Ed Mylett - Unlocking Your Success Code

In this audio I discuss the keys to building a recipe of success in all different areas of one's life. Art and science of peek performance. The process of thinking correctly and developing perfect habits. How the reticular activating system(RAS) works in the brain and much more Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Ed Mylett?

  I hear so many small business owners say the exact same thing. They just never have enough time in the day. Well, I measure time differently. I've compressed, condensed, heck, I've bent time. My first day is 6:00 a.m. to noon. My second day starts at noon and goes till 6:00 P.M. And my third day, 6:00 P.M. to midnight. I now get 21 days a week. Stack that up over a month, over a year, over five years, and my life's completely different than it would have been otherwise. And if you want to win as an entrepreneur, you have to compress your time too. And you definitely can't afford to waste it waiting weeks on a big bank for capital. Your best bet's to work with my friends at Cardiff. They know how to compress time for entrepreneurs. They get your business approved in minutes and funded the very same day. They're America's favorite small business lender, and for good reason.

• 0:45Ed Mylett?

  Over 20 years in business, over 12 billion deployed to small business across America. Stop letting bank delays slow down your momentum. Head to cardiff.co/ed. That's cardiff.co/ed. Cardiff.co. Real growth, fast funding. Cardiff. Borrow better.

• 1:01Speaker 01

  Mr. President, my company, for me, of the explosion on our rig.

• 1:05Speaker 02

  On October 2nd.

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  Causing massive water displacement and triggering a tsunami. They all heap the blame on me.

• 1:11Speaker 02

  Tom Cruise is. Digger got us into this mess. And Digger's gonna dig us up. From the director of Birdman and the Revenant.

• 1:18Speaker 01

  What would happen if I stopped drilling? You stop, you freeze to death, that's what.

• 1:22Speaker 02

  With great power comes great deniability.

• 1:25Speaker 01

  I'm not the first nanny.

• 1:27Speaker 02

  Digger. See the trailer online. Only in theaters October 2nd. Rated R. Under 17. Not a minute without parent.

• 1:33Speaker 03

  Morning. This podcast is intense. It's for bold visionary dreamers with a passion and guts to become a champion.

• 1:43Ed Mylett?

  Welcome to Unlocking Your Success Code, everybody. This is Ed Mylett, and it's my honor to get a chance to spend this time with you today and share some thoughts and some insights with you into you actually unlocking the code to your success. I'm excited to share these ideas with you. It's been a long time since I've got a chance to share with folks exactly what my philosophies are that I've learned over the years that have helped me think correctly in business and then act correctly as a result. And so, the good news for you. Is that you already know what your success code is. You've unlocked it many times in your life and many different circumstances. Maybe you've forgotten it. Maybe you've forgotten parts of it. And today will be a refresher course to remind you exactly how you've performed at your peak in the past. And as we begin today, I want you to think about that. What

• 2:26Ed Mylett?

  are some of the great successes of your life? Some of the times in your life where you just performed at your peak, you nailed it. It was a talk, it was a test, it was an athletic endeavor, something that you did, a conversation that you had, where you just nailed it. It was just your peak. It was the best. You couldn't believe it was so good. And that's when that code has all come together. It's also like a recipe. It's throwing in the right ingredients that put together the perfect meal or the perfect performance. And that's what we're going to discuss today. And I'm going to do it in more of a free flow type setup. I'm not going to give you one of these things where the top 10 things you got to do to be a this, or the top eight, or the 21 laws of, I just don't believe in that. I don't think there are just a fixed number of eight, or 10, or 21. And those seem to be kind of almost marketing strategies. I just want to have a free flowing conversation.

• 3:09Ed Mylett?

  You and I as friends, me sharing with you a little bit of the things that I've used to help myself become successful to the extent that I have, and things I've learned from my associations and my friends. And really, today is about you. It's not about me. But I think you should have some context as to why maybe I have some qualifications to share this with you. I was a millionaire before I was 30 years old. I had risen in my company, which is one of the top financial services distribution companies in the world. By the time I was 30, I was in the top three of all time in that company, went on to make multiple seven figures of income, and then multiple, multiple seven figures of income, and had a chance in that company because of some of the success my teammates and I had to be asked to take on a larger role in the company where I helped move the entire company strategically with the tactics and some of the inspirational strategies as well,

• 3:53Ed Mylett?

  and just day to day moving of the company and became the agency chairman of that firm. And then through that success, I've had a chance to build some of the great friendships of my life outside of business with some of the great athletes that you know by name in the United States, and top CEOs of companies, entertainers, etc., become part of my mastermind, part of my friendships, that I've learned from them. And even from time to time, believe it or not, many of them asked me for counsel. I've counseled with some of the top CEOs in the United States, top NFL quarterbacks. Players, hockey players, actors, entertainers that you would know have asked me to share with them some of these concepts or if they're going through something, work them through it and they've done the same for me. So I've had a chance to have this play itself out in my life, both in the business that I'm in and outside of it. And I know that these

• 4:36Ed Mylett?

  strategies and these tactics work. And I think some of them will be a refresher for you. But I think in many ways, some of these will be new to you and said in maybe a little bit of a different way. And really what we're talking about today is we unlock your code to success. For you, how is it that you think? Have you ever thought about how you think? Isn't that interesting? Do you ever think about how you think? And what is the process of thinking? I'll submit to you that thinking is the process of asking and answering questions to yourself. And that's how it works. And so if we're going to change the way we think, we've got to change the quality of the questions that we ask ourselves. And so what I'll do today is I'll share these ideas with you. I'd like, as I talk with you, for you to be reflecting on how you think and how you act and what's worked for you in the past

• 5:20Ed Mylett?

  and what changes you might need to make. Maybe you'll listen to this 15 minutes at a time and take notes and come back the next day and listen for 15 more minutes. Maybe some of you take it almost like drinking out of a fire hydrant. You're going to listen to the entire recording all at one time. Maybe you listen to it many times. But I would challenge you to be reflecting on you as we talk about that. Because I said earlier, this isn't about me, it's about you. So let's start. Let's move forward. Let's get you to the next level. Let's make a shift. As we begin, let's think about this for a second. In five years from now, you will certainly arrive somewhere. It's not a question of whether you're going to be somewhere five years from now. The only question is where will you be? Where do you want to be five years from now? And if you can answer that

• 6:01Ed Mylett?

  question with great clarity, with great specificity, you have already beaten 99% of the people you'll be competing with to get there. Because most people in their lives are what I consider to be wandering generalities. They're not clear on where they're going, whichever way the wind blows. They react all of their lives rather than anticipate. The difference between winning and losing in life, most times is being able to anticipate what's coming because you're clear about where you're going, as opposed to reacting. A few days ago, I was playing a video game with my son. He's just a Video game expert, many of you probably relate to this and I never played a lot of video games growing up and so he hands me this game console thing to play with the joystick, if you will, when I was a kid and he beats me in this football game forty-eight to nothing in the first quarter. I don't know if you've ever played a video game with a twelve or a thirteen-year-old,

• 6:45Ed Mylett?

  but you've got no chance if you're over twenty years old. That's just the bottom line. And he just continued to beat me as if I wasn't even there. And if you've done any video games with any kid, you know what I'm talking about. And it occurred to me as we were playing this game that I was reacting to everything that was happening and he was anticipating what was happening. And that's the difference in the game of life as well. The champions, the winners, anticipate what's next because they've got a clear game plan, clear thinking, confidence, clarity of thought. Those that lose constantly react to a disagreement, a setback at work, a conversation, an emergency that comes up. They're constantly in reactionary mode and they find themselves in five years just sort of floating down the river of life and they end up wherever they end up. Winners take control of their lives through their relationship with God, if they have

• 7:30Ed Mylett?

  that, and their relationship with themselves and their direction and their clarity. And so, as we begin today, where do you want to arrive in five years? Are you looking right now for a transition to the next level of your life? Or are you looking for an all-out transformation? You say, "Ed, I don't dislike where I am, I hate where I am, I've got to move to the next level. I've got to transform my life to a completely different place." Or maybe you're listening today saying, "You know, things are going pretty good. I'm looking for a few keys to take it up a notch, to go to one more level, to go to the next place, the next station, as I climb my climb." Whichever one it is, a transition or a transformation, we can get you there. So let's take a look at the quality of your life as we begin. And again, I'm going to just free-flow throw things at you. You know, really, thinking is almost like software in your brain.

• 8:15Ed Mylett?

  For many of us, from time to time, if you ever use an older computer, how it's slower or doesn't really react the way the new ones do, it's amazing what technology can do today. Sometimes we just need to update the software in our brain, update the thinking. It's not that we think wrong, it just needs updating for today's standards, for today's world, for the modern world we live in. You know, you can't get in today's world and be a peak performer with an old software system running the computer in your brain. You've got to have an up-to-date, modern computer system, modern software system, which is your brain. So let's begin with what all champions do. What we really want, correct me if I'm wrong, but I think you just want the quality of your life to be better. You want to be happier. At the end of the day, you could take all personal development, you could take all

• 8:58Ed Mylett?

  of it and distill it into one thing. I want to be happier. If having more money makes you happier, wonderful. Having material things make you happier, a better relationship, your body's better, you just feel better about what you're contributing, you're getting recognized more, whatever those things are, they're to make you happier. And so, if you look at your life, I'll submit to you that the quality of your life, day to day, is the quality of the emotions that you experience. I mean, if on a daily basis, you're experiencing happiness, joy, fulfillment, contribution, peace, ecstasy, passion, if you're delivering all of those emotions to yourself on a daily basis, if you're experiencing those things, would you agree with me, hour by hour, one hour you're happy, the next hour is ecstasy, the next hour is contribution, the next hour

• 9:41Ed Mylett?

  is peace, you'd have a wonderful life. On the other hand, if most of the days you're experiencing depression, frustration, stress, worry, lack of confidence, shame, rejection, if you're getting that most of the time, those are the experiences that you have, the emotions you have on a daily basis, the quality of your life is not as good. So if you think about it, our lives come down to the quality of what our emotions are. Day to day, what we need to do is improve the quality of what we experience emotionally. The three things that deliver on those emotions are the quality of the relationships we have, the quality of our beliefs, and the quality of the questions we ask ourselves, i.e. our thinking. Let me say that to you again. The quality of our life is made up by the emotions we

• 10:26Ed Mylett?

  experience, there's no question about that. And what makes up those emotions is the quality of the relationships we have, the relationships we have with other people, the relationship we have with ourselves, the relationship you have with your higher power, your Lord, your God, if you have one. Those relationships, the quality of those relationships, if they're great, make us very happy. If they're not so good, it's difficult to have all of those positive emotions. Second thing is the beliefs that we have. What do we believe about ourselves? What do we believe about events when they happen and what they mean to us? We'll discuss a little bit later. What do we believe about life in general? Our purpose for being here? What do we believe about the reason we were put here? What do we believe about what something happened in our Dean means to us? And then lastly is the ongoing dialogue in our head? The thinking that we have, the quality of the questions.

• 11:10Ed Mylett?

