Conan, Sona, and Matt Discuss the LA Fires

Conan, Sona, and Matt discuss the loss of Sona’s home in Altadena and their experiences in the wake of the devastation caused by the Los Angeles wildfires. Information on how to donate to LA Wildfire relief funds: Altadena Chamber of Commerce https://www.altadenachamber.org/ LAFD https://supportlafd.org/ The Eaton Canyon Fire Relief and Recovery Fund https://pasadenacf.org/supporting-our-community-eaton-canyon-fire-relief-recovery-fund/ World Kitchen https://wck.org Baby 2 Baby https://baby2baby.org/ Core https://www.coreresponse.org/southern-california-wildfires/

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:02Speaker 00

  Fall is here, hear the yell, back to school, ring the bell, brand new shoes, walkin' blues, climb the fence, books and pens, I can tell that we are gonna be friends. I can tell that we are gonna be friends.

• 0:22Conan O'Brien?

  Hello, welcome to Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend. It is a massive understatement to say this is a special episode or a unique episode. We are doing this episode without any guest. This is the first time we've all been together since the wildfires broke out. And there's a lot to discuss and do process. We don't usually do this, but I'm just gonna say the date. It's Thursday, January 16th, 2025.

• 1:04Conan O'Brien?

  Fires broke out, I believe it was a week and two days ago, right?

• 1:10Speaker 02

  Yeah, Tuesday night.

• 1:12Conan O'Brien?

  Tuesday, I think it started Tuesday afternoon and then got worse and worse and worse throughout the day. And we've all had our own experiences, but really, we have to start by acknowledging that Sona, you lost your house.

• 1:27Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:27Conan O'Brien?

  And there, you know.

• 1:29Speaker 03

  I would last longer before I started crying, sorry.

• 1:33Conan O'Brien?

  Well, listen, this is the.

• 1:35Speaker 03

  I really thought I was like, keep it together.

• 1:38Conan O'Brien?

  Well, you don't have to keep it together. You don't have to keep it together.

• 1:42Conan O'Brien?

  There's, you know, you and I have texted a lot and talked some on the phone, but words just seem so stupid when somebody lost their home.

• 1:53Speaker 03

  Yeah. It's not stupid. It means a lot when you check in and just everybody texting. I haven't been able to even respond. There's people who've texted that I haven't even talked to in years. It feels really good at a time like this to feel like people are thinking about you.

• 2:12Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 2:13Speaker 03

  Um, so it's nice. So don't.

• 2:15Conan O'Brien?

  Well, let's, let's lead with, uh, let's lead with, um, Tac, your husband, your, uh, is, is, and, and your boys.

• 2:24Speaker 03

  My boys.

• 2:25Conan O'Brien?

  Mikey and Charlie. Uh, what do Mikey and Charlie know? Do they know anything?

• 2:29Speaker 03

  They don't have a clue about what's going on. They think, they think we, we told them, we, you know, there's always this like, oh, you should be honest with your kids and tell them. And we're like, no, we're just not going to tell them that their house burned down. I think that that's probably the, for us, the right thing to do. I, I gave them emails when they were babies. So I emailed them their future selves and I said, this is what happened to this house that you were born, you came into when you were first born in the first three year and a half years of your life. But they think we're just living somewhere else until we build a house and they're really into construction. So like, Mikey's like, I'll drive the cement mixer and Charlie can drive the excavator.

• 3:12Speaker 03

  And it's like, you're not going to build it, like.

• 3:15Speaker 02

  So they're not going to find out about their new, the old house till they're 18 and they get the email?

• 3:20Speaker 03

  So. Well, I don't know about 18.

• 3:22Conan O'Brien?

  They're, how old are they now? They're three and a half?

• 3:24Speaker 03

  They're three and a half and they're honestly, we're living with my parents right now. They're getting toys every day. I don't think they've ever been happier.

• 3:33Conan O'Brien?

  Cause people are just, everyone's saying, oh my God, the boys, the boys, the poor boys. And they're just, they just know, I mean, I used to think this way about snowstorms when I was a kid. I was just good news and the, the people, it didn't matter what happened to anyone else. If school was canceled. So for, in their perspective, all they know is there's going to be some fun construction.

• 3:54Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 3:54Conan O'Brien?

  And they get to build the house.

• 3:56Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah.

• 3:57Conan O'Brien?

  Which I think you should let them do.

• 3:58Speaker 03

  Okay. Well, they can get licensed and I don't think they can.

• 4:02Conan O'Brien?

  I think they can. Uh, but can I ask, and again, I'm not. I just, how these things unfold is such a mystery. I know that for all of us, I was here working on Tuesday. We weren't podcasting, but I was meeting with writers and we were talking about the Oscars and we were working on that with that team. And I got a phone call from my wife saying, well, there's some smoke. And I remember thinking, well, we've been through this before. We've been evacuated. There's also been smoke and we haven't been evacuated. So there's very much, it's part of life in LA. And so I wasn't thinking that much about it. And then the next thing I know, she was like, we've been evacuated.

• 4:46Conan O'Brien?

  And so I went from here to, you know, whatever. We went to a hotel. And I went to sleep that night thinking, because we live in the Palisades. And I just remembered thinking, I'm pretty sure that our house will go. And it did not.

• 5:11Conan O'Brien?

  But just the number of people I've heard from, people I know personally, who lost houses is stunning.

• 5:20Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 5:20Conan O'Brien?

  It's, it's, it's crazy. And I know you're in Altadena and it must be the same thing where it's not just you. You must know so many people.

• 5:30Speaker 03

  It's our entire, our entire street, our whole neighborhood has just been, just, just destroyed. It looks, it's hard for me to look at pictures. It looks really almost apocalyptic. There's just nothing there. And we've been talking to all our neighbors. Everyone's okay. But it is, you know, we, we really loved that community.

