#2296 - Big Jay Oakerson

Big Jay Oakerson is a stand-up comedian, podcaster, and on-air personality. He co-hosts "The Legion of Skanks," "Story Warz," and "The Bonfire." The first installment of his new crowd work special, "Them," is now available on YouTube. The second part, "They," premieres April 20. www.bigjaycomedy.com https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T12MMZ69Z2Y Visit blackriflecoffee.com/joe-rogan and use code ROGAN for 30% Off Don’t miss out on all the action - Download the DraftKings app today! Sign-up using dkng.co/rogan or with my promo code ROGAN. GAMBLING PROBLEM? CALL 1-800-GAMBLER, (800) 327-5050 or visit gamblinghelplinema.org (MA). Call 877-8-HOPENY/text HOPENY (467369) (NY). Please Gamble Responsibly. 888-789-7777/visit ccpg.org (CT), or visit www.mdgamblinghelp.org (MD). 21+ and present in most states. (18+ DC/KY/NH/WY). Void in ONT/OR/NH. Eligibility restrictions apply. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino & Resort (KS). 1 per new customer. $5+ first-time bet req. Max. $200 issued as non-withdrawable Bonus Bets that expire in 7 days (168 hours). Stake removed from payout. Terms: dkng.co/dk-offer-terms. Ends 3/30/25 at 11:59 PM ET. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:01Speaker 00

  The Joe Rogan Experience.

• 0:17Speaker 01

  Yeah, buddy.

• 0:17Joe Rogan?

  What's happening?

• 0:18Speaker 01

  Hell, yeah.

• 0:19Joe Rogan?

  You went with the three nose rings now. You're getting crazy.

• 0:21Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's getting carried away. I went to go, I had a cold and I think I blew my nose, one of them out. So then I went to go get it re-put back in and I was like, throw another one in there while you're at it.

• 0:31Joe Rogan?

  Fuck it.

• 0:32Speaker 01

  I'm me fighting age, I think.

• 0:34Joe Rogan?

  Is that what it is?

• 0:35Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 0:35Joe Rogan?

  There's something weird when you're fighting age. Like, you know you're doing it, but you can't help it.

• 0:40Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, absolutely. Like, when people make fun of me, just the way I dress or whatever, color of my hair, my piercings. And they always like, is it gonna change at some point? And I am hitting an age where I'm like, I can't just do a hard shift one day. But it is funny to think like, I can't see myself at 65.

• 0:57Joe Rogan?

  With painted nails.

• 0:58Speaker 01

  Doing some of the stuff. Yeah, yeah. I don't know.

• 1:01Joe Rogan?

  Why not? Who gives a shit?

• 1:03Speaker 01

  You can, but it's also like, I feel if I saw it, I'd have a million and one jokes about it.

• 1:07Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 1:08Speaker 01

  But it's still, at the end of the day, you're like, you know, I'd walk out, I'd go, oh, I forgot my pocket scarf. I gotta go back upstairs.

• 1:16Joe Rogan?

  As long as you're still funny, you can pull it off. But when you're bombing with red hair and three nose rings.

• 1:23Speaker 01

  Shit, that's true.

• 1:24Joe Rogan?

  It becomes an issue.

• 1:25Speaker 01

  That is true.

• 1:25Joe Rogan?

  As long as you stay funny.

• 1:26Speaker 01

  That's why I think when I first started, I tried to blend in whatever I was. I started in that black circuit, so like, I had so much fubu shit on.

• 1:32Joe Rogan?

  Oh, there you go.

• 1:33Speaker 01

  And just like, yeah, jerseys and stuff, so I definitely played it up. The funniest was having a big silver chain with a cross, and I'm Jewish.

• 1:42Speaker 01

  But it just really was like, I think they'll like me more if I have a cross.

• 1:44Joe Rogan?

  When I first started, I thought you had to dress like those guys on Evening at the Improv, so I got a blazer and I rolled the sleeves up. And I had like a wacky t-shirt that I wore.

• 1:53Speaker 01

  The costume?

• 1:54Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, the costume. Have a button on your blazer, some wacky button.

• 1:58Speaker 01

  I watched all those shows growing up, Evening at the Improv, Caroline's Comedy Hour. The evolution of comedy is insane.

• 2:05Joe Rogan?

  It's pretty insane, yeah.

• 2:06Speaker 01

  The evolution, just like the fact that these guys, I've watched, like, who always laugh and go back, Bill Kerschenbauer, do you know that? That was the guy, he played, he was the coach on a sitcom, he got a sitcom called Just the Ten of Us, where he had like, eight kids. Or something, he was like a coach. It was a spinoff show of some sort, but he was just like a a zany comic. He just would go onstage and he was just loud and weird. And yeah.

• 2:29Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah.

• 2:31Speaker 01

  But these were the guys who made the rounds.

• 2:33Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 2:34Speaker 01

  Uh, monologists.

• 2:36Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. Well, it's almost like their act just got them to a sitcom. Like, that was a real strategy back then. You had an act that could get you to a sitcom. That's all everybody wanted.

• 2:46Speaker 01

  When I did New Faces at Montreal, uh, my manager at the time, terrible, uh, just gave me, I mean, he was just pushing the old advice. He was like, everything was like, don't be yourself at all. Like, write, write a set that's gonna be, what's your sitcom, basically? And, uh, and dress, you know, a certain kind. I would dress like for stage. I don't know what I was, I didn't know how to like, what he meant in nice clothes. So I had like black loafers and straight leg, like dark blue dungarees.

• 3:19Speaker 01

  A short sleeve button down shirt.

• 3:20Joe Rogan?

  I pictured you with black loafers on.

• 3:22Speaker 01

  And, and, and a, and a short sleeve, like, blue button down shirt. It looked ridiculous. And it was so dramatic. It's also funny too, doing it as long as I have now. Twenty seven years, I think I'm doing it. Like, the, the hilarious, like, fake emotion you put into things. I remember having, my daughter was a baby when I did New Faces, and talking to the picture backstage before I went onstage, like, "All right, we're gonna go do it." And then had a mediocre set, and all I got from New Faces was like a MTV Two Talking Head one-off, like, what were they thinking? What were they wearing? MTV Two presents.

• 3:56Joe Rogan?

  You remember those things? Where you would just start talking shit about people?

• 3:59Speaker 01

  That's it.

• 4:00Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, and then they would just clip it up?

• 4:01Speaker 01

  They took, uh, they wouldn't, I did a couple of them. They didn't air most of it. Uh, and the one I always remember, because when I would go back to MTV for anything, they would always be like, "We still passed the..." Like the segment around of you doing that, what were they thinking?

• 4:15Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 4:16Speaker 01

  And it was Fiona Apple on an award show years ago to accept her award. She got there and started quoting, she said, "The great Maya Angelou," or something. And I was like, "Maya Angelou?" I was like, "What is she talking about Maya Angelou for?" I go, "Look, we all loved her as Wheezy Jefferson, and I enjoy her pancake syrup." But, and then they were like, "Yo." "You can't call Maya Angelou Aunt Jemima." I'm like, "But I'm kidding." "But I'm kidding, though. I know what Maya Angelou is."

• 4:41Joe Rogan?

  Wasn't it funny that they took Aunt Jemima off of Aunt Jemima? But that was an actual lady who was an entrepreneur.

• 4:48Speaker 01

  Yeah, and they just could get rid of it because no one's paying attention to why?

• 4:51Joe Rogan?

  No, they just decided that it was racist. They just decided that Aunt Jemima was racist.

• 4:56Speaker 01

  Uncle Ben?

• 4:57Joe Rogan?

  But that's true, right? I mean, this is not a TikTok myth, is it? Make sure that's true. I might have got fooled by TikTok. I should say Reels, because I'm not really on TikTok. Whether or not Aunt Jemima was a real entrepreneur, I'm pretty sure it's true. I think it's based on a real woman. And I think she just was like an awesome cook and put together some fucking pancakes.

• 5:23Speaker 01

  Some great pancakes.

• 5:24Speaker 03

  Yeah, there's a lady, Nancy Green, it says.

• 5:28Joe Rogan?

  Oh, so her name wasn't Jemima?

• 5:29Speaker 03

  Right there.

• 5:30Joe Rogan?

  That's the real lady?

• 5:31Speaker 03

  I mean, this is the first ads, I guess.

• 5:33Speaker 01

  You could tell me that's...

• 5:34Joe Rogan?

  Oh, boy. Hold up, hold up, hold up.

• 5:36Speaker 01

  That looks like racist propaganda.

• 5:38Joe Rogan?

  Look at this. Look at this. Eyes in town, honey. Okay, all arguments are out the window. Eyes in town, honey? Okay, unless you are an actual black person saying that, you can't write that down. Like, you know that was some fucking egghead advertising executive that put that together.

• 6:01Speaker 01

  And then the poor guy, the printing press had to keep double checking. He was like, "Are you sure we're gonna do this?"

• 6:06Joe Rogan?

  "I, apostrophe S?"

• 6:09Speaker 01

  Yes, it's how they speak. Oh, I don't know, man.

• 6:13Joe Rogan?

  Oh, bro.

• 6:15Speaker 01

  I don't want to get involved in this.

• 6:16Joe Rogan?

  Oh.

• 6:17Speaker 01

  Damn, that was a crazy picture. I just, I went to a...

• 6:20Joe Rogan?

  That's so crazy.

• 6:21Speaker 01

  I was looking at an art gallery in Philly recently that had like a Dr. Seuss exhibit at it. And I forgot that Dr. Seuss had all those like crazy racist drawings and stuff.

• 6:30Joe Rogan?

  Right. What were they?

• 6:33Speaker 01

  It was just like, you know, a hunter, like with like a savage with like giant lips and stuff like that.

• 6:39Joe Rogan?

  That's right. You know what's like the most crazy racist shit that caught me off guard was Art Crumb?

• 6:45Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 6:46Joe Rogan?

  You know Art Crumb? The like seventies sort of psychedelic comic book guy? Um, he was very popular when I was a kid living in San Francisco and then when I was an artist. And I was like, I used to love his stuff because I was like, God, this guy's so weird. And then I saw some of the like the super racist ones and you're like, yo! What the fuck?

• 7:07Speaker 01

  It really is the explanation is like, now's a different time.

• 7:13Joe Rogan?

  He had some just weird shit, man. Like he liked riding on giant women. You ever see the documentary they did on him?

• 7:19Speaker 01

  No, but I know what it is. Yeah. I've never seen it.

• 7:21Joe Rogan?

  It's very interesting. It's like, because his brother is super weird and his mother is super weird. And you know, here's this guy like wearing a tie and he's a real pervert and he's like openly a pervert, but like a brilliant artist.

• 7:36Speaker 01

  That's great, yeah.

• 7:37Joe Rogan?

  Really fascinating.

• 7:38Speaker 01

  I've heard of it before. It is amazing though that the stuff, I was, went to a musician, a musician's house for New Year's Eve when I first moved to New York, so twenty some years ago. And he just invited me and Kurt Metzger and we went to his apartment and it was covered in like Sambo paintings.

• 7:57Joe Rogan?

  Oh, jeez.

• 7:59Speaker 01

  There was like black people at the party. It was just like, yeah, it's art. And I'm like, I don't know if I'd cover my house and something I had to explain every one of them to people. I go, no, no, no, no, no.

• 8:10Joe Rogan?

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• 8:54Joe Rogan?

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• 9:38Joe Rogan?

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• 10:18Joe Rogan?

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• 10:55Speaker 01

  See, it's so funny when someone makes strong decisions if they change their ways. I used to drive strippers to bachelor parties to be the bouncer with zero skills to handle that whatsoever. I took the job as like fat kid that wanted to see naked girls for free. And I ended up at a bachelor party with two brothers. It was one of the brothers thing and he was covered in like swastika tattoos and all kinds of crazy shit. And the strippers were not both white, for sure, but there's also black people this party and stuff like that and I don't know the explanation these guys have to give, but I talked to one of their black friends and was like, hey, is it weird to ask, but like, these guys are all covered in like swastika and racist tattoos?

• 11:38Speaker 01

  And they were like, oh yeah, they just got caught up in some bullshit when they were teenagers. They're good dudes. Like, wow. And they're still wearing short sleeve shirts, huh? That seems strange. You think these guys are being like, uh, wearing Terrell Owens body suits like to cover that up?

• 11:51Joe Rogan?

  It's like one of the arguments why you shouldn't be able to get a tattoo until you're 25.

• 11:55Speaker 01

  Is that when the brain's fully formed?

• 11:56Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, when you're a boy, your brains, women mature younger, but when you're a boy, your brain is fully formed at 25, where you're able to make solid decisions.

• 12:04Speaker 01

  What decisions do girls make for tattoos that are that great?

• 12:07Joe Rogan?

  Very few swastikas.

• 12:08Speaker 01

  Very few swastikas.

• 12:09Joe Rogan?

  Like, what are the numbers of swastikas on girls versus on dudes? Like, if we could Google that, please?

• 12:16Joe Rogan?

  What percentage? Like, what percentage?

• 12:18Speaker 01

  I think it's just that one girl, the character that Faruza Balk played in American History X. Did you, I just read a thing recently, this made me laugh so hard. You know this movie, American History X?

• 12:28Joe Rogan?

  Yes, I remember that movie. That movie was crazy.

• 12:30Speaker 01

  Great movie, crazy movie. Ending is such a question mark on it.

• 12:34Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 12:35Speaker 01

  Um, and if you recall, like, you know, he goes to prison, he reforms himself, he comes out, he tries to get his brother out of that mindset of being a white supremacist. And then he succeeds, basically, in telling him the story of what happened to him in jail. And then the next day, he walks his brother to school, his brother gets killed by a black kid, shoots him in the chest, and he dies, and then, uh, he goes in to save him. Or he goes in there and just cries, screaming like, what have I done? You know, his brother's dead now. And then they, they end the movie. The director, who apparently was a lunatic, him and Edward Norton like fought the whole time.

• 13:08Joe Rogan?

  Oh, really?

• 13:09Speaker 01

  Over like how the movie should go, but the director's ending he wanted to do was, uh, after the brother gets shot by the, by the black kid, they were gonna show Edward Norton in the mirror, and then with the big swastika tattoo on him, and then he was gonna smirk in the mirror and walk off. And I was like, they should have played Back in Black after that.

• 13:28Speaker 01

  He's back, and he's racister than ever.

• 13:31Joe Rogan?

  I was almost gonna get it removed. Just imagine being-

• 13:36Speaker 01

  Smiling in a- can you imagine, I'm like a Schwarzenegger movie ending to American History X.

• 13:41Joe Rogan?

  That is so crazy that he wanted to do that.

• 13:44Speaker 01

  I mean, not the song, but that is, they should have played the song, yeah, the image of smirking.

• 13:49Joe Rogan?

  The song would have been, everybody would have been so mad. Can you imagine if you cheesed it up just at the end? Like, you have this brilliant movie and at the end, just total cheeseball, curveball ending.

• 13:59Speaker 01

  Oh, man, I remember taking a date to go see, uh, it was a girl I lost my virginity to, who was a little bit older than me, and very, a very hippy dippy girl, and we went to go see, um, oh, what the fuck?

• 14:14Speaker 01

  Was the movie, it was a John Singleton movie.

• 14:17Joe Rogan?

  Boys in the Hood?

• 14:17Speaker 01

  Fuck, no, no, no, no, it was the one on the school campus. Um, why am I blanking on it? Omar Epps was in it, Tyra Banks was in it, Michael Rappaport was great in it. Oh, Higher Learning. Higher Learning. Uh, absolutely, I took this girl to see Higher Learning, and the movie is cra- at the end of the movie, uh, Michael Rappaport goes cra- he becomes, he gets roped into being a white supremacist with the skinhead group on campus. Never seen that. These guys were, I mean, like hardcore on-campus skinheads. But they still got loans.

• 14:50Joe Rogan?

  It's a science fiction movie.

• 14:51Speaker 01

  They're like, white power. Alright, I got, uh, I got social studies in a few minutes.

• 14:56Joe Rogan?

  On campus.

• 14:57Speaker 01

  I gotta go. Hey, can you finish, uh, can you finish nailing these crosses together?

• 15:00Joe Rogan?

  What year is this?

• 15:02Speaker 01

  Ninety-five.

• 15:03Joe Rogan?

  That's so crazy.

• 15:04Speaker 01

  Yeah, right when I graduated high school, and I take her to see this movie, and it said, the movie is, uh, Michael Rappaport joins the, the skinhead group, um, black people on this campus, a lot of things, there's like a black party going on. I think a white kid, uh, tried to rape a girl, Kristy Swanson, and then all the black guys go to help, and like, kind of beat up the kid who raped her, and then the cops, of course, come and get mad at the black people and save the rapist. Then Michael Rappaport goes nuts, goes on top of the school and starts picking off- Uh, black people.

• 15:36Joe Rogan?

  Uh, in a ninety minute arc?

• 15:38Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah. Starts picking off black people. Uh, one of them kills Omar Epps girlfriend Tyra Banks.

• 15:45Joe Rogan?

  Oh, god.

• 15:45Speaker 01

  And then he's, he gets into a fight. Omar Epps and him get into a fistfight. Over, and then the cops break it up, start beating the shit out of Omar Epps. And then Michael Rappaport, uh, pulls a gun out on the cops when they're trying to stop him and, and I know. The scene's trying to be like they're trying to keep the situation calm so nothing more crazy happens. But they're going like, it's okay, son. Everything's gonna be okay. We're okay, you know, while he's like holding the gun and then, uh, I think Michael Rappaport kills himself. Is how that ends and then. At the end, there's like a concert happening and they just put the word unlearn across the screen. And you can just hear black people on the audience go, what the fuck? And I was like, yo, let's go. Let's go. And she was like, what?

• 16:28Speaker 01

  And I was like, no, no, no, let's go. Like, do not let these credits start. Let's get in the car. And I mean, I don't know. How bad it got out there, but it was. A yelling, a lot of yelling. It was an inflammatory movie.

• 16:39Joe Rogan?

  Wow.

• 16:39Speaker 01

  There's no point in a movie where a white person got their, their due. It was always like, a white person fucks over black people and then the cops are like.

• 16:47Joe Rogan?

  Wow.

• 16:48Speaker 01

  You're fine.

• 16:49Joe Rogan?

  Jesus.

• 16:49Speaker 01

  Hey, shit happens, man.

• 16:51Joe Rogan?

  You can make a movie like that before the internet.

• 16:53Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 16:55Joe Rogan?

  You know?

• 16:56Speaker 01

  Yeah, cuz there wouldn't be a, a, a million signature proof. That this shouldn't be a thing or whatever.

• 17:02Joe Rogan?

  Well, it's also preposterous, like. Patently preposterous.

• 17:07Speaker 01

  Just to argue it?

• 17:08Joe Rogan?

  Well, if you, you're pretending there's a white power group on a college campus. How about ever? Is ever, like, this is crazy. Like, you found the one, that's what you used to study. The one college there's a white power group in it and like open, openly.

• 17:21Speaker 01

  Openly.

• 17:21Joe Rogan?

  What?

• 17:22Speaker 01

  Walking around, tattoos out.

• 17:24Joe Rogan?

  And all the cops are openly racist. Like, not just like, there's a racist cop, just like there's a racist fucking postman. You know, this is racist everything. There's a racist dentist out there somewhere.

• 17:34Speaker 01

  Yeah, but no, they make it like that, at the, today's meetings, like, alright. Let's round up some blacks, make sure these whites are okay.

• 17:40Joe Rogan?

  So crazy. So crazy. You could make a movie like that.

• 17:44Speaker 01

  I think you'd still be that kind of inflammatory. They'd go for it. Instead of that, I just watched that adolescence thing, which I thought was a.

• 17:50Joe Rogan?

  What is adolescence?

• 17:51Speaker 01

  It's this, uh. New, it's a four part, like, mini-series on Netflix. It's British. I'm like, I watch things so open-minded and just looking to be entertained that I miss messages a lot, but by the third episode, I realize it's about a little boy gets immediately accused of, uh, that's how it starts, of killing a classmate and he's getting arrested. Each episode is one-shot to me, it's like a play and the acting is unbelievable, but the, what it whittles down to, it's apparently like a, uh, from the, the videos I watched beyond, like this show explained, cause I look at all those and it was like an anti, like toxic masculinity, like message.

• 18:31Joe Rogan?

  Hmm.

• 18:32Speaker 01

  And the idea was just like, the kids watched porn and his dad's a tough guy. So that's why he thought he can kill a woman or why he can kill a girl.

• 18:42Joe Rogan?

  Wow.

• 18:43Speaker 01

  And they shout out, uh, and again, I don't know a lot of this guy's stuff, other than the basic idea, but they shout out Andrew Tate and when I heard that name, I was like, oh, that's what this is.

• 18:52Joe Rogan?

  But here's the thing, there is, that could be a real guy. Like that's less preposterous than the white power group on campus.

• 18:59Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, yeah, no doubt.

• 19:01Joe Rogan?

  There's kids that get radicalized, they got a, uh, an evil parent who, you know, who fucking-

• 19:06Speaker 01

  They didn't really make it that dad was evil, they were making it more like the porn and like the idea that like, mom should be in line and cooking.

• 19:13Joe Rogan?

  There's guys who grew up without a mom, those guys can def- if they have a shitty dad and no mom, those guys could definitely be, and if you have a psycho in your DNA.

• 19:22Speaker 01

  I had too much mom.

• 19:23Joe Rogan?

  No, you didn't. No, you had the perfect amount to make you. This episode is brought to you by my friends at Black Rifle Coffee. That's all I drink, folks. If you see me drinking coffee in the studio, it's Black Rifle Coffee. It's cause my friend Evan Hafer, who owns a company, I love him to death and they make the best coffee in the world. They put together the best energy drink in America, made with 200 milligrams of naturally sourced caffeine, low calories and absolutely zero sugar. It's available in four new delicious flavors. Project Mango, Ranger Berry, Freedom Punch and White Frost. Veteran-founded and veteran-led, each Black Rifle Coffee purchase you make helps them give back to those who serve our nation.

• 20:08Joe Rogan?

  Shop now at blackriflecoffee.com/joerogan with the code ROGEN for 30% off or visit your local grocery and convenience stores. Black Rifle Coffee, America's coffee.

• 20:22Speaker 01

  I had a, my little dad, lots of mom, just tendencies when I was, my step pop, man, he swooped in and saved my ass from really being as, as twirly as possible without being into cocks.

• 20:39Speaker 01

  I mean, I was like their prime for the take and I'm sitting there laying on my tummy as a kid watching Falcon Crest in Dallas with my mom.

• 20:50Joe Rogan?

  Oh my god, I can see that.

• 20:50Speaker 01

  That's what I know Lorenzo Lamas from. Falcon Crest, not Renegade like everybody else.

• 20:55Joe Rogan?

  Was Renegade the one where he was the karate guy?

• 20:57Speaker 01

  He was the karate guy, uh, but he was, uh, sent, he was a bounty hunter.

• 21:02Joe Rogan?

  That's right.

• 21:03Speaker 01

  On a motorcycle.

• 21:04Joe Rogan?

  But wasn't he like a karate guy too?

• 21:05Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 21:06Joe Rogan?

  I'm not making that up.

• 21:07Speaker 01

  Well, no, no, he would fight his fights with karate.

• 21:09Joe Rogan?

  That guy was so beautiful.

• 21:11Speaker 01

  He was gorgeous.

• 21:12Joe Rogan?

  So handsome.

• 21:13Speaker 01

  I know, it really is the, the sadness of a guy that handsome because he got a girl that was smoking hot. And then, what's it, Shawna Sand?

• 21:20Joe Rogan?

  Look at him.

• 21:22Speaker 01

  Yeah. He married, I think he married Shawna Sand, was like a Playboy girl. And then they break up and she gets crazy surgery, she looks like a lunatic, she's doing, starts doing porn.

• 21:31Joe Rogan?

  Oh no.

• 21:34Speaker 01

  And he still looks pretty great.

• 21:38Joe Rogan?

  He's had a ton of fucking series, those weird series that you like flip through in the middle of the night, like he's a motorcycle detective or something. You know, it's like, there's a bunch of those. How many series, he's one of those guys like always has a series.

• 21:50Speaker 01

  I mean, the alliteration of the name, he was handsome, it was all kind of perfect.

• 21:54Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. Does he have the hair anymore? Does he keep the long hair?

• 21:57Speaker 01

  No, there's no way.

• 21:58Joe Rogan?

  Cause he's still rocking, like Fabio still rocks it, he's not letting go.

• 22:01Speaker 01

  Damn.

• 22:03Joe Rogan?

  Respect. No, see, he's got short hair, look at him, even older with white hair, handsome as fuck.

• 22:07Speaker 01

  I mean, and, but, I mean comparatively too, if you look at the ex that was like his holy shit wife.

• 22:12Joe Rogan?

  She fell apart.

• 22:13Speaker 01

  They all fall apart.

• 22:15Joe Rogan?

  That surgery is a crazy way to go because you can't see what you look like. It's like anorexics or bodybuilders, you get dysmorphia, you, your brain starts playing tricks on you and you think your lips aren't big enough and your tits aren't big enough and your face is, you know, like there's some skin on the side of your ears, you can pull it back and you tuck this and pull that and my ass would stick out more if they put the implants in and that would probably get me a better, a better guy.

• 22:39Speaker 01

  I'd get a fat ass. I always say I'd crowdsource it. If the audience will pay for it, I'll get a fat ass.

• 22:45Joe Rogan?

  Let's find out what they do, cuz I'm bewildered. So, I know that there's an operation where they take fat out of other parts of your body and they stuff it in your ass. And your ass looks like a bag of cheese.

• 22:55Speaker 01

  There's bad ones.

• 22:57Joe Rogan?

  Maybe there's good ones. Maybe there's good ones. Maybe I'm being judgmental. There's probably a doctor out there, hey, I do it under the surface of the fat, so that there's always a smooth area on top, some wizard with a BMW.

• 23:08Speaker 01

  But at this point, there are good breast implants. At this point, there are. They exist.

• 23:12Joe Rogan?

  Yes, they feel real.

• 23:14Speaker 01

  But also, they look real and they don't have like the, where you have like the, you know, you see rib cage between them?

• 23:18Joe Rogan?

  Yes. But here's the thing. You are, um, putting something that's similar to breast tissue where breast tissue would be. So with this, your butt is a muscle.

• 23:31Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 23:31Joe Rogan?

  You know? It's like muscle and fat. A male. Why'd you say male, Jamie? He's a male. How dare you? What do you mean? Can expect to retain anywhere from sixty to eighty percent of the fat that is initially transferred into the butt. I like, when they say butt like that, I really think they're, you know, professional. Fuck, you're talking about surgery?

• 23:50Speaker 01

  Into the glutes?

• 23:51Joe Rogan?

  You're calling butt surgery?

• 23:52Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 23:53Joe Rogan?

  What kind of a fucking doctor? Let me see your diploma.

