Giggling about witches, food orders, and tongues

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Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Paige DeSorbo?

  Cozy season is upon us, which is one of my favorites. I love a chill, crisp morning and I love opening the window and like feeling it on my face. I also love when it's raining and you're having a movie marathon. And that's why you also need Bombas to make your comfiest fall staples. Go with all your favorite fall things. So you can make the most out of one of the best seasons of the year. Like the new suede moccasins are perfect for fall with cushy soles, a sheerling lining, and water-resistant suede. For every item you purchase, an essential clothing item is donated to somebody facing housing insecurity. Bombas truly is the best and I've replaced all my socks with Bombas. Head over to Bombas.com/gigglysquad and use code GIGGLYSQUAD for 20% off your first purchase.

• 0:45Paige DeSorbo?

  That's B-O-M-B-A-S dot com slash giggly squad, code giggly squad at checkout.

• 0:51Hannah Berner?

  I was thinking about how women have so many little things we have to do when we're getting home that you have to be aware of.

• 0:57Paige DeSorbo?

  Like so many people have my location.

• 1:00Hannah Berner?

  And you have to share your ETA, you have to check the route, you have to text everyone I'm home.

• 1:03Paige DeSorbo?

  And if your friend like doesn't text you, oh, you got home, you're, you're calling the FBI.

• 1:08Hannah Berner?

  Yep, yep. And we joke about it because it's so normal to us, but you're constantly paying attention. Even when you're exhausted and just want to get home, your brain still has to be on. You're like, is this guy going the right route? Am I in the right place? Who's around me? What's happening?

• 1:22Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, there's truly no clocking out of your safety.

• 1:25Hannah Berner?

  And that's why riding in a Waymo feels different. It's an autonomous ride with an empty driver's seat. So once you get in, you have this private space that's actually just yours.

• 1:33Paige DeSorbo?

  And you know, I love alone time and I truly feel like it's such a luxury in a Waymo.

• 1:38Hannah Berner?

  Especially after being social, like I love everyone, but like.

• 1:41Paige DeSorbo?

  Please, nobody speak to me.

• 1:42Hannah Berner?

  Like, give me 20 minutes. I want music, the right temperature. There's no compromising and you can customize the ride, put on your own music, answer texts you ignored all night, stare out the window. You actually have a minute where you're not thinking about everyone else.

• 1:56Paige DeSorbo?

  And that's the thing, it's not even necessarily about doing something. Sometimes it's just, you want to sit there and not speak.

• 2:03Hannah Berner?

  And put your guard down for a second and feel safe.

• 2:06Paige DeSorbo?

  Which truly women deserve.

• 2:08Hannah Berner?

  We deserve to disassociate safely for 20 minutes.

• 2:10Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, I mean, put that on a T-shirt for real.

• 2:13Hannah Berner?

  And obviously, safety is a huge part of why that feeling matters. Knowing Waymo's safer, there's something refreshing in having that space where you can just be yourself and let Waymo handle the driving.

• 2:23Paige DeSorbo?

  And we spend enough of our lives being on.

• 2:25Hannah Berner?

  Exactly.

• 2:26Paige DeSorbo?

  We don't need to be on in the car.

• 2:28Hannah Berner?

  Getting around shouldn't require so much mental energy. And if this sounds like your ideal way to get around too, download the Waymo app and use code GIGLY to get 20% off your next two rides. You can check out the full terms in the app.

• 2:41Paige DeSorbo?

  We love a discount.

• 2:42Hannah Berner?

  And if Waymo isn't in your city yet, head to waymo.com/gigly to sign up and help bring Waymo to you. This episode is sponsored by cars.com. I feel like your car says a lot about you. It's transportation, storage, and honestly, kind of a personality test. Maybe you need something for weekend road trips, something you can actually parallel park in the city, or just enough trunk space for an emergency outfit and backup shoes. Personally, I like options and I'm very specific. So this is where cars.com comes in. Cars.com has the tools that make your car shopping way less overwhelming. With more than 200 advanced search filters, you can narrow things down based on what actually matters to you. Deal badges help show how fairly a vehicle is priced, so you can browse with more confidence and fewer chaotic tabs open, which I think we can all appreciate.

• 3:28Hannah Berner?

  Start your search with cars.com. Where to next?

• 3:33Paige DeSorbo?

  Sup, gigglers?

• 3:35Speaker 02

  Scary fictional wifi. Manifest that shit. We can't be managed.

• 3:43Speaker 02

  I mean, the day just got away from me.

• 3:47Hannah Berner?

  What's up, my frozen grapes gigglers? Wasn't that a thing on TikTok?

• 3:50Paige DeSorbo?

  Frozen grapes?

• 3:51Hannah Berner?

  First like sour grapes.

• 3:53Paige DeSorbo?

  It was the...

• 3:54Hannah Berner?

  Frozen sour grape.

• 3:55Paige DeSorbo?

  Grape with the hard shell.

• 3:57Hannah Berner?

  Yeah.

• 3:57Paige DeSorbo?

  Which I actually did make once.

• 3:59Hannah Berner?

  Yeah. And then...

• 4:00Paige DeSorbo?

  And then it all fell apart.

• 4:01Hannah Berner?

  It all fell apart because nothing lasts forever.

• 4:07Hannah Berner?

  We were just catching up about our Halloween plans and turns out we have the exact same Halloween plans this year. Like exactly to a T.

• 4:15Paige DeSorbo?

  Photo shoot tomorrow and then nothing.

• 4:18Hannah Berner?

  I hate Halloween parties, but I realized I don't hate dressing up. I just don't like dressing up and then having like normal conversations with people in your outfit.

• 4:26Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 4:27Hannah Berner?

  I like, don't know how to navigate that.

• 4:33Hannah Berner?

  I just remember like, like Halloween in New York's crazy. Like, I remember waking up when I had two male roommates. And there was like feathers all over the bathroom. And I was like, who like-

• 4:42Paige DeSorbo?

  Fucked a chicken.

• 4:43Hannah Berner?

  Who fucked a chicken? And then Cory, naming names, comes out and he has these khaki pants on still. And there's red all over his crotch. And he was like, so I was grinding on an Elmo last night.

• 4:57Hannah Berner?

  And like, we had, we had fun back in the day, but I was so lazy. I'd always have like a gr- a brown sweatshirt and brown ears and I was a bear.

• 5:06Paige DeSorbo?

  Except for that year you were post Malone, which was so good. That was like the first year we became friends.

• 5:11Hannah Berner?

  Wait, I was post Malone for like three years.

• 5:13Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 5:14Hannah Berner?

  I, it's like when I like a meal and I have to eat it. Like I, that's what I do with Halloween costumes. I do it for like three years.

• 5:19Paige DeSorbo?

  Anything after 2020?

• 5:23Hannah Berner?

  No.

• 5:23Paige DeSorbo?

  No.

• 5:24Hannah Berner?

  What'd you do last year? Oh, you were with me. I did the Australian breakdancer.

• 5:30Paige DeSorbo?

  Oh yeah, I did Fran Drescher.

• 5:32Hannah Berner?

  Fran Drescher, that was really good. Well, this year, we're not gonna give it away. But we both decided we're not gonna go to any parties. We're just gonna take photos of ourselves inside.

• 5:41Paige DeSorbo?

  Halloween is actually my mom's birthday.

• 5:44Hannah Berner?

  A true Scorpio witch.

• 5:45Paige DeSorbo?

  A true witch.

• 5:48Hannah Berner?

  And she makes her witches brew, also known as pasta fagioli.

• 5:52Paige DeSorbo?

  When I was younger, one time my little cousin was mad at my mom for something, who knows what? And all I remember is him yelling at her, saying, that's why you're born on Halloween, cuz you're a witch. And I remember going, oh!

• 6:07Paige DeSorbo?

  Like, it stuck out in my brain. Like, I still know where I was standing at my grandma's house. I was like, oh, he's gonna have to sit on the steps for like 10 minutes.

• 6:15Hannah Berner?

  Well, she's gonna give him the colochio, which you can Google that if you don't know what that is. Um, also, how's your face holding up?

• 6:24Paige DeSorbo?

  Guys, I can't pass by Amir.

• 6:29Paige DeSorbo?

  Being like.

• 6:31Hannah Berner?

  Wait, do you have, like, you're like glowing.

• 6:34Paige DeSorbo?

  Well, I was at a, okay, I just did a photo shoot for a skincare company.

• 6:38Hannah Berner?

  Okay.

• 6:39Paige DeSorbo?

  So they, so I'm really just skin.

• 6:41Hannah Berner?

  They moisturize you.

• 6:42Paige DeSorbo?

  Well, here's the thing. So I get to this photo shoot for the skincare company and they were like, hey, like, some of the shots is gonna be like you washing your face. So we're gonna do like really minimal makeup and we don't retouch because it's skin. And I was like, pardon?

• 7:00Paige DeSorbo?

  Scusi? So everything had to be, like, I could put like a little concealer on in places, but I was, but I couldn't do anything.

• 7:09Hannah Berner?

  I feel like some brands are like super authentic and like obsessed with being authentic. Then some brands will do a whole makeup shoot without, they're like.

• 7:17Paige DeSorbo?

  Fake lashes.

• 7:18Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, or like without the makeup, like they'll use other makeup.

• 7:22Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, and that's capitalism. And we'll just chalk that up to.

• 7:26Hannah Berner?

  Dog eat, dog world.

• 7:27Paige DeSorbo?

  That's showbiz. Okay, let's get into some real stuff because I've been a hat.

• 7:31Hannah Berner?

  Sorry, I was, that was the pregame. I was just dabbling.

• 7:34Paige DeSorbo?

  Get to know us, okay?

• 7:39Paige DeSorbo?

  Did you watch the new season of Nobody Wants Us? Did you watch the old season of Nobody Wants Us?

• 7:45Hannah Berner?

  I did up until like, I watched half of it.

• 7:48Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay. Second season, phenomenal, the acting's amazing.

• 7:52Hannah Berner?

  By the way, huge fan, that's, I'm a huge fan of that show.

• 7:55Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm a massive fan of that show. I can't go on TikTok without now getting clips of like Kristen Bell and Dax Shepard and their whole relationship. And it's, it's consumed all of my thoughts. It's consumed all of my thoughts.

• 8:13Hannah Berner?

  Yeah.

• 8:14Paige DeSorbo?

  Here's the thing about him, who, he has a very successful podcast, he's very like charming, they've been married for a while. People are like going back and finding interview clips of him talking about Kristen.

• 8:26Hannah Berner?

  Yeah.

• 8:28Paige DeSorbo?

