MFM Minisode 503

This week’s hometowns include a Children of the Corn-style child labor story and St. Paddy’s Day snake party. For our sources, please visit https://www.myfavoritemurder.com/episodes. Support this podcast by shopping our latest sponsor deals and promotions at this link: https://bit.ly/3UFCn1g. Head to social media to share your favorite moments from this episode. Instagram: instagram.com/myfavoritemurder http://instagram.com/myfavoritemurder Facebook: facebook.com/myfavoritemurder http://facebook.com/myfavoritemurder TikTok: tiktok.com/@my_favorite_murder http://tiktok.com/@my_favorite_murder Send your hometown stories to [email protected] mailto:[email protected]. Join the Fan Cult to access ad-free episodes of My Favorite Murder. Members also receive merch store discounts, exclusive audio and video content and more! Visit www.fancult.supercast.com http://www.fancult.supercast.com/ to join. Shop for My Favorite Murder and other Exactly Right merchandise here: www.exactlyrightstore.com https://www.exactlyrightstore.com. Rate, review and follow My Favorite Murder on the iHeartRadio, Apple Podcasts, Spotify or wherever you like to listen. See omnystudio.com/listener https://omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:01Speaker 00

  This is exactly right.

• 0:07Speaker 00

  911, what's your emergency?

• 0:09Speaker 01

  Please help us, they're everywhere. We think they're murder hornets. 911 Nashville returns.

• 0:17Speaker 02

  It's a homicide detective down here.

• 0:19Speaker 03

  Three bodies on the ground.

• 0:20Speaker 01

  With emergencies of biblical proportions.

• 0:23Speaker 03

  Hell, since swarms upon you and upon your people.

• 0:26Speaker 02

  That's one of the plagues of the Bible.

• 0:27Speaker 03

  And somebody's unleashing them on Nashville.

• 0:30Speaker 01

  Brian Phillippe, 911 Nashville. All new Thursdays on ABC, next day on Hulu.

• 0:37Speaker 00

  Whether you're buying, renting, or selling, Zillow can help make your someday today. To help find a home that fits where you are in life, or that apartment that's a little closer to where you want to be. Zillow has the right information, tools, and support to help turn your future home into a reality. Because someday starts today. Visit zillow.com/today to get started.

• 1:02Speaker 04

  OnDeck is built to back small businesses like yours. Whether you're buying equipment, expanding your team, or bridging cash flow gaps, OnDeck's loans up to $400,000 help make it happen fast. Rated A+ by the Better Business Bureau and earning thousands of 5-star TrustPilot reviews, OnDeck delivers funding you can count on. Apply in minutes at ondeck.com. Depending on certain loan attributes, your business loan may be issued by OnDeck or Celtic Bank. OnDeck does not lend in North Dakota. All loans in amount subject to lender approval.

• 1:47Karen Kilgariff?

  Hello.

• 1:49Georgia Hardstark?

  Hello.

• 1:49Karen Kilgariff?

  And welcome.

• 1:50Georgia Hardstark?

  To my favorite murder.

• 1:51Karen Kilgariff?

  The minisode.

• 1:52Georgia Hardstark?

  We read you, your stories.

• 1:54Karen Kilgariff?

  And emails.

• 1:55Georgia Hardstark?

  And emails. And stories of emails.

• 1:57Karen Kilgariff?

  Stories where you're writing emails to us.

• 2:00Georgia Hardstark?

  Thoughts and feelings about email.

• 2:03Georgia Hardstark?

  You're first, I'm first.

• 2:04Karen Kilgariff?

  Whatever you want.

• 2:05Georgia Hardstark?

  I'll go first.

• 2:06Karen Kilgariff?

  Okay.

• 2:06Georgia Hardstark?

  So this was an email that I found when I was researching back for episode 544, where I covered the Paul Franzak disappearance, the baby who was kidnapped as a literal, like, two-day-old from the hospital.

• 2:20Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah.

• 2:20Georgia Hardstark?

  So it's called, "Was My Dad Adopted or Stolen at Birth?"

• 2:24Karen Kilgariff?

  Wow.

• 2:25Georgia Hardstark?

  "Hey, best pals, I've been putting this email together in my head for months now, so here we go. My dad Jeff was a wild dude and lived life fast and extreme. When I was young, I would ask him to tell me his craziest stories. He'd paint beautiful pictures of his younger self, convincing the cops to buy him and his friends beers and smoking doobies on their way to their fifth Rolling Stones concert. Just regular bedtime stories every father tells his daughter, right? As I got older, and because I've always been a murderino at heart, these stories slowly became more murdery, like how his friend Ray was acquitted for the murder of his wife in 1996, but everyone in town knows that he probably did it. But that's not the story I'm here to tell you today.

• 3:10Georgia Hardstark?

  Sadly, my larger-than-life dad died of colon cancer complications this past February. At his celebration of life, we were all telling stories with tears in our eyes. Then out of nowhere, my dad's cousin Donna says, 'I always remember us making fun of Jeff for being that stolen baby from Chicago.' Man, he hated that. Come again, first cousin once removed, Donna? What came next was the unfolding of my dad's final wild story, the one that was so good, he didn't want to tell me in person. He wanted me to do the digging myself. So it says, "Everyone knew my dad was adopted. This is something that he never really cared about. He would always say, in a very South Side, Chicago accent, 'My ma's my ma, and dad's my dad.' That's all that should matter to you guys.

• 3:53Georgia Hardstark?

  My dad was born and adopted on April 24, 1964, by my grandparents. On that same day, Paul Joseph Franzak was stolen from a Chicago hospital by a woman dressed as a nurse."