• 5:55Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 5:55Speaker 03

  And it's, it's really sad that it's all gone.

• 5:58Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 6:01Speaker 03

  I think that's the thing too, is that you're, you're really sad for other people who also lost their houses. And so you just. You all kind of like commiserate together. I'm on a group with like 70 other people from Altadena on a WhatsApp group and we're all talking about what the next steps are. So that's keeping us busy. But you're right. It's just the number of people I know who lost their homes is, I mean, it's like, it's just unthinkable. It's, it's, it's crazy. But thankfully, we, everybody that we reached out to is safe somewhere. So that's, that's important. But it is, oh, it sucks.

• 6:39Conan O'Brien?

  Is there anything, I'm, is there anything that you're doing now that at least helps you feel like you can take steps? Like, I don't, the process of, we've been, I've been locked out of, we've been, no one gets close to our neighborhood. I don't know when we'll get back to our neighborhood. Um, but you've got this other consideration of, okay, what are the steps involved? Meaning,

• 7:02Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 7:03Conan O'Brien?

  do you, uh, with insurance claims, things like that?

• 7:06Speaker 03

  We, we put in an insurance claim. It's all this stuff and people are sending us so much stuff about property taxes, about, you know, what you could do with your mortgage payments, about signing up for FEMA, signing up for this, signing up for that. And it's, I think I just, I want my kids to go back to their school, which is fine.

• 7:25Conan O'Brien?

  The school's okay?

• 7:25Speaker 03

  Yeah. Tax back at work. I'm back. I, I want like normalcy and then we'll probably end up having to rent a house for a while and then, you know, figuring it out. You, it's just, there's like a thousand questions. It's crazy how many.

• 7:40Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. And you can't process it all at once.

• 7:42Speaker 03

  No, you can't. And that's the thing. It's just, there's so much to do. And, you know, I don't like doing anything. And now I have to like fill out forms.

• 7:52Conan O'Brien?

  Right.

• 7:52Speaker 03

  And I have to think about things.

• 7:54Speaker 02

  Especially in the state you're in. I can't imagine having to do that stuff that's already awful.

• 7:59Conan O'Brien?

  But sometimes is that helpful to? Engage in like, okay, this is a tangible thing I can do that gets us to the next step. Rather than just sit and think about, perseverate, worry about what's happened.

• 8:12Speaker 03

  It's just so much stuff to the, I mean, also I realized I'm not good under pressure. We saw the flames from the ridge near our house and we, we, and I, we had a friend who's, whose husband works in the LAFD. And she's like, you should probably just evacuate and then, but everything was moving east and we're west. And then all of a sudden at 3:30, when we were at my mom's house, there was an evacuation order for our, our area. And then my alarm company called around six and they're like, the sensors in the living room and in the master are picking up movement. And I thought, oh, is that, can you tell if it's a person or what is it? And she's like, we can't tell. And I, I, I asked her, I was like, are they flames?

• 8:56Speaker 03

  And she didn't know. And then we just, I hung up and I was like, I think my house is currently on fire. And it was, I was just sitting in my car, just like sobbing and I was like, oh my God, my, my house is on, is on fire. And then my parents' house got evacuated. And so Tac and I were like, I, and I like grabbed Charlie and Mikey out of the bed. And I just put them in and I'm like, let's just drive south. I don't know where we're going. So we went to Orange County and we just stayed there through Sunday and we made the boys think we were on vacation. And so we were like-

• 9:31Conan O'Brien?

  You sent me this great video of them on the beach.

• 9:33Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 9:33Conan O'Brien?

  Just having a wonderful time, your boys.

• 9:35Speaker 03

  Having a blast. Yeah. They're just totally clueless, which is nice. It's nice to be around them because they have no idea what's going on. And I think they're one of five, they're two of, we're, we're one of five families in their school that all lost their homes. So, you know, it's going to be interesting for them to go back to school and I, I hope people don't treat them any different. You know, we want to just sort of keep things the same. I just want to fast forward to six months from now where like I look back on all the stuff and I'm like, ah, it's okay. It's all just stuff. And then, you know, but-

• 10:10Conan O'Brien?

  Can I ask, did you have a chance? Before you left your house, did you have a chance to get anything?

• 10:15Speaker 03

  I took some stuff. I took like the very important like family heirloom jewelry. I took my grandma's ice bucket, which is like, it's not, you can get it on eBay. It's not like, it's not a special ice bucket, but it was.

• 10:31Conan O'Brien?

  I went back in and got my Crocs.

• 10:34Speaker 02

  One of them.

• 10:35Conan O'Brien?

  I got one of my Crocs.

• 10:36Speaker 02

  I just wanted one of them.

• 10:37Conan O'Brien?

  I really liked the left Croc.

• 10:42Conan O'Brien?

  But you got some heirlooms.

• 10:43Speaker 03

  We got some heirlooms, but there's a lot of things I think about that are gone and that makes me really sad. I had a personalized Kobe autographed picture that's gone.

• 10:53Conan O'Brien?

  That's right. He was on our Tonight Show.

• 10:55Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 10:56Conan O'Brien?

  And I remembered I introduced you to him and said, this is your number one fan and he was so nice to you.

• 11:01Speaker 03

  He was really nice and he, he signed an autograph for me and my brother. And then, uh, when we met Jimmy Carter and he signed the photo, I had that one, that's gone. There's just a lot of little things that are, nothing I can't live without, but I, I don't want, I, I just, I really miss that stuff. And it's, and also it's weird, when we were in Orange County, we like packed up our stuff and we're like, everything we own is just in our car right now. And that's a very weird thing to think about, that like, all of your possessions, everything that is something that you, you, you've accumulated over the last 40 years, they're all gone and all you have left is whatever's in this van. And it's just, it's just really sad.

