How Successful People Fulfill Their Full Potential

Defeat FEAR and find the courage to step away from the crowd and INTO your own uniqueness! In this episode, I’m teaching you how to cultivate a mindset geared for personal greatness and the strategies to make it a reality. Mahatma Gandhi once said, “To believe in something, and not to live it, is dishonest.” This powerful statement echoes throughout this episode as we explore how living your truth is not just a path to personal fulfillment but also a commitment to integrity. It’s about making your actions reflect your deepest beliefs and values. Here’s what you’ll learn: The importance of choosing to be different and why setting yourself apart is crucial in achieving true success and fulfillment Overcoming the fear of criticism and how to stay true to your path, despite external pressures Practical steps for breaking conformity Understand how to see challenges not as obstacles but as opportunities to grow stronger and more capable Get equipped with methods to maintain your course towards personal excellence, even when it’s tempting to revert to comfort This episode will empower you to redefine success on your own terms. We'll discuss how to set and pursue goals that resonate with your personal vision, not just societal expectations. Learn how to craft a life that feels rich and rewarding, filled with passion and purpose. We’ll delve into the psychology of self-actualization and how to keep pushing the boundaries of what you can achieve. Transform your life by living with intention and conviction and chart a course that’s uniquely yours. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Ed Mylett?

  So hey guys, are you frustrated with where you're at right now? Maybe stunted in your progress? Well, if you are, I want to recommend a place for you to go called Growth Day. GrowthDay.com/Ed. It is the number one personal development app on the planet. It's got all kinds of high-performance techniques in there. Courses, accountability, journaling, live speeches from some of the top influencers in the world, including me. It's an overall environment to change your life. GrowthDay.com/Ed. I hear so many small business owners say the exact same thing. They just never have enough time in the day. Well, I measure time differently. I've compressed, condensed, heck, I've bent time. My first day is 6:00 AM to noon. My second day starts at noon and goes till 6:00 PM.

• 0:43Ed Mylett?

  And my third day, 6:00 PM to midnight. I now get 21 days a week. Stack that up over a month, over a year, over five years, and my life's completely different than it would have been otherwise. And if you want to win as an entrepreneur, you have to compress your time too. And you definitely can't afford to waste it waiting weeks on a big bank for capital. Your best bet's to work with my friends at Cardiff. They know how to compress time for entrepreneurs. They get your business approved in minutes and funded the very same day. They're America's favorite small business lender, and for good reason. Over 20 years in business, over 12 billion deployed to small business across America. Stop letting bank delays slow down your momentum. Head to cardiff.co/Ed. That's cardiff.co/Ed. Cardiff.co. Real growth, fast funding.

• 1:28Ed Mylett?

  Cardiff, borrow better.

• 1:35Speaker 01

  This is the Ed Meyer Show.

• 1:39Ed Mylett?

  Welcome back to the show, everybody. I am so excited about today's topic. I've wanted to record this episode for about a week now. I'm finally getting a chance in the studio to do it with you. What we're going to talk about today is actually, what do you need to do to fulfill your dreams and your potential? And I want to start out by saying something to you. You're going to have to decide in your life that you're going to be different, that you're not going to be like everybody else, that you're not going to be a part of the crowd. Everything in our culture today is trying to make us all the same, put us all in the same box, take what I call the crowded road of life as opposed to the lonely road of life, the road less traveled. And I've done a show on that before, and people asked me if I would go deeper on it, so I will today. And so today, we're going to talk a lot about the mindset. That's required to do something great.

• 2:23Ed Mylett?

  And the first decision is to accept the fact that you're going to be different. You're going to be criticized. You're going to have haters. But not only that, you're going to feel very alone oftentimes on the journey. And you're not going to feel like a lot of people understand you. And it's making a decision upfront that I'm okay with not being like everyone else. I'm okay with not being part of the pack. That I want to be different. I want to stand out. You know, it's a difficult decision to do that, especially when maybe you don't have the confidence yet to do it. But at the end of your life, you're going to regret the fact that you didn't go for it. That you didn't try to do something different and unique and follow your heart, follow your own path.

• 3:03Ed Mylett?

