Why Listening to Action Bronson Makes Us Happy (PTFO Vault)

He raps, cooks, paints, hosts and acts (for Martin Scorsese, at least). He also has philosophical explanations for why A) he never wears pants, B) his go-to move is the headbutt and C) nothing is better than a VHS tape. But Action Bronson had still never heard of the Accidental Bronson tribute account. Until this episode. (This episode originally aired November 10, 2023.) • Subscribe to Pablo Torre Finds Out on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@PabloTorreFindsOut/ for more greatest hits • Subscribe to Pablo's newsletter https://pablo.show/ for exclusive access, documents and invites Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy https://acast.com/privacy for more information.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:01Pablo Torre?

  Hello, it's me, Pablo. So we've done, doing the math, 327 episodes of Pablo Torre Finds Out since we launched in September 2023, and it is the end of 2025, and I could not be prouder of our tiny, little, and extremely overworked newsroom that has created this bizarre sports news magazine show that is television, but also, obviously, an audio-first podcast, because we've punched above our weight, I think, especially this year. But the stuff that we did before, the previous, you know, hundreds of episodes, we have some

• 0:42Pablo Torre?

  favorites that we are now concerned that you maybe have not heard yet, or maybe don't realize are even better when you listen to it a second time. And so during the holiday break, we're bringing you our favorites from the PTFO Vault. And we also have a newsletter, by the way, www.pablo.show, where I'll be doing some stuff over the holiday break especially. Please subscribe and support our approach to independent sports journalism. But most of all, thank you. Thank you for making this show not just a weird experiment, but a community of people who support the kind of mission that we're on, to hold to account extraordinarily rich and powerful people while also taste-testing, you know, athlete-branded weed. We contain multitudes, as does our vault. Please enjoy.

• 1:28Pablo Torre?

  Welcome to Pablo Torre Finds Out. I am Pablo Torre, and today, we're going to find out what this sound is.

• 1:34Speaker 01

  Doing lines off a Nintendo Switch in the back of a Hyundai Sonata. Yeah, I mean, I feel like they're tapping into things like that, I would want to say.

• 1:43Pablo Torre?

  Right after this ad.

• 1:47Speaker 02

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• 2:22Speaker 03

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• 2:55Pablo Torre?

  This episode is brought to you by Apollo.io. A lot of the stories on this show start the same way. Something that looks pretty simple turns out to be a mess once you look under the hood. Well, it's no different in the sales world. Your team has a tool for finding prospects, a different tool for reaching out to them, and a third for keeping track of it all. On paper, that's a system. In practice, it's a salesperson spending the better part of the day copying names from one tab into another, and not much of it actually selling. Apollo.io is a platform that helps sales teams find the right buyers and reach out to them. It brings prospecting, outreach, and follow-up into one place instead of several separate tools. It's used by sales teams of all sizes,

• 3:39Pablo Torre?

  from small businesses to larger organizations. And it's built for teams who want less manual busywork and more time with buyers. If your marketing and sales teams are trying to work from the same view of the customer, it's worth a look. Sign up for free at Apollo.io. That's Apollo.io.

• 4:03Pablo Torre?

  Yo.

• 4:04Speaker 01

  How are you?

• 4:04Pablo Torre?

  Yo.

• 4:06Speaker 01

  What's going on, B?

• 4:07Pablo Torre?

  Please.

• 4:08Speaker 01

  How you feeling, man?

• 4:09Pablo Torre?

  I'm great. I'm great now that you're here, man.

• 4:11Speaker 01

  Yeah, we're here.

• 4:12Pablo Torre?

  Are you sufficiently stoned enough?

• 4:14Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah. I need an espresso, but can we lower this? Because I don't [bleep] with this height of a chair. It's like a three-quarter chair. I don't like that.

• 4:27Pablo Torre?

  You approve, though. The espresso's alright.

• 4:29Speaker 01

  It's really good. The taste of vanilla.

• 4:31Pablo Torre?

  That's what I chose for you.

• 4:32Speaker 01

  You chose the vanilla one?

• 4:33Pablo Torre?

  I did.

• 4:35Speaker 01

  I usually wouldn't go for it, but man, wow.

• 4:40Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 4:41Pablo Torre?

  A wow from you means a lot to me. Not that I should take credit for whatever Nespresso pod.

• 4:46Speaker 01

  Tahitian.

• 4:47Pablo Torre?

  That's your usual go-to.

• 4:48Speaker 01

  Well, no, I feel like you depotted it and then just laid all the bean in there for me.

• 4:55Pablo Torre?

  That's exactly what I did. Thank you for noticing.

• 4:59Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 5:21Pablo Torre?

  There are some things in the city of New York that feel extraordinarily New York. And as a New York show, Pablo Torre finds out that feels the need to occasionally remind people that, yes, we have a physical studio in Manhattan where we tape our show. I marvel at a person like Ashton Bronson, who is oozing New York out of every pore, and who is a rapper, and an artist, and a chef, and a 30-something, I believe 39-year-old, native New Yorker, and a host of [BLEEP] That's Delicious, a wildly popular show about food. He's a Renaissance man, in a way that is entirely sincere. And so, when I saw him on the sidewalk,

• 6:04Pablo Torre?

  on one of my many, almost entirely random walks through the city, I realized that I had many, many questions that I needed to ask him. What I wasn't sure was whether his particular strain of consciousness would indulge the many questions that I had for him. I knew this was gonna be different.

• 6:28Pablo Torre?

  And so, I just needed to tell him how I felt.

• 6:34Pablo Torre?

  I am so glad that you're sitting here.

• 6:40Speaker 01

  Oh, thank you.

• 6:42Pablo Torre?

  For real. Like, I was trying to, we were trying to figure out, like, how do we explain to someone who hasn't listened to your music, Action Bronson, before? And we had a couple of like, well, first off, what do you, when you imagine a listener and appreciator of your music doing when they're listening to you, what do you imagine?

• 7:02Speaker 01

  I don't really give a shit, to be honest with you. Like, I'm just doing it for myself.

• 7:09Speaker 01

  I'm not even thinking about, like, anything else but new things. I'm just in, like, I've just come back from a new path. I'm riding a new path. I feel great.

• 7:27Speaker 01

  It's hard to describe anything. I don't, it's like, if I wanted to describe it, I would've talked to you about it. You know what I'm saying? Like, it's like when you paint. I didn't want to talk to you. I painted you something, and that's that.

• 7:45Speaker 01

  Right now, we're in the process of making new music, new breakthroughs. So then I'll be excited. Having a brand-new band and doing things like that, like,

• 7:56Speaker 01

  like the Tiny Desk and shit like that, you know, like...

• 7:59Pablo Torre?

  That's the shit, though, that I've been listening to all week. That.

