Beating the Buffet w/ Kippy & Foley!

Are You Garbage is back with Kippy and Foley for a family episode to answer your garbage questions from Patreon. We got home improvements, Hash with the family and flea markets! Its a fun one! Thanks for watching AYG Comedy Podcast. Love youse guys. Come to a live show! AYG & Friends: https://punchup.live/areyougarbage/tickets Live Shows: https://punchup.live/areyougarbage/tickets PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage MERCH: https://areyougarbage.com/ Blue Chew: https://bluechew.com/ Promo Code: Garbage Rocket Money: https://www.rocketmoney.com/garbage Aura Frames: https://auraframes.com Promo Code: garbage Bombas: https://bombas.com/ayg with code AYG Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

  Welcome to another exciting edition of Are You Garbage? The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash. Now, here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H. Foley.

• 0:19H. Foley?

  Hey, everybody out there, and welcome back to everybody's favorite podcast. This is Are You Garbage?

• 0:25Speaker 02

  Hey.

• 0:25H. Foley?

  It's that little show we sit there with your favorite comedians and we find out they're good to be classy.

• 0:29Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 0:30H. Foley?

  Or just a big ol' piece of trash.

• 0:32Speaker 02

  Yes, sir.

• 0:32H. Foley?

  I'm your host, H. Foley, coming at you on a beautiful day. We're out back here with Tooties and the new addition. She's already into the NyQuil.

• 0:39Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 0:39H. Foley?

  10 o'clock in the morning.

• 0:40Speaker 02

  Could be from the night before.

• 0:42H. Foley?

  Broad shutting it down early, I guess. My co-host is coming at you from across the table. This is what we call a family episode, just the boys, the bozos, and the homies. And he is the CEO.

• 0:53Speaker 02

  What?

• 0:53H. Foley?

  Of Are You Garbage.

• 0:54Speaker 02

  Wow.

• 0:55H. Foley?

  He is an international businessman. He's the flatbread freak, the chicken porn hero, Captain Neptune. Kevin James Ryan, everybody.

• 1:04Speaker 02

  What's up, gang? Shout out to you. First of all, thanks for tuning in.

• 1:07H. Foley?

  Woo!

• 1:08Speaker 02

  Make sure you rate, review, subscribe on iTunes, and I'm told you gotta say Spotify now, too.

• 1:12H. Foley?

  Hello!

• 1:13Speaker 02

  I'm getting that in my monthly reports.

• 1:14H. Foley?

  Rogies!

• 1:15Speaker 02

  Uh, and then, obviously, full video available on YouTube. But then I gotta be on. I'd be remiss.

• 1:20H. Foley?

  Hit me!

• 1:20Speaker 02

  If I didn't hit you with the greatest website of all time.

• 1:23H. Foley?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:23Speaker 02

  www.patreon.com/areyougarbage. You go over there, you get all your bonus content. I'm talking over 400 hours of podcast episodes, sitting over there, waiting for you to join the 13,000 people already there.

• 1:37H. Foley?

  Ooh, the army of garbage out there. Shout out to all the homies.

• 1:40Speaker 02

  The battalions.

• 1:41H. Foley?

  Homies appreciation. If you're not on the Patreon.

• 1:42Speaker 02

  The shareholders.

• 1:43H. Foley?

  Do yourself a favor, get over there.

• 1:45Speaker 02

  The boots on the ground, the sleeper cells.

• 1:48H. Foley?

  That's right. Let me tell you this real quick. I was at Patty's last night.

• 1:53Speaker 02

  Funny you mention that, me too.

• 1:54H. Foley?

  Really?

• 1:55Speaker 02

  Ah!

• 1:56H. Foley?

  Thought I saw some extra small condoms laying around the bedroom.

• 1:59Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's when I finger.

• 2:01H. Foley?

  Ew! Little dental jones. This broad goes, "Are you hungry?" I say, "I could eat." She's like, "I got some frozen pizza in the freezer."

• 2:14Speaker 02

  You're talking to the Pete, the flatbread freak, baby.

• 2:18H. Foley?

  So I'm thinking, "All right, French bread, Elio's."

• 2:23H. Foley?

  DiGiorno, something's coming at me, okay? She pulls it out.

• 2:28Speaker 02

  Me too.

• 2:32H. Foley?

  I'm sure you're pregnant.

• 2:33Speaker 02

  What you doing, what you doing, next I'm on the edge of my seat?

• 2:38H. Foley?

  She pulls it out and it's two regular slices.

• 2:42Speaker 02

  Whoa.

• 2:43H. Foley?

  She froze pizza.

• 2:45Speaker 02

  That's crazy. She knew you were coming, I respect that.

• 2:47H. Foley?

  Which I didn't know, that's gotta be, that's like freezing milk, isn't that illegal?

• 2:51Speaker 02

  I do that all the time, actually.

• 2:52H. Foley?

  You freeze pizza?

• 2:53Speaker 02

  I got five Ruby Roast slices in the freezer right now.

• 2:56H. Foley?

  What the fuck?

• 2:57Speaker 02

  I mean, listen, I-

• 2:58H. Foley?

  Next step is you're freeze drying shit like a psychopath.

• 3:01Speaker 02

  That goes in the fridge and is eaten the next day for breakfast.

• 3:04H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 3:04Speaker 02

  With a couple of scrambled.

• 3:06H. Foley?

  I was like, when the fuck is this from? She's like, the summer, the summer!

• 3:09Speaker 02

  Fuck that.

• 3:10H. Foley?

  Fucking December!

• 3:11Speaker 02

  Nah, that's crazy. Yeah, that's, you gotta, that's got a short shelf life.

• 3:15H. Foley?

  Plot twist.

• 3:16Speaker 02

  Not too bad.

• 3:17H. Foley?

  Not bad.

• 3:18Speaker 02

  Dude, coming out of the freezer is really good. No.

• 3:20H. Foley?

  That's insane.

• 3:21Speaker 02

  I'm not even-

• 3:22H. Foley?

  You're freezing regular slices?

• 3:24Speaker 02

  Yeah, better to reheat.

• 3:27Speaker 02

  See, this is what you encourage.

• 3:28H. Foley?

  Would you see the maid do this when you were younger or something? You fired her immediately, but kept the idea.

• 3:34Speaker 02

  Uh, yeah, that's fucking, that's, you know, these broads are getting older, they're gonna end up in a home pretty soon.

• 3:40H. Foley?

  I mean, I-

• 3:40Speaker 02

  They start putting a cat in the freezer and shit, they don't know. They save everything, they think, they like, go back to, they think it's like wartime, when they're not gonna be able to get another fucking pizza pie delivered in 30 minutes or less.

• 3:51H. Foley?

  I've said it many times here on this podcast and on the Patreon, since my dad has passed, the cooking, the refrigerator, it's fucking real subpar, man. It's a lot of-

• 4:02Speaker 02

  Poor, poor morning woman, and you're over there breaking her fucking stove.

• 4:06H. Foley?

  It's a lot of-

• 4:06Speaker 02

  Keeping your fat ass in za. You ate it, didn't you?

• 4:09H. Foley?

  I had it. I had to put a lot of hot sauce on it, though.

• 4:13Speaker 02

  Really, really-

• 4:13H. Foley?

  Which I had to really dig to find that.

• 4:15Speaker 02

  Church this thing up a little bit.

• 4:16H. Foley?

  It's a lot of fucking, uh, quarter pounds of-

• 4:21Speaker 02

  Weed?

• 4:23Speaker 02

  Ashish?

• 4:25H. Foley?

  Lot of sour diesel for breakfast. No, it's a lot of, it's a lot of quarter pound of, um-

• 4:31Speaker 02

  Lunch meat.

• 4:32H. Foley?

  Chick, no, chicken sa- the lunch meat, yo.

• 4:34Speaker 02

  They, they stopped, they will-

• 4:35H. Foley?

  The lunch meat, you don't go near, because this fucking broad knows that we break her balls about throwing up the lunch meat, she'll take the old stuff and put it in a new thing.

• 4:43Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's crazy.

• 4:44H. Foley?

  And then put the new stuff in a Ziploc bag.

• 4:45Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 4:46H. Foley?

  I don't know what the fuck I'm eating.

• 4:47Speaker 02

  Uh huh, yeah.

• 4:48H. Foley?

  The cheddar's Munster, the Munster's Swiss, don't go near the pepper jack.

• 4:53Speaker 02

  That's my pepper, Jack.

• 4:54H. Foley?

  That was turkey a couple of weeks ago.

• 4:57Speaker 02

  Yeah, no, it's, I've also, as, you know, my, my mother is a widow herself. It's, things are, things are, that's what brings us up. I was actually down at Denise's, Denise the Pizza's, too.

• 5:08H. Foley?

  Does the piece drink pomegranate juice? That's the only good addition to the house.

• 5:12Speaker 02

  Nah, she's more of a-

• 5:12H. Foley?

  She's got that pomegranate.

• 5:13Speaker 02

  She's more of a-

• 5:14H. Foley?

  That palm, that's alright.

• 5:15Speaker 02

  More of a Pinot Grig kind of gal.

• 5:18H. Foley?

  That pomegranate juice with a little bit of club soda in is very refreshing.

• 5:21Speaker 02

  Um, but, uh, you know, uh, we've, that was the house I grew up in. She's been in that house thirty something years at this point. Never made any real big improvements on it.

• 5:31H. Foley?

  I would love to snoop around that pantry. I bet you got some fucking-

• 5:35Speaker 02

  Well, she's got the kids over there now, so it's a little, you know, from time to time, so it's a little more-

• 5:39H. Foley?

  I bet you got some old Cheez-Its in there. Probably boxes handwritten.

• 5:43Speaker 02

  Nah, she was never Cheez-It. She's a goldfish gal and them things are hard to keep on a shelf. Those things go quick.

• 5:49H. Foley?

  Sure.

• 5:50Speaker 02

  Um, especially if I get down there, open up a fucking screaming can of Coke.

• 5:55H. Foley?

  You're fat ass.

• 5:55Speaker 02

  Yeah, and I'll just, while we're talking, I'm munching those while I'm putting an order in over at fucking Dominix or something. I'm crushing, I'm going, I'm like fifty-five pieces, baby.

• 6:05H. Foley?

  Little Amuse bouge.

• 6:08Speaker 02

  But she's doing a, uh, you know, two, three, she's sprucing the place up a little bit.

• 6:12H. Foley?

  Oh, I didn't know this, is she?

• 6:13Speaker 02

  Little bit, little bit, like, you got a new coat of paint.

• 6:15H. Foley?

  Sex swing? What are we talking about?

• 6:16Speaker 02

  Jesus Christ. She listens to the program.

• 6:19H. Foley?

  You said you had sex with my mother!

• 6:21Speaker 02

  I said I was fingering her.

• 6:23H. Foley?

  And I'm not sure if you're joking or not.

• 6:24Speaker 02

  That's different.

• 6:25H. Foley?

  Broad gets around.

• 6:28H. Foley?

  She's talking about bringing some, some lackey to the wedding.

• 6:31Speaker 02

  How you doing?

• 6:34H. Foley?

  I was like, you wanna-

• 6:35Speaker 02

  I'll be there, son.

• 6:37H. Foley?

  You wanna find some dick over there, go ahead, but you're not bringing anybody over.

• 6:40Speaker 02

  Jesus Christ.

• 6:42H. Foley?

  He's walking me down the aisle. What's your name again? Fuck off, me pussy.

• 6:48H. Foley?

  Playing him at basketball.

• 6:51Speaker 02

  Getting your ass kicked.

• 6:52H. Foley?

  Fucking pussy. Some old nom vet kicking the shit out of me.

• 6:57Speaker 02

  But, uh, she's doing, you know, a couple of renovations, sprucing a place up, got a paint job, hasn't been painted in a long time.

• 7:03H. Foley?

  On the inside.

• 7:04Speaker 02

  On the inside.

• 7:04H. Foley?

  The whole house?

• 7:06Speaker 02

  Uh, yeah.

• 7:07H. Foley?

  Really?

• 7:07Speaker 02

  No. Ah, I don't think so.

• 7:09H. Foley?

  On the outside?

