How To Find Purpose In What You Do, Overcome Insecurities & Destroy Fear In 2022 EP 1210

As we’re coming into the new year, it’s an opportunity to reinvent yourself. It’s a time to take inventory of what parts of your life you love and the other parts that you want to improve. A big part of achieving greatness in your life is to find purpose and meaning in what you’re doing and learn how to show up as your best self each and every day. In this episode we discuss how to find purpose and meaning in your life with Jay Shetty, how to overcome insecurities and build confidence with Priyanka Chopra, where suffering comes from and how you can maximize your potential in life with Sadhguru, how to not let fear get in the way of your purpose with Lisa Nichols and so much more! For more go to: www.lewishowes.com/1210Jay Shetty's episode: www.lewishowes.com/953Lisa Nichols' episode: www.lewishowes.com/979Sadhguru's episode: www.lewishowes.com/965Priyanka Chopra's episode: www.lewishowes.com/1067 Get more from Lewis! Get my New York Times Bestselling book, Make Money Easy! Get The Greatness Mindset audiobook on SpotifyText Lewis AIYouTubeInstagramWebsiteTiktokFacebookX

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Lewis Howes?

  This is episode number 1,210, all about finding and pursuing your purpose. Welcome to the School of Greatness. My name is Lewis Howes, a former pro athlete turned lifestyle entrepreneur. And each week, we bring you an inspiring person or message to help you discover how to unlock your inner greatness. Thanks for spending some time with me today. Now let the class begin.

• 0:31Lewis Howes?

  My friend, welcome back. As we're coming into the new year, it's an opportunity to reinvent yourself. It's a time where you can take inventory of what parts of your life you love and the other parts that you want to improve upon as you set new goals. And a big part of achieving greatness in your life is to find purpose and meaning. And a really meaningful purpose that lights you up, that gets you excited, that makes you want to jump out of bed in what you're doing and how you learn and how you show up as your best self each day and every moment that you possibly can. It's a constant journey, but it's always worth prioritizing and pursuing. So in this episode, we discuss how to find purpose and meaning in your life with my dear friend Jay Shetty.

• 1:16Lewis Howes?

  How to not let fear get in the way of your purpose with Lisa Nichols. Where suffering comes from and how you can maximize your potential in life with Sadhguru. How to overcome insecurities and build confidence with Priyanka Chopra and so much more. If you're inspired by this message, please share this with a few friends that you can think would be inspired by this as well. It's all about spreading the message of greatness to more people. So if you're enjoying this, just copy and paste the link wherever you're listening to this podcast, or you can go right to lewishowes.com/1210 and share that link out. And I want to give a big thanks to the fan of the week. This is from Holdy, who said, "Look forward to listening every week.

• 2:00Lewis Howes?

  It's the best content on living up to your optimal potential and so uplifting. Totally fuels my curiosity about things I may have never considered and also things that really matter to me." So big thank you and a shout out to Holdy for leaving a review over on Apple Podcasts and being our fan of the week. Okay, in just a moment, it's time to learn how to find purpose and meaning in your life.

• 2:27Lewis Howes?

  2022 is going to be a big year for a lot of businesses, but some industries are projected to grow even more this year like home improvement. I see you DIYers out there on TikTok, the fitness industry, whether it be apps or studios or the pet service industry with all the furry friends adopted during COVID. And if you work for or own your own business in one of these growing industries or a wide range of other industries, you probably need to hire ASAP. There's only one place to go, ZipRecruiter. And right now you can try it for free at ziprecruiter.com/greatness. ZipRecruiter uses powerful technology to find and match the right candidates up with your job. Then it proactively presents these candidates to you.

• 3:09Lewis Howes?

  And ZipRecruiter's technology is so effective that four out of five employers who post on ZipRecruiter get a quality candidate within the first day. And now you can try ZipRecruiter for free at this exclusive web address, ziprecruiter.com/greatness. That's ziprecruiter.com/greatness. ZipRecruiter, the smartest way to hire.

• 3:34Lewis Howes?

  In this first section, number one New York Times bestselling author and former monk, Jay Shetty, shares how to find purpose and meaning in what you do, how to go from what he calls a monkey mind to a monk mind, and how to live more abundantly.

• 3:50Jay Shetty?

  I think it was Albert Einstein who said it best that not everything that can be counted counts and not everything that counts can be counted. And I love that because it removes this belief that things are finite and limited. And they're not. If you want to be happy and successful, if no matter that there are 700,000 podcasts, if that is your Dharma, if that's your calling, if that's your purpose. Like, you can do that. There's no cap on how many successful soccer players that can exist at the same time.

• 4:25Lewis Howes?

  Or how many books are out in the world.

• 4:26Jay Shetty?

  There's no cap. There's no one stopping you. And that's the mindset that we're educated for that scarcity and greed.

• 4:32Lewis Howes?

  And what's the difference between the monkey mind and the monk mind?

• 4:35Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, I'm glad you brought that up. So the monkey mind is what we experience on a day to day basis. The monkey mind is restless. The monkey mind is jumping from branch to branch. The monkey mind is trying to find a bigger banana. The monkey mind is constantly just like feeling flustered, dissatisfied, scarce and overthinking everything. The monk mind is the exact opposite. The monk mind is calm and composed. The monk mind knows to be focused and aware. The monk mind knows. So everything in this book and everything that we're talking about is the transformation from the monkey mind that we experience to the monk mind. The monkey mind is almost the enemy to the monk mind. It's the opposite.

• 5:17Lewis Howes?

  And how does someone who is living in a sense of scarcity? Because there are people living in scarcity where they're unable to pay their bills, they're unable to provide food for their kids, they're single moms, they're stressed, they're stressed, they're overwhelmed. It's hard to get into a sense of abundance when you're in scarcity and stress. So how does someone find purpose in chaos? When they can't even get out of the thinking because they're just trying to survive?

• 5:47Jay Shetty?

  Yeah. So beautiful question. My biggest answer is first of all, I empathize with anyone who's been in that situation having. I can't ever say I've been in that situation in the same way, but I've experienced similar things.

• 5:59Lewis Howes?

  You've seen a feeling in your life.

• 6:00Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, in my own way. And I've seen my mom go through stuff like that. I know that my mom worked really hard to raise me and my sister while working, you know, while running around. And I've seen my mom be that incredible powerhouse of a person. And the main thing I would say is what you can do right now is find meaning in what you do. Make what you do meaningful, passionate and purposeful. You don't need to suddenly look to become an entrepreneur or start a side hustle or find some more time, find meaning. And the way you find meaning is you genuinely stop, press pause for a second and go, what am I living for?

• 6:37Jay Shetty?

  Like what am I living for right now? And if you're living for your child and if you're living to provide and put food on the table, that is a beautiful thing that we should celebrate more. And sometimes it takes us a moment to stop and celebrate that. And so I would say find meaning, because you can't always find happiness. You can't always find positivity, but you can always find meaning in that position. So I'll give an example, like I lost someone really important to me, a mentor, a few days back. I can't be positive about that. You can't be happy about that.

• 7:05Lewis Howes?

  You're sad.

• 7:05Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 7:06Lewis Howes?

  It's hurtful.

• 7:06Jay Shetty?

  You feel sad, you feel lost, but guess what? I can find meaning in it, because I can make a list of every lesson he taught me and make a plan to try and live every one of those lessons.

• 7:14Lewis Howes?

  Wow, that's beautiful.

• 7:15Jay Shetty?

  And so if you're in a really tough situation right now, don't look for positivity. Don't look for happiness. Look for meaning.

• 7:22Lewis Howes?

  That's a good one. Not trying to, and not trying to get yourself out of pain too quickly or discomfort or frustration.

• 7:28Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 7:29Lewis Howes?

  Which I've been a guilt to be like, I'll just be positive or whatever to people. But I think it's like, you know, have your experience.

• 7:35Jay Shetty?

  Yes.

• 7:35Lewis Howes?

  Live your experience and find meaning as quickly as possible.

• 7:39Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 7:40Lewis Howes?

  And create a commitment to how you want to use that meaning moving forward.

• 7:44Jay Shetty?

  Love it.

• 7:44Lewis Howes?

  Okay, I may not be great tomorrow, maybe not next week, next month, but I'm going to use this meaning to serve other people, to continue to do what I love, continue to be great to my friends, my family in the best way possible.

• 7:57Jay Shetty?

  And when you start doing those small things with love and kindness, so much more opens up. It's like when you, when you can be trusted with the small things and the small moments, you get trusted with more and more and more. And so like, it helps to just, in that moment, and it's in those painful moments that you realize how powerful you are. We all know that, like you really recognize it. And what you said was beautiful about not rushing through the pain because, and you know, this example's probably been shared before, but if you have a wound and you've cut yourself, it's like you can't rush the healing.

• 8:30Jay Shetty?

  You can't rush it. If you broke your arm, I mean, and you've been through so many bodily injuries, you can't rush the process.

• 8:36Lewis Howes?

  It's gonna take six weeks minimum to heal a broken bone. Yeah, minimum.

• 8:39Jay Shetty?

  And you've got to sit through that.

• 8:41Lewis Howes?

  It's painful.

• 8:41Jay Shetty?

  There's no injections you can take. There's no videos you can watch. There's nothing you can listen to. But our challenge is we try and rush through the pain rather than reflect through the pain.

• 8:50Lewis Howes?

  We try to rush the healing process.

• 8:51Jay Shetty?

  Try to rush the healing and you can't rush healing and healing is meant to be slow because it buys you time. It buys you reflection. It gives you so much space.

• 8:59Lewis Howes?

  To slow down.

• 9:00Jay Shetty?

  To slow down. And that's what your body's calling out for. And this is our emergency, like, how many times have we heard it, where you slow down, you slow down, and that's when you fall ill? Because guess what? Your body has been trying to tell you to slow down. When you feel pain, so I write about it and think like a monk, pain makes you pay attention.