  At one point, they were like the couple where it was like, oh, they're like the, they were like a Blake Lively Ryan Reynolds. And that, but no fault of, she's an angel, sweet baby.

• 8:39Hannah Berner?

  She's more than perfect. She's Anna in Frozen. She needs to be protected at all costs. People don't know that.

• 8:45Paige DeSorbo?

  She's the voice of Gossip Girl, but like, she could have, enough. What has he done? I'm not quite sure. He did an interview and he was like, talking about how he's got insecurities of like.

• 8:58Hannah Berner?

  Again, first of all, I'm out. A guy who has insecurities, I'm out.

• 9:02Paige DeSorbo?

  But he's like, I, he was like, I have all these insecurities and he like listed them and they're like all normal ones that everyone has, like the way they look, the way they talk, like whatever. And then he was like, the only time I'm like, I think the word he used was like unbashful, whatever, is in relationships where like he thinks he's the prize. I dated a man one time that like would repeatedly tell me that he was also the prize and that it should be 50/50. And I was like, you're gay. You want a boyfriend. Like, I'm sorry. I literally cannot watch clips of him talking ill of her anymore. And then she, there's clips of her being like how she, obsessed she is with him.

• 9:46Hannah Berner?

  Yeah.

• 9:47Paige DeSorbo?

  If you have a friend who's obsessed with her boyfriend, I need you to pull them aside. It's terrifying.

• 9:53Hannah Berner?

  What it's giving. Remember Simone Biles?

• 9:55Paige DeSorbo?

  Yes.

• 9:56Hannah Berner?

  When her boyfriend was kind of like.

• 9:58Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm a good athlete too.

• 10:00Hannah Berner?

  But he also was like, you know, she sent to my DMs, like I'm the one, whatever. And look, I.

• 10:07Paige DeSorbo?

  No, I can't.

• 10:08Hannah Berner?

  One thing, mm, okay, where's my take?

• 10:10Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 10:11Hannah Berner?

  Okay.

• 10:12Paige DeSorbo?

  I can't get it. Yeah, hit them with it.

• 10:16Hannah Berner?

  Get that. Sometimes I feel like if you just pull people's like public personas of their relationships and you judge it based on that.

• 10:24Paige DeSorbo?

  Totally.

• 10:26Hannah Berner?

  But I would argue that people's public personas, their relationships is better than what it is behind closed doors.

• 10:32Paige DeSorbo?

  Well, of course.

• 10:32Hannah Berner?

  So like, whenever people are like, oh yeah, they're so cute. I'm like, yeah, they're literally actors.

• 10:37Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 10:37Hannah Berner?

  They're actors. Like, when you're on the red carpet, obviously, he could not touch you for three months, but on the red carpet, he's gonna put his arm around your waist. You know what I mean? Um, so, that's one thing. I also, I feel like with the girls, sometimes it's, I don't want a guy to be like, so obsessed with me and I'm like, not as obsessed with him.

• 10:58Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 10:59Hannah Berner?

  Like, cuz I get bored. But I like it going like, back and forth. Like, some weeks, I like being like, oh, I'm the ugly one. Oh, like, or like, he's, like, something about him, I'm like, oh, he's hot this week. And then the next week, I'm like, catch up, you gotta catch up. But, um, it's hard to perceive a relationship based on like, just old clips. I just think like, she's so fucking successful.

• 11:20Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah. That he's gotta be a little insecure.

• 11:23Hannah Berner?

  Sometimes, you can't have two, um, headshots in a relationship.

• 11:27Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 11:29Hannah Berner?

  And I can't in mine, cuz my husband's old.

• 11:32Paige DeSorbo?

  So true.

• 11:32Hannah Berner?

  Like, if Dez was thirty-five and he was like, doing his stuff when he was thirty-five, it would be chaos.

• 11:39Paige DeSorbo?

  No.

• 11:39Hannah Berner?

  Which, what were you gonna say?

• 11:42Paige DeSorbo?

  I was gonna say, people get so mad when, when like, women are like, like, I very much live in the mindset of like, the man should like the girl more. And people get mad at that same, like, no, it should be, you should equally love. The only reason I think the guy should like the girl more is because their, their role is to protect. So like, you, if you're gonna protect me, you have to care about me more.

• 12:07Hannah Berner?

  True.

• 12:08Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm not running in front of a bullet for you, you psycho, but you should run in front of one for me.

• 12:12Hannah Berner?

  True, true.

• 12:14Paige DeSorbo?

  Cuz you're my protector.

• 12:16Hannah Berner?

  And guess what?

• 12:16Paige DeSorbo?

  If you're not, then what are you doing here? I'll hire someone. I'll hire a bodyguard.

• 12:21Hannah Berner?

  In the very beginning, he needs to be the one that's more into it. Cuz men are simple, they have one way of thinking. That's how they'll always be.

• 12:27Paige DeSorbo?

  And I get, like,

• 12:28Hannah Berner?

  And I love talking in mass generalizations.

• 12:30Paige DeSorbo?

  I love being a feminist. I'm all for being a feminist. I'm sorry, but my number one rule that I really won't go against, I'm never reaching out first. I'm never DMing first, I'm never asking you out, I'm never give, going up to you and giving you my number. And I get that like, women can be like, that's empowering. Like, no, you take charge, not me. Not me. Because if you don't want me first, then I don't want you back.

• 12:56Hannah Berner?

  That's valid. I was like, I was, you know I love to flirt. So, and I think men are scared. But again, you don't want, want a man who's so scared. I think men are intimidated. I think men don't know things. So like, I'm fine with putting out the first like, hey, what's up? And then seeing like, if they make it happen. But then I look back, not to be like, okay, but like Dez is the one who DM me.

• 13:19Paige DeSorbo?

  As he should.

• 13:20Hannah Berner?

  And that's romance. A DM is romantic.

• 13:23Paige DeSorbo?

  Romantic.

• 13:24Hannah Berner?

  So, but look, the truth is, is if you feel like you're forcing it at all in the fucking beginning, when you guys are so fucking horny, sorry, mom. Like, it's a no. Which brings me to my feed, which is full of Lily Allen and David Harbour. Who, I've seen David Harbour and his scruffy ass walking around New York City before.

• 13:44Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay, I didn't even know they were a couple, let alone had this crazy breakup. Well, also, I didn't actually know she was a singer.

• 13:52Hannah Berner?

  Sorry.

• 13:52Paige DeSorbo?

  I like missed the MO.

• 13:54Hannah Berner?

  I'll see you cry, and I'll see you cry.

• 13:58Hannah Berner?

  Wait, well, did I hit that note? Is that why you knew it?

• 14:01Paige DeSorbo?

  Did you sing on the Kelly Clarkson Show? Did you?

• 14:05Hannah Berner?

  Look, when I-

• 14:06Paige DeSorbo?

  Did you sing on the Kelly Clarkson Show?

• 14:12Hannah Berner?

  Mom! No.

• 14:14Paige DeSorbo?

  I was like, watching a clip, I go, if she sings in front of Kelly, I'm gonna-

• 14:18Hannah Berner?

  Well, I was a singer and I was like, well, she's a singer, I'm a singer.

• 14:22Paige DeSorbo?

  I knew, I knew that was-

• 14:27Paige DeSorbo?

  I knew that was your mindset going in, like, well, we're both doing our craft.

• 14:32Hannah Berner?

  Okay, so people don't know these talk shows, beforehand, there's a producer who calls you.

• 14:36Paige DeSorbo?

  Right.

• 14:37Hannah Berner?

  And this producer, we were kiki-ing, and we had a lot of stories lined up. And it goes fast, so I didn't know what story might go.

• 14:45Paige DeSorbo?

  Right. And like, they prepare you for 15 minutes of talking, when you're really gonna talk for-

• 14:49Hannah Berner?

  Three.

• 14:49Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 14:50Hannah Berner?

  And I had like, different bits, I had a joke, I was gonna do a monologue, I didn't know. And next thing you know, I was just like, Kelly, I think I could hit the wick and-

• 15:00Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm so happy I wasn't there, because-

• 15:03Hannah Berner?

  I didn't attempt it, though. I didn't, like, I, she like-

• 15:06Paige DeSorbo?

  Oh, you just said, okay.

• 15:07Hannah Berner?

  I was like, I think I could, like, I wasn't gonna disrespect Kelly Clarkson on her own job. No, no, I have respect.

• 15:13Paige DeSorbo?

  I thought you were like, American Idol, cool, it was on 30 years ago.

• 15:17Hannah Berner?

  Imagine I did it, and then there was just silence, Kelly Clarkson was like, get out. She's like, actually quitting the show. She just goes full Simon Cowell. She's incredible.

• 15:28Paige DeSorbo?

  I was on the first episode of The Kardashians.

• 15:30Hannah Berner?

  You know who told me this? Desmond Bishop. Desmond Bishop calls me and goes, Paige is on The Kardashians.

• 15:38Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm minding my own business.

• 15:42Hannah Berner?

  Watching?

• 15:42Paige DeSorbo?

  Minding my own business, it's a mor- I'm having a slow morning. I said, oh, my girls are back. Let me throw the girls up on TV. I'm sitting there, I'm drinking my coffee, and all of a sudden I hear Kourtney say my- I like hear my own stuff. And I'm like, oh my god, no one's talking about this. No one's talking about it.

• 16:03Hannah Berner?

  Well, because they couldn't use your actual voice.

• 16:06Paige DeSorbo?

  Oh, yeah, they- oh, oh.

• 16:08Hannah Berner?

  That's what happened. I guess NBC or Bravo didn't give them... Yep, didn't.

• 16:15Paige DeSorbo?

  Didn't give them the rights to use my voice.

• 16:18Hannah Berner?

  And it's to your voice.

• 16:20Paige DeSorbo?

  Dare they.

• 16:21Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, it's your voice.

• 16:22Paige DeSorbo?

  I own it.

• 16:23Hannah Berner?

  No, but that's like, why I couldn't pu- I couldn't post my crazy paparazzi pic where my hair was all crazy? Cause they weren't- they didn't give me per- like, they didn't give it to me in Getty, and my team was like, they could sue you for 50K. And I was like, well, I do want likes on this photo.

• 16:37Paige DeSorbo?

  You know, I- that one time when they were trying to sue me for like 30,000?

• 16:41Hannah Berner?

  Did you get out of it?

• 16:42Paige DeSorbo?

  Uh, yeah, I ran out the statute of limitations. And that's what can not responding to an email can do.

• 16:50Paige DeSorbo?

  This isn't real.

• 16:51Hannah Berner?

  Yeah. I'm suing you, just got reminded to sue you again.

• 16:57Paige DeSorbo?

