yet.

• 1:07:10Speaker 03

  It might not be.

• 1:07:11Bobby Lee?

  But let's, let's start, let's talk, start.

• 1:07:12Speaker 03

  We haven't released the.

• 1:07:13Bobby Lee?

  The last thing that we needed to talk about is, this is the most important one, but, I mean, you said, you discovered a species.

• 1:07:20Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:07:20Bobby Lee?

  Not land, not air, not water, right, and you said other.

• 1:07:24Speaker 03

  This is tough.

• 1:07:25Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, this is a tough one.

• 1:07:26Speaker 03

  It's a tough thing.

• 1:07:26Bobby Lee?

  So it could be interdimensional, it also can be, um, um, a, a, a, a, a space thing.

• 1:07:33Speaker 02

  But how did you even discover it?

• 1:07:35Speaker 03

  Okay, this is a toughie, but.

• 1:07:37Bobby Lee?

  (laughing).

• 1:07:39Speaker 02

  Where were you, out in, in outer space?

• 1:07:42Speaker 03

  No, I didn't say it was outer space. It does lean into what you're saying, but let's use the word mythical.

• 1:07:48Speaker 02

  Hmm.

• 1:07:48Speaker 03

  Okay?

• 1:07:49Bobby Lee?

  Okay, well, that would still imply.

• 1:07:51Speaker 03

  There's a lot of ambiguity around it.

• 1:07:52Bobby Lee?

  I understand that, that would still apply that it was in land, water, or air.

• 1:07:57Speaker 03

  But.

• 1:07:58Bobby Lee?

  Even when you say mythical.

• 1:07:59Speaker 03

  Mythical means.

• 1:07:59Bobby Lee?

  Because in Lord of the Rings.

• 1:08:01Speaker 03

  Yes, but in, we live in the real world, the Loch Ness monster is mythical. The chupacabra is, there it is? Oh my god.

• 1:08:10Bobby Lee?

  (laughing).

• 1:08:12Speaker 03

  Oh my god, there it is.

• 1:08:13Bobby Lee?

  (laughing).

• 1:08:15Speaker 03

  I didn't realize, okay, that's been leaked.

• 1:08:18Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:19Speaker 02

  (laughing).

• 1:08:21Speaker 03

  Oh my god.

• 1:08:21Bobby Lee?

  (laughing).

• 1:08:23Speaker 03

  That, that.

• 1:08:25Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, you took that photo, you, I remember you taking that photo.

• 1:08:28Speaker 03

  I was a little mad.

• 1:08:29Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, you texted me that photo.

• 1:08:30Speaker 03

  I wasn't, I haven't released my papers on it yet.

• 1:08:32Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, wow.

• 1:08:34Speaker 03

  But anyways.

• 1:08:35Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, anyway, that's the.

• 1:08:36Speaker 03

  The proof is in the period.

• 1:08:38Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:08:38Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:08:40Speaker 03

  That's funny.

• 1:08:41Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. Okay, so, um.

• 1:08:44Speaker 03

  Boy, that picture is really cramped in there, isn't he?

• 1:08:46Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, it's very good.

• 1:08:47Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's a bloody good picture. It's a. He's really cramped in there. That's all I'm gonna say about a period.

• 1:08:52Bobby Lee?

  I also, if you, if you could, cuz I know that, um, uh, Professor Williams, I know Professor Williams, right? Took a photo of when, when the two lizards met.

• 1:09:04Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 1:09:04Bobby Lee?

  And the spraying effect.

• 1:09:06Speaker 03

  Oh, boy. Oh, boy, you're making my mouth water. That was, what a day that was.

• 1:09:10Bobby Lee?

  We'll give you a second on that one. No, you, you will that, try to, with your research team, while we talk about the other myth, mythical, okay? So, here we go.

• 1:09:19Speaker 03

  Okay, so this is a toughie to talk about. Maybe some people don't believe it.

• 1:09:24Bobby Lee?

  I, I still don't believe it.

• 1:09:25Speaker 03

  But our research.

• 1:09:26Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 1:09:27Speaker 03

  It was in a mountainous area of, believe it or not, not too far from here.

• 1:09:34Bobby Lee?

  Where?

• 1:09:34Speaker 03

  Glendale, California.

• 1:09:37Bobby Lee?

  Wow, really? Literally 10 minutes from here.

• 1:09:40Speaker 03

  Stay with me.

• 1:09:41Bobby Lee?

  Literally 10 minutes from here.

• 1:09:42Speaker 03

  10, 20 minutes.

• 1:09:43Bobby Lee?

  From here.

• 1:09:43Speaker 03

  If there's traffic, 20 minutes. And.

• 1:09:46Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 1:09:46Speaker 03

  This is the beauty of mythical creatures. You don't know when, how, or where they're gonna show up, if they even exist.

• 1:09:55Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 1:09:55Speaker 03

  And the nearest parallel I can give to this is Yeti, Bigfoot, Sausquatch. We've all heard of them.

• 1:10:05Bobby Lee?

  I have.

• 1:10:06Speaker 03

  You've heard of Sausquatch? Yeti.

• 1:10:09Bobby Lee?

  I've heard of.

• 1:10:09Speaker 03

  The Barnable Snowman, Bigfoot.

• 1:10:11Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yes, I have.

• 1:10:12Speaker 03

  Sausquatch.

• 1:10:13Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, I've heard of them, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:10:14Speaker 03

  Have you heard of Sausquatch? What about you, Gumblebump, Fimbledeedump, Flumberdump the Dimbledump? Have you heard of Siswack? No, I've heard of Siswack. Yeah, that's it. Yeah. Yeah, you're in the wheelhouse.

• 1:10:30Bobby Lee?

  You're in the wheelhouse. Very good.

• 1:10:32Speaker 03

  So, this was almost one of these fluke discoveries. I was actually driving through.

• 1:10:38Bobby Lee?

  Oh, there it is.

• 1:10:39Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:10:40Bobby Lee?

  There it is.

• 1:10:40Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:10:41Bobby Lee?

  That's the photo. It snuck up right behind him.

• 1:10:43Speaker 03

  Wow. Interesting. Wow. What are we doing?

• 1:10:51Bobby Lee?

  Are you mad?

• 1:10:52Speaker 03

  I'm sort of... That's my research.

• 1:10:56Speaker 03

  That's because of me that that research exists.

• 1:11:02Bobby Lee?

  Oh my god, that's so funny!

• 1:11:04Speaker 03

  It's bloody good.

• 1:11:07Speaker 03

  Can you have these as pets? What's that? Can you have these as pets? You can, I can't.

• 1:11:15Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. Oh my god!

• 1:11:18Speaker 03

  Oh yeah.

• 1:11:19Bobby Lee?