• 11:43Conan O'Brien?

  I think too, there's a mantra everyone has now, which is correct, which is, oh, it's just stuff. And as long as we're okay, and as long as my family's okay, and that's true. But you also have to acknowledge it's a loss.

• 11:56Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 11:57Conan O'Brien?

  It's a loss because there, it's not so much the stuff itself, it's what it signifies, it's the memories. And, um, you have to process that. You can't skip over.

• 12:09Speaker 02

  You know, we're all okay. You can't skip right to that and stay there because you are gonna feel all these things.

• 12:15Speaker 03

  I know, and it's weird. It does feel like you're kind of grieving and you realize like, I mean, I wish I took like I had a bin full of the boys like first three years, like little things that I wanted to keep forever. And that's gone. But you know, and then you're like holding out, maybe we'll go back and like we'll find things that we like in the rubble of whatever's left and we'll just like find something and just be really happy that things still exist. So we're also waiting when we can go back. I mean, the National Guard is everywhere and so we can't go to our house and you know, the air quality sucks and everything's just ash. But you know, I think-

• 12:53Speaker 02

  And the fires are still burning. That's the crazy part too.

• 12:56Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah. You know what?

• 12:56Speaker 02

  55% contained.

• 12:57Speaker 03

  They are.

• 12:58Speaker 02

  Eaten in what Palisades is 22% or something as of today?

• 13:02Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 13:02Speaker 02

  Contained. That's it. Yeah.

• 13:04Speaker 03

  Um, the thing is, and this is, I was telling, I was telling Blay about this yesterday. Me and Erica Brown went shopping and like the third, because I need a whole new, I need all new things, everything new. And we went and it kind of like was brought up when I was checking out somewhere that my house was gone. And she's like, oh, we give a 20% discount to victims of the fire. And me and Erica were like, we have to call all the stores we just went to and just be like, do you give a 20% discount? But then it's awkward because you go to a store and you're just like, uh, my, my house burned down?

• 13:44Conan O'Brien?

  Also, do you need to, did they want you to prove that?

• 13:47Speaker 02

  Yeah. How do you do that?

• 13:48Conan O'Brien?

  I have a piece of roof. And I keep it in my wallet. I mean, I don't know what the hell they're talking about.

• 13:55Speaker 03

  Well, then sometimes, but also it's like an awkward thing to bring up. It's like, hi, how are you doing? It's like, uh, uh, my house burned down. Do I get a discount?

• 14:04Speaker 02

  Usually it's like you get a free birthday meal at Denny's and you just show your ID.

• 14:09Speaker 03

  I know. And then Erica was like, stop saying your house burned down. Say you were displaced by the fires. She just wanted me to use a different wording.

• 14:16Conan O'Brien?

  No, I think burned down gets you the discount. I mean, I've been displaced and I do not deserve a 20% discount. Can you imagine me going around, oh, I've been displaced? I have to live in a pretty nice hotel. And so I demand.

• 14:34Conan O'Brien?

  They're 20% off.

• 14:36Speaker 02

  Sir, this is a frozen yogurt establishment.

• 14:42Conan O'Brien?

  Sir, you're buying a Rolex. I don't want to pay full price. And it's Patek Philippe to you, sir.

• 14:51Conan O'Brien?

  No, it's, it's, it's, it's absolute fucking craziness.

• 14:54Speaker 03

  It's just nuts. They're just like go around just being like, hi, uh, so the other stores are giving discounts. Like, can I get a discount here when my house burned down? And at first it was like, you know, it's hard to say, oh, my house burned down. I would cry every single time. And then I just like, I got to a point where I was like, hi, uh, my house burned down.

• 15:15Speaker 03

  What kind of discounts you got for me?

• 15:17Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 15:19Conan O'Brien?

  What if you're doing that five years from now? When you live in a beautiful new home and you're thriving and you've written like your third bestselling book? And you pull up in a, you know, in a like a, you pull up in a BMW, hey, my house burned down.

• 15:36Conan O'Brien?

  I'm getting some unleaded gas.

• 15:39Conan O'Brien?

  Looking at the price, what's the snob 20 off that? When did your house burn? Five years ago.

• 15:46Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, I also won the lottery last week.

• 15:47Speaker 03

  Oh, my God.

• 15:49Conan O'Brien?

  No, but it's, it's, um.

• 15:52Conan O'Brien?

  Man, it's, uh, it's, it's, it's been very hard to process. I, I don't know about you, but it's also just, uh. Well, I'm gonna switch to you for a minute, Gorale, because. You know, I know that you were in, there was a while there where I was pretty certain. Oh, Pasadena, I don't think that looks good. And I know your house, I, I just thought, is this gonna get you too? And I guess you, it, it, it didn't get to you, the fire, is that right?

• 16:21Speaker 02

  No, we were very lucky. We got really close to the evac warning zone and it was heading down the Arroyo. So we did pack and leave, but we, that's all. I mean, we just, we were.

• 16:32Conan O'Brien?

  Are you back in your house now?

• 16:33Speaker 02

  I am. The girls are still down at Momos in Long Beach where the air is clean.

• 16:37Speaker 03

  I know.

• 16:38Speaker 02

  Cause that's the other thing is this talk about the air quality index being okay, but that doesn't account for certain leads and asbestos toxins in the air and stuff, so. I don't know, I'm, wear a mask outside my house even though it's blue skies and there's ash and everything, but it's, it's just weird. Did you guys, did you guys pack and?

• 16:58Conan O'Brien?

  I couldn't, I was here, uh, I was.

• 17:00Speaker 02

  You couldn't be bothered?

• 17:01Conan O'Brien?

