Why I Hate My Birkin

Everyone says a Birkin is an investment. I’m here to tell you why that’s a lie. In this episode, I spill the financial tea on why buying my Birkin was one of my worst money decisions, how the luxury resale market actually works, and why “looking rich” is not the same as being rich. We break down the Birkin myth, the Hermes quota game, resale math no one talks about, and what you should invest in instead (spoiler: not orange bags). Financial Tea with Mrs. Dow Jones is a Sony Music Entertainment production. Find more great podcasts from Sony Music Entertainment at sonymusic.com/podcasts and follow us at @sonypodcasts To bring your brand to life in this podcast, email [email protected] Pre-Order my upcoming book, FUTURE RICH PERSON, here: https://www.mrsdowjones.com/book Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Haley Sacks?

  Okay, we all love to romanticize being your own boss, but even when you have a team, you still end up being the bookkeeper, the marketing department, and the person rearranging appointments at 11:00 PM. And that work isn't just annoying, it is expensive. And it's especially taxing for businesses that run on appointments. So if you own a business that takes bookings, this one's for you. Gloss Genius is a system that runs the operations for you behind the scenes. Scheduling, payments, admin, handled automatically. Payment processing is a flat rate with zero hidden fees. And check out Rebook's clients on the spot. Clients can book in seconds too, so there's no login or separate app necessary. So you actually get more appointments.

• 0:43Haley Sacks?

  125,000 businesses already trust Gloss Genius to earn them more and save them time. Want to try it out for yourself? Go to glossgenius.com and use code FINANCIAL for 50% off your first two months of a premium plan. Okay, so I just gave my apartment a major refresh. And hands down, the hardest thing to get right was the rug. I just couldn't find one that fit right. And I really wanted something that pulled the room together because a rug is a big deal. But then I found Ernesta. And Ernesta's amazing, you guys. It makes designer-quality rugs custom-cut to the exact size of your space, so it actually fits instead of almost fits and looks great the first time. Like in the past,

• 1:27Haley Sacks?

  I've just defaulted to stock sizes when buying rugs. And also, when you're in a New York City apartment, that really just doesn't cut it, but they're all weirdly shaped. But with Ernesta, you can send photos and dimension to Ernesta's design team, and they help you get the size exactly right, completely free of charge. Hand-selected by design experts, Ernesta rugs are beautiful, they're durable, and they're made for the way you actually live. Cut, finished, and delivered in as little as two weeks. Visit ernesta.com and order five samples for only $10, and you will get $50 toward any rug of your choice. That is E R N E S T A dot com.

• 2:09Haley Sacks?

  What's up, rich people? It's me, Haley, AKA Mrs. Dow Jones, and this is Financial Tea. What's up, sippers? Welcome back to Financial Tea. This is the podcast where I teach you how to build wealth with a side of market drama, money scandals, and of course, financial pop culture. And today is a very special episode, which I know that I say probably every episode, but guys, we have a very special guest. Like, it was sort of intense to book this person, this icon, really. And I just can't believe that they agreed to do the show. So I'm going to bring them in.

• 2:50Haley Sacks?

  It's my Birkin. Our guest is my Birkin. Yes, the rumors are true. I do own a Birkin. And please be nice, because the internet is known to actually cyberbully me about this bag, because it is patina. But I think it's in like an Olsen twin sort of way, you know? Definitely not a new Birkin, but a Birkin nonetheless. She's beautiful. She's iconic. She's expensive. And earmuffs, please. I hate her. I like, sort of hate this bag, you guys. So today's episode is all about why I hate my Birkin, why I think that it is crazy that everyone thinks that these are investment bags, what to actually invest in instead.

• 3:32Haley Sacks?

  And yeah, I'm gonna spill the tea on this luxury asset, because, girl, this became a symbol of success and money, and we need to investigate how we got here, and if that's even true. Not because it's not beautiful, it's beautiful. And not because, not because you're not iconic. You are iconic, okay, girl? But it's because buying this was one of the worst financial decisions I've ever made, right behind when I invested in a powdered coconut water company during the pandemic. That is a story for another time. And by the way, we might be out on Birkins, but we are always in on Future Rich Person, my book, which you should preorder at mrsdowjones.com. It is the new rules for building wealth, even if you are broke, stuck, and that billionaire won't text you back. And I promise, it's gonna change your life.

• 4:17Haley Sacks?

