"I Have Crabs"

FOLLOW THE PIVOT PODCAST: MERCH | https://pivotpodcast.com YOUTUBE | https://www.youtube.com/thepivotpodcast INSTAGRAM | https://instagram.com/thepivot TWITTER | https://twitter.com/thepivot TIKTOK | https://tiktok.com/@thepivot FACEBOOK | https://www.facebook.com/thepivotpodcast FOLLOW HAPPY DAD: https://www.instagram.com/happydad FIND HAPPY DAD: https://www.happydad.com/find It’s Friday and we have a fun one for you! Ryan, Channing and Fred find themselves in Vegas with a last minute guest cancellation because of Covid so they decide to do a show with just the three of them which leads from one crazy topic to the next! Discussing the new Covid protocols of intimacy- Channing doesn’t hold back on his thoughts and recalls a story from his college football days of when he had crabs and didn’t know what to do during practice. Completely uncut and detailed, Fred covers his head as the story becomes more and more crazy. Ryan questions how they even ended up at this story. A new episode of The Pivot releases every Tuesday at noon eastern with special shows releasing on Fridays. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

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• 0:30Ryan Clark?

  He told a story about taking his pops to the strip club and like his pops would be like, "Chang, how she look?" Right, so I thought that would be, I thought that would be like a funny story because his pops can't see. But he in the strip club.

• 0:41Channing Crowder?

  Blind ass daddy.

• 0:43Ryan Clark?

  And he said like one time, he gave his pops all his money, like some singles, and the stripper took it from him.

• 0:48Channing Crowder?

  He didn't even know he was, he was brushing his hips and all the money was gone.

• 1:16Ryan Clark?

  We in Vegas. We decided we were gonna come out here and do a couple of shows. We had some people lined up. But with the way everything is right now, man, we had people test positive for COVID. Couldn't even have the guests we thought or, you know, shoot, the cast that we thought. It's just getting crazy because I take it extremely serious. You know what I'm saying? Like I was finna cancel Christmas for my whole family. Right. Because my old lady coughed twice. You know, and I told, nah, straight up, I told her, I was like, "You get tested, oh, you ain't going to see my parents on Christmas Eve, right? And your people can't come here on Saturday. This would be a very merry Baton Rouge Clark Christmas." And I get it, like, I'd be tripping. Do y'all, like, how y'all see it though? Because like, it messed up, it messed up everything we came out here to do.

• 1:59Channing Crowder?

  It changed the world. It changed the world, really. COVID changed the world. How everything does, everything goes down. We down in a casino, we hanging out.

• 2:05Ryan Clark?

  Right.

• 2:06Channing Crowder?

  And it changed everything, but how, like, how do you navigate it?

• 2:09Fred Taylor?

  For me, you just gotta live. Because it's the experts don't know what's going on. They tell you quarantine for fourteen days, then it's ten days.

• 2:18Channing Crowder?

  Then it's five.

• 2:18Fred Taylor?

  Now it's five days. They say it's six feet. Then I saw a special where they say it's more like nine to twelve feet. You know, they really don't know. They're saying you get it once, will you be immune? You got antibodies, you got this, you got that. I know ten year olds, right? That's had it twice in a span of four months and he's vaccinated. So the shit's just curious. Nobody knows, what do you call it?

• 2:42Ryan Clark?

  Yeah.

• 2:43Fred Taylor?

  The new STD or?

• 2:44Ryan Clark?

  Yeah, that's what it is. It's the new STD. Like, you know, like when STD started popping up, everybody's trying to figure out, how do we get rid of these, rid of these illnesses? I mean, you dang near, bruh. You meet a chick, it ain't even like, hey, uh, we gonna strap up, you on the pill. It's like, when last time you got a COVID test? And are you willing to take one before I tongue kiss you? Or we gonna have to just do it in a way where our faces ain't close?

• 3:07Fred Taylor?

  Right. Would it be the at-home test or the rapid PCR? See, because at-home.

• 3:12Channing Crowder?

  The Walgreens, the put in the little box test?

• 3:15Fred Taylor?

  That's the, that's the at-home.

• 3:17Channing Crowder?

  Yeah, I don't trust.

• 3:17Fred Taylor?

  But they say you shouldn't take that one unless you got symptoms.

• 3:20Ryan Clark?

  But the other part is though.

• 3:21Fred Taylor?

  If you trying to get down, how you know your symptoms are?

• 3:24Ryan Clark?

  The thing is too, I'm, I'm, I'm pretty sure that would be a mood killer though. You know what I'm saying? Like, yo, hey, you about to, you know what I'm saying? Y'all, y'all about to get down, hold on, oh, wait, wait, boo, boo, boo. You look good, but can I swab your nose real quick?

• 3:36Channing Crowder?

  Hit this by next.

• 3:38Ryan Clark?

  Yeah.

• 3:38Channing Crowder?

  Hit this by next real fast.

• 3:40Ryan Clark?

  Because the way I am, I'd probably rather get the STD than COVID.

• 3:47Channing Crowder?

  Huh?

• 3:47Ryan Clark?

  What?