• 7:10Speaker 02

  Yeah, she went candy paint. Ah, choice.

• 7:14H. Foley?

  Yeah, make go do it. Oh, gun, gun, gun metal.

• 7:19Speaker 02

  She put, she put the couch on a set of twenties too. Ah, choice.

• 7:25H. Foley?

  Windows are all tinted?

• 7:27Speaker 02

  Smells like black ice in there.

• 7:30H. Foley?

  Geez, she painted the outside of the house?

• 7:32Speaker 02

  No, inside, inside.

• 7:32H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 7:33Speaker 02

  Like the hallway, and I think that's it.

• 7:35H. Foley?

  Do something with that basement down here.

• 7:37Speaker 02

  Ah, she flooded it.

• 7:38H. Foley?

  Jesus.

• 7:39Speaker 02

  Yeah, she, she left a hose on.

• 7:40H. Foley?

  What, did you go in there and take a dump?

• 7:42Speaker 02

  She left a hose on out front.

• 7:44H. Foley?

  What, the hose on?

• 7:45Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 7:45H. Foley?

  What's she doing out there?

• 7:46Speaker 02

  That's what I said. I don't know. She was watering the flower, flowers or something. Flooded and, like, left it on, and I guess there's like a crack somewhere down in there.

• 7:56H. Foley?

  Jesus.

• 7:57Speaker 02

  My brother was like, well, I'm glad the flowers look nice, because the basement's fucking, it's like raging waters down there.

• 8:04H. Foley?

  God damn it.

• 8:04Speaker 02

  But, all taken care of. I saw everybody in the family's constructions. Everybody goes over there, fucking.

• 8:09H. Foley?

  She's sprucing up to get it on the market or something like that?

• 8:11Speaker 02

  I don't know. You're asking a lot of personal, financial questions. I don't know what she's doing. She's retired.

• 8:16H. Foley?

  I mean, I'll take it off her hands.

• 8:17Speaker 02

  She's retired. She's, oh, you moved into my childhood home? Start breaking all the furniture?

• 8:22H. Foley?

  She's still living there?

• 8:23Speaker 02

  Oh, but it got me thinking what she did. One noticeable thing, uh, she changed the doorknobs on the inside of the house. Like the, all like the interior doorknobs.

• 8:37H. Foley?

  Like in, like, for, like, the closets in the bedrooms?

• 8:39Speaker 02

  The bedrooms, the closets, the, yeah, yeah, yeah. Which I never really thought about.

• 8:43H. Foley?

  Where'd she go with eight balls?

• 8:46Speaker 02

  Big dice.

• 8:49Speaker 02

  Nah, she went skull and crossbones. Something tasteful. No, they're nice, but they're black, uh, lever ones. It's like orgy shit. It doesn't feel...

• 9:00H. Foley?

  All the doors now open from the middle?

• 9:03Speaker 02

  It doesn't feel like the house I grew up in anymore. You know what I mean? Since she's making the changes.

• 9:08H. Foley?

  That's a real dirtball thing to do, too. Just change the fixtures. Patty's gotten away with that.

• 9:14Speaker 02

  Sure, sure.

• 9:15H. Foley?

  Everything's the same, but the knobs are different.

• 9:17Speaker 02

  Well, that's, yeah, yeah, yeah. So that's what she's doing. A fresh coat of paint, whitewashing it, and then, you know, fresh coat of paint and, uh, some new hardware.

• 9:26H. Foley?

  Sure.

• 9:27Speaker 02

  Right? And it just doesn't feel like the home I grew up in.

• 9:31H. Foley?

  She don't want you there.

• 9:32Speaker 02

  I know, she don't.

• 9:33H. Foley?

  Changing the locks.

• 9:35Speaker 02

  She did change the coat on the fucking garage门.

• 9:37H. Foley?

  Of course she did.

• 9:38Speaker 02

  That's fucked up. Said it's been the same thing for 27 years. So you shut me out?

• 9:42H. Foley?

  Keep you from stealing the power washer.

• 9:44Speaker 02

  I guessed it.

• 9:47Speaker 03

  6'9", 6'9".

• 9:49Speaker 02

  420.

• 9:53Speaker 02

  So...

• 9:54H. Foley?

  6'9", 6'9".

• 9:55Speaker 02

  That got me thinking of what they originally were and, um, what were the, what were the interior? Cause I think it said, it made me start thinking about it. And different homes have different levels of doorknobs, which say a lot about the house.

• 10:10H. Foley?

  Oh, yeah.

• 10:11Speaker 02

  What were, cause mine were, pull up, I, whatever the first one I sent you were. This one's a nicer one than we had. So that's like a current day one, but...

• 10:19H. Foley?

  Nah, that's what we had.

• 10:20Speaker 02

  Yeah, it was the bronze with the hole, like the gold with the hole.

• 10:23H. Foley?

  Good bronze. Well, that looks nice.

• 10:24Speaker 02

  That's newer. That's like of today's, that's the today version of it.

• 10:27H. Foley?

  Alls I know is I could...

• 10:28Speaker 02

  Ours were duller than that.

• 10:30H. Foley?

  I could, yeah, duller than that, and I could get into it with, um...

• 10:34Speaker 02

  Like a bobby pin or a pin or something.

• 10:36H. Foley?

  Not a bobby pin. It had to be one of those combs that had the, that had the, the shiv on the end of it. You know, I'm talking about one of, one of those, it's, it's like a handle comb, but it goes down to a fine point. Yeah, I think it was for teasing up the hair.

• 10:48Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 10:49H. Foley?

  Doing the pubes.

• 10:51Speaker 02

  Yeah, straightening them out.

• 10:52H. Foley?

  Frosting the tips, as they say.

• 10:54Speaker 02

  Uh huh.

• 10:54H. Foley?

  But you could get in there.

• 10:55Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 10:56H. Foley?

  Cause my brother, God love him, he couldn't take a shower or fucking go into his bedroom and lock the door. I would always fucking pop that thing open.

• 11:04Speaker 02

  So that's what we had, but then I started doing a little fishing around. And there was a, there was a version of that. That's a rough.

• 11:11H. Foley?

  That's what we're talking about.

• 11:12Speaker 02

  That's a rough, that dude, that was, those stainless steel ones, they never, they were always like replacements, so they never hooked in.

• 11:20H. Foley?

  I think ours were the, the gold colored ones, but that, that looks, that looks like the lock that was on my door. And it was like that, exactly like that, for a long time, from like 13 to 15.

• 11:32Speaker 02

  That door's been kicked in.

• 11:34H. Foley?

  Yeah, my dad, yeah, my dad would regularly kick in the door.

• 11:38Speaker 03

  Waving the faux faux.

• 11:39H. Foley?

  Sure.

• 11:39Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 11:40H. Foley?

  Yeah, I'd be in there, the place would be a mess.

• 11:42Speaker 02

  Uh huh.

• 11:42H. Foley?

  How the fuck are you going? Miss you buddy. Love you pal.

• 11:48Speaker 02

  If you're looking back, I'm gonna be missing this one day. I know it sounds crazy. You're gonna miss me screaming at you.

• 11:52H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 11:53Speaker 02

  Um, but those were also middle of the road, I think a little less, do you, I was trying to find a picture, I couldn't fucking find it. Do you remember the ones? Because also too, to me, these are heavy. The lock really, especially when you're going to the bathroom, you go to the bathroom at someone else's house.

• 12:11H. Foley?

  Mm-hmm.

• 12:12Speaker 02

  The lock sometimes didn't, there are not a lot of security in some of them locks.

• 12:16H. Foley?

  No.

• 12:17Speaker 02

  Right? So that, so the next one, my aunt had these, and these dude, these things, but you could.

• 12:24H. Foley?

  It's a skeleton key.

• 12:25Speaker 02

  A strong breeze would open that up. That, that didn't really last.

• 12:29H. Foley?

  The ghosts like to open those.

• 12:30Speaker 02

  You're sitting there taking a boom boom.

• 12:32H. Foley?

  It wouldn't catch.

• 12:32Speaker 02

  Oh, never caught, or it would stick sometimes and it wouldn't, you know, like the, the lock wouldn't pop out.

• 12:39H. Foley?

  Those are good doors.

• 12:40Speaker 02

  They're nice, those are really, they were always, obviously always an older, more like, like Victor, I guess Victorian.

• 12:45H. Foley?

  Never had the keys for those.

• 12:47Speaker 02

  Oh, you get locked in there.

• 12:48H. Foley?

  Oh, you lose a kid.

• 12:49Speaker 02

  Yeah, you're fucked up.

• 12:51H. Foley?

  You're riding it out until dinner's over.

• 12:52Speaker 02

  My last apartment, one of the apartments I had in the Heights had that doorknob.

• 12:56H. Foley?

  On the front door?

• 12:57Speaker 02

  In the bathroom, and me and, me and Nadine got locked in there one time, it was a five.

• 13:01Speaker 03

  You're more liable to get locked in the room with those.

• 13:03Speaker 02

  Those things, that's what I'm saying, that's like, that's from like the fucking 60s. That technology didn't hold up.

• 13:09H. Foley?

  No.

• 13:09Speaker 02

  All the fucking steam and shit from the shower, that's fucking warping that wood, you're fucked.

• 13:14H. Foley?

  And you see with how that door was white and you're saying what Denise did? Patty, uh, one step trashier, we have the cheap Luon doors as our bedroom doors.

• 13:24Speaker 02

  What's a Lu, what is Luon door? How do you spell that?

• 13:27H. Foley?

  Lu, oh, come on, Jesus, give me flashbacks. Um.

• 13:32Speaker 02

  Leon doors?

• 13:33H. Foley?

  Luon.

• 13:34Speaker 02

  L U A N.

• 13:35H. Foley?

  Luon, it's wo- it's hollow wood.

• 13:38Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, the dark hollow wood.

• 13:40H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 13:40Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 13:40H. Foley?

  So that's what we had growing up. And then at some point she just painted them.

• 13:45Speaker 02

  That never takes.

• 13:46H. Foley?

  To look, no.

• 13:47Speaker 02

  Never takes.

• 13:48H. Foley?

  Looks bad.

• 13:48Speaker 02

  Never ta- especially if you're-

• 13:49H. Foley?

  Looks bad.

• 13:50Speaker 02

  Especially if you're doing it yourself, it never fucking takes.

• 13:53H. Foley?

  Of course she did it herself. What you think, you fucking spending money for that? But you know what's funny is I was taking a shower in there. And she had that bathroom done.

• 14:00Speaker 02

  That's a nice bathroom.

• 14:02H. Foley?

  She had that bathroom done probably, I don't know, 2003 or something like that? That's fucking 20 years ago, it still looks great.

• 14:10Speaker 02

  Well, that was the thing, there was a big-

• 14:12H. Foley?

  I hated the guy that fucking did it.

• 14:13Speaker 02

  Sure, there was a big difference between home improvements past 2020 versus before 2020.

• 14:22H. Foley?

  Why?

• 14:22Speaker 02

  Like, things just got more affordable and nicer, like you could get nicer stuff.

• 14:27H. Foley?

  Sure.

• 14:27Speaker 02

  And it now still looks more modern than if you did it in 98 or whatever.

• 14:32H. Foley?

  You said 2020.

• 14:33Speaker 02

  After, I'm sorry, sorry, after 2000, I apologize, yeah, after 2000, things started getting more-

• 14:38H. Foley?

  Sopranos hit.

• 14:40Speaker 02

  Shh.

• 14:40H. Foley?

  Everybody wanted it.

• 14:41Speaker 02

  Sure, but you know what I'm saying, you could get, stuff was cheaper, like those fucking mosaic, you played the whole thing.

• 14:46H. Foley?

  Open the ports up.

• 14:47Speaker 02

  What?

• 14:48H. Foley?

  Open the ports up. A lot of China money coming in.

• 14:52Speaker 02

  Yeah, but there was one that I couldn't find, so imagine like, it was like a regular, it was like a circle, a silver circle doorknob with, and the lock was most of the center of it. And it had the long slit, and you would like turn it, do you remember, you would have to turn it in like a 180. You have to like kind of pinch it.

• 15:09H. Foley?

  Oh, oh, wh- wait.