  My lawyer was like, honestly, we just have to make it till like June 7. And I was like, cool.

• 17:01Hannah Berner?

  Wait, but the Lily Allen thing.

• 17:03Paige DeSorbo?

  Wait, the Lily Allen thing is crazy.

• 17:05Hannah Berner?

  I haven't listened to any of it. I was gonna listen to it when I leave the studio. Apparently, it's like-

• 17:10Paige DeSorbo?

  I mean, she gives names, she gives dates, she gives social security numbers, like-

• 17:14Hannah Berner?

  She gives like, it starts with like her life when they first move in to like their new apartment that they did in Architectural Digest in New York City.

• 17:21Paige DeSorbo?

  The Pussy Palace.

• 17:22Hannah Berner?

  The Pussy Palace. And then it like, I kind of love an album having a-

• 17:26Paige DeSorbo?

  A full story.

• 17:26Hannah Berner?

  I also love that she- someone was joking that um, she hasn't written anything in seven years, so like, he's gonna be like, wait, she did what? And she's like, there's no way she did a whole album. She hasn't written a song in seven years. But you know what's a sign of being in a bad relationship? Not creating.

• 17:41Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, not doing shit.

• 17:42Hannah Berner?

  Like Mandy Moore. People don't talk about that enough. And Kelly Clarkson. The second they got out of their relationship, by the way, this is a chapter in the Giggles Webbook, which is available on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, etc.

• 17:54Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 17:56Hannah Berner?

  Sorry, my fancy football.

• 17:59Hannah Berner?

  I lost today. Yeah, I lost. You could tell, the vibes are bad. So yeah, when women are not creating and like shining and taking up space, it's normally that they're in a bad relationship. But I would argue Kristen Bell is out here.

• 18:13Paige DeSorbo?

  Shining.

• 18:13Hannah Berner?

  Shining.

• 18:14Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 18:15Hannah Berner?

  But maybe it's because he's busy podcasting.

• 18:17Paige DeSorbo?

  I think that's what it is.

• 18:18Hannah Berner?

  And he has his thing.

• 18:20Paige DeSorbo?

  He has his thing, but like he just doesn't speak about her the way I think that I want her to be spoken about.

• 18:27Hannah Berner?

  I agree.

• 18:28Paige DeSorbo?

  You know?

• 18:28Hannah Berner?

  Look, it's also because she's so angelic.

• 18:32Paige DeSorbo?

  I also had this thought too, because I think she says it in like one of her interviews or whatever. I feel like in past relationships, I was of the mindset that like, oh, if you end up with this person, you have to make like these crazy compromises. And you have to have like insane sacrifices. And that just means you really love that person because you're going to sacrifice this or you're going to compromise this significant part of your life. And then I realized, that's a load of shit. Like when you're in a real good, healthy relationship, I'm sorry, there's not a single compromise I could fricking find.

• 19:11Paige DeSorbo?

  Like, you're not changing your whole lifestyle as a compromise disguised under like, we'll know we're in love.

• 19:19Hannah Berner?

  No, and like the things that you do compromise are the things that you're like, okay, that's valid.

• 19:23Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, you're like, I don't, I actually don't care about them.

• 19:25Hannah Berner?

  And sometimes the stuff you compromise is stuff that actually helps you grow. Like it actually, he makes you better by being like, hey, can you stop doing this?

• 19:31Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 19:32Hannah Berner?

  Wait, can I say something like the behind the scenes of Kelly Clarkson that people don't know?

• 19:36Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 19:36Hannah Berner?

  Because I know you guys saw me on the show and you were like, she's beautiful. Like she's perfect, like she's glowing, like, did she get Botox? Well, I was on day two of my period. And I was wearing this like really fun high skirt.

• 19:51Paige DeSorbo?

  Wait, was it pony hair?

• 19:54Hannah Berner?

  Um, it was faux pony.

• 19:55Paige DeSorbo?

  I loved it.

• 19:57Hannah Berner?

  There's faux ponies out here. Thank you, it was Theophileo.

• 20:11Hannah Berner?

  Meathermopolis.

• 20:14Hannah Berner?

  So, okay, so then there was a top and, and I had to like tuck it in, but it was kinda like falling out.

• 20:21Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay.

• 20:21Hannah Berner?

  So, um, the stylist that was with me was like, we have to, um, take the top and like pin it to your underwear. And I was wearing like big granny panties. So I was like, okay, perfect.

• 20:32Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah. You're like, I have enough circumference.

• 20:34Hannah Berner?

  But then like I got there and I was like starving. It was like 2pm and I wasn't, and I hadn't eaten yet.

• 20:40Paige DeSorbo?

  All day?

• 20:41Hannah Berner?

  No, I ate in the morning. I had breakfast.

• 20:44Paige DeSorbo?

  I was gonna say that.

• 20:44Hannah Berner?

  I didn't eat lunch yet.

• 20:46Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm like, you hadn't eaten and it was 2 o'clock?

• 20:49Hannah Berner?

  So like normally around 1 I like eat lunch. If I, it was like 2 o'clock and you know when you're like, okay, let's not eat. But then I was getting like ravaged. Like when I'm hungry, it's not like a light hun- it's like I'm like, the room starts spinning. I'm like, I start frothing at the mouth.

• 21:02Paige DeSorbo?

  It's so interesting, cause when I have to do something, the thought of food makes me physically ill. Cause I'm like, no, let me get this done and then I'll do it.

• 21:09Hannah Berner?

  I was starving like I'd run a marathon. So I got there and they had veggie straws and I was like, perfect, that's healthy. And then I had a, like a Nutri Grain bar, great. And then I think I like had some chips or something. I don't know, but I'm.

• 21:21Paige DeSorbo?

  So you had a full lunch?

• 21:22Hannah Berner?

  I'm shoving my face.

• 21:23Paige DeSorbo?

  And then I had a turkey sandwich and then they had a pasta salad and I'm so hungry.

• 21:28Hannah Berner?

  The head of a pig. But then I, I'm, okay, day two of my period, like Chris, this is important for you to learn about. I'm just like, have diarrhea. Like, like my cramps are like diarrhea. So like, I'm like eating, thinking that I'm like free and like nothing bad can happen ever in my life. And she's tying my shirt to my panties. And I realized, oh my god.

• 21:50Paige DeSorbo?

  That's the first time I've ever heard you say panties and I'm.

• 21:53Hannah Berner?

  That's gross.

• 21:54Paige DeSorbo?

  That was so disgusting.

• 21:58Paige DeSorbo?

  Why stop it?

• 22:00Hannah Berner?

  Sorry, my granny panties.

• 22:04Paige DeSorbo?

  Kids listen to this in the backseat of the car.

• 22:06Hannah Berner?

  That's where you cross the line. So, um, I was like, oh, I have to go to the bathroom.

• 22:14Hannah Berner?

  So it was like, it was clipped off.

• 22:17Paige DeSorbo?

  I love when you like act dainty or like little girl, like a little girl.

• 22:21Hannah Berner?

  I have to go to the restroom. So I say, I want a restroom. So I go, actually, if I say I have to pee, I have to pee. If I say I have to go to the restroom, you know it's a problem. Um, by the way, Seth Cohen, um, Adam Brody is like staring at me. Like he was right across the green room.

• 22:38Hannah Berner?

  And I swiftly go to the green room, which by the way is like in, the bathroom is like open where like everyone who works in 30 Rock goes.

• 22:44Paige DeSorbo?

  No.

• 22:45Hannah Berner?

  So like I didn't have, he's quiet, but I didn't want to like undo, so I just pulled the back down. So it was still clipped in the front.

• 22:54Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay, okay.

• 22:55Hannah Berner?

  Like kind of like this, um, sun, the suntan lotion thing.

• 22:59Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 23:00Hannah Berner?

  So like shit myself, come back, go back. And then I'm back in the green room and I feel it coming on again. And like I have to go on in like 20 minutes and I'm having like a full diarrhea.

• 23:12Paige DeSorbo?

  Oh my god.

• 23:13Hannah Berner?

  There's like eight people in my green room.

• 23:14Paige DeSorbo?

  Were you nervous?

• 23:15Hannah Berner?

  Not telling anyone. No, I just, my body like, I think I had adrenaline.

• 23:19Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 23:20Hannah Berner?

  And then I ate like all these random things and I was on day two of my period and my body was like, we're not doing this right now.

• 23:27Paige DeSorbo?

  Adrenaline will really make you shit yourself.

• 23:29Hannah Berner?

  So I'm like, so I go back and I'm like fighting with this like underwear thing and I'm pretending to these people that I'm just like checking my hair in the bathroom. But I'm like having like explosive diarrhea.

• 23:40Paige DeSorbo?

  Are you sweating at this point?

• 23:41Hannah Berner?

  I'm sweating in my zebra hair.

• 23:44Paige DeSorbo?

  You're faux pony.

• 23:46Hannah Berner?

  And then like, by the way, this is a, it's not live, but it's, it's fucking tight. Like they're like, okay, we're gonna need you in four minutes.

• 23:52Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 23:53Hannah Berner?

  And I'm like, okay, do we try one more just to make sure I don't shit myself on the Kelly show? So like run one more time and then no one knew, I'm just, this is where I'm telling it. And then I walked on, like I didn't just like, my asshole wasn't bleeding. And the way we started the show was they were like, I want you to host a little, um, game first. So I'd never met Kelly Clarkson.

• 24:12Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 24:12Hannah Berner?

  They just announced my name, I walk on and I'm hosting this game show with Kelly and Adam Brody and some other people from Nobody Wants This. And I was just like, hi Kelly Clarkson, trying to read a teleprompter while holding my butthole as.

• 24:27Hannah Berner?

  And then I was like, I might have to hit the wicked note later. That's when I'm gonna lose it. So that's why I mean-

• 24:32Paige DeSorbo?

  Imagine you hit the wicked note, but also shit on her couch. Everyone would be like, Tom Cruise? Who? Because this is the new couch moment.

• 24:41Hannah Berner?

  Look, everyone's trying to go viral these days. Like, you never know.

• 24:44Paige DeSorbo?

  No, adrenaline is so crazy when you have to go to the bathroom. I one time was going through a boyfriend's phone.

• 24:52Paige DeSorbo?

  And I was like, oh my god, I'm gonna shit myself. And I had to run to the bathroom. So then the next time I went through the same boyfriend's phone, I took the phone, first went into the bathroom, sat on the toilet, then I went through-

• 25:03Hannah Berner?

  Let's call the woman instead.

• 25:05Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, because that adrenaline, like, I was like, I'm gonna lose my lunch.

• 25:07Hannah Berner?

