Pod Insights Conan O'Brien Needs A Friend Conan O’Brien Must Go: New Zealand Roundtable Discussion About this episode Conan sits down with writers Mike Sweeney, Jessie Gaskell, and Jose Arroyo to discuss shooting Conan O’Brien Must Go in New Zealand, being joined by Taika Waititi at the record-breaking haka, meeting Conan’s New Zealander name twin, and more.
Transcript 5,605 words · 10 speakers
Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.
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1:20 Speaker 02 Conan O'Brien needs a fan. Wanna talk to Conan? Visit teamcoco.com/callconan. Okay, let's get started.
1:29 Conan O'Brien? Okay, welcome. If you are listening to this program right now, and you are because you can hear my voice, which is proof that you're hearing it. Again, we're doing something a little different. We did this last week. Last week, we did a podcast about the Spain-Madrid episode of Conan O'Brien Must Go, because that's when it dropped. Well, guess what? Today is the day that episode two in the series drops. And today's episode then is about New Zealand, because that is where I traveled. I am joined by the crack team, as opposed to the team on crack. Why not both? These are all good questions. And we'll edit them out.
2:13 Conan O'Brien? Terrific team. Mike Sweeney, of course, at the helm. Came in a little late, wearing one of the three shirts he owns.
2:19 Speaker 03 Yeah.
2:20 Conan O'Brien? And I'm also joined by Jesse.
2:22 Speaker 04 It's my favorite.
2:23 Conan O'Brien? Jesse Gaskell.
2:24 Speaker 03 It takes time to pick them out.
2:25 Conan O'Brien? Okay. Worth interrupting Jesse's intro for that little sprinkle.
2:32 Conan O'Brien? Jesse Gaskell, terrific writer, producer, joke writer. And Jose Arroyo, also a terrific comedic mind. And both of you have joined.
2:44 Speaker 04 Being nice to us.
2:45 Conan O'Brien? It's a trap.
2:45 Speaker 03 What a setup.
2:46 Conan O'Brien? It's a trap. What you do is you put honey in the trap. And then they fall into the pit and out of the spikes. This team, this unit, has come on most of the travel shows, just about all of them, if not all of them. And I'm talking about the TBS days. And all those Conan Without Border shows. And now on the Max series, Conan O'Brien Must Go, Season Two. We are today discussing the second episode in the series, which is New Zealand. Guys, what did you think? It's out right now.
3:18 Speaker 03 Out right now as we speak.
3:20 Speaker 05 It's amazing. I loved it from, I actually saw it just to prepare for this.
3:27 Conan O'Brien? Oh, was that true? You did some?
3:28 Speaker 05 I did a little homework.
3:29 Conan O'Brien? You did preparation for this? Okay.
3:32 Speaker 05 And I saw it.
3:33 Speaker 04 No, you're not ever supposed to watch these again. That's how it works.
3:37 Conan O'Brien? So how does it hold up?
3:39 Speaker 05 It holds up really, really well.
3:41 Speaker 03 Your voice went up. Sorry.
3:44 Speaker 03 No, go ahead.
3:45 Speaker 05 No, no, it holds up really well. And it just, you jump from the North Island to the South. And you cover, we covered a lot of ground.
3:53 Speaker 04 Covered a lot of ground, which is, yeah. I mean, that's hard in that country because it involves flights and driving and.
3:58 Conan O'Brien? One of the things that we have found is, in our travels, is that, you know, we go, and the premise of the show is I visit fans that have reached out to me through the podcast. And so these fans were pretty well distributed around both islands, the North and the South. I learned a lot. I had never been to New Zealand before. The people were extraordinary. They were lovely. We learned a lot about the ancient culture.
4:26 Speaker 04 The Maori.
4:27 Conan O'Brien? The Maori culture and.
4:30 Speaker 03 Not so ancient. It turns out they've only occupied the island for 800 years.
4:34 Speaker 04 Longer than the one. Is that true?
4:35 Speaker 03 Yeah. That's what, that's what they were saying. Yeah, during that. Welcoming ceremony, which I thought was fascinating.
4:41 Speaker 04 And who was there before that?
4:42 Conan O'Brien? Before that, it was a medical conference.
4:45 Speaker 03 Get away.
4:46 Conan O'Brien? It was for Ba- and it was for Baushen Loam and uh.