  I love it.

• 1:11:20Speaker 03

  Apex. Well, now that's a frog...

• 1:11:25Bobby Lee?

  That's a frog-on-frog crime.

• 1:11:28Speaker 03

  Uh, so here we go.

• 1:11:31Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:11:31Speaker 03

  Glendale.

• 1:11:32Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, Glendale.

• 1:11:33Speaker 03

  And wherever there's mountains, and let's be honest, you look out the window...

• 1:11:38Bobby Lee?

  We've been honest this whole time.

• 1:11:40Speaker 03

  I know, but I'm just saying, because a lot of your viewers, Khalyla, have never been to Glendale. They don't realize the vast amount of mountain range that's behind that city. There's a lot of mountains there.

• 1:11:52Bobby Lee?

  It's huge!

• 1:11:52Speaker 03

  Burbank.

• 1:11:53Speaker 02

  Uh huh.

• 1:11:54Speaker 03

  It's the Sierra Nevadas, as far as I... Can you check, is it the Sierra Nev...? It isn't?

• 1:11:59Speaker 02

  No.

• 1:12:00Speaker 03

  What is the mountain range there?

• 1:12:01Speaker 02

  Um, it's not, it's Angela's Crest.

• 1:12:04Speaker 03

  Can we check on that? The, the mountain range behind, up in Glendale, running north towards...

• 1:12:13Speaker 03

  Cher's house?

• 1:12:17Bobby Lee?

  Cher does live there, huh? The Verdugo Mountains?

• 1:12:19Speaker 02

  No, Verdugo Mountains, yeah.

• 1:12:21Speaker 03

  Not the Sierra Nevadas?

• 1:12:23Bobby Lee?

  No, no, no, no.

• 1:12:24Speaker 02

  That's further up.

• 1:12:25Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 1:12:25Bobby Lee?

  Well, you're not a topographer, why would you know? Doctor, there's...

• 1:12:28Speaker 03

  Well, I'm wearing a top right now.

• 1:12:30Bobby Lee?

  Doctor, your video footage released. Oh, wow, there it is. Wow, yeah. There, there.

• 1:12:39Bobby Lee?

  Sorry, we had to...

• 1:12:40Speaker 03

  And again, you'll only see this once a month, so this is rare.

• 1:12:43Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, this is rare.

• 1:12:44Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:12:48Speaker 03

  How do we do it?

• 1:12:50Speaker 02

  This is cra- this is crazy.

• 1:12:54Speaker 03

  And you should, why, this is why they live in Quebec because it's arid. You get one of those Tampax lizards in the rain and it just swells up. It's unbelievable, they can hardly move.

• 1:13:03Bobby Lee?

  Didn't you take a video of the black crow with the pugles?

• 1:13:09Bobby Lee?

  Didn't you do that?

• 1:13:10Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:13:10Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, it's, yeah, find that, it's really easy to find, that video. So, anyway, yes, so the other, we're talking-

• 1:13:16Speaker 03

  The other, the mystical one.

• 1:13:18Bobby Lee?

  There's a mountain range, we don't know what it is.

• 1:13:20Speaker 03

  Mountain range, so I'm always on the search to debunk these mythical creature. Who doesn't want to know the answer to Bigfoot, Yeti, Sausquatch?

• 1:13:29Bobby Lee?

  I never wanted to know.

• 1:13:31Speaker 03

  You didn't?

• 1:13:31Bobby Lee?

  No.

• 1:13:32Speaker 03

  Okay, let's wrap up the show.

• 1:13:35Speaker 03

  Let's wrap up the show, he doesn't want, no, I'm kidding.

• 1:13:37Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:13:38Speaker 03

  Why don't you want to know about Bigfoot?

• 1:13:40Bobby Lee?

  I'll be honest, Professor, I don't really, I've never really believed in that specific mythology.

• 1:13:45Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 1:13:46Bobby Lee?

  I believe the chupacabra.

• 1:13:47Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 1:13:48Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I believe in the Loch Ness monster.

• 1:13:49Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 1:13:50Bobby Lee?

  I believe in, uh...

• 1:13:54Bobby Lee?

  You know, there's that weird Filipino myth of that man in the tree smoking a cigar.

• 1:13:58Speaker 02

  Oh yeah, that's the agda.

• 1:14:00Bobby Lee?

  What?

• 1:14:00Speaker 02

  Agda?

• 1:14:01Bobby Lee?

  Akta.

• 1:14:02Speaker 02

  Akta, no, there's also another word for it, yeah.

• 1:14:04Bobby Lee?

  Isn't there a man in a tree smoking a cigarette?

• 1:14:07Speaker 02

  Smoking a cigar, yeah.

• 1:14:08Speaker 03

  We call those homeless in my neighborhood.

• 1:14:11Speaker 03

  Uh, do you believe that children are the future?

• 1:14:15Bobby Lee?

  And I believe they're in the past as well.

• 1:14:16Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 1:14:17Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 1:14:18Speaker 03

  So here I am, in the hills, the mountains of Glendale.

• 1:14:22Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:14:23Speaker 03

  And I'm looking to debunk the myth of the legendary Sausquatch.

• 1:14:31Speaker 03

  I'm walking along, it's sunset.

• 1:14:33Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:14:34Speaker 03

  I haven't succeeded. I'm driving home through the windy forest road.

• 1:14:40Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:14:42Speaker 03

  I see, silhouetted in the setting sun.

• 1:14:45Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:14:46Speaker 03

  A tall, probably the hairiest humanoid shape I've ever seen.

• 1:14:51Bobby Lee?

  How tall?

• 1:14:52Speaker 03

  I can't tell because of the sun, the refraction of the light.

• 1:14:55Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:14:56Speaker 03

  My eyes don't party on Fun Fun Street.

• 1:14:59Bobby Lee?

  But if you were to guess.

• 1:15:02Speaker 03

  I'd say six and a half feet, maybe 12.

• 1:15:05Bobby Lee?

  Oh, so let's go nine.

• 1:15:07Speaker 03

  It was big. It was a big.

• 1:15:09Bobby Lee?

  Nine feet, big.

• 1:15:10Speaker 03

  Humanoid shape.

• 1:15:11Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:15:13Speaker 03

  I got so excited.

• 1:15:14Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:15:15Speaker 03

  I lost control.

• 1:15:17Bobby Lee?

  Of your vehicle.

• 1:15:17Speaker 03

  Of the Dodge Neon.

• 1:15:18Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:15:19Speaker 03

  And it was also I had.

• 1:15:20Bobby Lee?

  Can I ask you something?

• 1:15:21Speaker 03

  I had Kentucky Fried Chicken on the passenger seat. It could have been the grease. But I was excited.