  If all day long you're asking yourself, well, what are these people thinking about me? Or I can't do this? Or I wonder if they're gonna think I'm silly for performing this task? Or I hope I'm not gonna get rejected? Or if you're worried about all the time? If those are the questions you're asking yourself? The quality of your emotions aren't gonna be very good. But if we can program the right questions that you ask yourself? You can begin to think like the CEOs that I know. Think like the top NFL quarterbacks that I know. Think like the best entertainers and athletes in the world. Some of the great philanthropists in the world. If you can begin to think like them, maybe even think a little bit like me? To some degree? Maybe, to some degree, the quality of your emotions will improve. And so what I'm telling you is changing your life on the outside is about changing the inner game on the inside. Changing how we think.

• 11:53Ed Mylett?

  Changing our relationships, changing our beliefs. The outside world that we experience is driven by everything that happens inside our brain, inside our soul, inside our mind. And so what we're gonna talk about is how do we do that? I think you're gonna get great value out of this today. People say to me, well, at the end of the day, you've seen a lot of people win and lose. In my business, for example, I've seen all different kinds of people win. I've seen smart people win. I've seen people I wouldn't consider to be very smart win. I've seen tall people, short people, fat people, skinny people. I've seen multiple ethnicities, religions, win in business. I've seen people with incredible skills win? And I've seen people with incredible skills lose? I've seen people with mediocre skills win in business. People say, well, what does it come down to then?

• 12:36Ed Mylett?

  And if I could just give you one word, and it'll surprise you? But I think that one word is confidence. I'm telling you, the people that win are confident. They expect to win. They deserve to win in their minds. And the people that struggle regardless of their background, regardless of their skills, lack confidence. Confidence. I remember when I played baseball, I was an average athlete. I played high school, then went on to play in college. And I remember seeing guys go on to play to the next level that were not the best players that I had played with growing up. My teams, but they were the guys who thought they were the best. They were the guys who expected to get a hit in the right time. They were the guys with the most confidence. If you've ever been around any professional athlete, they may come across humble. They may awe shucks you.

• 13:17Ed Mylett?

  They may seem very nice, but I'm telling you, inside, they have tremendous confidence. That's how you can perform in the crunch time. That's how you earn the starting job. That's how you get a scholarship to play college football, is to have great confidence. And so what I want to try to help you do is be happier. And I think one of the ways we can deliver that to you, in my opinion, it's probably never been said in all these personal development tapes this clearly, is to have more confidence. So let's go into thinking for a second as we shift. And again, 15 minutes at a time, you could stop this right now and just reflect on what we've covered. Or we can continue down the road. There's a lot more coming. So these thoughts that I say are physical is really, really interesting because there's a book called As a Man Thinketh by James Allen. I just want to read to you one excerpt here.

• 14:00Ed Mylett?

  He says, "Every man is where he is by the law of his being. The thoughts which he has built into his character have brought him there. In the arrangement of his life, there is no element of chance, but all as a result of a law which cannot error. This is just as true of those who feel out out of harmony when their surroundings as if those who are connected with them. Man is buffeted by circumstances so long as he believes himself to be the creature of outside conditions. But when he realizes that he may command the hidden soil and seeds of his being, out of which circumstances grow, he then becomes the rightful master of himself." So he's talking about as you think becomes your life, and he's right. And so we're not talking here about just positive thinking.

• 14:43Ed Mylett?

  If you just think positive, if you just think great things, I've never bought into that. I've never believed that. I think it's great to think positively, but there's a lot more. What we're talking about here is tactical strategies that help you manifest the right things in your life through, if you have a relationship with God, the two of you partnering together. We're talking tactical strategies. And then of course, at the end of the day, effort, work, putting in the hours required to win. Nobody wins by working less. I categorically disagree with the concept that work smarter, not harder. Do both. Because those of you that just work smarter and not harder will be defeated every time by those who work smart and hard. One of my very good friends is a couple of them are pretty well-known guys in the football world that I've talked about earlier. And one of the things I know about them is they're incredibly smart guys when it comes

• 15:28Ed Mylett?

  to their position, but they also invest the most hours. And that's why they beat the guys who are just also talented or just put in the hours. The combination of hard work and ability is what wins. So it's both. Now, all change is either how we feel or our actions. We can only change two things, how we act and how we feel. So first thing you gotta do is you gotta believe it's possible. As you listen to me right now, you've got to believe it's possible for this transformation for you. You are always going to be limited by what you think is possible. In fact, you're getting out of life right now exactly what you think you deserve. That's hard to accept sometimes to believe. You mean this horrible thing, these emotions I'm experiencing right now? This is what I think I deserve? I'm telling you, I believe that to be true.

• 16:12Ed Mylett?

  Maybe not the exact specific situation that you're going through, but the overall scope of our lives, the overall way we feel about it, the emotions we experience are what we think we deserve, and there's patterns to it. And so if you're gonna go win in business, you gotta be confident. If you're gonna win in business, you gotta be happy. If you're gonna win in business, you have to have great relationships, great beliefs, great thoughts, and then you have to take great action. You gotta have confidence. So when we talk about these things, realize all of this filters through into business and winning. Okay? All change is either how we feel, it's our confidence or our actions. You gotta believe it's possible. If you just wanna go to the next level, you gotta believe it's possible. And again, what have you done in the past to win? When you got your degree in college? Or you scored a touchdown in football somewhere? Or you ended up getting the date that you wanted to go out on?

• 16:57Ed Mylett?

  Or passing an exam? Or whatever it was in your life? Getting the job that you wanted at one time? What was the formula? What was the recipe? And we'll go back through these things. One of the things we have to believe when it's possible is we also have to drop something what I call learned helplessness. Learned helplessness is believing that other people control our lives, that we're helpless, that somehow how other people treat us or talk to us, or whether they do or don't give us opportunities, is what's going to determine where we go. Other people don't control your life. That's called learned helplessness. That is a negative, incorrect, flawed, faulted belief. I want you to hear me. Other people do not control you and your life. They can't control how you feel. They can't control how you think, and they will not control your beliefs or your emotions.

• 17:42Ed Mylett?

  You gotta drop this learned helplessness. Well, so and so didn't help me, or I didn't catch a break there, or they did this to me. People don't do things to you. Okay? Now, I want you to think about something. What if everything that happened in your life, I mean, every single thing, wasn't happening to you, but it was happening for you? What if you believe that everything that happens to me is happening for me, not to me, or through me? Things don't happen to you. I promise you that. Things happen for you. Through the seed of every adversity, there is something planted for you to do something great with it and positive. And I know that sounds hokey, but if you're gonna go through life believing that things happen to you, you will constantly be a person who reacts.

• 18:26Ed Mylett?

  But if you can begin to go through life with just this one belief that things happen for me. We were in traffic the other day. I'm one of the most impatient people on planet Earth. My wife is one of the most patient people on Earth. I don't know if any of you can experience this, but if you have a person who's sort of an aggressive driver, which I am from time to time, my wife just goes through terror having to drive in the car with me. So we got behind somebody who was going very slow, and I was frustrated. I wanted to go around them. Maybe some of you can relate to that. And for just that split second, they were doing this to me. Mr. Personal Development here, Mr. Think Right, none of us do it all the time. None of us are perfect. I fall down every day in my thinking. I make mistakes every day. These things we're talking about today are one of the great lessons for me as I'm giving them to you.

• 19:10Ed Mylett?

  They reteach me. They remind me of things I mess up every single day. None of us are perfect. And when you listen to these things, I hope you don't think, oh, these other people have it all figured out. Man, they think so perfectly. They act so perfectly. Human beings are flawed. Human beings make mistakes. It's about, life is about getting off course and getting back on, not staying on it 100% of the time. What a boring life we would have if we never got off course, if everything was certain, if everything was predictable. So I'm off course all the time, off course more than... And most people probably, the problem is because I know all this stuff, I know when I'm off course and it's even more frustrating. But having said that, we're behind this lady and it was just driving me crazy and I couldn't get around her and, and my wife Kristiana says to me, she goes, you know, did you ever think just for a second that maybe God put her in front of you to slow down because up

• 19:54Ed Mylett?

  in front of us, there's an accident waiting to happen? And maybe we're slowing down to miss it? I said, you're crazy, get out of here, this positive mumbo jumbo. But I gotta tell you, about 10 minutes later, I finally got around this lady and we ended up behind a car that was swerving so bad on the road. It was late at night, they were swerving on this windy highway we were on. And I'm telling you, I'm not sure of this, but the person looked to me like they probably were drinking and driving. And that person could have caused an accident, you know, thank God they didn't. But it was just amazing that she had just said that to me and then 10 minutes later, we catch up to somebody that maybe could have done harm to my family. And in that car, I had my wife and my two children, my entire life was in that car and everything that mattered to me was in that car. And so, I think we all need to know, things happen for us, not to us.

• 20:36Ed Mylett?

  Even though it doesn't always look like it at the time, eventually that's usually revealed to us. So, let's get into out of this learned helping this stuff. I talked earlier about life being certain. I want to throw something at you, a concept I want you to consider. What if I told you, I think the quality of your life is directly proportional to the amount of uncertainty you can handle at one time? Everybody wants things in life, you think about it, we always want things predictable and certain and in a box and perfect. I'm telling you, that's boring. I think the quality of your life is how much uncertainty you can deal with at once. I'm serious. You think about some of the most fun experiences of your life, there was a ton of uncertainty involved, whether it was the first date with somebody, or your wedding day, or a graduation day, or some achievement you had going into a game, or an exam, all this uncertainty was there and then you pulled it off.

• 21:21Ed Mylett?

  Or something fun you've done, like going on a roller coaster, or down a waterfall, or the first time you went fishing, or the first time you did something of any type that you fell in love with, there was uncertainty everywhere. And that's how you gotta start to look at business. If you're gonna go prospect somebody, you can't hope for certainty. What makes us alive, what makes us happy is the uncertainty. We don't know what's going to happen. You have a meeting at your office, a big group meeting, you don't know what's gonna happen? That makes us alive. Your quality of your life is how much uncertainty you can handle anytime. The happiest people I know are constantly seeking situations that are uncertain and uncomfortable. Whether it be for fun or for business. In fact, successful people are addicted to uncertainty. You ever meet some of these athletes who played in these big games all their career? They have 15-year careers and every game's uncertain, every play's uncertain, you never know. And then it's over.

• 22:06Ed Mylett?

  And then they get into a humdrum, routine lifestyle. Every day's the same and they're miserable. They don't just miss the competition. Competition is uncertain, but they miss the uncertainty of it. They miss not knowing. They miss experiencing things. Things that are certain, you don't really experience. You experience uncertain things. So constantly, I challenge you, put yourself in situations where it's uncertain. You'll be the most alive you've ever been. And long-term, even when you get wealthy, put yourself in situations where it's uncertain and you'll be happier and happier and happier. Quality of your life, uncertainty is one of the biggest things, I think, direct proportion to how happy we become. Get uncomfortable.

• 22:43Ed Mylett?