• 23:55Speaker 01

  Now, you're gonna wanna be gentle when you take a shit for the next three weeks.

• 23:58Joe Rogan?

  The rest will be reabsorbed by the body over time. The results you see immediately after surgery and in the weeks following are not permanent. Around ninety days post-op, your butt will finally stabilize into its new shape and size. The procedure itself is semi-permanent as opposed to permanent. As your body responds to natural aging process and normal weight fluctuations, so too will your buttocks. Depending on the precautions you take during your recovery and the lifespan you maintain in the time following, your BBL may last several years to even decades. I saw a dude at the mall the other day with a BBL.

• 24:32Speaker 01

  For sure?

• 24:32Joe Rogan?

  A hundred percent. No way it's real.

• 24:34Speaker 01

  Gay?

• 24:35Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. Super. How dare you ask that? Imagine, was it a gay guy? Imagine straight guys start getting BBLs?

• 24:42Speaker 01

  It has to exist.

• 24:44Joe Rogan?

  It has to.

• 24:45Speaker 01

  There's definitely a guy.

• 24:47Joe Rogan?

  There's probably a whole website dedicated to, like, normalizing straight guy BBLs.

• 24:53Joe Rogan?

  Daddy makeover. Just lift weights, you fucking pussy.

• 24:57Speaker 01

  Yeah, I mean...

• 24:58Joe Rogan?

  Just go to the gym and do the work. Shut your mouth and stop it with your BBL.

• 25:03Speaker 01

  And listen, I'll put it out there again, unless the crowd pays for it, I will get a fat ass.

• 25:08Joe Rogan?

  Here's the thing, I think there's other ways to do it, and this was my question. Cause I know there's an implant as well.

• 25:14Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 25:15Joe Rogan?

  So there's uh, there's butt implants, which is kind of even crazier. Because then you're taking the risk of having something, a foreign object in your ass, where everyone's scared to get cancer. Like if you're scared to get cancer, what's the place you're scared to get the cancer the most? Ass cancer. You don't have to shit in a bag, you know? So like, you're thinking about these plastic things that you've inserted into the muscle tissue, surrounding your, what kind of inflammation is gonna be caused by that? What about the plastic leeching into your body as you're in the sauna? What the fuck are you doing?

• 25:47Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's a weird thing, you know? I can't believe they still have perfected dick surgery, dick lengthening or dick getting surgery, but what's crazy is there are procedures and people get them.

• 25:59Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 26:00Speaker 01

  I couldn't imagine getting a procedure that's been done like under a thousand times yet.

• 26:06Joe Rogan?

  Well, here's the thing, man.

• 26:07Speaker 01

  You don't wanna be the first, you don't wanna be the first tonsillectomy, and that's like routine.

• 26:10Joe Rogan?

  Isn't it kinda shocking that no one's figured out a way to make a bigger dick? It's kind of shocking.

• 26:15Speaker 01

  It is shocking, that's what I'm saying, I'm surprised that hasn't been a thing.

• 26:17Joe Rogan?

  There's the butt, the butt enlargement. Intramuscular buttock implants. So now when they say buttock, I feel a little more comfortable.

• 26:25Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 26:25Joe Rogan?

  I feel like these are real pros. So you're gonna take those plastic, what are those things made out of, Jamie? Let's find out how toxic they are.

• 26:31Speaker 01

  But to me, what, those ones are dirty.

• 26:33Joe Rogan?

  They pulled them out of a butt.

• 26:34Speaker 01

  Oh, they took them out.

• 26:34Joe Rogan?

  He's a detransitioner.

• 26:37Joe Rogan?

  Okay, so what does it say? Buck, butt augmentation is most commonly performed by fat injections, dah dah dah dah dah dah dah dah. While men can do like women's synthetic, oh. While men can do like women's synthetic filters, fillers, oh, synthetic fillers, oh boy. And fat injections, they often are less tolerant to the procedures that require multiple treatments and whose effects are more modest.

• 27:07Joe Rogan?

  Interesting. They're often smaller and flatter buttocks are more resistant to augmentation efforts with stronger intergluteal muscles and a thinner subcutaneous fat layer. So he's saying, "I can do it to dudes, but it's not gonna come out good."

• 27:22Speaker 01

  Isn't it crazy that the only real end game of this? Cause like, what's the benefit in your life?

• 27:29Joe Rogan?

  More dick.

• 27:30Speaker 01

  But it's like, it's like money. It's like ultimately it's like finding someone who's gonna like your weird body more.

• 27:35Joe Rogan?

  You think it's money for dudes?

• 27:36Speaker 01

  It's like, oh, for dudes.

• 27:37Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, these are dudes. That's a dude.

• 27:39Speaker 01

  Oh, that's, that's just gay, probably.

• 27:41Joe Rogan?

  Gay as fuck.

• 27:42Speaker 01

  Or maybe the guy was also crowdsourced and maybe they paid for it.

• 27:45Joe Rogan?

  Maybe, it's just, yeah. Uh, solid ultra soft silicon buttock implants of 400 cc were placed in a layered muscle and incision closure done, no drains were used. His long-term results showed good improvement. Scroll up, please. His buttock size and shape is even probably better in that regard than I thought could occur. Ew. It looks fake. Like there's a lump. There's a lump where you have a tumor in your ass, sir. Like, look, there's like a little ridge where all of a sudden the implant is. That's so weird that I'm staring at this guy's butt so long.

• 28:21Speaker 01

  I don't think it's the same guy.

• 28:23Joe Rogan?

  It's the same guy. I trust these people.

• 28:27Speaker 01

  Why would the internet lie?

• 28:27Joe Rogan?

  They're buttock people.

• 28:28Speaker 01

  Why would the internet lie?

• 28:29Joe Rogan?

  They wouldn't lie.

• 28:30Speaker 01

  But the penis surgeries are like nutty thing from like cutting a tendon.

• 28:36Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, to make it just poke out a little more. And then there's other ones where they thicken it up. They get in there with a mesh and thicken it up. Nice sauce.

• 28:46Speaker 01

  When I was heavier even, I went to, I got a consultation, free consultation at a plastic surgeon. I was like, I bet if I, I'm fine with my hard dick, but I hate my soft hang sometimes. And I was like, I bet if I got my gunt sucked out, liposuctioned, it'll make it a

• 29:06Joe Rogan?

  You dick more, bro.

• 29:07Speaker 01

  It'll make it look bigger, soft, uh, particularly. And I'm like, so I went to the consultation and it was a male doctor, so you're like, okay. And he gets you, I mean, I knew he was gonna have to look ultimately at one point. But this guy, uh, takes me to me, he goes, he goes, "All right, drop your pants." I dropped my pants. And I also have doctor dick. You know, like it's, I'm also a guy, so I'm like, shit. And you can't like, I didn't wanna try to like

• 29:30Joe Rogan?

  Fluff it up.

• 29:31Speaker 01

  Yeah, fluff it before he walks in, it's weird too.

• 29:33Joe Rogan?

  Put a rubber band around your balls.

• 29:35Speaker 01

  So I um, he fucking uh comes in and he's like uh, drop your pants. He goes, walk over to this mirror, which I was like, oh god, don't make me do this. And I stand in front of the mirror and he goes, on either side of my dick with his hands and he goes, right now it looks like this, and I can make it look, and he pushes my fat back and goes, like this.

• 30:01Joe Rogan?

  His dick is just inches from your face.

• 30:03Speaker 01

  I was like.

• 30:03Joe Rogan?

  The whole time.

• 30:04Speaker 01

  Uh huh.

• 30:06Speaker 01

  I pulled my pants up like a victim and left the office and never even thought about it again. That was crazy.

• 30:11Joe Rogan?

  That's a weird look.

• 30:13Speaker 01

  Yeah, he was like here.

• 30:14Joe Rogan?

  Just getting in there.

• 30:15Speaker 01

  And then here.

• 30:15Joe Rogan?

  I'm gonna move my face six inches from your dick, but don't worry. I went to school.

• 30:22Speaker 01

  A doctor looking up at you? Do you like that?

• 30:26Joe Rogan?

  You see the framed diploma? This is fine, this is fine.

• 30:30Speaker 01

  This is a safe space.

• 30:31Joe Rogan?

  This is, what does your dick taste like? I wonder.

• 30:33Speaker 01

  Oh man, there's no way he doesn't go out and talk to those hot ass nurses about my little weiner.

• 30:37Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, definitely. The littlest dick, oh my god, it smelled like cheese.

• 30:41Speaker 01

  I don't know, at this point they expose so many people, do you believe anybody's genuine goodness anymore?

• 30:46Joe Rogan?

  It's hard to believe. You know, I went down a deep dive, looking at uh doctors who use their own sperm in uh fertility clinics.

• 30:54Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 30:55Joe Rogan?

  Cause I was, I was researching this one case, I was just, you know, I just wanted to find out like, god, how did this guy do? How'd they catch him? What happened? Then I found there's like hundreds of cases.

• 31:04Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, it's got.

• 31:05Joe Rogan?

  There's hundreds of cases. There's hundreds of cases of doctors doing this. There's doctors using their own sperm and then people finding out on 23andMe because it's like fucking everybody in the neighborhood is related.

• 31:17Speaker 01

  It's just their kink? Just to like jerk off in the vials?

• 31:19Joe Rogan?

  It's just such a crazy thing. There's so many fucking psychos out there.

• 31:25Speaker 01

  What are you gonna giggle at while you're injecting a girl with your jizz? And you're like, hmm hmm.

• 31:29Joe Rogan?

  I had this guy on yesterday that spent 25 years as an undercover FBI guy that infiltrated biker gangs and neo Nazis and... Bro. Like, you talk to a guy like that and you start really, really wondering, like, what, where, where's the good in the world? How, how many creeps are there? Like, how many really fucking psychotic people are out there organizing right now in the world?

• 31:54Speaker 01

  It's a wild thing to go with, like, different groups undercover though, too, if they ever overlap someday. Like, and you go, hey, you were a skinhead two months ago. When'd you become a biker?

• 32:04Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, exactly. And this guy is... Look at him. I'm gonna show you a picture of him. Just a big fucking giant dude.

• 32:11Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 32:12Joe Rogan?

  With a goatee and pulled back hair and tattoos all over his arms. So he, like, blended right in with all these psychos.

• 32:18Speaker 01

  Thank God. I used to have a... When I was young, I had a joke about the concept of, like, with hookers, where you have to... They go, whoa, if you ask them if they're a cop. They, they'll tell you. They tell you, they have to tell you, or it's entrapment. And I was like, then what the fuck is undercover work? You guys, I said, doing like five years with the mob. And then one day they go, hey, you know, I never even asked you. This is stupid, but are you a cop? It's like, shit, man, yeah.

• 32:43Joe Rogan?

  I, I think that was like a-

• 32:44Speaker 01

  You were at my kid's christening. Ah, I know, man. You never asked. I swore at this point, I thought you were never gonna ask.

• 32:50Joe Rogan?

  I think that was like a dumb thing they made up for TV shows. You know? And then everybody thought it was real. It was like some dumb plot point.

• 32:57Speaker 01

  Are you a cop? No. Yeah, of course you could say no.

• 33:01Joe Rogan?

  Right, because the good guy who was the cop always had to be honest.

• 33:04Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 33:05Joe Rogan?

  He would never lie. This guy, he, this, he was telling me about, he had to do cocaine with these people. They had to beat people up. And he's like, if shit went down, man, I had to be a part of it.

• 33:14Speaker 01

  The prostitutes' things they would do on cops were always, they'd get in the car and they'd be like, are you a cop? And you go, come on. Do I look like a cop?

• 33:21Joe Rogan?

  Bro, this guy got busted wearing a wire. And got away with it.

• 33:25Speaker 01

  Really?

• 33:25Joe Rogan?

  They didn't find the wire.

• 33:27Speaker 01

  No shit.

• 33:27Joe Rogan?

  They came that close. He said they were inches away. They were rubbing his clothes, like, checking all his clothes. He said they were inches away. But he was like, arguing with them. I can't fucking believe you guys, like, that kind of shit.

• 33:38Speaker 01

  After I, after I mysteriously showed up three weeks ago, and now I'm working my way through the ranks. Now you're gonna start patting me down. Alright.

• 33:46Joe Rogan?

  And I'm helping you run guns and drugs to Mexico.

• 33:49Speaker 01

  Guys, I bought donuts yesterday morning. I'm, I'm that guy.

• 33:51Joe Rogan?

  I'm that guy. I am your brother.

• 33:55Speaker 01

  I'm the dude.

• 33:56Joe Rogan?

  And meanwhile, they all go to jail eventually.

• 33:58Speaker 01

  Do you have like also, also when they do undercover, it still seems like some, like when they would go home at night still? Come out of their biker clothes. How was it hun? Like, these guys are animals. I hope one of them didn't happen to follow me home.

• 34:12Joe Rogan?

  Well, he was, he was not doing things that were anywhere near his home. That's it. He would go away for long stretches at a time and go back and forth. And he had all these reasons for doing so, different businesses that he did, that he was involved with.

• 34:24Speaker 01

  Did he ever like find himself, I mean, you kind of like hang with somebody that much time and they think you're their friend. Do they ever get like sympathy for them ever?

• 34:31Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah, yeah, definitely. That's one of the more fascinating parts about it. It was like, he, this guy that he had to put in jail, he's like, that guy was like my friend. He's like, I've, we finished each other's sentences. We were just like each other. Other than the fact that he was a criminal and I was an FBI agent. And I was like, do you think that you could have gone down that road? Have you had the wrong lives? Like, abso fucking lutely, man. Abso fucking lutely, because all of us could have. I go, that's what I think too. I think.

• 34:56Speaker 01

  That's what happened to Michael Rappaport in Higher Learning.

• 34:59Joe Rogan?

  He got it with the wrong crowd. He was a regular guy with good intentions. Next thing you know, he's shooting women. Super normal in a 90 minute arc of a film.

• 35:08Speaker 01

  It was so much, so fast.

• 35:10Joe Rogan?

  How does it change? Unless he's the star of the film where they follow him every step of the way.

• 35:15Speaker 01

  He was a Clockwork Orange for black people. They, they, I mean, they put like, it was like, for 90 minutes, you just bl- yeah.

• 35:21Joe Rogan?

  Michael Rappaport as this kid is hilarious.

• 35:24Speaker 01

  You gotta see when the cop, it's when the cops have him at the end and they're like, son, everything's gonna be fine. You're white.

• 35:31Joe Rogan?

  Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Rappaport does a really good job of complaining about things. Like, he's always got something that he's fucking screaming and yelling about.

• 35:41Speaker 01

  He's pretty hyped about Israel, seems.

• 35:43Joe Rogan?

  It seems like it, yeah.

• 35:44Speaker 01

  I've only seen him hyped about two things, Israel and Ari.

• 35:51Speaker 01

  Those are the only two things that have ever hyped up Michael Rapaport. And also, I think, uh, the rising of the black race also, I think, pissed him off a scene in that scene.

• 36:01Joe Rogan?

  In that scene, but to his credit, that was the 90s.

• 36:03Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 36:04Joe Rogan?

  Nobody knew better back then.

• 36:06Speaker 01

  Well, that's so funny for him also. If you remember his first big role, great movie called Zebra Head.

• 36:11Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah.

• 36:13Speaker 01

  And he was like, uh, because that was more of his thing. He's more of like a, like a wig kid.

• 36:18Joe Rogan?

  Do the right thing too, right? Was he in Do the Right Thing?

• 36:20Speaker 01

  I don't know. I don't know if he was in that. True Romance, for sure. That was great.

• 36:24Joe Rogan?

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• 37:07Joe Rogan?

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• 37:16Speaker 04

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• 37:47Joe Rogan?

  Do the Right Thing was Spike Lee's first big hit, right? I think he was in that.

• 37:52Speaker 01

  May have been.

• 37:53Joe Rogan?

  Was he in it, Jeremy?

• 37:55Speaker 01

  I didn't watch a lot of Spike Lee.

• 37:56Joe Rogan?

  Oh, he had some bangers in the early days. Mo Betta Blues made me feel lazy. Cause I remember Denzel Washington would practice every day. You know, like he was an artist. He would practice every day and his girl was trying to fuck. And he was like, no, no, no, I have to practice. And I was like, wow, I wish I was like him.

• 38:13Speaker 01

  I wish I would practice more than pussy.

• 38:14Joe Rogan?

  I would think about that like as a comic, like even when I was a professional comic in the early days, I didn't spend my whole day writing. I was fucking off, playing pool and hanging out with my friends.

• 38:24Speaker 03

  You might be thinking of True Romance. He was in that.

• 38:27Joe Rogan?

  No, no, I thought it was a.

• 38:29Speaker 03

  Or, uh, sorry, uh, Do the Right Thing. His first movie was in ninety-two.

• 38:33Joe Rogan?

  Oh, really? Interesting.

• 38:35Speaker 01

  You're thinking of Danny Aiello.

• 38:37Joe Rogan?

  I don't know who I'm thinking of. Who am I thinking of? Go to Do the Right Thing cast.

• 38:42Speaker 01

  Turturro?

• 38:43Joe Rogan?

  Maybe I'm thinking of Turturro.

• 38:45Speaker 01

  That is probably who you're thinking of, actually.

• 38:47Joe Rogan?

  That is who I'm thinking of.

• 38:48Speaker 01

  It's hard to see in that picture, but when he was younger.

• 38:50Joe Rogan?

  He's younger. He's, he's, I mean, um, Michael's a lot younger.

• 38:54Speaker 01

  But Zebrahead, yeah, he was like his, uh, like his whole thing is like a hip hop guy.

• 38:58Joe Rogan?

  That's right.

• 38:59Speaker 01

  So it's so funny that he plays this like, uh, major role. As like, uh, a white, fucking white supremacist.

• 39:07Joe Rogan?

  You gotta take what you can get, you know? It's acting, bro.

• 39:10Speaker 01

  It is acting.

• 39:10Joe Rogan?

  Robert De Niro really was a psycho in Taxi Driver?

• 39:13Speaker 01

  No.

• 39:13Joe Rogan?

  No?

• 39:14Speaker 01

  Maybe.

• 39:15Joe Rogan?

  Go watch that movie again. Whoa.

• 39:17Speaker 01

  You know, it's funny, the building, uh, I lived in in New York. On Fifty Seventh Street is the old Taxi Depot that they shot Taxi Driver in.

• 39:26Joe Rogan?

  Really?

• 39:27Speaker 01

  And they keep, uh, downstairs, like where the gym and stuff is, they have the signs still. They keep the sign, the original signs. For the parking lot. That was a good movie.

• 39:36Joe Rogan?

  That was a fucking great movie. And if Robert De Niro just never gave a political speech, I would think about him that way.

• 39:43Speaker 01

  You can't make a movie like that with a budget anymore.

• 39:46Joe Rogan?

  Well, you can't make a movie.

• 39:47Speaker 01

  Every movie with balls, it has to be an indie flick.

• 39:49Joe Rogan?

  A hundred percent, yeah. Or you have to be some beyond reproach director that they just let do whatever they want. Like a Tarantino. Like, there's no way, uh, Once Upon a Time in Hollywood went through some sort of an executive focus group.

• 40:03Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 40:03Joe Rogan?

  There's no fucking way. He's killing women, smashing their head on a mantle. Spoiler alert. I mean, dogs are eating dicks.

• 40:11Speaker 01

  What a brilliant, what a brilliant ending, though.

• 40:13Joe Rogan?

  Oh, that movie's great.

• 40:15Speaker 01

  So good.

• 40:16Joe Rogan?

  It's so good. I love that movie.

• 40:17Speaker 01

  It's, I don't know if I've seen that final scene where they flip history. Um, I've never had an audience in a movie theater like communally laugh like that since the Jackass movies.

• 40:27Joe Rogan?

  Right, right.

• 40:28Speaker 01

  Jackass two.

• 40:30Joe Rogan?

  It was a cheering moment, too. That was a fucking great movie. He's got all bangers. He's the only guy that I could say as a, meh. There's a few others you probably could put in that argument. That have zero movies where I'm like, eh.

• 40:42Speaker 01

  Oh, that have no, like, everything's good?

• 40:44Joe Rogan?

  Tarantino? There's not one that I can think of that wasn't fucking awesome.

• 40:49Speaker 01

  Crap.

• 40:52Speaker 01

  I liked a movie that you have to try to figure out, but when you can't figure it out and other people can't figure it out, you're like, this is just a hunk of shit, then.

• 40:58Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 40:59Speaker 01

  You can't be so artistic that no- nothing makes sense.

• 41:02Joe Rogan?

  James Cameron's done some fucking bangers.

• 41:04Speaker 01

  Do you watch, like, uh, I've gone through on the road and watched, like, the twenty-five most disturbing movies of all time?

• 41:11Joe Rogan?

  No, I don't like being disturbed that much. Do you?

• 41:14Speaker 01

  Yeah, I think so. I mean, I just kind of see where, like, how far people will go in a movie. There's some, I mean, Serbian films, the most notorious.

• 41:21Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, there's some fucking psycho movies. Like, who's that one, that evil clown that kills everybody and doesn't talk? The Terrifier?

• 41:28Speaker 01

  Oh, Terrifier, yeah, yeah.

• 41:29Joe Rogan?

  Bro, these movies are fucked up.

• 41:32Speaker 01

  Yeah, but they're campy on purpose. Like, they're so over the top, like violence, that's silly.

• 41:37Joe Rogan?

  Category of film. I was really into horror movies when I was young, and there was a whole category of films that were just gore films. It was, they were called gore. It was like a gore, it was so those guys would like chop women up with an axe and pull their guts out and rub mole their face, like, fuck.

• 41:52Speaker 01

  They also had excessive, uh, nudity in them.

• 41:55Joe Rogan?

  Always.

• 41:55Speaker 01

  Those were the horror, the horror boxes at the video store that were bigger than everything else. Like those, like, I spit on your grave, movies like that. Like, the box was way bigger, so you really had to walk up like a piece of shit. I'm gonna watch this rape revenge movie with my other teenage friends, thank you.

• 42:13Joe Rogan?

  Nothing like a good slasher rape revenge movie.

• 42:16Speaker 01

  Yeah, there's so many.

• 42:16Joe Rogan?

  Revenge movies are the fucking best. Why is that? We're so dumb. We like to just sit there and watch this guy kick everybody's ass. Yeah, fuck him up.

• 42:24Speaker 01

  Yeah, it's Robocop.

• 42:25Joe Rogan?

  Love it.

• 42:26Speaker 01

  It's a fantasy.

• 42:27Joe Rogan?

  Did you ever see Sisu?

• 42:29Speaker 01

  No.

• 42:30Joe Rogan?

  I think it's my favorite, it's next to John Wick, it's my favorite, it's probably right up there with John Wick. It's my favorite revenge movie of all time. It's about a guy, and the whole movie has no English in it. It's in World War II. Is it Finland? I think so. And this dude is a soldier who retired from the war and became a gold miner. And made a little score and was trying to get to the town with his score and he runs into the Nazis. And it's so fun. It's so fun. Because you could tell this guy does not want to do this.

• 43:08Joe Rogan?

  But he's gotta kill everybody. And they all get cocky with him.

• 43:13Speaker 01

  What do you think the mindset is?

• 43:18Speaker 01

  Nice.

• 43:22Joe Rogan?

  So it turns out this guy was like famous in the war for being impossible to kill. He has scars all over his body. He's like the absolute worst guy.

• 43:33Joe Rogan?

  And they found him, and he kills everybody. Spoiler alert. And it's fucking great. It's just fun.

• 43:39Speaker 01

  What do you think the mindset is between, behind like a Liam Neeson? Who, I mean, there's a movie comes out, almost bimonthly, of him getting revenge for something.

• 43:50Joe Rogan?

  Hey, it's a living.

• 43:51Speaker 01

  I get, Bruce Willis started doing that towards the end. Bruce Willis at the end started doing that.

• 43:56Joe Rogan?

  Did he?

• 43:57Speaker 01

  Yeah, just movies that were just like two words or something.

• 44:00Joe Rogan?

  Well, I think he was suffering from that illness for quite a while. You know what it is? It's called aphasia.

• 44:06Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, it's dementia, right?

• 44:08Joe Rogan?

  It's not good. Yeah, it's bad. It's real bad. I don't know what causes it, whether it's genetic or what have you, but people, they slip away. And he might have, you know, towards the end, I mean.

• 44:20Speaker 01

  He just goes, this guy.

• 44:21Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, he's got a lot of them. They're all him with the gun. Like, it's all him with the gun. And here's the thing, that him with the gun shit started later in his life.

• 44:30Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 44:31Joe Rogan?

  That's what's crazy. He became like a guy who fucks people up in his sixties.

• 44:35Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 44:35Joe Rogan?

  Like, how old is he now? How old is he now? He's seventy-two and he's fucking people up in movies.

• 44:42Speaker 01

  Oscar Schindler. Schindler's List.

• 44:44Joe Rogan?

  Bro, when you're seventy-two, it's hard to get out of bed. You know, you're like, oh.

• 44:49Speaker 01

  When I saw Schindler's List, it made me think of, uh, now I give the prices of everything and amount of Jews I could have saved. Like, how much is this TV? It was about twelve Jews.

• 44:58Joe Rogan?

  It's, um, what was that you just pulled up, Jamie? You were showing me?

• 45:01Speaker 03

  They're remaking The Naked Gun.

• 45:02Joe Rogan?

  They are, with Liam Neeson?

• 45:04Speaker 03

  I guess, I don't know. Well, there's a few movies that they've, people have gotten a few AI things passed through and everyone takes as real. Like, I've seen it.

• 45:11Joe Rogan?

  Oh, right, I've seen that.

• 45:13Speaker 01

  I believe those every day.

• 45:15Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, I saw Keanu Reeves as Dracula and I was like, really? God, they stopped me right in, like, Keanu Reeves is gonna be Dracula now? That's crazy, because he was in the Dracula movie back in the day and he was Dracula's girlfriend's boyfriend.

• 45:27Speaker 01

  They always get me with like a Rob Zombie's remaking something you love.

• 45:33Speaker 01

  They're always listening. Have you had him on?

• 45:36Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, he was a cool guy to talk to.

• 45:38Speaker 01

  He was, I toured with him. I've met him a handful of times, he's good friends with Tom Papa, we've been introduced in that regard and whenever I see him, it's the blank of like, nope. I went onstage right before him the entire tour and he has no recollection.

• 45:56Speaker 01

  One time, um, this is a great story, I was, uh, we had tickets, uh, to go, or passes to go see Rob Zombie's, I think it was the Halloween, the original Halloween remake he did.

• 46:07Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah.

