MFM Minisode 417

This week’s hometowns include a dog named Turbo and an annual Hot Dog Day.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:06Georgia Hardstark?

  Everyone loves the idea of spending an afternoon curled up with a good book.

• 0:10Karen Kilgariff?

  Well, grow up, because it's almost impossible.

• 0:12Georgia Hardstark?

  Luckily, you can take your next great story with you on Audible.

• 0:15Karen Kilgariff?

  Audible has a massive selection of titles to choose from, including This American Life, new books by Michael Connelly, along with classics from Magathah Christie, and so much more.

• 0:24Georgia Hardstark?

  Whether you want a mystery, a true crime story, or something completely different, there's always something new to listen to.

• 0:29Karen Kilgariff?

  New members can start listening with a 30-day free trial at audible.com/mfm.

• 0:34Georgia Hardstark?

  Audible, stories that speak to you.

• 0:36Karen Kilgariff?

  Goodbye.

• 0:38Georgia Hardstark?

  You know a favorite M-word? Magnesium.

• 0:40Karen Kilgariff?

  Like the kind that's in Dr. Teal's Magnesium Spray.

• 0:43Georgia Hardstark?

  Made from a proprietary blend of topical minerals, it's designed to relax and prepare you for a night of rest.

• 0:49Karen Kilgariff?

  If you need a reset after your day, make Dr. Teal's Magnesium Spray part of your nighttime routine.

• 0:54Georgia Hardstark?

  Generously spritz each foot before bed, and you'll be all set. I've actually started doing this, and I'm obsessed with magnesium. It does everything.

• 1:01Karen Kilgariff?

  Something like this is just like, it's simple, it's easy, and it actually works.

• 1:04Georgia Hardstark?

  Totally. For wellness you can feel, find Dr. Teal's Magnesium Spray online or in your local bath aisle.

• 1:10Karen Kilgariff?

  Goodbye.

• 1:26Karen Kilgariff?

  Hello.

• 1:28Georgia Hardstark?

  And welcome.

• 1:30Karen Kilgariff?

  To my favorite murder.

• 1:31Georgia Hardstark?

  The minisode.

• 1:32Karen Kilgariff?

  Yep, yep.

• 1:34Georgia Hardstark?

  You agree?

• 1:35Karen Kilgariff?

  I think, I think so.

• 1:36Georgia Hardstark?

  Okay, well, think about it and get back to me. Circle back whenever you have a chance, after the holidays.

• 1:41Karen Kilgariff?

  In the meantime, should I read you a story?

• 1:44Georgia Hardstark?

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:45Karen Kilgariff?

  Okay. Should I go first, yeah?

• 1:47Georgia Hardstark?

  Please do.

• 1:49Karen Kilgariff?

  Okay, this is called Family Vacation Turn: Claustrophobic Escape Mission.

• 1:54Georgia Hardstark?

  Karen, Georgia and Co. Y'all have been my constant companions for years and I can't believe I'm just now writing in. During a recent catch up on minisodes, I heard you ask for disaster vacation stories. So here's mine. In the mid zero zeros.

• 2:09Karen Kilgariff?

  Odds, yeah. I like mid zero zeros better, though. Mid zero zeros.

• 2:14Georgia Hardstark?

  Mid zero zeros. My family went on a trip to Prince Edward Island. My little sister and I, insufferable preteen book nerds, were hoping to see every place mentioned in Anne of Green Gables. My dad had other plans. His goal was to visit all the lighthouses on the island. There are over 50.

• 2:33Karen Kilgariff?

  Oh, Jesus Christ.

• 2:34Georgia Hardstark?

  That's a lot of driving around on a vacation.

• 2:37Karen Kilgariff?

  To get out to a point? The end of a jetty?

• 2:41Georgia Hardstark?

  Fucking thing, yeah.

• 2:42Karen Kilgariff?

  To look at a similar thing over and over.

• 2:43Georgia Hardstark?