  If you're a person of faith, we know that each of us was made individually in God's image and likeness, whatever your faith might be. And that there's an individual plan for our life. And so if there's an individual plan, an individual destiny for our lives, why would we try to take pages out of everybody else's book? Let me say something to you upfront, okay? Conformity to me is the ultimate form of cowardice. Let me say it again. Conformity is the ultimate form of cowardice. Meaning when you just decide to conform to what everybody else expects of you, what everybody else is doing, or what they think you are, what they think you should be doing, or their limiting beliefs about you, their small minds.

• 3:45Ed Mylett?

  See, small-minded people, God bless them, will constantly try to project their smallness onto you to get you to shrink. And then what happens is most people end up being a coward in life. It's what it really is, where they just begin to conform. I'm going to do and say what you think I should do and say. I'm not going to speak my mind. I'm not going to stand up for what I believe in. I'm not going to try something outside of the box because I might fail and then you'll criticize me. And even when I'm trying, you'll probably criticize me. And even if I win and succeed, you're probably going to criticize me. You ought to just decide right now and understand something, okay? Let me say this to you. You're going to get criticized the whole time. You're going to get criticized when you try.

• 4:30Ed Mylett?

  You're going to get criticized if you fail. And believe it or not, you're going to get criticized when you win. Because what people that are losing in their life do is they criticize people. And the reason they're critical of other people is it's the only time in their life that they feel like they have any power or any value. That they're even noticed. So because they're in a pack and they've conformed and they're on the crowded road, they don't ever stand out. They don't ever get noticed. And so if you're never gonna do that and you're being a coward, which is to be like everybody else, well, what's the one way out of that cowardice is to be a bully, is to be a critic, is to sit on the sidelines and poke fun, or tell people how they ought to do it better when they're not doing anything. And you've just got to decide in your life. I know I'm being a little bit more intense than

• 5:13Ed Mylett?

  normal today. You gotta decide in your life that you don't want to take advice from these people. You don't want to think like these people. And by the way, many of them are really great people. Just at one time, they just decided, you know what, I'm just gonna color between the lines in my life. I'm just gonna color right in between the lines like everybody else, which I'm gonna talk about in a minute.

• 5:34Ed Mylett?

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• 6:15Ed Mylett?

  and you should too. Go to ro.co/milet to see if you qualify. That's R-O dot C-O slash mylet to get started on Ro. For side effects of GLP-1 medications, including boxed warning, go to ro.co/safety. ro.co/safety. So when I ended up buying the island, we had to do all of our outdoor decorating, and I spent a fortune in the first half of the place. And I'm like, I don't want to do this anymore, but I want the best stuff. And that's where Wayfair came in. My wife wanted to get this new garden bed, and Wayfair was the place that offered the perfect solution. Wayfair also helps you create a home that stands up to real life with quality products, great value, and trusted reviews. Wayfair verified products are hand vetted by Product specialists use a 10-point quality inspection system.

• 6:59Ed Mylett?

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• 7:34Speaker 02

  Wayfair, every style, every home.

• 7:38Ed Mylett?

  And so what ends up happening, Gandhi has this great quote that I've been really working on lately. Gandhi said, "I will not let you walk through my mind with your dirty feet." And too many of you are letting the people around you walk through your mind with their dirty feet. And it's polluting your brain. It's polluting your thoughts. It's creating negative belief systems, limiting belief systems. And you know what? Your own confidence, your own strength, your own self-esteem is going to come from you. You have to understand something. When you try something in your life, okay? Or you attempt anything in your life, you're either going to become wise or you're going to become wounded. And too many people, once they start to try, become wounded.

• 8:22Ed Mylett?

  The failure wounds them. The setback wounds them. The criticism wounds them. Their own, by the way, sometimes the people walking through your mind with their dirty feet are you and your own thoughts. And by the way, the reason I know this is I very much have done this myself. The guy walking through my mind most of the time with his dirty feet is this dude right here. And I've learned something. I don't have to believe everything I think. In fact, I don't anymore. Most of the stuff I think, all the studies say, I've said this in another podcast, 80 to 90% of our thoughts are negative. These aren't my thoughts. Those aren't God's thoughts. Those are somehow very, very wounded man's thinking, not a wise man. And I'll ask myself that when I have these thoughts. Is this a wise man's thoughts or a wounded man's thoughts?

• 9:07Ed Mylett?