• 3:48Channing Crowder?

  You'd rather get STD than COVID?

• 3:50Ryan Clark?

  Ain't nobody never die from chlamydia.

• 3:52Channing Crowder?

  Oh, Jesus Christ.

• 3:53Ryan Clark?

  You can shave all your hair off, get rid of crabs? Have you ever had crabs?

• 3:56Channing Crowder?

  Yeah, no, no, that's what I was gonna say, because I've had COVID.

• 4:00Ryan Clark?

  Okay.

• 4:00Channing Crowder?

  My thing, I had COVID and I'm vaccinated. So that's why I'm kind of, I'm a little more looser, to be honest, because I'm like, I did everything I could. My body has the antibodies and I let them create the antibodies, to be honest. And that's, that's my opinion. I know this has been politicized a lot about, you know, what's going on and there's two sides to this. But with what I've been through, my whole family caught at the same time, three kids, me and my wife, five of us caught at the same time.

• 4:22Ryan Clark?

  What's your youngest?

• 4:23Channing Crowder?

  Year and a half ago. My son, my, my youngest was four months, five months.

• 4:28Ryan Clark?

  Positive two?

• 4:29Channing Crowder?

  And didn't have a symptom. My daughter, eight, didn't have a symptom. Me and my son lost our taste. But my wife, Asia. She was in the hospital for two days with back pains with, you know, uh, what, walking pneumonia and all that, that, that, that they talk about.

• 4:42Ryan Clark?

  But see though, like if I get it, like you know I'll have no spleen, right? And we, you say I'm sickly, but I'm not sickly. Like I hardly ever get sick.

• 4:48Channing Crowder?

  You don't have a spleen.

• 4:49Ryan Clark?

  I don't have a spleen or a gallbladder or like a piece of my liver.

• 4:51Channing Crowder?

  You ain't got no organs.

• 4:52Ryan Clark?

  They say you don't need them joints, but that's what they told me when they took them out, right?

• 4:57Channing Crowder?

  He got man organs.

• 4:59Ryan Clark?

  Hollow man. But dog, stop laughing at me, man. That's, that's like serious, dog. I could've died. I was like, I lost like forty-five pounds, man.

• 5:06Channing Crowder?

  He did.

• 5:07Ryan Clark?

  You freaking mean, dog.

• 5:08Channing Crowder?

  I'm not mean. I, I'll have one kidney. I was born with one kidney. Yeah.

• 5:12Ryan Clark?

  I mean, you, so you look, you're over, you're overgrown, man.

• 5:15Channing Crowder?

  My dad was, he was, he was in Miami in the seventies.

• 5:18Ryan Clark?

  So he was living?

• 5:18Channing Crowder?

  Yeah, he was living. He had a lot of stuff in this.

• 5:20Fred Taylor?

  So he definitely not had the claps, the crabs.

• 5:23Channing Crowder?

  I don't know what my daddy had.

• 5:24Ryan Clark?

  You can't put that on that man daddy.

• 5:26Fred Taylor?

  They ain't even have no rubbers back then.

• 5:28Channing Crowder?

  Listen, Randy is suave, motherfucker.

• 5:31Channing Crowder?

  Randy was back there doing his thing back there in Miami.

• 5:33Fred Taylor?

  I get it now. That's where Rudolph come from. Randolph.

• 5:36Channing Crowder?

  Randolph, Randolph.

• 5:38Fred Taylor?

  He look like a Randolph.

• 5:39Ryan Clark?

  Look at this shirt. He already came tucked up. You all tight buttoned up.

• 5:42Channing Crowder?

  Who coming, who coming? Deebo.

• 5:45Ryan Clark?

  I really like this shirt, dog. Like, it's like Deebo, first, first Friday, riding the bike. Um.

• 5:51Channing Crowder?

  Squeak squeak.

• 5:52Ryan Clark?

  Fred, put your shoes on top of the thing?

• 5:54Channing Crowder?

  Don't. There you go. Wait, wait, wait. We're gonna, we're gonna do a, we're gonna do a shoe thing. Y'all gonna throw y'all shoes up?

• 6:00Ryan Clark?

  Put your shoe up, Shannon. Sit back.

• 6:02Channing Crowder?

  Y'all got the bottom with it too, hun. It's clean bottoms.

• 6:04Ryan Clark?

  Yeah, cuz we don't just wear them all the time. So Shannon, so Shannon.

• 6:08Channing Crowder?

  They call them black Harachis.

• 6:09Ryan Clark?

  Okay, Shannon, first off, how old are they?

• 6:12Channing Crowder?

  They about seven months, six, seven months.

• 6:14Ryan Clark?

  All right, they about seven months.

• 6:14Channing Crowder?

  They still clean though.

• 6:16Ryan Clark?

  They not clean. They wrinkled. And they messed up. Why the little top finna come off though? Like?

• 6:20Channing Crowder?

  Cuz I dragged my toe when I ride a scooter.

• 6:23Ryan Clark?

  Where you ride a scooter to?

• 6:25Channing Crowder?

  I got kids, baby. You don't got automatic kick scooter.