  No, you know what? You know when people are like, oh, I'm backed up, I'm backed up? One thing about stand-up comedians, we are never backed up. Because right before you go on stage, you feel a rush. Also, like, I feel like when you're running-

• 25:19Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay, I never used to freaking have that, though, before going out on stage. And then I literally hung out with you too many times. I was in Palm Springs, I had to go and do something with Charlotte Tilbury, like, out on stage and like, talk to her, whatever. And before, I'm like, I'm gonna have a nervous poop, like, I have to go to the bathroom. And every time I would say to people, like, oh, I'm gonna go to the bathroom, someone would be like, oh, I have to go too, I'll come with you. And it's like an open, and I'm like, I don't want you to come with me.

• 25:44Hannah Berner?

  People don't talk about that enough. Look, I love female friendship, when like, you can look at a girl and just be like, I have to poop. Like, that's, there's a beautifulness about it. However-

• 25:53Paige DeSorbo?

  If I'm at a dinner, if I'm at a group dinner, and I'm getting up to go to the bathroom, all are welcome, come to the bathroom, because I'm sure I need products, I'm sure there's like, things we have to talk about. If it's a normal day, don't come to the bathroom with me. If it's a 2pm on a Wednesday, don't follow me into the bathroom.

• 26:11Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, you're-

• 26:12Paige DeSorbo?

  I have things to do.

• 26:13Hannah Berner?

  Because you're gonna be mischievous in there.

• 26:14Paige DeSorbo?

  I wanna be by myself.

• 26:17Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, naughty things are gonna happen. I actually, shout out to Haley, my blonde best friend, Victoria's Secret, I was like, wearing nothing.

• 26:25Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 26:26Hannah Berner?

  And-

• 26:26Paige DeSorbo?

  You looked really good at Victoria's Secret.

• 26:28Hannah Berner?

  We were about to go on the red carpet, and they go, do you wanna run to the restroom first? Because there isn't a restroom where the show is. I've never said no to a restroom, right? Like, you know, some people are like, meh, that's a skill of mine.

• 26:38Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 26:38Hannah Berner?

  I can use it at all times. I can use it right now. So I go, okay-

• 26:42Paige DeSorbo?

  See, that's funny, because I'm someone that's like, oh, okay.

• 26:44Hannah Berner?

  See, I'm like, oh, thank you. I would love-

• 26:46Paige DeSorbo?

  I'll hold it.

• 26:47Hannah Berner?

  No, I don't like holding. Life is too short. Farts any of it. So I'm with Haley and I'm like, yeah, I'm gonna go. And she's like, okay, we're going together. And I'm looking at her, I'm like, babe, this is a pre-red carpet. I'm like, I'm about to.

• 27:01Paige DeSorbo?

  You're not old enough to experience this, Haley. You're too pure.

• 27:04Hannah Berner?

  You're gonna see some things you don't want to see that you'll never be able to forget. But like, that's when you like, try to, you know, make sure that you're just, the tank is empty. Um, but it brings you closer to your friends.

• 27:16Paige DeSorbo?

  It does.

• 27:16Hannah Berner?

  You, the best is when you like fart and you just go, excuse me. Like, like you did something like polite.

• 27:21Paige DeSorbo?

  I don't think I've ever done that. I don't think I've ever farted in front of a friend. Do I not have any real friends?

• 27:30Hannah Berner?

  Have you never farted in front of me?

• 27:31Paige DeSorbo?

  No.

• 27:34Paige DeSorbo?

  I could do it right now. Wait, wanna hear something else disgusting that I saw on TikTok?

• 27:39Hannah Berner?

  Yeah.

• 27:40Paige DeSorbo?

  Your tongue knows what every-

• 27:43Hannah Berner?

  Why'd you say tongue?

• 27:44Paige DeSorbo?

  Cause I really wanted to emphasize it. Your tongue. Yeah, why am I saying that? Knows what everything tastes like or feels like.

• 27:55Hannah Berner?

  Cause it has, it has.

• 27:56Paige DeSorbo?

  Think about licking anything in this room, you know what it would feel like on your tongue.

• 28:03Paige DeSorbo?

  Is that so trippy and weird? Like, I know what the screen of my phone would feel like on my tongue.

• 28:09Hannah Berner?

  Even though we've never licked it.

• 28:11Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, I know what the table would feel like on my tongue.

• 28:15Paige DeSorbo?

  Is that so, like, you know what this would feel like on your tongue?

• 28:19Hannah Berner?

  What algorithm? Did you even?

• 28:21Paige DeSorbo?

  I don't know where I stumbled upon.

• 28:26Hannah Berner?

  So basically saying, you don't have to lick it to know.

• 28:30Paige DeSorbo?

  You don't have to lick it to know what it feel, what it feel like on your tongue. You should say that to your husbands. I don't have to lick it to know. Thank you.

• 28:41Hannah Berner?

  We have a fun little surprise.

• 28:43Paige DeSorbo?

  We do. We filmed an episode of Hannah and Paige Try New Things.

• 28:48Hannah Berner?

  A rogue episode.

• 28:49Paige DeSorbo?

  And-

• 28:50Hannah Berner?

  Cause we missed it. We couldn't be kept away.

• 28:52Paige DeSorbo?

  No, we literally couldn't be stopped.

• 28:54Hannah Berner?

  So much fun.

• 28:55Paige DeSorbo?

  We-

• 28:56Hannah Berner?

  Went to New Jersey.

• 28:57Paige DeSorbo?

  And that's all we're gonna say.

• 28:59Hannah Berner?

  And we went to a Dunkin'.

• 29:01Paige DeSorbo?

  And we just tried new things at Dunkin'. We learned how to make drinks. Hannah drove through the drive thru and I did the computer. It's honestly one of my favorite episodes I think we've ever done because it was-

• 29:14Hannah Berner?

  I was kind of starstruck.

• 29:16Paige DeSorbo?

  At Dunkin'.

• 29:16Hannah Berner?

  Yeah.

• 29:17Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 29:17Hannah Berner?

  Like for Dunkin' to be like, you can go behind the scenes.

• 29:20Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 29:20Hannah Berner?

  We got to like see how everything's made and we had some contests. We tried to-

• 29:26Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 29:26Hannah Berner?

  Make stuff for Grace. We always turned things into-

• 29:30Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, we had to test our limits, you know, yeah.

• 29:32Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, we pushed ourselves. And I had a big car around the drive thru. I almost-

• 29:37Paige DeSorbo?

  Well, you'll see.

• 29:37Hannah Berner?

  You'll see. I don't want to give away what happens, but it was pretty crazy.

• 29:41Paige DeSorbo?

  A new episode of Hannah and Paige Try New Things comes out soon on our YouTube, brought to you by Dunkin'. It's so easy to put together a wish list when you have Missouri coming out with new styles all of the time. Their bestsellers, their Charlotte and Stevie collections are some of my favorites. They really know how to mix metals, stack textures, and contrast all of your jewelry. And making your really good jewelry, your everyday jewelry. Missouri uses only the finest material from 14 karat gold and sterling silver to diamonds and gemstones. And they prioritize sustainable practices and exceptional quality. So you can wear your pieces with confidence, knowing they're made to last. My favorite thing from Missouri is definitely their gold hoops.

• 30:23Paige DeSorbo?

  I have three holes in each ear, so I love having like a mini gold hoop, then a larger gold hoop. And they really are perfect. I've also started wearing a lot more rings. And they're just so easy and stackable and they all look good together. So it's like, they kind of did the stacking for you. They also have accessible price points. There's a reason they're the most loved brand. Shop Missouri jewelry in store, in app, or online at Missouri.com. Can we talk about the difference between a home that's furnished and a home that's intentional? Because if you're still living with a mattress on the floor at 25, that's crazy. And Cozy is here to help. Bed frames, sofas, rugs, shelves, tables. Cozy has everything and it all comes in boxes directly to your door. Cozy Furniture is mom-

• 31:07Paige DeSorbo?

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• 31:52Paige DeSorbo?

  That is why I'm currently obsessed with alleys from Sam Edelman. They're ballet flat, but a little something extra for fall. A contrasting velvet cap toe, I have them in this gorgeous azure blue, which is like a dusty muted blue that somehow goes with everything, even Daphne's eyes. They're so cute and I'm already envisioning my next outfit. Straight leg jeans and oversized blazer and a little shoulder bag. Very, I just threw this on when we all know I absolutely did not. And Hannah is loving hers too. She has the Michaela, which is the Sam Edelman's take on a Mary Jane. And this season it comes in the chicest leopard. So gorge, so easy and exactly the kind of shoe that makes an otherwise basic outfit look like you actually tried. And there's so much more coming from Sam Edelman this fall beyond these two.

• 32:37Paige DeSorbo?

  Like the new Teigan and Tallulah pumps, plus ready to wear handbags, fragrances, and even a new men's collection. So basically you can make sure both you and your man are looking good for date night. Because we're not doing all that getting dressed just to let him show up in a T-shirt. Head to samedelman.com and get 15% off with code giggly15. This episode is sponsored by the new Hershey's creme bars in salted caramel and affogato. Lately, I've been realizing that luxury doesn't have to mean some huge splurge. Sometimes it's just taking a few minutes to yourself during a busy day. I have one of these moments, oh, I don't know, every day around two o'clock. Whether that's making a pick me. Up coffee, or maybe I just need to scroll for a little bit on the couch.

• 33:22Paige DeSorbo?

  That's why I'm actually so excited about the new Hershey's Salted Caramel and Afegato Creme Bars available now. I absolutely love a treat yourself moment in the middle of the day, and this is a classic Hershey's Milk Chocolate, layered with a salted caramel or Afegato Creme filling. So it feels a little elevated while still being your favorite Hershey's chocolate. Pick up the new Hershey's Creme Bars in Salted Caramel or Afegato wherever you shop for snacks and choose happiness with every bite. If your anxiety, depression, or ADHD are more than just a rough patch, you might need more than just talk therapy or self-help tools. Talkiiatry connects you with real psychiatric care so you can actually understand what's going on and get a treatment plan that works.

• 34:05Paige DeSorbo?

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• 34:44Paige DeSorbo?

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• 35:00Hannah Berner?

  I was thinking about Dancing with the Stars, which I'm locked in on. I was like, there was a Wicked night, and you know, I love Wicked.

• 35:07Paige DeSorbo?

  I saw that.

• 35:08Hannah Berner?

  You would have hated it.

• 35:09Paige DeSorbo?

  I know.

• 35:10Hannah Berner?

  Why does it bring me joy when you hate something?

• 35:11Paige DeSorbo?

  I know. I don't watch it, but I already know I'm so proud of Alex Earl. I feel like she's really crushing it.

