"RE-RELEASE: Liam Neeson”

Avid fly fisherman Liam Neeson brings his very particular set of skills (and his Stanley thermos) to the show this week. To Sean’s dismay, we don’t talk about Star Wars. However, of his over 100 film roles, we discuss Alfred Kinsey, Oskar Schindler… and Jesus. And the time he made Jason’s mom cry for a week. This episode was originally released on 5/2/2022.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:01Sean Hayes?

  This episode of Smartless is sponsored by Google Book. You know, I'm lucky to have a lot of friends and having them over is great, but with hosting comes all the tedious stuff. The planning, keeping track of who's coming, managing schedules, making sure everything actually comes together. That's where Google Book comes in. It's a whole new kind of laptop. It comes with Google AI Pro, so you can create custom tasks with Gemini. For example, you can tell it to track RSVPs and manage your calendar, and it does that for you, even when the laptop's closed. So there's more time to focus on the fun parts of hosting. Basically, Google Book works hard, so you don't have to. Visit googlebook.com. Available in the Gemini app to Google AI Pro users

• 0:45Sean Hayes?

  in select regions for 18-plus users. Check responses for accuracy. Supervise closely. Interrupt when needed.

• 0:54Jason Bateman?

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• 1:34Sean Hayes?

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• 2:10Sean Hayes?

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• 2:55Will Arnett?

  Welcome.

• 2:56Speaker 03

  Welcome.

• 2:57Will Arnett?

  Welcome.

• 2:57Jason Bateman?

  Welcome. Welcome.

• 3:00Will Arnett?

  Welcome to...

• 3:01Jason Bateman?

  Welcome to Smartless. Smart. Less.

• 3:14Will Arnett?

  Smart. Less.

• 3:20Will Arnett?

  Smart. Less.

• 3:25Will Arnett?

  I feel like I want to get into talking to you guys. I really do. I miss you. Sean, I owe you a call. I know that you FaceTimed me the other night and I never called you back. And I'm just realizing that now.

• 3:34Sean Hayes?

  That's okay.

• 3:35Will Arnett?

  And I miss you desperately.

• 3:36Sean Hayes?

  I miss you guys too.

• 3:37Will Arnett?

  And are you okay in Chicago?

• 3:39Sean Hayes?

  Oh, William, thank you. Yes, I'm okay. I mean, other than the sirens going off every single, every fucking night. And the guy across the hall from us has a dog. They leave the door open and it barks so loud, it sounds like it's in our apartment. And then it gets all the dogs down the whole, the whole hallway going. Every dog starts barking.

• 3:59Jason Bateman?

  Have you talked to him about it? Or given him a hairy eyeball in the elevator at least?

• 4:04Sean Hayes?

  No, I don't. What are you guys about masks? Like, people in this building...

• 4:08Will Arnett?

  Run dogs?

• 4:11Jason Bateman?

  They are carriers.

• 4:12Sean Hayes?

  No, like, like, some people in the building don't wear masks anymore. And some people are like, oh, the mandate's over, so.

• 4:18Will Arnett?

  I would like to do it based on how they look, like, ooh, you need a mask. You know what I mean?

• 4:25Sean Hayes?

  But, uh, what else? I always forget to bring a meal to rehearsal, too, so I'm kind of hungry all the time. We only get 20-minute breaks. So if I run home, isn't this an amazing story? If I run home.

• 4:36Jason Bateman?

  Maybe the soldiers in Ukraine would like to hear about your 20-minute breaks.

• 4:39Will Arnett?

  Yeah, maybe they want to talk about your tech rehearsal.

• 4:41Jason Bateman?

  Snacks aren't great.

• 4:43Will Arnett?

  Wait, yeah, are you gonna start complaining about your blocking next?

• 4:46Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 4:46Sean Hayes?

  Yes, oh, thank you for bringing that up.

• 4:48Will Arnett?

  Wait, take it up with the director. We don't want to hear about the blocking on your play.

• 4:52Sean Hayes?

  No, so I have 20 minutes, I don't know what to, I never have, it's, anyway, I'm always hungry.

• 4:56Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 4:57Will Arnett?

  Yeah, Jason?

• 4:59Jason Bateman?

  I don't have any complaints, I just feel for my fellow citizens around the world.

• 5:04Sean Hayes?

  Likewise.

• 5:04Will Arnett?

  Sean, you would have loved it last night, I had Jason's wife, Amanda, here at the house, and his daughter, Maple.

• 5:10Sean Hayes?

  But no, Jason?

• 5:11Will Arnett?

  To have dinner with my fo, not Jason, no.

• 5:12Jason Bateman?

  No, because, you know, because today's Saturday, yesterday was a workday. So you're starting dinner at 5 o'clock, that means I still got 2 hours of work left.

• 5:21Will Arnett?

  But wait, what a joke, says this, says the guy who, since January 1st, has played 34 days of golf, and none of them on the weekend, by the way, because he's not allowed to play on the weekend.

• 5:31Jason Bateman?

  Because that's family time.

• 5:32Will Arnett?

  So let's talk about workdays.

• 5:33Sean Hayes?

  Wait, isn't that a new, is that a new rule?

• 5:35Jason Bateman?

  It is a new rule, and I feel good about it. And I'm also, a new rule is, uh, this is also something our citizens in strife around the world.

• 5:44Will Arnett?

  Does it have to do with your Tesla? Go ahead.

• 5:47Jason Bateman?

  No, it's, I'm, I'm going to not play every day, okay?

• 5:53Will Arnett?

  Oh, wow. You know the term hero gets used a lot, but I mean, in this case.

• 5:59Jason Bateman?

  Listen, we actors are, you know, it's not, we're not, it's, it's easy, okay? And people that say, oh, it's so hard, and the hours are so, it's just, please, we're so lucky to be doing what we're doing.

• 6:12Sean Hayes?

  When I run lines with Scotty, just to memorize lines, run lines, Tracy is like, you run lines, like you memorize lines. And he, I have such a short temper with him, and it's, has nothing to do with him, but I'm like, okay, so I come in and I say, oh, relax, okay, then I say, yeah, but it's only 4 lousy hours, what can go wrong? And he says, no, it's, and I go, go back, go back to the previous line, I can't believe.

• 6:35Jason Bateman?

  Does he correct you on every word, every syllable?

• 6:39Sean Hayes?

  Yeah.

• 6:40Will Arnett?

  And does he come to rehearsal and sit out in the audience? And does he, do you go line and Scotty's there?

• 6:46Sean Hayes?

  No, for the actual performances.

• 6:47Will Arnett?

  During the performances?

• 6:49Jason Bateman?

  Can he maybe have like a fanny pack that's got snacks in it or something for you?

• 6:53Sean Hayes?

  I know.

• 6:53Will Arnett?

  That's a good idea.

• 6:54Sean Hayes?

  Scotty, can you make me a fanny pack with snacks, a pack snack, a snack?

• 6:57Will Arnett?

  You know, it's almost like he's walking you, like he's a dog walker, but for you. And he's got a fanny pack and he could have some wipes and stuff.

• 7:03Jason Bateman?

  It's a snacky pack.

• 7:05Sean Hayes?

  Wipes?

• 7:05Jason Bateman?

  Scotty with a snacky pack.

• 7:07Will Arnett?

  We tried to buy Sean that toilet too, and then it wouldn't work, right?

• 7:10Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 7:11Will Arnett?

  What, Jason and I wanted to buy you a fancy toilet.

• 7:13Jason Bateman?

  I know, that was so nice. Listener, so when we were on the tour, you learn a lot about someone when you're living with them. And, and sweet, sweet Sean, as privileged as he sounds with this past five minutes, he was completely unaware that the, the toilets with the washlet has snuck up on him. And he'd never heard of it before. You know, the, the, those Toto toilets that like

• 7:36Will Arnett?

  Most people don't know.

• 7:37Jason Bateman?

  Shoot a geyser in you and, well, no, I mean, people know about them. Not a lot of people have them, but I mean, it's like, it's this bizarre new technology in.

• 7:47Sean Hayes?

  It's a bidet built into the bath.

• 7:49Will Arnett?

  Yeah, so we tried to buy, Jason and I tried to, after learning of, Sean didn't know.

• 7:53Jason Bateman?

  For his birthday.

• 7:54Sean Hayes?

  I came out of the bathroom, I was like in awe, I was like, oh my God, there's these switches that can clean your ass. And then it blow dries your ass.

• 8:00Jason Bateman?

  We were staying in a hotel that had one and he couldn't believe it. And we're like, come on, you'd never, so we know that he, while he's away in Chicago, he's doing some remodeling in the, in the castle there in LA. And so we tried to arrange with his husband to get a new toy toy put in there. And it ended up being more expensive than the toilet itself. Toy toy.

• 8:18Sean Hayes?

  You had to tear down the wall and to go in the pipes and everything. But it's the thought that counts and you guys are so sweet to think of that. And I was gonna get you guys Porsches, but it just didn't work out.

• 8:27Will Arnett?

  Well, there's still time, there's still time.

• 8:29Jason Bateman?

  Maybe try again.

• 8:30Sean Hayes?

  It's the thought, it's the thought.

• 8:31Will Arnett?

  Speaking of it's still time, we're running out of time because we have a great guest here who has been really biding his time waiting and, and being so gracious.

• 8:39Sean Hayes?

  Sorry, that's my fault.

• 8:40Will Arnett?

  And, and he, this is somebody who can relate to actor problems because this is a person who's been acting at a high level for longer than the three of us have ever, you know, even known what the hell was going on in the world. This is somebody who started on the stage to great acclaim, moved into films, has made.