• 46:08Speaker 01

  And comedian Julian McCullough had these passes, four of us, it was gonna be me, uh, Nate Bargatze, and I'm trying to remember, uh, Dave Smith? Yeah, it was Dave Smith and Julian McCullough. And I'd auditioned for a TV show. The morning of that and it was the first audition I ever did that it went well, went really well. And I got it. I got the, the part, it was like the show was on for two years called Z Rock. But they go, this is how much acting is not my passion or something like that. They go, uh, we need you to come back in at like four for a table read we're gonna do. And all I thought was, I was like, shit, that Rob Zombie movie starts at like six o'clock. I'm like,

• 46:49Speaker 01

  how long are we gonna be here for? They're like, it's only been an hour or so if, when we get back here. And it was going, it was running late when we got back there. So I told Nate Bargatze to go, I'm like, hey, go down there and get in line, you know, to make sure we get into this thing. I don't know if they're overselling it or not. And he goes, alright. So I get out of this thing and we're, I'm rushing down, we're walking to this movie theater and I call Nate. Uh, this is so defeating. I go, hey, you're down. He goes, I don't know if I'm at the right theater. And I went, what do you mean? He goes, I mean, there's a big line for something. And I was like, ah, go get in that line Nate. And he was like, oh, that's it? So we get there. We're so far back in line, there's no way we're getting to this movie.

• 47:33Speaker 01

  And I'm like, shit, Julian's very handsome. So we send him up to kind of schmooze the girl up front. No dice. And then I see Rob Zombie walk into the diner next door. And I go, this might be our chance. I, we just are loosely connected and, you know, maybe I can get him to remember. And we go in there, it's my best interaction with him ever. I, I go up, I go, hey, Rob, I go, Jay Oakerson, I go, we met through Tom Papa before and Bob. And he's like, oh, yeah. And he shoots this shit with us for like five minutes. And then I go, well, anyway, man, I'm really excited for the movie. I hope we get in, you know, we're like, super far back in line. He goes, you'll be fine. Just, and then we, and we did not get in. We rode a hot subway home together staring at Nate.

• 48:16Joe Rogan?

  Oh no, you'll be fine.

• 48:18Speaker 01

  Yeah, he goes, nah, you'll be fine.

• 48:20Joe Rogan?

  You'll be fine is I'm not gonna help you.

• 48:22Speaker 01

  Yeah, it really wasn't. Flat out, he goes, this has been great, but leave me alone now.

• 48:26Joe Rogan?

  The thing about it though is like, does he save tickets? Like, does he have a block of tickets saved?

• 48:32Speaker 01

  For sure. For sure.

• 48:37Joe Rogan?

  Not for the guy at the diner, though.

• 48:39Speaker 01

  There's some people you just don't resonate with in the world, I think. In a time, I don't know. Dave Chappelle's another one. Dave Chappelle, I've met over the last 25 years, a dozen times. I did some punch-ups on season one of Chappelle's show. He bumped me and Kurt Metzger off a weekend, uh, in the thing, and we were there, and we hung out with him there. And every time I see him still, it's completely unfamiliar. Chris Rock, same thing. I do not make an impression with these people.

• 49:06Joe Rogan?

  That's so weird.

• 49:07Speaker 01

  I also shut down around celebrity.

• 49:09Joe Rogan?

  Oh, maybe that's it.

• 49:10Speaker 01

  So I'm not, I can't inject, uh, my personality out of the gates, uh, in a situation where I'm intimidated by like some, I'm like, where I go, not intimidated, but I go, "Man, I really want them to like me."

• 49:22Joe Rogan?

  Isn't that weird? Because you know so many famous people.

• 49:26Speaker 01

  But, uh, but, you know what I mean by wanting to like, not like me, but I go, if I try to be funny and I whiff.

• 49:32Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 49:33Speaker 01

  This sucks.

• 49:34Joe Rogan?

  You just feel nervous.

• 49:35Speaker 01

  Right, so I'm like, I could just lay low and not take the risk of being not funny by accident.

• 49:42Joe Rogan?

  That's hilarious. It's hard to feel like-

• 49:44Speaker 01

  There's no one who intimidates you anymore. I mean, the people you have in here and just strike a conversation with is unbelievable.

• 49:49Joe Rogan?

  No, people don't intimidate me anymore. They, uh, inspire me. Some people are fascinating. They inspire me.

• 49:55Speaker 01

  Every time I have a big guest coming in that I don't know on, uh, me and Bobby Kelly on the radio show, and someone's coming in, I get like, when they're like, "All right, we're gonna go get them now," I'm always like, "Wait." "All right, wait, okay, go get them," because I'm like, "Shit, what do we even start with?"

• 50:09Joe Rogan?

  I used to be like that on Opie and Anthony.

• 50:11Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 50:11Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, when I go on Opie and Anthony and like they'd have famous guests there, I'd be like, "Holy shit, you know, that's this guy." "Holy shit, that's that guy."

• 50:18Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 50:19Joe Rogan?

  That's weird.

• 50:19Speaker 01

  The first time I went there, I got bumped back to the couch for Ace Frehley. There's a party who's like, "This sucks, but wow, it's Ace fucking Frehley."

• 50:26Joe Rogan?

  I met Ace Frehley when I was a little kid.

• 50:28Speaker 01

  Really?

• 50:28Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, my uncle was an artist, and he was, uh, working for, um, this, uh, advertising agency in New York City, where they made album covers. So they made album covers for Kiss. So my uncle was one of the artists that made the album covers for a lot of the Kiss albums.

• 50:45Speaker 01

  No shit.

• 50:46Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, so I was in his, uh, office hanging out with him during the day. I was probably... Eight or something like that. I was fucking young, man. And maybe I was a little older than that. I can't remember. It's hard to remember. But I was a little kid. It was pre-high school. And um, this guy walks in, was like, you know, long hair, looks weird. Just like a weird dude. And he made some like weird noise like

• 51:10Joe Rogan?

  It was real strange. And then everybody goes, hey Ace, hey Ace. And I was like, what? Like that's, that's Ace Frehley with no makeup on? Like this is crazy.

• 51:20Speaker 01

  He was old?

• 51:21Joe Rogan?

  And he uh, signed a napkin for me.

• 51:24Speaker 01

  Do you have it?

• 51:25Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, well no, I don't think I have it anymore. Maybe my mom might have it. I'll ask her. I doubt it. It got lost somewhere. But uh, it was the craziest thing. I was like, wow, that's the famous guy with no makeup. Cause everywhere they went, they were, people were paparazzi were always trying to catch them. You know, like Gene Simmons would wear like a bandit's mask. And they were always trying to catch him without their makeup on.

• 51:45Speaker 01

  Has a celebrity ever let you down? Like when you met them?

• 51:48Joe Rogan?

  Not really.

• 51:49Speaker 01

  No?

• 51:49Joe Rogan?

  Honestly, no. No, it was not like, no, no.

• 51:53Speaker 01

  I've always worried about that. Like Marilyn Manson was always somebody I wanted to meet. And then when he went through all this shit, did not want to meet. So I was like, stay away. But then I wanted to like, I very much would like to meet. I think he's such an interesting character. But like, I'm like, you can, I'm such a fan since I was a kid that I'm like, this could only let me down somehow.

• 52:09Joe Rogan?

  I met him. He's very interesting. He's an artist.

• 52:12Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 52:13Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, he's a, you know. If you think of some of the songs he's made, like Beautiful People. You don't make that unless you're out of your fucking mind. Like that's part of the, that's part of the package. You want brilliant fucking wild music? You gotta get a dude who's out of his fucking mind.

• 52:29Speaker 01

  Do you have any theories on why people can't, like, classic amazing bands can't make a classic again? Comedians can still write their best joke.

• 52:38Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 52:38Speaker 01

  And, and it will be accepted. Everyone's looking for that. What's the new thing? But like, if Guns N' Roses got everybody back together again and sat in a room for three months, they can't make Welcome to the Jungle again.

• 52:50Joe Rogan?

  They're not the same guys. You know, that's part of the problem. And then also part of the problem is, I went to see Guns N' Roses in Athens. I saw them in Greece. It was just a total coincidence. I was there with my family and I ran into Axl Rose at a restaurant.

• 53:04Speaker 01

  This is more recent?

• 53:04Joe Rogan?

  Real recent.

• 53:05Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 53:06Joe Rogan?

  Last summer, or yeah, like last summer, the summer before last, summer before last, I guess. And, uh, you know, it's one of those weird moments. I'm like, God, I hope he knows who I am. You know what I mean? I'm gonna go say hi, I'm gonna be a dick. And this is after my friend tried to say hi to him and he got shooed away.

• 53:20Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 53:21Joe Rogan?

  Uh, so I went over to his table and he was like, oh, hey, man, what's up? I'm like, phew. I go, really nice to meet you. I'm a huge fan of this thing. He goes, we're doing a concert here tomorrow night. You wanna see him? I'm like, fuck, yeah. And so my whole family went to see Guns N' Roses. We were backstage watching. It was amazing. Three hour performance. These guys are in their sixties.

• 53:37Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 53:38Joe Rogan?

  They're fucking rocking hard.

• 53:39Speaker 01

  I saw them on the new tour.

• 53:40Joe Rogan?

  Three hours. But the thing is, they have so many hits. If, if you want them to do all the, the songs you love, it's gonna take a long time. And if they're gonna add new songs.

• 53:50Speaker 01

  Isn't it crazy too that it's essentially four albums?

• 53:52Joe Rogan?

  Crazy.

• 53:53Speaker 01

  All of that from four albums.

• 53:55Joe Rogan?

  Bangers.

• 53:56Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 53:57Joe Rogan?

  You know?

• 53:57Speaker 01

  They did great. I was, I was pretty impressed with, uh, from, again, the age.

• 54:01Joe Rogan?

  Dude, Welcome to the Jungle to this day. I'll, I'll hear that song and go, God damn, that was a fucking good song.

• 54:07Speaker 01

  I took my parents to see it in, in, uh, Madison Square Garden. And it was such a weird, I got so strange. The things I got emotional about are ridiculous. I got like teary eyed emotional when it starts Welcome to the Jungle, you know, they start playing the riff. And, uh, I got immediately teary eyed because I was like, it just took me back immediately to a time. It was like a time travel. And I was like, holy shit, I'm like 11, 12 years old and got this album. And my mom was like, what is that shit, you know? And now my mom's like here with me, watching them as a classic rock band.

• 54:36Joe Rogan?

  What year did Welcome to the Jungle come out?

• 54:38Speaker 01

  Eighty-seven, I wanna say. Eighty-six.

• 54:42Joe Rogan?

  I remember being right out of high school at the gym, lifting weights. The first time I heard it, they were, you know, at the gym, everybody would just play what's on the radio. You know, WCOZ. And you, we were listening to the, uh, I think it was WBCN, The Rock of Boston. Appetite for Destruction, eighty-seven. Yep. So that was two years out of high school. And I was like, wow, listen to this.

• 55:08Speaker 01

  Do you know the first time I heard it and like, kinda backwards tracked it from there? I think it came out, pretty sure it came out first. Was the movie Deadpool.

• 55:17Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah.

• 55:18Speaker 01

  The Deadpool, Clint Eastwood.

• 55:19Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 55:20Speaker 01

  And the scene was Jim, pre-famous Jim Carrey, plays a rock star junkie. And they're shooting his music video and the song they're using is Welcome to the Jungle.

• 55:31Joe Rogan?

  Really?

• 55:31Speaker 01

  Yeah, you can see it's a pretty popular scene. If you look that up Deadpool, uh, the Deadpool. The Deadpool Jim Carrey.

• 55:38Joe Rogan?

  When did Motley Crue come out with Kick Start My Heart?

• 55:43Speaker 01

  That's probably eighty-six.

• 55:44Joe Rogan?

  That's, that was my favorite workout song of all time. Look at that.

• 55:50Speaker 01

  Jim Carrey.

• 55:51Joe Rogan?

  That's Jim Carrey.

• 55:52Speaker 01

  Isn't it funny, even though he's not being funny at all, he's still, it's like his movements are so Jim Carrey.

• 56:02Joe Rogan?

  Like, again, right, but like, again, you don't get to be Jim Carrey unless you're out of your fucking mind.

• 56:07Speaker 01

  No, no, he's showing that now too.

• 56:08Joe Rogan?

  You don't, you don't get to be that guy. You don't get to be Fire Marshal Bill unless you're out of your fucking mind.

• 56:15Speaker 01

  I'll make a lot of concession for someone's process, but when I watched that documentary about him doing the Andy Kaufman movie, and him coming into the makeup thing every day and really like, screaming and bothering the shit out of everybody, you see almost, you see Judd Hirsch's face in the documentary like, that's plenty. We're good. I get it. You have to get into your mode or whatever, but like, come on.

• 56:36Joe Rogan?

  Apparently he would go nutty if he fucked a scene up and like smashed things.

• 56:39Speaker 01

  Yeah, exactly. And it's like, this is not, that was not his personality when he was talking out of his ass cheeks. You know what I mean? Or when he was doing Vanilla Ice on In Living Color, you know what I mean? Like that's, what's that personality shift where you become a guy who's kind of like, rude to interviewers and stuff like that, like strange.

• 56:56Joe Rogan?

  Well, I think when you're trying to get into a character, there's like a thing that the, some of these guys do where they are just that guy the whole time. Like when, when, who was it that played Lincoln?

• 57:09Speaker 01

  Daniel Day-Lewis.

• 57:10Joe Rogan?

  Daniel Day-Lewis, right? Yeah. So when Daniel Day-Lewis was playing Lincoln, he was apparently Lincoln.

• 57:14Speaker 01

  Yeah, they said all day.

• 57:15Joe Rogan?

  All day long, all the time.

• 57:17Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 57:18Joe Rogan?

  So if you're playing Andy Kaufman.

• 57:19Speaker 01

  You shouldn't let him eat modern foods, then. It's catering.

• 57:22Joe Rogan?

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• 58:30Joe Rogan?

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• 59:12Joe Rogan?

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• 59:28Speaker 01

  You're mutton, Mr. Lincoln.

• 59:30Joe Rogan?

  Right, you gotta go full old school shit in a hole in the ground, sir.

• 59:34Speaker 01

  Uh, we're having Chilean sea bass. You, a bowl of gruel.

• 59:38Joe Rogan?

  Some deer jerky. Yeah, like, and no teeth, no toothbrushes.

• 59:44Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 59:44Joe Rogan?

  We haven't figured out toothbrushes yet. When did they figure out toothbrushes? That's a good question. Like, when did people start brushing their nasty fucking teeth? Imagine what breath smelled like in like the fifteen hundreds?

• 59:55Speaker 01

  My producer brings it up all the time, uh, cause he watches a lot of like period P shows like that and even like the, uh...

• 1:00:02Joe Rogan?

  Like Peaky Blinders. What are their apples smell like?

• 1:00:05Speaker 01

  They always have like attractive people in these, like the Deadwood times.

• 1:00:08Joe Rogan?

  Right, right, right.

• 1:00:08Speaker 01

  Like Deadwood, and then the girl, you know, she'll like lift her skirt up and you're like, "God, I bet it smells like a fucking murky dungeon down there." And then when she bathe, and then all they, there's no shower, so they have to just bathe in it and just hope that whatever's in there washes to the surface.

• 1:00:21Joe Rogan?

  Oh, what did people smell like back then?

• 1:00:24Speaker 01

  That's what I mean, it's like prostitutes, stuff you go, it's like, what's the best they could do?

• 1:00:28Joe Rogan?

  And by the way, they probably smelled better than the people living in the cities.

• 1:00:31Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:00:31Joe Rogan?

  The people living in the cities were all just using public outhouses. The, the cities were filled with shit from horses. It's like, oh.

• 1:00:39Speaker 01

  Coming home and kissing your wife at the end of the day is just a...

• 1:00:42Joe Rogan?

  You're, you're tracking shit everywhere. And so is your dog, and so are your cats. Everyone's tracking shit all over your house, all over your tables. There's shit everywhere.

• 1:00:51Speaker 01

  Yeah, just wooden floors with dirt all over them.

• 1:00:53Joe Rogan?

  Shit. And just little, little scabs of shit everywhere. There's just shit everywhere you go, and everyone has smallpox.

• 1:01:03Speaker 01

  That's why, uh, no one can, if your wife, if your, your husband died, you have to marry his brother.

• 1:01:08Joe Rogan?

  That's why anybody talking about the good old days, shut your stupid mouth. This is the good old days.

• 1:01:13Speaker 01

  With basic hygiene?

• 1:01:14Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, books and medicine and shit. What the fuck are you talking about? Oh, I wish I lived back in the sixteen hundreds when I died if I broke my ankle.

• 1:01:22Speaker 01

  No, but if I could have picked, uh... Uh, getting for the, so hard because like, moving backwards, you're like, well, I would take all the technology of now, of course.

• 1:01:31Joe Rogan?

  Well, you can't go anywhere. Then, then you can't make it like a hybrid deal.

• 1:01:34Speaker 01

  No, no, it's not a hybrid deal, but if I was saying, if I have to just let go of that and see what the most fun time would have been to, to be like a teenager in twenties, seventies, I think.

• 1:01:44Joe Rogan?

  Well, um.

• 1:01:45Speaker 01

  Just listening to Ambrosia, fucking, you could wear a silk shirt on ironically.

• 1:01:49Joe Rogan?

  We were all real confused.

• 1:01:51Speaker 01

  If you were chubby, no one even cared. Chubby guys got buzzy in the seventies if you had a beard.

• 1:01:55Joe Rogan?

  Did they?

• 1:01:56Speaker 01

  As long as you had a beard and some long hair.

• 1:01:57Joe Rogan?

  And you knew how to get cocaine.

• 1:01:58Speaker 01

  Yeah, and if you knew how to get cocaine. I grow a long pinky nail so people wouldn't know my house was the party spot.

• 1:02:04Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, that used to be a thing. You see a guy with a long pinky. That long pinky nail was like, oh, that guy parties. That was like, when there was a bad guy in the movie, he had a long pinky.

• 1:02:13Speaker 01

  A long pinky nail.

• 1:02:13Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:14Speaker 01

  Which is so gross.

• 1:02:15Joe Rogan?

  That's so disgusting. We think, what, what, that's how bad people want cocaine. They'll snort it off some dude's stinky fucking fingernail.

• 1:02:24Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, I went to a, I did a gig opening for Bobby Slaton, uh, years ago at the West Palm Improv, the old West Palm Improv. And, uh.

• 1:02:34Joe Rogan?

  That was a great room.

• 1:02:34Speaker 01

  The guy, yeah, the wide, shallow one.

• 1:02:36Joe Rogan?

  Great room.

• 1:02:37Speaker 01

  And, uh, I forget the name of it. Joey something was the guy who hosted. But he was like, local, local legend, this guy. And, uh, he brought us back to his, he was like, he took us to the strip club and it was like everyone knew him kind of thing.

• 1:02:53Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:02:53Speaker 01

  And then brought girls back to his house. And I am always impressed with the level of like,

• 1:03:00Speaker 01

  a person who carries their morbid obesity with like a not give a shit. And also have no give a, like, no care that the girls are gonna suck his dick or fuck him because he's got coke. Do you know what I mean? Like, I'm bad at the like fuck me for something thing. And like, but this guy, we went back to his house. I mean, his underwear and like a robe open, do you know what I mean? With all these girls around, just giving him coke and shit was wild. But he had a cabana in the back of his house. But the most interesting thing about him that I found out was the next day, he wanted to take me somewhere to eat. So he picked me up and he was a narcoleptic. And every time there was a red light, he'd fall asleep and snort.

• 1:03:40Speaker 01

  Not just fall asleep, snore.

• 1:03:42Joe Rogan?

  And he's driving?

• 1:03:43Speaker 01

  Yeah, and you have to acknowledge it, you gotta go like, "Hey, man."

• 1:03:46Joe Rogan?

  Oh my god.

• 1:03:47Speaker 01

  "Hey, okay," and he just never acknowledged it, he'd go, "Yeah, yeah, I'm good," and he'd just go, and as soon as he hit a red light,

• 1:03:53Speaker 01

  like, loud, aggressive snoring.

• 1:03:55Joe Rogan?

  Now, is he an actual narcoleptic, or does he have severe sleep apnea? Because if he's a big fat guy, he's probably never rested.

• 1:04:02Speaker 01

  Eyes closed, head goes in the shoulder.

• 1:04:04Joe Rogan?

  Out cold, instantly.

• 1:04:05Speaker 01

  Instantly.

• 1:04:06Joe Rogan?

  What is narcolepsy from? Like, do, like, healthy people have narcolepsy? Like, is there any athletes that have narcolepsy?

• 1:04:13Speaker 01

  They said Ron Jeremy was the person who had it, and...

• 1:04:16Joe Rogan?

  He's another guy, he's big and fat.

• 1:04:18Speaker 01

  Yeah, well, he one time, he was, he came to the Cellar one time with a Dennis Hoff guy.

• 1:04:22Joe Rogan?

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:04:23Speaker 01

  Which, uh, yeah, that was a guy of the people like quote-unquote celebrities who would come in that I could never pay like homage to and have like the thing was, I didn't want to meet, was like a Dennis Hoff.

• 1:04:32Joe Rogan?

  The pimp of the bunny house.

• 1:04:34Speaker 01

  Yeah, I don't know why it was so celebrated, I know it's like it's legal, but like, I still don't see his personality, he's kind of skeevy as shit.

• 1:04:40Joe Rogan?

  Well, there was a weird time where, for whatever reason, they were kind of celebrating pimps and prostitutes. Like, do you remember Pimps Up, Hoes Down?

• 1:04:51Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 1:04:52Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, I mean, that was like a famous documentary. Mr. Whitefolks, yeah.

• 1:04:56Speaker 01

  He was the best, yeah, I watched all those.

• 1:04:59Joe Rogan?

  But they were like celebrated, like, people liked, and then there was American Pimp, remember that film?

• 1:05:04Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:05:04Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:05Speaker 01

  No, it was, it wa, well, that was like the, the small window of like, pro sexuality and go be whores, girls, and then it immediately became Me Too. That's what, that happened immediately.

• 1:05:17Joe Rogan?

  Though, because it was the exploiters of those women. It wasn't like it's okay to be a prostitute. It was, it's cool to be the man who exploits all these women and gets them to go be prostitutes for him.

• 1:05:29Speaker 01

  I think it took twenty-some years for people to realize that Joe Francis was a terrible guy, you know what I mean? He was celebrated as, as hell. I just heard a Howard Stern clip the other day where he had Joe Francis on. I'm sure if you asked him about Joe Francis now, he'd be like, "What a terrible piece of shit." But when Girls Gone Wild was a thing, everyone was just like, who cares how it gets done?

• 1:05:47Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, that's crazy, right? Like, Girls Gone Wild, that's how the, when the internet wasn't around, you could buy tapes of drunk girls at the bar flashing their boobs.

• 1:05:55Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:05:55Joe Rogan?

  And you'd pay for it.

• 1:05:56Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 1:05:56Joe Rogan?

  You'd pay for it.

• 1:05:58Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:05:58Joe Rogan?

  And it had like a production value.

• 1:06:00Speaker 01

  Oh, now would you pay, you'd pay for it, and then you were part of a subscription service that...

• 1:06:04Joe Rogan?

  Is that what it was?

• 1:06:05Speaker 01

  Yeah, and then every month it would be like, Girls Gone Wild, Girls on Campus 2, and Girls Covered in Bubbles.

• 1:06:11Joe Rogan?

  Was it one of those things where they'd trick you into subscribing?

• 1:06:14Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:06:14Joe Rogan?

  Ah.

• 1:06:15Speaker 01

  It's Columbia House, like a...

• 1:06:17Joe Rogan?

  Oh, Columbia House for titties.

• 1:06:18Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:06:19Joe Rogan?

  Crazy.

• 1:06:20Speaker 01

  Oh, I've ruined, Columbia House and me have ruined the, uh, credit of my, all my pets in my life.

• 1:06:26Joe Rogan?

  Did they get in your credit? Columbia House got in your credit?

• 1:06:29Speaker 01

  No, no, I'm saying you just put, you send the penny, and you put your, you put your cat's name down, and then they just send you ten CDs.

• 1:06:35Joe Rogan?

  But it doesn't ever really affect your credit, right?

• 1:06:36Speaker 01

  What was the checks and balances on that?

• 1:06:37Joe Rogan?

  None. I always thought that that was a fluff-up scheme for the record business, where they could say they sold more records than they did.

• 1:06:44Speaker 01

  That's possible. That's actually not a bad move.

• 1:06:46Joe Rogan?

  Kind of a good move if you want to get a gold record or a platinum record. Sell as many as you can.

• 1:06:50Speaker 01

  Give you ten CDs. When it went up to a dollar, send a dollar, is where it stopped.

• 1:06:54Joe Rogan?

  Enough, guys.

• 1:06:56Speaker 01

  But a dollar...

• 1:06:56Joe Rogan?

  I'm willing to give you a penny.

• 1:06:57Speaker 01

  Yeah, to me, a dollar really was like, no, I just usually tape a penny to a postcard. But what a concept, too. Tape penny here, it said.

• 1:07:04Joe Rogan?

  It was the dumbest concept ever. You give them one penny, and if you give them one penny, they give you a bunch of CDs, and you're supposed to give them money. You're like, well, you get to pick them.

• 1:07:14Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 1:07:14Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:07:15Speaker 01

  You pick your first tip.

• 1:07:16Joe Rogan?

  AC DC.

• 1:07:17Speaker 01

  It was my, taking, it was my, before I had, uh, uh, porn magazines readily available to go into a bathroom, or anywhere where there was a bathroom where I felt I could quietly look at porn magazines, it was the TV Guide, take the TV Guide in the bathroom, do the crossword puzzle, and then pick my ten CDs for a penny. Because it was always an insert on the TV Guide.

• 1:07:36Joe Rogan?

  That's right.

• 1:07:36Speaker 01

  It was the postcard.

• 1:07:37Joe Rogan?

  Yep.

• 1:07:38Speaker 01

  Tape penny here.

• 1:07:39Joe Rogan?

  And you send it in, and all of a sudden you get cassette tapes are in the mail. Oh, boy.

• 1:07:43Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:07:44Joe Rogan?

  Oh, boy.

• 1:07:45Speaker 01

  It was so great.

• 1:07:46Joe Rogan?

  But isn't it a smart move on their part? Because it probably introduced people to a lot of music. Because if you think about it, you're only listening to the radio. The radio's only playing what they play, and they can only play so many songs, right? And if there's a hit, they're gonna play that hit over and over again. You can hear this, and there's Rolling Stones, there's Led Zeppelin, you know, you don't have a lot of time for other music.

• 1:08:06Speaker 01

  No.

• 1:08:06Joe Rogan?

  So this is a good way, even if you're giving it away to people, which mostly are. Like, what percentage, let's find this out. What percentage of people actually paid for their Columbia record and tapes?

• 1:08:18Speaker 01

  I think adults would definitely end up paying for it, because I think the deal was, you're giving them your address.

• 1:08:22Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 1:08:23Speaker 01

  So whatever the fake name you put down, they're billing.

• 1:08:25Joe Rogan?

  I don't remember them chasing me at all.

• 1:08:26Speaker 01

  I didn't feel it, but they have, but what they would do, though, is send you more. They would send you, like, I'd get, like, a CD every month that I wasn't picking.

• 1:08:36Speaker 03

  It reached its peak in 94. It accounted for 15.1% of all CD sales.

