Rewire Your Mind To Attract Abundance In Your Life TODAY with These 7 Keys

My life-changing annual event, The Summit of Greatness, is happening September 12 & 13, 2025. Get your ticket today! I'm about to share something that might sting a little, but could completely transform how you approach love and money. After years of chasing relationships and success from a wounded place, I discovered that the very way we pursue what we want is exactly why we can't have it. This isn't about working harder or wanting it more - it's about becoming the person who naturally attracts what you desire instead of desperately seeking it from a place of lack. By the end of this episode, you'll understand why everything you've ever wanted has always been yours, and how to finally align yourself to receive it. Make Money Easy: Create Financial Freedom and Live a Richer LifeThe Greatness Mindset: Unlock the Power of Your Mind and Live Your Best Life TodayThe Mask of Masculinity: How Men Can Embrace Vulnerability, Create Strong Relationships, and Live Their Fullest LivesThe School of Greatness: A Real-World Guide to Living Bigger, Loving Deeper, and Leaving a LegacyIn this episode you will:Discover why chasing love and wealth from neediness creates the exact opposite of what you want, and how to shift into magnetic embodiment insteadTransform your relationship with timing by releasing the desperate need for results right now and trusting divine alignmentBreak through the limiting language patterns that are literally blocking your abundance and replace them with empowering identity statementsUncover why you must heal your wounds before hunting for your next relationship or business opportunity, or you'll bleed on people who didn't cut youLearn how to build such a rich, purposeful life that anyone who enters simply enhances what you've already created instead of completing what's missingFor more information go to https://lewishowes.com/1813For more Greatness text PODCAST to +1 (614) 350-3960More SOG episodes we think you’ll love:Lewis Howes – greatness.lnk.to/1804SCDr. Joe Dispenza – greatness.lnk.to/1809SCDanny Morel – greatness.lnk.to/1785SC Get more from Lewis! Get my New York Times Bestselling book, Make Money Easy! Get The Greatness Mindset audiobook on SpotifyText Lewis AIYouTubeInstagramWebsiteTiktokFacebookX

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

  Greatness is Serving Transformation

• 0:03Lewis Howes?

  Fearlessness

• 0:04Speaker 00

  Progress Inspiration Ambition Being grateful for the here and the now.

• 0:09Lewis Howes?

  Real growth happens when you build a community. When you're in a room full of people who support you becoming your best self. And if that's something you're looking for, then make sure to join me at the Summit of Greatness, live at the iconic Dolby Theatre in Los Angeles, down in Hollywood, September 12th and 13th. We have some incredible speakers coming this year, like Gabby Bernstein, Brendon Bouchard, Dr. Tara Swart, and many more surprise guests and performers.

• 0:36Speaker 02

  I was very excited to come here and find my purpose, and I really think I have. Every speaker that came on today, I felt more and more inspired. The energy, there's just something in the air.

• 0:46Lewis Howes?

  Make sure to get your tickets right now at lewishouse.com/tickets. And I can't wait to see you at this year's Summit of Greatness.

• 0:58Lewis Howes?

  What if I told you that the way you are chasing love and success is the exact reason why you don't have either of them? And there are a few key things that you need to be thinking about in order to attract the things that you want. Because you'll never find love or wealth if you keep chasing it like this. And the first thing is to stop seeking and start embodying. Because you don't attract what you want, you attract who you are. It's a quote by Wayne Dyer, and I love that quote. Because you don't attract what we want in life, you attract who you are, what you embody, which, what you're made up of.

• 1:41Lewis Howes?

  The energy, the attitude, the thinking that you have. That's a reflection of what you attract in your life. And if you're ready to start creating the relationship, to start creating the financial abundance that you want in your life, make sure to like this video right now and leave a comment saying, "Yes, I'm ready," in the comments below right now. So you can start unlocking this embodiment for yourself.

• 2:10Lewis Howes?

  You want to stop searching for what you think you're missing? And start becoming someone who already has it. So instead of chasing after a love or a relationship, or chasing after money, or something external, we need to start to begin to embody the feelings associated with already having them. So what does this mean? How do I associate the feelings of already having a beautiful relationship? A partner who cares about me, a partner that speaks positivity into me, that supports my dreams, that supports me in becoming a greater version of myself, that supports me in staying healthy and doing healthy activities, that supports me and dives into my love language.