  Exactly. On a drive to the capital city of Charlton, or Charlottetown, Charlottetown, probably, our dad spontaneously took us to check yet another lighthouse on his list. We were the only people there when we arrived, so we went to take a couple of photos. My sister and I had long since clued into the meaning of the phrase, if you've seen one, you've seen them all. So we weren't too keen to stay for very long. We were about to ask our parents to leave when they saw two college aged girls trying to climb up from the rocky shore with their bicycles.

• 3:14Karen Kilgariff?

  Hmm.

• 3:15Georgia Hardstark?

  My dad asked if they needed help and boy, did they. Turns out, they worked for a cruise ship that was docked in the city and since they had the morning off, they asked a local boat guy, and says captain, to ferry them across the bay so they could bike back into town on the scenic shoreline. When they got halfway across the bay, the boat guy turned off the engine and began pressuring them to drink and take off their clothes since it was so hot.

• 3:41Karen Kilgariff?

  Oh.

• 3:42Georgia Hardstark?

  They were stuck for hours with this creep on open water before he finally brought them to the lighthouse. He boasted that they would come crawling back to him because he was their only way back to the city dock before their cruise ship left.

• 3:55Karen Kilgariff?

  Fucking asshole.

• 3:56Georgia Hardstark?

  I know. The lighthouse was so remote, there wasn't a visitor center where they could get help or any other houses or businesses and no one- Had a cellphone. The girls frantically asked us if we could drive them somewhere and call a cab, and it says, and the police, to come get them. My mom and dad took one look at these two young ladies and, with $2 of their own, decided that calling a cab wasn't gonna cut it. We had no choice but to drive them back to the city dock ourselves. The only problem, our rented two-door Mini Cooper, which was already fit to burst with a family of four. Undeterred, my handyman dad was able to, and then it says dismantle their bicycles,

• 4:37Georgia Hardstark?

  to fit in the trunk while my mom squished the girls and me in the backseat and then shoved my little sister on the floor of the passenger seat between her legs.

• 4:48Karen Kilgariff?

  She's gonna get that moming done. She is not, no girl left behind because of a douchebag man.

• 4:53Georgia Hardstark?

  Exactly. To this day, I'm still not sure how we all fit. We must have broken countless unknown Canadian traffic laws, but we got the girls back to their ship with time to spare and to write a police report, hopefully. They even bought us T-shirts from the Cruz gift shop as a thank you. Looking back on the story, it makes my skin crawl to imagine how badly things might have gone for those girls if my family hadn't been in the right place at the right time. Stay sexy and rent an SUV, Abigail.

• 5:21Karen Kilgariff?

  For real. God. Abigail, I love that your parents are the kind of people that like, oh, we are not only just gonna get involved, we're gonna make this work.

• 5:30Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah. Cause like, who knows what would happen if they like, left them behind and then the guy came back, you know?

• 5:36Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah, like, ugh, ugh, gross.

• 5:40Georgia Hardstark?

  Gross.

• 5:41Karen Kilgariff?

  All right, keep your eyes out for those boat guys. Hey, if you have any positive boat guy stories, we're here, we're here to read them to counter this fucking bullshit.

• 5:49Georgia Hardstark?

  We know, we know, there's positive ones out there.

• 5:51Karen Kilgariff?

  We know there's great boat guys out there. Okay.

• 5:56Karen Kilgariff?

  My first one, subject line, it's the one you've been waiting for. "I may have babysat for a witness protection program kids?" Question mark.

• 6:05Georgia Hardstark?

  That's good.

• 6:06Karen Kilgariff?

  And then it says, "Hello, good people and pets. I've been wanting to write in with this story for a long time. And when I heard the story on episode 454 about the 1978 Lufthansa heist, I knew the time was right. I grew up in a small Appalachian city in the 80s. When I was a teenager, a new family moved in down the block. And as I had a monopoly on the neighborhood babysitting jobs, it wasn't long before they hired me to watch their four kids. About a month after they moved in and during what turned out to be my last babysitting gig with them, the youngest kid, three or four years old, told me about how they had to leave their old house really fast in the middle of the night and couldn't take anything with them. She ended it with, "And then we came here." While she was telling me this,

• 6:51Karen Kilgariff?

  the eldest, maybe 10, got a stricken look on his face and was doing everything he could to get her to stop talking.

• 6:57Georgia Hardstark?