• 1:08:41Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:41Speaker 03

  It had 10 million members.

• 1:08:43Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:43Speaker 03

  If you became a member of a club, that was kind of what was happening.

• 1:08:45Joe Rogan?

  Right. What percentage of people paid them?

• 1:08:48Speaker 03

  Well, that's, I mean, it doesn't say it on here.

• 1:08:51Joe Rogan?

  But if you think about just that, that's almost like more radio, right?

• 1:08:55Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 1:08:55Joe Rogan?

  You're putting the song on the radio for free, you're sending out these cassettes, even if people don't pay, that music's getting out there, they're gonna maybe buy another Rolling Stones record or tickets to see the Rolling Stones.

• 1:09:07Speaker 01

  Well, you were- But people didn't complain about being part of Columbia House, I don't feel like, but it's like, remember when, you know, there was, like, Metallica getting furious about, like, LimeWire and Napster and those things? But it's like, it is sort of the same thing, like, you're sacrificing, but-

• 1:09:22Joe Rogan?

  But it wasn't for them.

• 1:09:23Speaker 01

  But they came from a time, though, where the money was from the recording, not touring.

• 1:09:27Joe Rogan?

  But there wasn't taking away for the money of the recording, because you couldn't, you know, like, it wasn't that many people doing it. When it became something that you could just download onto your computer, that got weird.

• 1:09:37Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 1:09:38Joe Rogan?

  And then record sales dropped off a cliff. So they were right in the wrong, but they were wrong that you can stop it. Like, you can't, you couldn't stop it.

• 1:09:45Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:09:45Joe Rogan?

  Once, like, they were trying to, like, put fingers into a broken dam. There's no way. Like, you gotta get the buck out of the way. Like, you can't, once it's on the internet, when things are on the internet, you can't say it's stealing to download it to your fans. You can't do any, you just gotta realize, oh, the world just changed.

• 1:10:01Speaker 01

  The people stay, that stand off for a while, too, like, was it Maynard? Did not want to go on a- Apple Music or Spotify or anything forever.

• 1:10:09Joe Rogan?

  I think Garth Brooks didn't either, right?

• 1:10:11Speaker 01

  Kid Rock didn't for a long time. And then a lot of them would try to go and like, I'm gonna do my own Apple Music.

• 1:10:18Joe Rogan?

  Well, did Jay-Z did that, right?

• 1:10:20Speaker 01

  Yeah, Tidal.

• 1:10:21Joe Rogan?

  Did that work?

• 1:10:22Speaker 01

  I don't, you know, it's interesting, when I talked to Kevin Hart in Montreal some years back and he was buying up, uh, he was buying up things for the LOL Network.

• 1:10:36Speaker 01

  That he was starting, which was like, I guess, an internet network. And they made all this news because when he did the pitch show, where they were pitching ideas for his network, he apparently in the room bought like four or five of them. And when I saw him that night, I was like, are these five, like five shows you saw today? They're like definite shows. And he was like, no, but it gets you press. You know what I mean? He was telling me kinda like the whole thing about it. He goes, but the idea of he was saying he was doing with that. I'm like, are you gonna run a network now? And he was like, no, you wanna build it until it becomes competitive and then another company comes along goes, can we give you money just to go away? Is the idea, you know, so the idea is like he wants like Netflix to buy.

• 1:11:14Joe Rogan?

  Oh, how weird.

• 1:11:15Speaker 01

  LOL or something like that. So it's just building it.

• 1:11:17Joe Rogan?

  Probably a good business move, but I don't, do you think like that?

• 1:11:19Speaker 01

  No, absolutely, but I think.

• 1:11:20Joe Rogan?

  Do you think like that?

• 1:11:21Speaker 01

  I have no business acumen whatsoever.

• 1:11:22Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, that's a weird business acumen to have.

• 1:11:25Speaker 01

  But I'm also.

• 1:11:26Joe Rogan?

  But it's probably effective.

• 1:11:27Speaker 01

  I'm, uh, you know, blown away by, you know, I watch you when you talk to Burt sometimes about that, about his like employment of so many people.

• 1:11:35Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:11:36Speaker 01

  And everything like, uh, which is great, he's got a great thing over there, but like, production company, I feel like the, uh, when you get a lot of money sometimes, which is impressive that you haven't done this, it's like you wanna do almost like too much like, well, now I'm a producer of things. And now it's like this or other businesses that you wanna like, start that are like outside of comedy, like is that what your thing was always? Like it was never mine, like to be like a business owner or anything or some kinda like, uh, you know, where I was, have products or something.

• 1:12:04Joe Rogan?

  I think what happens is, once guys realize the amount of money that they can make, they wanna just make more.

• 1:12:10Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 1:12:11Joe Rogan?

  And it just becomes a numbers thing. You just, you see it and you're like, oh my God, I can't believe I'm making this much money, but if I did this, then I make even more.

• 1:12:18Speaker 01

  But I'd rather give a friend, uh, like some capital to like, do their special than over, you know, I mean, unless I was taking a job and like, I'm gonna direct this and see if I can do that.

• 1:12:28Joe Rogan?

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:12:28Speaker 01

  You know, but just like the idea of, uh, Like I'm taking in like, I have to take a meeting for a sketch show that wants to be on my network today. I'm like, I don't know.

• 1:12:36Joe Rogan?

  You also, you only have so much bandwidth.

• 1:12:38Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 1:12:39Joe Rogan?

  And this is what I think people fail to think about. Like you, you, you require time to do everything. Your, your time is limited. Like you really have to think if you, oh, I could fit it in. Oh, I could do this. Oh, I could do that. Sure you can, but then there's no you time at all. And then you're running on fumes. And when there's no you time and you're running on fumes, you're not the best version of yourself.

• 1:13:00Speaker 01

  No.

• 1:13:01Joe Rogan?

  So you gotta know like where you're at. You gotta know where you're at like in terms of like your, your sanity. Like if you're working all the time, five different jobs constantly and you're never home. You sleep till fucking uh seven in the morning and then you're up gone all day and fucking going, going, going, going, going, going, going. You don't have alone time. If you don't have alone time, you don't even know how you feel about things.

• 1:13:26Speaker 01

  But you also get used to odd things. Like my alone time I look at is like the hotel, like the hotel room, just watching the bullshit that I wanna watch on YouTube. And doing it like that. It is strange when I think I wanna be like off and like uh stationary for a while. Like I feel like the day, if there's like a day here and there where it's like morning till night. I just have nothing I have to do. It's rare. But when it happens that day, I tend to not be in a great mood. I don't know why.

• 1:13:51Joe Rogan?

  Well, it's because what you do, you love and it's fun. That's the thing. Like if you're doing something all day long and it's just like business stuff and it's just for money and it's not something you love. That's a different vibe, right? That's like a hustle vibe. I'm gonna get these, get these numbers up and get this going and I'm a fucking, I'm a worker and I'm gonna grinder. I'm gonna show you because look, I got this now and then I got that now. See, I'm grinding. But as if it's a virtue. I always try to say, this is a very important thing that people need to hear.

• 1:14:20Joe Rogan?

  Just because it's hard to do, doesn't mean it's good to do. There's a lot of things that are hard to do that you don't necessarily wanna do. I don't wanna climb Mount Everest. It's hard to do, but doesn't mean it's good to do. It might be good to do for you because you need to prove to yourself that you can do this extremely difficult thing. But people are dead. There's a bunch of dead bodies up there. That's not a good thing to do.

• 1:14:40Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:14:41Joe Rogan?

  To me, in my opinion. There's a lot of stuff like that in life and just because you can do things. I'll show everybody that I work harder than everybody else like. Maybe you shouldn't.

• 1:14:50Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 1:14:51Joe Rogan?

  You need balance. You need balance in this life and that's hard to get. Once you start, when you start making money, the big fear is, what if it all goes away?

• 1:15:01Speaker 01

  Hundred percent.

• 1:15:02Joe Rogan?

  You start clutching. You start, you start having famine instincts. Like, oh my god, what if it all goes away? So then you start doing things that you think will ensure that it doesn't go away.

• 1:15:12Speaker 01

  Well, it's that feeling of you feel like you're running a scam.

• 1:15:14Joe Rogan?

  Yes.

• 1:15:15Speaker 01

  Cause also it's something, especially with stand up, putting a price on things is so strange when you're like, well, I've done it for, more than anything, I've done it for free.

• 1:15:24Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:15:25Speaker 01

  Then, uh, second most, I've done it for pennies. You know what I mean? So it's like the same, it's interesting to be like, well, I've done the same job for fifty dollars that I've done for a hundred thousand dollars. You know what I mean? Like it's strange, like, uh, it's a strange place to be and so, uh,

• 1:15:41Joe Rogan?

  But it's because?

• 1:15:41Speaker 01

  And you do feel like, well, what's, what's it gonna take until I'm back to like, you know, hey, wanna come do a hundred dollars? I still get affected and it's just young comics being young comics. I don't mind it, but like, as long as I've been doing it, I know they just want you to come do their show, but they're like, hey man, I do it Tuesdays at the, you know, at the stand at six PM. Like, uh, Lev can back, can throw you a hundred bucks and stuff like that. You're like, why do you think I'm gonna come to, and why are you naming the money? Like, if you just had me do the show, I'd be less hurt if you were like, I got a hundred bucks for you too. Like, great. Like, that feels weird.

• 1:16:15Joe Rogan?

  They're kids.

• 1:16:16Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:16:16Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, right. And when you're a kid, a hundred bucks is real, so it's real to him.

• 1:16:20Speaker 01

  Oh shit. Things I've done for a hundred bucks?

• 1:16:23Joe Rogan?

  So it's like real money. It's like, oh, a hundred dollar gig in town? Great.

• 1:16:27Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:16:27Joe Rogan?

  And so he doesn't know any better yet.

• 1:16:29Speaker 01

  No, no, for sure. And like I said, I'm not insulted that they, they want you on the show. That's great. It's just the idea that you're like, a hundred dollars, they're gonna sell me, dude? Don't say that.

• 1:16:39Joe Rogan?

  Well, I think he's just letting you know he'll give you something. And so you're like, oh, great. I'll go down there.

• 1:16:44Speaker 01

  No, I say, I never, I never write back. Like, I mean, that would be, I'm not like that with young comics though at all. I'm so bad at like, uh, it's my, the tough time I have with Kill Tony. I love doing it and I always have a great time, but like, the initial, like, just going at somebody, like, I feel like, especially if I wanna come out of the gates and make fun of them, I almost have to have the look over of like, I'm just fucking around. It's like, I know it's so difficult what you're doing right now. A minute of comedy under the stress of how big that show is now is,

• 1:17:10Joe Rogan?

  And for some of them, it's the first time they've ever gone on stage. So we're seeing guys, the first time they ever went on stage, they went on stage in Madison Square Garden.

• 1:17:18Speaker 01

  Yeah, that's fucking crazy.

• 1:17:23Joe Rogan?

  16,000 people and they followed dice. Like, what are you talking about?

• 1:17:27Speaker 01

  Look at your phone for notes. Hang on Madison Square Garden.

• 1:17:31Joe Rogan?

  You barely can get to the one minute mark. What you practice in the mirror is just, everything's falling apart.

• 1:17:37Speaker 01

  Oh yeah, the running out of time, that was the funniest.

• 1:17:40Joe Rogan?

  Woo!

• 1:17:41Speaker 01

  Like, well, this is three minutes of material, or 30 seconds if it doesn't go the way I think.

• 1:17:45Joe Rogan?

  Cricket, cricket, Jesus, panic.

• 1:17:47Speaker 01

  Isn't that the biggest, uh...

• 1:17:50Joe Rogan?

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• 1:18:32Joe Rogan?

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• 1:19:14Joe Rogan?

  for gut stuff, immunity, metabolism, etc. I first noticed it working around training, especially workout recovery. Most stuff falls off, but I am still taking this. If you want to try, Armra is offering my listeners 30% off. Go to armra.com/rogan.

• 1:19:32Speaker 01

  Me, I felt like the biggest milestone in comedy, the action of it, I mean, was not being afraid of quiet. With the crowd being dead silent, even if I said something that I thought was funny and they're still dead silent and that not being like frazzling, you know, I don't get shaken by that.

• 1:19:48Joe Rogan?

  That's confidence from a lot of big sets, a lot of sets where you killed, so you're like, I know I'm good.

• 1:19:53Speaker 01

  Well, that's what it is, it has to believe, I think it's like, I haven't, it's also like, I haven't conveyed it right then.

• 1:19:59Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:20:00Speaker 01

  Like, it's me, probably, but like, they're not just getting what I'm thinking, if they, if they just saw my thoughts right now, they'd get how funny this is.

• 1:20:07Joe Rogan?

  Well, here's the thing too, the, you know, you're gonna run into a jazz crowd every now and then, you know?

• 1:20:13Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 1:20:14Joe Rogan?

  Like, when you go to see music, you go to see a band, you go to see rock and roll, you go to whatever club you're gonna go, you go to the Whisky, it's a rock band. You know, we know, we're gonna go see this blues guy, we're gonna go see a country guy, you go see comedy, you could get Taylor Swift, you could get ACDC, you could get anything, you can get all kinds of shit, you can get the Pixies, you can get all kinds of shit when you go see comedy. It's, there's so many different styles, to call it one thing is kinda weird. And you could, you could be a rock and roll guy and you're on stage in front of a jazz crowd.

• 1:20:45Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:20:46Joe Rogan?

  And they don't want your bullshit, they don't like how loud you're being, why are you moving so much?

• 1:20:50Speaker 01

  No, it's what.

• 1:20:50Joe Rogan?

  We're here to snicker.

• 1:20:52Speaker 01

  You know, I, I stopped putting in at one point for the, the small room at the stand when I was in town for the weekends. Because, and this is no fault of theirs, I know they're just booking me because I'm home and they want me on the shows that I can do. But they would put those shows, they would book the, um, like the TikTok, like, celebrity girls, like, girl comics that were like, brand new. In comedy, but drew the audience, and they were, and they're also young enough in comedy that they're posting their spots.

• 1:21:22Joe Rogan?

  Oh, my god.

• 1:21:23Speaker 01

  Do you know what I mean, like, if you wanna see, my schedule is like, here, so the room's filling up for them. And I'd go up, I mean, the second I'd get on stage, you'd see the face and groans of like, just like, oh, a man's gonna come, what, lay it out now? And I would even try to play with that idea, do you know what I mean, like, explain what's going on in the room, and they would just. And then my last one ever doing up there, there was an Asian girl in the front row that I was uh, fucking with, like going back and forth with her, but she was great. She was like into it. She was laughing and she was busting balls back a little bit, which was fine, you know, showed me she was kind of like playing around with it. And then, uh, I see another girl, you know, 22 years old or whatever, 23 going into her phone.

• 1:22:07Speaker 01

  And I was like, oh, I lost you already. I go, I lost you. And she goes, uh, maybe it has something to do with the Asian girl thing. And I was like, what? He goes, you called her Asian girl. I was like, wait, but she's fine. I go, are you, you're getting upset on her behalf and she's fine? And she was like, yeah. And I was like, that's retarded. And then a lady in the back of the room stood up, lady, a girl, and literally clutched her jacket together and went, you just said the R word. And I went, the manager was in the room and I was like, can you take me off the schedule for the rest of this weekend up here? I go, I'm not even mad at this crowd. I'm like, they, you have to give this crowd what they want. If you put on a three week open mic gay comic up here right now, he'd murder.

• 1:22:53Speaker 01

  Like read the room of what you're booking. You know what I mean? It's like, you have to see what's happening. It's like, you're putting me up there. This isn't fun for me and it's not fair to that. Like, they've been sold a show that's not what I do.

• 1:23:03Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 1:23:03Speaker 01

  So I don't have any kind of like gripe on them. Just like, don't put me on those shows.

• 1:23:06Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, you shouldn't be on that show.

• 1:23:08Speaker 01

  Look, those people enjoy, you're fucking up, your audience is actually gonna like the club less because they think I'm the piece of shit that's always here.

• 1:23:15Joe Rogan?

  But then there's another argument where you gotta kind of do all kinds of crowds.

• 1:23:20Speaker 01

  Of course.

• 1:23:20Joe Rogan?

  Cause if you only do your own crowd, like one of the things that happens to guys is they start doing theaters and they do real well and then they bring a lame opening act and then they're only playing to their crowd.

• 1:23:31Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:23:32Joe Rogan?

  And you see the drop off. You see this like weird creativity drop off. You see the weird impact and not killing is hard. Everything's a little fake and forced. And it's, it's pretty noticeable and normal. It's like normal. It happens a lot. If you're not doing clubs.

• 1:23:46Speaker 01

  Well, I was gonna say, if you're in theaters, you're removed from the audience.

• 1:23:48Joe Rogan?

  You gotta mix it up. You have to be doing little, little rooms sometimes. I think it's like, if you're an athlete, you have to lift weights. You know what I mean? I think there's, there's something to that.

• 1:23:57Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah. I like to go, uh, do crowds that aren't my crowds plenty. You know what I mean? I mean, uh.

• 1:24:03Joe Rogan?

  But I mean, just different sizes too, right?

• 1:24:06Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, without a doubt.

• 1:24:07Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. Sometimes like, one of the great things about the store was like, you could come in there on an off night, like a Tuesday night and do like a 1 a.m. set. And when you're doing a 1 a.m. set, there's like 25 fucking people in the room. And you, you just like, you get to, and they've seen everything. They've seen five hours of fucking stand-up. They came from Kansas. They've seen five hours of comedy and most of the audience is gone.

• 1:24:30Speaker 01

  It's a shame, from a comics perspective, I mean, from a business perspective, it's great, but like the Comedy Cellar, like it's funny for people to not even know anymore or remember. There was a time when I got into the Comedy Cellar, there was still, when you went on at 2 o'clock in the morning, there could be 15 people in the audience.

• 1:24:45Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 1:24:46Speaker 01

  Now it's, show lets people out, another show, another show. So it's like, it's, uh, it's always sold out and packed. But like, uh, there was something to that. That was kinda like, that was the training ground. I go up after Dave Attell almost every night of the week in front of 15 people was like, that was great training. You do need that for sure. And you, and I still need that. It's, it's not so much that, I'm just saying, I said, take me out of that room because it's always this audience and it's just like, you're putting them through a thing they don't need to be put through.

• 1:25:14Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 1:25:14Speaker 01

  I'll go downstairs. But downstairs isn't my audience either. I'm just like, just put me in the room where it's not been sold as this one thing.

• 1:25:21Joe Rogan?

  Right. Well, that's, that's a problem with like some clubs that have restrictions on what you could say on the stage. Like, why? No, no, no. You just can't book this guy.

• 1:25:30Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:25:31Joe Rogan?

  Like, there's a club, where is it? And is it in Portland or Seattle? There's some club that these guys got to, Duncan got to, and he sent me a photo of a list of all the things that you can't talk about. We don't tolerate, at this club, we don't tolerate racism, sexism, transphobia. Like, okay.

• 1:25:48Speaker 01

  I wonder if it's the one that, uh...

• 1:25:50Joe Rogan?

  I don't know what it is. We don't, probably don't even say, need to say the name.

• 1:25:53Speaker 01

  Oh, I don't know the name of the, I don't know the name of the place, but there was a.

• 1:25:56Joe Rogan?

  But just don't book people that you know what the fuck they do. And don't book anybody that's not you. If you have a specific crowd you're trying to cater to, that's your prerogative. No problem with that.

• 1:26:09Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 1:26:10Joe Rogan?

  Book the comedians that fit. Don't, don't like have a list of shit someone can't say once they get there.

• 1:26:16Speaker 01

  Also, assume that if you're booking somebody though, that you'd have to put those rules for it's like, you have to like, I always like that thing. It's like, trust the comic to be like a professional. Not that they'll always come through in that regard, but like, you know, you could, you can put me on stage anywhere and assume it's not going to end with me being like a fuck you, fuck you with the audience. You know what I mean? Like, we'll get out of it.

• 1:26:36Joe Rogan?

  Right, you'll have fun.

• 1:26:37Speaker 01

  Relatively pleasant.

• 1:26:38Joe Rogan?

  Well, you're a guy that's very flexible on stage, which is just a huge benefit. You can always fuck around with people and, and engage with the crowd. Like, you're so good at it. You're one of the best in the business at it, for sure. You're really good at it. But it's also fun and jovial. You know how to tie it all together. That's a giant skill if you're doing a bunch of different kinds of rooms and different kinds of places, but when, when a club owner or someone says that you can't breach certain topics, because that's what you're saying. If you're saying, we don't tolerate racism. Listen, I don't either, but that's not what jokes are. And there's a way to touch on race that a super ultra sensitive person would say is racism.

• 1:27:19Joe Rogan?

  And another person who's more objective would say, no, this is just making fun of the differences we all have. And how crazy it is that we would think that any one is superior to the others. There's ways to do that. And to say that, you know, that's racist, we don't tolerate racism. Like, well, what do you, what do you call it? So you can't just define what the, you can't define hate speech. Because that's your definition. You force me to go with your definition?

• 1:27:45Speaker 01

  Yeah, can't be opinion based.

• 1:27:47Joe Rogan?

  It can't. So you just gotta let people speak freely and then you decide who you book or don't book. But know what the fuck they do. That's part of your job. Part of your job as someone who books a fucking theater is, okay, if you have a theater, you own the theater. You don't want anybody come performing that doesn't meet your expectations. That's great.

• 1:28:07Speaker 01

  One of the funniest things is, I'm always blown away by, is the people in the audience who. Or hating the show, which is fine, that happens, you know, some people come and they didn't know what they were coming. Usually girlfriends. Sure. Girlfriends get dragged. Yeah. Podcast fan. Which I also tend to like, take their side. If I see that happening, I try to do that. I'm like, why do you make you come, you know? Why do you put you through this kind of thing? Yeah. Is uh, is how I will usually approach that. But when you see those faces, when they, if someone like that gets shitty, and stuff, it's, I'm always surprised how aggressive they are when they realize that they're the, the minority. Right. You know what I mean? It's like, I don't know, cause you're, you suck and you're not funny. It's such a funny thing to shift.

• 1:28:49Speaker 01

  How much you can make that person an enemy of the room by just going, she's saying all of you are stupid as shit, because you're laughing at it. Then this, they'll hate her for you. Well, there's always gonna be a you suck and you're not funny person in the world. Yeah, well, that's a skill you have to get. That poor girl, that poor girl in a, that had the video of her skittin' out on the guy in the audience. Oh, yeah. That was, that was unfortunate. People piled on on her, which was actually fucked up. Wow. She was getting like death threat, I mean, why would you death threaten someone who had a bad time on stage? It seems weird, but she, but again, that's the, that's the situation of, um, getting an audience,

• 1:29:28Speaker 01

  uh, before you're ready to handle all situations. Cause the, the thing about that was the heckle in that video is, uh, I mean, heckling 101, like the thing you should be able to handle is someone going, you're not funny. Right. I'm funny. You want me to tell the joke? Like, give me the microphone. This is all like, I said, these are the lobs they'd throw you at a pitching prac-, you know, batting practice to fucking do crowd work. It's day one of karate class. They're saying you suck and you're not funny. Like, come on. You know, right away, you could see him. He's right in the front. Yeah. Like, you could pick him apart visually, or ask him a few questions, make him look dumb. There's just ways to, but, she wasn't composed, because she was leaning into that with like, well, I got this whole crowd behind me, but it just looks like a lunatic. Like, when she put it out to the world, everyone's like, you're crazy, and this crowd's-

• 1:30:13Speaker 01

  She put it out herself? Yes. That's the only reason I thought it was fair to talk about it at all. Yeah. Well, you know. If it was someone filming her and being like, look at this dumb bitch or something, I, I would be, I don't know if I would have went at it, cause I'd be like, I would, if I had talked about it, I would be like, it's fucked up that somebody did that. Like, you're posting her fucking, although, that said, I mean, I've watched Pablo Francisco fall off stage 7,000 times.

• 1:30:36Speaker 01

  What's that? What's that, sir? What's that, sir?

• 1:30:40Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, I've seen that too. Poor Pablo. Funny dude though.

• 1:30:44Speaker 01

  So funny.

• 1:30:44Joe Rogan?

  Funny motherfucker. Um, yeah, man, the thing about that girl is like,

• 1:30:50Joe Rogan?

  she ran into all of the fuck you, you're not funny people in the world. Like, see, if you have a crowd of 200 people and you got one fuck you, you're not funny girl, that's one thing, but if you scale that out to the entire internet, that is so many fuck you, you're not funny people, and those are the ones who are gonna comment. You know, there's plenty of people that saw that video, like you and me, who were like, oh, god. But you didn't comment.

• 1:31:14Speaker 01

  No.

• 1:31:15Joe Rogan?

  So who's commenting? The fuck you, you're not funny people.

• 1:31:18Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:31:18Joe Rogan?

  So when there's 30 million people seeing a video, you're gonna get 13,000 plus fuck you, you're not funny people who post constantly. So he's gonna post 10, 15 times, they're gonna be arguing with people in the comments, telling you how you should kill yourself.

• 1:31:32Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:31:32Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, you gotta hide. You can't, and most people don't. Most people go online and they read all the things, like, oh, my god, what are they saying about me? You gotta just get offline.

• 1:31:42Speaker 01

  Well, then there was another, uh, I think an Asian girl doing an open mic who they had a video of her like throwing shit around and smashing stuff.

• 1:31:48Joe Rogan?

  Well, she's fighting the patriarchy. So let her, let her lash out.

• 1:31:52Speaker 01

  But just, I almost wonder, remember that was the fear, they were like, people try to create viral moments, so heckling will become, like, people go to comedy clubs, like, I'm gonna heckle and make a moment.

• 1:32:01Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:32:02Speaker 01

  It's also a thing about, like, comics that are just trying to find a, uh, like, a lose their shit moment on stage also.

• 1:32:08Joe Rogan?

  Oh, wow.

• 1:32:08Speaker 01

  You know what I mean?

• 1:32:09Joe Rogan?

  You think so?

• 1:32:10Speaker 01

  Yeah, with like, look at, not even for a thing, not trying to not keep it funny, but like, let me,

• 1:32:14Joe Rogan?

  Let me go viral?

• 1:32:15Speaker 01

  Go at somebody, like, really hard, you know what I mean?

• 1:32:17Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, so, well, also, some people are just socially retarded, and they think they're really good at it, and they're just not. They're not really good at communicating, they think they are, and then they're screaming at the fucking, fucking, ah!

• 1:32:28Speaker 01

  Fake anger is hilarious.

• 1:32:30Joe Rogan?

  Fake anger's the best.

• 1:32:31Speaker 01

  Especially when it's a joke that's been told for like 10 years, and you're like, you can't be pissed about this.

• 1:32:35Joe Rogan?

  You know what the craziest viral moment was, uh, ever in comedy? Heather McDonald making jokes about vaccines and then blacking out. Blacking out and banging her head. I only say this because she's okay, but I think she cracked her skull. I think she fractured her skull. I mean, her head fucking bounces off that hard stage. And it looked to the audience like this was like a pratfall.