• 15:11Speaker 02

  So it was like this, so it was like a cer- and then like, the whole-

• 15:13H. Foley?

  Oh, oh, oh, I know.

• 15:14Speaker 02

  The whole circle.

• 15:15H. Foley?

  It looked like, it looked like a, like an oven dial.

• 15:17Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 15:18H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 15:18Speaker 02

  Though you couldn't trust those things at all.

• 15:21H. Foley?

  That was like being a jigsaw.

• 15:22Speaker 02

  You're in there pulling your little putt or whatever, that, yeah, those things gave you no-

• 15:26H. Foley?

  Those little patters are fucking dangerous too, that one right there. You missed it. The Schlange Plymouth.

• 15:34Speaker 02

  Schlage.

• 15:35H. Foley?

  Schlage Plymouth.

• 15:36Speaker 02

  That's a Schlage's a proper brand.

• 15:37H. Foley?

  Sure.

• 15:38Speaker 02

  You want to lock it, you lock it with a Schlage. That's their motto.

• 15:41H. Foley?

  Is it really?

• 15:41Speaker 02

  You want to lock it, lock it with a Schlage.

• 15:43H. Foley?

  That's pretty good.

• 15:43Speaker 02

  Uh huh.

• 15:44H. Foley?

  Hey, that one, you're fucking pulling it. They get you with a fucking clothespin.

• 15:48Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 15:48H. Foley?

  You start laughing at your penis. Rude.

• 15:51Speaker 02

  Yeah, but it was, uh, it was funny. It was like one of those memories I had where I'm like, whoa. This house is now different based on that. Probably very cheap upgrade. Like, I don't know what a, like a, what a fucking doorknob goes now. Probably like 18 bucks or something like that.

• 16:05H. Foley?

  Damn.

• 16:05Speaker 02

  Mm hmm.

• 16:06H. Foley?

  She changing the locks on you over there, huh?

• 16:08Speaker 02

  Changing the locks. Still the same doors, same thing, painted the doors, though.

• 16:11H. Foley?

  Wow.

• 16:11Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 16:12H. Foley?

  She's trying to fucking get you off the fucking scent.

• 16:14Speaker 02

  Get me off the books.

• 16:15H. Foley?

  Jesus Christ.

• 16:17Speaker 02

  Uh huh.

• 16:17H. Foley?

  Kim, let's talk about DraftKings.

• 16:18Speaker 02

  DraftKings.

• 16:19H. Foley?

  Gang, as you know, football has a way of turning one game into a full week of conversation and DraftKings keeps you close to it all. DraftKings Sports App is now live in all 50 states. Let's say it again. DraftKings Sports App is now live in all 50 states. We're talking everywhere, baby. Follow the teams you love, keep up with the biggest games and experience the excitement of football all week long.

• 16:41Speaker 02

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• 17:26Speaker 02

  $50 in rewards issued every seven days via click to claim for 21 days. One non-withdrawable reward redeemable. Terms at dkng.co offer. Limited time offer. Nationwide based on Sportsbook predictions and free to play sports contest availability varies by state. Now, back to the show.

• 17:44H. Foley?

  Back to the show.

• 17:45Speaker 00

  Your sausage McMuffin with egg didn't change, your receipt did. The sausage McMuffin with egg extra value meal includes a hash brown and a small coffee for just $5.00. Only at McDonald's for a limited time.

• 17:58Speaker 04

  Pricing participation may vary. Promotion pricing may be lower than meal pricing.

• 18:01H. Foley?

  Boys, you take your BlueChew today? Nah, of course you didn't. That's why she's giving you dirty looks. Listen, we get older, we all need a little help in the bedroom. The blood's not pumping, couple extra pounds. Do yourself a favor, get some BlueChew, man.

• 18:16Speaker 02

  Next stop, boner town, baby.

• 18:18H. Foley?

  You'll be knocking the bottom out of it. Do yourself a favor. Do her a favor.

• 18:22Speaker 02

  Men and women all love a big, hard boner, okay? And BlueChew is the way to that.

• 18:28H. Foley?

  There you go.

• 18:29Speaker 02

  It's the same active ingredients as Viagra. It's online, first of all, online service that delivers the same active ingredients as Viagra.

• 18:35H. Foley?

  Discreet packaging.

• 18:36Speaker 02

  Cialis and Levitra at a fraction of the cost and in chewable form. BlueChew tablets are made in the USA. I'm talking homegrown bones, baby. Shipped directly to your door. That's all done online. There's no weird doctor visits, no awkward conversations, no like, eh, you know what I mean? Things ain't what they used to, whatever. No waiting in line at the pharmacy, comes right to your door. BlueChew wants men rock hard, and listen, so does AYG. Uh, that's the mission of BlueChew. They will not stop until every man is bricked up like a brick house, till every tent is pitched, till every rod is raised. Discover your options at BlueChew.com, and we got a special deal for our audience. You can try BlueChew free, just pay $5.00 for shipping at checkout when you visit BlueChew.com.

• 19:18Speaker 02

  That's BlueChew.com to receive your first month free. Visit BlueChew.com for more details, important safety information, but we thank BlueChew for sponsoring the podcast. Do it.

• 19:26H. Foley?

  Yeah. Kent, we gotta talk about Rocket Money.

• 19:28Speaker 02

  Rocket Money!

• 19:29H. Foley?

  Cause gang, you think you know how many subscriptions you got going?

• 19:33Speaker 02

  You don't.

• 19:34H. Foley?

  You got a lot more.

• 19:35Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 19:35H. Foley?

  Rocket Money helps you cancel those subscriptions, helps you follow your spending, lets you know what you spent last week, last month, lets you look at those numbers and say, hey, I gotta cut back here, I gotta pick it up here. You know what I mean? So do yourself a favor, get over to Rocket Money and get your finances all straightened up.

• 19:56Speaker 02

  Yeah, I'm a big fan. I love getting the weekly updates. I got one today. Hey, you spent too much over here. Hey, a big, big charge detected. I was like, is that Burger King?

• 20:05H. Foley?

  Sobbing moment when they hit you with that.

• 20:08Speaker 02

  It is, but it's fantastic. Listen, we are not financially literate and Rocket Money is helping us wrap our heads around spending, around money, what to do, what to buy, bing. Listen, I get drunk and I'll order some, some sort of streaming event and then next thing you know, I'm signed up online.

• 20:23H. Foley?

  Got a jazzercise her on the way.

• 20:25Speaker 02

  Yeah, I'm signed up for shit I don't know. Bada bing, they, they tell you, you hit it, they'll cancel it for you. It's fantastic. I was, I told you, I signed up for some like Eastern European fighting event or something like that.

• 20:38H. Foley?

  This guy's trying to learn Swahili.

• 20:40Speaker 02

  Rocket Money came in and said, nah, not my boy. Stop charging them. Uh, so stop wasting money on things you don't use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to rocketmoney.com/garbage. That's rocketmoney.com/garbage. One more time, rocketmoney.com/garbage. Do it. Uh, but that's neither here nor there, gang. We got a gosh darn family episode on our hands. Uh, when you guys know, when you join the Patreon over there, uh, you get to ask your garbage question on the air.

• 21:04H. Foley?

  Right by Kevin Ryan, everybody.

• 21:06Speaker 02

  Whoa, hey, with new doorknobs and all.

• 21:08H. Foley?

  Look at this guy.

• 21:09Speaker 02

  Uh, all right, let's see. This one, I'm shocked this never came across our desks.

• 21:16H. Foley?

  Hit me.

• 21:16Speaker 02

  This is from Nick. Hey, gang, $10 wedding donator. What's trashier? In the cabinet, cups facing up or cups facing down?

• 21:25H. Foley?

  Cups facing up.

• 21:26Speaker 02

  Is trashier?

• 21:27H. Foley?

  Trashier.

• 21:28Speaker 02

  I don't know about that.

• 21:29H. Foley?

  That is, that is restaurant 101.

• 21:32Speaker 02

  Yeah, but the restaurants sit on the mat to let it breathe.

• 21:35H. Foley?

  You don't have a, you don't have a thing in there?

• 21:37Speaker 02

  I don't think so.

• 21:38H. Foley?

  Oh, yeah, we have a, we have the, that stuff, that netting.

• 21:41Speaker 02

  Yeah, but that stuff's like that rubber, you need like an industrial restaurant, that fucking.

• 21:46H. Foley?

  It's not a fucking Chili's. We're not moving that. We're not, we're not turning tables like that.

• 21:50Speaker 02

  That mat's grody. That's not letting enough. You need, this is my take, personal take. I think you go up unless you have a proper thing in there.

• 22:00H. Foley?

  No, the bugs and all that stuff get in there.

• 22:02Speaker 02

  Bugs get in where?

• 22:03H. Foley?

  Get into the cups and dust fall into the thing. It's upside down for sure. Proper way to store glassware.

• 22:08Speaker 02

  They only did that in a dust bowl, I think. That's why. I mean, there's no bugs in my fucking kitchen cabinet.

• 22:15H. Foley?

  Sure there's not.

• 22:16Speaker 02

  They're in there with the spices and stuff and the flour, having a, having a field day. Not, everybody knows there ain't nothing to eat in there.

• 22:22H. Foley?

  All fucked up on garlic salt. Proper way.

• 22:27Speaker 02

  I'm not saying you're wrong, but I'm saying I don't think that-

• 22:28Speaker 03

  The correct way is rim side up. Rim side down is for like glasses, like, you know, like whiskey glasses and stuff like that that you don't use as often.

• 22:36Speaker 02

  Here, rim side down. You can store glasses rim side down to prevent dust from collecting. This is especially true for glasses that are used less frequently or stored in the back of a cabinet.

• 22:46H. Foley?

  That's rim side down. So it's supposed to be up.

• 22:47Speaker 02

  Rim side up, this is, yeah, rim side up is technically the correct way to store glasses because the rim is the most fragile part. It's especially important to store fine glassware like crystal and vintage barware, which I use a lot. I use a lot of crystal.

• 22:59H. Foley?

  I have- I got a couple of wine glasses. I have them hanging.

• 23:04Speaker 02

  You work at a Bennigan's? What, you live in a Bennigan's?

• 23:06H. Foley?

  I have above the bar.

• 23:07Speaker 02

  Ah.

• 23:08H. Foley?

  Yeah, we have a little, a little thing that slides underneath the cabinet.

• 23:11Speaker 02

  I know what Matt, you're talking about.

• 23:14H. Foley?

  Yeah, it's thin.

• 23:15Speaker 02

  Yeah, I don't think, that thing gets-

• 23:16H. Foley?

  You turn them over.

• 23:18Speaker 02

  They're gross. Listen, I know what you're supposed to be doing. I don't think you're... That gets gro- that gets Charles grody on you.

• 23:26H. Foley?

  I flip them.

• 23:27Speaker 02

  No, you don't.

• 23:28H. Foley?

  Every Saturday. When I cut my lemons.

• 23:32Speaker 02

  When I do, when I do my side work?

• 23:33H. Foley?

  Do my pre-shift.

• 23:34Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's a great, I never thought about that.

• 23:36H. Foley?

  Are you stacked up in there?

• 23:38Speaker 02

  The glasses?

• 23:39H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 23:39Speaker 02

  No.

• 23:40H. Foley?

  Cause we have, we have multiple pint glasses that are stacked up.

• 23:44Speaker 03

  That's trashy.

• 23:44Speaker 02

  That's trashy, no.

• 23:45H. Foley?

  Is it?

• 23:45Speaker 02

  Yeah, I don't do that. We don't have any pint glasses like that.

• 23:47H. Foley?

  For our car bombs.

• 23:49Speaker 03

  Hey, dropping or pouring. That's a big, big thing when you do car bombs.

• 23:54H. Foley?

  I'd never, I-

• 23:55Speaker 02

  Dropping or pouring.

• 23:56Speaker 03

  You always drop.

• 23:57Speaker 02

  Yeah, but sometimes they, well, sometimes if you, if you're ordering at, you know, I don't, I didn't always frequent fine establishments. A lot of times the bartender don't like washing it. He order eight car bombs. That's their fucking nightmare. They're in the weeds at a Flyers, Flyers or Phillies are on or some, cause we used to do it every, every time a home run. If we were watching the Phillies playoff homerun, meant car bombs. Same thing if the Flyers scored in like a playoff game was car bombs.