• 2:54Lewis Howes?

  So I feel loved and seen and validated. What does this mean to embody the feelings associated with already having something like that? What does it mean to embody the feelings of creating a wealthy life? Of having more financial opportunities, of people with money wanting to come hang out with me, wanting to surround themselves with me, wanting to teach me, mentor me, coach me for free, and start creating an opportunities of flow for financial abundance in my life? What does this mean to really embody the feelings associated with already having them?

• 3:32Lewis Howes?

  An example would be to feel grateful, feel gratitude, feel appreciation, as if you're already in a loving relationship, or you're already in a place of financial peace and freedom. And the way you can do this is to visualize your life from the destination, not toward it. Because a lot of times we're searching, we're seeking, and we're striving for something from a destinational place. And we're like, when I create this thing, when I have the relationship, then I'll feel loved, then I'll feel worthy, then I'll feel enough, then I'll feel ready to chase my dreams, ready to take on the next step, ready to step into this greater version of me.

• 4:15Lewis Howes?

  When I have the relationship, or when I have more money, then I can go do the things that I want to do and start to feel like I'm worthy of more. A lot of times, we are, we're not visualizing our life from the destination. And that's what we need to be doing. Not, um, once I get here, then I'll feel good about me. And this isn't crazy or delusional. It's aligning what you want with the energy that attracts it. So let me say it one more time. This is about aligning what you want with the energy that attracts that thing. And for many years, I was chasing the feeling of a relationship to try to feel better about me.

• 5:00Lewis Howes?

  I was chasing, building my business to try to feel like I was lovable and enough in life. And that people would see me and validate me. So I wanted to accomplish, I wanted to build a following based out of this wound or based out of the need or the desire of feeling a lack. And I accomplished those things. I was able to get into relationships. I was able to, um, build my business and make lots of money. But something felt off consistently. And it was because I was creating from a lack. I was creating from a, a wounded, needy place to feel like, okay, now I have this thing. I have this relationship. I have the business growing. Now I can start to feel better. But the feeling better never came.

• 5:45Lewis Howes?

  It didn't come until I, until I started to shift this mindset. The feeling better when I had the thing didn't actually happen. It actually made me feel more insecure, more scarce, more in lack. Because I felt like, oh, I don't feel what I thought I would feel by having this relationship, by having this money. Something's wrong with me, so let me go make more money. Let me go get more followers to try to fulfill this, this lack inside of me. And I did that for a long time in my twenties and thirties. And it took me a while to start breaking the pattern that was holding me back. You don't want to attract anything from a desperation, from neediness or a wound.

• 6:25Lewis Howes?

  You want to attract it from a state of being, a whole state of being that attracts peacefully. You also want to attract from a place where you feel like you can say no to everything that comes your way that is not in alignment with your purpose, your mission, or your greater self. Because when you create a sense of embodiment energetically.

• 6:50Lewis Howes?

  And the people that see that within you are going to be attracted to you. They're going to want to hang out with you. They're going to want things from you. They're going to want you to be a part of what they're up to because they want that energy. I don't know if you've ever experienced this in your life, where maybe you've gone to a workshop or you've gone to a yoga retreat or you've gone on a vacation for a week and you really just kind of got grounded. You were off your phone, you were learning something new. You were letting go of a limiting belief that used to hold you back. Or maybe you went through a breakup and a transformation. Or maybe you got let go from a job, but then you stepped into the thing you wanted to create. And you were creating from a sense of inspiration. You were creating from a sense of creativity.

• 7:33Lewis Howes?

  You were creating from a sense of freedom. You were walking around in life like you were meant to be there. I don't know if you've ever experienced this or you've been around someone like that. It is infectious. It is magnetic. It is like you want to be around that person and people want to be around you. If you know what I'm talking about, leave a comment, leave a yes in the comments and like this again, just to lock it in. Because once you realize that everything you ever want is already within you, you are going to start seeing love, seeing relationships, seeing money and opportunities come your way. It is going to be a flood, a river of abundance coming to you.

• 8:16Lewis Howes?

