Josh Safdie

Filmmaker Josh Safdie feels like a liar saying he feels anything about being Conan O’Brien’s friend. Josh sits down with Conan to discuss showcasing Adam Sandler’s dramatic chops in Uncut Gems, prioritizing the casting of real-world characters in his work, and watching Timothée Chalamet transform into a ping-pong champion with his latest hit film Marty Supreme. Plus, Conan issues a bold proclamation to Erewhon’s smoothie department. For Conan videos, tour dates and more visit TeamCoco.com. Got a question for Conan? Call our voicemail: (669) 587-2847.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:02Conan O'Brien?

  Now Sona, clearly I'm a very important person to you.

• 0:05Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 0:05Conan O'Brien?

  Just accept the premise and we'll move ahead.

• 0:07Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 0:08Conan O'Brien?

  I'm a very important person to you. What would you get me from Macy's for the holidays?

• 0:13Speaker 01

  A vase.

• 0:15Conan O'Brien?

  No, I don't want a vase. I want something better.

• 0:17Speaker 01

  A jacket.

• 0:19Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, nice jacket. I love a nice jacket.

• 0:20Speaker 01

  Oh yeah, that jacket. Nice jacket.

• 0:22Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, so now you have to do it, because you said you would.

• 0:23Speaker 01

  Aw man, I didn't know you were doing that.

• 0:25Conan O'Brien?

  Well, I know the holidays, I know the holidays are months away, but it's never too early, Sona, to find gifts that I will love, gifts I will wear, and surprises that make the season unforgettable for me.

• 0:37Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 0:37Conan O'Brien?

  Macy's Gift Guide makes holiday shopping easy with beauty favorites, stylish fashion, jewelry, cozy essentials, must-have toys, home upgrades, and picks for every person on your list. Coach handbags, Breville appliances, Lego UG, and more, all in one place so you can skip the scrolling and shop with confidence. Shop now in-store or online at macy's.com/giftguide.

• 1:03Conan O'Brien?

  You looking for something sweet and satisfying?

• 1:04Speaker 01

  Always.

• 1:05Conan O'Brien?

  Meet Wonderful Pistachios Chocolate Sea Salt and Chocolate Toffee, your go-to treats.

• 1:11Speaker 01

  Mmm.

• 1:11Conan O'Brien?

  Each pistachio is thinly, not thickly, thinly dipped in dark chocolate antioxidant goodness.

• 1:19Speaker 01

  The way you said that, thinly and thickly was uncomfortable.

• 1:22Conan O'Brien?

  It doesn't overwhelm the pistachio. They know what they're doing. I'm so glad they made the right choice.

• 1:28Conan O'Brien?

  Or discover Wonderful Pistachios Dubai Chocolate, the sweet indulgence you didn't know you needed with rich dark chocolate, smooth white chocolate, crispy katafi, and a delicious crunchy pistachio. I'm telling you, snack time never tasted so good.

• 1:42Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:42Conan O'Brien?

  Look it up in history. It never has. Never has.

• 1:46Speaker 01

  Can you?

• 1:46Conan O'Brien?

  Check out wonderfulpistachios.com to learn more about Wonderful Pistachios chocolate products.

• 1:55Speaker 02

  Hi, my name is Josh Safdie and I feel like a liar.

• 2:01Speaker 02

  Saying that I feel anything about being Conan O'Brien.

• 2:28Conan O'Brien?

  Hey there, welcome to Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend. I'm the aforementioned Conan, joined by Sona Movsesian, Matt Gourley. How we doing, gang? What's happening? Good.

• 2:35Speaker 01

  Good, good, good in the hood.

• 2:36Conan O'Brien?

  What's the mood? What's the mood today? Mood's pretty good, I'd say. Yeah? Yeah? No, am I wrong?

• 2:41Speaker 01

  No, it's pretty good.

• 2:42Conan O'Brien?

  I don't know, I'm just, I like to get the vibe in the room. I like to match the temperature. And I wasn't sure today. You all seemed pretty happy, right? Yeah.

• 2:53Speaker 01

  I wish I ate more.

• 2:54Conan O'Brien?

  What do you mean?

• 2:55Speaker 01

  I just didn't eat a proper meal before and we're recording, it's like almost 2 o'clock and I'm hungry.

• 3:01Conan O'Brien?

  What is a proper meal for you? What would that be? What did you have for breakfast?

• 3:05Speaker 01

  Literally any food in front of me.

• 3:06Conan O'Brien?

  What did you have for breakfast?

• 3:07Speaker 01

  I didn't have breakfast.

• 3:08Conan O'Brien?

  You didn't eat breakfast?

• 3:08Speaker 01

  That's the problem.

• 3:09Conan O'Brien?

  Okay, all the years that Sona was my assistant, I lived in fear of her not getting her sustenance. Because her mood would go. No, no, you would be, you would become the Tasmanian devil. You really would.

• 3:22Speaker 01

  No, I know.

• 3:22Conan O'Brien?

  If you didn't get your food. And another person who does that is my wife.

• 3:25Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 3:26Conan O'Brien?

  My wife, I learned when we were early on going out, she would say, "Getting a little hungry, what are you thinking about lunch?" And I would think, "Yeah, yeah, we could do lunch." I learned that I need to act on that first warning sign.

• 3:42Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 3:43Conan O'Brien?

  Because she's a lithium battery. I see. She goes from having a charge to having no charge instantly.

• 3:49Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 3:49Conan O'Brien?

  And so then it would go downhill very quickly.

• 3:53Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 3:53Conan O'Brien?

  And so, and you're the same way, Sona.

• 3:55Speaker 01

  I pack snacks for my kids all the time, but then I'll eat them. Because if I don't eat, but also...

• 4:02Conan O'Brien?

  Can I say something else? Your kids are malnourished.

• 4:05Speaker 01

  Yeah, they are, they're not eating.

• 4:05Conan O'Brien?

  You're constantly eating their snacks. The oxygen mask in an airplane where you gotta take care of yourself first?

• 4:10Speaker 01

  Yeah, but Liza can live off of like an almond. I need like a whole...

• 4:16Conan O'Brien?

  Pheasant.

• 4:18Speaker 01

  What?

• 4:20Conan O'Brien?

  It is true.

• 4:21Speaker 01

  Like a rotisserie chicken.

• 4:22Conan O'Brien?

  No, she would... I can't tell you how many times on the Warner Brothers lot, Sona was screaming at the commissary people, "I want my pheasant."

• 4:34Conan O'Brien?

  Remember? And then we got you a crown and a king's robe.

• 4:37Speaker 01

  And a scepter.

• 4:38Conan O'Brien?

  And a scepter.

• 4:39Speaker 01

  And a throne, yeah, I remember.

• 4:41Conan O'Brien?

  "I want my pheasant!"

• 4:43Speaker 02

  Where's my hosen feather?

• 4:45Conan O'Brien?

  So, uh, so you didn't get enough food.

• 4:48Speaker 01

  No, I didn't. I need to eat something after this.

• 4:51Conan O'Brien?

  I saw you eating potato chips before, just before we recorded.

• 4:54Speaker 01

  I, I know. I've been snacking. I understand.

• 4:57Conan O'Brien?

  That wasn't an accusation.

• 4:58Speaker 01

  It felt like you were accusing me of saying you ate chips, so you're fine.

• 5:02Conan O'Brien?

  No, I'm not, because there's no nutrition in the... Oh, wait, there were pheasant chips.

• 5:05Speaker 01

  There were.

• 5:06Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. Now, it said now with 80% more pheasant, so I don't know why you're bitching.

• 5:09Speaker 01

  I need like a meal. I need something warm that was cooked and I need it in my body. Like, I need, I need a lot. What are you gonna get after this, then? Are you gonna go straight to a restaurant, just by yourself and corner table? I might, I might. I need to eat. You all both need to eat. Yeah.

• 5:25Conan O'Brien?

  Uh, yeah, I need to eat something that gives you more intelligence.

• 5:30Speaker 01

  Ooh, walnuts.

• 5:31Conan O'Brien?

  Not just brain food, but food that actually is made of brain and gives you brain.

• 5:35Speaker 01

  Did you say walnuts?

• 5:36Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 5:37Speaker 01

  Walnuts make you smarter?

• 5:38Conan O'Brien?

  Brain food.

• 5:39Speaker 01

  Walnuts make you smarter? They do. Walnuts make you smart. Yeah. It's good for your semen.

• 5:46Conan O'Brien?

  What?

• 5:47Speaker 01

  It's walnuts.

• 5:48Conan O'Brien?

  Wait, hold it.

• 5:48Speaker 01

  You and I are coming at this from different angles.

• 5:50Conan O'Brien?

  Hold it, hold it, hold it. You, I'm pointing the finger at you, Sona. What do you mean it's good for your semen? What are you talking about?

• 5:56Speaker 01

  Like, you know, when you wanna make a baby, you eat a lot of walnuts. No, nobody? Tell me about it. Are you serious?

• 6:03Conan O'Brien?

  Wait, are you talking about it's good for your semen, meaning that it makes better semen?

• 6:08Speaker 01

  I don't, I don't know what it does. Like stronger semen? I just know if you want, if you wanna make a baby.

• 6:14Conan O'Brien?

  Here we go, here we go.

• 6:14Speaker 01

  According to the internet...

• 6:15Speaker 02

  It improves motility.

• 6:16Speaker 01

  Hello. Hello.

• 6:18Speaker 03

  It's your semen.

• 6:20Speaker 02

  And morphology.

• 6:21Speaker 01

  Yeah, come to me for semen advice.

• 6:24Conan O'Brien?

  Well, okay.

• 6:24Speaker 03

  Come to me for semen advice? Jesus Christ, Sona.

• 6:27Speaker 01

  It's good if you want to make a baby.

• 6:29Speaker 03

  Now, there are foods that-

• 6:30Speaker 01

  Low motility.

• 6:31Conan O'Brien?

  Aren't there foods that affect the taste of semen?

• 6:33Speaker 03

  Well, I think, is that a myth? Pine- they say pineapple, right? Is supposed to help it taste better? I mean, I say that.

• 6:40Conan O'Brien?

  I- Can I just say something? I can't taste the difference.

• 6:45Speaker 03

  I can't.

• 6:45Conan O'Brien?

  I've had, I ate tons of pineapple. And then I'm like, I gotta get any pineapple here!

• 6:51Speaker 03

  What, you're drinking your own semen?

• 6:53Conan O'Brien?

  Of course, I'm not gonna eat someone else's junk.

• 6:55Speaker 01

  What was that?

• 6:56Speaker 03

  Airwan to make a smoothie with your name on it.

• 6:58Conan O'Brien?

  Yes.

• 6:59Speaker 03

  Oh, no.

• 7:00Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. I'm not gonna, someone else's semen, that's disgusting!

• 7:05Conan O'Brien?

  Why do you think I do all those back exercises?

• 7:08Speaker 03

  Such a narcissist. You only drink your own semen.

• 7:10Conan O'Brien?

  I'm constantly doing yoga and I'm like, I'm almost there! Uh, anyway, no, I've had so much pineapple, nothing!

• 7:18Speaker 01

  Oh, God.

• 7:19Speaker 03

  I have never held up a rap sign more.

• 7:21Speaker 01

  Rap, rap!

• 7:21Conan O'Brien?

  Well, listen, I think it's time to talk to an iconic filmmaker.

• 7:29Conan O'Brien?

  Every publicist right now is taking us off the list.

• 7:32Speaker 01

  Oh, God!