• 6:28Ryan Clark?

  Okay, so, so you chose to wear them shoes, but?

• 6:31Channing Crowder?

  I put them on, yeah, I decided.

• 6:32Ryan Clark?

  Right? We, we have filmed though with you and some Jays.

• 6:37Channing Crowder?

  Yeah.

• 6:37Ryan Clark?

  You had the fourteens, the brow joints. Those was hard. Are we gonna see those, are you gonna run those back?

• 6:44Channing Crowder?

  Ain't nobody seeing those again.

• 6:46Ryan Clark?

  Why not?

• 6:47Fred Taylor?

  Whoa, whoa.

• 6:48Ryan Clark?

  Wait, so, so you just go wear them one time, put them up, maybe resell them?

• 6:52Channing Crowder?

  Nah, I don't even got them no more. I took them back.

• 6:58Channing Crowder?

  I wore them one time, we had it earlier show, I wore them one time. And then I, I went and took them back.

• 7:05Ryan Clark?

  Took them back for those?

• 7:06Channing Crowder?

  To the store, I'm not gonna wear them no more.

• 7:07Fred Taylor?

  Randall.

• 7:08Channing Crowder?

  I'm gonna give them to somebody, I'm blessing somebody else with those beautiful shoes.

• 7:10Ryan Clark?

  Wait, so, so you brought them somewhere where somebody can get them for cheaper or for free?

• 7:14Channing Crowder?

  No, I took them back to the store, I got it from, they were like two thirty or something.

• 7:18Ryan Clark?

  So, so you get your money back?

• 7:19Channing Crowder?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 7:19Ryan Clark?

  So really, you ain't blessing nobody, you giving the store opportunity to just make their money back?

• 7:23Channing Crowder?

  To resell it, they put it in a little plastic shrink wrap, look brand new. I ain't even leave, I ain't even leaving them, I don't even walk in shoes like that. Two hundred thirty dollar shoes, I don't even go outside in them.

• 7:33Fred Taylor?

  But you been in the comments, that was you or Asia? Cause I, I got a message for Asia, when you put those up?

• 7:40Channing Crowder?

  Mm-hmm.

• 7:41Fred Taylor?

  We gotta work on the sock game. You got on these long jeans.

• 7:45Channing Crowder?

  What, what you want me to wear, a crew sock?

• 7:47Fred Taylor?

  Nah, wear something sexy, baby, like, you know, my sock's purple right now, I don't really care what color, you know, look. I'm gonna pull them out real quick, you see?

• 7:55Channing Crowder?

  Oh, so I need to, I need to wear church socks?

• 7:57Fred Taylor?

  They not church socks.

• 7:58Channing Crowder?

  That's, that's a church sock for you.

• 7:59Fred Taylor?

  Ain't no such thing as church socks.

• 8:01Ryan Clark?

  These are church socks.

• 8:03Fred Taylor?

  That's true, that's solid black.

• 8:04Channing Crowder?

  That's, that's right.

• 8:05Fred Taylor?

  That'll work for you.

• 8:06Ryan Clark?

  That's an actual church sock.

• 8:07Fred Taylor?

  But you can wear anything.

• 8:08Channing Crowder?

  We can call him Reverend the rest of the show.

• 8:09Ryan Clark?

  Deacon RC is fine for me. I have actually preached a sermon on Men's Day at the Regular Baptist Church in Gretna, Louisiana.

• 8:16Fred Taylor?

  It, it's, and you don't have to be a fashionista or fashionisto. You know what I'm saying, but you got on no-shows with Levi's, baby.

• 8:27Channing Crowder?

  So no skin ain't sexy? I got pretty calves.

• 8:30Fred Taylor?

  I know Asia know better.

• 8:31Channing Crowder?

  Asia do, Asia get on me, my wife get on me, you know, she's the stylish one, so she get on me all the time.

• 8:36Fred Taylor?

  But you don't trust her, what's the problem?

• 8:37Channing Crowder?

  I do trust her, but I don't like to shop. She like to shop. When we shop, I act funny. She gets mad.

• 8:45Ryan Clark?

  Right.

• 8:45Channing Crowder?

  Like, yeah, all that going in trying to put, I don't even want to try stuff.

• 8:48Ryan Clark?

  Do you have a, you have a lot of, a lot of interesting, uh, dynamics in relationships in your life, right?

• 8:54Channing Crowder?

  Oh, yeah.

• 8:55Ryan Clark?

  Like you spoke about, you want less men to want your wife. So, men that ain't worried about women are people that you like.

• 9:01Channing Crowder?

  Boy, I love me a good homosexual man. I do.

• 9:04Ryan Clark?

  Don't say it like that, Chandler.

• 9:05Channing Crowder?

  I do.

• 9:06Fred Taylor?

  Time out.

• 9:06Ryan Clark?

  You have to, you have to explain that and say that a different way, Chandler.

• 9:09Channing Crowder?

  Some of my tightest buddies are homosexual men because of the fact that they, they're pleasant dudes. They're fashionable, smart, you know what I'm saying? Like, and they that, and they're not trying to hit my wife, they're trying to hit me. And I can hold out.