• 9:19Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 9:19Jay Shetty?

  That's what pain's for. Pain's not-

• 9:21Lewis Howes?

  Notice this.

• 9:22Jay Shetty?

  Notice this. Notice me. Look at me. It's like a crying baby craving for attention. When a baby's crying, you don't just go, ah, it's crying. You don't just go, oh, yeah, we'll just put it in another room and forget about it, right? Like, you go to it and you find its needs. Whereas with our pain, when something's painful, we're just like, oh, yeah, I'll just forget about it. I'll escape from it. I'll do something else. You have to go into that pain.

• 9:41Lewis Howes?

  I'll numb the pain.

• 9:41Jay Shetty?

  I'll numb the pain. That's it.

• 9:43Lewis Howes?

  Or whatever.

• 9:44Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, a hundred percent. That's usually our responses. What can I do to numb this?

• 9:48Lewis Howes?

  Work more, have sex more, drink more, drugs more, whatever it is.

• 9:52Jay Shetty?

  Rather than let me actually become alert. And guess what? The pain just gets higher and higher and higher and higher. Because unfortunately, until it really hurts, we don't stop.

• 10:00Lewis Howes?

  Or you need more and more to numb it with.

• 10:03Jay Shetty?

  So true.

• 10:04Lewis Howes?

  And so you go down to extremes of life, right?

• 10:05Jay Shetty?

  So true.

• 10:06Lewis Howes?

  Now, what's been the most painful thing you've had to experience since? Because I know leaving the monkhood was painful for you because this was a mission of yours that you wanted to have for your whole life. And I think you were there for three and a half years. So what's been the most painful thing, I guess, in the last six or seven years since that time that you've had to reflect back on, take notice of, pay attention to, and reevaluate?

• 10:30Jay Shetty?

  That's a great question. I think for me, it was in 2016, I moved out to New York. So just let me paint a picture of 2016. I moved three jobs. I got married. Wow. I moved country. And I just just started a whole new life, like my life just transformed. So we went through all of that with my wife. Yes. In one year. And by the way, all of that was surprises. The job change was surprises. Yeah. The country change was a surprise. The marriage was not a surprise. We planned that. Right, right, right, right. But apart from everything else, everything was a surprise. Now, I said I like surprises, so I can roll with it. But my point is, that's a lot of transition in a year. So much transition. And I felt the burden of being in a new city where we had no family, we had no friends.

• 11:16Jay Shetty?

  And my wife, who loves being around her family, and no one understands just how close she is to them. I felt this burden on me that I had taken away her time with her family. And now she was alone. So I was going out to work. And she'd be crying at home. Hmm. And I was thinking, she's got no friends, she's got no support. And I know you can relate to this with moving and relationships and so much going on. And so it's like, I'm dealing with that. And guess what? Six months later. I have to leave and move on and work on a new career to build everything myself. And then I'm four months away from being broke. And so on top of all of this, I've now got four months away from being broke. I've got enough money money saved for four months to pay for rent and groceries. And that's it. In New York City.

• 11:58Jay Shetty?

  In New York City. And that's it. And guess what? Even on top of that, I've got thirty days before my visa runs out and I'm kicked out of the country. So I can't even live here anymore. So not only have I just got married, moved job three times, changed career again, had to move into a apartment, four months of being broke. And I might get kicked out in thirty days. And my renewal for my visa cost fifteen thousand dollars. Oh. So that's gonna eat into those four months. I have probably never been under that much emotional. Yeah. Physical and and mental pressure in my life. Like genuinely, I felt it. And I felt my body change. My my breath was more stressed. I would be breathing faster. Shorter breaths, not deep breaths, heartbeat faster, not working out. You get into lazy habits. You start craving junk food. Sugar to get the energy.

• 12:43Jay Shetty?

  I'm living in a five hundred square foot apartment with my wife, which is which is tiny. Like everything's in that space. And guess what? We both work from home. So I'm now sitting at a desk, hunched over, trying to figure stuff out. She's trying to cook in the same room. Like I'm trying to just just trying to figure out what to do. And I remember the next morning. Sending like a hundred emails to people and just being like, this is who I am. This is what I can do. How can we serve? And that was the same year that I ended up meeting you later in that year. And the beginning three months of that journey was so stressful. Like they were so stressful because I was like, what if I have to move back to London? What am I gonna say to her parents? I mean, I just took their daughter away like.

• 13:24Lewis Howes?

  Just got married.

• 13:25Jay Shetty?

  I've lived in New York City for six months and my life's falling apart. Like, you know, so much and I've got all these views, but there's nothing, there's nothing happening in. We met.

• 13:32Lewis Howes?

  You also, you also, I mean, at this time, you're also growing so much. How are you able to create and reach this impact with your videos? That's growing while you're under so much stress and uncertainty.

• 13:44Jay Shetty?

  And I stopped a bit at that time, like things slowed down hard, like things slowed down.

• 13:48Lewis Howes?

  I remember.

• 13:49Jay Shetty?

  I, I wasn't creating as much as I was because I don't enjoy creating from stress or pressure. And I don't think you can really create something from stress and pressure. So we really slowed down at that time. And when I was creating, I was creating from a place of recognizing that I could share what I had learned and what I had grown in so far. So anything I was sharing was like, this is what I've learned so far. So that was the biggest pain that I've been through in the last seven years for sure. And all I can say is that I remember coming home to my wife, knowing that this was gonna be the truth. And I came home and I said to her, I said to her, I guarantee you, this is gonna be the best thing that ever happened to us.

• 14:25Lewis Howes?

  What, the pain?

• 14:26Jay Shetty?

  The pain. I said that to the night I came home and then she gave out. I literally came home, I looked in the eyes and go, this is the scenario. And I just want you to know that I guarantee to you, this is the best thing that's ever gonna happen to us. And I said to her, and this is, this is a monk statement that we used to repeat. I said to her, I'm just not gonna judge the moment. Don't judge the moment because what we do is we try to label moments as good or bad. And when you label a moment as bad, it now does not have the opportunity to become good. I'll give an example. If I go, I don't like this book. This book's bad, right? And I don't, and I love this book. But if I say that, guess what? I will never pick it up and recognize the value that's inside of it because you've labeled it.

• 15:03Lewis Howes?

  Yes.

• 15:04Jay Shetty?

  And we label stuff like we label, oh, that restaurant's bad. But when you label a moment, that person's bad. Now you can't learn from that person. Oh, a great one. That's a really good one. As soon as you start labeling people or anything as good or bad, you limit it. You stop it from being something else. And here's the truth. Every moment can evolve into being anything if you give it the opportunity to.

• 15:26Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 15:27Jay Shetty?

  But as soon as you say it's got no value anymore, you lose it. And so for me, I had to say to myself, don't judge the moment. And I'd keep repeating that.

• 15:36Lewis Howes?

  Don't judge where you're at.

• 15:37Jay Shetty?

  Don't judge.

• 15:38Lewis Howes?

  What's happening.

• 15:38Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, don't judge it as negative. Don't, don't just start saying it's negative. Because guess what? We've all been in positions where a gift turned into a curse and a curse turned into a gift.

• 15:46Lewis Howes?

  That's true.

• 15:47Jay Shetty?

  Right?

• 15:47Lewis Howes?

  Where our dreams came true and it ended up not being what we wanted.

• 15:51Jay Shetty?

  Exactly.

• 15:52Lewis Howes?

  It fell apart and it led us into our dreams.

• 15:55Jay Shetty?

  Totally. Why is it that so many people that win the lottery go broke? Gifts can turn into curses too.

• 16:01Lewis Howes?

  That's true.

• 16:01Jay Shetty?

  But because we labeled them as the best moment in our life or the worst moment in our life. Whereas when you approach things to neutrality and just what you have on the table, you can be like, okay, what am I gonna do next?

• 16:10Lewis Howes?

  It's why the greatest quarterbacks are neutral energy. They'll get a little excited. They'll get a little fist pump in there every now and then, but they're not hyped every play and they're not negative every play. They have this calm, they see the field, they're, you drop a pass and it's like a little bit, let's go. But it's very neutral. Even when you score a touchdown, unless it's maybe the Super Bowl or a big championship at the end of a game, in the middle of the game, you wanna keep it pretty like even keel paced. So you can prepare for the best or the worst.

• 16:39Jay Shetty?

  That's great, yeah.

• 16:40Lewis Howes?

  But if you're always up and down, it's like your energy levels will go up and down and you'll be exhausted. You need to have energy in life.

• 16:47Jay Shetty?

  Totally.

• 16:47Lewis Howes?

  And if everything is tied around a story of this is bad, this is wrong, I'm in a bad place, I'm messing up, I'm going broke, that energy is gonna pull you away from service.

• 16:57Jay Shetty?

  Exactly.

• 16:57Lewis Howes?

  Or creation or creativity of how do I get out of this place? So I think it's really powerful.

• 17:02Jay Shetty?

  I love that. And I used to have a coach, and I think a lot of coaches use this, or at least he used to say to us, he would be like, if you, if you lose, cry for a day. And if you celebrate, if you win, celebrate for a day.

• 17:14Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 17:14Jay Shetty?

  And then move on the next day, get back to training. Don't, don't let it run.

• 17:18Lewis Howes?

  Don't live in the past.

• 17:18Jay Shetty?

  Don't live in the past. And what we do is when we lose, we cry for a month. And when we win, we just move on.

• 17:25Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 17:25Jay Shetty?

  Which means that our negative experiences hold us back and weigh us down more than our positive experiences. So we're actually allowing, because we don't immerse ourselves in winning and growth. We only submerge ourselves in negative experiences.

• 17:39Lewis Howes?