• 1:32:56Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:32:56Joe Rogan?

  This is a part of the bit. The timing was so good that it looked like a bit.

• 1:33:00Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:33:01Joe Rogan?

  They were laughing and then they were like, oh, oh, my God. She really did just blackout.

• 1:33:07Speaker 01

  Yeah, they almost laughed for a second like, okay, Heather. That's plenty. That's good.

• 1:33:11Joe Rogan?

  Historians will study that video. They will not believe, it might be proof of the simulation. That video might be proof of the simulation. Because it just doesn't make sense. It's like unless God has some amazing sense of humor. Some amazing sense of humor.

• 1:33:27Speaker 01

  That's a good, uh, my favorite, my favorite, uh, stage moment on, it's still that classic. This is before YouTube and stuff. The, the look at these biceps guy at the Boston Comedy Club. Did you ever see that?

• 1:33:40Joe Rogan?

  No, what happened?

• 1:33:41Speaker 01

  It's, it's an open mic. He's definitely, you find out through the video, he's getting heckled by a, a girl who also went on stage. But she did well, you know, she has her friends there clearly. And, uh, so she did well and this guy's just like, his comedy is all written. He came out of the gates, you know, when you kind of fake alpha on stage right away.

• 1:34:01Joe Rogan?

  Oh, no.

• 1:34:02Speaker 01

  So he's just, he's got these jokes. It's like one's like a racist joke. Uh, he tells at one point and it's just his whole personality is just, he gives off a bad vibe for sure. So he sucks and this girl in the audience sucks. And when he can't take anymore of her heckling, he just goes, he says something about, you can't even get a girl. He goes, you think I can't get a girl? Look at these biceps. And it's so, it's such a break and he means it. He, if you look up, look at these biceps, you'll find it pretty easily.

• 1:34:29Joe Rogan?

  That's all it took?

• 1:34:30Speaker 01

  It's so old, but this is the old Boston Comedy Club in the Village.

• 1:34:33Joe Rogan?

  Oh, that's funny. That place was great.

• 1:34:35Speaker 01

  Place was, yeah.

• 1:34:36Joe Rogan?

  This guy?

• 1:34:36Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:34:37Joe Rogan?

  Oh, he looks crazy.

• 1:34:38Speaker 05

  Look at my girl. Look at my fucking biceps. You think I can't meet a girl?

• 1:34:48Speaker 05

  Oh my god. Anyway, uh, before I snap and start drawing stools all over the place, I'm gonna give you thanks.

• 1:34:54Joe Rogan?

  Ooh. What year is that from? It looks like the 90s.

• 1:34:57Speaker 03

  Yeah. I found this, it's over 10 years old, so it's...

• 1:35:00Speaker 01

  It's, uh, it's, it's late 90s, early 2000s.

• 1:35:02Joe Rogan?

  An Android phone from the 90s?

• 1:35:04Speaker 01

  Actually, no, it wasn't. It was 2000s, because it was called Comedy Village at that point, still they changed the name.

• 1:35:09Joe Rogan?

  Oh.

• 1:35:09Speaker 01

  So it was the, uh, early 2000s.

• 1:35:11Joe Rogan?

  So that's the old Boston Comedy Club?

• 1:35:12Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:35:13Joe Rogan?

  Wow.

• 1:35:14Speaker 01

  You can see the mantle.

• 1:35:15Joe Rogan?

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• 1:35:56Joe Rogan?

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• 1:36:40Joe Rogan?

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• 1:37:22Joe Rogan?

  And isn't getting more time with our four-legged best friends, something every dog owner wants? The answer to that is yes, obviously. So, try The Farmer's Dog today and get 50% off your first box of fresh, healthy food. Plus, get free shipping. Just go to thefarmersdog.com/rogan. This offer is for new customers only. I was working in that place back when Neil Brennan was a door guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I became friends with Neil when he was a door guy. It's hilarious. Kevin was already rolling?

• 1:37:57Joe Rogan?

  Kevin Brennan? I don't know. Uh, Kevin Brennan was, yeah, he was around then. I think he was already doing stand-up. Well, Kevin was the first one. Yeah. To do stand-up. Oh, for sure. Yeah, he was definitely way before Neil. And then Neil, yeah, yeah, yeah. That place was a great club. That's where the first club I started at, too. What a great little club that was. The Barry Katz, uh, all the clients worked there. Were you a Barry Katz client ever? No, never. Steer clear? I've been, no, I've just been with the same manager since I was an open mic'er. No shit? Yeah. Wow. Back in Boston. Well, he found me in Boston. He was a New York guy. That's why I moved to New York. No shit? Yeah, I wasn't even supposed to go on stage that night. Oh, so lucky, because I would have panicked. I would have choked. Uh, I didn't know he was in the room. I had no idea. So, he had come, he was, he used to manage Bob Nelson. Remember Bob Nelson? Yeah. Hell, yeah. So, Bob Nelson, uh-

• 1:38:42Joe Rogan?

  It's Philly guy, I believe. He became very Christian. And he was gonna have his, his Bible partner, his, his guy become his manager. He had this guy that, they were brothers in Christ. Oh, geez. And so, Sussman was looking for new clients and he thought he saw everybody that, that he could see in New York at the time. And so, he had a good friend, uh, that was taking a trip to Boston, and so he went with him. And he said, "I'm gonna, you know, set up some, uh, shows at some of these comedy clubs." So, they had all the lo- local Boston headliners, like, big-name guys from the town would all perform for him. And um, I was working driving limos at the time and uh, I I while I was driving, I would come up with some of my best ideas sometimes. Because you know, you didn't listen to the radio, just drive.

• 1:39:28Joe Rogan?

  Because you you couldn't listen to the radio while you had clients.

• 1:39:30Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:39:30Joe Rogan?

  And so some of my best ideas came from just driving around. I had this fucking idea. I'm like, oh my god, I think this would work. And so I called up my friend who was the manager. And I said, hey dude, do you think I could get a guest spot tonight? And he's like, yeah, absolutely. So he hooks me up. I have no idea. I go downstairs. This guy who's becomes my manager is walking out of the room to go to another club, which is down the street. And he hears me killing. And so he comes back downstairs and he watches my whole set. And I would have never done what I did.

• 1:40:01Speaker 01

  How long you doing comedy at this point?

• 1:40:04Joe Rogan?

  Three years.

• 1:40:05Speaker 01

  That's fast.

• 1:40:06Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, three years. So um, but I was pretty, I had some good sex jokes. I had some great jokes that would kill. And I would have never done them if he was in the room. Oh, because everybody had to be clean back then. That was like, you gotta be clean, you gotta be clean. And I was like.

• 1:40:22Speaker 01

  You had good success in like acting. Was that your, when you got into it was, I I know when I got into it, what I thought was interesting. Was I started to do stand up comedy. It took me a long time to realize that I love broadcasting. I think it scratches the same itch for me. Uh, broadcasting is whatever. I didn't, never got into it to act. Or all these different other things. So but as soon as you get into it. Especially when you have a manager, you just see the industry unfold. You see everyone's like, you don't have a commercial agent? You gotta go out and audition for commercials. All these things that I was like supplementary. That I was like, yeah, instead of doing that, I'm just gonna keep doing the black circuit because I make some money there. Like I was getting a couple bucks. You know, enough to survive uh, on shows and that. And then I'll just go hang out the mainstream.

• 1:41:04Speaker 01

  Rooms, you know, at night and meet all the comics and get on when I can get on. But like, it was never a. I I just never like I would not go so many times to Audemars, I don't fucking.

• 1:41:13Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, I did a couple of those.

• 1:41:14Speaker 01

  I don't want it, and I ended up sitting on this show for two years. It was a great experience in hindsight, but like.

• 1:41:19Joe Rogan?

  What show did you go on?

• 1:41:20Speaker 01

  It's called Z-Rock. It was a IFC show. What was great about it for me was because uh it was like Curb Your Enthusiasm style writing. So we got to say whatever we wanted, really. And it was cursing and there was no problems with that. So it was a very fun show to do in that regard, but it's good, it just wasn't my.

• 1:41:37Joe Rogan?

  Wasn't your thing?

• 1:41:37Speaker 01

  In fact, when I uh, when I was doing it, I would still go like three of the nights a week. We do five shows. Every other night I would still go do my spot at the cellar and she was giving me two AM spots. And I have to be on set at seven AM, you know, six AM sometimes. And when they would get like, you know, I would take naps in between like scenes or whatever. And they would be like, why are you going and doing like standup so late? I'm like, oh, because this show will not be forever. And there is fifty people waiting to jump in my spot there. Yeah, I mean, I'm a staffed there right now, so it's like, I, when this goes away, that's the thing that's still gonna be there. And so I I definitely made sure, as I said, but also I didn't want to really be an actor.

• 1:42:18Joe Rogan?

  Well, in the nineties, it was just a money thing. You know, it was uh, everybody, there was two things that everybody wanted. As if you were a comic.

• 1:42:27Speaker 01

  A deal.

• 1:42:28Joe Rogan?

  No, you wanted to be the head of a sitcom or you wanted to host The Tonight Show. Those are the two things that everybody wanted, which is why Jay Leno, people to this day don't understand, like, why did Jay Leno want The Tonight Show so bad that he was like hiding in the closet and you know that whole story where they're negotiating?

• 1:42:42Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:42:43Joe Rogan?

  And, you know, he just, they scratched and clawed and everybody was mad at him because he took it from Conan. Remember that? Like, because he went back because Conan's ratings weren't as good. That all that craziness was, that was the golden carrot at the end of the stick. Everybody, like, so in our minds, everybody wanted to host The Tonight Show or you wanted to be Jerry Seinfeld. So that was what you got. Like, and so these people came there and that's all the industry talked about because that's where all the money was. That's what your agent wanted you to do. That's where all the money was. And everybody was just pushing you in that direction.

• 1:43:14Speaker 01

  Well, yeah, that's what it is. It was like, it was a push in that direction because it was like, you're, but it's an antiquated idea that comes from the time. Of like, uh, everyone in entertainment was like a triple threat. I watched something a while ago that was a-

• 1:43:27Joe Rogan?

  Like a Jamie Foxx.

• 1:43:28Speaker 01

  How, but you're right, but even go back to like, the Sinatra's and they said Barney Miller, Hal Linden, there's videos of him like, singing on, he went on like talk shows and as a singer.

• 1:43:39Joe Rogan?

  Wow.

• 1:43:40Speaker 01

  But because everyone had to like dance, you were like a showman.

• 1:43:42Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 1:43:42Speaker 01

  There was no like, uh,

• 1:43:44Joe Rogan?

  From the olden days.

• 1:43:44Speaker 01

  In one direction. Yeah, so the idea-

• 1:43:46Joe Rogan?

  Catskills.

• 1:43:47Speaker 01

  The idea that you were like, I, I came into comedy as a mega fan of stand-up comedy. I loved all of it. I didn't even like draw lines on, you know, there's people I liked more than others and Dice was my guy for sure when I was 12, 13. I just hit him at the right time.

• 1:44:02Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:44:03Speaker 01

  That I loved that, but I was such a fan of stand-up that when I got into stand-up, I only saw like, now I didn't know what the path was to selling out comedy clubs or theaters or anything like that. But that's all it was. I didn't get into this and I was like, oh, and then I'll have a sitcom and then you just get told right away like,

• 1:44:19Joe Rogan?

  Well, what year did you come along?

• 1:44:20Speaker 01

  You're going-

• 1:44:20Joe Rogan?

  What year did you come along?

• 1:44:21Speaker 01

  I started in ninety, uh, ninety-seven.

• 1:44:26Joe Rogan?

  Okay, so-

• 1:44:26Speaker 01

  Almost nine, maybe ninety-eight.

• 1:44:27Joe Rogan?

  That was like the peak of the sitcom days. That was Friends, that was Sein- that was everything was still on the air back then, right? Seinfeld had, when, what year did Seinfeld end? I wanna say that was like two thousand, no, ninety-eight?

• 1:44:43Speaker 01

  Yeah, I was gonna say ninety's ended.

• 1:44:45Joe Rogan?

  Ninety-eight?

• 1:44:49Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. Yeah. Okay, and then there's Friends, which kept going a little while longer, right?

• 1:44:57Joe Rogan?

  You know, and then there was like Caroline and the City, there was like all these shows that everybody was like, that was the goal. The goal was to get on a show and everybody wanted, and everybody got a network deal and they were handing out deals. Well, you would get like a couple hundred grand, you didn't have to do anything and they never even made a show and then you'd get another deal next year. There was a bunch of guys who were always having deals.

• 1:45:16Speaker 01

  And that, a lot of those people, when I got into comedy, I'd see those people like, chest out at the comic strip.

• 1:45:23Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:45:23Speaker 01

  And stuff, but then, but then- Never heard of it again, not to, I mean, I wouldn't name names, but I mean, it was just weird to see people that were like, oh, they just got their second deal with NBC, holding deal or.

• 1:45:34Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, oh, they were convinced it was gonna go. They would tell you, like, I got a million dollar backup deal and this and that, and so they have to do my show. It's gonna be on the air. You should play my brother.

• 1:45:42Speaker 01

  And then it doesn't. It's such a, uh.

• 1:45:44Joe Rogan?

  Well, you see people getting really weird and acting like they're special before they're even famous.

• 1:45:50Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 1:45:50Joe Rogan?

  Like, you didn't, you didn't even get on the launching pad yet, and you're already acting like a fucking crazy person. I saw a lot of that.

• 1:45:55Speaker 01

  I saw, I, I've been doing it long enough to see people kinda go and be like, shit, the acting thing seems to be going. And I'm gonna go to LA or something in, in entertainment, like, besides stand-up is going. And they focus on that for a couple of years, and then nothing really pans out from it, and they didn't keep doing stand-up.

• 1:46:13Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 1:46:13Speaker 01

  And then they come back, and it's like.

• 1:46:14Joe Rogan?

  And then they try again.

• 1:46:15Speaker 01

  And then they're confused because I've never had my own sitcom, I've never had anything, but like, uh, one thing I never stopped doing was like, working the whole time still.

• 1:46:24Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:46:24Speaker 01

  So it's like, you're building a fan base still. And when people, a lot of people left at a time where it was like, oh, this is where you have to start, you know, they went to go to acting when everyone was like, alright, this is, it's podcast times now, and social media times, and you have to get all these things going. Um, and you connect with the audience and stuff and keep performing, and like, they went away and then come back, and it's hard to start again.

• 1:46:45Joe Rogan?

  It's real hard. They saw a lot of guys during the writer's strike try to do it again. Cause there's a few of those guys that are really good, that are just writers. And they become, they become trapped in that velvet prison of getting that, you know, you, you make good money. You got a great health plan, you know, you got a nice house, got a mortgage, maybe started having kids, and you're not really a comic anymore. Now you're working on a sitcom, or you're writing. And the problem is, you don't have a backup plan anymore, because you can't just go on the road anymore, because you don't have a fucking audience.

• 1:47:16Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:47:17Joe Rogan?

  So all those other guys that you came up with that kept their comedy up during that whole time, those guys can still tour. Like Fitzsimmons was very smart about it. Like Fitzsimmons did a lot of writing gigs, but he never stopped doing stand-up.

• 1:47:29Speaker 01

  He's so funny.

• 1:47:29Joe Rogan?

  Never stopped doing stand-up, and he always kept getting better. And so like, when writer's strikes and things like that happen. Greg's fine, like he sells out all over the country. He doesn't have to worry about it, but it's because he's smart and because he like saw the writing on the wall like I'm not falling into this trap.

• 1:47:45Speaker 01

  Well, it's a matter of what you want to do. When you woke up in the mornings to go do news radio, were you like thrilled going to work every day or did it? Was it did it?

• 1:47:53Joe Rogan?

  No, news radio was really fun. It was really fun.

• 1:47:57Speaker 01

  The cast is crazy.

• 1:47:58Joe Rogan?

  It was really fun. It was a it was a real fun like environment. We had a good time. The writers were amazing. It was like per perfect best case scenario for a sitcom. And it was the second sitcom I was on. The first one I was on was like worst case scenario, not worst, but started off great. It was on the show called Hardball with Jim Brewer. Jim Brewer was, he played one of the rival mascots and he gets beat up. Jim was so funny. It was so funny. It was a real funny pilot and it was written by these guys who worked on Married with Children and they worked on The Simpsons. They were really funny writers, Jeff Martin and Kevin Curran. And these guys put together this really funny show.

• 1:48:40Joe Rogan?

  And then the networks just hacked it up. They just, they just jizzed into the soup. It was a mess. They brought in a bunch of people that shouldn't have been there and a bunch of and the show fell apart. And but I got I got to watch like these brilliant, really funny guys get their work just shit all over by the network and have it fall apart and become a just a joke.

• 1:49:02Speaker 01

  Could you have been roped into stopping stand up? Like not doing stand up to go in the full time?

• 1:49:09Joe Rogan?

  No, no, no, no.

• 1:49:10Speaker 01

  From sitcom to sitcom?

• 1:49:11Joe Rogan?

  But one thing that I did do for sure is I neglected my stand up for a few years. When I was doing news radio all the time, the problem was in news radio in the early days, they were really long hours. Because we were trying to figure the show out and you know, there was a lot of network notes back in those days and you know, the network was really behind it, but it wasn't. It wasn't owned by NBC. It was it was produced by Brillstein Gray. So you know, if you wanted to be on the good slots. Right? So what Paul Sims would call, Paul Sims is the creator of news radio, called the shit sandwich. So you'd have Friends and Married with Children and in between you'd have like kind of cocker sitcoms, it's like a shit sandwich. We got in those spots occasionally and every time we did, we were like number two in the country,

• 1:49:56Joe Rogan?

  number three or something, but then we dropped down like number 80 because we got moved like nine different times over five years, nine times over five years. So the show didn't really become successful until it went into syndication.

• 1:50:07Speaker 01

  Nice.

• 1:50:07Joe Rogan?

  So it was one of those weird things, but I never, I auditioned for two shows ever. I auditioned for that hardball show, I got that, that got canceled, and then auditioned for news radio. That was it.

• 1:50:17Speaker 01

  Really?

• 1:50:18Joe Rogan?

  It was the nuttiest thing of all time. So I didn't want it, it just happened. So it wasn't something like it was my golden carrot. My golden carrot was just I wanted to be a professional comic.

• 1:50:28Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:50:28Joe Rogan?

  And then I, as I was like barely making money as a professional comic, barely surviving, all of a sudden they're like, we'll pay you $25,000 a week. I was like, what do I have to do? Well, they're gonna act? Okay, now I'm acting. And I would have moved back to New York 100% if I didn't get an apartment. So I, I signed a one-year lease on this apartment in North Hollywood. And so I was staying and I was like, ah, I gotta stay. Because I wanted to just go back to New York and play pool and hang out with my friends. I didn't like it in LA. It wasn't my cup of tea. I didn't like peeing around actors. And it was hard to make friends with some of the comedians and the comedy store was weird back then. So I was like, I was ready to go back to New York and I had this fucking lease. So I was like, I can't break the, I don't have that kind of money. I've got to keep this lease going. So I, I stayed there and then I got news radio, like right afterwards.

• 1:51:11Speaker 01

  Which is great.

• 1:51:12Joe Rogan?

  It was crazy.

• 1:51:13Speaker 01

  That's a whirlwind for sure. It is funny though, it's like, just that lead of that, like that you're supposed to do, like, to me, it was sitting for whatever the 10th time, you know, I think, and watching, especially actors, like, walking back and forth, like, how serious they're taking getting there. And I'm just like, holding the sides barely and I'm like, what's like three lines we gotta say, like, relax. And I didn't book stuff, but it's also just like, as I'm sitting there, like, I don't know if I want to be the... You know, the Trident cinnamon gum guy.

• 1:51:45Joe Rogan?

  Mitch Hedberg used to have a bit about it.

• 1:51:47Speaker 01

  I don't know if I care. I just don't like, it's like if you get it, it's almost like fantastic. You know, like that's great, but.

• 1:51:52Joe Rogan?

  If you get it, it's extra money.

• 1:51:53Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 1:51:54Joe Rogan?

  But then, once you get all the extra money, you don't have to really do that anymore. And that's when you gotta decide, like what do you, like, one of the things that I had to decide after I did Fear Factor, I was like, okay, no more of that, please.

• 1:52:04Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:52:04Joe Rogan?

  And I did it one more time. I did it one more time when, uh, in 2011, Fear Factor came back for a brief amount of time, and that's when they made people drink jizz. And that's when I got cancelled forever. Until Ludicrous came back and did it on MTV.

• 1:52:18Speaker 01

  No jizz, that was then the no jizz rule.

• 1:52:20Joe Rogan?

  They toned it down back then. But it was, uh, is it just like, there's a different thing that's happening when you're doing something just for money. You know, you're just like, okay, it's worth it. It's worth it for this amount of money. And then you gotta know what to do with that money.

• 1:52:34Speaker 01

  But I used to have to.

• 1:52:34Joe Rogan?

  You gotta plan, plan your escape.

• 1:52:36Speaker 01

  I used to have to like, like, talk myself into, like, when I would get those weird, like, talking head shows, I think on History Channel, we did, like, I love, they were trying to do, like, a spoof of I Love the 80s and I Love the 90s.

• 1:52:48Joe Rogan?

  Right, right.

• 1:52:48Speaker 01

  They would do, like, I Love the 1880s, or I Love the 1890s or whatever. And they would give us, like, history stories and write jokes, and you're gonna do talking head things. And I would look at it as a burden of that next day.

• 1:52:59Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:53:00Speaker 01

  I mean, I gotta wake up at eight to go into the city and, like, to do this thing. It's never, I look at all the stuff and I'm like, it's network, it's History Channel, so it's like, I can't really do exactly what it is I do. And then, uh, because I'm gonna go as close as I can to my own voice that, like, it's probably not gonna get a lot of stuff on anyway.

• 1:53:18Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:53:19Speaker 01

  And, but I had to really convince myself, like, you know, uh, there, there was a kid across the street from me, uh, when I lived in South Jersey for the couple of years, who was in a Fruit Loops commercial, I said, and he, and he, I said, he might as well have been Brad Pitt. You know what I mean? Like, like, to me, I was like, he's been on television. And I'm like, think, uh, I'm going to do a TV show tomorrow. History Channel or anything. If you told me when I was 12, 13 years old, that, hey, you wanna do a TV show, be on TV on the History Channel, you'd be like, no, TV? Is that possible? You know, so you have to remember that it is pretty, like, extraordinary to have some of these opportunities, but man. So I try to take them in when I have them. I did, I was in the movie Hustlers, uh, as the strip club DJ.

• 1:53:56Joe Rogan?

  What is Hustlers?

• 1:53:57Speaker 01

  It's a, it's a true story of the girls at Scores who were, like, rob, the strippers that were robbing the guys.

• 1:54:02Joe Rogan?

  Oh, really? When did that movie come out?

• 1:54:04Speaker 01

  A couple of years back now, but, uh, shit, maybe like seven years, six, seven years ago. But I was the strip club DJ and that and like I really had to go there because I look at the in hindsight of it, it's like it was two fourteen hour days of like nothing, so much nothing going on.

• 1:54:22Joe Rogan?

  Right, you're just waiting.

• 1:54:22Speaker 01

  Just waiting around.

• 1:54:23Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 1:54:24Speaker 01

  And just whiffing when I had these opportunities, but I'm also trying to take in, I'm like, holy shit, that's Usher over there, fucking, that's fucking J Lo. It's like, as I'm sitting here like, when do you guys need me again? It's like J Lo's in a thong, like, you know, twerking on stage, like doing her scene and you're like, oh, I should really enjoy some of it, you know what I mean?

• 1:54:42Joe Rogan?

  J Lo was on stage twerking?

• 1:54:44Speaker 01

  Yeah, I introduced her, her big dance. Do you know, uh, two thousand eighteen, maybe? Yeah, my voice opens this scene.

• 1:54:56Joe Rogan?

  Damn, is that really J Lo?

• 1:54:57Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:54:57Joe Rogan?

  So this is her ten years ago?

• 1:55:00Speaker 01

  Fifty, fifty years old.

• 1:55:01Joe Rogan?

  Not then, she wasn't.

• 1:55:02Speaker 01

  Yep, she was fifty on set, yeah.

• 1:55:04Joe Rogan?

  Wait a minute, how old is she now? You said this is two thousand what? Two thousand when?

• 1:55:10Speaker 01

  Two thousand ni- like nineteen, eighteen?

• 1:55:14Joe Rogan?

  Was she really fifty back then?

• 1:55:15Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:55:17Joe Rogan?

  God, six years ago, she's not fifty-six, is she?

• 1:55:19Speaker 01

  She was nineteen.

• 1:55:22Joe Rogan?

  Okay, how old is J Lo?

• 1:55:23Speaker 01

  So she's fifty-six, I guess now.

• 1:55:25Joe Rogan?

  No. Is she really?

• 1:55:30Joe Rogan?

  Whoa, that's crazy.

• 1:55:33Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:55:33Joe Rogan?

  Bro, what is she doing?

• 1:55:35Speaker 01

  I don't know, but she looked fantastic and it really shined a light on this girl's narrow.

• 1:55:38Joe Rogan?

  Crazy genetics.

• 1:55:39Speaker 01

  This girl's narrow Asian ass really like shined a light on that. It almost, when they were choreographing them together on stage, it looked so, it looked so shitty.

• 1:55:48Joe Rogan?

  That's...

• 1:55:50Speaker 01

  Yeah, she looks great.

• 1:55:51Joe Rogan?

  That's incredible. Good for her.

• 1:55:53Speaker 01

  She seemed nice. I tried to talk to her once and I whiffed hard.

• 1:55:56Joe Rogan?

  Did you?

• 1:55:56Speaker 01

  I just.

• 1:55:57Joe Rogan?

  Get panicked?

• 1:55:58Speaker 01

  I planned.

• 1:55:59Joe Rogan?

  Thought you could be number six?

• 1:56:00Speaker 01

  I planned what I was gonna say, that's what the problem was.

• 1:56:03Joe Rogan?

  Wait, oh, you did?

• 1:56:04Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:56:04Joe Rogan?

  How bad?

• 1:56:05Speaker 01

  I, it was bad. I said when she, next time she turns around, because she seems nice, she's gonna like, at some point, she's gonna talk to me, we're doing this one scene together where she hands me money. And I say like a line. And every time they yell "cut", she'd put her robe on, turn around, talk to her assistant, but I'm like, "She does seem nice", and she's gonna turn around and ask me some version of "how you doing",

• 1:56:25Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 1:56:26Speaker 01

  And I'm gonna say, "Ah, you know, I'm just living the life of a fake strip club DJ", and that's gonna make her giggle, and then we're best friends for life. And instead of waiting for her to say anything, the next time she just, her eyes just crossed my eyes, I went, "Living the life of fake strip club DJ", like, foul her face. And she was like, "Excuse me", and I was like, "Oh", and then her assistant started laughing at me, and then I demanded to go outside to get a soda. They were like, "We'll get you a soda", I'm like, "Please let me go outside and reset this moment", "I hate this".