  So make sure that you preorder now. But first, let's get into the MDJ Market Report, so we know what's even happening on Wall Street these days. It's brewed fresh daily.

• 4:28Haley Sacks?

  Okay, welcome to the first edition of the Mrs. Dow Jones Market Report. This is basically where I take you through the top stories going on in finance, in market news, in celebrity money pop culture, just so you're up to date and we can geeky a little before the main episode. Okay, first up, the 2026 Winter Olympics are underway. They're in Italy. Everyone is Instagramming their plates of pasta. But what they're not talking about is that the gold medals are actually worth the double what they were in Paris 2024. But here's the catch, they're actually smaller. And that is because gold is trading near all time highs.

• 5:09Haley Sacks?

  And just to fill you in, the reason that gold skyrockets in price sometimes is because it is a safe haven asset. And so what that means is that when people are scared about inflation or politics or geopolitics, they run to gold because it makes them feel like it is a safe place to put their money. Like you can hold it, you can feel it. It's not like money where, you know, someone's just printing it. This is like a finite asset that you have to dig out of the ground. And people have always gone to gold as like a financial safety net. So I feel like this massive price strike just gives us like a vibe check for how people are feeling right now about the economy, about the world. Not great, a lot of unease, which makes sense.

• 5:53Haley Sacks?

  Things are crazy. It's just interesting to see that sort of manifested in the Olympics. I also want to give a shout out to Yuta Leirdam, who is, yes, say with me now, Jake Paul's fiance. That doesn't mean that I stan Jake Paul, but I love Yuta. She is a speed skater and she won gold. And Yuta girl, you know, I'm sorry because it's amazing that you won gold, but like that gold medal that you have is actually gold plated. Yeah, they didn't even use as much gold as they did in Paris for these medals. So like, You know, times are tough, but we're getting through it. Also, Valentine's Day this week, and it is projected that we are going to spend a record $29.1 billion.

• 6:35Haley Sacks?

  But what's crazier is that 35% of people are buying gifts for their pets. And by crazy, I mean, I did that. I fully bought my dog a Valentine's Day gift on Saturday. I hope that he gets me something back. But yeah, it's important to show the people and the canines in your life that you love them by buying them junk that they don't need. In classic American tradition. Also, shout out Jennifer Gardner, one of the best architectural home tours ever, and also now girl boss. Because her baby food company, Once Upon a Farm, just IPO'd for over $700 million. So Jenna Rink would be proud, and I am proud. Because not only did she survive having an ex-husband who has a huge lower back tattoo,

• 7:18Haley Sacks?

  she now has a company that is public on Wall Street. Okay, now we just need to talk really quickly about Elon, which like, as though you know other Elons. Like, it's obviously Elon Musk, not a common name. But yeah, the man is officially knocking on the door of becoming the world's first trillionaire. His net worth is now closing in on $800 billion because he merged SpaceX with XAI. So to put that into perspective, he is now worth more than the entire GDP of the Netherlands. And people always ask, like, how much is an almost billionaire paying in taxes? And the answer is, drumroll please, zero. Zero, because Elon doesn't have a salary, guys.

• 8:03Haley Sacks?

  He just takes out massive loans against his stock, and those loans are untaxable. So yeah, let that sink in. You are actually paying more taxes than the world's almost trillionaire. Okay, now we need to talk about my sworn enemy of state. If they have no haters, I am dead. Buy now, pay later, I'm looking at you. Klarna is trying to get you to use buy now, pay later for your rent. And obviously, I have an issue with buy now, pay later because it makes you buy things that you don't need with money that you don't have. Pretty obvious argument, if you ask me. But what makes me nervous about them getting into the rental market and where I think

• 8:45Haley Sacks?

  that maybe the government should, you know, step in and not let this happen is that the 2008 financial crisis was built on people taking out massive loans for homes that they couldn't afford. And then it all collapsed. The housing market collapsed. And there was a financial crisis, as you know. But if people are renting homes that they cannot afford and using buy now, pay later to finance them, they're probably going to default on those loans, don't you think? Forty-one percent of people who used buy now, pay later last year couldn't make one of their payments. So to me, it just feels like we're going sort of down a slippery slope here. I am not obsessed with the idea that this is happening.

• 9:30Haley Sacks?