• 4:04Karen Kilgariff?

  Same day.

• 4:04Georgia Hardstark?

  Same day. And then he was adopted, so it's so suspicious. Like, look at all the people who adopted babies on that exact day, who were born there, and you'll find who took them.

• 4:15Karen Kilgariff?

  The turnaround, though.

• 4:15Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 4:16Karen Kilgariff?

  Turnaround. That's very true.

• 4:17Georgia Hardstark?

  But that turnaround is like, wouldn't you think that the person... Would keep it for... Yeah, exactly. Well, it's not. "This launched a huge manhunt and baby search. The FBI tested and examined over 10,000 babies, one of which was my dad. They came back multiple times to examine my dad and took multiple hair and blood samples. The authorities were highly suspicious of my grandparents as they weren't my dad's biological parents, and their lawyer was under suspicion of black market adoptions."

• 4:41Karen Kilgariff?

  Oh.

• 4:42Georgia Hardstark?

  It says, "Uh, okay." And then it goes on to say, "It's clearly not him. It dried up. Another baby was found to be him, but it wasn't."

• 4:49Karen Kilgariff?

  Obviously.

• 4:50Georgia Hardstark?

  This is a story I told.

• 4:51Karen Kilgariff?

  Obviously, it wouldn't be him, because you would have told that during your actual story.

• 4:55Georgia Hardstark?

  Right.

• 4:55Karen Kilgariff?

  I don't know what the... I'm just like, why does it isn't him?

• 4:58Georgia Hardstark?

  It's suspicious. So, episode 544 is where you can read, you can hear about that story. And then, this email goes on to say that she's been reading Paul Franzak's book called "The Foundling," which he wrote. And then she says, "This has been such a comforting way for me to cope with the loss of my dad. Only murderinos get it. Thank you for giving my dad's story a voice. It means more to me than you will ever know. I've been on the hunt for my dad's biofamily because in my grief, that's just what feels right." So, murderino fam, if you know anyone born in that timeframe with the last name Schwerer, S-C-H-W-E-R-E-R, hit me up.

• 5:35Karen Kilgariff?

  Wow.

• 5:36Georgia Hardstark?

  And of course, a huge "you" rule for normalizing mental health issues and everything that comes with it. If Prozac is your bestie, say, "Hey!"

• 5:46Georgia Hardstark?

  "Stay sexy and hug your dad for me, Ally." So it's Ally Schwerer. Check it, I mean, if you know something, look her up.

• 5:54Karen Kilgariff?

  Get onto our Discord.

• 5:56Georgia Hardstark?

  Or message me, yeah.

• 5:56Karen Kilgariff?

  Solve this.

• 5:57Georgia Hardstark?

  Message us. 559.

• 6:02Karen Kilgariff?

  Call the hotline, we've just had it installed.

• 6:05Georgia Hardstark?

  Isn't that crazy?

• 6:06Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah, that's wild.

• 6:07Georgia Hardstark?

  So, thank you, Ally, for your info. And then, obviously, I had to read that as well.

• 6:10Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah, that's great.

• 6:14Karen Kilgariff?

  Uh, okay, well, we'll just do a quick pivot over to this subject line, which is "Children of the Corn: A Nebraskan Child Labor Story."

• 6:22Georgia Hardstark?

  Okay. Okay, L-A-H.

• 6:26Karen Kilgariff?

  It's...

• 6:26Georgia Hardstark?

  Oh, no. You said Nebraska.

• 6:30Karen Kilgariff?

  Oh, it could have been so perfect. Could have been so perfect. "Hi, Karen in Georgia. While most 7th graders were gearing up for summer pool days, my friends and I were applying for summer jobs as de-tasslers. For people outside of Nebraska and Iowa, de-tasseling is the process of pulling the pollen-producing top off of a corn plant to prevent self-pollination."

• 6:51Georgia Hardstark?

  Wow.

• 6:52Karen Kilgariff?

  "Giant machines do the first pass, and then crews of teenagers walk the rows of seed corn to pull whatever was missed."

• 6:59Georgia Hardstark?

  Those tiny, little, young hands. Wow.

• 7:02Karen Kilgariff?

  "In the Midwest, this is basically a rite of passage."

• 7:05Georgia Hardstark?

  Wow.

• 7:06Karen Kilgariff?

  "Every July, thousands of teenagers spend about three weeks working in the cornfields." But I love this information.

• 7:14Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 7:15Karen Kilgariff?

  "A typical day looked like this. I woke up at 4:30 a.m. and put on my uniform, a hat, mosquito net, safety goggles, long sleeves, long pants, tall socks, galoshes,

• 7:25Georgia Hardstark?

  Jesus.

• 7:26Karen Kilgariff?

  and gardening gloves. You do not want exposed skin unless you wanted corn rash."

• 7:32Georgia Hardstark?

  Corn rash is a thing that I've never heard of. Wow.

• 7:37Karen Kilgariff?

  "At 5 a.m., I boarded a yellow school bus with a bunch of other kids my age and to head to whichever cornfield we'd been assigned to that day. This is just like child labor in a very real way."

• 7:48Georgia Hardstark?

  Totally.

• 7:49Karen Kilgariff?

  "Once we got to the field around 6 a.m., we spent the next 10 to 12 hours walking row by row pulling tassels. It took a trained eye to recognize the tassels, so we lived by the cardinal rule. When in doubt, pull it out. Rain or shine, we were out there. The fields were often wet and muddy, which added to an extra challenge. Sometimes the cornfields were so tall that at 5'2, I had to jump for each and every tassel I pulled."

• 8:15Georgia Hardstark?