• 1:15:26Bobby Lee?

  Okay, so, and what happened next?

• 1:15:28Speaker 03

  So I'm swerving all over.

• 1:15:31Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:15:31Speaker 03

  I hit it.

• 1:15:32Bobby Lee?

  Whoa!

• 1:15:34Speaker 03

  Okay?

• 1:15:34Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:15:35Speaker 03

  Could be a mythical, could be the answer, the missing link.

• 1:15:38Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:15:38Speaker 03

  Suddenly we find out about Sasquatch. I jump out of the Dodge Neon.

• 1:15:43Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 1:15:44Speaker 03

  I rushed to the side of the road.

• 1:15:45Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:15:46Speaker 03

  I'm cradling this hairy, hairy thing. It's almost like Shirley Temple, Kenny G, and Cher having an orgy in my arms. And I'm cradling this thing and its eyes are shot and I'm like.

• 1:16:00Bobby Lee?

  His eyes are shot?

• 1:16:01Speaker 03

  Shot.

• 1:16:02Bobby Lee?

  By what?

• 1:16:02Speaker 03

  I think I killed it.

• 1:16:04Bobby Lee?

  Wait, wait, wait, wait.

• 1:16:05Speaker 03

  And I'm like.

• 1:16:05Bobby Lee?

  You hit it with a car and then shot it in the eyes?

• 1:16:07Speaker 03

  Dodge Neon.

• 1:16:08Bobby Lee?

  And then you shot it with the eyes with your gun?

• 1:16:09Speaker 03

  No, it's laying on the ground. I hit it, it landed on the road.

• 1:16:13Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, but you said his eyes were shot.

• 1:16:15Speaker 03

  Shot. Closed.

• 1:16:16Bobby Lee?

  Shut, closed. Oh, shut, shut. Oh, I thought you took.

• 1:16:19Speaker 03

  I was in, shut up and let me tell the story.

• 1:16:21Bobby Lee?

  All right, all right. They were shut.

• 1:16:23Speaker 03

  So they were shut and I'm laying there cradling this behemoth, this hairy beast.

• 1:16:29Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 1:16:29Speaker 03

  And I'm petting his forehead of his hairy face and I'm like, please, don't die Sasquatch, don't die.

• 1:16:37Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 1:16:37Speaker 03

  Finally, his eyes fluttered open and he looked at me right in the face. He said, I'm Armenian.

• 1:16:50Speaker 03

  And I just drove away because a lot of that.

• 1:16:52Bobby Lee?

  Right, right, right. There's a lot.

• 1:16:53Speaker 03

  Glendale, full of them.

• 1:16:54Bobby Lee?

  They played chess at the park.

• 1:16:55Speaker 03

  They're all over Glendale.

• 1:16:56Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, so.

• 1:16:57Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:16:57Bobby Lee?

  So.

• 1:16:58Speaker 03

  Yeah, so anyways.

• 1:16:59Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:16:59Speaker 03

  Came close.

• 1:17:00Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, but so that's not really a species to discover.

• 1:17:01Speaker 03

  I came close.

• 1:17:02Bobby Lee?

  You came close.

• 1:17:03Speaker 03

  Okay, I'm still looking.

• 1:17:04Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, you're still looking. You're still looking. Yeah, I've hit many Armenians and, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I have. You make the mistake.

• 1:17:11Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:17:11Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm glad he didn't die. Did he die?

• 1:17:13Speaker 03

  No, he did not die. No, the hair protected him, cushioned him like bubble wrap.

• 1:17:17Bobby Lee?

  And now he works at a barber shop.

• 1:17:19Speaker 03

  Yeah, but anyways, I feel like we, we got to most of the stories and sort of.

• 1:17:24Bobby Lee?

  Thank you so much.

• 1:17:25Speaker 03

  Got on the edge.

• 1:17:25Bobby Lee?

  I didn't know you could learn so much from Devai.

• 1:17:28Speaker 03

  Yeah, oh yeah. Oh my god. It never stops.

• 1:17:31Bobby Lee?

  It never stops. I mean, what are the things you could become a master of or, you know what I mean? In DeVry, at the DeVry.

• 1:17:37Speaker 03

  Welding.

• 1:17:38Bobby Lee?

  Oh, welding's wild. Yeah, yeah.

• 1:17:40Speaker 04

  Bowling.

• 1:17:41Speaker 03

  What is it?

• 1:17:41Speaker 04

  Bowling.

• 1:17:43Speaker 03

  Bowling is a sport, my guy.

• 1:17:46Speaker 04

  The history.

• 1:17:48Speaker 03

  Yeah, they don't really teach that at DeVry. You might wanna go to like, uh, I don't know, like, Melvin's Nut Farm or something. I don't know.

• 1:17:56Bobby Lee?

  Melvin's Nut Farm. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's where I learned.

• 1:17:59Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:18:00Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:18:00Speaker 03

  But, uh...

• 1:18:01Bobby Lee?

  What else, some other? At DeVry?

• 1:18:03Speaker 03

  At DeVry, welding, woodwork.

• 1:18:05Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, woodwork, yeah.

• 1:18:06Speaker 03

  Machine shop.

• 1:18:07Bobby Lee?

  I, I hear you got the, uh, the, the crow bugle video.

• 1:18:10Speaker 03

  Oh, you got it.

• 1:18:11Bobby Lee?

  Oh, you got it. Catching a fish. We found it. Yeah, awesome. Oh, wow. Look at that, look at that.

• 1:18:16Speaker 03

  Wow.

• 1:18:18Bobby Lee?

  Wow, wow, wow, wow. This is slow mo, guys.

• 1:18:22Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:18:22Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 1:18:28Speaker 03

  It's very, uh, feminine, yeah.

• 1:18:29Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, it's, yeah, very, yeah. Yeah, yeah. That fish is not in a hurry, I'll tell you that.

• 1:18:36Speaker 03

  I also love the fish swims on top of the water.

• 1:18:41Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:18:42Speaker 03

  But that's, uh, that's science, that's science.

• 1:18:44Bobby Lee?

  That's science for ya.

• 1:18:45Speaker 03

  Yeah, thank you DeVry.

• 1:18:47Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, thank you DeVry. So if you ever, don't go to Harvard, you know what I mean, don't go to Berkeley, DeVry.

• 1:18:52Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:18:53Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, um, do you have anything to promote?

• 1:18:58Speaker 03

  How you doing, Harland? Oh, yeah.

• 1:19:01Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. How are you, Harland?

• 1:19:03Speaker 03

  Good.

• 1:19:07Bobby Lee?

  With, with, with Harland, you know what I mean, we don't do that.

• 1:19:10Speaker 03

  Why?

• 1:19:11Bobby Lee?

