The Gold Standard for Hosting Any Event with Brilliant Style Guru Colin Cowie

BUY THE BOOK! The Gold Standard by Colin Cowie https://amzn.to/4hSLdEd Event planner extraordinaire Colin Cowie is here to discuss his book "The Gold Standard: Giving Customers What They Didn’t Know They Wanted." Oprah and Colin have a fun going down memory lane to discuss the countless parties they’ve thrown together including one of their all-time favorites, Oprah Winfrey’s Legends Ball. They look back on the year-long planning of the historic event that honored the lives of the Black women who paved the way for Oprah’s life and millions of others. They also reminisce about what it was like throwing parties for Oprah’s friends like Sidney Poitier, Quincy Jones and Gayle King. Gayle joins the conversation to talk about her 50th and 70th birthday parties planned by Colin Cowie. Oprah and Colin Cowie both believe when having any type of celebration “love is in the details” which is why his book The Gold Standard is perfect for anyone looking for advice or tips on hosting a party your guests will never forget. 00:00:00 - Welcome Colin Cowie, author of “The Gold Standard” 00:03:15 - Love is in the details 00:04:50 - How do you want people to feel 00:07:30 - The most extravagant thing Oprah has ever done 00:12:20 - Oprah’s never thrown a party for herself 00:13:28 - Gayle King joins 00:14:30 - Post party depression 00:17:20 - Planning the Legend’s who paved the way party 00:19:50 - Gayle’s surprise 70th 00:24:40 - Advice for hosting your own event 00:29:45 - What Oprah’s learned from Colin 00:31:00 - What a well-lived life looks like Follow Oprah Winfrey on Social: https://www.instagram.com/oprahpodcast/ https://www.facebook.com/oprahpodcast/ https://www.instagram.com/oprah/?hl=en https://www.facebook.com/oprahwinfrey/

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Oprah Winfrey?

  Colin Cowie, there is no equal. One of the things that I love, and you say this in the gold standard, is that you're trying to create an experience that the people didn't even know they wanted.

• 0:11Speaker 01

  That's the magic.

• 0:12Oprah Winfrey?

  Do you have a favorite of things we've done?

• 0:13Speaker 01

  Without a New York second moment it takes to say it was the Legends event.

• 0:17Oprah Winfrey?

  I could start weeping right now.

• 0:19Speaker 01

  You let these ladies really feel loved, respected. They had their place in history, and it's exactly what you'd set out to do.

• 0:26Oprah Winfrey?

  Hey, Gail, Colin's here.

• 0:28Speaker 02

  Oh, my gosh, guys. I've been going crazy listening to this conversation because it has brought back so many great memories.

• 0:35Oprah Winfrey?

  Most people aren't going to be able to afford a Colin Cowie event. What is your number one piece of advice for someone at home who loves entertaining?

• 0:46Oprah Winfrey?

  Hi, everybody. I'm so, so, so excited to welcome you to the Oprah Podcast. I'm here on my porch and one of my favorite places to be with lifestyle advisor, interior designer, author, and event planner extraordinaire Colin Cowie. There is no equal. I will say that. There is no equal. Welcome, Colin. We've known each other for decades, and Colin appeared on The Oprah Winfrey Show, y'all, 17 times. That's how much we liked him. He planned too many parties for us to list, but let me say, a few of the highlights were, for me, the Legends Ball. Many of you know that. And the dinner of a lifetime celebrating Sidney Poitier. I had a party for Sidney Poitier.

• 1:30Oprah Winfrey?

  I remember he was 79, and somebody said, oh, you should wait to 80. And I said, when you're 79, you shouldn't wait to 80. You should have the party when you can have the party. Then a bash for Quincy Jones, his birthday. Quincy was 71. He was 71. The opening of my school in South Africa, that was unbelievable.

• 1:50Speaker 01

  That was extraordinary. I think we took 125 people to South Africa, to five different venues. Five different back-to-back events. It was extraordinary.

• 1:59Oprah Winfrey?

  But the list goes on and on and on. Do you have a favorite of things we've done?

• 2:03Speaker 01

  Yes, I mean, but there were so many favorites. I think the school opening was incredible. It was historical.

• 2:09Oprah Winfrey?

  Because Nelson Mandela was there.

• 2:11Speaker 01

  Exactly. And I think for me, after, I think Sidney's party, to coin your phrase, was layered in love. And there were so many great surprises, that musical surprises. I know the idea that Jamie Foxx could sing the way he sang.

• 2:24Oprah Winfrey?

  We had Jamie Foxx there.

• 2:26Speaker 01

  Did you remember?

• 2:26Oprah Winfrey?

  We flew in Lulu to sing "To Sir With Love."

• 2:29Speaker 01

  "To Sir With Love." And another great thing happened that night. David Foster said, ladies and gentlemen, I want to present for the very first time, a new young man, I think he's going to go places, Michael Buble.

• 2:40Oprah Winfrey?

  I know. Wow, that happened there.

• 2:43Speaker 01

  That happened there.

• 2:44Oprah Winfrey?

  Wow.

• 2:45Speaker 01

  And remember, it rained cats and dogs that night.

• 2:47Oprah Winfrey?

  This is what I remember, Colin. It rained like I've never seen, like Noah, like Noah's ark. It rained like Noah's ark, and you had built, we called it a tent, but it was a home. You had built this beautiful space outside in the backyard.

• 3:05Speaker 01

  Not a drop of rain.

• 3:06Oprah Winfrey?