  I was, yeah, I couldn't be bothered. Um, I was like, don't I have people to do these things for me? No, I got a call from Liza, my wife at work, and she said, uh, okay, they told us we gotta go, and I said, okay. She said, I'm just gonna grab, um, like, two t-shirts, two pairs of socks, two pairs of under, whatever, a pair of jeans. I said, great. She said, do you need me to take anything else? And I said, just grab the E.B. White letter off the wall.

• 17:27Speaker 02

  Oh, that's nice.

• 17:27Conan O'Brien?

  Which is this letter that I, when I was, uh, 16, I wrote E.B. White a letter about how much I admired his writing and how I aspired to try and make something of myself, but I was afraid of criticism because I'm thin-skinned, and he wrote me back this beautiful note and it's signed E.B. White.

• 17:45Speaker 02

  Says, "P.S. If a fire happens, take this."

• 17:47Conan O'Brien?

  Take this, yeah. Uh, and, um, so that's kind of, I said, grab that, but I didn't think about anything else. Uh, um, and I, I don't know why I get into, and I think I've always been this way. I think I was, you know, uh, I can channel when I first moved out to L.A. and I had a, had a, on Cochrane Avenue, had a $380 a month apartment, and a 1977 Isuzu Opel that I bought at the airport for no money. Um, and I just always channel like, yep, I've been there before and I was really happy and I, I just have this kind of,

• 18:30Conan O'Brien?

  uh, if I, if that, whatever. If whatever something happens, I'm not gonna get another Isuzu Opel.

• 18:39Conan O'Brien?

  And I'm sorry.

• 18:40Speaker 02

  You'll never get to that height again.

• 18:41Conan O'Brien?

  I'm not. But, uh- But very, um, I don't know, I get on almost, uh, very calm about that and the material world and things like that. But then I also know if the reality came, there's my perception of how I would feel. And then, um, how would I really feel if that had happened? And we got really close. I mean, it was right up to our line of our house. And, um, and then you just, I don't know, uh, I could easily be here saying, we don't have our house. And like I say, I've spoken to many of my friends who lost their homes. And, uh, so

• 19:21Conan O'Brien?

  I don't know, you can't know how you would feel if that happened. So I have, you know, the possible illusion that I would say, well, it's just stuff. But no, I'm sure I would be devastated and emotional for a lot of reasons. But, um, it's just, uh, it's such a confusing time. And obviously, it's just, um, what can we all do for people? If only I knew someone who had lost their, oh, right, you were mentioning. No, but like I'm saying is what, you know, that's the question is how can, what can we do for you? You know, you're loved. You've got all of us here.

• 20:02Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 20:03Conan O'Brien?

  Money aside.

• 20:04Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 20:05Conan O'Brien?

  And, um, money and-

• 20:07Speaker 03

  I need money.

• 20:08Conan O'Brien?

  Money and food-

• 20:09Speaker 03

  I need lots. Can I live in your house? Can we all come live in your house?

• 20:13Conan O'Brien?

  Can I just set the parameters first?

• 20:14Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 20:15Conan O'Brien?

  Money aside, food aside, clothing aside.

• 20:18Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 20:19Speaker 02

  Love and affection aside.

• 20:20Conan O'Brien?

  Love and affection aside, um, sheltering you in any way at any one of my 19 mansions, scattered.

• 20:27Speaker 02

  Any further contact aside.

• 20:28Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. Uh, is there anything I can do for you? And also, I'm letting you go.

• 20:33Speaker 03

  Oh, no!

• 20:34Conan O'Brien?

  Is this a bad time?

• 20:35Speaker 03

  No, bad time!

• 20:36Speaker 02

  I mean, you might as well pull off the band-.

• 20:37Conan O'Brien?

  Here's what I'm saying. The band-.

• 20:39Speaker 03

  Come on, Gourley!

• 20:40Conan O'Brien?

  Both be torn off. Let's go the rest of the way.

• 20:42Speaker 03

  I need this. I know. I'm like, am I, am I-

• 20:45Conan O'Brien?

  I had to make a decision. You were Gourley and he does so much in the editing.

• 20:51Speaker 03

  I've worked for you for so long!

• 20:52Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, I've been-

• 20:57Conan O'Brien?

  Conan Fire Sona on podcasts where she talks about losing her home. I'm looking forward to that headline.

• 21:02Speaker 02

  I know.

• 21:03Speaker 03

  Oh, I am really glad your house is, because the Palisades is also very, very scary.

• 21:08Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 21:08Speaker 03

  And I really was worried you were gonna lose it. And I know you're not attached to the things in your, like you're saying you are, but I'm very attached to the things in your house.

• 21:20Speaker 03

  And I think also if you lost yours, it would overshadow mine a lot. So in a way, I'm like, just really happy that you're okay.

• 21:29Conan O'Brien?

  I'm gonna have mine destroyed. It makes you feel better.

• 21:32Speaker 02

  This is the ultimate, I get to talk last thing that you guys do, you know, where you get the last word.

• 21:38Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, so you say you lost your house, did you? Well, guess what?

• 21:41Speaker 02

  Oh, my God.

• 21:44Conan O'Brien?

  My leg kind of hurts. So I think I win. Um, well, uh, you are, and it's funny because people, I think, I hope it comes through, but this is a real relationship.

• 21:56Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 21:57Conan O'Brien?

  Um, you and I have been, I mean, Gourley, I don't barely know the guy.

• 22:00Speaker 02

  I mean, I wouldn't even say that about myself.

• 22:02Conan O'Brien?

  Johnny come lately, uh, icy to the touch. Um, but.

• 22:07Speaker 02

  Well, if you'd just touched me once, maybe you'd know.

• 22:10Conan O'Brien?

  Dad, keep rubbing that icicle. But, uh, you know, you've got us and, uh, and we will all help you in any way we can.

• 22:22Speaker 03

  Thank you.

• 22:22Conan O'Brien?