4:53 Conan O'Brien? And it was interesting because when we went, before we began filming, we were taken by a Maori guide to this mountaintop that looked over, this is in the North Island, in Auckland. And uh, he, there was a, a long discussion about the history and then he led a ceremony. It was kind of moving.
5:12 Speaker 04 Blessing the film shoot.
5:14 Conan O'Brien? Yes, he was blessing the, the film shoot. Another, another inch, right? Yeah, and uh.
5:19 Speaker 04 Which we should always do, really.
5:20 Speaker 03 Yes.
5:21 Conan O'Brien? We should, oh, okay. So when I go to the American Girl store to drink too much with a doll, we should be a blessing first at the American Girl store. Yeah, it was, it was, it was really nice to be introduced to the culture and then visit the fans and we learned a lot. Our visit coincided with something that is in the Guinness Book of World Records, which is part of the show, which is, there is a, a ritual there called the Hakka to the uninitiated, just, it looks kind of like a, a dance routine, like a very old kind of.
5:55 Speaker 04 It's like a flash mob.
5:56 Conan O'Brien? Yeah, it looks like a flash mob, but uh, it's something that's performed. It's been around for, I'm guessing, hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of years and it's very important to the culture. And they tried to break the world's record for the largest number of people doing the Hakka at the same time. So they filled a stadium and I was joined by none other than.
6:16 Speaker 04 Taika Waititi.
6:17 Conan O'Brien? Taika Waititi, who uh, helped out. And so that makes for a fun segment. There's a, there were a lot of, um, I, when I look at the footage of that now, when we were editing, I was stunned by how many people were doing the Hakka at the same time. Because when you're doing it, you're just, you're in yourself, you're doing it, you're not quite aware. But when you look.
6:37 Speaker 04 When you had just learned it too, so you were probably focusing on the moves.
6:40 Conan O'Brien? Oh, I was just trying to remember.
6:42 Speaker 03 Yeah.
6:42 Conan O'Brien? Uh, how to do this correctly. And it's intimidating because on one side I had a, you know, Maori guide. Expert.
6:50 Speaker 04 Mm hmm.
6:50 Conan O'Brien? And on the other side, I had Taika.
6:53 Speaker 04 Yeah.
6:54 Conan O'Brien? And people watching from the Guinness Book of World Records, and it's being recorded, so I was.
6:58 Speaker 04 Lots of news cameras, yeah.
7:00 Conan O'Brien? Lots of news cameras. I was in my head about, let's do this correctly.
7:02 Speaker 04 Well, I was, I didn't go on the New Zealand trip, um, cause I was.
7:07 Conan O'Brien? You can leave now.
7:08 Speaker 04 Trying to figure out how to leave my baby. Um, but.
7:12 Conan O'Brien? Which is a code for battling your addiction.
7:17 Speaker 04 Yes, I was in, I was in rehab.
7:19 Conan O'Brien? Yes, exactly. And you were at New Horizons.
7:21 Speaker 04 Oh, I fell off the baby again.
7:25 Conan O'Brien? You know, it's crazy, can I just back up for a second?
7:27 Speaker 04 Yeah.
7:27 Conan O'Brien? That you were with child when we went to.
7:32 Speaker 04 Norway and Thailand.
7:34 Conan O'Brien? Norway and Thailand.
7:35 Speaker 04 Yeah.
7:35 Conan O'Brien? And we didn't know, of course, you kept it a secret.
7:38 Speaker 04 Well, it was early days.
7:39 Conan O'Brien? You know that I have a policy. That no one's allowed to, uh, none of my writers.
7:44 Speaker 04 Like Rumpelstiltskin, you, you get the baby.
7:47 Conan O'Brien? None of my writers are allowed to reproduce. Uh, and it's a thing, when you, when you work with me, that you have to sign. Uh, and so you broke the rules and, uh, no, but so that was.
7:58 Speaker 04 It was during this track.
7:59 Conan O'Brien? That was interesting that Dot, who's now, how old, a year?
8:02 Speaker 04 She's a year and a half.
8:02 Conan O'Brien? Year and a half. Uh, Dot is, was with us on two trips. Which is really kinda cool.
8:09 Speaker 04 Oh, my God, that's right.
8:10 Conan O'Brien? She's been to Norway.
8:11 Speaker 04 I should have bring her on all of them.
8:13 Conan O'Brien? Well, actually, this means that, uh, she's in the union. She's in the guild. She's in the writers guild.
8:20 Speaker 04 Oh, my God.