  And that's a beautiful thing, but it can be also overwhelming if you don't have the ability to create boundaries. If you don't have the ability to be discerning and slow down, because sometimes you want to say yes to everything because it all seems exciting. But then it gets you back into a place of, oh, I'm overwhelmed. I burnt out. I've said yes too quickly without actually getting to know the people. I fell in love too quickly in the first week or two without actually knowing about the person and just thinking of the idea of the person being amazing without actually seeing all of them. And so we need to learn discernment when we start to create from a place of peace and alignment.

• 8:58Lewis Howes?

  And when you can do that, then you can really say yes and no to the opportunities financially and relationally that makes sense for you. Because everything you've always wanted has always been yours. You are just finally realizing it when you start to align yourself to healing, peace and abundance. And you have to realize what it is you truly want. What is it that you want? Do you just want a relationship because you feel alone? And you want to feel a sense of love and find someone who can give it to you? That's not the best place to create from. But if you're feeling you want a relationship to amplify the joy, the love that you already feel within you. Now we are talking.

• 9:42Lewis Howes?

  Now you're you're creating from a space of feeling enough, feeling good with you. And you just want to amplify things. And then you can find someone who can mirror and match that alignment. As opposed to, I don't feel good and this person's going to make me feel better when I'm around them. That is a recipe for disaster because when you are choosing to be with someone because they make you feel better and you don't feel good with you. It's almost always going to be dysfunctional. There's always going to be a bad breakup because you're creating from a wound. You're bonding from a wound and people call that trauma bonding. And therefore it is so hard to unravel. And that's usually a two to three year relationship that gets entangled early on.

• 10:27Lewis Howes?

  Entanglement happens and you trauma bond. And from a place of bonding, you create connection. And connection is a beautiful thing. It's not that you don't want to create connection with other people. But if you're not creating a connection with yourself first. If you're not really building relationship with you and aligning with you and a vision for your life. Aligning with your finances, aligning with with your inner relationship. If you're not aligning and you only connect with someone out of fear or out of neediness or scarcity. Typically, there's gonna have to be some healing down the line. And you might hurt each other too much where you'll have to let go of the relationship at some point.

• 11:12Lewis Howes?

  I've learned this lesson, I don't know. I went through this process many times in many relationships. And it's painful, it's not fun, it's not enjoyable. And it takes a lot of time and energy from you creating from a space of peace. So, once you start to heal and align, then you can create from a space of peace in relationships and in your finances. So, to finalize this first key, train your nervous system to normalize the state you desire. This shifts your attraction point. And when you start to align your nervous system as a peaceful, safe space, you normalize that state you desire from peace.

• 11:57Lewis Howes?

  I am peace, and therefore I attract someone who brings more peace to my life. Not I am stressed, I am overwhelmed, and therefore I need to find someone to help me feel better about me. And that's going to attract from a wounded place. And typically, you're gonna have to do a lot more healing work in that relationship, or the relationship will end at some point in order for you to learn the lesson of healing, so that you can create again from a space of a calmer nervous system. So, that's the end of the first point for this. Stop seeking and start embodying. If this resonates with you, if this supports you, if this unlocks something inside of you,

• 12:39Lewis Howes?

  let me know in the comments to say that this is unlocking in something inside of me. And already in the first key, it's supporting your mission. The second key we're gonna talk about is letting go of the timeline. Let go of the need of having something right now. This is probably one of the hardest things. I have been known to be a very impatient person. It's a lesson I'm constantly learning in a space that I get to constantly step into.

• 13:10Lewis Howes?

  When you can let go of the timeline, so much will start to unfold and will start to accelerate for you. And a lot of times, we want things now. We want the relationship now. We want the healing now. We want the money now. But these things are meant to have their own timeline. You're not behind, so stop rushing a timeline that isn't yours. Needing results quickly is a form of lack. So I want you to trust in divine timing and release the sense of needing this goal to happen right now. It doesn't mean you don't have to create urgency in your life. It doesn't mean you're not supposed to work hard on a daily basis.

• 13:55Lewis Howes?

  You are. But needing the results to happen right now is going to only hurt you in the long run. It's going to make you more frustrated. You want to live in intentional alignment. And by doing this, things will come to you so much faster. You don't need things to happen right now because you are in alignment. And when you are in alignment, you feel like, I know this is going to come to me at the right timing, the right season, when I'm ready. And I just need to keep doing the reps, keep taking the actions, and keep showing God, the universe, my environment, people around me, that I'm ready for this thing. So instead of asking, when will I meet someone?