• 7:33Conan O'Brien?

  My guest today is a filmmaker known for such movies as Uncut Gems and Good Time. His latest film, Marty Supreme, is already getting just insane. Oscar buzz, it's everywhere.

• 7:44Speaker 03

  I'm sorry to interrupt.

• 7:45Conan O'Brien?

  What?

• 7:46Speaker 03

  When I go home, I have to log these things into a spreadsheet, what each thing is about.

• 7:49Conan O'Brien?

  Sure.

• 7:50Speaker 03

  And we do, like, Eduardo and I will put in a small description, like, Sona talked about being hungry, but this one's gonna be Conan drinks own jizz.

• 7:57Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. Oh, post pineapple binge.

• 8:00Speaker 03

  Okay, continue.

• 8:01Conan O'Brien?

  But, you know, not for no reason.

• 8:03Speaker 03

  All right.

• 8:04Conan O'Brien?

  I'm thrilled he's here today!

• 8:12Speaker 02

  Josh Safdie, welcome.

• 8:18Conan O'Brien?

  I think you and I are friends now.

• 8:20Speaker 02

  I think so too.

• 8:20Conan O'Brien?

  I think we are.

• 8:21Speaker 02

  I do. You know why? Through Sandler. Anyone who you know through Sandler, you feel like you're a friend.

• 8:25Conan O'Brien?

  The best! You know, my favorite observation about Sandler, and this is in the last couple of years, is he always says the best. I'll bring up anyone. So let's say I see Sandler in half an hour at the store where they sell overly long gym shorts

• 8:41Conan O'Brien?

  for middle-aged men.

• 8:44Conan O'Brien?

  And I say to him, "Hey, I just..."

• 8:46Speaker 02

  Only middle-aged men.

• 8:47Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, only middle-aged men. It is such a long marquee.

• 8:50Speaker 02

  They card you when you go in.

• 8:52Conan O'Brien?

  But it's actually, I see Sandler, and I'll be like, "Oh, I know. What are you doing, buddy? What are you doing?" "Oh, I just saw Josh said, 'The best!' And then I can go, "Okay." And then 20 minutes later, I can say, "Oh, my God. By the way, I was just at a restaurant, and I had a Reuben sandwich." "The best!" And he keeps saying the best, down to the point where you're like, "Yeah, then I was in New York, and I actually I took the Lexington Avenue..." "Oh, the best! The best!"

• 9:22Speaker 02

  He once said to me... He said once to me, I was like, "I'm gonna go to the bathroom," and he goes, "The best."

• 9:26Conan O'Brien?

  The best.

• 9:28Speaker 02

  And I understood it, though. It was real. I was like, "Yeah, it is the best to go to the bathroom."

• 9:33Conan O'Brien?

  You have that pressure feeling in your bladder, and then you don't. Then you don't. It's the best.

• 9:38Speaker 02

  It is the best. My wife has to text me throughout the day saying, "Go to the bathroom." "I'll pee when I wake up, and then I go to sleep."

• 9:45Conan O'Brien?

  Is that right?

• 9:46Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's unfortunate. So that's why when I talked to Sandler, I said, "We're gonna go to the bathroom," and he was saying, "The best." Like, "I'm doing it."

• 9:53Conan O'Brien?

  But he says it all of the time.

• 9:54Speaker 02

  But he'll, there's variations, "The best."

• 9:56Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 9:57Speaker 02

  The best, the best.

• 9:57Conan O'Brien?

  The best, the best. But I love that he would even say it about like, "Yeah, you know, I think, well, apparently, the wife, the way she killed her husband is she used strychnine." "The best!" What? Instant, no trace, doesn't show up in the blood, the best. Wait, are we talking about toxins that kill you? The best. But, uh, okay.

• 10:25Speaker 02

  And he calls you Coney.

• 10:26Conan O'Brien?

  Coney, he calls me Coney, he's the only one that can. And, um, you know, we live-

• 10:30Speaker 02

  I accidentally said it to someone, they're like, what are you doing? It's like, well, I'm gonna go see Coney. Who the fuck are you talking about?

• 10:35Conan O'Brien?

  Tony, 2012.

• 10:36Speaker 02

  Coney. Is Coney like a seven-year-old boy?

• 10:41Conan O'Brien?

  Also, we live in the same neighborhood and I have been driving through my neighborhood and seen what looks like 1975 Stevie Nicks, walking down the street, covered in different-colored garments. And I look closer and it's Sandler where there's, and God bless him, he doesn't try to match any clothing. You know, it's just, it looks like a handkerchief store blew up near him and everything got glued to his body. And it's every single color you can imagine.

• 11:12Speaker 02

  Unbelievable, yeah.

• 11:13Conan O'Brien?

  And then I'll pull up and I'll be like, you know, hey, Adam, it's me. I'll lower the window, it's me, calling, oh, the best.

• 11:20Speaker 02

  He got pulled into a, when I was once, I was once with him and, uh, he got pulled into like a, some sort of high-end retail store. Because someone, you know, he's the nicest guy, so someone's like, oh man, I'm a fan. He's like, let's take a picture. And they invited him into the store, he's like, I'd love to show you my, my clothing. Adam Sandler in a high-end retail store, it does not make sense. So he said, I was like, what was going on in your head? He's like, I was counting the hangers. You know, like at some point, I have to just stop counting. I did 20. Very nice stuff you have in there.

• 11:49Conan O'Brien?

  You got good stuff, buddy, you got good stuff. I gotta go, I gotta go. Well, I also love, he will come by my house and he'll, unlike other people, like in LA, you call ahead, no one just drops in.

• 12:01Speaker 02

  He'll do a drop-in.

• 12:02Conan O'Brien?

  Sandler will be outside the gate going, Coney, Coney. And then you let him in and he's like, oh, buddy, buddy. And I'll say, hey, sit down. And then within maybe two minutes, he'll say, cause one time he brought his, uh, daughters with him. He was at, he was in my house for like five minutes, we watched part of a football game and he went, all right, I gotta go, I gotta go, buddy. He barely sat down and then he starts charging out and he's shouting up the stairs. Come on, girls, let's go, let's go. And he said, "We know when we're not wanted."

• 12:31Conan O'Brien?

  All I did was say, "Would you like a lemonade?" You know, "Let's get out of here."

• 12:36Speaker 02

  He moves, he moves fast.

• 12:37Conan O'Brien?

  He moves fast, but we are not here to eulogize Adam Sandler. He's alive and well and we love him.

• 12:43Speaker 02

  Yes, the best, the bust.

• 12:47Conan O'Brien?

  We are here, um, and I want to start with this and then we'll talk about other things and then we'll get back to it. But your movie, Marty Supreme, uh, is a juggernaut of delight. It is a just love that movie. I have watched a lot of Oscar movies because I gotta host that thing. I mean, movies that are gonna, are getting award, you know, getting up for awards.

• 13:13Speaker 02

  Thank God you're hosting, you're a great, you, you know what I was telling Mary, I was, you know, you, you could be the, you, if you were the host of a Denny's, I would go to that Denny's every day.

• 13:21Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, thank you.

• 13:22Speaker 02

  Every day.

• 13:23Conan O'Brien?

  That might be more appropriate. If this year goes well, it's on to Denny's.

• 13:29Conan O'Brien?

  I saw your movie with my friend Rodman Flender and I sat and the movie begins and it was a party. It was just like the crowd, it was one of those things that you dream about where the, the laughs are all there, the, the highs, the lows. And from the moment that movie begins, I, I was in all the way.

• 13:55Speaker 02

  Amazing.

• 13:55Conan O'Brien?

  And, uh, it was just an absolute pure delight. And so I'm so happy you're here because, uh, no spoilers, but I want to talk about this movie.

• 14:07Speaker 02

  Okay.

• 14:08Conan O'Brien?

  This movie is a major achievement and I hope, I mean, I know you're getting a lot of love, but I mean...

• 14:14Speaker 02

  Love from the people who you look up to and respect is different, uh, is just different.

• 14:18Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 14:19Speaker 02

  But it means a lot and also, you know, weirdly, weirdly, I was saying someone was asking me, cause Abel Ferrera, who's in the film, uh, who I've been a huge fan of and I knew him when he was not a sober person and I know you did too.

• 14:30Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 14:31Speaker 02

  And, uh... One of the best Conan interviews is the Abel Ferrara Conan interview because it is, it is like yoga, man. You are stretching, you are doing.

• 14:41Conan O'Brien?

  It was unhinged and I'll tell you, you know, sometimes there are movies about show business and in movies about show business like, you know, my favorite year, there's just improbable crazy things that happen. People get on stage seconds after they fix the broken set and the curtain comes up like a second before. Abel Ferrar was on the old late night show. He was this legendary director and persona. And not long before he was gonna come out, he was not the first guest, he might have been the second guest.

• 15:12Speaker 02

  Dennis Leary was the first one.

• 15:13Conan O'Brien?

  Okay, Dennis Leary is the first guest and Abel Ferrar is gonna come out and while I'm out during, doing the monologue, or maybe even talking to Dennis Leary as the first guest, Abel Ferrar, who's in his dressing room, runs away, gets to the elevator bank at late night on Rockford Center, hits the button, gets on the elevator and disappears. I'm, and he's the next guest up, you know, and I didn't know anything about this, but God bless him, Frank Smiley, who's been one of my, my segment producer forever, and did every single late night show and was a major, major force behind the show, he takes off, gets another elevator, goes down and then runs out onto the street and does that thing in movies where you look right, you look left.

• 15:58Conan O'Brien?

  And then he just gets a glimpse of Abel Ferrar in like a leather jacket and that saunter. And he takes off and Abel Ferrar goes into a bar and starts ordering a drink. And Frank goes in and has to drag Abel Ferrar back, convince him, cajole him, physically pull him, gets him back, they take the elevator up and he gets him back on his mark backstage as I'm saying, ladies and gentlemen, Abel Ferrar.

• 16:20Speaker 02

  That's unbelievable.

• 16:20Conan O'Brien?

  Then he runs out.

• 16:22Speaker 03

  You didn't know any of that?

• 16:22Conan O'Brien?

  I didn't know anything, because how could I?

• 16:24Speaker 02

  He's on the stage.

• 16:25Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, and I'm, um, and I'm just, you know, in full host mode and then. He's, he comes out and if you ever want to look up that interview.

• 16:34Speaker 02

  That's amazing.

• 16:34Conan O'Brien?

  Abel Ferrara, Conan O'Brien on the, on the late night show. And it is me talking to a wild animal.

• 16:43Conan O'Brien?

  And, and he is a, I think a big part of Marty Supreme, which we will, which we will talk about.

• 16:50Speaker 02

  My favorite part of the interview though, is how quickly Dennis Leary abandons any sort of allegancy as to you. And you would think the two of you kind of would be connected and bonded.

• 16:59Conan O'Brien?

  Two Boston Irish guys.

• 16:59Speaker 02

  Yeah, it's like, alright though, this is my, he goes right, maybe he wanted a part, I don't know what it was, but he went right to Abel's, Abel doesn't smoke cigarettes. He takes a cigarette, he's talking to Dennis, he's, he, you know, Abel Ferrara asked me once to do a Q and A with him and I've watched him do Q and As and his thing, particularly when he was not a sober person, was to throw the moderator under the bus instantly and just take it to the audience and then just make fun of the moderator. And he did that to you.

• 17:26Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 17:26Speaker 02

  He did that to you and I, but he's, he's, you know, I think you said something about like Stallone subtitles at some point and he was just like, whoa, what's that mean?