  That's a good workout.

• 8:16Karen Kilgariff?

  For 10 to 12 hours.

• 8:17Georgia Hardstark?

  No, fuck you. No. Suburbia is not that bad, now that I think about it.

• 8:22Karen Kilgariff?

  "But we got paid by the acre."

• 8:25Georgia Hardstark?

  By the acre, it's so big. Yeah.

• 8:27Karen Kilgariff?

  "So the goal was to be as efficient as possible. No excuses, eyes on the prize."

• 8:31Georgia Hardstark?

  Yep. This is, this is farm life, for sure.

• 8:34Karen Kilgariff?

  "Of course, since we were teenagers with minimal supervision, there was also plenty of tomfoolery. The most memorable was corn bowling, where someone would sneak into your row and shove you over just to see how many cornstalks your body could take out on the way down." I fucking love corn bowling so much.

• 8:51Georgia Hardstark?

  Corn bowling, oh.

• 8:52Karen Kilgariff?

  It's the best. "Despite the bugs, mud, and intense heat, I actually loved it. All my friends were there, and since we didn't have smartphones yet, we were forced to interact and invent ways to entertain ourselves." That's right.

• 9:05Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 9:06Karen Kilgariff?

  The amount of teens that fell in love in the cornstalks pulling out tassels? De-tasseling?

• 9:13Georgia Hardstark?

  Fell in love or did it?

• 9:16Georgia Hardstark?

  Don't fall in love, you're too young.

• 9:17Karen Kilgariff?

  No, no, like, sorry, let's keep it on the crush level. You don't want to be like, weirdly...

• 9:22Georgia Hardstark?

  Staying back in your hometown for your corn crush? No.

• 9:27Karen Kilgariff?

  What if your crush is corn? Then what do you do? "Anywho, all caps. I love the show and I listen while getting ready for work every morning. I'm now a middle school teacher, and MFM has inspired me to sneak little safety lessons into my classroom. We talk about appropriate boundaries between kids and adults." I mean, the idea that it took this long.

• 9:47Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 9:48Karen Kilgariff?

  It's so fucking nuts. "The difference between secrets and surprises, and all kinds of other random things. Hopefully, I'm planting seeds that help kids trust their instincts when something feels off." Fuck, yes.

• 10:00Georgia Hardstark?

  I love it.

• 10:01Karen Kilgariff?

  "Stay sexy and make your team work a grueling summer job to build character and teach them the value of the dollar."

• 10:08Georgia Hardstark?

  Oh, my God.

• 10:09Karen Kilgariff?

  Cassidy. And here's Cassidy. When Cassidy was 14 years old.

• 10:14Georgia Hardstark?

  That outfit.

• 10:15Karen Kilgariff?

  Getting ready, those galoshes.

• 10:18Georgia Hardstark?

  You're gonna get sunburn or tics. You gotta look out for everything.

• 10:21Karen Kilgariff?

  Yes.

• 10:22Georgia Hardstark?

  That's amazing.

• 10:23Karen Kilgariff?

  I know, it's so good.

• 10:24Georgia Hardstark?

  Look at that.

• 10:25Karen Kilgariff?

  I really want to know the dangers that, why the sleeves had to be so long, because if you've walked in corn,

• 10:29Georgia Hardstark?

  which I haven't.

• 10:30Karen Kilgariff?

  It's not that intense.

• 10:32Georgia Hardstark?

  Scratchy or anything?

• 10:33Karen Kilgariff?

  I mean, I'm not the one to say, especially to a person that lives in Nebraska or Iowa.

• 10:39Georgia Hardstark?

  That's a great outfit. I want to be that for Halloween. Who are you for Halloween?

• 10:44Karen Kilgariff?

  De-tassler.

• 10:44Georgia Hardstark?

  Well, I'm a de-tassler.

• 10:46Karen Kilgariff?

  Cassidy to the de-tassler.

• 10:47Georgia Hardstark?

  Teenage de-tassler.

• 10:48Karen Kilgariff?

  Oh, sorry, it says, "This is a picture of me excitedly showing off my de-tasseling outfit at age 14. The photo was taken on a razor-flip phone and immediately posted to Facebook."

• 10:58Georgia Hardstark?

  Yes! Great one.

• 11:01Karen Kilgariff?

  Nice.

• 11:06Speaker 01

  Please help us. They're everywhere. We think they're murder warrants. 911 Nashville returns.

• 11:13Speaker 02

  There's a homicide detective down here.

• 11:15Speaker 03

  Three bodies on the ground.

• 11:17Speaker 01

  With emergencies of biblical proportions.

• 11:19Speaker 03

  I will send swarms upon you and upon your people.

• 11:22Speaker 02

  That's one of the plagues of the Bible.

• 11:23Speaker 03

  And somebody's unleashing them on Nashville.

• 11:26Speaker 01

  Brian Phillippe joins 911 Nashville. All new Thursdays on ABC, next day on Hulu.

• 11:33Speaker 00

  Whether you're buying, renting, or selling, Zillow can help make your someday today. To help find a home that fits where you are in life, or that apartment that's a little closer to where you want to be. Zillow has the right information, tools, and support to help turn your future home into a reality. Because someday starts today. Visit zillow.com/today to get started.

• 11:59Georgia Hardstark?