  Now, one of the things most people avoid to win, let's just get right to it, is rejection. What most people believe is rejection is a negative. Regretion is some process of people being negative towards you. And I'm telling you that I think you need to begin to look at rejection as something that is uncertain, that is fun. See, if you get addicted to what other people think about you, this is connected very closely to learned helplessness, as if other people dictate how happy you're going to be. See, I'm telling you that rejection is progress. And in life, progress is happiness, as long as from an event you've learned something. I remember early in my career, going to prospect somebody to get them interested in my business and me just messing it up so bad and embarrassing myself.

• 23:27Ed Mylett?

  And then afterwards, you know, getting in the car or reflecting on it myself and thinking, okay, that was embarrassing, that hurt a little bit. But then really beginning to go, okay, what did I learn from it? What mistake did I make there? Where did I lose control of that conversation? How could I handle that better? The next time someone asks me that objection, how am I going to answer it better? And as I look back at it now 23 years later, it was those experiences that improved me. Had it just gone well, well, that would have just been another person in business, I wouldn't have gotten any better. In baseball, when I played, if you hit 300, you were one of the greatest. ...hitters of all time. Well, that's failing seven out of 10 times. The key is when you do fail, the seven times is going back into the dugout and go, okay, what did he throw me there? Was that a curve ball in the outside half? What was the pattern? Did I get out in front on my front leg? How do I make an adjustment the next time I get up?

• 24:12Ed Mylett?

  And that's progress. So being rejected is an opportunity to improve. It's an uncertainty and it's an opportunity to improve. Why you react the way you do is that your life is too dependent on what other people think about you. In fact, most people's lives are dominated by the thoughts of other people. They're constantly thinking about what other people are thinking about them. Let me give you a key that someone said to me earlier in my career. Other people aren't thinking about you. They're thinking about what you're thinking about them. But if your life is dominated by the thought of what are they thinking about me? Or trying to get other people's approval, you'll be unhappy. And that's how most people live their lives is to get other people's approval rather than their own. Rather than gods, rather than having a clear plan of what makes them happy

• 24:56Ed Mylett?

  or what their standards are. They seek approval from other people. And so then the fear of rejection is exaggerated so much because their whole life is dictated by what other people think about them. I see this happen in business where people avoid rejection. If you're gonna win in business, you've got to accept the fact that there is rejection and rejection is progress, progress is happiness and you can learn from it. But if rejection is, if your whole life is dominated by what other people think about you, what that really means is you're not taking control of your emotions. You're not taking control of what you think. You're allowing them to dictate your life and now you react all the time instead of anticipate. And I'm telling you, that's the great failure of most people is they worry too much

• 25:39Ed Mylett?

  about what other people think about them. Other people aren't thinking about you. I promise you, they're thinking about what you're thinking about them. If your life is about impressing other people, you will never fill up that hole. But if your life is about you and impressing you and satisfying you and if you have a relationship with God, satisfying God, that's what matters. Not with the outside world. This cast of, this cast of characters, which is everybody else outside of your family and God. They eventually go away in your life. They won't be at your funeral. They won't be at the end of your life. All these people you worry about every day, whether they think about if you prospect them in your business and they say no, and you giving them all this power to emotionally affect you, where you won't prospect them because you're so worried about what they think. Or you won't get up and speak because you're so worried about what they think.

• 26:22Ed Mylett?

  Or you won't go on an appointment because you're worried about they might reject you. You've given away total control of your life to people who aren't going to be significant at the end of your life, or even in the middle of it. It's giving power and control of your life to other people. And that is a formula for losing. And it's the number one thing people who lack confidence do. Confident people worry about what them and God think. People with lack of confidence worry about what everybody else thinks. And I see it in rejection in business, and I also see it in these other ways. Even people that win are so addicted to what people think. I, I, everyone struggles with that to agree, I want people to like me, I want validation. It's nice, but it's not what my dominating thought is. It's not what drives my behavior. What drives my behavior is my goals.

• 27:01Ed Mylett?

  What drives my behavior is my beliefs, my confidence, my mission, my obsessions are what drive my behavior. And me trying to do the right things by me and my God, not by what some stranger thinks, or someone at a meeting. And so I want you to begin to challenge yourself to get out of that mode, and get into you and God, and get into the mode of being approval there. Being rejected and worrying about it is an addiction to other people's approval. Don't give yourself that addiction. It's an emotional dependency. If your emotions are dependent on other people, you will always, always end up being unhappy. Let me say it to you again. If you're emotionally dependent on other people's approval, you will always be unhappy. You will never fill it up.

• 27:45Ed Mylett?

  And if you're emotionally dependent on getting approval from people, and that prevents you from prospecting, or working hard in your business, or going on calls, you will lose, because you're too worried about what other people think about you. So get out of there. Don't do that anymore. Okay, here we go. Let's talk about your mind for a second here. We can only receive what our mind can accept. Let me say it to you again, you can only receive what your mind will accept. So, right now, you're really getting, as I said earlier, what you're willing to tolerate. You can't get more out of the outside part of your life that your mind can conceive of. And so, that's why it's important, people say, "Well, be a dreamer, have visions." It is important to do that because your mind paints pictures. Thoughts are physical things. When you think, you actually have caused action to take place, believe it or not. I meet people sometimes who say, "I don't know about all this mumbo jumbo thinking stuff."

• 28:30Ed Mylett?

  And then I look at them, and they're some of the great thinkers I know. They just do it unconsciously. Thoughts are like magnets, they attract things to you, they're physical. When you actually think of something like, "I'm gonna have this, or I wanna do that." Believe it or not, the first thing that happens is you actually create a new space that didn't exist before you thought it. And then what happens is your mind goes to work on trying to fill up that space with proving it to be true. And so, thinking is awesome, thinking is powerful, thinking is an action, thinking is physical. And thinking is a process of asking and answering questions. And so, I wanna challenge you, you will only get that which your mind can accept. And you know what? You're only gonna get what you allow to continue. If you're one of these people listening to this today, and the conditions of your life are not what you want, or the conditions of your business are not what you want them to be,

• 29:15Ed Mylett?

  you need to stop allowing that to continue. You're the one allowing that to continue, nobody else is. And so, if your business is too small, or you're not growing the way you wanna do, or you're not making the income that you want, you're the one who's allowing that to continue, you are. And you've gotta be the one to change right now and say, "My mind is going to accept abundance, my mind's gonna accept more, I'm gonna get exactly clear on what that is, which I'm gonna teach you in a minute." "I'm only getting what I tolerate, and I'm only getting what I'm allowing to continue, and I'm not gonna allow this to continue anymore." By the way, here's what's great. Beliefs drive our life. These thoughts, these beliefs we have, drive our life. What's really crazy is, whether your belief is totally insane, or completely realistic, it's what your life will end up being about.

• 29:56Ed Mylett?

  I've watched people in my life dream and think incredibly insane things at the time about what will happen in their lives, and I'm telling you that eventually, your life becomes about those insane thoughts you have, good or bad. And so, you gotta get into a mindset of this. Are you gonna be somebody who's a scarcity thinker? Or an abundance thinker? Are you gonna think all the time about what's not there? What you don't have? What resources you're lacking? What things you don't have? What support you don't have? What people, what systems you don't have? Or are you gonna be an abundance thinker? And think about having abundance in your life? I believe you have a God who wants you to have an abundant, rich life. I also think that in my life, that abundance ought to be to glorify Him. But having said that, I meet people all the time, especially in religious circles, who are scarcity thinkers.

• 30:41Ed Mylett?

  They think about what they don't have. They think about small. And I don't believe you were put here to do something small in your life. You were put here to do something great with your life. We are successful in our lives to the extent we can shed our limiting beliefs. I come from really the harder families to succeed in. I actually am a believer that someone who comes from a very successful family, they have some negatives about that, but there's also resources, connections, etc. I also think when you come from a very poor family, you've got one of these situations where you know what you don't want. It's painful enough that you won't tolerate anymore. In fact, Malcolm X has this great saying where he said, "That which you do not hate, you will eventually tolerate." And so, one of the advantages of coming from poverty is you hate it. You don't want to be in it. You won't tolerate it anymore.

• 31:24Ed Mylett?

  One of the harder places to succeed from is actually the middle. Because it's not too painful, and yet you don't have examples of greatness around you either, or resources. I come from kind of a middle-class family. And so, I had to really work on shedding my limiting beliefs about being wealthy, about being successful. About anybody really caring what I had to say. About anybody wanting to follow me. Because I didn't have a situation that I hated I was moving away from. It was decent. But I didn't have examples and role models of greatness, nor did I have resources. Many of you listening to this can relate to that. You come from an okay place. You know, the great enemy of doing something extraordinary and great is doing something good. Or coming from a good place. If you're listening to this and things are good, you really need to listen. Because you're gonna have to work double hard to move out of good to get into great.

• 32:09Ed Mylett?

  So, we gotta shed our limiting beliefs. You gotta ask yourself, what are some of the things I believe that are limiting me? You know, about yourself, about your business that you're in? What are the limiting beliefs you have? They're probably not true. And by the way, even if they are- are true, it doesn't serve you to believe them. Remember, even having a crazy insane belief manifests itself eventually. So you choose what those beliefs are. You got this thing called a subconscious part of your mind. The subconscious mind is the prover. Let me say that to you again. The subconscious mind is the prover in your life. It's never been worded this way probably to you before. But it is going to try to prove you're correct all the time. Subconscious is your best friend if you use him right, or her. She is constantly trying to prove you right. So if you believe small things, scarce things,

• 32:52Ed Mylett?

  challenges, worries, fears, rejection, all that other stuff, your subconscious is going to prove you right. If you believe other beliefs, your subconscious will go to work on proving you right. That thought you have, that belief that opens a space, subconscious is going to go try to prove you right all the time. And it is correct every time. If you believe you're fat, subconscious mind will go to work on making sure you're fat. You believe you're rich, the subconscious will begin to work on taking advantage of every situation around. If you believe you're a taken advantage of person, the subconscious mind will prove you right. If you believe you're blessed, the subconscious mind will prove you right. So you choose. What are you? Are you blessed? Are you strong? Are you powerful? Are you a force for good? Are you relentless? Are you a giver? Are you a contributor?

• 33:33Ed Mylett?

  Or are you these negative things? People take advantage of you. You don't have what you need around you. You're out of shape. You're not all that powerful. Nobody cares about you. See, your subconscious is going to prove you right. It doesn't change reality. What the subconscious is, is a filter on your world. It's a filter. So what the subconscious does is, once you believe something, it filters out all of the things that would prove you wrong. And it will go to work on filtering in to your life, the things you will see and experience to prove you right. That's how powerful it is. It is a filter. When you believe you're going to build a big business and you're going to get a big team of people, or you're going to build massive income, the subconscious begins to filter out for you all of the things that would prove that not true.

• 34:15Ed Mylett?

  It's going to help you avoid seeing, literally circumstances, places and things that would prove that wrong. But if you believe, "Well, people don't want to follow me," your subconscious is going to go prove you right. It's going to bring to you, you're going to see people constantly who don't follow you. And you'll miss all the ones who would. The subconscious, if you believe for a minute that, "I'm going to be wealthy, I'm going to attract great people into my life," your subconscious goes to work on shedding all of the people out of the filter who wouldn't do well, who wouldn't respond well, and starts to filter in the people who will. That's how it works. You can have two people having dinner together at the same table. They could be in the same business. I've watched this happen. And they're sitting there at the same table, in the same business. One person believes, "I'm a great prospector, I'm a great recruiter." The other person doesn't.

