CLOWN FOR HIRE Ft. Zach Noe Towers | Episode 214

Zach Noe Towers is on the show this week!! Drew and Zach talk bombing on a gay cruise, unhinged phone contact names, Zach riding motorcycles, free shoe hacks, Zach’s neighbor interviewing his hookups, Crossfit, doing the splits, and so much more. Zach IG: https://www.instagram.com/zachnoetowers/?hl=en Zach Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@zachnoetowers Follow The Comment Section on IG! https://www.instagram.com/thecommentsection/ Visithttp://heytoogoodandco.com/heytoogoodandco.com http://heytoogoodandco.com to shop now! eBay is the place for pre-loved and vintage fashion. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy https://acast.com/privacy for more information.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

  Network freedom and flexibility. That's what you want in a healthcare plan. With a Humana Medicare Advantage PPO plan, you can see any doctor in the country who accepts Medicare, including specialists. No referrals, no kidding. Learn more at gethumana.com. See any doctor who accepts Medicare and is willing to bill Humana. Humana PPOs may not be available in all areas. Benefits and costs share may vary. Humana is a Medicare Advantage PPO organization with a Medicare contract. Enrollment in any Humana plan depends on contract renewal.

• 0:32Speaker 01

  Moved out here as a demon twink at 22. Full demon twink, had my horns removed recently.

• 0:38Drew Afualo?

  Wow, I'm so happy for you. Gender-affirming care.

• 0:51Drew Afualo?

  Hey, everyone, and welcome back to another episode of the Comment Section Show, starring me, your fave, everybody knows me, who cares about me. Onto the guest today, we have the iconic, the legendary, the one, the only, Zach Nowy Towers.

• 1:04Speaker 01

  Hi.

• 1:05Drew Afualo?

  Hello.

• 1:06Speaker 01

  I love the fart sound.

• 1:07Drew Afualo?

  Oh, my gosh.

• 1:08Speaker 01

  Every episode I listen to, I'm like, I can't wait for the fart, for whatever reason.

• 1:12Drew Afualo?

  I know, I remember one time when I entered, I don't remember who it was, but I was like thinking too much about the words I was saying, and I forgot the fart sound, and I was like, damn.

• 1:21Speaker 01

  Damn.

• 1:21Drew Afualo?

  Sorry, y'all.

• 1:22Speaker 01

  Super fans know.

• 1:23Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, I'm sure someone will tell me. They're like, oh, it was this episode.

• 1:26Speaker 01

  Episode 133.

• 1:28Drew Afualo?

  This episode is presented by Too Good & Co. Creamer. My go-to coffee is an iced vanilla latte personally, but whether you enjoy your coffee hot, cold, bold, or frothy, if you want to take it up a level, Too Good Creamers make every sip a good one. Why? Because they're made with farm-fresh cream, real milk, and contain 3 grams of sugar per serving. That's 40% less than the 5 grams per serving in leading traditional coffee creamers for a rich, creamy, and delicious experience. Find Too Good Creamers in the Creamer aisle. How are you?

• 2:00Speaker 01

  I'm great. I said this before, and I said it before, so I wouldn't say it this time, but I'm so excited to be here.

• 2:05Drew Afualo?

  I'm so excited to have you.

• 2:07Speaker 01

  Oh, my god.

• 2:07Drew Afualo?

  I'm honored to have you.

• 2:08Speaker 01

  It's a dream.

• 2:09Drew Afualo?

  And you're A lot of people that you're really good friends with have been on the show.

• 2:13Speaker 01

  Oh, yes.

• 2:13Drew Afualo?

  So it was natural.

• 2:14Speaker 01

  Cause you've had Bob and like Taylor comedian girlies and stuff.

• 2:18Drew Afualo?

  The stand up queens.

• 2:20Speaker 01

  Y'all are, you are so funny.

• 2:22Drew Afualo?

  Thank you.

• 2:22Speaker 01

  Kind of make anyone funny. That's, that's, that's why people keep tuning in, I think.

• 2:26Drew Afualo?

  And that's why Taylor Thompson keeps coming because she needs my help. She desperately needs my help.

• 2:30Speaker 01

  You know the special thanks that just says Drew Fallo.

• 2:32Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, she says, and credit Drew Fallo. I made her funny.

• 2:37Drew Afualo?

  Me saying that about her, she has six Netflix specials. No, sure. That's all me. Anywho, how've you been? How's life going for you?

• 2:44Speaker 01

  Life's so good. I told you this, I turned forty recently, which has been like.

• 2:49Drew Afualo?

  Which, hello.

• 2:50Speaker 01

  Oh, no.

• 2:51Drew Afualo?

  You look amazing.

• 2:52Speaker 01

  Thank you. Security tried to drag me out of the building when I said it, but I stayed.

• 2:56Drew Afualo?

  In TikTok years, I'm, I'm a hundred and two.

• 2:59Speaker 01

  I can't with that. It, it's jarring that there's another generation already. Like, I just got in, are you Gen Z?

• 3:07Drew Afualo?

  No, I'm a millennial.

• 3:08Speaker 01

  Okay, I'm elder millennial, but it's so crazy that like alphas are coming. I'm like, I thought we're good with Gen Z, I feel like.

• 3:15Drew Afualo?

  Okay, that's enough.

• 3:16Speaker 01

  I don't think we need anymore, if I'm being honest.

• 3:18Drew Afualo?

  It's okay, no more.

• 3:19Speaker 01

  No more. Stop having babies. They're so mean to me.

• 3:24Drew Afualo?

  Babies?

• 3:25Speaker 01

  I don't know.

• 3:26Drew Afualo?

  Babies actually love me, which is ironic because I don't want kids.

• 3:29Speaker 01

  Oh, me neither.

• 3:30Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, I don't want kids, but I'm like, I, I'm a magnet for kids. They love me.

• 3:34Speaker 01

  Well, because you give fun aunt.

• 3:36Drew Afualo?

  No, it's true. But I also think it's like, maybe it's an opposites attract thing.

• 3:41Speaker 01

  Or like cats find the person they don't.

• 3:43Drew Afualo?

  Right, exactly. That's why I'm like, I think they can sense, I don't really, I'm not really fucking with my own. Yeah, so then they're like, oh, she's cool. You know what I mean?

• 3:51Speaker 01

  Yeah, you pass the vibe check.

• 3:52Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, I'm, I'm really, we have a mutual understanding, me and children.

• 3:56Speaker 01

  There's also nothing better than, I have one friend, Maddie from high school, who's actually now the principal of that high school.

• 4:02Drew Afualo?

  That's crazy.

• 4:03Speaker 01

  Isn't that crazy?

• 4:04Drew Afualo?

  That is insane.

• 4:05Speaker 01

  I could ruin her in a second. I could be like, you guys know what she did when we were your age? She mixed beer with root beer.

• 4:13Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, I'm gonna go start rumors at that high school.

• 4:15Speaker 01

  Not rumors, honey. I have flash photography evidence. We used to, digital cameras were a thing.

• 4:21Drew Afualo?

  Right, at the time, yeah.

• 4:23Speaker 01

  But she has a child and tangentially, I'm giving, getting the uncle vibe from this child. And the child is obsessed with me.

• 4:30Drew Afualo?

  Oh, I love that.

• 4:31Speaker 01

  We love that.

• 4:32Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, that's, that's my vibe. I was like, I want to be a fun, rich aunt. So like, that's me.

• 4:37Speaker 01

  They light up when they see you, because they know they're getting money, or like a vape.

• 4:40Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, or something, a killer ass present. Like, I'm gonna, I'm gonna kill. And I'm gonna get the most annoying gifts for them.

• 4:47Speaker 01

  You're gonna also probably have to ask the parents, like, is it okay if I get them the thing? Like, I don't want them to like, turn on you, but like, I can get them the thing.

• 4:55Drew Afualo?

  Right, I'm gonna best their parents every year. I think the only friend I can think of right now that wants kids, off the top of my head, Caleb. I know Caleb wants children, so I'm like, oh, I'm gonna be the best aunt ever.

• 5:06Speaker 01

  I don't know Caleb, but if you're listening, I will do anything to be your friend. He's so funny.

• 5:12Drew Afualo?

  Don't, he sucks.

• 5:15Drew Afualo?

  Take it from me, it's taxing.

• 5:17Speaker 01

  What would he say about you, Drew?

• 5:18Drew Afualo?

  He would say I'm an angel and I'm perfect.

• 5:20Speaker 01

  Okay, yeah, that's what I thought.

• 5:21Drew Afualo?

  And he, and he would say he's attracted to me. So that's what he would say, honestly.

• 5:26Speaker 01

  The child of you two, crazy. Might be, might be the Antichrist, might be Jesus.

• 5:31Drew Afualo?

  Honestly, we joked about that, like, because I'm sure he has a harem of women that would be a surrogate for him. But I literally told Caleb, I was like, I don't want to do that, but like, if you put your, your sperm with my egg in my body, that baby would go to the NFL.

• 5:45Speaker 01

  Oh, my god.

• 5:46Drew Afualo?

  That baby would be a Hall of Famer.

• 5:47Speaker 01

  Are the linebackers the big ones?

• 5:49Drew Afualo?

  Yeah. They're all big, but yeah.

• 5:51Speaker 01

  Yeah, no, I know, that's so true. I come up to like, their knee, yeah.

• 5:54Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, and Caleb's really tall, and I'm tall.

• 5:56Speaker 01

  Is Caleb tall?

• 5:57Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, Caleb's like, I want to say like, 6'3".

• 6:00Speaker 01

  Oh, that's a man.

• 6:01Drew Afualo?

  I think a lot of people don't think that he's very tall, but he is.

• 6:04Speaker 01

  I see him sitting most of the time.

• 6:05Drew Afualo?

  Well, and I think they think I'm small, which I have said many, many, many times, I am not short.

• 6:11Speaker 01

  I'm deceivingly fast.

• 6:12Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, and.

• 6:13Speaker 01

  Yeah, what was it though? Did I say it wrong?

• 6:15Drew Afualo?

  No, it was, um...

• 6:17Speaker 01

  Deceptively fast.

• 6:19Drew Afualo?

  Deceptively fast, yeah.

• 6:21Speaker 01

  Put that on the Wikipedia.

• 6:22Drew Afualo?

  I know, they're like, believe it or not, this big bitch can move. Like, that's really what they wrote on my, on my player profile. No, for real, you are an avid listener, period. Oh, that was with Cat Cohen.

• 6:33Speaker 01

  Oh, Cat Cohen is so funny. Also, my, my only goal for this episode is to, um, become liked by Jennifer Pritchett Realtor.

• 6:41Drew Afualo?

  Oh, JPR? That's Carrie's mom.

• 6:44Speaker 01

  Get out. What's her vibe? Is she, does she like gay people or is she kinda like?

• 6:49Drew Afualo?

  She loves gay people.

• 6:51Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 6:52Drew Afualo?

  That's her gay daughter.

• 6:54Speaker 01

  I'm coming for you.

• 6:55Drew Afualo?

  Jen, and Jen is also my, like, number one listener.

• 6:59Speaker 01

  That's, that's the vibe I got, yeah.

• 7:01Drew Afualo?

  She is my number one fan.

• 7:02Speaker 01

  Yeah, I know what I'm doing.

• 7:03Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 7:04Speaker 01

  I'm gonna get her and everyone else is gonna fall into place.

• 7:07Drew Afualo?

  I know, with Kyle McLaughlin, it was very, like, kismet with him. Like, having, cause she was such a huge fan of him, it was so funny. And like, like a year before he started, like, posting a lot on TikTok and stuff and doing the podcast, she had told Carrie, cause Carrie's also my assistant, she had told Carrie, like, you know who Drew should have? Kyle McLaughlin. And we, we were like, that's so random.

• 7:28Speaker 01

  Bag had Kyle McLaughlin, yeah.

• 7:30Drew Afualo?

  And then we did end up having him and he is a delight.

• 7:33Speaker 01

  He was, I, now I feel creepy that I listen to the, a pod.

• 7:36Drew Afualo?

  It's okay, I've had people like that.