  Okay, this is St. Patty's Day, of the St. Patty's Day story. Hi, all. It's been a minute since we've heard any things in wall stories, so it's time I shared mine. Five years ago, I bought my very first house, a small, old farmhouse that needed a lot of work. Renovation started, and one winter night, I was talking to my mom on the phone. I noticed something gray sticking out of the brick fireplace on the wall. I assumed it was drywall paper or something, since we'd just barely removed the old wood paneling in that area. A few moments later, I noticed this gray thing had actually moved. I paused the conversation so I could focus, squinted real hard, and said, "Mom, I gotta go. There's a snake in the fireplace." Luckily, it was just a harmless baby garter snake.

• 12:42Georgia Hardstark?

  One fishing pole, a shoelace, a cardboard box, and an hour later, the snake had been relocated to the backyard.

• 12:49Karen Kilgariff?

  Sorry, let me just think about it for a second.

• 12:51Georgia Hardstark?

  Because you can't just spray it with fucking ant spray.

• 12:54Karen Kilgariff?

  No.

• 12:56Georgia Hardstark?

  Like, we found fucking black widows in our backyard recently, and Vince just emptied a whole bottle of... But you can't do that with a snake in your house.

• 13:03Karen Kilgariff?

  No, first of all, then the snake's angry at you.

• 13:06Georgia Hardstark?

  Right.

• 13:07Karen Kilgariff?

  And also, this is a baby garter snake. So there's, I think I would feel comfortable picking up a...

• 13:11Georgia Hardstark?

  I'd call someone.

• 13:12Karen Kilgariff?

  And just throwing it. Or like, because they're good for outdoors. They're gonna eat rodents, they're gonna help you in all other ways.

• 13:20Georgia Hardstark?

  But I have no experience with snakes. What's like, suburbia also didn't have snakes. So like, you probably met some snakes back in your life.

• 13:26Karen Kilgariff?

  Met a snake your time or two.

• 13:29Georgia Hardstark?

  Married him.

• 13:32Karen Kilgariff?

  My first husband. But, just don't kill things.

• 13:35Georgia Hardstark?

  No, I wouldn't. I would never kill it. I would just make someone else do it. A month later, on St. Patrick's Day, chatting with my mom on the phone again, I looked up at the fireplace, and there it was, a snake poking its head out of the wall. Want to see a picture of it?

• 13:47Karen Kilgariff?

  Yes. Oh, no.

• 13:50Georgia Hardstark?

  I mean, it's beautiful. That doesn't look like a harmless snake. Like, a pattern like that is... And the yellow is not what I would think of as a... Like, I don't know what a fucking harmless snake looks like, but that doesn't look like it.

• 14:01Karen Kilgariff?

  No, and it's not gray. They said gray.

• 14:04Georgia Hardstark?

  It's yellow and gray. So, you can imagine how concerned my mom was becoming with my new, big financial investment. The snake was caught, relocated much further away this time, and the house was snake-free for the rest of the year.

• 14:15Karen Kilgariff?

  I also don't understand how they were using a fishing pole, a shoelace, like, that list of things in a shoebox or whatever.

• 14:21Georgia Hardstark?

  Totally.

• 14:22Karen Kilgariff?

  So that was kind of like...

• 14:23Georgia Hardstark?

  Maybe a hoop around the fishing pole, and then you fish it, you get it, tighten the shoelace, put it in the box.

• 14:31Karen Kilgariff?

  Okay.

• 14:31Georgia Hardstark?

  I would do that.

• 14:32Karen Kilgariff?

  That makes sense.

• 14:33Georgia Hardstark?

  I wouldn't touch it, but a fishing pole, I would think I would deal with.

• 14:36Karen Kilgariff?

  That almost sounds like a game at the fair.

• 14:38Georgia Hardstark?

  Fuck, yeah.

• 14:39Karen Kilgariff?

  And then you could win a huge stuffed animal.

• 14:40Georgia Hardstark?

  I mean, Pete, I would get mad, but, okay. Snake-free for this year. But, the next year, on St. Patrick's Day, sitting in my newly renovated living room and enjoying the warm fireplace, I looked up to see a snake again. It made multiple visits and proved impossible to catch this time. They were getting smarter. It's not one guy. I'm sorry.

• 15:00Karen Kilgariff?

  It's a fucking nest of snakes.

• 15:02Georgia Hardstark?

  If you've seen three now. And then it said, "So we started caulking every entry point I could possibly find, and eventually, the snakes stopped coming back for the rest of the year. But sure enough, the next year, and every year since, a snake has found its way into my house on St. Patrick's Day."

• 15:17Karen Kilgariff?

  That's crazy.

• 15:18Georgia Hardstark?

  Then it says, "They might make a visit on other days of the year, too, but like clockwork, there are snakes coming out of some wall in my house on St. Patrick's Day." And then it says, "Karen, as a good Irish Catholic woman, understands the irony of the situation."

• 15:31Karen Kilgariff?

  St. Patrick is the saint... He's a saint because he drove the snakes out of Ireland.

• 15:35Georgia Hardstark?

  Holy shit.

• 15:36Karen Kilgariff?

  So that's, it makes me go, "What? Prove it. Every year?"

• 15:41Georgia Hardstark?

  I believe it.

• 15:42Karen Kilgariff?

  So the ghost of St. Patrick is caught in her chimney?

• 15:45Georgia Hardstark?

  No, she just has a house with a fucking snake nest.

• 15:49Karen Kilgariff?

  She just has 50,000 snakes under her house.

• 15:52Georgia Hardstark?

  And she's paying more attention that day, because it's happened once or twice. And so, it happens every fucking day.

• 15:57Karen Kilgariff?

  They're doing it constantly.

• 15:59Georgia Hardstark?