• 8:03Speaker 01

  The motherfuckers are crazy, man. Oh, my God. I'm sorry for cussing. It's like one of those, those platforms, when you're respected in music, they bring you on there, and I don't know, people seem to really enjoy it.

• 8:28Pablo Torre?

  I just want to say this very clearly if you have not listened or learned much about Action Bronson before this interview somehow. This Tiny Desk Concert at NPR in DC, yo, Nadir behind the glass, one of my guys, we were trying to figure out how do we describe this music and he was like, "This music makes me want to ride a horse."

• 8:46Speaker 01

  Hmm, yes.

• 8:58Speaker 01

  It brings out all the emotions of carnal desires.

• 9:01Pablo Torre?

  Yes.

• 9:02Speaker 01

  Riding horses on beaches naked, just things of that nature like fire, just watching fire burn, watching the ocean roar.

• 9:33Speaker 01

  Free flow in the acid jazz, I'm a jazz instrument, just like a goddamn saxophone or the Rhodes, I am, you know?

• 9:58Speaker 01

  So it's definitely reinvigorated me in that manner, but it's, I have to put myself in a hole to dig myself out right now, that's the zone.

• 10:09Pablo Torre?

  So the zone sounds a little miserable if you're using a hole to describe it.

• 10:13Speaker 01

  Nah, not really, it's all, it's all, these are all like, I'm dramatic, I'm being dramatic.

• 10:21Speaker 01

  It's all dramatizations.

• 10:22Pablo Torre?

  I like how you said earlier, I'm not good at describing things. And I'm like, you, I think, are one of the best describers of things.

• 10:30Speaker 01

  But no, it's not. Because it's not, I'm not trying, I'm not describing it exact. It's a rendition of my exact brain. This is like, it's like the picture behind you. That's what's happening.

• 10:42Pablo Torre?

  I want to say, people have questions like, how do I book this show? I literally ran into you on the street one day. Do you remember this? I don't know if you remember this. On the street, like in Soho, I ran into you. I think we were both varying levels of stoned, incidentally.

• 10:55Speaker 01

  Yeah, listen, I love the round the horn. That's how you booked this.

• 11:02Pablo Torre?

  But then I, I, I, I saw you then, I see you now. And it's kind of a fall day in New York. And I guess I should ask, like, when was the last time you wore pants?

• 11:12Speaker 01

  I don't, probably fifteen to twenty years. The last time I put pants on, I had an accident. And I never wore them again.

• 11:22Pablo Torre?

  What happened?

• 11:25Speaker 01

  Just wasn't good. It just wasn't good. It can't be discussed. It can't be discussed, but what I will say, that they were never to be touched on my skin again.

• 11:35Pablo Torre?

  Every time I've ever seen you, you're wearing shorts.

• 11:40Speaker 01

  And they're stretchy so I could squat, so I could work out. I'm not [BLEEP] around with stiff shorts. You understand? I'm over here flexible.

• 11:53Pablo Torre?

  When did you learn that you needed to have stretchy shorts?

• 11:58Speaker 01

  I was a husky child.

• 12:01Speaker 01

  Everyone needs stretchy shorts. I don't think that anyone should wear a constricting situation. Anything constricting is like, I get, like, sometimes you get that heat flash that comes over you and you just want to rip everything off. Rip [BLEEP] shirt off. I get that a lot. So for me, for me to be able to use the actual agility that I was given by nature and science with, you know, my body construction, it's only right that I put on a material that reflects and echoes all of the property.

• 12:42Speaker 01

  You know?

• 12:44Pablo Torre?

  I feel like when you were a kid, though.

• 12:47Pablo Torre?

  What was that like? What's young Action Bronson like?

• 12:50Speaker 01

  Yeah, I mean, I don't know, like, it's fucking wild, man. Every kid's crazy, I feel, in some aspect. You're not even fully conscious, you know? You're just kinda like drunk. You're kinda like on ass, you don't know what the fuck is really going on. You're so... Like a little Bambi-ish, you know? So you're just running amok, doing whatever, thinking that there's no consequence on earth.

• 13:19Speaker 01

  And then, I don't know, one day it just all hits you. You're old and gray, your balls sag, you know? Your ass leaks.

• 13:30Speaker 01

  Not talking about me, but in general. These things happen.

• 13:36Speaker 01

  I feel like as I get older, I get more sophisticated, looking like Sean Connery.

• 13:40Pablo Torre?

  The gravitas is all over your beard now.

• 13:43Speaker 01

  It's happening, it's happening.

• 13:46Pablo Torre?

  When you're a kid and someone picks a fight with you, what's the move?

• 13:54Speaker 01

  Headbutt.

• 13:57Speaker 01

  I'm a headbutter.

• 13:58Pablo Torre?

  When'd you discover that that was your move? That's like a Zangief move.

• 14:02Speaker 01

  It's like this...

• 14:06Speaker 01

  You ever watched the movie Gladiator?

• 14:08Pablo Torre?

  Of course.

• 14:09Speaker 01

  But with Brian Dennehy? That one?

• 14:11Pablo Torre?

  No.

• 14:12Speaker 01

  Cuba Gooding Jr. It was an early underground fighting movie, boxing. And he used to say this was the hardest part of the head.

• 14:24Speaker 04

  The top of the head, kid. Hardest part of the body hurts, don't it, huh? What are you gonna do now? What are you gonna do now? Here he comes, here he comes.

• 14:35Speaker 01

  You've never [__] seen Gladiator with Brian Dennehy?

• 14:39Speaker 01

  You kidding me right now? I have this on VHS.

• 14:44Speaker 01

  Cuba Gooding Jr. Do you know that actor?

• 14:47Pablo Torre?

  Of course.

• 14:48Speaker 01

  You might have heard of him?

• 14:49Pablo Torre?

  I wish someone had shown me the VHS tape of Gladiator starring Cuba Gooding Jr. Yeah.

• 14:55Speaker 01

  It was starring Brian Dennehy.

• 14:57Pablo Torre?

  Sorry.

• 14:58Speaker 01

  Cuba Gooding Jr. had the supporting role. But I had a grandfather, a very good man, who loved his VHSs and that's what he collected. And I have about 3,000 in my house.

• 15:12Pablo Torre?

  Holy [__].

• 15:13Speaker 01

  Yeah, that he left me, all kinds of crazy [__]. I've seen it all. I've seen them all.

• 15:19Pablo Torre?

  What's better about a VHS?

• 15:21Speaker 01

  There's grain. Everything is better about tape. There's some graininess. You have to be a connoisseur to understand it. It's like the in-between space.

• 15:31Pablo Torre?

  The imperfection of it.