  You ask yourself that. These negative thoughts that you're having, these limiting thoughts that you're having. Is that the wise woman's thoughts or the wounded woman's thoughts? And if it's the wounded woman, stop listening to her and start talking to her. Sometimes in life, you gotta stop listening to yourself so much and start talking to yourself. And it's all your responsibility. Listen, it's not called friend esteem, or stranger esteem, or mom and dad esteem. It's called self-esteem for a reason, because you have to be the one to believe it. And listen to me, the fact that you're listening to my podcast or watching it means this, you're starting to grow, and maybe you've been growing for quite a while. And by the way, if you're outgrowing people, it makes them very uncomfortable with themselves.

• 9:49Ed Mylett?

  And then, because they're uncomfortable with themselves, they become dream stealers. Because here's what happens, you getting bigger makes them feel smaller. And so the consequence, what a lot of us do, is we decide to shrink ourselves and get smaller, so that they can feel bigger or safer with us around. Let me say that to you again. You getting bigger makes them feel smaller. And because you're a good person, whether it's your boyfriend or girlfriend, your spouse, your friends, your parents, whoever it is, what you do, because you're a good person, is instead of still getting bigger, you decide you will get smaller so they can feel bigger or safer with you. And what ends up happening is, you shrink your dreams. And we shrink our lives, we shrink our energy, we shrink our capacity to fit in.

• 10:36Ed Mylett?

  And we make all these other people around us comfortable. And what I want you to do is, I want you to make some people uncomfortable in your life. There's nothing wrong with making people feel uncomfortable. And if you're gonna do it, see, to me, that's courage. Courage is being willing to make other people uncomfortable. Remember this, sometimes I had to say this to my family, pardon my progress, but I'm gonna be making progress over here, right? And eventually, they might get on board, and they might not get on board. But I want to know that at the end of my life, when it's over, That I've given it everything I've got. That I didn't shrink myself because I was a coward. I didn't shrink myself to please small minded people around me.

• 11:19Ed Mylett?

  That my capacity to grow, my capacity to read, my, my total commitment to a personal development program. My total commitment to a self improvement program. I started out as a very young man in my early twenties with absolutely no self esteem, no confidence, no communication ability whatsoever. And I started the journey of self discovery, self improvement and personal development. I started out as a terrible reader, but I found myself, at least I could read a book a month. And then it got to a book a week. And I got up to where I was reading sometimes 50, 60, 70, 80 books a year. And these were like mentors to me. When I read books, it's like this author is personally speaking to me and mentoring me, pouring into me. Man, if there was a podcast like mine back then, my gosh, I'd be glued.

• 12:04Ed Mylett?

  I mean, I would be glued to it. I mean to brag, but like I would be glued to it. There's this great Chinese proverb that says, if you want to know the road ahead, ask those coming back. And to be able to listen to my Thursday episodes or the people I interview on Tuesdays. These are people who have the directions because they're coming back. I think I have some of them. But I know this, when I started out, because I didn't have a lot of confidence. Man, every once in a while, the cowardly me would come back in. I would shrink my life, shrink my dreams, shrink my belief. Right? Those voices were, that those dirty feet were running through my mind. And then a few other people had their dirty feet doing it to me as well. And between the rest of us, between them and me, it was like a stampede in my mind all the time. And I didn't want to make people uncomfortable.

• 12:45Ed Mylett?

  I still, to this day, at 53 years old, I'm a people pleaser. I don't like to offend. I don't like to hurt people. I, if I have strife with somebody in my life, like I can't sleep until I fixed it. I'm just wired that way, many of you are. But I've learned that if I've made a mistake in how I've treated somebody or spoken to them, then it should bother me and I should fix it. But if the mistake I've made is trying to do something great with my life? The mistake I've made is trying to change my family tree forever? The mistake I've made is trying to be happier and grow? If the mistake I've made is trying to give to other people and contribute and create great memories in my life? Then guess what? That's not a mistake and I'm not apologizing for that. I've got one life, you've got one life.

• 13:30Ed Mylett?

  And it's time we have the courage to get after it and take the lonely road and not have this cowardice, this cowardly way about us where we just conform to what everybody else is doing.

• 13:42Ed Mylett?

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• 14:26Ed Mylett?

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• 14:43Ed Mylett?

