Pod Insights The Prof G Pod with Scott Galloway Scott’s Early Career Advice, How Dating Apps Are Making You Lonelier, and Navigating Conflict With Business Partners About this episode Scott Galloway gives his advice for navigating your early career, explains how dating apps are a "winner-take-all” game, and discusses how to deal with a distracted business partner.
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Transcript Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.
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1:36 Scott Galloway? Welcome to Office Hours with Prop G. This is the part of the show where we answer your questions about business, big tech, entrepreneurship, and whatever else is on your mind. If you'd like to submit a question for next time, you can send a voice recording to [email protected] . Again, that's [email protected] or post your question on the Scott Galloway subreddit and we just might feature it on our next episode. Our first question comes from Rachel Sarecki on LinkedIn. Rachel says, I'm an upcoming college graduate. What would you do differently when you first started your career? Any advice for navigating early career life? Huh. What your first job most likely will be is something you hate. And that is young, a kind of, or first time jobs are usually shitty jobs, usually doing all the work that people who have some power don't want to do.
2:20 Scott Galloway? So if you find yourself, if you wake up and think, wow, I don't love this, that's probably where you should be. What do you want in your first job? You want a place where you're going to learn. Not only skills, but learn what you like and don't like. One of the biggest blessings I, greatest things I got from Morgan Stanley was wanting attention to detail. It was an incredibly abusive environment and I don't, I mean, I quite frankly, think that was good for me. It kind of toughened me up. A lot of guardrails, you had to show up in a tie, you had to be well-prepared. I would re prospectus backwards to try and find the difference if I'd said base rental payments, apostrophe S or S apostrophe, and then go back through the document. This is before AI.
3:01 Scott Galloway? And it was incredibly taxing and stressful, but I kind of needed a swift kick in the ass. And also the brand itself and the platform, I think, obviously helped me for the rest of my life and helped me get into business school. And I was around really talented people. So what do you want to do in your first job? You want to find a place where you can learn, ideally a good platform or brand. I think the office is a feature, not a bug. I would really, really advise against taking, doing remote work. When you're young, you need to find friends, mentors and mates. One of three relationships begins at work and HR people hate that. But show me an HR person who's putting in all these strict policies around dating. I'll show you someone who, you know, found his wife at work.
3:43 Scott Galloway? So get into the office, try and get to a good platform. If you're working, try and go somewhere that'll let you run flat out. One of the things I did, and this sounds strange and you couldn't do this now or they wouldn't let you. I was, I wasn't as skilled as the other 87 analysts in the class of 89 at Morgan Stanley. They all went to Ivy Leagues, they were better educated than me, not because UCLA wasn't a great education, but because I see above 2.27, I didn't really do much. So I thought, okay, what is my advantage? I don't have a girlfriend, I don't have dogs, I'm living at home. I didn't even have a lot of friends at that point because most of my friends had scattered. Every Tuesday morning, I'd go in at 9 a.m. and I would stay till 6 p.m. the following Wednesday because I wanted to send a signal that I was here to play.
4:28 Scott Galloway? And unfortunately, Morgan Stanley was the kind of abusive behavior where they, where they sort of rewarded that. I think they used to give us a clean white shirt the next morning. At the end of the year, they'd line up all the analysts and count how many white shirts or how many of them had pulled all-nighters. But it was important for me, I was, what I'll call, despite having shitty grades, I was physically strong. I rode cruise, so I felt like I, I knew how to push my limits. So what do I, what did I did that was smart? I got into a good platform. I worked my ass off. I was very focused on work. I took down the alcohol and the pot intake for a couple of years. And I just sort of wanted to show that I was here to, here to play. Because the sad truth of your career is that people say, oh, enjoy your twenties and have fun.
5:13 Scott Galloway? Anyone who tells you to do that is already fucking rich. Unfortunately, in a capitalist society, your twenties sort of dictate your trajectory into your thirties and forties and your, your ability to kind of get to the right positions in your thirties and forties to really then aggregate influence and economic security are somewhat a function of the trajectory or the scale or the velocity you establish in your twenties. The metaphor I would use is a projectile or a rocket getting into space. And that is the majority of the fuel expectorated in a launch vehicle, you know, whether it's a Falcon Heavy rocket or Saturn rockets or whatever, it's in the first few miles. The lower orbit is soupy. It is really hard to get traction right out of school. So you want to burn a lot of fuel. What does that mean?