  A, a normal, like, you know what I mean, what are you up to? I don't do that with this guy, you know what I mean? Cause we're on a different level. You know what I mean, we're, we've evolved. We, we, I mean, we go to the, the festivals together. We, we understand a different...

• 1:19:22Speaker 03

  What do you mean you don't? Now I'm feeling a little neglected, baby. I'm feeling a little, that, that sort of was a bit of a slight.

• 1:19:31Bobby Lee?

  I don't think it was a slight. I don't think that you and I, uh, waste our time with small talk.

• 1:19:36Speaker 03

  I know, but I feel like you're disinterested in my journey now after that little side comment.

• 1:19:41Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, it wasn't a side comment.

• 1:19:43Speaker 03

  We had chuckles, we had laughs.

• 1:19:44Bobby Lee?

  We had chuckles and laughs, but I don't think that we're in a relationship where it's like some, you're a new person, we're out there go, "Where are you from?"

• 1:19:51Speaker 00

  Well, where's he from?

• 1:19:52Bobby Lee?

  Canada.

• 1:19:53Speaker 00

  Where?

• 1:19:54Bobby Lee?

  I don't know, Vancouver, Edmonton, either one.

• 1:19:58Speaker 00

  Pick, pick one.

• 1:19:58Bobby Lee?

  Am I close?

• 1:20:00Speaker 03

  It's alright, Canada's Canada.

• 1:20:03Speaker 03

  Second largest country in the world, from somewhere in the middle.

• 1:20:06Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:20:07Speaker 03

  Okay, got it.

• 1:20:08Bobby Lee?

  Um, been to your house many times?

• 1:20:09Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:20:10Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. Um, I did your movie many, many years ago, where I played a kangaroo?

• 1:20:17Speaker 03

  Kangaroo Hans O'Reilly.

• 1:20:18Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, that's right, Kangaroo Hans O'Reilly, um, and that was what, 20 years ago?

• 1:20:23Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:20:23Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, in the desert?

• 1:20:25Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:20:25Bobby Lee?

  And then you showed me property, that, I, I owned that little property in the middle of the desert.

• 1:20:28Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:20:29Bobby Lee?

  Do you remember that?

• 1:20:30Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:20:30Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, so it's like, I don't think that we need to do this whole like, "Where are you from?"

• 1:20:34Speaker 03

  I think you're right.

• 1:20:35Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:20:36Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:20:36Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I, I know, I've known you for a very long time.

• 1:20:40Speaker 03

  But you really know me?

• 1:20:42Bobby Lee?

  No, it's impossible to.

• 1:20:44Speaker 03

  Does that hurt?

• 1:20:45Bobby Lee?

  Does that hurt you?

• 1:20:47Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:20:48Speaker 02

  I know some things about Harlan.

• 1:20:50Bobby Lee?

  No, but what I'm saying is, is that he has an exterior.

• 1:20:52Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:20:53Bobby Lee?

  Right, that's goofball. Yeah, and it's a defense mechanism that I have, like, when I'm at the Comedy Store, I play a character. You know what I mean, but they don't know.

• 1:21:02Speaker 03

  So you're, this is your, your way of shooting blood at me through your eyes?

• 1:21:08Speaker 03

  Your defense mechanism?

• 1:21:09Bobby Lee?

  It's a defense mechanism, yeah.

• 1:21:11Speaker 03

  Well, she knows about me.

• 1:21:12Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:21:13Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, tell, tell me more.

• 1:21:14Speaker 02

  I know more about, like, your matters of the heart, like, when you went to Germany, fell in love.

• 1:21:19Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:21:19Speaker 02

  That whole, you know, saga of that relationship.

• 1:21:22Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:21:23Speaker 02

  Those are the things that stick.

• 1:21:24Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I remember that too.

• 1:21:25Speaker 03

  Yeah, 'cause you like, you like love, you like emotions.

• 1:21:31Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:21:32Speaker 03

  Bobby likes adventure.

• 1:21:36Speaker 03

  And Bobby's deep, but you never let me get too deep.

• 1:21:39Bobby Lee?

  What is this?

• 1:21:40Speaker 00

  Adventure.

• 1:21:42Speaker 03

  There's our movie.

• 1:21:43Bobby Lee?

  And who, who am I?

• 1:21:45Speaker 00

  What do you mean?

• 1:21:46Speaker 03

  You're Kangaroo Hans O'Reilly.

• 1:21:47Bobby Lee?

  I'm in the, I'm in, I'm in the back, right?

• 1:21:49Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:21:50Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:21:50Speaker 03

  Watch.

• 1:21:51Bobby Lee?

  Turn it up.

• 1:21:52Speaker 03

  I pull you up.

• 1:21:58Speaker 02

  Is that garlic bread teeth?

• 1:22:00Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:22:01Speaker 03

  Look at him. He was born with little curled up kangaroo fingers.

• 1:22:10Speaker 03

  What you would do?

• 1:22:11Bobby Lee?

  My grandfather was telling me, if a bad breeze blow in the way, walk into it so it pass by your way. Which boss?

• 1:22:21Speaker 03

  Wow.

• 1:22:21Bobby Lee?

  Why'd you make me do an Asian accent?

• 1:22:24Speaker 03

  Cause I was your character. Good point.

• 1:22:27Bobby Lee?

  Oh, that's right.

• 1:22:28Speaker 03

  Cause in the movie, I go, I keep a little Chinese friend behind the backseat.

• 1:22:32Bobby Lee?

  Ah, I see, I see, I see.

• 1:22:34Speaker 03

  And then I pull you up.

• 1:22:35Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:22:36Speaker 03

  But I didn't know at that time, to be honest, that you weren't Chinese. Honestly.

• 1:22:40Bobby Lee?

  Really?

• 1:22:41Speaker 03

  Yeah, I didn't know.

• 1:22:41Bobby Lee?

  Oh, you didn't know I was Korean?

• 1:22:42Speaker 03

  We were like, that was.

• 1:22:43Bobby Lee?

  That was the beginning of our friendship.

• 1:22:45Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:22:45Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. It's funny, I didn't even know him that well, and I went into the desert with a man I didn't know that well. Which is a dumb, a dumb thing to do, I think.

• 1:22:54Speaker 03

  Yeah, how did he ask you? It's just, I just called you up.

• 1:22:57Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, you just called me up.

• 1:22:58Speaker 03

  But I was honored that you did it, because you didn't know me that well, and he didn't even read the script, he just said, I'll do it. And when you did that, you ingratiated yourself, you're my friend for life.

• 1:23:11Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:23:12Speaker 03

  Cause that was, that was really generous.

• 1:23:14Bobby Lee?