  It says, "I keep plugging every entry point I find, but a few years back, while in the crawl space doing some plumbing work, piles of snake skins were discovered." Leading us to believe there is, in fact, a den beneath the house. The Nick Terry Den of Snake episode. Go to YouTube and find it immediately. It's fucking hilarious. "So every spring, when the babies start hatching, they make their way out and into the walls of my house. Yay for country living." I believe I found...

• 16:27Karen Kilgariff?

  You don't have to live like that just because you're in the country.

• 16:30Georgia Hardstark?

  "I believe I found all of the entry points for now, but we'll see if St. Patrick will do me dirty again this year. Stay sexy and pray to St. Patrick Jesse." And then it says, "In case you want to see..." Does someone see the video?

• 16:43Karen Kilgariff?

  Yes.

• 16:43Georgia Hardstark?

  Okay, here we go.

• 16:49Georgia Hardstark?

  I mean, I'd burn my fucking house down. We've had multiple, like...

• 16:54Karen Kilgariff?

  Excuse me? Do you have any butter?

• 16:57Georgia Hardstark?

  Happy St. Patrick. You're not wearing green, and it comes and bites her.

• 17:00Karen Kilgariff?

  Pinch.

• 17:02Georgia Hardstark?

  He's cute. He's kind of cute.

• 17:05Karen Kilgariff?

  Also, that's not caulking holes. We need entire bricks.

• 17:09Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah, that was an entire brick.

• 17:11Karen Kilgariff?

  Brick it, and then a piece of metal.

• 17:15Georgia Hardstark?

  Okay, wow, that was amazing.

• 17:17Karen Kilgariff?

  Also, who put that music on?

• 17:19Georgia Hardstark?

  One of the girls did.

• 17:21Karen Kilgariff?

  Was it you guys?

• 17:22Georgia Hardstark?

  The listener sent it in with music, and we weren't sure if it was cleared. So I think Clark picked that for dramatic effect. I love it. It's like robbing a bank of music.

• 17:33Karen Kilgariff?

  Sneaky little snake.

• 17:34Georgia Hardstark?

  Okay.

• 17:36Karen Kilgariff?

  The subject line of this email is "A Dog Story", and then in parentheses, it says "Happy Ending", just so everybody knows. Because these days, we need to know that.

• 17:43Georgia Hardstark?

  Truly.

• 17:45Karen Kilgariff?

  It just starts, "I've been thinking about writing in with this story for literally years, so I won't keep you waiting a moment longer. Thank you." "Almost 20 years ago..." And then in parentheses, it says, "Jesus Christ, that math makes me want to cry." That's it. That happened, me and Nick Schwartz and went to lunch the other day, and then we were like, "We have to figure out how many years it's been since we've seen each other." And it was literally like 16 or something.

• 18:10Georgia Hardstark?

  That's impossible.

• 18:11Karen Kilgariff?

  Insane. "Okay, my husband and I were living in Texas, about 40 minutes northeast of Austin, when our next-door neighbor's dog, a beagle-heeler mix named Junior, started escaping his yard and showing up on our front porch. We would take the dog back to his house, work with the neighbors to fix the fence, etc., but it just kept happening, and the owners did not seem to give a shit. We finally just stopped bringing him back, and again, they did not give a shit."

• 18:35Georgia Hardstark?

  Nice.

• 18:35Karen Kilgariff?

  "Unfortunately, it was quickly apparent that our dogs wanted nothing to do with this poor boy, who was not properly socialized. So I started working on finding him a new, happy home. I was thrilled when a colleague and his wife said that they would take Junior and that they understood the commitment they would need to make to work with his adorably destructive behaviors. Big win." "Fast forward about five years, and we had moved to upstate New York when my old coworker called me out of the blue. Well, he said, "I wanted to tell you what happened with Junior." My heart started to sink. He confirmed that the pup was no longer living with him and his wife, and wanted to tell me the story that I was certain I didn't want to hear. There was a fa... Happy ending. "There was a family living in their neighborhood that they spent a lot of time with,

• 19:21Karen Kilgariff?

  frequently heading to the other family's cabin in the hill country for weekends of fishing, grilling, and hanging out. On one such weekend, they brought Junior along for the trip. He zeroed in on the other family's five-year-old son, who was autistic and non-verbal. We'll call him Tim. Tim would run around the yard. Junior was constantly nipping at him and grabbing at his shorts, pulling him around. When the families were enjoying a bonfire and smores, the dog repeatedly knocked him down, sometimes holding him in one place by lying on his legs. Late in the night, Junior stood at the front door, barking frantically until the entire house was awake. My heart continued to sink. I could just picture this crazy pup running riot over what was supposed to be a fun family weekend in the country,

• 20:05Karen Kilgariff?

  and the stress that it must have caused everyone. But as he wrapped up the story about this fateful weekend away, where Junior harassed the crap out of this poor family and their little boy, he closed with, "So they asked if they could have Junior, and we said yes." Plot twist. The family recognized that Junior's pulling on Tim's shorts was his way of trying to keep the boy away from the street. And knocking Tim down and lying on his legs was keeping him from getting too close to the fire. The incessant barking in the middle of the night, there was a rattlesnake behind the couch."

• 20:39Georgia Hardstark?

  What?

• 20:42Karen Kilgariff?

  So Junior, the dog who had been fed by his previous owners just throwing handfuls of dry food into the backyard, who was never allowed in the house or provided with love and affection, was now going to school to become a support dog. Did we get you?

• 20:58Georgia Hardstark?

  I think so.

• 20:59Karen Kilgariff?