  Not a drop of rain, and it was pouring, pouring, pouring, pouring rain. You know what I know for sure? That, I've said this over the years, that love is in the details. And I know that you believe that attention to even the smallest element helps create a richer experience for guests. And this is what I will say. I've been to lots of wonderful, spectacular, impressive parties, but the difference between a Colin Cowie party event is that you tell a story. And even though people leave impressed, it always feels to be about each individual. How did you come to realize this?

• 3:44Speaker 01

  Because, you know, a lot of people focus on the menu. A lot of people focus on the color scheme. For me, you need to dig deeper. You need to understand what is the objective. Why are we having this event, right? What is the intention behind it? So if it's the opening of a big fancy hotel, or maybe the launch of a product, maybe it's a couple who's getting married, right? You have who they were before. So as the storyteller, I'm telling the story of their joint statement of style. It's not just another big party. It's like, what do you want your guests to walk with? What do you want them to feel? What's the spirit that you want them to have? And then we can start to get a bit more granular and figure out what are they going to eat? And how are we going to entertain them? So it starts with the DNA.

• 4:26Speaker 01

  And that's why, if you look at my body of work, no two events ever look the same, but they always have that wonderful sense of detail. There's a sense of love. There's a sense of caring. And it's all about, at the end of the day, how we make you feel.

• 4:39Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah.

• 4:40Speaker 01

  And it's from serving those ingredients of what you smell, touch, taste here and here, and using those to tell the story.

• 4:47Oprah Winfrey?

  And so I think that can be applied to anybody who's creating any event. You start thinking about, what is the DNA? What is the intention behind it? And how do you want people to feel when they leave?

• 4:59Speaker 01

  100%. And that leads me to Legends.

• 5:03Oprah Winfrey?

  Yes.

• 5:03Speaker 01

  The Legends was...

• 5:05Oprah Winfrey?

  I could start weeping right now.

• 5:06Speaker 01

  Okay, me too. I'm not far behind you. But, you know, so many people say to me, what was the greatest event you did? What was the most extraordinary event you've ever did? It takes me New York now in a second to say.

• 5:16Oprah Winfrey?

  And you've done millions and millions of dollars worth of parties in Dubai.

• 5:19Speaker 01

  Across every continent.

• 5:20Oprah Winfrey?

  Every continent.

• 5:20Speaker 01

  Exactly. And bigger and flashy and whatever it be. But without a New York second moment it takes to say it was the Legends event, without a doubt.

• 5:30Oprah Winfrey?

  Every story we share on the Oprah Podcast comes from a place of intention. Each guest has their own journey, and my hope is that sharing it with us here can help light the way for somebody else. And as the official insurance partner of this podcast, GEICO understands that every journey feels a little easier when you know you have support along the way. It's the time of year when the weather changes, days get shorter, calendars fill up, and you find yourself back in motion again, taking the kids to school, running errands, heading home after the sun sets. During these busy days, it's the people who show up in small, steady ways who make the season feel a little lighter. The friend who stops by with a home-cooked dinner.

• 6:14Oprah Winfrey?

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• 6:45Oprah Winfrey?

  It was the Legends Ball in 2005, and we honored the black women who paved the way for me. It all started because I wanted to bring together these women who had been, I thought, a bridge for me in my life, and so many others. Dr. Maya Angelou, Cicely Tyson, y'all, Ruby Dee, Tina Turner, and so many others who made my life possible. I wanted to honor their greatness while they were still living. And we also included, I wanted to include a group of what I call young'uns at the time, like Angela Bassett, and Mariah Carey, and Halle Berry, and Alicia Keys, and others who were representing the future generation of trailblazers. It took us a year.

• 7:23Speaker 01

  I remember almost daily calls for a year, and you never left one detail unturned. And I think back, you know, there were so many memories of that. And I remember a moment, I had 60 waiters, one for every single guest. The table was in the shape of a giant O.

• 7:40Oprah Winfrey?

  I know, this was a thing. This was a thing. This was the first time I'd ever been to a party, certainly not having created a party, where there was a waiter for every single guest. There was a waiter.

• 7:53Speaker 01

  And the waiters put down 60 silver trays. And on each silver tray was a red alligator box with four silver legs, your name engraved on top, three inches of satin ribbon with a big bow round. The waiters put them down to three, and they left to three. And you said, you may open your gifts. And every lady received a 10-carat pair of diamonds.

• 8:13Oprah Winfrey?

  I know, it was unbelievable.

• 8:15Speaker 01

  No one's ever done that. But I remember the conversation with Gail when we're talking about, what are we going to gift these ladies? And one state, someone said, a monogrammed robe. We said, no, we can get that from the hotel. And then came the magical idea, let's give them diamonds.

• 8:27Oprah Winfrey?

  Let's give them diamonds. It was the most extravagant thing. Let's take a look. We have the clip. We have a clip.

• 8:33Speaker 01

  I couldn't contain myself because I knew just how exciting it was going to be.

• 8:38Oprah Winfrey?

  I was really just like, okay, come on, people, eat. Come on, people, eat. Ladies, take your seats. This is our final surprise. Do not open them of the day, final surprise of the day. Please do not open until everyone, until I tell you.

• 8:53Speaker 03

  All of a sudden, all these waiters lined up behind all the women. And we didn't know what was going on. The waiters put down in front of each of us a box.

• 9:04Speaker 04

  These red boxes came out. They were on these silver trays. And we're looking at these boxes like, what is this?

• 9:10Oprah Winfrey?

  Okay, ladies, let's start on the count of three. You can begin to open your boxes. One, two, three. Will we rip it off? Rip it off?