• 35:19Hannah Berner?

  No, like, she's, she's having performances that afterwards, I'm like, that was the greatest thing I've ever seen. Like, she's...

• 35:24Paige DeSorbo?

  But she has a dancer's body.

• 35:26Hannah Berner?

  And I'm gonna say something about Alex Earl. There's a lot of people that'll be like, she doesn't have talent, she doesn't whatever. People do go viral and get lucky. But she's already been successful for a couple of years now. That's not all luck. She's clearly a very, very, very hard worker. And like, not, and smart, and like, like, it takes a certain kind of person to like, execute Dancing with the Stars. It takes pressure, it takes focus, it takes memorization. Like, I'm very impressed by her.

• 35:56Paige DeSorbo?

  Yes.

• 35:56Hannah Berner?

  She's competing with like, top athletes.

• 35:57Paige DeSorbo?

  And do you want to know what? I feel like when people are like, on a screen, like, you can get, you can read a certain level of their aura. She's always given me like, good energy. Like, she seems just like, sweet and like, nice.

• 36:11Hannah Berner?

  I was thinking about Dancing with the Stars, though, and how it's so fun with the dancing, but like, what if they did it with singing? Like, what if they found people who can't sing? And each week, you had to sing a song that you were trained? Because I'm sick of these good singers, like, get bad singers.

• 36:28Paige DeSorbo?

  You're gonna executive produce this show. And you're gonna make me host it. And I'm gonna be like, I don't even want to be here. And actually, you guys are really bad.

• 36:36Hannah Berner?

  You're the only judge.

• 36:37Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, I'm the only judge.

• 36:39Hannah Berner?

  And you go, I don't want to be here.

• 36:40Paige DeSorbo?

  And I'm like, sorry, I'd be napping if I wasn't getting paid to be here.

• 36:44Hannah Berner?

  No one's gonna be napping during that show.

• 36:47Paige DeSorbo?

  I feel like as I get older, I am Simon Cowell. Like, I hate everything. I'm like disgusted by so many people I know, like...

• 36:56Hannah Berner?

  Do you know there's an actual thing of, you don't, of people don't get enjoyment from anything? Like, there's a word for it.

• 37:01Paige DeSorbo?

  I have it.

• 37:04Hannah Berner?

  They said if it happens for an elongated period of time, it can be depression.

• 37:08Paige DeSorbo?

  What's a long, what's a long period of time? No, it's not that I hate everything. I'm unimpressed.

• 37:15Hannah Berner?

  Yes.

• 37:15Paige DeSorbo?

  Not to quote your best friend, who, I'm sorry, people aren't talking about this enough. I'm not in competition with people I don't feel inspired by.

• 37:27Paige DeSorbo?

  That, did you hear her say that?

• 37:29Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, well, people thought it was like at Selena.

• 37:31Paige DeSorbo?

  I don't care who people thought it was about. And even if it was, who gives a shit? Like, get over it now. It's been 10 years of this back and forth. We don't care. They're both married. Who cares? That quote alone.

• 37:44Hannah Berner?

  It was beautiful.

• 37:45Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm sorry, it's my new personality.

• 37:46Hannah Berner?

  It was beautiful.

• 37:47Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm not in competition with people I don't feel inspired by. And I think my problem is, is I'm unimpressed by things. That I'm just like, I don't care.

• 37:54Hannah Berner?

  Well, I'm gonna bring us to a moment over the weekend. Um, I was alone in my hotel room.

• 37:58Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 37:59Hannah Berner?

  I was bored.

• 37:59Paige DeSorbo?

  What a day.

• 38:00Hannah Berner?

  I started shopping on the real real. And by shopping, I can't find anything for me. But then I start seeing all these things that I like, maybe Paige will like. So then I start, I sent her like 40 different links. Like, I was just full on shopping for Paige in my head. Um, cause Paige is my barbie doll.

• 38:15Paige DeSorbo?

  Some things were cute.

• 38:16Hannah Berner?

  Okay, well, great, I'm really happy. I basically like, it's like a love language where I'm like, okay, what can make Paige smile today? I'm like, what is she like? I'm gonna send her links of clothes. And it's, if she hates all of them, it does make me laugh. Like, if you go, like, sometimes you'll be like, Hannah, stop.

• 38:35Paige DeSorbo?

  Well, no, because sometimes she'll send me things and it's just like a black t-shirt. I'm like, I'm like, what about, it's Miu Miu.

• 38:44Hannah Berner?

  Also, all I do is buy black t-shirts.

• 38:47Paige DeSorbo?

  Also, all you do is shop vintage. Like, it's on a mannequin. It's not even on a person. I'm like, I can't even see what this is.

• 38:54Hannah Berner?

  Well, that's the thing, you have to have a vision. You have to be a vision, you have to be an artist. Did you actually like some of the stuff I sent?

• 38:58Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, I did.

• 39:00Hannah Berner?

  Am I your stylist?

• 39:01Paige DeSorbo?

  No.

• 39:03Hannah Berner?

  Also, why are you wearing a hat?

• 39:05Paige DeSorbo?

  Because I went to the shoot and I didn't, I don't have a hair tie to throw it up in a ponytail and it's like pushed back.

• 39:11Hannah Berner?

  Cause everyone's here to see your botox.

• 39:12Paige DeSorbo?

  Well, I'll show that. I do feel like it's like settled.

• 39:17Hannah Berner?

  Yeah.

• 39:18Paige DeSorbo?

  I feel like I'm like in, I actually go to Wednesday for like a, a check-in.

• 39:23Hannah Berner?

  When is Daphne getting her facial balancing? She actually has the perfect face.

• 39:29Paige DeSorbo?

  When is Daphne getting lip filler? Because we've all been thinking it.

• 39:32Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, she has no lips.

• 39:34Paige DeSorbo?

  No, Kitty is stunning. She's beautiful, she's gorgeous.

• 39:38Hannah Berner?

  Well, didn't she just, well, she's, she's working. She's booked and busy.

• 39:42Paige DeSorbo?

  She worked today, she has to work tomorrow.

• 39:43Hannah Berner?

  Wait, I feel like I can't, I'm not allowed to say the thing she's working on. It's like.

• 39:47Paige DeSorbo?

  No, it's hot shot. I signed an NDA. I'm like, what?

• 39:52Hannah Berner?

  And good thing she's not all chatty chatty, cause.

• 39:57Paige DeSorbo?

  You would tell everyone.

• 39:58Hannah Berner?

  I have a hot take.

• 39:59Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay.

• 40:00Hannah Berner?

  Cause you, Dez and I are in a temporary place right now.

• 40:04Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay.

• 40:05Hannah Berner?

  We moved into an apartment where if you order Uber Eats, you have to go down to get it. They don't let them bring it up to the door. Now, this is a huge problem.

• 40:16Paige DeSorbo?

  Huge problem. Not in my America.

• 40:19Hannah Berner?

  And some would say you moved out of your last apartment.

• 40:22Paige DeSorbo?

  Some would say that there was one reason I moved and they changed the policy. And I said, and I can no longer do business with you guys.

• 40:32Hannah Berner?

  But hot take.

• 40:33Paige DeSorbo?

  Do you know that that was like a massive thing in my old building? I was like, I'm moving out. And they were like, what can we get for you to stay? I'm like, well, you guys don't bring the groceries, the deliveries up anymore. And like, I can't have that. Like, I'm not going downstairs at midnight to get one slice of pizza from the guy, like.

• 40:49Hannah Berner?

  In my panties.

• 40:49Paige DeSorbo?

  No.

• 40:54Hannah Berner?

  So, this is my hot take. At first I said, no, no, no, no, no. But then I realized, maybe this is good for me. Cause now when I place an order, I have to say it with my chest.

• 41:04Paige DeSorbo?

  Well, do you know, this happened to our good friend Ciara.

• 41:07Hannah Berner?

  What happened?

• 41:08Paige DeSorbo?

  She moved into a building and they don't let delivery people go up and they won't bring it up to your door.

• 41:13Hannah Berner?

  What does delivery people ever do to you? Like, why are they treating them?

• 41:17Paige DeSorbo?

  No. Sorry, they're trying to make a tip. They leave it at the door and they leave.

• 41:22Hannah Berner?

  What the fuck? Like, they have other deliveries to do. Why are they acting like this is crazy?

• 41:27Paige DeSorbo?

  And Ciara said it really makes her stop and think, do I need to order that?

• 41:32Hannah Berner?

  So, I agree with Ciara where I'm like, I say it with my chest.

• 41:36Paige DeSorbo?

  I want you to know I'm living it up. I'm like, yeah, actually do another order. You forgot it.

• 41:43Hannah Berner?

  I said, normally I might eat something and then be like, okay, I'm done, throw it out. Now I'm like, should I save this for lunch? And eat the other half of this burrito, so I'm not. And then sometimes where I just order like for no reason, I'm like, should we order? Cause do I, do I want to lock eyes with this man?

• 42:02Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 42:03Hannah Berner?

  Multiple times a day. But then, then I'm like, do I make an inside joke? But then again, I don't want. I have a bad habit of, um, people, and I'm not telling-

• 42:13Paige DeSorbo?

  Can you find someone at your building, grease them a little, be like, "Hey."

• 42:17Hannah Berner?

  That was so Italian of you.

• 42:19Paige DeSorbo?

  Anytime I got a delivery, you bring it right up to me.

• 42:22Hannah Berner?

  I go, "Hey, what's the last time we got a blowjob?"

• 42:25Hannah Berner?

  What's this old school?

• 42:26Paige DeSorbo?

  You can take a fry off the top, but that's it.

• 42:30Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, we go half and halfies. That's like when we were so like-

• 42:32Paige DeSorbo?

  Do you know who invented room service?

• 42:35Hannah Berner?

  Jackie O.

• 42:37Paige DeSorbo?

  Ooh, great guess. The Waldorf Astoria Hotel invented room service in like nineteen-

• 42:48Hannah Berner?

  Did you do a dissertation on room service?

• 42:50Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm obsessed with room service. I remember the moment I realized what it was. I was like four years old and my mom was like, "They'll bring it to the room." And I was like, "What?" This is crazy. I genuinely think that's why I moved to New York City, because I was like, "Room service."

• 43:05Hannah Berner?

  One of the greatest memories of my childhood was my parents went to a wedding in Philadelphia and Daniel and I got to stay back at the hotel room. And my mom said, "You guys can just order room service." Great, great, we had a rageur.

• 43:19Paige DeSorbo?

  Greatest night of your life.

• 43:20Hannah Berner?

  Greatest night of my life.

• 43:21Paige DeSorbo?

  Tell me it was two queen beds.