5:57 Scott Galloway? You want to work really fucking hard. You want to try really hard. You want to invest in relationships, be seen as a good ally, do shit work, have a great attitude, just be curious. You know, just try and be the most pleasant, hardworking version of yourself, if you will, right out of school. The other thing I would suggest is that you, you try and find mentors, ask people out for coffee, develop a kitchen cabinet of people who advise you. When you ask people for help, And they say yes, they become emotionally invested in your success. The most loyal or patriotic Americans are veterans. Why? Because they've invested so much in America. And my first boss, this guy Carter Cordner, I used to constantly be in his office asking for advice.
6:41 Scott Galloway? And he started taking me to UCLA basketball games and he took a shine to me. I think it made me one of the few reasons I wasn't fired. I was not very good at that job and but he really liked me and was invested in my success, wrote my letters of rec, and I really invested in the in the relationship, if you will. So this is a time to work your ass off. Find a platform where ideally it's a good brand, where you're going to learn a lot. Absolutely get into the office, try and invest in relationships and also just realize it's a soupy atmosphere and you're going to burn a lot of fuel. You need to try really hard and work really hard. And also forgive yourself if you don't like what you're doing. That's a gift. I figured out almost right away I was not cut out to be an investment banker. And that's a gift too, because I realized what I didn't want to do. But that's fine.
7:23 Scott Galloway? Your twenties is for workshopping, not only finding what you like to do, but what you don't like to do. Now, having said that, give everything at least two or three years. Try really hard, show up, be on time. And the objective in your twenties is not to find your passion. It's to find something you could be good slash great at. And so every job you're in, think, okay, could I be in the top 10% of whatever it is I'm doing within, say, five years? And could I be in the top 1% in a decade? Because if you're in the top 10% of something, you're going to make a really good living at it. And if you're in the top 1%, you're going to get prestige, relevance, camaraderie that will make you passionate about whatever that thing is. So that's my advice. But I think the key thing is invest a ton in relationships early.
8:08 Scott Galloway? Work hard, be nice, be supportive of your peers. I was too fucking competitive and too jealous of my peers. I was so immature, should have invested more in their success and tried to establish stronger relationships. And also recognize if you don't love your job and it's hard, that's exactly where you should be. And, you know, realize that it's just as much about figuring out what you don't want to do is what you want to do. Oh, my God, that was a word salad. Thanks for the question. Question number two comes from Pormia Jarber on Reddit. Pormia Jarber? They ask, hi Scott, you've been one of the clearest voices calling out the damage social media platforms have done to society, especially young people, but I haven't heard the same level of criticism toward dating apps.
8:50 Scott Galloway? It seems these platforms have had an equally corrosive impact on expectations of the opposite sex and how money and status gets signaled through a screen. Do you think dating apps have been just as reckless in contributing to loneliness and social withdrawal? Should they be included in the same resist and unsubscribe category? And if not, why do they get a pass? Super interesting question. All right, so just some data. About a third of US adults say they've used a dating app. Among young people, it's closer to half. Men significantly outnumber women. It's about 60%. By the way, the ultimate dating app where it flips is college. It's 60/40 female to male. Some data from our newsletter, No Mercy to Mouse, unhinged the top 10% of men, receives 60% of the likes. For women, it's 45%. So again, more of that Porsche polygamy.
9:33 Scott Galloway? On the internet, everyone has access to everyone and the digitization of the market results. So that... So part of the resist and unsubscribe movement is sort of this Genghis Khan. Is it Genghis Khan or Genghis Khan? But he basically went after, he would go after a single city, kill all the dudes, rape all the women, burn the place down, and then point to the next city and say, we're about to do the same thing here, or you can just lay down your weapons and we're actually fairly decent people, join our army. There doesn't need to be any bloodshed. But you went after one city at a time. And what I'm actually thinking about with resist and unsubscribe is narrowing it down to a smaller number of targets, maybe even just one target in March. Kind of go Genghis on them. Go GK on them. Anyways, dating apps, yeah. I don't think they should be on resist and unsubscribe because they don't have a market cap big enough.
10:18 Scott Galloway? But essentially, the digitization of any environment or any market creates a winner take most environment. You digitize retail, then you end up with one company, Amazon, who through great execution and access to cheap capital, gets 50% of all online commerce. Same thing's happened in dating, except more on the supply side. What do I mean by that? Essentially, when everyone has access to everyone and it becomes digitized, then everybody wants the same people, especially... Women who are more choosy. The basic anthropological incentives are the following. Men want to spread. Men have millions of sperm. Women have one egg. So men feel it's their job to spread their seed to the four corners of the earth. We're just much less choosy and quite frankly, hornier.
