Is it ever OK to comment on a postpartum body?

In today's episode: listeners share how they felt in their bodies postpartum, and why some compliments (although well-intentioned), felt very unwelcome. Thank you to Little One’s for making this episode of The Room possible! Get exceptional nappy performance at an Everyday Low Price, only available at Woolworths. The Room is produced by Dimity Kirkwood, video produced by Scott Walton and executive-produced by Lucy Hunt. Our social media team consists of Naima Fatema, Erin Taylor and Divya Simmie, and our partnerships managers are Tabitha Rachmat and Tahnee Malina. We're a new show, and the best way to support us is by clicking ‘follow’ on Apple and Spotify, and we're super grateful to anyone who leaves a five-star review while they're at it. Also! An old-fashioned 'Tell a Friend In Real Life' is equally appreciated. You can follow The Room on Instagram and TikTok. Follow our hosts on Instagram here: Freya, Rafa and Georgia. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:02Speaker 00

  Welcome to The Room, where mothers meet to share their inner world. We're your hosts, Rafa Husain.

• 0:08Freya Bleathman?

  I'm Freya Bleathman.

• 0:09Georgia Allison?

  And I'm Georgia Allison.

• 0:10Speaker 00

  Welcome back, everyone. Happy Thursday. For anyone that's joining us for the first time, or have listened to us over the last week, we've got two episodes a week. So Tuesday's episode this week was around our census sort of start, focused around postpartum bodies and JLP ones. And today, we've got a follow-up mailbag episode. So the mailbag episodes are sort of around our audience members asking us questions or additional thoughts. So we absolutely love hearing from you all, so please keep it coming. Today's topic is around the tricky reality of living in a postpartum body. So Tuesday's episode was huge. It was a big one.

• 0:49Georgia Allison?

  It was very meaty.

• 0:50Speaker 00

  I think, yeah, we've probably got a lot of comments from our audience around how they felt. And yeah, we're gonna deep dive into a few today.

• 1:00Georgia Allison?

  And before we dive in, this episode of The Room is brought to you by Little Ones. Exceptional nappy performance at an everyday low price. Only available at Woolworths.

• 1:10Freya Bleathman?

  Shall we start with a win or a loss before we get into today's topic?

• 1:14Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 1:14Georgia Allison?

  Yeah.

• 1:15Speaker 00

  Got a bit of a loss, to be honest. I feel like, I mean, it's a light loss, I would say. Yesterday was a beautiful sunny day and...

• 1:22Georgia Allison?

  If you're here in Melbourne, finally, spring is springing.

• 1:24Speaker 00

  Yeah, it was so nice.

• 1:28Speaker 00

  I was out for what I thought was a hot girl walk. I was like out in the park, it's sunny, it's on, coffee in hand, and I was on the way to the gym. And then halfway through the walk, I'm like, oh, the cramps have started. I'm like, that can't be my period. It's early. Why is this happening? And I've had my period for about a year. I got it pretty quickly after my second birth, which was a bit annoying.

• 1:51Georgia Allison?

  Very rude.

• 1:52Speaker 00

  And I've heard that it's meant to get better. Like, I've always had pretty painful and heavy periods throughout my life. More painful and less heavy. And now the opposite has happened, where it is extremely heavy. Like, I'm going through super tampons, super pads, like, every couple of hours. But the pain's kind of dissipating. I know.

• 2:11Freya Bleathman?

  You should see the doctor.

• 2:14Freya Bleathman?

  This is not medical advice, but...

• 2:16Speaker 00

  Get your eye checked. I probably need to. Okay, thank you, doc.

• 2:20Georgia Allison?

  Oh my gosh, so God prayers here.

• 2:22Speaker 00

  But the loss is, how to, like, you know, every woman will relate. You're like out for a walk and then it hits. And then I'm like awkwardly walking slash running through the park. I'm 15 minutes away from the gym, sprinting and then running into the gym. And it's fucking everywhere. So thankfully, I know, I know. I would say that that's my loss. So, you know, this is my first time being in a public sort of media-facing role with the period, and that's why I'm in my comfy.

• 2:51Georgia Allison?

  Well, you're wearing it well.

• 2:52Freya Bleathman?

  This is a huge moment. Rafa is currently menstruating.

• 2:57Georgia Allison?

  Whoever is listening to this in their car is currently menstruating. You're not alone.

• 3:02Freya Bleathman?

  We're for all women.

• 3:04Speaker 00

  All women.

• 3:06Freya Bleathman?

  Any stage of your cycle.

• 3:07Speaker 00

  I'm in my comfy, so this is my, yeah.

• 3:10Georgia Allison?

  You look so chic in your comfy.

• 3:12Speaker 00

  I mean, my comfy track is that work-facing, but anyways, with a loss, that's me.

• 3:18Freya Bleathman?

  Well, maybe I'll do a win.

• 3:19Georgia Allison?

  Yeah, go on.

• 3:20Freya Bleathman?

  And it's kind of related to Rafa's in the sense that I've just started going to the gym postpartum.

• 3:26Georgia Allison?

  Oh, wow, well done.

• 3:27Freya Bleathman?

  This is like the Room lore. Rafa and I go to the same gym and have...

• 3:32Speaker 00

  So we were working out probably for a whole year together.

• 3:35Georgia Allison?

  Without knowing each other.

• 3:37Speaker 00

  Without knowing each other, or in the same classes.

• 3:39Freya Bleathman?

  But I feel, I feel like we couldn't have possibly been in the same classes, because I think I would have noticed you. Like...

• 3:46Georgia Allison?

  I would have been checking her out.

• 3:48Freya Bleathman?

  I'm getting a bit, like, sick of that.

• 3:51Freya Bleathman?

  But like, the other day, I caught up with you at the gym and I walked in, I was like, oh. Like, you just look so beautiful. And I think you just started hot mat Pilates. So like, given, like, you were sweating.

• 4:04Speaker 00

  You're fully making me blush. That is so nice.

• 4:06Freya Bleathman?

  I think I would have noticed you. I feel like, anyway, the invisible string theory.

• 4:11Georgia Allison?

  We need to have a Room excursion to this drink. It sounds awesome.

• 4:14Freya Bleathman?

  I know. Honestly, my apartment's always open.

• 4:17Speaker 00

  How are you feeling working out?

• 4:18Freya Bleathman?

  Eight people in, you put your apartment and two dogs, but always welcome. I'm like the biggest, my dream in life is to live in a little commune with my friends, so.