  And I do think that this is, there's no way to fast forward through this. It's gonna be a day to day thing for you.

• 22:30Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 22:31Conan O'Brien?

  For quite a while.

• 22:31Speaker 03

  I do, I do. I know we talked about Altadena a lot and we talked, we joked about it a lot, but it was, it is a really special place.

• 22:40Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 22:40Speaker 03

  It was an incredible place to raise my kids. And I just, I hope, I hope we find a way to get back there, even after all this. I just, um, no, I've lived in LA my whole life and I was just, that's the happiest I've ever been.

• 22:56Conan O'Brien?

  Right.

• 22:56Speaker 03

  So I just want to make sure people know it's, it's a really incredible place. It's an incredible community. The people there are just amazing. The way that also Los Angeles is just banded together is.

• 23:08Conan O'Brien?

  Yes.

• 23:09Speaker 03

  As someone who is from here, and girls, I know you're from here too, it's really inspiring. It's beautiful. It's, um. It's uplifting. There's just little bright spots in, in all of this shittiness and you know, the way the city comes together.

• 23:24Conan O'Brien?

  So many people have risen to the challenge and been

• 23:26Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 23:29Conan O'Brien?

  remarkably generous and human. And I lived in New York during nine 11 and I'm seeing the same thing again, where people ask each other, you know, how are you doing? How are you? Where do you live? Are you okay? And had that conversation this morning at Bricks and Scones, which is the coffee place right next to us. Just, you just start asking people, how are you? Where do you live? Are you all right? Are you okay? And it, it does, these things do bring sometimes the worst out of people, but often the best out of people. And I was remembering we, you know, the last time we did our Outdoor Chill Chums podcast

• 24:09Conan O'Brien?

  was from Sona's backyard in Altadena, which is a really nice memory. And what I remember most is, uh, what a great time we had, but also that your neighbors came by, you had neighbors coming by to say hi.

• 24:23Speaker 03

  The Austins, yeah.

• 24:25Conan O'Brien?

  And, um, uh, and it, uh, there's a vibrant community there that I, I think is resilient and can come back.

• 24:36Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 24:37Conan O'Brien?

  I mean, it's, it's easy for me to say, but I do think there's.

• 24:40Speaker 02

  I think there's such a will to bring that city back. It's not just a faceless city.

• 24:45Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 24:45Speaker 02

  You've seen so many people talk about how much they love Altadena. And I think that they are the city. So the houses may be gone, but they'll bring them back and they'll keep the city. Well, now I heard you lost your house. I just felt like desperate to do something for you. It's so hard to know how much to offer to people in this situation because you feel some, they must be bombarded with this. Are they being overloaded? But anything you would ever need, I think people, all your friends would be desperate to help you guys in any way, you know?

• 25:17Speaker 03

  Um, you know what? I am in a, we, we're really lucky. We're, our family is here. They're all in LA. We had no shortage of places to go. So which is very, uh, we're very fortunate for that. There's a lot of people who don't have anything and don't have any connections. And I think before people think about sending stuff to us, um, I think you should definitely look into people who really need it. Like I, the boys have more underwear than they've ever had before. They've had, they have more socks. I can't stress how many toys they have now. They, I think they just think that that's their life now. Every day a package comes and there's more toys and they're just like, this is the best. We're living at Yaya's house. They're like

• 26:00Speaker 03

  just eating. She's feeding them constantly. They're eating. They're having more screen time and watching more TV than they ever have before. Like, so they're, they're happy. We're, we're happy if they're happy. So we're, we're okay.

• 26:13Conan O'Brien?

  Is there? I mean, that's the other thing too, is we could find out and plug it in, but if there's a, a charity or there's a place that makes sense.

• 26:23Speaker 02

  One thing I've found that's been very helpful is there's a database of the least funded GoFundMes for individual families.

• 26:30Conan O'Brien?

  Yes.

• 26:30Speaker 02

  And so you can find the people that need help.

• 26:33Conan O'Brien?

  My wife, my wife has been on to this and, uh, I shut it down because I was like, I was thinking of taking up golf and I want to buy those. No.

• 26:43Speaker 03

  Oh my God.

• 26:44Conan O'Brien?

  I like a guy who doesn't even.

• 26:45Speaker 03

  Your true colors are showing.

• 26:46Conan O'Brien?

  I wonder how long. Are you donating money to people that really need it? I set the clock the minute this happened. It was like, how soon? It's possible I could one day play golf. In which time clubs would need to be procured. No, she, uh,

• 27:01Conan O'Brien?

  she found that and it's amazing. It's amazing.

• 27:04Speaker 02

  Findable, I think.

• 27:05Conan O'Brien?

  Well, obviously it can get sensitive. What's the right, where's the right place to, to give money? If you can give money or to donate, um, and we need to be sensitive about that. We will do research. We'll maybe in the links that connect to this episode, give some suggestions, uh, but there are so many different ways. Uh oh, what happened?

• 27:29Speaker 03

  The links that connect to this episode is just.

• 27:32Speaker 02

  It's cute.

• 27:32Speaker 03

  It's cute. It's, it's just in, it's gonna be in the summary of the episode.

• 27:37Speaker 02

  Also, links are connections to the episodes, so.

• 27:41Speaker 03

  It's okay. It's okay. It's not your fault. It's not your fault.

• 27:45Speaker 02

  This is a different episode.

• 27:46Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 27:47Speaker 02

  It's okay.

• 27:48Speaker 03

  It's fine. We should have given you a script. Anytime links are mentioned, we should just tell you exactly how to say it. And that's on us.

• 27:58Conan O'Brien?

  I think the burn I just suffered.

• 28:01Speaker 02

  Oh my god.

• 28:02Conan O'Brien?

  Is every bit is bad.

• 28:05Speaker 02

  Well, they'll be.

• 28:05Conan O'Brien?