  And I can tell you, I think I know where it comes from. I think it comes, believe it or not, all the way back when we were little, little kids in our coloring books. Remember how much we were trained over and over again to color between the lines? And I was always a terrible color. I'm left-handed. I just, I've got no coordination skills this way. You go look at my old coloring book, they're just terrible. But we're trained as children, color between the lines, Sarah, color between the lines, Bob, color between the lines, stay between the lines. And we're over and over and over, this is reinforced to us to stay between the lines. And there's a lot of great things about school, but coloring between the lines, sitting in the same way, fold your hand, all these things.

• 15:24Ed Mylett?

  What ends up happening is we begin to get older, we literally start to only color between the lines in our life. We don't want to get outside the lines. And I'm going to say something to you. All great people color outside the lines. All the people you admire, what do you admire about them? They colored outside the lines in their life. They didn't stay a conformist. They didn't stay with some predetermined picture. So here's what a coloring book is. Here's the picture. Now you just fill in the one I gave you. Color between the lines. And that's what most people do in their life. The world hands them, here's your picture. This is what you get. This is your life. This is the one you're handed. Stay between the lines. Don't you veer outside those lines. Don't you get outside of there.

• 16:09Ed Mylett?

  And what happens is that we have this thing that's now wired into us. Once we're adults, oh, my gosh, I'm outside the lines. I better get back. I'm outside the lines. I better get back. And it becomes something in life where I've never been out here before. I need to come back. I'm misbehaving. I'm going to get in trouble. I'm not doing what I was trained to do. This isn't what I do. And I can tell you, that's why there's so few people in life that win. But I can tell you the decision they've made. They've made the decision that they're not coloring within the lines anymore. And so my challenge to you today is to have courage, not cowardice. Is not to conform, but to create. Is to decide in your life that you're not playing within these lines. Somebody else handed to you. That you're going to design your own life with God, your own story, your own pictures.

• 16:54Ed Mylett?

  And that you're going to pick up a new pen, a new crayon. You're going to start coloring a whole new picture of your life. And when you begin to do that, it's going to be uncomfortable at first. And by the way, some of you have said, Ed, I've done it. And you know what? Now that I'm listening today, I'm back between the dang lines again. I was outside. I had some failures and setbacks and I ran back within the picture they gave me. You've got to stop this tendency of running back within the picture that everybody gave you. Shrinking your dreams down, shrinking your life down to fit between these lines. Some artificial lines that everybody, some strange, a random person, I guess, gave you. But I can tell you this. I don't believe you were created to stay within those lines. I don't think you yet have any idea what your potential is and your capacity.

• 17:37Ed Mylett?

  But what I can tell you is you begin to expand your capacity and you start really getting out there. You'll be surprised how far you can go. The people that I know that are successful, myself included, if you think I am. For me to look back now, how far I've come. My gosh, it's amazing. You'd have told me all these different things would happen. It blows my mind. But the reason that that happened is I finally started building a habit of I'm not shrinking to make you comfortable. And by the way, I'm not going to shrink to make me comfortable. I've got incredibly comfortable at being uncomfortable. In fact, this is probably not great to admit, but when I go too long, just kind of laying around, being comfortable, I start to get uncomfortable. I start to get uncomfortable not doing difficult things.

• 18:21Ed Mylett?

  People ask me all the time, why do you do cold plunges in the morning? Is it the anti-inflammatory properties? Is it, ah, no, no, not really. In fact, there's some data that says the longer you do it, the less that has an impact. I don't even know if that's right, but that's why I do it anyway. The reason that I do it is it's hard. The reason I do it is it's difficult. Successful people, happy people do difficult things. Unhappy people, and I believe unsuccessful people have a tendency to not do difficult things. There's this great story, I, my firm at one time, we sponsored Carl Edwards. He was a NASCAR driver, very successful one for a long time.

• 19:04Ed Mylett?

  And I asked him about driving a NASCAR and I'll never forget what he told me. I said, what's the hardest part? And he goes, well, there's obviously the physical toll that it takes on your head and, and obviously the mechanics of knowing how to drive the car correctly and all those things that I don't understand of being a top athlete in any sport. But he said, the most difficult part is when you're driving and there's a crash in front of you and you're doing 150 miles an hour and all you can see is a smoke cloud. All you can see is a smoke cloud. And he said, and what you gotta do is drive right through that cloud. You gotta drive right through it. And he goes, and it's scary because you don't know what's on the other side. You could be going headlong into a car that's already crashed at 150, 180 miles an hour, bam, and you don't know, and you gotta drive through the smoke anyway.

• 19:48Ed Mylett?