• 34:59Ed Mylett?

  The other person believes finding good people's difficult, or you gotta get lucky. That's what they believe. Three tables down on the other side of the restaurant, there's a conversation happening, and that person is talking out loud about exactly what your product is, exactly what your service is, and how badly they need it. If you're in a business where you recruit people, let's say, for example, and they're talking about, "Man, I gotta get out of this job I've got. They're not paying me enough money, I don't get recognized, I want to do something on my own." You're both within ear distance, shouting distance of the same conversation, and I'm telling you, the person who believes they're going to attract great people, hears that conversation, and their mind filters out all the outside ambient noise in the room, and they hear it. And the person who believes you get lucky, or they don't attract people, never hears the same conversation. I've watched it happen over and over again.

• 35:44Ed Mylett?

  There's a part of your brain, I have it in another recording that I do, called the reticular activating system of your brain. And what it does is it basically keeps you sane. It sheds out everything in your life, it gets rid of everything in your life that's unimportant, so you can actually function. That's why you could breathe. That's why you don't feel the blood rushing through your left ear, you don't feel the hair on your head, or you don't see all the stimulus around you, you go crazy. What the reticular activating system does is it only finds for you that which is important to you. It's a function of the subconscious mind. And so, if you're looking for something with passion, with, I mean, even you single guys, you're looking for a beautiful girl, don't you notice every beautiful girl that's in a room? But you ever been with a guy who doesn't care about that? The same people can walk in there and they don't even notice him. I noticed that even with my son. My son is not yet quite hit puberty.

• 36:28Ed Mylett?

  And it can be the cutest little girl, three or four years older than him walk in a room. He can't notice anything because they're not on his radar yet. I know in three years when that same girl walks in the room, something tells me he'll notice her. Because it'll be a part of his subconscious mind that he's looking for it. I think you know exactly what I'm talking about. It's the same thing analogy. I have another CD where if you ever bought something. Let's say you bought a brand new car. You bought a brand new, white Honda. All of a sudden, isn't it amazing how you can be driving on the freeway and there are white Hondas everywhere? You see them everywhere. Were they never there before? Of course they were. But because you own one, because it's important to you, now you see all of them. They could be three lanes over, wrong side of the road, taking a right, turned down an alley. You see the white Honda, don't you? But they were there all the time.

• 37:11Ed Mylett?

  The reason you see them now is they're part of your subconscious and your reticular activating system. So that's how important focus is. That's how important beliefs are. People say, "Well, I don't know about all this personal development mumbo jumbo." Well, I do. I do. I know in baseball, a guy who thinks he can hit a curve ball and sees it over and over again, mashes curve balls. And I know a guy who thinks he can't hit one and avoid it, never hits one. I know that when you buy something new and it's out there, you see it everywhere and it was there all the time and you never saw it before. Because that system focuses it out for you. So this subconscious is a prover. You will experience that which you are deeply convinced of in life. I've watched this with powerful people that I know.

• 37:51Ed Mylett?

  My mother-in-law is one of the most incredible, strong women of faith you'll ever meet in your life. She prays every day, multiple times a day. Her husband was a lay minister, one of her sons is a pastor. Just an incredible, y'all probably know somebody like Patricia Lewis, my mother-in-law. She's just good. She's going to heaven. You know what I mean? And she is constantly looking for God's goodness in life. She points it out to me all the time. We'll be walking, she'll see something, "Oh, God is so good." Or she'll see, she'll notice someone helping someone I don't see at a grocery store. A man opening a door, "Isn't he a good man?" And she notices good things everywhere. Anything good that happens. She left the gym one day and I ran into her in the parking lot and she says, "Man, my legs felt great at the gym today." Says, "God's so good, he's keeping me healthy."

• 38:35Ed Mylett?

  I wouldn't even be thinking like that, right? But she notices constantly God's goodness in life. And so her life's abundant. She's got this positive belief. She goes through the same day you and I go through and she sees 3,000 good things. They were all there for me and you, but because it's not our root belief, we don't see them. I've also seen people the other way that think, oh, this is a negative, or people are stupid, or people are mean, or you name it, and they find it every day. And don't you know someone like that? You say, gosh, how do you see this stuff every? What is wrong with you? The truth is, their subconscious is proving them right. And here's what's worse. Beliefs are like a table. So, once you have the belief, it's like the top of the table.

• 39:17Ed Mylett?

  But then your brain goes, your subconscious goes and finds the first reference. So, for example, when Patricia thinks God's good, she's got this belief, it's the table. Then she sees the first example, and it puts a leg under the table. Then she sees another one later in the day. And then she makes this perfect meal, and that's God's goodness giving her that. And she gets all of these references, they become like legs under a table. They anchor it and becomes firmer and firmer and firmer, and harder and harder to break. And so, the more you believe something, your mind will find references for it and add legs to the table. And it becomes stronger and stronger and stronger. So, we really do experience what we're deeply convinced of. The subconscious, by the way, can't think for itself. It just draws to you what's congruent with your basic beliefs. It doesn't think for itself. It has no mind of its own.

• 40:02Ed Mylett?

  It's your mind. It draws to you what is congruent, consistent with what your deepest beliefs are. So, you gotta get through things like that. People say to me, well, how do I make that shift? Well, a lot of people go through life just hoping for things, don't they? They just hope things happen. But when you believe something deeply that you deserve it, that you've worked for it, or you're worthy of it, or maybe you have faith, hope is a beggar. Hope is a beggar. It begs for things in life. That never wins. Hope is not a strategy, okay? Faith leaps over things. Hope's a beggar. Faith leaps over things. You wanna conquer something, have faith, have belief, have conviction, have confidence. You want hope, you're gonna lose. You need faith. You need belief.

• 40:46Ed Mylett?

  Don't buy into the theory that you have no choice. For example, in business, I watch people say, boy, I've tried the business, or I've tried your business, or I've tried this business, and, you know, I've talked to millions of people and nothing happens. Really? Millions? Really?

• 41:01Ed Mylett?

  Let's really look at how many people you've talked to. See, most businesses, what I believe about my business, for example, is it works. And I know it works. I've proven it and I've watched thousands of people win. So I have no doubt, I have zero doubt, that the business I'm involved in is the greatest business model in the world. I know that. That's not just my opinion, although it is my opinion. I've seen facts bear this out. And one of the reasons is, is that I know that our business doesn't work the first time, or the first three times, or the first eight times. Most businesses require a large sample size to prove their worth. In my business, my belief is if you run a large enough sample size, you'll win. Now, if you run a small sample size, you talk to six, or 10, or 20, or 30 people, you've run the odds, the risk is you could lose.

• 41:44Ed Mylett?

  But if your business eventually talks to 300 people, or 400 people between you and your teammates, I have no doubt in my mind whatsoever that with a large enough sample size, you win. So, one of the beliefs I have in my business is, with a large enough sample size, with enough contacts, with enough experiences, you win. And that's why it's so important. There's a belief I have that talking to a lot of people, getting over this fear of rejection, believing you win, and talking to a lot of people does two things for you. I want you to hear me on this. Number one, this is big. Number one is that large sample size proves my business to win and probably would prove yours to win. Small sample size, you'd run the risk of losing. But large enough sample size with the right beliefs, you're gonna win, in my mind.

• 42:26Ed Mylett?

  The second thing is, there's a huge difference between knowledge and exposure. Huge difference. See, I've seen a lot of people with a lot of knowledge lose. I don't see people with a lot of exposure lose in my business. One of the reasons you want to get out there and get on a lot of appointments in my business, in our business, we do field training, and we do one-on-one appointments. The reason you want to get out on a lot of appointments is, one, the sample size increases, your chances of winning improves. But far more powerful than that is you get exposure. You get experience. You show me somebody with tons of exposure to something, and I will show you somebody who's gonna win. Go back to this NFL analogy. You see all the people all the time, they study film, study film, they have a lot of knowledge. They get to the NFL, getting out there is a whole different deal.

• 43:07Ed Mylett?

  You get out there with the big speed of an NFL football player, you see these rookie quarterbacks, all of a sudden it's a lot different. But you watch an NFL rookie, typically if they can get in three games, five games, 10 games, 12 games, maybe the second and third season, more and more exposure, things slow down, they get more belief. They believe they can perform better and they ultimately do. People with lots of exposure win, people with lots of knowledge don't. And so that's why large numbers matter in business, you're gonna get more exposure and more experience, and most importantly, you're gonna get tons of sample size to win as well. And you know what, as you go out and start your business, whatever it is you're in, if you're going to be starting a business, just so you know, let me let you know on the front end, people aren't gonna believe in you.

• 43:48Ed Mylett?

  So if you're addicted to other people's beliefs, or impressing other people, or other people's approval, you're gonna be out quickly. Because they're gonna reject you, they're gonna be jealous of you, they're gonna be haters, there's enough stuff out there now about haters and how that works, if you're gonna do anything great, you better know yourself it's right. You better go get a bunch of exposure quickly so that the business moves from your head to your heart, in my business, I know this. You get out and do 8, 10, 12, 15 appointments the first month in our business, you will love it. You'll see the goodness we do for people, you'll see the difference we make, and then what other people say can't rock your world because you now know. You're convicted, it's in your heart, not your head. See, knowledge is in our heads, exposure and experience moves to our heart. And all millionaires were laughed at, all billionaires were laughed at, let me just tell you that story, I was laughed at, I was rejected,

• 44:32Ed Mylett?

  I had family members ridicule me, I had people try to talk me out of the business, tell me go get a real job, why'd I go to college to do this? And they're all laughed at, and by the way, as many people as you think are laughing at you, there's more. Behind closed doors, when you're not there, they're still talking bad about you, so get over it. Even when you win, they're gonna talk bad about you. Heck, in my own company, people talk bad about me, they talk bad about everybody. Jealous people talk bad, I know that if people aren't talking about me, I'm not relevant. I don't care what they think. I care what I think. I care what God thinks. And so, all millionaires were laughed at. And persistence pays. These large numbers pay off. If you can take daily massive action, persistence pays and you gotta take daily massive action. That's progress. It's moving towards something.

• 45:14Ed Mylett?

  I want you to have a share of belief with you that I have. No problem is permanent. As long as you're taking massive action towards its resolution. I also think that any problem that comes up, this is a belief I'd like you to hold, there's always three options. I know no matter what people go through, whether it's a business problem or a life problem, sometimes it feels like there's no way out. I'm telling you that for every problem, there are three options. A minimum of three options. And so, whatever you're going through or when you go through it, go back to that belief. Share that one with me. That there are three options out of this problem. There are three places I could go. Write them down and begin to experience which one of those feels right to you. You know, and when we're going through problems, one of the things I want to challenge you, if emotions drive our lives, I think one of the most powerful emotions you can experience, maybe the most powerful, is gratitude.

• 45:58Ed Mylett?