• 9:35Oprah Winfrey?

  Will start screaming and falling out because when you open the box, there are these earrings, the most beautiful expression of appreciation.

• 9:47Speaker 05

  They're real, of course they're real.

• 9:50Oprah Winfrey?

  Oh, that was really fun. That was fun.

• 9:55Speaker 01

  And no one's ever done anything like it since.

• 9:56Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah, that was the most extravagant thing I've ever done for those women. And I would say, you know, people today would be, oh, that's too much. And why did you do that? I would do it again for those legends, for every one of those women. And I look at this now and I think, look at how many are gone. Maya Angelou's gone, Cicely Tyson's gone.

• 10:15Speaker 01

  Any of them.

• 10:15Oprah Winfrey?

  Many of them are gone. I counted the other day of all those, 12 of them are now gone. It was extravagant, but it still wasn't enough.

• 10:24Speaker 01

  There was a moment that was so special. I remember you had commissioned Pearl Clige to write a poem about the legends.

• 10:31Oprah Winfrey?

  Yes, yes, yes.

• 10:32Speaker 01

  And I built a thrust on the end of the stage that was three tiers that had the 40 youngins standing on them.

• 10:39Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah.

• 10:39Speaker 01

  And while they were presenting the poem, Angela Bassett started her part of the poem. Right? And I looked behind me and every single one of the legends had tears in their eyes.

• 10:52Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah.

• 10:52Speaker 01

  I knew that moment that you had achieved the goal.

• 10:55Oprah Winfrey?

  Yes.

• 10:55Speaker 01

  You let these ladies really feel loved, respected. They had their place in history and it's exactly what you'd set out to do.

• 11:03Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah, you know what's interesting afterwards? Maya said to me, Maya Angelou said, just to be thanked, to be acknowledged and to be thanked. Because they all had gone through their entire lives and done extraordinary things. But to be thanked in a setting with the younger generation, who had benefited from all of the extraordinary.

• 11:27Speaker 01

  Because of their journey, they paved the way for them.

• 11:29Oprah Winfrey?

  Been through, yeah. And we took this gorgeous photo with the legends and the youngins on the front lawn. Kwaku did that. It was not an easy thing to shoot, black women.

• 11:39Speaker 01

  With the sun facing behind you.

• 11:42Oprah Winfrey?

  With the sun behind us, but he did an incredible job. That still is one of my favorite photos of life.

• 11:48Speaker 01

  Do you remember the moment?

• 11:49Oprah Winfrey?

  What was it like getting all those women together? And you figured out a way for us to get, so that's my house in the center, for us to get from my house down there without having everybody have to walk down the lawn.

• 11:59Speaker 01

  Well, I said to you, why don't we go to San Francisco and buy a tram? And we'll make it the promised land tram.

• 12:04Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah.

• 12:04Speaker 01

  And that's exactly how we got the ladies to come down. We had 60 stand-ins who sat in every single position to make sure that, you know, a photo shoot like this can take a day to do. From the time they sat down to the time they left was 20 minutes.

• 12:18Oprah Winfrey?

  And not only that.

• 12:19Speaker 01

  And that was extraordinary.

• 12:21Oprah Winfrey?

  I know, but the moment Kwaku had taken like four shots, Maya was going, all right, that's enough, that's enough. And I go, enough? We just got here. Maya, we just got here. I mean, that is incredible.

• 12:32Speaker 01

  And then we went from there to that extraordinary lunch. But when you look at this collection of the most extraordinary faces and people, I mean, this is history.

• 12:41Oprah Winfrey?

  I know, but that entire bench, look, Dela Reese, Cicely Tyson, Ruby Dee, they're all gone.

• 12:45Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 12:46Oprah Winfrey?

  Tina Turner, gone. And look, Coretta Scott King, gone. Maya Angelou, gone. Roberta Flack, gone. Naomi Sims, gone.

• 12:54Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 12:54Oprah Winfrey?

  It's unbelievable, unbelievable.

• 12:56Speaker 01

  Aren't you happy you did that?

• 12:58Oprah Winfrey?

  It is the greatest thing, I think, I ever did.

• 13:04Speaker 01

  It was history.

• 13:05Oprah Winfrey?

  I could start crying. I mean, I wasn't trying to make history. I really was just trying to have a party to say thank you to all of these women. And.

• 13:14Speaker 01

  I also remember you telling me once before in one of our many, many, many phone calls that the reason you wanted to do this, you've been asked to speak at so many eulogies.

• 13:22Oprah Winfrey?

  Yes.

• 13:22Speaker 01

  And you wanted these ladies to understand while they were living.

• 13:25Oprah Winfrey?

  While they were living.

• 13:26Speaker 01

  To let them understand how much they were loved and appreciated.

• 13:28Oprah Winfrey?

  Flowers and their diamonds and their accolades and their praise while they were still living. You know what I realized? Colin did a whole book for me of the extraordinary events we've had. And what I realized is I've never had a party for myself.

• 13:42Speaker 01

  Oh, it's not because we didn't try.

• 13:45Oprah Winfrey?

  Every time we tried to have a party for me, I was like, no, no, no. I have a, I.

• 13:49Speaker 01

  The 50th, we nailed completely.

• 13:51Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah, but I didn't have that party. I didn't have that party. Marlene and Bob Bellows had that party for me and I wouldn't have done it. We tried to have a 60th.

• 14:00Speaker 01

  I remember you sent me to Fiji to go on La Sala Island to go and plan this fabulous party. We canceled that one. And then do you remember we were planning your 60th birthday? We designed the tents, we'd done everything.