  We need to celebrate also. We try to celebrate. I've been, you know, that's been part of my life as well, is like moving on too quick. And now we try to like, let's enjoy, let's go to lunch or dinner and really like appreciate this moment and celebrate this moment. Even have a dinner with some friends and family. Otherwise, why are we working so hard for?

• 17:56Jay Shetty?

  Hundred percent. And we almost feel like we can't, we can't do that because that makes us complacent.

• 18:02Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 18:03Jay Shetty?

  But, but that's my point.

• 18:04Lewis Howes?

  Never good enough.

• 18:05Jay Shetty?

  Exactly. But if you win, celebrate for a day. If you lose, cry for a day, move on. Simple.

• 18:09Lewis Howes?

  And you've learned so many lessons over your years. As a monk, you learned a ton of lessons. Moving to, you know, getting married, moving into a new country, building, building companies, launching products and books. And you've had ups and downs. What's been the biggest lesson in the last 12 months for you? Cause you've learned, you've created so much in the last 12 months. You've done so many things. What's been the biggest lesson for you in your life?

• 18:32Jay Shetty?

  Oh, that's a big question. I think I'd have to say that it's a, and I was saying it to a friend on the phone this morning when I was on the way to you. And I was just, I was just sharing it with him because he was having a moment in recognizing this. There's a wonderful verse in the Manu Smithi, which I talk about in Think Like a Monk. It's a monk book. And in the verse, it says, "When you protect your purpose, your purpose protects you." Now, I wanna, I wanna unpack that. What I mean by that is your purpose is like a rare jewel. And a rare gemstone.

• 19:09Jay Shetty?

  And imagine you were walking around with the most expensive diamond or jewel in the world. How would you protect it?

• 19:16Lewis Howes?

  You wouldn't just like wave it out, yeah?

• 19:18Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, you wouldn't just wear it on your chest?

• 19:19Lewis Howes?

  Like this, holding it.

• 19:21Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 19:21Lewis Howes?

  Putting a pillow around it, a blanket, you'd do like, yeah, protect it.

• 19:24Jay Shetty?

  You'd protect it. And so your purpose is like that, and guess what? People are gonna tell you every day that that jewel is not worth anything. They're gonna tell you that that jewel is actually valueless. It doesn't have any impact on your life. They're gonna try and take away that value. They're gonna tell you that there's another jewel out there that you need to have more value. And what ends up happening is you don't, I love the word, look at the wording, protect your purpose. You have to protect it. So what happens is your success grows, you get more opportunities, more ideas, more things coming your way. Temptations, but they can all take you away from your purpose. Distractions. And to me, I'm repeating this for myself because I'm like, I just wanna stick to what I was born to do.

• 20:09Jay Shetty?

  And I'm so grateful that I get to do it, I'm so happy I get to do it, and I wanna keep protecting it. I don't wanna get lost in the waves. You know, you don't wanna just get chucked in the waves of the ocean and just get lost and just not know where you're going. So for me, when you protect your purpose, your purpose protects you.

• 20:24Lewis Howes?

  So that's been your biggest lesson?

• 20:25Jay Shetty?

  That's my biggest lesson.

• 20:26Lewis Howes?

  Why? Do you feel like your purpose has been maybe distracted in some ways?

• 20:29Jay Shetty?

  I don't think it has, but I'm saying it so it doesn't.

• 20:32Lewis Howes?

  You're reminding yourself.

• 20:33Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, I'm reminding myself, like I'm preaching to myself right now.

• 20:35Lewis Howes?

  Especially being in Hollywood and the temptation of all these opportunities out here.

• 20:38Jay Shetty?

  Totally, and I, and I think for me, it's a bigger lesson, also because it gives me more faith. So I always encourage, and this is actually, actually this is why it's my biggest lesson. I encourage so many people that I coach, so many people that I mentor, obviously everyone in my community and audience and everything, to go and follow that, go and live that purpose. And I see time and time again that when I see people trying to live their purpose, they are protected. That it, things work. When you're playing in your Dharma and your purpose, things work, things move, you feel momentum. They happen. And I'm not saying they happen without effort, but they happen, they move. Whereas when you're not, you just constantly feel like you're grinding up against, you know, a war.

• 21:20Lewis Howes?

  I know, challenges.

• 21:21Jay Shetty?

  Just, just constant.

• 21:22Lewis Howes?

  So what is your purpose and when did you discover it?

• 21:26Jay Shetty?

  Good question. What is my, my purpose is simple. It's always has been since, not since the beginning because I discovered it afterwards. My purpose is making wisdom go viral. And I've stuck with that and I've kept it that way because to me, and there's more to it. Making wisdom go viral through entertainment, I would say is my purpose. Because I believe that that is something that is uniquely my goal, impact and service. And the beautiful thing is I'm not limited to a platform. So that can be books, it can be podcasts, it can be TV shows, it can be movies. It's not limited. And this I learned by reading, I was reading after, and this was after my videos started to, to get seen. This wasn't before I did it. It wasn't like I sat down and I wrote this fancy tagline.

• 22:08Jay Shetty?

  I was reading Saleem Ishmael's book called Exponential Organizations. And in this book, he talks about something called an MTP, a massive transformational purpose. And he says that every major person, organization in the world has an MTP. So an MTP has to be aspirational, it has to be massive, and it has to be service and purpose based. So Google's is organizing the world's information. Notice it doesn't say we're an SEO company. Notice it doesn't say we do Google Ads. They're, they're organizing the world's information. That's how big they're dreaming. And when you're organizing the world's information, you can do driverless cars, you can do Google Glass, you can sell Google Ads, whatever it is.

• 22:50Jay Shetty?

  And so Ted's is ideas worth spreading. That's what they are, that's what they're about. So Jay Shetty is making wisdom go viral. That's what I'm dedicated to.

• 22:57Lewis Howes?

  So when did you discover it? Cause it wasn't when you were ten, it wasn't when you were twenty one in college.

• 23:02Jay Shetty?

  I'd, I'd say I was thirty, probably two, three years ago. So I'm thirty two now. So I'd say like two, three years ago is when I discovered it.

• 23:09Lewis Howes?

  Thirty years old is when you discovered your purpose?

• 23:11Jay Shetty?

  Correct.

• 23:12Lewis Howes?

  So what was your purpose before that?

• 23:14Jay Shetty?

  My purpose before that was finding my purpose. Like, it's like that process of just like, my purpose before that was fourteen years. So I've been online for four years. I've spent ten years offline, talking about the same stuff, sharing the same messages in talks, in universities, in small seminars, in coaching, in mentoring. Like, I've been doing the same thing for fourteen years. But I didn't realize it was my purpose until very recently. But I just did what I enjoyed and naturally tried to get better at it.

• 23:43Lewis Howes?

  So if we don't know what our purpose is and we're working towards finding our purpose, it's okay?

• 23:49Jay Shetty?

  That's actually where you're gonna spend most of your life.

• 23:52Lewis Howes?

  Discovering what your purpose is.

• 23:53Jay Shetty?

  Totally, and that's the best bit.

• 23:55Lewis Howes?

  Cause I think a lot of people are like, well, I don't know what my purpose is.

• 23:57Jay Shetty?

  Totally, there's so much pressure.

• 23:59Lewis Howes?

  How do I find it?

• 24:00Jay Shetty?

  The pressure of finding your purpose will stop you from finding your purpose. Literally, the pressure is so heavy. And that's why it's not about finding that, it's just starting with the basics. What am I good at? And I talk about it, and I break down Dharma in here, and I talk about what are your passion? What is your expertise? What is your compassion? Because that's really important. What is your compassion for the world? Like, what problem do you wanna solve? I often, people will say, there's so many things I could do, there's so many things. I'm like, my question is not what causes you the greatest joy. Sometimes my question is, what is, what causes you the greatest pain?

• 24:32Lewis Howes?

  Make that your purpose.

• 24:33Jay Shetty?

  Make that your purpose. If you don't know what your joy is, you definitely know what your pain is.

• 24:36Lewis Howes?

  What do you not like in the world?

• 24:37Jay Shetty?

  What do you not like? And so for me.

• 24:39Lewis Howes?

  Go serve that thing.

• 24:40Jay Shetty?

  Hundred percent. So for me, the greatest pain I see in the world is people not reaching their potential. That is, that causes me more pain. Because I believe that there is someone out there who is stacking shelves, who has the cure to cancer. There is someone out there.

• 24:55Lewis Howes?

  Or is a talented singer.

• 24:56Jay Shetty?

  Is a talented singer. There is someone out there who's not living to their potential. And I think we're better people, we're better partners, and we're better parents when we live to our potential. So that's what I'm trying to solve. And I'm not saying that's the biggest thing, I'm saying it's my thing.

• 25:09Lewis Howes?

  Whenever I work with people, I'm always telling them to find your purpose, focus on what you're most passionate about, or what you, you have the most pain around.

• 25:15Jay Shetty?

  There you go.

• 25:16Lewis Howes?

  It's the same thing.

• 25:17Jay Shetty?

  There you go.

• 25:17Lewis Howes?

  Do the thing you love the most, and keep doing it until you either discover that's it, or maybe I don't love that anymore. Like, I played so many sports growing up. I used to love baseball, used to love soccer, and then I got bored with it. I got burnt out by it. It wasn't a love of mine anymore, it wasn't a passion. And then I switched to football. And it was like, oh, this is a passion. And I'm actually more gifted physically for this sport than I would be for soccer. I was too big for soccer. Couldn't run seven miles a day right now on the field. But I think you need to try lots of things, and you might think it's a passion, but you might get burnt out and discover, eh, I don't love it anymore. What else is there? And keep trying new things, like you said, eight new things a month.

• 25:57Jay Shetty?

  Yeah.

• 25:57Lewis Howes?

  Till you discover.

• 25:58Jay Shetty?

  Till you discover it.

• 25:59Lewis Howes?