  Well, I, it was one of those incidences where I was just like, fuck, Harland Williams just called me, and I go, and he's asking me to go in the middle of the desert, cause obviously I was a huge fan, and I was like, yeah, there's like, it's like an obvious yes, there's no, you've never thought about it.

• 1:23:28Speaker 03

  Buddy.

• 1:23:29Bobby Lee?

  I love you, buddy, dude.

• 1:23:29Speaker 03

  I love that. I'm not kidding.

• 1:23:31Bobby Lee?

  I mean, there's some people that would ask now, I probably would say no.

• 1:23:34Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:23:34Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. Would you say no or yes?

• 1:23:36Speaker 03

  It depends who it was. If you asked me to do something, I'd say yes.

• 1:23:39Bobby Lee?

  I know you would.

• 1:23:40Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:23:40Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, and I have something for you.

• 1:23:41Speaker 03

  Oh, wow.

• 1:23:42Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. But, um, there are some people that I, I just wouldn't go to the desert with. You know, right?

• 1:23:49Speaker 03

  It was fun though, wasn't it?

• 1:23:50Bobby Lee?

  Oh, it was, I remember the day.

• 1:23:52Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:23:53Bobby Lee?

  I remember going to your house, I remember, I looked at your property, and I remember shooting that scene, I remember, um, we had sandwiches?

• 1:24:00Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:24:01Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:24:01Speaker 03

  Subway.

• 1:24:02Bobby Lee?

  Subway. Yeah, Subway sandwiches.

• 1:24:04Speaker 03

  And we talked about this last time, you fed yours to the ants.

• 1:24:07Bobby Lee?

  I did, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:24:09Speaker 03

  You found a big ant hill and you fed your Subway to the ants.

• 1:24:11Bobby Lee?

  Well, I think, uh, I like that animal.

• 1:24:14Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:24:14Bobby Lee?

  It's one of my favorites.

• 1:24:15Speaker 03

  You love ants?

• 1:24:16Bobby Lee?

  Anyway, did you, um, did you have fun today?

• 1:24:20Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:24:21Bobby Lee?

  You did, we learned so much. Did you learn a lot Jaime?

• 1:24:24Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:24:25Speaker 02

  I like ants.

• 1:24:26Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I like ants.

• 1:24:27Speaker 02

  I like ant hills.

• 1:24:28Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. I don't like, I don't like them in my house.

• 1:24:30Speaker 02

  I like the cities they build.

• 1:24:32Speaker 04

  Nope.

• 1:24:32Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:24:32Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. But in your house, do you like them when you, you see a straight line?

• 1:24:36Speaker 02

  I literally never kill an ant.

• 1:24:38Speaker 04

  It's, oh.

• 1:24:39Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, what do you, what do Mexicans do?

• 1:24:41Speaker 02

  What?

• 1:24:43Speaker 04

  Oh, ants in the house?

• 1:24:44Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:24:45Speaker 04

  Um, they usually cook.

• 1:24:48Speaker 03

  That's true though, remember like?

• 1:24:49Bobby Lee?

  Oh, they cook ants.

• 1:24:50Speaker 03

  At Pujol they eat.

• 1:24:51Bobby Lee?

  Oh, they cook the ants.

• 1:24:51Speaker 04

  No, the ants cook.

• 1:24:53Bobby Lee?

  Oh, they work for you?

• 1:24:55Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 1:24:55Bobby Lee?

  Oh, interesting.

• 1:24:56Speaker 04

  They look like little ants. And it's not really a line.

• 1:24:59Bobby Lee?

  Are you high?

• 1:25:00Speaker 04

  No, it's not like really.

• 1:25:01Bobby Lee?

  No, what's going on with you right now?

• 1:25:03Speaker 04

  They, they don't form a line. It's a, a trail. It's not really a line. A line's like this.

• 1:25:09Bobby Lee?

  Well, do they, they do like a little dan- what are you talking about? There's a line.

• 1:25:12Speaker 04

  No, it's a trail. They're, they're.

• 1:25:16Bobby Lee?

  I mean, what are they doing?

• 1:25:16Speaker 04

  A trail to their home.

• 1:25:19Bobby Lee?

  It's a trail tears? Or is it joy?

• 1:25:22Speaker 04

  Of joy, because they have food for the queen.

• 1:25:24Bobby Lee?

  Ah, for the queen. Oh, you, you know the hierarchy.

• 1:25:27Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:25:28Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:25:28Speaker 04

  You ever seen The Ant Hill? You ever seen Ants by Woody Allen? It's like little trail ants. You had Ant Hill one time. You know what I'm talking about? My brother?

• 1:25:39Bobby Lee?

  Rarely. Rarely.

• 1:25:41Speaker 04

  Okay.

• 1:25:42Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:25:42Speaker 04

  This guy.

• 1:25:43Speaker 03

  I feel weird being in the middle of your ant talk.

• 1:25:45Bobby Lee?

  I know, but do you, I, I know that movie. Uh, yeah, yeah.

• 1:25:54Speaker 03

  I just feel like a third wheel. I got.

• 1:25:56Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, I apologize.

• 1:25:57Speaker 03

  I don't want to, no, don't. It's a great talk. I just feel like I'm in the middle of it.

• 1:26:01Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, I, I don't know. Yeah, yeah.

• 1:26:03Speaker 03

  I'm a little ant awkward right now.

• 1:26:06Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, you're a little ant awkward. Ant awkward. Hey, honestly, speaking of Antarctica.

• 1:26:10Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:26:11Bobby Lee?

  Why aren't we allowed to go there?

• 1:26:13Speaker 02

  You are.

• 1:26:13Bobby Lee?

  Because of the. I don't think you are.

• 1:26:15Speaker 03

  You are.

• 1:26:16Bobby Lee?

  You're a late, you're, I'm allowed to take a flight to the middle of Antarctica.

• 1:26:20Speaker 02

  Go visit as a tourist, yeah.

• 1:26:22Bobby Lee?

  As a tourist. I, I don't think that's right. Google it.

• 1:26:24Speaker 03

  I just did. Well, I think I know what you're talking about.

• 1:26:27Bobby Lee?

  I think there's a city there.

• 1:26:28Speaker 03

  There's this, there's this, um. Conspiracy theory.

• 1:26:31Bobby Lee?

  That's what I'm saying, yeah.

• 1:26:32Speaker 03

  Where they say that, that there's a certain limit to how far you can go. And to travel in it because it's so barren, you would never know if you're in the exact spot, but they say beyond a certain barrier, there's a myth that there's cities and worlds and creatures and stuff that we're not allowed to see.

• 1:26:52Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, do you believe in this conspiracy?

• 1:26:53Speaker 03

  Well, it's sort of this thing where they say, does the world really end? Like, wha- wha- how much are they letting us know about where we live? It's the Truman theory. What's that? The Truman Show?