  I never thought about that before. He goes, oh yeah, I mean, there's a wreck in front of you and there's ever, the smokes everywhere. He goes, you just gotta drive right through it. And he said, the other thing is when there's an accident, he goes, you know, you're up against the wall and you're driving. He goes, your tendency when you're driving, you gotta, you're doing 150 or 180 or whatever they do, the wall's a millimeter away. He goes, you can't look at the wall. Because when you look at it, you drive right into it. You end up gravitating right into it. He said, you gotta keep looking ahead, Ed. You can't flinch when there's an accident in front of you. You can't flinch where there's smoke and you can't see what's on the other side. You gotta drive right through it. And I remember it firing me up thinking, man, that's life. Man, that's success. Sometimes you can't see where you're going. You gotta drive right through it, not knowing what's on the other side. And have the faith and the confidence that when you get to the other side,

• 20:33Ed Mylett?

  you will figure it out, that there'll be a blessing and a gift, that you'll be protected. And that's what I mean by the conformity is cowardice. Right? It takes courage to go through that smoke cloud. And then you gotta keep your eye on the prize. When you're driving 150, 180 miles an hour, an inch away from the wall, don't look at the wall. Don't look at the wall. Look ahead where you're going. And so many of us in life, even once we get it going, we start looking at the wall. I know I'm gonna crash. I know I'm gonna crash. It's so close. And we start looking at the things we don't want and we manifest them. We literally, I believe thoughts are magnets. And what you think about most regularly, you attract to yourself. I believe that. I believe it, especially if you do it repetitively. Especially if I can be candid with you, and I may sound outside the lines for you,

• 21:17Ed Mylett?

  but let me just say this, I love being outside the lines. The more you begin to become successful and vibrate at a high frequency, the more you really need to protect your thoughts. Because when you're vibrating the highest frequency, you tend to draw things to you even more rapidly and more regularly when you're at that frequency. Okay? And so it's important that you not look at the wall in your life. That wall is an artificial line in the coloring book of your life. And when you begin to look at it, you decide to conform or hit it. But when you look ahead at where you're going, when you're focused in the present moment. See, I could tell you this. The other reason I love to cold plunge is it's so dad gum cold. It forces me to be fully present in that moment.

• 22:00Ed Mylett?

  You get into a cold plunge, you can't be worrying about your problems in that moment. You are fully focused on getting through those three to five minutes or however long you sit in there. For some of us that are crazy people, it's some of the few minutes every day we are fully present. Right? And I can promise you, if you're doing 150 or 180 into a smoke cloud, you're not worried about your grocery list at that time. You're going right in there, fully present in the moment. And it's the most alive you ever feel in your life. See, total focus, you'll feel the most alive in your life. If you look back at your life, some of the most chaotic, busy, difficult times. Where you're happiest and you may not have realized it at the time. But when you're in college cramming for finals and I ask you to go back to those days, all the stress. You had a job and you're going through college, let's say if you had that. Some of the happiest times in your life.

• 22:44Ed Mylett?

  Some of you mamas, those days where your eight month, your pregnancy and you're. Is it one of the difficult times in your life, yet one of the most blessed times in our life? See, when it's really busy and we feel the most out of control and we're driving through that smoke cloud. We're coloring outside those lines when we're the happiest. And when it's easy and cruise control and we're just kind of shrinking our life down to conform like everybody else. It's when we're the most miserable. That's why there's this thing that's inside of you right now, saying, I'm supposed to be somebody. I'm supposed to do something great with my life. I'm not exactly settled where I am right now. You're not settled right now, you don't feel settled in your spirit. You don't feel settled in your spirit because you know there's more abundant faith for you. You know, there's more people to help.

• 23:29Ed Mylett?

  You know, there's a dream and a life waiting for you out there, even if you're in a great one right now. You've got this sense about you that there's another place for you to go. There's more people for you to help, there's more people for you to serve. If you're a believer that you want to serve God's kingdom in the biggest possible way you can. Whatever that thing is for you. And I can tell you, I know where that lies and that lies outside the lines. And so today I hope you decide that you or no one else is ever going to walk through your mind with their dirty feet. And that you've decided that you're not going to conform. And that you're going to do something awesome with your life. I'm giving you full permission. In fact, I'm begging you. Color outside the lines because that's where all the people that you want to help are waiting for you. All right, everybody. God bless you. Max out your life.