• 4:26Georgia Allison?

  In an apartment building, that would be so gorgeous.

• 4:28Speaker 00

  That would be so fun.

• 4:29Freya Bleathman?

  The working out, the working out, Rafa.

• 4:31Speaker 00

  Yeah, you're feeling good?

• 4:32Freya Bleathman?

  Uh, do you know why? It's actually nice, because for the first time, maybe not the first time, but I really, the gym is like my time. I'm excited to go to the gym, whereas it was always a little bit of a, you know, I have to do that to stay strong and be healthy and blah, blah, blah. Whereas now I'm like, ooh, I'm ready to go, yeah, leave. I do it on days where my husband's working from home during Goldie's naps. So I like rush over there and see if I can do a class or do some gym floor. And I'm so weak. It's a little bit demoralising. Like, there are, I don't know, I think I just need to work through this. I feel like I want to like go into the gym wearing a little badge saying that I've just had a baby and that's why I can't do anything.

• 5:11Speaker 00

  Exactly.

• 5:12Freya Bleathman?

  But I think I just need to be like, you know what, like, there's a million different reasons why people are strong or not strong at a particular time. So, but yeah, I'm like, I'm doing a bit of Pilates and I'm sort of the very first stage that they do and then build on. I'm like, under that.

• 5:27Speaker 00

  Yeah, I've been going back for about seven months now, since having Lila. And I will say, it returns so quickly. So if you just stay at it, where you can grab those moments for yourself.

• 5:43Freya Bleathman?

  Because I didn't exercise during, because I was so sick during pregnancy, I didn't really go at all.

• 5:47Speaker 00

  For that time as well.

• 5:48Freya Bleathman?

  Yeah, so I've not done much for, like, over a year.

• 5:51Speaker 00

  Yeah, I am, I was really weak after the sort of two back-to-back pregnancies. And last week, I did all the advanced spring settings for the really hard Pilates class. And I felt such an immense sense of achievement.

• 6:08Freya Bleathman?

  I don't think I've ever even pre-parted.

• 6:09Speaker 00

  For being able to do all of them. And I just gave myself the challenge. I was like, just try.

• 6:13Georgia Allison?

  See how you go.

• 6:14Speaker 00

  Because I always just sit around the beginner springs and blah, blah, blah. I was like, I think I can do it. It fully killed me. I was dying. But the trainer came up to me, she's like, I am so impressed that you are doing that within six months of, because she's kind of been with me on the journey since the return. And I felt like such a sense of achievement. So similarly to you, six months ago, I was like, I want the badge of honour of being like, I've just had a baby and that's why I'm doing the beginner and I'm on my knees for all the planks and blah, blah, blah. And now to be a little bit further ahead on that journey, it's just, it's a nice sense of achievement. I think if nothing else, we're gonna go into this, right? We're talking about postpartum bodies.

• 6:52Georgia Allison?

  The perfect segue.

• 6:52Speaker 00

  How to look after yourself, whether it's for your own self-care, mental health, or for weight loss. There's so many different benefits, I think, for moving your body. So, well done.

• 7:04Georgia Allison?

  Yeah, well done.

• 7:05Freya Bleathman?

  Quick win, Georgia, or loss?

• 7:07Georgia Allison?

  It's a bit of a both, really. This week in, at least in Melbourne, I don't know where, I'm gonna talk about the win and, win and loss being daylight savings. In general, win is that last night, we went, took my family after childcare to get fish and chips in the park.

• 7:25Freya Bleathman?

  So we, and daylight savings, we went forward.

• 7:29Georgia Allison?

  We did. We went forward an hour. So we've got more daylight in that very sweet spot. When you've finished work, pick up the kids from childcare, you've just got more.

• 7:37Speaker 00

  It's a beautiful day or an evening.

• 7:39Georgia Allison?

  So got fish and chips in the park, we rode our cargo bike. I've got like this electric bike that has a big cargo square at the front. So it's a three-wheel sort of tricycle, but it's got...

• 7:50Speaker 00

  Like a trailer?

• 7:51Georgia Allison?

  Yeah, but it's at the front. So if you can imagine, and I can show you a photo. But it's like a big box in the middle and it's got the handlebars and it's three wheels. But it's, it's powered by a battery and it's necessary. So piled the boys in it. Matt was riding it and I'm actually in it as well, so.

• 8:13Speaker 00

  This is amazing.

• 8:14Georgia Allison?

  It was just like, I couldn't have bothered getting my bike out. So I was just like, it's got one of those, it's got four seats. They sort of face each other. It's like, you know, almost like a train carriage, two seats facing each other. I've got three kids. For anyone who doesn't know, they are triplets, triplet boys. And there's a fourth seat. So here I just squashed in and we got our fish and chips and went to the park.

• 8:36Speaker 00

  Well, how nice is that?

• 8:37Georgia Allison?

  Yeah, it was. And the loss is that it's daylight savings and my kids are still waiting. But I don't know what it is. Like, we've gone forward an hour, but yeah, 5.30.

• 8:45Speaker 00

  Why do they wake up earlier? That's the thing I can't understand.

• 8:48Georgia Allison?

  Doesn't make sense.

• 8:50Speaker 00

  Is it because we're putting them down earlier, I think? I don't know. Anyways, it is a win and a loss. There are so many things you just can't predict about having a baby. Will they arrive on their due date? Will they sleep well? What will their personality be like? While you can't predict these things, as a mum of two under two, I can predict that you'll be going through a lot of nappies. That's why I love Little Ones. They've got great absorbency to keep your baby feeling dry, plus targeted leak protection. Because let's be real, leaks can happen anywhere, at any time, as we all know so well.

• 9:21Georgia Allison?

  Yeah, we do.

• 9:22Speaker 00

  As a mum of two, there's already a never-ending mountain of laundry to get on top of. So having confidence that my little ones will stay dry for longer and I won't have to worry about any unexpected outfit changes is more than worth it. They're available in sizes one to seven, and the best part is that they won't break the family budget. Plus, they also have a range of wipes. The extra-large wipes are super handy for the inevitable messes that come with being a parent. Shop Little Ones nappies and wipes at Woolworths. And thank you so much to Little Ones for making this episode of The Room possible.

• 9:52Freya Bleathman?