  Feels like a Jenga tower, but that's just me. I'll keep you posted. Oh, and then this is sort of cool because I feel like it's really justice for like, blue collar jobs. But for the first time in 50 years, college grads are losing their edge. The unemployment rate for workers with a four-year degree has officially surpassed those with trade school degrees. So we have now reached the point in like, the AI revolution where the smart move is not going to an Ivy League college. It's actually learning a skill. Community college enrollment is up 4%, whereas like, private universities are completely spiraling. Because young people have realized that AI is going to take a lot of jobs. But

• 10:11Haley Sacks?

  AI cannot fix a burst pipe. AI cannot unclog your toilet. AI cannot fix your HVAC machine. AI will never threaten the jobs of people who build the world, but it will threaten the jobs of people who like, run the spreadsheets that manage the people who build the world, if that makes sense. Okay, that's the market tea for this week. Now let's get into the main event, the reason you're all here, why I hate my burkin.

• 10:41Haley Sacks?

  For those of you who don't know what a Birkin is, it is a bag from Hermes that was designed at first for Jane Birkin. She actually was on an airplane and just sat next to this man from Hermes and she was using this huge straw tote as like her carry on bag. And he was like, girl, why are you using that straw tote? And she was like, you know, I've just like never found a bag that really worked for me. And he was like, well, I work for Hermes. And so they spent the whole flight talking about what the perfect bag would be. And then they made this bag for her called the Birkin after Jane Birkin. And it's since just become like this cultural icon. Why I wanted a Birkin in the first place is that I think that I fell for this myth that like,

• 11:26Haley Sacks?

  if you're a successful woman, like all roads do lead to Birkin at a certain point. And like, that is something that is very present in the culture. Like even Alex Earl just signed that big Netflix deal and honey, she left Paris Fashion Week with a big old Birkin, her first. So it's like, when you, when you are making it in this world as a woman, like that is the bag that you're supposed to have slung over your arm. And I subscribed. So on my 30th birthday, to mark the occasion, I was like, okay, I can either invest in the stock market, or my mom has this friend who she won't tell me who the friend is, but the friend is selling a Birkin

• 12:05Haley Sacks?

  and will sell it to me for $7,000. And do I want it? And I was like, yeah, I definitely want it. Fuck the stock market. I'm gonna buy that bag. So I've had her for five years. I probably worn her less than five times. I'm so scared of her, you guys. I'm like, this is a patina bag. Like I said, like, she's not in perfect condition at all. But like, I really do just like live with the fear of God in me about her. Like, I'm like scared of the rain. I'm scared of natural elements. I'm scared someone's gonna steal it. Like, having something so expensive that's physical like this does sort of give me the willies. I thought that $7,000 that I definitely was gonna be able to get it back and that it was actually, this bag was gonna grow.

• 12:49Haley Sacks?

  Go in value because all the headlines are like the Birkin outperforms the S and P 500. It outperforms gold like this bag is an amazing investment. A 2016 study found that Birkins had a 14.2% return over the years of 1984 to 2015. Just to give you context, the stock market usually returns around like 10%. So 14.2%, that's amazing. And it's like this bag that makes you look rich too. So you're getting rich, you're looking rich. I mean, what's not to love? So because of all these things and because I am a girl boss, I did buy one. It is a black 35 Birkin with pebble leather.

• 13:32Haley Sacks?

  And I honestly was really overwhelmed when I got it. Like I remember unboxing it and it did just feel like, wow, like I've entered a new part of my life. Like it felt almost like a graduation ceremony. Like there's a before and there's an after, like I had been crowned part of this special group. You know, like you want access to that club. And it's very much like an if you know, you know, because it's a game to get it. Like even getting it from this woman was a game and it's a game to get them firsthand too. So it just shows that you're like a little bit about that life. You know what I'm saying? Luxury fashion consultant, Robert Burke calls it a rite of passage. Whether you are wearing it with Chanel or Lululemon. And I think I definitely subscribe to that.

• 14:14Haley Sacks?

  And I think as a financial expert, I also fell for it because Wall Street is constantly telling us that this is an investment too. There's literally hedge funds dedicated to Hermes and Birkin bags. Like asset managers are looking at these as a way to get rich. And I saw Wall Street be so into Birkins. I got into them too, like the price tag didn't scare me anymore. Like we have the celebrities telling us that this is a status symbol. We have Wall Street telling us that this is an investment. And then we have influencers online showing you how to get them and, and unboxing them and like building the culture even more. I also thought I was being really savvy. Like I was, like I said, for sure convinced that I was going to at least see the $7,000 if not get a bigger return.