  As the one that attacked your home.

• 28:07Speaker 02

  There'll be links connected to the, this episode to donate to Conan.

• 28:11Conan O'Brien?

  If you want to, I, I think now, after the way I was just attacked. For, okay, maybe, am I fluent in this new techno world?

• 28:19Speaker 02

  New?

• 28:21Conan O'Brien?

  Of the last 40 years? Maybe not.

• 28:24Speaker 03

  Techno world.

• 28:25Conan O'Brien?

  But, I've now been humiliated, and I feel I deserve compensation.

• 28:32Speaker 03

  You have a GoFundMe?

• 28:33Conan O'Brien?

  I have a GoFundMe. To help me, Conan O'Brien, recover from this dastardly blow. Um, I know, the minute I start talking, why do I, why didn't I, what am I gonna learn? Let you do it, or let you do it, because when I try and do it, it's.

• 28:51Speaker 03

  You're doing a really great job up until then.

• 28:53Conan O'Brien?

  You're talking to me like something, like I'm damaged.

• 28:55Speaker 03

  You're doing so good. Look at you.

• 28:58Speaker 02

  You are.

• 28:59Speaker 03

  And then we threw the word link in there, and that, that just got you all frazzled. That's okay.

• 29:03Conan O'Brien?

  When this episode comes through, through your machine.

• 29:07Speaker 02

  Oh no.

• 29:08Conan O'Brien?

  And you're tuning it to get the right frequency, look for a linkage.

• 29:13Speaker 02

  Just try this. Charity links in the show notes.

• 29:17Conan O'Brien?

  Charity links in the show notes.

• 29:18Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 29:19Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, but, here's, I know you, and it's the right thing to do. You're gonna keep all of my blundering and stumbling in there. You're not gonna edit it so I look good, and I applaud you for that, because it's gonna make a lot of people very happy.

• 29:29Speaker 02

  That's what keeps this show on top.

• 29:30Conan O'Brien?

  And can I say something? I cannot tell you how many people go, are you really that bad?

• 29:36Conan O'Brien?

  And I say, it's not a bit. I honestly don't know how this world works. They, that is a common thing people say to me is, no, no, just, just tell me something. Is that, they want to know if Jordan Schlansky's real. And I go, yeah, he really is. And they go, and when you talk about like tech stuff, are you really that bad?

• 29:56Speaker 02

  You may be the most like regressed technological person on a podcast, which is fairly technically advanced.

• 30:03Conan O'Brien?

  Well, that's why I surround myself with people who know.

• 30:05Speaker 03

  I love that your son is very, so fluent in it.

• 30:09Conan O'Brien?

  And.

• 30:10Speaker 03

  It's almost like God played a joke on you.

• 30:12Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, my son is very gifted at these things and I, he enjoys it so much. When I'm trying to do something, I do become, it is Zoolander, where they're looking at the computer. He just enjoys it. And he won't jump in and go, here, I'll do it. He'll go, so, uh, so what you trying to do there? What you doing? Well, I'm trying to see if I can clear this screen. Uh huh, yeah. So is that why you're hitting the, the plastic part? The cover? Just tell me what to do. No, no, you, why don't you tell me what it is you're trying to do? So he just tortures me.

• 30:50Speaker 03

  Oh, man.

• 30:50Conan O'Brien?

  He's a genius at it. He's.

• 30:52Speaker 03

  He's living from the best.

• 30:54Conan O'Brien?

  God gave him a wonderfully foolish father for him to enjoy. And, uh, but, um, is your, uh,

• 31:03Conan O'Brien?

  is your, your greater family, I mean, we talk about this a lot and we joke about it a lot, how connected you are to your family and your mom and dad. But it's also this great gift right now.

• 31:12Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 31:13Conan O'Brien?

  That, that you have these people in your life, that they're so close, you know? I've been living so far away from my family for so long.

• 31:21Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 31:21Conan O'Brien?

  That your family is, unit is there.

• 31:24Speaker 03

  It is there. It's also.

• 31:28Speaker 03

  Look, I love, I love my parents. But the moment I step into the house, I'm a 16-year-old angsty teenager. And this time, I'm coming with like my kids and my husband. But I'm still like, everything my mom says, I'm like, ugh. And I've been there for only like, what, like four days? We've been there and I'm just like, oh, I can't, I can't with it. And she's cooking a meal for us from scratch, you know? And I'm just kind of like, Mom, you're just, you don't get it, Mom. It's so much of me just being a kid again.

• 32:00Conan O'Brien?

  You've become a brat, kind of.

• 32:02Speaker 03

  I have, I've become an asshole a little bit. And I think that that's not healthy for anybody. So I don't know how long we're gonna last.

• 32:10Conan O'Brien?

  When am I allowed, and I will respect this.

• 32:13Speaker 03

  Oh, no.

• 32:13Conan O'Brien?

  But when am I allowed to start making jokes about your dad's mustache?

• 32:16Speaker 03

  Oh, God.

• 32:17Conan O'Brien?

  I'm just curious. I mean, and I will respect if you say it's gonna be three months or four months. And I love your dad, I love Gil.

• 32:23Speaker 02

  This is your opportunity to say like 10 years.

• 32:25Speaker 03

  I know, but when, when we were like texting, a part of me was like, well, my dad, you know, my dad can build a house because he's good with wood. Because he's, he built my, he carved my.

• 32:34Conan O'Brien?

  He carved your brother. Because he wanted a boy, a real boy. And then he became real.

• 32:40Speaker 03

  Why do I indulge you?

• 32:41Conan O'Brien?

  No, but I don't.

• 32:42Speaker 03

  What's wrong with me? I thought it was like, don't do it.

• 32:46Conan O'Brien?

  My true sickness is getting other people to start to do the bit themselves about them.

• 32:51Speaker 03

  I know.