  Shall we hear from listener, let's call her Anne? I had a full-term pregnancy and an emergency cesarean three months before my wedding. The wedding was planned, the baby slash pregnancy was not. I was adamant to get back to my old body because I wanted to feel like myself on our wedding day. I went to a women's physio to help with scar tissue and build my core strength. I realised I felt foreign in my own body. Veiny boobs, milk leaks, stretch marks and a big scar.

• 10:18Georgia Allison?

  Hard relate.

• 10:19Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 10:20Freya Bleathman?

  The veiny boobs really surprised me. They were wobbly. I was gonna say, I feel like I could cannulated my boob veins. Like, they were juicy. I'd like sometimes press on them and be like, oh.

• 10:32Georgia Allison?

  Sometimes I sort of liked it, though. I sort of, I've never really had big boobs or anything.

• 10:36Freya Bleathman?

  Oh, the sores of veins or something.

• 10:37Georgia Allison?

  Yeah, I don't know, I sort of didn't mind that either.

• 10:42Georgia Allison?

  Watching my body become a superhero.

• 10:45Speaker 00

  Absolutely.

• 10:46Freya Bleathman?

  Body positivity goals.

• 10:49Georgia Allison?

  Uh, so about one month before the wedding, my baby had his first cold and was really unwell. But luckily he recovered within a week. During that week, I didn't think once about my body. I had a light bulb moment. Why do I care so much about something that doesn't matter? My baby's health matters, my health matters. I'm a couple of months postpartum, grow easy on yourself. Two years on, I still have moments where I'd love to be stronger in my body. But I've come to love this new identity in the body that comes with it. The body that was able to grow and sustain the life of a child.

• 11:20Speaker 00

  Go girl.

• 11:21Georgia Allison?

  Yeah, love this insight and perspective here.

• 11:24Freya Bleathman?

  First of all, three months postpartum, the expectation, like.

• 11:29Speaker 00

  I cannot imagine.

• 11:30Freya Bleathman?

  Yeah.

• 11:31Georgia Allison?

  It was a recipe for disaster, having your wedding three months.

• 11:34Speaker 00

  But like, you were completely.

• 11:36Freya Bleathman?

  The rawness of that, yeah.

• 11:38Georgia Allison?

  The bounce back, like the bounce back culture times the wedding culture, like.

• 11:42Speaker 00

  Yeah. I could, I, can we do an episode on weddings or something? I have so many thoughts.

• 11:49Freya Bleathman?

  Yeah, absolutely. But I mean, I get, I get what she means, cause it's, I know the times that I've had wobbles. Postpartum has been when there's been photos, like even doing the shoot for this show, for the promo. I really, I just, you know, I was like, something I have to do, but I wasn't looking forward to it. I wasn't looking forward to seeing the photos. And a wedding is kind of like that on steroids. Like there's not just the photographer taking photos of you, but everyone else.

• 12:14Georgia Allison?

  And you're on show.

• 12:15Freya Bleathman?

  Yeah.

• 12:16Georgia Allison?

  And as you want to be, you wanna look your best on the wedding day, like I'm.

• 12:19Freya Bleathman?

  And you probably are, you know, looking and doing, working towards it. But if you're postpartum and, you know, it sounds like they're breastfeeding and things like that.

• 12:27Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 12:27Freya Bleathman?

  Ugh, I mean, I totally can relate to how she would have been feeling like that. Um, but you just, I mean, I, I still have quite a lot of, like giving myself a lot of grace.

• 12:38Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 12:39Georgia Allison?

  Yeah.

• 12:39Freya Bleathman?

  Postpartum, like I'm eight months postpartum.

• 12:41Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 12:42Freya Bleathman?

  So twelve weeks.

• 12:43Speaker 00

  And that's the, that's such a good word, grace, just for women, experiences, everything that you're going through. I'm so glad that she was able to get to that light bulb moment. Cause I couldn't even imagine, honestly, that pressure that you would have felt to feel and look good. When we not all know what three months feels postpartum. That, that period is so insane, there's so much going on. Um, so yeah, I think that whole notion that being grateful for what the body can do. Stain a child, grow it, like I'm so glad that that happened pre, um, and I hope she had an amazing day.

• 13:19Georgia Allison?

  Yeah, I know, I wanna, I wanna know more.

• 13:21Speaker 00

  Yeah, I wanna know more and yeah, how, how.

• 13:24Freya Bleathman?

  How does she breastfeed in a wedding dress?

• 13:25Speaker 00

  Yeah, feeding or looking after the kid.

• 13:28Freya Bleathman?

  I hope she had a photo of she did, that's gorgeous.

• 13:30Georgia Allison?

  I also just love the fact that she's now concentrating, like moving forward. She's, how, how long did she say she's?

• 13:35Speaker 00

  Two years.

• 13:35Georgia Allison?

  Two years postpartum. And the language around her body is a bit like, body positive. She's talking about how she wants to feel stronger and, um, rather than smaller, skinnier, which is sort of the words that I'm sort of seeing heaps a lot. And, um, you know, the GLP one usage.

• 13:53Freya Bleathman?

  A hundred percent, and I totally, I mean, I don't even know if it's body positive or it's just kind of body neutral. And as far as appearance goes, which is really my goal a lot of the time.

• 14:04Georgia Allison?

  Well, if you've got a two year old, you sort of wanna be strong because that's, yeah, if you're gonna chase after, um, you know, a two year old that's most likely walking. Then you really need to have your strength.

• 14:14Speaker 00

  Yeah, absolutely. And I think that's kind of, um, that mirrors how I've been sort of thinking about exercise and the return to exercise. As, you know, people know, like when you go from, we're in our experience, zero to one, I felt like I was able to go to the gym a little bit and here and there. You know, making that work when you've got two or multiples is, gets harder and harder. And so the reason I exercise is not for weight loss anymore, it's for self-care and mental health and stress relief for now. Like it has a completely different role in my life. Um, so yeah, and it is around, you know, trying to stay strong and like strong for my kids and being fit for my kids.

• 14:52Georgia Allison?

  Yeah, and I feel like that comes with the perspective that she's sort of talking about here. She's gone through a bit of a health dip with her son and she's come out thinking like, who cares about what I look like on my wedding day? Um, you know, I'm marrying hopefully the love of my life.

• 15:05Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 15:06Georgia Allison?

  I'm gonna have a great day, I've got my, my child here and our health is the most important.

• 15:11Speaker 00

  Yeah, well done.

• 15:12Georgia Allison?

  Yeah.