• 15:33Speaker 01

  It's that, but it also adds. It gives comfort and warmth in some aspects. Film is just captured differently than digital. You know, it's like, whatever. Anyone could pick the camera up and make the thing, you know?

• 15:47Pablo Torre?

  I should point out that you have acted for Martin Scorsese. When you talk about film.

• 15:53Speaker 01

  Yes, I'm accredited as a film actor in the guild.

• 15:59Pablo Torre?

  That's right. I mean, you were in The Irishman.

• 16:03Speaker 01

  It's pretty [__] bizarre.

• 16:04Pablo Torre?

  Can you explain what meeting Martin Scorsese and being directed by Martin Scorsese was like?

• 16:10Speaker 01

  Most of the time, people are as stoked as you are to meet them as they are to meet you. So when they-

• 16:17Pablo Torre?

  He was a fan of yours.

• 16:18Speaker 01

  I don't know if that's the case, but he definitely showed enthusiasm and showed a lot of love and it was nothing but happiness and laughter. And, you know, we had a good time. It was only, we only did about three takes and that was it.

• 16:35Pablo Torre?

  What was the role you played for people who are unfamiliar?

• 16:37Speaker 01

  I, just some [__] weird, like, casket salesman. And about the third hour, 10-minute mark.

• 16:49Speaker 01

  It was a pivotal point. They're like the Cadillacs of caskets. Now, if we're putting you in the [__] oven, it really doesn't matter what you're going. The cheapest [__] possible. Particle board, that's it. What are we doing today? Are we doing a cremation?

• 17:04Pablo Torre?

  I remember distinctly waking up on my couch to the third hour thereabout mark and thinking to myself, am I hallucinating Action Bronson into this film?

• 17:14Speaker 01

  With that beard, it was bizarre. He asked me to take the beard off. But I, you know, at that point, I was like, man, this is like, I have like six chins under here. So I'm probably not.

• 17:26Pablo Torre?

  I'm imagining, I'm imagining your home. And I'm imagining the 3,000 VHS tapes. I'm imagining your incredibly worn down rewinder.

• 17:36Speaker 01

  You already know there was a rewinder. There has to be. There's no, there's no, you can't put your machine through that type of wear and tear. You need a separate rewinder. And it was a Corvette.

• 17:47Pablo Torre?

  Oh, [__].

• 17:48Speaker 01

  You know how the Corvette rewinder.

• 17:50Pablo Torre?

  Yeah, the red rewinder. And so if I were to put your brain inside of your Corvette rewinder, what is the memory that comes up that is not actually on tape anywhere, but you think of as, oh, this is a core memory that I, Action Bronson, have?

• 18:05Speaker 01

  So I have so many. I couldn't tell you those. Those are for me. I can't tell you.

• 18:13Pablo Torre?

  The pants ones in there, isn't there? Yeah.

• 18:15Speaker 01

  No, the pants, what pants? There's no, there's no secret of the pants. I don't wear them.

• 18:23Speaker 01

  I just don't think that they're nice. Fashion wise, I don't like to cover my leg. I work hard to get a calf that has some sort of diamond shape.

• 18:35Pablo Torre?

  I, I, I'm ashamed.

• 18:36Speaker 01

  Why would I want to take away from that calf?

• 18:38Pablo Torre?

  I'm ashamed.

• 18:39Speaker 01

  I like a sock. I like to show the shoe. I like a full, like my [__] is like my, my quadricep is literally out, fully flexed.

• 18:51Pablo Torre?

  Yes, yes. Quads out.

• 18:54Speaker 01

  It's the quad season. I'm just trying to recover from a sacroiliac injury. It's under your like ass area, like your nut groin. From the back.

• 19:04Pablo Torre?

  Like, this is, this is a...

• 19:05Speaker 01

  It's a very specific area. It's like these muscles that keep the hamstring nice.

• 19:09Pablo Torre?

  So that's not like the grundle?

• 19:11Speaker 01

  It's near it.

• 19:13Pablo Torre?

  Grundle adjacent?

• 19:14Speaker 01

  It's, it's parallel to the grundle. It's running parallel.

• 19:19Pablo Torre?

  Yep, yep, yep.

• 19:20Speaker 01

  It's in a grid.

• 19:21Pablo Torre?

  Yep. Almost asymptotic to the grundle. Sort of like always approaching but never touching it.

• 19:28Speaker 01

  Nah, it runs congruent.

• 19:32Pablo Torre?

  Hmm.

• 19:33Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 19:35Pablo Torre?

  I should point out that your calf philosophy shames me because I consider the Filipino people on Filipino um, to have excellent calves. I consider my calves excellent. I have artwork about the Filipino calf.

• 19:48Speaker 01

  Wow.

• 19:49Pablo Torre?

  This is like, uh, this is not the first time I pointed this out to a guest, but on the left is like a standard, like a white guy, you know, just very vertical calf. On the right is the Filipino calf in my view. And I've been told I should wear more shorts.

• 20:02Speaker 01

  You do. You have to show, you have to show, you have to condition your shin also.

• 20:06Pablo Torre?

  The shin?

• 20:06Speaker 01

  The shin bone muscle is very important as well. You have to do the front flex, not only the calf. You can't just do front, you gotta do back also.

• 20:15Pablo Torre?

  So what is, how do you, how do you, how do you work out your shin?

• 20:19Speaker 01

  You fle- flex your toe upwards.

• 20:22Pablo Torre?

  Hmm.

• 20:24Speaker 01

  Do you feel that muscle?

• 20:25Pablo Torre?

  I do.

• 20:25Speaker 01

  Now put it back down. No, no, you doesn't have to go all the way up. No, no, no, put your leg down, your leg down. Yeah, right there, right there. Flex your foot. Now really flex it up tight.

• 20:36Pablo Torre?

  Oh yeah, there it is.

• 20:36Speaker 01

  Feel that muscle?

• 20:37Pablo Torre?

  There it is.

• 20:38Speaker 01

  That one.

• 20:39Pablo Torre?

  What is your workout routine like now?

• 20:44Speaker 01

  I just [bleep] can go hard for an hour and a half and, you know, I do, I do things that I like doing, and then I do things that I hate doing.

• 20:54Pablo Torre?

  Give me the thing you love the most, give me the thing you hate the most.

• 20:58Speaker 01

  I don't really like bench pressing. It's not really like, I don't **** love that ****. I love to squat. I love to **** do like Zercher squats with the weight in front of you. I like picking up stones and sandbags and **** like that. I don't like running. I don't like doing running for long distance.

• 21:21Pablo Torre?

  You like the World's Strongest Man ****.

• 21:23Speaker 01

  I do, but then I also like, like skinny boy ****. I wanna be **** in shape as well. I like the MMA type of cardio training. I like fighting training. I like that type of ****. I like to be pushed to the physical limits.