  Is to be grateful. It's the antidote to almost all fears. It's the antidote to almost all pain. If you can begin to find things you're grateful for. My mother-in-law Patricia, I told you about her. She's just such a grateful woman. This is an emotional one for me, but I've known my father-in-law since I was a little boy. And I, since I was very little. And then I dated my now-wife, Christiana, through high school. And so, I've known him, you know, 35 years, something like that. And so, he was very close to me. Our families are very close and they had a love affair marriage. They were the kind of people when they were married. They, I'd walk in sometimes to pick up Christiana for a date and they'd be slow dancing in the living room. I'm not kidding you. They're just one of these, yeah, I'm telling you, they were just in love. And it was a beautiful relationship they had. And a couple of years back, Howard went in for a pretty minor thing in the hospital.

• 46:44Ed Mylett?

  And as Patricia was sitting there next to him, he was actually reading the directory for the church that week and watching the Bears game. So, as a man, he was doing, he was doing three of his favorite things. He was sitting there with his sweetheart. He was reading the directory from his church and he was watching football. And in that moment, he asked her to grab something. She looked down and he passed. He passed away there, sitting right with his sweetheart. And when he passed, you know how most people are just devastated when something, she was very sad for the loss. But I remember her telling me, she says, Ed, it was the same day. And she says, Ed, I'm just so grateful that he's in a better place now. I'm so happy for him. I'm so grateful that God took him without him going through a lot of pain. And I remember her just beginning to list for me all the things she was just grateful for. And I thought, what a powerful emotion, what a powerful thing to get through this.

• 47:29Ed Mylett?

  And I started to look at that, what are the things I'm grateful for? And I'm going to share with you a strategy a little bit later that I think is going to help you tremendously in that regard, but whenever you're going through something, take a pause and what am I grateful for right now in this moment? I'm grateful to be alive. I'm I'm grateful for my family. I'm grateful for this relationship. I'm grateful for this or that or another thing. Gratitude is the antidote to most pain in our life. And you've got to stop playing the game of victim. Okay, success is inside, not outside. Play the game of happiness and faith and abundance. Okay, in life, there's really only two things. There's your reasons for doing something and the results. Everything else is sort of BS, isn't it? There's your reasons for doing something and there's results and there's no waiting to win. There's no waiting. There's no preparing. There's no getting around and there's no excuses.

• 48:13Ed Mylett?

  If you're going to win, you've got to be a no excuse person. They just don't come out of your mouth. They just don't happen. They don't exist. There are not excuses. Because once you begin to make excuses for failing, you permit its existence. Once there's a reason why you're failing, you permit it to exist. You tolerate it. You pacify it. There are no excuses and there's no waiting. You show me two people, one person who's getting completely dialed in and prepared to do something. You show me another person who just throws themselves in and gets aggressive. I'll tell you the person that's going to win most time is the person who doesn't wait. And don't worry about events in your life. Worry in the Bible, Bible talks about worry being a sin, but I'll tell you a thing about worry that's such a difficult thing and I've struggled with worry. I'm the kind of guy, I'm so obsessed and focused and

• 48:56Ed Mylett?

  I always want to make sure I've thought through what could go wrong. And that's a negative thing because then my mind, it allows the space to open up where things could go wrong. But one of the horrible things about worry, most people listening should say, man, if I could stop worrying. You're never going to stop it, but when I begin to worry, I literally in my mind and sometimes I always say, stop it. Stop it. What am I grateful for right now? One of the horrible things about worry in our lives is it makes you live through an event that hasn't even happened yet. You think about if you worry about an event, right? There's some situation that's going to happen. You live through the event as if it happens emotionally. And most times, the ones we worry about don't happen or aren't as bad as the way we live it. Yet, we had to go through it and live it emotionally.

• 49:37Ed Mylett?

  That's one of the great detriments to worry is it forces you to live through a terrible circumstance that maybe won't even happen. Or won't happen to the extent that you believe it. So, don't do that. That's a process of rejecting yourself. Don't reject yourself. The great winners in life are their own biggest fans. They've got an embedded belief they deserve to win. They're worthy of it. The reason hard work and throwing yourself into work matters is not only do you get a larger pool of numbers to win by, but the other thing that happens, we only get out of life what we believe we deserve. Bad people are willing to go win when they don't deserve it. They'll steal, cheat, and move. But if you're a good person, you will only win and get what you think you deserve. Good people will never take more than they deserve.

• 50:22Ed Mylett?

  If there was a pizza we're all going to be eating right now, and there were 10 of us in the room, and there's 10 slices, a good person will only take one slice because that's what they deserve. Everybody else deserves their nine. A bad person will take two or three, won't they? Well, in business, you only take from the table that which you'll deserve. In life, you only take from the table that which you think you deserve. So, that's why hard work and outworking other people matters. The reason that matters is not only do you get a larger sample size, but what starts to happen when you're busting it, when you're getting up earlier, when you're making more phone calls, when you're seeing more people, when you're staying later, when you're working harder, something happens in your little subconscious mind, the prover. And what happens is your subconscious starts to go, "Wait a minute. I'm making more calls to those other people. I'm outworking those people. I deserve to win. I deserve better results than them."

• 51:06Ed Mylett?

  And then, your mind goes on to prove it. And so, that's the power of hard work. The power of hard work isn't just the numbers. The power of hard work is it changes our belief. If your person says, "Well, I want to change my belief. I can't just think myself into a new belief." One, that's a limiting belief and not true. But, two, I'll even let you accept that for a minute, but I promise you, if you go do 100 more calls or 100 more appointments than another person, you'll be done. You'll say, "I deserve more than them." And your belief of what you're worthy of changes. We only get what we believe we're worthy of. So that's why hard work matters. Don't ever reject yourself. Don't ever get down on yourself. There's enough other people that you can't please out there that are gonna talk bad about you. The last thing you need is the enemy inside. The enemy inside taking advantage of you. And that's you. Don't do that to yourself.

• 51:50Ed Mylett?

  You can't please everyone, so don't even try. I've tried it. You can't please everybody. I even had somebody the other day who's a very good friend of mine say to me, "You be careful. You're starting to try to please everybody." He even said to me, he said, "I'm not so sure, even though you talk about this all the time, Eddie, I'm not so sure you're not trying to get everybody happy and liking you. Maybe you need to revisit that." And I did. And I think maybe even me. I've trended lately into that place where I want everybody happy. I wanna please everybody. And it's physically impossible and it's exhausting. I need to please me. And if you have a relationship with God, you need to please God.

• 52:26Ed Mylett?

  There's a cast of your life. You know, your life is almost like a play. And what most people do is they live another person's script. See, most of these beliefs you have about yourself, you acquired them when you were defenseless. You acquired them when you were a little boy or a little girl and circumstances happened or parents parented you a certain way. Different events took place when you were young and they shape these internal beliefs that we have about ourselves when we're defenseless and young. And it's not till we're adults that these beliefs start to play themselves out. That's why it's so important to listen to something like this and say, "I gotta take an inventory. What do I really believe? And what would I like to believe? What beliefs would serve me? What are the things I need to believe about myself to have the life I ultimately want? Not the ones I got when I was five years old

• 53:10Ed Mylett?

  or eight years old or 11 years old or two years old or six weeks old that affected my subconscious. I'm an adult. I'm gonna take control of what I believe." And what most people do is they let other people write the script of their lives. Many of you are probably in a career that your mom or dad wanted for you. You went through school and you ended up doing something that mom or dad or someone else wanted. But if you were to choose, you'd be doing X, Y, or Z. If you could live your dream, you'd be here or there or another thing. Most people live a script that was handed to them at some point in their life. Or a script that was handed to them even later in life. Well, I got divorced, I went through this, so this is sort of what I do now. That's someone else's script. You write the script. That's what you were put here to do, is to do something great. You control the script of your life, not somebody else. You can change the script anytime you want. There can be a rewrite anytime you choose to.

• 53:54Ed Mylett?

  Our lives are like a play. There are a cast of characters in it. And you're the lead character. And you get to decide, listen to me, you get to decide what the script is. Are you gonna be the hero or the goat? Are you gonna be the person who gets stepped on? Or you can write the script. You can be the person, I'm the hero, I'm the contributor, I'm the giver, I'm the lead character. These other cast of characters are here to help me put this movie together, to put this play together. What happens is, once you know who the lead character is and what you want the script to look like, listen, listen, listen. Your subconscious mind and God go to work on attracting to you the rest of the cast. The rest of the set, the rest of the script. But you gotta take control of it.

• 54:37Ed Mylett?

  Most people just go through life with someone else's script and some character other people helped create. And you get to choose. You can start at any time. There's like eighty-six thousand four hundred seconds in a day. I think that's the right number. And that gives you eighty-six thousand four hundred chances to start over. At any point you choose to. You can do that. You can write a new lead character with a new script. And your mind will go to create a new cast around you. And in like most movies, when it's over, there are three or four main characters, aren't there? And then there was everybody else who's in the background you couldn't name. In your life, what matters is the main character, you. And these three or four main characters that'll be in the script of the movie of your whole life, that's who you worry about.

• 55:21Ed Mylett?

  You don't worry about this thousands of other people that are in the cast whose names nobody will ever remember. Most people live another script based on some other character people created, and they worry about the larger cast of thousands of faceless people and what they think. Rather than, a great life is somebody who says, "I'm the lead character, I'm the hero, I'm the heroine, I write the script, these are the three, four main characters that matter." These thousands of other people in the background who go nameless, who are, you know, cast member number three, blankety-blank number four, like you see at the end of a movie, I'm not worried about what they think, they're the main characters of someone else's movie, someone else's script. You gotta stop worrying about them. That's the cast of your life. By the way, right now,

• 56:04Ed Mylett?

  who's the main cast in your life? Picture their faces. There's probably two to four to five, maybe six people that are the main characters of your life. Picture their faces right now. If it's your children, or your grandchildren, or your spouse, or a mom or a dad, or, just picture their faces for a second. Who the main characters of your life? How much do you love them? Who do you want to appear as in their life? Who do you want them, when your life is over, to say, "This was who my dad was, this was who my mom was, this is who my son was, this is who my daughter was?" And they begin to explain your character. Is it Academy Award worthy? Or is it just like an also-ran character people forget? Were you put here to be one of these people who just passed through the world and no

• 56:47Ed Mylett?

  one really remembers? Or are you one of these people that eternity will remember? And by the way, I'm not talking about being famous, I'm talking about just making a difference. I think if you affect one other life, you are a worthy character. If you help one other person change their life, well then it's worth it. And so you decide who that character is, and do it for the main cast, do it for the three or four main people in your cast. Don't worry about it, and even that main cast may question you at first, and that's okay. The way the adversary tries to get after us, if you believe in that stuff, is they try to attack us with the people we love the most, who reject us. When I started in the business, I could tell you that my parents were not real sure about this thing. In fact, many times questioned me about it. They're some of the main characters of my life. Even Kristiana, there was a few times in the very beginning where she wasn't so

• 57:30Ed Mylett?

  sure this was right for us. And those experiences made me stronger, those events happened for me, not to me. Let me explain to you why. I was doubting it too. But when I was challenged by Christian or challenged by parents, I was forced into a situation to defend what I was doing. And in the process of defending it to them, even though I didn't even believe all of it, I became stronger and more convicted of my beliefs just by saying them to them. So those rejections, those inquisitions by them, happened for me, not to me, and made me stronger. In hindsight, they were great. Okay? Now, by and large, we get what we expect. So you gotta raise what you expect from yourself. Let me give you a challenge here. Begin to raise your standards for yourself. Raise what you demand from yourself. Raise your standards, and this is sound controversial.