• 14:11Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah.

• 14:12Speaker 01

  And the guesters got bigger.

• 14:13Oprah Winfrey?

  And bigger. I ended up canceling then.

• 14:15Speaker 01

  I think you had six people for dinner.

• 14:17Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah, I was having six people for dinner. Then for my 70th, we were going to do, I wanted to do it in a forest. I wanted to do it in the redwoods.

• 14:24Speaker 01

  In the redwood forest.

• 14:25Oprah Winfrey?

  Yes.

• 14:25Speaker 01

  That was the one party we planned. Then we planned another party in the studio. And then at the last minute, unfortunately, that didn't happen.

• 14:32Oprah Winfrey?

  That didn't happen. I've never had a party for myself, but I love having parties for other people.

• 14:36Speaker 01

  I'm the same. I think we're natural givers in life.

• 14:39Oprah Winfrey?

  Yes, yes.

• 14:40Speaker 01

  I'd rather do a party for someone else or give them to someone else than do it for myself.

• 14:45Oprah Winfrey?

  Maybe you're feeling it too with so many ways to reach each other. It can be easy to mistake being reachable for being truly connected. But I've learned that what many people are longing for is just to be heard, truly heard by another person. That's what we're trying to do here on the Oprah Podcast. I see you contemplating and I can see that you're seeing yourself a different way after he said that. Making space for real connection. Because every time we stop and actually listen to each other, something shifts. Something opens. AT&T believes that too. The right connection at the right moment between the right people can change the course of a day,

• 15:31Oprah Winfrey?

  a relationship and even a whole life. So the next time you reach for your phone to call someone you love, know that AT&T is with you, keeping that connection strong. Because AT&T is there when the connection matters. And connecting changes everything.

• 15:56Oprah Winfrey?

  Colin planned Gail's 50th and 70th birthday parties and she's joining us now. Hey, Gail, Colin's here.

• 16:02Speaker 02

  Oh, my gosh, guys. I've been going crazy listening to this conversation because it has brought back so many great memories.

• 16:09Oprah Winfrey?

  Isn't it?

• 16:10Speaker 02

  Colin, it's so good to see you.

• 16:11Speaker 01

  Always a pleasure.

• 16:12Speaker 02

  I left Colin saying, then I just got the idea of let's go to San Francisco and get a trolley. And then you call it the promised, like that's fricking normal. Let's go get a trolley.

• 16:22Speaker 01

  Well, we had to get, you couldn't use a car.

• 16:24Oprah Winfrey?

  You couldn't use a car and you couldn't have a bunches of golf carts and you couldn't, how are you going to get them down there?

• 16:29Speaker 02

  Of course, you have to go to San Francisco and get a trolley.

• 16:32Oprah Winfrey?

  Get a trolley.

• 16:33Speaker 02

  The promised land trolley.

• 16:34Oprah Winfrey?

  A trolley.

• 16:35Speaker 02

  Oh, but boy, guys, this conversation has brought back so many great memories. I remember Colin, after Legends, Oprah and I had Legends Ball withdrawal.

• 16:45Oprah Winfrey?

  Yes.

• 16:45Speaker 02

  Because there was so much meeting, there were so many meetings and so much planning. And the Sunday after, we normally met on a Tuesday. It was like, oh, my God, what are we going to do?

• 16:56Oprah Winfrey?

  What are we going to do?

• 16:57Speaker 01

  I call it post-party depression.

• 16:59Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah, it was definitely post-party depression. Gail, I know you, Gail loves being in charge of the seating chart because she has such an affinity for actually putting people together. But that was a hard party to seat.

• 17:12Speaker 01

  But I think that's the key to. Yeah, I think that's the key to any good party.

• 17:15Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah, that is the key.

• 17:16Speaker 01

  Any really smart host, hostess will spend hours and hours agonizing to make sure not only of the right people at the table, but the rot people seated next to the right people.

• 17:26Oprah Winfrey?

  Absolutely.

• 17:27Speaker 01

  And it takes forever to do.

• 17:29Speaker 02

  I don't know if you remember this, we had the seating all done and then we got word, Tom Cruise is coming. Tom Cruise is coming. I've already done the seating.

• 17:37Speaker 01

  And it's a domino effect.

• 17:39Oprah Winfrey?

  I know, Gail, Tom Cruise is coming. Find a place for Tom Cruise, will you please?

• 17:43Speaker 02

  Yes, all I could think of was, oh, no, it's going to, of course, we wanted Tom Cruise because we were nuts about Tom Cruise. But of course, then it just throws all the seats.

• 17:51Oprah Winfrey?

  It's going to mess up my seating.

• 17:53Speaker 02

  Colin, it was the best. I mean, just listening to you and Oprah relive the moments. I have that photo too of the women, of all of us on the lawn.

• 18:01Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah, that's in your office.

• 18:02Speaker 02

  I look at it every day.

• 18:03Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah.

• 18:03Speaker 02

  And Oprah, I clock it too. Boy, so and so is no longer here, so and so. I'm so glad we had that moment.

• 18:08Oprah Winfrey?

  But we were talking about Colin's book, The Gold Standard. He really does hold a gold, whatever is beyond gold, is platinum beyond gold? I don't know. He holds.

• 18:19Speaker 01

  Gold's good for now.

• 18:20Oprah Winfrey?

  Gold's good for now. He really has the gold standard because I was saying to him.

• 18:24Speaker 02

  Nobody like him. Nobody.

• 18:25Oprah Winfrey?