• 14:59Haley Sacks?

  Like I saw that 14.2% return stat and like the hedge fund that tracks Birkins. And I was like, this bag is going to be worth like 30,000 in five years. Like, honey, this is going to be. Priceless, like distressed black Birkin is really going to like change my financial life. But then I had a rude awakening because I was, like I said, being so careful about the bag, like never wearing it. And I was like, okay, like, maybe I shouldn't have this bag. But then like last year, so four years into wearing the Birkin, I'm never actually wearing it because I live in so much fear of like how valuable it's going to be. I'm

• 15:40Haley Sacks?

  like, you know what, girl, like, maybe this life is not for you. Like, maybe your investments are better in the stock market. You don't have to see them. You don't have to touch them. You don't have to be responsible for them. Maybe like having a physical asset like this is too much pressure and you should just sell it. So I was like, okay, let me sell it. So I go online and I start to sort of get quotes from luxury resellers. And what I found was that this whole idea of a 14% return is a complete myth unless your Hermes bag is the most rare, valuable, hard to get one that you've taken exquisite care of and

• 16:24Haley Sacks?

  has basically been hermetically sealed. And the truth is too, that there's a ton of them on the market. There's over a million Birkin bags on the market. So the demand for them has also gone down. And we all know that prices are set by supply and demand. When there's a lot of supply, there's a lot less demand. And the data doesn't lie either. Like, there has been a 36% drop in the value of Birkins on the resale market in the last three years. In 2022, you could get 2.2x the price of the bag on the resale market. And in 2025, it dropped to 1.4x. So the big lie is that these are investment handbags,

• 17:04Haley Sacks?

  like that it should be completely normalized for us to go to Hermes and spend thousands of dollars on a handbag, even though for most people who you see on TikTok doing that, I guarantee like their Roth IRAs are not maxed out because it's a status symbol that will also eventually make you rich. Because it will hold its resale value. And what I'm saying, as someone who's on the other side of that, although I didn't buy my Birkin firsthand, is that the resale value of these bags has been completely conflated. The only Birkins that are really seeing that huge return, that are actually investment pieces, are the ones that are super rare and in pristine condition.

• 17:49Haley Sacks?

  If yours is like mine, and it's like Olson Twin at the airports, just like has lived a life, you're just not going to see that same return. Which makes sense, right? Because if it's an asset, in order for an asset to maintain or grow in value, you have to take exquisite care of it. Which means you basically need to like hermetically seal it, read it a book every night, oil it, kiss it, make sure that it's comfortable and not cold, and like never bring it out of your apartment.

• 18:19Speaker 01

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• 19:20Haley Sacks?

  But these bags are special. Like Hermes really doesn't mess around. Like artisans have to train for five to 10 years before they're allowed to even make one of these bags. Five to 10 years. It's like medical school. Each bag takes a minimum of 18 hours to complete. There's saddle stitching. I mean, it's really beautiful. Like the craftsmanship alone, ooh, I just sounded lip gloss. The craftsmanship alone really like does deserve the price tag, but I don't know. The exclusivity is just like sort of nuts these days. And obviously, I also am obsessed with pop culture and I do feel like I was brainwashed to think that a Birkin does mean that you've made it. And by the way, when I do wear it, like one of those five times, I did feel like I made it. Like it does sort of give you that pep in your rich girl step. But like, you know, the Kardashians, as they've

• 20:05Haley Sacks?

  built their empires, they have huge closets just dedicated to Birkins. We talked about Alex Earl. Even men wear them. Like David Beckham has a huge one that he travels with. Drake has been collecting them for his wife, his future wife. He doesn't even know who she is yet, but like she is gonna have a lot of bags, girl. Oh, and of course, Lauren Sanchez, the moment she got Jeff's credit card, like she has been at Hermes all the duh day. Like wherever she travels, she's in there picking up a new purse. Like if you're rich, if you are successful, if you have like a profile, you're wearing a Birkin. This is the bag. End of story. They are this ultimate symbol of like power and money and just opulence. And like everyone from Becca Bloom to like that random fashion girly

• 20:47Haley Sacks?

  that you follow who somehow went to Paris and got the Hermes appointment and ended up with a Birkin. And like, instead of her feeling so overwhelmed and stressed that she just spent like $15,000 on a bag, she's posting about it with pride to show you that like she has this status symbol and I guess like has made a good money decision. I don't know. They're really in the culture. It's sort of chic.