8:21 Conan O'Brien? Yeah, and, uh.
8:23 Speaker 04 So now she's gonna bankrupt the show.
8:24 Conan O'Brien? She owes money.
8:27 Conan O'Brien? They're gonna done you.
8:28 Speaker 04 She's in her rears.
8:29 Conan O'Brien? Yes. So, um, uh, you, yes, you weren't allowed to go, you.
8:34 Speaker 04 Well, I was, I just hadn't quite figured out a way to be gone for, cause I knew the New Zealand show, that, that trip in particular was gonna be long. It's a really long flight.
8:42 Conan O'Brien? Yep.
8:42 Speaker 04 And the trip was like almost two weeks, I think.
8:45 Conan O'Brien? Yeah.
8:46 Speaker 04 That you guys were gone.
8:46 Conan O'Brien? Also, this was, you were newly, you know, you were still getting to know your daughter. And it was completely understandable that you were like, yeah, I don't, I don't think I'm ready to go on this trip.
8:57 Speaker 04 Yeah, and you guys were really, really cool about it, I have to say.
9:00 Conan O'Brien? Well, but, but then. But then. Immediately after that trip, um, you said, I so wanna get away from this child. Sign me up for the other show.
9:09 Speaker 04 Well, once I saw the dailies.
9:10 Speaker 03 It's amazing.
9:13 Speaker 05 The child did come with us.
9:14 Conan O'Brien? Yeah.
9:15 Speaker 05 But you stayed here.
9:17 Speaker 03 It's amazing, just weeks later, you were ready to go to Spain and meet Javier Bardem.
9:21 Conan O'Brien? Yeah, exactly.
9:22 Speaker 04 Somehow, I did pull it together for that one.
9:23 Conan O'Brien? You pulled it together for one of the most magnetic, sexy.
9:29 Speaker 03 Mommy, mommy, please, not now.
9:32 Conan O'Brien? Not now, don't.
9:32 Speaker 04 No, but I was gonna say that I was at home and I was, you know, keep keeping track of the trip, but that first day that you landed, I woke up and all over the news were these shots of Conan doing the Hakka, and it was just, it was perfect, because part of the Hakka is that you do these really grotesque war faces, and so the still that I kept seeing was you with your tongue out and your eyes engorged like a gargoyle.
10:00 Conan O'Brien? Yes, yes, of course, hips thrust forward.
10:04 Speaker 04 It was because I said engorged.
10:06 Conan O'Brien? Yes. Hips not engorged, devoid of any liquid.
10:11 Speaker 04 Hips deflated.
10:12 Conan O'Brien? But.
10:13 Speaker 03 That was our, yeah, the day we landed, which is probably the best time to learn the Hakka.
10:18 Conan O'Brien? It's called tearing off the bandage.
10:20 Speaker 03 Fifteen hour flight.
10:21 Speaker 05 Very quickly, we dove right into Maori culture and.
10:24 Conan O'Brien? Me at a stadium.
10:26 Speaker 05 Yes, exactly.
10:27 Conan O'Brien? And in front of all of New Zealand, and then we did, I don't want to give away any secrets, but let's just say we, it's worth watching that episode to see what's happening in the stadium, then we're making our way through the wilds of New Zealand.
10:44 Speaker 03 On the South Island.
10:45 Conan O'Brien? The North Island and the South Island are quite different. The South Island is the island where Peter Jackson filmed.
10:54 Speaker 03 Both islands.
10:54 Speaker 04 It was on both islands.
10:55 Conan O'Brien? He was on both islands, okay.
10:56 Speaker 03 But, but yes, some of the most dramatic.
10:59 Conan O'Brien? Yeah, when the hobbits are hanging out in karaoke bars.
11:03 Speaker 03 Right, right.
11:04 Conan O'Brien? And driving catamarans around a marina, that's the North Island. When the hobbits are going through Middle Earth, that's the South Island.
11:13 Speaker 03 Right, exactly.
11:13 Conan O'Brien? Yeah.
11:22 Conan O'Brien? You know, winning an award, that's a big achievement, right?
11:24 Speaker 06 Yeah, I love awards.
11:25 Conan O'Brien? Every now and then in life, maybe something nice like that comes your way. Winning them consistently is almost impossible. It just doesn't happen, you know? Well, guess what? Winning five times in six years? You know what that sounds like to me? Sustained excellence.
11:39 Speaker 06 Nice.