• 9:23Ryan Clark?

  Right.

• 9:23Channing Crowder?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And nobody, and nobody gonna hit me.

• 9:26Ryan Clark?

  But I'm trying to get to a different point. That was way off the subject.

• 9:28Fred Taylor?

  Man, you, this dude, your mouth so loose, man.

• 9:30Ryan Clark?

  It's so loose. But you were telling me a little bit earlier, dog. I just found it interesting, like you were talking about your pops. Like, y'all all met Jordan.

• 9:37Channing Crowder?

  Yeah.

• 9:37Ryan Clark?

  And the kind of relationship we had. And then you were telling me about your pops and the fact that your pops played ball too. I didn't know that.

• 9:42Channing Crowder?

  Yeah.

• 9:42Ryan Clark?

  Actually played for the Dolphins.

• 9:44Channing Crowder?

  We're the first father and son to ever get drafted to the same team in NFL history.

• 9:50Fred Taylor?

  The first?

• 9:51Channing Crowder?

  The first.

• 9:52Ryan Clark?

  But that's crazy.

• 9:52Channing Crowder?

  My pops got drafted in 1974 in the sixth round to the Dolphins. I got drafted in 05 in the third round to the Dolphins.

• 9:59Fred Taylor?

  Wow.

• 9:59Channing Crowder?

  The Matthew boys played for the Patriots with his uncle and his dad.

• 10:02Ryan Clark?

  Yeah.

• 10:03Channing Crowder?

  There's other people that played for the same team, but me and my father, the first father and son to ever get drafted to the same team.

• 10:08Fred Taylor?

  Did they publicize that a lot when you came out?

• 10:11Channing Crowder?

  They did.

• 10:11Fred Taylor?

  This is the first time I've ever heard of it.

• 10:13Channing Crowder?

  Yeah, they, they, they amped up in Miami, but they didn't really, it wasn't a, it wasn't like a big time story because to be honest, you know, my dad wasn't the all-pro guy and I wasn't the all-pro guy. So, it didn't get as big as like the Clay Matthews and his pops and uncle and all that stuff.

• 10:25Ryan Clark?

  Yeah, like that stuff happens down the line after people play for a long time.

• 10:28Channing Crowder?

  Yeah.

• 10:28Ryan Clark?

  And then they figure out. But I know you was telling me that like, y'all didn't talk for a while though.

• 10:33Channing Crowder?

  Mm-hmm.

• 10:33Ryan Clark?

  And I think that's an interesting dynamic to me because now you're saying that you guys are so close and, and I love that because it's almost like, all right, man, like, what happened or whatever it was, was, and now we can have this grown-up relationship.

• 10:47Channing Crowder?

  That's the one thing I see, and it's, it's great with you and Jordan. It's great with you and your son, meeting you, your son, talking with them, talking with y'all and seeing y'all's dynamic of being so young and being that close your whole life. But my, my pops and, and my mom, Pauline. They got divorced when I was almost 10 and we moved away. And that's one thing, just a teaching experience for, you know, people out there is that the, the grownups are the ones that have to be the people that make that right.

• 11:17Fred Taylor?

  Right, yeah.

• 11:18Channing Crowder?

  And that's who it is, the, the grown, the grown folks, and I know y'all have, you know, different, you know, kids with other women, and I don't know what y'all been through with it, but when my mom and dad broke up, it was so divisive between them that the kids felt that. Me and my, me and my two sisters felt that. And so with my mom and dad being, you know, being at, at odds, then it kind of be, it kind of created some at odds with me and my pops.

• 11:44Fred Taylor?

  Yeah.

• 11:44Channing Crowder?

  And it stopped all through college. I ain't talking to my pops, I'm at Florida. He lived in Tampa. He's two hours away. And I'm playing at Florida, I'm all SCC, all American, I'm balling out, you know, people, I'm sure people talk, he told me now that we're tight, people talking to him about, hey, your son, your son, your son is this, your son's dad, I love your son. And we, we didn't have a relationship. And sitting there and being a part of that now as a grown man, seeing it and coming back to it and seeing that that was the wrong thing, but the divisiveness between my mom and dad hurt me and my dad's relationship. And I, I, I think ultimately it hurt me and my mom's relationship as well. So the, any parents out there that are in that position, like you don't understand what that does to the kids. You gotta let that go.

• 12:29Channing Crowder?

  You gotta worry about the, the children, worry about what they need. I needed a father. I needed a male figure. I needed a guy that, my dad was a three-time All-American at Penn State. I'm All-American, like, we had a lot in common.

• 12:39Ryan Clark?

  But, but it made it happen, like for me, it's not where everything ends up. It's about the relationships that develops through your experience together. You know what I'm saying? It's the, like, it's the time I wanted to jump in the backseat and fight Jordan one day because he said something stupid to me. And next, the next minute, we were talking about the football game. It's being there at the state championship and, you know, he, he gets beat on a play and he looks up to me, he gets to the sideline and I can be like, hey, look, you need to slide outside, you need to do that. And I think just those small moments are things that parents in those situations don't understand. And you know, you mentioned the fact that I had a child with somebody else. It was different because I was the parent in the house with the child. Well, like a lot of times it ends up, it ends up being the mom, you know what I'm saying?