• 1:56:56Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, you can't have a diva roll her eyes at you. That'll fuck your confidence up. No matter who you are.

• 1:57:02Speaker 01

  No.

• 1:57:02Joe Rogan?

  Jennifer Lopez rolls her eyes at you?

• 1:57:04Speaker 01

  It hurts so much.

• 1:57:05Joe Rogan?

  How she looks so good.

• 1:57:07Speaker 01

  I don't know, but she really did.

• 1:57:08Joe Rogan?

  It's pretty extraordinary.

• 1:57:09Speaker 01

  It's that thing where it's a person that's in a room and you're like, "Oh, a celebrity's here", like, they give that off.

• 1:57:14Joe Rogan?

  Right, but it's like, think of her beauty, and then that other lady that you said that did a bunch of shit to her face, probably the same age, right?

• 1:57:21Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:57:22Joe Rogan?

  Isn't that crazy?

• 1:57:23Speaker 01

  It is crazy. You know who's also in that movie, by the way? A young, only one-song-out Lizzo, and everyone was so excited for her, and I didn't know who she was, and they go, they were talking about the celebrities are gonna be there today, and she's playing a stripper. And I was like, "Hmm, I'm wondering who it is", and then, uh, hours later, my next question was, I'm like, "Who's the big, fat stripper wearing the fishnet outfit", and they're like, "That's Lizzo", yeah, like, "That's Lizzo", I was like, "Christ almighty, what? Are they making her do that?". And again, it's my own fat insecurity that I put out on other people, almost like I said that guy earlier, who was like, the robe open.

• 1:58:01Joe Rogan?

  There's gotta be guys that wanna do that.

• 1:58:03Speaker 01

  I'm impressed, I'm impressed with that, 'cause what I have is much more, which I always found interesting, uh, Chris Farley. You know, these most, this most famous thing ever is the Chippendales sketch.

• 1:58:14Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 1:58:15Speaker 01

  With Patrick Swayze. I've always thought, and I just know this from, I'm, I'm good friends with his brother and, and from years of reading stuff about it, like, that's, if you wanna trickle back what killed him, it's essentially that. Do you know what I mean? It's like, he hated, he was willing to do it, like, I'll be the fat gross guy, but he hated it. He didn't want everyone to think he was like fat and gross. So I, I'd say I have a hard time with like, with those kinda things. So I'm impressed also with someone who's like, ladies, you know, with like their fucking fat rolls on their sides, welcome to the party.

• 1:58:44Joe Rogan?

  Well, it's-

• 1:58:45Speaker 01

  How do you do it, man? And Lizzo, just like, fuck it, I'm wearing a thong, like, don't, you don't have to.

• 1:58:51Joe Rogan?

  It's one of those things where it's like, you wanna celebrate people that don't care. Like, yeah, you go. But also, yikes.

• 1:58:58Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:58:58Joe Rogan?

  It's also yikes.

• 1:59:00Speaker 01

  It's always lies too, by the way. She's lost a hundred pounds.

• 1:59:02Joe Rogan?

  Well, also, remember when she was accused of fat shaming all the girls that she worked with and making them making hookers?

• 1:59:09Speaker 01

  Yeah, making each stripper pussy and shit?

• 1:59:10Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, like, whatever, whatever was going down, whatever she was accused of, I don't know if it was real. But it's like, the Chris Farley thing, I never would have imagined that he hated doing that.

• 1:59:20Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah. No, he loved making people laugh, but he hated that it was at the expense, and I don't think I'm speaking out of school here, that, uh, but it never seemed like that's, that stuff did bother him, I think. He wanted, he, he wanted girls to like him, he wanted, uh, you know what I mean? So that's why he got big into drugs.

• 1:59:35Joe Rogan?

  Are you basing this on conversations that you've had with people that know him or like?

• 1:59:38Speaker 01

  Conversations, I've watched so much stuff like, uh, on him, yeah, yeah. And you could see, like, you know, they, again, it's people reading in this stuff and shit, but yeah, but I think also from talking to his brother and stuff.

• 1:59:48Joe Rogan?

  I met him once. I met him once when he was in the throes of it.

• 1:59:52Speaker 01

  Really?

• 1:59:53Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, there's a couple of people that I met where their skin looked like wet cardboard.

• 1:59:57Speaker 01

  Uh.

• 1:59:58Joe Rogan?

  Like, it was the consistency of wet, like, gray cardboard. Like sweaty gray cardboard. So he was, uh, on the set, hanging out. There was always like a lot of fun people that were on the set that you got to meet. And, uh, he wasn't working, uh, on the show, he was just there to hang out. And so, um, I ran into him like during the craft service table area and he was just, looked terrible. And I don't know, like, what year did he die?

• 2:00:29Speaker 01

  I think late nineties also.

• 2:00:32Joe Rogan?

  So this was around ninety seven ish, somewhere around then. So news radio was ninety four to ninety nine.

• 2:00:38Speaker 03

  Kind of ninety seven, December, week before Christmas.

• 2:00:41Joe Rogan?

  That's when he died.

• 2:00:42Speaker 03

  Thirty three.

• 2:00:43Joe Rogan?

  So it might have been the year he died.

• 2:00:45Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:00:46Joe Rogan?

  Cause he, he looked like hell. He looked like he was just so sweaty and so gray. He just looked fucked up. The one other time, there was a dude that I ran into at um, the improv and he couldn't form sentences. He, he had like the same gray skin and he was talking to me, but nothing made sense, but he just kept talking and he could, he couldn't form sentences. And I was like, this is the craziest thing I've ever seen.

• 2:01:13Speaker 01

  It's all so weird to get into that and then still be around comedy.

• 2:01:16Joe Rogan?

  Just be around public.

• 2:01:17Speaker 01

  Like, yeah.

• 2:01:18Joe Rogan?

  You're hanging around with people at a bar and you, you, you're so gacked up, you can't even form a sentence.

• 2:01:23Speaker 01

  I have a hard time with the, I mean, I can, I said, I can get caught up in like the, the dramatic conversation of like the, the science of comedy and like the, all the internal things and the manipulation of it, but at the end of the day, it's so silly when like, it's taken so seriously in some way too. It's like, it's not like, you know, unlike Daniel Day Lewis, who has to be Lincoln all day. Someone can go, Jay, they're calling your name on stage and you can go up, I don't have to like find my place. You know what I mean? Like, oh, I'm not even, you know, oh, hang on, okay. You know, you just go on stage and be like, shit, I didn't know they were calling me. Sorry, everybody.

• 2:01:58Joe Rogan?

  But also you're doing sets multiple times a night. You're doing multiple sets a week. You're so comfortable with being on stage. It's not like, action.

• 2:02:06Speaker 01

  Right.

• 2:02:06Joe Rogan?

  You know, you're Lincoln, go.

• 2:02:08Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:02:09Joe Rogan?

  Four score and seven years ago.

• 2:02:12Speaker 01

  And you mess up a line, they gotta go, change the gate. They gotta do a bunch of fucking things.

• 2:02:16Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. And there's always someone who wants to come in and touch up your hair and then there's fucking people moving around and there's always some, so many support people, it's hard to just like keep your fucking concentration.

• 2:02:26Speaker 01

  Some people like being doted on. Dan Soder, I've always been, he likes acting and, and not even just acting. He likes the day. He takes the day in the trailer and he said he'll write jokes and.

• 2:02:37Joe Rogan?

  He's a happy dude. Dan Soder seems like he's always happy. It's hard to imagine him being even angry. Like, he was talking to me about somebody who ripped off one of his jokes. And even that, the way he's talking about the guy ripping off his joke and confronting him about ripping off the joke, it's still, he's like, he's being silly.

• 2:02:55Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 2:02:56Joe Rogan?

  He's being silly and laughing about it. I'm like, wow.

• 2:02:58Speaker 01

  Oh, he's the best, for sure.

• 2:03:00Joe Rogan?

  Great demeanor. So that's like a glass is always half-full guy. He's, he's fine with doing a little acting here and there, but if he, you know, what he wants to do is stand-up. He's a great stand-up.

• 2:03:07Speaker 01

  No, no, he's great stand-up, and he does want to do stand-up, and he wants to make shows. He's got a lot of, uh, interests that I think he'll be great at all of them. I'm just saying more like, uh, you know, I'm losing my train of thought.

• 2:03:16Joe Rogan?

  Well, you don't have to do all that other stuff. And the thing is, like, back in the nineties, we all thought we had to do that other stuff. I would have never imagined, like, quitting a TV show and just so I could do stand-up on the road. First of all, you needed the TV show so people would come to see you. That was people, that was a big thing. Back then, people came to see you if you were on The Tonight Show, or if you had an HBO special, or if you had a sitcom.

• 2:03:39Speaker 01

  That's why I was so, so impressive, a person like, uh, like Regan.

• 2:03:45Joe Rogan?

  Yes, I was just gonna bring him up, yes.

• 2:03:46Speaker 01

  It's like, you did it straight through comedy, man.

• 2:03:49Joe Rogan?

  Just organic.

• 2:03:50Speaker 01

  And got to theaters.

• 2:03:50Joe Rogan?

  Yep, huge theaters. It sells out instantly, just because he's so good.

• 2:03:55Speaker 01

  You know, it's funny, the quietest, the people who are the most, uh, surprising. There's huge earning comics that we've, you've never even heard of and stuff. I always think about, like, Sean DePierce is a lady, just like a, an old lady from, uh, the South, but she's multimillionaire, sells out, she performs at, like, churches and stuff.

• 2:04:16Joe Rogan?

  Really?

• 2:04:17Speaker 01

  Yeah, but it's just stand-up, and it's just like the most mundane, like... But, like, it's not for me, obviously, but I mean, with this, kind of whatever, you know, like, act that, you know, wouldn't impress anybody, she's making millions.

• 2:04:32Joe Rogan?

  Christian comedy's a tough sell.

• 2:04:34Speaker 01

  Yeah, well, but there's a market for it, for sure.

• 2:04:36Joe Rogan?

  There is a market for it. I remember there was a bunch of people that went into Christian comedy. That, there was like a Christian comedy tour back in, like... Yeah, it was terrible, it was terrible.

• 2:04:46Speaker 01

  To want to go to that seems boring, even if you were religious, like, I don't want to go watch religious comedy.

• 2:04:50Joe Rogan?

  But it was like the most aw shucks stupid shit. About like, the guy's dumb and my wife always tells me I'm dumb, and she's right. Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho.

• 2:04:57Speaker 01

  It's why Nate Bargatze is so impressive to me, and always has been, is because he's clean in that way. You can call him a Christian comic, and it doesn't matter, because... If you just watch the comedy, if you're not listening to all the labels being put on them.

• 2:05:09Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 2:05:09Speaker 01

  He's just brilliant.

• 2:05:10Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it's just brilliant.

• 2:05:11Speaker 01

  And more than brilliant, hilarious, fucking hilarious.

• 2:05:14Joe Rogan?

  Hilarious and squeaky clean, yeah. And you throw them on anywhere in a lineup.

• 2:05:18Speaker 01

  Yeah, I saw Gary Goleman was so impressive in that way, too. It just didn't have to be dirty, like, almost like subjects, you were, if someone said the right joke about this subject, you're like, nah, that's corny.

• 2:05:28Joe Rogan?

  Well, Gaffigan's the best example.

• 2:05:29Speaker 01

  Yeah, he's great, too.

• 2:05:30Joe Rogan?

  Gaffigan's been killing it forever, squeaky clean. You know, there's, you know, there's a market, like, again.

• 2:05:35Speaker 01

  But everyone shouldn't be that.

• 2:05:37Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 2:05:37Speaker 01

  That's the Hannah Gadsby, uh, argument she made, that's, that's the, really, uh, whatever my opinions about her comedy are, meaningless. It was an article she did where she was like, if you're not using your comedy to like move society forward in some way.

• 2:05:49Joe Rogan?

  Should I say that?

• 2:05:50Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:05:50Joe Rogan?

  That's hilarious.

• 2:05:51Speaker 01

  Like, you're wasting time, basically. Like, you're like, you need to come and talk about your rape, or you're wasting time doing comedy. And it's like, or do I even, you're not being personal, I go, so you're saying like Dave Attell, Brian Regan, Carrot Top, you're saying people just shouldn't be in comedy because they're a different like faction of it than you? That's insane.

• 2:06:07Joe Rogan?

  It's insane.

• 2:06:08Speaker 01

  And God forbid, if everybody started doing Hannah Gadsby-style equality, she's fucked. She's not gonna be the best at it. You know what I mean?

• 2:06:15Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 2:06:16Speaker 01

  It's like, why are you welcoming, it's like, why don't you stay, keep your lane and be happy with how great it is?

• 2:06:19Joe Rogan?

  Here's the other thing about comedy, like, you should be funny first. If you wanna do all that other stuff, too, but if you wanna do all that other stuff and you call it comedy, but it's not funny, like, you're doing something where you're just trying to educate people, hey, that you missed the whole mark of this whole thing, and to say that that's the most important thing, the only people that would say that are people who aren't funny.

• 2:06:43Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:06:43Joe Rogan?

  That's it. That's the only people that would ever think that the most important thing is to move social justice forward with your comedy.

• 2:06:49Speaker 01

  If somebody told me I made them think on stage, I'd go, about what?

• 2:06:52Joe Rogan?

  About what? Listen, you could be as social justice-y as you want. You could talk to your phone, you could make long rants on reels, you could do podcasts, you could do whatever you want. Talk about issues. But when you're on stage, what you're supposed to be doing is be funny. Now, if you can be funny with some sort of grand message that makes everybody Bill Hicks clap at you, that's great. But that's not the goal. The goal is to just be funny, and if that's your goal, you wanna be funny with a social justice, great. Nothing wrong with it. But you gotta be funny. You can't, like, fake it and get claptur and think you're...

• 2:07:27Speaker 01

  Anything I would even say with passion on stage, I could end just as easily by going, or not. You know, or maybe I'm completely wrong, I don't know.

• 2:07:34Joe Rogan?

  Definitely.

• 2:07:35Speaker 01

  How the fuck would I know?

• 2:07:36Joe Rogan?

  Remember guys would do this when they were bombing, "Hey, how about a nice round of applause for the ladies? Give a round of applause for all the ladies in the crowd."

• 2:07:42Speaker 01

  Let's go. How many, uh, in the black comedy circuit, it was, uh, those were the funniest, how many they would give. He goes, "How about for ladies?" "How about for a brother doing the right thing, staying out of jail, doing the right thing, trying to do the right thing?"

• 2:07:52Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, they'd get claps, yes, yes. And then it was positive energy. The show was going your way.

• 2:07:58Speaker 01

  But we all used some crunch in that. I went, I think, so, not just because I was like, you know, obviously inspired by like the dices and stuff with the comics that I liked, the dirtier guys. But I would go dirty because I found out pretty early, if you go dirty, even if you don't get the laugh because the joke wasn't good, you're gonna get the groan and it was a noise.

• 2:08:13Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:08:14Speaker 01

  Because that was it to me. Again, I said, the silence was the thing. Once it was silent, I was like, "Someone, please save me from this. It's going so bad."

• 2:08:21Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, if you get a few, "Oh, God."

• 2:08:24Speaker 01

  Yeah, at least you're like, "Ah, they're with me." You can kind of laugh that off yourself, yeah.

• 2:08:28Joe Rogan?

  And then if you're laughing genuinely, maybe these people will start smiling.

• 2:08:33Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it's a fucking weird art form, dude. But, you know, kudos to you for just doing that. Because that's the way to do it. And then Legion of Skanks too. Like what Lewis and you guys and Dave, what you guys have done is so interesting because you did it all without ever worrying about being like removed from YouTube. You know, because you did it all on his network, on Gas Digital.

• 2:08:55Speaker 01

  I mean, he started Gas Digital essentially for Legion of Skanks, more or less.

• 2:08:58Joe Rogan?

  So smart.

• 2:08:59Speaker 01

  And it would have like a platform that they really can't get rid of.

• 2:09:01Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, because it limits your reach a little bit. But over time, people figure it out. That's why Skankfest is so fucking huge. Skankfest is nuts, dude.

• 2:09:11Speaker 01

  It's fun. It's been created in New Orleans this year.

• 2:09:14Joe Rogan?

  I should have got in when I could have done it. Now it seems like I don't, I just, I don't, there's too many people. I'll get anxiety.

• 2:09:21Speaker 01

  There's a lot of people, for sure.

• 2:09:23Joe Rogan?

  But it's amazing how like,

• 2:09:24Speaker 01

  You'd have a blast.

• 2:09:25Joe Rogan?

  It's such a celebration of people just being stupid and having fun.

• 2:09:29Speaker 01

  Absolutely, and it's no like, you know,

• 2:09:31Joe Rogan?

  No pretense.

• 2:09:32Speaker 01

  No, and I said they all look the part, but they're such great comedy fans.

• 2:09:35Joe Rogan?

  That's what everybody says.

• 2:09:36Speaker 01

  And by the way, also, I mean that in the sense that it's like, there's been so many people who have been like, skank faces and my thing, I'm like, dude, they're gonna fucking lose their minds for you.

• 2:09:44Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, you don't even know.

• 2:09:45Speaker 01

  It's like they're comedy fans, they're not just like, our fans exclusively.

• 2:09:48Joe Rogan?

  They're also fans of people that are willing to do real comedy in this fucking bizarre world, where you're being told that the most important thing is for you to do social justice on stage. Which I shouldn't say that's the world now, cause that, it's not. It was the world like, four years ago. Four years ago, you heard that a lot.

• 2:10:05Speaker 01

  Oh yeah.

• 2:10:05Joe Rogan?

  And that's kind of died off. And there was a bunch of things that killed that, but I think the real nail in the coffin, the final one was the Tom Brady roast.

• 2:10:12Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:10:13Joe Rogan?

  I think that was the grand nail in the coffin of woke comedy.

• 2:10:17Speaker 01

  Well, all you had to show people was that there was like, if you stick with something for a minute, like, there is an audience there. You're just listening to a bunch of lunatics screaming with nothing to do with their lives. It's like, but if you give it a second, like, conversely, of much people are writing, they're angry about this, there's a bazillion people who just like it.

• 2:10:34Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, you can't cater to the people that are upset at what popular thing there is out there.

• 2:10:41Speaker 01

  Can you imagine writing a letter to ACDC, like, this last record sucked. First, second song's okay, but third song blows, and the fourth one's like-

• 2:10:50Joe Rogan?

  That's the fuck you, you're not funny person in the crowd. There's always gonna be a percentage of them. It's an unavoidable aspect of human nature. There's a bunch of people that don't do anything, can't contribute, and wanna knock down everything they see in front of them. There's a bunch of people that were born with amazing genetics, that just have this superiority over everybody that they believe is real. And they, you know, especially if you're pretty, and everybody wants to fuck you, and you think you could yell at anything at the guy on stage.

• 2:11:13Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:11:13Joe Rogan?

  Maybe you hate men, cause your ex-boyfriend's a piece of shit, and you've had a couple of cocktails, and fuck him, and fuck this guy. Don't fucking say women can't do it, men can do it.

• 2:11:24Speaker 01

  Break down, it's the funniest. So, you're trying to break down your bit?

• 2:11:29Joe Rogan?

  Well, that's the best. I had a lady heckle me once where I was trying to explain. I was doing this bit about, uh, I had a bit about the guy who broke into the White House. Cause this guy, uh, some fucking maniac broke into the White House. He just hopped the fence, ran across the lawn and broke in and there was a lady guarding the front door. And he smacked her to the ground, just ran through, and he got tackled by an off-duty Secret Service guy. It was like getting a cup of coffee and sees this fucking guy running through the White House and he tackles him. And the joke was about a woman being a security guard at the White House. And the joke was supposed to be, um, I know, because, guess what? I shouldn't be a security guard at the White House. I go, and you know how I know? Cause I met Shaquille O'Neal and his dick is where my face is.

• 2:12:10Joe Rogan?

  It was like if the White House is experiencing a Shaq attack, I'm the wrong dude to save the world.

• 2:12:15Speaker 01

  You know shit?

• 2:12:16Joe Rogan?

  So the whole joke was about that and I couldn't get it out because this lady's like bullshit, bullshit. Uh, so the joke was, women can't do everything men can do because men can't do everything men can do. That's why we have the Olympics. There's some people that can just do shit that regular people can't do. And one of those things is guarding the fucking White House. Like you should be a big fucking giant dude who's capable of extreme violence. But this bitch wouldn't let me get this out. She's like, nah, dick, eh. And I tried to explain to her, this is how the joke goes. And then I went further into the joke and she chimed in again. I explained the joke and then she was, she was like, okay. I'm like, yeah, I can't, I'm saying I can't do it.

• 2:12:52Speaker 01

  I've gone hard at female cops so much. It's so great when I meet female cops that are like, they usually have a great sense of humor about it, quite honestly, but I will film and send to like, soders who I'll do it to. I watch Cops still a lot, like clips of the show Cops. And there was one I watched recently that was just about, uh, it's a female cop. Whenever it's a female cop, I'm like, I get my phone ready in case I have to film this. Cause like, oh, it's always gonna be something hilarious. And, uh, they're always in the way somehow or something. And it's, they're trying to stop this guy, you know, he's on foot, black dude. And this lady's like, let me see your ID. Let me see your ID right now. And then the guy's just slowly backing away and then he just decides to go, start running. And he runs and this girl is chasing him. This black guy is so far away from her, it's ridiculous.

• 2:13:36Speaker 01

  And then just coming, zipping right past her is a dude cop who just catches the guy and tackles him. And then it's the rest of the times of her standing over, breathing hard, she's like, son of a bitch got away. And it's like, lady, what are you doing? What are you doing? I saw, uh, One time I was waiting outside of a doctor's office in New York and I saw a guy who was naked with his hospital gown on the floor next to him.

• 2:14:01Speaker 01

  This isn't outside of a hospital, by the way, just a doctor's office. This guy left the hospital clear. He's naked. Still has his bracelet on. He's flapping his dick around. So I called the cops. And I go, hey, I think there's a guy who got out of a hospital here. He's naked and he's seems pretty unruly. He's like screaming shit. He's being kinda weird. And they go, will you stay on the phone with us and let me know when the officers get there? I go, sure. And then a big NYPD van pulls up. And two tiny little ladies get out. And I started laughing on the phone and I'm like, yo, I don't think these, these ones are gonna be able to handle. You might want to send somebody else. And they go, why? I go, because it's like two tiny ladies, miss. And I'm like, and this guy's like, like, I'm gonna have to get involved now and I don't want to.

• 2:14:43Speaker 01

  And then the guy stood up and he's walking towards them and the ladies are like, first of all, already touching their guns, which is like, again, not really necessarily, the guy's naked. He doesn't have a weapon, but just they're so tiny. Like, how many options do they have?

• 2:14:55Joe Rogan?

  Well, they have to.

• 2:14:55Speaker 01

  If he goes at them, right?

• 2:14:56Joe Rogan?

  That's the thing. If you're, if you're a small woman and a naked guy is coming your way and you don't know how to fight and you have a gun, you're grabbing your gun.

• 2:15:04Speaker 01

  And the guy just went up to them and just stood about seven feet in front of them and started pissing at their feet. And then, uh, and then finally, another cop car came with a guy who just, I mean, got out of the car right away, grabbed him by the arms, you know what I mean? Put his arms behind his back and they put the this thing back over him, his gown back on him. But it was just like-

• 2:15:21Joe Rogan?

  The guy had to pee. What's the problem? He didn't, couldn't find his clothes.

• 2:15:24Speaker 01

  But it's just so wild that I'm like, why are these two a team? At all?

• 2:15:29Joe Rogan?

  Yeah. I mean, I would like to say that women could do everything men can do. But I think in that circumstance, you'd probably want a big man.

• 2:15:38Speaker 01

  Field police work?

• 2:15:39Joe Rogan?

  That's crazy. You're dealing, one of the scariest videos that I ever saw was this guy. This lady pulled him over on the highway and the guy gets out and he's beating the fuck out of this lady cop. And his daughter, the guy who's beating the cop, his daughter is saying, daddy, stop. Daddy, stop. Because he's just beating the shit out of this unconscious lady. It's so scary. It's so scary because there's, there's no way she should have been in that situation. There's no way.

• 2:16:10Speaker 01

  A chubby female cop to boot is the funniest too. You're like, what is happening?

• 2:16:14Joe Rogan?

  All the time.

• 2:16:15Speaker 01

  What is the problem they're gonna solve?

• 2:16:16Joe Rogan?

  All the time.

• 2:16:16Speaker 01

  But they're in the way, like.

• 2:16:19Joe Rogan?

  I was at a casino once and this person who I thought, air quotes, was a woman. And I was talking to, and it was a security guard, like five foot five, like shorter than me. A security guard, woman, uh, I thought, thought was a woman. It, it wasn't disturbed by the fact that she was a security guard, none, none of it, but, but then at the end of the night, um, I had been talking to these people, you know, the show was over and I was like, well ladies, it was really nice to meet you. And she says, actually, I'm a man. And she says it like with a woman's voice. And I, and I'm like stuck. You know, I probably had a couple of cocktails, just did a show and I probably gotta go.

• 2:17:01Speaker 01

  Nah.

• 2:17:02Joe Rogan?

  Are you, you, for sure? Like, what? So I said, I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything by it. I didn't know. I gave her a hug, hugged everybody and I left. And I was, I felt proud of myself that I didn't say something.

• 2:17:15Speaker 01

  You should have nut checked her.

• 2:17:16Joe Rogan?

  I was just like.

• 2:17:17Speaker 01

  Yo, nut check.

• 2:17:18Joe Rogan?

  It's just like, you definitely, you're not, but you know, whatever. Like to, to think that I should have known, like that's crazy.

• 2:17:25Speaker 01

  And I had something.

• 2:17:26Joe Rogan?

  That you identify as a man?

• 2:17:28Speaker 01

  I had something turn on me so bad with that at a.

• 2:17:30Joe Rogan?

  Not even a mustache.

• 2:17:31Speaker 01

  At a diner.

• 2:17:35Speaker 01

  It was me, Josh, Adam Myers and, uh, and my girlfriend went to a concert and we went to a diner afterwards. And where they sat us this diner, our table was facing the booths that are going across. And the booth right across from where I'm staring is a cute girl and what I thought was a, a goth guy. I thought it was like a goth dude who's wearing like kind of fishnet stuff and everything. And they are making out hard, up like going, they're going for it. And I'm like, uh, you know, and we're kind of like laughing it off almost at first, you know, like, all right. I guess like they're going, but then it starts getting like, they're like, like she's like getting in a position, the girl,

• 2:18:16Speaker 01

  uh, the, the only girl I thought is when like the, the goth guy, he's rubbing like her pussy over the pants and she's like writhing around and stuff. And this is going on, then they stop.

• 2:18:26Joe Rogan?

  In a diner?