• 15:12Speaker 00

  Lots to take on and even acknowledging our day to days, I think, from that perspective.

• 15:18Georgia Allison?

  Before we get on to the next mailbag, let's hear from today's sponsor. If you're a parent, you'll know the difference between a wet nappy and a very wet nappy. And you've probably become unexpectedly passionate about absorbency. Little ones' nappies are made for and tested by parents like you and are designed for up to 12 hours absorbency and have targeted leak protection. They also have a range of wipes, like the extra large wipes, perfect for those unavoidable messes that come with parenthood. You can grab little ones' nappies and wipes at your local Woolworths and thank you so much to little ones for making this episode of The Room possible.

• 15:54Freya Bleathman?

  Georgia, do you wanna read our mailbag?

• 15:56Georgia Allison?

  I've recently had a baby, I'm 12 weeks postpartum and have been really surprised by the comments I've received about my body after giving birth. They've been positive, people remarking that I've bounced back so quickly or don't look like I've had a baby. These are lovely comments in theory and I know the intention behind them is good, but every comment makes my stomach plummet. I feel so exposed, like they can see the deep anxiety I'm feeling that's reducing my appetite. Or the meals that I've missed because my baby only sleeps in my arms. And I can't bear putting her down at the risk of waking her up. The anxiety I've felt postpartum has truly taken me by surprise. I think a lot of people of our listeners can probably relate to this, I was surprised as well.

• 16:42Georgia Allison?

  I never dealt with intrusive thoughts before having a baby and the way I've been rattled has absolutely changed how much I am able to eat. I've heard people describe it as an internal alarm system and that's super accurate for me. It constantly feels like an alarm is going off and it's very common for me to get to four P M and realise I haven't eaten a thing. And have been surviving off coffees all morning and all afternoon. To make matters worse, I snapped at my mother-in-law two weeks ago and things have been very frosty ever since. I know she meant well, she complimented me on my outfit and said how wonderful it was that my tummy was already looking back to normal. But in that moment, I felt observed, like I was in a zoo or something, or like I was on display.

• 17:25Georgia Allison?

  And everyone has been watching my body to see what happens to it in postpartum. I was quite cold with her and I said, maybe let's not do that. Other family members were there to watch the whole thing and things got a bit awkward. I get that it's an easy conversation starter and it also feels like a compliment, but it feels also the absolute opposite. Should I text my mother-in-law and apologise or is she the one who should be apologising to me?

• 17:52Speaker 00

  Ew.

• 17:52Georgia Allison?

  Ooh.

• 17:54Freya Bleathman?

  I mean, there's a lot, a lot to unpack there. First of all, I just wanna give her a big hug and get a, like a dinner lady's photo and come and do the night shift to her.

• 18:03Georgia Allison?

  And also feed her, make sure that she's feeding her.

• 18:06Speaker 00

  Dual support.

• 18:07Georgia Allison?

  Yeah.

• 18:07Freya Bleathman?

  Literally, I know.

• 18:08Georgia Allison?

  Yeah.

• 18:09Freya Bleathman?

  I have twelve weeks.

• 18:10Speaker 00

  Oh gosh, there's so much to relate to those early weeks and, you know, as we all know, that first time you're having a baby. The transition to becoming a mother or parents is so intense. There's something so primal and that instinct, the maternal instinct that like really kicks in about keeping a baby like alive.

• 18:28Georgia Allison?

  Yeah.

• 18:29Speaker 00

  Is so intense, so that alarm system, like I definitely feel like I had a bit of that and.

• 18:35Freya Bleathman?

  Well, I think they've, it's biological, I think the centres of your brain that process kind of fight, flight, fear, the amygdala, your kind of lizard brain. Gets bigger.

• 18:46Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 18:47Freya Bleathman?

  I mean, that's how you survive as a species, you have to be on the lookout.

• 18:51Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 18:51Freya Bleathman?

  I guess the flip side is the anxiety.

• 18:54Speaker 00

  It can create, like, where does that anxiety, what's normal? And then where's like actual anxious, yeah, behaviour.

• 19:01Georgia Allison?

  Yeah.

• 19:02Speaker 00

  Is so, so full on, so I think there were a couple of, you know, days, um, initially where, you know, if my partner and I were tag teaming on naps. When the kids are napping and things like that, that both of us would probably forget to eat, um, in those like really, really early weeks. But that's where we got a chance to really lean on the support of our village to kind of go, oh, I've realised we're not sustaining or nourishing ourselves. And then, um, Will definitely took the role, my husband, on like the meal training or like single, single, like, um, handed snacks. Like anytime I was gonna sit down, I had triple feeding for the first eight weeks. Anytime I sat down for a breastfeeding session, it was gonna be like a forty five minute to fifty minute session.

• 19:42Freya Bleathman?

  That.

• 19:43Speaker 00

  How intense is those early, yeah.

• 19:45Freya Bleathman?

  It makes me cringe thinking about all the feeding plans, like if parents, if babies weren't gaining enough weight or whatever. And you're like, okay, so feed three hourly and then after you've fed, pump, blah, blah, blah. I'm like, that gives like one hour.

• 19:58Speaker 00

  Yeah, sometimes thirty minutes between feeds, you know? And it is that truly like full time job of like, you know, overnight, it's such, it's so good. For anyone that doesn't know what triple feeding is, it means you're breastfeeding to start, to try and get them on the boob. Then you pump because they might have struggles latching and things like that.

• 20:18Freya Bleathman?

  Um, and often to boost your supply.

• 20:20Speaker 00

  To boost your supply and then you follow up with a bottle feed and you're doing that anywhere between ten to fifteen times a day. Sometimes more in those early weeks, um, until you can figure out the latch or how to work, make breastfeeding work, if that's something that you wanna go through.

• 20:35Freya Bleathman?

  Hard enough with one baby.

• 20:36Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 20:36Georgia Allison?

  I know, I was gonna say, I. I have a lot to say about this. Triple feeding, um, triplets is no joke, or just even twins, any multiple, um, parents listening.

• 20:47Freya Bleathman?

  I wonder what the breastfeeding rates would be, cause they're, you know, it's so hard with one baby.

• 20:53Georgia Allison?

  Yeah.

• 20:53Freya Bleathman?

  I'm, I was shocked when you said you breastfed.

• 20:55Georgia Allison?