• 17:34Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 17:35Speaker 02

  He would ask me every take, he would say to me, uh, he would say, I'd tell him, you know, what the scene was and, you know, whatever, we had all these amazing conversations through WhatsApp because he lives in Rome. And he said, uh, he, he's, he was like, all right, you do it. I'm like, I'll do it. Yeah, he's like, you do the scene and I'll watch, and I'll know, I'll watch you how to, you do it and then I'll know how to do it.

• 17:54Conan O'Brien?

  Something no actor wants.

• 17:55Speaker 02

  No. And then he, and then he said, uh, so I did it, but I'm doing the scene as if I'm Abel Ferrara. So, and I'm like doing like the, I'm not talking, and he goes, you're doing me doing the scene. I was like, that's what's gonna happen.

• 18:09Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 18:09Speaker 02

  You know what I mean? That's eventually what's happening.

• 18:11Conan O'Brien?

  So, yeah, that's exactly what I'm gonna do.

• 18:13Speaker 02

  He's, his book is really good. He's sober, he's been sober 13 years and his book is good.

• 18:16Conan O'Brien?

  Well, good for him.

• 18:17Speaker 02

  Yeah, but when I worked with him, my first film, it was that situation, each take, he'd just walk away, wearing the lobby microphone, go to a bar.

• 18:23Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 18:23Speaker 02

  Pound a beer and then put the beers inside of his jacket.

• 18:26Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 18:26Speaker 02

  Do the scene with Ronnie, who's the lead of the movie, Mary's husband.

• 18:29Conan O'Brien?

  Yep.

• 18:29Speaker 02

  And who I wrote the movie with. And then Ronnie, Ronnie would do the scene with him, they never had one word outside of the actual scene where they was exchanging each other. And then for years Abel would introduce me to people as his director, because I don't think he remembered my name. I don't think you remember my name.

• 18:44Conan O'Brien?

  Right.

• 18:44Speaker 02

  Uh, I love him. He's this very special guy and that interview with you is like one of the great.

• 18:49Conan O'Brien?

  It's insane.

• 18:49Speaker 02

  Conan flailing interviews.

• 18:51Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, no, it's, and you know what Lorne Michaels said to me once? He said, Conan, people like to watch you work. Which is, and I realized he was right. People like to watch me squirm, contort myself, both my soul and my physical body in order to kind of make something work. And he said, they like to watch you work. And I said, well, I don't like, I like it when it's really easy.

• 19:15Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah.

• 19:22Conan O'Brien?

  You know, winning an award, that's a big achievement, right?

• 19:25Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 19:25Conan O'Brien?

  Every now and then in life, maybe something nice like that comes your way. Winning them consistently is almost impossible. It just doesn't happen, you know? Well, guess what? Winning five times in six years? You know what that sounds like to me? Sustained excellence.

• 19:40Speaker 01

  Nice.

• 19:40Conan O'Brien?

  Hyundai has done just that, earning the title of America's best SUV brand for 2026 from US News and World Report. You are a very happy Hyundai driver.

• 19:48Speaker 01

  I drive a Hyundai Palisade and I love my car. I love it. I love driving it around.

• 19:53Conan O'Brien?

  I've been tooling around in an Ioniq 5 N, which I love.

• 19:57Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 19:57Conan O'Brien?

  Beautiful car. Well, listen, whether you need an SUV for everyday life, your next big adventure, or extra room for family and friends, Hyundai has an option for you. The Tucson Hybrid is loaded with technology and built for everyday life. The Santa Fe Hybrid's fully capable and ready for adventure. The Palisade, that's yours, right?

• 20:12Speaker 01

  Hello.

• 20:13Conan O'Brien?

  They're gonna rename that the Sona. The Palisade Hybrid, yeah, delivers premium capability and class-leading interior space. With available, I have this memorized, H-Track all-wheel drive, up to an EPA estimated 619 miles of range on vehicles like the Palisade Hybrid and Hyundai's industry-leading warranty. It's easy to see why Hyundai continues to deliver the quality, innovation, technology, and value drivers expect from an award-winning brand. View US News Best Cars at cars.usnews.com and call 562-314-4603 for complete details.

• 20:48Conan O'Brien?

  So, you have to admit, the holidays, it's really about hanging with the people you love.

• 20:54Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 20:54Conan O'Brien?

  And getting to be yourself, not going to some stuffy holiday party where you need to conform to what the man wants you to think about the holidays.

• 21:03Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 21:03Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, it's about being yourself. Turn your holiday time into Miller time by enjoying a Miller Lite in a place where you're free to enjoy yourself on a walk with a cousin. With a cousin, why are they getting all specific about it?

• 21:14Speaker 01

  Because it's family.

• 21:15Conan O'Brien?

  But what about a niece or a nephew?

• 21:17Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 21:19Conan O'Brien?

  Like a walk with an ex-wife. I don't know, I mean, they're just throwing, that's a weird, they just made a very specific choice.

• 21:26Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 21:26Conan O'Brien?

  Now's the time for those unexpected holiday side guests and enjoy a great tasting light beer. 'Tis Miller time, as Dickens wrote. Miller Lite is brewed for taste, the taste you can depend on. The original light beer since 1975 and still iconic more than 50 years later. I like to be with my bros, my chums, my posse, crack open a Miller Lite, take a swig, a sip, look around and see my friends. We've known each other forever and we're just hanging out.

• 21:53Speaker 01

  Yeah, you guys are just doing chest bumps and high-fiving.

• 21:56Conan O'Brien?

  Miller Lite is great taste done right. Go to millerlite.com/conan to find delivery options near you, or you can pick up some Miller Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer. 'Tis Miller time. Celebrate responsibly Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin. 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.

• 22:12Speaker 04

  This is the story of the one. As a shipping manager, he's running the dock, stocking supplies, and making sure every order goes out on time. And Granger helps him stay prepared. From shipping supplies to PPE to hand tools, he counts on Granger to keep products moving and trucks rolling, so his operation runs smoothly no matter the shift. Call 1-800-GRANGER, click Granger.com, or just stop by. Granger, for the ones who get it done.

• 22:48Conan O'Brien?

  I'm gonna get us talking about Marty Supreme, which is getting all kinds of love.

• 22:52Speaker 02

  Turn this off quickly because I'm getting, I have a three-year-old and she's probably trying to FaceTime me. It's all good.

• 22:58Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, your priorities are correct.

• 23:00Speaker 02

  Let me turn this off right now.

• 23:02Conan O'Brien?

  Quiet to the three-year-old.

• 23:03Speaker 02

  Shut up, Minnie.

• 23:04Conan O'Brien?

  You're talking.

• 23:06Speaker 02

  Minnie, I'm talking to Conan O'Brien right now. You have no idea what this means to me.

• 23:11Conan O'Brien?

  I have so many questions about this movie. And then the first of all is, I don't think this movie could be made without Timothy. Timothy is this nuclear force at the center of the movie that needs to propel it. And I know that you usually are thinking about who this movie has to be for. I know that you and your brother, when you were thinking about Uncut Gems, it had to be Sandler. And it had to be Sandler to the degree that you wrote it for Sandler in 2011. He passes. He passes again in 2015.

• 23:48Speaker 02

  Sandy passed a bunch. That's what Sandy keeps saying.

• 23:50Conan O'Brien?

  Sandy Wernick. Sandy Wernick, his longtime, and I love you, Sandy. But Sandy Wernick just kept getting this goofy script and I think not even showing it to Adam.

• 24:02Speaker 02

  Definitely not.

• 24:03Conan O'Brien?

  But then finally, you guys kept at it. You didn't cast anybody else. In 2017, you get Adam to say yes. And I think it has been such a wonderful thing for Adam. Because after that movie, those of us who know Adam saw that he was a real dramatic actor long before Uncut Gems. But you guys put him dead center in the crosshairs and gave him this acting challenge. And he killed it. And that is you guys, that's Adam. But I know that That whole process of doing Uncut Gems took you 10 years?

• 24:45Speaker 02

  10 years, yeah, 10 years.

• 24:46Conan O'Brien?

  Unbelievable.

• 24:47Speaker 02

  This one was six.

• 24:48Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 24:48Speaker 02

  My wife's like, "You gotta figure it out."

• 24:52Speaker 02

  Can't do it that way.

• 24:53Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 24:54Speaker 02

  But I...

• 24:55Conan O'Brien?

  So...

• 24:56Speaker 02

  But Sandler, you know what's interesting is like, okay, so I did the, then I did the special with Sandler Love You. Uh, and he makes you cry. Sandler can make you cry. He, I was just telling him in the clip that I saw from J. Kelly, he's such a big golden retriever, or not a mastiff, he's more like a mastiff. Big mastiff who's like, you know, I don't even like, I don't even want to say out loud some of the things I feel about him. Cause I'm very, for me, he's, I'm very emotional about him. And, uh, I think most people who are close with him do get that way because he is very open. He's like a very mushy, mushy person. I love that word mushy. He's very mushy, mushy, mushy gushy, uh, and mushy tushy. So that, so I say to my daughter, I've turned into a three-year-old.

• 25:39Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 25:40Speaker 02

  I say it all the time, I'm like mushy tushy, uh, everything is tushy with my daughter.

• 25:43Conan O'Brien?

  She's calling again. She's like, "You got it right, that's it."

• 25:46Speaker 02

  I'll like literally just turn to my daughter, Minnie, every once in a while, I'm like, "Minnie, how, guess what?" She goes, "Tushy." And I was like, "Tushy." Anyway, Sandler's...

• 25:53Conan O'Brien?

  Why do we have to evolve?

• 25:54Speaker 02

  Yeah, we don't.

• 25:55Conan O'Brien?

  We don't.

• 25:55Speaker 02

  I didn't. You gotta be forever young. I had, uh, Jack Fisk is my production designer, one of the greatest of all time. He's just turned 80, or 79 or something. And he worked with the best, and he grew up with David Lynch, and he's did some amazing movies, There Will Be Blood and Mulholland Drive and Badlands. He met his wife, Sissy Spacek, on, and he is probably the youngest person I've ever really gotten to know. Like, he's like an eight-year-old, and like, we're texting at 3, 4 in the morning, and I just felt so, I felt young with him.

• 26:23Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 26:23Speaker 02

  So, so you just stay tushy, you just gotta say tushy all the time.

• 26:26Conan O'Brien?

  Tushy, mushy tushy.

• 26:27Speaker 02

  Mushy tushy. But Sandler, when I was making Gems, and, you know, spoiler alert to anyone who hasn't seen it, he dies at the end of the movie. And the entire film for me was watching somebody who's so alive all the time, and knowing that he dies, I would well up and cry throughout the movie. And he was like, "What's going on with you?" And I was like, "I know, I have, I have issues." Uh, but I, but I really would, um...

• 26:49Conan O'Brien?

  It's so funny that you had the power to keep him alive. Yeah.

• 26:54Speaker 02

  I could have. No, he had to die.

• 26:56Conan O'Brien?

  He gets winged in the shoulder.

• 26:57Speaker 03

  Not only that, but you essentially killed him.

• 26:58Speaker 02

  Yeah, yeah, I know. It's weird. And then.

• 27:00Conan O'Brien?

  This is, I'm all broken up. Why? I'm gonna murder you soon. Oh, it just breaks my heart.