• 21:40Pablo Torre?

  There's a tattoo you have that I believe is, um...

• 21:43Speaker 01

  Nothing means anything.

• 21:45Pablo Torre?

  So, the one that you have...

• 21:47Speaker 01

  Doesn't mean a **** thing.

• 21:49Pablo Torre?

  Barry Bonds, his season?

• 21:52Speaker 01

  Doesn't really mean a thing. I was a stupid kid. This is going back to being an idiot. Why did I do that? He had other seasons where he was juiced up, but that was his most juiced up season. I can't wait to get on **** G H, honestly.

• 22:07Pablo Torre?

  Barry Bonds is...

• 22:08Speaker 01

  Soon as I turn 40, I'm taking G H.

• 22:11Pablo Torre?

  Barry Bonds' 73 homerun season, you have that stat line tattooed on your body. And the growth hormone...

• 22:18Speaker 01

  It wasn't his most impressive average season. You know that.

• 22:23Pablo Torre?

  Well...

• 22:25Speaker 01

  He hit like 380, right? 375?

• 22:27Pablo Torre?

  Barry Bonds hit 370 the year after that.

• 22:33Speaker 01

  Exactly. That was more impressive. Less home runs...

• 22:35Pablo Torre?

  Cause he got walked all the time.

• 22:36Speaker 01

  Less home runs, but hit 370.

• 22:37Pablo Torre?

  Yes, yes. Got walked all the time, was the most feared player in baseball. And by the way...

• 22:42Speaker 01

  That's how I step to the plate. You put that thing on your **** arm. When you have that on and you have a dangling earring, who were you to be **** with?

• 22:50Pablo Torre?

  Just about to headbutt a **** in baseball.

• 22:52Speaker 01

  His head was like, his jaw. He had G H face.

• 22:55Pablo Torre?

  So, the G H face, the growth hormone.

• 22:58Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 22:58Pablo Torre?

  Have you taken steroids before?

• 23:00Speaker 01

  Yeah. 24 years old, I was juiced up. I don't know, I was taking Project Juice. My boy was like, you know, from, my boy from the neighborhood was getting some juice. And we was shooting it up. Shooting up juice.

• 23:14Pablo Torre?

  Into what part of your body were you shooting up Project Juice?

• 23:18Speaker 01

  Arm, leg, ass cheek, rear delt. Seriously. Bad ****. But who knew where this juice was coming from? Could have been canola oil.

• 23:30Speaker 01

  Could have been whatever, mazola. I could have been [__] giving myself goddamn project surgery, you know, like BBLs.

• 23:38Pablo Torre?

  Yep, yep, yep, yep. And what would you go do, though, with all of the?

• 23:42Speaker 01

  I would go [__] do ballet. And ice skate.

• 23:48Speaker 01

  We might go [__] lift weights, bro. Meathead [__].

• 23:54Speaker 01

  Eat turkey. Raw turkey. Rolled in meat.

• 24:02Speaker 01

  Rolled in raw chicken meat. And then rolled in provolone.

• 24:08Speaker 01

  Iso Pure, EAS, Bill Romanowski.

• 24:12Pablo Torre?

  Yes.

• 24:12Speaker 01

  You understand? That's the type. I was taking creatine at 13 years old.

• 24:17Pablo Torre?

  I imagine you now. I imagine young Action Bronson eating a raw [__] turducken like John Madden.

• 24:22Speaker 01

  Straight up tur- I mean.

• 24:26Speaker 01

  Turducken is ridiculous, but I like it.

• 24:29Pablo Torre?

  It's, it does seem a little, like, unholy.

• 24:32Speaker 01

  Well, when it's done right, it's delicious. The idea of just, like, all that, I think it's craziness. That's more for, like, seems like it started for a party.

• 24:42Pablo Torre?

  That's right.

• 24:43Speaker 01

  Someone wanted to have a party, so they [__] let's do something festive.

• 24:55Pablo Torre?

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• 25:28Speaker 02

  A perfect crime film, says The Daily Beast. John Turturro gives a career best performance. Sony Pictures Classics proudly presents the acclaimed new thriller, The Only Living Pickpocket in New York. Turturro stars as an aging master pickpocket whose latest score puts him in the crosshairs of a ruthless crime family. Also starring Giancarlo Esposito, Tatiana Maslany, Will Price, and Steve Buscemi. See the film that the L.A. Times calls instantly classic. Opens October 23rd in New York and Los Angeles. Nationwide, October 30th.

• 26:03Speaker 05

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• 26:40Pablo Torre?

  I want to explain to people, I think of you as like the ambassador of Queens. So I'm from New York. I grew up on 30th and First in Manhattan. Friends lived in Queens, all of that.

• 26:51Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 26:52Pablo Torre?

  Spent way too much time in like the Floral Park area growing up.

• 26:55Speaker 01

  The hell were you doing in Floral Park?

• 26:57Pablo Torre?

  My friend Pietro D'Zario lived in a Floral Park. Flopo.

• 27:00Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 27:02Pablo Torre?

  Also Woodside, Filipino food.

• 27:04Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 27:06Pablo Torre?

  How do you explain Queens to people who have not been there?

• 27:08Speaker 01

  It's a mixture of every single life on earth in one place. So it's kind of like it's a holy land.

• 27:17Pablo Torre?

  It is the most diverse place maybe on earth, dude.

• 27:19Speaker 01

  It is, it is. It's a holy land. I've been a lot of place. I couldn't see anywhere else being this diverse.

• 27:26Speaker 01

  There's [BLEEP] that stacked up other places, but it's not with all these different cultures. It's truly unbelievable.

• 27:35Pablo Torre?

  Yes.

• 27:36Speaker 01

  It's truly an unbelievable place.

• 27:38Pablo Torre?

  Yes.

• 27:39Speaker 01

  It's somewhere you never, ever, ever have to leave, and you've already been everywhere.

• 27:46Pablo Torre?

  So, I feel like a lot of people, the export from Queens that they think they're getting is like, Kevin James, King of Queens.

• 27:54Speaker 01

  When I think of Queens, I think of Coming to America.

• 27:57Pablo Torre?

  Yes.

• 27:58Speaker 01

  That's the first thing I think of. And I think that that's a tremendous depiction of Queens.

• 28:03Pablo Torre?

  That one is, you're right.

• 28:05Speaker 01

  That shows Queens in one of the most incredible lights ever. You gotta go to Queens, that's where you're gonna [BLEEP] meet one of the most incredible...

• 28:12Pablo Torre?

  Royalty.

• 28:15Speaker 01

  Literally royalty. He got his face on the money, man. You know? He's rich. He is rich! What? He got his own money. And baby, when I tell you he's got his own money, I mean, the boy has got his own money! You did it this time! You hit the jackpot! That type of [BLEEP].