  And it might take you thirty, forty, fifty, right?

• 26:02Jay Shetty?

  It doesn't, and that doesn't matter. Like, it doesn't matter, like, the fun is in the growth and the journey and the... Like, for me, the last ten years before this happened. And my life changes like those were fun. I was happy.

• 26:14Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 26:14Jay Shetty?

  I wasn't unhappy because of that, because I didn't have.

• 26:17Lewis Howes?

  You didn't know the exact purpose of your life.

• 26:18Jay Shetty?

  Yeah, exactly. And now I'm very clear on it. And I'm happy for it to evolve too. Like, I don't think it has to stay the same. I may sit with you in two years' time and tell you something completely different.

• 26:29Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 26:29Jay Shetty?

  And I'm okay with that. But I can only work with what I have now. And I think we start trying to postpone our purpose or find a date by which you have to. You put a deadline on your purpose? Doesn't make any sense. Like, if you really care about it, how can you put a deadline on it?

• 26:44Lewis Howes?

  I know.

• 26:45Jay Shetty?

  You just keep working towards it.

• 26:48Lewis Howes?

  In this section, motivational speaker and bestselling author Lisa Nichols talks about how to not let fear get in the way of your purpose. I'm a big believer in attacking your fears head on because they can truly hold you back in life. Which one is more valuable if you could only choose one? Negative thoughts but positive words?

• 27:09Lewis Howes?

  Positive thoughts but negative words? Or do they both need to be in alignment towards your mission and purpose?

• 27:14Lisa Nichols?

  Well, um, so I'll start with this. Your life is a physical manifestation of the conversation going on in your head. I'm gonna start with that.

• 27:26Lewis Howes?

  Can we just speak for like 24 hours on this? I love this.

• 27:29Lisa Nichols?

  Right. Your life is a physical manifestation of the conversation going on in your head. So if you said nothing but thought everything, your life is gonna show up to make your thoughts true. So you have one job. You have one job in your life for you. To make what you think about life true, so that you're not wrong. You don't wanna walk around wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong. You wanna be right about the life you see. So you're going to work hard, work hard, to produce the life that you talk about in your mind. Whether that life is no one loves me.

• 27:59Lewis Howes?

  Mm-hmm.

• 28:00Lisa Nichols?

  I'm all alone. You can be in a group of people and you will think, I'm so alone. And and and you will feel alone and things will show up to cosign your loneliness just because you're looking for that. And so, um, if you start with, I'm gonna say the mind, like the mind is that thing. The mind is the core engine. It starts all things. It shuts all things down. When I start thinking something different, I'm like, hold on, stop. I wanna think something, I shut down that behavior. I shut down that outcome. When I birth something, I birth it in my mind. I focus on my mind. I see myself there in my mind. Before I got on with you, I was doing guided visualizations. I'm recording them. So people, and I, and I mean, they're juicy. And I'm saying, see yourself here.

• 28:46Lisa Nichols?

  Because if you can see it, and then the, the, the key is evoke the emotion as if you were there.

• 28:54Lewis Howes?

  Yup.

• 28:55Lisa Nichols?

  Right? And that's why people are, who are sad all the time are sad because they're thinking of things that make them sad. And then the emotion follows the thought. So I'm gonna say, everything starts with your thought, Louis. But let me just say this. When you speak, you speak your future into the world. You speak your future, whatever you say, whatever falls off your tongue. When, when you say, I am, right? The unconscious mind says, and you are so. Whatever comes on the other side of that. And so you, you, you asked me a hard question. Which one is most important? It starts with the thought. I think the thought is that, that's where everything originates.

• 29:37Lisa Nichols?

  And then you add a whole lot of turbo boost to it with your tongue.

• 29:41Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 29:41Lisa Nichols?

  When you align the two, and then you add to it, like the B12, the B12 of action. Action is like, action is like, that's the nitro, that's the nitro. Like, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, right? And I see so many people, they think it, they write it, they journal it, they talk about it, and they do no action. And I go, you understand that the action is, that, that's like, that's like putting the, the flower in the sun because it requires sun. And so, yeah.

• 30:11Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, I had, this is a beautiful explanation. And I had a Navy SEAL on, uh, six, seven months ago. His name's Chad, and he... He talked about as a seal, uh, he, he used the tongue as a rudder in a boat. He said, what you speak is going to lead you down, you know, the ocean or the river or wherever on the boat you're on. And so he never says anything negative out loud because it's so powerful in the Navy SEALs. He talked about how powerful it is, no matter how much pain they're experiencing in hell week and all this stuff they're dealing with. They never allow the tongue to speak something negative, otherwise they'll ultimately quit and give up.

• 30:50Lisa Nichols?

  Right, right, right, right, right.

• 30:51Lewis Howes?

  It's too painful to deal with what they deal with.

• 30:54Lisa Nichols?

  Right.

• 30:54Lewis Howes?

  To then say, ah, I'm hurting, I'm tired, ah, I can't do it.

• 30:59Lisa Nichols?

  Right, right. Don't, don't, don't speak that. Don't speak that into the, you just, because whatever you speak, feels like it expands.

• 31:05Lewis Howes?

  Of course.

• 31:05Lisa Nichols?

  Right. Energy grows where energy goes. It expands. So speak life, speak possibility. There is not one dark situation that doesn't have a glimmer of light. It doesn't mean it's going to be convenient to see.

• 31:18Lewis Howes?

  That's true.

• 31:19Lisa Nichols?

  And most of us are looking for convenient light.

• 31:21Lewis Howes?

  Yes. Oh, man, I want to speak for like five more hours with you, but I, I want to, I want to try to finish with a few final questions here.

• 31:28Lisa Nichols?

  Yes.

• 31:29Lewis Howes?

  Um, even though I don't want to finish this, we'll have to come back on. Yeah, we'll bring it back on.

• 31:34Lisa Nichols?

  Again, I promise it won't be as, as challenging to get me in the future. I promise, my friend.

• 31:40Lewis Howes?

  I, I want to talk about, uh, for a moment, purpose, because I feel like right now we're seeing a lot of people with scattered purposes, especially with everything that's happening in the world over the last three months, six months. I'm seeing so many big influencers go through divorce who were publicly had great relationships. I'm seeing people's businesses go under because of, they were in the events business or whatever, and they weren't able to adapt and shift. I'm seeing, uh, people scattered with their purpose and unclear.

• 32:11Lisa Nichols?

  Right.

• 32:12Lewis Howes?

  How can people? Let's speak to this because I think it's two different questions. One is how to truly figure out what your purpose is because I think it's seasonal. You know what your purpose was when you were 10 is different now.

• 32:24Lisa Nichols?

  I agree.

• 32:25Lewis Howes?

  It's seasonal, so it's hard for, it's a very broad question and I don't want to set you up with that. Uh, because I think it's unfair when people ask you that for me. But if you know, you think I know what my purpose is. Like I know I'm meant to go do this thing. I thi- I think I'm supposed to go after this. I feel like maybe I should try this thing, but I'm afraid. How do you, how would you coach someone who knows what they're supposed to do? Or at least they think they do until they figure it out and it's not it or it is it? How do you coach people or encourage people to actually do it? To actually overcome that final hurdle of fear? Whether they're afraid of failure, afraid of success, afraid of judgment? Whether they've got a really good life and a really good job, but it's just not there.

• 33:08Lewis Howes?

  It's not pulling them to their ultimate purpose. Where do you, where do you share in that line?

• 33:14Lisa Nichols?

  So, um, one of the first things I do is I ask them to please let's quantify and give life to what does it cost you to stay still? So, you know, I'm a, I'm a, I'm a straight no chaser kind of girl, right? I'm a, I'm a, I'm a, I'm, we're not just going towards something. We also have to realize that to the same degree that you asked the weight loss. Uh, why did I do it? I, because what would it cost me with all my success? What would it have cost me to stay in that 220 pound body? What's the cost? And so when I saw that, that's why I responded. I, if I, if I didn't give myself this, right? I was very clear with the cost.

• 33:57Lisa Nichols?

  So number one, I, I would say, what does it cost you? And I, and my students know me, I do this in my, in my workshop, my trainings for my, my, my platinum level students and my coaches and students that are getting certified to be a Lisa Nichols, uh, trainer. And I, I ask them hard questions. What does it cost you to stay in that mindset? And they have to list it. And I say, and what part of the price have you already paid? And they just get visceral, they're like, ah. And I say, so how long? I don't know, whatever you want, how much longer do you want to pay that price?

• 34:30Lewis Howes?

  Right. Two years, 10 years, two months?

• 34:33Lisa Nichols?

  Are, are we P I F? Are we paid in full now?

• 34:38Lisa Nichols?

  Are we P I F?

• 34:39Lewis Howes?

  I paid it full and I'm keep paying.

• 34:41Lisa Nichols?

  Exactly, and so I use this metaphor that if you went to the store and bought a dozen eggs and you went home and you scrambled all the eggs and you cooked the eggs and then you took the empty carton back to the grocery store and you said, "I'd like to buy these again." The cashier will go, "But you already bought them. Why are you buying it? Why are you paying for it again?" That's what we're doing. We're paying for the same behavior over and over again. And so, one, get clear that you're P I F, that you're paid in full for not being in action. Like, I've already paid it. I've been three years of wanting a dream and not have, whatever your reasons are, right? Number two is, let's talk about everything that happens if you fail. Let's just unpack that.

• 35:22Lewis Howes?

  You go back to where you're at now. Yeah.

• 35:24Lisa Nichols?

  Right. Actually, you never are back to where you are now because now you've got some kind of lesson that you didn't have.

• 35:30Lewis Howes?

  Experience, yeah.

• 35:30Lisa Nichols?