• 27:06Speaker 02

  But he is, but he is, but he is also the best, yeah. He's, he's also so like, to me, that he is that like, a live, electric character who is like constantly looking to just disappear at any moment. Just connect with somebody. And he's, he has, he's anxious. He's a very anxious person in his early stand-up, where he's talking, pretending to be things in the refrigerator. You know what I mean? He's a, his humor is very unique. I grew up loving those albums so much.

• 27:34Conan O'Brien?

  Of course.

• 27:34Speaker 02

  So much, uh, to the point when I'm meeting people who appear on the albums, I'm like starstruck. And, uh, so, so I, you know, felt like I knew him on some level. So when I wrote it for him, I also knew that he had, he has this rage in him, which he does. That's real. That's not, you know, I mean, it's obviously those who know him, he can get, he can have an outburst. But they're loving and immediately he can go back to being mushy tushy. But he's still like, he's still Sandler and, and, uh, he's the Sandman. People, how many people do you know in your life? You can just call them that. Like their nickname.

• 28:06Conan O'Brien?

  I knew like six.

• 28:07Speaker 02

  Six, yeah.

• 28:09Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. I worked, I worked at a sand company for a while.

• 28:14Conan O'Brien?

  I did. They, just they manufacture high-grain sand.

• 28:17Speaker 02

  And you knew no one's name, so you just called everyone Sandman?

• 28:19Conan O'Brien?

  That's what you do. And half of them's name when I found out was Sandman. So, you know, but you know, it's interesting to me.

• 28:24Speaker 02

  The last name was Sandman.

• 28:25Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, the last name.

• 28:26Speaker 02

  Jews.

• 28:26Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 28:28Conan O'Brien?

  I'm Oisice Sandman.

• 28:29Speaker 02

  Yeah, I'm Superman.

• 28:34Speaker 02

  Speederman.

• 28:35Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 28:38Speaker 02

  That's what I always say. I would say Marty is like, he, he's like Speederman. He's Marty Speederman.

• 28:43Conan O'Brien?

  Yes.

• 28:43Speaker 02

  You know?

• 28:44Conan O'Brien?

  Well, he is. I mean, here's the thing.

• 28:45Speaker 02

  But I did write it for Timmy. I did. I wrote it for him. I met him before I really knew him as an actor.

• 28:50Conan O'Brien?

  Right.

• 28:50Speaker 02

  And this kid that I met, you know, I would go, I was at the premiere for one of our movies. Agent comes up to me, agent's at a party and they're like, oh, I want to introduce you to the next superstar. It's pretty obnoxious. You hear that all the time. Everyone's the next superstar. So I'm skeptical and I go and I meet this kid and he's in the corner of the room and he's with his buddy. And he was there, but he wasn't like there. He wasn't where he wanted to be and he had, he was like, he couldn't stand still. He was like coming out of his own skin and he had these really big dreaming eyes. And then I, then I went to go see a movie. I called me by her name like four months later. And he, that movie could have been like kind of a small film, you know, and he just through his acting, through his performance, expanded the walls of this movie, made it a huge movie.

• 29:30Speaker 02

  And, and I watched him on stage afterwards. He just turns in this like super serious star forming performance. And then he's doing, being interviewed at the New York Film Festival, 1,200 people. And he's rocking back on his chair, which I do all the time uncontrollably and he fell. He fell down on his ass. Onto his back. Could have been very embarrassing, but every single person in that room laughed and we laughed like we were his guest. And that was so like, cause we felt so intimate to him. So I wrote it for, I, when I said to him, I was like, I want that person to be this part.

• 30:00Conan O'Brien?

  Well, so what's interesting to me about this movie, just watching it and there's a bunch of things that struck me. But one reminded me a little bit of Frank Capra. Frank Capra used to make the most of small, small characters. So yeah, okay, you're, you're watching Jimmy Stewart or whatever, but then he goes in just to buy a newspaper. And the guy who sells in the newspaper is memorable. Maybe has one line, but is memorable. That is usually not done anymore. And Marty Supreme, I watched it and I turned to my friend Rodman afterwards and I went, those faces. All the faces of everybody, people that are in that dreary hotel where Abel Ferrara lives.

• 30:46Conan O'Brien?

  Anytime there's a face in the crowd who, and, and the camera's on them for a second. Their face is fascinating. These faces loom out at you and they're absolutely incredible. And I was thinking about all the supporting players.

• 31:00Speaker 02

  David, we cast every single.

• 31:02Conan O'Brien?

  David Mamet, Sandra Bernhardt. Isaac Mizrahi, Abel Ferrara, Tyler, the creator, Kevin O'Leary from Shark Tank. And, and you know, you have, yeah, okay, Gwyneth Paltrow. Yeah, but that's not a shock that Gwyneth Paltrow is in a great movie, but.

• 31:18Speaker 02

  She hadn't acted in a while.

• 31:19Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, but, but to see Kevin O'Leary and say, yeah, the guy from Shark Tank, he should have a major part in this. And then have it work perfectly.

• 31:28Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 31:29Conan O'Brien?

  I love the fearlessness with which you guys say, wait a minute, that's the face. That's the person. And I think you're seeing something in them. That you think is, as you said, it's all a documentary.

• 31:42Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 31:43Conan O'Brien?

  This is, this Marty Supreme movie is based on a guy.

• 31:47Speaker 02

  Loosely.

• 31:47Conan O'Brien?

  Very loosely, very, very loosely.

• 31:50Speaker 02

  Inspired by.

• 31:50Conan O'Brien?

  Inspired by, but it's a completely fictitious tale. And then what you guys do, what you've done is you've extracted the essence of these people. Somehow.

• 32:02Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 32:03Conan O'Brien?

  And they're, they're perfect in those moments.

• 32:05Speaker 02

  Yeah, I always, when I meet somebody, I'm just, I want to see the best in them, you know, and I, and, um, and I'm, I admire people who are centered, like people who are kind of there invisible to themselves. Because I, I'm not, uh, but I, but I do, I, I admire people who are iconic, they're iconically them. There's a guy in the movie who plays Abel's like side, his friend.

• 32:29Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 32:30Speaker 02

  Who, uh, who's also in Uncut Gems and his name is Mitchell Wenig. And he, uh, met him at a diner in 2007 or something. And I always wanted to put him in something and Benny and I put him in a short and then we put him in Gems. And I stay in touch with him. He shows up in the Sandler special and he's a, his job, he worked for HUD, the Housing Department in New York City. And then he, I've, his hobby is he's an autograph collector. This guy is in the movie. And I saw him hovering and waiting outside Gwyneth's trailer.

• 33:00Speaker 02

  With a folder and glossy images of her from Emma. And I said, Mitchell, what are you doing? He goes, you think it's inappropriate? I said, you're a co-star. You want me to get the autograph? He's like, no, I really want to be the one to get it because there's a specific place where she has to sign. But what I love about him, he doesn't sell. So he's different from the guys who are selling stuff nonstop and making sure it's here and that. And he was good friends with Johnny. Anyway, he is, I love being around him. I genuinely like, you know, his point of view on life. I find it so refreshing, everything he has to say.

• 33:41Speaker 02

  And I am, you know, moved by people who are iconically themselves. So how do I get it? How do I do it? What is I, I mean, I just, I don't know. I just see somebody and I see them for their essence. And I believe that if you know someone really well, these interviews help. And getting to know them and making them feel comfortable. That's like so much of directing is just making people feel, I mean, that's you had to do, still have to do it. And then they can get into a space where they can be, without starting to sound like evil, manipulated. But they can be. But that is your job. Yeah, they can be led into situations. Right. And then having someone like Timmy, I can actually work with him through him sometimes.

• 34:26Speaker 02

  And I don't put marks down on the floor or anything. And Darius, my cinematographer is like, master lighter spends three hours. He's like, no, they have to stand right here. I was like, not if they don't want to, Darius. And I was like, no, trust me. He's like, they have to. I won't be lit if they're over here. I was like, then they're not lit. Then they're not lit over there and they're standing there, but I'll get them there. And more or less, the blocking that I have, I generally know how this person's going to move. And they will most likely land in that pool of light. But if they don't, it actually helps add, I think, a little bit of realism to the movie because things aren't so perfect. Did you recognize the guy in the cage who's with George Gervin, who's the great Iceman from the Spurs? There's a guy who works in the cage, he's kind of like the, I guess, the greeter. He's the voice of the ping pong parlor.

• 35:09Speaker 02

  He was, there was a viral video in 2007 of this man on the side of the highway. He was homeless and he had a sign. And the guy said, all right, I'll give you a dollar if you use that magical voice that you claim to have. And he goes, this is welcome to. Yes, I remember that, famous. So it was like an early viral sensation. Yeah, yeah. Then he became the man with the golden voice. And then he fell in some hard times and. Good morning, America. Calling the man with the so-called golden voice? He still had the golden voice, but I don't know why all of a sudden it was so-called.

• 35:36Conan O'Brien?

  Right.

• 35:36Speaker 02

  And I loved him. I found him to be so special and warm and, you know, um, and the voice too. When you cast somebody, you're also casting a voice.

• 35:47Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 35:47Speaker 02

  Which is interesting. Like I put Mary Ann from Brooklyn from The Stern Show. She's the first person you see in the movie.

• 35:53Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 35:53Speaker 02

  And her voice, what's great about Mary Ann from Brooklyn is she's so beautiful, but you hear this voice along. And they put the crow sound all the time. Fred's like, wah, wah, every time she speaks.

• 36:02Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 36:02Speaker 02

  But her voice, I find the voice to be beautiful. And then you see her and she's beautiful. And then you cast her and she's the first face that you see, but you hear her first. Anyway, so I'm casting all of it.

• 36:11Conan O'Brien?

  But here's the scenario, here's, but what I'm saying is here's.

• 36:13Speaker 02

  Sorry, I could talk forever.

• 36:14Conan O'Brien?

  No, no, but what I'm saying is the scenario that fascinates me is in this world now, post Marty Supreme and Gems, you know, you're gonna have so many big actors, they're gonna be approaching you and saying, oh, you know, come on, Josh, I'd be great for this. I'd be really good for this. And, you know, it's, it's Matt Damon and it's Ben Affleck and they're big, yeah, yeah, and I'd be great for it too. And then you have to tell them, guys, it's not you. Well, who's it? Who do we lose it to? You know, did we, who do we lose it to? You lost it to the guy who came to fix the toilet forty minutes ago. He had the snake and he was routing around, but he had the light hit him and I just knew he had that purity of,

• 36:57Conan O'Brien?

  I need to get this toilet unclogged and I don't care how much shit I need to handle with my bare hands.

• 37:02Speaker 03

  And by the way, that guy's playing Jason Bourne too.

• 37:04Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, exactly. Also, I'm, I'm the, yeah, the safty version of Jason Bourne. But I mean, that is something that I.

• 37:11Speaker 02

  I happened with Dave Krumholtz, actually, because he was going for the part that Mitchell ended up getting.

• 37:15Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 37:15Speaker 02

  And his audition was amazing. He was great. He's a great actor. I've always loved him since Sums of Beverly Hills. Even before then, and he's just a fantastic actor. But then he's like, you know, I saw the movie and I realized, oh, I lost it to that guy. You know what I mean?

• 37:29Conan O'Brien?

  Right, right. He paints lines in a parking lot.

• 37:33Speaker 02

  He's, he's, he's, you know, he's, I, they wanted like this real, this real person, this guy's essence.