• 43:23Hannah Berner?

  Yes, two queen beds. Maybe we just walked, just jumping over, yeah. French fries.

• 43:29Paige DeSorbo?

  No, room service is the best. And like Uber Eats is basically room service if you live.

• 43:34Hannah Berner?

  And this is the problem with New York City. Anything you're in the mood for, like you literally are like, "I want, um, a chicken parmigiana with a Penjol vodka." But I also would like, and then after that I'll have some sushi and-

• 43:45Paige DeSorbo?

  Tie with Italian fusion.

• 43:46Hannah Berner?

  Like, oh, and you'll find it. It's right there. You will find it. So gnocchi with a Sejuan delight, like, it's, they have it. So it's like every need is right at your fingertips. It's so naughty.

• 44:02Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay, wait, this actually is so like reverse. Except my Chinese food place, which is like best Chinese food in New York City.

• 44:12Hannah Berner?

  Yes.

• 44:12Paige DeSorbo?

  Once, when you move also, that's a whole thing. You have to

• 44:15Hannah Berner?

  Find your places.

• 44:16Paige DeSorbo?

  Chinese food places. It's like, it's really stressful. My place is the best ever, but they're so old school that they're not on any of the apps.

• 44:25Hannah Berner?

  Do you have to text?

• 44:26Paige DeSorbo?

  They're not even on Postmates. I mean, not even, not even Grubhub. You have to call, you have to place your order, you pay over the phone and they

• 44:36Hannah Berner?

  You give them the credit card number?

• 44:38Paige DeSorbo?

  They have their own delivery, like their own deliver people.

• 44:42Hannah Berner?

  Yeah.

• 44:42Paige DeSorbo?

  And it's just for the area. And it feels so nineties. Like I'm almost like I have a cord on my phone.

• 44:48Hannah Berner?

  You feel like you're in Sex and the City, like

• 44:51Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, and they're like, for how many? And I'm like, for one.

• 44:55Hannah Berner?

  Does Daphne ever try to eat your human food?

• 45:00Paige DeSorbo?

  Cause some

• 45:00Hannah Berner?

  You're like the third person that asks me this tonight. Look, she's looking on a sick lately.

• 45:06Paige DeSorbo?

  No, she genuinely has zero interest in any human food. And I've had like salmon or like any like little like pieces of chicken and she'll sniff it. But she's like, if it's not in my dish, I don't care about it.

• 45:21Hannah Berner?

  So cats, like all cats are different. My mom has a cat who every night when they sit down for dinner, the cat thinks my mom cooked dinner for him.

• 45:30Paige DeSorbo?

  Mm-hmm.

• 45:30Hannah Berner?

  And he sits

• 45:31Paige DeSorbo?

  Just like a man.

• 45:34Hannah Berner?

  He sits on her lap and as she goes to take a bite, he takes his paw and paws her hand like, get that fork towards me. She, he eats pork chops, he eats penne, he eats turkey burgers.

• 45:46Paige DeSorbo?

  Does butter?

• 45:48Hannah Berner?

  No, well, okay, butter will, what I'm eating, she'll come and sit and just stare. She's not knowing about it. She just stares. And I'll, I'll have a little piece of chicken or something and I'll put it down for her. She looks at it like she's never seen something. Every time she eats, she acts like, she's like, oh my god, what is this? Smells it for like 10 minutes and then eats it and then I give her a little. So we have like our fun little game.

• 46:07Paige DeSorbo?

  Mm-hmm. One of the best parts about having, I think, a cat is that it's not like a dog. Dogs are so fucking annoying when you're about to eat. It's almost like, who told you? I didn't even tell you that.

• 46:20Hannah Berner?

  Wait, okay, I'm gonna say something controversial, and I don't like, I love dogs.

• 46:24Paige DeSorbo?

  Totally.

• 46:24Hannah Berner?

  We love dogs.

• 46:25Paige DeSorbo?

  No, I do love dogs.

• 46:26Hannah Berner?

  But I love dogs like I love men, where like, yeah, they're great until you hang out with them. Like, until they open their mouth.

• 46:34Paige DeSorbo?

  And start talking.

• 46:36Hannah Berner?

  In the room with them, and you see how they like move through life, you're like, this is.

• 46:40Paige DeSorbo?

  Once you've committed, you're like, oh.

• 46:43Hannah Berner?

  The second you pet them, their little red wiener pops out, and I'm like, I'm not trying to fuck you.

• 46:48Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, I'm like, aren't you fixed? Didn't you get fixed? How do you still have the urge?

• 46:53Hannah Berner?

  Also, why are we walking, running around, and yeah, yeah, yeah?

• 46:56Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 46:57Hannah Berner?

  This is my thing.

• 46:58Paige DeSorbo?

  They're always talking about things they don't know about.

• 46:59Hannah Berner?

  I'm, yeah. I'm very subtle about like most people getting cats. Like, I do the whole plant a seed, in six years, they decide they want a cat.

• 47:08Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 47:08Hannah Berner?

  But I was with a friend, and she's like, I wanna get a dog. And by the way, this is like New York City. I just looked her in the face. I said, with my chest. I said.

• 47:17Paige DeSorbo?

  Are you fucking kidding me?

• 47:19Hannah Berner?

  I said, and she was like, I like dogs, sorry, you don't like dogs, I like dogs. And I said, okay, think, the whole idea of getting a dog, great. Have you ever been at a person's place with a dog, and they're not annoyed by the dog? Like, it's always them being like, sit down, hold on a sec, sit down, stop, stop, get up, not there, not there, don't do this.

• 47:36Paige DeSorbo?

  Sure, let me let the dog out.

• 47:38Hannah Berner?

  I think that people are like, brainwashed to think that they love their dog, when actually, their dog is ruining their life. And I know people whose relationships have ended because they couldn't have sex, because their dog would bark the whole time. So my thing is.

• 47:53Paige DeSorbo?

  The first six months with a puppy?

• 47:55Hannah Berner?

  Oh, no.

• 47:56Paige DeSorbo?

  I once had a boyfriend who was like, we're gonna have so many golden retrievers, and I literally said, over my dead fucking body.

• 48:02Hannah Berner?

  If you want a dog and you wanna deal with that kind of hardship in your life, just have a baby. Like, just have a baby. My thing is, I feel like people don't like cats, then you have your own cat, and people are, like, you walk into someone's apartment, they're like, this is my cat, I'm obsessed with them, they're amazing. When you walk into someone's apartment with a dog, they're like, I'm so sorry. They just start apologizing for their dog. All they do is apologize.

• 48:19Paige DeSorbo?

  Can't go on a trip.

• 48:20Hannah Berner?

  Can't go on a trip. You have to walk it in the rain.

• 48:23Paige DeSorbo?

  No. Every day you have to walk it.

• 48:25Hannah Berner?

  But maybe that's their version of love is like taking care of something. And I know people are like, oh, your dog loves you so much. If it loves me so much, why is he being annoying?

• 48:33Paige DeSorbo?

  And why will he run away at any second?

• 48:35Hannah Berner?

  And yeah, he's a heat.

• 48:36Paige DeSorbo?

  You open the door, you open the door, a dog is bolting out. He's trying to get away. He's trying to go find the next best thing. You open the door, the cat's like, shut the door. Like, people are out there, ew.

• 48:48Hannah Berner?

  My favorite is cats, indoor cats looking at outdoor cats being like, you disgust me.

• 48:54Paige DeSorbo?

  No, the best was Daphne looking at your rescue cats being like, when you said, do they even know their parents, mom? Who's your dad?

• 49:08Hannah Berner?

  She goes, you guys don't even have an Instagram page.

• 49:11Paige DeSorbo?

  Mom.

• 49:11Hannah Berner?

  They've never done one, Brandell.

• 49:15Paige DeSorbo?

  Do you guys go to work?

• 49:16Hannah Berner?

  Daphne's when an influencer gets invited to an event that she has the most followers. And she's like, why am I here? Why did my PR send me here? There's not even a step or a beat. Like, why did I get all made up for this? This place is disgusting. I'm wasting my time and I had to pay for the Ubers.

• 49:32Paige DeSorbo?

  They didn't even send a gar.

• 49:35Paige DeSorbo?

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• 50:20Paige DeSorbo?

  Start your free online visit today at hers.com/giggly for personalized hair. That's F-O-R-H-E-R-S dot com slash giggly for hers dot com slash giggly.

• 50:32Paige DeSorbo?

  Individual results may vary. Featured products include compounded drug products which the FDA does not approve or verify for safety, effectiveness, or quality. Prescription required. Prices vary based on product and subscription plan. See website for full details, restrictions, and important safety information. I've always wanted to be more consistent with strength training, but my biggest problem is getting to the gym and thinking, okay, now what? I'll do a few exercises I remember, maybe pull something up I saved on Instagram, but there's really never any planning behind it and you know I hate a workout class. That's why I've been loving the Ladder app. I can open it and my workout is already planned and I can do it anywhere. You have an expert coach and you know exactly what exercises you're doing,

• 51:13Paige DeSorbo?

  how many sets, how many reps, and the in-ear coaching gives you cues and motivation throughout the workout. It genuinely feels like you have a personal trainer in your headphones. I've been using this for a while now and I also feel and see myself getting stronger each day because of Ladder. I have also been eyeing their Pilates workout routines for a little while now, so that will definitely be my next workout venture. And for less than $1 a day, you can't beat it. And I love that Ladder remembers my weights, reps, and sets because I can actually see my progress instead of wondering whether I'm doing it all correctly. Plus, you can get a new plan every week that builds on the last. Remove the guesswork with Ladder and get a real coach in your ear telling you exactly what to do for every workout.

• 51:54Paige DeSorbo?

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• 52:36Paige DeSorbo?

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• 53:19Hannah Berner?

  Gigglers, the holidays are coming and Arm & Hammer Hardball Cat Litter and I are making sure all my fellow cat parents are guest ready. You guys know I'm obsessed with cats. I'm a cat missionary and make sure everyone in my life has a cat and I'm doing really well at it. I foster and I'm constantly trying to help cats find homes. And around the holidays, I basically want everyone I know to fall in love with a cat and take one home. But the holidays, you guys are hosting, you have your cat and you have such a to do list, you know? Hiding things in closets, pretending you're clean, pulling out the snacks. One thing I do not need to add to that list is worrying about cat smell. Arm & Hammer Hardball Cat Litter keeps odors under control and forms compact clumps that make cleanup easy. So, that part is already handled in the background.

• 54:02Hannah Berner?

  So, then I can focus on my guests and maybe convince one of them they need a cat. For all my fellow cat parents, be guest ready with Arm & Hammer Hardball Cat Litter. Find it now at Walmart or Amazon.