• 14:38Lewis Howes?

  Ask, how can I deepen my love for life today and my love for myself today? When you do that, again, you just become a magnet. Like, people like, want to introduce you to men and women around the world who think would be a great match for you. Because, man, you're showing this energy consistently. And it's not fake, false ego energy. It's like, I'm good with me. Sure, I would love a relationship, but I'm not going to get into a relationship if it's not the right timing and not the right fit. Because you don't want to just give your love to anyone who doesn't deserve it. You want to give all of your love to yourself and then pour that out in service of the people around you on a daily basis, whether it be at your Work, whether it be, you know, strangers walking down the street.

• 15:23Lewis Howes?

  And I'm not talking about, you know, loving someone on the romantic side of things. I'm just talking about loving someone with a smile, with a kind gesture, with a hello, and being a positive energetic force in your environment and in your world. But first, you have to do that in your inner world. You have to do the work to help you heal and know that you are enough, that you are lovable, that you're worthy of creating that relationship in your life. I'm going to give you a, an example from a business standpoint here. Early on in my career, I really wanted to be an author. I really wanted to write a book. I'd actually written a self-published book with another co-author of mine.

• 16:09Lewis Howes?

  And it was in 2009 when I wrote this book. And I remember being really excited to write this book. We printed it, we found the printer, we uploaded it on, on Amazon. We did all this work and then I would buy hundreds, hundreds of these books at a time in boxes. And I would sell them one by one as I was hosting these kind of networking events around the country. I did 20 events within the country, um, within about 12 to 14 months. And I would go around the country with boxes of books and I'd sell them one by one. And I remember thinking, gosh, wouldn't it be amazing to be a, a traditionally published author? And if I'm dreaming big here, wouldn't it be amazing if I was a New York Times bestselling author? Wouldn't that be just be incredible?

• 16:54Lewis Howes?

  It was like this incredible big goal that I had, this dream that I had, that was a desire of mine. And we should all be dreaming about what we want. This is not a bad thing to desire something. But when we do it from a place of, I need this right now, uh, it's probably not going to work out for us. Long story short, I, I met, uh, Tim Ferriss's agent early in my career. And I was like, hey, I'd love to do a book with you. And I was kind of pitching this to him. But at the time, I had a very small following. My business wasn't doing what it is today. And I wasn't ready, just, long story short, the timing didn't line up for where I was at in my life and where I wanted to be. I wasn't ready.

• 17:40Lewis Howes?

  And he was like, hey, you know, you're not ready. Essentially, he told me that. And I remember kind of feeling down. I was like, I really want this thing. I want it to happen now. And wouldn't this be amazing for my ego? All these different things. But essentially, I said, all right, I'm going to work on who I need to become. And when the timing happens, it'll happen at the perfect timing. And years go by, three and a half years go by. And I just say, I'm going to start working on myself every day. I'm going to keep working on myself, developing skills, building my audience, learning about business better, learning how to write better, learning about marketing better, all these skills I still need to master, public speaking better, everything. How can I build relationships for the right people to promote me when the book is ready?

• 18:25Lewis Howes?

  Cause I was doing one by one book sales. And I only sold a few hundred copies of my book in the first year. So I wasn't ready. I didn't have the platform. I didn't have the relationships. I needed the skill sets. I needed to be ready to be on TV and do press. I needed all this. I need all these things to happen before the next big book. And five years later, essentially, he finally comes to me and says, hey, I think it's time we do a book together. And he reached out to me because we connected on social media and he saw the journey that I was creating, where now the timing was lining up. And I did a massive book deal. We went out and sold the book. I did a massive book deal.

• 19:09Lewis Howes?

  I launched the book. Now my platform, my audience, my skills, my, my confidence within myself was just light years ahead because I'd done the reps and I'd taken the action. And by the time the book came out, it hit the New York Times bestseller list. And it was a big hit. Later, because of that book, I got on the Ellen Show. I got tons of press, Good Morning America, Today Show. All these things lined up at the perfect timing. Now, five years prior, I really wanted that thing, but I wasn't ready for it. And I don't know if you've ever had this feeling where you like really want something. Maybe right now you're like, I really want this thing to happen for me. If I could get on talk shows or big press or launch a big platform.