  Oh, no.

• 7:00Karen Kilgariff?

  That's my sister and I all our lives, but we were not in witness protection.

• 7:04Georgia Hardstark?

  Just shut up.

• 7:05Karen Kilgariff?

  Just shut up. Being a kid myself, I'm sure I thought it was just some weird toddler nonsense and didn't really give it a second thought. Until a couple of days later, when I realized they were gone and the house was empty.

• 7:20Georgia Hardstark?

  Those poor kids.

• 7:22Karen Kilgariff?

  I know, those poor kids. It was then, in my 14-year-old budding, murdering no-brain, I decided that I had probably babysat for a witness protection program family. I was convinced the 10-year-old told his parents everything that went down and they high-tailed it out of there. I was so freaked out by this notion that I didn't tell anyone this story until just a few years ago in case the mob came looking for me. Of course, I don't know that they were really in the witness protection program. Maybe they just woke up one morning and decided my town sucked and they couldn't wait to leave. I guess we'll never know. Stay sexy and don't blow your cover, R. And then it says, "Name withheld because, you know, the mob."

• 8:03Georgia Hardstark?

  Oh my God, are you the 10 year old or the two year old listening right now? And was that you? And yes, indeed, you were in the mob. Or no, maybe not in the mob, but you know what I mean? Please email us.

• 8:14Karen Kilgariff?

  Oh, can you imagine?

• 8:15Georgia Hardstark?

  Were you a witness protection family? Like, tell us, we need to know the details. And I know you're gonna say it's way more boring than you think it is.

• 8:23Karen Kilgariff?

  God.

• 8:23Georgia Hardstark?

  But we need to know.

• 8:25Karen Kilgariff?

  Also untrue. It's boring to you because you already went through and it wasn't, it wasn't all day, every day excitement. But

• 8:32Georgia Hardstark?

  No.

• 8:33Karen Kilgariff?

  Compared to walking around in a field full of cows. It's way more exciting. I assure.

• 8:39Georgia Hardstark?

  Oh, man. That 10 year old has chronic anxiety now. I guarantee it. The holidays are coming, which means we'll all be spending more time away from home.

• 8:51Karen Kilgariff?

  Whether you're visiting family or doing something actually fun, you want to know your home is protected while you're away.

• 8:56Georgia Hardstark?

  That's why now is a good time to think about home security with Simply Safe.

• 9:00Karen Kilgariff?

  Unlike traditional security systems that alert you after a break in starts, Simply Safe is designed to help stop intruders before they get inside. These days, you're worried about your house, you're out of town, and then something comes up and you get to look on your phone. And Simply Safe is going to show you not only the video of like, it's a raccoon at your front door, but also that they have staff that's sitting there, they already know. And if it was something different or worse, they would have already been on it.

• 9:25Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah, I really think that's invaluable peace of mind that just like relying on your neighbors, paying attention is not going to give you. We've partnered with Simply Safe to offer our listeners their biggest savings of the year. 70% off your new system with professional monitoring when you visit simplysafe.com/mfm.

• 9:43Karen Kilgariff?

  That's simplysafe.com/mfm. And when you order, write in MFM at checkout and it tells them we sent you and it really helps the show.

• 9:50Georgia Hardstark?

  Simply Safe, ahead of crime in real time.

• 9:53Karen Kilgariff?

  Goodbye. Nothing makes you take a good, hard look at your furniture like inviting people over for the holidays.

• 9:59Georgia Hardstark?

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• 10:02Karen Kilgariff?

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• 10:07Georgia Hardstark?

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• 10:16Karen Kilgariff?

  And with Article's 30-day satisfaction guarantee, you can shop with confidence, knowing that if you're not completely in love with your new furniture, you can easily return it.

• 10:24Georgia Hardstark?

  Plus, Article's customer care team is available seven days a week. I know we're getting into fall and winter, but we live in Los Angeles, so my outdoor furniture is just like the perfect focal point for the pool parties we still end up having. Sorry, everyone, when it's like sunny and gorgeous year round. I sit on my Article patio furniture every morning and have my coffee and watch Cookie Lay in the Sun. And the whole thing is just so peaceful and pretty. Article is offering our listeners $50 off your first purchase of $100 or more.