• 13:22Ryan Clark?

  And it, and it's different to have to sit down and have conversations with her about the fact that she is worthy, about the fact that she does matter. And two, to have her. Long for and yearn for somebody who's not around. You know what I'm saying? When you got, when I'm married to somebody that's taking care of you, that loves you. I've loved you since, since the day they told me they were gonna have you. And they said, well, maybe y'all are too young and we should put up, put you up for adoption. And so, like, I had to, to deal with that situation. And it is difficult. For me, it was different though, because I didn't have, like, no emotion for her mom like that. You know what I'm saying? Like, my heart wasn't broken, was any of those things. It's like, I just want my baby. I would think nothing would hurt me more than not being at graduations.

• 14:07Ryan Clark?

  That, for my daughter now, who does live away with her mom, which is cra- which is crazy, which is hard for me. I knew before she was leaving that she was leaving. But she walks in the back, I'm on the Peloton. And she's like, Dad, I think it'd be best, you know, I think it's more opportunity in San Francisco, this and that. And hell, yeah, it hurt, because here I am at home, trying to get you a job now, at home. Trying to let you do all these other things, but there are some things that, like, we can't fix. And no, but to have her leave, bruh, and, you know, and she'll text me and I'll be like, babe, how you doing? Like, how are things? How's your job? And she'll be like, you know, everything's good, Pop. I just miss my best friend. You know, she's like, I ain't never been this far away from you. Like, I've always been with you. She's like, it's just weird, it's just hard. And so, when it happens at that age, I could deal with it. But I couldn't imagine it being, you know, where you guys were.

• 14:51Fred Taylor?

  You feel like you did your job, right?

• 14:53Ryan Clark?

  Yeah.

• 14:53Fred Taylor?

  That's all that matters.

• 14:54Channing Crowder?

  But Fred, it's funny, it's funny to this, Fred, it's funny, this dynamic, because single mother's a phrase. We've heard it our whole life. Everybody, everybody heard it their whole life. Single mother, single mother. What about the single father or the isolated father?

• 15:07Fred Taylor?

  Yeah.

• 15:08Channing Crowder?

  When you do, when they live with their mom, but you're the one on the outskirts? And that's the thing, too, as a, as the show that we, you know what I'm saying? We doing the pivot, like, we doing this.

• 15:47Speaker 04

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• 16:17Channing Crowder?

  So, speak on it. And a couple of people came up to me and talked about it like, "Y'all need to talk about this. Y'all need to talk about the fathers on the opposite side of the single mother." And there are some deadbeat ass dads out there.

• 16:29Ryan Clark?

  Straight up. And they need to be that.

• 16:32Channing Crowder?

  I thought my father was a deadbeat dad.

• 16:34Ryan Clark?

  Yeah.

• 16:34Channing Crowder?

  But I found out later, he wasn't a deadbeat dad.

• 16:37Ryan Clark?

  Yeah.

• 16:38Channing Crowder?

  But I couldn't do that at 10, 11, 12, 13 years old to figure out he wants to be involved.

• 16:42Ryan Clark?

  But there's also not people that get drafted to the same team your dad was drafted to, that have Alumni Day and your pops is there.

• 16:50Fred Taylor?

  I wanted to go back to there too. You guys' relationships. You know, what was the pivot? What was the change in your relationship?

• 16:58Channing Crowder?

  I'll tell you, Nat Moore, great slot receiver in Miami. Dog, he's now, he's some big, they made a name up for him. Nat Moore is a great dude. He's like an uncle to me, knew him as a kid. And even when I got to the Dolphins, and they have an Alumni Day in camp. When all the old dudes come out and y'all have a barbecue after practice. And Nat came to me because Nat knew my father and knew me. So, he came up to me, he was like, "I know you and your dad aren't on speaking terms, but I want to invite your father to Alumni Day."

• 17:25Fred Taylor?

  You guys not being on speaking terms, was it you?

• 17:29Channing Crowder?

  It was me.

• 17:30Fred Taylor?

  Why? Did you feel that he did something to your mother?

• 17:33Ryan Clark?

  But you live with your mom.

• 17:36Fred Taylor?

  Nah, I want to know, what was it?

• 17:38Channing Crowder?

  I live with my mom. She was a supporter. She was the, she fed me. Put a roof over my head, she closed me. She was my everything. She was getting the check, she was getting that government check, she was getting that child support. But she pushed this separation between me and my pops. That I couldn't mend as a fifteen, sixteen year old kid.

• 17:59Ryan Clark?

  But did you feel like at that time, the man of the house though? Or no? Like, did you feel like you had, like, because you know, like, sometimes cats start to think, like, young men, I have to protect my mom now, I have to be on her side. You know, and so you hearing these things and you like, is it almost a betrayal that she feels this way about this certain person? And I'm now longing for that person, or I'm now trying to talk to him or be with him. I need to show her that I'm rocking with her and nobody else.