• 7:38Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 7:39Drew Afualo?

  No, no, I just had my friend.

• 7:40Speaker 01

  She's like the other elderly guest.

• 7:42Drew Afualo?

  No, no, no, my friend Blake, who's the same age as me, he also referenced my show a ton.

• 7:46Speaker 01

  Okay, great.

• 7:47Drew Afualo?

  Which I love, are you kidding?

• 7:48Speaker 01

  Well, you're a good time, you're everything I want more of. You know how, like, it becomes nauseating to hear a, a straight male comedian speak?

• 7:56Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 7:56Speaker 01

  You're like the antidote.

• 7:58Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, thank you.

• 7:59Speaker 01

  So like, if I, you obviously.

• 8:00Drew Afualo?

  I'm like the, yeah. I save everyone, EpiPen, for real.

• 8:05Speaker 01

  You're saving lives.

• 8:06Drew Afualo?

  Yes, I am, thank you so much for recognizing.

• 8:08Speaker 01

  You're making Taylor Tomlinson what she is, and you're, and you're saving us peasants.

• 8:12Drew Afualo?

  God, I am so busy.

• 8:13Speaker 01

  You're busy?

• 8:14Drew Afualo?

  I'm propping up her, Caleb, oh, God, everybody. Just kidding, well, I wanna talk more about you, I wanna talk about stand-up. Just, I really wanna know how you got into stand-up, like, what was the genesis of you entering the field?

• 8:25Speaker 01

  So, actually, you'll love this, because I know you like musical theater.

• 8:28Drew Afualo?

  I do.

• 8:28Speaker 01

  I was a musical theater kid from 10 to 22, I went to college for it.

• 8:31Drew Afualo?

  No way?

• 8:32Speaker 01

  Yes, so my tap shoes are in my closet, I will do some time steps for you if you want.

• 8:37Drew Afualo?

  And you can sing?

• 8:38Speaker 01

  Technically, but I'm, like, now I've, it's, I haven't sang for so long, that it's just like private shows in my car.

• 8:45Drew Afualo?

  And I bet that means you can sing.

• 8:47Speaker 01

  Not. I'm okay. I'm okay. I'm okay.

• 8:50Drew Afualo?

  Is he being humble? Yes, he's being humble.

• 8:53Speaker 01

  My little sister's here. Which is also scary, because she can backtrack me in a way that no one else can.

• 8:59Drew Afualo?

  And you want to be a Broadway baby?

• 9:01Speaker 01

  Well, I would do that, but I want to do TV and film.

• 9:03Drew Afualo?

  Okay, TV.

• 9:04Speaker 01

  All this to say, I did musical theater from 10 to 22. And I went to college because I thought I had to go to college.

• 9:10Drew Afualo?

  I feel you.

• 9:11Speaker 01

  You missed that maybe by like, that's our 10-year difference. Like, we were like, which college are you going to? Not like, are you going to college?

• 9:19Drew Afualo?

  I see, I see.

• 9:19Speaker 01

  And it's like, well, if I go, and if I'm gonna have loans, I'm gonna know how to do a triple pirouette.

• 9:24Drew Afualo?

  Right, amen.

• 9:25Speaker 01

  Most expensive triple I've ever done.

• 9:27Drew Afualo?

  So I'm gonna get my money's worth. I'm gonna go learn a skill.

• 9:29Speaker 01

  Sally Mae? Sally who?

• 9:33Speaker 01

  So, went to college for musical theater, knowing the whole time I wanted to do TV and film. Moved out here as a demon twink at 22. Full demon twink, had my horns removed recently.

• 9:44Drew Afualo?

  Wow, I'm so happy for you. Gender-affirming care?

• 9:51Drew Afualo?

  Love that for you.

• 9:52Speaker 01

  Please also have your twink spayed and neutered, if you have a, yeah.

• 9:56Drew Afualo?

  Make sure. Have to.

• 9:58Speaker 01

  You don't need them reproducing. But I really got lost in the sauce. Coming out here, I wanted to act. I had like, commercial agent, but it's so... Do you audition for commercials?

• 10:10Speaker 01

  You don't have to, you get offered them.

• 10:11Drew Afualo?

  No. I mean, I've done, I've done commercials, but I don't, they're commercials for social, so I feel like it's a little different.

• 10:16Speaker 01

  Got it. And you're like, the targeted thing. Like, okay. So with commercials, it's like, I would call off work to audition for like, a paper towel commercial.

• 10:24Drew Afualo?

  Right.

• 10:25Speaker 01

  Maybe get a callback, call off work again, not get it, be down money, and be like, I don't even want to be in a paper towel commercial. Like, you feel crazy after a while. You're like, what am I doing?

• 10:36Drew Afualo?

  I get what you mean, yeah.

• 10:37Speaker 01

  So I started doing stand-up. And, because I had the stage experience, I was immediately comfortable on stage. And there's something so gratifying about writing a dumb little joke about my butthole in the morning, thinking about it in the afternoon, trying it at night, and being like, wow, 400 people laughed at my butthole joke. And then, 46 years later, you do a special.

• 11:03Speaker 01

  So yeah, it's just been like, standup's been the one constant that like, I feel like I have so much control over.

• 11:09Drew Afualo?

  Totally.

• 11:10Speaker 01

  And it's, it's so fun. Like, I opened for Taylor and Bob and Fortune. Crazy, yeah. I've been their opener on all their theater tours.

• 11:18Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 11:18Speaker 01

  And it's a dream. Like skipping out on stage, making 2,000 people laugh and then skipping off to eat like buffalo wings while they do their hour.

• 11:26Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 11:27Speaker 01

  It's the dream.

• 11:27Drew Afualo?

  That's so amazing. What's your favorite part of the process of like creating? The jokes, like writing them?

• 11:33Speaker 01

  Oh, I mean.

• 11:34Drew Afualo?

  Is it performing?

• 11:35Speaker 01

  I get really scared to try stuff, but it's like when the thing works. It's that la- I'm good, I'm in it for the laugh.

• 11:42Drew Afualo?

  I get it.

• 11:42Speaker 01

  If science makes like a pill or a shot, like or a GLP-7 that like makes me feel like laughter makes me feel, I'm a overdose.

• 11:50Drew Afualo?

  I get that. I totally get that. I love making people laugh, so.

• 11:54Speaker 01

  You do your pod.

• 11:55Drew Afualo?

  Yes.

• 11:56Speaker 01

  Live on tour.

• 11:57Drew Afualo?

  With my sister, yeah.

• 11:57Speaker 01

  And you've dabbled in standup?

• 11:59Drew Afualo?

  Yes, I have.

• 11:59Speaker 01

  But ultimately, you're like, maybe not?

• 12:01Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, I think for standup, I think it's more so just all of the things I have going on currently. I have to like, I just, one, I also know standup requires like a lot of manpower. Like, it's like a lot of man hours dedicated. So it's really like to go and get used to it and like really figure out your hour. Like, and, and even just like workshopping like five, 10.

• 12:23Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 12:23Drew Afualo?

  20, 30, like, all of it, I was like, I just don't know if this is the, the medium for me. I do love making people laugh.

• 12:30Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 12:30Drew Afualo?

  Like, especially live. So that's why I love performing live with my sister. Um, next time we have a show, I would love for you to come, if you'd like to come.

• 12:36Speaker 01

  Yes!

• 12:37Drew Afualo?

  Um, but it's all.

• 12:38Speaker 01

  And be under the table?

• 12:38Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 12:39Speaker 01

  Tickling your feet?

• 12:43Drew Afualo?

  I'm like, that's just Zach. He just does that.

• 12:46Speaker 01

  Let him, let him.

• 12:47Drew Afualo?

  It's okay, it's okay. I have a certificate for him.

• 12:50Speaker 01

  But it's so funny too that you accomplished the same goal that it takes me like a year just by being yourself on stage. You're very off the cuff, very funny. Well.

• 13:01Drew Afualo?

  Thank you. I appreciate it.

• 13:02Speaker 01

  I knew I was gonna suck your dick this whole episode.

• 13:05Drew Afualo?

  And honestly, if you can believe it, that's a requirement to be on the show. So it's all right. I'm glad I got, I'm glad I didn't have to bring it up.

• 13:10Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 13:11Drew Afualo?

  You made it far less awkward.

• 13:12Speaker 01

  Yeah. I'm a slut like that.

• 13:16Speaker 01

  I was gonna do it anyway.

• 13:18Drew Afualo?

  Well, even when I talked to Taylor about doing stand up, she was like, don't do that. And we laughed, and she was like, that's, that's going backwards.

• 13:24Speaker 01

  I was gonna say, I love how much respect you have for it, in that it really does, there's no way to skip it.

• 13:31Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

• 13:32Speaker 01

  You have to be in the trenches.

• 13:34Drew Afualo?

  Exactly.

• 13:34Speaker 01

  You have to fucking fail.

• 13:36Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 13:36Speaker 01

  And the best part about doing it, the way we did it, was we were nobodies.

• 13:40Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 13:40Speaker 01

  Who fumbled in bar shows. You are somebody.

• 13:43Drew Afualo?

  Somebody, yeah, so it's harder.

• 13:45Speaker 01

  Someone would love to get Drew, like messing up a joke.

• 13:48Drew Afualo?

  That's what I'm saying, like me bombing.

• 13:50Speaker 01

  Oh my god.

• 13:51Drew Afualo?

  No, for real. That's why I was very like, and that is like genuinely how I feel about stand up. I love stand up. I love watching. And I love consuming it. I love laughing. So I'm like, it's, it's a medium I've had a very high respect for, for a very long time. And so I truly do think to get good, you have to put in the hours. And like, I just can't anymore. And I also kind of talked to Caleb about this too, when I opened for him a little bit, but I was telling him, like, I also can't, like, I know my audience. So like, if I advertise, I'm gonna go do stand up somewhere, I know they're gonna show up. And then I know they're gonna laugh at anything I say. Which is great, and I believe you, I believe you think I'm funny, but I really want to find out for real if I'm funny.

• 14:32Speaker 01

  Totally.

• 14:32Drew Afualo?

  I literally can't because I don't have anonymity. So like, it is one of those things. So.

• 14:38Speaker 01

  Sorry, your diamonds are so shiny.

• 14:40Drew Afualo?

  Oh, my steak is too juicy, my lobster's too buttery. Oh, god. And you know what, like, and maybe we.

• 14:46Speaker 01

  I just can't stop making money.

• 14:50Drew Afualo?

  And maybe, honestly, maybe more influencers should be like, I don't, this doesn't need me.

• 14:55Speaker 01

  Totally.

• 14:55Drew Afualo?

  This doesn't need me. Like, that's, and that's really how I see it. I'm like, you guys don't need me. You're doing great. You're doing great.

• 15:00Speaker 01

  It would probably like ruin watching stand up for you.

• 15:04Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 15:04Speaker 01

  The whole time I'm watching stand up, I'm like, huh huh.

• 15:11Speaker 01

  And then I turn it off. But even like my brilliant friends, I like 20 minutes is enough. I don't need to see an hour, but I do stand up all the time.

• 15:20Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, and you're constantly in it. What's like been the funniest like show you've ever had where you're like, that was crazy that that happened? Have you got any crazy audience members or anything?

• 15:31Speaker 01

  Yeah, definitely. What comes to mind is my biggest bomb was...

• 15:37Drew Afualo?

  Your biggest bomb is what came to mind?

• 15:39Speaker 01

  I mean, just like crazy in that it just stands, it was trauma, lowercase t-trauma.

• 15:45Drew Afualo?

  Lowercase, but still trauma.

• 15:47Speaker 01

  We can laugh, feel free to laugh.

• 15:50Speaker 01

  But it was my first paid gig ever. I was in my twenties. It was a gay cruise. I was still drinking and doing drugs. I'm sober now.

• 15:55Drew Afualo?

  Okay, look at you.

• 15:57Speaker 01

  10 years, isn't that crazy?

• 15:58Drew Afualo?

  Congratulations.

• 15:59Speaker 01

  But I was still very much in my cups and it was this older gay cruise and I told an AIDS joke.