• 54:15Paige DeSorbo?

  Wait.

• 54:16Hannah Berner?

  Oh, what happened?

• 54:17Paige DeSorbo?

  I figured out who my big three are. These are my big three of my favorite people ever. Ready?

• 54:23Hannah Berner?

  And wait, when you say favorite, like what does that mean?

• 54:25Paige DeSorbo?

  We don't know. Just like right now for this moment.

• 54:28Hannah Berner?

  Okay, in pop culture.

• 54:29Paige DeSorbo?

  Dakota Johnson, Aubrey Plaza, Allison Williams.

• 54:35Paige DeSorbo?

  I love all three of them equally. And somehow I feel like they're all like a similar font of person. And I feel aligned with them.

• 54:47Hannah Berner?

  Wait, I love how this is your energy moving. Cause I feel like these girls are more, you know what you just listed?

• 54:55Paige DeSorbo?

  Five years ago, that wouldn't have been my list.

• 54:57Hannah Berner?

  You know what you just listed? Three female comedians.

• 55:01Hannah Berner?

  Three female comedians. Dakota Johnson, hilarious.

• 55:03Paige DeSorbo?

  I think Dakota Johnson is one of the funniest unintentional funny people. Aubrey Plaza, her personality in gen- like her baseline.

• 55:12Hannah Berner?

  Like an Oscar.

• 55:15Paige DeSorbo?

  People need to put her in more things.

• 55:16Hannah Berner?

  Put her in more things. I mean, but, and then Alison Williams.

• 55:20Paige DeSorbo?

  I just like her vibe.

• 55:22Hannah Berner?

  Girls?

• 55:23Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 55:23Hannah Berner?

  Well, but so they're, you know what it is? They're funny, but they're also hot.

• 55:27Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 55:28Hannah Berner?

  And they're successful.

• 55:29Paige DeSorbo?

  And I love it.

• 55:30Hannah Berner?

  Where I feel like back in the day, you were more aesthetic. Like you, you just wanted to say, you didn't care if they like couldn't carry a conversation.

• 55:37Paige DeSorbo?

  My big three would have been Victoria Beckham. But she's like still in, she's, she's top.

• 55:42Hannah Berner?

  She's your friend now.

• 55:43Paige DeSorbo?

  Right now, she's top. She oversees.

• 55:45Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's.

• 55:46Paige DeSorbo?

  But back in the day, it would have been Victoria Beckham.

• 55:48Hannah Berner?

  These are your Barbie dolls you're talking about.

• 55:50Paige DeSorbo?

  This is my Barbie house. They don't play with each other, okay?

• 55:52Hannah Berner?

  This is my pussy palace.

• 55:55Paige DeSorbo?

  Victoria Beckham, Kim Kardashian. And I don't know who my third would have been.

• 55:59Hannah Berner?

  Her and Kim are.

• 56:00Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 56:00Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, they can't be touched.

• 56:01Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 56:02Hannah Berner?

  But this, I'm obsessed with this energy for you. Who's your favorite style of these three?

• 56:07Paige DeSorbo?

  Ooh, probably Dakota Johnson.

• 56:10Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, she's really good.

• 56:11Paige DeSorbo?

  She's just like cool.

• 56:13Hannah Berner?

  Well, she pulls off bangs.

• 56:14Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, and Aubrey Plaza gets away with being like sarcastic, mean, like dark energy, and I like that.

• 56:23Hannah Berner?

  Do you know what also all three of them have?

• 56:26Paige DeSorbo?

  Great hair.

• 56:27Hannah Berner?

  Great hair. And also, they do not, um, they're not like nice girls. Like they're not like trying to conform to be likeable. There's like an, I don't want to say unlikableness of them, but it's more they're authentic. Where they don't care that they have stereotypical things that might not be likeable to them.

• 56:45Paige DeSorbo?

  There's an authenticity that makes them feel real. They're not liked by everyone, and that's a good thing.

• 56:51Hannah Berner?

  Yes.

• 56:52Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, you don't want to be liked by everyone.

• 56:54Hannah Berner?

  I, I do find.

• 56:55Paige DeSorbo?

  You need to have like 10 top tier haters. You know, like that key, and I'm not kidding.

• 57:01Hannah Berner?

  They keep you relevant.

• 57:02Paige DeSorbo?

  You need a good roster of haters. And you need to feed them. Like every so often. Because their feedback, it only motivates you. And they, and you know when they're thinking about you. They'll drop like subtle hints and all.

• 57:17Hannah Berner?

  Have you ever like not been hated on and felt a little emptiness in you and been like, oh, nobody cared to hate on that? I'm.

• 57:26Paige DeSorbo?

  No, I wouldn't. I'd like that at any point. I have noticed though, like over the years, my haters, like people that I feel like really, really hate me, I wouldn't even like be friends with them, let alone like envy them or wanna be them. You know, like I've never been hated on someone where I'm like, fuck, I like really, I'm jealous about that, like that of them or like, I wanna have what they have or like, yeah, respect them.

• 57:53Paige DeSorbo?

  Or felt like they were normal people.

• 57:54Hannah Berner?

  I just have to say, we got really, I don't know if lucky is the word, but like, I'm very grateful. There's a lot of people of people who follow them.

• 58:03Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 58:03Hannah Berner?

  Who like, they hate their, no, no, they, people, I don't wanna, also like I don't even call, like the gigglers are not fans, they're best friends, but there are people who like hate their fans. Like they're doing their thing and then they like go to a show and they see the people that,

• 58:17Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 58:17Hannah Berner?

  that are buying their stuff or like love them or follow, and they're like, like I know comedians who hate their fans. And I'm like, that says more about you than them. Like you're not look, your fans are a mirror of what you're putting out into the world.

• 58:29Paige DeSorbo?

  The moment I realized like gigglers aren't fans.

• 58:33Hannah Berner?

  I've never said the F word.

• 58:34Paige DeSorbo?

  Is when I had a panic attack and I went out on stage and you were like, just tell them. Tell, come on, tell them.

• 58:40Hannah Berner?

  Just tell them they'll be okay.

• 58:41Paige DeSorbo?

  And I was like, guys?

• 58:43Hannah Berner?

  But I also feel like people will like have one viral video and be like, they fans.

• 58:51Hannah Berner?

  It's like a loosely used term nowadays.

• 58:54Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 58:55Hannah Berner?

  It's, yeah, I don't like that term, but it's just the people who want to consume your content, like the fact that it's girls that we would be friends with.

• 59:03Paige DeSorbo?

  Right.

• 59:03Hannah Berner?

  Is like, we're very lucky.

• 59:06Paige DeSorbo?

  I just thought of another thing to hate on a man about. I restarted Scandal.

• 59:12Hannah Berner?

  Grace is watching it.

• 59:13Paige DeSorbo?

  You are? What, what season are you in? I'm at season three. It's starting to get a little bit crazy where you're like, okay, I don't know what's going on.

• 59:21Hannah Berner?

  So good.

• 59:23Paige DeSorbo?

  It's so good and I have not.

• 59:24Hannah Berner?

  How gorgeous is she?

• 59:26Paige DeSorbo?

  Hold on, let me just, hold on, because I have a list in my head. I haven't watched Scandal. I think I tried to restart it during COVID, but I, I like, didn't get through it. But I haven't watched it since it was genuinely like on TV. I think it was in like 2012.

• 59:40Hannah Berner?

  Yeah.

• 59:41Paige DeSorbo?

  So many things, top line. One, I don't know why Kerry Washington doesn't get talked about more for her fashion, specifically at that time period, because she was so peak 2012, 2013 fashion. But in that show, she always looked so good. So like, I, one, I don't think she gets enough accolades for like her role in fashion in general. Two, she's so gorgeous. She's so good in it. The whole show is her. Shonda Rhimes also doesn't get enough like award. No, sorry. She's made every good show I've ever watched.

• 1:00:14Hannah Berner?

  She'd be on Mount Rushmore.

• 1:00:15Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm like, wait, guys, I don't think we're like actually putting it together. She's made Scandal, Grey's Anatomy, Bridgerton.

• 1:00:24Hannah Berner?

  Do you know Grey's Anatomy is still going on?

• 1:00:26Paige DeSorbo?

  Still on.

• 1:00:27Hannah Berner?

  I didn't know that.

• 1:00:28Paige DeSorbo?

  Still on. No, the woman is like collectively as a whole, we don't speak about her enough.

• 1:00:34Paige DeSorbo?

  My last thing.

• 1:00:35Hannah Berner?

  I hope you're gonna say what I think you're gonna say.

• 1:00:37Paige DeSorbo?

  Why the fuck did they want her with the president? Why did all of America love the couple that is her and the president? I'm sorry, he's the worst character of all time, ever. He's an awful character. He's so mean to his wife. He's so mean to her. He acts like such, like, sorry, because you're the president, you're like so entitled. You can treat your wife like absolute shit.

• 1:01:03Hannah Berner?

  Paige.

• 1:01:03Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:04Hannah Berner?

  You healed.

• 1:01:05Paige DeSorbo?

  No, I'm like, I-

• 1:01:06Hannah Berner?

  You've healed.

• 1:01:06Paige DeSorbo?

  I just can't believe I loved it.

• 1:01:09Hannah Berner?

  Because sometimes people see a guy who's being an asshole and be like, oh, I'm gonna change him. Like, I like him. You've healed.

• 1:01:13Paige DeSorbo?

  No, I literally want him impeached.

• 1:01:17Hannah Berner?

  Wait, but like, he's not, he's a little bit zaddy.

• 1:01:20Paige DeSorbo?

  Oh, he's so fucking hot.

• 1:01:21Hannah Berner?

  He's so hot.

• 1:01:22Paige DeSorbo?

  Where is that actor?

• 1:01:24Hannah Berner?

  He's around.

• 1:01:24Paige DeSorbo?

  Why isn't he in more things?

• 1:01:26Hannah Berner?

  Also, are they dating in real life, I think?

• 1:01:27Paige DeSorbo?

  No, no.

• 1:01:30Paige DeSorbo?

  They're both married, but like, they did an award show, they like presented at something not too long ago, and everyone was like, ah, blocking the way he touched the back of her.

• 1:01:39Hannah Berner?

  I'm gonna say it right now, as someone in a relationship. I know.

• 1:01:44Paige DeSorbo?

  You would fuck that man? As someone who's really committed, I would have sex with that guy.

• 1:01:49Hannah Berner?

  Just that, like, I'm watching how people act on like Dancing with the Stars.

• 1:01:53Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:53Hannah Berner?