  Yeah, I'm reflecting on it, I'm a little bit shocked too, but, I mean, I think we've touched on this, um, off mic, but it was just one thing that I could control, like so much of my pregnancy was out of my control. I was so grateful to be pregnant, was not expecting it to be triplets. My birth plan of, you know, potentially at least trying for a vaginal birth was pretty much thrown out the window when the third baby was found. Like, I know lots of twi- uh, twin parents um, have a vaginal birth really successfully. That's just not on the cards when you've got, you know, preemie babies and there's three of them. Um, and it just was one of those weird things that I just had like this real control over. I wanted to give it a go.

• 21:39Freya Bleathman?

  Hmm.

• 21:40Georgia Allison?

  And so I did, and I was very grateful in terms of being able to build a supply.

• 21:45Freya Bleathman?

  Hmm.

• 21:45Georgia Allison?

  But like I, like you heard in my episode zero, that meant that I was pumping, um, breast milk for like every forty five minutes as soon as they were born. And that continued throughout, um, my breastfeeding journey. Like I pumped until they were nine months old, but I exclusively breastfed all three of them until they were five months. When they weaned themselves off the breast and I was spewing, but they just liked the bottle so much more.

• 22:11Freya Bleathman?

  Gold's is the same. It's funny, I really relate to what you were saying about it being one thing you can control. Like, I really felt like that with Goldie, cause I prescribed formula all the time and I was, you know, if she needs it, she needs it.

• 22:23Georgia Allison?

  Yeah.

• 22:24Freya Bleathman?

  When she came out, I think because of the car crash and the, like, it's probably misplaced, but the guilt over her coming prematurely, I was like, I just wanna do this one thing.

• 22:34Georgia Allison?

  Hmm.

• 22:35Freya Bleathman?

  To help her, that has these health benefits.

• 22:38Georgia Allison?

  And that you can only do, you know, like it's, it's a bit primal in that way.

• 22:41Freya Bleathman?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 22:42Speaker 00

  Do you think that ties into what our listener has said around anxiety felt in those early twelve weeks?

• 22:48Georgia Allison?

  Absolutely. There, there has been so much of what this listener wrote in that I have identified with.

• 22:53Freya Bleathman?

  I thought of you, Georgia, yeah.

• 22:54Georgia Allison?

  I, I think to, to begin with, the posi- positive comments that she's receiving almost feel like backhanded in a way. I think, um, I received some of those comments. I, um, you know, pretty much went back to the same size, um, as I was pre-kids, um, really, really quickly.

• 23:15Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 23:15Georgia Allison?

  Post having the boys, um, and we touched on this on episode, uh, on Tuesday, but that is rooted in genetics. It was the same for my mum. We, the weight did fall off me while I was breastfeeding.

• 23:27Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 23:27Georgia Allison?

  I couldn't eat enough. I also really relate to the idea of, even though so many people provided me meals, like I had an incredible village and still do, to this day have an incredible village of people who, um, gave us meals in those early days. I've still got family friends who sometimes like, ah, I'm gonna drop a meal over. Um, yeah. And I'm like, great, thanks.

• 23:47Freya Bleathman?

  I mean, like, with how much energy you burn when you're breastfeeding, can you tell the listeners how much breast milk? This is like my favourite fact.

• 23:55Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 23:55Freya Bleathman?

  How much breast milk you pumped today?

• 23:57Georgia Allison?

  Oh my gosh, I know. Well, as a lot of our listeners will know, you know, pumping is to also build up a supply. I wanted my body to know that it had three babies, so I pumped, um, with the recommendation from like the midwives all throughout, um, my time that I was separated for them, with, from them. They were in the NICU and special care nursery for thirty two days and they weren't able to do a breastfeed for a few of those days. So I was just pumping and then putting the milk aside in the, um, freezer. Um, Matt was the keeper of like this log, this breastfeeding log to ensure that I was able to increase the amount I was pumping per day. So then supply would just, my body would know.

• 24:42Georgia Allison?

  That at its highest, um, during that period, outside of my breastfeed, so what I was, um, giving them directly from the breast, because of course I couldn't measure that, how much they were getting. Outside of that, I was pumping three litres of breast milk per day.

• 24:59Freya Bleathman?

  It's just like.

• 25:00Speaker 00

  Let's just look at that ginormous three litre. I buy a three litre that lasts us five days, you know, food to go. I'm looking at the carton of milk.

• 25:09Georgia Allison?

  I don't, that was a little sick.

• 25:11Speaker 00

  A shitload of milk.

• 25:13Georgia Allison?

  I know, it was. It was like.

• 25:16Speaker 00

  Unbelievable.

• 25:18Georgia Allison?

  When we left the hospital, I had to, all of the milk was frozen.

• 25:22Freya Bleathman?

  Yeah.

• 25:22Georgia Allison?

  Um, and then had to be thawed by the, uh, midwives and I came home with a lot of milk. So I had a, we actually get, we had to get a chest freezer.

• 25:31Speaker 00

  No doubt.

• 25:32Georgia Allison?

  Not just for my breast milk, but for my amazing village, who gave me so much food. But yeah, it was like, I had to get all of these sort of, um, you know, like Coles and Woolworths bags with the insulated bits in, inside of it to take it home.

• 25:48Speaker 00

  My gosh.

• 25:48Georgia Allison?

  I could go straight back into a freezer.

• 25:50Freya Bleathman?

  Mm-hmm.

• 25:51Georgia Allison?

  It was.

• 25:51Speaker 00

  Well done. You are mum goals. And I know that, that probably would have been such a blur of time. Like, you probably can't remember the details, you know, being a few years on, but.

• 26:01Georgia Allison?

  Hmm, I know. I mean, this podcast really brings out some of those memories. And this, this.

• 26:06Speaker 00

  Done.

• 26:06Georgia Allison?

  Thank you, thank you. I'm, I, I do feel proud about it and, um, I'm glad it's something that I was able to control and be able to do for the boys. But also, equally, when, uh, they weaned themselves, I was more than ready for them to get into some formula.

• 26:23Speaker 00

  But I think to your point around that, the three litres, just going back to that, you dropped weight.

• 26:29Georgia Allison?

  I did.

• 26:29Speaker 00

  During breast, and now, like, that makes so much sense.

• 26:32Georgia Allison?

  Yeah.

• 26:32Speaker 00

  Because.

• 26:33Georgia Allison?

  Of course.

• 26:33Speaker 00

  The effort and sheer, like, you know, whatever your body was taking, you know, taking out. Like, I'm sure even you said you were ravenous, you were eating.