• 37:39Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 37:40Speaker 02

  As much as that he could emulate it, he's not that person. And, and I think adding a lot of people who you also don't know, but you feel like you know them immediately, has this kind of additive effect that you're just in real life. And, and every, every single person in the cast, the guy who works in the shoe store, this guy Lloyd, he's,

• 37:56Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 37:57Speaker 02

  Horse better, he's a great horse better at Oco Dog Race Track. And Ratso, who's a friend of mine, who do you, did he, you never crossed paths with him, right? He was not the lampoon at all.

• 38:07Conan O'Brien?

  I don't think so, no.

• 38:08Speaker 02

  Ratso, Larry Slowman, he, he was a great writer, he wrote Stern's book, Private Parts.

• 38:12Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, okay, I don't think I know him. But I could, I might be best friends with him.

• 38:15Speaker 02

  I know, I know him.

• 38:16Conan O'Brien?

  I'm a very empty man.

• 38:18Speaker 02

  I know.

• 38:19Conan O'Brien?

  And who are you, by the way? And where are we right now?

• 38:22Speaker 02

  He's the guy who plays the uncle.

• 38:23Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, yeah, okay, yes.

• 38:24Speaker 02

  So he's, anyway, so the backstory that I had for him is that he got the shop through his kind of, his horse racing obsession.

• 38:33Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 38:33Speaker 02

  And then I tell that to Jen, and then Jen's like, oh, we'll look at horse betters. So then all of a sudden, you're getting Lloyd.

• 38:38Conan O'Brien?

  This is, I mean, this is a, this casting technique, it, it might change things because it's so effective and powerful in this whole idea of, well, we gotta cast someone as the nerd who operates the elevator. Get me all the nerds and everyone who has got an eight by 10 where they're wearing glasses, that's taped in the middle and they're like, woo! That they just line up.

• 39:03Speaker 02

  By the way, I just learned what the, what the word geek is. You know what a geek is?

• 39:06Conan O'Brien?

  Well, I know what I think a geek is.

• 39:08Speaker 02

  No, but like, I just, I was talking to Ronnie and he casually mentioned, like, he was talking, he's reading a book about the circus in the sixties.

• 39:15Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, yeah, yeah.

• 39:16Speaker 02

  A geek is the person who like bites the heads off of chickens and stuff.

• 39:19Conan O'Brien?

  That kind of geek, yeah, yeah.

• 39:20Speaker 02

  And that must be.

• 39:21Conan O'Brien?

  Circus geek.

• 39:21Speaker 02

  Yeah, circus geek. There must be some correlation between a geek.

• 39:24Conan O'Brien?

  But then it somehow became nerdy and it's like, no, it's not, it's original, it's original derivation is not nerd.

• 39:30Speaker 02

  It's not nerd. Nerds are smart. Geeks are not smart.

• 39:33Conan O'Brien?

  Totally outside society and they're.

• 39:36Speaker 03

  What's a dweeb then?

• 39:37Conan O'Brien?

  Well, dweeb is very different.

• 39:39Speaker 02

  Yeah, what is a dweeb?

• 39:40Conan O'Brien?

  Well, I'll tell you because I have long experience.

• 39:43Speaker 03

  That's why I'm asking.

• 39:44Conan O'Brien?

  I don't know. I have no idea. I like to pretend I know instantly.

• 39:47Speaker 01

  I like dork.

• 39:48Speaker 02

  There was a great in Living Color sketch. It was like a geek, a dweeb or a spaz. And you had to pick.

• 39:52Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 39:53Speaker 02

  And I remember that as a kid. I loved it. Anyway, sorry, going back to, why did I say geek? Oh, you're talking about the tape.

• 39:59Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, and, and, but let's, let's get back to, let's get back to the center of the movie. Timothy.

• 40:06Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 40:06Conan O'Brien?

  Uh, is, um, he's spectacular and also, this is something he did last year in the, uh, Bob Dylan. Is that he went off and learned.

• 40:20Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 40:20Conan O'Brien?

  How to play guitar in a very specific way that mimicked how Dylan was playing guitar in those, in those early, uh, village years. And got it down just right, which is no easy thing to do.

• 40:36Speaker 02

  No.

• 40:37Conan O'Brien?

  Then.

• 40:37Speaker 02

  Not at all.

• 40:38Conan O'Brien?

  Then for, then for, um, Marty Supreme.

• 40:42Speaker 02

  I mean, if there's any voice you want to emulate, Dylan's probably the easiest.

• 40:45Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Maria Callas, not so much. I lost that part. I don't know why. Um, but when you get to Timothy playing table tennis, he's so convincing and I found out later on that, yeah, you can do things, I guess, with CGI or whatever, but he really spent a long time getting great at this. And I started to realize he's built like a table tennis guy.

• 41:13Speaker 02

  Oh, yeah, absolutely.

• 41:14Conan O'Brien?

  He's so wiry and kinetic and he's got so much energy that it's the perfect sport for him to play. I don't know if that went into.

• 41:24Speaker 02

  I think he would like to imagine that he could be an NBA basketball player, but sure, table tennis.

• 41:29Conan O'Brien?

  No, I, don't tell him I said that. Yeah, tell him I said, you know, oh, yeah, Lakers.

• 41:35Speaker 02

  The first, one of the first, you know, the, the inspirations for the movie was this character that my wife, who's a producer on the movie, got this book that was. A autobiography memoir about this wiry kind of, there was a bunch of these intense outsiders who hung out at this table tennis parlor midtown New York.

• 41:54Speaker 02

  A footnote of history was interesting. It was owned by the first black business owner in the Times Square district. That's who, his name is Herwold Lawrence, and that's who George Grivin plays. But at this place, which my great uncle played at, he said there was like an orphanage for outcasts. And they were all these wiry, kind of proto ADD, super smart people who got terrible grades because they just did not care for school. Astrophysicists and criminals, Motley Crue. And I saw, I was like, I immediately, when I was reading, I was like, I want to know what these guys looked like. And I typed in like 1949 British Open. And I immediately see these guys, these young guys, wire, wiry, bouncing all over the place. And I immediately called Timmy and I was like, this is the project we can do together. Yeah.

• 42:37Speaker 02

  And I said it weirdly, I, I don't know why I was like so fearful of the idea of period. So I put it to Peter Gabriel. And I have the touch, that that feeling, the time I like is the rush hour because I like to touch, the rush. And, and that was, that was the beginning of it. And I just thought, I was like, if there's any sport, this would be perfect for, for Timmy. And he, and he, and he spent like seven years, I remember he played me early on. Six years, six years. Yeah. Cause he was doing it in tandem with Dylan. And I remember he played me and my wife, we went to see him, he played, he was just starting to learn guitar. He didn't know how to play guitar when he'd started doing Dylan at all. And he's like, oh, I want to play you a Dylan song. And I wish I could remember the song. I remember him playing it and me looking at my, my wife and I was like, it's gonna be a rough one.

• 43:19Speaker 02

  You know, it was like, he was like, well, that was good, right? I was like, you're amazing, man. That was, that was something. And I meant it. That's the answer to that question. Yeah. That was something. But, but.

• 43:29Conan O'Brien?

  That's what people said to Dylan originally too.

• 43:30Speaker 02

  But then he, but then I watched him like over the years in tandem with table tennis and he started training with this guy. Uh, who was like the youngest of US champion, this guy Michael Landers, who was on a Wheaties box at one point. Uh, maybe it was not Wheaties, but it was another cereal brand. Anyway, he, I watched him train and he got the mechanics good. And then when, by the time he, I linked him with these, this. Husband-wife team Diego Scoff and his wife Wei Wang. Uh, who she was an Olympian who he did, cause I read that he did Forrest Gump. And I was like, I mean, whoever did Forrest Gump, I loved as a kid. I loved that section. Which is inspired by an amazing true story in the seventies. That broke down the communication between China and the US.

• 44:13Conan O'Brien?

  Right. Help thaw relations.

• 44:15Speaker 02

  Yeah, it was through table tennis. It was like hippie guy missed his bus in Tokyo in the seventies. And or the sixties and got onto the Chinese bus. And they were all, they hadn't seen an American person. So now there's this like long haired guy and he's like, hey, peace and love everybody.

• 44:31Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 44:31Speaker 02

  And the number one player in the world goes up to him, gives him a gift. The guy gives him a gift back and that made news. And then Mao invited the team to China and then that broke and then Nixon was like, all right. And then it became known as ping pong diplomacy. Nixon visited shortly after. And I didn't know that story until I was doing research for this. But you watch Forrest Gump and you assume all of that sequence when, you know, when he there's he's like showing up like Zelig and all the world is. But, but anyway, so uh, how did I get on that? Oh, um, ping pong with Diego, who did Forrest Gump. When they met with him, you know, Diego is has this incredible.

• 45:09Conan O'Brien?

  So Diego is is helping to instruct Timothy.

• 45:11Speaker 02

  He's gonna, well Wei is gonna, his wife is gonna teach him how to play better because the mechanics had to be perfect.

• 45:17Conan O'Brien?

  Right.

• 45:17Speaker 02

  And Diego's gonna be the choreographer consultant. And he has this incredible recorded like library of footage of going back to the eighties. Of these amazing games. So we combed through all of those and built each point, the narratives of each point.

• 45:31Conan O'Brien?

  It's unbelievable.

• 45:31Speaker 02

  And we, yeah, it was really, yeah, so the games, I imagine, I hope the games are really engaging and entertaining.

• 45:37Conan O'Brien?

  The games are thrilling.

• 45:38Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 45:38Conan O'Brien?

  They are, they're thrilling to watch. And you know, again, what adds to it is that Marty's desperately wanting to be the best and show everybody.

• 45:51Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 45:51Conan O'Brien?

  Actually probably knows I am the best and I need to show everybody I'm the best and I will do anything.

• 45:57Speaker 02

  I love the Guinness Book of World Records. I've always loved it.

• 46:00Conan O'Brien?

  I was fascinated with that when I was a kid.

• 46:01Speaker 02

  Cause it's amazing. Cause you'd be like, wow, some of this guy. Is the best at this thing. He can hold his breath for three and a half minutes while like balancing a ball on his head.

• 46:09Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 46:09Speaker 02

  You know, there is something really beautiful about the the desire to have a place in the sun, basically. It's a car like and everybody and then dreams in particular are fascinating to me because they're. And I told the story kind of like a heist film, you know, it's it's but it's like dreams as heists. You're like trying to control your own fate. And I think that kind of adds to a little bit level of suspense. It's like you're watching somebody, you know, his dream is totally ridiculous to ninety nine point nine percent of the people he meets. And every moment that people do not buy into his dream or and every moment he fails is approbation to them. So it's like the whole every time he gets set back in the movie, I think what I like to hear is people really feel that.

• 46:52Speaker 02

  And it adds a level of tension to it, but it's about a guy who really just wants to be the greatest table tennis player, which doesn't really get him.

• 46:59Conan O'Brien?

  There's been, there's a lot of things about Marty that's unlikable. You know, very brash, very rude, um, cutting corners left and right, throwing people under the bus if he has to. And yet, there's not a person watching that movie who isn't rooting for him. And I find that to be really fascinating and that that's the sleight of hand that I think is really magical about, you know.

• 47:23Speaker 02

  Well, you have to give somebody, I think, love is more important than likability. And I I believe that those moments that you are connecting with him are are kind of pure.

• 47:34Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 47:35Speaker 02

  And they are, because they're pure, they have a feeling of love attached to them like. Liking is more of a casual thing, uh, and look, you know, I I and I think that he's at chasing happiness. Desperately chasing happiness and happiness is a very fleeting kind of haunted feeling. Happiness is very is kind of sad in a way because it's so hard to to achieve.

• 47:57Conan O'Brien?