11:39 Conan O'Brien? Hyundai has done just that, earning the title of America's best SUV brand for 2026 from U.S. News and World Report. You are a very happy Hyundai driver.
11:48 Speaker 06 I drive a Hyundai Palisade and I love my car. I love it. I love driving it around.
11:52 Conan O'Brien? I've been tooling around in an Ioniq 5 N, which I love. Beautiful car. Listen, whether you need an SUV for everyday life, your next big adventure, or extra room for family and friends, Hyundai has an option for you. The Tucson Hybrid is loaded with technology and built for everyday life. The Santa Fe Hybrid's fully capable and ready for adventure. The Palisade, that's yours, right?
12:11 Speaker 06 Hello!
12:12 Conan O'Brien? They're gonna rename that the Sona. The Palisade Hybrid, yeah, delivers premium capability and class-leading interior space. With available, I had this memorized, H-Track all-wheel drive, up to an EPA-estimated 619 miles of range on vehicles like the Palisade Hybrid and Hyundai's industry-leading warranty. It's easy to see why Hyundai continues to deliver the quality, innovation, technology, and value drivers expect from an award-winning brand. View U.S. News Best Cars at cars.usnews.com and call 562-314-4603 for complete details.
12:46 Conan O'Brien? Who do you shop for first on the holidays, Sona? Was it, do you shop for the kids or do you shop for Tac?
12:50 Speaker 06 My kids.
12:51 Conan O'Brien? Okay, you gotta get them your stuff.
12:52 Speaker 06 Or my dog.
12:53 Conan O'Brien? And then your husband is last. Well, guess what? It's that time of year. You feel that, you smell that cinnamon cider in the air? Do you smell that?
13:03 Speaker 06 Yeah.
13:03 Conan O'Brien? And you see pumpkins around, people buying turkeys. A little early to buy a turkey. Doesn't matter. Holidays, I would say it's just around the corner, but that's a cliche. It's very nearby in the cupboard. Well, guess what? Amazon delivers joy with low prices on the gifts you want, even this early in the season. So get ahead of the season. Shop early gifts, top picks, holiday decor, and advent calendars at low prices. Get ahead, start on holiday gifting with Amazon's low prices. Shop now at amazon.com/holiday.
13:39 Conan O'Brien? This fall, I want to try something different.
13:41 Speaker 07 What?
13:42 Conan O'Brien? I like to change it up. I like to learn things. So I'm going to try and make apple cider.
13:45 Speaker 07 Ooh.
13:46 Conan O'Brien? Every morning.
13:47 Speaker 07 Okay.
13:47 Conan O'Brien? This fall, just to see if I can do it.
13:49 Speaker 07 Yeah.
13:49 Conan O'Brien? Yeah, fall is the perfect season to try something new, like joining T-Mobile.
13:53 Speaker 07 Oh, that's good.
13:54 Conan O'Brien? See what I did?
13:55 Speaker 07 Yeah.
13:55 Conan O'Brien? Yeah, there are 250 reasons to join T-Mobile right now. You want to hear what they are?
13:59 Speaker 07 Yeah.
13:59 Conan O'Brien? They're America's best network.
14:01 Speaker 07 Okay.
14:01 Conan O'Brien? True story. Plus, T-Mobile has got off-grid satellite coverage. That comes in really handy. I like to just wander in the woods sometimes.
14:08 Speaker 07 Oh, that's weird.
14:09 Conan O'Brien? When I'm thinking about, like, making apple cider.
14:11 Speaker 07 Oh.
14:11 Conan O'Brien? And that's when it comes in handy. Here's another reason. High-speed data in over 215 countries and destinations. I travel a lot for the
14:18 Speaker 07 You travel a lot.
14:19 Conan O'Brien? travel show that I do.
14:19 Speaker 07 Yeah.
14:20 Conan O'Brien? Stream this podcast while ignoring local landmarks. That's always fun to do. Like, oh, look, there's the Mona Lisa. Yeah, check it out. I'm in the Louvre. I should, but I'm listening to Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend.
14:30 Speaker 07 That doesn't seem like a good idea.
14:32 Conan O'Brien? It's a great idea.
14:33 Speaker 07 Okay.
14:33 Conan O'Brien? You know, you can see art anytime. But how often can you listen to this podcast?
14:38 Speaker 07 Oh, my god.
14:39 Conan O'Brien? Yeah.
14:40 Speaker 07 What?