• 9:00Will Arnett?

  Countless films over the year at the highest level.

• 9:03Jason Bateman?

  Dick Van Dyke.

• 9:05Will Arnett?

  Not Dick Van Dyke. Not only that, he and I have starred together, as it turns out, in three pictures together. Which does, only brings him down and props me up. And makes me look good. He's somebody that I've just admired for so long because he's such an incredible actor. And he's the star of The Nut Job, The Nut Job 2, The Lego Movie, also perhaps Schindler's List, The Taken movies.

• 9:31Jason Bateman?

  Oh, good lord.

• 9:33Will Arnett?

  He's got a new film coming out, Memory. You guys, it's Mr. Liam Neeson.

• 9:37Jason Bateman?

  Liam Neeson, no way! Right there.

• 9:42Speaker 04

  Hi Sean.

• 9:43Jason Bateman?

  Wow, good morning.

• 9:44Will Arnett?

  Look at this.

• 9:45Speaker 04

  I did love listening to yous. I did love listening to yous, I swear.

• 9:49Jason Bateman?

  Sorry about that.

• 9:51Speaker 04

  Jason, you play golf. I have to tell you, I'm...

• 9:54Jason Bateman?

  Only because I'm trying to, I'm trying to understand how the common man lives his life.

• 9:59Will Arnett?

  He's sorry for you, he said. Did you hear that? He said that he already feels pity for you, Jason.

• 10:03Jason Bateman?

  I know, I'm embarrassed. But I do it, I do it for the mental anguish of it. To me, it's work. It's very hard to do.

• 10:10Speaker 04

  Yeah, very believable, Jason.

• 10:11Jason Bateman?

  Anyway, I still don't think...

• 10:13Speaker 04

  As George Bernard Shaw once said, "It's a good walk ruined."

• 10:16Will Arnett?

  That's right.

• 10:17Jason Bateman?

  It's true. That's part of the job, trying to stay positive.

• 10:20Will Arnett?

  We've had our first George Bernard Shaw quote. You have already classed us up a million percent, Liam. Thank you so much for being here, man. It's such an incredible honor.

• 10:30Speaker 04

  I'm very honored myself, and I'm very, very fucking nervous.

• 10:34Will Arnett?

  Don't be. Liam, let me start by this, because this is an area that Sean loves the most, which is our stories from the theater. And you have a long history of performing in the theater for many years. So Sean, I'm gonna give you the opportunity to, right off the bat, ask Liam a theater question, your most prized theater question.

• 10:53Jason Bateman?

  Well, now I'm put on the spot. First of all, I can't believe I'm talking to you.

• 10:55Will Arnett?

  I know.

• 10:56Jason Bateman?

  Like, I've never met you. This is so awesome, this is so cool. And I'm nervous a little bit.

• 11:00Speaker 04

  Are me, you, Sean?

• 11:01Jason Bateman?

  So, my question to you is, what is your favorite tragic theater story? I've said, I've said so many of mine on here. I'm trying to think of another.

• 11:10Sean Hayes?

  Well, I can tell you another one. Kristen, I did a play with Kristen Chenoweth years ago. The listeners are so sick of me talking about. And at the end of the show, we come up for our bows. And I look over from opposite wings. And Kristen and I are supposed to come from opposite sides of the stage, meet in the middle, walk down the center and take our bow together.

• 11:28Jason Bateman?

  Complicated.

• 11:28Sean Hayes?

  And I.

• 11:31Jason Bateman?

  Never seen that before. So these are the curtain calls, huh?

• 11:36Will Arnett?

  Yeah, walk us through it.

• 11:37Jason Bateman?

  The bows, right? Okay. Did you bump into each other?

• 11:43Jason Bateman?

  How do you avoid that?

• 11:44Will Arnett?

  What were your two characters' names? Promises and Promises, right? Are those the two characters?

• 11:50Jason Bateman?

  Keep going, Sean. We're classy guests.

• 11:53Sean Hayes?

  So Kristen. So I look over and Kristen's not there. And I'm like, oh, my God, everybody's clapping, waiting for us to come out. I'm like, where's Kristen? And I look over and she's dead, passed out.

• 12:06Sean Hayes?

  On the floor, passed out on the floor. And I'm like, what the hell happened to Kristen Chenoweth? And so I'm like, stage manager, I'm like, do I go out? Do I wait for her? What's happening? They're trying to revive her, get her back up. So I went out and took my bow by myself.

• 12:19Will Arnett?

  You're thinking, wow, I'm getting doubled the applause today.

• 12:24Sean Hayes?

  So then, so then she.

• 12:25Speaker 04

  What happened to her?

• 12:26Sean Hayes?

  She passed out because she didn't eat that day. So they gave her a candy bar and she like came back to. She did a whole show and then passed out at the end.

• 12:35Speaker 04

  Oh, my gosh.

• 12:36Sean Hayes?

  When is the last time you did a live theater show?

• 12:42Speaker 04

  Oh, my God. 14 years ago, I did a little Samuel Beckett piece called A Joe. It lasts about 25 minutes. I don't say a word. That's one of the reasons I took the job.

• 13:02Speaker 04

  And Ray Fiennes was, it was an evening of Beckett pieces at Lincoln Center. That was the last time.

• 13:11Sean Hayes?

  And do you want to do it again? Or you're like, I'm good.

• 13:13Speaker 04

  The muse has gone from me. It's left me completely.

• 13:17Sean Hayes?

  Really?

• 13:18Speaker 04

  Yeah. And it's, I don't, I used to worry about it because I started off in the theater for four years. Just nothing but theater. And did the odd play and the crucible and it's Beckett piece and then.

• 13:33Speaker 04

  About three, four years ago, it just, the muse just left me. I was offered some stuff and it's just, I love seeing my friends do it. I love.

• 13:41Jason Bateman?

  You're talking about the muse for theater?

• 13:43Speaker 04

  Muse for theater, yes, Jason, yeah.

• 13:45Jason Bateman?

  But, but, you know, I hear people say that about theater because the, the, the schedule is really, really challenging. But the movies you are doing.

• 13:54Will Arnett?

  Are so demanding.

• 13:55Jason Bateman?

  You cannot ask for a harder genre for you to do and you do it. But you, I could understand maybe one out of every five films, you're out there doing all the, all the action stuff. But my God, the, the amount of stamina that you must have and work ethic you have, discipline that you have, and, and the, the shape you must be in, it's so incredibly admirable.

• 14:18Speaker 04

  Well, thank you, Jason.

• 14:19Jason Bateman?

  You know, a nice little, a nice little three act drama down, down the street. I mean, come on, you, you need, you need a break.

• 14:28Speaker 04

  Yeah, I.

• 14:31Jason Bateman?

  Well, maybe some little farce comedy, you know, some, some sort of French farce, you know?

• 14:35Speaker 04

  Noises on.

• 14:36Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, a bunch of doors slamming, a bunch of grab ass.

• 14:39Speaker 04

  Yeah, that stuff, that stuff's hard to do, you know?

• 14:42Jason Bateman?

  It is to it.

• 14:42Speaker 04

  Timing wise.

• 14:44Jason Bateman?

  Or get yourself a podcast, Liam.

• 14:46Speaker 04

  Oh, God.

• 14:47Jason Bateman?

  Come on, look how cozy this is.

• 14:50Will Arnett?

  Liam, I'm gonna tell you something. I'm 51, almost 52, and I.

• 14:53Jason Bateman?

  He plays 36.

• 14:54Speaker 04

  Let's not talk about age.

• 14:56Will Arnett?

  Well, we won't talk about age, but I'll tell you this. I read a script the other day. They said, um, take a look at this. They send you, they're interested. And I read it and the first scene said exterior night and I said, I'm not interested.

• 15:09Will Arnett?

  That's a true story.

• 15:11Jason Bateman?

  Liam doesn't care about that.

• 15:12Will Arnett?

  Yeah, I mean, it does take a lot, those films you do.

• 15:15Speaker 04

  Look, we've all done it. We, you know, it's, it's, um, it takes a village, right? Yeah. I have a little routine when I'm doing mine. I get up, I, I exercise for 30, 35 minutes maximum.

• 15:29Jason Bateman?

  That's it.

• 15:30Speaker 04

  No more than that. And, uh, you know, when you're doing the junkets and stuff, say, oh, you do your own stunts. And I always, I always say to them, please listen to me. I do not do my own stunts. I don't do that at all. I do my own fighting. That I like to do. But stunts, no, you know, jumping out of windows.

• 15:50Jason Bateman?

  Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Wait, wait, wait. So you're doing your own fighting? Yeah, the fighting's no bargain. That's not simple.

• 15:57Speaker 04

  Yeah, but it's like learning a dance, Jason. You must have done stuff.

• 16:01Jason Bateman?

  I did. Actually, the last big fight I did was with Will Arnett on Arrested Development. It was supposed to be funny because it lasted so long. You know, two idiots that don't really know how to fight. They just end up on the floor wrestling and they kept cutting back to the scene and we're still. So we had to shoot it over the course of like, I don't know, it was like a 15 minute. It literally put me in the hospital. We had to shut down for a few weeks because I was so exhausted. And this was, this was 20 years ago. I'm a lot to handle. You'd say that. You're a lot. You got a real back on you. Sure.

• 16:35Speaker 04

  You play golf every day?

• 16:37Jason Bateman?

  Now, I only play nine holes a day. I can't walk 18. No, that's not true.