• 21:13Haley Sacks?

  What's also crazy about the Birkin resale market is that the smaller the bag is, the more valuable it is. Like this is a 35, which is a big bag, but a 32, which is just a little bit smaller, would also not be as valuable as if I have the tiny one. The tiny ones go for 30 to 50% more on the resale market than the bigger ones. So yeah, this black one, it's not trendy, it's not new. I would really be lucky to sell it for what I put into it. So I bought it for 7K. Four or five years later, if I could sell it for 7K, like that would be a good return. Meanwhile, if I could put that 7K in the market when I turned 30, it would be worth $13,700 today, assuming a 10% annual return.

• 21:58Haley Sacks?

  And I could sell it at the click of a button, because that's the other thing. When you're reselling an asset like this, a physical asset, it's the same as when you sell a house. It's all about the market. Like you have to figure out who your buyer is. And depending on what's going on in the world, you could either have more leverage or they could have more leverage. And I think that's something else that I really like about investing in the stock market versus buying these physical assets, is that you can sell your stocks at the click of a button. Whereas when you are buying, even if you buy a house, which is a physical asset, you have to wait for the right buyer to come along and make you that offer that you can't say no to. Which is why they always talk about the four Ds of deal making.

• 22:39Haley Sacks?

  Death, disease, divorce, and disaster, because those are four moments where people are more likely to like be vulnerable and just need to liquidate something.

• 22:50Haley Sacks?

  I'm going to tell you a story about the first time that I bought a Chanel bag, which was firsthand. And you guys, I was like so stressed the night before. Financially, I could afford it. Like, don't worry. I was like in a great place with my business. I was in Paris. I had planned for this. I was going to get the VAT refund. I was so excited. But I go get the bag and I get, I had sort of freaked out at the store because it feels like this really high stakes decision. Sort of the same as if I was like picking a stock or something. Like I think I would be really overwhelmed. And I ended up buying this bag that's actually so ugly. Like I should have brought it today. Put a picture of it. If you're watching the YouTube, it's this like brown Chanel 19 and it's just like is not the vibe. You know what I mean? Like it should have been classic. It should have

• 23:33Haley Sacks?

  been just like a bag that I could wear all the time. And this one is just like such a statement. It's a little, it's that weird like medium size where it's not a tote bag, but it's not an evening bag. And it's like, it's too Chanel-y to really wear every day. Like, I have a lot of issues with it. But even with that bag, I've tried to resell it and that bag is in perfect condition and I bought it firsthand. And guys, I paid, I think, also 7K for that bag and I could maybe get 4K for it. Like, that bag was a big loss. So, you know, it's a tough game to play. And I think that it's sort of looked at the same way as people look at like buying individual stocks where they think that they can just like find the

• 24:12Haley Sacks?

  next apple, but it's really not like that. If I buy any more Hermès bags, it'll be just because I love the bag and I want to wear it because they are, like I said, beautiful. The craftsmanship is crazy. You do feel like a rich like queen when you wear it. I mean, there's something in the water there. You can't deny it. But the resale value just isn't there, you know? And I think you really see this across the board with luxury bags. And it's almost another pink tax on women because we are encouraged and basically expected to have these designer handbags, to have always a statement handbag. It sort of goes back to like the it girl culture of the 2000s. Every girl had the Fendi spy bag, the Balenciaga. Like, there's just been these tropes in fashion

• 24:53Haley Sacks?

  history that have prevailed. But they're really expensive and you should never purchase them unless your finances are in order. And you're buying it from a place of fun instead of a place of investment. You know, like this whole idea of an investment piece really has to go. I actually think it's as bad as girl math because it's not an investment piece. It's a piece, it's gorgeous, it's chic, but it's not an investment. Yes, you can recoup some of your losses, but like, it's not crazy, especially if you use it. And it's even worse with the other brands. Like, the moment that you're buying Saint Laurent or Louis V or like even Chanel, the resale value is not there. It's really Hermès, Chanel and Goyard that have the best resale value. And even

• 25:36Haley Sacks?

  with those bags, if you use them and if the bag that you originally bought is not super rare, then you're never going to get your money out of it. And this has harmed me personally.

• 25:48Haley Sacks?