14:40 Conan O'Brien? No, all these reasons make T-Mobile a great choice.
14:43 Speaker 07 I agree.
14:43 Conan O'Brien? T-Mobile is stacking up reasons to join. Go to T-Mobile.com and find yours best, based on analysis by UCLA of Speed Test Intelligence data first half of 2026. Can't believe I read that. T-Satellite with capable devices in most outdoor areas in the US, where you can see the sky. High-speed international data with qualifying plan. Visit T-Mobile.com, consult a physician. I just threw that in there.
15:08 Speaker 07 Oh.
15:12 Conan O'Brien? So, you have to admit, the holidays, it's really about hanging with the people you love.
15:18 Speaker 07 Yeah.
15:18 Conan O'Brien? And getting to be yourself. Not going to some stuffy holiday party where you need to conform to what the man wants you to think about the holidays.
15:27 Speaker 07 Yeah.
15:27 Conan O'Brien? Yeah, it's about being yourself. Turn your holiday time into Miller time by enjoying a Miller Lite in a place where you're free to enjoy yourself. On a walk with a cousin. With a cousin? Why are they getting all specific about?
15:38 Speaker 07 Because it's family.
15:39 Conan O'Brien? But what about a niece or a nephew?
15:41 Speaker 07 Yeah.
15:41 Conan O'Brien? Um, like a walk with an ex-wife. I don't know. I mean, they're just throwing... That's a weird... They just made a very specific choice.
15:50 Speaker 07 Yeah.
15:50 Conan O'Brien? Now's the time for those unexpected holiday side guests and enjoy a great tasting light beer. 'Tis Miller time, as Dickens wrote. Miller Lite is brewed for taste, the taste you can depend on. The original light beer since 1975 and still iconic more than 50 years later. I like to be with my bros, my chums, my posse, crack open a Miller Lite, take a swig, a sip, look around and see my friends. We've known each other forever and we're just hanging out.
16:17 Speaker 04 Yeah, you guys are just doing chest bumps and high fiving.
16:20 Conan O'Brien? Miller Lite is great taste done right. Go to millerlite.com/conan to find delivery options near you, or you can pick up some Miller Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer. Tis Miller time. Celebrate responsibly Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin. 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.
16:42 Conan O'Brien? Some of the distances we traveled to get, we had to go over this big mountain pass to get to... Hoki Teke. Hoki Teke, and that was quite a journey. Before we left the North Island, we did meet this young woman named Abby Howells, who was sort of getting me up to speed on, I wouldn't say customs, but pronunciations, how people...
17:05 Speaker 04 Attitudes.
17:06 Conan O'Brien? Attitudes, how slang. And she was, without a doubt, one of the funniest people I've met.
17:14 Speaker 04 Yeah.
17:14 Conan O'Brien? Her improv yes and was off the charts funny.
17:19 Speaker 04 You guys were doing like a two-person improv.
17:20 Conan O'Brien? Oh my God, I would tour, I would, I would do a two-person show with her in Vegas if I could. She's so funny and, and really delight, and really delightful.
17:29 Speaker 03 She should be an international star.
17:31 Speaker 04 I know, I think she will be.
17:33 Speaker 03 Which is not something I say about everyone.
17:35 Conan O'Brien? No, but she was amazing. She's kind of the breakout, I think, kind of the breakout star of the New Zealand episode, Abby Howells, and I just want to give a shout out to her because I'm hoping I cross paths with her again. She was so... Um, uniquely funny. She's just funny in her bones and uh, and, and just, uh, just so much fun. And I love the segments with her.
18:00 Speaker 04 Yeah.
18:00 Speaker 03 Yeah.
18:01 Conan O'Brien? We're at the ocean and again, this is one of the magical things about these travel shows is you guys do a great job of finding these people. I don't know who they're gonna be. I get out of a van. I walk up, they say, this is Abby. Hi Abby. And within two seconds, I'm thinking, she's hilarious. This is really fun. We did so much improv. It was really
18:22 Speaker 04 I know. Well, and I normally wouldn't, I think, I think someone telling me, just watch this half hour of improv would maybe turn me off a little bit, but it was legitimately so funny, watching the uncut version of it.
18:35 Conan O'Brien? Oh, the uncut. Yes. No, no, we wouldn't, we would never, we cut it down. We would never ask you to watch half an hour of improv. Jesse, how dare you suggest that's what happens?
18:43 Speaker 05 It was hard to edit as, because it was, because there were so many good chunks in there.