  Right, you've got some kind of experience. So, what happens if you fail? Okay, great. So what lessons can we pull out of that? So now, let's agree to if we fail, let's fail forward. So then, let's define what does failing forward look like? So then, we get very descriptive on what does failing forward look like? What will I do with the lessons? What will I, I'll document four to six things I did right. And I'll document two to three things that I can improve upon and I'll implement them all on the next go-round. So then, we take out all the possibility. And I even go as far as saying, "So what if people judge you?" I unpack it. What if people judge you? Let's say they, like, they talk really bad about you on social media for like, uh, three

• 36:13Lisa Nichols?

  days. Like, it goes a while. Well, then what happens? Well, on the sixth day, I get up and do it again. So all of a sudden, I take all the, all the juice out of the, out of the, out of the balloon of, we just deep dive into the darkness of your illusions. Deep dive into the darkness of your mind. So like, what? Okay, well, I'll lose this money. Okay, you lost how much? Forty thousand. Okay, all forty thousand gone. So now what?

• 36:38Lisa Nichols?

  I don't know. Okay, well, let's, let's, let's figure out a plan because you already lost the money. We lost the money. Let's, let's, now I can start saving again, or I can do whatever. Okay, great. So then every, all these big possibilities are now just situations. Then I go to, so what can we do to eliminate the possibility of that occurring? So now we go into strategy. So I'm real big on strategy. I'm real big on milestones. I believe that you should not set a macro goal without setting several micro goals. So I live in micro goals, like my number that I want to generate this year. I don't ever look at that after, after November of the year prior. After November twenty nineteen, I don't really look at it. I look at every monthly goal because that's my milestone.

• 37:22Lisa Nichols?

  I know that goal and I know that goal is tied into my annual goal. So I don't worry about it. So I'm seeing if I'm on track, all track, on track, because I can handle that. That's palatable, right? So then a lot of times entrepreneurs set like, like big bodacious goal. And you have a release of endorphins when you first set it, but then it goes away. Because you don't even know how you're gonna get there.

• 37:43Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 37:43Lisa Nichols?

  And so I'm real big on my, like just on my campus, I, I'm real big on three things. A strategy, right? Milestones and accountability. Buy when dates, buy when, buy who, right? And so make it doable, make it so you could see it, set it up in ninety days. And so, uh, I, I, I, I think that purpose comes with a plan.

• 38:06Lewis Howes?

  Oh.

• 38:07Lisa Nichols?

  And oftentimes we live, we leave, leave purpose so big and so ambiguous that it feels difficult to touch. And so if you're supposed to inspire millions, okay, great. So for August, how many are you gonna touch toward that million? We're gonna get to millions. We're gonna get to millions. But are we touching five thousand? Are we touching fifty thousand? And then by November, did you grow your social media platform by three percent or by thirty percent? Like less something trackable and measurable so that you can see that purpose being fulfilled? So you can trust your picker. So many of us haven't had enough indicators, haven't had enough uh evidence

• 38:49Lisa Nichols?

  that we've done it the way we thought we would do it or better, that now you're starting to pull back on trusting your picker. Well, you need evidence. If the court of law sends a man to prison because of evidence or lets a woman walk because of lack of evidence, then why not use evidence in your life that you're ready for such a time as this? But you have to set it up in such a way where you can see the trackable evidence.

• 39:16Lewis Howes?

  What do we say to ourselves when we don't do self-care? What are we saying about how much we are worth to ourselves when we don't, when we delay that for months and years of taking care of ourselves?

• 39:30Lisa Nichols?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Um, I'm not important enough to put at the front of my own line. You always are gonna have a line of people to serve, things to do, and you got one job to stand at the front of your own line. Um, you're, you're saying that I, you're training other people how to treat you by the way you treat yourself.

• 39:52Lewis Howes?

  Mm-hmm.

• 39:53Lisa Nichols?

  And so you are saying, um, you're saying that I, I still need to heal in the area of feeling important enough to prioritize my self-care.

• 40:06Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 40:07Lisa Nichols?

  Um, you also may be saying and can be saying, uh, I still need to learn how to fall in love with myself.

• 40:14Lewis Howes?

  Hmm.

• 40:14Lisa Nichols?

  Enough to take care of me the way I take care of others. And that's so many people. You take care of those around you far better than you take care of yourself.

• 40:25Lewis Howes?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 40:28Lewis Howes?

  In this section, visionary and yogi Sadhguru shares where suffering comes from in most people's lives, what we can do about it, and how we can maximize the opportunity that we have while being alive. I love the fact that you are a symbol of childlike energy in the world, fun, play, and...

• 40:49Speaker 03

  Why aren't adults fun? What happened to them?

• 40:53Lewis Howes?

  Exactly. I love that. Adults, as you know, get caught up in a lot of things that aren't their true nature. And why is that? Why is that, do you think, that we forget how to play and think like a child when we grow up?

• 41:09Speaker 03

  See, people have forgotten that in this vast cosmos, where we don't know where is the beginning, where is the end, in the middle of nowhere, on a tiny little mudball called Earth, you and me are sitting long distance and talking right now, okay? So, and for the kind of creatures we are, we are not even a speck of dust in this universe. But we have an individual experience. This is the magnanimity of creation, that it's given as an individual experience, though we are nothing. Tomorrow, if the whole humanity evaporates, nobody will miss us in this cosmos, that's how small we are.

• 41:53Speaker 03

  But we have an individual experience. So this individual experience, human beings have taken it rather too seriously, as if they are the beginning and end of the world.

• 42:04Lewis Howes?

  The center of the world, yeah.

• 42:05Speaker 03

  Yes, they thought they are the center of the universe. So this misunderstanding makes them believe as they grow up, or as they degenerate, I would say. They don't really grow up. Because at the age of five, if you're so joyful and energetic, by the time you're thirty, you should be ecstatic and bursting. But if the reverse has happened, this is degeneration of life. So this degeneration happens because people take their individual existence rather too seriously. They don't understand, before you and me came here, countless number of people who thought they were smart, and they were strong, and they were beautiful, and they were wonderful, they are all topsoil now.

• 42:48Speaker 03

  Countless number of people, and you and me also will be, one day, unless our friends to, our friends choose to bury us, really deep fearing that we may raise from the dead or something. So, we have taken our individual existence too seriously. Because of this, life has taken a backseat. Our physical structure has taken front seat, our psychological structures have, you know, gone to the stratosphere, but the life that we are is somewhere, which is not even in most people's experience. So, this is the whole problem. When you are a child, you are just a piece of life. Slowly, you took your personality so seriously, you took your boundaries of your form so

• 43:32Speaker 03

  seriously, that you think this is it. So, till death knocks on their door, they don't realize that this is not it.

• 43:40Lewis Howes?

  People talk about suffering a lot. When I went to India to study meditation for my brief time on my beginner mind of meditation, I was told that suffering is the obsessive self-centric thinking that we have about ourselves, the obsessive self-centric thinking, and when we focus on ourselves, then we suffer. I don't know how accurate that is in your, in your mind or your, or in your practice and philosophy, but what, what is suffering and why do we have it so much?

• 44:14Speaker 03

  See, there are two faculties in a human being, which are unique to human beings only. No other creatures have these faculties. This is a very vivid sense of memory and a fantastic sense of imagination.

• 44:32Lewis Howes?

  Hmm hmm.

• 44:34Speaker 03

  So, what is it that human beings are suffering? Just check out with any suffering human being, they are suffering what happened five years ago, ten years ago, or they are suffering what may happen day after tomorrow already. So essentially, they are suffering their memory and their imagination. Rarely they are in life. They are just suffering these two fantastic faculties which make us human. Our life is rich only because our memory is so vivid. Otherwise, we would also be like an earthworm. Essentially, what they are complaining is, they are complaining, why did nature evolve us into this fantastic place of being human being? We would have been happy being earthworms because our only intention is to be eco-friendly right now.

• 45:19Speaker 03

  Earthworms are very eco-friendly, they are very peaceful. But, the possibility is only that much. With the possibility, human being is a tremendous possibility. If you do not know how to harness this possibility, every possibility will become a problem. That’s all that’s happened. If you do not harness your faculties the way you should, then it becomes a problem. How come this has happened to us? Charles Darwin said something like this, I am simplifying it, oversimplifying it, but something like this. A goat could have become a giraffe over a million year time. A pig could have become an elephant over many more million years. But a monkey became a man rather too quickly.

• 46:03Speaker 03

  So quickly, that anthropologists are looking for a missing link which they have not found. Actual difference, the DNA difference between a chimpanzee and a human being is only 1.23%. 1.23% is not too much of a difference, isn’t it? So physiologically, physiologically, that’s how close we are to a chimpanzee. But in terms of our intelligence and awareness, we are worlds apart from a chimpanzee. So right now, what human beings are suffering is their own intelligence. You remove half their brain, they will be very peaceful. No meditation will be needed for them. They will simply sit.

• 46:49Speaker 03

  Peacefully.

• 46:50Lewis Howes?

  And just be, yeah, exactly.

• 46:51Speaker 03

  Yes, just be, because that's what the whole American spirituality is just talking about, just be, just be. If you remove half the brain, you'll just be. That's what a whole lot of people are trying to do by soaking their brains in alcohol, maybe they're preserving it for some other place, or drugging themselves out. They're just being, all right? That is not the way to explore human possibility. If human possibility has to be explored, all our faculties must be full on, and we must see how to further enhance them, because the profoundness of experience comes to you only with sharpness of perception. You cannot dull your perception and think you're having a profound experience.

• 47:36Lewis Howes?

  So how do we...

• 47:37Speaker 03

  Right now...

• 47:38Lewis Howes?

  Sorry, go ahead.

• 47:39Speaker 03

  Please, please tell me.

• 47:41Lewis Howes?

  You know, so how do we maximize or expand our perception?