• 24:22H. Foley?

  Jaeger and Guinness, right?

• 24:24Speaker 02

  Guinness, no Guinness and whiskey and Baileys.

• 24:26H. Foley?

  Oh.

• 24:26Speaker 02

  Jameson and Baileys.

• 24:27H. Foley?

  Jesus.

• 24:27Speaker 02

  And you drop it, but you can only drop it if you have an actual pint glass and an actual shot glass. But they don't like doing all that fucking laundry.

• 24:35H. Foley?

  They get the plastic ones.

• 24:35Speaker 02

  So hey, sometimes they would, and if you're ordering them, they're like, oh, these fucking idiots, this is gonna be like the fifth one tonight. They give you a plastic cup, so you gotta fucking pour, cause then you gotta, they get a floater, that'd jam you up.

• 24:46H. Foley?

  I wouldn't do car bombs with the gla- I was scared the glass was gonna shatter and I was gonna swallow glass.

• 24:51Speaker 02

  That's part of it, you're running the risk when you're fucking partying.

• 24:53H. Foley?

  Meanwhile, I'm sniffing whatever in the bathroom.

• 24:55Speaker 02

  Yeah, sniffing glass.

• 24:57H. Foley?

  Gives a shit.

• 24:57Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 24:58H. Foley?

  Yeah, I don't wanna, I don't, I always thought it'd be a bad with that.

• 24:59Speaker 03

  So what, did you not do them, or did you pour them in?

• 25:01H. Foley?

  I wasn't a car bomb guy, I wasn't a Guinness guy.

• 25:03Speaker 02

  That didn't hit, car bombs hit, the bombing.

• 25:08Speaker 02

  The bombs really hit when, when I was banging, in my teens to twenties. Jaeger bombs, car bombs.

• 25:15H. Foley?

  We were doing golden schlogger.

• 25:17Speaker 02

  You and the other girls?

• 25:21H. Foley?

  Apple teenies, you know?

• 25:22Speaker 02

  Apple teenies, I would, that was before me, but apple teenies was big.

• 25:26H. Foley?

  Sure.

• 25:26Speaker 02

  I always, every move, everything, apple teeny, apple teeny.

• 25:29H. Foley?

  Sex in the City.

• 25:30Speaker 02

  Is that what it was?

• 25:31H. Foley?

  Cosmos, Sex in the City, Apple teenies.

• 25:34Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 25:34H. Foley?

  Casual sex, too. One broad got after it. Shout out to Samantha.

• 25:39Speaker 03

  They all did.

• 25:40H. Foley?

  Woo, love that camp control.

• 25:42Speaker 02

  Uh, alright, this one's from OkayBuddy, great name.

• 25:44H. Foley?

  That's pretty good.

• 25:45Speaker 02

  OkayBuddy.

• 25:46H. Foley?

  OkayBuddy.

• 25:47Speaker 02

  Long time ten dollar bozo, never had one read, is it garbage if your gym is inside an old grocery store and they didn't remove the cart corrals from the parking lot? That's a tough look. But those things are probably hard to get rid of and dispose of.

• 26:02H. Foley?

  Sure.

• 26:02Speaker 02

  Those things are fucking anchored down in there.

• 26:04H. Foley?

  You do pushups and shit on those.

• 26:06Speaker 02

  Yeah, you hang pullups and shit, yeah, to work out like you're working, you're working out in jail.

• 26:10H. Foley?

  There you go.

• 26:11Speaker 03

  It's more common than you think, there's a lot of those gyms that take over just like big, like.

• 26:14Speaker 02

  The big space.

• 26:15Speaker 03

  Ross's or whatever.

• 26:16Speaker 02

  Yeah, that may, I mean, it makes sense, but I feel the corrals are a tough look, but at the same time, you're working on your fitness, you don't really give a fuck.

• 26:23H. Foley?

  A lot of gas stations don't get rid of the tank. You know that, when a, when a gas station closes down, they don't get rid of the tank.

• 26:28Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 26:29H. Foley?

  My dad told me that, it's real expensive.

• 26:31Speaker 02

  Real expensive to get off of, yeah, and then, uh.

• 26:33H. Foley?

  Don't drink the water in there.

• 26:34Speaker 02

  Yeah, so it's like a Starbucks pops up or something, or a Subway, and it's like fucking.

• 26:39H. Foley?

  You're gonna borrow time for a sinkhole.

• 26:40Speaker 02

  Yeah, drinking fucking ninety-three, dog.

• 26:43H. Foley?

  Let it, let's go.

• 26:45Speaker 02

  Uh, alright, in this, also in the same vein, uh, this is international man of garbage. Is a garbage who drinks soda out of the can with a straw, it always rubbed me the wrong way.

• 26:56H. Foley?

  Get the fuck out of here with that shit.

• 26:58Speaker 02

  Yeah, no, right?

• 26:59H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 26:59Speaker 02

  I don't, I've never done-

• 27:00H. Foley?

  Unless you're, unless you're in fucking double cast or in a coma or something like that.

• 27:05Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 27:05H. Foley?

  That's weird.

• 27:05Speaker 02

  Yeah, if you're in a hospital bed, I'll let it slide, because you gotta bring it to ya. My aunts always did that. Girls, women did it.

• 27:13H. Foley?

  Yeah, chicks, I guess.

• 27:14Speaker 02

  My one classy aunt, Aunt Kate, shout out to ya, I, she said one time, I handed her-

• 27:19H. Foley?

  Only drank tall boys.

• 27:22Speaker 02

  And car bombs. She's, she's dropping in car bombs. But she hit, she hit me with it, she goes, "Oh, I don't do tinnies." I handed her, she's like, "Can you get me a diet coke?" I handed her a diet, I can't-

• 27:31H. Foley?

  Oh, you told me this, yeah.

• 27:32Speaker 02

  And she goes, "I don't do tinnies."

• 27:34H. Foley?

  Tinnies. I don't like the lead.

• 27:36Speaker 02

  But that's it, that's, I think I've mentioned this before, that's a New York thing, when I first moved, you buy a beer. You buy like a fucking can, you buy a pounder of Bud Light.

• 27:43H. Foley?

  Because of the rat shit.

• 27:44Speaker 02

  Because of the rat shit and piss, they give you straws, and I'm like, fucking miss me when it's just rub your fucking, rub it on your shirt.

• 27:50H. Foley?

  I've only started to think about when those, like, when these were made, or like, when the sodas were made, and how long they've been sitting in some warehouse, or on some shipping container, or something like that.

• 28:03Speaker 02

  I don't worry about that at all.

• 28:05H. Foley?

  That's why, if I get, sorry, if I get candy, I always do the holiday stuff, because you know it's fresh.

• 28:11Speaker 02

  Nah, they, they, they push that years.

• 28:14H. Foley?

  Don't, to think?

• 28:15Speaker 02

  I know they do. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I used to work in a chocolate industry.

• 28:18H. Foley?

  Oh, that's right, I forgot. That's how you made your first million.

• 28:21Speaker 02

  Don't buy dollar store candy, I'll tell you that much. Get a little bit of kippy sweat in there.

• 28:26H. Foley?

  You had all that Stover's money, Stovers, love a good Stovers, you like a Stovers? Russell Stovers, little assortments, I eat them all.

• 28:34Speaker 02

  Oh, really?

• 28:36H. Foley?

  I like the variety.

• 28:37Speaker 02

  Nah, coconut can kick fucking rocks.

• 28:39H. Foley?

  Whitman's, nice Whitman sampler.

• 28:41Speaker 02

  Uh-

• 28:41H. Foley?

  Why don't you get me something nice for the holiday, give me, when I use Whitman's sampler, and shut the fuck up, let me enjoy myself.

• 28:46Speaker 02

  I got, I got you something nice, it's in Hawaii, the fucking day before Christmas.

• 28:52H. Foley?

  God damn it.

• 28:53Speaker 02

  Jamming me up. Um, alright, let's see here. This one's from Jessica. $10 homie, never had one read.

• 28:58H. Foley?

  Jesse!

• 28:59Speaker 02

  First of all, shout out to the $10 homie. If you're a homie, you know $10 is the way to go.

• 29:04H. Foley?

  You appreciate value.

• 29:05Speaker 02

  Uh, best value, best value on the internet, I would say, for the $10 level. "Is it garbage for the school bus to drop you off at a job?" Oh, god, dude. "In high school, I was dropped off at the subway I worked at inside of a gas station."

• 29:21H. Foley?

  What the fuck?

• 29:22Speaker 02

  Tough look.

• 29:23H. Foley?

  How does the school, that's a fucking wellness check right there.

• 29:26Speaker 02

  Yeah, I mean...

• 29:28H. Foley?

  Who else was getting dropped off there? Where the fuck does this, does the bus start making, it's on an Uber.

• 29:33Speaker 02

  I would assume that's a handshake deal you got with the bus driver.

• 29:37H. Foley?

  Hey, listen, do me a favor.

• 29:38Speaker 02

  Or, like, you know, a lot of times, uh, back when I was banging, if I wanted to go somewhere after school, like, say I was, like, the fifth bus stop getting, like, off.

• 29:51H. Foley?

  Mm-hmm.

• 29:52Speaker 02

  And I wanted to go to, like, my buddy's house that was further on the route.

• 29:56H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 29:56Speaker 02

  I would get off closer to his house. You know what I mean? I would get on my bus, pass my bus stop, like, this, this...

• 30:04H. Foley?

  Oh, they wouldn't say something to you?

• 30:06Speaker 02

  What?

• 30:06H. Foley?

  Oh, we couldn't do that?

• 30:07Speaker 02

  I would just be like, "Oh, I'm going to fucking Matt's or something."

• 30:09H. Foley?

  Nah, we couldn't do that. I guess it was still the 90s and they were still worried about kids getting yanked.

• 30:14Speaker 02

  I mean, they were more worried about kids getting yanked in the fucking 2000s.

• 30:17H. Foley?

  I don't know, they were tight. We, if he saw, "Hey, what are you doing?", he'd stop. "You gotta go back." "You gotta get off, you gotta, you had to get off at your stop."

• 30:23Speaker 02

  I think, yeah, but I think we could massage that a little bit. I mean, I did it, but... You couldn't get on another bus. You weren't allowed to do that.

• 30:31H. Foley?

  Oh, they'd shoot ya. Kidding me?

• 30:34Speaker 02

  I remember it.

• 30:35H. Foley?

  God damn, no-fly list.

• 30:36Speaker 02

  There was a kid always on the bus when we got on the bus. He was coming from, like, the tech school or something. He was at high school. We were in junior high. And I went to school with his brother. And his older brother would be on the bus, who was like my older brother's age.

• 30:51H. Foley?

  When you got on in the morning?

• 30:52Speaker 02

  No, in the afternoon. He got picked up from-

• 30:54H. Foley?

  They got out at like 12:30.

• 30:56Speaker 02

  He got picked up from halfway. I don't know where, or some sort of program, institutional program.

• 31:02H. Foley?

  Yikes.

• 31:03Speaker 02

  And he would be on there bragging about, I mean, first of all, he was about your size at 17. He was a big boy.

• 31:10H. Foley?

  Good looking kid.

• 31:11Speaker 02

  And listen, you are, you're a good looking bigger guy. This guy was-

• 31:15H. Foley?

  You think so?

• 31:15Speaker 02

  What? This guy looks more like a toe.

• 31:18H. Foley?

  Get off my dick, will you? Trying to bone.

• 31:21Speaker 03

  They tried to get me with that too. They, they wanted me to go on the special needs bus because it was shorter. And because there was a tight turnaround for my bus stop. So they wanted me to go on the special needs bus to get dropped off in kindergarten.

• 31:35H. Foley?

  Wait a minute, hold on. To pick you up at the house?

• 31:38Speaker 03

  Uh, to drop me off.

• 31:40H. Foley?

  To drop you off after school?

• 31:41Speaker 02

  Yeah. That's what your parents just told you.

• 31:43H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 31:44Speaker 02

  That's, I mean, you just putting that together that your parents were like, this kid has special needs? We're gonna lie to them and tell them that like, hey, your normal bus is long.