18:47 Speaker 03 And it all built as it went. So, and it just got funnier and funnier. And so then you're like, oh, how do we tighten this up without losing any of these great?
18:56 Conan O'Brien? I met the only other, I, I never meet anyone with a first name Conan, but you guys found someone in New Zealand whose name is Conan O'Brien. And I met with him. That was fun.
19:06 Speaker 03 That was.
19:06 Speaker 04 He was also really funny.
19:07 Conan O'Brien? He was funny. They are naturally very funny people and.
19:11 Speaker 03 That was our talent booker, Gina Batista, came in one day. She goes, I got an alert that there's a Conan O'Brien, or something on her phone. She goes, I don't know, that there's a Conan O'Brien in New Zealand.
19:21 Conan O'Brien? And he has one of my, he had my Amex, he had my Amex card. We figured out where the leak was.
19:28 Speaker 03 And he was, he was really funny too.
19:30 Speaker 05 Yeah, he's a councilman.
19:31 Conan O'Brien? You know, it's funny, there's something, um, we found this a lot. It's one of the things that I like so much about the travel shows is that you go to these other countries and they're, um, very self-possessed. They're like, oh yeah, okay. I know this, I've heard of this Conan guy. But anyway, and then they get on to just being themselves. And so the comedy is, it's a different.
19:54 Speaker 04 Yeah, they're not nervous around you.
19:56 Conan O'Brien? Oh God, no. No, there's a, there's a, there's a little scent of, I don't know, disdain?
20:04 Speaker 05 No, it's just being laid back. Abby mentioned that that's one of the sort of national pride of, of New Zealand is how.
20:11 Conan O'Brien? Laid back people can be.
20:13 Speaker 05 Yeah.
20:13 Speaker 03 They were all very unflappable.
20:15 Conan O'Brien? Yeah.
20:15 Speaker 03 And no matter, you know, just meeting someone in a, in a DVD store, guys just buying, renting videos and they're just like, hey Conan, and they knew who you were, but they're just like, yeah, and they're just kind of sleepy.
20:29 Conan O'Brien? You traveled 45,000 miles to be here, basically to the moon and back.
20:32 Speaker 03 Right, right.
20:33 Conan O'Brien? To go see them.
20:34 Speaker 03 Hey, that's cool.
20:35 Conan O'Brien? The, um, we go, then we go to the South Island and, uh, that was pretty fascinating just because the, um, the winding van ride up over the mountains.
20:49 Speaker 03 Yes.
20:50 Conan O'Brien? Uh, through fog, past, uh, just, I mean, that, yes, there's a, there's a part of this life of making remotes and there's no escaping it where if you're going to do this, you're going to be in a van for a long period of time.
21:07 Speaker 03 Yes.
21:08 Conan O'Brien? And some countries more than others and, uh, yeah, New Zealand is a van country.
21:13 Speaker 03 It is.
21:14 Conan O'Brien? You're in a van, yes.
21:15 Speaker 03 It's not luxury, uh, transport.
21:17 Conan O'Brien? And there's no way, I mean, if you want to get from, which city were we in, in the South Island?
21:23 Speaker 03 Christchurch.
21:24 Conan O'Brien? Christchurch. We were in Christchurch, then for us to get to Hokitika, which is on the other side of the island, south, and this is getting closer to Antarctica. That's the fascinating part. And I really wanted to go all the way south.
21:39 Speaker 03 Mm-hmm.
21:40 Conan O'Brien? And if we had been that kind of travel show that's actually trying to inform people, um, and, um, we would have, I, I would love to go back someday and go to the very southern tip because that's almost as close as you can get to Antarctica without getting on a boat.
21:56 Speaker 03 Other than Pat, like Patagonia.
21:57 Conan O'Brien? Patagonia, I think is a little closer.
21:59 Speaker 03 We look, and we looked into it and we were kind of like. Dunedin and down that way, there's wildlife and but you know, yes, it would be. A long van ride. Fan and it's it becomes a whole different show.
22:13 Speaker 05 Exactly.
22:14 Conan O'Brien? Um, this will not be in the special, but my hour, we finally get to Hokitika. And uh, what you will not see in the special is we check into this hotel. And I was taken up to this room that makes no sense. I've stayed in every kind of hotel room in my life. And this hotel room, there's, you take an elevator up two flights.
22:37 Speaker 03 To the third.