• 18:25Channing Crowder?

  Yeah, you gotta pick teams. Like, it's two sides to it, you gotta pick a team. And I picked the team of the person I see every day, the person that wakes me up for school, the person that drives me to school, the person that feeds me, the person that takes me to football practice, baseball practice, basketball practice, track. I sided on those terms with her. And now as a grown man, I saw what I did. And that's, I think, half of my grind to make it where we all made it. I didn't feel like I was a man of the house. And that phrase that you just said kind of clicked to me.

• 18:57Ryan Clark?

  Yeah.

• 18:57Channing Crowder?

  I didn't feel like I had to protect the house or protect my sisters, I have two older sisters. Protect Daisy and Alana. I felt that I need to make something of myself.

• 19:06Ryan Clark?

  Okay.

• 19:06Channing Crowder?

  If it's football, I went to Florida going in animal science, I was gonna be a veterinarian, like, I never wanted to be a, you know, like a lawyer and job, I wanted to.

• 19:16Ryan Clark?

  You wanted to excel.

• 19:17Channing Crowder?

  I always wanted to excel to be the man that I think that could take my family to a different place.

• 19:23Ryan Clark?

  Yeah.

• 19:24Channing Crowder?

  So I didn't feel as if I needed to be that man of the house, as you say. But I felt as if I need to make it. I'm so talented, I'm so smart, I'm so physically talented, that. I can take this, this somewhere.

• 19:36Fred Taylor?

  Was there ever a time when you came back and looked at your mom and said, hey, you was wrong? He's not what you told me he was.

• 19:44Channing Crowder?

  And we've had that conversation about growing up. We've had a conversation about a number of things, not just with my dad, but just with life and, and the ideologies of what a single mother goes through and how she's, you know, she's everything. So she puts everything on her kids, what she believes. And that's what I went through is where I had so, so much in my mind about what, and as a grown man, you see it and a lot of kids out there will see it as they grow up. But they put parents out there, period, about everything else, everybody, you know, everything, not just divorce and all this, what we're talking about, but everything that people talk about. You are your kid's teacher of life. They have a first grade, second grade, third grade teacher. The life teaching is what parents put on you.

• 20:26Fred Taylor?

  But see, that's the thing in our community though. I mean, I can't speak for other community or cultures because I don't know. But in my upbringing, my mother had me when she was 15, right? And it's a similar situation as you, but she never talked bad about my dad. My mom, she was young and she was afraid. But what she wanted to do was protect myself and protect my, my brothers and sisters, you know, along the way. So she didn't necessarily bash my dad. But, you know, it was more along the lines of, uh, I'm here for you. Regardless of what he does, I'm gonna be here for you. My dad and I, we developed a relationship when I was a sophomore in high school.

• 21:09Fred Taylor?

  And at that particular time, you know, some people can look at it that he came around when, you know, I was starting to...

• 21:17Channing Crowder?

  Starting to become Fred Taylor.

• 21:18Fred Taylor?

  When I was starting to become Fred Taylor, right? Or he felt in himself that, look, your mom, she was young and she was afraid. You know, whatever went on, she wasn't 100% honest with you. I'm gonna come back and make this right. So the latter part of that is the truth. He came back into the picture from military and he said, all those years that I've missed, I wanna make up for that. I'm gonna make this right. And from my sophomore year in high school, I never questioned anything.

• 21:51Fred Taylor?

  After I retired from the NFL.

• 21:52Channing Crowder?

  You also too have to remember he's not retired. Fred's old.

• 21:56Fred Taylor?

  Man, I'm not old. You throw old shit away. I am seasoned, baby.

• 22:00Channing Crowder?

  Freddie, do you buy them pills from the gas station to get your meat right?

• 22:03Fred Taylor?

  Here we go.

• 22:04Channing Crowder?

  That big horse pill. The blue one that be at the gas station? They come in ones and you gotta pop it out the back?

• 22:09Fred Taylor?

  So my side get.

• 22:10Channing Crowder?

  Freddie, do they work?

• 22:12Fred Taylor?

  Aside from that, you can subscribe to FreakyFreddie.com.

• 22:18Fred Taylor?

  Or my close friends, right? For $9.99, we can have these conversations.

• 22:24Channing Crowder?

  What?

• 22:24Fred Taylor?

  We'll have those discussions. I wanna, I wanna talk about.

• 22:27Channing Crowder?

  Freak, he nasty.

• 22:28Fred Taylor?

  You, yeah, I am.

• 22:29Channing Crowder?

  A goat. I heard about a goat in the bedroom. Or I see a goat just looking at him. What do you need that for? He wanna perform in front of somebody else? You performer? He show out. Fred, Fred gave me a little rose, some little vibrating rose one time.

• 22:45Fred Taylor?

  You see how I'm looking at it, right?

• 22:47Channing Crowder?

  Freddie gave me a little rose one, it's like a vibrating rose one time. I seen that on the show or something like that. See how he covered it? He was like, "Bro, try this." And he gave me a little rose that vibrates and it got like a little, you put a little juice in the middle. Bro, I didn't know what to do with it.