• 31:53H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 31:54Speaker 02

  This one's good.

• 31:55H. Foley?

  The helicopter's not coming today.

• 31:57Speaker 02

  Yeah, man, you are.

• 31:59H. Foley?

  You ever see the kids in the station wagon, the school station wagon?

• 32:02Speaker 02

  No, we had a, we had like an Astro van.

• 32:05H. Foley?

  I don't know who was in, that's like Hannibal Lecter shit.

• 32:08Speaker 02

  Getting dropped off in like an ambulance or something.

• 32:10H. Foley?

  Dude, I remember a proper old school station wagon that said school on the back of it. School was spelled with two O's and three K's.

• 32:19Speaker 03

  Two O's, you said it right.

• 32:22H. Foley?

  I was on the short line. So when you, so when you were leaving school. What a tight turnaround. What is this guy? He's a fucking Delta? What do you mean?

• 32:32Speaker 03

  It's a tight loop.

• 32:33H. Foley?

  Were there other kids that got off at your stop?

• 32:35Speaker 03

  No, it was like proper like-

• 32:37Speaker 02

  Yeah, they were in the wheelchair.

• 32:39Speaker 03

  They were all, I put my foot down quick. It was like second grade and I was, my house is close to school, so I would just, that's when I started walking home.

• 32:47H. Foley?

  I'm saying your regular bus. Didn't other kids get off at your neighborhood?

• 32:51Speaker 03

  No, no one on my street was the same age as me.

• 32:54H. Foley?

  Plus you probably had that four mile driveway walking all the way up.

• 32:56Speaker 02

  Had to get to the gate.

• 32:57H. Foley?

  Dempsey Manor.

• 33:01Speaker 02

  The school bus couldn't turn around in the circular driveway.

• 33:05Speaker 03

  That's why I started taking Uber Blacks home.

• 33:07H. Foley?

  It's probably someone didn't carry you to school. Good night sleeps, huh?

• 33:11Speaker 03

  I got a giant Hodor.

• 33:12H. Foley?

  Shut up, Fennington!

• 33:13Speaker 03

  Carrying me on his back.

• 33:14H. Foley?

  Take me to homeroom!

• 33:15Speaker 02

  Oh, god, man. Jam up city. But getting dropped off at work in high school is...

• 33:21H. Foley?

  Poor kid.

• 33:22Speaker 02

  She's out there working. She's probably got a great work ethic.

• 33:24H. Foley?

  The subway at fucking a gas station? I stay clear of ooze.

• 33:29Speaker 02

  I mean, I'm fine with... It was tough when Dunkin' Donuts started going in the gas stations for me, but I got over pretty quickly once the hash browns dropped.

• 33:36H. Foley?

  And that Baskin Robbins, when those two teamed up. Fucking Planet went to hell in a handbasket. Started writing on the wall.

• 33:42Speaker 02

  You could never get the Baskin Robbins. It was mainly Dunkin' focused.

• 33:47H. Foley?

  That guy did not want to scoop your ice cream.

• 33:49Speaker 02

  No.

• 33:49H. Foley?

  Trying to get a taste out of that guy? Fucking cursing at you under your breath.

• 33:53Speaker 02

  Sure, meanwhile...

• 33:54H. Foley?

  Every Sunday came with a little bit of spit.

• 33:56Speaker 02

  He's got bagels burning. You're asking, "Let me taste 31 flavors."

• 34:01H. Foley?

  You don't know what bubblegum ice cream tastes like, you fat little bastard?

• 34:05Speaker 02

  Uh, alright, let's see here. This one's from Noodles.

• 34:08H. Foley?

  Shout out to him.

• 34:09Speaker 02

  Uh, $10 homie never had one ready. "Is it garbage you insist on getting a flat top haircut as a seven-year-old fat kid because I was an Arnold Schwarzenegger ride or die at the time?" Dude, that, I mean, that was 90's. A flat, a hot, sharp, new, fresh, flat top in the 90's. Woo! That thing was tight. They loved the high and tight in the 90's.

• 34:32H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 34:33Speaker 02

  The fuck...

• 34:34H. Foley?

  Sharp.

• 34:35Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 34:36H. Foley?

  One of my biggest regrets...

• 34:37Speaker 02

  90-degree angles on that, John.

• 34:38H. Foley?

  One of my biggest regrets is, uh, I did a production of Biloxi Blues at the Hedgerow Theater, uh, in my training, and we went and got our haircuts, and I could've got a flat top and didn't. And it was just regular buzz. I looked like an idiot. Cause I don't have, my hair's real thin, so it looks like I'm...

• 34:57Speaker 02

  Mine too.

• 34:59H. Foley?

  So it looks like I'm balding, but a flat top really would've brought the character home.

• 35:02Speaker 02

  What characters you do in Biloxi Blues?

• 35:04H. Foley?

  Kowalski. I was the love interest. Kowalski. I think it was Kowalski.

• 35:11Speaker 02

  I don't know.

• 35:11H. Foley?

  I was the mean guy.

• 35:14H. Foley?

  Kowalski.

• 35:15Speaker 02

  Whatever. You stunk.

• 35:17H. Foley?

  Where is he?

• 35:18Speaker 02

  Private...

• 35:21Speaker 02

  You're more of a Captain Haley kinda guy.

• 35:24H. Foley?

  Captain Haley? Where do you see him?

• 35:27Speaker 02

  Or Corporal Haley.

• 35:28H. Foley?

  I don't remember that guy.

• 35:29Speaker 02

  That's what you look like though.

• 35:30H. Foley?

  That must be the Broadway production. The European production. That's Broadway's production. Ain't fucking lumping in with him. Was that Walk- oh yeah, Walken was in the movie. Man, I forgot. He was great. Now, you ever see that?

• 35:41Speaker 02

  No.

• 35:42H. Foley?

  Neil Simon. Very good.

• 35:43Speaker 02

  I'm more of a Paul Simon guy. How you doing?

• 35:48H. Foley?

  More of a Garfunkel man.

• 35:50Speaker 02

  More of an Oates guy.

• 35:53Speaker 02

  Overnight.

• 35:54H. Foley?

  Like a guy that hits the high notes, you know what I'm saying? Little falsetto.

• 35:57Speaker 02

  None of that baritone bullshit.

• 35:58H. Foley?

  Anybody can write the tracks. Talking about a guy coming over the top over the drum kit. Old Phil Collins.

• 36:05Speaker 02

  Uh...

• 36:06H. Foley?

  Treat me right.

• 36:08Speaker 02

  Um, alright, let's see here. This one's Mark W. Is it garbage if your whole family gambles on the length of the speeches at your cousin's wedding? That's a good time. The speeches, listen, I hate a speech at a wedding. Hate it. I'm unemotional. I- I- I get it's just too much. I don't love it. I get that a lot of the family loves it. I get that the- the- it's very nice for the bride and groom. Not for me. But, that would make it very interesting if you're- you pull a little action on it. You know what I mean?

• 36:43H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 36:43Speaker 02

  That I can get behind. Some are just too long. Hit it sweet at 90 seconds and get the fuck out of there.

• 36:48H. Foley?

  I mean, this is well documented. You brought this up, but...

• 36:52H. Foley?

  You know, I got the fucking- I got the recipe for fucking success. That's the one thing I know how to do. And I've told thousands of homies and bozos what to do. Get up there, you don't go too funny, you don't go too sincere, you don't start crying, you thank her, you thank him, you thank the families, you say something nice about him, you say something nice about her, then you hit him with the H. Foley toast and you get the fuck out of there.

• 37:16Speaker 02

  What's that? Those with a little bit of cream cheese on it?

• 37:20H. Foley?

  Bacon bits? It's more of a French toast.

• 37:23Speaker 02

  It's actually chives, that's my secret.

• 37:27H. Foley?

  Yeah, of course.

• 37:27Speaker 02

  Uh, alright, let's see here. The Milkman, uh, is it a great name? Is it garbage you're gonna tattoo at a flea market? I didn't even know you could do that. Also, somebody commented, "My uncle did that." So apparently, I guess it, I would assume, lower-end flea markets.

• 37:46H. Foley?

  Do you like a flea market, Kevin?

• 37:47Speaker 02

  I love, love, love, love a flea market. Me and my wife were driving in the burbs, nah, no more than two, three weeks ago.

• 37:58H. Foley?

  Uh huh.

• 37:58Speaker 02

  I see a real ragtag flea market.

• 38:01H. Foley?

  You stopped?

• 38:02Speaker 02

  Oh, we pulled in.

• 38:03H. Foley?

  Wow.

• 38:04Speaker 02

  I pop, she was not a fan, uh, of it. I just love-

• 38:09H. Foley?

  People on their last legs, selling their last belongings.

• 38:11Speaker 02

  Well, you know it's a bad flea market when the wooden tables are out there, even when the flea market's not there. You drive by the lot and all the, all the tables are there. There's a handful I grew up around where they're just like, in an empty lot on the side of the road.

• 38:29H. Foley?

  There was the Montgomeryville Mart that we used to go to, that was like a flea mart, but it was there all the time. Did you ever go to Rice's?

• 38:36Speaker 02

  I, I love Rice's.

• 38:38H. Foley?

  We used to go there-

• 38:39Speaker 02

  I used to, I, that's how I wrapped my tele, I wrapped my first Lumen around a telephone pole cut in school going to Rice's.

• 38:45H. Foley?

  Man, you were going to Rice's during the week? That's where you got your Chinese stars and stuff.

• 38:49Speaker 02

  It was only, that's where you got our butterfly knives. It was only Tuesdays and Saturdays. Let me see if you can get a Rice's flea market, right, Bucks County.

• 38:59Speaker 02

  Pull up the web, the actual website for it.

• 39:01H. Foley?

  They don't have a fucking website.

• 39:02Speaker 02

  Yeah, they do. Rice's Sale and Country Market.

• 39:05H. Foley?

  Ooh, look at that.

• 39:06Speaker 02

  Shops Tuesdays, so Saturdays-

• 39:08H. Foley?

  Ah, that's nice. Now, it wasn't like that when we were kids.

• 39:11Speaker 02

  Uh.

• 39:11H. Foley?

  There was no potted plants.

• 39:13Speaker 02

  No.

• 39:14H. Foley?

  There was some fucking Mexican shake weed. Yeah, that's where you wanna go, right there.

• 39:19Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, the Amish-

• 39:19H. Foley?

  That kid right there'll give you eggs that'll fucking blow your hair back.

• 39:22Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm. Yeah, it was, uh, I mean, I haven't been in 25 years. But that's where you could get solid fireworks. And I think the butterfly, there was one, I think we wanted switchblades or something. And the switchblade guy was only-

• 39:37Speaker 00

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• 39:49Speaker 04

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• 39:53Speaker 05

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• 40:18Speaker 02

  They were on Tu- we had to go on a Tuesday for some reason, I forget why. So we would cut, yeah, like we'd cut school and go up on Tuesdays. I didn't even make it out of the neighborhood until I crashed my car.

• 40:28H. Foley?

  We would go there after, so Friday after Thanksgiving, we would go to the King of Prussia Mall for the day with like the five or four or five families. Everybody go up there, embarrass ourselves. And then Saturday, a smaller squad would go down to Rice's. They didn't take the kids a lot on those things. I don't know why. They're tricking down there or something.

• 40:52Speaker 02

  Turning tricks, couple of jobs.

• 40:54H. Foley?

  Shooting dice, but it would, they would only take a couple of kids. Gangs, nothing does the holidays like Aura Frames, baby. The easiest gift to give this holiday season. Do yourself and your family a favor. Hook everybody up this year. Make this the Aura Frames year. Where you blanket the block with Aura Frames. Get it for your mom, your mother-in-law, your sister. Everybody wants the pictures. We're taking all these pictures, nobody's looking at them. Aura Frames, you throw it on the counter, you throw it on the mantle, you're uploading fresh pics. Everybody gets to keep up what's going on with the family. I mean, talk about a genius idea.

• 41:33Speaker 02

  Fantastic. It's so, it's so good that it's a one-stop-shop for most people in your life. If you haven't done, I'm running into trouble where I've done it for most people already over the past two years.