• 47:45Speaker 03

  See, it's like this. Because as human beings, we knew that only enhancement of our perception, our life will become better, we wanted to see what is up there. Our eyes could not see, so we made a telescope. We want to see the virus, so we made a microscope. We want to hear what is happening somewhere else, so we made a telephone, we made a microphone, see you and me talking, literally 12 hours across the planet, all right? Why all these technologies we made? We want to enhance our perception, isn't it?

• 48:23Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 48:24Speaker 03

  So, right now, this is a bunch of youth, you know, all, all these youth events, below 25 events, I get invited because they think I'm 25.

• 48:34Lewis Howes?

  You have, you have the my, you have the curiosity of a child, that's why they bring you.

• 48:39Speaker 03

  So, they were asking me, "Sadhguru, you have so much influence in the government, why can't you make marijuana legal for us?"

• 48:49Speaker 03

  So, this is over ten, fifteen thousand people in Bangalore city. And it's an open-air thing, I can smell the smoke.

• 48:57Lewis Howes?

  (laughing)

• 48:58Speaker 03

  They all gathered and they sang, "Why don't you make it legal for us?" I said, "Why this marijuana? We will make cocaine also legal, meth also legal, whatever else you name it, I will make all that legal for you." But why do you wanted this to be legal? Because you want to smoke dope and go to the university, isn't it? Yes, they said, "Why not? We are fine with that." I said, "See, we'll do one thing. I'll get you a small plane." And the pilot comes, really smoked up. Do you want to fly with him? Uh, like this.

• 49:35Lewis Howes?

  (laughing)

• 49:37Speaker 03

  Then I said, "You're not getting it. You need a major surgery." The surgeon comes, really smoked up. "You want the surgery?" They said, "No." So you understand, by smoking these things or drinking these things, whatever, your faculties go down. Load faculties will mean less efficiency of life, not only in terms of work, in terms of experience also. It means less life. So, you want to be high, but you are going low and you're thinking you're high. If you want to be high, you come to me, I will show you how to tune up all your faculties to such a level that you will be bright and alert all the time?

• 50:20Speaker 03

  Joyful, blissful, ecstatic, look at my eyes, I am always stoned, without any substance (laughing).

• 50:27Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 50:28Speaker 03

  Because this is the most complex and sophisticated chemical factory on the planet. The question is only, are you a great CEO or a lousy CEO? That's all determines the nature of your experience. So, I don't want to give a philosophical explanation to human suffering. Human suffering is essentially that they have an intelligence for which they don't have a stable enough platform. So, they don't know how to handle their own intelligence. You can call it tension, stress, anxiety, misery, whatever. Essentially, your intelligence has turned against you, that is all it is.

• 51:04Lewis Howes?

  Hmm. When we have emotions, thoughts, feelings, emotions of anger, resentment from something that happened in the past.

• 51:15Lewis Howes?

  Upset that we see on social media, frustrations in the world. Where should we be redirecting these thoughts, feelings and emotions? Should we be feeling them and allowing ourselves to go with anger until it stops? Should we be guarding our thoughts with the reverse of that? What's your ideas on thoughts and feeling and emotions?

• 51:42Speaker 03

  You must punch a window pane or a wall better. A stone wall is good.

• 51:47Lewis Howes?

  (Laughs) You'll feel it, boy. Yeah, exactly.

• 51:50Speaker 03

  (Laughs) Because that is the model that the Hollywood and the television shows, everything is setting up. When you get angry, you break something, all right?

• 52:00Lewis Howes?

  Exactly.

• 52:02Speaker 03

  So, see, first of all, people are assuming that anger is happening to them or misery is happening to them. No, this is exactly what I said earlier, maybe I didn't articulate it fully. No, you are creating anger, you're creating misery, you're creating joy, you're creating whatever. All this is happening from within you. Is it true all human experience is happening from within us?

• 52:27Lewis Howes?

  It's, it's, yeah, because we perceive something and then we...

• 52:33Speaker 03

  No, no, something else, something else may stimulate. But human experience is happening from within us, isn't it?

• 52:40Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 52:40Speaker 03

  Whether it's love or hate or anger or misery or joy or anything is only happening from within us. The simple question I am asking is, what happens from within you? Should you ha- should it happen your way or somebody else's way?

• 52:56Lewis Howes?

  It should happen your way.

• 52:58Speaker 03

  Of course, because the world will never happen your way 100%. Because there are so many stakeholders in the world. Little bit will happen my way, little bit your way, that is fine. But what happens within me must happen my way. If what happens within me does not happen my way, this is the worst form of slavery, isn't it?

• 53:18Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 53:20Speaker 03

  Somebody decides what happens within me. Somebody decides where I should sit. This is slavery, everybody understands this. Now, somebody decides whether I am happy or unhappy. Isn't this the worst form of slavery?

• 53:32Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 53:34Speaker 03

  So this is the liberation that humanity needs to work at. This is what inner engineering means. Inner engineering is not some mechanical process. Because engineering means this essentially. You will say something is well engineered only if it works the way you want, isn't it?

• 53:53Lewis Howes?

  Hmm hmm.

• 53:54Speaker 03

  If this one doesn't work the way you want, what the hell are you expecting other things to work the way you want? It's just an accident. When you live accidentally, anxiety is normal.

• 54:06Lewis Howes?

  Yes, it's every day. But when you're living on purpose and intentionally and mindfully, you should be able to shift out of that.

• 54:13Speaker 03

  No, no, no, no, I wouldn't use those words.

• 54:15Lewis Howes?

  Okay, what words would you use?

• 54:17Speaker 03

  When you say purpose, intention, mindful. See, this is the whole problem with people. Their mind is full all the time.

• 54:27Lewis Howes?

  Right.

• 54:28Speaker 03

  My mind is just empty all the time. Nothing happening, nothing. That's why I wear a turban just to make it substantial.

• 54:36Lewis Howes?

  (Laughs)

• 54:41Speaker 03

  There's nothing in my head. If I'm walking there, I'm just walking, nothing happens. Because, see, right now, your hands are there. Suppose your one hand starts jumping like this.

• 54:53Lewis Howes?

  Uh huh.

• 54:54Speaker 03

  Or if, let's say, my hand starts jumping like this. What will you think? You think Sadhguru has some kind of ailment, isn't it?

• 55:00Lewis Howes?

  I just, that's the, that's the way intelligent people do things, you know?

• 55:06Speaker 03

  (Laughs) No, no, suppose my hand starts jumping like that, you will think, there is some ailment, isn't it? You will think I'm, maybe Mr. Parkinson's is visiting me or something like that.

• 55:18Lewis Howes?

  Sure.

• 55:20Speaker 03

  So, your mind is jumping all the, all over the place. Why is that not ailment, I'm asking? Your only comfort is other people cannot see it, isn't it?

• 55:29Lewis Howes?

  Hmm, tch, yeah, I guess they see it through the manifestation of you being anxious or tense or stressed or angry or...

• 55:36Speaker 03

  Now, whether they see it or not, they see it or not, if any part of you is simply jumping without purpose, is that an ailment, I'm asking?

• 55:47Lewis Howes?

  If any part of you is jumping without purpose, is it an ailment?

• 55:52Lewis Howes?

  Well, I think in your Inner Engineering course, you talk about how we have certain faculties that we can't control, like going to the bathroom and doing certain things that are part of our body.

• 56:02Speaker 03

  Yeah, but...

• 56:03Lewis Howes?

  I don't know if that's a trick question.

• 56:05Speaker 03

  No, no, the pee is just filling up in the bladder. It's not jumping all over the place.

• 56:10Lewis Howes?

  Got you, got you.

• 56:11Speaker 03

  If it jumps all over the place, that is an ailment.

• 56:14Lewis Howes?

  That's an ailment, yes, correct.

• 56:17Speaker 03

  Right now, suppose, let me take a worse example. Suppose your hand starts beating you in the face.

• 56:23Lewis Howes?

  That's an ailment, yes.

• 56:25Speaker 03

  Well, sure. So, right now, your thoughts and emotions are beating you up from inside. Why is that not an ailment, I am saying?

• 56:32Lewis Howes?

  No, it is.

• 56:35Speaker 03

  So, let us not think anger happens to us, resentment happens to us. No, these things we are creating. We have the power to emote. We can make it love, we can make it joy, we can make it ecstasy. But people have chosen to make it tension, anger, resentment, hatred. They have turned it that way. Now, they will claim this is because life has been unfair to me. Life has not been fair to anybody.

• 57:03Speaker 03

  Especially not me.

• 57:07Speaker 03

  Life is not fair to anybody. Life is simply rolling. It's for you to learn to ride it. Sometimes we are in uncomfortable situations. Sometimes we are in comfortable situations. Sometimes we are in situations where we know exactly what to do. And sometimes we are in situations where we don't know what to do. Sometimes somebody else is controlling the situation. Sometimes you are controlling the situation. This is how life is. If you are constantly stepping into unfamiliar situations in your life, that means you are growing at a rapid pace. If you are constantly in comfortable situations, that means you are a stagnant life.

• 57:46Speaker 03

  So if you, if you look for comfort, if you look for a comfort zone, because the moment your thoughts and emotions are going to torment you with external stimulant, external stimulation that happens, what will you choose? You will choose a comfort zone. This means you will limit your life. So the moment somebody can cause you pain or suffering, this means unknowingly you will make the very scope of your life very limited. Only when a person loses this fear of suffering, that no matter what happens, this is how I will be. If this assurance comes to you, then you walk full stride. Because whatever happens in the life around you,

• 58:29Speaker 03

  it will not really make you suffer. Once you are free from suffering, only when you are free from suffering, when you are free from the fear of suffering, that is when you will explore your life in full depth and dimension.

• 58:43Lewis Howes?

  How do we rid ourselves of the fear of suffering then?