• 16:42Sean Hayes?

  But Jay, I asked you about that last, the last episode of the latest Ozark chunk.

• 16:48Jason Bateman?

  Yes.

• 16:49Sean Hayes?

  Where the guy comes in and beats the crap out of you. I'm like, was that you? And you're like, no, are you fucking kidding me?

• 16:54Jason Bateman?

  No, I, for a while there, I kind of thought, oh, no, I'm gonna, if there's some kind of a stunt, I want to do it. It'd be kind of, and then, and then a stunt coordinator took me aside one day and he said, "Hey, guy, I know you're trying to do the right thing for camera and everything by having it be your face, but you know you're taking money out of this guy's pocket over here who's just standing on the set, ready to double you." And he gets paid for every take. So if you just sit there and try to be a hero, this guy's trying to make a living too. And I was like, oh. So I learned that lesson early on. Liam, I'm sure you learned it way before.

• 17:27Speaker 04

  And it's gonna make you look good.

• 17:29Jason Bateman?

  Exactly. Yeah, it's gonna make you look good. Yeah, on top of it all. Yeah. So when Will kind of said that you guys on Nut Jobs up, you've got to look for some of those jobs sometimes that are nice and cushy, maybe just with a microphone, preferably like an animated film. But even if it's on camera, maybe some sort of nice domestic, you know, dramedy or something?

• 17:54Speaker 04

  Yeah, but I don't get to kill people, you know?

• 17:58Jason Bateman?

  You can have a dream sequence right in the middle of like a Thanksgiving dinner, you know?

• 18:04Sean Hayes?

  Liam, wait, you touched on something I wanted to ask you about, which was, you know, obviously you've done tons and tons of such phenomenal work in your life and your career. And, you know, one of the biggest ones out of all of them was, of course, Schindler's List. And with Ralph Fiennes. And then here I am, years and years later, watching Clash of the Titans. And it wasn't until the end of the movie, I was like, oh, wait, those two were in Schindler's List too. Like, that's how great you are. Completely forgot that you both were in another movie together. And so do you have a relationship with Ralph? Like, did you know him? Did you build a friendship?

• 18:39Speaker 04

  No, no, Ralph's a really, really good friend. But I remember when we shot that, that was the first, we did two, Clash of the Titans and Wrath of the Titans, was it? And the first one was, that was nearly 13 years ago. But when Ralph comes on, he's playing Hades, you know, the god of hell. And I'm Zeus, the god of gods. He comes and he's my brother. I couldn't do the scene, I couldn't look him straight in the eyes. I had to keep looking at his forehead.

• 19:10Sean Hayes?

  Why? Why are you making me laugh?

• 19:11Speaker 04

  Why? Because he kept cracking you up? Well, we just, you know, we're dressed in wigs and beards and all this stuff. And it's like, it's like, oh, come on.

• 19:19Sean Hayes?

  It was so good.

• 19:20Speaker 04

  I couldn't do the scene with him. I just had to keep looking at his forehead.

• 19:24Will Arnett?

  There are people that you have that kind of relationship with, where you have that kind of chemistry, that they just make you laugh. And when I was doing Arrested, it was Tony Hale who played Buster. And we would often come into a scene together. And so we'd be on our start mark, and we would, the ADB looking at us about to give us our cue. And like, right as you could hear the dialogue, we're about to get the cue, Tony would immediately kind of go into his character of Buster. All of a sudden, he'd be standing there, and then all of a sudden, he'd go, like this, get ready. And as soon as he did that, I couldn't, I couldn't stop laughing. And so I'd come into scenes laughing already. Because I've just corpsed offstage, you know what I mean?

• 20:03Jason Bateman?

  Now, speaking of people that are unprofessional and can't keep it together, Laura Linney, your friend. Boy, we finally got through that show. How have you managed to stay friends with somebody that undisciplined and untalented for so many years?

• 20:17Speaker 04

  I know, I know. Come here. So when am I gonna see series three, part two? I've seen part one. I've seen, I love the show, by the way.

• 20:27Jason Bateman?

  This is Ozark, yeah. Ozark.

• 20:30Speaker 04

  Ozark.

• 20:31Jason Bateman?

  Thank you, yes. No, it's coming the end of April.

• 20:36Speaker 04

  End of April.

• 20:36Jason Bateman?

  I'm not sure when this is going to air, but probably right about now.

• 20:41Jason Bateman?

  And that Laura, my goodness, is she good.

• 20:44Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 20:44Jason Bateman?

  She's, you guys have been friends for many, many, many years, right?

• 20:48Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah.

• 20:50Jason Bateman?

  And she, she's got so many great stories about you, and I'll bet you of her, but, you know, it's just, sorry, listener, for just a second. The listener can relate to this. Anybody in any working experience, work environment, if you love the people that you work with, you don't spend a minute working, ever. And she was just so incredible in sort of washing the whole set with her good vibes and positivity and warmth and... Do you think she'd say the same about you? No, no, no, no, no. Between the two of us, we had, we got to something right in the middle. You guys worked together originally, is that how you met?

• 21:32Speaker 04

  Yeah, I'm trying to think.

• 21:34Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, am I, am I totally forgetting a big thing you guys did together? Or was it just a social?

• 21:39Speaker 04

  No, we did The Crucible on Broadway. And then we did a film called Kinsey.

• 21:45Jason Bateman?

  Yes.

• 21:47Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, absolutely.

• 21:47Speaker 04

  And Laura was my wife in that. And then we did another film with Antonio Banderas. She was having an affair with him. We were married.

• 21:56Jason Bateman?

  She cheated on me in Ozark, too. You're still, I love that Liam is still angry about it.

• 22:02Jason Bateman?

  It's just a movie.

• 22:04Speaker 04

  Especially Antonio Banderas is so ugly. I was like, come on.

• 22:07Will Arnett?

  It's the hallmark of it. I don't want to embarrass you, Liam, but it's a hallmark of a great, of a great movie star that you barely remember how many movies you've done or what they are. And for us, like, as, as sort of like fans, we're like, this is so exciting to have somebody who.

• 22:21Speaker 04

  Well, do you know something? I'm not, I'm not blowing smoke up my ass here. Just prior to Christmas passed, I finished my 100th film.

• 22:32Jason Bateman?

  No way.

• 22:33Speaker 04

  Wow.

• 22:33Jason Bateman?

  Wow. That's crazy.

• 22:35Speaker 04

  I couldn't believe it. I mean, Tony Hopkins used to say anytime we see each other, give each other a hug. And I say, how's it going, Tony? And he says, ah, great. He says, I haven't been phoned out yet. I feel the exact same.

• 22:48Jason Bateman?

  But Liam, I'm not great at math here, but if you did four movies a year for 25 years in a row, that would give you 100 films. So, I mean, to do, listener, you know, doing a film as an actor is a three month, so if you did four, I mean, that's, that's working 12 months a year, every year for 25 years.

• 23:10Speaker 04

  Not really. Yeah. I mean, I started, my first little film was 1977 season.

• 23:17Jason Bateman?

  Yeah. So little, little parts count, obviously.

• 23:21Will Arnett?

  Was that in Ireland or was, were you living in England by the, when you did your first film? I wanted to get into this.

• 23:26Speaker 04

  I was actually living in Belfast. I was in the theater. There were bombs and armored cars going, it was just like.

• 23:38Speaker 04

  You know, it's, it's a bit, it was a bit like Ukraine, I can imagine at the minute.

• 23:46Speaker 04

  And we were in, I was in this theater called the Lyric Players Theater and we, we played six nights a week during the height of the troubles. That theater never closed. Couple of times there were bomb scares where soldiers would come in, we'd have to go out onto the street with the audience. Okay, all clear. Go back in again.

• 24:07Will Arnett?

  And go back and do the show. What is that experience like? Because, you know, for us, obviously, you know, we're such pampered, you know, guys who have not have to experience anything like that, but for.

• 24:21Will Arnett?

  To do a play in an environment like that, it must feel so far apart. Does it even feel like show business? Or does it feel like you're... What is your mindset doing a play day in and day out with real threat just outside the doors?

• 24:39Speaker 04

  Well, my mindset was I was just so thrilled to be acting.

• 24:46Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 24:47Speaker 04

  And getting paid for it.

• 24:49Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 24:49Speaker 04

  It was literally as simple as that. You know, I was 24 when I turned professional and still pretty much a kid. You know, all this shit was happening out in the streets and stuff. But I don't know. You just, I felt I was in a bubble, my own bubble of joy.

• 25:11Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 25:12Speaker 04

  Doing these plays. We did a play, we did a different play every four weeks, you know?

• 25:15Will Arnett?

  Wow.

• 25:17Speaker 04

  We'll be right back.

• 25:19Sean Hayes?

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• 26:02Sean Hayes?

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• 26:25Sean Hayes?

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• 27:08Jason Bateman?

  This episode of Smartless is brought to you in part by SkinnyPop popcorn. So, I think one of the great journeys in life is finding the snack that's right for you. You know, and it's constantly changing, but what is constant is the love of popcorn I think that we all have. So, finding a snack that tastes great and feels like a solid choice should not be more complicated than solving a 1,000-piece jigsaw puzzle. SkinnyPop popcorn, made with simple quality ingredients, always satisfies. No overthinking required. No jigsaw puzzle assembly required. It's a no-brainer.

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• 28:37Jason Bateman?

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• 29:18Jason Bateman?