• 32:52Conan O'Brien?

  That's my true evil power.

• 32:53Speaker 02

  It's like comedic Stockholm syndrome.

• 32:54Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 32:55Conan O'Brien?

  Uh, but, um.

• 32:57Speaker 03

  You, you know, there, you know, you don't. Even if I said, oh, you know what? I'd rather you just did it.

• 33:02Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 33:03Speaker 03

  Um, I think you would last.

• 33:05Conan O'Brien?

  Right. But your father's mustache wasn't damaged.

• 33:07Speaker 03

  Okay, you know what? I think we gotta wrap it up. We gotta wrap it up.

• 33:11Conan O'Brien?

  Is his mustache insured?

• 33:16Conan O'Brien?

  I don't know. I don't know.

• 33:21Speaker 02

  It's just a mustache.

• 33:22Conan O'Brien?

  Do you realize how happy I'd be if he shaved off half of it and went around saying, I lost half in the fire. I want 20% off. And just put a little smudge there.

• 33:32Speaker 03

  You can't get the discount.

• 33:33Conan O'Brien?

  Why not?

• 33:34Speaker 03

  Because he didn't lose it. He just, he's inconvenienced.

• 33:37Conan O'Brien?

  They don't know that. They see a guy come in with half a mustache. What do they know? Who's gonna challenge that? I challenge you? That looks freshly shaved? Not singed? I don't think anyone challenges that. Look, maybe I've gone too far. It's possible that I'm doing the exact wrong thing at this moment and that I'll pay for it.

• 33:59Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 34:00Conan O'Brien?

  Terribly, but I'm just glad he's okay.

• 34:03Speaker 03

  Oh, thanks. Thanks so much for your concern. You're so nice.

• 34:07Conan O'Brien?

  Uh...

• 34:07Speaker 03

  A gift.

• 34:08Conan O'Brien?

  Yes. How's Tac, specifically?

• 34:11Speaker 03

  Tac's fine. I don't know if it's this like stoic Soviet thing, but he's like, alright, we gotta fill this out. We gotta do like, he's sad about his guitars. He lost all his guitars, but one of his friends gave him one, which is really nice. But, you know, he's like worried about his random, he's like worried about his kettlebell that he got for Christmas. And he's like, God, I hope I find my kettlebell in the rubble. And I'm like, your kettlebell? We could just go get that right now. We could just go buy it.

• 34:43Speaker 02

  And am I not wrong? A kettlebell is the most likely to survive a fire.

• 34:46Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 34:46Speaker 03

  Yeah, that's why he's like, my kettlebell probably survived.

• 34:51Conan O'Brien?

  I hope my fireplace and iron survive.

• 34:53Speaker 02

  My anvil.

• 34:55Conan O'Brien?

  I hope my bowling ball survived.

• 35:00Conan O'Brien?

  My solid... Yeah. Well, you know what? I think he is, I mean, he's an incredibly cool guy, Tac.

• 35:06Speaker 03

  He is, he's very chill.

• 35:07Conan O'Brien?

  He's very chill and he's very cool and I love him. I admire him and I think he's a good partner to have in a situation like this.

• 35:15Speaker 03

  He is. He's very worried about me and the boys and how we're feeling and he's very sweet. And, you know, Oki's fine too. I know people were probably wondering, she's fine too. And she's also like really happy because my dad feeds her a lot of like people food. He'll make a whole meal just for Oki. And so she's like just lounging, the boys are lounging.

• 35:37Conan O'Brien?

  Your dog is having baked Alaska.

• 35:40Speaker 02

  Sushi.

• 35:41Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, sushi.

• 35:42Speaker 02

  I think it's incredible.

• 35:44Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 35:45Conan O'Brien?

  Cordon bleu, chicken cordon bleu.

• 35:48Speaker 03

  Oh, my God. So, yeah, Tac is, Tac is, Tac's really, he's, he's such a great person. He's such an incredible father and husband, and he's been really good. So, yeah, we're very lucky. We're very lucky. We're, I told girls this. I was like, we're the luckiest unlucky people because we, we have others we can turn to when we need to. So, we're very lucky.

• 36:10Speaker 02

  You've handled the aftermath too with just such humor and aplomb and honesty too with how you're feeling. It's amazing. You're, you're amazing.

• 36:17Speaker 03

  Oh, well, thank you.

• 36:19Speaker 02

  You're okay.

• 36:21Speaker 03

  I do think, I know there's going to be a point where I have to go like, see someone because I think I legit, every time I hear wind, I like tense up and it's really nerve wracking.

• 36:32Conan O'Brien?

  There's no way, I mean, so many people are going to have some form of PTSD or whatever you, however you want to classify it from this.

• 36:40Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 36:41Conan O'Brien?

  And so it is, as you know, I'm a huge proponent of, of it and I, I don't necessarily come from a people that are, were believers in talk therapy.

• 36:53Conan O'Brien?

  But, and I think Freud famously said, "The only people who are immune to psychotherapy are the Irish."

• 37:01Conan O'Brien?

  But I, but I do think it's hugely helpful.

• 37:05Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 37:05Conan O'Brien?

  It would be good for you and also talk to us about it.

• 37:07Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 37:08Conan O'Brien?

  You know?

• 37:09Speaker 03

  We, we are, we are a people, we, we're, we're in yell therapy, I think, Armenians, my, my people. But we let it all out. We're very much

• 37:19Conan O'Brien?

  That's very good.

• 37:20Speaker 03

  Getting it out and, and I'm lucky. I have a lot of friends who I just, I, you know, will talk to them or text them and I'll just tell them exactly how I feel and it's nice to have that comfort to be able to talk to people openly about it. Because, yeah, it is, this is probably, and it's also good, but this is probably, this is the hardest thing I've ever gone through.

• 37:40Conan O'Brien?