  Like, I'm sorry, if your husband was like dancing with one of these girls and like, I'm watching like Val and Alex Earl, and he's like, he's like, closer to my face, more passion, more passion.

• 1:02:02Paige DeSorbo?

  And he like pulls her in by the vagina.

• 1:02:03Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, he's like, more passion. No, like, I'm-

• 1:02:05Paige DeSorbo?

  He's like, if you just put your vagina on me, that's how the dance moves.

• 1:02:08Hannah Berner?

  I know, there's a dance world is like, we're dancing. That's cheating. You're, you're just cheating with rules.

• 1:02:13Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay, wait, okay, wait though, question. If you were married to an actor.

• 1:02:19Hannah Berner?

  Divorce.

• 1:02:22Paige DeSorbo?

  If you were married, wait, if you're married to an actor and he's gotta go do this movie, and in the movie, he has to make out and be in a relationship with someone and have a sex scene with them, are you like, I'm coming to sex every day?

• 1:02:36Hannah Berner?

  No, I'm never coming to sex because I don't like to go anywhere. But it's, it's like how he handles it. I've actually been in a relationship before where a guy acted, I was like kissing a girl.

• 1:02:46Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:46Hannah Berner?

  And it's how he talked about it to me.

• 1:02:49Paige DeSorbo?

  Yes.

• 1:02:49Hannah Berner?

  That was what I didn't respect or like about it. I was like, you're trying to piss me off.

• 1:02:53Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:53Hannah Berner?

  But if someone, like, look, I want you to come in and be like, oh, I have this sex scene with this girl, she's the worst.

• 1:02:58Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah. I mean, like, she's so ugly, I can't even look at her.

• 1:03:02Hannah Berner?

  I like, I start, I started to puke during the last scene, I don't know what to do. Great person, we love her, like, so good on the inside, so upset that I have to do this sex scene today. I couldn't eat lunch beforehand.

• 1:03:13Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, it's about how you, it's how you go about it.

• 1:03:15Hannah Berner?

  But like, there's a reason why actors can't keep relationships. There's a reason why they all fuck each other in movies.

• 1:03:22Paige DeSorbo?

  If you're my boyfriend, if you're my boyfriend and we're talking about a pretty person, if you don't turn to me and say, not prettier than you though, get out of my life.

• 1:03:32Hannah Berner?

  Hot take? Do you know what they say? If you want to go to sleep, you have to pretend you're sleeping?

• 1:03:37Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:38Hannah Berner?

  Acting is pretending. So you pretending you're kissing her is you kissing her.

• 1:03:43Paige DeSorbo?

  See, I don't think I would get mad. Well, people say, which I'm waiting for you, because you're my only friend. People say that like when you get married, and you've been married for like a long time, like, not cheating, like not like cheating on your spouse, but like every once in a while, like you're flirting with someone. Like at some point in your life, you're gonna flirt with someone again.

• 1:04:05Hannah Berner?

  Well flirting is is just like fun. It's like a hobby that you take up occasionally.

• 1:04:12Paige DeSorbo?

  Now, see, that would annoy me more than my husband going to work and doing his scheduled sex scenes.

• 1:04:18Hannah Berner?

  See, this is.

• 1:04:21Hannah Berner?

  You have it on your Google Calendar?

• 1:04:22Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, I'm like, oh, interesting.

• 1:04:23Hannah Berner?

  Well, this is the thing. I'm, I can be, you know, jokey jokey, you know? And some would argue that a girl trying to be funny

• 1:04:32Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 1:04:33Hannah Berner?

  is flirtatious. And like my husband is a comedian. Like, he walks into a room and he makes women laugh. And I like that. Maybe I'm a little freaky.

• 1:04:41Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 1:04:42Hannah Berner?

  You know, that's what I do.

• 1:04:45Paige DeSorbo?

  You like when girls like.

• 1:04:48Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, I like that girls think Dez is handsome or funny. If if my friends are coming up to me grossed out by him, I'd be like, I don't like him either anymore.

• 1:04:58Hannah Berner?

  I'm easily manipulated by peer pressure.

• 1:05:04Hannah Berner?

  If you, if Dez walks in and you give me a look like ew, I'm like, we're done.

• 1:05:07Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:08Hannah Berner?

  We are done. But but look, men are gonna be attracted to women.

• 1:05:12Paige DeSorbo?

  Totally.

• 1:05:13Hannah Berner?

  That's, I hope he's attracted to women. It's the sex scenes in the movies. I'm surprised that. Yeah, I'm surprised they let it let it happen.

• 1:05:22Paige DeSorbo?

  As someone who.

• 1:05:24Hannah Berner?

  It should be illegal. I don't like that they're like, oh, I'm an actor. Yeah, he's acting like he didn't enjoy that.

• 1:05:30Paige DeSorbo?

  As someone who had a make out scene at 16

• 1:05:33Hannah Berner?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:05:34Paige DeSorbo?

  years old. And had a boyfriend at home.

• 1:05:40Hannah Berner?

  You cheated.

• 1:05:41Paige DeSorbo?

  No, I mean technically, I mean, yeah, I guess I did. But this is, I should have known then, my brain was so programmed of like, this is work. Like, why would you even care about this? And I remember my high school boyfriend being like, but you made out with someone. And I was like, for a paycheck? Like.

• 1:05:59Hannah Berner?

  But like, was the guy hot?

• 1:06:01Paige DeSorbo?

  He was so hot. Do you know that I ran into him like 10 years later on the streets of New York City? We literally walked by each other on the street and like, looked at each other and like, passed? And like, both turned, like, was that? And I never saw him again. His name is Neil. I know that.

• 1:06:19Hannah Berner?

  Alright, first of all, I'm out.

• 1:06:21Paige DeSorbo?

  So first of all, no.

• 1:06:22Hannah Berner?

  Your boyfriend should have been upset because you almost married that man.

• 1:06:25Paige DeSorbo?

  I almost saw Neil on the street and made, I wish I could find him now.

• 1:06:30Hannah Berner?

  Neil, or if there's a girl listening who's dating Neil.

• 1:06:34Paige DeSorbo?

  It was a Robert Pattinson commercial. You've gotta remember it.

• 1:06:38Hannah Berner?

  But you've been booked and busy since you're like six.

• 1:06:40Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, no, this was like a while ago, so he probably is like, married somewhere.

• 1:06:44Hannah Berner?

  Well, they say when you make out, you're like, not supposed to use tongue, even though it looks like you're using tongue? So they do like fake make outs?

• 1:06:50Paige DeSorbo?

  I have a trick that I do sometimes.

• 1:06:52Hannah Berner?

  What do you do?

• 1:06:53Paige DeSorbo?

  Okay. If you kiss someone for six seconds, like you can't take your lips off though. Like, has to stay constant contact for six seconds. After the six seconds, both of your bodies have now like, aligned. And it makes like your sex ba- like then you're immediately, like you're gonna have sex after six seconds.

• 1:07:16Hannah Berner?

  Wow.

• 1:07:16Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah. Try it.

• 1:07:18Hannah Berner?

  So you just like, you're like, five, six, seven, eight, and one?

• 1:07:21Paige DeSorbo?

  No, I can count.

• 1:07:21Hannah Berner?

  Does he know you're doing that?

• 1:07:22Paige DeSorbo?

  No.

• 1:07:23Hannah Berner?

  No.

• 1:07:24Paige DeSorbo?

  If you stay for six seconds, it only makes a bed because you connect like.

• 1:07:28Hannah Berner?

  Can you tell how to take, sometimes I just wanna kiss.

• 1:07:30Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, same.

• 1:07:31Hannah Berner?

  It's really annoying, like I'll go to kiss, and then does, Ame is like, are we having sex? And I'm like, where did you get that from, you freak?

• 1:07:38Paige DeSorbo?

  And I know it's so funny. I am does. And I'm like, okay, but we're grown, so even like.

• 1:07:44Hannah Berner?

  I'm like, well, like, just because you kiss, like, I didn't.

• 1:07:47Paige DeSorbo?

  Do you know I've been in?

• 1:07:50Hannah Berner?

  By the way, women are their horniest in their 30s. Chris, write that down.

• 1:07:53Paige DeSorbo?

  Do you know I've been in so many relationships where I've just never kissed them?

• 1:07:56Hannah Berner?

  I know.

• 1:07:58Paige DeSorbo?

  Like, actually to the point where I'm like, is that a made up thing?

• 1:08:01Hannah Berner?

  You go, "No kissing, baby. No touchy-touchy. No kissing."

• 1:08:05Paige DeSorbo?

  Like, I'm just like, gross. I'm not kissing you.

• 1:08:07Hannah Berner?

  Yeah. Well, you hated them.

• 1:08:08Paige DeSorbo?

  Yeah, that's true.

• 1:08:10Hannah Berner?

  That's a sign.

• 1:08:10Paige DeSorbo?

  That is so true. Your nails look good.

• 1:08:12Hannah Berner?

  Thanks. It's grown out. I did do, um, sports modeling back in the day and it was like me and this like hot guy model. And we spent all day together and like, it's actually a really good way to meet people.

• 1:08:23Paige DeSorbo?

  Yep. Being a model?

• 1:08:24Hannah Berner?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:26Paige DeSorbo?

  I'm sure they're not.

• 1:08:28Hannah Berner?

  Like, I was like, where have you been? You're a hot man in New York City that's forced to hang out with me for eight hours? And by the end, I was like, we're dating.

• 1:08:35Paige DeSorbo?

  Justice for models. They want to date too.

• 1:08:38Hannah Berner?

  Justice for models?

• 1:08:39Paige DeSorbo?

  They also have trouble dating.

• 1:08:41Hannah Berner?

  Yeah, models do have trouble. Thank you guys so much.

• 1:08:47Hannah Berner?

  Thank you for giggling with us. We love you so much. Um, wait, where am I going? Oh, I'm going to Medford in Boston and I'm going to Portland, Maine.

• 1:08:55Paige DeSorbo?

  And I'm just gonna be right here in the Big Apple.

• 1:08:57Hannah Berner?

  Yep, the Big Apple. We love you so much. Thanks for giggling. Bye, guys.

• 1:09:07Speaker 04

  What's up, sports fans? I'm Rachel Damita, here to tell you about my show Courtside Club. If you love hoops and hot takes, then you're in the right place. Want to hear about Katelyn Clark's unstoppable rise in the WNBA? How stars like Wemby and Luka Doncic are dominating the NBA? Or maybe you just want the tea on this week's most viral sports moments? Don't worry, we'll keep you updated on all of it. So grab your popcorn and come hang with us. Courtside. You can listen to Courtside Club wherever you get your podcasts. Oui et ah.

• 1:09:38Speaker 05

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