• 41:44H. Foley?

  Double dipping.

• 41:44Speaker 02

  I've been giving everybody them, but listen, it's that good of a gift. You go, oh, here, boom, you're good, boom, you're good, boom, you're good. Out the frickin' door. Right now, for a limited time, visit AuraFrames.com and get $45 off Aura's best-selling Carver Matte Frames by using promo code GARBAGE at checkout. That's Aura, A-U-R-A, Frames.com, promo code GARBAGE. This exclusive Black Friday and Cyber Monday deal is the best of the year, so don't miss out. Terms and conditions apply. Do it.

• 42:09H. Foley?

  Yeah. Gang, let's talk about Bombas.

• 42:10Speaker 02

  Bombas.

• 42:11H. Foley?

  Let's talk about socks.

• 42:12Speaker 02

  Yes.

• 42:13H. Foley?

  Let's talk about how important socks are. Are you wearing shitty socks right now?

• 42:17Speaker 02

  Most people are.

• 42:17H. Foley?

  Like, right now, is, is the socks coming down over your ankle? Do they feel loose? Does one sock feel tighter than the other? Then you need some Bombas, baby. Socks are important. You're on your feet all day, and we got the best pair of socks that you're ever gonna have, and Bombas makes them.

• 42:34Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's a perfect holiday gift for your, anybody in your life, cousin, the bird, the boss, the nephew, the secretary. Uh, no one says no to a, a great-feeling pair of new socks.

• 42:45H. Foley?

  Hey, you ain't lying.

• 42:46Speaker 02

  I know, it's great. It's like, it's like, kinda the jokey thing, "Oh, you got me socks?" It's like, nah, these are,

• 42:51H. Foley?

  Socks.

• 42:52Speaker 02

  The Cadillac of socks.

• 42:53H. Foley?

  These are socks.

• 42:53Speaker 02

  Uh, they also have their slippers designed with marshmallow-like femri, memory foam that are all wrapped up in sherpa. Once you put them on, you're never gonna take them off. Plus, they got a great mission. No matter what you get, your purchase creates a very real clothing donation for someone experiencing housing insecurity during cold months. Something like a new pair of socks can make a big impact, and thanks to Bombas loyalists all over the world, they've donated over 140 million essential clothing items.

• 43:19H. Foley?

  Who else is doing that?

• 43:19Speaker 02

  Fantastic. Uh, you think you'll love Bombas, but even if you don't, you're still covered totally free with an easy return or exchange. So here's the turkey, gang. Head over to Bombas.com slash AYG. Use code AYG for 20% off your per, your first purchase. That's B-O-M-B-A-S dot com slash AYG. Code AYG at checkout. Do it.

• 43:40Speaker 02

  I love, I genuinely love a flea market. I don't like the flea markets that are pretty much just like bad garage sales. You know what I mean?

• 43:48H. Foley?

  I like those.

• 43:49Speaker 02

  I like them, but there's never anything real, like in theory, I like the hunt of like, oh, I could go there. I actually stopped to look for stuff for like tooties, like, oh, we can find a cool fucking something like that would be really cool on set. And, uh, I stopped and I mean, it's just like, it's, it's rough. It's real rough. It's like, they got like oxygen tanks and they're sitting there catching heaters. No, they're on them.

• 44:13H. Foley?

  I was gonna say, pick up a tank for the boys.

• 44:16Speaker 02

  Fucking talking about clean living. Uh, yeah, it's just never anything and it's like, you always see the same, like this box of whatever this got this packaged. If they do have packaged goods of some kind, it's been in and out of a trunk and a box 50,000 times and it's just like broken and ripped and whatever. And it's like, it's just never shit you'll want. I love one that's like, hey, there's one on the Upper West Side that I've, that I've, we bounce around to.

• 44:42H. Foley?

  The one in the, in the school.

• 44:44Speaker 02

  Yeah, that's a nice one.

• 44:45H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 44:46Speaker 02

  But they got like, hey, I'm a, I make furniture. I make coffee tables. I make cutting boards. I make these. I make that.

• 44:51H. Foley?

  Get a lot of pickles at those things.

• 44:52Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 44:53H. Foley?

  Good pickle stands.

• 44:53Speaker 02

  You got good, good specialty food stands. Love all of that shit. I just don't like the, and I do love a garage sale. I do love, we, like I, I said, I would grow up, we would go trash picking, looking for, I like the search. I like the hunt.

• 45:06H. Foley?

  Gotcha.

• 45:07Speaker 02

  But they're just anymore. It's like just old musty shit that, that lives in their trunk and then they go to the next one on Tuesday, then the next one on Wednesday. It's just not, not my cup of tea.

• 45:17H. Foley?

  You jogged a memory of, uh, could be a good, are you garbage question? Growing up, did any of your family members, was there an oxygen tank in the house?

• 45:24Speaker 02

  Sure. I don't think so.

• 45:26H. Foley?

  My Aunt Mary had one. She was young too. I don't ever saw her use it. But Darrell was like, don't smoke around that getaway. Don't play with that.

• 45:34Speaker 02

  Uh huh.

• 45:35H. Foley?

  I didn't realize that that would blow up.

• 45:37Speaker 02

  Yeah. I mean, I think if you're like,

• 45:39H. Foley?

  Pure oxygen will go up.

• 45:41Speaker 02

  Sure. I don't know. I know, I never, uh...

• 45:44H. Foley?

  Thought he got the Challenger, I think.

• 45:46Speaker 02

  But I don't think...

• 45:46H. Foley?

  Somebody.

• 45:48Speaker 02

  I don't think that. I don't think the astronauts were on oxygen in that tank.

• 45:50H. Foley?

  I think there was oxygen. That didn't help the situation.

• 45:53Speaker 02

  Sure. Um, alright, let's see. This one's from Beardo. "Is it trashy when you're out at a restaurant and you use the condensation from your drink to get any foreign substance off your hands, such as anything sticky?" That's a pro move.

• 46:07H. Foley?

  Pro move.

• 46:07Speaker 02

  Pro move. If you're jammed up, you wet it, then you hit the paper towel, maybe hit it again. I'm not opposed to an ice cube snack. It's not classy, but if you're jammed up...

• 46:16H. Foley?

  Cold glass, cocktail napkin, and a wedge of lemon, it's like taking a shower.

• 46:21Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 46:22H. Foley?

  Fucking get all in there.

• 46:23Speaker 02

  Also isn't bad if you're at a bar, you know, you're at a bar and they hit you with the fucking... You order like a draft beer, they hit you with the bar napkin.

• 46:31H. Foley?

  Mm-hmm.

• 46:32Speaker 02

  Put that on there. Maybe a little overflow, it'll drip. Just that moisture on there. That'll get you going. That'll get you where you need to go.

• 46:38H. Foley?

  Brush your teeth with that, dude.

• 46:41Speaker 02

  Dude, a pits and a grundle. Keep it moving, daddy-o.

• 46:45H. Foley?

  It's a Mando before Mando.

• 46:47Speaker 02

  Uh-huh. Um, alright, speaking of parents' houses, this is from Hulk. "Is it garbage to stop at your parents' house just to get food from their fridge to eat at your own house?"

• 46:58H. Foley?

  That's a big thing now. Kids do that. College kids do that.

• 47:02Speaker 02

  College is different. I did it in college, for sure, but I would understand if it's like leftover, hey, she's got her, some sort of leftover there, you know what I mean? But like, I mean, if you're popping by and eating like a bag of chips or something.

• 47:18H. Foley?

  I took home three slices of frozen pizza from parents'.

• 47:22Speaker 02

  What were the slices, by the way?

• 47:25H. Foley?

  It's a good question. Was Franzones?

• 47:27Speaker 02

  First of all, they were whole pies.

• 47:29H. Foley?

  It was Franzones. It was a Franzone. Shout out to Franzones in Conchahocken if you're looking for good pizza. Sweet pie, delicious. Get the onions on it, balance everything out. It's unbelievable. It was, uh, they were all slices of Franzones with onions. Yeah.

• 47:44H. Foley?

  Thin slices. Like a half.

• 47:46Speaker 02

  Sure.

• 47:47H. Foley?

  It's almost cauliflower pie, if you're really thinking about it.

• 47:50Speaker 02

  That's what I have. This is like a salad. There's vegetables involved.

• 47:53H. Foley?

  Yeah, I took them home with me. But I did it for the pizza.

• 47:57Speaker 02

  What?

• 47:58H. Foley?

  It's shit. Locked in. You don't freeze pizza, man.

• 48:00Speaker 02

  You're trying to free the pizza?

• 48:02H. Foley?

  Freeing the pizza. Get you guys a good home.

• 48:07H. Foley?

  Like Dodo.

• 48:09H. Foley?

  Fucking Instagram page goes around, picks up the stray dogs.

• 48:13Speaker 02

  Uh, I mean, you are genuinely something else.

• 48:18H. Foley?

  I'll tell you this.

• 48:20H. Foley?

  If you do freeze the pizza, you gotta eat it that night. Because by the time I got it home, put it in the fridge, next day.

• 48:27Speaker 02

  Oh, you can't do that. No. That starts getting, that turns into, you got spores on there.

• 48:33H. Foley?

  It's like Ridley Scott directed it, fucking Alien. Fucking onions were moving. No bueno.

• 48:41Speaker 02

  Someone's looking back at you. Hey, buddy. Uh, alright, this is from OTA. "Is it garbage to think you can beat anyone up because you quote unquote see red?"

• 48:53Speaker 02

  That's a big dirtbag move. I don't know, man. I just see red.

• 48:58H. Foley?

  Sure.

• 48:59Speaker 02

  That and like, I gotta have, that was like in high school or college, like, you know. I get fucked, I have four shots and I'm, you know, it was like, I gotta be drunk to fight type thing.

• 49:10H. Foley?

  Sure.

• 49:11Speaker 02

  That was always a dirt, I was always a kid about to get his ass kicked.

• 49:14H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 49:14Speaker 02

  Never really.

• 49:16H. Foley?

  I never looked at it like that. I never thought I could win, but.

• 49:20Speaker 02

  No.

• 49:21H. Foley?

  I was gonna fight ya. Does that make sense?

• 49:24Speaker 02

  There's frozen pizza on the line.

• 49:26H. Foley?

  I'll get my ass kicked. I would never say, "I'll beat your fucking ass."

• 49:30Speaker 02

  I've yelled that a couple of times.

• 49:31H. Foley?

  I would just say, "I'll fight ya." "Beat me up?" He beat me up.

• 49:35Speaker 02

  What did we reverse weiner? What do you want to do here?

• 49:37H. Foley?

  Still already had sex with your girlfriend, so whatever you do to me.

• 49:40Speaker 02

  Pussy.

• 49:42H. Foley?

  Tough break, loser. I already beat you on the bag of blow.

• 49:47Speaker 02

  The fence will be here in any minute.

• 49:48H. Foley?

  I already won.

• 49:51Speaker 02

  Yeah, I think anytime I was in a fight, it was, I was, again, huge lack of confidence, huge.

• 49:56H. Foley?

  You had to be a crier.

• 49:58Speaker 02

  No.

• 49:58H. Foley?

  You afterwards, you weren't a crier.

• 50:01Speaker 02

  Why'd you do that to me? Why'd you make me do that? No. As like a kid, kid? Like a kid.

• 50:07H. Foley?

  You strike me as a guy.

• 50:09Speaker 02

  I'll cry.

• 50:10H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 50:10Speaker 02

  Not, not, not in like a bar fight. I'm not in like old city in Philadelphia at Mad River, throwing drunk haymakers.

• 50:21Speaker 02

  In my, in my bootcut light jeans, flat-toed shoes. Oh, man, big. Um, no, but you saying that kinda shook. I never thought about it, cuz I know, I don't like, I never liked fighting. I would rather never fight than, um...

• 50:40H. Foley?

  Like making sweet love.

• 50:41Speaker 02

  But sometimes when you're, you're early, you're drunk, early in your twenties with idiots, that happens, you know what I mean?

• 50:48H. Foley?

  Sure.

• 50:48Speaker 02

  Tensions are high, people are trying to get laid, that don't happen.