• 28:38Pablo Torre?

  Were you on AOL?

• 28:39Speaker 01

  Hell yeah.

• 28:40Pablo Torre?

  What was your screen name?

• 28:41Speaker 01

  Ace Suede 56.

• 28:43Pablo Torre?

  Hmm. How'd you get settled on that?

• 28:47Speaker 01

  How did I get settled? It didn't take much. I just thought of some [BLEEP] and that became that. My jersey number was 56 in high school, like a meathead, and that was it.

• 29:00Pablo Torre?

  So Ace Suede 56.

• 29:01Speaker 01

  Yep. At AOL.com.

• 29:04Pablo Torre?

  At AOL.com.

• 29:05Speaker 01

  Net Zero.

• 29:06Pablo Torre?

  Oh, yeah.

• 29:08Speaker 01

  The CD.

• 29:09Pablo Torre?

  Yep. Yep, I was on EarthLink.

• 29:11Speaker 01

  Damn. Those are two off-brand ones.

• 29:15Pablo Torre?

  Absolutely.

• 29:16Speaker 01

  I had this kid in my neighborhood who was a computer whiz. [BLEEP] built the computer. And he got me all set up on the, on the compact Rosario.

• 29:25Pablo Torre?

  Oh, yeah, man.

• 29:27Speaker 01

  And then I got the Dell. I didn't have the good [BLEEP]. When we had a word processor, I thought we had a computer. I would try to enter launch codes, but it never worked.

• 29:39Pablo Torre?

  What, what sport did you play, number 56?

• 29:41Speaker 01

  Football.

• 29:42Pablo Torre?

  Position?

• 29:43Speaker 01

  Bayside High School, center and nose guard. Prestige.

• 29:46Pablo Torre?

  Give me this counting report on you as a player.

• 29:51Speaker 01

  Deceptively quick.

• 29:57Speaker 01

  Hard hitting. Long lasting. IQ on [bleep] unbelievable [bleep]. My awareness is a hundred, hundred on Madden. So I'm like the field general. I'm the quarterback of the line. I know what the, I know more than the quarterback does. I question his throws.

• 30:25Speaker 01

  I question his decision making. Why'd you do that?

• 30:30Pablo Torre?

  What was the reaction when, when you are questioning what's happening on this team?

• 30:36Speaker 01

  I'm not that type of guy. I would, in my mind, I would, what the [bleep] was that, you know? I could like throw him under the bus. Onto the next play.

• 30:46Pablo Torre?

  Your athletic hero was who?

• 30:50Speaker 01

  My true athletic hero, I don't really know.

• 30:55Speaker 01

  Who did I look to is like, wow, Mike Tyson.

• 30:58Pablo Torre?

  Yeah.

• 30:59Speaker 01

  Yeah. He captivated me, as probably many others.

• 31:05Pablo Torre?

  Did you ever meet Mike?

• 31:06Speaker 01

  Yeah. He [bleep] kissed me on the hands.

• 31:11Pablo Torre?

  I'm sorry, how does that work?

• 31:12Speaker 01

  It's like, we kissed each other on hands, it was respect. Just happened. Just happened.

• 31:20Pablo Torre?

  I feel like Mike Tyson kissing you on the hand is kinda like, I don't know.

• 31:25Speaker 01

  It was crazy, that's why.

• 31:25Pablo Torre?

  Diana Ross kissing you on the vocal cord.

• 31:28Speaker 01

  That's pretty [bleep] heavy duty, but yeah. Yeah. I'd say so. You like Diana Ross?

• 31:36Pablo Torre?

  I was trying to think of spontaneously, who is the person who I'd most value vocal cords of?

• 31:41Speaker 01

  Kiss you on the vocal cord?

• 31:42Pablo Torre?

  Yeah, who's the equivalent of Mike Tyson? That's, that's the SAT problem. Mike Tyson is to hands as blank is to vocal cords.

• 31:50Speaker 01

  Hmm, let's see.

• 31:55Speaker 01

  I don't know [bleep]. Diana Ross, I guess.

• 32:02Pablo Torre?

  Celine Dion?

• 32:03Speaker 01

  Nah.

• 32:06Speaker 01

  Not really into her.

• 32:08Pablo Torre?

  I mean, Stevie Wonder.

• 32:10Speaker 01

  Now that's a vocal cord.

• 32:12Pablo Torre?

  Absolutely.

• 32:13Speaker 01

  That's a vocal cord kisser right there.

• 32:20Pablo Torre?

  You made a, you made a music video, though, in which you, this is like pre-deep fake. You edited your face onto the body of Magnus Ver Magnuson.

• 32:31Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 32:41Pablo Torre?

  Can you explain Magnus Ver Magnuson for people who don't know? The world's strongest man mythology?

• 32:47Speaker 01

  Yeah, Magnus Ver Magnuson is one of the, like, one of the top strong men of the world. I think he won three. He's just one of them in this world. Marius Pujanowski.

• 32:59Pablo Torre?

  Yes.

• 32:59Speaker 01

  Ukohola won it twice.

• 33:02Pablo Torre?

  Magnus won it four times.

• 33:03Speaker 01

  Magnus won it four.

• 33:04Pablo Torre?

  91, 94, 95, 96.

• 33:06Speaker 01

  Excuse me. But right now, I'm in bulk season. I'm back in bulk season. But not too much bulk. Just enough that when I come down, I'm shredded. And it's really showing.

• 33:21Pablo Torre?

  What does bulking up for, for you look like?

• 33:24Speaker 01

  Um, this is it. I'm 275 right now, that's it. Can't, can't allow myself to get over that. Bringing myself down to 230, I'm gonna look like [bleep] Jean-Claude Van Damme.

• 33:36Pablo Torre?

  He's doing a split between two trucks.

• 33:38Speaker 01

  Volvos.

• 33:39Pablo Torre?

  Volvos.

• 33:41Speaker 01

  Remember that commercial?

• 33:42Pablo Torre?

  Of course.

• 33:43Speaker 01

  This doesn't look like I'm [bleep] jacked up in this [bleep] picture. See, like it's both, I'm a little bit better now. Leaning forward, I don't look jacked. That's the issue.

• 33:55Pablo Torre?

  I mean, you're wearing a sweater.

• 33:58Speaker 01

  I'm wearing a Dikembe Mutombo jersey under this, bro.

• 34:00Pablo Torre?

  Are you really?

• 34:01Speaker 01

  [bleep] sure am.

• 34:02Pablo Torre?

  Nuggets?

• 34:03Speaker 01

  Who else? I mean, yeah, the Hawks, but yeah. It is.

• 34:06Pablo Torre?