• 26:43Georgia Allison?

  I was eating, but I was still losing it. And I, I didn't touch on this, but thank you for bringing it up, Rafa. I actually had postpartum thyroiditis, which is a condition where I was sort of, my thyroid, I never actually had to go on to medication for this. But my bloods are still being monitored. So four years on, I still have regular bloods taken to see where my hormones are sitting. Because I was always, um, toeing the line for that hyper.

• 27:10Freya Bleathman?

  Hypothyroidism.

• 27:10Georgia Allison?

  Hypothyroidism, thank you.

• 27:12Freya Bleathman?

  Which is like the thyroid hormone production is ramped up and that's a big part of your kind of metabolism and energy.

• 27:21Speaker 00

  No wonder.

• 27:21Georgia Allison?

  Yeah.

• 27:23Freya Bleathman?

  Production.

• 27:24Georgia Allison?

  Absolutely. And one of the symptoms of that is weight loss. Um, I didn't have any of the other symptoms like manic, um, uh, manic thoughts or hyp- uh, I had a little bit, like I said, toe the line of, um, my heart rate increasing. But, um, yeah, I got these positive comments about my body, um, really early days. So early that it took, this, this, this mailbag took me back to a time where I was actually separated from my sons, obviously, cause they were in thirty two day. They were in the NICU for thirty two days. And I remember it was around Christmas time and went to a function with my family

• 28:03Georgia Allison?

  without my children. It took a lot for me to go there because I really didn't love being out and about in that time without them. Like, I wanted to be in the hospital. And going to this family function, lots of people saying like, oh my god, as if you've had triplets. Look at you, you look amazing. Um, you, you don't even look like you've had them. And it really like made my stomach plummet. Using her phrasing here, because I was like, I'm so separated from them. Like, if anything, I wanna look like I fucking had three kids. Like, I really did. And I know it was from a place of, they meant well, they absolutely meant well, but um, if I'm honest with, if I'm honest with myself, it made me feel shit.

• 28:46Speaker 00

  Yeah, I think it ties in to people wanting to connect with postpartum mums and really struggling to know what to say and do. And, um, they don't see the fact that you were a shell of a human at that stage and the pumping that you were doing. That would have been right around that time, right? That you're going to dysfunction, but you've pumped like for eight hours that day.

• 29:09Georgia Allison?

  Quickly take myself into a room at this family function to keep that going.

• 29:13Speaker 00

  Yeah, so no one sees that. So totally relate, and I'm sure you do more than anything, like that feeling like you're on display to what the mailbag said.

• 29:21Georgia Allison?

  Yes.

• 29:22Freya Bleathman?

  I'd be interested to know both of your experiences. This listener said, uh, she, with the anxiety postpartum and she was really unfamiliar with that feeling. How, like, how did you feel postpartum, Raph, as far as anxiety went?

• 29:37Speaker 00

  Um, I think it was definitely present and, you know, touching on that earlier stage around that primal instinct.

• 29:45Georgia Allison?

  Hmm.

• 29:46Speaker 00

  Um, perhaps because we had done the confinement, well, I certainly did that confinement thing where I kind of cancelled all plans. Like, for the first month, I was just like, you know, coffees can wait, walks can wait, all that sort of stuff. I just need to get to know this baby and figure things out. And I also wanted to maximize the time that my husband and I were on parental leave together. And he only had, um, four weeks. So.

• 30:11Georgia Allison?

  Yep.

• 30:11Speaker 00

  I say only, it's probably, you know, above average, but, um, for me, it felt like a little amount of time. So I was like, I just wanna soak up all this, yeah. All this time up together and figure, figure this out. So, um, that support from family around, um, siblings being close by, all of that really helped. And so I was able to pretty quickly figure out what was anxiety, um, and then what was my own stuff versus just like a normal reaction. Um, and because we live in such close proximity to my family, like, we have to get, like, I had to get very comfortable with other people holding the baby very quickly, other people around. It's just the way the intergenerational, I live with my mum.

• 30:56Speaker 00

  Um, and so our family's all in the house. We kind of had to pretty quickly get used to other people being in and around. And I also think that helped, like, me adapt to other people's thoughts. Like, I trust my family that, that sometimes even more than I trust myself. So, um, that kind of alleviated a lot of that anxiety and just being able to kind of go. Other people are here to help.

• 31:19Georgia Allison?

  What about you, Freya?

• 31:21Freya Bleathman?

  Um, well, unlike the listener, I am very familiar with anxiety. I've got, I've got anxiety. Um, and actually, most of it historically has been around work stuff. I'm sure the healthcare girlies will relate. I, I went on anxiety medications during my specialty exams and I've stayed on them. I didn't wanna come off them during pregnancy because I didn't wanna flare.

• 31:47Georgia Allison?

  Yeah.

• 31:47Freya Bleathman?

  Um, I felt, it's funny, I felt okay postpartum. I saw a psych mainly actually to work through some of the car accidents.

• 31:56Georgia Allison?

  Yeah, I'm glad you did that.

• 31:58Freya Bleathman?

  Yeah, and the anxiety and guilt around that. But she diagnosed me with postpartum anxiety.

• 32:04Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 32:04Freya Bleathman?

  Which I, I don't know, I still think it was just like a, I don't know, what's the difference between postpartum and just normal anxiety flaring up?

• 32:11Speaker 00

  Are they different medications or is it kinda similar?

• 32:13Freya Bleathman?

  Yeah, so I, I increased the dose of my medication that I was on. I'm still on that higher dose, I probably could drop it back down because I'm feeling pretty good now. But I, I relate to what you were saying, Raf, about having family around and a village. And, and you two, George, are really helping because my family live interstate. And it was kind of me and my husband. And I had, I think, like we spoke about in episode zero, I had a splint immobilizing my right hand from the car accident. So trying to learn to change nappies and things. I had a pren, pren baby, I was triple feeding, she didn't sleep well. And sleep is my basic, like, sleep for my anxiety management is a huge thing.

• 32:53Freya Bleathman?

  So I felt, I think in hindsight, pretty dreadful. I, I think it kind of peaked six weeks postpartum. I managed to kinda skate through okay with the day three blues and all of those sorts of things. I think it was just on adrenaline.

• 33:08Georgia Allison?

  Yeah.

• 33:08Freya Bleathman?