• 58:15Ed Mylett?

  Inside, lower what you expect from others. Raise what you expect from yourself and inside, I'm not saying as a leader, don't demand high standards. What I'm saying is, inside, you raise what you expect from you. You raise the performance you expect from you. You hold yourself to an even higher standard, but you expect lower things from other people. Because other people will always perform less than you expect them to, and if you begin to depend on other people in your business for your success, you are ultimately in that dependency state again and could lose. Depend on you. Depend on your performance. And whatever they deliver is a bonus. So life's not about that. Another thing is this, I'll say this to you. I meet people all the time, say, "Hey, man, this is great. You know, I went through this, or I'm overcoming that, or I did this, or I struggled here, or this, or that." Life is not about overcoming and struggling. That's a flawed model of the world. I meet people all the time, say, "Hey, man."

• 59:00Ed Mylett?

  I say, "How are you doing?" "Hey, man, just fighting the good fight. You know, another day, another dollar. Battling through something." That's a flawed mindset. If you believe you're constantly struggling through things, or battling through things, your mind will constantly attract struggles and battles to you. You'll, all your life, you'll be overcoming things. All your life, you'll be stepping over obstacles. That's not what life's about. Think through that. Many of you have that mindset where you think, "I'm battling. It's a struggle. I got this." Well, guess what? You've manifested that in your life because that's your flawed mindset. You probably raised from somebody who thought that way too. I'll tell you what champions think. Life's not about overcoming or struggling. Life's about growing, learning, contributing, happiness, faith, achievement, progress, winning, peace. That's what life's about.

• 59:44Ed Mylett?

  I'm not overcoming anything. Things are happening for me. I'm about winning. I'm about peace. I'm about contributing. I'm about getting it done. You can't have this flawed life model where you believe you're constantly overcoming something or battling something. That's not how it works. By the way, don't endure your life. Enjoy it. Life's not about enduring your life. Life's about enjoying your life. It's about being happy. It's about contributing and finding out what makes you happy and then doing it over and over and over and over again is the key to a happy life.

• 1:00:19Ed Mylett?

  So, let's talk for a little bit about what makes us happy. Number one, set some goals. Everybody says it, set goals, set goals, set goals. Well, the first thing I want to challenge with you is set goals as if you possess them. Meaning, people say, "Well, I want to get skinny." No, that's not right. I think a goal needs to be, "I will weigh 185 pounds." Or, "I want to get rich." No, "I will acquire a million dollars by June 10th, 2015." Be specific. Specificity to goals and not generalities. Very specific. Your mind can't go to work on filling in a general picture. "I want to be rich. I want to be happy." Nope. Define it specifically. Your mind goes to work as a precise model when you're specific with it. If you're in a business where you produce sales, "I want to do a lot of sales next month." No, "I want to do 15 sales." Okay?

• 1:01:04Ed Mylett?

  Or, "I will do 15 sales next month." "I will have 15 sales by October 1st, 2015." Whatever that is. There's a scripture that I like that I want to share with you and it's Romans 4:17 and it says, "I have had made thee a father of many nations before him whom he believed, even God who quicketh the dead and collers those things which be not as though they were." See? You can call things as if they are yours now. There's proof of that in everybody's life. We move towards what we picture and we attract what we feel worthy of. And so, you've got to believe you deserve it and you've got to have a specific goal of what it is. So, I would challenge you begin to write through the specific things you want. If you were to look at my goals, they probably bore you, but they're very specific.

• 1:01:48Ed Mylett?

  "I will acquire X amount of money. I will help this many people." I will, and it's a specific, it almost looks like a to-do list, my goals. But flaw of all goal-setting, and you should read your goals out loud, I believe in that. I believe in the power of saying it out loud. It reinforces the picture. When you're reading your goals, picture them as if you have them. It creates a picture in the subconscious. conscious that it goes to work on filling in. So when I read something, if I was to say, I'm gonna weigh 185 pounds and be ripped and muscular. As I'm saying it, I'm picturing that body. If I'm gonna acquire a million dollars, I'm picturing that bank account statement, or I'm picturing what that would mean. So as you begin to picture something, the mind goes to work. The more specific it can be, and the more it's visual, the more your brain goes to work on it. The biggest mistake people make when they set up goals, though, is they don't have the juice behind it. They don't have the driver.

• 1:02:33Ed Mylett?

  Goals, for the most part, without reasons, are impotent. They're dead. You just have stuff you want to do written down. What gets us to do something in any endeavor is emotion. Sometimes in business, I even hear people say, well, I don't want to be too emotional in business. Really, everything's about emotion. Even being cool and calm is an emotion. And so, of course, there's emotion in business. Now, I don't believe in motivation necessarily, because I think motivation moves you towards motives, low-level stuff. I believe in inspiration, which is more of a spiritual way to move towards something. It's a much more powerful and enduring way to move towards something. We want goals that pull us, not push us. Inspiration pulls us. We want to have things that pull us, that compel us, that grab our heart, that grab our attention.

• 1:03:16Ed Mylett?

  And the way we get ourselves to have that pull power is with deep emotional reasons that we write down next to the goals that we read also. You show me somebody who wants to be in, say, great health, for example, and they've got deep emotional reasons for it. I'll show you somebody a thousand times, maybe 70,000 times, more likely to achieve the goal. You give me two people with the same goal, one person with massive emotional reasons, somebody who just wrote it down. Who do you think's gonna win? Who's gonna overcome objections? Who's gonna plow through rejection? Who's gonna keep fighting? Who's gonna run the larger numbers? Who's gonna believe they're worthy of it? The person with the reasons. What gets us up out of bed in the morning are our reasons, not our goals. Our goals don't get us up, our reasons for having them. Reasons are usually people and emotions.

• 1:04:00Ed Mylett?

  Let me give you an example about that in my own life. I have an uncle who died at 50 years old of a heart attack. For some reason, when I was at his funeral, he was one of those family members I kind of resembled. I don't know if you have someone in your family that you kind of look like. In my family, he was my godfather, and he was my dad's only brother, and I looked like him. People used to say that I reminded them of him. So when we were at his funeral, it was a very sad thing. Father of a young family, a great family, and all the children have turned out wonderfully. But as a 50-year-old man had passed away, so it was a very sad thing. Something came over me, though, at the funeral where I thought, you know, I was 30 at the time. You know, I should probably get my heart checked. You know, I look like him, obviously runs in the family. When we get back, I think I'll go get checked. It's interesting how the reticular activating system in the brain works.

• 1:04:44Ed Mylett?

  So now I'm flying back, the actual flight back to California from Boston with my wife. And I'm listening to music and up on the TV, the Oprah Winfrey show's on and I'm listening to music. I'm not really looking, but all of a sudden, my mind keeps catching this TV screen because they keep showing a heart on it. Did you hear what I just said? They're showing a heart on it. All of a sudden, hearts became important to me. Three weeks before, that same show would have been on, I would have looked at it and looked away. But now my reticular activating system has made hearts important to me and I noticed the show. Is that incredible? How much the brain works that way when something becomes important, it finds it. As we talked about earlier. I immediately unplug my music and I plug my headset into the airplane's audio system and I listen to the show. And she was discussing this new exam they had where they can scan, now they're very common, but

• 1:05:28Ed Mylett?

  they can scan your heart for plaques in the arteries. I thought, well, gosh, that's incredible. So I ended up writing it down and ended up scheduling an appointment when I got back to LA with this specific scan she had on the show. It's pretty incredible that I noticed it because of the reticular activating system. Immediately, my mind went to work on finding resources to deliver to me this space I had opened in my mind. That's how it works, everybody. So I go and I do the exam and after the lunch, you do the exam and then you go take a lunch break. You come back and meet with the doctor and he reviews it with you. And of course, I went out and had a burrito at lunch, which is great for somebody with a, with a heart issue. And I come back and thank God that the doctor was somebody who understood moving people and getting them to have reasons and didn't just deliver information. What this doctor could have done is just sat me down like an average doctor would do, an average business person, and just present information to me.

• 1:06:13Ed Mylett?

  Ed, here's your scan, here's the issues, here's what you gotta do, here's the prescription, goodbye. That's what most people do in business too, don't they? They get down, here's our presentation, here's what we can do for you, and here's the proposal. And they wonder why people don't do business. When people do business, because you feel an emotional need. People get recruited or bought into businesses because you feel a need that's emotionally in them. And so what he did is he was smart. He walks in and he sits me down and we begin to visit for a minute and he says, hey, so the ladies up front told me that you're kind of a successful young man and this was when I was about 30 and I said, well, thank you very much. He goes, you probably live in a big house, huh? And I said, I live in a decent sized home, sir, yes. And he still doesn't show me the lab work, the scan either. And he says, okay, um, he goes, let me ask you a question. You got kids?

• 1:06:56Ed Mylett?

  I said, yeah, I've got a, I've got a little boy and my wife's pregnant with my daughter who'll be born here in a few months. And he says, that's great. He says, uh, that daughter, I bet she's gonna be special to you. I said, yes, sir, she will be. He goes, um, do you want to walk her down the aisle on her wedding day? You don't say that to a dad, do you, fellas? I said, uh, well, of course, yes, sir. He goes, I want you to listen to me very carefully, son. You continue down the path you're going with your diet and your exercise, some other man's gonna walk her down the aisle on that wedding day. You'll be long gone. Whoa! You think he got my attention there? You think that's a emotional engagement? I said, oh, okay. Uh, he says, let me, about your son? He goes, is he a good boy? I said, yeah, he's smart. He's doing well already. He says, you want to be there when he graduates high school? I said, you betcha. Wouldn't that be a great day?

• 1:07:41Ed Mylett?

  He says, uh, you won't be there. Someone else will be there. And he says, and by the way, just for the record, I bet this big house you got, how'd you feel about some other guy having breakfast every morning with your kids, married to your wife now, cause you've been gone? Probably the guy will walk her down the aisle and probably the guy will be there at graduation. And I'm sitting there getting mad. I says, well, hold on a minute. What's in that dad gum scan? I want to know, right? What did he do? He built up all my reasons before he gave me the diagnosis and the prescription to fix it. Cause it's not just the information, it's the emotion. So I'm sitting there going, I want to be there for this daughter I don't even have yet. I want to be there for my family and I certainly don't want some other guy running around my house married to my wife. And so he says now, Let me give you the good news.

• 1:08:23Ed Mylett?

  If you do exactly what I'm gonna tell you with your diet and some of the medications you're gonna be taking, you'll be there for her wedding day. You'll be there at graduation. And I'm sure you'll be married to your wife, living in a great place. I said, "Well, give it to me." Right? And he immediately told me what I needed to do with my weight loss and my diet and my nutrition and some medications, etc. And you know what? I didn't leave there with any doubt in my mind I was gonna do every single one because he gave me massive reasons. My goals was to get to 185. But my reasons was my daughter's wedding. And so every morning, some mornings when I got up and I didn't really wanna go to the gym, you know what would get me up? Not some goal written on the page, but the emotion of making sure someday I was at Bella's wedding. Reasons is what moves us. Reasons are what engage us. And thank God I had a brilliant doctor who understood reasons.