  Nobody like him because every party tells its own story. And you leave not only feeling elevated, but you leave with the feeling like the party was just for you.

• 18:36Speaker 02

  But what I love too.

• 18:37Speaker 01

  That's why intention is so important.

• 18:38Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah.

• 18:39Speaker 02

  But Colin, what you have too is your enthusiasm is infectious. You know, for every single party, no detail is too small. Nothing is too big. Nothing is too big, you know? The sky is not the limit. For you, the sky is just the view. That's kind of where you start.

• 18:56Speaker 01

  I'll take that.

• 18:57Speaker 02

  Yeah, but it really is true. And it's the type of thing that you just think. I remember Colin said, you know, darling, there's just gonna be JDMs all over the place. And I'm like, JDM, jaw dropping moments, of course. And you do that time after time after time after time.

• 19:16Oprah Winfrey?

  No, but no detail, you're right, Gail. No detail is too small. I remember when we're literally trying, planning the beads on the tablecloth to match the napkins, to match the plates, because we had the plate. It's just all so.

• 19:29Speaker 01

  The handstool bead at the bottom of every single napkin. Or is it something you're gonna touch for an hour and a half?

• 19:34Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah.

• 19:35Speaker 02

  Oprah talks about Colin, but Colin, you know this too. Sister Girl is very detail oriented too.

• 19:40Oprah Winfrey?

  Yes, I'm very detailed.

• 19:42Speaker 01

  I think that's why we've been a match made in heaven when it's come to planning these events.

• 19:46Speaker 02

  Yeah, the two of you together are a really great team.

• 19:49Oprah Winfrey?

  So 10 years later, we did another historical ball called Legends Who Paved the Way. We honored civil rights icons like Sidney Poitier and Quincy Jones and John Lewis. We were focusing on all the men. We did this for the release of Ava DuVernay's movie Selma. And we had all of these men legends too. And once again, you transformed a ballroom into the most incredible space. I mean, Colin has his way. I mean, I go into a ballroom at a hotel and I think, this looks pretty good to me. And Colin's like, no, darling, we must move the floors and bring in the, I mean.

• 20:22Speaker 01

  Well, that was for Legends. We had to do that because you didn't want anyone to have a backseat. No one should be seated in Siberia. So on the outsides of the ballroom, we elevated them so they had a better.

• 20:32Oprah Winfrey?

  So everybody had a better seat.

• 20:34Speaker 01

  We wanted everyone to feel like they were front row.

• 20:36Speaker 02

  I can remember, is the carpet that bad, Colin? No one's even gonna see the floor. Oh, no, no, no, it must go.

• 20:41Oprah Winfrey?

  Darling, we must change the carpet. We had an awe inspiring gospel brunch. What made that celebration so special for you?

• 20:50Speaker 01

  For me, the brunch was unbelievable. And when the BB one and started in classic BB, then I think he handed the microphone to Gladys Knight.

• 20:59Speaker 02

  Patty LaBelle.

• 21:01Speaker 01

  To every single person. I mean, it was unbelievable. I'd never ever seen anything like that in my life before.

• 21:07Oprah Winfrey?

  I don't think anybody's ever seen anything like that.

• 21:08Speaker 01

  It was the most epic ending to the most extraordinary we can imaginable. And we had nothing to do with it, really.

• 21:14Oprah Winfrey?

  And not one, this is what I think now when I see this thing on YouTube. Not one single moment was rehearsed. And the fact that he handed every microphone to her. So this is a funny thing, story you all didn't know, is that Barbara Streisand was there. And I saw Barbara Streisand in the, she kept moving further and further and further away. And I went over to say to Barbara, what's going on? And she goes, well, I don't want him handing the mic to me. And I go, well, he's not gonna hand the mic to you because he knows you don't know that gospel song.

• 21:45Speaker 01

  And the other one who was walking in the other direction was Mariah.

• 21:47Oprah Winfrey?

  Mariah was like, no.

• 21:48Speaker 01

  She's, I'm saving my voice for Tuesday on the show.

• 21:50Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah, that was so much fun. What is most memorable for you, Gail?

• 21:54Speaker 02

  I marvel, Colin, at how you personalize everything. And I don't know how you get all the ideas that you get to make everything feel so different and so special. You know, my 50th and my 70th, you know, you had little Gales and, which I saved them. And it had little things like, I'm so glad you're here or cheers to life.

• 22:14Speaker 01

  You did the cutouts of every, of your, every single place.

• 22:17Speaker 02

  It's good to see you.

• 22:18Oprah Winfrey?

  This is what I want to say, that Gail, so I had a surprise. I didn't have a 70th for myself, but I had a surprise 70th for Gail at our favorite restaurant. And Gail thought we were just gonna go have dinner at that restaurant. And when she walked in inside everybody, she threw, she threw.

• 22:35Speaker 01

  It was unbelievable.

• 22:36Oprah Winfrey?

  That was an unbelievable moment.

• 22:37Speaker 01

  You were really, really genuinely 100% surprised.

• 22:40Oprah Winfrey?

  What's your happiest memory from your 70th, Gail? What's your happiest memory from your 70th?

• 22:44Speaker 02

  I was surprised by the number of people that came because my birthday is December 28th. It's in December, right around holiday. So I'm always worried about infringing on people's time and, you know, inconveniencing people. So I was, it was earlier than the 28th, but it was still, you know, holiday season. People are following a line, going away. I was just amazed and touched by the number of people that came out.

• 23:07Speaker 01

  Everybody showed up for you.

• 23:09Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah.