• 23:02Fred Taylor?

  You put a juice in?

• 23:03Channing Crowder?

  I put it, I put it on the kitchen table. I put a candle in the top. I didn't know what to do.

• 23:10Channing Crowder?

  People come home like, "Hold on, Shannon, you know what that is, right?" That's a candle holder, I thought.

• 23:15Fred Taylor?

  That's a whole nother topic, bro.

• 23:17Channing Crowder?

  Yeah.

• 23:17Fred Taylor?

  Stop it, bro.

• 23:18Channing Crowder?

  Freddie, one thing I wanna say, cause you asked me earlier about my mom's side. I say this, and it's something that me and my dad talked about. When I'm a grown ass man, he's a grown ass man.

• 23:28Channing Crowder?

  And men out there, my dad said I should've pushed harder. That's real. Against your mom. Yep. I should've pushed harder to have a relationship with you. I should've pushed, I should've pushed harder for you. That, and, and, and that, so you say me and my mom, we've had, me and my mom have had a bunch of conversations about it and we, we've come to that. But my dad, he, he's, he's admitted, he was like, "When she started pushing back, I didn't push back hard enough." So she pushed me all the way in the corner and I stayed in the corner. And any man out there that has a child. With a woman that you're not with.

• 24:00Ryan Clark?

  Fight for your kid.

• 24:01Channing Crowder?

  Fight for your kid.

• 24:02Fred Taylor?

  There's only a small percentage of guys.

• 24:04Channing Crowder?

  That do it. More people should do it, Freddie.

• 24:06Fred Taylor?

  Right. We take a little longer to mature than women. Women are ready right now. Men aren't. You know, so I can understand where he came from. Plus, he was in Miami slanging, like you said, right?

• 24:17Channing Crowder?

  Randy got a slug.

• 24:19Fred Taylor?

  Aw, shit.

• 24:20Ryan Clark?

  But you said, you said you take your pops to, uh, strip club?

• 24:24Fred Taylor?

  Tootsie's?

• 24:25Ryan Clark?

  No.

• 24:25Fred Taylor?

  You took him to Tootsie's?

• 24:26Channing Crowder?

  I took him to Tootsie's.

• 24:27Ryan Clark?

  But you, but you said your pops, he can't see what's going on?

• 24:30Channing Crowder?

  My, my, he blind.

• 24:31Ryan Clark?

  Right?

• 24:32Channing Crowder?

  But he can touch.

• 24:33Ryan Clark?

  Okay, so it's like Ray Charles, like he can feel my wrist?

• 24:36Channing Crowder?

  Grab the wrist and he know what it is. You know when they say one sense leaves, the other ones get stronger?

• 24:41Ryan Clark?

  Yeah, his touch nice, nice.

• 24:42Channing Crowder?

  Boy, Big Randy, Big Randy get right. And I ain't gonna lie, first time I saw Big Randy come out the shower, I was like.

• 24:50Channing Crowder?

  See, I got my, I got my mama's.

• 24:58Channing Crowder?

  Boy, I am weak, dawg.

• 24:59Ryan Clark?

  I do. Like, once I saw my daddy, I'm like, damn, why did I get that? Like, my daddy big dude, I'm a big dude. My daddy thick, play the league, I'm thick in that. But I'm like, why did I, why did God give me my mama's? I wish I had my daddy. Hey, maybe not, maybe, maybe penis come from the mama side of the family. Like, if your mama daddy tall, then you'll be tall.

• 25:21Channing Crowder?

  You'll be tall.

• 25:22Ryan Clark?

  So maybe your mama daddy was tall.

• 25:24Channing Crowder?

  My mama daddy wasn't tall. My daddy was tall.

• 25:26Ryan Clark?

  So you got your daddy height, but your mama meat?

• 25:28Channing Crowder?

  My mama meat.

• 25:29Ryan Clark?

  Dang, dawg. That's tough.

• 25:30Channing Crowder?

  And I'm like, damn, why did I get that side of the meat? And I ain't hurting, I ain't hurting nothing, see? Now, I can, I got three babies now. I can, I can throw it down if I need to throw it down.

• 25:39Ryan Clark?

  I mean, all you need to do is work.

• 25:41Channing Crowder?

  When, when my wife says, go deeper, I tell her, I don't got no nothing left. I say, we head to head.

• 25:49Fred Taylor?

  Head to head? Head to head?

• 25:52Channing Crowder?

  Head to head. See, I'm shaking.

• 25:55Channing Crowder?

  We had a hair.

• 25:57Ryan Clark?

  They glued tight as hell and everything, dawg. You didn't get, damn, hip flexors. Yeah.

• 26:03Channing Crowder?

  Booty tight, trying to, trying to, I, yeah, I don't know. They say, they say, measure, measure your meat. I measure way back from the middle and come up with the ruler. Where you supposed to measure your meat from?

• 26:16Ryan Clark?

  Hey, man, hey, there's no way they allow us to keep making shows.

• 26:21Ryan Clark?