  And now, back to the show. So there at 24, who was the Liam Neeson for you at 24? Who were you looking at and going, my God, if I could have a career that lasts that long and hold that amount of relevance that long and be at the top of my game at that age now that I'm 24, I hope to be that age and doing that. Who was that North Star for you at that point?

• 29:43Speaker 04

  God, that's a good question. Certainly my ambition then would have been, I mean, it wasn't, I never thought of movies at all.

• 29:52Jason Bateman?

  Really?

• 29:53Speaker 04

  Unattainable for some reason. But I thought, oh, wouldn't it be great to be in Britain's National Theatre?

• 29:59Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 30:00Speaker 04

  As a regular player, you know? That was about the height of it.

• 30:04Jason Bateman?

  Who was the big shot in the National Theatre at that point? Was it, does it go back too far to say John Gielgud?

• 30:10Speaker 04

  Oh, Maggie Smith, Judi Dench.

• 30:13Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 30:14Speaker 04

  Robert Stephens, Colin Blakely, who was my hero. He was from the north of Ireland too. But it was, yeah, it was that. It was based on theatre and I did a little.

• 30:24Jason Bateman?

  Was Albert Finney doing work in the National Theatre at that point?

• 30:28Speaker 04

  No, not, he, 1976, he did A Hamlet.

• 30:32Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 30:33Speaker 04

  Which was very, very good, which I saw.

• 30:35Jason Bateman?

  I'll bet. My God.

• 30:37Speaker 04

  Yeah, it just seems, uh... I've just been so lucky, Jason, and I genuinely mean that. It's just been.

• 30:42Will Arnett?

  But you're doing theater and you say, and I'm glad Jason brought that up, that and you said that you never had any ambition to do movies that felt like just probably so far away from where you were at that time.

• 30:55Speaker 04

  Sure, yeah.

• 30:56Will Arnett?

  But then you do a film in Belfast, your first film, and then the first time you're on a movie set, do you think like, yeah, I could see this seems about right? And like, did it feel comfortable?

• 31:08Speaker 04

  No, I didn't have that. The first movie was for an evangelical outreach. We were making a film in Belfast, believe it or not, of Pilgrim's Progress.

• 31:20Will Arnett?

  Wow.

• 31:21Speaker 04

  John Bunyan's Pilgrim's Progress. Apparently, the little film is still touring Africa and stuff, you know, to get converts and stuff.

• 31:28Will Arnett?

  Oh, wow. Wow.

• 31:30Speaker 04

  Evangelical religion. And I remember there's a place called Cave Hill that sort of overlooks the city of Belfast, and I was playing Jesus Christ.

• 31:44Will Arnett?

  Sure.

• 31:45Speaker 04

  And I'm actually, I'm crucified, so I was on a cross with a fake crown of thorns and stuff in my hands with, you know, makeup, you know, false nails stuck in them and stuff. And I remember thinking, why are they not rolling the camera? Why are they not saying action and stuff? And they were all, the team of the evangelical people, they were all praying. Oh, wow. I was standing there and I was like, my arms were getting so shaky. And I'm looking down on Belfast and I'm seeing armored cars going up and down and sirens going and stuff and saying, this is fucking crazy. But I love it.

• 32:26Will Arnett?

  Yearning for a nice little one act.

• 32:29Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 32:30Will Arnett?

  And you're thinking, you're thinking, I finally made it.

• 32:34Speaker 04

  Yeah. Yes.

• 32:37Jason Bateman?

  That's so funny.

• 32:39Will Arnett?

  So you, but you, so then you moved to England and you start, and you start your film career in England, really in earnest at that point, yeah, I mean, that was.

• 32:47Speaker 04

  No, I, I moved down to Dublin.

• 32:50Will Arnett?

  Okay.

• 32:50Speaker 04

  And was fortunate enough to do a couple of plays there. And then I joined the Abbey Theatre, which was Ireland, is Ireland's National Theatre, I guess. I was there for a while and I did a production of Steinbeck's Of Myson Man. And John Borman, the film director, he lives in Ireland, he came to see it. And he was putting together this film Excalibur.

• 33:14Will Arnett?

  Oh, yeah.

• 33:15Speaker 04

  About Arthurian legends. And he asked me what I play, Sir Gawain. And I was in this film with the shining suits of armor, myself, my best buddy, Kieran Heinz, was, was.

• 33:29Jason Bateman?

  Wow.

• 33:29Speaker 04

  Sherlock. And, and the, the bug really got me down. I thought, this is just.

• 33:36Will Arnett?

  But it must be, I mean, you started your first film role, you're playing Jesus. I mean, everything after that is kind of a step down. I mean, you know, when he comes to you, he says, do you want to play this knight? You're like, guy, I was Jesus in the last one, so.

• 33:48Jason Bateman?

  How do you even prepare an audition to play Jesus? I mean, practicing your faces in the mirror, playing Jesus Christ. I would not really know where to, where to go. How did he even research that, you know?

• 33:58Speaker 04

  Yeah, I don't know how, I can see the gentleman's face, Mr. Anderson. I think it was Ken Anderson, who was in charge of this little outreach. And I, I, I didn't do an audition, I just met him and he knew I was Catholic, Irish Catholic. And we never really spoke about professional questions. And, and this shoot was only about three weeks or something, you know?

• 34:28Jason Bateman?

  You, you just reminded me there, I had a vision of, Will, didn't you play Jesus Christ unarrested for one of your illusions? Didn't Job had like a, some sort of a religious themed illusion? And I remember you in some sort of a loincloth.

• 34:43Will Arnett?

  Yeah, and then I went into the cave and I was gonna come back and then I got stuck in there. And.

• 34:50Jason Bateman?

  And started whining.

• 34:51Will Arnett?

  Yeah, it was a really, it was a very, not a very well thought out illusion by my character.

• 34:57Jason Bateman?

  And you ate nothing but plums and turnips for a few weeks just to prepare for that scene, right?

• 35:03Will Arnett?

  They ended up finding me, because I got, there was a false sort of back on the cave that I had put on the stage. And then they ended up, they were, one of those storage facilities, and they were, they were doing one of those faux, you know, those shows where they go into storage facilities and they auction off all the stuff. And they find this rock and they find me living in there.

• 35:25Jason Bateman?

  Oh, boy.

• 35:26Will Arnett?

  Sort of months later, I've been stuck in this cave. And it was very thin at the time. And then, but Liam, you mentioned Tony Hopkins. And for Tracy in Wisconsin, by the way, Liam, if you're not, I don't imagine you're a listener of the podcast, but Tracy is Sean's sister in Wisconsin. So anytime we mention something that people might not know, we talk to Tracy and explain to her.

• 35:47Jason Bateman?

  Specifically, the inside baseball of showbiz.

• 35:50Will Arnett?

  Yeah. So Tracy, Tony Hopkins is Sir Anthony Hopkins. And you worked together the first time, I imagine, on The Bounty, is that right?

• 35:59Speaker 04

  That's right. It was The Bounty and we shot it in Moraya, which is an island, beautiful island, just off Tahiti. And, oh my God, I turned 31, so I turned 70 in June this year. So that's a bunch of years ago.

• 36:15Will Arnett?

  First of all, you look incredible.

• 36:17Jason Bateman?

  Please let me be as, yeah.

• 36:19Will Arnett?

  Yeah, you look incredible, but I know. It's, but, but, so you, you meet, so you're there and you're, you've only made a few films at that point, am I right? You made sort of five or six films?

• 36:30Speaker 04

  Yeah, I'd done some stuff in Ireland and some mini-series in England.

• 36:36Will Arnett?

  And, but now you're, you're there and you're in Tahiti with, with Tony Hopkins and Mel Gibson?

• 36:43Speaker 04

  Tony and Mel, Daniel Day-Lewis, a bunch of great British actors.

• 36:50Jason Bateman?

  You had trouble casting it, huh?

• 36:53Speaker 04

  But you may do.

• 36:56Will Arnett?

  What was that experience like making that? I loved that. I bring it up just because I loved that film so much. I remember as a youth, I watched it many times.

• 37:05Speaker 04

  Oh, gosh. Yeah, it was good. It was six day weeks. And I just, we all just loved Tony because he, as well as, you know, Captain Bligh, he played brilliantly.

• 37:23Speaker 04

  He took care of us. He took care of his crew. And a lot of the crew were guys just fresh out of drama school in England, you know? First job, and there you are in Tahiti, you know? But Tony just took care of us. And I'll never forget that quality he had. And we had a lovely, a great director, Roger Donaldson, from New Zealand. But he and Tony didn't get on terribly well because he would do endless takes. Like, I remember one day, 27 takes of hoisting the princess, Tahitian princess up onto the bounty.

• 38:00Will Arnett?

  Oh, God.

• 38:01Speaker 04

  Like 27 takes and the sun beating down and stuff. And what's the point of my story? It was just great. It was a great experience. But we all started developing that. What's the opposite of cabin fever? When you're surrounded by water all the time? There's a scientific, there's a medical name for it. So if somebody sent you out a newspaper from Britain or Ireland, you would read this from cover to cover.

• 38:29Will Arnett?

  Sure.

• 38:29Speaker 04

  And then someone would, you'd give it to your friend to read to, you know? By this stage, the newspaper's a week old, 10 days old. And then you'd start, I'd say, Richard, where's my paper? I said, but you read it, you finished it. It doesn't matter. I want a bag. So there's, you know, we were there for three months. So we were just all starting to get on each other's nerves.

• 38:56Jason Bateman?