• 23:09Speaker 02

  They were so nice. But Colin, you just make it so special. Great food, great people, beautiful space. It doesn't get any better than that.

• 23:17Speaker 01

  Gail?

• 23:18Speaker 02

  You always have a unique surprise, always.

• 23:20Speaker 01

  Speaking of food, do you remember the moment when we at Legends, we were doing the tastings?

• 23:25Oprah Winfrey?

  Oh, my gosh. Where we got drunk. Where we came completely intoxicated.

• 23:31Speaker 01

  We tasted three different champagnes, four different cocktails. Then came the menu, we tasted the different whites and the different reds. I think we all got completely smashed.

• 23:38Oprah Winfrey?

  I was smashed. Gail wasn't smashed, she never drinks. Take a look at this clip. This is so funny.

• 23:43Speaker 02

  Now let's try this wine. I had to sample the wine, sample the martini, sample the champagne. Love it, love it, love it. Palini Montreche.

• 23:50Speaker 01

  Can we talk about the fact that we had seven wines to taste and three champagnes and four cocktails?

• 23:55Speaker 02

  Stunning.

• 23:55Speaker 01

  By the end of the thing, we were completely wasted. Sending ovation to you all.

• 24:02Oprah Winfrey?

  John George, not to mention, we had John George as the show.

• 24:06Speaker 02

  John George himself. I wouldn't know a good wine if it came and hit me over the head. Oprah goes, you know, they have better wines in Boones Farm Strawberry Hill. That was the last time I had it in high school. You know, you can up your game a little bit.

• 24:18Oprah Winfrey?

  You're dating yourself, Gail. Boones Farm Strawberry Hill. Thanks, Gail. Thanks for going down memory lane with.

• 24:24Speaker 01

  It was so much fun.

• 24:25Oprah Winfrey?

  Thank you, good to see you.

• 24:27Speaker 02

  Bye, you guys.

• 24:27Oprah Winfrey?

  Bye.

• 24:28Speaker 02

  Leaving meeting.

• 24:29Oprah Winfrey?

  Leaving. You dedicate the gold standard to your housekeeper of 25 years, Gertrude. Tell us why. I was really struck by that because it means no matter where you are in life, you can offer the gold standard for yourself. And you were saying that from the time you hired her until she retired at 75, she was always 100% there for you with the gold standard.

• 24:55Speaker 01

  This is my 11th book and I always leave the introduction to the last thing that I write.

• 25:01Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah.

• 25:01Speaker 01

  So I thought, was it the QE2? Was it the Concorde? Was it the Ritz in Paris? Or was it this great hotel experience? And I thought, no, this is the service that I've had in my home for 25 years. And she was the most, is the most extraordinary woman. And I thought she went out of her way to always make sure that I was able to live my best life possible. And was the best form of proactive customer service. And I think that that's the whole difference in life is because the reason I wrote the book, and I'm sure you agree with me, we don't need another product. We don't need another service. The world is oversaturated. So we need to figure out how do we stand out in the crowd? And how do we grab attention in a saturated market?

• 25:45Speaker 01

  Because the goal is always to be emotionally connected.

• 25:48Oprah Winfrey?

  How do you create an event, whether it's at your home or someplace else, that is emotionally connected, that has the spirit of emotion in it? Yes.

• 25:59Speaker 01

  So here's a good example because proactive actually means, how can we use a bit of data, information and technology? Find out about you and create a guest experience where we get to anticipate your unanticipated needs.

• 26:13Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah.

• 26:14Speaker 01

  Like for instance, we know that you like tequila. You've got great dogs. You recently had a birthday. If you go and check into a hotel and the hotel knows that you're coming and they've done a bit of their homework and you find your favorite tequila in the minibar, you find a little red velvet birthday cake, your favorite flavor of cake. And you find a little picture frame next to the bed of the dogs that you left behind. You think, these people have really gone the whole, a lot of their way to make me comfortable and to be, you're welcome. And that is the emotional connection.

• 26:44Oprah Winfrey?

  One of the things that I love, and you say this in the gold standard, is that you're trying to create an experience that the people didn't even know they wanted.

• 26:52Speaker 01

  That's the magic.

• 26:53Oprah Winfrey?

  That's the magic.

• 26:54Speaker 01

  And when you get to do that, that's when you create the emotional connection. And we know that anyone who is selling anything, a brand or a service, the emotionally connected person is the most valuable person you have because they're not price sensitive. They're happy to receive information from you. And most importantly, they tell their friends about you at dinner.

• 27:13Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 27:14Speaker 01

  You can't pay for that.

• 27:15Oprah Winfrey?

  Okay, so most people aren't gonna be able to obviously afford a Colin Cowie event, but you can create the spirit of emotion and create the spirit of connection by holding yourself to your own gold standard. What is your number one piece of advice for someone at home who loves entertaining? Who wants to create a party? Who wants to create a special event for their daughter's graduation, their son's wedding, whatever?

• 27:42Speaker 01

  Obsess over the details.

• 27:44Oprah Winfrey?

  Obsess.

• 27:45Speaker 01

  Get completely obsessed over each and every one of the details. Because at the end of the day, you know, if you're hosting anything, it's all about how I make you feel, right? So using those ideas of what you smell, touch, taste, see and hear. And I think that luxury today is when all those senses are in harmony with one another.

• 28:02Oprah Winfrey?

  Can I say too, I think that with you, and this has been my experience, particularly with the Legends Ball, because it all started with the invitation. You know, it was an incredible invitation, you know, in a box. But even if you don't have that, the invitation sets the tone for what is to come and allows you to get excited, you know, about what's coming.