• 16:09Speaker 01

  And they almost threw me off the boat. Yeah, I see. Yeah, the comedians loved it. That's actually where Bob and I met. Bob was hosting those shows. Bob's cackling in the back. The other comedians, they love that men are actively about to like hunt me down.

• 16:28Drew Afualo?

  But I get what you mean. Like I literally said going into stand up, I like literally, when I was gonna try, I was like, I just really don't want to find out the hard way I'm not funny like that. Like, because there is a difference between being like internet funny and live stage performance funny.

• 16:43Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 16:44Drew Afualo?

  So like I really do, and I mean in the world of influencers. Like they have a knack of telling people, you're so funny, you should do stand up.

• 16:52Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 16:52Drew Afualo?

  And then they go and they bomb.

• 16:54Speaker 01

  It's so different.

• 16:55Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, it's a completely different art form.

• 16:57Speaker 01

  And in that like the funniest comedian can still eat a bag of dicks.

• 17:01Drew Afualo?

  Right, exactly.

• 17:02Speaker 01

  Just depending on the mood of the crowd.

• 17:04Drew Afualo?

  No, totally.

• 17:05Speaker 01

  This is the worst crowd work interaction. I had a joke about like, oh, the joke was similar. I was like, gating gay dudes is hard, am I right ladies? And this woman goes, yep, it's way harder than you think. And I was like, uh oh, someone got dumped by her gay boyfriend. And she was like, no, he was my husband. And I was like, oh, you married a gay guy? Damn, how'd that end? And she goes, he killed himself.

• 17:34Drew Afualo?

  And then you go, hmm, well, that kinda took the wind out of the sails.

• 17:39Speaker 01

  I go, Drew, I literally went, I'm not a good enough comedian to navigate this. I was so honest.

• 17:46Drew Afualo?

  I'd like to phone a friend.

• 17:47Speaker 01

  Yeah, well, she was wrong and I was like, ah, and she's like, do you wanna see a picture of him? I was like, I'm legally required to say yes, like, I'm not gonna say no. So she brings up, I'm gonna get in trouble. She brings up the camera on her phone and I go, oh my god, he's so handsome, you guys. He's swinging from a rope.

• 18:07Speaker 01

  And the crowd loved it.

• 18:10Drew Afualo?

  And they died.

• 18:11Speaker 01

  And they died.

• 18:12Drew Afualo?

  And it killed, it killed them.

• 18:14Speaker 01

  If you were to rate how I'm doing so far, what would you say?

• 18:17Drew Afualo?

  How you're doing so far? What's the, what's the measure of rating? Is it like stars, is it number?

• 18:22Speaker 01

  Um, let's do number of stars.

• 18:25Drew Afualo?

  Okay, out of five?

• 18:27Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 18:27Drew Afualo?

  Okay, I'll give you, as of right now, at this mark, I would say I'd give you a three.

• 18:32Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 18:32Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 18:33Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 18:34Drew Afualo?

  I think you're doing great.

• 18:34Speaker 01

  This gives me someplace to move.

• 18:36Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, so somewhere to improve. Somewhere to improve, yeah.

• 18:41Speaker 01

  Okay, and I will be self-harming in the car.

• 18:46Drew Afualo?

  No, I'd give you a five.

• 18:48Speaker 01

  No, well, now you're pandering and that's okay.

• 18:50Drew Afualo?

  Well, see, I was, I knew you were gonna say I was pandering, so I tried to, you know, put some buffer.

• 18:55Speaker 01

  Three's kinda far. Three's, we have, we have decimals in there too, like, a four point two.

• 19:01Drew Afualo?

  Well, damn bitch, I asked you for the scale.

• 19:02Speaker 01

  I know. I'm just kidding.

• 19:06Drew Afualo?

  What's your, okay, what's your favorite city to perform in? I like to ask stand-ups that, cuz the, the answers are so different across the board.

• 19:13Speaker 01

  Um, probably Chicago.

• 19:14Drew Afualo?

  Fun.

• 19:15Speaker 01

  Chicago's a good time.

• 19:16Drew Afualo?

  Ooh, okay.

• 19:17Speaker 01

  Cuz you've got, they are all alcoholics, so they're like, already rowdy, and I will say that to all their faces.

• 19:25Speaker 01

  But they're midwestern nice.

• 19:26Drew Afualo?

  Okay, that's true.

• 19:27Speaker 01

  So they're like polite, and they're kinda like jovial, that's been my experience at least.

• 19:31Drew Afualo?

  Down to have a good, good time.

• 19:32Speaker 01

  Yeah, Tacoma has been fun.

• 19:34Drew Afualo?

  Ooh.

• 19:34Speaker 01

  Boston is great.

• 19:36Drew Afualo?

  Oh, really? I'm, I'm doing Boston in November.

• 19:38Speaker 01

  Oh, I don't wanna jinx it, but like, Boston's a good time.

• 19:42Drew Afualo?

  No, you're right, I've actually already performed in Boston, so yeah.

• 19:44Speaker 01

  They're gonna love you too.

• 19:44Drew Afualo?

  Okay, see.

• 19:45Speaker 01

  Cuz of the loud thing.

• 19:47Drew Afualo?

  That's true.

• 19:49Drew Afualo?

  Cause they got a bunch of loud bitches over there.

• 19:50Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 19:51Drew Afualo?

  That's true, the itis that I have.

• 19:53Speaker 01

  That's the loud itis.

• 19:54Drew Afualo?

  That's true. That's, what's the, your least favorite city to perform in?

• 19:58Speaker 01

  Um, I will only say Kansas City because I had a bad experience there.

• 20:03Drew Afualo?

  Why?

• 20:03Speaker 01

  Um, well, it's just this thing where it's like, you know, you fly across the country to spread your art and your love and make people better? I went to Kansas City and there was a drunk, loud girl, dead center, who just kept talking to me.

• 20:20Drew Afualo?

  Oh my god.

• 20:20Speaker 01

  And it threw off every single joke.

• 20:23Drew Afualo?

  Like, like you were trying, she was trying to have a conversation with you?

• 20:25Speaker 01

  Yes. She was like answering rhetorical questions, kind of adding some color to what I already said.

• 20:31Drew Afualo?

  She's giving context to your story.

• 20:33Speaker 01

  And this is my thing too. I never get negative hecklers. I get hecklers who love me and want me to know that they're in the room.

• 20:43Speaker 01

  She's like, tell him, Zach. Uh oh, what'd he do? And I'm just like.

• 20:52Drew Afualo?

  You're like, mama, shut up. Mom! Mom, I told you to stop coming to my shows. Mom, I literally told you to stop coming to my fucking shows.

• 20:59Speaker 01

  Oh my god, but yeah.

• 21:01Drew Afualo?

  Tell him.

• 21:03Speaker 01

  Tell him.

• 21:03Drew Afualo?

  You're like, uh oh, what did he do?

• 21:04Speaker 01

  Uh oh, no. He did what?

• 21:10Drew Afualo?

  It's throwing off your timing and everything.

• 21:11Speaker 01

  Everything. I'm like one of those comics who like, I get my jokes down to like, as clean as I can, like not clean content, but like clean, like no extra words.

• 21:19Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 21:20Speaker 01

  So if someone's trying to be conversational with me, it's a jarring turn.

• 21:24Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, especially with, with your timing. Like if you're trying to wait to give the punchline and she's talking during.

• 21:29Speaker 01

  She's talking. What happened?

• 21:33Speaker 01

  And I'm like, fucking, I'm about to say it!

• 21:38Drew Afualo?

  Just wait!

• 21:39Speaker 01

  Yes!

• 21:40Drew Afualo?

  You ever heard of a punchline, bitch?

• 21:42Speaker 01

  I'm a punch.

• 21:42Drew Afualo?

  Oh my god.

• 21:43Speaker 01

  You.

• 21:44Drew Afualo?

  I'm gonna punch something if you don't be quiet. That is so funny. I've talked about that before. I actually recently, my sister and I did a live show in LA, like a month ago, or no, in January.

• 21:57Speaker 01

  Do you think fondly of doing LA shows?

• 21:59Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 22:00Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 22:00Drew Afualo?

  I mean, LA crowds are good. I think they're fun.

• 22:02Speaker 01

  It's scary though, because it's like, you're homie. It's like, it's like the people, like-

• 22:06Drew Afualo?

  Yeah. A lot of our friends come to our LA shows too.

• 22:10Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 22:10Drew Afualo?

  So that is like, one of those. But it's more so, LA is really fun, but I feel like we had kick ass shows in like Portland, like they were fucking awesome.

• 22:19Speaker 01

  Oh, Portland is great.

• 22:20Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, Portland, New York was great, like opening night. It's funny too, because I like to say this, like, I found out doing tour, like, and doing live comedy, that there are jokes that kill in certain cities, and then they just do not hit in other cities, for whatever reason, because they're not geographical, like, necessarily, but like, there was one I told in New York, in opening night, because I was like, they're gonna die at this joke. And it was like, basically the first time I saw road rage, like, in New York, and we were in like, I did a brand thing, they sent this like, they're like, oh, we'll send a car. And there's like, four of us, so we figured it was like, an SUV, right, something. They sent a ridiculous, like, party bus that had like, flashing lights-

• 23:02Speaker 01

  Stop.

• 23:02Drew Afualo?

  And no tint on the windows. So we were like, sitting, and it's like a club on wheels, and like, we're just sitting in silence, like, looking at each other.

• 23:09Speaker 01

  That feels very Christian. Like, let's, let's keep things above the belt, like-

• 23:13Drew Afualo?

  No, super, like, with no tint either, so we were like-

• 23:16Speaker 01

  That's crazy.

• 23:17Drew Afualo?

  In a school bus club, like, and it's like going, and the guy was a terrible driver, he hit several cars.

• 23:22Speaker 01

  No.

• 23:23Drew Afualo?

  And he like, at one point, almost-

• 23:24Speaker 01

  Well, you're an accomplice. You're an accomplice.

• 23:26Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, literally, we're like, we're witnessing crimes, as we're driving, and like, he gets into an altercation-

• 23:32Speaker 01

  Killed the biker.

• 23:32Drew Afualo?

  For real. He hit someone. He like, gets into a confrontation with like, another driver, they both roll down their windows, and he's like, cussing at it. Mind you, he's in like, a three-piece suit. And so he's like, they're like, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you. Yeah, and then, he literally was like, learn how to fucking drive, to our driver, and he goes, "Ya mother", and then rolls the window up really fast, and we, that joke, killed. Like, in New York, it fucking killed. And like, I kept referencing, I kept going back to it, "Ya mother",

• 24:01Speaker 01

  Ya mother.

• 24:01Drew Afualo?

  Just to everything, and they were dying. The next day, we did Boston, I think, next day, yeah. Boston brought up you mother crickets.

• 24:09Speaker 01

  Different culture.

• 24:10Drew Afualo?

  Not one laugh.

• 24:10Speaker 01

  Different culture.

• 24:11Drew Afualo?

  I thought maybe because they're a little close, maybe.

• 24:13Speaker 01

  Yeah, like east coast.

• 24:15Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 24:15Speaker 01

  Big city.

• 24:17Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, I was thinking yelling.

• 24:18Speaker 01

  Damn.

• 24:19Drew Afualo?

  Road rage. Nothing.

• 24:20Speaker 01

  Nothing.

• 24:21Drew Afualo?

  Yeah. I did that too with a Planet of the Apes joke. It killed in Dallas, didn't kill in Houston.

• 24:26Speaker 01

  It killed on the Planet of the Apes.

• 24:28Drew Afualo?

  It was like the zoo, they ate that one up.

• 24:31Speaker 01

  They were throwing poo, they were going.

• 24:34Drew Afualo?

  And they were laughing.

• 24:36Speaker 01

  Wait, but also, so you know the ceiling, nothing worse than ha, ha, ha, ha. That's so funny. Ha, ha, ha. Oh my god, they're gonna die. Oh my god, ha. To crickets?

• 24:44Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 24:45Speaker 01

  It's like, put me in the looney bin. Like, give me a straitjacket.

• 24:48Drew Afualo?