  This would not be an episode about why I hate my Birkin and about the luxury resale market if I didn't call my friend Joanne, who I have been to Paris and Japan with on luxury bag sourcing trips. Like, I don't think you understand how hard I go with all of this stuff. This is sort of my hobby. And she's right there with me. So we're gonna give her a call because she has way more Birkins than I do. Like, the girl has, we're gonna find out her exact number. I think it's like, almost five. And she, she really knows how to work the game. Like, she's in this world. Oh, she's here. Oh, my God. The Birkin Queen has joined us. Joanne, tell us, how many Birkins do you have? And how did you get them?

• 26:32Speaker 03

  Well, I have more than one, and it's not really good measure to tell people how many you have. And you always keep them in a secure location, right?

• 26:42Haley Sacks?

  So you can't even give us a ballpark? Like, is it more than five? Is it more, like, what's, like, are we in the double digits?

• 26:49Speaker 03

  No, no, no. It's, it's less than five, more than one.

• 26:53Haley Sacks?

  I actually do love wearing a Birkin. I just don't think that they're investment pieces. I think that they have some value. Like, you're not gonna be able, you're gonna be able to recoup more of your money than if it was a different brand. But this idea, like, influencers are always online, unboxing the, oh, this is my investment piece, my investment bag. And I'm like, babe, an investment is the stock market. Like, that bag is a liability. It's chic, it's cool, it's pretty, it makes you feel rich, but it's not gonna make you be rich.

• 27:19Speaker 03

  No, but it's a better purchase than buying two Luweves and a bad...

• 27:33Haley Sacks?

  A bad Prada? That's actually a good way to look at it.

• 27:36Speaker 03

  Do you know what I mean?

• 27:37Haley Sacks?

  Yeah. Like, if you buy one nice one versus...

• 27:40Speaker 03

  Birkin versus...

• 27:42Haley Sacks?

  Three, whatever, like, yeah, like, second-tier designer. Well, I'm excited to buy new bags with you soon. We need to do a shopping trip ASAP.

• 27:52Speaker 03

  Yes, but I think if you're in the market for a Birkin, the best thing to do is to go somewhere where you can see and touch one. There's lots of places, secondhand places, that have them, because you can't do that in the Hermès stores.

• 28:07Haley Sacks?

  No, we were in Japan at their Hermès store, and we tried to touch a Birkin, and they made us wear gloves.

• 28:12Speaker 03

  No, I barely, it's like touching grass, touching a Birkin, very difficult. And so I think you should go to places, there's, you know, your local resale folks. There's lots of vintage stores, you can go in and look at a Birkin and see what size fits you, what color fits you. You really, it's a very, very considered long-term purchase. Like, look, I am 60-plus years old. I did not get this until I was 60-plus years old. So I just, I don't think it's a frivolous thing. I think it's like a thing that has to be considered.

• 28:51Haley Sacks?

  It's a, it's a, it's a like a forever bag.

• 28:54Speaker 03

  Yeah, and you have to have a lot, you have to have some disposable income to have a Birkin. Just be clear.

• 29:01Haley Sacks?

  A hundred percent. Like, but that's what I'm saying, it's like, it should be a fun disposable purchase. It can't be something that you look at as like, this is gonna make me rich.

• 29:08Speaker 03

  No, it has to be fully disposable purchase.

• 29:12Haley Sacks?

  Okay, I love that. I love you and you're a queen and actually I learned so much today.

• 29:19Speaker 04

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• 29:50Speaker 01

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• 30:22Haley Sacks?

  I've always been obsessed with luxury handbags, by the way. Like, I think part of my journey to becoming Mrs. Dow Jones was realizing I need to, I needed to stop prioritizing looking rich and actually work at being rich. Like, when everyone was doing that 2016 throwback trend on Instagram, my 2016 throwback was literally selfies of me at the Celine store with handbags. Like, at that time, I was working the front desk at a Patti's studio. I was working as a page at David Letterman, and I was babysitting a brat named Winthrop. And I still found the time to go to Madison Avenue, visit Celine, and look at the handbags that I could never afford because I just wanted that feeling.

• 31:05Haley Sacks?