• 28:27Speaker 01

  And there are so many ways to do an invitation today. It doesn't have to come in a box, right? It can come in the form of a text, it can come for paperless post or green envelope or any of those online platforms. But I think it's the first thing that you're going to see, right? So make sure it's worded correctly. Make sure that it's inclusive. And if you really don't know how to write really well, go to ChatGPT. Tell ChatGPT, I really want to make these people feel extremely welcome and happy. This is the reason I'm having the party. Give me copy and five lines.

• 28:56Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah, interesting.

• 28:57Speaker 01

  It's a great way to do it and anyone can do it and everyone has access to that.

• 29:00Oprah Winfrey?

  You don't have to sit and figure it out yourself. We were trying to figure it all out ourselves.

• 29:04Speaker 01

  And we used to, we'd sit there and work for two to three days on the copy. It's the best way to do it. And I also think we all know how to express ourselves in terms of how we look, the clothes that you wear, who cuts your hair. But I think the best way to portray or to find out anyone's sense of style is how they receive you in their home and how they entertain. And I think that you have to use your things, right? You have, you don't keep anything for special. And I think great style really comes from how you treat yourself. And you don't have to have a lot of money.

• 29:34Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah.

• 29:34Speaker 01

  It's about, you know, how do you make your bed? It's about how do you keep your closet organized? It's about how do you use your things? How do you make sure that you anticipate?

• 29:42Oprah Winfrey?

  And you use your things.

• 29:43Speaker 01

  You've got to use your things. And I learned that in the north.

• 29:46Oprah Winfrey?

  Don't be saving your things.

• 29:48Speaker 01

  I learned that in the Northridge earthquake. My good champagne, my good glasses, all my good things were on the top shelves. And those were the first things that broke. And from that day onwards, my best silver is in the dishwasher. I use it every day. I use my best china every single day. I wear my best clothes and I wear my suede shoes in the rain because tomorrow a bus could knock you over and you never got to use your things.

• 30:11Oprah Winfrey?

  You wear your suede shoes in the rain?

• 30:13Speaker 01

  You have to enjoy life every day and live it like it's your last. And I do, I run my home like a little mini hotel.

• 30:20Oprah Winfrey?

  Well, that brings us back to Gertrude. One of the reasons why she was such a wonderful person to work with and for you is because she took care of you. Flowers from the market, knowing what you liked, paying attention to what was important to you.

• 30:36Speaker 01

  We were a team. We were such an incredible team. And she knew that, listen, I think if you write about things, you have to do them, right? You have got to live, you've got to live your life completely.

• 30:48Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah.

• 30:48Speaker 01

  I could never have lived my life without her. And she dedicated 25 years of her life to me so that I could live this way.

• 30:56Oprah Winfrey?

  So you come home and the beds turned down and the things?

• 30:58Speaker 01

  I could be in Hong Kong and I could say that I'm going to be home tomorrow afternoon at 5 o'clock. We need 12 people for dinner. She knew exactly where to go and get books. I taught her. She knew where to go and get the awkward. She knew how to set the table. She knew how to prepare the food. She knew how to do the turn down. She knew that I liked the sheets iron. She knew that while I was away, that was the opportunity to polish the silver and to fill the freezer with soups that I could serve myself on the weekend when she wasn't there.

• 31:23Oprah Winfrey?

  Oh, I love that.

• 31:24Speaker 01

  So I really, really learned and I taught her and she taught me many, many wonderful things. And, you know, she played such an important role in my life that when I walked down the aisle and I got married, I had her in a Naim Khan gown. And you're going to love this because Gertrude was like five foot six. So I found her platforms like this. I gave them to her two weeks before. I said, learn to walk in these because you're coming down the aisle. You can't be the shortest one.

• 31:50Oprah Winfrey?

  Oh, my gosh, that's so lovely. That's so lovely.

• 31:53Speaker 01

  And, you know, after 25 years, she went back to go and live in Poland. Not a month goes by that we don't speak. She'll be back here in July and I'll celebrate her 18th birthday for her.

• 32:03Oprah Winfrey?

  That is wonderful.

• 32:04Speaker 01

  I cannot do enough for that lady because she dedicated so much of her life to me. And that's why I dedicated the book to her. She was my gold standard.

• 32:12Oprah Winfrey?

  She was your gold standard. It's so interesting, too. I've learned so much from you about wearing your suede shoes in the rain, using all your good stuff. Don't save anything. If you've got your so-called good dishes, use the good dishes for you yourself. You always told me that. Tina Turner, the first time I went to her house, she said, Oprah, dress for dinner if it's only you. And so I dress for dinner, even if it's my pajamas. I dress for dinner. Dress for dinner, even if it's only you.

• 32:41Speaker 01

  I did that during the pandemic. During the pandemic, I said, okay, who's doing the ironing and who's polishing silver? And let's wear shiny shoes tonight and let's get dressed. And I think, you know, great style comes from how you treat yourself.

• 32:54Oprah Winfrey?

  Great style comes from how you treat yourself.

• 32:57Speaker 01

  Because if you know how to treat yourself, you know how to treat others.

• 33:00Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah.

• 33:01Speaker 01

  And it's, you know, it's self-respect, mutual respect and respect for other people. I love having guests come to stay with me. I love having guests come for dinner. I think for days how when I set the table and I'm to tabletop, what Imelda Marcus was to shoes.

• 33:17Speaker 01

  I can't resist a dish. I can't resist a set of plates. I'd rather buy a set of plates and a pair of shoes because I can share the plates with so many people.