11:00 Scott Galloway? Women are put up a much finer screen to pick the smartest, fastest and strongest seed. That's why your kids will likely be smarter and taller than you. Now, how does millions of seed get through this much finer screen? Typically, it's been work, friends, religious institutions, school where people meet. Those used to be the top places for people to connect. And one of the keys to those environments was that people had a chance, specifically men had a chance to demonstrate excellence. The difference was back in the olden days, I until the dating apps took over, men had venues to demonstrate excellence. Women say, well, I didn't like him at first, but I liked how kind he was to his parents. I liked his hands. I liked the way he danced. He had wonderful friends. He was really funny. They got a chance to demonstrate excellence over time.
11:43 Scott Galloway? With dating apps, you don't really have a chance to demonstrate excellence. It's been distilled down to a small number of observable digital criteria. What's happened with dating apps is that the choosiness versus lack of choosiness has gone crazy. And the stat is, and I hate the incel movement, that 80% of women want the same 20% of men. But there's some truth to the notion that most of the women will all be attracted to the same men. And unfortunately, it's kind of a few basic things. It's sort of height and perceived resources. So the, I hate this term, but people use it. Six feet, six figures. When you see all these women being interviewed about dating, they say, well, at a minimum, six feet, six figures. Because six feet, if you will, are height is measurable.
12:28 Scott Galloway? Height was an issue when I was younger and mating, but it wasn't the issue it is now. Online dating has taught, taught people to think, okay, here's a distillable analytical measurable metric, height. And then your money, where you went to school, the watch that's accidentally, the Rolex that actually slips into your profile, where you live. But over time, men got to demonstrate excellence in person. Now those venues for demonstrating excellence, people aren't going to school as much, remote work. They're not going to religious institutions. Men ages 20 to 30. Spending less time outdoors than prison inmates. So the dating apps have really, what have they done? They have aggregated currency to the most attractive.
13:11 Scott Galloway? And in some, if you're a dude on a dating app, if you're in the top 10% of attractiveness, it's fucking disco, right? You can have a date every night, uh, which unfortunately doesn't lead to good long-term behavior or investing in long-term relationships because you kind of think, why should I? And I think generally for women, it's just shittier, a little bit shittier all around. And the bottom 90% of men end up just very discouraged and unfortunately start developing kind of misogynistic tendencies because they hold women accountable for their rejection or their lack of self-esteem because they don't have a place to demonstrate excellence. And also there's a generally a rule of threes that I apply to some of the young men I coach. And that is if you want to be in the top 5% of men in terms of attractiveness, you need to do only three things, especially young men.
13:56 Scott Galloway? Work out at least three times a week, work at least 30 hours a week outside of the home and put yourself in the agency of strangers in the company of doing something bigger than yourself at least three times a month. That puts you no shit in the top 5%. And if you're in the top 5% long enough, you're going to find a potential mate or really interesting friends. So what has online dating done? It has consolidated the market. It's been great for the top and it's been really harsh on the bottom 90. But I don't think in terms of resisting unsubscribe, I want to go after whatever it is. Was it Flutter? No, that's a gaming one. Match.com, they just not worth it. They're not worth as much. Me going after dating sites, I don't know. I think they're bigger, bigger game to go to fell, if you will, or to go after.
14:39 Scott Galloway? But the digitization of the dating market has become a winner take most attribute similar to the way America is being run. And I think it has really been harmful to most young people who are very discouraged, especially the bottom 90 of men. But also it sort of leads men to give up on dating. Supposedly about 62% of men under the age of 30 aren't even trying to date. And I fucking hate the incel movement. You're not an incel. You're a V cell. You're voluntarily celibate. The majority of men through 99% of history have been involuntarily celibate. Yeah, you gotta level up. There's very few things men would rather be doing than having sex. Okay, but you've got to earn it. You've got to work out. You have to have a plan. You have to be nice. You have to persevere. You have to have resilience. Need to put on a fucking clean shirt, smell nice groom,
15:24 Scott Galloway? and then put yourself in the company of strangers where you can take risks and realize if someone's not interested in you and you're polite and excuse yourself, you're both gonna be fine. Right? Instead, they give up, start blaming immigrants for their economic problems, start blaming women for their romantic problems, and they become quote unquote incels like it's a badge of honor. No, it's not, brother. No, it's not. The majority of us have been incels. But you know what we do? We fucking level up. And men in America today have more agency than men have had and through 99% of history, throughout history, 80% of women have reproduced and only 40% of men. The natural state of being in the mating market throughout history is Porsha polygamy. And that is a small number of men through inheritance or exceptional talent aggregate a lot of influence and power
16:09 Scott Galloway? and have multiple sexual partners. And the bottom, the bottom half of men have none. So what do we do to level up people? We need more third places. We need to put more money in the pockets of young people. And also, young people, especially men, recognize the dating apps are not the dating world. And if you're not successful on dating apps, don't get too discouraged. Find real world places where you can meet people and demonstrate excellence and level up. You have more agency. Only 40% of men have reproduced through history in America. It's 80% of women. That hasn't changed, but it's 75% of men. So all you have to do, if you're interested in having a family, which supposedly is the number one priority for, for men on the right, is be in the top three quarters.