• 1:09:08Ed Mylett?

  And so that's the same for you. Whatever it is you want, you attach emotional enough reasons to it, you'll do whatever it takes. And since that day now, it's been 13 years later, there have been very few days where I was supposed to work out that I haven't worked out, and very few days that I haven't taken the medication or done the nutritional program that I was on because I have reasons to do it. It's given me longevity, it's given me focus, and it's made it easy. I don't need discipline to make my goals happen. I need reasons. And so do you. And then the third thing you need with goals, you gotta write out a detailed plan of how you're gonna do it. You have to have the goal, you have to have the reasons, and then the plan of how to do it. So, I had the goal, which is to get my weight to 185. There are many other things. I had the reasons, which was my daughter's wedding and being in my own house with my family and not gone. And then third, he gave me the plan. Didn't he?

• 1:09:53Ed Mylett?

  That's how I've stayed healthy. And that's how your business will stay healthy. That's how your life will stay healthy. That's how every part of your life. That same formula, I learned it from them, and I've applied it to this day. So, vision, have a vision that creates something that excites you, that's compelling, that pulls you. Have it followed up with emotional intensity and review it every day. They say now, "Why is 70,000 times more powerful than how." Is that incredible? 70,000 times more powerful than how? And goals are not promises, they're commitments. And so have them written down and make a real decision. Okay, the next thing I want you to do is, you have to make a real decision if you're gonna change your life. How do you know if you've made a real decision? Once you say, "I'm gonna weigh 185," or "I'm gonna get 10 recruits this month," or "I'm gonna write five sales," or whatever it is, how do you know you made a real decision? You've made a real decision if you've immediately taken an action.

• 1:10:38Ed Mylett?

  A real decision is proved by immediate action. If it's not a real decision, it was just a passing thought. So, the minute you decide something, take a quick action. If it's, "I'm gonna get 10 recruits this month," then immediately make one phone call. The only way to change your life is to make real decisions. And I'll tell you that there are two major decisions that I think you need to make, right now. The first one is why, and the second one is your detailed plan how. Third, raise your standards, okay? And the last thing I want to tell you is, we cannot sustain the image or a goal in our mind that's not consistent with our beliefs about ourselves, or our limitations. So, when you got these goals, you've got these reasons, you've got this plan, now you're going to work on your belief you can do it. Your belief you can make that happen. Your belief that you're power enough to make it happen. And have somebody to be accountable to.

• 1:11:21Ed Mylett?

  Whether that's a mentor, or a role model, or even if it's God. But account to somebody, so you got someone to answer to. And you must know what you want clearly before you can ever become aware of how to get it. If I didn't know what I wanted that day with my heart, which is to get healthy and to get those plaques under control, I could have never gone to get it, okay? And so, don't have inputting goals, have real goals. Number seven, once you're clear, there are vast resources. And I think you'll find out in life that they begin to appear to you. There are people, places, things, circumstances. I mean, think about whatever. I know in my business, everybody's got access to the same system. Everybody's got access to the same marketing materials, the same products, the same compensation plan. Why do some people win and some people lose? The people that win are doing the things I'm describing, the people that lose don't.

• 1:12:04Ed Mylett?

  And you know, one thing you gotta do as yourself is you gotta stop separating from yourself the fact that who you are is not what you have or what you've done. Who you are is totally different than what you've done in the past, or what you have. You aren't what you've done, you aren't what you have. You're who you really are, and they're two different things. And who you are is gonna change what you have and what you've done. The other thing I want to recommend you do is you begin to have affirmations. Affirmations are just things you say to yourself out loud, daily, that reinforce these new beliefs about yourself. What they do is they create... ...repeatable imagery in your mind and emotion. So, use a little bit of this, for example. I mean, I don't care what your affirmations are. They can be, whatever you want to say to them. You can say, "I'm a great prospector and recruiter." One of the things I say, "I'm an athlete, a peak performance athlete." One of the reasons I say that out loud every day is, how would an athlete eat?

• 1:12:49Ed Mylett?

  How would an athlete perform? If you really believe you're an athlete, would you be eating McDonald's all day long? Would you be eating fast food? No, athletes don't do that. You could say, "My expertise allows me to be competent in my career. I quickly and easily discovers people's needs. I bring out the best in people. I have powerful energy that people want to follow. I'm in charge of my destiny. I create my own experience. I am courageous and love taking risks. I love uncertainty. I love to prospect. I am one of the great prospectors of all time." Whatever it is, there's hundreds of them. I allow myself to make mistakes and learn from them. Rejection is progress. Whatever you want to say, you begin to read these out loud every day. They begin to reinforce things to you. And then, one last thing I want to share with you on this is the idea of rituals.

• 1:13:34Ed Mylett?

  We really are what we do. We really manifest in our lives, not just what we think. What we think is what causes us to act, and how we act produces results. So, there's the thinking and the beliefs and all that, and then there is the actual actions we take. And actions are rituals. Things we do repeatable every single day are what make a difference in our lives. What we do consistently, over and over, is what produces our results. Now, what we do is dependent on how we think. It's what gives us the freedom to act. But rituals, or what you would call habits, are what drive our lives. And they're powerful, and they're unconscious. In fact, Duke in 2006 did a study. It said, "40% of the actions people perform daily aren't even actual decisions, but they're habits." Think about that for a second.

• 1:14:17Ed Mylett?

  40% of everything we do, we don't even think about? It's habitual? It's scary and impressive at the same time, isn't it? But that's what Duke said. This ritual thing, this habit thing, is a mind-blowing experience. They now know more and more and more how habits work. And I'll tell you, it is, it's an amazing, amazing thing. I'll read something to you. The process in which the brain converts a sequence of actions into automatic routine, which is known as chunking, is how habits are formed. These are dozens, if not hundreds, of behavioral chunks that we rely on every day. Some are simple. You automatically put toothpaste on your toothbrush before sticking it in your mouth, don't you? Some, such as getting dressed or making the kids lunch, are a little bit more complex.

• 1:15:00Ed Mylett?

  This is from a book that I just finished reading called The Power of Habit. I want to give credit to Charles Dweig, the author of the book, and he talks about how incredibly powerful habits are, and I challenge you to get the book and read it. I want to give him a shout out and a chance to have you acquire the book. I think it'll blow your mind, but one of the things he talks about in the book that just is incredible, they actually know the part of the brain now where habits are stored. It's in the basal ganglia part of your brain, and the front part of your brain is where you store habits and things you do over and over again. And you gotta think about it. You're very habitual. You do a whole bunch of stuff you don't think about. I'll make a bet. For example, he's talking about toothpaste there. I'll bet you that when you get up in the morning and you go get ready, that almost every single day, you do the same sequence of things. If they're men, they shave before they brush their teeth, but they usually don't do it reverse every day.

• 1:15:45Ed Mylett?

  They either brush their teeth first or shave. When you get into the shower and you grab the soap, believe it or not, you probably soap the exact same part of your body in the exact same sequence without thinking about it every single day. Is that not incredible? You're not thinking about that, but when you get up in the morning, what's the first thing you do? Maybe you hit your knees and pray. Then you go get a cup of coffee, and then you brush your teeth, and then you shave. I don't know what you do every single day, but I know this, it's the same every day, and you don't have to think about it because it's a habit. It's something you've done over and over and over again. This book will talk to you about, more specifically, how to form new habits. But here's how powerful habits can be. He studies this guy in the book named Eugene, and I'll mess this up a little bit, but the summary of it is Eugene was a guy who ended up with a brain disease where it ended up functioning his brain like Alzheimer's, where he lost almost all memory in his brain. He had nothing in his brain that he could remember.

• 1:16:30Ed Mylett?

  He couldn't remember who his kids were. He couldn't remember the names of people that were around him. And when you would sit in his living room and you'd say, "Hey Eugene, can you draw me the house here and how to get to the bathroom?" And he could not tell you how he gets to the bathroom or where the bathroom was in his house. Yet, when he needed to use the bathroom, he could get up, walk, take a left turn and find the bathroom. He couldn't explain it to you consciously, but he could get there. And it fascinated the author of the book and the studies, how does he know how to do that? It's because habits happen on a cue. So when a cue happens, it pulls the habit part out of your brain. The cue habit, like when you wake up in the morning, boom, you wake up, boom. That cue signals you to go in habit mode. Put the toothpaste here, shave there, soap there, blah, blah, blah. And you move into habit mode without having to think.

• 1:17:15Ed Mylett?

  These are powerful and they can be destructive at the same time. If your habit in business isn't serving you, if it's not get to the office, boom, pick up the phone, make 20 calls. If it's to get to the office, walk around, say hello to everybody, check email, do completely useless things, then you lose. The person with the best rituals or habits wins. So they studied this guy Eugene. One day, they tell me, so you need to keep an eye on him because he doesn't remember where he lives, he can't even draw a map of the house. Well, one day, his wife went into the other room and she leaves, he comes out, Eugene's gone. She can't find him. Panics, that's it. Can you imagine? It's like an Alzheimer's patient, he's gone. And she knows that he has no idea how to get home. He can't draw a map of their own house or where the bathroom is, never mind get home. She goes searching all over town, can't find him, can't find him.

• 1:17:59Ed Mylett?

  She's in tears, she comes home and he's sitting in the living room. She says, Eugene, where did you go? He didn't know. Well, how did you get home? He had no idea how he got home. And it fascinated her. A few days later, the same thing happened. He left and came back hours later. But he couldn't tell her where he'd been, he couldn't remember, and he had no idea how he got home, and he couldn't draw it. So finally, one day, the researchers came over and let him leave and followed him. And they followed him many, many blocks away, and then finally, they grabbed Eugene and said, Eugene, let's go home. Do you know how to get home? And Eugene said, I, I don't know how to get home. Do you know what your house looks like? He had no idea. He said, "Well, can you draw me a map to get there?" No clue.

• 1:18:44Ed Mylett?

  And then Eugene started to walk home. He looked at a stop sign and took a right. When he saw that stop sign, out of his basal ganglia in his mind, it pulled out the habit of turning right at the stop sign. And then when he got a little bit closer to a mailbox, he knew, "Oh, this is where I go, left at the mailbox." And he walked straight home and into the front door into the living room. And when they got there, he still couldn't tell them how they got there. What it was is that along the walk home, there were cues that pulled out a habit in his mind. The cue stimulates the habit, whether it be the stop sign, or a mailbox, or a car in a parked driveway, he could find his way home based on these habitual cues. You have them all over the place in your life that cue you to go into habit mode. The key thing is starting to be conscious of what those habits are.

• 1:19:28Ed Mylett?