  I know.

• 24:49Speaker 01

  I can't be trusted.

• 24:50Drew Afualo?

  It does feel like.

• 24:52Speaker 01

  I was wrong!

• 24:56Drew Afualo?

  Especially when you hype it in your head.

• 24:58Speaker 01

  Yes!

• 24:59Drew Afualo?

  You're like, they're gonna die. And like, the one in Dallas was, we watched Planet of the Apes. We love the, the movies.

• 25:04Speaker 01

  Wait, what is the Planet of the Apes thing?

• 25:05Drew Afualo?

  The, like, the joke I made, basically, it's like the movie franchise. We love the movies, we watch them on the tour bus. In Dallas, uh, like, when we come out, we do, like, the same intro every single time. And they all cheer with us, like, because they're mentally ill, like us.

• 25:21Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 25:21Drew Afualo?

  So they like, they almost like mimic, like us, so they did the exact same thing. And in the movies, they go, apes together, strong. Like, every single time, they do something in unison, they go, apes together, strong. And I made that joke killed. So like, the entire night, I kept going back to that well. And so then the next night, we're in Houston, still in Texas. I'm assuming you guys have.

• 25:43Speaker 01

  The same, copy paste, copy paste, copy paste.

• 25:45Drew Afualo?

  And then not one laugh. Not one. It was actually really quiet. And then I went, oh, not Planet of the Apes fans? No worries. No worries. No worries. Actually, it's no worries. I'm gonna kill that joke. No worries.

• 25:55Speaker 01

  The well's dry.

• 25:56Drew Afualo?

  Yeah. And then I told it again in Portland, and it killed. So it's very random.

• 26:01Speaker 01

  It can't be trusted.

• 26:02Drew Afualo?

  No, it can't. Did you have one, jokes like that? Hit in some cities, not in others.

• 26:07Speaker 01

  All of them.

• 26:08Drew Afualo?

  Do you have one that hits in every city? Or a topic that tends to hit?

• 26:11Speaker 01

  Yeah, I mean, like, anything, my, the, every comedian I think has like their top tier bits and jokes that are like pretty trustworthy, like, they're, they're broad, maybe they're, oh, you said this one, like, my mom is a lesbian. In my opinion.

• 26:26Drew Afualo?

  Congratulations.

• 26:27Speaker 01

  And, big laugh.

• 26:29Drew Afualo?

  You said, "In my opinion."

• 26:30Speaker 01

  Yeah, "In my opinion," big laugh. Every time I've ever said it, big laugh.

• 26:34Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 26:34Speaker 01

  Um, but then, yeah, and local, people love local jokes.

• 26:38Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, that's true.

• 26:39Speaker 01

  You would've said the dumbest thing about like Boston cream pies or something, and they would've all orgasmed at the exact same time. They would've been like...

• 26:48Drew Afualo?

  I would've had one big uproar.

• 26:49Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 26:50Drew Afualo?

  I did make one joke when we were there, because we were in Somerville, which is like, right outside of Boston.

• 26:55Speaker 01

  Is it rich?

• 26:56Drew Afualo?

  Or like, right outside of the main, no.

• 26:58Speaker 01

  Oh, okay.

• 26:58Drew Afualo?

  But it's like, right outside the main city, but I kept just saying Boston, and then they were like...

• 27:03Speaker 01

  It's Somerville.

• 27:04Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, Somerville, and I go, "Do you guys give a fuck about that? Because I don't," and then they laughed.

• 27:09Speaker 01

  Great.

• 27:09Drew Afualo?

  I was like, "I'm gonna call you Boston, that's your name now, your name's Boston."

• 27:12Speaker 01

  Thank you. And you wish, also. And also, you wish.

• 27:17Drew Afualo?

  What's been, uh, one of your favorite moments of tour? Because you mentioned you've been, uh, opening for some pretty hilarious people like yourself.

• 27:24Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 27:24Drew Afualo?

  What's been some of your favorite moments on tour?

• 27:26Speaker 01

  It's, well, Bob had a tour bus.

• 27:30Drew Afualo?

  Oh, fun.

• 27:31Speaker 01

  And everyone like warned me, "Tour bus rough is li-" uh, "Tour bus life is rough."

• 27:37Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 27:37Speaker 01

  Uh, there's the whole like, "Don't poop on the tour bus," there are all these like warnings.

• 27:41Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 27:42Speaker 01

  And then, I got in there, I had the top bunk, it was six, or three.

• 27:46Drew Afualo?

  Yes, I had one like that, too.

• 27:48Speaker 01

  I was, uh, the penthouse. Um, and it blasted the AC like on me.

• 27:53Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 27:54Speaker 01

  Pitch black cubby, rocking, I was in heaven. They had to pry me off that goddamn bus.

• 27:59Drew Afualo?

  You're so real for that, because we also were so afraid of the bus, like, because we heard the same thing.

• 28:03Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 28:03Drew Afualo?

  It's really hard, no pooping, that kind of thing.

• 28:05Speaker 01

  Oh, the turns in the middle of the night, like, rock my ass to sleep.

• 28:08Drew Afualo?

  No, we, every time it left, we felt heartbroken, like, when we would have to fly ahead, we'd be like, "My Shayla."

• 28:14Speaker 01

  Come back.

• 28:16Drew Afualo?

  It was the best. I loved the bus.

• 28:18Speaker 01

  And it's, it's, um, sleepover vibes.

• 28:20Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 28:21Speaker 01

  So you're like, are you still awake?

• 28:22Drew Afualo?

  No, literally, that's how we were too. And I was in the back room. It's really funny too, cause me and Days both have bracelets. Like, we wear a lot of jewelry. And so the girls on the bus were like, I always knew who was up, cause the jingling sounds different. Like, my jingling sounds more like Jingle Bells, and hers sounds like, uh, like ceramic. Like, more than anything. So they'd be like, oh, that's Jason. That's not true. That's Jason.

• 28:44Speaker 01

  And I just have like a foghorn. Every time.

• 28:47Speaker 01

  I'm getting up.

• 28:48Drew Afualo?

  We were like, we would like, text in our, uh, group chat all the time while we were all laying on the bus. And like, having fun. Like, one night, one of our friends on the bus, she was in a bad mood, so she went to bed early. And then we stayed up late, and we were making fun of Carrie's exes on the bus, and we were laughing. And we laughed for hours, and we were like, taking pictures of like, stupid shit we were doing. And then a couple days later, our other friend who went to bed early, she was like, when did you guys do that? And you, Jason was like, oh, you went to your bunk that night. We were all having fun in the living room. While we were driving, you went to your bunk.

• 29:21Speaker 01

  You went to your bunk.

• 29:24Drew Afualo?

  It was so fun, though.

• 29:25Speaker 01

  I.

• 29:26Drew Afualo?

  The bus was te-

• 29:27Speaker 01

  Take me back.

• 29:27Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 29:28Speaker 01

  Taylor threatened to do that two summers ago. Um, I know, well, a good threat.

• 29:33Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 29:33Speaker 01

  Um, to do a bus tour with, uh, me and her friend Sophie Buddle, who you should also have.

• 29:38Drew Afualo?

  Ooh, love.

• 29:39Speaker 01

  She's so funny, but, she, and she was gonna do like, a, uh, a tour across the Midwest. And it didn't happen, but I still kind of like, pray that it does.

• 29:47Drew Afualo?

  Oh, I'm sure it will.

• 29:48Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 29:48Drew Afualo?

  She loves to tour.

• 29:49Speaker 01

  Oh my.

• 29:49Drew Afualo?

  She loves to go on tour.

• 29:50Speaker 01

  She's stand-up, one hundred percent.

• 29:54Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, she is.

• 29:54Speaker 01

  Like, she's, she's been offered the parts and things. She's been, you know.

• 29:58Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 29:58Speaker 01

  Asked to do other stuff. She, she's a stand-up girly.

• 30:01Drew Afualo?

  No, she is, and she's really fucking good at it.

• 30:03Speaker 01

  She's so good at it.

• 30:04Drew Afualo?

  And also, I remember, we were both on her show. What was the name of her show? I'm forgetting.

• 30:09Speaker 01

  Oh, After Midnight?

• 30:10Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, After Midnight. I said After Midnight in my head, but then I started thinking about, um, that Chapel Rhone song, and then I thought, I was like.

• 30:16Speaker 01

  That can't be right. Yeah. That can't be right. You're like, My King is Karma? Is that it?

• 30:22Drew Afualo?

  Femininomina?

• 30:23Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 30:24Drew Afualo?

  I think that was the name of it.

• 30:25Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 30:25Drew Afualo?

  But, uh, how was your experience on the show?

• 30:27Speaker 01

  So fun.

• 30:27Drew Afualo?

  I thought it was a blast.

• 30:28Speaker 01

  So fun.

• 30:29Drew Afualo?

  I had fun.

• 30:30Speaker 01

  You know, I actually have a question. Okay.

• 30:31Drew Afualo?

  Oh yeah, please.

• 30:32Speaker 01

  I recently did this like audition type thing.

• 30:35Drew Afualo?

  Okay.

• 30:35Speaker 01

  And before I go on stage, he goes, "Yeah, I'm really shocked they had you back three times. The network wanted to, uh, ban you after the first time you were on."

• 30:46Drew Afualo?

  Why?

• 30:46Speaker 01

  I'm about to go on stage too. I go, "Mama?" Like, "Is it?" Some, what?

• 30:51Drew Afualo?

  What?

• 30:51Speaker 01

  And he was, yeah, he was like, "You're, I mean, you're so dirty that no one wanted to have you back."

• 30:57Drew Afualo?

  Him just telling you that, by the way?

• 30:59Speaker 01

  I know. I go, "It's been lovely chatting."

• 31:04Drew Afualo?

  Hey, thanks for the time.

• 31:05Speaker 01

  Isn't that crazy?

• 31:06Drew Afualo?

  That is an insane thing to say.

• 31:07Speaker 01

  In your professional opinion, do you think he was trying to throw me?

• 31:11Drew Afualo?

  Yes, I do.

• 31:12Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 31:12Drew Afualo?

  I think he was, yeah. I think he was trying to throw, especially if, what, what were you auditioning for? Was it something, was it based off like personalities you have to riff or anything?

• 31:20Speaker 01

  It was, it was like five minute stand-up sets.

• 31:22Drew Afualo?

  Right. Okay, then yes. I think, I absolutely think so, yes. Because it wasn't, if it wasn't scripted and what you were doing was like stand-up, I do think it was like a psychological warfare thing.

• 31:32Speaker 01

  Do you ever think, I know you don't do that to people. I don't do it either. I don't even think to do it to people.

• 31:36Drew Afualo?

  No.

• 31:37Speaker 01

  We could ruin lives if we used our powers for that.

• 31:39Drew Afualo?

  Oh yeah. I say all the time, you guys should be lucky that I'm that nice.

• 31:43Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 31:43Drew Afualo?

  Believe it or not, that's me being nice.

• 31:45Speaker 01

  Yes!

• 31:45Drew Afualo?

  Online, believe it or not, that's me being nice. That is as far as it goes and that is all I can give you. And that is after years of therapy, mind you. Like, imagine if you caught me at 19, bitch, please.

• 31:56Speaker 01

  Uh-uh.

• 31:57Drew Afualo?

  Oh, no, no, no.

• 31:58Speaker 01

  This read was sponsored by BetterHelp.

• 32:01Drew Afualo?

  For real. That's why I said like, that is not me being mean. Like, at all. That's me having fun and being silly. If I was actually gonna be mean, the shit I would, this shit I'd say would, girl.

• 32:11Speaker 01

  You'd be deported.

• 32:12Drew Afualo?

  Grippy sock kingdom.

• 32:13Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 32:14Drew Afualo?

  That's where the fuck you're going. And that's, and that's like when, I'm like, that is a gift. I'm giving you a gift.

• 32:18Speaker 01

  Totally.

• 32:19Drew Afualo?

  Like, you should be lucky I'm not clocked in, for real.

• 32:21Speaker 01

  Oh my gosh.

• 32:22Drew Afualo?

  That is an insane thing to say to you, though.