22:38 Conan O'Brien? To the third floor, and then you walk down and they say, just go through that door. And you go through that door and there's some more stairs. The stairs take you up to an elevator that is not functioning. It's not a functioning elevator and hasn't been for a long time. But then you like go up a ladder and there's another door. And then you're in a hotel room and there's an elevator door in that hotel room, but it doesn't open. And that's in the like, living room of the hotel room. It was just, I couldn't figure it out for the life of me. And then we.
23:10 Speaker 03 And they called it the penthouse suite.
23:11 Conan O'Brien? Yes, penthouse suite, but it's the kookiest thing I've ever seen. And then we uh, walked to a bar. And there was karaoke at the bar. And was it you, Jose, who played a cruel practical joke on me? Or was it?
23:32 Speaker 05 Oh, it was Chalemi. It was Jason Chalemi.
23:34 Conan O'Brien? Jason Chalemi called up a song and he said, you're next, Conan. And I went, I don't want to do it. And I said, no, no, you're next. And it was Led Zeppelin's.
23:42 Speaker 05 A whole lot of love.
23:43 Conan O'Brien? Whole lot of love, which if you know the song, you know, it's that, I mean, I don't, I don't know what the rules are. If I can sing, I can't really sing it, right?
23:51 Speaker 03 You can sing it. Oh.
23:55 Conan O'Brien? There's that part. But then there's.
23:58 Speaker 03 Led Zeppelin filed a claim for you.
23:59 Conan O'Brien? Yeah, not for that. I'll just say a cat got trapped in a grain fresher. Um, but then, as you know, in that song, there's a long break. Of just, and so everyone's looking at me, so I'm just gyrating in this tiny bar. And gyrating and gyrating and gyrating while various weird 1969 noises are playing. Whoop, whoop.
24:29 Conan O'Brien? And then finally to.
24:32 Conan O'Brien? And, and I was looking at Shalami and I was like, you fucker. And everyone's looking at me like, you need to make this interesting. Yes. But it's impossible. And then you finally get to the John Bonham.
24:46 Conan O'Brien? But again, that takes a while. It's the worst song to do karaoke to. Some should not be on that playlist. Yeah. And, and Jason Shalami, wherever you are, I'm not gonna fucking forget that. And I will pay you back in kind. Oh, he's the only one who could pull that off. That's so true. I have the whole thing on video. Uh, I will say also it's Jeff Ross's birthday. We celebrated Jeff Ross's birthday. That's right. In Hokage? That's right. That's why we did karaoke. Is that why we did it? That's right. It is Jeff's birthday. That's what Jeff asked for. Yes. And Jeff said, I want, um, I want a whole lot of love in a very small bar. And again, there were people in the bar, regular patrons, who just could have cared less about any of us.
25:28 Speaker 03 Yeah, they had no idea.
25:29 Conan O'Brien? There I am, yeah. This is a photo of Conan just sitting there as it says, musical break, 12 measures. Yes, 12 measures. And you know what I did? I sat down. I sat down and I, I look like when someone's about to be executed by a firing squad and they allow them to sit in a chair. Yes. I'm like Gary Gilmore, just sitting there, waiting for it to stop. Accepting your fate. Yeah. Uh, but anyway, um, we had, we, I meet a fan there who lives in very remote conditions and that's worth watching. Off the grid. Yes, yes. Uh, so that was, uh, fun. It was a very, again, none of these two shows are alike because these countries are all so different.
26:10 Conan O'Brien? And, um, I stress, there are a lot of travel shows out there. I promise you, you will learn nothing from my travel show. In fact, my travel show, as I've said this before, it robs you of any knowledge you may have had of that country. It is a protein that eats at the brain. Uh, but I think it's funny. I think, I like to think it's funny. I hope it's funny and.
26:34 Speaker 03 There's a couple of Easter eggs in it.
26:35 Conan O'Brien? Couple of Easter eggs? Oh, yes, that's right. Oh my God, I get to do another dramatic turn. A lot of people right now, if you like The Pit with Noah Wiley, if you like The Pit with Noah Wiley, watch my travel show on Max because let's just say New Zealand has their own version of The Pit, which is just as gripping and intense. And I get to act in it and you get to really see my acting chops.
27:06 Speaker 05 Exactly.
27:06 Conan O'Brien? And I think Noah Wiley should fear me. He should fear, because if he saw this, I think he would immediately.
27:14 Speaker 03 That's why they rushed The Pit on TV. It wasn't ready.