  It's trying to grab smoke.

• 47:58Speaker 02

  Exactly, exactly. And I think that there is something sympathetic to it, but I think his youth. I think when you're young, the concept of consequences, so it's it's so small. Because the world is so big and because it's so big, there's so many different options. Well, that didn't work. I can go over here. And I think that that youth is also kind of a little bit of, the movie's kind of about being an idiot in your twenties. You know what I mean?

• 48:21Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, my God, and also confidence.

• 48:22Speaker 02

  Yes, oh, my God, yeah.

• 48:24Conan O'Brien?

  This guy.

• 48:25Speaker 02

  You need confidence.

• 48:25Conan O'Brien?

  This guy who talks his way into all these situations and then he's in a big room. And he's in London, I think.

• 48:33Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 48:33Conan O'Brien?

  And.

• 48:34Speaker 02

  Which one in the dining hall with Kevin O'Leary when he comes up or?

• 48:37Conan O'Brien?

  Well, it's with, he sees Gwyneth.

• 48:40Speaker 02

  Yeah.

• 48:40Conan O'Brien?

  Paltrow's character come in. So this extraordinarily beautiful woman comes in and he sees her and he's like, yep, gonna call her up. And, and then he.

• 48:51Speaker 02

  Well, his star, her stardom is like, it's so interesting to him. He's just like, wow, she burns bright. And he, and, and distraught, he's upset, the beginning, he's upset with the, it's the press conference that he's manipulated. He's upset that they're not paying attention to him in this moment. Cause he has everything totally figured out. He knows how he's gonna get, he's gonna say the things that are gonna get a rise out of these people, so they're gonna wanna write a piece about him. And he's gonna be proud of his little, I used to walk around with a little Village Voice clipping when I would do my research and I'd pull it out to show somebody like, I'm a serious filmmaker. Check it out, look at my little Village Voice clipping. And in hindsight, I was so proud of those little clippings in hindsight, it's probably kinda pathetic. You know what I mean? I'm like showing this tiny little clipping and I'm like, trust me, give me some money to make this movie.

• 49:35Speaker 02

  Look at me, I was in the Village Voice and like.

• 49:37Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, the minute someone pulls a clipping out of their wallet, you've lost the argument.

• 49:43Speaker 02

  But he, but it's, but it's, but it's endearing when he, when Marty does it in the movie with Gwyneth. And I think that like.

• 49:49Conan O'Brien?

  That's the magic.

• 49:49Speaker 02

  With time, I've been able to kind of, you know, it was tragic, but it's comedic. You know, what is the comedy's tragedy plus time? Like that feels it that, I think that's what makes that funny is that it's so tragic that he is that way, but he's so confident that it kind of down, downplays. And I think his confidence is, is interesting to people. I think it makes people are motivated to kinda wanna root for him. Plus, there's a little bit of a trick happening where you, it's the sporting elements, you're forced to root for him.

• 50:17Conan O'Brien?

  Yes.

• 50:18Speaker 02

  You know, like any, I don't know any, I don't understand anyone who watches sports casually. Like you have to have a narrative, you have to have a team that you root for, there's stories inside of that so that you can invest yourself in the game. Just to like, that's why I think people love gambling so much, cause it's like, oh, I get to watch the sport and have something that I really want out of it.

• 50:35Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 50:36Speaker 02

  And I think that, that, that does help a little bit in the movie. I think you feel like you really have to root for him.

• 50:43Conan O'Brien?

  Now, let's go to 10,000 feet, Google Earth out of this whole thing. This movie now, it's award season.

• 50:48Speaker 02

  I was really there just now.

• 50:50Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. No, I'm gonna go even higher and talk about, actually talk about plate tectonics.

• 50:57Conan O'Brien?

  But no, we, movie, award season, are you chill during these situations where you're gonna go to, depending on when this airs, but it's still gonna be award season, I think, when this comes out? And are you able to go and be somewhat detached? Or are you, is every fiber of your being hope that you come home with a big award?

• 51:18Speaker 02

  Oh my god, no. I, you know, part of the inspiration for this movie was the feeling that I had after finishing Uncut Gems. You have this like 10-year journey where you're filtering your entire life through these characters. You're trying to understand your life through fiction. And you're writing, you're creating these characters, and maybe you can change the way you feel. And like, oh, that's why I did this, said this to my girlfriend, or whatever, did this to my buddy. And I woke up every morning, I had this, and I was like, I gotta get Adam Sandler, gotta get him. And then finally, you're making the movie with a decent budget and with Adam Sandler. And then it's done, and then I finished the movie and I'm showing it. And the pandemic's like around the corner, unknowingly. And someone said, what's next? And I started to cry, because I was like, I didn't know, I had this hollow feeling.

• 52:04Speaker 02

  Because this thing that was like my drive every single day was gone.

• 52:08Conan O'Brien?

  Didn't you contemplate maybe being an architect?

• 52:11Speaker 02

  I did, how do you know that?

• 52:12Conan O'Brien?

  I, I ask around. I walk around alleys with Abel Ferrara, give people $20, what's the word? What's the word on Josh?

• 52:20Speaker 02

  Well, I said to Ronnie, I said to Ronnie, I said, yeah, I don't even know if I want to do this anymore.

• 52:24Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 52:25Speaker 02

  And he was like, whoa, you're my writing partner, buddy. What do you mean? And I was like, I do, I would love to one day build a building, that's like my big dream. I like the feeling of a narrative of a building, of going in and experiencing and having something happen inside. Going out the back and coming through, and then like forever, that area, you have like a relationship with it.

• 52:43Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 52:44Speaker 02

  But, so I've had that hollow feeling when I shouldn't have had a hollow feeling. I should have felt incredible, should have felt like I did this thing, I should have felt a sense of accomplishment, but I didn't. And that feeling is you see that at the end of Marty a little bit. You know that he finally does this thing, but it's for who for himself for what?

• 53:01Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 53:01Speaker 02

  And dreams are really lonely. So that I have that now. I can't, I'm not gonna lie.

• 53:06Conan O'Brien?

  Right. So you're done with this and it's yeah.

• 53:08Speaker 02

  And I'm yeah. Next is the is the I'm gonna contact Burger King about designing their new. Cause I think that there needs to be more aesthetics in fast food. I don't like the direction of the the fast food has gone in.

• 53:19Conan O'Brien?

  You know what's gonna happen? You're gonna go into the Burger King because you want to design a better Burger King. And you're gonna see someone working the fryer and go, that face. You're the next Myrna Loy. Myrna Loy. Fuck is Myrna Loy?

• 53:32Speaker 02

  But I do, but I do feel like so right now, like I'm just having a slightly like disassociative feeling.

• 53:37Conan O'Brien?

  Sure.

• 53:37Speaker 02

  Kind of like you made this really personal thing. It's connecting with people and audiences.

• 53:41Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 53:41Speaker 02

  And.

• 53:42Conan O'Brien?

  Deservedly so.

• 53:43Speaker 02

  I went, I was once in a, at a film festival and they, uh, in Poland. And these were like a lot of very small art films. And I was there at a movie, tiny movie that me and my brother made. And there's other movies that we like, and they sat us all in one room. He said, one of you will be leaving with 200,000 euro. And it's look to your right and look to your left and it might be them and it might not be you. And all of a sudden, everyone's looking at each other like, oh, you get competitive.

• 54:10Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 54:10Speaker 02

  And like, holy shit. And it was horrible. I didn't like that. I thought I was coming to this festival to share this thing, get to see Poland. Then that volcano happened. Remember the volcano eruption that no one could say? Uh, the name of that volcano. And then all of a sudden, all the US judges who were supposed to come in and be a part of the government. We're grounded in America. So I'm like, oh, shoot, our best, you know, Benny and I are figuring out how, why now we're not gonna win because we had these US judges. So then we partnered with another filmmaker. We're like, all right, if you win, which we thought they had another great movie. If you win, let's share the money. And he was like, that's a deal done. And then, you know, you get there and you're just looking at everybody and the competition thing is kind of weird. That said, it's nice to win.

• 54:51Conan O'Brien?

  So who won?

• 54:52Speaker 02

  Oh, not some of the Polish film because they only could use Polish people and the jury.

• 54:58Conan O'Brien?

  I see.

• 54:58Speaker 02

  You thought this was going to a place like, and we won.

• 55:01Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, let's, hey, do me a favor, Josh.

• 55:03Speaker 02

  Sorry.

• 55:04Conan O'Brien?

  Let's do a rewrite.

• 55:06Speaker 02

  No, no, no.

• 55:07Conan O'Brien?

  You won!

• 55:08Speaker 02

  But you wanted, what was interesting is that they, they said, we really wanted to go and visit Auschwitz. And they said, you know, okay, well, you know, there's a bit of a situation because, because there was this volcano, things are really scrambled, we can't really get people, all the people who want to go, to go at once, so we're gonna go at 2pm. So we went at 2pm, you drive, we get there and this woman who ran like another film festival was like, oh man, I didn't realize I had this screening at 6pm. It's now like 4pm. It takes like an hour to get back. And they were like, she's like, can we do an abridged version of this tour? And I'm like, an abridged version of a tour of Auschwitz? And they're like, well, it takes like three hours to walk it. And the woman's like, can we do the hour version? And I'm like, this person? And we're literally like running through Auschwitz. And they're like, that's where they, that's where they experimented on the fetuses, this

• 55:53Speaker 02

  is where they did this, and that's where they did that. And we're looking around and then the alternative, if you won, to the 200,000 euros, you can get 2 million euros to make a movie that takes place in, like, in, in Poland. So that was gonna be, the movie was gonna be this comedy that took place at Auschwitz, about the tourism industry.

• 56:14Conan O'Brien?

  Oh my god.

• 56:15Speaker 02

  But, uh...

• 56:16Conan O'Brien?

  Difficulty of the dive.

• 56:19Conan O'Brien?

  That's your, I always judge a project by difficulty of the dive. You know? Your comedy about Auschwitz is pretty good.

• 56:30Conan O'Brien?

  Wow. Well, listen, I have to say, um, I wish you all the best, cause I really did love this movie, as did so many other people, and, uh, I wish you well, and I think you're the real deal. Thank you so much for being here.

• 56:45Speaker 02

  Thank you so much, that was amazing.

• 56:54Conan O'Brien?

  You know, winning an award, that's a big achievement, right? Yeah, I love awards. Every now and then in life, maybe something nice like that comes your way. Winning them consistently is almost impossible. It just doesn't happen. You know? Well, guess what? Winning five times in six years? You know what that sounds like to me? Sustained excellence.

• 57:11Speaker 01

  Nice.

• 57:11Conan O'Brien?

  Hyundai has done just that, earning the title of America's best SUV brand for 2026 from U.S. News and World Report. You are a very happy Hyundai driver.

• 57:20Speaker 01

  I drive a Hyundai Palisade and I love my car. I love it. I love driving it around.

• 57:24Conan O'Brien?

  I've been tooling around in an Ioniq 5 N, which I love.

• 57:28Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 57:29Conan O'Brien?

  Beautiful car. Well, listen, whether you need an SUV for everyday life, your next big adventure, or extra room for family and friends, Hyundai has an option for you. The Tucson Hybrid is loaded with technology and built for everyday life. The Santa Fe Hybrid's fully capable and ready for adventure. The Palisade, that's yours, right?

• 57:44Speaker 01

  Hello.

• 57:44Conan O'Brien?