  Yeah. If you watched The Bounty today, do you, do you think you would have notes for your performance? Has your, has your style of acting changed over the years? Uh, that, that presupposes that you watch what you do. Are you one of those actors that watches what you do? Cause some, some don't like to.

• 39:14Speaker 04

  No, I don't, I don't. I, I like to say at, at least once. I mean, if I'm playing the lead.

• 39:20Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 39:21Speaker 04

  I'd, I'd watch it at least a couple of times, but that's it.

• 39:24Jason Bateman?

  This is while you're shooting, right? You'll watch one of the playbacks to see if you're kind of on the right track?

• 39:29Speaker 04

  No, I, I don't do that, Jason. I don't. Unless it's some technical thing where the, the director needs me to be on the left. And I think, no, I should be on the right of this character, for example.

• 39:39Jason Bateman?

  But you'll watch the final product, though?

• 39:41Speaker 04

  I, yeah, yeah, I would watch it.

• 39:43Jason Bateman?

  So what about your, so what about your style? I, I just, I ask that because I'm so, I get so cringey when I look at the old stuff that I've done. And I say, oh my God, I do it so differently today. Because you have such a, such a wide body of work. I'd imagine it would be pretty fun or scary or what? For you to look at all the stuff you've done way back when?

• 40:03Speaker 04

  Oh God, yeah.

• 40:07Speaker 04

  It's overacting, isn't it? I don't know if you ever feel that. Anytime I see something, I think, oh God.

• 40:13Jason Bateman?

  That's what I notice I try to do is do less and less every year.

• 40:15Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah.

• 40:17Sean Hayes?

  If I do something, I, I used to, when I was younger, would watch, um, would watch it once. And now I don't watch anything I do. And if somebody comes up and says, that was really good, I'll check it out. But if nobody says that to me, I don't need to see it.

• 40:29Will Arnett?

  Yeah, but Sean, Sean, you were on a very popular comedy sitcom for many years.

• 40:36Sean Hayes?

  The Millers?

• 40:37Jason Bateman?

  Yes.

• 40:37Will Arnett?

  Yeah, The Millers that we were on together. And, uh, we, you were, you were like in, you know, in the top, one of the top shows for, for many years. And it was, it would be hard to avoid that. I'm gonna ask you this. So how, how did you avoid that? Did you, you must have seen episodes of your show when it was on the air? Cause it was kind of everywhere.

• 40:58Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, Liam, take a seat just for a second. Um, I would, um.

• 41:04Sean Hayes?

  No, I would want, I would, yes, you're right. It would, the reruns, when they used to have reruns and all that stuff. And I, it is hard to avoid, but the reboot of The Will and Grace, uh, three seasons?

• 41:13Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 41:13Sean Hayes?

  I haven't seen one episode, just because.

• 41:15Will Arnett?

  Just like everybody else.

• 41:16Sean Hayes?

  I was there.

• 41:17Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, just like everyone else, I heard that. So you wouldn't have viewing parties, Sean, of your, of your stuff?

• 41:21Sean Hayes?

  No, maybe when I was like 27 and I was on up to 20. Liam, I want to ask you something that, you know, with the, because you mentioned 100 films. It's just an unbelievable accomplishment. There has to be an award for that or something, or we'll make one for you and send it.

• 41:34Speaker 04

  And by the way, that includes, you know, narrating documentaries and stuff like that.

• 41:38Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, but that's.

• 41:38Jason Bateman?

  And let's not forget the one you did with my sister called Satisfaction, where she played a little rock and roll star.

• 41:43Will Arnett?

  Wait, is that you?

• 41:45Sean Hayes?

  Oh, yeah. Is that true?

• 41:46Jason Bateman?

  Oh, yeah.

• 41:46Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 41:47Jason Bateman?

  She played, she played the lead of a band and what, what did you, I forget.

• 41:50Sean Hayes?

  Oh, I saw that movie.

• 41:51Jason Bateman?

  Did you play the, the manager, the band manager or something?

• 41:53Speaker 04

  No, I, I was a retired ex kind of Keith Richards sort of guy.

• 42:02Speaker 04

  Yeah, I think they wanted me to manage them or so, you know, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 42:07Jason Bateman?

  You did not submit that, that year for Academy consideration, did you?

• 42:11Speaker 04

  No.

• 42:11Jason Bateman?

  No, no.

• 42:13Will Arnett?

  Wait, Jason, I remember that film. That was your sister's kind of breakout attempt from Family Ties.

• 42:18Sean Hayes?

  I remember that film.

• 42:19Jason Bateman?

  I think Julia Roberts was in the film too, I think.

• 42:21Speaker 04

  Julia was in it too.

• 42:22Jason Bateman?

  What was it, like 30 years ago?

• 42:23Speaker 04

  Yeah, it was a long time.

• 42:24Sean Hayes?

  Has to be.

• 42:25Speaker 04

  I know Julia was, Julia was 19.

• 42:27Jason Bateman?

  Wow.

• 42:28Speaker 04

  So that made me, I was 30, 34.

• 42:31Sean Hayes?

  How do you, you're crazy with numbers. How do you remember 31 years old, 19 years old?

• 42:35Jason Bateman?

  He's like Will Arnett. Are you one of those people that can remember what you did like April of last year versus June of last year?

• 42:40Speaker 04

  No, no, that I can't.

• 42:42Jason Bateman?

  Will Arnett can't?

• 42:42Will Arnett?

  I can, yeah.

• 42:43Speaker 04

  Names, names too. I'm, I'm, the older I get, I have real trouble with names. And even if I'm calling my sisters, I have three sisters, I get their names confused.

• 42:52Sean Hayes?

  I know, it's tough, it's tough, I know.

• 42:54Will Arnett?

  Jason's the same with names. Well, Jason's the same with faces.

• 42:58Sean Hayes?

  I was just gonna say.

• 42:59Jason Bateman?

  I think I discovered my, uh, smallest dog, uh, yesterday, who, you know, we've had for. Eight years now. I think he's got facial blindness, right? Whatever that thing is.

• 43:10Sean Hayes?

  He barks at me every day.

• 43:13Jason Bateman?

  And usually about 30 seconds after he just saw me last. And he'll look at me like I'm a stranger that's just broken in through the through the side window and I'm coming in to do a lot of damage. Like, guy, I just fed you.

• 43:27Sean Hayes?

  The actor in you wants desperately for him to recognize you.

• 43:30Jason Bateman?

  Please, I walk around with my headshot and it's signed? He doesn't want it.

• 43:35Will Arnett?

  I watched, you always have a stack of headshots with you, which I admire. I think that takes a lot of guts.

• 43:41Jason Bateman?

  Just to try to disarm some sort of unfriendly.

• 43:43Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 43:43Speaker 04

  But Jason, your dog's interesting. Maybe it's, that is interesting. I adore dogs.

• 43:50Jason Bateman?

  I do too.

• 43:50Speaker 04

  That's fascinating.

• 43:51Jason Bateman?

  I do too, but not this one.

• 43:53Will Arnett?

  Jason, by the way, speaking of your dog, I met this guy yesterday, you know Frank, your dog.

• 43:57Jason Bateman?

  My top dog?

• 43:58Will Arnett?

  Your top dog. I met a guy yesterday, and this is a true story, I forgot to tell you, and he said, "My dog is Jason's dog Frank's brother." And I said, "No kidding?" And he said, "Yeah, the guy who I..."

• 44:11Jason Bateman?

  First of all, my dog's name is Hank. Nice to meet you, not Frank. And so, his dog is related to my dog Hank.

• 44:19Will Arnett?

  What's my dog's name?

• 44:20Jason Bateman?

  Your dog's name is Petrol.

• 44:24Will Arnett?

  Nice chai.

• 44:24Jason Bateman?

  Peter.

• 44:25Will Arnett?

  You didn't remember either.

• 44:26Jason Bateman?

  Chan.

• 44:28Will Arnett?

  Bella, Bella.

• 44:30Jason Bateman?

  Bella. So, yeah, now that's my other dog, who recognizes me right away. He's very loving, very lovely. I don't have a problem with him, yeah.

• 44:39Will Arnett?

  Sean, we all cut you off. Sean, go, please.

• 44:41Sean Hayes?

  No, I just was interested in our guest.

• 44:43Jason Bateman?

  Favorite color, Liam? Did I guess it? Did I guess it, Sean? No, now you've told us your funny theater story. What's your funny movie story? He's the worst, Liam, I'm so sorry.

• 44:56Will Arnett?

  I don't want to get into movie stories, but I'm surprised Sean hasn't asked this yet because I'm fascinated, one of the great films of all time, Schindler's List, and how that experience came to be for you.

• 45:06Sean Hayes?

  Yeah, well, I was gonna ask that, too.

• 45:08Will Arnett?

  I know.

• 45:08Sean Hayes?

  I know everybody wants to know it, but I don't know any stories, and it's one of my favorite films.

• 45:12Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 45:15Speaker 04

  I was living out in Los Angeles at the time, and I, my agent sent me this script, which was just breathtakingly horrible and beautiful and incredibly well-written and...

• 45:29Speaker 04

  I knew Steven Spielberg a little bit. Was it Eric Roth or Steven Zalian, one of the two? Steve Zalian. Yeah. Yeah, thank you, Jason, Steve Zalian. And I had read for Steven with a bunch of kids when he was casting Empire of the Sun. Oh, wow, Christian Bale's first movie, right? I guess he remembered me and so I was asked to go in and meet him for Schindler's List. And I had, you know, because it's set in the 1940s, I hired a 40s suit and I tried to keep my hair short and stuff. And I spent about two, two and a half hours with Steven and Steven had a camera. It was just he and I in a room.