• 32:24Speaker 01

  I think so. It really, I mean, it worked. I still did great, but like, he-

• 32:28Drew Afualo?

  Oh, and he said it before?

• 32:29Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 32:30Drew Afualo?

  Okay, then yes. I, uh, even more so, I'm even more convicted.

• 32:32Speaker 01

  And he's a straight guy, so I'm like-

• 32:34Drew Afualo?

  And what a straight guy thing-

• 32:35Speaker 01

  I already think he's up to no good.

• 32:36Drew Afualo?

  Well, and what a straight guy thing to do.

• 32:38Speaker 01

  I, I know.

• 32:40Drew Afualo?

  Like, what a weird, like, 80's movie bully thing to do.

• 32:43Speaker 01

  I know! It's like, okay, Brad.

• 32:45Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, such a like-

• 32:47Speaker 01

  Hit the slopes.

• 32:47Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, I really don't know- That feels so like TV.

• 32:52Speaker 01

  Yeah, I know, no, it was very surreal and I just bring it up because it really does feel like, did that happen?

• 32:59Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 32:59Speaker 01

  Like, what a crazy thing.

• 33:01Drew Afualo?

  Well, and I know too, because when I was on the show and I was like, I guess, but so it wasn't very long and they already had like the three comedians, and I'll tell you who they were later, but they, they, actually I only remember one of them, I don't remember the other two, but,

• 33:16Drew Afualo?

  I, it was like supposed to be like a dating thing, like dadies, a dating show, like from the seventies, and basically like I was asking them questions and they had to-

• 33:24Speaker 01

  And you were gonna pick one of them or something?

• 33:25Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, and so like, what I didn't know about the skit was like they would be putting up something behind me that they would have to work into their answer.

• 33:31Speaker 01

  Got it.

• 33:32Drew Afualo?

  So then I would just have to react to the answer, so I didn't have to have anything written.

• 33:36Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 33:36Drew Afualo?

  Um, but I was like, you guys cool with improv, I'm cool with improv, because they asked me if I wanted jokes written for me and I was like, no. And also, how would that work if they're riffing, like how, because then I realized after I-

• 33:47Speaker 01

  They would know.

• 33:48Drew Afualo?

  Well, then I realized after I was a contestant that they write them ahead of time.

• 33:51Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 33:51Drew Afualo?

  Like the jokes and stuff.

• 33:52Speaker 01

  And you like pick the ones that you want, yeah.

• 33:54Drew Afualo?

  Yes, so there was a segment where they had dogs and they were saying like, is this dog good or bad and like why or whatever? And so I was like, bad, and because it was a German shepherd, and I was like, it's a cop, right? Which no one laughed, and then I go, oh, are we supporting the thin blue line here? That made everybody laugh, and I was like, oh, everybody tell everyone after midnight supports the blue lives matter movement. And that killed everyone, they cut that whole part.

• 34:19Speaker 01

  I knew it, I knew it.

• 34:21Drew Afualo?

  They cut my best joke.

• 34:22Speaker 01

  They're cowards.

• 34:23Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 34:24Speaker 01

  They're cowards.

• 34:25Drew Afualo?

  I had Bob cackling when I said that shit.

• 34:27Speaker 01

  Yes!

• 34:28Drew Afualo?

  Because I was like, of course, because it's funny, I was like, oh, you guys, what are we, thin blue line supporters here? Everybody laughed.

• 34:33Speaker 01

  It's because it's hilarious.

• 34:34Drew Afualo?

  Whatever. It's illegal for a woman to be funny.

• 34:37Speaker 01

  Uh, yeah.

• 34:38Drew Afualo?

  Beautiful and whimsical.

• 34:38Speaker 01

  In this country.

• 34:40Drew Afualo?

  This episode is presented to you by eBay. Tell me if I'm alone here, but shopping used to feel more fun. Before all the algorithm fed blah and endless sea of dupes. But I have a confession. I've found that fun feeling again on eBay. It's not mindless scrolling. It's a fashion pursuit. And when you score that rare sneaker or the bag you've been manifesting, it's a rush. eBay has millions of pre-loved finds from hundreds of brands backed by eBay Authenticity Guarantee. eBay, things people love. To pivot, I do have some fun facts about you.

• 35:20Speaker 01

  I'm, yeah, I'm scared.

• 35:22Drew Afualo?

  And I would love to read them too, and we can go through them together. Okay, so, um, oh, wait, hold on, sorry, I opened the wrong one.

• 35:29Speaker 01

  Let me do whoever's you pulled up.

• 35:31Drew Afualo?

  That was Jinx Monsoons.

• 35:32Speaker 01

  Oh, okay.

• 35:35Drew Afualo?

  I'm like, you and Jinx look alike.

• 35:36Speaker 01

  You sold out Broadway, eight shows in a row. I'm like.

• 35:40Drew Afualo?

  Okay, this one says, you recently posted on Instagram, never forget the time my manager's girlfriend tried to set me up with her friend Brian, but I already had his number stored in my phone as Brian Best BJ Ever.

• 35:51Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's so true.

• 35:52Drew Afualo?

  Is that for real?

• 35:53Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. It was so awkward, too.

• 35:57Drew Afualo?

  Sometimes when I listen to my gay friends talk, I feel like, uh, Jennifer Coolidge when she's like, these gays, they're trying to kill me. That's how you would just stress me out.

• 36:08Speaker 01

  Yeah, you know, we've really figured it out from my perspective. Because me and Brian texted after that.

• 36:15Drew Afualo?

  Oh, wow.

• 36:16Speaker 01

  But yeah, he and I had hooked up before. He gave me a great beach. And then I was hanging with my manager and his girlfriend. She's like, my friend Brian, um, really would love to like go out sometime, blah, blah, blah. And I was like, oh, yeah, give me his number and put in my number, my phone. And it's Brian, I, he's stored.

• 36:31Drew Afualo?

  Would you believe?

• 36:32Speaker 01

  Best BJ ever.

• 36:34Drew Afualo?

  Would you believe? You know what's funny is I still have contacts in my phone from like years ago, like when I was in college.

• 36:40Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 36:41Drew Afualo?

  And one time I was scrolling through my phone, uh, trying to see if I had someone's number. And I had a contact in there. I literally am gonna look it up right now because I was like, what in the fuck?

• 36:50Speaker 01

  Oh no.

• 36:51Drew Afualo?

  Even is this? Like, I think it was something.

• 36:54Speaker 01

  It's like Bailey stole my hair.

• 36:55Drew Afualo?

  No, it literally says fucking security guard DC bar and then a bunch of question marks.

• 37:03Drew Afualo?

  And this is a real, I'll like.

• 37:05Speaker 01

  Was that from like a brownout night?

• 37:06Drew Afualo?

  I really genuinely, I've only been to DC, I think, one time when I was in college.

• 37:11Speaker 01

  Starts with fucking?

• 37:12Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, it says fucking security guard DC bar.

• 37:14Speaker 01

  Is anyone else in your phone that starts with fucking?

• 37:17Drew Afualo?

  No, that's why I was like, who the fuck is that? When I saw it, I was like, yo, what the fuck? I, I, I don't know. I do kind of remember like when I went to DC in college. One of my girlfriends had lived there for a while, so she was like, let's go out, like after we finished. Cause I went for school. We went to like this work thing.

• 37:35Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 37:36Drew Afualo?

  And then that night we went out and then I remember we were having so much fun. We were in this like three story like bar. Bunch of rich, like blue, like white collar guys, so they have money and they're willing to buy drinks. So we were having a time of our lives. And then I had this like backpack purse at the time. And I was like, oh, just put all your shit in my backpack. And then I had put it under a table.

• 37:56Speaker 01

  No.

• 37:57Drew Afualo?

  So we could like dance and stuff because my backpack was just hitting everyone. It was just getting in the way.

• 38:01Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 38:01Drew Afualo?

  Went until looking under the table, gone.

• 38:03Speaker 01

  No.

• 38:04Drew Afualo?

  All of our shit was in there. So then I went and I was talking to a security guard. Who I think was attracted to me, but that's neither here nor there. I just really like saying it.

• 38:12Speaker 01

  He might've worked harder.

• 38:13Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, and I say it because I was leveraging, um, I guess like stereotypes against me at the time, like tits pushed up to my neck.

• 38:20Speaker 01

  Yeah, of course.

• 38:20Drew Afualo?

  I was like using that to try and get my stuff back. Yeah, I was like, please help me, please.

• 38:25Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 38:25Drew Afualo?

  And then, uh, he didn't. I actually, my friend ended up finding the backpack. This girl had taken it by accident and she left it somewhere else. So we ended up finding all of our things.

• 38:34Speaker 01

  And it was all in there?

• 38:34Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, but I like, the night is very spotty.

• 38:37Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 38:38Drew Afualo?

  But I do remember asking a security guard for help. I think it's his number because I think I pushed it a little too hard. And I think he thought I was like, wanted to hang. And I was like, okay. And I didn't remember his name, so I just wrote that in there.

• 38:49Speaker 01

  You actually give yourself a lot of information.

• 38:53Drew Afualo?

  I laid the clues out.

• 38:54Speaker 01

  Girl, you're gonna need this info.

• 38:56Drew Afualo?

  So I could find it again. I could find my, I do remember though, something distinctly I remember about that night, I left the bar and across the street, there was this pizza place. And they would stay, they would open at like nine PM and close at like four AM. So they would do like two dollar slices and they would just be selling so many of them and they're huge. And me and my friend went to go get them. And we were eating drunk, having a great time, found my backpack, we're living high. And then these guys, there was this group of terrible men near us, obviously like a drug.

• 39:24Speaker 01

  When's there not?

• 39:24Drew Afualo?

  Like a drug dog, I could smell them. And so they were literally like commiserating, nothing good ever when they look like they're plotting. And there was also a group of dolls and the dolls were walking and they were fab. But the dolls were walking, minding their own business. And then they started being super transphobic to them and saying awful things. My friend, in the middle of me talking to her, because I didn't see this happening. I was like talking, in the middle of me talking, she stands up and then throws her pizza hard as fuck at like the back of the main dude doing it.

• 39:56Speaker 01

  Hell, yes.

• 39:56Drew Afualo?

  And it hit him hard as fuck and she said, fuck you. And that guy got so mad, they stopped harassing those girls. The girls left.

• 40:05Speaker 01

  And they killed your friend.

• 40:05Drew Afualo?

  And then she was like, now look at my fucking pizza. Now I don't even get to eat my pizza and we laughed, we laughed so hard and they didn't do anything about it. Because they're a bitch. Yeah.

• 40:14Speaker 01

  I bet it stuck to his bald ass spot on the back.

• 40:17Drew Afualo?

  There was like pizza sauce on his, on his shoulder and I was laughing. And I was sitting there and I was laughing. And then I shared my pizza with her, it was a beautiful night.

• 40:25Speaker 01

  Oh my gosh.

• 40:26Drew Afualo?

  That's all I really remember.

• 40:27Speaker 01

  We can't afford another two dollar slice.

• 40:29Drew Afualo?

  No, and we couldn't.

• 40:30Speaker 01

  We ended the patriarchy tonight.

• 40:32Drew Afualo?

  I was like, I was like, you know what? Ally. You earned this, Ally. Give her some of my pizza.

• 40:39Drew Afualo?

  Okay, next fun fact, it says in.

• 40:41Speaker 01

  I love that the first fact was just a post I posted on Instagram.

• 40:45Drew Afualo?

  Well, maybe, are you living, are you living under the, off the grid?

• 40:49Speaker 01

  Maybe, every day I move closer to wanting to, like setting my birth certificate on fire.

• 40:54Drew Afualo?

  Oh, you and me, you and me both, honestly. Okay, it says in 2018, you bought a Toyota Prius named Nana?

• 41:01Speaker 01

  Oh yeah, named Nana, my Nana.

• 41:02Drew Afualo?

  Nana.

• 41:03Speaker 01

  She, so I'd been saving up, I rode a motorcycle for nine years.

• 41:06Drew Afualo?

  No way.

• 41:07Speaker 01

  I, that shock is homophobia.