• 19:53Lewis Howes?

  But maybe you're just not ready for it at this moment. It doesn't mean you won't be ready for it in the future. And so it's important to create goals. It's important to have these dreams and a vision. But we've got to be willing to take the actions every day and be in alignment with what we want and where we're at. And the timeline that you're obsessing over is often the very block to what you desire. So I want you to start shifting this energy, this timeline. It doesn't mean you can't create something faster, but I want you to be creating from a place of, I have this goal and I, yes, I want it to happen in six months, but it may not happen.

• 20:35Lewis Howes?

  And I don't want to get let down because it's not happening right now. Instead, focus on what you can control, how you can show up, developing more skills. That by the time you're ready for it, this will come to you. Another thing is when I was broken on my sister's couch, I had a mentor that I was working with. And I was like, man, I could really use some money right now. And he said, money comes to you when you're ready for it. I was like, I'm pretty ready to receive some money. I'm pretty broke, like I'm ready. And it wasn't until about a year and a half, two years later, I actually started making money about a year and a half, two years after that. And I reflected back and I was like, oh, had I made a lot of money back then,

• 21:17Lewis Howes?

  when I was emotionally bankrupt, I would have blown this money. I would, I was not ready for it. And that's the hardest thing to say when you're broke and living in scarcity. You, you don't want anyone to say this to you. You're just like, shut up, give me money. I don't want to hear it. I need this money. And there's a difference from needing something and then being ready for something. You might need something because you feel like you're living in fight or flight mode or, or survival mode. But when you're ready for something, it's because you put in the reps. You've started to come from a, a more of a patient place. It doesn't mean you're not living in urgency and taking the actions. But you're okay with the timeline being when you're ready. And this is hard. You've got to really be trusting.

• 22:01Lewis Howes?

  God, the universe, whatever you believe in, you've got to be trusting. Okay, I'm going to keep doing the reps and I'm going to keep adding value to people around me. And I'm going to keep showing up and eventually good things will happen. But if you're coming from a place of, I need this now. Usually you're not going to get what you want, otherwise you'll sabotage it. So the timeline you're obsessing over is often the very block to what you desire. And this is let go of the timeline number two. The third thing is to replace lack language with empowering identity. Your problem isn't others holding you down.

• 22:43Lewis Howes?

  It's your language blocking your abundance. It's your language that is blocking your abundance. I want you to write down a few limiting phrases that you say often. And this is going to help unlock something for you. I want you to write them down. You can put them in the comments if you want to below and say, here are some of my limiting phrases. And then I want you to reframe them into empowering truths. So some of the limiting phrases that people say are, I'm not smart enough. I'm not good enough. I'm not good looking enough. I don't have enough connections. I don't live in the right environments. My parents hold me back, whatever it is, I am not what?

• 23:26Lewis Howes?

  Write that down as a limiting thing that you've said in the past. Because your words shape your reality. They shape them. They shape your personality, which is your personal reality. What Dr. Joe Dispenza says. And so the more you speak something as I am not this. You are that thing. You are embodying that thing. So you're out of alignment with what you want, with what you desire by speaking those false truths. And I am the poster child for speaking negative self-talk about me to myself and to

• 24:06Lewis Howes?

  others most of my childhood, most of my teen years, twenties, and it probably wasn't until my early thirties where I started to make that shift. And so if you're in your twenties or your teens or your thirties right now, you know, it's not the end of the world because you can start shifting this now and start aligning to more positive self-talk. Again, your words shape your reality. So I want you to replace I'm broke, or I'm unlucky in love, or I'm unlucky with money, or any of these limiting thoughts to something else like I'm learning to manage wealth, or I am healing and preparing for conscious love.

• 24:50Lewis Howes?