  From a work standpoint, what are your habits when you get into the office? What are the cues that get you to move? What are the new cues you need to get you to form new habits? And you'll find that these habits drive everything in our life. We are our rituals. We change our rituals and our habits. We change the outside results that we get. Take control of your habits. I'd recommend this book on how to form new ones. It'd be longer than this is required here, and I want her to be able to be the one to teach you, or Charles to be the one to be able to teach you. But I will tell you, this is everything. Most people have no idea what their capacity is if they could take control of their habits. Your capacity, by the way, when you focus on one thing, one endeavor, one focus, one area of your life you want to improve is massive. Human beings have an incredible capacity. Once they decide, "I'm changing this area of my life," and they focus on it completely

• 1:20:10Ed Mylett?

  with beliefs, and goals, and reasons, and new habits, you have a massive capacity to have change and master an area of your life. It's never, ever a challenge when someone decides to do that. They can fix it. And it's all about what I call identity. It's about our belief we can do it. In my other CD, I talk about the fact that identity is like a big thermostat in your life. If you walk into any room, there's a thermostat in the wall. It's set at a certain temperature. And in our lives, our identity, our beliefs about ourselves, what we believe we're worth, is that thermostat in our lives. And so, if you walk into a room and it's set at 76 degrees, the whole room's at 76 degrees. And if it gets a little bit hotter, the thermostat kicks on and cools it back to 76. If it gets a little bit cooler, the heater kicks on and gets it back to 76 degrees.

• 1:20:52Ed Mylett?

  And our lives, our identity, what we believe about ourselves, are the thermostat that govern everything in our life. So if you believe about yourself, "I'm about an 80 degree-er. I deserve about 80 degrees worth of results." That sets the temperature of your life. And no matter what you do, no matter how you act, no matter what you behave, if life starts to get pretty good and your income starts to go up, or you're a little bit happier, your weight loss has happened, and you don't change what you believe about yourself. You just take actions. You don't change what you really believe you're worth. You ever seen someone lose weight and gain it back? Or make some money and lose it? Or build a team and it shrinks? Or get a few sales and go back to normal? It's because they didn't change their identity. You can never exceed your identity. The most powerful force in the world is to be consistent

• 1:21:37Ed Mylett?

  with what you believe about your identity. And so, if you don't change that, what happens is business starts to get pretty good, you'll turn the air conditioners on of your business life unconsciously. You will. And all of a sudden, you'll cool things back down to about where they were before. Conversely, if things start to go pretty bad and you can't pay a bill, or your income's lower than it should be, you'll heat things back up again to get them back up. Humans always get what they think their thermostat's set at. They always get their identity. That's why you see people who lose a bunch of weight, and then all of a sudden, you see them three months later, and they're kind of back down to about where they were before. They can't even explain to you what happened. All of a sudden, they got really busy one day and had to have McDonald's, or the car broke down, so they couldn't go to the gym for three days. They think all of that is circumstantial, but it's not. It's your mind going to work on delivering for you exactly what you think you're worth.

• 1:22:20Ed Mylett?

  It's never circumstantial. It's never by chance. It's never by mistake. It's always by your identity. So the key in our life is changing what we believe we're worth. If you can get that thermostat to begin to believe you're worth 95 degrees of fitness, or 95 degrees of happiness, or 95 degrees of wealth, or 110 or 120, as you move up that thermostat, you will attract to yourself the habits, the behaviors, etc. that deliver that within a certain range for you. It's the governor of our lives. How do we change it? Two big ways we change it. One, associations. If you're an 80 degree-er, and you run around with people that are 120, 140 degrees, you can't help but heat up your thermostat to being around them. The other way is you do a massive amount of work in a short period of time. This alters the thermostat. It alters the temperature of our lives because we believe we're worth more than we used to be

• 1:23:05Ed Mylett?

  because we've done things we'd never done before. Okay. Last couple of things I want to share with you. Is asking yourself the right questions, we talked about this in the beginning and I told you that we begin to attract to ourselves who we think we are, as the thermostat goes. One of the things that Anthony Robbins taught me years and years ago, and I want to share these with you, is these questions that I ask myself. I told you in the beginning, thinking is about asking and answering questions. And Tony shared with many of us years ago, the power of asking yourself the right questions to start your day and end it. And so this is from Tony Robbins, and I want to give my good friend Tony credit for this. But Tony recommends that you ask yourself seven powerful questions in the morning. And I would say by and large, 90 some odd percent of the days that I learned this 25 years ago since, I've done this. And it helps control my thinking. It helps me know I'm

• 1:23:50Ed Mylett?

  in charge. It helps me know, feel blessed. It gives me gratitude. So these are the questions that Tony recommends that I actually do when I wake up in the morning. Number one, what am I happy about in my life right now? What about that makes me happy? How does it make me feel? Just ask yourself in the morning that. Two, what am I excited about in my life right now? What about that makes me excited? How's it make me feel? So I've started my day out with two powerful questions. What am I most happy about? What am I excited about? Third thing, what am I proud of in my life right now? What about it makes me proud? How does that make me feel? Number four, what am I grateful for in my life right now? What about that makes me grateful? How does that make me feel? What am I enjoying

• 1:24:33Ed Mylett?

  most in my life right now? What about that do I enjoy? How does it make me feel? Number six, what am I committed to in my life right now? What about that makes me committed? How does it make me feel? Seven, last one, who do I love? Who loves me? What about that makes me loving? How does that make me feel? What about every day, when most people roll out of bed, the first thing that goes to their mind? Worry. What do I have to do today? What am I worried about today? What do I have to overcome? They literally start their day in a negative mindset the first 20 seconds they're awake. Well, what if you could roll over and wake up? Whether you go into a prayer, or a thought, or whatever it is. But at the end of that, you start the day by programming your mind to be thinking the right thoughts,

• 1:25:17Ed Mylett?

  the happy thoughts, the winner's thoughts. Because the quality of our lives are our emotions, and we know that that has to do with our thoughts. So if you started every day asking yourself what you're happy about, what you're excited about, and you say it, what you're proud of, what you're grateful for, what you're enjoying the most, what you're committed to, and who do you love, and who loves you. You started your day right. You've started moving in the right direction before you've left the bed. And I've tried to do that for years, and it made a massive, massive difference. I was the kind of guy who woke up worried, woke up stressed, woke up tired. And it's made a huge difference. And then in the evening, three powerful questions before you go to bed. When, so when you go to sleep at night, before you hit the pillow. What have I given today? In what ways have I been a giver today? Two, what did I learn today?

• 1:25:59Ed Mylett?

  Three, how has today added to the quality of my life? How can I use today as an investment in my future? And these are the questions that I ask. Imagine you go to bed every night, say, "Man, what did I give today? In what ways have I been a giver? What did I learn today? And how has today added to the quality of my life?" See, guys, what starts to happen when you ask these questions? Is that your mind begins to anticipate you asking yourself this, and all day long, it tries to find more of it. It tries to find more about what you're happy, more of what you're excited about, more of what you're proud of, more of what you're grateful for, more of what you're enjoying, more things to be committed to, more things to love and people to love. It, it, it helps you find more things to give, more things to learn. And how your life has higher quality.

• 1:26:41Ed Mylett?

  Your mind begins when it's a pattern, when this is your habit, when this is your ritual, your mind begins to dominate and think this way over and over again. And all day long, your mind is finding the answers to these questions it knows you're gonna ask yourself that night, or the next morning. It's a wonderful, wonderful thing, and you'll see your dreams will change too. You begin to dream about different things, and think about different things as well. The last couple of things I want to share with you is this. Get your uniform dirty. When I played baseball, one of the things that the coaches always say is get dirty, get dirty. What that means is you gotta bust it. All this thinking is great, all of the getting in place, the right mental imagery and the goals and the abundance and thinking straight and all that's awesome, but you then you just gotta get dirty, you gotta do the dirty, dirty. You gotta make the most calls, you gotta see the most people, you gotta bust it, you

• 1:27:26Ed Mylett?

  gotta outwork everybody because that's at the end of the day what wins. The people that win are the most confident because they've done the most work. And the ones who do the most work are the most confident. It's a self fulfilling prophecy, it's a loop that never ends. You show me someone who's taken thousands and thousands of thousands of batting practice, they're gonna have more confidence than someone who's taken two. It's just a big difference. And so I want to challenge you to do that because at the end of the day, we don't attract what we want. We don't attract what we'd like. We attract who we are. We attract into our lives, people, circumstances, places and things, you name it, that are who we are. We attract to our businesses who we are. You want to have a great leader in your business, be one and you'll attract one. And be a contributor, be someone who gives and gives and gives and gives. There's one of the challenges of the United States, there was this great survey just came out.

• 1:28:12Ed Mylett?

  They surveyed a large group of children in India. The question was very simple to these kids in India, what is it you want to grow up to be? They're 10 years old, what is your goal when you grow up? What do you want to be? And the number one answer in India was a software engineer. These were 10 year old kids already focused on doing something great with your life. The same question was asked to the 10 year olds in the United States, what do you want to be when you grow up? The number one answer, famous.

• 1:28:38Ed Mylett?

  Famous. We live in a culture today that is so dependent upon what other people think about us. And the selfies and the pictures and the this, this, the, what other people think, it's an obsessive culture. It actually makes it much easier to win. Technology has fed most people's fears and weaknesses even to a greater extent. So those of us that are about winning, contributing, making a difference, standing for something, concerned about what we think, concerned about what our God thinks, concerned about doing something great, are a smaller and smaller group. Because there's so many people that just want to be known or liked or famous or not rejected. I think that was a telling story about the United States. The decisions we make, not the conditions of our life, shape our destiny.

• 1:29:22Ed Mylett?

  You can make a decision to be a new you, to write a new script, to be a new character, to develop new beliefs, to develop new habits, to change the thermostat. You can make a decision to get your uniform dirty. You can make a decision to be concerned about what you think and not what others think. And there's a format to be happy. Format in life is very simple if you want to be happy. It's when your life conditions that you're living meet your blueprint or your expectations of your life. When you have high expectations and blueprint for your life and the conditions end up matching that, you're happy. And when you don't have that, you'll be unhappy. So it's about making something great happen in your life. You change your emotions, you change your life. As a friend, let me finish by saying this. I hope this has helped you. This is clearly one of these things you have to listen to over and over and over again.

• 1:30:06Ed Mylett?

  But if I could say one thing to you is this. Be good to yourself. You deserve it. You were born to do something great. There are seeds of greatness in you. See, I don't know if you believe in something bigger than you or not. But I can tell you this, if you go take a spoon out of the ocean, you pour it into a cup, you drive it home. That little part of the ocean that you poured into the cup, that little part is still part of the ocean is in that cup. Because that's where it came from. If you believe you come from something greater than you, if you believe in a higher power, if you believe in God, if you believe in that, where you come from, there's always a little part of that in you. There is greatness in you. There's the DNA of greatness in you. You're supposed to do something great to give.

• 1:30:50Ed Mylett?

  You were born for a reason. You were, you're worthy of it, you deserve it. Be kind, be patient, be demanding, be relentless, be obsessed with doing something great. But above all, be good for yourself. And friends, let's make your life a masterpiece. You're worthy of it and the world needs you to be the best you you can possibly be. God bless you, take care.

• 1:31:11Speaker 03

  Follow Ed on Twitter, edmilet.com and Champions Forum Podcast.