• 46:12Speaker 04

  And I'd prepared a couple of little speeches from the film, the script. And then after it was over, he said, thank you very much. And I felt great. I thought, well, if I don't get this, I've spent two and a half, three hours with one of the great movie makers of our time. And then I went to, yeah, I went to New York after that to do a play. I had to get on the stage again.

• 46:36Will Arnett?

  I thought you were gonna say, then I went to Ed Debecks and got a dream.

• 46:41Speaker 04

  So you go to New York to do a play. How long did you make you wait? Well, it was quite a few weeks. I was doing this play where I met my wife. It was called, the play was called Anna Christie. I met my wife and Steven and his wife, Kate, and Kate's mom came to see the play. And they came backstage afterwards, which is very sweet of them. And I opened my door and I was half undressed and stuff. I said, oh, my God, Steven, gee, I'm sorry, let me put a robe on or something. And Kate's mom was quite emotional, quite teary after the performance, the play. And I went and just gave her a hug. Apparently, on the way, when they left and they were driving back home,

• 47:26Speaker 04

  Kate said to Stephen, "That's just what Schindler would have done." Now, Stephen told me, "No, it was your audition, you know, that got you the part," but I like the story of, you know, "That's what Schindler would have done." What's the great quote from the Man who Shot Liberty Valance? When the legend becomes fact, print the legend.

• 47:51Speaker 04

  I like to think it's because I hugged Kate's moan, you know, that got me the part. Yeah, that's great. And now, a word from our sponsor.

• 48:01Sean Hayes?

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• 48:43Sean Hayes?

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• 49:30Speaker 05

  Monday on NBC. The wait is over for St. Dennis Medical. Strap in. The comedy about doctors.

• 49:37Speaker 06

  Woo, let's get it!

• 49:39Speaker 05

  Without boundaries.

• 49:40Speaker 06

  Healthcare is a fun, fulfilling, exciting career.

• 49:43Speaker 07

  Is it because you're getting sued and puked on all the time?

• 49:46Speaker 05

  And they're back for another dose.

• 49:48Speaker 07

  I want to show you the secret sauce of St. Dennis: the staff. This place is hell, literal hell. Well, that's enough secret sauce.

• 49:56Speaker 05

  All-new St. Dennis Medical, Monday on NBC.

• 50:01Jason Bateman?

  And now, back to the show. Working with, you've worked with so many great directors. Yeah.

• 50:09Jason Bateman?

  Can you remember anything that, from any of them, I imagine Spielberg would be right near the top of it, that really kind of took your breath away, like, ah, that is the difference in great directing versus good directing? Is there anything that was super noticeable about what he or any of the other incredible directors you've worked with have done, their ability to make a set comfortable, the way in which they work with the crew? Anything that stands out, maybe even specifically about Steven with that film? Because it was just so finely done.

• 50:44Speaker 04

  It was interesting with Steven because it was the first film he had done without using a storyboard. Normally, he always uses storyboard and you can go up and see the cartoons drawn of what you're going to shoot.

• 50:55Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 50:56Speaker 04

  He didn't. And, you know, he was telling the story of his... his people.

• 51:03Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 51:03Speaker 04

  His Jewish people. And he was incredibly nervous.

• 51:08Jason Bateman?

  He felt the responsibility of the story he was telling you.

• 51:10Speaker 04

  Yeah, and I remember the first day, we finished the play here in New York on Sunday, Sunday afternoon. I flew out on Monday. And as far as my memory, as far as I can remember, it was either Tuesday morning or the Wednesday morning, like, 5:30 in the morning. We were at the gates of Auschwitz, the real Auschwitz in Poland. And I think the World Jewish Congress, I think that's the right name, didn't give Steven permission to shoot inside Auschwitz. But the production design team did a brilliant job. We shot outside of Auschwitz, but made it seem as if it was inside Auschwitz.

• 51:49Jason Bateman?

  Right, I remember that story.

• 51:51Speaker 04

  And I was dressed in a big fur coat and hat and... Nice and warm, even though it was unbelievably cold. And this train was coming in and all these extras were coming out as Jewish people and German extras with guard dogs. And I was, it was terrifying, it was terrifying. And I remember, I was waiting to do my bit. And I walked down, you know, by the barbed wire fences and looking inside at the huts that, you know, the Jewish people were crammed into all those years ago. And I was just looking and Branko Lustig, who was one of the producers, he's dead now, God rest him, but he come up to me and said, how do you feel?

• 52:36Speaker 04

  And I said, um, yeah, I'm okay, Branko, you know, I'm warm enough and just looking forward to starting, you know? And we were looking at the huts and he pointed out to a hut and said, see that one there? Third one from the left, I'm making this up now, but. He said, that's where I was. No way. At the age of six, well, I just lost it. Wow. Yeah, I lost it. My knees started to shake. And I thought, fuck, this isn't acting, this isn't a fucking movie, this is, this is a piece of history we're telling here and I'm not worthy. I just kept saying to myself, I'm not fucking worthy, I'm a fucking Irish actor.

• 53:19Speaker 04

  I should go back to Ireland, go into the theater, what the fuck am I doing here? Dressed up in this big frick coat and here to save these Jewish people. I just, it was terrifying. And, but Stephen was great. And it's a little scene where I, I pulled one of these girls, little Jewish girls up. Because these prisoners shouldn't have been sent to Auschwitz. They're supposed to be working in my factory because Oscar Schindler had this armaments factory. Yeah. And he was there to save their lives, otherwise they were going to die in Auschwitz. So I go up to this guard and say, how dare you do this? These are my people, they have to go back.

• 54:02Speaker 04

  And I'm shaking like and I I pulled a little girl up and I I was doing it too gently because I she was freezing. Yeah. This little actress. And Stevens came over to me and said, you gotta just listen, stop the niceness. Grab her, pull her up, her life's at stake here, you know. Yeah. So I had to, I apologized to her, I said, look, I'm gonna grab you quite roughly and pull you up so that this guard sees you. She was only about seven or eight years of age. Hmm. And I'm supposed to say to the guard, I need, I need this little girl, look, those small hands, so they can clean the inside of of metal casings for the armaments, but I could never quite say the line right. You're speaking in German at this point, right?

• 54:47Speaker 04

  Supposed to be, yeah. Yeah.

• 54:49Will Arnett?

  But in English.

• 54:51Speaker 04

  But anyway, I'm rambling, Jason, I I. No, no, I love this. All the directors are different, you know, they're all.

• 54:57Will Arnett?

  Listen, I Liam, I I have such a, you just reminded me, the first time I saw that film, because I've seen it a few times, like a lot of people. And so incredibly moving hearing you talk about, I can't imagine feeling that. And it comes across that sense of responsibility that you felt in that moment. And I remember I was at the theater, the old Chelsea Theater is, I don't think it's called that anymore, but on twenty third at Eighth Avenue, I was living in New York and.

• 55:20Speaker 04

  Oh, yes.

• 55:21Will Arnett?

  Yeah, and and I remember I was seeing that film and there was that moment where there the chaos of everybody coming off the train and stuff and everybody's freaking out. Nobody knows what's going on. And at that very moment in the theater itself, the fire alarm went off. So they've got those little lights that are blinking. And there's a sound going, whee, whee, and the blinking, and it was, it was almost like it happened.

• 55:43Speaker 04

  Wow.

• 55:44Will Arnett?

  Uh, you know, that it was part of the film and people started freaking out in the theater and people were openly weeping. Because it just heightened an already very heightened moment.

• 55:55Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 55:55Will Arnett?

  And it made everybody. And it forever changed the way it was just such a visceral thing to actually have happen in that moment and.

• 56:06Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 56:06Sean Hayes?

  Yeah.

• 56:07Jason Bateman?

  What do you, what do you, what do you get into that is, that is not really, really hard work like you usually do?

• 56:14Will Arnett?

  Yeah, are you still boxing too? Is that part of your regimen?

• 56:18Speaker 04

  I have a bag. Well, I have a gym and I use a bag sometimes, but I just like to, I just like to read. I mean, I'm a reader, you know?

• 56:27Jason Bateman?

  Really?

• 56:28Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 56:29Will Arnett?

  Wow, you guys are, we're very similar Liam.

• 56:32Jason Bateman?

  Easy, well.

• 56:33Will Arnett?

  No, Liam and I are very similar. I like to read and I also have a bag right out the door here. Jason has a bag, but he keeps it behind the toilet and he just goes in there for a couple of minutes at a time. Or he plays past the bag with one of his Hollywood friends.

• 56:45Jason Bateman?

  But don't use too much of it. Yeah, I gotta get through the night. Yeah.

• 56:49Sean Hayes?

  Liam, what, I would like to ask this question. What drugs have you dabbled in? Because here's the thing. When you, here's the thing.

• 56:56Jason Bateman?

  He's our secret weapon Liam, he's the best. Keep going, sorry Sean.

• 56:59Sean Hayes?

  No, please. When you're doing, like you said, a hundred things, like a hundred films, whatever docs and everything.

• 57:05Jason Bateman?

  Sure.

• 57:06Sean Hayes?

  And you're traveling and the time changes, the night shoots and this stuff, when you were younger, you're like, how am I gonna get through this? You had to have like partaken in something to get through all of those many, many films of just endless months of shooting.

• 57:17Jason Bateman?

  Are you Cindy Adams? What is going on?

• 57:19Will Arnett?