  It's one of the greatest jerseys of all time. His Mutombo Nuggets jersey.

• 34:10Speaker 01

  And the Mutombo Hawks jersey.

• 34:12Pablo Torre?

  Both great. I once talked to Dikembe Mutombo about, um, his life, and he told me that his house, he had to have special toilets installed because, of course, he's like 7'2" or whatever it is.

• 34:25Speaker 01

  The importance of a good toilet, I was speaking to my colleague yesterday. You don't really know life until you sit on a warm toilet seat.

• 34:34Pablo Torre?

  Bro.

• 34:34Speaker 01

  You literally [bleep] immediately. And it's like...

• 34:40Speaker 01

  It's not just a regular [BLEEP]. Everything comes out. You know what I mean?

• 34:44Pablo Torre?

  Can I, can I bond with you hopefully about?

• 34:48Speaker 01

  But you know the toilet, you sit down and then start spraying something real quick. When you get up, I get up. So it doesn't hit me.

• 34:55Pablo Torre?

  So you don't like the bidet toilet?

• 34:56Speaker 01

  I duck it. I don't let, I don't let it touch me.

• 34:58Pablo Torre?

  Oh, come on. What are you doing?

• 35:00Speaker 01

  This is the mist prior.

• 35:01Pablo Torre?

  Oh, oh, oh, okay, okay.

• 35:03Speaker 01

  Because I guess they [BLEEP] moist in the area. But this is the pre-mist. I don't let that touch me.

• 35:08Pablo Torre?

  But, but under your control? You like a bidet?

• 35:12Speaker 01

  No.

• 35:12Pablo Torre?

  Oh, come on. What are you doing?

• 35:14Speaker 01

  I'm old school. I come from a grandma with no paper, just a hand. Just a hand.

• 35:22Pablo Torre?

  Can I? For the podcast, I'm Jackson Bronson.

• 35:26Speaker 01

  A grandmother doing this, not me.

• 35:28Pablo Torre?

  Is almost like flipping an imaginary pizza with his right hand.

• 35:34Pablo Torre?

  My, uh, my most disliked version of a toilet is the toilet with, uh, the padded seat.

• 35:44Speaker 01

  That's old school.

• 35:45Pablo Torre?

  I hate it.

• 35:45Speaker 01

  I mean, that's [BLEEP] weird when you, it deflates as soon as you sit on it.

• 35:49Pablo Torre?

  Yes.

• 35:50Speaker 01

  It's weird.

• 35:50Pablo Torre?

  It's like someone asking you to [BLEEP] into a pillow.

• 35:53Speaker 01

  Pull over, I'll [BLEEP] out the window. If I need to go, it's happening.

• 35:58Pablo Torre?

  But you like a warm seat, but that's about it.

• 35:59Speaker 01

  A warm seat is definitely a game changer. Cold, cold floor, warm seat.

• 36:05Pablo Torre?

  Yes.

• 36:06Speaker 01

  Duel. So you get the dual heat.

• 36:09Pablo Torre?

  Yup.

• 36:09Speaker 01

  Cool feet.

• 36:10Pablo Torre?

  Shins extended.

• 36:12Speaker 01

  Oh my, I mean. I don't know who wears clothes to [BLEEP], but I don't.

• 36:17Pablo Torre?

  You go full on, um...

• 36:18Speaker 01

  No matter where, if I'm in Kmart, Caldo. Wherever.

• 36:24Pablo Torre?

  Caldo?

• 36:24Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 36:25Pablo Torre?

  Yo, Caldo, man. I don't know if kids respect Caldo the way they need to.

• 36:29Speaker 01

  I used to take Caldo to the [BLEEP], to the cleaners.

• 36:33Pablo Torre?

  What are you doing inside of a Caldo?

• 36:34Speaker 01

  Steal anything that's, you know, all the paint. Take all the home products, the rollers.

• 36:42Pablo Torre?

  Handheld dustbusters?

• 36:44Speaker 01

  The **** when that red devil came out?

• 36:47Pablo Torre?

  Yes.

• 36:48Speaker 01

  The dirt devil?

• 36:48Pablo Torre?

  Yep.

• 36:50Speaker 01

  I've had a dustbuster in my house, ****, I can't even remember when I didn't. Right now, we don't even have a regular vacuum. We have a **** handheld dustbuster. There's no need. Either the shark or the dustbuster.

• 37:05Pablo Torre?

  So like the world of Roombas does not appeal to you? The robots?

• 37:10Speaker 01

  It actually makes me crazy when they put the thing on, I **** trip over it, creeps up on you.

• 37:15Pablo Torre?

  It does.

• 37:16Speaker 01

  You'll be cooking up some bull.

• 37:19Pablo Torre?

  I heard a story once about someone falling asleep on their, on their floor. The Roomba comes out, they have long hair, now they're being murdered by their, by their vacuum.

• 37:30Speaker 01

  I mean, listen, all that ****, we saw Terminator 2, this is what they were talking about. You understand? The machines. Skynet, this is what they were speaking of.

• 37:46Speaker 01

  Arnold told you already this was happening, and this is why when they bring the food with the robot, it freaks me the **** out.

• 37:54Pablo Torre?

  Yep.

• 37:54Speaker 01

  You know?

• 37:55Pablo Torre?

  Yep.

• 37:55Speaker 01

  I don't want to see that ****.

• 37:59Speaker 01

  **** drop underwear from ****, where's it from?

• 38:03Pablo Torre?

  Right, drones, like Amazon drones?

• 38:05Speaker 01

  Yeah, drop Amazon underwear, you drop the underwear with the plane.

• 38:10Pablo Torre?

  I like to imagine you like trying to, like ****, uh, throw a discus at those drones.

• 38:18Speaker 01

  Discus was one of the best sweatshirts brand that ever lived. One of the best athletic brands, and I don't know what happened to Discus, but man, Queens?

• 38:28Pablo Torre?

  Yes.

• 38:28Speaker 01

  If you had a **** Discus hoodie, or a Discus, whatever this one is called,

• 38:35Speaker 01

  you were the one.

• 38:36Pablo Torre?

  I want to ask you about a-

• 38:37Speaker 01

  Twelve pack of Sunwear shirts in the trunk, Talha. You know about these? You know about Talha shirts?

• 38:44Pablo Torre?

  No.

• 38:45Speaker 01

  It's from the white tee days. Made in Bangladesh.

• 38:50Pablo Torre?

  So how is a Talha shirt different from like the Hanes, you know?

• 38:54Speaker 01

  Because it's **** Talha. Tall tee.

• 38:58Pablo Torre?

  Mmm.

• 38:58Speaker 01

  Number six XT's.

• 39:00Pablo Torre?

  Of course.