• 58:49Speaker 03

  See, as I told you, the suffering is happening because your faculties are not held in your hands. If I have to go to this in little detail, I will have to take a few minutes. See, for example, if I ask you a simple question, do you want your intellect to be sharp or blunt? What is your choice?

• 59:09Lewis Howes?

  Sharp.

• 59:10Speaker 03

  Sharp, of course. So you understand, your intellect is, the better it, the sharper it is, the better it is. It's like a knife. So if it's like a knife, it's a cutting instrument. So if you give anything to your intellect, it will dissect everything and see. This is the nature of our intellect. You don't have to physically dissect, but it dissects everything and sees, what is this, what is that? This is the nature of the intellect. Without dissection, it doesn't know because it is a knife. It's like a scalpel. It must be sharp. A knife that is not sharp is no good knife, isn't it?

• 59:45Lewis Howes?

  Right. It's good for, good for butter.

• 59:48Speaker 03

  Yeah. That also depends. If it just comes out of the refrigerator, even that it won't cut.

• 59:56Speaker 03

  So if, if you are using a knife to do everything...

• 1:00:04Speaker 03

  To do everything, let's say you eat with a knife, you brush with your knife and you do everything with your knife, of course you will be bleeding.

• 1:00:12Lewis Howes?

  Hmm hmm.

• 1:00:13Speaker 03

  That's all that's happening. Only one dimension of intelligence within us. In yogic way of looking at things, we look at mind as 16 parts.

• 1:00:22Lewis Howes?

  Hmm.

• 1:00:23Speaker 03

  This intellect is just one part. Because our education systems are such, which are totally intellect oriented, human beings largely are using only one dimension of their intellect to do everything. You use a knife to stitch your clothes, what will you wear? Only tatters. See, that's what you're seeing in Los Angeles right now. Half the people are wearing tattered clothes. Maybe they used a knife to stitch their jeans.

• 1:00:47Lewis Howes?

  Hmm, exactly. With holes in them, yes.

• 1:00:50Speaker 03

  (Laughs) So if you use a knife to stitch, that's what will happen, all tatters. Right now, human life is in tatters mainly because of this. Instead of using a needle, you're using a knife. So intellect is a very good instrument of survival. If you want to survive on this planet, you need a sharp intellect. The sharper it is, the better you will survive.

• 1:01:17Lewis Howes?

  In this section, bestselling author and actress Priyanka Chopra shares why it's so important for you to believe in yourself and the different ways she's learned to build confidence and overcome insecurities throughout her life. What is the self-talk you do internally? If you don't have a mirror, if you're not alone in a bathroom, what's your process that you say to yourself? What are the reminders? What are the mantras, meditations that you think about before that?

• 1:01:45Speaker 04

  It always helps me to voice it. Whenever I'm insecure, I either I'll write about it somewhere or I'll speak to somebody who I trust. My mom, my husband, my best friend. Um, but I find it easier to talk about it. So that's why I have a healthier relationship with my insecurities. Because I take away their power by discussing them. Um, I choose not to live with them alone in the dark recesses of my mind. Because then they become monsters. And then they become really, really large and um, and they're usually not real.

• 1:02:27Speaker 04

  So it's always been very helpful to me whenever I'm feeling crazy or insecure or afraid, or even if I feel like I've made a mistake.

• 1:02:35Lewis Howes?

  I love everything you're saying, and I'm just a big believer that if people really listen to this and understand, take it in what you're sharing, that it's hard to achieve anything without confidence. You could have the greatest experience, you could have the greatest degree, the skills, you could have the family, you could have the money, like you could have good looks, whatever it is, you could have the stuff. But if you don't know how to build confidence when it matters, it doesn't matter if the world believes in you, if we don't believe in ourselves, nothing's gonna happen.

• 1:03:05Speaker 04

  The world won't believe in you if you don't believe in you. And I, I think like as, as someone in the public profession, you know, my job is to be entertaining and be confident in, in every step that I take and in every move that I make. But I think recognizing that confidence is not something we are born with. It's, it's a skill. It's like, you know, it's a muscle almost. If you think of it like going to the gym and, you know, to, to have muscles and to be in shape, you gotta work at it, just like the vocal cords. People, the greatest musicians in the world, they use, you know, their, their vocal cords.

• 1:03:46Speaker 04

  They do riaz, like we call it in Hindi, but which is um, warmups and stuff like that. So confidence to me is like that. You start you, using that at a very small level. Um, everyday life, you know, when you're in school, there were times when I was in school where I used to take the other hall, uh, hallway because I didn't wanna bump into someone else. When I started high school, by the time I was in 11th grade, I was walking in the middle of the hallway.

• 1:04:14Lewis Howes?

  You're stood around, you get people moving away, yeah.

• 1:04:16Speaker 04

  I was like, excuse me, I didn't even have to say that, I was just walking. Because, and that's the same person, but I think that in any profession or any aspect of life, confidence is, perception is reality. Most people believe that, right? You know that how people perceive you is what they think reality is. So give them something perceivable.

• 1:04:37Lewis Howes?

  Hmm. Amen to that. What would you say are three things on a daily basis that you do to build confidence that you think anyone could apply for their life, even if they feel like they have no confidence?

• 1:04:48Speaker 04

  When I wake up in the morning, I take time in the bathroom. Like, I, I shower, I will, you know, pick the outfit that I'm feeling today. I will, um, you know, sort of doing my makeup and my hair sort of helps me, uh, or my skincare routine, actually, at night, helps me be sort of introspective. Otherwise, through the day, I'm very erratic. I have, you know, multiple balls in the air. Um, professionally, I'm doing a lot of things. I'm always behind on time. I'm always playing catch up. So at the end of the night and the beginning of the day, I really give myself some silence. I play music and, you know, um, I put my creams on and I really think about

• 1:05:29Speaker 04

  what the day is going to be like and how my first step outside room is going to be. When I take that first step outside my safe space, it sets the tone for my day. So I try not to have it be erratic or scary or like, you know, if I'm late and if I'm running, that always sets the tone for my energy through the day. So I try to really, you know, start my day on the tone I want to have and the confidence I want to have. And at every given step during, um, the day, I remind myself of the things I have instead of the things I don't have.

• 1:06:04Lewis Howes?

  Hmm.

• 1:06:06Speaker 04

  Like insecurity comes from, a lot of it sometimes I think comes from, oh my gosh, I don't have this, it's not good enough, or I'm not good enough for. Particular scenario or a particular situation or, you know, we start judging ourselves. And this was another lesson, actually, and activity that my mom and I used to do is we used to count our blessings. And, you know, me and my husband do it too. Whenever we're feeling crazy because our schedules are insane. We're, you know, always in different parts of the world. Um, we do that. We count our blessings about just five things that whenever you're feeling sort of crazy and unstable. That, um, you know, you have that you're really grateful for. And I'm not even saying this superficially.

• 1:06:47Speaker 04

  This was, um, like truly an exercise. No matter how badly off you are. Someone else is worse off than you. That makes it so easy to count your blessings.

• 1:06:59Lewis Howes?

  I mean, especially watching this, uh, this latest movie that you're in, I mean, White Tiger. It, I've been, I've only been India once. I went there four years ago and studied meditation in Chennai. Uh, for a couple of weeks, but I went to Delhi and, you know, kind of traveled around a little bit. I didn't see everything, but I saw a lot of, uh, dark things and a lot of things that were constantly reminded me, wow, I have a lot to be grateful for every moment. So I think it's important to have that perspective in our lives that we always have something to be grateful for. Even when it's the darkest time, there's something to be grateful for.

• 1:07:33Speaker 04

  Absolutely. And that's so empowering. That to me is my greatest mantra is, you know, truly and tangibly do it on your fingers. Do it like just five things. Um, and it's, it's a great exercise to do with someone as well, your kids, your family, you know? Um, anytime it's just like five things, then you have to just say, rattle it out. Um, the five things that you can think of at that point. But, um, you know, the, the crazy part about the White Tiger is that it's based in India and you probably reacted to it because it's, it's shot so authentically. But if you think about it. The majority of the world lives in those conditions.

• 1:08:13Speaker 04

  You know, and um the socioeconomic divide that exists right now is only increasing. Like even the Sustainable Development Goals have been set to eradicate extreme poverty because it's such a big problem. There's such a large population of the world. And we as privileged society, we as privileged people, anyone who has a roof above their head and meals um on their table is privileged. And as privileged people, like that's something that's our concern. Um, you know, there's a large generation of children who don't have a choice in their future or in their lives. They don't know if they can have aspirations or dreams.

• 1:08:57Speaker 04

  And um how desensitized we were last time, you know, you've driven past a homeless shelter and you've not even looked at it. Or a homeless person and not even looked at them. It's the desensitization that we as people who have um and that's the differentiation between the have-nots. But it's also a reality and it's a reality every everywhere in the world.

• 1:09:20Lewis Howes?

  I don't want to give away the whole movie. I want everyone to watch it because it's really powerful and uh and inspiring to see uh someone come from, you know, poverty to essentially become, uh you know, an entrepreneur and be successful in their own way. And the the story is really powerful, but you took on a role that is I I found fascinating because that's probably not, I don't know if that's what how you would react in real life. Because I know you have such a giving, grateful heart, caring about humanity. But your character does something that's very controversial. And uh you essentially, from my opinion, don't take accountability.

• 1:09:56Speaker 04

  Um, yeah.

• 1:09:57Lewis Howes?

  And and how how did you feel?

• 1:10:01Lewis Howes?

  Doing a role that is probably against your morals, your values and the way you live your life right now.

• 1:10:07Speaker 04

  I never judge my characters, um, you know, like I never judge people. Live and let live, each person is individual to their decisions. And if I started to judge, I would never be able to play bad guys and I love playing bad guys.