• 10:54Karen Kilgariff?

  To claim, visit article.com/murder and the discount will be automatically applied at checkout.

• 11:00Georgia Hardstark?

  That's article.com/murder for $50 off your first purchase of $100 or more.

• 11:04Karen Kilgariff?

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• 11:47Karen Kilgariff?

  And when you're ready to launch, use offer code MURDER to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Goodbye.

• 11:56Georgia Hardstark?

  My Mom's Third Man Experience. Hey, guys, I just heard Georgia's story about Third Man Syndrome and my hands are shaking as I write this. I haven't even finished the entire episode yet, but I have to tell you about how my mom's life was saved by her deceased father. Years ago, my mom, Joyce, was working at a Target store on the receiving dock in the back corner of the stockroom. Joyce is such a mom name, isn't it?

• 12:18Karen Kilgariff?

  Such a mom name. From like 1987.

• 12:21Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah, it's good. She was literally standing in the corner by herself, counting items on a pallet, when she felt a massive shove from behind that pushed her away from the corner. She turned around to say, hey, what the hell, to realize no one could have been behind her, her back was up against the wall.

• 12:37Karen Kilgariff?

  Oh.

• 12:37Georgia Hardstark?

  Just then, an entire pallet full of extra shelving fell from the top shelf in the stockroom, near the ceiling.

• 12:44Karen Kilgariff?

  Holy shit.

• 12:46Georgia Hardstark?

  It landed right where she had been standing. Turns out, there were employees in the next aisle, trying to add items to that top shelf, and hit the pallet of shelving, pushing it off the other side. Guys, come on. The security guard had seen it happen on the screen in her office, and came running back to grab my mom and say, we almost lost you. There's no explanation for what pushed mom, and no one else was in that aisle with her on the security camera. Her parents had passed away maybe a year before this, and she says she knows for certain it was her dad that saved her.

• 13:17Karen Kilgariff?

  Hmm.

• 13:18Georgia Hardstark?

  My Papa was an amazing man, and I thank him every day for saving my mom. Thank you for your amazing podcast that gives all of us humor and hope.

• 13:26Karen Kilgariff?

  Oh.

• 13:27Georgia Hardstark?

  Stay sexy, and thank you Guardian Angel Papa Anastasia.

• 13:31Karen Kilgariff?

  Oh my god, Anastasia. I love that one.

• 13:34Georgia Hardstark?

  The like surety that it's her dad is like, so like, got me choked up.

• 13:39Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah.

• 13:40Georgia Hardstark?

  You know, where it's just like.

• 13:41Karen Kilgariff?

  Cause she's like, my dad shoved me like every other day.

• 13:44Georgia Hardstark?

  My dad was a big pusher.

• 13:46Karen Kilgariff?

  Constant. I love to stand under things, like pianos that were dangling out of windows.

• 13:51Georgia Hardstark?

  I can't tell you how many times he shoved me out of the way of danger, and did it one more time.

• 13:56Karen Kilgariff?

  I knew that familiar feeling. But also, I want to know if that security guard that saw it on the camera, saw the shove, where it's all sudden, she goes like that.

• 14:05Georgia Hardstark?

  Totally, me too.

• 14:06Karen Kilgariff?

  That'd be cool. Okay, anyway. The subject line of this email is, Hells Angels Used to Pick Up My Mum From School. Gals, gals, gals, it's time.

• 14:15Georgia Hardstark?

  I love it.

• 14:17Karen Kilgariff?

  I've arrived, I can finally tell the story, and I know you'll get it. I've been here since 2016, UK listener, you got me through it all, we're grown, let's go.

• 14:27Georgia Hardstark?

  Aww. That's cute.

• 14:29Karen Kilgariff?

  I know. In episode 450, you talked about the Hells Angels, and yas, I can.

• 14:35Georgia Hardstark?

  Sorry.

• 14:36Karen Kilgariff?

  Y A S S, Yas. I can finally share my mom's ridiculous connection to them. Back in the seventies, my granddad, my mom's dad, was well-known in the northeast of England, first for being a prize-fighting Irish boxer.