  So instead of saying I'm unlucky with love, or all guys hurt me, or all guys leave me and abandon me, or all girls just ruin my life, whatever it is, I am healing and preparing for conscious love. When you start saying these things, it doesn't mean you're saying some false affirmation that you're shouting at the rooftops of I'm worthy of all this love and perfect relationship. You may not feel that. You may not be ready for that. But you can be ready for I'm healing, I'm learning, and I'm preparing for conscious love. Man, what a, what a space to create from. What a, what an empowering place to

• 25:33Lewis Howes?

  speak into existence versus huh, I'm just never gonna figure this relationship stuff out. Every relationship hurts me. Everyone cheats on me. Everyone lies to me. I mean, I used to say the most horrible things to myself, you know, that I would never amount to anything, that people always abandoned me or abused me. I just, and then I would recreate that in life because your personality creates your personal reality, as Dr. Joe Dispenza says. So your identity evolves through your vocabulary. And I want you to speak your future into the now. So I want you to replace lack language with empowering identity. That's a big step for all of us. Again, I get this constant reminder for myself, but

• 26:18Lewis Howes?

  it's a big step for all of us. Number four. Heal before you hunt. Heal before you hunt. You're not being rejected. You're being redirected to heal. You're not being rejected. You're being redirected to heal. If you don't heal what hurts you, you'll bleed on people who didn't cut you. Ooh, that's a zinger. I love that quote from Isabella De Bruno, who's the author of A System of Deception. If you don't heal what hurts you, you'll bleed on people who don't cut you. And again, I've probably done this too many times in the past. The people that I felt picked on me

• 27:03Lewis Howes?

  or abused me or took advantage of me from childhood stuff. I felt like I let that anger get the best of me and I reacted in situations and environments when I probably didn't need to react. And until I started to heal, I started doing less of that. So chasing wealth or love from a wounded place leads to sabotage. And I want you to prioritize emotional healing first. An example of this could be something about the past within you. If that's, that that past betrayal still hurts you. I want you to pause and process it before entering a new relationship or business venture. So if you feel like a previous, you know, boss screwed you over or a previous employee screwed you over or a previous relationship,

• 27:48Lewis Howes?

  you know, ended things with you or lied to you or hurt you in ways that really are still painful today. Don't just jump into the next thing without processing it before you enter a new relationship or business venture. If you do that too quickly, you're likely to bring the wound with you into the future and just be more guarded from a wounded place rather than being discerning from a healed place. And there's a difference between guarded and discerning. And when you're guarded, you typically it's because you've been hurt and you're still wounded. And so you're clinching. You're not trusting. You're not engaging. You're not expressive and open, loving and joyful because you're worried that someone's going to repeat

• 28:32Lewis Howes?

  what something else happened in the past. This is in relationships, business, friendships, all these different things.

• 28:40Lewis Howes?

  So when you pause and start to heal, then you could be discerning. You can still bring love, joy, excitement, gratitude to a potential relationship or a business opportunity. But you're not going to say yes, because you want a people please out of a wound. You're going to be discerning and say no, if something doesn't align with the embodiment that you desire and you currently are. And you're going to start to see the difference. You're not going to have to say yes to everyone right away. So the key takeaway is a healed vessel attracts sustainably. A leaking one repels even the good. Key number four, heal before you hunt. Key number five, seek wholeness, not validation.

• 29:25Lewis Howes?

  Gosh. Man, I don't know, not a times that I seeked validation in my entire childhood. I don't even know. I mean, every time I did that, I'd be like, uh, you know, if I got a dollar for every time I seeked validation in some type of moment or opportunity, I'd be a mega millionaire at this moment, because it was just something I always felt like I needed to do. Is the attention, the validation, am I good enough? Do people like me? All that people pleasing is freaking exhausting. Love won't complete you. But when you feel complete, love flows in effortlessly. Love won't complete you, but when you feel complete, love flows in effortlessly.

• 30:06Lewis Howes?

  True love and abundance flow to those who are already whole.

• 30:13Lewis Howes?

  True love and abundance flow to those who are already whole, not those seeking to be completed. And if we're seeking something to feel enough, again, going back to the beginning of this conversation, to feel like now we're complete, now we're ready, all these different things. Then we're just going to be creating from a wounded place and it's going to be hurting us along the way. So I want you to build a life so rich in purpose, so rich in joy, so rich in a presence of being that anyone or anything that joins it simply enhances your life, they don't complete it.

• 30:52Lewis Howes?