• 1:27:04Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:27:05Bobby Lee?

  Oh, because we've never really actually.

• 1:27:06Speaker 03

  Like, who's really been there?

• 1:27:08Bobby Lee?

  Katy Perry.

• 1:27:09Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:27:10Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. She's been there.

• 1:27:13Speaker 03

  Well, what's with this moon thing they just did? And they went all the way up there and they didn't even land.

• 1:27:18Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, why wouldn't you land?

• 1:27:19Speaker 03

  That's like going to Disneyland and not going on the rides.

• 1:27:22Bobby Lee?

  No, it's not even worse. It's like just driving by Disneyland on the 405.

• 1:27:29Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, uh, yeah, yeah, yeah. There it is.

• 1:27:32Speaker 02

  Well, it's the first of many because they're gonna eventually set up a moon colony.

• 1:27:36Speaker 03

  A moon base?

• 1:27:38Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:27:38Speaker 03

  Would you go?

• 1:27:39Speaker 02

  Yeah. No, I'm too afraid of, I would, um, the G-force of even any Disney ride, like, kills me, so I could never be a space person.

• 1:27:48Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:27:49Speaker 02

  Could you?

• 1:27:49Bobby Lee?

  I mean, I don't think if you feel the G-force when you're on the colony.

• 1:27:54Speaker 02

  Yeah, but coming back down, I'd have to come back down eventually. And the heat, did you not see that capsule burn? You didn't see the return of integrity into, back into Earth?

• 1:28:04Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I have integrity.

• 1:28:05Speaker 02

  Watch it, I cried my eyes, my eyes out.

• 1:28:07Speaker 03

  You did? Why?

• 1:28:08Bobby Lee?

  Why?

• 1:28:09Speaker 02

  Oh, no, there's a lot of weird things happening in the world and sometimes when

• 1:28:12Bobby Lee?

  It's fine.

• 1:28:13Speaker 02

  When you see, like, people go up in space and you see those shots of the Earth and it kind of reminds you how like.

• 1:28:19Bobby Lee?

  What mankind can do if we work together.

• 1:28:21Speaker 02

  We're kind of, yeah, it's just we're this, it just, it's a reminder that we're just this rock and we're so small. And it made me emotional.

• 1:28:29Bobby Lee?

  I think a different way. I, I, I, I, I think it shows humanity, working together. You know, it's like, um, that movie, um. Deep Impact.

• 1:28:41Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's your favorite.

• 1:28:42Bobby Lee?

  It's one of my favorite disaster movies. And there's, you know, I like, I like having the black astronaut, you know what I mean? The Russian one, you know what I mean? Like, and did you see, um, Project Hail Mary?

• 1:28:53Speaker 02

  I'm watching it tomorrow.

• 1:28:55Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, there's an Eastern European, a Japanese guy and an American together. I like when they're like, you know what I mean?

• 1:29:00Speaker 02

  Oh, like The Arrival?

• 1:29:01Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, where you're, where all of human race, you know what I mean?

• 1:29:04Speaker 03

  Work together.

• 1:29:05Bobby Lee?

  Working together to do, um, something, you know what I mean? Beyond ourselves.

• 1:29:10Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:29:10Bobby Lee?

  If we're good, right? But instead, you know what I mean? We use it to kill.

• 1:29:16Speaker 03

  You could just see that at IHOP, really.

• 1:29:22Bobby Lee?

  Oh, like at two in the morning, at IHOP, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:29:24Speaker 03

  Like all the ra- all the international, just working to make breakfast.

• 1:29:28Bobby Lee?

  Oh, I see, oh, the Belgian waffle.

• 1:29:30Speaker 03

  The flapjack.

• 1:29:31Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I get it.

• 1:29:33Speaker 03

  Sorry, I didn't mean to step on it, but I-

• 1:29:34Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:29:35Speaker 03

  I love, I love that you get emotional about it.

• 1:29:38Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:29:39Speaker 03

  Cause you look back, you see Earth from that perspective, and you realize it's all we've got, and all the turmoil and the hatred and the war, and the borders and the divides, and you realize we're all just one.

• 1:29:53Bobby Lee?

  We are.

• 1:29:53Speaker 03

  And why do we go through with these stupid, endless, violent confrontations with each other?

• 1:30:01Bobby Lee?

  Exactly.

• 1:30:01Speaker 03

  When we're all the same, we all have this one home.

• 1:30:04Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:30:05Speaker 03

  And we're fighting over nothing.

• 1:30:08Bobby Lee?

  Exactly.

• 1:30:08Speaker 03

  People die.

• 1:30:09Bobby Lee?

  That's, that's, yeah, that's exactly what we're saying.

• 1:30:12Speaker 03

  That can be emotional, I, I'm with you on that.

• 1:30:14Bobby Lee?

  That's emotional. And I think the only way we could, um, unite as a world is if, and this is violent, but if an alien race attacks us. I think Project Hail Mary.

• 1:30:24Speaker 02

  I haven't seen it yet, so, you know, stand by.

• 1:30:26Speaker 03

  Really, you?

• 1:30:27Bobby Lee?

  I, I thought Project Hail Mary was the best movie I've seen in probably ten years.

• 1:30:31Speaker 03

  No.

• 1:30:31Bobby Lee?

  In terms of perfection.

• 1:30:32Speaker 03

  Who'd you go with?

• 1:30:34Bobby Lee?

  What?

• 1:30:34Speaker 02

  His girly.

• 1:30:36Bobby Lee?

  The girl that I'm saying.

• 1:30:37Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 1:30:37Bobby Lee?

  And I never saw the trailer, I never saw, um, anything, I didn't know nothing about it. Nothing. I went to the theater, I go, everyone's telling me to watch this. And we sat there, I cried three times, and at the end of it, I'll tell you why it was perfect.

• 1:30:53Bobby Lee?

  I mean, you know, we, we love pulp fiction. We love Tarantino movies. We love older Scorsese movies like Mean Streets, Hacksaw. There's some darkness to everything and an edge. Especially early 70s cinema, there was a lot of realism, you know what I mean? Right? But there, but I think Steven Spielberg introduced this kind of hope idea and this like kind of family friendly, universal idea of just, um, hope and unity. And I think that Project Hail Mary is very E.T. like in that way.

• 1:31:20Speaker 02

  Oh, I see.

• 1:31:21Bobby Lee?

  Of a feeling of like, um, anybody can watch it, this at any age, regardless, and walk out of the movie and go, that was a really good film.

• 1:31:33Speaker 03

  I wanna see it. You sold me.

• 1:31:34Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, and I think that, um, I, I recommend people watch it before it goes to streaming. I think it's a theater movie. Theater for sure. It's a theater for, yeah, cuz IMAX. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:31:46Speaker 03

  I'll go this weekend, my guy.