  Yes. Can we zoom in on Georgia's eight tear ducts, please? Because it's actually finally happening. It only took 501 of these fucking episodes to get you and we got you. When Tim started at elementary school, the next year, Junior went with him. I literally couldn't believe my ears. It was all so beautiful and so unexpected. Even now, close to 20 years later, I still see saving this dog from that gross backyard and being a link in the chain that brought him to Tim was as one of the best things I've ever had the privilege to be a part of. Stay sexy and endeavor. Oh, now it got me too. Stay sexy and endeavor to deserve dogs. Rebecca. Perfection, Rebecca.

• 21:43Georgia Hardstark?

  That's even better than be the person your dog thinks you are.

• 21:46Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah. So good.

• 21:49Georgia Hardstark?

  That was so beautiful.

• 21:50Karen Kilgariff?

  That's like a dog that's found his calling.

• 21:53Georgia Hardstark?

  Purpose.

• 21:53Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah, a real purpose.

• 21:54Georgia Hardstark?

  Oh, my God. Oh, like, here's another one, the dog, having a purpose.

• 21:59Karen Kilgariff?

  Yes.

• 22:02Speaker 07

  911, what's your emergency?

• 22:06Speaker 07

  We need help, but they're everywhere. We think they're murder hornets.

• 22:10Speaker 01

  911 Nashville returns.

• 22:13Speaker 02

  It's a homicide detective down here.

• 22:14Speaker 03

  Three bodies on the ground.

• 22:16Speaker 01

  With emergencies of biblical proportions.

• 22:18Speaker 03

  All sins swarms upon you and upon your people.

• 22:21Speaker 02

  That's one of the plagues of the Bible.

• 22:22Speaker 03

  And somebody's unleashing them on Nashville.

• 22:25Speaker 01

  Brian Phillippe, 911 Nashville. All new Thursdays on ABC, next day on Hulu.

• 22:32Speaker 00

  Whether you're buying, renting, or selling, Zillow can help make your someday today to help find a home that fits where you are in life or that apartment that's a little closer to where you want to be. Zillow has the right information, tools, and support to help turn your future home into a reality. Because someday starts today. Visit zillow.com/today to get started.

• 22:59Georgia Hardstark?

  Hi, all. Love the show. I moved to LA two and a half years ago and loved listening to your LA pre-show talk to hype me up for the move. I digress, back to the point of this email. Speaking of LA things, I've seen many celebrities and influencers in my short time as an Angelino, but one sticks out to me as an all-time favorite interaction because it happened twice. I lived near a very popular hiking spot for two years. Has to be Runyon Canyon.

• 23:24Karen Kilgariff?

  Probably.

• 23:25Georgia Hardstark?

  Right? And I would walk my dog on the same two roots. Routes? Every morning in that area. Routes.

• 23:32Karen Kilgariff?

  I think routes.

• 23:33Georgia Hardstark?

  I think routes. Mostly uneventful, except for one fearful morning when my dog ran straight up to this very attractive, fine wine aged man with a thick beard and slightly peppered, slightly wavy hair and beautiful blue eyes getting out of the passenger side of a car. The dog ran up. I was stunned because I had truly just rolled out of bed, straight out of a rom-com, I swear. He politely laughed and petted her. I apologized. We smiled at each other and I continued my walk when it hit me. I know those beautiful blue eyes. Then I thought, surely not. I had to throw away my dog's waist bag up the sidewalk a bit, which meant I had to double back to go back to my building when we passed each other again. We made eye contact for a second time when I saw a different look in his eyes,

• 24:17Georgia Hardstark?

  this time a little more anxious. Do you recognize me? Are you going to say anything? Freak out? What's about to happen? I again politely smiled because I knew that he knew that I knew who he was, that he was clearly trying to enjoy his morning. So I just smiled and kept on. All caps. It was Gerard Butler.

• 24:37Georgia Hardstark?

  Who, listen, I didn't not have to Google. I'm not going to lie.

• 24:40Karen Kilgariff?

  Well, but you know who he is.

• 24:42Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah, as soon as I saw him.

• 24:43Karen Kilgariff?

  That name does not suit him.

• 24:45Georgia Hardstark?

  No.

• 24:46Karen Kilgariff?

  He's a Jerry Butler, but Gerard always throws me.

• 24:49Georgia Hardstark?

  Gerard is a sexy name. You don't think so?

• 24:52Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah, but it doesn't, he's, although a very sexy man, he's also like, hey, guys. Like, he's Mr. Regular.

• 24:59Georgia Hardstark?

  He's Scottish, I guess. It doesn't fit that character, but good God, he's gorgeous. He's from 300. What else?

• 25:06Karen Kilgariff?

  Well, every movie I watched in COVID. Greenland, fucking, my wife is trapped somewhere and I'm going to punch my way to her. Like, that's every movie of his.

• 25:17Georgia Hardstark?

  Okay. Barely recognizable under the beard and long hair, but it was most definitely 2000's rom-com and 2010's period war drama heartthrob Gerard Butler. I was starstruck, but somehow still functional, so much so that I never expected to run into him again on our same route a couple of weeks later. This time, both he and the man he was with appeared to remember my dog's sweet face and looked happy to see her again. Then it says, good girl.

• 25:45Georgia Hardstark?

  They both said, good morning. And the Irish accent proved my suspicions correct. So he's Irish.

• 25:50Karen Kilgariff?

  He's not. He's Scottish.

• 25:51Georgia Hardstark?

  Okay. Although I told the story to friends on my blog and said he introduces himself as Jerry. Smiley face.

• 25:57Karen Kilgariff?

  Thank you.

• 25:58Georgia Hardstark?

  That's amazing. Either way, I'm glad my interactions with him were positive. Stay sexy and get a dog who introduces you to your celebrity crush, Steph, she/her. Gerard, if you, we want to hear the story from your point of view about this girl stalking you on Runyon Canyon.