  Do you want him to admit to drug use?

• 57:21Sean Hayes?

  I'll talk to you about the, we've talked about the drugs we took.

• 57:24Jason Bateman?

  Go ahead. Tell, tell Rona Barrett what the last time you participated in, in some sort of illicit drug use.

• 57:30Sean Hayes?

  You don't have to answer that if you don't want.

• 57:33Jason Bateman?

  Okay. I'll bet, I'll bet, I'll bet, I'll bet the way you stay up and peppy nowadays is, is all that exercise, I'll bet you eat well, sounds like you're staying nice and sane with lots of reading. It doesn't sound like you're doing a lot of things to slow yourself down or hurt yourself, huh?

• 57:49Speaker 04

  Nah, that's about it. It's very boring. I mean, I do, I fly fish.

• 57:53Jason Bateman?

  Oh, really?

• 57:54Speaker 04

  Whenever I get a chance.

• 57:55Will Arnett?

  We should hook you up with Jimmy Kimmel.

• 57:58Jason Bateman?

  Jimmy Kimmel.

• 57:59Speaker 04

  Jimmy is, yes, I'm gonna go to Jimmy's Lodge sometime this year. I don't know when. I was supposed to go last year.

• 58:06Will Arnett?

  Oh.

• 58:07Jason Bateman?

  There's a big group of us going in a few months. We're gonna send you the invite. Come on up.

• 58:11Will Arnett?

  We're gonna go this summer.

• 58:12Jason Bateman?

  And you can teach me.

• 58:13Speaker 04

  Are you really?

• 58:14Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, swear to God. Yeah.

• 58:15Speaker 04

  Well, it it it looks spectacular.

• 58:17Jason Bateman?

  It's stunning. It's it's he's really done a great job with it.

• 58:20Speaker 04

  I can't wait. Oh, that's terrific. I can't wait.

• 58:22Will Arnett?

  Wait, Sean, do you still Sean, you still wanna know about Liam's drug use, right?

• 58:25Jason Bateman?

  No, that's. Oh, yeah, sorry. Sorry, Sean.

• 58:27Speaker 04

  No, no, no. Um, I.

• 58:30Jason Bateman?

  You don't have to answer his garbage question, Liam.

• 58:32Sean Hayes?

  Interesting.

• 58:33Jason Bateman?

  You just.

• 58:33Speaker 04

  No, what, no, it's it's fair enough. And I'm not trying to avoid it. I I just, uh, certainly when I was in Ireland in the theater.

• 58:41Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 58:41Speaker 04

  After shows, we'd go to the local pub, you know, and have I adored Guinness, absolutely adored it.

• 58:48Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 58:48Sean Hayes?

  Same.

• 58:48Speaker 04

  And then you turn a certain age and it sticks to you. Do you know what I mean? You start putting on weight and it's like, oh, my God.

• 58:55Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 58:55Speaker 04

  And I switched to red wine. I absolutely adored that.

• 58:58Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 58:59Jason Bateman?

  Does that put that puts on less less weight, but there's the hangovers not as fun, right?

• 59:04Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 59:04Jason Bateman?

  All that sugar?

• 59:06Speaker 04

  I stopped drinking eight. Yeah, just over eight years ago.

• 59:10Will Arnett?

  Wow.

• 59:10Speaker 04

  No, I must say I don't miss it.

• 59:12Sean Hayes?

  Oh, that's good.

• 59:13Will Arnett?

  Same here. We I Jason, we we don't we don't drink. I don't I don't drink, uh, I don't drink basically out of vanity. I can admit that. But but that's okay.

• 59:22Jason Bateman?

  What's the remaining vices for for all of us? I mean, my it's pathetic with me. It's, uh, it's, yeah, it's like sugar. Um, and like crunchy salty snacks.

• 59:31Sean Hayes?

  And, uh, you know, Jay.

• 59:33Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 59:34Will Arnett?

  Oh.

• 59:34Jason Bateman?

  Golf?

• 59:35Sean Hayes?

  No, pot gummies.

• 59:36Jason Bateman?

  Oh, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, gummies. Well, I mean, is that a vice? I don't know. It's legal nowadays, right?

• 59:42Will Arnett?

  Have you tried those, Liam? Have you tried the gummies with the THC in it?

• 59:45Jason Bateman?

  And the CBD.

• 59:45Speaker 04

  No, I have. I have gummies with the CBD.

• 59:48Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 59:49Speaker 04

  And a little bit of melatonin. And I take those every night.

• 59:52Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, puts you right out.

• 59:53Speaker 04

  I I do have trouble sleeping.

• 59:54Will Arnett?

  Jason's got some other stuff for you, and the first one's free, he says.

• 59:57Jason Bateman?

  First one's free. I'm just gonna just stay on afterwards. Let me get your P O box or something. You people still use P O boxes?

• 1:00:03Will Arnett?

  Sean, you like you like weed. You like to smoke weed every once in a while.

• 1:00:06Sean Hayes?

  Well, I don't. I haven't smoked in years. I can't smoke it anymore, but um, but I do. I do eat the the gums.

• 1:00:11Will Arnett?

  The gummies as well. You don't mind that. And then what's your other vice? You like, uh, you don't drink coffee. Do you drink coffee? Liam, are you a coffee guy?

• 1:00:18Speaker 04

  No, I I I give up caffeine. Um, I know, so fucking boring.

• 1:00:23Will Arnett?

  No, you're very disciplined.

• 1:00:24Speaker 04

  And I'm I'm constantly this. Uh, it's a mug.

• 1:00:29Jason Bateman?

  What is that?

• 1:00:31Speaker 04

  Okay, it's a Stanley mug. I adore them. It keeps my black decaf tea hot for five or six hours. And it's also my little security blanket, do you know what I mean? I take it on set. I try and get it into every movie.

• 1:00:46Will Arnett?

  Oh, you do? You try to get in? Do you ever smash guys in the face with it? Because you're in these actors.

• 1:00:50Speaker 04

  Including Clash of the Titans. That's gonna happen. That is gonna happen.

• 1:00:54Jason Bateman?

  What are you, are you doing anything currently that you're embarrassed of? Any crappy TV you're watching? Any, are you, you say you read a lot. Are you reading a comic book that you're not, that you're not proud to reveal to anybody?

• 1:01:05Speaker 04

  No, um, crime, I, I, I'm, I'm still into my Nordic noir crime.

• 1:01:11Jason Bateman?

  Oh, no, here comes Will.

• 1:01:12Will Arnett?

  Like Nesbo, Nesbo and those guys?

• 1:01:15Speaker 04

  Yeah, Nesbo's good. And Henning Mankel, he passed away about four years ago. He, he was extraordinary. And I just played Philip Marlowe in my last film. So I, I'd never read, much to my shame, Raymond Chandler before, so I, I, I read most of his stuff for preparation, I guess.

• 1:01:36Jason Bateman?

  Will has met his match with the smokiest voice on this podcast. Do you guys do any voiceover work?

• 1:01:41Will Arnett?

  We've done three, we've done three films together. It should be, and the other, and we've never met. And also, uh, we were talking before about Ray Fiennes. He also was in Lego Batman and played Alfred to my Batman. And we had a lot of scenes together.

• 1:01:54Jason Bateman?

  Oh, I didn't know that.

• 1:01:55Will Arnett?

  Yeah, and we have yet to meet. And I, uh, I'm just such a fan. I can't wait.

• 1:01:59Speaker 04

  Oh, he's terrific.

• 1:01:59Jason Bateman?

  Liam, do you do any voiceover work other than the, the, the animation every once in a while? Are you the voice of any particular product on television? You do any commercial stuff? You know, because Will, Will talks about GMC trucks all the time and, uh,

• 1:02:13Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 1:02:14Jason Bateman?

  Lucky for them, he's still doing it.

• 1:02:16Speaker 04

  I don't. I, I like doing documentaries and I've done quite a few of those.

• 1:02:22Speaker 04

  But products, no.

• 1:02:24Jason Bateman?

  You should, my God. Liam, you would clean up. Have you done any of the Ken Burns documentaries?

• 1:02:30Speaker 04

  I, yes, I have, actually. During lockdown, I did, uh,

• 1:02:36Speaker 04

  Oh, there's one on Anne Frank that's coming out. Oh, that's cool. I played Anne Frank's father, just a few lines. And the current one on Benjamin Franklin, I think, has come out. I have a small part. Is that one out yet or no?

• 1:02:52Jason Bateman?

  Not yet.

• 1:02:53Speaker 04

  Ken Burns is a genius.

• 1:02:55Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, he's been on the show. He was incredible.

• 1:02:57Will Arnett?

  We had him on, we had him on, yeah.

• 1:02:59Speaker 04

  You did?

• 1:03:00Will Arnett?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:03:00Speaker 04

  And he's so erudite and he's just.

• 1:03:03Will Arnett?

  Did you see the Ali?

• 1:03:05Jason Bateman?

  Muhammad Ali one?

• 1:03:06Speaker 04

  I haven't seen that one yet. And I have to say Muhammad Ali was, is, always will be my idol. Always was.

• 1:03:15Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, that documentary is incredible. The one he did on World War II is incredible too, called The War.

• 1:03:19Speaker 04

  World War II, but the American Civil War, I have to watch that at least once a year. It's incredible. And it came out, I don't know, 25 years ago or something.

• 1:03:28Will Arnett?

  Well, I love that you that you love Muhammad Ali because you were, and I mentioned before, you did you did box a little bit, amateur boxer for a couple of years there.