• 1:31:48Bobby Lee?

  It really is that good.

• 1:31:50Speaker 03

  Out of 10, what are you giving it?

• 1:31:52Bobby Lee?

  A nine.

• 1:31:54Speaker 02

  What's a 10?

• 1:31:56Bobby Lee?

  Space movie wise. Oh, uh, uh, space movie wise? Oh, that's a really fucking good question. I'm with you. Arrival?

• 1:32:01Speaker 02

  Cuz for me, Arrival's a 10 out of 10. Everything from the score to like the very end, to the, to the story about the child.

• 1:32:09Bobby Lee?

  I'll give Arrival a 10.

• 1:32:10Speaker 02

  There's so many.

• 1:32:11Speaker 03

  Who's in Arrival? I don't remember.

• 1:32:13Speaker 02

  Yeah, Amy Adams.

• 1:32:14Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:32:14Speaker 02

  And Jeremy Renner.

• 1:32:16Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. Fantastic. Yeah, and Keenan Ivory Wayans, Jr. Yeah, and also.

• 1:32:21Speaker 02

  The, the music was by Dennis.

• 1:32:23Bobby Lee?

  No, let me, can I just finish?

• 1:32:24Speaker 02

  I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

• 1:32:25Bobby Lee?

  Go ahead. The music was by Kid Rock.

• 1:32:28Speaker 03

  It was?

• 1:32:29Bobby Lee?

  New Kid, New Kid Rock. The New Kid Rock. New Kid Rock. Yeah, the new kid called, the new Kid Rock.

• 1:32:34Speaker 03

  Alright.

• 1:32:34Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:32:36Speaker 03

  So who's this girl?

• 1:32:39Bobby Lee?

  Amy Adams. She's good in The Arrival.

• 1:32:42Speaker 03

  Oh, the one you went to the movie with?

• 1:32:44Bobby Lee?

  She's a pure imagination. That's none of your business.

• 1:32:47Speaker 03

  Why, is she on Tinder?

• 1:32:49Bobby Lee?

  No, I didn't, no, I met her in the wild.

• 1:32:52Speaker 03

  Well, I'd like to take her to a movie too.

• 1:32:58Speaker 03

  When's it my turn to shine?

• 1:33:00Bobby Lee?

  Uh. Uh.

• 1:33:04Speaker 03

  Is she on Tinder or is she not? I'll find out at my, what's her name?

• 1:33:07Bobby Lee?

  She's not on Tinder.

• 1:33:08Speaker 03

  What's her name?

• 1:33:09Bobby Lee?

  What? Montgomery.

• 1:33:11Speaker 03

  Montgomery what?

• 1:33:12Bobby Lee?

  Ward.

• 1:33:14Speaker 03

  Why you like?

• 1:33:21Speaker 03

  Montgomery what?

• 1:33:22Bobby Lee?

  Ward.

• 1:33:25Bobby Lee?

  Can we get that photo of the Sasquatch holding? I thought you were looking that up.

• 1:33:32Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Cause I think there's a police photography, you know what I mean? Photo of that.

• 1:33:37Speaker 02

  A camera?

• 1:33:38Bobby Lee?

  A camera photo of that. I think he found her.

• 1:33:40Speaker 03

  Are you out with her this weekend?

• 1:33:42Bobby Lee?

  Was this the photo of, with the Armenian guy?

• 1:33:45Speaker 03

  There he is.

• 1:33:45Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. There's the Nissan. Yeah, there's a Nissan.

• 1:33:48Speaker 02

  No, Dodge Neon.

• 1:33:50Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, Dodge Neon, and that's not Harland. Yeah, get specific.

• 1:33:56Speaker 02

  Also, also, there was KFC in the passenger seat.

• 1:33:59Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, get specific. Can I see?

• 1:34:04Bobby Lee?

  Wow, I'd like to take her to town. Let me see, let me look. That's who she is. You want some?

• 1:34:10Speaker 03

  Funyums. Is she a lot of fun?

• 1:34:12Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, she's a cool girl.

• 1:34:14Speaker 03

  I'm happy for you guys.

• 1:34:18Bobby Lee?

  Harland, what's this movie called, Wingman?

• 1:34:20Speaker 03

  Oh, wow, uh-oh.

• 1:34:22Bobby Lee?

  Uh-oh, what?

• 1:34:23Speaker 03

  Is this gonna be a sour spot?

• 1:34:24Bobby Lee?

  It already has been.

• 1:34:26Speaker 03

  Well, this is, last time I was here, we had a fight about it.

• 1:34:29Bobby Lee?

  Oh. I let it go, I don't care.

• 1:34:30Speaker 03

  Okay, well, this is my new movie.

• 1:34:33Bobby Lee?

  Called Wingman.

• 1:34:33Speaker 03

  And can I say something, buddy, because this is...

• 1:34:37Bobby Lee?

  Go ahead.

• 1:34:37Speaker 03

  This is the first time the trailer for Wingman has been shown on a podcast.

• 1:34:44Bobby Lee?

  Yay.

• 1:34:48Speaker 03

  If you'll allow me to show it.

• 1:34:50Bobby Lee?

  Go ahead.

• 1:34:51Speaker 03

  It's my new movie, it's coming out May 26.

• 1:34:54Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:34:55Speaker 03

  Wingman, I wrote it, I directed it.

• 1:34:58Bobby Lee?

  Sure.

• 1:35:00Bobby Lee?

  I'm so excited to see it.

• 1:35:02Speaker 03

  And this is, can I say, here we go?

• 1:35:05Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, well, who's in it?

• 1:35:06Speaker 03

  It's two and a half minutes.

• 1:35:07Bobby Lee?

  Who's in it?

• 1:35:09Speaker 03

  Me.

• 1:35:09Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:35:10Speaker 03

  Jamie Kennedy.

• 1:35:11Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:35:12Speaker 03

  Russell Peters.

• 1:35:13Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:35:13Speaker 03

  Kayla Wallace from Landman.

• 1:35:15Bobby Lee?

  Great cast.

• 1:35:16Speaker 03

  Evan Marsh.

• 1:35:17Bobby Lee?

  Anyway, um...

• 1:35:19Speaker 03

  Here it is.

• 1:35:20Bobby Lee?

  Is Rob Schneider in it too? Let's go.

• 1:35:25Speaker 03

  Your, uh, wingman is now officially on the clock.

• 1:35:35Speaker 03

  How do I know it works?

• 1:35:38Speaker 03

  Does an elephant know how to jerk itself off with its own nose?

• 1:35:42Speaker 06

  You're not actually considering this, are you?

• 1:35:46Speaker 03

  No! Turk Thompson, wingman.