• 39:01Speaker 01

  Weren't you doing **** New I Think They Like Me dances? Laffy Taffy?

• 39:08Pablo Torre?

  I mean, but this is the NBA, my favorite era of the NBA.

• 39:12Speaker 01

  Throwbacks, I mean, I don't think I've ever taken a throwback off since they came out. There's no need.

• 40:08Pablo Torre?

  Have you heard of this Twitter account called Accidental Bronson?

• 40:11Speaker 01

  No.

• 40:12Pablo Torre?

  I, I don't know if you're gonna love this or hate this, but would you be okay with me explaining this to you?

• 40:19Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 40:20Pablo Torre?

  So I was sitting at a New York Liberty game in the second row, right behind courtside. And in front of me was Carmelo Anthony. And I was eating, uh, pocky. You familiar with pocky?

• 40:32Speaker 01

  Of course. Which flavor?

• 40:34Pablo Torre?

  Matcha.

• 40:35Speaker 01

  Nice.

• 40:35Pablo Torre?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 40:36Speaker 01

  Good choice.

• 40:36Pablo Torre?

  Exactly. A rare, a rare, a rare version of it.

• 40:39Speaker 01

  Did it come from Japan?

• 40:41Pablo Torre?

  Yes. Of course. I'm not [BLEEP] around, man.

• 40:43Speaker 01

  Rare snacks, man?

• 40:44Pablo Torre?

  Rare snacks.

• 40:45Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 40:46Pablo Torre?

  So I'm eating this, this matcha green pocky behind Carmelo Anthony. And I tweeted out, and I just captioned it, "Quietly eating pocky behind Carmelo Anthony." And a Twitter account, which I did not know about till then, titled Accidental Bronson, retweets it. And I'm like, "What [BLEEP] is this?"

• 41:07Speaker 01

  Oh, it sounds like a, like something I would say.

• 41:09Pablo Torre?

  And it's just all of the things that people are tweeting inadvertently. And I'm like, "That is exactly a thing that [BLEEP] Accidental Bronson would say."

• 41:18Speaker 01

  It's true. I mean, to think about it like this.

• 41:23Speaker 01

  Real life is much crazier than anything that you script. You know? All the bull**** that you can conjure up in your mind really isn't that cool. If you just assess the situation around you real quick. Like, okay. This is what's happening.

• 41:41Pablo Torre?

  So you immediately intuitively understood the premise of Accidental Bronson?

• 41:46Speaker 01

  I get it.

• 41:46Pablo Torre?

  Can I show you some other ones that people have?

• 41:49Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 41:50Pablo Torre?

  I, I feel like-

• 41:51Speaker 01

  Go ahead, go ahead, go ahead.

• 41:52Pablo Torre?

  I mean, I just-

• 41:52Speaker 01

  Let's hear it. Let's hear it.

• 41:54Pablo Torre?

  I feel like you gotta say them, though.

• 41:55Speaker 01

  Nah, nah, nah. You have to say it. Nah, let me say it.

• 41:58Pablo Torre?

  Alright, okay.

• 41:59Speaker 01

  Let me say it, let me say it.

• 42:00Pablo Torre?

  And then, and then what you can, you can do though-

• 42:01Speaker 01

  Let me see it.

• 42:01Pablo Torre?

  You can grade it, okay? You can grade it. Let me just, I'm gonna expand the window on my laptop. I mean, this is gonna be a thing, because this is a tribute account to you.

• 42:09Speaker 01

  Okay, so, put me and Timothy Chalamet in the Oklahoma drill? And I'm putting him in a hospital? I mean, boom. That's hard.

• 42:17Pablo Torre?

  That's fucking hard.

• 42:18Speaker 01

  It's all about that type of word. Timothy Chalamet? Chamale? Chalamet?

• 42:26Pablo Torre?

  Chalamet.

• 42:26Speaker 01

  It's a good word.

• 42:27Pablo Torre?

  It is.

• 42:27Speaker 01

  It's a nice name. It, it flows nicely off the tongue. 12 a.m. on the Amalfi Coast, watching the Raptors playing preseason in Edmonton. Hard.

• 42:39Pablo Torre?

  So we're gonna do some binary scale of hard and not hard?

• 42:42Speaker 01

  Because there's different depths of description.

• 42:47Pablo Torre?

  Yes.

• 42:48Speaker 01

  Why are they playing in Edmonton? And it's preseason? There's different depths. There's things that add character to it.

• 42:55Pablo Torre?

  Absolutely, absolutely.

• 42:57Speaker 01

  For sure. Representative George Santos was charged with theft for stealing puppies from an Amish dairy farmer. That's a dud.

• 43:10Pablo Torre?

  That's just a news story.

• 43:11Speaker 01

  That's a dud.

• 43:11Pablo Torre?

  That was just a news headline.

• 43:13Speaker 01

  Just spilled an entire box of shallots in the backseat of the Uber? That could be a hook. That could definitely be a hook.

• 43:21Pablo Torre?

  That's pretty good. That's pretty good.

• 43:23Speaker 01

  It could be a **** hook. Young Drazin Petrovich with a great pair of Adidas Top 10s.

• 43:30Pablo Torre?

  It's a photo of a shirtless young Drazin Petrovich.

• 43:32Speaker 01

  You could just take Young Drazin Petrovich with and then put whatever after.

• 43:37Pablo Torre?

  Yep.

• 43:39Speaker 01

  This is a, this is rap class.

• 43:41Pablo Torre?

  I, I, I am **** taking notes.

• 43:43Speaker 01

  Girl, you got the ass of a young Vladi Divac. Hell yeah. I **** with that hard.

• 43:49Pablo Torre?

  Vladi Divac is smoking.

• 43:50Speaker 01

  That's where I would probably mention something about that or. Got the ass of a young Vladi Divac. It's heavy. I once mentioned my **** was thick like John Lovitz.

• 44:01Pablo Torre?

  Mmm. The critic.

• 44:03Speaker 01

  It's one of my favorite actors. He's thick.

• 44:06Pablo Torre?

  He is. Multiple Cs.

• 44:09Speaker 01

  Ashing a sesame bagel like a cigarette in front of a Roomba. That's just an incredible ****.

• 44:14Pablo Torre?

  It is.

• 44:15Speaker 01

  That's a visual right there.

• 44:16Pablo Torre?

  That's just poetry. Ashing a sesame bagel.

• 44:19Speaker 01

  I love that that's.

• 44:19Pablo Torre?

  In front of a Roomba.

• 44:20Speaker 01

  That type of thing that's attached to me, I'm happy about. Lizzo probably be hitting people in the knee with her flute like Tonya Harding. Meh. I actually.

• 44:34Speaker 01

  I just did a show where I was the chief support for Incubus in LA, which I don't know is a **** 18,000 people sold out show.