  They're gonna rename that the Sona. The Palisade Hybrid, yeah, delivers premium capability and class-leading interior space. With available, I have this memorized, H-Track all-wheel drive, up to an EPA-estimated 619 miles of range on vehicles like the Palisade Hybrid and Hyundai's industry-leading warranty. It's easy to see why Hyundai continues to deliver the quality, innovation, technology, and value drivers expect from an award-winning brand. View U.S. News Best Cars at cars.usnews.com and call 562-314-4603 for complete details.

• 58:19Conan O'Brien?

  This fall, I want to try something different.

• 58:21Speaker 01

  What?

• 58:21Conan O'Brien?

  I like to change it up. I like to learn things, so I'm gonna try and make apple cider.

• 58:25Speaker 01

  Ooh.

• 58:25Conan O'Brien?

  Every morning.

• 58:26Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 58:27Conan O'Brien?

  This fall, just to see if I can do it.

• 58:28Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 58:29Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, fall's the perfect season to try something new, like joining T-Mobile.

• 58:33Speaker 01

  Oh, that's good.

• 58:34Conan O'Brien?

  See what I did?

• 58:34Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 58:35Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, there are 250 reasons to join T-Mobile right now. You want to hear what they are?

• 58:38Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 58:39Conan O'Brien?

  They're America's best network.

• 58:40Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 58:41Conan O'Brien?

  True story. Plus, T-Mobile has got off-grid satellite coverage. That comes in really handy. I like to just wander in the woods sometimes.

• 58:48Speaker 01

  Oh, that's weird.

• 58:48Conan O'Brien?

  When I'm thinking about, like, making apple cider.

• 58:50Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 58:50Conan O'Brien?

  And that's when it comes in handy. Here's another reason. High-speed data in over 215 countries and destinations. I travel a lot for the

• 58:58Speaker 01

  You travel a lot.

• 58:58Conan O'Brien?

  Travel show that I do.

• 58:59Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 59:00Conan O'Brien?

  Stream this podcast while ignoring local landmarks. That's always fun to do. Like, oh, look, there's the Mona Lisa. Yeah, check it out. I'm in the Louvre. I should, but I'm listening to Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend.

• 59:10Speaker 01

  That doesn't seem like a good idea.

• 59:11Conan O'Brien?

  It's a great idea.

• 59:12Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 59:13Conan O'Brien?

  You know, you can see art anytime. But how often can you listen to this podcast?

• 59:18Speaker 01

  My god!

• 59:19Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. Now, all these reasons make T-Mobile a great choice.

• 59:22Speaker 01

  I agree.

• 59:23Conan O'Brien?

  T-Mobile is stacking up reasons to join. Go to T-Mobile.com and find yours best. Based on analysis by Ookla of speed test intelligence data first half of 2026. Can't believe I read that. T-Satellite with capable devices in most outdoor areas in the US where you can see the sky. High-speed international data with qualifying plan. Visit T-Mobile.com, consult a physician. I just threw that in there.

• 59:47Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 59:51Conan O'Brien?

  When you hear Alka-Seltzer, you probably think heartburn, right?

• 59:53Speaker 05

  Yep.

• 59:54Conan O'Brien?

  Well, did you know Alka-Seltzer has a line of cold and flu medications known as Alka-Seltzer Cold? Did you know that, David?

• 1:00:01Speaker 05

  No, but I feel like we need it.

• 1:00:02Conan O'Brien?

  Why didn't you know that, David?

• 1:00:04Speaker 05

  I know, you expect me to know everything.

• 1:00:06Conan O'Brien?

  I knew this because I've... Yeah, I've tried it, it's really good. And I like that fizzy, fizzy, fizzy when you drop the Alka-Seltzer Cold into the water. Alka-Seltzer Cold Fast Dissolves Tablets are designed to deliver cold and flu relief fast. Just drop the two tablets in water and hear those bubbles bursting into action. Ready to work faster than pills. Bubbles faster than pills. Pills take time to dissolve, not bubbles. Next time a cold or flu strikes, quick! Alka-Seltzer Cold. Nothing works faster for cold and flu symptom relief. Among oral products used as directed.

• 1:00:45Conan O'Brien?

  Okay, I have a burning issue I'd like to discuss.

• 1:00:47Speaker 05

  Oh.

• 1:00:48Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:48Speaker 01

  Burning?

• 1:00:48Conan O'Brien?

  No, no, not that. Creams have solved that issue. And various ointments, salves, and related balms. But that's not the point. The point is, there's something real that's happening in the world. Sona, why don't you tell the good people what I like to have maybe three days out of the week?

• 1:01:06Speaker 01

  You like to have what was formerly known as the Hailey Bieber smoothie from Arowan.

• 1:01:12Conan O'Brien?

  Yes, and so, Arowan makes this smoothie. It only costs $800. You need a cosigner at the bank. But you get this smoothie. It's very delicious and it's got various flaxes and resins. Bombs and ointments, aforementioned. It's got all kinds of stuff in it, but tastes good. And I really like it. I don't get it all the time, but I get it maybe twice, maybe three times a week, sometimes on a busy week.

• 1:01:38Speaker 01

  And your skin looks great.

• 1:01:40Conan O'Brien?

  It's been so good for my skin. And it is called the Hailey Bieber smoothie.

• 1:01:44Speaker 01

  Right.

• 1:01:45Conan O'Brien?

  Very recently, David went out and grabbed me one and he came back and he was pale as a ghost. Ashen. I just said, what happened? And he said, it's no longer called the Hailey Bieber smoothie. He looked up for it on the board. It's not there.

• 1:02:00Speaker 03

  There's not even an indicator like this is what you used to buy or formerly known as.

• 1:02:04Conan O'Brien?

  No, her name's not there. It's no longer called the Hailey Bieber smoothie. I think it's called.

• 1:02:08Speaker 01

  The strawberry glaze smoothie. So there's just no name associated with it.

• 1:02:12Conan O'Brien?

  Right. There's no celebrity name and I don't trust any product that doesn't have a celebrity name.

• 1:02:19Speaker 01

  Oh.

• 1:02:20Conan O'Brien?

  I'm very hardcore about that. Do you know what I mean? If I want to, if I'm going to grill something, it's got to be on the George Foreman grill.

• 1:02:27Speaker 03

  Will you just do any rockin' New Year's Eve or only Dick Clark's?

• 1:02:31Conan O'Brien?

  Only Dick Clark's and God rest his soul, I won't. If someone says, hey, let's rock this eve.

• 1:02:36Speaker 03

  Right.

• 1:02:36Conan O'Brien?

  I'm like, yeah, but it's not going to be just a generic rock. It's got to be the Dick Clark New Year's Rockin' Eve. So I am very much attached to celebrity endorsement. It's the only kind of product that I really, that I really want. And, or that I trust. So this has been a blow. And I do think there needs to be a celebrity name attached to that smoothie. And so this message is going out to the good people at Erawan. I know that you must be devastated. My guess is that they had Hailey Bieber under contract for a certain amount of time and it expired.

• 1:03:11Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:03:11Conan O'Brien?

  And so now they're back to just old raspberry glaze.

• 1:03:15Speaker 01

  Strawberry.

• 1:03:16Conan O'Brien?

  Okay, whatevs. Do you know what I mean? But I don't want to walk up to the counter and say, I'll have just some strawberry glaze.

• 1:03:23Speaker 01

  Boring.

• 1:03:24Conan O'Brien?

  Exactly.

• 1:03:25Speaker 01

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:03:26Speaker 03

  Where are you headed with this?

• 1:03:27Conan O'Brien?

  I think we all know.

• 1:03:28Speaker 03

  I think we do.

• 1:03:29Conan O'Brien?

  You need a celebrity attached to this and it needs to be someone who.

• 1:03:36Conan O'Brien?

  Young compared.

• 1:03:37Speaker 03

  Relevant.

• 1:03:37Conan O'Brien?

  Young compared. Hold on, it's all relative. Young compared to say people that were serving when Pearl Harbor was bombed. I think it's all relative. It's gotta be a whippersnapper, which means anyone under 70.

• 1:03:51Speaker 01

  Real hip and cool.

• 1:03:52Speaker 02

  Eduardo pulled it up, and just to chime in, it's technically, it looks like the name is the strawberry glaze skin smoothie.

• 1:03:57Conan O'Brien?

  Yes. Okay, I'm going somewhere with this.

• 1:03:59Speaker 01

  Fake nerd.

• 1:04:01Speaker 02

  Well, I just wanted to say that I think whoever they choose next, whether it be you or somebody else, they're going to want to be their model for the skin.

• 1:04:09Conan O'Brien?

  Yes, yes, okay, and this is why, what you, some people listening are like, oh, that's gonna be a problem for what Conan's about to pitch. No, no, no, no, no. It's all the more reason. A lot of people associate Conan O'Brien with, oh, his super quick wit. Hmm, you know, those bedroom eyes.

• 1:04:27Speaker 01

  The eye vein.

• 1:04:29Conan O'Brien?

  The eye vein that has been in a bedroom.

• 1:04:33Conan O'Brien?

  Though, yeah, the hair, the pompadour, you know, all that kinda stuff, whatever. First of all, I have a kinda strawberry look.

• 1:04:42Speaker 03

  That's true.

• 1:04:42Conan O'Brien?

  Yes, I do have that.

• 1:04:43Speaker 03

  Yeah, you make some points here.

• 1:04:45Conan O'Brien?

  And I do have beautiful skin. It really does glow. It really does, and, and...

• 1:04:51Speaker 03

  Because you can see light through it.

• 1:04:53Conan O'Brien?

  I, you can see my skeletal structure.

• 1:04:57Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 1:04:57Conan O'Brien?

  I am the visible woman. And so, I'm just saying, I'm, I'm a pretty big name, and, uh, yeah. Am I young? No, I'm not young, but also, I'm one of those people where you're like, you're not really sure how old that guy is. If you don't have immediate access to the internet. So, um, and I behave in a very youthful manner. I'm very immature.

• 1:05:23Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:05:23Conan O'Brien?

  So, all I'm saying is, I am willing to lend my name, and when I say lend, yes, there will be financial compensation. But I am willing to throw my hat into the ring, cause I'm sure other celebrities are pitching this hard. I know for a fact that Paul Rudd was in there two days ago. Just screaming at them to call it the Paul Rudd. And that is a death knell.

• 1:05:48Speaker 01

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:05:48Conan O'Brien?

  For that, yes.

• 1:05:49Speaker 02

  Does it have to be that one, or? Are you open to naming any one of their?

• 1:05:53Conan O'Brien?

  This is my opening. It's a very popular smoothie, Eduardo. Why would you cockblock me with this?

• 1:05:58Speaker 02

  They have like a whole bunch more.

• 1:05:59Conan O'Brien?

  Let's see what we got here. All right.

• 1:06:01Speaker 03

  They have an incessant bits smoothie? That should be you.

• 1:06:07Conan O'Brien?

  There's an incessant bit smoothie that they already have and it says made with real comedy bits.

• 1:06:11Speaker 03

  You should choose the always on.

• 1:06:13Speaker 01

  I feel like this has to be it because this is the one you drink all the time.

• 1:06:16Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, look. Perfect amino choco revive.

• 1:06:20Speaker 03

  By Gary Brekka. That one's got a name.

• 1:06:22Speaker 01

  Who's Gary Brekka? You're, I would do the Conan O'Brien smoothie.

• 1:06:25Conan O'Brien?

  If they're putting Gary Brekka's name on a smoothie, then my, yes?

• 1:06:27Speaker 02

  I think he's like a longevity expert.