• 14:50Georgia Hardstark?

  Wow.

• 14:51Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah, right? I kind of want to look that up. But also in his later years, as a respected pub landlord. When my mom was around seven or eight, he decided to branch out and purchase a well-known wine bar that had fallen on hard times. What he didn't know is that this bar was often frequented by the Hells Angels.

• 15:09Georgia Hardstark?

  A wine bar?

• 15:10Karen Kilgariff?

  A wine bar.

• 15:11Georgia Hardstark?

  That's so classy.

• 15:12Karen Kilgariff?

  And it was their base for dealing cocaine. That's why.

• 15:16Georgia Hardstark?

  Oh, no.

• 15:17Karen Kilgariff?

  That's why. They're bringing the cocaine where the people who buy cocaine are, the wine bar.

• 15:21Georgia Hardstark?

  That's right. The people have money for cocaine.

• 15:23Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah.

• 15:24Georgia Hardstark?

  The wine bar.

• 15:24Karen Kilgariff?

  Oh, my God. But also kind of hilarious. You're like, do you want to go wine tasting and then just get insanely wired and talk about plans?

• 15:32Georgia Hardstark?

  Let's do it.

• 15:34Karen Kilgariff?

  They end that sentence with, "and was their base for dealing cocaine." Terrific. He tried many different ways to turf them out, including installing mirrors on the walls so he could see everything they were doing, but mysteriously, they would always end up smashed. This went on for a while, until one day, my granddad remembered that if you can't beat them, join them. No, he didn't become a Hells Angel. Instead, he freaking employed them. He made a deal with the head of the gang, and then in parentheses, it says, is that the right term? That if they stopped dealing from his bar, he would give shifts to each of them as doormen.

• 16:09Georgia Hardstark?

  Wow.

• 16:10Karen Kilgariff?

  Right? They were happy to accept the work, and it kept the bar safe, too. After that, because, because that bar was filled with wired lunatics with a bunch of money.

• 16:21Georgia Hardstark?

  Drunk, drunk on red, shitty red wine, probably, back then, Beaujolais and shit. Oh, my God.

• 16:26Karen Kilgariff?

  You know that gorgeous vintage of wine that's from northeast England?

• 16:31Georgia Hardstark?

  That just turns your teeth purple?

• 16:32Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah. And gets you swinging? Okay. Well, after that, my granddad started to get on well with their gang leader, a terrifying guy called Uncle Jim.

• 16:44Karen Kilgariff?

  Who would frequently give my mom a ride on the back of his Harley?

• 16:47Georgia Hardstark?

  Jungle Jim, I get it. Jungle Jim.

• 16:50Karen Kilgariff?

  Jungle Jim. Jungle Jim. So my, Dave Demo, our family friend, who was my age, used to call my dad Jungle Jim.

• 16:57Georgia Hardstark?

  Oh, my God, I love it.

• 16:58Karen Kilgariff?

  He thought it was the funniest. Jungle Jim used to frequently give my mom a ride on the back of his Harley if he ever saw her walking home from school alone. She said she was never scared of him and he kind of resembled a Goth Santa Claus.

• 17:12Georgia Hardstark?

  I can see it. That's perfect.

• 17:14Karen Kilgariff?

  Totally. Anywho, I never got to meet either of my mom's parents as they died young, but gosh, I wish I had the chance. My mom is an incredible human being despite a chaotic childhood, but I will say that my murderino tendencies are down to her as she let me read James Patterson since I was about nine.

• 17:35Karen Kilgariff?

  I now work as a life coach, helping people find joy in these dark times and often listen to the podcast whilst I'm creating slightly more lighter content. Keep going, gals. We will. So thankful for stumbling across you all these years ago. Stay sexy, Meg.

• 17:53Georgia Hardstark?

  Meg, can you coach my life, please?

• 17:56Karen Kilgariff?

  Meg.

• 17:57Georgia Hardstark?

  You're fun. You sound fun.

• 17:59Karen Kilgariff?

  Meg, you're a fucking legend. You're from, you're from, first of all, from what I'm gathering, and I could be wrong. It sounds like an Irish prizefighter fell in love with a British lady and moved to her side of town.