• 33:24Oprah Winfrey?

  That's right. That's right. That's right. I often ask this question and it's apropos for you. What does it mean, Colin Cowie, to live a well-lived life? What does a well-lived life look like?

• 33:37Speaker 01

  I think a well-lived life means that you really care about yourself. You care about the people around you. You care how you wake up in the morning. I like to make sure that everything that I own is looked after and respected. My closet is immaculate all times. I never put the shoes, I leave my shoes on the ground or drop clothes on the floor. I always pick them up and I put them where they need to be.

• 34:00Oprah Winfrey?

  Because there's something about that order that brings order to your brain.

• 34:03Speaker 01

  I love sense of order because when I open a drawer and everything is in the right place, I know where to find it. I think I might have a bit of self-diagnosed ADD and other three syllable issues.

• 34:13Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah.

• 34:13Speaker 01

  So I tend to thrive on order. And I think it looks beautiful as well. That way you know exactly where you can find something. If I open up the freezer, I like to, or the refrigerator, all the bottles go from left to right, from smallest to largest. The vegetables are in these containers. The same thing with the closet, the same with anything that I have.

• 34:31Oprah Winfrey?

  So you not only write about the gold standard and do it in all of your parties and events, but you create it in your own spaces also?

• 34:37Speaker 01

  You live the gold standard.

• 34:38Oprah Winfrey?

  You live the gold standard.

• 34:39Speaker 01

  And the gold standard comes from how you respect yourself.

• 34:42Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah.

• 34:43Speaker 01

  And if you take care of yourself, then you know how to take care of others. I think that's how you live the life.

• 34:48Oprah Winfrey?

  Okay, so I know you've done, how, do you even know how many parties you've done all over the world?

• 34:54Speaker 01

  I have no clue, but I know that it's taken me 17 million miles around the world.

• 34:58Oprah Winfrey?

  17 million? You have 17 million miles?

• 35:01Speaker 01

  17 million miles and I've visited almost 100 countries. I have a very curious nature and I really feel amazing to be the storyteller for so many people. And when you think about it, they trust you.

• 35:12Oprah Winfrey?

  And you see yourself as a storyteller more than a party or event planner?

• 35:17Speaker 01

  Oh, definitely, definitely. Because an event planner, you know, it's a food, it's the menu, it's this, that or the next thing. As the storyteller, I want to understand what is your DNA? What is the objective behind this?

• 35:28Oprah Winfrey?

  What is the story we want to tell in this event? Yes.

• 35:30Speaker 01

  Exactly. What do you want your guests to feel when they walk out of here?

• 35:34Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 35:35Speaker 01

  And along the way, have a couple of?

• 35:37Oprah Winfrey?

  I bet you've got some stories to tell about, you've got lots of stories to tell. That you can't tell. That you can't, that you cannot even tell. Because I will just say, when we did the Legends Ball, uh, and we had all of those very famous, uh, A-list, high-powered women, the writers were just unbelievable.

• 36:00Speaker 01

  I wrote you a list afterwards and I said, these are the five top people we should invite to the next party.

• 36:08Speaker 01

  I never share that list with anyone else, just so you know.

• 36:11Oprah Winfrey?

  I know, and I'm not sharing it either.

• 36:13Speaker 01

  But I have to say, you know, the star power that you had at that event, when you looked around you, you recognized every single person in the room. The Academy Awards gives you celebrity.

• 36:25Oprah Winfrey?

  Yeah.

• 36:25Speaker 01

  This gave you a 360 of the best and the finest and the greatest.

• 36:29Oprah Winfrey?

  Yes, they really were legends. Yes, yeah, legends.

• 36:34Speaker 01

  It's still my number one event in the whole world. And nobody ever did anything like that again. I've thrown bigger and more expensive and glamorous, but nothing ever really was history. You made history with that.

• 36:46Oprah Winfrey?

  Hmm. I think that's the thing that's so interesting to me, that that was history, but the intention never was about history. It was just about giving back a little piece of what I thought I'd been given from all of those women, and you made that possible. I don't know anybody else who could have done it the way that you did it.

• 37:04Speaker 01

  I think we were a great team.

• 37:05Oprah Winfrey?

  I think we were a great team.

• 37:07Speaker 01

  And I think we're both givers. We both love to take care of other people, more so than ourselves.

• 37:12Oprah Winfrey?

  Well, thank you for the gold standard, always.

• 37:14Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 37:15Oprah Winfrey?

  Colin Cowie's book is called The Gold Standard: Giving Your Customers What They Didn't Know They Wanted. It's available wherever books are sold. Thank you, my friend. We'll see you next time. And maybe one day I'll have a party for myself.

• 37:28Speaker 01

  Not for want to try.

• 37:31Oprah Winfrey?

  Colin Cowie's The Gold Standard: Giving Your Customers What They Didn't Know They Wanted is the ultimate guide for your next dinner party or event. Or maybe you know someone in your life who loves to entertain. This book is a great gift for them. Scan the QR code on the screen to get yourself a copy. The Gold Standard. Our listeners tell us that the podcast is resonating with you and is serving as a bright spot in your day. That means a lot to me. So here's the thing, I would really appreciate it if you like and subscribe to the Oprah Podcast on YouTube or wherever you podcast. It's just a quick tap of the subscribe button. And that way you won't miss an episode in your queue.

• 38:15Oprah Winfrey?

  You don't have to pay anything. I know subscribe usually means you're paying something, but this time it means you just are notified when there's something new. There are many more to come that we're excited about. So thank you for watching and listening.