• 44:46Pablo Torre?

  It's an incredible sentence.

• 44:48Speaker 01

  All right, exactly. And Paris Jackson, Michael Jackson, one step away was in the dressing room next to me. And as we walk out to go do the thing, there's this woman in a tuxedo with a tail. And you know, she had like very shiny shoes on and she was holding something. And Lizzo was the special guest. So she was in front of Lizzo's dressing room, holding the flute for her.

• 45:13Pablo Torre?

  She had a, she had a flute butler.

• 45:15Speaker 01

  White glove flute but, flute but, but, white glove flute butler.

• 45:23Speaker 01

  That's a [bleep] hard line also at the bar watching Japanese youth baseball.

• 45:27Pablo Torre?

  Absolutely.

• 45:28Speaker 01

  I would word it differently, but yes, it's hard. I'm at the club showing women the Montez Sabonis DHO highlights. I know his father.

• 45:35Pablo Torre?

  Yeah, of course.

• 45:36Speaker 01

  I would be showing his... I'd be showing his father.

• 45:39Pablo Torre?

  Mmm.

• 45:40Speaker 01

  That would also be weird.

• 45:41Pablo Torre?

  Well, some of those lost tapes, though. Not even on VHS of Avita Sabonis. Oh, yeah, being ahead of his time. One of the great pastors of all time. Big men pastors.

• 45:52Speaker 01

  Not me getting [bleep] off at Beetlejuice the Musical. I like the premise of this.

• 45:57Pablo Torre?

  Well, that actually happened.

• 45:58Speaker 01

  To you? To who?

• 46:02Pablo Torre?

  Uh... It was Representative Lauren Boebert, that security video in black and white.

• 46:07Speaker 01

  The Musical?

• 46:08Pablo Torre?

  Yeah, I love... I love that I am breaking the news to you that Lauren Boebert gave, like, her date a handjob at... Through the pants. At Beetlejuice the Musical in, like, Colorado.

• 46:18Speaker 01

  Doesn't count.

• 46:18Pablo Torre?

  Yeah, fair.

• 46:20Speaker 01

  What are we, in [bleep] sixth grade? Handjob through the pants. She should [bleep] be ashamed of herself.

• 46:26Pablo Torre?

  That was not the takeaway for most people, but I see where you're coming from.

• 46:29Speaker 01

  Doing lines off a Nintendo Switch in the back of a Hyundai Sonata, yeah. I mean, I feel like... They're tapping into things like that, I would wanna say. We got big men doing cartwheels on our offense, yeah. Hard. I saw Fox eating sour cream and cheddar. Nah. I like the idea of this, though. Using animals in... Illiteration.

• 46:54Pablo Torre?

  Yes.

• 46:55Speaker 01

  Is that the right term where they're speaking as human?

• 46:58Pablo Torre?

  Oh, that's anthropomorphizing. Anthropomorphizing.

• 47:01Speaker 01

  What is alliteration?

• 47:02Pablo Torre?

  That's when the words in a row have the same first letter.

• 47:06Speaker 01

  That was totally off.

• 47:08Pablo Torre?

  You had the letter A right.

• 47:09Speaker 01

  That was... E-lliteration or alliteration?

• 47:12Pablo Torre?

  Alliteration.

• 47:13Speaker 01

  What is e-lliteration?

• 47:15Pablo Torre?

  I don't think that's a thing.

• 47:16Speaker 01

  God, I bet you it is. Someone Google that.

• 47:20Speaker 01

  Alright, that's it. I'm getting [bleep] outta here. I gotta go eat, bro. I'm done.

• 47:25Pablo Torre?

  Um... Action Bronson, thank you for being, uh... Everything I had hoped for. Can I kiss your hand?

• 47:32Speaker 01

  No, you're not, but you're gonna hug me.

• 47:34Pablo Torre?

  Okay, very...

• 47:34Speaker 01

  You're gonna hug me hard with game and grit.

• 47:52Pablo Torre?

  So what I found out today is why listening to Action Bronson makes me happy. And it's one of the first things I told him, right? "Your music makes me feel good." And the reason why, it turns out, is because he embodies this contradiction between this abiding, deep seriousness, and also the exact opposite. Often at the same time. Action Bronson loves a high-stakes scenario decorated with lowbrow details. He makes music for Don Corleone.

• 48:37Pablo Torre?

  If Don Corleone also loved the NBA. He is somebody who makes music to listen to while walking around New York City, because New York City is the greatest city in the world that also, at times, is aggressively the opposite, which is why it is worth celebrating. And so here Pablo Torre finds out a New York show that has just introduced Action Bronson to Accidental Bronson, reflecting our capacity individually to spontaneously embody this very contradiction. No matter where you are on this planet, we wanted to send you into your weekend,

• 49:22Pablo Torre?

  into your wanderings around wherever you are, with just something to listen to.

• 49:31Speaker 01

  12 a.m. on the Amalfi Coast, watching the Raptors playing preseason in Edmonton. Young Dragan Petrovic with a great pair of Adidas Top 10s. Hard. Girl, you got the ass of a young Vlade Divac. Not me getting jacked off at Beetlejuice the Musical, but at the bar watching Japanese youth baseball. We got big men doing cartwheels on our offense. Just spilled an entire box of shallots. Hard and not hard. In the backseat of the Uber, ashing a sesame bagel like a cigarette in front of a Roomba.

• 50:01Pablo Torre?

  Yes.

• 50:01Speaker 01

  And I'm putting them in a hospital, doing lines off a Nintendo Switch in the back of a Hyundai Sonata. Yeah, I could be a fucking hook. I once mentioned my b**ch was thick like John Lovitz. Multiple Cs.

• 50:14Speaker 01

  Alright, that's it. I'm getting f*** out of here. I gotta go eat, bro.

• 50:19Speaker 04

  Hard and not hard.

• 50:35Pablo Torre?

  This has been Pablo Torre Finds Out, a Meadowlark Media production. And I'll talk to you next time.

• 51:03Speaker 05

  Welcome to 215 Maple Drive. We just put this property on the market.

• 51:09Speaker 02

  Love the crown molding.

• 51:10Speaker 05

  Oh, wait until you see the walk-in closets and the bathroom tile.

• 51:14Speaker 02

  Does it have Verizon FiOS? You know, 100% fiber internet.

• 51:18Speaker 05

  No FiOS, but it looks like it's got cable. Let's check out the kitchen.

• 51:21Speaker 02

  No FiOS? Yeah... no thank you.

• 51:25Speaker 05

  Don't you want to see the rest... okay. Bye-bye. Get Verizon FiOS, because when you're moving, it's 100% or nothing.

• 51:32Speaker 03

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