• 18:13Georgia Hardstark?

  Ooh, scandalous.

• 18:14Karen Kilgariff?

  Which is like ultimate Romeo and Juliet. Come on.

• 18:17Georgia Hardstark?

  Totally. Oh, my God.

• 18:19Karen Kilgariff?

  Love it.

• 18:19Georgia Hardstark?

  That's fun. That's great. That was a great one.

• 18:23Georgia Hardstark?

  The holidays are coming, which means we'll all be spending more time away from home.

• 18:27Karen Kilgariff?

  Whether you're visiting family or doing something actually fun, you want to know your home is protected while you're away.

• 18:32Georgia Hardstark?

  That's why now is a good time to think about home security with SimpliSafe.

• 18:36Karen Kilgariff?

  Unlike traditional security systems that alert you after a break in starts, SimpliSafe is designed to help stop intruders before they get inside. These days, you're worried about your house, you're out of town, and then something comes up and you get to look on your phone and SimpliSafe is going to show you not only the video of like, It's a raccoon at your front door, but also that they have staff that's sitting there, they already know. And if it was something different or worse, they would have already been on it.

• 19:02Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah, I really think that's invaluable peace of mind, that just like relying on your neighbors, paying attention is not going to give you. We've partnered with SimpliSafe to offer our listeners their biggest savings of the year. 70% off your new system with professional monitoring when you visit simplisafe.com/mfm.

• 19:19Karen Kilgariff?

  That's simplisafe.com/mfm. And when you order, write in MFM at checkout and it tells them we sent you and it really helps the show.

• 19:26Georgia Hardstark?

  SimpliSafe, ahead of crime in real time.

• 19:29Karen Kilgariff?

  Goodbye.

• 19:30Georgia Hardstark?

  Holiday shopping gets a lot easier when you can find something for everyone.

• 19:34Karen Kilgariff?

  Especially when everyone includes yourself.

• 19:36Georgia Hardstark?

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• 19:40Karen Kilgariff?

  Quince makes beautiful everyday essentials with high-quality materials like Mongolian cashmere, organic cotton, and premium stretch denim. They're the kind of things you love to give as a gift or get yourself.

• 19:51Georgia Hardstark?

  Their 100% Mongolian cashmere sweaters start at just $50. And they also have beautiful 14-karat gold earrings and bracelets that make great gifts.

• 19:59Karen Kilgariff?

  I was so excited when I got home and I got to break out my gray Quince cashmere sweater that I wear constantly around the house. We've been waiting for even the slightest temperature drop so that we could get into sweater weather. And finally, it's here. And I celebrated with my beautiful Quince cashmere sweater that I think I got the second year we started doing ads for them.

• 20:23Georgia Hardstark?

  They laugh.

• 20:23Karen Kilgariff?

  They do.

• 20:24Georgia Hardstark?

  Give the gift of quality this holiday season.

• 20:26Karen Kilgariff?

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• 20:30Georgia Hardstark?

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• 20:34Karen Kilgariff?

  Now available in Canada and the UK, too.

• 20:36Georgia Hardstark?

  And when Quince asks where you heard about them, let them know it was My Favorite Murder. It's the best way to support the show.

• 20:42Karen Kilgariff?

  Goodbye.

• 20:45Speaker 02

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• 21:17Georgia Hardstark?

  My last one is called Dog Snitch. And it starts, howdy. A couple of years ago, after much begging from our kids, we added a beagle mix with a gentle demeanor and fantastic eye makeup. Picture attached to our family named Turbo. This story also involves my son, who has sensory processing disorder and will often put things that are not food into his mouth. His favorites are small objects like buttons and coins. You know, stuff that makes mom freak out when they are in a four-year-old's mouth.

• 21:50Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah.

• 21:51Georgia Hardstark?

  We had Turbo for about six months, when one night he was scratching and barking at our son's door after bedtime. Usually Turbo is pretty chill, so I assume the most obvious thing. My son has snuck a Lego or something into his room to chew on and is now choking to death, and the dog is telling me to get in there and help now. I rushed into the room, Turbo at my heels, to see my son looking surprised and guilty with half a candy bar in his hand.