  I want you to build a rich, purposeful, loving, expressive life with you first, so that everyone else around you amplifies, adds to this. There's an example that Martha told me early on. She goes, "My happiness should never be dictated based on what you do or you don't do. You should add to my happiness. I want to come into this relationship happy and whole, and you just bring me more joy, more like opportunities to amplify and expand my love and joy for myself and life." And we do that for each other. Like she doesn't need to do anything to make me happy. Sure, she can add to my happiness.

• 31:36Lewis Howes?

  She can support me in challenging times. But if I'm unhappy and I need her to make me happy, the relationship is wounded, I'm wounded. And it doesn't mean I'm some horrible person. Like, we all go through seasons like this. But it's just not going to create the best version of love, the best version of business in this space if we're creating from a place of needing something to make us feel a certain way. So the key action is that attraction is magnetic when you're not depending on anyone or anything to fill a void. Again, attraction is magnetic when you don't need anyone to fill a void.

• 32:19Lewis Howes?

  Stop seeking validation. Seek wholeness, not validation.

• 32:28Lewis Howes?

  Key number six is to practice energetic integrity. The future you dream of won't arise if you keep acting like it's not yours. And the tip on this is that every action should reflect the version of you who already has what you desire. So what does this mean for you? If you want to be wealthy, don't cheat, hoard, or act from a place of scarcity. If you want love, don't ghost, or lie, or manipulate. One of the biggest lies that they have told you is that there is not enough for everyone. That resources are limited.

• 33:10Lewis Howes?

  And instead, we should be thinking about collaboration over competition. We should be thinking about community over isolation. And we should be really diving into shared knowledge over keeping everything to yourself. And the key takeaway here is that integrity calibrates your frequency to your desires. Misalignment repels all of it. So we've got to be thinking about integrity. And there's so many times in my life where I lived out of micro integrity moments. Little white lies, hiding things, you know, holding back on certain things, whatever it might be.

• 33:50Lewis Howes?

  And for whatever reason, that always created more of a frequency of stress and fear and anxiety. Because I was out of integrity with myself. And the more I'm in alignment with my integrity, gosh, things just flow better. And you just, you don't have to worry about anything because you know you're good with you. So that's the key right there. Integrity calibrates your frequency to your desires. So the key is to practice energetic integrity. When you create that alignment energetically inside of you, gosh, you just become unshakable. You become unfazed by what's happening. It doesn't mean you're not going to feel frustrated at times. You're not going to have challenging moments.

• 34:33Lewis Howes?

  But overall, you just feel like you're good with you. And I want you to be good with you because then you're going to be good with other people. And you're going to make better, wiser decisions in love, in relationships, and in business in your career. And the seventh key is to make space, then stay ready. The universe doesn't respond to need, it responds to knowing. You don't just want love or wealth. You want to make space for it physically, emotionally, and mentally. And when you start to do that, the right things will start to come to you effortlessly. So an example might be, you know, to clean out your closet for a partner, to set up saving systems as if money is already flowing.

• 35:18Lewis Howes?

  And this is a great example for my wife Martha as well. Before she met me, she was going on her own healing journey. She was healing, she was creating a sense of inner peace and inner freedom. She had gone through different relationships that didn't work out and realized that she was at the center of all of it. And the things that were hurting her were the things that she was lacking within herself that she needed to heal and create wholeness around. And so she went through many, many months of therapy and going on trips by herself and with friends and reconnecting to the creative person inside of her, the loving person inside of her, the person that was fearless again.

• 36:00Lewis Howes?

  And she got to that space of feeling whole, feeling good with her, not needing someone, but wanting someone if it was the right timing and the right person. And she was moving into a new space. She was energetically shifting things. She got rid of old stuff. She got, she moved into a new space alone and was creating that space for herself. And she had a moment where she was at the store buying furniture. And she was about to buy a bed. Now she's tiny, right? She's like five two, she's very petite. She could fit in a twin and it'd feel like, you know, a master bedroom bed, right? But something inside of her said, huh?

• 36:41Lewis Howes?

  If I'm creating a, if I'm buying a twin bed, I'm creating a space that's only meant for me. Even if that's what I want right now, I know I want to create from a place of having space for a king in my life. And so she went from not buying a twin sized bed to buying a massive king sized bed because she said, if I want to attract a king in my life or a healthy partner in my life, I need to make space so that's available. And she bought a king sized bed. And a few months later, maybe it's three, four, five months later, I showed up in her life, she showed up in my life organically in a healthy, beautiful way.