  And I think I thought that if I just looked rich enough, like, I would just attract money. But it turns out that that is not a wealth-building strategy that works. You don't magically become rich just because you look like you have money. Like, most people go broke doing that exact thing. And I will say, like, when I started to make real money for myself, of course, my priorities are always to plan for my future, and I'm really good at that. But I always keep money aside for my wants, and so many of my wants have been designer goods, which I know is lame. Like, I know that I am literally falling for, like, this garment that costs probably $30 to make,

• 31:46Haley Sacks?

  but they're selling for $3,000 when I buy, like, a Prada sweater that says Prada on it. But I still, like, that, I just still want it. Like, I can't, guys, like, I don't know what to say. Like, even I bought the Louis Vuitton duffel bag for travel with my, with my initials on it. And like, that was, like, so exciting to me. I think I bought it for my birthday last year for myself. And it's like, I forced myself to use it, but it's actually the worst travel bag in the world. Like, it comes off of the handle nonstop. It barely fits anything. It's like weird because it's a duffel bag, but you're using it as a carry-on. So it's like, sort of odd to put your laptop in there, like... I don't know, but I like I I feel a certain way when I wear it like it's just I I can't help

• 32:31Haley Sacks?

  it. I really like I fall for all of this shit and it's something that I have to really suppress. And that's why honestly, like I do, I can't tell you as like part of this episode that I'm never going to buy another Birkin again. But I think more, it's just like, I think that I'm gonna start wearing this one more casually because she's not really that valuable and I should just enjoy her and enjoy the ride. I think it's fine to literally spend money on whatever you want. Like I getting value out of your money is using it on things that really make you happy. So if like carrying a Birkin really makes you happy, then that's actually like an amazing use of your extra income. But I think the problem with the bag is that we've been gaslit to think that it's this like amazing investment and it's not, you guys.

• 33:16Haley Sacks?

  Like, it's like you will, it's a better investment than second tier designer brands like a Prada or a Loewe, but like, it's not, it's not gonna touch the S and P 500. And if you're prioritizing buying a Birkin over like contributing to your Roth IRA or something, that's not smart. But like, if you've already contributed to all your tax advantaged accounts and like, your brokerage account is popping and you've got some extra income, like, yeah, get a Birkin, enjoy it. Just don't think that it's gonna like pay for your facelift when you're 65.

• 33:51Haley Sacks?

  If you want to buy a new Birkin, you're going to have to build a profile first. Yes, you cannot just walk into Hermes, like some pleb, and ask for a bag. What do you think this is, diva? You need to actually create a relationship with a sales associate and spend the same amount as that bag before on other shit from Chanel so that you build your profile. Translation, you have to spend thousands on shoes, bags, blankets, dog bowls, dog carriers. Not because you necessarily want them, but because you have to reach a one to one spending ratio to get a quota bag. So like, if you want a bag that's 15

• 34:36Haley Sacks?

  $15,000. You need to first spend $15,000 at Hermes to even be offered it. And you have to build a relationship with your sales associate. You gotta be texting that man like, "You up? Happy birthday. What's for lunch today?" You gotta be building that vibe with that person so that when he gets in his quota bags, you're top of mind, you're the front of his list, and he calls you and he says, "Get your ass to Hermes. We're going in the back room. I got something to show you." But what's even crazy about that is you can tell them which bags that you will want as your quota bag, but you're not guaranteed to be offered that. So he could say, "Get your ass down to Hermes. I got something to show you." And you could want a gray Togo Bag 30 with palladium hardware,

• 35:21Haley Sacks?

  and he could give you a 35 purple with gold hardware and say, "Take it or leave it. This might be the only bag you ever got offered. What are you gonna do?" So they also force your damn hand, which is crazy because it's a big investment. Like, if you look at it as the ultimate bag, like this is the one bag that I'm gonna need for the rest of my life, then it's sort of fabulous. Like, you like, you know, if you stop buying everything else and you just buy that, buy once, buy better, great, but don't buy stupid. And what's crazy is in other countries, the spend ratio might be as high as like 1.5 or even 2. Like, in Asia, they're fully making you spend like 30K to be offered even the opportunity to buy a $15,000 bag.

• 36:06Haley Sacks?