  Yep.

• 37:41Speaker 03

  And if this is the hardest thing I've ever gone through, then I've been lucky.

• 37:45Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 37:45Speaker 03

  Because it's, it's a, you know, I can rebuild, but other people have gone through so much worse. So, I'm, I'm lucky in that sense.

• 37:55Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. Well,

• 37:58Conan O'Brien?

  I

• 38:02Conan O'Brien?

  I'll say this, I have found today to be cathartic for me because I've been thinking about you a lot, Sona, and on a selfish level, I thought, I really want to get into a room with Sona. We've texted, we've talked on the phone, but I didn't see you until today, and I've just wanted you, I've wanted to be in a room with you and talk to you. And so this was weirdly, even though you're the one who's really been affected much more, a million times more than I was, a billion times more, this was really special for me to get to talk to you and tell you face to face that I love you, whatever you need,

• 38:46Conan O'Brien?

  we'll all get you through this. And we are a family, and I'm including, oh god, Gourley. Don't do it. I'm gonna do it, Adam, Eduardo, Blay, we are a family.

• 39:01Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 39:02Conan O'Brien?

  And also everyone who works here. And we, there was such a lovely outpouring, and I'm not gonna, online of people, fans, reaching out to wonder how we were doing, that was, just bowled me over. We are blessed, we're blessed a million times over with so many fans, so many people are rooting for you, Sona, and thinking about you, and you're gonna get through this with flying colors. And I am going to gradually work my way back into mocking and harassing you. It's gonna take a long time.

• 39:39Speaker 03

  It's not.

• 39:40Conan O'Brien?

  It's begun.

• 39:40Speaker 03

  It's not gonna take a long time.

• 39:42Conan O'Brien?

  You know, I just, no, I mean, when I see a long time, I mean, like, many hours.

• 39:45Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah, that's what I figured. I knew, I knew you were saying that.

• 39:48Conan O'Brien?

  The last hour doing it.

• 39:49Speaker 03

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 39:50Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, I was gonna say, is there really evidence? Oh, right, we do record these.

• 39:54Speaker 03

  I, can I, can I just say also, I'm really, really happy to come back to work, because I think this podcast has gotten me through, it's gotten me through COVID, it's gotten me through fertility treatments, and it's gonna get me through this. And I, I love being in this room and talking with you guys, and just, I love my, my job, and I'm very lucky that I get to have it. So, please don't fire me.

• 40:21Conan O'Brien?

  Well, you're really on the line.

• 40:25Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 40:25Speaker 02

  You saved it today.

• 40:27Conan O'Brien?

  You're you can you you're not fired today. But.

• 40:32Speaker 03

  God.

• 40:33Conan O'Brien?

  There's this.

• 40:34Speaker 02

  Awesome.

• 40:34Conan O'Brien?

  Very expensive electric bike I'm thinking of getting with company funds.

• 40:38Speaker 03

  Come on.

• 40:38Conan O'Brien?

  And that would mean there's no room for you.

• 40:42Conan O'Brien?

  Do I need this bike? No. But I kind of like it. Because it's a shade of cocoa that I find.

• 40:49Speaker 03

  Kind of like it.

• 40:50Conan O'Brien?

  I don't know what's wrong with me, but uh. Love you. We're back. We're going to continue to make our foolishness and update you on on. I mean, what is? This is we'll update you on.

• 41:03Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 41:03Conan O'Brien?

  Keep everyone listening and and how uh. How this process unfolds for you and uh. You know. We um. We're thinking not just of you, Sona, but everyone out there. Who's been affected by this and and to all the really incredible people. Who from all over the world that have reached out and been so lovely to us. We are blessed people.

• 41:28Speaker 03

  Yeah, and the firefighters.

• 41:30Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 41:31Speaker 03

  I mean.

• 41:32Conan O'Brien?

  It's unbelievable and our our own. Sarah Federovich, who works here.

• 41:36Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 41:37Conan O'Brien?

  Has been has been working for me for I want to say close to 30 years, if not 30 years. Her husband Brad. Help out there fighting these fires. And uh, so yeah, enough cannot be said about. We have a screwy value system. In our country where it's like, look, there's a celebrity and. Never has it looked more stupid. Our value system than right now. Uh, than when you see these people that really. Do put themselves in harm's way to.

• 42:12Conan O'Brien?

  Put save people's homes, save people's lives. It's absolutely incredible.

• 42:15Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 42:16Conan O'Brien?

  But boy, I can't wait till we get back to revering. Slip.

• 42:21Speaker 03

  Oh, God.

• 42:23Conan O'Brien?

  Look, a podcaster. He's the true hero.

• 42:29Conan O'Brien?

  You got that right, buddy.

• 42:32Conan O'Brien?

  Anyway, uh, everybody out there, stay safe, uh, and uh, thank you again for all of your. Uh, good wishes and positive energy.

• 42:44Speaker 02

  Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend with Conan O'Brien, Sona Afssesian and Matt Gourley. Produced by me, Matt Gourley. Executive produced by Adam Sachs, Jeff Ross and Nick Liao. Theme song by The White Stripes. Incidental music by Jimmy Vivino. Take it away Jimmy.

• 43:04Speaker 02

  Our supervising producer is Aaron Blair and our associate talent producer is Jennifer Samples. Engineering and mixing by Eduardo Perez and Brendan Burns. Additional production support by Mars Melnick. Talent booking by Paula Davis, Gina Batista and Britt Kahn. You can rate and review this show on Apple Podcasts and you might find your review read on a future episode. Got a question for Conan? Call the Team Coco hotline at 669-587-2847 and leave a message. It too could be featured on a future episode. You can also get three free months of SiriusXM when you sign up at siriusxm.com/conan. And if you haven't already, please subscribe to Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend wherever fine podcasts are downloaded.