• 37:23Lewis Howes?

  And she told me that story, you know, after we started dating, she was like, you know, I bought this king bed because I was waiting for you. And I was waiting for you at the right season and the right timing when I was ready to attract you. And I go, wow, what a beautiful story, you know? You could have had a twin and we could have been snuggling together on top of each other in this little tiny bed. But now I get to sleep in a little bit more peace. We can still snuggle and connect, but then I can spread out because I'm a big guy. Six, four, I'm a big guy and I need that space. So she was thinking ahead of her future self, what her future self needed at the right season, the right timing of life. And what to attract with creating space. So if you really want love and you say, I'm not ready for a relationship.

• 38:07Lewis Howes?

  And you tell all your friends, I'm just going to be single. I'm not ready for a relationship. I don't want a relationship, but deep down you truly want love. Then you will attract people who are not ready for a relationship. And you'll probably get into a relationship over time because you truly do crave connection and intimacy and and and fun with others and friends and loving intimacy and romance. You want that. But even though you say, nah, I don't want that, but deep down you do. So if you get into a relationship from that space of nah, I'm not ready. Then you're going to attract someone who also isn't ready. And you're probably just going to use each other until it unwinds. It either entangles or it unwinds. And then eventually you're going to be like, what are we doing?

• 38:49Lewis Howes?

  And I've done that way too many times, so I know the pain that that comes from that. And again, money comes to you when you're ready for it. A relationship comes to you when you're ready for it. The right opportunities and your dreams come to you when you are ready for it. Your environment reflects your readiness. So prepare like it's on the way. This is number seven, make space, then stay ready. You are perfectly set up. You're perfectly ready to attract the love, the relationship, the money that you want. It's all within you, but you have to be willing to do the healing work so that you can align

• 39:32Lewis Howes?

  what you want with the timing of your life. And maybe the timing right now is that you're not ready to have the big dream, the big desire, the big relationship that you want for a long time, whether you want an accomplishment or you want a romantic partner. It took me thirty seven, thirty eight years until I met my wife. And I just wasn't emotionally ready. I wasn't emotionally aligned because I was afraid of doing the healing work. I'd done healing work in other areas of my life, but not in relationships. Same thing around money and business. I was creating a business. I was urgently going for money out of a wound of not wanting to be broke. And I made a lot of money, but then I would make

• 40:15Lewis Howes?

  sabotages and it was still living in scarcity at times because I felt like, ah, if I don't do more now, then I'll always go back to broke. I made poor financial decisions based on that fear and those insecurities. So I just created more stress than needed in both relationships and love and money and business. And I don't want you to make the same mistake. So I want you to share below in the comments, which one of these seven keys speaks to you the most in your life right now? Which one do you need to step into? Right below, which one, one through seven, is the most important thing for you? And then I want you to take action on this. I want you to step

• 40:54Lewis Howes?

  into it and take action on it every single day this week and start creating from a space of wholeness, of enough, and of feeling ready for it in the right time. Because you'll never find love or wealth if you keep chasing it like you've been chasing it in the past.

• 41:15Lewis Howes?

  And these seven keys are going to support you in attracting love and wealth from a healthy space where you can sustain it for years to come. If you enjoyed this episode and this video, like this video, leave a comment, subscribe to our YouTube channel, subscribe over on Apple and Spotify. I'm grateful for you and I can't wait to see you in our next episode. I hope you enjoyed today's episode and it inspired you on your journey towards greatness. Make sure to check out the show notes in the description for a full rundown of today's episode with all the important links. And if you want weekly exclusive bonus episodes with me personally, as well as ad-free listening,

• 41:58Lewis Howes?

  then make sure to subscribe to our Greatness Plus channel exclusively on Apple Podcasts. Share this with a friend on social media and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts as well. Let me know what you enjoyed about this episode in that review. I really love hearing feedback from you and it helps us figure out how we can support and serve you moving forward. And I want to remind you, if no one has told you lately, that you are loved, you are worthy, and you matter. And now it's time to go out there and do something great.