• 41:11Drew Afualo?

  Is it?

• 41:12Speaker 01

  No, no, what, what, what happened is you feared for my life and you feared for the lives around me.

• 41:16Drew Afualo?

  Well, it's not because you're gay, it's because you're a twink.

• 41:18Speaker 01

  Thank you. Thank you. America's oldest living twink, as Bob, as Bob calls me. Bob introduced me as America's oldest living twink, Zach Noe Towers, or, um, David Spade impersonator Zach Noe Towers.

• 41:32Speaker 01

  And he got my ass.

• 41:35Speaker 01

  But I had motorcycle for nine years. I've been saving up to get a car and then-

• 41:39Drew Afualo?

  What kind of motorcycle did you have?

• 41:40Speaker 01

  A Honda Rebel. It's a 250cc. It's a baby bike. And to be clear, I got it because I was in love with my roommate. He also had a motorcycle. He casually said, you should get one. I'll teach you how to ride it. I heard, and then we'll drive off into the sunset.

• 41:56Drew Afualo?

  Right.

• 41:57Speaker 01

  That part didn't happen, but-

• 41:58Drew Afualo?

  You're with a scarf tied around my neck.

• 42:01Speaker 01

  Yes, exactly.

• 42:01Drew Afualo?

  Oh, my god.

• 42:02Speaker 01

  In my little sidecar. Um, but he taught me how to ride and I, it was great. Way to get around LA because the weather's always nice and-

• 42:08Drew Afualo?

  That's true.

• 42:09Speaker 01

  You zip between cars and stuff.

• 42:10Drew Afualo?

  Traffic and everything.

• 42:11Speaker 01

  I've been saving up to get a car and then my Nana passed and she left us, I think $5,000, which back then was like-

• 42:20Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 42:20Speaker 01

  I wish she had died sooner. I'm kidding. Just kidding. She's one of my favorite people that's ever existed. Nana, if you're listening, I love you. But I was able to get like a nicer car because of the $5,000.

• 42:32Drew Afualo?

  And you know what? I also had a Prius.

• 42:35Speaker 01

  I have a Prius still. I upgraded to a Prius Prime.

• 42:37Drew Afualo?

  Ooh, I loved my Prius.

• 42:40Speaker 01

  Do you have like a really nice car?

• 42:42Drew Afualo?

  No, I have a, and I don't want to fucking hear it because I got it a long time ago. I have a Tesla.

• 42:47Speaker 01

  Oh, okay, that's okay. No, no, no, that's fine.

• 42:48Drew Afualo?

  But I'm just like, I just don't want to fucking hear it.

• 42:50Speaker 01

  A Cybertruck?

• 42:51Drew Afualo?

  No. Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. And it's chrome and it says, "I love America" on the outside of it.

• 42:59Speaker 01

  A thin blue line.

• 43:00Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, it has a thin blue line on the, no, that's the sticker on the back, obviously.

• 43:04Speaker 01

  I shoot first and ask questions later.

• 43:06Drew Afualo?

  Don't tread on me.

• 43:07Speaker 01

  The way I want to instinctively drag a shovel across every Cybertruck I see.

• 43:12Drew Afualo?

  And they're ugly.

• 43:13Speaker 01

  They're-

• 43:13Drew Afualo?

  As fuck.

• 43:14Speaker 01

  Ugly and imposing.

• 43:16Drew Afualo?

  No.

• 43:16Speaker 01

  And-

• 43:17Drew Afualo?

  They're an eyesore.

• 43:18Speaker 01

  It's the quickest litmus test for a walking asshole.

• 43:21Drew Afualo?

  I know, I agree. And they're fucking, they're just dumb. They're dumb as hell. They look dumb as hell and the people driving them are dumb as hell.

• 43:27Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 43:27Drew Afualo?

  There you go.

• 43:28Speaker 01

  We got them.

• 43:28Drew Afualo?

  Yeah. But I loved my Prius. I had my Prius for so long. We actually still have the Prius. I think I gave it to my brother. Now, yeah, my brother now has my Prius.

• 43:37Speaker 01

  Oh, to be clear, mine's like a plug-in hybrid, so the first 25 miles are pure electric.

• 43:41Drew Afualo?

  Tea.

• 43:42Speaker 01

  I get 85 miles to the gallon.

• 43:44Drew Afualo?

  And that's on fucking period.

• 43:45Speaker 01

  Isn't that on period?

• 43:47Drew Afualo?

  That's exactly why.

• 43:48Speaker 01

  I sound like a cop when I say stuff like that. I just started saying things slap. It's too late.

• 43:55Drew Afualo?

  It's too late.

• 43:56Speaker 01

  It's too late, wig.

• 43:58Drew Afualo?

  Oh, my god, wig.

• 43:59Speaker 01

  Wig.

• 43:59Drew Afualo?

  Oh, my god, wig.

• 44:02Drew Afualo?

  The best part of that clip is her not being able to explain.

• 44:04Speaker 01

  Yeah, exactly.

• 44:05Drew Afualo?

  What it means.

• 44:06Speaker 01

  Word, Katie.

• 44:07Drew Afualo?

  Using it improperly and don't know the definition.

• 44:10Speaker 01

  Sounds like a white trash.

• 44:13Drew Afualo?

  For real. Okay, this next one says the SAG Actors Fund gave you a $40 check in the mail for a new pair of shoes.

• 44:21Speaker 01

  Now, who's talking to the IRS here? That's great. Okay, this is actually, this is tea. That, I've been SAG for a long time and they have this shoe fund where you, they reimburse you up to like $40 or $50 for a pair of shoes every year.

• 44:38Drew Afualo?

  Tea.

• 44:39Speaker 01

  It's like this old actor, did you know? You're missing out on some free shoes. So, yeah, once a year, I usually go to Crossroads and I get my like $40 pair of shoes and I send him my receipt and I get my $40. I haven't done it in a long time, but like, it's cool.

• 44:55Drew Afualo?

  That's so fun.

• 44:56Speaker 01

  It's such a weird thing, too. If you're SAG, like a union actor, and can't afford shoes.

• 45:00Drew Afualo?

  No.

• 45:01Speaker 01

  It's a great thing.

• 45:02Drew Afualo?

  Actually, it's actually crazy.

• 45:03Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 45:04Drew Afualo?

  I actually, believe it or not, am not SAG.

• 45:06Speaker 01

  Really?

• 45:07Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, I've done lots of, like, commercials, but I don't, I don't really.

• 45:10Speaker 01

  Yeah, like, I've done a lot of illegal work.

• 45:12Drew Afualo?

  I've just like, I'm really unclear, honestly, on like the parameters, because I've done commercials but for social, so I don't know. But I was in a commercial that was on TV once, too, so it's like, I really am unclear.

• 45:24Speaker 01

  They have a warrant out for your arrest at SAG-Astra.

• 45:27Drew Afualo?

  No, for real, they're gonna arrest me.

• 45:28Speaker 01

  What's gonna happen is you're gonna be Taft Heartlead, which is just, you're gonna book some, an acting role in like, I don't know, Lucifer, season six. I don't know where that came from in my head. See, that's why, is it like, am I getting old or is it dementia?

• 45:43Drew Afualo?

  Porque no los dos, honestly.

• 45:45Speaker 01

  Porque no los dos, exacta mundo. Um, but there's gonna be like, it's gonna be paperwork. And it costs a shit ton to join the union now, but it does have a lot of great perks.

• 45:56Drew Afualo?

  I know, I've heard it's fucking awesome. That's why I'm like, I honestly don't know. Every time they ask me and every time I check, it says, "No."

• 46:03Speaker 01

  No!

• 46:03Drew Afualo?

  You know, when you feel like you can Google it and they're like, yeah, it's like, eh, yeah.

• 46:07Speaker 01

  Um, I love though that you are pursuing acting.

• 46:11Drew Afualo?

  Yes.

• 46:12Speaker 01

  And I-

• 46:12Drew Afualo?

  Do you have any tips for me?

• 46:13Speaker 01

  Um, no, I don't book either. I-

• 46:18Drew Afualo?

  Two dumb bitches saying exactly back and forth. I know that's fucking right.

• 46:21Speaker 01

  It's so funny, and you know what's gonna happen to you maybe eventually, and I hope it doesn't actually. Someone will contact you and be like, "We wrote this part for you."

• 46:28Drew Afualo?

  I hope.

• 46:29Speaker 01

  And then you won't get it.

• 46:32Drew Afualo?

  Honestly, I believe you.

• 46:33Speaker 01

  We actually found someone that does you better.

• 46:35Drew Afualo?

  Well, yeah, well, and I've said this before, I think, but like, I got a read for a very, very, very small role on Euphoria.

• 46:44Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 46:44Drew Afualo?

  No, no, believe it or not, Moana 2, I have sneaking suspicions that they, they wanted me to read just to see.

• 46:51Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 46:51Drew Afualo?

  Also because I'm Samoan, I mean, I'm sure, but like, singing was a huge part of the role, even though I said I couldn't sing and they still wanted me to try.

• 47:03Speaker 00

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• 47:36Drew Afualo?

  Didn't hear back.

• 47:37Speaker 01

  Of course.

• 47:37Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 47:38Speaker 01

  Don't waste my time.

• 47:39Drew Afualo?

  And honestly, they probably blocked me after I sent my a cappella tape in.

• 47:43Speaker 01

  They play it every day?

• 47:44Drew Afualo?

  Right.

• 47:45Speaker 01

  For a little boost?

• 47:45Drew Afualo?

  No, I honestly never watched it. After it was recorded, I never watched it again because I'm humiliated by it.

• 47:50Speaker 01

  Oh, I was gonna say, that is my tip, though. Audition and literally, forget about it.

• 47:54Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 47:55Speaker 01

  Just do the tape, or do the audition, forget about it.

• 47:58Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 47:58Speaker 01

  Anyway, go on.

• 47:59Drew Afualo?

  No, that's, and that's, and that's great advice for me. Like, even my, I have an acting coach that I work with, and he's told me that too. Like, he was like, each role is just like, if it's meant to be, it'll come back to me. If not, I did my best.

• 48:11Speaker 01

  Your job is just to do the tape, have fun, and like, do your best.

• 48:15Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, exactly. I have to keep reminding myself about that, too, because I feel a rage that is borderline Republican when I'm not good at things immediately.

• 48:24Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 48:24Drew Afualo?

  So it's something I do fight, like a werewolf. You know what I mean?

• 48:28Speaker 01

  We need to get you a gun.

• 48:29Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, just in case.

• 48:31Speaker 01

  So you can just take it out?

• 48:31Drew Afualo?

  Not loaded. Not loaded.

• 48:34Speaker 01

  Maybe one. It can be fun. I went to a gun range. A gay guy took me, I say it like I'm not one. A gay friend took me to a gun range, and we shot stuff.

• 48:43Drew Afualo?

  And how was it?

• 48:44Speaker 01

  I, I'm a good shot.

• 48:46Drew Afualo?

  Are you?

• 48:46Speaker 01

  Yeah, I got like, all heart area. And then I did one, where it was like, the picture?

• 48:52Drew Afualo?

  Mm-hmm.

• 48:52Speaker 01

  Was like, a criminal, holding a woman hostage.

• 48:54Drew Afualo?

  Oh, yes.

• 48:55Speaker 01

  I got her ass. I said, get away from my man, yeah. Got her in the cooch, got her in the hair.

• 49:00Drew Afualo?

  You're creating a backstory for it.

• 49:02Speaker 01

  He was safe. He was marked safe.

• 49:05Drew Afualo?

  On Facebook? The only, the only-

• 49:07Speaker 01

  No one's safe on Facebook.

• 49:08Drew Afualo?

  I've never been to a gun range. I, I honestly really don't have any desire to go, but like, I, I went to this one, like, simulation thing, because my brother-in-law was in the military. Um, he no longer is, but he was. And we went to this, like, simulation thing they use to, like, train-

• 49:23Speaker 01

  Oh, god.

• 49:24Drew Afualo?

  Cops, or like-

• 49:24Speaker 01

  And people are like, jumping out?