  We'll never do a show without a guest, because we need, we need guidance. We need somebody to ask questions to. We need to know where the hell the topic is going. Listen, I, I just, like, I, when we start these things, I'm like, alright, I got a pretty good thought process of how this, this conversation could go. That does not work with y'all, man.

• 26:40Channing Crowder?

  You know what we do?

• 26:41Ryan Clark?

  We done talked about COVID, commedia, crabs.

• 26:45Channing Crowder?

  Yeah, we talked about crabs.

• 26:47Ryan Clark?

  You, you. Oh, you didn't finish it. You were trying to get there, but we.

• 26:50Channing Crowder?

  But no, this is, this is, this is knowledge for people out there. The crab community.

• 26:57Ryan Clark?

  The other thing, do people still get them? It's a free game.

• 26:59Channing Crowder?

  I didn't think they got them in those six. I was at Florida, I was running. This before I met my wife and all, you know, I was running. So she, she understands, she done heard the story before.

• 27:08Ryan Clark?

  Wow.

• 27:08Channing Crowder?

  So, I'm out there running, I got me some little dibbles and dabbles. I go to practice. I'm at practice, we warming up, and I don't know if anybody know, I found out later that moisture excites the crabs because they want to lunker down in your, in your hair. I didn't know at the time what was going on, and I didn't know who gave them to me. But, I go to practice, we practicing, we go through warmups, I feel some itching, and I'm like, okay, well, this is not normal. And so then we really get into practice, and I'm, I'm just, it's, I'm shaking, and I can't even go in. And I told Coach Charlie Strong, I'm like, Chuck, I can't go in. Charlie Strong was my defense coordinator at Florida. He's like, I say, Chuck, no, I can't, I can't run today. He was like, just get in the game.

• 27:52Channing Crowder?

  I was like, no, Coach, I can't go. So then they go deep one day again, and I'm all SEC All-American at this time. Like, they're like, we got to get ready for this game. I'm like, no, Coach, I'm not going in the game. Like, why? I don't want to sweat no more. It's like, why? So now, Ron Zook, he comes out. Crowder, where, where are you at? I said, Coach, I can't, it's itching. Hey, hey, hey, what do you mean? What do you mean it's itching? I said, yeah, my man's itching, my, my, my man part is itching.

• 28:19Channing Crowder?

  He's like, "What happened?" I said, "I don't know, Coach, when my man parts, it's itching." So he was like, "Just go inside, just, just get out of here." So he excused me from practice, run inside. The moisture again excites the crab, they lunker down. Cause they wanna lay eggs in your follicles. I did research. So I go, I'm trying to take a shower, and as I take a shower, it started itching more, cause the crabs are now lunkering down and putting they little crab claws into me. And I'm like, "Damn, this hurts."

• 28:52Channing Crowder?

  End up going to the trainer, trainer's like, "This isn't normal."

• 28:56Fred Taylor?

  Yeah.

• 28:57Channing Crowder?

  "This isn't lice, I thought I can get a little brush and brush them out." They're like, "No, these, the little eggs are small, you gotta suffocate them." So I had to go home. I had to take a bucket of peanut butter, and you gotta rub peanut butter all over your man pieces and all around on the hair.

• 29:14Fred Taylor?

  Peanut butter, stop.

• 29:15Channing Crowder?

  Peanut, bro.

• 29:16Fred Taylor?

  Peanut pan?

• 29:16Channing Crowder?

  No, no, this was, this was, this was public brand, I had no money back then. I, I, and it was smooth, so you can't use crunchy, cause it's hoes and crunchy.

• 29:26Channing Crowder?

  I used the creamy, and I had to sit there with the creamy on me.

• 29:29Fred Taylor?

  You are terrible, bro.

• 29:30Channing Crowder?

  So I got, I got, I got public brand creamy.

• 29:33Fred Taylor?

  And they got rid of it?

• 29:34Channing Crowder?

  Put it on, yeah, set it there, and then slowly the itching started stopping, cause the crab couldn't breathe.

• 29:40Fred Taylor?

  What's the message in that?

• 29:41Channing Crowder?

  I just taught people how to get rid of crabs. I just taught people that moisture excites them, cause they lunker down. I taught them that crabs lay eggs in your follicles. Fred, you're not listening, that's your problem, you don't listen.

• 29:54Ryan Clark?

  So, so basically, what happened is, we got a chance to do a podcast together, without a guest. And it started at COVID, which is a very serious situation. It then moved to STDs, which can be a very serious situation, we just didn't speak about it that way. We got to parenting, very serious topic, and we finished on crabs. So like I said, I really enjoyed our last podcast together, without a guest.

• 30:22Channing Crowder?

  I don't eat seafood.

• 30:24Ryan Clark?

  Cause you had the crabs.

• 30:25Channing Crowder?

  Crabs scared me now.

• 30:27Ryan Clark?

  Show's over, bro.

• 30:30Ryan Clark?

  I hate y'all, bro.

• 30:54Speaker 05

  No two football players are exactly alike, and the same is true off the field. That's why State Farm gets to know you so they can help personalize coverage for your life and budget. And like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.