• 1:06:29Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, yeah, okay. We'll see. Yeah, exactly. Let's see. Gorgy Cherry Crush? I mean, if it's not, I'm putting my name in for this because there's a void.

• 1:06:43Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:06:44Conan O'Brien?

  But if it has to be another smoothie, we can talk about that later, but you've opened a whole can of worms here.

• 1:06:50Speaker 01

  Yeah, I think it, this makes sense because you.

• 1:06:53Conan O'Brien?

  I enjoy it.

• 1:06:54Speaker 01

  Yeah, you're, you're red.

• 1:06:56Conan O'Brien?

  I'm plugging it right now. I am red. I have luminous skin.

• 1:07:00Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:07:01Conan O'Brien?

  I am married to Justin Bieber.

• 1:07:04Speaker 01

  You're like, if, if you can't get Hailey Bieber, you seem like the obvious second choice to Hailey Bieber. So that makes sense.

• 1:07:11Conan O'Brien?

  Yes.

• 1:07:11Speaker 01

  Um, I think, I actually think it would serve them well.

• 1:07:15Conan O'Brien?

  But can't you see people saying, I want the Conan O'Brien? I want the Conan O'Brien. Be honest. Can you see them doing that?

• 1:07:19Speaker 01

  I actually would. I'm not even joking. I would, I think that Erawan should name this smoothie after you. But wait, when you say compensation, like, what do you mean? Like, do you want like $200?

• 1:07:31Conan O'Brien?

  I'm not fucking around here, okay? First of all, I would get my representation involved and I would just start to hammer Erawan. And I mean hammer them.

• 1:07:39Speaker 01

  Okay, but that might not work.

• 1:07:40Conan O'Brien?

  First of all, I'd go in and I'd say, what did Hailey Bieber get? They would give an amount and I'd say, I get 80% more. I've been around a lot longer. I think I have even better skin than her. It glows more. What?

• 1:07:51Speaker 01

  No, but, but you don't.

• 1:07:53Speaker 03

  Are you at all worried?

• 1:07:54Conan O'Brien?

  Don't what?

• 1:07:54Speaker 01

  You don't have that much skin.

• 1:07:55Conan O'Brien?

  Don't yuck my yum.

• 1:07:57Speaker 03

  Are you worried at all?

• 1:07:58Speaker 01

  Not, you're not using it right.

• 1:08:00Speaker 03

  You know, Lazenby followed Connery for Bond.

• 1:08:02Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:02Speaker 03

  You know, that, that.

• 1:08:03Conan O'Brien?

  Lazenby was great. Lazenby did a good job.

• 1:08:06Speaker 03

  He did.

• 1:08:06Conan O'Brien?

  A lot of people, when you say James Bond, they think Lazenby.

• 1:08:09Speaker 01

  Oh, boy.

• 1:08:09Conan O'Brien?

  They don't think, no, he's one of the best Bonds. And he's one of the Bonds people think about the most, even though he only did for Her Majesty's Secret Service.

• 1:08:17Speaker 03

  Or on Her Majesty's Secret Service.

• 1:08:19Speaker 01

  Okay. But wouldn't it be like going from Sean Connery to like?

• 1:08:23Conan O'Brien?

  That's what he just said.

• 1:08:25Speaker 01

  No, but I'm saying to go from him.

• 1:08:28Speaker 03

  I said to me like Sean Connery to like Mickey Rooney.

• 1:08:30Speaker 01

  Yes, thank you. Well, no, I was thinking someone even, yeah, like older.

• 1:08:36Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 1:08:36Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, older than Sean Connery.

• 1:08:38Speaker 03

  Mickey Rooney was long dead.

• 1:08:40Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:41Speaker 03

  And was old before he died.

• 1:08:42Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:43Speaker 03

  Really old.

• 1:08:44Speaker 01

  Yeah, but like, you know, like, I don't know, Abraham Lincoln. Where like.

• 1:08:51Conan O'Brien?

  Have you seen Lincoln's skin? Very dry. Look at those Brady portraits. He's got very dry skin.

• 1:08:57Speaker 01

  I just think there's so many young people that go that know Hailey Bieber. I'm not saying young people don't know you, because I know young people know you.

• 1:09:05Conan O'Brien?

  Oh, they know Conan O'Brien and they have to deal with Conan O'Brien. They have to accept him as a reality. Um, I don't even know what I'm saying now.

• 1:09:12Speaker 01

  Why? But why? Why do they have to deal with you?

• 1:09:14Conan O'Brien?

  I'm like gravity. You gotta deal with me sooner or later.

• 1:09:17Speaker 01

  What the fuck?

• 1:09:17Conan O'Brien?

  I'm gravity.

• 1:09:20Conan O'Brien?

  I will get you sooner or later. Ah, there's no escaping this Conan O'Brien.

• 1:09:25Speaker 01

  Oh, my God.

• 1:09:25Conan O'Brien?

  He's not even my generation.

• 1:09:27Speaker 03

  What if this actually does turn into Erawan coming back and saying, let's do this?

• 1:09:30Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:09:31Conan O'Brien?

  Uh, great.

• 1:09:32Speaker 03

  I know.

• 1:09:33Conan O'Brien?

  Hey, also, when I said great, I meant great for Erawan. Great for them.

• 1:09:37Speaker 01

  Yeah.

• 1:09:37Conan O'Brien?

  Great for anyone who likes a good smoothie and wants to see it succeed. Because I bet there are a lot of people like me who need a celebrity endorsement to really trust a product.

• 1:09:47Speaker 03

  Let me ask you this.

• 1:09:48Conan O'Brien?

  Okay.

• 1:09:48Speaker 03

  Let's say they come back to you and they're like, we want to change it to Conan O'Brien, the Conan O'Brien smoothie. We feel we need to lower the price a little.

• 1:09:58Speaker 03

  We need to reduce the price by about 90%.

• 1:10:02Conan O'Brien?

  You having a good laugh over there?

• 1:10:03Speaker 01

  I removed most of the good ingredients.

• 1:10:05Conan O'Brien?

  How you doing over there Chuckles?

• 1:10:07Speaker 03

  It's just crushed ice and some unpasteurized milk.

• 1:10:13Conan O'Brien?

  With sprinkles, with a swirl of asbestos.

• 1:10:18Conan O'Brien?

  We got real 1950's asbestos and swirled it in. Listen, I accept the realities of the marketplace.

• 1:10:24Speaker 03

  She knows dust.

• 1:10:25Conan O'Brien?

  I am a capitalist and I believe in the, I live and die by the capitalist system. So I accept the realities of the marketplace. Am I as attractive as Hailey Bieber? No, I am not. Am I as vital? Am I as much a hero to the young people? I get it, I'm not. So yes, it'd be a price reduction. Yes, they would probably have to discontinue some of the really good stuff that's in there and replace it with, I'll just say, older stuff.

• 1:10:54Speaker 03

  Same ingredients, but they're like weeks old.

• 1:10:56Conan O'Brien?

  No, not weeks old.

• 1:10:58Speaker 01

  What if they changed the name?

• 1:11:02Conan O'Brien?

  All the ingredients have to be from the Kennedy administration.

• 1:11:05Speaker 01

  Yeah, but I mean would you-

• 1:11:06Conan O'Brien?

  Milk that's still left over from the Kennedy administration.

• 1:11:10Speaker 01

  Wouldn't you change the name of it though? Instead of just being the Conan O'Brien smoothie, wouldn't it be something a little bit more fun? Like the, I don't know.

• 1:11:18Speaker 03

  He needs that name recognition.

• 1:11:19Conan O'Brien?

  I need the name.

• 1:11:20Speaker 01

  Okay.

• 1:11:20Conan O'Brien?

  People want the name.

• 1:11:21Speaker 01

  Maybe you could have a descriptor in the name of who you are. And then they, like in parentheses, he hosted a show for a long time. Your parents would know who he is or something like, I don't know.

• 1:11:33Conan O'Brien?

  This is a bummer. Ask your parents?

• 1:11:35Speaker 03

  The Ask Your Parents smoothie.

• 1:11:37Conan O'Brien?

  No, Sona, this is not what we're doing.

• 1:11:39Speaker 03

  It's just ground up K rations with the metal tin included.

• 1:11:41Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:11:44Conan O'Brien?

  We took Korean War rations. Put them in a blender.

• 1:11:51Conan O'Brien?

  We found some government issued peanut butter from 1963.

• 1:11:56Speaker 03

  And some Lucky Strike cigarettes.

• 1:12:01Conan O'Brien?

  Listen, I, I, I get it. Yes, you are right. There have to be some adjustments to the product. I understand that. These Erawan people aren't dumb. They'll do the right thing. Um, and I get it. I'm, I have some humility, but I will replace Hailey Beefer and it will be the Conan O'Brien smoothie. I'm going to make this happen.

• 1:12:23Speaker 03

  To be continued. I hope so.

• 1:12:24Conan O'Brien?

  Yeah. All right. If the ball's in your court, Erawan, if that's even a real name.

• 1:12:32Speaker 03

  Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend with Conan O'Brien, Sonam of Sessian and Matt Gourley. Produced by me, Matt Gourley. Executive produced by Adam Sachs, Jeff Ross and Nick Liao. Theme song by The White Stripes. Incidental music by Jimmy Vivino. Take it away, Jimmy.

• 1:12:52Speaker 03

  Our supervising producer is Aaron Blair and our associate talent producer is Jennifer Samples. Engineering and mixing by Eduardo Perez and Brendan Burns. Additional production support by Mars Melnick. Talent booking by Paula Davis, Gina Batista and Britt Kahn. You can rate and review this show on Apple Podcasts and you might find your review read on a future episode. Got a question for Conan? Call the Team Coco hotline at 669-587-2847 and leave a message. It too could be featured on a future episode. You can also get three free months of Sirius XM when you sign up at siriusxm.com/conan. And if you haven't already, please subscribe to Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend wherever fine podcasts are downloaded.

• 1:13:43Conan O'Brien?

  When you hear Alka Seltzer, you probably think heartburn, right?

• 1:13:45Speaker 05

  Yep.

• 1:13:46Conan O'Brien?

  Well, did you know Alka Seltzer has a line of cold and flu medications known as Alka Seltzer Cold? Did you know that, David?

• 1:13:53Speaker 05

  No, but I feel like we need it.

• 1:13:54Conan O'Brien?

  Why didn't you know that, David?

• 1:13:56Speaker 05

  I know. You expect me to know everything.

• 1:13:58Conan O'Brien?

  I knew this because I, yeah, I've tried it. It's really good. And I like that fizzy, fizzy, fizzy when you drop the Alka Seltzer Cold into the water. Alka Seltzer Cold Fast Dissolves Tablets are designed to deliver cold and flu relief. Fast. Just drop the two tablets in water and hear those bubbles bursting into action, ready to work faster than pills. Bubbles faster than pills. Pills take time to dissolve, not bubbles. Next time a cold or flu strikes, quick! Alka-Seltzer, cold. Nothing works faster for cold and flu symptom relief. Among oral products, use as directed.

• 1:14:31Speaker 06

  Having lots of choices sounds like it would be great. Who doesn't want more flavors of ice cream? It turns out, the answer is us. Too many choices can make us anxious, overwhelmed. I'm Shankar Vedantam, host of the Hidden Brain Podcast and YouTube channel. Each week, Hidden Brain brings you fascinating, science-backed insights about human behavior. So the next time you have to choose, choose Hidden Brain on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube, or hiddenbrain.org.