• 49:25Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, like, and it's like a 360 thing, so like, you, you're holding a prop gun.

• 49:30Speaker 01

  On your six!

• 49:31Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, and so like, you like, go, you'll select the situations, so it's like, oh, it's a domestic violence call.

• 49:37Speaker 01

  Oh, it's a movie theater?

• 49:37Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, and it plays it like it's POV, like it's first person. So you're like, walking in, and then you have to assess and decide what you're gonna do, whatever. Um, it was honestly scary and awful. But there was one part where you had to just shoot targets and it just wanted to see how fast you could shoot five of them. And just, you're, we were just going for time. And like my, my man is very, very competitive. Uh, my brother-in-law is like obscenely competitive, so it's like.

• 50:04Speaker 01

  Do they get angry?

• 50:05Drew Afualo?

  Speaking of two dumb bitches saying exactly back and forth, like the two of them competing. But like, but it's also like, there's an age gap too. So like my, my man's the oldest, so it's one of those where they just like silently compete until it becomes too much and everybody has to go home.

• 50:18Speaker 01

  And like, this isn't fun anymore.

• 50:19Drew Afualo?

  Yeah. So when I was doing it, all I was trying to beat was him because I know he hates being beat. And also he's in the military. He got, he's trained to shoot. Like literally trained to shoot. One time my brother-in-law locked my guest room door on accident, like from the inside. And all his shit was in there and all the windows were locked. So I had to hire a locksmith to come and open it. Like 300 bucks, mind you, it was fucking crazy. But I was like, can you pick the lock? And he goes, no. And I go, they taught you how to shoot someone from a hundred yards away and they didn't teach you how to pick a fucking lock in the military.

• 50:53Speaker 01

  Cr- shoot the lock.

• 50:54Drew Afualo?

  How useless. What a useless fucking skill set.

• 50:57Speaker 01

  My tax dollars? My tax dollars?

• 50:59Drew Afualo?

  Start training them to pick locks. It's a far more fucking.

• 51:02Speaker 01

  Useful. Or braid hair. Something.

• 51:05Drew Afualo?

  Something. God. Okay, let's get back to your fun facts. Hold on. Okay, this one says, in 2016, you lived next door to an elderly woman named Lulu?

• 51:16Speaker 01

  She's still there. She's the bane of my existence. We used to be friends and.

• 51:21Drew Afualo?

  Now you're enemies?

• 51:22Speaker 01

  Lulu thinks we live in New York City. Cause this bitch rises with the sun and she's slamming containers. She's slamming trash cans. She's slamming.

• 51:31Drew Afualo?

  What is she doing in there?

• 51:31Speaker 01

  Look at, this is where, I respect the hustle. She's looking for like cans and, and things to like recycle. She's like a big recycler. I think you can get money for it. But she's obviously well into retirement. And she just, she walks up and down like we have two driveways next to each other and just slams lids. And I'm like, girl.

• 51:51Drew Afualo?

  It's like stomp over there.

• 51:52Speaker 01

  I'll give you twenty dollars if you stop.

• 51:54Drew Afualo?

  She like banging cymbals out there?

• 51:55Speaker 01

  Yeah, basically. I'm like, this is not our culture.

• 51:59Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 51:59Speaker 01

  We sleep. We sleep in. We don't slam.

• 52:03Drew Afualo?

  Girl, she's my biggest op right now.

• 52:05Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 52:06Drew Afualo?

  She's my enemy right now.

• 52:07Speaker 01

  And she's so nice. Actually, Lulu, if you're listening, and I know you're not because you don't know what podcasts are.

• 52:11Drew Afualo?

  Lulu, I know you're a huge fan of the comment section.

• 52:13Speaker 01

  So she always like asks me some questions when I'm leaving. Sometimes a hookup will be leaving and she'll interview him. Hi.

• 52:21Drew Afualo?

  And how was your stay?

• 52:22Speaker 01

  How are you? Who are you here to see? I'm like, leave him alone. I mean, well, I don't know his name. I'm like, oh, it's Brian.

• 52:29Drew Afualo?

  Her taking role at the door. And can we expect you again tomorrow?

• 52:35Speaker 01

  Could you just fill out this quick survey?

• 52:36Drew Afualo?

  Yeah. Could you sign the guestbook on your way out?

• 52:39Speaker 01

  Yeah. But I'm like, Lulu, leave him alone.

• 52:42Drew Afualo?

  Lulu, oh.

• 52:46Drew Afualo?

  When I was in college, my friend and I lived in a duplex. So like, our ba- our house was connected.

• 52:52Speaker 01

  Which is the dream.

• 52:53Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, like.

• 52:53Speaker 01

  Living next door to a friend.

• 52:54Drew Afualo?

  Well, no, we both lived in the duplex, like in the house together, but our landlord lived in the front house.

• 53:00Speaker 01

  Nightmare.

• 53:00Drew Afualo?

  And she had, she was, I think, two thousand years old.

• 53:05Speaker 01

  You've been dead for eighty years.

• 53:06Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, give or take two thousand. And she had like six little dogs and they would yap all the time. And she had like an adult daughter who was like in her forties, living in the house. And like, I had a moped in college, so I would pack, I would park it behind my house and like lock it up back there. And then I would start it back there and then I would just wheel it up and then drive off on the driveway. Yeah, but it's not loud like a motorcycle. So it just sounds like, like a little, like a car, almost. And so she yelled at me once because she was like, you start that moped and it's so loud and blah, blah, blah. I'm like, no, it's not. And she was like, well, you're waking up my daughter. And I was like, your daughter is forty and it's nine thirty AM. That bitch should be awake.

• 53:47Speaker 01

  Hey, the fellow adults.

• 53:49Drew Afualo?

  Yeah. Hey, clock in, hoe. Don't you have a job to get to?

• 53:52Speaker 01

  My moped sounds like one and a half of your dogs.

• 53:54Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, certainly like your dogs. Yeah, whatever. But she like, so we were kind of ops for a while. In the beginning, she was really, but she had this crazy vendetta against the woman who lived behind us.

• 54:06Speaker 01

  Great.

• 54:07Drew Afualo?

  So like I, like there was like a fence and I could see that woman gardening. And like one time, my roommate, who's like still one of my really good friends to this day, she was like, um, I guess they were kinda keying about the lady behind the house. And she was like, oh, I can't stand that lady. And then after my friend bonded with her on some hater shit, then she like loved us.

• 54:24Speaker 01

  Of course.

• 54:25Drew Afualo?

  And so then when I had this, I was dating this guy that was awful in college once and he, um, but I didn't know he was awful yet. And he just showed up to my house, um, drunk one time, but I wasn't there and neither was my roommate. So he was like knocking on the door and my window was right by the door. So he was like Drew, Drew, like yelling my name. And her name was Hoa, shouts out to Hoa. She went outside and she was like, who are you? Who are you? What are you doing here? Cause it was like nine PM.

• 54:50Speaker 01

  She was a shot off soccer.

• 54:51Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, yeah. Like she had something in her hand. And then she was like, yeah. And he was like, I, I'm, I'm friends with Drew. Like Drew lives here. And she goes, nobody lives here by that name.

• 54:59Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 55:00Drew Afualo?

  And then the next time I saw her, she goes, don't worry. I told him to get out of here. And I was like, okay. I was like, hey, shouts out to my girl, period. Cause I didn't know I hated him yet, but I was like, it's okay. You don't need to do that. And she was like, well, I don't know. And I was like, you know what? You're right.

• 55:14Speaker 01

  She's, I'm gonna lead with this foot, this angry ass foot.

• 55:17Drew Afualo?

  So just in case, I don't know who that is. I was like, she's a real bitch. Honestly, she was looking out for me.

• 55:22Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 55:23Drew Afualo?

  So we had a real enemies to lovers arc.

• 55:25Speaker 01

  That's beautiful.

• 55:26Drew Afualo?

  That's beautiful.

• 55:26Speaker 01

  And it's like anything, like the love turns into hate, the hate turns into love. It's like just powerful emotion. Yeah.

• 55:32Drew Afualo?

  Yeah. And that's you and Lulu. You're playing a love hate situation.

• 55:35Speaker 01

  I'm gonna fall in love with her at some point.

• 55:37Drew Afualo?

  Lavender marriage?

• 55:38Speaker 01

  Probably not, but maybe.

• 55:40Drew Afualo?

  Okay. Last fun fact. Okay. It says, as a child, you could do the splits. And then the follow up question is, can you still?

• 55:47Speaker 01

  No, I can't.

• 55:48Drew Afualo?

  Damn.

• 55:49Speaker 01

  I do want to be flexible. If anyone.

• 55:52Drew Afualo?

  Any particular reason?

• 55:54Speaker 01

  I mean.

• 55:54Drew Afualo?

  Just cause?

• 55:55Speaker 01

  Cause I'm, I'm entering the last stage of my life. I don't wanna like, I don't wanna-

• 56:01Drew Afualo?

  You're acting like you're ninety years old.

• 56:03Speaker 01

  I know, but in L.A. like forty is kind of like, it's crazy.

• 56:07Drew Afualo?

  It's only if you look forty.

• 56:08Speaker 01

  That's fair.

• 56:09Drew Afualo?

  And you don't.

• 56:10Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 56:10Drew Afualo?

  There you go.

• 56:11Speaker 01

  I feel like you have to say that, just like I made you late. Okay, okay, okay, okay.

• 56:15Drew Afualo?

  You're crazy.

• 56:15Speaker 01

  Sorry, I just got insecure.

• 56:18Speaker 01

  You saw it happen.

• 56:20Drew Afualo?

  We watched it happen live.

• 56:22Speaker 01

  Dipped in. Do a playback, and I go, uh.

• 56:28Drew Afualo?

  Sorry, I just got insecure.

• 56:29Speaker 01

  I just like, I know that like, flexibility is like-

• 56:33Drew Afualo?

  Good for you.

• 56:34Speaker 01

  Huge part of like aging gracefully.

• 56:36Drew Afualo?

  It's very true. That and also building muscle. Are you a very, do you like to build muscle? You look pretty flexible to me.

• 56:42Speaker 01

  I'm not bad.

• 56:43Drew Afualo?

  And you're in jeans.

• 56:44Speaker 01

  You're right.

• 56:45Drew Afualo?

  That's a lot harder than jeans.

• 56:46Speaker 01

  Which is hard for me to wear as a, like an older millennial. I wanna wear tight pants.

• 56:50Drew Afualo?

  You wanna wear skin tight jeans?

• 56:52Speaker 01

  These kids these days, they look like extras on Clueless. Just grungy, grungy, grungy.

• 57:00Drew Afualo?

  Girl, you need tailor fitted pants. You need some tight pants.

• 57:04Speaker 01

  But I do work out like almost every day. I love doing a stair machine.

• 57:08Drew Afualo?

  Oh, do you, oh, do you have a preference of workout? Like, do you like a class? Do you like the gym?

• 57:12Speaker 01

  You know, I think I would be a class girly if I gave myself a chance, but I do like to like not be talked to.

• 57:19Drew Afualo?

  Me too.

• 57:20Speaker 01

  There is nothing worse than a correction during a class. I'm like, I'm gonna kill myself. Everyone's looking at how I can't arch my back right now.

• 57:28Drew Afualo?

  And now, that's all they're all thinking about.

• 57:30Speaker 01

  Yes, exactly.

• 57:31Drew Afualo?

  They're all thinking about it.

• 57:32Speaker 01

  Like this stiff bitch in the back row.

• 57:33Drew Afualo?

  You're like, oh my god, remember earlier when they corrected Zach's form? They're all talking about you.

• 57:38Speaker 01

  That's literally, you know, that's true. I wish it weren't, but it's true.

• 57:42Drew Afualo?

  Have you ever tried CrossFit?

• 57:44Speaker 01

  No.

• 57:44Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, it's terrible.

• 57:45Speaker 01

  Do I look like I could sustain a CrossFit class?

• 57:48Drew Afualo?

  Honestly, and this is me being so serious, as someone who has done CrossFit, yes.

• 57:52Speaker 01

  Really?