  More than anything else. Um, but the other thing I think that really manifested for me was, uh, in particular, death anxiety. And fear of, most of me, dying. And what that would mean for my daughter. And I, I felt like I had so much now to miss out on if I died. And I just, I mean, it is something that I'm still sort of grappling with a little bit. But I think that's how it really manifested. Like, I'd get these kind of existential sort of dread moments. And I feel like my world, it was a panic attack, I guess, in hindsight. My world was closing in inside me if I thought about it, which I thought about constantly.

• 33:50Freya Bleathman?

  Having a baby, I think it quite commonly triggers those thoughts, being in a car accident. Yeah, so I was pretty anxious postpartum.

• 33:58Speaker 00

  Yeah, it's a very real thing. So thank you for sharing like that experience because I feel like a lot of people relate to having similar thoughts.

• 34:07Georgia Allison?

  Hmm, and interestingly, like I had, I know we've said to, to today that my village really rallied around Matt and I. But that didn't change, that actually almost exasperated my anxiety, um, around the boys. Because I really relate to what this listener has written into about being on display. Like, I'm constantly on display when I go out with my children. And they're four. When I were tiny babies, um, the attention that I got was mostly positive. But it was also really encompassing. I felt all eyes on me, I'm getting positive, uh, comments, feeling like shit being separated from my children. So the separation, separation anxiety really crept up.

• 34:49Georgia Allison?

  And then when I was able to bring them home, despite the amount of people that were at my house, sometimes I just needed them to go away.

• 34:57Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 34:58Georgia Allison?

  I needed them to be.

• 34:59Freya Bleathman?

  It's a blessing and a curse, isn't it?

• 35:00Georgia Allison?

  Yeah, it is. And I felt like because I needed so much support in feeding the children, like I would do a tandem breastfeed. And Matt would do a full breast milk bottle. And then we would do a top ups for the two that were on a tandem breastfeed to make sure that they were equal. Um, they were ha- having an equal amount of mils of breast milk, um, compared to that third baby.

• 35:23Freya Bleathman?

  And tandem.

• 35:24Georgia Allison?

  Tandem breastfeeding, so yeah, one baby on each breast. Um, and then after that, the feed would just, it was like a merry-go-round. Whoever was on the right bro- broob was on the left.

• 35:35Speaker 00

  Literally right.

• 35:35Georgia Allison?

  Yeah, literally. And there was a full calendar, like a list on our, um, like we had this like butcher's paper sort of thing on our, in our house of who was ready to do what.

• 35:48Freya Bleathman?

  You almost need, you know how you have the hairband trick to remember which side? You need to like put it on their wrist. And then the one that's due for a bottle gets it on the foot.

• 35:56Georgia Allison?

  Thankfully, I had Matt White there, who's my husband. He was, he was in charge of all of that. But sometimes when so many people wanted to help, like they were desperate to help, help me. I was sort of like, nah, you're not doing it right. Give it to me, give him to me, give him to me, give him to Matt, he knows how to do it. You're holding the nozzle a little bit differently. You know, when you've got preemie babies, you have to have these sort of different size. Yeah, we had newborns exactly for so long. And so we had to have like a slow release teat, which for that bottle, which meant that it would sort of replicate my nipple of the breast milk coming out. And so I just ramped up this anxiety being like, I'm just, I felt pent up being like, everyone has to fuck off.

• 36:35Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 36:36Georgia Allison?

  And I know how to do this.

• 36:37Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 36:38Georgia Allison?

  And.

• 36:38Speaker 00

  And you're just interrupting. Yeah, yeah, yeah, we're on the flow.

• 36:41Georgia Allison?

  Yeah, it was hard for us to, um, to work through. And we did, and with, thankfully, um, you know, I'm so close with my family as well as Matt's family, they get it. And they knew that we were sort of the, um, the experts in the triplets. So they could always, um, like handball to us. But I, the, the being on display that this woman has, um, touched on, I, is a hard relate.

• 37:07Speaker 00

  The second part of her mailbag, let's touch on that because I think it's an interesting one around connection and how people want to help or compliments that you, um, get or maybe backhanded compliments. In this case, you know, she's heard from her mother-in-law. Um, and it was a comment on her body appearance. Um, and then she had a bit of a, you know, remark of let's not do that.

• 37:30Georgia Allison?

  Hmm, to remind the listeners, she says something along the lines of, it's wonderful to see that my tummy, she said to me, it was wonderful to see that my tummy was already looking back to normal.

• 37:41Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah, let's talk about, have you, when you see someone postpartum, have you complimented them or made a comment about body appearance?

• 37:51Georgia Allison?

  I make an effort not to mention anything about the body, but I will always comment, um, on the mother. Because I have this like theory that after you have a baby, you glow. Your skin never looked better.

• 38:04Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 38:04Georgia Allison?

  So often we'll make comments about the ba- uh, sorry.

• 38:08Freya Bleathman?

  I was gonna say, I was like acne.

• 38:13Georgia Allison?

  No!

• 38:14Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah, I think you're right, the hair and the skin.

• 38:16Freya Bleathman?

  But I like, I agree, I will, that's the sort of thing I'll comment on.

• 38:20Georgia Allison?

  Yeah.

• 38:21Speaker 00

  Yes.

• 38:21Freya Bleathman?

  Like even as someone, if someone told me I didn't look like I just had a baby, which never happens.

• 38:28Freya Bleathman?

  Still look like I just had a baby. Like, that would be a huge compliment for me. But I know you just, you've got a hedge of eggs, don't go there, don't go. Because it probably would even, I feel like in times of my life where I've lost weight and people have commented on it. Then when I inevitably regain weight, because my body just does that, it goes up and down a lot.

• 38:44Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 38:45Freya Bleathman?

  Then I'm like, oh, they must, they're not saying the compliments, they must be thinking that I look, you know, terrible.

• 38:52Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 38:53Freya Bleathman?

  But yeah, I, I like to say things like, oh, like, oh, you're glowing, you look like, yeah.

• 38:59Speaker 00

  Yeah, what do you think of the mother-in-law's comment? And whether or not the listener, she's kind of asked us at the end, should she apologize or not?

• 39:11Freya Bleathman?

  I, I feel for the mother-in-law a little bit. I mean, she, she was, she's just a different generation, do you know what I mean? I really, I think if you're thinking about intent, I think she, her heart was in the right place. I think she was really trying to say something very kind.

• 39:28Georgia Allison?

  Yeah.

• 39:29Freya Bleathman?

