Moment 70 - How Jonny Wilkinson Made It To The Top

In these ‘Moment’ episodes of my podcast, I’ll be selecting my favourite moments from previous episodes of The Diary Of A CEO. This week’s moment is all about passion. Where to find it, how to nurture it, and how not to be afraid of it. Far too many people are afraid of just following their instincts to what makes them happiest and most fulfilled. Jonny Wilkinson doesn’t have time for any of that, or for following the expectations other people set. Jonny is interested in what makes you unique, and he thinks you should be too. Jonny’s also got a word of warning, though, because your real self is who you are when you’re alone with your own thoughts. And Jonny’s weren’t happy. He scaled as high as it’s possible to go in world rugby, but he found the process demoralising, and he wasn’t happy. It took Jonny a long time to find a way to be happy in his passion, but that makes his journey all the more interesting, and his advice for your journey all the more profound too. Listen to the full episode here - https://g2ul0.app.link/x7zSYKUwpsb Johnny: https://twitter.com/JonnyWilkinson?ref_src=twsrc%5Egoogle%7Ctwcamp%5Eserp%7Ctwgr%5Eauthor https://www.instagram.com/jonnywilkinsonofficial/?hl=en Watch the Episodes On Youtube - https://www.youtube.com/c/TheDiaryOfACEO/videos Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:02Steven Bartlett?

  There'll be people listening to this that are, you know, they left university, they went to school and now they're a lawyer and they've been a lawyer for 15 years. Or they might be, I don't know, dentist, now they've been a dentist for 20 years. And a lot of the time when I speak to these people, there's this other voice inside them that's been suppressed over time, which is probably all they can be. And they've got really consumed in this identity, which their like, parents wanted them to adopt of being a doctor or a lawyer, whatever it might be.

• 0:29Steven Bartlett?

  It, when I speak to these people, they are seemingly trapped by something. And that, that force that's trapping them seems to be so much stronger than the other voice, which is, which they sometimes can even point to as being a more fulfilling life, which is, I guess, all they can be. They want to go and be an artist. They speak to me before my show, they show me their Instagram and they're the most unbelievable artist I've ever seen in my life. And they, their face lights up when they talk about that thing. But when I ask them what they do, they say, yeah, I work in the city, I work in finance for like KPMG or something. And you can see the dread in their face.

• 1:00Speaker 01

  Yep.

• 1:00Steven Bartlett?

  How does someone start the journey? And I think you alluded to vulnerability there, but how does someone start the journey of going from that place of, you know, confinement and identity and I am this thing that I've earned through my achievements to being all I can be in a practical way? What's, how does that journey begin?

• 1:16Speaker 01

  I think that voice, that inner calling, as you just said, is, is passion and excitement versus the duty and the need and the fulfilling the, the roles, if you like, of society. And I think therefore, for me, the way that works is that you, you add to the passion and excitement constantly and allow that to look after your deepest intention, which is always, I want to spend, I think, all my time fully present, which means doing what I love doing, being who I feel like I'm meant to be, as much as that will keep evolving and changing. So therefore it comes down to.

• 2:01Speaker 01

  Following your highest passion and excitement in every moment. And people might argue straight away, well, how can I do that if I've got to be at work at seven in the morning and I've I've got to do this and I've got to go and traipse across town to get here. You say, yes, but within the boundaries of what you have to do, what's your highest excitement? Follow that. So, you know, I've got to drive across here and it's going to take me two hours and but then when you're in the car, tune in to what's my highest passion and excitement. I love this podcast. Okay, go. That's it. I really want to listen. I've got that. My hands free. I'm going to phone so and so because I just thought of them and I really want to chat to them. Follow that intuitive, instinctive, impulsive side that comes from what you want.

• 2:45Speaker 01

  And when that gains momentum, I think the way it works is that

• 2:53Speaker 01

  the universe responds by providing more and more opportunities to do more and more of what you like, so that you, your highest and passion and excitement, the environment allows for you to really do more and more of what you really love doing. But you've got to start the ball rolling by saying, right, within this moment right now, how can I, what's my highest passion and excitement? How can I be, how can I bring more of me into this as opposed to allow this to take away more of me? And I think that is a journey that just looks after itself, you know, it's on a physical level, it's the do what you, the little things you can do, set goals and allow them to, you know, what you focus on what you can do and allow it to expand and and

• 3:38Speaker 01

  grow into the most amazing things. It's the same way of just doing that on an internal level. It's just follow your highs. It might be physical. It might just be things I love thinking about. It's it even if it comes down to to being, you know, you're you're stuck in a lift and you're kind of like, and it's a tiny lift and you're going to be there for maybe for a while. Okay, but people talk about going to a happy place, but that's what's my highest passion and excitement. Oh, what I love to be doing now, paint it, picture it, think of it, dream it, feel it, all those kind of things. All these things are amazing things to be doing. And if you're following your highest passion, if you're enjoying and embracing this moment, I spoke to someone recently who was saying that, you know, to know you're on track for

• 4:21Speaker 01

  your future manifestations of your dreams, the the indicator is often how deeply are you embracing and enjoying this moment now.