• 50:52H. Foley?

  Hormones, testosterone.

• 50:54Speaker 02

  Yeah. Viagra, Viagra just hit the scene.

• 50:57H. Foley?

  So your best guy kissing another dude, get a little patty?

• 51:01Speaker 02

  I thought we, I thought what we had was serious.

• 51:03H. Foley?

  Son of a bitch.

• 51:04Speaker 02

  I'm swinging on pat.

• 51:07Speaker 02

  You're mine, dude. Um...

• 51:11H. Foley?

  Like Vito and Johnny cakes in the parking lot?

• 51:14Speaker 02

  It was hot. I just never wanted to get beat up. That was my, I didn't wanna win the fight, now that I think I was a very defensive guy.

• 51:22H. Foley?

  Once beat up, like knocked out?

• 51:24Speaker 02

  Why you come over, I'll show ya.

• 51:26H. Foley?

  Cuz these kids today, they fucking knock each other out. Nobody's get, nobody back in our day, even yours, was getting knocked out the way kids are getting knocked out now.

• 51:36Speaker 02

  I just...

• 51:36H. Foley?

  Unless they're just...

• 51:37Speaker 02

  You see it, it's filmed.

• 51:38H. Foley?

  I never saw anybody get knocked out like that.

• 51:41Speaker 02

  I understand, but it's not like, it's just being filmed more, for sure.

• 51:46H. Foley?

  You think?

• 51:46Speaker 02

  Yeah. You were just, if somebody got knocked off, knocked, knocked out in the town next to ya.

• 51:50H. Foley?

  These kids go to the nickel real quick, though.

• 51:52Speaker 02

  Sure, hey, things are a-dacy.

• 51:53H. Foley?

  Christ.

• 51:54Speaker 02

  Did you see, um, that guy playing pickleball that got kicked in the face a couple of weeks ago? Whose side is he on there?

• 52:03H. Foley?

  Um...

• 52:04Speaker 02

  I mean, obviously, you don't kick a guy in the face when he's bending down, that's a tough look, but that guy was screaming.

• 52:10H. Foley?

  That guy's a dork for taking pickleball that serious.

• 52:12Speaker 02

  Smacked the paddle out of the guy's hand.

• 52:14H. Foley?

  Did he, or did he go to high-five the guy?

• 52:18Speaker 02

  I don't know. I checked in the comments on that.

• 52:20H. Foley?

  Because he bent down to pick it up.

• 52:23Speaker 02

  I think he was way too serious in the moment.

• 52:26H. Foley?

  Sure.

• 52:26Speaker 02

  That guy was a little butthurt. He just got fucking spiked on. I get that. He walked over.

• 52:31H. Foley?

  Caught him with a clean John Jones to the face.

• 52:35Speaker 02

  Fucking, yeah. The paddle got knocked out of his hand, and I don't think that was intentionally. I think he was just fucking charged up.

• 52:42H. Foley?

  Mm-hmm.

• 52:43Speaker 02

  But like, you gotta be a little bit of a gentleman. Like, he's screaming, fucking, pretty much screaming right in the guy's face. They're shaking hands and he's still going, "Whoa, let's fucking go!"

• 52:52H. Foley?

  Caught him with a soft kick, too.

• 52:53Speaker 02

  Yeah, that wasn't even a hard one.

• 52:54H. Foley?

  Knocked him out.

• 52:55Speaker 02

  That was a little, yeah. That guy went down like a sack of potatoes.

• 52:59H. Foley?

  Fucking hanging on the net like a fuck, he's hanging in a fucking seafood joint.

• 53:02Speaker 02

  Which I don't condone, but I popped into the comments and everybody was like, "We're all on the, we're all on the side of the guy who kicked him, right?" And I don't think-

• 53:09H. Foley?

  Dude, he slumped him.

• 53:10Speaker 02

  I don't think that's, oh, fuck, dude.

• 53:16H. Foley?

  Was this a, is this a professional thing?

• 53:18Speaker 02

  No. I don't think so. It looks some level.

• 53:21H. Foley?

  This pickleball shit.

• 53:22Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's like-

• 53:23H. Foley?

  Shut up.

• 53:24Speaker 02

  Someone said it didn't count. His foot was in the kitchen.

• 53:29Speaker 02

  Which, I mean, like, you, listen, that is never accept, that's not acceptable. But also, like, you're playing sports, things get passionate, guys are fucking idiots. You start screaming and shit like that in someone's face and it's knocking a paddle out of their hand, like-

• 53:45H. Foley?

  It was disrespectful.

• 53:47Speaker 02

  I'll give you, I could see how what that guy did was viewed as like, "You're being a fucking jerk off to me." And that guy's up, I mean, that's a, that's a cheap shot if I ever see-

• 53:56H. Foley?

  But if you-

• 53:56Speaker 02

  Square up, go knuckle to knuckle.

• 53:58H. Foley?

  I know this is old news, a couple of weeks ago, but i- if you look at it, look at it. He does it, and then he goes to, he goes to pick it up.

• 54:08H. Foley?

  Doesn't he?

• 54:09Speaker 02

  Yeah, I don't know.

• 54:10H. Foley?

  Unless he was gonna drop it again.

• 54:12Speaker 02

  Throw it- Further. What's up pussy? Um, alright, let's see here. Uh, this one is Carter. Are you garbage if your mom got you a Detroit Lions Zippo lighter for your birthday?

• 54:27H. Foley?

  And you're from Atlanta?

• 54:27Speaker 02

  Yeah, I mean, if you're not, I would really hope you're a diehard Detroit Lions fan, but that's, that's like-

• 54:35H. Foley?

  That's a mom that gets it.

• 54:36Speaker 02

  That's a perfectly trashy gift from a parent, I feel. That's like, hey, I know ya. Ya like heaters, you're smoking bowls, you're a Zippo guy, I thought you would like this. I got it at the Exxon gas station.

• 54:49H. Foley?

  There you go.

• 54:50Speaker 02

  I really fucking respect that.

• 54:51H. Foley?

  They were all out of Hess trucks. Fucking grabbed you there.

• 54:53Speaker 02

  You know, you for sure know that's not a name brand Zippo either. That's a Zippo Style lighter.

• 54:57H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 54:58Speaker 02

  First of all, shout out to the Zippo Style lighters.

• 55:00H. Foley?

  Got plenty of them on the website, I believe.

• 55:02Speaker 02

  I think we're all sold out there, big guy. We're gearing up for a new merch drop.

• 55:08H. Foley?

  No kidding.

• 55:08Speaker 02

  Soon. We're getting stuff, we're getting things in line.

• 55:11H. Foley?

  Pickleball?

• 55:12Speaker 02

  Pickleball. We should have that guy's face. We should have that scene. Talk shit, get kicked. Um, alright, let's see here. Uh, this one's from Jagoff Jesse. Great name.

• 55:25H. Foley?

  Love him.

• 55:26Speaker 02

  $10 Tendi basket.

• 55:28H. Foley?

  There you go.

• 55:28Speaker 02

  Woo, new, uh, never had one read. Are you garbage if you're, this one's insane. Are you garbage if for your mom's birthday, the whole family smokes homemade hash and goes to the Chinese buffet together? Cause it's her favorite restaurants and she loves the crab rangoons. I mean dude, there's so many things wrong with that.

• 55:48H. Foley?

  I think the only thing is the homemade hash. I enjoy a nice Chinese buffet.

• 55:53Speaker 02

  I would pull that back one level. I think smoking hash with your family is crazy.

• 55:58H. Foley?

  Crazy.

• 55:58Speaker 02

  Homemade hash with your family is even more bonkers.

• 56:02H. Foley?

  How do you make that?

• 56:03Speaker 02

  I don't know.

• 56:04H. Foley?

  You press your weed?

• 56:05Speaker 02

  Uh, yeah, I don't-

• 56:06H. Foley?

  Is that what you do? You press the weed?

• 56:07Speaker 03

  Yeah, you can do it with a hairdryer.

• 56:10H. Foley?

  Oh my-

• 56:10Speaker 03

  Or a hair straightener, my bad.

• 56:12H. Foley?

  Oh, I've seen that. I know what you're talking about.

• 56:15Speaker 02

  God, I mean-

• 56:17H. Foley?

  Everybody, everybody's bugging out. No one wants to get up and go to the buffet. Freaking out.

• 56:24Speaker 02

  You got a knife to the waiter's neck.

• 56:26H. Foley?

  My only thing with that, to be dead honest with you, is there's no real dessert there. Maybe they have the soft serve machine, but there's no, you can't get, you can't get, you know.

• 56:36Speaker 02

  You think these hash heads are worried about pie?

• 56:39H. Foley?

  I think so, yeah.

• 56:39Speaker 02

  They're up to their neck in crab rangoons.

• 56:42H. Foley?

  Man, that's fucking brutal.

• 56:43Speaker 02

  I mean, you're not going there if you want a good dessert necessarily.

• 56:46H. Foley?

  You drink with your family, what's the difference?

• 56:49Speaker 02

  Yeah, we're not making it in the fucking bathtub. I go to goddamn Anheuser-Busch or Cavett, someone who knows their way around a Pinot Grigio.

• 56:57H. Foley?

  You're freebasing with Denise?

• 56:58Speaker 02

  Yeah, what the fuck?

• 56:59H. Foley?

  You got the pen and the tinfoil?

• 57:01Speaker 02

  Also, I'm by no means a saint. I'm, my family's as a dirtbag as it gets.

• 57:06H. Foley?

  But they don't like Chinese food.

• 57:08Speaker 02

  No, no, they do not.

• 57:12H. Foley?

  At Texas Roadhouse.

• 57:14Speaker 02

  Uh, yeah, I mean, uh, that's, but hey, if it brings your family together, what, look up the...

• 57:23H. Foley?

  Who drove? That's what I want to know.

• 57:25Speaker 02

  Look up the legality of hash now, too, because I don't think that's to criminalize.

• 57:30H. Foley?

  No.

• 57:30Speaker 02

  I don't think you'd be, you know what I mean? That's still a crime at the end of the day.

• 57:34H. Foley?

  Adults age 21 and older can share up to three ounces of cannabis flower and up to 24 grams of concentrated cannabis with other adult age 21 and older for personal use. That don't, that's not, I'm about to say hashish.

• 57:48Speaker 02

  Is that, is hash considered?

• 57:50H. Foley?

  Is it?

• 57:50Speaker 02

  Yeah. Click the next thing down. How much hash can I carry? Eight gram. Damn, you can have eight grams of hash.

• 57:57H. Foley?

  Jesus Christ. Woo, man, that's a big family.

• 58:03Speaker 02

  If everybody has their own eight grams, too?

• 58:05H. Foley?

  No shit.

• 58:07Speaker 02

  Get it lifted, dog.

• 58:08H. Foley?

  Fucking 32 Gs.

• 58:09Speaker 02

  Talk about playing in the mud. Everybody smelling like resin.

• 58:14H. Foley?

  I would assume whatever state that they live in, marijuana is not legal. And I believe that probably the Chinese food is subpar.

• 58:24Speaker 02

  I don't know, though.

• 58:25H. Foley?

  That's got the Dakotas written all over it.

• 58:30H. Foley?

  Man.

• 58:32Speaker 02

  It's probably just a Chinese guy working at a Burger King. They're so high, they think they're at a Chinese buffet.

• 58:36H. Foley?

  Chinese spot in Wyoming must be tough.

• 58:39Speaker 02

  I don't know, though. I don't know. You never know. You never know. Um, but-

• 58:44H. Foley?

  It's no Raymonds, I'll tell you that.

• 58:45Speaker 02

  Woo, shout out to Raymonds in Pacifica, California. One of the greatest restaurants I've ever had. We should say we were all fucking on, we might as well have been on eight grams of hash, is how fucked up we all were. Um-

• 58:59H. Foley?

  I was sitting on the lazy Susan. Spinning around like a new Cadillac.

• 59:06H. Foley?

  That place was unbelievable.

• 59:07Speaker 02

  I think about it many, many nights.

• 59:09H. Foley?

  Uh huh.

• 59:10Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 59:10H. Foley?

  Best hot and sour soup I ever had.

• 59:14H. Foley?