• 26:14Karen Kilgariff?

  You've got to have your say.

• 26:16Georgia Hardstark?

  Despite your fake beard.

• 26:17Karen Kilgariff?

  I mean, because that's the kind of thing that, like, for somebody like that, he sees somebody once, then they see her, and then it's just like, do I call security now? Or do I have to wait for a third time?

• 26:27Georgia Hardstark?

  But if you're an actor and you're going to Runyon Canyon, it's because, kind of because you want to be seen.

• 26:31Karen Kilgariff?

  You're asking for it and you want it, Jerry.

• 26:34Georgia Hardstark?

  Jerry, let us know. We don't know.

• 26:36Karen Kilgariff?

  Jerry, you have to have a say. Jacob Tierney and I, the all through COVID, that's what we would do is if a new Gerard Butler movie came out, then we'd be like, whoa, we got it. It's like, and we would act like we had to see it on the day it premiered. So like, I've seen every questionable choice that man has made for like, the last, I guess, six years or so.

• 27:00Georgia Hardstark?

  Do you want to, you want to hear Karen's opinion about it, Jerry? She'll give you some feedback about your career.

• 27:04Karen Kilgariff?

  Jerry, I went to acting for, acting school for a year and a half.

• 27:09Georgia Hardstark?

  That's right. I've done Level One of Improv twice.

• 27:12Karen Kilgariff?

  We have feedback.

• 27:13Georgia Hardstark?

  What more could you want?

• 27:16Karen Kilgariff?

  Here's the thing. I get a feeling about Gerard Butler that's very similar to Russell Crowe. Which is, you want to go to a bar in the daytime with these people.

• 27:24Georgia Hardstark?

  Right. Well, especially when they're not, when they're Irish or Scottish or anything, English, whatever.

• 27:30Karen Kilgariff?

  Gaelic, Australian.

• 27:32Georgia Hardstark?

  Sure.

• 27:32Karen Kilgariff?

  Get in there.

• 27:33Georgia Hardstark?

  Totally.

• 27:33Karen Kilgariff?

  Because there is a certain, they're just not the typical Hollywood actor type.

• 27:38Georgia Hardstark?

  Totally.

• 27:39Karen Kilgariff?

  They're kind of like, hey, look, I'm way more good-looking than most of the people on my island, so I get to be here. But other than that, this is crazy. That's the vibe I got.

• 27:47Georgia Hardstark?

  Are we done? Is that it? Do you have one more?

• 27:49Karen Kilgariff?

  Here's my last one. The subject line is, Stories About Your Landline. Greetings, pals and gals. Greetings, gals and pals. Same diff. You asked for stories about our landline phones. And then in quotes, it says, you know, the one that used to hang in your kitchen before smartphones? I guess that's what he said. I grew up in a house of yellers. Our house wasn't particularly large, but with a basement and three bedrooms, my parents often found reasons to scream across the house to each other, to us kids, to our cat, you name it. One day, my dad, and then a parentheses, it says Kurt.

• 28:24Georgia Hardstark?

  Kurt?

• 28:25Karen Kilgariff?

  Kurt. Came home with a marvelous new contraption, a set of rechargeable cordless phones for all the major rooms of our house. Kids' rooms were sadly not included in that list. The most exciting feature, he proclaimed, was an intercom function that turned each phone into a not-quite walkie-talkie.

• 28:44Georgia Hardstark?

  That's smart.

• 28:45Karen Kilgariff?

  Do you remember those? And the cordless phones?

• 28:47Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah. They were like gray and bulky.

• 28:49Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah.

• 28:50Georgia Hardstark?

  And you'd have to pull the cord up.

• 28:52Karen Kilgariff?

  That's right.

• 28:52Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 28:53Karen Kilgariff?

  If you hit the button for the intercom and then dialed the single-digit number of whichever other phone in the house you were trying to reach, the other phone would bleed out a special ringtone that indicated someone was trying to page you.

• 29:06Georgia Hardstark?

  Is that more annoying to be paged than to be yelled at and go, what?

• 29:10Karen Kilgariff?

  Yes.

• 29:10Georgia Hardstark?

  Getting paged is annoying too, probably.

• 29:12Karen Kilgariff?

  I think it's all a little bit, but it's like, if you, if they just yell it, first of all, it's what you're used to.

• 29:16Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 29:17Karen Kilgariff?

  And then it's also just like, then you just know what's going on.

• 29:21Georgia Hardstark?

  I don't know. I think Vince and I, the most annoyed we've ever been with each other or ever are with each other is when one of us is trying to yell something to the other one and they can't hear it.

• 29:30Karen Kilgariff?

  And they're, no one's coming closer.

• 29:31Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah, that's like, or like, they're brushing, I can't hear you right now.

• 29:35Karen Kilgariff?

  Yes.

• 29:36Georgia Hardstark?

  And you're going to be mad at me because I can't hear you, but you're the one yelling.

• 29:41Karen Kilgariff?

  In our aunt and uncle's house, our cousins were raised, which my sister and I, the first time we stayed there, we were both like, wow, that's intense. But they weren't allowed to say what? They'd have to say coming.

• 29:51Georgia Hardstark?

  Wow.

• 29:52Karen Kilgariff?

  If someone was like.

• 29:53Georgia Hardstark?

  Did the parents have to fucking do that too?

• 29:55Karen Kilgariff?

  No way.

• 29:55Georgia Hardstark?

  Fuck that shit.

• 29:56Karen Kilgariff?

  Well, that's because the kids were downstairs and the parents were upstairs.