• 1:10:24Speaker 04

  But um, I think what was most interesting for me when I was playing Pinky is she's an American. You know, she and I'm an Indian who's grown up in India and understands the complexity of the diversity of that country. There is no one India, there is multiple Indias and you can spend your whole life trying to get to know it and you'll still never know her. So this is one aspect of India that is showcased in this movie, but it's also. It's more than that, it's the story of this one man and everyone else from his perspective. So it's not us looking at him or the country, it's him looking at all of us saying, oh.

• 1:11:07Speaker 04

  You know, and especially with my character, she's woke, but she's fake woke, right? She's one of those girls who's like, why don't you pull yourselves out of your circumstances? I, my parents worked in a bodega, you know, and I pulled myself out, why don't you do it? He doesn't have a roof over his shoulders. His pa- his family doesn't have food, it's a completely different complexity that. Most woke people don't have the ability to understand, including me, I lived there and I can't claim to understand it because. You know, I um, have had um, you know, basic lively life rights uh, since I was a child. I've been to school, I've had an opinion of about where my future is going to be choices.

• 1:11:52Speaker 04

  Um, and that's what's so amazing to me about this movie was that I I leaned into playing a character that was fake woke and, you know, pivoted when it wasn't convenient. Me and my husband both, uh, in the movie, not my real husband.

• 1:12:06Lewis Howes?

  Right, right.

• 1:12:07Speaker 04

  Um, my cha- the character in my, um, in the movie. Both of us sort of like were like, this is not the right thing, but you know, when it wasn't, when it was inconvenient, we kind of stood back and watched and that's a very human testament.

• 1:12:21Lewis Howes?

  I'm curious about, um, your evolution as a, a woman in this industry. Typically, younger women are more desirable for opportunities in their late teens, early twenties, and it's like when you're twenty six, twenty seven, it's almost like you're old as a woman and you may not be the young sexy one anymore or something in this industry. How do you feel after getting into your late thirties now? How have you evolved personally to not allow that stigma to hold you back from being who you want to be, from accepting yourself, from loving yourself, from innovating and reinventing yourself that you've done so many times? How do you not let that stigma hold you back?

• 1:13:01Speaker 04

  I can't say that I don't. I just am hoping that it doesn't happen to me, you know? We live in a world where anything is possible right now, as we've seen in the last few year, a few months, years as well. Um, and I, I think that I remember when I was in my, when I was twenty eight, um, my mom sat me down one day and she said, you know, um, you, uh, girls have a shelf life and you're reaching that where, you know, the older boys, um, they're always looking for the younger girl to act with. And even if they're in their fifties, you know, they're still going to be working with twenty year olds, but you're going to be old and you need to think about a business.

• 1:13:45Speaker 04

  Um, if acting opportunities stop coming your way, that's how I actually started my production house. Because I was like, you're right, what if I'm like, I need to be financially independent in my life. But at the same time, while this was happening to me, I recognized that innovation and reinventing who I am, even for me. Is so important and being true to the craft that I'm doing and the the service that I have to provide, which is my job. So I started trying new things. I started wanting to grow. I didn't want to stagnate into doing the same kind of roles. I didn't want to stagnate in, you know, similar kind of parts or even languages and borders.

• 1:14:28Speaker 04

  And I did music. I was signed as a record recording artist to Interscope, Prem and Bose. Um, I pivoted from that into television that I had never done, English language TV. Then I moved into features in America. Now I'm producing in India and America and acting in both these countries, which are two of the greatest movie industries in the world. But if I sat down to think about the glass ceiling that was built for me, um, I would never have a trajectory powerful enough to break it.

• 1:14:59Lewis Howes?

  Wow.

• 1:14:59Speaker 04

  Cause I didn't make that glass ceiling. So I don't want to think about where it is. You know, it's been made by other people. So you just kind of have to have, you know, speed and run towards your end game. And, you know, have a goal and be ambitious and fuel that ambition every single day.

• 1:15:17Lewis Howes?

  What is the end game?

• 1:15:19Speaker 04

  To have a legacy, I think. I want my um, children to be proud of, you know, the the legacy that I've had. I want to be, hopefully, you know, part of um, you know, the history books of entertainment where I may have contributed to the arts in some way. Um, with the work that I have done or the work that I create or the work that I will do. So I want to be able to, as a woman, you know, um, leave a better world for the girls after us, like the women before me did for me. I don't think about voting today. I don't think about driving today. I don't think about aspiring to have the same job as a man.

• 1:16:01Speaker 04

  And all of those fights um, were fought by women that came before me. So it's my responsibility and our responsibility as a generation to leave it better for the next one. So those are broad strokes of my end games.

• 1:16:17Lewis Howes?

  And what I mean, I'm sure you get this question a lot. I'm just curious because my audience is a lot of high achievers. They they're big dreamers. They're going after what they want. They're learning the skills, the tools to become more confident, more more giving, all those things. It sounds like you're doing everything all at the same time. How do you navigate intimacy, connection, love with, you know, you know, your husband, your family, your friends, the people that matter the most to you? How do you navigate relationships with such a busy, full plate?

• 1:16:46Speaker 04

  It's not easy. Um, you know, there's not as much face time as you would possibly want, but I, when I made the deal with the devil about, you know, running at this fast pace many years ago, I realized that there would be sacrifices that are required. And, um, you know, when you have, there's no free lunch in the world. And when you have ambitions, you've got to sort of pay for it. And, um, but I overcompensate, or I try and compensate with making sure even if I don't have face time, or if I like for a very long time in my life, I missed, um, you know, birthdays and Diwali and New Years, and I would always be working.

• 1:17:29Speaker 04

  All I could do was apologize. And my family always understood because, you know, I was I was working at something. But I think that I I I made sure that I always call. I never forget birthdays. I will always call on a birthday. If I go to a city, even if I can't meet someone, my family, my friends, I'll make sure we face time. We'll call. I'm very, it made me very thoughtful about the people I love. I love loving the people I, um, that I care about. I love making them feel special. And I love being empathetic. And I I I think it's very important, um, to leave the baggage

• 1:18:10Speaker 04

  of the job behind when you walk into your house and just be true to what you're feeling. I I think it's, it's important to choose relationships when you're really busy, because we can all be caught up in life. And, you know, life is like, A really fast river, you know, you don't know what the currents are going to be because it's just moving. You don't know what you're gonna bump into because it's just moving. But you have to choose to hold on to something when you wanna take a breath, right? Just like that, you have to choose to hold on to a relationship. Whatever that might be with your children, with your family, with your parents, you have to make the time. And you have to tell the people you love that you love them. Don't just assume that they know.

• 1:18:54Lewis Howes?

  You've got some wisdom, Priyanka. I love this.

• 1:18:57Speaker 04

  Oh, thank you.

• 1:18:58Lewis Howes?

  I'm I'm curious about, I know how uh meaningful the relationship was with your your father. And he obviously got to experience a lot of your success and and I'm sure he was extremely proud of you for, you know, the three thousand movies and all the projects you worked on.

• 1:19:15Lewis Howes?

  But I'm curious, what do you think personally he would be most proud of that you've done in your life since his passing?

• 1:19:23Speaker 04

  Um, that I didn't give up. Um, you know, that I didn't rest on my laurels. He used to always push me. He would always push me to never be satisfied with what I have. He pushed my ambition. He flamed my ambition. He was always like, what's the next thing? What are we doing? He loved hearing stories about the next movies that I was doing. I used to literally narrate them them to him in in the hospital bed as well. This is my character and I used to break down my characters with him or movies that I wanted to make. Um, and, you know, there were phases in my life, like that a little bit of a dark phase, especially after my dad died, where I felt like I don't know if I could keep up with the life that I had built.

• 1:20:07Speaker 04

  Um, and what was expected of me by then. Um, because I personally took a hit. And I personally was feeling

• 1:20:17Speaker 04

  sad and, you know, sadness sort of.

• 1:20:21Speaker 04

  Sadness is strangely seductive. You know, it kind of sucks you in and you're it's like it feels comfortable. It feels like you're floating and it's easy. Light might be harsh a little bit, but the joy that you feel when you choose light, when you choose to let go of the seduction of sadness. Um, I think my dad was afraid that because I'm very sensitive that I would have been seduced by sadness for a long time. He was very afraid of that. Uh, even before he died, he still always talked to me about, don't be sad, do not be sad. That's I'm not going away. I'm always with you, you know?

• 1:21:03Speaker 04

  But I was, I was tremendously sad and but it it take it takes choosing yourself and I've done that multiple times um, in my life and I think it's such a powerful tool. Cause the longest relationship you have is with yourself.

• 1:21:19Lewis Howes?

  I read somewhere that about you sharing that you come into this place alone, you leave this place alone. You've got to, you know, build that relationship with yourself. I love that you keep saying choose yourself. Cause I think it's important for people to be to be reminded that we need to choose ourselves when no one else will choose us. We need to be there for ourselves when we're sad.

• 1:21:37Speaker 04

  It's no one's job. It's no one's job to choose someone else. You know, your parents will do it for a while. Your spouses will do it for a while. Maybe your children will do it for a while. But you are no one else's responsibility, but your own.

• 1:21:52Lewis Howes?

  Yeah.

• 1:21:52Speaker 04

  And what you do with your life and the choices you make dictate the sum of your life. It's it's such a it's such simple math, actually. We are the sum of all our choices.

• 1:22:05Lewis Howes?

  Thank you so much for listening. I hope you enjoyed today's episode and it inspired you on your journey towards greatness. Make sure to check out the show notes in the description for a full rundown of today's show with all the important links. And also make sure to share this with a friend and subscribe over on Apple Podcasts as well. I really love hearing feedback from you guys. So share a review over on Apple and let me know what part of this episode resonated with you the most. And if no one's told you lately, I want to remind you that you are loved, you are worthy and you matter. And now it's time to go out there and do something great.