• 22:19Georgia Hardstark?

  I stood in the doorway, scolded him for sneaking food into his room, and Turbo took advantage of the moment to run in, snatch what was left of the candy bar, and scarf it down as fast as doggily possible.

• 22:31Georgia Hardstark?

  I went in thinking we had adopted a hero dog, to realize that he was a snitch who would sell you out for half a chocolate bar.

• 22:37Karen Kilgariff?

  Hell, yeah.

• 22:38Georgia Hardstark?

  Fortunately, Turbo suffered no ill effects, and the only stitches he got was from a hernia surgery a year later. Get it, snitches getting stitches?

• 22:46Karen Kilgariff?

  Oh, yeah.

• 22:47Georgia Hardstark?

  Stay sexy and hide your chocolate, Megs, she/her.

• 22:51Karen Kilgariff?

  Oh.

• 22:52Georgia Hardstark?

  Another Meg.

• 22:52Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah, two Megs in a row. That's good luck.

• 22:54Georgia Hardstark?

  Oh, here's the, here's Al Hunter with the photo. We'll put it up on Instagram and everywhere.

• 22:58Karen Kilgariff?

  Oh, let me see. Let me clicky.

• 22:59Georgia Hardstark?

  It's a gorgeous dog.

• 23:01Karen Kilgariff?

  Oh, my God. That eyeliner is simply incredible.

• 23:05Georgia Hardstark?

  Truly. Is it tattooed on? I mean, that's just, bring that to like the tattoo, the permanent makeup person and be like, I want my eyes like this.

• 23:13Karen Kilgariff?

  Can you give me one of these? Kind of a permanent coal kajal, I believe they call it. Frank has really good eyeliner, too.

• 23:20Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 23:21Karen Kilgariff?

  Okay, here's my last one.

• 23:23Georgia Hardstark?

  Okay.

• 23:23Karen Kilgariff?

  The subject line of this email is Hot Dog Day, and it starts, one of the best I've ever seen. Enough grab ass, let's get to it.

• 23:35Georgia Hardstark?

  Good one.

• 23:36Karen Kilgariff?

  You say you like hot dogs, then you need to come to my town's annual hot dog day celebration. My little college town of Alfred, New York, located about 80 miles south of Rochester, has an annual hot dog centered festival that you should totally attend.

• 23:51Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 23:52Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah. Each year, on a Saturday in April, our tiny Main Street is closed to traffic and turned into a street festival devoted to all things hot dog.

• 24:02Georgia Hardstark?

  If I were a mayor of a town, that would be every day.

• 24:06Karen Kilgariff?

  That would be your first political move?

• 24:08Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 24:09Karen Kilgariff?

  The first bill you'd sign into law. There are, of course, hot dog vendors, as well as kosher dog and not dogs for vegetarians like me. There's a parade with people dressed as hot dogs, packets of mustard and ketchup, et cetera, as well as fire trucks, adorable little kids from the karate studio dressed in their tiny gees, and all the usual small town stuff. There are games, rides, and of course, the wiener dog races, in which confused dachshunds run around sniffing each other's butts and eventually meandering toward a finish line.

• 24:43Karen Kilgariff?

  This is, this sounds like the best day of all time.

• 24:46Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 24:47Karen Kilgariff?

  Why did our tiny town of 800 souls decide to celebrate all things hot dog? Great question. I don't know.

• 24:55Karen Kilgariff?

  Wikipedia says our hot dog day started in the 1970s, and hot dogs were chosen as the theme because they were cheap and therefore popular with our college students. And also, for those of us who lived through the 70s, it was the recession and times were tough. It was, that was like the gas crisis, money was tight. Yeah.

• 25:16Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah, there was a, here at least, there was a drought, right?

• 25:19Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah, yeah, that's right. All kinds of shitty stuff.

• 25:22Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 25:23Karen Kilgariff?

  Nothing like today. Whatever its origin, Hot Dog Day is a chaotic fun event with all proceeds from the food vendors and games going to local charities. Oh, my God. So if you'd like to cheer on some bewildered wiener dogs while stuffing your faces with everyone's favorite snack, come on over to Little Alfred, New York, and hang with me and the probably two other murderinos who live here.