  I wasn't crying, I just- Aim it!

• 59:17Speaker 02

  You're like, made a fight?

• 59:19H. Foley?

  Ah!

• 59:20Speaker 02

  Uh, alright, let's see here. Uh, this is from Drew, $10 hoagie. Uh, is it pronounced pay-per-view or pay-per-view?

• 59:34Speaker 02

  I mean, it took me a long time to realize it wasn't paper view, and I still say pay-per-view.

• 59:39H. Foley?

  Pay-per-view. But you just say it's pay-per-view.

• 59:43Speaker 02

  So really, the, the phonetic sounding is paper. Paper.

• 59:49H. Foley?

  Pay-per-view.

• 59:50Speaker 02

  Pay-per-view.

• 59:50H. Foley?

  Pay-per-view.

• 59:51Speaker 02

  It was pay-per-view. That took me a while to realize that's what it was.

• 59:55H. Foley?

  Sure.

• 59:55Speaker 02

  I thought it was like, I didn't, yeah, I just thought it was pay-per-view.

• 59:58H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 59:59Speaker 02

  Which are coming back.

• 1:00:01H. Foley?

  How?

• 1:00:02Speaker 02

  I mean, all the UFC's all, is all pay-per-view.

• 1:00:05H. Foley?

  What, you get through the cable?

• 1:00:06Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, right? Is it all, yeah.

• 1:00:07H. Foley?

  What if I got YouTube TV?

• 1:00:09Speaker 02

  What?

• 1:00:10H. Foley?

  What if I got YouTube-

• 1:00:11Speaker 02

  I think you have to have ESPN Plus, and then you gotta buy it through ESPN Plus or something like that.

• 1:00:14Speaker 03

  ESPN Plus.

• 1:00:15H. Foley?

  That's who gets it?

• 1:00:16Speaker 03

  Jams you up.

• 1:00:17H. Foley?

  No kidding.

• 1:00:18Speaker 03

  Well, it's all owned by Disney.

• 1:00:19H. Foley?

  No kidding.

• 1:00:20Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:00:22H. Foley?

  And Dana White.

• 1:00:22Speaker 03

  And, he's got his hand there.

• 1:00:25H. Foley?

  Boss man. Cutting checks.

• 1:00:27Speaker 02

  Aye, damn.

• 1:00:28H. Foley?

  He gets heavy at the tables, too.

• 1:00:30Speaker 02

  Sure. Kinda like you.

• 1:00:33H. Foley?

  Heavy everywhere.

• 1:00:34Speaker 02

  Uh, at every table I've ever been at.

• 1:00:36H. Foley?

  Especially at a Chinese buffet.

• 1:00:39Speaker 02

  Uh, let's see. Uh, this one's from Amber Crombie, deep cut. You ever sit in the garage as a family with the door open and watch a thunderstorm?

• 1:00:52Speaker 02

  Uh, never with my family. We did it down the shore with fucking Tommy Pope and Chris O'Connor. That was like a majestic showing of Mother Nature at that point. That we were on the water, the fucking storm was rolling in from like a mile out or whatever. That was something.

• 1:01:09H. Foley?

  Man, that jogs of memories. We were big on thunderstorms.

• 1:01:15Speaker 02

  Really?

• 1:01:15H. Foley?

  Oh, yeah. Sit on the porch.

• 1:01:17Speaker 02

  Hides the yelling.

• 1:01:20H. Foley?

  You don't hear that many dishes breaking.

• 1:01:22Speaker 02

  That was again Shawshank when he was waiting to hit the pipe. You your dad was doing it, waiting for the lightning and then going, "You motherfuckers, I'll kill ya."

• 1:01:31H. Foley?

  Back porch, the sunroom as they call it, the front porch, the door open. Man, when that pressure would change and the barometer would drop and you would smell that ozone coming through the screen door. Woo wee, the angels are bowling the night, Pop.

• 1:01:48Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:01:48H. Foley?

  Sit there and watch the storm.

• 1:01:50Speaker 02

  He's having flashbacks.

• 1:01:51H. Foley?

  That would happen once in a while. Yeah.

• 1:01:55Speaker 02

  Uh.

• 1:01:55H. Foley?

  Loved it.

• 1:01:56Speaker 02

  Yeah, I don't think we ever did it. I remember being in some cars, real nervous and they're always like the safest from the lightning. And they'd be like, you know, meanwhile, whoever's driving is probably fucking half cocked on the way home from a family party.

• 1:02:08H. Foley?

  Is that true about being in the car?

• 1:02:10Speaker 02

  I think they say, they go, "That's the safest place to be because the rubber's grounded." That's what my, that's what the drunk adults in my life would tell me. I don't know, though.

• 1:02:18H. Foley?

  Yeah, cuz I've seen some videos.

• 1:02:21Speaker 02

  If you're caught in a storm while driving, you're safest in an enclosed metal, metal vehicle. This means the hardtop cars with all the windows shut. If the car is struck by lightning, the camera will flow through the metal body of the vehicle.

• 1:02:33H. Foley?

  You'll feel a little bit. You'll get a little buzz.

• 1:02:36Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:02:37H. Foley?

  Like one of them vibrating panties or something.

• 1:02:39Speaker 02

  Man, those videos.

• 1:02:44Speaker 02

  Talk about going to a Chinese buffet. How you doing?

• 1:02:46H. Foley?

  I'm gonna get one of those for Luke.

• 1:02:49Speaker 02

  We should do an episode like that. Put a butt plug in Luke. And just buzz him. Oh, hey.

• 1:02:58H. Foley?

  Oh, AYG after dark.

• 1:03:00Speaker 02

  Or we should do it, we should do it for both of us. We each control it. We're just coming to me, just screaming. Ah!

• 1:03:07H. Foley?

  I pull out the fob right now, just running full blast.

• 1:03:11Speaker 02

  I didn't know you guys were down to party.

• 1:03:16Speaker 02

  Ah, fuck me dude.

• 1:03:20H. Foley?

  Yeah, we loved watching anything like that.

• 1:03:23Speaker 02

  Mm-hmm. Um.

• 1:03:25H. Foley?

  Lightning storms, accident scenes, house fire. Yeah, we were out there.

• 1:03:32Speaker 02

  Yeah, we never really...

• 1:03:34H. Foley?

  Maybe the news van drives by, everyone freak out.

• 1:03:38Speaker 02

  Ah, we were never really around as a family. We're never like really a tight unit like that.

• 1:03:43H. Foley?

  I mean dude, you think about it as a dad, that's a cheap night. Sitting and watch the fucking thunderstorm. Maybe it hits a telephone pole. It's like the finale of a fireworks show. Ooh.

• 1:03:54Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 1:03:55H. Foley?

  You ever have that? You ever have, you ever have the, the telephone pole outside your house get struck by lightning?

• 1:04:00Speaker 02

  I had it even worse. In a very bad rainstorm, I was a young man, uh, driving late at night.

• 1:04:07H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 1:04:08Speaker 02

  Put it that way, with a friend of mine.

• 1:04:10H. Foley?

  Okay.

• 1:04:11Speaker 02

  Couldn't see shit. I was in my first loom, was driving him, dropping him off, pouring rain, so I'm driving real slow. We drive by like, there's like a hut in the woods, like right off the side of the road, like a transformer house or whatever. You know what I mean?

• 1:04:25H. Foley?

  Oh, I know what you're talking about.

• 1:04:27Speaker 02

  Man, that got hit and the whole fucking world went neon white and blue. And I, I, I hit the brakes.

• 1:04:37H. Foley?

  Could have been the hash.

• 1:04:41H. Foley?

  You were sitting in your living room, buddy.

• 1:04:43Speaker 02

  I gotta plate as a steering wheel. Uh, and I mean, it went, like fucking phenomenon, that movie. You know what I mean?

• 1:04:53H. Foley?

  The, the...

• 1:04:54Speaker 02

  Or powder, whatever one hit.

• 1:04:55H. Foley?

  The John Travolta vehicle?

• 1:04:56Speaker 02

  Yeah. Didn't he get struck by lightning and then could be, was like a genius?

• 1:05:00H. Foley?

  Yeah, for a minute.

• 1:05:01Speaker 02

  That's what happened to me.

• 1:05:02H. Foley?

  And brain cancer.

• 1:05:03Speaker 02

  That's why my head's so big.

• 1:05:06Speaker 02

  Yeah, phenomenon. Something like that. I don't know.

• 1:05:10H. Foley?

  That's what you saw?

• 1:05:12Speaker 02

  I was pretty fucked up if we're being honest with you. No, what was-

• 1:05:16H. Foley?

  I was looking at pictures of a volcano.

• 1:05:17Speaker 02

  What was Powder?

• 1:05:19H. Foley?

  He was just a weird kid.

• 1:05:21Speaker 02

  No, he got struck by lightning too.

• 1:05:22H. Foley?

  Did he?

• 1:05:23Speaker 02

  Oh, man, that was me.

• 1:05:25H. Foley?

  Uh-uh.

• 1:05:25Speaker 02

  I never realized how freaky that kid is. He looks like he should be in fucking, uh, uh, what's that heathen ass movie that Tom Hanks did?

• 1:05:35H. Foley?

  Heathen ass movie?

• 1:05:36Speaker 02

  Power of the Dollar? No, Power, uh, Angels and Demons?

• 1:05:40Speaker 03

  Yeah, the, uh, second Da Vinci Code?

• 1:05:42H. Foley?

  Oh, I know what you're talking about, with, uh-

• 1:05:44Speaker 02

  One of those monks running around?

• 1:05:45H. Foley?

  With, uh, the guy that plays, uh, Vision, that was hitting himself with the, with the belt. Yeah, I wouldn't want that guy looking for me.

• 1:05:53Speaker 02

  Um-

• 1:05:53H. Foley?

  Powder, still, he got ass in high school though. Look, he's making out with that broad right there. He was dating somebody in that movie.

• 1:05:58Speaker 02

  He brainwashed her to convince her to do it.

• 1:06:01H. Foley?

  Is that Katie Holmes, or, uh, who's that? No.

• 1:06:05Speaker 02

  No.

• 1:06:06H. Foley?

  She's too young.

• 1:06:06Speaker 02

  Um, but, uh, yeah, and we were like, I, we, we looked at each other and like, are we dead, like, is that, was that it? Are we, are we in the big lumina in the sky right now? It was fucking, man. Woo doggy. That one, that was-

• 1:06:22H. Foley?

  St. Michael's in the backseat?

• 1:06:23Speaker 02

  That was a quiet ride home.

• 1:06:25H. Foley?

  Sure.

• 1:06:26Speaker 02

  We just turned around and went back to where we were coming from. We're like, I thought we faced the devil tonight, dude.

• 1:06:31H. Foley?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:31Speaker 02

  And then, I don't know. Had the right hand and was able to walk away.

• 1:06:34H. Foley?

  We were, my parents were driving me to the train station one time with, uh, with an old girlfriend in the car, and we, it was on 73.

• 1:06:43Speaker 02

  Skip back pike.

• 1:06:46H. Foley?

  Excuse me, and some car had gotten hit by downed power lines. Was over the other person's car, and like a piece of a tree, the branches were on top of it.

• 1:06:58Speaker 02

  Nope.

• 1:06:58H. Foley?

  And I went to hop out, and my dad freaked the fuck out. I got a fucking-

• 1:07:04Speaker 02

  That's a hot wire.

• 1:07:05H. Foley?

  Yeah, hot wire.

• 1:07:06Speaker 02

  Uh-huh.

• 1:07:07H. Foley?

  She'd be, shh, done.

• 1:07:08Speaker 02

  Fried.

• 1:07:09H. Foley?

  Soon as you put your hand on the door, "I got you ma'am!" Fucking out.

• 1:07:13Speaker 02

  Don't cook a bacon.

• 1:07:18Speaker 02

  Uh, alright, we gotta wrap it up, gang.

• 1:07:20H. Foley?

  What a fun one.

• 1:07:21Speaker 02

  Yes sir.

• 1:07:21H. Foley?

  Gang, Kippy?

• 1:07:23Speaker 02

  We love yous.

• 1:07:24H. Foley?

  Luke? Love you guys, so see you next week. Peace.