• 4:31Speaker 01

  And once you find yourself loving this moment, it's amazing how much things just fall into place for you. And I think that's the key is to is to be able to say, whatever it is, whatever you can do, do it and bring it to this. And I think that voice that says, oh, I can't do this. I can't do that. It's not possible. I shouldn't do this. It's not right. Is another way of saying, I can't be me.

• 4:57Steven Bartlett?

  It's so interesting because when you were saying that, I was thinking about the former version of myself at eighteen, living in Manchester and Moss Side where, you know, I was very, I had nothing and I was shoplifting, as I've talked about a million times, food to feed myself. But in that moment, I was, although I was working in call centres at night shifts, I was so unbelievably excited by life because I was also designing my website, in my designing my future business, in my lunchtime, in my breaks of that call centre. And I've said this for years and I don't think people believed me, but I've said, I was as happy then as I am now. That kid was so optimistic and so happy, even though he was, he had no money and he was working night shifts in a call centre. And it sounds so privileged and like, obviously because of money now, whatever.

• 5:42Steven Bartlett?

  But it's resonated with so much of you were saying then, I think it's because of what you were saying then was I was still pursuing my highest passion, despite the fact that I was working in this call centre. I was still occupying all of my time and my thoughts that I could with that future. And that's what I believe manifested me being here because I could have made the decision that this was my destination and my forever. And I'd probably still be there now in Moss Side.

• 6:06Speaker 01

  Yeah, I definitely agree. The idea about following your highest passion, there is a passion, I think, deep down is for expressing who you are. And there's no doubt for me that rugby for that period of my life was what I was meant to do. That's how I was supposed to play out. That was, that was what I was supposed to be at that time.

• 6:30Speaker 01

  But then your passion changes slightly. And to be able to leave the rugby and follow that passion. Often I think people say, you know, it's really difficult to find my next passion. But I think having that that kind of ability to to leave behind what's been is what allows passion for what can be. And I think like we were saying before about wanting to you finish your rugby and then you think I'll go straight into coaching because it's close enough and people still know me and I still but actually to have that period of not just after an end of a career, but daily to have that quiet period every day where you just sit not with

• 7:14Speaker 01

  not with ideas, I'm going to think about this or I need to plan this or I need to work out what my passion is, but just sit and just disconnect from that pull of the external eyes closed and just watch. But of course, straight away comes in is, yeah, am I doing this right? What should be happening? Should I be feeling something? I haven't had any ideas. It's been two weeks and but just do it. Just do it in in the name of moving to your potential. Because we were so willing to to give to our limits. Look at how many years we spend suffering and telling ourselves certain things that have come from old ideas that no longer serve us. We're willing to give all our time to those. But people are still like, it's too hard to find 10 minutes to sit on an evening. What am I going to do?

• 7:58Speaker 01

  When actually, you know, you have that moment where you're sat watching something on TV and it's not really interesting and you're kind of like

• 8:05Speaker 01

  that's time there. But once that ball gets rolling, when your passion centers around something and everything comes out of that same passion, so it's all aligned, it's all kind of focused energy. That's going to manifest. There's no doubt, you know, like I'm sure at some level, there's no way you get to where you are now without there being that drive. Now, I had that in the rugby. And a lot of it was.

• 8:33Speaker 01

  Sort of conflict and it stressed the hell out of me, but it was so damn strong that it had to win. Because I wouldn't let it not win. I just didn't do it in a way that was enjoyable. Same. And now I think when you release the conflict, you get even more flow. You get an effortless version of what I've done through efforting. I've efforted heavily. Yeah, I heard that word recently. I really like it. I much prefer it than tried or given so much, but I've really made it a sort of an effort version of how to get to the top. And what that means is when I look back, it's like, how was it? I never smelt the roses. That's what most people say. Yeah, because there's another way to do it. And maybe that's how this has come out for you versus the first. I don't know, you know,

• 9:18Speaker 01

  like these projects for me, the next things I'm doing seem to just kind of, oh, there it is. That's interesting. Whereas before it was, ah, God, I've sort of get out of there. Don't you dare, whatever it is. I think that just comes from at some point just saying, well, okay, this is what I've got. Acceptance. And then what do I want to do right now? What's my next step responsibility? And you can't get to that passion without the acceptance. And the acceptance is this is what I've got. This is where I'm meant to be. This is how things are. And once I come to ease with that, then suddenly there is that, oh, I can start to feel what it is I want to do next. Yeah. But while there's that resistance to this, it shouldn't be this way. And should I be doing this or I'm elsewhere, future, past?

• 10:02Speaker 01

  Passion and excitement are kind of like, look, whilst you're trying to survive, we're not relevant to you. You know, someone in survival isn't really interested in passion and excitement. And I was in survival most of my career, hence why I keep saying about my career, you know, the passion and excitement died away, not because I lost, I fell out of love with rugby at all, not at all, just purely that I was in survival mode more and more and more. And the more I went into it, the less relevant creativity, growth, love, connection with teammates, excitement, passion, joy. It's just not relevant. Do you like?