• 25:47Georgia Hardstark?

  Oh my God, I'm picturing us like at the Rose Parade. The, we're like commentating on it as it goes on below us.

• 25:54Karen Kilgariff?

  Yes.

• 25:55Georgia Hardstark?

  Live, we're live from the Hot Dog Day Festival.

• 25:58Karen Kilgariff?

  And Georgia, if you look right down here, the children and geez are storming up the street to protect us from all the hot dog attacks.

• 26:06Georgia Hardstark?

  That float took 8,000 hot dogs to create. Thank you for the donation from Nathan's.

• 26:15Karen Kilgariff?

  Stay sexy and don't mock the not dogs, Juliana. And then in parentheses, it says rhymes with banana. Like we don't, I can't pronounce Juliana without that help. Thanks, Juliana.

• 26:28Georgia Hardstark?

  Rhymes with banana.

• 26:30Karen Kilgariff?

  Rhymes with banana. That's the best, I mean, these festivals like truly warm my heart.

• 26:36Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah, what's your festival? What's your town festival? We need to know about it. We need to know what goes on in it.

• 26:41Karen Kilgariff?

  Do you think it's any better than the Petaluma Butter and Eggs Day Parade? I doubt it.

• 26:46Georgia Hardstark?

  Man.

• 26:47Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah.

• 26:48Georgia Hardstark?

  That's cool.

• 26:49Karen Kilgariff?

  It is. It's real fun.

• 26:51Georgia Hardstark?

  All right. Well, that was a quick one. Thanks so much for listening and tuning in and all of the things.

• 26:58Karen Kilgariff?

  And if you have a story you'd like to tell us that's interesting and funny and fun that you think we'd like.

• 27:03Georgia Hardstark?

  Or horrifying.

• 27:04Karen Kilgariff?

  Or horrifying, or a true hometown.

• 27:07Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 27:07Karen Kilgariff?

  Or kind of anything in between.

• 27:09Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 27:10Karen Kilgariff?

  Head on over to the MyFavoriteMurder@gmail, which is literally [email protected], and send it in.

• 27:16Georgia Hardstark?

  Please participate if you'd like. We'll give you a trophy, a participation trophy.

• 27:19Karen Kilgariff?

  Get in here.

• 27:20Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 27:21Karen Kilgariff?

  Stay sexy.

• 27:22Georgia Hardstark?

  And don't get murdered.

• 27:24Karen Kilgariff?

  Goodbye.

• 27:25Speaker 03

  Elvis, do you want a cookie?

• 27:35Karen Kilgariff?

  This has been an Exactly Right Production.

• 27:37Georgia Hardstark?

  Our senior producer is Alejandra Kep.

• 27:39Karen Kilgariff?

  Our editor is Aristotle Acevedo.

• 27:41Georgia Hardstark?

  This episode was mixed by Liana Scolacci.

• 27:44Karen Kilgariff?

  Email your hometowns to [email protected].

• 27:47Georgia Hardstark?

  And follow the show on Instagram and Facebook at MyFavoriteMurder.

• 27:50Karen Kilgariff?

  Goodbye.

• 27:57Speaker 04

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• 28:25Karen Kilgariff?

  Calling all amateur detectives and podcast obsessives.

• 28:29Georgia Hardstark?

  Virgin Voyages' second True Crime Voyage sets sail March 20, 2027, for a five-night escape to Grand Turk and the Beach Club at Bimini.

• 28:37Karen Kilgariff?

  As part of the On Air at Sea collection, this immersive sailing brings together fan favorite podcasts, including Disgrace Land, Buried Bones, and Wisecrack, for live recordings, behind-the-scenes access, exclusive meet-and-greets, and crime-themed programming that you won't find anywhere else.

• 28:53Georgia Hardstark?

  All aboard our award-winning, kid-free ships.

• 28:56Karen Kilgariff?

  Head over to virginvoyages.com/truecrime to secure your spot. Goodbye.

• 29:02Speaker 03

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• 29:47Speaker 03

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