  I don't think the listener was in the wrong by saying what she said. But I don't think, I, I, I feel like probably both of them could do a little, I'm sorry, yeah, I'm sorry too, kind of situation.

• 39:43Speaker 00

  I don't know if they need to say sorry. I, I think an acknowledgement, you know, and I, I've had, you know, situations where I've heard friends or even my own family experiences where, you know, it is hard to connect sometimes with those older generations, where they just.

• 40:00Georgia Allison?

  Say silly things.

• 40:01Speaker 00

  Say some dumb things or like, you know, they're trying to connect or understand. And, um, you know, I think in their way, like, they're probably thinking that they're doing this lovely thing by saying the compliment.

• 40:12Freya Bleathman?

  So she's probably a bit hurt at the reaction.

• 40:14Georgia Allison?

  Yeah, potentially.

• 40:15Speaker 00

  I was trying to say that you look beautiful and like, not in that way and like, could have probably chosen better words.

• 40:20Georgia Allison?

  Yeah.

• 40:20Speaker 00

  Um, and so for me, I'm like, I don't know if it's a sorry because the intent may have been there, but I do think it could do with an acknowledgement or like some type of like text message or like, hey, when I snapped at you the other day, it hadn't had sleep, hadn't eaten at four P M. I'm not feeling really great. And then you commented on the body and then you've done an explainer without a sorry, which I just don't think it needs a sorry, but that's my personal view, but maybe some context.

• 40:49Georgia Allison?

  I just don't think she needs to say anything.

• 40:50Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 40:50Freya Bleathman?

  I don't think. Frosty, do you just let it simmer? Do you, do you think the partner, like the, I don't know if it's husband or wife.

• 40:57Georgia Allison?

  Husband or partner? I just think if it is frosty, let her feel the frost. I mean, I sort of, I'm sort of happy that this woman sort of said something like, I feel like I look back to myself and I had some, you know, positive, or I call them backhanded positive comments that I just didn't love. I sort of wish I had the balls to say like, hey, let's not go there. Like she's probably said it in a way of, she's not, if it's frosty, let that, let her mother in law sit in that for a second.

• 41:22Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 41:22Georgia Allison?

  I don't think it's something that, I don't think she's out of line for saying anything.

• 41:26Speaker 00

  No, I don't think she's out of line.

• 41:27Georgia Allison?

  I also don't equally don't think the mother in law was out of line saying anything either.

• 41:30Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 41:30Georgia Allison?

  To your point, Rafa, the connection that the older generation have, I mean, their own bounce back culture was a bit different to ours. So probably she was desperate for someone to say that to her back in the day. If someone had said to her, you're already back in your jeans, look at you go, your tummy's already looking like you've never had a baby. She was probably like, yes. So she's probably thinking, that's what I wanted to hear when I was having, I had a baby. So assuming we're the same here.

• 41:58Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 41:59Georgia Allison?

  I don't know, I just feel like maybe down the line, like when they've come out, when she's, she's freshly postpartum, I hope these two, um, can sort of sit back in about a few months and have a wine and be like, yeah, I don't know, things have changed. I didn't love that comment. I wasn't feeling great myself at that time. So that comment struck a chord or not even mention it is something to do with the mother in law.

• 42:23Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 42:23Georgia Allison?

  Use a different example. Oh, someone at work said something about me bouncing back and I just hated it because at that time I was feeling pretty anxious and the baby would only sleep in my arms. You remember that time?

• 42:34Speaker 00

  Yeah, that's right. And I think context helps. And that's the kind of piece that I'm like, I don't know if it requires a sorry, but sometimes helping the other generations on the journey of why the snap happened.

• 42:48Freya Bleathman?

  I think that's helpful.

• 42:49Speaker 00

  Goes like really helps or it's really helped my conversations. And I bring that up in that maybe context can help because maybe mother in law doesn't know that she's not eating till four P M. And in my case, when I've made helpful, um, contextual, like, or explained situation, I wouldn't be surprised if mother in law brings a whole hamper of sandwiches next week.

• 43:08Georgia Allison?

  Yeah.

• 43:09Speaker 00

  Do you know what I mean? So I think sometimes just explaining that, like, the reason why that snap happened can go a long way, like further down the track.

• 43:17Freya Bleathman?

  Yeah. I think as the non-postpartum person, if things are still frosty, I do still think the onus is on the mother in law to kind of open that.

• 43:25Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 43:26Freya Bleathman?

  Dialogue. She might've reflected on it and worked out what it was, but, um, I think, yeah, I think a little bit of education is, is helpful, you know, learning, we all say the wrong things.

• 43:37Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 43:37Freya Bleathman?

  I think you've got to do it in a kind way, but then also you're three months postpartum, like you've got so many responsibilities.

• 43:44Speaker 00

  Yeah, yeah. Is this another thing to add to the list?

• 43:47Georgia Allison?

  Yeah, the only thing that I'll add is if this listener is having additional anxiety around the fact that there's frostiness and if an apology would put that to bed, as annoying as that is in the sort of, um, the, the mental load that she is carrying currently being 12 weeks postpartum, if that is going to alleviate some stress and anxiety, send the message.

• 44:09Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 44:09Georgia Allison?

  The mother in law is probably always going to appreciate it. She, the mother in law, in my example, or like in my mind, the mother in law will be like, what did I say?

• 44:18Speaker 00

  Yeah.

• 44:18Georgia Allison?

  I can just imagine my mum who.

• 44:20Speaker 00

  Such a flippant comment.

• 44:21Georgia Allison?

  Yeah, just be like, oh, no, you look great. You're doing such an incredible job. Like, you know, I just, it probably, there was no maliciousness in that, that comment. So I think, um, yeah, that's all I'll add to mine.

• 44:32Freya Bleathman?

  Cause it's clearly weighing on the listener. She's written in to us. And she articulates herself really well. So I think that would, you know, just copy and paste this to your mother in law.

• 44:41Georgia Allison?

  Send her this episode.

• 44:42Speaker 00

  Yeah, absolutely.

• 44:44Freya Bleathman?

  And tell her to rate us five stars.

• 44:45Speaker 00

  Yeah. Well, on that note, we are gonna wrap up today's show. Um, if you think someone would love this episode or the show, please send it on to them. Keep writing in, we're loving hearing from you. Email us at [email protected] and we look forward to diving into next week's.

• 45:07Georgia Allison?

  See you Tuesday.

• 45:08Speaker 00

  Bye.