• 2:18:26Speaker 01

  Yeah. Then they stop, then they start again. It's a point where I go laughingly though too, I kinda go, alright, come on. And they're like, and they're like, they have like an, oh my god, what the fuck is wrong with you thing? Now, there's people, they're in a booth and we're the only people who see them. Oh boy. We're facing them. These booths are other people, but they're just not paying attention to what's going on there. I'm just happening to look at it and I'm like, alright, and they're like, what's the problem? And I'm still just kinda laughingly going like, I get it, but like, you know, I'm doing like a, guys, I'm like, you're fucking at the table. I mean, like, it's crazy. We're in a diner. And then it's getting shitty about it. And then I'm just like, I don't know what the problem's, I'm like, that's crazy, what you're doing and everything. And I'm like, I don't, we're not wrong here.

• 2:19:08Speaker 01

  And then she was, and then she goes, would you have a problem if we were a straight couple? And I was like, I thought that was, I thought that was a guy. I said, I didn't know it wasn't a straight couple. And then, uh, whatever, it all kinda calms down and then our food's coming, which is weird, we still have to sit there. And I go, yeah, I'm gonna go outside and smoke a cigarette and like regroup here a little bit. Biggest mistake I ever made. Cause I went outside and I'm, this is like a big glass front restaurant, you know, diner. And I'm smoking right outside the diner and I'm watching the narrative get created in the room without me being in the room. Oh no. The people behind and the staff coming up and being like the, we're sorry, things, people have to still act like that. People still, uh, act like that today and blah. And then when I go back in to eat, I mean, we are,

• 2:19:54Speaker 01

  pariahs, I just feel like. And then, the host guy, uh, like, you know, see to everybody is gay and he's side eye. It's just, it was so uncomfortable and I was like, Did you explain yourself? We didn't do anything. No, there was nothing to explain. He just was kinda awkwardly giving us our food and I'm like, you guys are mad somehow at me. How much spit do you think you ate? Oh, so much. So much spit. Shitty food. Then I told that story on my radio show. It was funny and somebody, like messaged like the Yelp or whatever, the thing. And they were like, that guy was, uh, being transphobic and we, uh, this is a welcoming restaurant who allows anybody in. It's like, this, how was this the narrative of what happened? They got you. They got me. They got you. Completely created around me. I wouldn't have cared if it was trans. I thought it was a straight couple fucking in a diner booth that I wanted to stop.

• 2:20:39Speaker 01

  Yeah, people are good at spinning a tale. If, and by the way, I said it's always the in-betweens too, in full disclosure. If the guy, like, had her, what I thought was the guy, had that girl's like shorts to the side, and I was watching him finger, I wouldn't have said a word. I would've just sit there and just drank it all in.

• 2:20:56Joe Rogan?

  Interesting.

• 2:20:57Speaker 01

  It was just-

• 2:20:57Joe Rogan?

  He wasn't going hard enough.

• 2:20:59Speaker 01

  It wasn't soft enough, or hard enough. It was Goldilocks right in the middle, and I don't wanna see, I don't wanna see you guys dry hump while I'm eating, either finger her, where we can all see, or fucking take it down the road.

• 2:21:12Joe Rogan?

  That's hilarious that they put that, put transphobia on, because you thought it was a guy.

• 2:21:16Speaker 01

  The whole diner, when we went back in, was like, oh, these intolerant people go, "I don't care if that's a girl, it means nothing to me."

• 2:21:22Joe Rogan?

  They didn't see it.

• 2:21:24Speaker 01

  Also, maybe if they announced it was a girl out of the gates, I might not say anything either. Just two chicks going at it, I'm like, "Look, these two wild motherfuckers."

• 2:21:33Joe Rogan?

  Right, you just thought it was crazy that it was a dude doing that.

• 2:21:35Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:21:36Joe Rogan?

  That's funny. Isn't that funny? This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Look, it's good to prepare for the future, but when you start over-analyzing what's happening around you, dreaming up every hypothetical situation of what could happen, that's when it gets dangerous. You can start to hyper-fixate and stress out, and all over things that haven't even happened. That's no good for current you, or future you. If you're struggling to stay in the present and out of your head, try talking with a quality therapist from BetterHelp. They have psychologists, family therapists, marriage counselors, social workers, and more.

• 2:22:18Joe Rogan?

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• 2:22:49Joe Rogan?

  This episode is brought to you by Chime. And I know people don't usually get excited about banking, but Chime is doing something different and it's worth paying attention to. In a recent survey, they ranked the number one choice for new checking accounts in America. That means real people, millions of them, are choosing this over traditional banks. That's because banking at Chime is fee-free. No monthly fees, no overdraft fees, and thousands of fee-free ATMs. But here's the real kicker. If you get their Chime card, it gives you 5% cash back on a category you actually pick yourself. Your savings rate, crazy high. It's nine times the national average. They're calling it the most rewarding way to bank. Go to chime.com/rogan.

• 2:23:34Joe Rogan?

  Takes a few minutes to sign up. Chime is a fintech, not a bank. Banking services and Chime card provided by Chime's bank partners. Terms and limits apply. Go to chime.com/disclosures for more details. Weird. It's weird how we look at that.

• 2:23:52Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah. But I said you get wrapped up in a thing and you're like, you're transphobic. That has nothing to do with any of this.

• 2:23:57Joe Rogan?

  It's a problem because that label, you could just slap on someone when you're talking about like male athletes that identify as women competing in girl sports. Like, that's not transphobic. That's just, we're talking about something crazy.

• 2:24:09Speaker 01

  Can I be trans-weirdic? Is that a term? Just be like, it's like, I think that's weird that, uh, that there's a six foot seven woman beating up an actual woman in a ring.

• 2:24:20Joe Rogan?

  There was some lady who was just arguing that there's no biological difference between men and women. I'm gonna send you this, Jamie, because it's so kooky. You're like, come on. You can't really think that this is true. This is-

• 2:24:34Speaker 01

  No biological difference?

• 2:24:36Joe Rogan?

  There's no difference between men and women's strength. Pennsylvania state senator said there's no biological advantage for men in women's sports or disadvantage for women in men's sports. This is-

• 2:24:48Speaker 01

  That's a woman?

• 2:24:49Joe Rogan?

  A woman said this. This is so crazy. I'll just send it to you, Jamie. It's so kooky, you're like, come on. Look, I know you wanna believe this, but if you're gonna be on TV saying things, it has to make some kind of fucking sense.

• 2:25:01Speaker 00

  Female bodies are just as strong as, uh, as fast and capable as male bodies. I want all girls to know that there are elected officials like me who would never underestimate your ability to beat a boy at their own sport. Because that's what the premise of this bill assumes, that female bodies are less than male bodies. For what reason, other than political gain, are we spending time and taxpayer dollars on a completely made up issue? Female bodies are just a

• 2:25:36Joe Rogan?

  That's so crazy to say.

• 2:25:38Speaker 01

  What guy heard her?

• 2:25:39Joe Rogan?

  She just got caught up in the woke bullshit. She lives in an echo chamber, probably. All the people around her are all either in academia or in some sort of left-wing fucking ideology, and they really believe that. And they believe that you should say that. Because if you're saying, if you're not saying that, you're saying women are less than men. That's not what anybody's saying. Strength and speed and athleticism is not all of life.

• 2:26:02Speaker 01

  Well, you make the point. There's men that are less than men in different areas.

• 2:26:06Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:26:06Speaker 01

  Of course.

• 2:26:06Joe Rogan?

  They're called coders. They're out there. Like, you know, they're incels, they're online, they're making apps. You know, there's a lot of different roles for people in this. Like, it doesn't make you a man just because you're, you can run faster than everybody else. But to say that men can't run faster than women is just, you're denying statistics and science and all the information that we have gathered forever. We have so much data. High school 15-year-old boys beat the women's soccer team, the professional team. So shut the fuck up. This is stupid to say. This is stupid to say. It's not transphobic, homophobic, it's not genderphobic, it's not misogynistic, it's just a fact of physical nature.

• 2:26:48Speaker 01

  But also, if you, if you hit the pinnacle, the, the fight's over. Do you know what I mean? If you just go like, women's sports is highly attended, it's given the same amount of TV time as men's sport and everything, and it's like, yeah, not enough.

• 2:26:59Joe Rogan?

  Not really.

• 2:26:59Speaker 01

  Like, now I wanna, now I wanna be in men's sports also.

• 2:27:02Joe Rogan?

  Well, that's the craziest one, when the WNBA players want as much money as the WNBA, as the NBA players. So, the NBA actually generates extreme amounts of revenue. If the WN, somebody wrote a joke about it, the WNBA wanted what their just pay was, and so they, they owe $400 million, because that's really what, how it balances out. It's like a losing, it's never been profitable.

• 2:27:23Speaker 01

  Do you know what those, uh, with those things, but like, again, like... It's like you're helping the one to hurt the many in so many things too. It's just like the, that video Shane showed me this years ago. The, the blind kid playing football. It's like a little boy playing pop Warner football and he's blind. And I'm like, who's this for? Like, you know, it's like-

• 2:27:44Joe Rogan?

  Where's your dad? Why's he letting you do that?

• 2:27:45Speaker 01

  Who is this for?

• 2:27:46Joe Rogan?

  Is it Daredevil?

• 2:27:47Speaker 01

  And the kid gives a speech. In the video, he gives a speech and he goes, he goes, "A lot of people say, blind people can't play football." And you're like, "Yeah, everybody." And you've never seen this video?

• 2:27:58Joe Rogan?

  No.

• 2:27:59Speaker 01

  This is maybe my favorite video on the internet. You know, Blind Football, Jamie, if you could? This is, it's a 30 second video. The song they picked for this is the, is the greatest thing in the world.

• 2:28:13Joe Rogan?

  So here's the thing about like the WNBA. If you love the WNBA, that's great. There's a certain amount of people that love the WNBA. It's great that women have a, an avenue for professional sports. But you only get paid as much as people are willing to go to see you. And if they're not willing to go see you, I'm sorry.

• 2:28:29Speaker 01

  Cause they wanna see dunks, this is great.

• 2:28:31Speaker 06

  It's that kind of confidence that continues to amaze people who watch Dylan play.

• 2:28:36Joe Rogan?

  Oh, this is so crazy.

• 2:28:38Speaker 06

  Blind.

• 2:28:39Joe Rogan?

  Oh, this is so crazy.

• 2:28:41Speaker 07

  I can't see and a lot of people think that I, that a blind person can't play football.

• 2:28:46Speaker 06

  But this courageous youngster has proven those people wrong.

• 2:28:56Speaker 01

  I mean, you can't play football by smell? That's impossible. But it's again, it's like, what you're actually doing is making this game not fun for anybody else out there.

• 2:29:07Joe Rogan?

  Right. You can't hit the blind kid.

• 2:29:08Speaker 01

  No one's gonna hit the blind kid. And if you do, you're a dick.

• 2:29:11Joe Rogan?

  You're just running around. So you have one less player, for real.

• 2:29:13Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:29:14Joe Rogan?

  It's just like your, your, your team has decided to be on a handicap so you can get on the news.

• 2:29:18Speaker 01

  We used to play basketball on a story every Wednesday. And Nate Bargatze one time brought his friend Nick Novicki, who's a little person, comedian. And he brought him and we were like, "Oh, he's gonna play? Like, alright, I guess." And we let him play. And every time he'd get the ball, the defense would lay off him and let him shoot. And he'd make it or miss it, but it was what it was. And then he started, uh, when everyone would lay off on defense, instead of shooting the ball, he'd try to like run in, like do a layup. And we're letting him. And it was like, until eventually Nate Bargatze of all people goes over and just cleaned his shot right into like the projects. He just sent him away. He's like, "I can't just, we can't just let this happen the whole time."

• 2:29:58Speaker 01

  It becomes not fun for everybody. It was a, there was a, when I was a kid, I remember very few stories, but there was a handful of like the girl that fought to get on the men's football team.

• 2:30:08Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:30:09Speaker 01

  Football's such a violent sport that to let girls play it, they have to put them in lingerie. The lingerie football league is the only, is the only visible women playing football sport. I don't know, but I wanted to start taking like bets on it.

• 2:30:21Joe Rogan?

  That was a thing, right? At one point in time?

• 2:30:23Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah. And they hit hard. They hit hard. Never saw roller derby live.

• 2:30:27Joe Rogan?

  Roller derby's like-

• 2:30:27Speaker 01

  There's also buns in basketball where they have, uh, morbidly obese black chicks wear thongs and play basketball.

• 2:30:32Joe Rogan?

  I haven't seen that.

• 2:30:33Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 2:30:33Joe Rogan?

  But roller derby's like more-

• 2:30:35Speaker 01

  Let's buy a team.

• 2:30:36Joe Rogan?

  Like a really hardcore lesbian type activity, right?

• 2:30:39Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 2:30:39Joe Rogan?

  I would imagine.

• 2:30:40Speaker 01

  I would assume, yeah, yeah.

• 2:30:41Joe Rogan?

  Like really fucking hardcore dyke bar girls with fucking weird tattoos.

• 2:30:46Speaker 01

  And there's some element of wrestling to it also. It's like not fully real.

• 2:30:50Joe Rogan?

  Very aggressive. They slam into each other. They get fucking crazy.

• 2:30:54Speaker 01

  The lingerie football, if you look up lingerie football's biggest hits, it's nuts what they've done.

• 2:30:59Speaker 03

  But they, I saw that they made a deal for something to air on ESPN2 this year. This is like a women's tackle football league.

• 2:31:04Speaker 01

  Oh, really?

• 2:31:05Speaker 03

  Championship game from last year.

• 2:31:06Joe Rogan?

  Wait a minute, these are chicks?

• 2:31:07Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 2:31:07Joe Rogan?

  Come on.

• 2:31:08Speaker 01

  Go back. That was a hell of a play.

• 2:31:10Joe Rogan?

  Whoa. That's nuts.

• 2:31:13Speaker 03

  Thirty, forty yard pass. Caught it?

• 2:31:15Joe Rogan?

  Oh my god. That's crazy. Dude, they look pretty good.

• 2:31:20Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:31:20Joe Rogan?

  This looks better than WNBA. Maybe they found it. Maybe women's tackle football is what's up. Because you're gonna see a lot of tackles.

• 2:31:28Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah.

• 2:31:29Speaker 03

  Yeah, I don't know if they get jacked up like they do in the, like, NFL or anything, but-

• 2:31:32Joe Rogan?

  Well, they have to. They're running into each other.

• 2:31:34Speaker 01

  Well, here's what's funny about this. These hits are pretty good, but they're wearing actual football pads. Lingerie football's biggest hits are they're wearing shoulders. Yeah, they're wearing shoulder pads and lingerie. They look like the fucking, like the Legion of Doom. They fucking used to come out. Yeah. Dude, they whale each other.

• 2:31:51Joe Rogan?

  Do they really?

• 2:31:52Speaker 01

  I mean, it's crazy. And titties never come out.

• 2:31:56Joe Rogan?

  That's great. They must have the thing strapped down. That's, ouch, ouch.

• 2:32:00Speaker 01

  It's like these pileups are crazy.

• 2:32:01Joe Rogan?

  How much staph infection is coming out of these fucking things? I'm seeing a lot of staph. I'm seeing a lot of staph happen in the future, these ladies.

• 2:32:09Speaker 01

  I mean, they blast each other into the sides.

• 2:32:11Joe Rogan?

  You're gonna get scratched up bad. You're gonna get staph for sure.

• 2:32:15Speaker 01

  But I will say, the fact you get 22 girls on a field who are not fighting the idea of like, "Oh, so we just gotta dress like sluts to play football?" They just go, "Yeah, we'll dress like sluts to play football."

• 2:32:27Joe Rogan?

  Fuck it.

• 2:32:28Speaker 01

  Why are they shamed? And buns and ba- if you find buns in basketball, we should buy a franchise, dude. I'll go halvesies with you.

• 2:32:35Joe Rogan?

  Oh, Jesus Christ. Oh my god. There's a couple of BBLs in there.

• 2:32:40Speaker 01

  Actually, see if you could find the buns in basketball leg break. There's a girl who fucking, she's a Paul George-like fucking leg break, because she's just fat and she just falls under the weight of her dribbling.

• 2:32:50Joe Rogan?

  How bad is it?

• 2:32:52Speaker 01

  It, it look, it's pretty gnarly. It's not the worst I've ever seen. It's not Tom Segura's arm bad, but it's close. That was bad.

• 2:32:59Joe Rogan?

  That was so bad.

• 2:33:00Speaker 01

  It's because when he pulls it back and it's flopped. It's the, uh, it's the Anderson Silva retracting the flopped leg, you know?

• 2:33:06Joe Rogan?

  His arm still is fucked.

• 2:33:08Speaker 01

  Tom's?

• 2:33:08Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it's still not 100%.

• 2:33:10Speaker 01

  Oh, I'd have to assume.

• 2:33:10Joe Rogan?

  His grip is still fucked up. He had a bunch of nerve surgeries and shit.

• 2:33:14Speaker 01

  Yeah, that was gnarly.

• 2:33:15Joe Rogan?

  Dude, imagine?

• 2:33:17Speaker 01

  If it just, imagine if anyone was playing defense?

• 2:33:19Joe Rogan?

  Going for a layup. It just pops. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

• 2:33:25Speaker 01

  Yep. Whoop, yep. Oh!

• 2:33:28Joe Rogan?

  Oh, god! It just snaps!

• 2:33:32Speaker 01

  For buns in basketball, of all things.

• 2:33:35Joe Rogan?

  Oh, it just snapped. Oh my god.

• 2:33:38Speaker 01

  Hey, I can tell it's, it's gonna rain tomorrow. How do you know that? Old buns in basketball injury?

• 2:33:43Joe Rogan?

  Bro, those are bad injuries. The femur's a real bad one, because you gotta get blood flow to it. Sometimes it takes a long time. Sometimes it doesn't fully heal.

• 2:33:51Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:33:52Joe Rogan?

  I know a couple of people with broken femurs.

• 2:33:55Speaker 01

  That's the most painful one.

• 2:33:56Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, I know a dude, Frank Mir, he was UFC.

• 2:33:59Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, sure.

• 2:34:00Joe Rogan?

  He got hit by a car when he was on his motorcycle and he got thrown through the air. And he was a giant fucking dude.

• 2:34:07Speaker 01

  He came back too.

• 2:34:08Joe Rogan?

  Took a long time for, he was like really back, back, you know, like it took well over a year and a half, two years before he was really performing at the same level. I mean, you'd have to ask him.

• 2:34:18Speaker 01

  Then he came out and fought Brock, right? He was like the right away.

• 2:34:20Joe Rogan?

  He fought Brock, he knee barred him. Yeah, that was all after the accident. Yeah.

• 2:34:25Speaker 01

  Man, UFC really has straightened out your belief in other people from other sports saying like, I can come do you, uh, mixed martial arts.

• 2:34:33Joe Rogan?

  Very few could ever pull it off, but Brock pulled it off.

• 2:34:35Speaker 01

  I mean, the funniest one for me was, again, just that blind belief I had in Kimbo Slice. I don't know, I don't know why I didn't think that Roy Nelson would just hold him on the ground and mush his face until a referee was like, hey, leave him alone. That's crazy.

• 2:34:51Joe Rogan?

  Well, Kimbo.

• 2:34:52Speaker 01

  He's a tough motherfucker, obviously, I mean.

• 2:34:53Joe Rogan?

  He was fighting just stand-up only, he's very dangerous. Like, if he was involved in, like, if bare-knuckle boxing was around back then, he would have been a huge star of bare-knuckle boxing. He would have fucked a lot of people up bare-knuckle boxing. But once you add in the wrestling and Kimbo had a bunch of knee injuries from football and, you know, it's, you can't really grapple at full capacity with knee injuries and learn grappling at 35 or however old he was.

• 2:35:19Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:35:20Joe Rogan?

  But dude, kudos to that guy for having the courage to actually just get into the UFC Ultimate Fighter. That's crazy. With very little grappling against, Roy Nelson was a jiu-jitsu black belt, Henzo Gracie black belt, like, Roy Nelson's fucking legit on the ground.

• 2:35:35Speaker 01

  He was great, big country. He was so fun.

• 2:35:38Joe Rogan?

  He was so heavy too, big, big old belly. He knows how to hold people down.

• 2:35:41Speaker 01

  And he was like, he would shut up Burger, he'd go to Burger King after the fights and stuff.

• 2:35:44Joe Rogan?

  He also could fucking punch, dude. That guy could punch. He had some of the craziest one punch knockouts ever.

• 2:35:51Speaker 01

  What is that, does that career amount to like, does, is he sitting on money now? Like a guy like that, or is he like?

• 2:35:57Joe Rogan?

  I don't know. I haven't talked to Roy in forever. I don't know. He wound up fighting for a bunch of different organizations. You know, he let, when he left the UFC, I think he fought for Bellator, but, uh, that guy has some crazy highlights. He knocked out Shob one shot. He knocked out.

• 2:36:12Speaker 01

  Oh, yeah, that's right.

• 2:36:13Joe Rogan?

  He knocked out a lot of people, dude. He'd connect on people, they would go night, night. It was nuts, man.

• 2:36:18Speaker 01

  So funny with Brendan.

• 2:36:20Joe Rogan?

  He knocked out a lot of fucking big, tough dudes.

• 2:36:22Speaker 01

  When anybody comes to Chubb, I'm always like, it's not even the, the wins he's had, more than I'm like, this guy's not afraid of you. Like, he's been punched by like, the best, and like, I promise you, whatever you think, he thinks you could do to him, it's not as bad as that.

• 2:36:37Joe Rogan?

  He's been beaten up by world champions, and he's knocked out world champ, he knocked out Mirko Krokop, which is crazy. Like, Mirko Krokop, back in the day, was the fucking man.

• 2:36:46Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 2:36:47Joe Rogan?

  He was like the first

• 2:36:47Speaker 01

  For the robot.

• 2:36:48Joe Rogan?

  elite kickboxer to really excel in MMA. He was the first guy to show all these other strikers that you don't even know what you're talking about. When he started fighting in Pride, it was like, this is another level. He would kick people in the body, and you would see, like, there's a photo of him Keith, kicking Heath Herring, and his fucking shin is halfway into his rib cage. It's so nasty when you look at the photo of it. You just go, the amount of power that that guy could generate in his kicks, like, there was nobody like that before him in kickboxing. Or in MMA, rather.

• 2:37:21Speaker 01

  I felt so bad, the first, that first UFC coming back during a quarantine, was so important, everybody. I don't know if it was the first one or the second one that came out, but that was when I was like, man, you gotta really pick your timing of when you're gonna shout out what you're dedicating a fight to. Cause there's that poor guy, like, he lost his stepdaughter, uh, and then he came out, like, wearing the shirt of the stepdaughter who passed away, and it was all dedicated to her. I mean, you can see, as Alistair Overeem beat him into submission with punches.

• 2:37:50Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:37:51Speaker 01

  The referee was even kinda going like, come on, man, please try to fight back. I said at the end, Alistair Overeem should have been like, it's okay, everybody, I was also fighting for his stepdaughter. Like, yay.

• 2:38:03Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it's tough.

• 2:38:05Speaker 01

  I mean, but to shout that out, like,

• 2:38:07Joe Rogan?

  It's tough.

• 2:38:07Speaker 01

  Before, yeah, it's crazy.

• 2:38:08Joe Rogan?

  It's a lot of weight on you, too.

• 2:38:09Speaker 01

  Those are great YouTube compilations, the cocky fighter comes to the ring to get, to lose.

• 2:38:14Joe Rogan?

  Oh, there's always like, the guy pushes the guy at the weigh-ins and starts shit at the weigh-ins and gets knocked unconscious.

• 2:38:18Speaker 01

  There was one, a guy came in the UFC cage, I forget who it was, but the way he entered the ring, like, he did a thing where he hung on the outside of the cage and like, swung into the ring,

• 2:38:26Joe Rogan?

  Mm-hmm.

• 2:38:27Speaker 01

  and did some crazy, like, move, and then just, it was like an immediate knockout. It was like a 30-second-er.

• 2:38:33Joe Rogan?

  Well, it's like you planning to talk to J-Lo, you just gotta let things happen.

• 2:38:37Speaker 01

  Just gotta let things happen.

• 2:38:38Joe Rogan?

  You can't, you can't plan, you can't plan things out. The inauthenticity of your planning will come to haunt you.

• 2:38:44Speaker 01

  Yeah, also the shit you talk through life is also in broadcasting as you start to get guests sort of starts to haunt you. It's like the thing like Howard Stern had to make a gazillion apologies, I assume by the time he the the guest he got on, because we've done it. Man, we fucked up so bad. We came in one day, we saw Bret Michaels in the Fishbowl. It was when me and Soder were doing the show still.

• 2:39:02Joe Rogan?

  The Fishbowl?

• 2:39:03Speaker 01

  Uh, of Sirius XM, it's like there's a studio that you could see into right in the front there where they'll do performances and stuff.

• 2:39:09Joe Rogan?

  Okay.

• 2:39:10Speaker 01

  And um, we were up in the uh, in the Fishbowl one time, we saw Bret Michaels when we came in talking to somebody. And then we go on air and almost like for the bit, we're like, how do we never get offered these guys? There's always like celebrities here and they weren't even brought to us as we can get them. It's so fucking crazy. And I go, right now as we speak, Bret Michaels is out there. And then we said something about like, like his bandana being attached to his hair. And like, and I think Soder said like they lower his, his bandana and hair onto him like Darth Vader, who just sits there and they lower it on. And then they come back and they go, he said he's willing to come in, so.

• 2:39:44Joe Rogan?

  Oh, no!

• 2:39:45Speaker 01

  Then he comes in and he's lovely. This guy was making future promises with us of what stuff he wants to do with us and hang out and come be a part of his summer festival and broadcast from there because he loves us so much. But his manager was listening the whole time and he said as soon as he left the studio, they went, those guys are not your friends. And you're like, ah shit, fuck, shit!

• 2:40:07Joe Rogan?

  He's gotta understand, they didn't know you.

• 2:40:10Speaker 01

  That's what it is.

• 2:40:10Joe Rogan?

  No, they know you.

• 2:40:11Speaker 01

  Corey Feldman hates my guts and it's like.

• 2:40:14Joe Rogan?

  What'd you do?

• 2:40:15Speaker 01

  Well, I've never non-stop talking about him.

• 2:40:17Joe Rogan?

  I've seen the video.

• 2:40:18Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, we've never stopped going. Oh, yeah.

• 2:40:20Joe Rogan?

  Do you hate on his dancing?

• 2:40:21Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:40:21Joe Rogan?

  Maybe it's getting better.

• 2:40:22Speaker 01

  We're not even hating on it at all. I love it. I want to do nothing different. Um, and I wish they tried, he tried to have us not allowed at his show when he opened for Limp Bizkit.

• 2:40:32Joe Rogan?

  Not allowed?