• 29:59Georgia Hardstark?

  Okay.

• 30:01Karen Kilgariff?

  And older and paying for everything. Okay, so anyway.

• 30:06Karen Kilgariff?

  So that way, we didn't have to yell across the house to each other anymore. My dad explained excitedly, dear reader, it did not work. My mom Sue, who has always been a hyper-efficient type A person, frequently had too much in her hands or in front of her to bother grabbing the phone. My brothers and I were tweens and teens and far too lazy to get up to answer the phone. And my poor father was reduced to having to scream across the house to get the person he was trying to talk to to answer the intercom. That's right. The screaming was never going to end. After a few months, the intercom function saw no more action except for when my brothers or I would prank each other with it or show it off to our cousins.

• 30:47Georgia Hardstark?

  Amazing.

• 30:48Karen Kilgariff?

  My parents still have a landline to this day, but have shrunk the number of phones in the house to just two. It's a good thing, though, because some of my bank or credit card accounts that I opened in high school and/or college are still linked to that phone number. I'll only know which ones when my parents finally disconnect it and I'm unable to log in. I'm sure there's no other way to know. Anyway, thanks for all you do at Exactly Right. You're lovely people who light up my life with your content. Keep up the good work. And it's just signed A, they/them.

• 31:21Georgia Hardstark?

  Thanks, A.

• 31:21Karen Kilgariff?

  Thanks, A.

• 31:22Georgia Hardstark?

  Wow. Those were fun.

• 31:24Karen Kilgariff?

  I know.

• 31:25Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah, write us your stories at myfavoritemurder@gmail. We want to hear all of them.

• 31:29Karen Kilgariff?

  Any kind of slice of life that you want to report, whether it's a complaint about your childhood or just fun times.

• 31:36Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 31:37Karen Kilgariff?

  Or this is what made my family different than the rest of the families in the neighborhood.

• 31:41Georgia Hardstark?

  This is the thing we always fought about. The one thing we always fought about.

• 31:44Karen Kilgariff?

  Yes.

• 31:44Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 31:45Karen Kilgariff?

  Yelling, yelling and phones is so relevant for 80s people.

• 31:50Georgia Hardstark?

  Totally.

• 31:50Karen Kilgariff?

  So fun.

• 31:51Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 31:51Karen Kilgariff?

  All right, well, thanks for writing those in. Everybody did a great job.

• 31:56Georgia Hardstark?

  You did.

• 31:56Karen Kilgariff?

  And stay sexy.

• 31:58Georgia Hardstark?

  Coming. And don't get murdered. I had to.

• 32:02Karen Kilgariff?

  Nice one.

• 32:03Georgia Hardstark?

  Goodbye.

• 32:05Speaker 04

  Elvis, do you want a cookie?

• 32:14Karen Kilgariff?

  This has been an Exactly Right Production.

• 32:16Georgia Hardstark?

  Our managing producer is Molly Smith.

• 32:18Karen Kilgariff?

  Our consulting producer is Kate Schellbach.

• 32:20Georgia Hardstark?

  Our creative lead is Allison Agosti.

• 32:22Karen Kilgariff?

  Our associate producer is Tessa Hughes and our editor is Aristotle Acevedo.

• 32:26Georgia Hardstark?

  This episode was mixed by Leona Scolacci.

• 32:28Karen Kilgariff?

  Email your hometowns to [email protected] and follow the show on Instagram at MyFavoriteMurder.

• 32:34Georgia Hardstark?

  Listen to My Favorite Murder on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

• 32:39Karen Kilgariff?

  Or watch new episodes every week on Netflix. Search for My Favorite Murder, add us to your list, and hit the double thumbs up button. Goodbye.

• 32:54Karen Kilgariff?

  Calling all amateur detectives and podcast obsessives.

• 32:57Georgia Hardstark?

  Virgin Voyages' second True Crime Voyage sets sail March 20th, 2027, for a five-night escape to Grand Turk and the Beach Club at Bimini.

• 33:06Karen Kilgariff?

  As part of the On Air at Sea collection, this immersive sailing brings together fan favorite podcasts, including Disgrace Land, Buried Bones, and Wisecrack, for live recordings, behind-the-scenes access, exclusive meet and greets, and crime-themed programming that you won't find anywhere else.

• 33:22Georgia Hardstark?

  All aboard our award-winning, kid-free ships.

• 33:25Karen Kilgariff?

  Head over to virginvoyages.com/truecrime to secure your spot. Goodbye.

• 33:31Speaker 00

  Okay, laundry stinks, literally. I mean, you could just keep buying new underwear. Not that I've ever done that. Or maybe sort your clothes into piles based on how re-wearable or filthy they are. Or just use Arm & Hammer Deep Clean. It's made for real-life stinks and stains. So even if you don't do laundry the quote "right way", Deep Clean will knock it out. I mean, it is from the number-one liquid detergent brand that tackles more loads than any other. Come clean with Arm & Hammer Deep Clean. Number one claim based on total wash loads sold.

• 34:06Georgia Hardstark?

  I'm Lacey Mosley, author, actor, stand-up comedian, creator, and host of Scam Goddess Podcast, the true crime comedy podcast all about robbery, fraud, and those who practice it. Each week I bring on an amazing guest.

• 34:18Speaker 01

  Ooh, I scam them.

• 34:19Georgia Hardstark?

  What?

• 34:20Speaker 01

  I could talk to you for an hour.

• 34:21Georgia Hardstark?

  You're a generational yapper, like me. That's why I had to make yapping a job. And now you can catch full episodes of my show on YouTube. Start listening to Scam Goddess on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.