• 1:35:53Speaker 06

  Okay, 'cause like a wingman? What, are you still in high school?

• 1:35:58Speaker 03

  Wingman. You don't get laid, I don't get paid. What have I got to lose?

• 1:36:08Speaker 03

  I need you to take these onion rings down into the jar, stack them on the bald cyclops, and let me know the count. You're nuts! You're a madman! This is a huge mistake! What?

• 1:36:22Speaker 03

  Come on.

• 1:36:25Speaker 03

  Should've let him cool off first.

• 1:36:33Speaker 03

  See anything you like? She's beautiful. Look, have you seen that Julia Roberts movie, Eat, Pray, Love? Yeah. Yeah, well now you're looking at the sequel, Eat, Eat, Eat.

• 1:36:55Speaker 06

  You're crying.

• 1:36:57Speaker 03

  So sad!

• 1:37:00Speaker 03

  What makes you such an expert on women, anyways? P O P, Power of the Pussy.

• 1:37:15Speaker 03

  All right.

• 1:37:17Speaker 03

  That was a mild setback. Dress real nice, we're going for some, uh...

• 1:37:24Speaker 03

  Wall Street Beaver.

• 1:37:47Speaker 03

  There it is.

• 1:37:51Speaker 03

  First trailer.

• 1:37:54Bobby Lee?

  I love it, dude.

• 1:37:55Speaker 03

  Thank you for letting me show it.

• 1:37:56Bobby Lee?

  I've never seen anything like it.

• 1:37:57Speaker 03

  No?

• 1:37:58Bobby Lee?

  No, no, no.

• 1:37:59Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's just-

• 1:37:59Bobby Lee?

  I didn't see Jamie or Russell in it.

• 1:38:01Speaker 03

  Well, what we did is the core of the movie's about this nerd hires this crazy wingman to help him get-

• 1:38:08Bobby Lee?

  I know, I understood that from the thing.

• 1:38:09Speaker 03

  And so-

• 1:38:11Bobby Lee?

  That's obvious, yeah.

• 1:38:12Speaker 03

  And so Jamie plays a rival wingman.

• 1:38:15Bobby Lee?

  Oh, I see.

• 1:38:15Speaker 03

  So he plays my nemesis.

• 1:38:17Bobby Lee?

  Right.

• 1:38:18Speaker 03

  He has high-end clients, I have the low-end losers.

• 1:38:20Bobby Lee?

  Right, right, right, right.

• 1:38:21Speaker 03

  And then Russell Peters plays one of Jamie's high-end clients.

• 1:38:25Bobby Lee?

  Ah.

• 1:38:25Speaker 03

  And he steals that guy's girlfriend.

• 1:38:27Bobby Lee?

  Oh, I see. Don't give it away.

• 1:38:29Speaker 03

  I don't want to give too much away.

• 1:38:30Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, don't give too much away, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:38:32Speaker 03

  But, uh-

• 1:38:32Bobby Lee?

  And you produced and directed it yourself?

• 1:38:34Speaker 03

  I didn't produce it, but I directed it, I wrote it, and starred in it.

• 1:38:38Bobby Lee?

  That's amazing.

• 1:38:39Speaker 03

  It's coming out May 26th, and you can go to harlandwilliams.com and get a pre-order for Apple TV. And, uh, so we're excited, buddy.

• 1:38:54Speaker 03

  Thank you, thank you, yeah.

• 1:38:56Bobby Lee?

  You know, it's so funny, Andrew and I created our own thing, a TV show.

• 1:39:00Speaker 03

  You did?

• 1:39:00Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, we produced it ourselves, and we're putting it out soon in-

• 1:39:03Speaker 03

  What?

• 1:39:04Bobby Lee?

  -November. And I think that's the next, you know, wave of doing it.

• 1:39:08Speaker 03

  Isn't it great?

• 1:39:08Bobby Lee?

  I love it because you have control.

• 1:39:10Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:39:11Bobby Lee?

  And no notes.

• 1:39:13Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:39:13Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, and I don't have people breathing down my leg, "Do it this way," or-

• 1:39:17Speaker 03

  I love it.

• 1:39:18Bobby Lee?

  "Or you can't say that," or whatever.

• 1:39:20Speaker 03

  That's the bit, because Theo and Spade just put out their movie.

• 1:39:23Bobby Lee?

  I'm in that, too, yeah.

• 1:39:24Speaker 03

  You're in that, too, yeah?

• 1:39:25Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:39:25Speaker 03

  I'm excited to see it.

• 1:39:26Bobby Lee?

  I couldn't get into Wingman, but-

• 1:39:29Bobby Lee?

  I get me into every other movie, I just attire, you know what I mean, all, you know, all of it, but.

• 1:39:33Speaker 03

  We're not gonna relit.

• 1:39:34Bobby Lee?

  I'm not reliving anything.

• 1:39:36Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:39:36Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:39:37Speaker 03

  But you know your love.

• 1:39:38Bobby Lee?

  I love. Eat, love, pray.

• 1:39:40Speaker 03

  Wait, can you tell me about?

• 1:39:42Bobby Lee?

  No, I can't, I gotta go.

• 1:39:43Speaker 03

  With Andrew? Your, your project with Andrew?

• 1:39:46Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I can say.

• 1:39:46Speaker 03

  You let me plug mine, I'd like to plug yours.

• 1:39:49Bobby Lee?

  This is my show.

• 1:39:50Speaker 03

  I know, but it's up to me if we plug your project or not.

• 1:39:54Bobby Lee?

  All right, um.

• 1:39:55Speaker 03

  I'd like to plug his project, it's called.

• 1:39:58Bobby Lee?

  The, the Bad Game Show.

• 1:40:00Speaker 03

  And do we have a trailer?

• 1:40:01Bobby Lee?

  No, we just shot last week. All of it.

• 1:40:04Speaker 03

  And thirdly, you don't have to snap my head off.

• 1:40:08Bobby Lee?

  I didn't.

• 1:40:08Speaker 03

  I'm just trying to be your friend.

• 1:40:11Bobby Lee?

  I, I'm, I am your friend.

• 1:40:12Speaker 03

  I'm trying to promote you.

• 1:40:13Bobby Lee?

  I know you're on my own podcast.

• 1:40:15Speaker 03

  You snapped real deep and real hard, guy.

• 1:40:17Bobby Lee?

  Yeah?

• 1:40:18Speaker 03

  I'm fucking with you, guy, I'm an actor, I'm an actor, didn't you see?

• 1:40:22Bobby Lee?

  Oh, it's the character from Wingman.

• 1:40:23Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:40:24Bobby Lee?

  Wow. Come on. Thank you so much.

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