• 2:40:33Speaker 01

  Yeah, and this head of security was a fan. He came over to me and Bobby Kelly and he was like, yeah, he goes, he was asking if you guys were coming. I said yes. Then he asked if he could know where you were, uh, then he asked if we could not let you in and I was like, well, they're not doing anything, not threatening you or anything. They're coming to watch a show. And he was like, well, can I at least know where they're sitting at? And he goes, it'll be wherever the most excited people are. And son of a bitch, where are we? I mean, we were a sprout of grass on a dirt field of people. I mean, we were the only ones. We were hyped. I know all the words. He's the best. But I did, that was the genius of Howard Stern that I fucked up.

• 2:41:08Speaker 01

  When I started getting into broadcasting. I broadcasted always like it was gonna be me talking to a friend or friends, shooting the shit.

• 2:41:14Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 2:41:15Speaker 01

  Not that you're gonna come across these people. So I would have played more, what Howard Stern was always great at is like, take the lunatic, but he's always gonna be like, no, I, you're great. Dude, you're the best. And then the world make the joke.

• 2:41:26Joe Rogan?

  Right.

• 2:41:27Speaker 01

  Instead, like, I go at, but I was like, man, I would have loved to just have Corey Feldman come in, bi-monthly to do, hey, you got a new song? Play it, dude. I'll bite my fucking finger while I... Poor Corey.

• 2:41:39Joe Rogan?

  The thing, the thing about Corey that really does bother me, like legitimately.

• 2:41:43Speaker 01

  We were so happy.

• 2:41:45Joe Rogan?

  Oh, this is him? Let me hear this.

• 2:41:58Speaker 01

  He yells at his band.

• 2:41:59Joe Rogan?

  It's such a weird...

• 2:42:05Speaker 01

  The guitar solo. He doesn't know how to play the guitar.

• 2:42:09Joe Rogan?

  That's so crazy.

• 2:42:10Speaker 01

  But he just does the solo.

• 2:42:11Joe Rogan?

  How can you do a guitar solo if you don't know how to play a guitar? Does he actually not know how to play guitar? Like, do you know how to play?

• 2:42:17Speaker 01

  No. No, no, but you don't have to know how to play to know he does not know how to play. I could do what he's doing, for sure. But then, here's what he did. I, I, you know, I don't know what the trickle back is, but I said, after that was going viral, the guitar, I was like, why doesn't this guy just come out and say, like, like, if he's kinda like, no, I get it. I get the joke too. Like, then it kinda, it's like, puts people in there, stops them in their tracks. And then he kinda did that. He came, he goes, of course it's the worst guitar solo ever, of course. That's why I'm doing it. Like, it's funny, and it's like, no. And Fred Durst came out to watch him do it to prove he was doing it. Cause Fred Durst is smart, like Howard Stern. He makes him think he's his friend, but he's a way bigger enemy than I could ever be to him.

• 2:43:00Speaker 01

  Cause he's going like dude, go make an ass of yourself in front of all these people.

• 2:43:04Joe Rogan?

  He's a young star guy that grew up to become a man and they're all weird. There's no way you could be a star at six years old and come out normal. You don't have a normal life. It's impossible.

• 2:43:16Speaker 01

  Is there nobody?

• 2:43:17Joe Rogan?

  I don't think there's one. Everyone that I've met, I mean, there's some really talented people like Miley Cyrus and people that were childhood stars that are cool to talk to and but they struggle. It's a struggle. All of them struggle. Everybody struggles.

• 2:43:29Speaker 01

  Like Punky Brewster's probably fine right now.

• 2:43:31Joe Rogan?

  I don't know. I don't even know who that is.

• 2:43:32Speaker 01

  Punky Brewster? You don't remember that show?

• 2:43:34Joe Rogan?

  I don't remember.

• 2:43:34Speaker 01

  So Leo Moon Frye, she had the biggest titties when we were kids.

• 2:43:37Joe Rogan?

  Oh yeah, that's right.

• 2:43:38Speaker 01

  She made a great documentary a few years back.

• 2:43:39Joe Rogan?

  That's right, but didn't she became like a mom and got out of the business? Yeah, you can do that. But if you want to still-

• 2:43:45Speaker 01

  Oh, you're saying if you're still clamoring for the fame?

• 2:43:48Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, but I don't, I mean, I don't know how many people came out of the fame as a young person and were fine. But the people that stay and keep doing it, they're not fine. Most of them. I mean, maybe there's a few. I mean, I'm not saying it's impossible to do, but I'm saying the challenge of becoming a normal person with like a normal view of the world when you know, you're getting doted on when you're six. And you're the moneymaker in the house when you're a little kid, like your parents stopped working to manage you, like that kind of shit.

• 2:44:19Speaker 01

  Like those Carter kids. I mean, that's brutal. That Aaron Carter kid was

• 2:44:23Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 2:44:23Speaker 01

  lost. He was doing gay porn at the end. Not gay porn, but like gay, like cam stuff.

• 2:44:29Joe Rogan?

  Oh, really?

• 2:44:29Speaker 01

  Yeah. Just whacking off on camera with face tattoos.

• 2:44:33Joe Rogan?

  Like a boxing match against Lamar Odom?

• 2:44:35Speaker 01

  Supposed to. I don't know if it ever ended up happening.

• 2:44:37Joe Rogan?

  They did. I think they did. And it's so crazy because he's like this skinny guy with like not a muscle on his body and Lamar Odom used to play for the WNBA. Isn't that true? They did have it, yeah.

• 2:44:49Speaker 01

  It did happen?

• 2:44:50Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, Lamar just beats the brakes off.

• 2:44:52Speaker 01

  I mean, you'd have to assume.

• 2:44:53Joe Rogan?

  He's a former professional athlete. The fact that Chuck Liddell is the fucking, look at the size difference. This is so crazy. Look at him. He's trying to punch him. Aaron Carter's, he's letting him hit him. He just kinda, he touches him once. He's like letting him hit him.

• 2:45:11Speaker 01

  Oh, man.

• 2:45:12Joe Rogan?

  It's sad to watch. It's almost like, it looked like, oh, there you hit him with a left hand.

• 2:45:16Speaker 01

  What's really sad about it is, is people is, it's not just people watching you fight that, that wigs me out so much. It's that, uh, there's something that, knowing how to fight and the form of what you're doing, looking any kind of good, especially if you're fight, street fights, I mean, when they devolve into like, you know, like men swinging like this, you're like, oh, man, we really all suck at the end of the day at this. Like, it's so hard to keep like, uh, a fighter's composure on a street fight.

• 2:45:43Joe Rogan?

  Especially if shit's going down. Yeah, unless you do it all the time. I remember watching these two guys fight in front of the Comedy Store. And, uh, it was, uh, it was across the street when the House of Blues was over there. So it was right in front in the parking lot. These guys start yelling at each other and blah, blah, blah. And they get out like, almost in traffic. They're like on the sidewalk, like right where the street tumbles out. And I see these two guys facing off and I see the white guy, there's like a white guy and, uh, this looks like an out of shape African American fella. And the white guy starts swinging with, almost like with his eyes closed. And then the bus goes in between them, so I can't see them. And then as the bus goes back, the white guy's out cold,

• 2:46:28Joe Rogan?

  flat on his back, spread eagle, and the black guy's already running away. He's, he's out cold. They were just squabbling in front and I don't remember how it, I just remember this. I remember this and then the bus, and then, out cold.

• 2:46:45Speaker 01

  Do you have to deal with, uh, cause I mean, I know from like when Louis was working with Bizbing and stuff and he'd go to Vegas. Uh, he'd be like, they were all surprised at how many drunk guys at the casino try to like give him shit.

• 2:46:56Joe Rogan?

  Oh, there's a bunch of idiots out there.

• 2:46:57Speaker 01

  Do people come to you all the time? It's like, you know, you know karate for real dudes, that thing?

• 2:47:02Joe Rogan?

  No. If you hang out with enough drunks, long enough, someone will just avoid those areas.

• 2:47:08Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:47:09Joe Rogan?

  It's just, it's drunk people. But if you're one of them and you're hanging out and you're drinking with people, yeah, there's a, but, there's people used to get stupid with Chocolate Dell and Chocolate Dell was the light heavyweight champion. He was the scariest fucking human on the planet. And people would get stupid with him. They're on coke. They don't know what they're doing. They're out of their fucking minds.

• 2:47:24Speaker 01

  Think you could win that fight.

• 2:47:25Joe Rogan?

  People are gacked up, fucked up, they're all, they're crazy anyway, they're schizophrenic. People are, there's so many nuts out there in this world.

• 2:47:33Speaker 01

  The most thing about fighting too is endurance, that's what most people don't have in any kind of fight. If it's not over in thirty seconds, everyone's holding each other. One of my favorite things I watch, I watch a lot of like body cam crime shit on YouTube. And there's one, it's a, it's a Key West, it's a couple. Uh, the guy's hammered, he essentially, he's got money for sure, this guy, he's just trying to, you know, pay his bill with a library card or something, or he's like, he doesn't know what's going on. And he's barking at the staff and then someone on the staff pushes his face. And then it breaks into this melee, but it's, you know, fifty something year old white people getting into a fight. And one guy, uh, gets him in a side headlock, useless.

• 2:48:16Speaker 01

  And then they both sort of fall down, the husband and this guy who intervenes. And the guy who intervenes eventually puts his like legs, you know, puts in his hooks, basically. But does do na- does nothing, doesn't choke the guy out, and they're just kind of sitting there, two old exhausted guys. Ten minutes later at least, they get up and they kind of have like the, you're a pussy, you're a pussy kind of thing. And they leave, then it cuts back to the, the cops outside and they want to talk to the guy who intervened. Not mad at him, they just want to get his side of the story, what happened. And this guy is, he's an old man and the cops are questioning him and they, they start to lose their patience because he just wants to keep telling his hero story. He just watched what happened, it's just two old men holding each other on the ground, he goes,

• 2:48:58Speaker 01

  guy came out of nowhere and punched me and I grew up doing this shit, man, so. You know, I told the guy, I go, you, you got two ways this can go tonight, man.

• 2:49:07Joe Rogan?

  Oh no!

• 2:49:08Speaker 01

  He goes, you could, you can knock it off or I could beat the fuck out of you.

• 2:49:13Joe Rogan?

  He's telling this to the cops?

• 2:49:15Speaker 01

  Uh, yeah, if, you might be able to find, we're very classy, uh, body cam, we're very classy people.

• 2:49:23Speaker 01

  Maybe, hopefully you could find it, but it's uh, but when he's telling the cop, then he goes, he's like, I told him I could beat the fuck out of him, he goes, alright, so then you were able to like subdue him? He's like, yeah, he goes, I took him down, and I'm like, he goes, I don't want a problem with you, and I go, you, you want no parts of what I'm about to bring to you, my man. And it's all this, none of this happened. You just watched the video where he just grabbed him, they flopped on the ground and laid there exhausted for ten minutes while the lady screams. It's nothing, and it's just like, just a guy talking with that belief, yep.

• 2:49:55Joe Rogan?

  Is it?

• 2:49:55Speaker 01

  So this is the video.

• 2:49:56Joe Rogan?

  Let me see some action.

• 2:49:58Speaker 01

  That's just them getting on the ground. And he just puts his hook-

• 2:50:01Joe Rogan?

  Give me some volume? Will we get in trouble? Will we lose the YouTube rights? What happens? Okay, don't, don't, don't give me any volume then.

• 2:50:12Speaker 01

  So that's them, you can, I was fast forward, yeah, they just stay there. And eventually get up and have like the hands on each other, yeah, they're up.

• 2:50:22Speaker 01

  Now wait, no, no, no, it's right after the video.

• 2:50:25Joe Rogan?

  But we're not gonna be able to play it.

• 2:50:26Speaker 01

  Oh, you can't play the audio?

• 2:50:27Joe Rogan?

  No, they'll, they'll fucking get us on YouTube.

• 2:50:31Speaker 03

  If you're commenting on it, it's commentary.

• 2:50:34Joe Rogan?

  Are you allowed to?

• 2:50:36Speaker 01

  It's this guy.

• 2:50:38Speaker 08

  Yeah, I probably got punched, some douchebag jumped out of nowhere, giving shit to the employees, and I just said, hey,

• 2:50:48Speaker 08

  okay, so were you the first one to go ahead and grab him to try and- Well, no, so my, I was probably the first guy, these guys fucked with the waitress, and I was like, dude, what are you doing? The guy thought, punched me, and I said, dude, you don't wanna get into this with me. I grew up doing this shit. And I said, don't do it, I drug him, nothing around, I said, you, you got two options. Either stop, or I'm gonna beat the living fuck out of you. Okay. So I said, that's how it's gonna go, and he said, I want a problem with you, I said, you, you, you want nothing to do with what I'm gonna bring to you.

• 2:51:21Speaker 01

  Oh yeah, no, it's right there, and then he goes, there's only one more thing where the cop cuts him off.

• 2:51:26Speaker 08

  So you were on the ground with him, holding on to- Yep, I held on to him and said, until-

• 2:51:30Speaker 01

  Yeah, right there, the cop cuts him off, he doesn't wanna hear what he says anymore, he goes, so you were able to get him on the ground, he goes, got him on the ground, and I said to him, he goes, I, I, you had him on the grounds, like, stop telling us you're- I mean, it's the way this guy speaks, it's like, the Bushido code states that if, uh, the weapon is drawn, it must taste blood before put away.

• 2:51:46Joe Rogan?

  This is hilarious, white people fighting, that's what this is.

• 2:51:48Speaker 01

  It's hilarious, and it goes nowhere.

• 2:51:51Joe Rogan?

  Where, no one's going to the ground, what's going on? This is a lie. Oh, here, now they're on the ground.

• 2:51:56Speaker 01

  But he's like, I drug him on the ground, really, the husband drags him on the ground, technically.

• 2:52:00Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, it's a disaster.

• 2:52:03Speaker 01

  But tell us, my friend Justin Silver used to have my favorite joke about, uh, that kind of personality, though, he's like, he's like, because I'm a liar, he goes, I lie about everything. And he was like, uh, I'm the guy who like, you know, gets into a situation with somebody in the street, uh, and then I don't do anything, and then I go home, shadow box and call my friends and tell them all the things that I wish I did, like it actually happened. And his line was, if I did all the things I told my friends I did, my name would be Indiana Bon Jovi Balboa.

• 2:52:30Joe Rogan?

  When you're a kid, and you, uh, you have a situation like that happen, the rest of the day, you play it in your head, like, what I should have said.

• 2:52:38Speaker 01

  Oh, man, yeah.

• 2:52:39Joe Rogan?

  Oh, I wish I had another chance, I would have said, well, fuck you, because this and that.

• 2:52:43Speaker 01

  Oh, it's the worst, and when it goes away, yeah.

• 2:52:46Joe Rogan?

  Those internal dialogue things, like, for the rest of the day, what should I have said? And you, like, plot it out, and plan and scheme.

• 2:52:52Speaker 01

  I'll find him again one day.

• 2:52:53Joe Rogan?

  One day, I'm gonna tell him.

• 2:52:55Speaker 01

  I'll find that asshole, I've done dumb things, though, where it's like, I don't even, with no real trained preparation for any of these situations, but like, I also, when I, I always had a car, and when you're younger and have a car, it's destroying you financially, usually. Like, how much it costs to have a car, and everything, so it means a lot to you, no matter how shitty it is, when people would fucking hit my car, some, New York's a big thing with that, you know? You stop short, and a pedestrian just like, you know, slaps in front of your car or something.

• 2:53:23Joe Rogan?

  Dude, to this day.

• 2:53:24Speaker 01

  I would get irate by that.

• 2:53:25Joe Rogan?

  To this day, I think about one guy, I had a little Honda CRX, and I was driving in New York, and I was making my way into this intersection, and I got stuck in between lights, and then people started walking, and I tried to find, like, some space where I could not be in the intersection, and there was a nice gap, and so, people, this guy wasn't close to the car, so I started moving forward, and he whacks my fucking car with a briefcase, and...

• 2:53:51Joe Rogan?

  I was like, I'm gonna pull over, I'm gonna put this guy in the hospital. I had this, this crazy wild thought, like, I'm gonna pull over and I'm just gonna go smash this dude. And I said, no, just drive, just drive, just drive. And like, for years, I would think about that guy.

• 2:54:05Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:54:06Joe Rogan?

  For years, this arrogant cocksucker hitting my car with a fucking briefcase.

• 2:54:11Speaker 01

  I have, it's what, it's what, uh, unites me and Louis. We both have a, a crazy need for justice.

• 2:54:18Joe Rogan?

  It's such, it's why I like those stupid revenge movies.

• 2:54:21Speaker 01

  It's just, I just, it's justice, so it's that, it's the thing, it's like, the guy who did that thing, I have like a, I bet he won't do that anymore. I bet he won't do that anymore after I've sorted this situation out, but I mean, it's so dumb, like, I mean, and-

• 2:54:34Joe Rogan?

  It's a dude thing, too.

• 2:54:35Speaker 01

  Getting out of the car, uh, so I mean, one time, so early, when I was coming to New York, and I had my, what became my ex-wife, uh, we were just dating at the time, in a car, driving a Saturn, guy trying to impress two girls he's with, and he goes by, just like slaps the front of the car, and it stayed, and, and then they walk into Washington Square Park. And I, like, I'm just stewing in it. Like, I barked some shit out the window, no, no, for seconds. I'm stewing in it, and then I pull over with my new girlfriend, I go, wait here. And she goes, what? And then I begin to run after this guy into the park. What I'm not thinking about is as I'm running, when I finally find this guy on the other side of Washington Square Park,

• 2:55:20Speaker 01

  I turn around, dude, he could have pushed me over with a feather, I was like, what's up, motherfucker, you, you wanna fucking slap your ass? And luckily, I, I just scared him with my size, I guess, ultimately, or something, because like, he didn't do anything, but I was like, as soon as I got there and spun this guy around, I'm like, I'm done. I'm so exhausted from running, I never run. I sprinted to find him without thinking that I'm giving all my energy to that run, and I'm like,

• 2:55:43Joe Rogan?

  You need like a half hour to recover.

• 2:55:45Speaker 01

  He just fucking hit my car, man. And he was like, luckily, like, apologetic and like, whoa dude, I don't want any trouble, you're like, fuck ain't right, fuck ain't right, I don't want any trouble.

• 2:55:56Speaker 01

  It's a, I took ten extra minutes walking back to the car, leaving my girlfriend in the car, because, uh, I didn't want her to see how heavy I was breathing. I thought we'd get it all back together and just come back to the car and be like, scared that pussy.

• 2:56:10Joe Rogan?

  Such a dumb thing to do. Cause you could do it to the wrong guy.

• 2:56:15Speaker 01

  Of course, my instincts are terrible on it, cause I do, I don't get out thinking like, and then as soon as someone pull out a gun, I'd be like, none of this was worth it. Guy just slapped my car.

• 2:56:23Joe Rogan?

  Every now and then you'll see someone do something stupid and the person they're doing it to actually knows how to fight. Those are very satisfying.

• 2:56:29Speaker 01

  So satisfying.

• 2:56:30Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, there's a one with cops. Check the, uh, Terrence McKinney, UFC fighter.

• 2:56:36Speaker 01

  Sure.

• 2:56:36Joe Rogan?

  Put it up on his Instagram page today. So this cop tries a shitty double leg on this guy. And the guy knew how to fight and the guy sprawls and the cop tries to hit him and the guy cracks him. And the guy tries to tell him, hey, stop. And then the cop, watch this, like, look at the cop, shoots a shitty double, nice sprawl. Look at this, pushes him off, he's got him in a headlock, lets him go, cop punches, bam, drops him with one shot. Hits him a couple more times. Hits him again, rocks him. The cop is, the cop's getting rocked.

• 2:57:06Speaker 01

  Jesus Christ.

• 2:57:07Joe Rogan?

  And the guy wasn't doing anything, he was just arguing with the cops. I don't know if that was a cop, is that a cop?

• 2:57:13Speaker 01

  It's some kind of like security.

• 2:57:15Joe Rogan?

  Security, something, he's got a badge. And he's getting, wearing white gloves too. The gloves are, he gets his dukes up. Like both of them, he had some training, but he massively overestimated his ability. Like, look at this shitty double leg, let me see that, show me that shitty double leg again. Watch this shitty double leg, look at that, terrible, no drive at all. Scared of the concrete, so he's trying to double leg without his knees going to the ground. He doesn't want to really drive forward.

• 2:57:41Speaker 01

  There's a great video of a very in shape cop, and he's going at it with a teenager. Who's really talking shit. And he's like, he's like a wiggery kid doing like a, yo, man, what's up, take off that badge, you know what's up? Take off that badge, take off the vest, boy, you know what's up? And he just keeps going to him and the cops eventually like, hey, you keep balling up your fists, man, like, what are you doing? Just relax, like, I'm just, what are you doing here? I'm just seeing who everybody is, you know? He's like, yeah, you know what's up, pussy, take that vest, and he's, when he gets in his face one time, he just grabs him by the shoulders, puts his foot behind, I mean, places him on the concrete. And how fast the kid's like, oh, okay, whoa, we got a little nuts back there, huh?

• 2:58:17Joe Rogan?

  I saw that one. Yeah, those are fun. Well, kids are just.

• 2:58:20Speaker 01

  And fat women getting tasered, that's my other favorite thing.

• 2:58:22Joe Rogan?

  I bet that young man was under 25.

• 2:58:24Speaker 01

  Oh, no doubt.

• 2:58:25Joe Rogan?

  His brain was mush.

• 2:58:26Speaker 01

  No doubt. And then, but it was funny when they come to come back and they go, I was being crazy back there.

• 2:58:31Joe Rogan?

  That's why they send those young boys out to war.

• 2:58:33Speaker 01

  Cause they're all fucking piss and vinegar?

• 2:58:35Joe Rogan?

  All piss and vinegar with a non-fully deformed brain?

• 2:58:38Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 2:58:38Joe Rogan?

  Non-fully formed brain, they just fucking take that gun and here's some meth, let's fucking go!

• 2:58:43Speaker 01

  There was a guy in the audience last night, we did Story Warz at mothership and there was a guy in the front who's wears a brace around his body, like, we asked him why. Uh, he was stabbed in Afghanistan, hand-to-hand combat.

• 2:58:54Joe Rogan?

  Oh, Jesus.

• 2:58:55Speaker 01

  Cause it was a gunfight and it ended up being hand-to-hand combat. He said he beat, he knocked the guy down, didn't confirm that he was out. And then when he took his attention away, the guy reached up and said stabbed him.

• 2:59:05Joe Rogan?

  Oh.

• 2:59:06Speaker 01

  Right in the fucking chest, basically. It's pretty wild. And, uh, we were like, and we're looking at this guy, we go, in Afghanistan, what did he say? He was eighteen. He did happen, he was eighteen.

• 2:59:16Joe Rogan?

  Wow.

• 2:59:17Speaker 01

  I think he said sixteen-year-old was the kid, the kid who stabbed him was sixteen.

• 2:59:21Joe Rogan?

  Jesus Christ.

• 2:59:23Speaker 01

  Such a wild thing, it's intense.

• 2:59:26Joe Rogan?

  It's a little too intense. Don't get in fights, kids. That's our message, right?

• 2:59:29Speaker 01

  If you can avoid it.

• 2:59:30Joe Rogan?

  Absol- I've avoided all of them.

• 2:59:32Speaker 01

  I tried, I tried to, I got into a thing, a road rage thing, where I knocked a guy out. He wasn't very big. And I basically got out of the car and he was, right away, didn't wanna do anything. And I mushed his face. He was drunk and I kept mushing his face until he would throw a drunken punch. And then I hit him and I caught him. Only time in a fight in my life where I caught him, first shot, and he literally like folded on the ground. And then I got in my car, drove away with my current girlfriend Christine, and when we, uh, we got like a few blocks away, my, you know, my adrenaline started going down and I was like, and so jokingly almost, I just look at her and I, I kissed my bicep, like, one shot.

• 3:00:12Speaker 01

  And she goes, uh, she goes, she was like really pissed, like she didn't think it was funny or anything and I was like but it wasn't even like kinda hot that I just knocked that guy out one shot and she was like, no, like what if you killed him? Like his head bounced off the ground, like what, it's all for what? And I was like, that is a great point, I guess.

• 3:00:28Joe Rogan?

  It's a real good point.

• 3:00:29Speaker 01

  I'm like, what a great fucking point. Cause I mean, I'm walking away from that like, hey, I didn't even get touched. And, uh, I got sweet, beautiful justice, you know, the way I'm always searching for. And she was like, no, what if you killed him? And I'm like, yeah, there is a point there.

• 3:00:41Joe Rogan?

  I often think about that with that guy.

• 3:00:42Speaker 01

  About yourself getting killed, like what if you'd kill somebody?

• 3:00:44Joe Rogan?

  Oh, yeah, for sure. Yeah, you never punch somebody in the face on the concrete if you can. Like a good train fighter probably punching the body.

• 3:00:51Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 3:00:52Joe Rogan?

  Just because they don't want to go to jail forever. One of Kevin James' friends went to jail for like seven years. He was a bouncer at a nightclub in Long Island. Knocked a guy out, the guy falls, hits his head, dies. Happens.

• 3:01:04Speaker 01

  Yeah, but didn't Harry Houdini get killed from a gut shot?

• 3:01:07Joe Rogan?

  Something like that.

• 3:01:07Speaker 01

  Yeah, a punch to the stomach, he died days later.

• 3:01:10Joe Rogan?

  Yeah.

• 3:01:10Speaker 01

  Because like an organ busted. You never think about that. You want to give everything you got to a face punch and then you're like, "Boy, I sure hope I don't blind him forever." These are all things that could happen.

• 3:01:20Joe Rogan?

  All things that could happen. Alright Jake, I love you to death. Let's wrap this bitch up.

• 3:01:24Speaker 01

  Can I plug?

• 3:01:24Joe Rogan?

  Yeah, please do.

• 3:01:26Speaker 01

  My first half of Double Crowdwork special.

• 3:01:28Joe Rogan?

  Let's go.

• 3:01:28Speaker 01

  Them is currently out. Second half, They is coming out 4/20. All done at the Dunfer comedy works, so thank you.

• 3:01:37Joe Rogan?

  One of the best fucking clubs on earth. That club rules.

• 3:01:41Speaker 01

  That club is so great.

• 3:01:42Joe Rogan?

  It's so good.

• 3:01:42Speaker 01

  Well, you guys do the same thing. Everyone's facing forward.

• 3:01:44Joe Rogan?

  Yep.

• 3:01:45Speaker 01

  And yonder bags.

• 3:01:45Joe Rogan?

  Oh yeah, I thought about that when I was designing my club. I was almost gonna do the seats like she has them, where they're all locked down.

• 3:01:51Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 3:01:51Joe Rogan?

  Wendy's the best. Shout out to Wendy, we love her. Alright, thank you, brother.

• 3:01:54Speaker 01

  Thank you.

• 3:01:55Joe Rogan?

  Bye, everybody.