  And to me, that's a little MLM-y. Like, that's an MLM, that's a grifter vibe. Like, it's a little bit that girl from high school messaging you on Facebook that she has a really cool opportunity, and then you have to like buy all the Mary Kay products, and then you've gotta resell them and recruit people. Like, it's feeling a little bit MLM. There are even bait products. So like Hermes has those sandals with the H on them, the Oran sandals, or like the Hermes belt with the H, or scarves, that if you buy to reach your quota, signals to the sales associate that you're not a serious customer. And they will also even like check your social medias, check your home address. Like,

• 36:46Haley Sacks?

  they're going to do a full forensic report on you to decide if you are even eligible to be offered one of these bags, which honestly sucks for me because like I do think that I'm gonna want another Birkin down the road. And like, I am putting out a video podcast titled, Well, I Hate My Birkin. So Hermes, if you're watching this, like, just know, like, it's not that I hate the Birkin, it's just that I don't think it's an investment. I think the bag is chic, but I just like, don't think the girlie should look at it as like, an index fund. And I want to be clear, just to be fair, this isn't just Hermes. Like, the luxury game, this is how it works. Like, if you want to get any watch, you need to first build a profile with that watch company. They're not, you can't just walk

• 37:27Haley Sacks?

  into Rolex and get a Daytona. You need to build a relationship with a sales associate at Rolex, buy other watches that are maybe like, not as in demand as that one, and then maybe eventually, they're gonna offer you it. Same with Patek Philippe. And even wine works this way. Top burgundy producers allocate bottles based on your spending history. If you are really at the top of the Hermes game, there's only one person that you're going to do it with, and his name is Michael, and he's based in Paris. And this is Lauren Sanchez's sales associate, this is Kris Jenner's sales associate, this is definitely Alex Earl's sales associate, like, any celebrity that you see with a sick Birkin, they're getting it through Michael. He is so connected, and he has access to all the best bags. And

• 38:11Haley Sacks?

  these women are just throwing goops of money at him. Like, literally Lauren hosted a private shopping event for her bachelorette with him in Paris. So you can only imagine how much all those girls spent. And he will hook you up. But I think that he probably has a lot different access than like, the Joe Schmo who's working the Hermes in Williamsburg. You know what I mean? Like, so you even have to have strategy with that. It's a whole game, and you have to want to play it. And it actually takes a lot of energy, and effort, and of course, money.

• 38:46Haley Sacks?

  To wrap up, Hermes is iconic. I love my bag. I actually do. I don't hate you anymore. Don't worry. But Hermes is a pyramid scheme. It's a luxury hustle wrapped up in designer. Like, let's not fool ourselves. This is crazy. It's crazy that you have to spend money to be able to be even offered this bag and that the culture positions it so much as an investment when you actually look into it, it's not. But I'm only gonna buy it because I can afford it and as a liability. I'm not gonna look at it as something that's gonna fund my future. I'm gonna just look at it as something that makes me feel fabulous. And for the love of God, I'm gonna use the shit out of the bag. Like, this baby, I am going to bring on the

• 39:27Haley Sacks?

  subway. I'm gonna bring to the airport. I'm gonna wear her in the rain. Like, me and you, girl, like, we're about to go on some adventures. You know, like, that's the point. That's how you should use it. And then when I do wanna make money, when I am putting money aside for my future rich person, I'm gonna put it in the stock market. I'm not gonna put it into orange bags because I know the truth, that these are not an investment. They're beautiful bags. They're gonna last forever. They may prevent you from buying other stupid things because you have like, one great thing that you don't need to replace. But you're not gonna be able to resell it for way more than it's worth. And it's certainly not compounding. So yes, I feel like the moral of the story is that looking rich and being rich are two

• 40:07Haley Sacks?

  different things. Only one of them is actually gonna change your life and the other is gonna add to your life, but don't think about it as a safety net of any kind. By the way, I also bought my Kelly. Oh, bet you didn't know I had her too, bad girl. Okay. I actually do wear her a shit ton. Be nice. I love her. Also got her secondhand. She's iconic. She's gorgeous. I am actually, I think, more of a Kelly girl than a Birkin girl, but like, this is the ultimate bag. I wear it all the time. It's such a good size. I love her. But she's not gonna make me rich, but I love her. She makes me look rich and feel rich. And that's powerful, too. Okay, I've gotta go hang out with my bags, but thank you so much for listening to Financial Tea. Be sure to rate and subscribe wherever you watch or

• 40:52Haley Sacks?

  listen to this podcast. It helps the show so much. And remember to email [email protected] if you have any financial tea to share. I read every submission and, guys, like, I'm here for it. Keep the tea coming. Keep it piping hot. Subscribe, follow, and rate. Stay rich. It really helps the show, but seriously, stay rich.

• 41:16Speaker 05

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