• 57:52Drew Afualo?

  Yes.

• 57:53Speaker 01

  I feel like I would try to flip my little like, little tight tire and like wrench everything in my body.

• 57:59Drew Afualo?

  You rip it, your arms are still on there.

• 58:01Speaker 01

  Yes, so it was very SpongeBob.

• 58:02Drew Afualo?

  Like Mr. Potato Head.

• 58:06Speaker 01

  No, I do like, there's something beautiful about a class, cause, do you, wait, what are you? Are you a cla- do you do classes?

• 58:11Drew Afualo?

  I like the gym. I like going to the gym by myself.

• 58:13Speaker 01

  And you lift?

• 58:14Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 58:15Speaker 01

  Yeah, like-

• 58:16Drew Afualo?

  I do a lot of weightlifting, yeah.

• 58:17Speaker 01

  My problem is like, I can go to the gym and time passes, but no one knows if I worked out.

• 58:23Drew Afualo?

  God only knows what I'm doing in there.

• 58:25Speaker 01

  Yeah, God, check the footage. I enter and I leave, but I don't know-

• 58:29Drew Afualo?

  Just like blackout when I'm-

• 58:30Speaker 01

  I don't know what happened in the middle. Um, but with a class, you're like, obviously like, I have to impress Brad. Um, so I'm like, about to throw up, cause I'm trying to like, keep up and like-

• 58:39Drew Afualo?

  I see.

• 58:40Speaker 01

  Probably making positive change to my body.

• 58:43Drew Afualo?

  Unfortunately.

• 58:44Speaker 01

  Unfortunately.

• 58:45Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, I feel like I was, I did try, I've tried many different classes, though. Like, I've tried class workouts. I think they're great.

• 58:51Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 58:51Drew Afualo?

  I just like, personally, I'd prefer to move at my own pace.

• 58:54Speaker 01

  Thank you, and headphones.

• 58:55Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, and headphones. I get to listen to music and stuff, or like, other things. Sometimes I listen to like, YouTube videos, like, while I'm working out and stuff.

• 59:02Speaker 01

  Like, and learn?

• 59:03Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, or like, if they're podcasts or stuff, sometimes I'll listen to my own interviews. And I say that in earnest, sometimes I listen to my own interviews, and it's literally, I compare it to like, watching tape, like, athletes do.

• 59:14Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 59:15Drew Afualo?

  Where I'm like, I'm listening to myself, and I'm like, ah, I could maybe, I could wrap that joke up a little sooner.

• 59:20Speaker 01

  Uh, comedians do that.

• 59:21Drew Afualo?

  Me giving myself notes.

• 59:23Speaker 01

  Yeah, no, I mean, honestly, I can't stand the sound of my voice. Like, when I hear it, I'm like, shut up! But, it's so helpful to do what you do.

• 59:34Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, I think so. And I was like-

• 59:36Speaker 01

  Do you do it with your live shows?

• 59:38Drew Afualo?

  No, I have, well, actually, we've only recorded a few live shows, and so I have, I have listened like, to parts of it, but I don't listen to the live show all the way through.

• 59:45Speaker 01

  It can help with live stuff.

• 59:47Drew Afualo?

  That's actually a really good thing, a really good note. I never even thought of it that way.

• 59:50Speaker 01

  Also, are you flexible, and you prove it?

• 59:54Drew Afualo?

  Honestly, really no. I've never been able to do the splits. I don't think, I just don't think I've tried hard enough. I don't, I don't think I've put- I've also like, really attributed me being big and tall as like, the reason I couldn't do those things. Then when I started seeing tall people do it, I was like, well now you're fucking up my excuse.

• 1:00:09Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:00:10Drew Afualo?

  Now I have to get in there, and I, well then I saw Meg Thee Stallion do it, and I was like, well, what the fuck? Now I gotta like, I can't stand behind that anymore.

• 1:00:16Speaker 01

  No.

• 1:00:17Drew Afualo?

  Clearly, the height's not affecting it, I was just lying.

• 1:00:19Speaker 01

  That's so rude of them.

• 1:00:20Drew Afualo?

  I was so rude of Meg Thee Stallion to do that to me.

• 1:00:22Speaker 01

  The fellow talls.

• 1:00:23Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, the fellow Stallions. It's really upsetting. That's such a bummer.

• 1:00:27Speaker 01

  I'm much more of a pony myself.

• 1:00:30Drew Afualo?

  You're a pony, I'm a stallion.

• 1:00:34Drew Afualo?

  Okay, so to wrap us, I would love to know if you have any advice for any aspiring artists, whether it's comedians, like stand-up, or actors.

• 1:00:43Speaker 01

  Um, the advice that I try to take myself is kind of what I touched on earlier, like, my job is just to create.

• 1:00:51Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:51Speaker 01

  And like, kind of follow my heart, make things that make me laugh.

• 1:00:55Drew Afualo?

  Totally.

• 1:00:55Speaker 01

  And stay out of the results.

• 1:00:58Drew Afualo?

  Right.

• 1:00:58Speaker 01

  Like, you, it's like that classic, you work so hard on a video or whatever, you put it out, crickets, you, you know, fart into the microphone, eight million views.

• 1:01:06Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, totally.

• 1:01:07Speaker 01

  And it's just like, so let go.

• 1:01:09Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:09Speaker 01

  Let go of the result.

• 1:01:10Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 1:01:11Speaker 01

  Just enjoy what you're doing, like...

• 1:01:14Drew Afualo?

  Cause that is the point of art.

• 1:01:15Speaker 01

  Is the point.

• 1:01:16Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, the point is, being able to monetize it is great, but the point is to create.

• 1:01:21Speaker 01

  Uh, that's what I think at least, too.

• 1:01:22Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, totally. I think that's beautiful.

• 1:01:24Speaker 01

  Yeah, just, and do it. Like, a lot of people sit on something for a long time, trying to make it perfect, or like, so scared. Do it. You gotta just do it. You gotta let it fly. You gotta be messy.

• 1:01:33Drew Afualo?

  Very true.

• 1:01:34Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:01:34Drew Afualo?

  And like you said, like, sometimes the, the learning is in the doing, like, sometimes you need to fail and like, see it fail in order for it to...

• 1:01:41Speaker 01

  It's necessary.

• 1:01:42Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, absolutely.

• 1:01:42Speaker 01

  No one is, what's the thing, 0 for 10? Is it 10 for 10? What's the sports thing when you get it all? Okay.

• 1:01:53Speaker 01

  But it, no one is like, all hits. No one's graph is like, beep beep beep beep beep beep.

• 1:01:58Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, like, all wins, yeah.

• 1:01:59Speaker 01

  It's this.

• 1:02:00Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, absolutely.

• 1:02:00Speaker 01

  It's just, you're looking for an upward trajectory.

• 1:02:02Drew Afualo?

  Especially as an artist.

• 1:02:03Speaker 01

  Yes.

• 1:02:04Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, it's like, the name of the game, unfortunately.

• 1:02:06Speaker 01

  Yeah, and most of us are ahead of the curve.

• 1:02:08Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:08Speaker 01

  So you're gonna feel, you're gonna feel vulnerable, you're gonna feel like, exposed, you're gonna feel silly.

• 1:02:13Drew Afualo?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:14Speaker 01

  Who cares?

• 1:02:15Drew Afualo?

  And you know what? Clown for higher. That's what I am.

• 1:02:18Speaker 01

  Honk honk.

• 1:02:18Drew Afualo?

  Yeah. Really?

• 1:02:20Speaker 01

  Bitch, I got a tiny car, pass my ass in it. I'll bring the peanuts.

• 1:02:25Drew Afualo?

  Period.

• 1:02:26Speaker 01

  You bring the elephant.

• 1:02:27Drew Afualo?

  Okay, careful with that elephant.

• 1:02:28Speaker 01

  Oh!

• 1:02:32Speaker 01

  Now I wanna watch The Greatest Showman.

• 1:02:33Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, oh my god, I loved that movie when it first came out.

• 1:02:36Speaker 01

  I wanna say this with not an ounce of like sarcasm, top five favorite movies. Top five. It came out during the holidays. I lied to my family on Christmas Eve about having to do work when to see it.

• 1:02:51Drew Afualo?

  Guess where I was parked in the theater?

• 1:02:53Speaker 01

  Yeah. This brings me joy.

• 1:02:55Drew Afualo?

  The duet between Zac Efron and Hugh Jackman, yeah.

• 1:02:58Speaker 01

  I was gonna say and Zendaya.

• 1:03:00Drew Afualo?

  Oh, that was great.

• 1:03:01Speaker 01

  Gimme Zendaya swinging from a rope around the building. Love it.

• 1:03:05Drew Afualo?

  Speaking of a stallion with a little pony, that was her and Zac Efron.

• 1:03:08Speaker 01

  Oh, yes. Oh, yes. Zac Efron, birthday twin.

• 1:03:13Drew Afualo?

  Birthday twin with you?

• 1:03:15Speaker 01

  October 18.

• 1:03:16Drew Afualo?

  All I know is Zendaya's a Virgo, so and I'm also a Virgo.

• 1:03:19Speaker 01

  Stop.

• 1:03:19Drew Afualo?

  So look at us.

• 1:03:20Speaker 01

  Me and your man are Libras.

• 1:03:21Drew Afualo?

  Now you and I have to do The Greatest Showman.

• 1:03:24Speaker 01

  Oh, yes.

• 1:03:25Drew Afualo?

  But you be Zendaya and I'll be Zac Efron.

• 1:03:29Speaker 01

  You thought you were gonna send me through a twist on that one? I was like, I was waiting, I was like, I hope this bitch doesn't think she's Zendaya.

• 1:03:36Drew Afualo?

  You beat me to it. There you go. Thank you so much for coming on the show.

• 1:03:40Speaker 01

  Thank you for having me.

• 1:03:41Drew Afualo?

  I fucking love you.

• 1:03:42Speaker 01

  I love you too.

• 1:03:43Drew Afualo?

  You're the best and so funny.

• 1:03:44Speaker 01

  It has been a joy.

• 1:03:44Drew Afualo?

  It has been a joy and a pleasure, and where can everybody find you?

• 1:03:48Speaker 01

  Oh my gosh, I'm at Zach Noe Towers everywhere. I'm also gonna be in London doing a show August 1st at Leicester Square.

• 1:03:56Drew Afualo?

  Ooh, how exciting.

• 1:03:57Speaker 01

  And my first special is coming out on YouTube. Bob the Drag Queen produced it. April 24th, it's called Twink Death.

• 1:04:04Drew Afualo?

  Oh my god, I'm so excited for you. Congratulations.

• 1:04:08Speaker 01

  You should come to like the, I'll invite you to the little party we're having.

• 1:04:11Drew Afualo?

  Yeah, please.

• 1:04:12Speaker 01

  But, you know, and anyone in the room.

• 1:04:14Drew Afualo?

  Yes. Well, no, you guys can't come, just me.

• 1:04:16Speaker 01

  Well. Also, I just got PR for the first time, and I thought this was them, and they go, oh no, we didn't do that. I went, bitch, you better step it up then, cuz I got Drew on my own.

• 1:04:27Drew Afualo?

  Oh, you thought this, oh, I see. No, mama, that was me.

• 1:04:30Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 1:04:31Drew Afualo?

  That was me. There you go. And I'll ask, I'll invoice you for my 10%.

• 1:04:36Speaker 01

  You do it. What's 10% of $8? No one knows.

• 1:04:39Drew Afualo?

  We'll split it. We'll split it. You, me and your sister, we'll split it.

• 1:04:43Speaker 01

  And your sister. Uh, now the pie's getting a little bit too small.

• 1:04:47Drew Afualo?

  Okay, yeah, see, we gotta reevaluate that. Yeah. Well, thank you for coming on. I love you. You're amazing. Thank you all so much for tuning into this episode of the comment section. Don't forget, new episodes drop every Wednesday. You can stream the audio on all streaming platforms and the video lives exclusively on Spotify. Make sure y'all follow Zach. He is so funny and so amazing and obviously we're in love now. So go ahead and get with it and I'll see you next week. Bye.