16:54 Scott Galloway? And you know how you end up in the lower quarter? You give up and you start resenting people for your fucking problems. No, boss, you're not involuntarily celibate. You're voluntarily celibate. Welcome to the fucking work week. Level up.
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20:37 Scott Galloway? Welcome back. Onto our final question, which comes from Tate and Stormy on Instagram. "How should I approach a business partner that I feel is taking on too many other projects? Have you experienced this?"
20:48 Scott Galloway? I have always started businesses with partners. I travel a lot for business. And inevitably, wherever I'm, somewhere amazing, I'll be in Paris, I used to work with LVMH or advise them, and Clarence and Chanel. Inevitably, if I'm alone, I end up getting upgraded to the presidential suite with a view of the Aiffel Tower. And when I'm in a hotel alone in some amazing place, if I'm not with someone, it's like it didn't happen. And so, building businesses with other people, it's just, it's just very rewarding. It's like building a life with someone else. Yeah, it doesn't really happen. I remember from the age of 20 to 30, I just didn't have very many people in my life. And then when my mom died, I felt like when anything good happened to me, it didn't really happen because there was no one to celebrate it with. So I really enjoy building businesses with partners.
21:33 Scott Galloway? Now, what you need to do is just have very fluid, open, respectful communication. I've typically started businesses with people that, you know, I like or could be friends with. And I have started businesses with friends because the first thing you have to bring to a partnership is generosity. Because at some point, you'll be adding more value than your partner, or they'll be more adding value, adding more value than you. And if you're constantly measuring each other's contribution and arguing with each other, there's nothing that tears down a great small business like the partners feuding. That is often, that can just kill a business. So if your partner is working on too many things at once, what I would suggest is you're open and honest and say, look, in a small business, we need to be snipers here. It's got to be a sniper rifle, not a buckshot. It has to be, you know, the specific crowds out the general.
22:18 Scott Galloway? One of the key advantages of a small company is it can be so focused on such a small niche, you can just own it. You know, at L2, we were competing against McKinsey, and I'm not exaggerating, we were beating them because like, we benchmark the digital footprint of prestige brands. That is just what we do. That's all we do. We don't do anything else. We're not going to do your supply chain. We're not going to do Kaddafi's PR. I mean, whatever else McKinsey does, we, we're not going to figure out the right shipping routes or ship you should acquire a company. We're about, okay, Vuitton, how does your Instagram and your mobile and your ecommerce measure up against Bottega, Veneta, or whoever they perceive as their competition? So focus is super important. And what I would suggest you have a conversation with your partners is just express your fears that
23:02 Scott Galloway? we're spreading ourselves too thin, that as a small company, our advantage is focus. And if you guys continue to not get along, you may want to bring in a coach, or even if you can. I always tried to assemble boards, even when I didn't need them, because I thought they were helpful just to work through issues, get their advice, to get their contacts. But you guys may want to enlist a coach or someone who you both like and trust to kind of mediate. I have a friend who has a sports league and his partner, they, they have built something amazing, but. Quite frankly, they don't get along. And by the way, my, I always get caught, I'm boasting now, but oftentimes I have found, I go on boards, I get put on boards by a friend of mine who's a distressed credit investor, who's this brilliant, hard-charging guy.
23:45 Scott Galloway? And more often than not, I end up being Switzerland, or the buffer zone, or the 55th parallel between him and the CEO, who usually is some alpha male who thinks he's never wrong either. And within about three board meetings, they're locking horns. So having someone that you guys can meet with regularly, maybe assembling a kitchen cabinet to say, no, these two or three things are worth taking risks on, your partner trusts, or they can say, yeah, this guy's right, you're spread too thin, you need to, these all may be great opportunities, but maybe not great opportunities for you right now because you need to be focused. In sum, open, honest, generous dialogue. And two, if that's not working, bring in an outside party that you both respect and trust to discuss through these issues and help you make decisions. Thanks very much. That's all for this episode.
24:30 Scott Galloway? If you'd like to submit a question, please email a voice recording to [email protected] . That's [email protected] . Or if you prefer to ask on Reddit, just post your question on the Scott Galloway subreddit, and we might feature it in an upcoming episode.
24:45 Scott Galloway? This episode was produced by Jennifer Sanchez and Laura Janer. Kami Rique is our social producer. Brad Williams is our editor. Andrew Burrows is our technical director. Thank you for listening to the Prop G Pod from Prop G Media.
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