27:18 Conan O'Brien? It wasn't ready.
27:19 Speaker 03 And they caught wind you were on Shortland Street.
27:21 Conan O'Brien? Yeah, a lot of the basic sound editing hasn't been done on The Pit.
27:26 Speaker 03 The Pit was gonna cover a week at the hospital and they found out you were coming.
27:31 Conan O'Brien? They said Conan's doing Shortland Street in New Zealand and he blows Noah Wiley out of the water. So what they did is they just quickly made it a day. And instead of having all the script ready, they just, a lot of it is just people reading medications.
27:46 Conan O'Brien? And contraindications. And contraindications. A lot of diarrhea. Well, I want to thank you guys again and again a shout out that you're here with me. But Mike Sweeney, Jose Arroyo. Got the accent on there. Yeah, I thought that was important. And of course Jesse Gaskell and so glad that you guys, you guys work so hard to make these shows come out. And a shout out to the whole team. Blay, of course, you were there. Eduardo and Adam, you're in the studio, but you did nothing for these shows. Shalemi, shout out to you. Jeff Ross. I'm very lucky to have you guys and I'm gonna say that.
28:27 Conan O'Brien? And then I'm gonna quickly make a joke about you guys being awful and a load center around my neck. Or edit it out.
28:35 Speaker 05 Shout out to Bex, our fixer in New Zealand as well.
28:38 Conan O'Brien? Yeah, and to Bex's beer. Okay, and to Beck's be here, sure. Which I probably shouldn't do because it doesn't matter. No, but no. I'm a Miller Lite guy. We do have a sponsorship with the Fixer. Yeah, Miller Lite. Beck's is the one who found Abby Howell, so. Yes, exactly. That's great. This is the segment called Too Much Information.
28:54 Speaker 04 And our sheep.
28:55 Conan O'Brien? We'll call it the end credits. It's the end credits. The Hyundai Excel company for. They were amazing. Renting us a car. The Kia Bird. You were hilarious in many different ways on this New Zealand. Thank you. Well, listen, I'm a painter who uses many different colors. Yes, yes, yes. Which is my way of saying funny in different ways. Anyway, check it out. It's on Max. Two dimensional. There are two episodes now out. Last week was, of course. Spain. Spain. And this week is New Zealand. And you can tune in next week. We'll be doing a podcast about the third episode in the Conan O'Brien Must Go series, and we'll see you then.
29:37 Speaker 04 I'm hooked, I'm hooked.
29:40 Speaker 08 Conan O'Brien Needs a Fan with Conan O'Brien, Sonam of Sessian, and Matt Gourley. Produced by me, Matt Gourley. Executive produced by Adam Sacks, Jeff Ross, and Nick Liao. Incidental music by Jimmy Vivina. Take it away, Jimmy.
29:57 Speaker 08 Supervising producer Aaron Blaird, associate talent producer Jennifer Samples, associate producers Sean Dougherty and Lisa Bern, engineering by Eduardo Perez. Get three free months of SiriusXM when you sign up at siriusxm.com/conan. Please rate, review, and subscribe to Conan O'Brien Needs a Fan wherever fine podcasts are down.
30:28 Conan O'Brien? When you hear Alka Seltzer, you probably think heartburn, right? Yep. Well, did you know Alka Seltzer has a line of cold and flu medications known as Alka Seltzer Cold? Did you know that, David? No, but I feel like we need it. Why didn't you know that, David? I know. You expect me to know everything. I knew this because I. Did you? Yeah, I've tried it. It's really good. And I like that fizzy, fizzy, fizzy when you drop the Alka Seltzer Cold into the water. Yeah. Alka-Seltzer Cold Fast Dissolves tablets are designed to deliver cold and flu relief fast. Just drop the two tablets in water and hear those bubbles bursting into action, ready to work faster than pills. Bubbles faster than pills. Pills take time to dissolve, not bubbles. Next time a cold or flu strikes, quick! Alka-Seltzer Cold. Nothing works faster
31:11 Conan O'Brien? for cold and flu symptom relief. Among oral products, use as directed.
31:16 Speaker 09 Your sausage McMuffin with egg didn't change, your receipt did. The sausage McMuffin with egg extra value meal includes a hash brown and a small coffee for just $5. Only at McDonald's for a limited time.
31:28 Conan O'Brien? Price and participation may vary. Promotion pricing may be lower than meal pricing.
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