• 1:03:37Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah, I started when I was nine. I think I had my last fight when I was like 17 or something.

• 1:03:43Jason Bateman?

  Oh, my God, that's old enough to get hurt.

• 1:03:46Speaker 04

  Yeah, it was starting to hurt.

• 1:03:48Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, because like kids punch each other all the time. But then you become a teenager and you got to really, you got to really be pissed off if you're going to get into that because you can get hurt. So, but boxing, so you were boxing as a as a as a young adult or adult, right? I mean.

• 1:04:03Speaker 04

  Well, at the age of 13, 14, I started to shoot up. I mean, I'm six foot four now.

• 1:04:08Jason Bateman?

  That's amazing.

• 1:04:09Speaker 04

  Then I guess it was about six foot three or something. And the punches were, yeah, they were starting to hurt, you know? And I remember once coming, we had a tournament in our little local parochial hall in my hometown back in Ireland. And I was boxing this guy. And I actually won the fight, but I felt in my heart of hearts, I didn't win that fight. But when I came out of the ring, my trainer said, OK, Liam, go on downstairs and put your clothes on. And I was.

• 1:04:42Jason Bateman?

  And fix your face.

• 1:04:43Speaker 04

  But I didn't know what he meant. Clothes go down. It was weird. And that was like a cane of a strange concussion, you know? So that was my last fight. I knew enough to think, fuck this, I'm getting out of this.

• 1:05:01Sean Hayes?

  You know, I did a friend of ours, Lisa Kudrow, produced this show called Who Do You Think You Are? And it traces your ancestry.

• 1:05:09Jason Bateman?

  Did she hit you hard in the face during the shooting of that?

• 1:05:11Sean Hayes?

  And all of my ancestors, you know, from Ireland, I'm Irish as well. And we went over to Ireland. Everybody is a drunk and a thug. Everybody fought and just fights everybody.

• 1:05:21Will Arnett?

  There's a great quote. Thanks, Sean.

• 1:05:23Sean Hayes?

  No, of my ancestors. Of my ancestors.

• 1:05:26Jason Bateman?

  Oh, your ancestors?

• 1:05:27Sean Hayes?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:27Jason Bateman?

  Not everyone in the country?

• 1:05:29Sean Hayes?

  No, not everybody Irish. But all my ancestors were just thugs and drunks. And it's like, why is everybody, I don't know. Everybody just seems to be, loves to be in fights.

• 1:05:37Speaker 04

  Where are they from, Sean? Where do your family?

• 1:05:40Sean Hayes?

  Dingle and...

• 1:05:41Speaker 04

  Oh, Dingle, beautiful.

• 1:05:42Sean Hayes?

  County Kerry. And, yeah, all around.

• 1:05:46Jason Bateman?

  You ever go back there, Sean?

• 1:05:47Sean Hayes?

  Just for the show I did.

• 1:05:49Will Arnett?

  Just to fight. Just to fight.

• 1:05:51Jason Bateman?

  It's so pretty over there, right?

• 1:05:53Sean Hayes?

  Oh, it's unbelievable. I think it's like the...

• 1:05:55Speaker 04

  Oh, Dingle, Dingle's very, very special.

• 1:05:57Sean Hayes?

  My grandfather's from Dingle and...

• 1:05:59Will Arnett?

  They have beautiful fruit from there, the Dingle berries. Have you tried?

• 1:06:02Jason Bateman?

  No, Will.

• 1:06:04Will Arnett?

  I'm thinking of something else.

• 1:06:05Jason Bateman?

  You are.

• 1:06:06Will Arnett?

  Liam, we've taken way too much of your time. You're, God, we could talk to you forever. You're just such a fascinating guy and one of those, just such a great performer. And I'm just in awe of your talent.

• 1:06:18Speaker 04

  Oh, shut up.

• 1:06:19Will Arnett?

  Thank you for saying that. No, it's true.

• 1:06:21Jason Bateman?

  Such a kind, kind man, too. So thank you for spending some time with us on your off day here.

• 1:06:27Will Arnett?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:27Sean Hayes?

  Thank you, Liam.

• 1:06:28Speaker 04

  Jason, can I say to you? I know I said this to you before when I saw you at the Garden a couple of years ago, three years ago or something. Please give... Victoria, your mom, I love.

• 1:06:39Jason Bateman?

  Now he's showing off. This guy is the nicest guy in the world. He meets my mother one time on a Pan Am flight. She was a stewardess for Pan, a flight attendant for Pan Am.

• 1:06:47Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 1:06:48Jason Bateman?

  Twenty years later, he runs into me. He's never met me before, but I guess she had mentioned, when she had met him, that I was her son. So, this is twenty years later, we're back, back at a Ranger game at Madison Square Garden. And I see Liam Neeson, I'm like, oh my god, I'd totally forgotten that my mother had said anything that she'd met him. He stops me, he says, hey, hey, you're Jason. I met your mother X number of years ago on a plane, and, how is she, is she doing? Remembered her name? It just knocked me out. And then when I told my mother that, she cried for a week. I mean, yeah, so, thank you so much for being such a kind man.

• 1:07:27Speaker 04

  Oh, please, and Justin too, please, please give him my love.

• 1:07:30Jason Bateman?

  I will tell her, for sure.

• 1:07:31Speaker 04

  And it's, and it's, it's something, and I can't quite remember Jason, but it was a flight from either Los Angeles to London, Pan Am, which doesn't exist, of course.

• 1:07:42Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 1:07:42Speaker 04

  Or from London to LA, I can't remember, and I was just, I was very vulnerable, not because I have a fear of flying, I don't. Something was happening, and for some reason, Victoria, your mom, spotted something in me, and she just took care of me.

• 1:08:00Jason Bateman?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:01Speaker 04

  She'd bring me tea and check on me every so often, and I'll just never forget it, you know, I was, she was

• 1:08:08Jason Bateman?

  Look at both these guys, just writing jokes. As soon as you said, "Take care of me," they, both of them wrote about six jokes in four seconds.

• 1:08:14Will Arnett?

  Luckily he followed up and said, "With a cup of tea."

• 1:08:16Jason Bateman?

  With a cup of tea, right, oh, they put their pens down.

• 1:08:18Will Arnett?

  I didn't need to, yeah.

• 1:08:19Jason Bateman?

  No, she was very accommodating, yeah.

• 1:08:23Will Arnett?

  Well, that's very sweet, it's so great, and again, Liam, such a fan, and thank you so much for your time on Saturday.

• 1:08:29Speaker 04

  Thank you, it's an honor to talk with you, the three of you, thank you so much.

• 1:08:35Jason Bateman?

  You say hi to Laura if you talk to her before I do?

• 1:08:38Speaker 04

  I sure will.

• 1:08:39Jason Bateman?

  I'd love her so much.

• 1:08:39Speaker 04

  She's going over to Ireland, I think, in May to shoot a film. I'm going over there to shoot a film with my best dear friend, Kieran Hines.

• 1:08:48Jason Bateman?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:08:48Speaker 04

  We're going to shoot a film in Donegal.

• 1:08:50Jason Bateman?

  You're not killing anybody in that, are you?

• 1:08:52Speaker 04

  Oh, yeah, quite a few.

• 1:08:53Jason Bateman?

  You are?

• 1:08:53Will Arnett?

  Yeah, of course, quite a few, quite a few, he said.

• 1:08:55Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 1:08:57Will Arnett?

  Why do you think he took the part?

• 1:08:58Speaker 04

  He's the Pope, a Catholic, come on.

• 1:09:02Will Arnett?

  The great Liam Neeson, thank you so much, our friend.

• 1:09:04Jason Bateman?

  Thanks, guys.

• 1:09:05Sean Hayes?

  So nice of you to do this. Thank you, Liam.

• 1:09:07Jason Bateman?

  That's great. Thanks, boys. Take care.

• 1:09:09Sean Hayes?

  Bye, pal. See you later.

• 1:09:11Will Arnett?

  The great Liam Neeson.

• 1:09:13Sean Hayes?

  When he came on the screen, I was like, what? That's so... What? Liam Neeson is so iconic. It's so crazy.

• 1:09:19Will Arnett?

  When I was like, I wanted to have him on the show and then they said, and Michael MGT said, yeah, we're gonna have Liam Neeson. He's gonna do it. I thought like, is this really gonna happen?

• 1:09:29Sean Hayes?

  That's crazy.

• 1:09:30Jason Bateman?

  Yeah, how'd you do that, Willie?

• 1:09:31Will Arnett?

  I don't know. I have no idea. I think he, I think that he thought, you know, I mean, he knew you a little bit and he was such a fan. He talked about seeing us at the Garden another time and he wanted to come say hi and he did not. And, uh, and his new movie, Memory, comes out April 29th, um, which is, uh, the guy, God, he's made a...

• 1:09:52Sean Hayes?

  I didn't even get a chance to ask him about Star Wars.

• 1:09:55Will Arnett?

  I know, Sean. Too bad. There's not enough Star Wars in the world. I know. Thank God. Such a shame that we never had an opportunity to talk about fucking Star Wars.

• 1:10:04Sean Hayes?

  He was in so many Star Wars movies. And then he was like, uh, he was one of those, um, stormtroopers in Force Awakens.

• 1:10:11Jason Bateman?

  And you spent your time with Wrath of the Titans, the sequel to Clash of the Titans.

• 1:10:15Sean Hayes?

  That's right.

• 1:10:16Jason Bateman?

  You're gonna lose, you're gonna lose your card. I swear to God.

• 1:10:19Will Arnett?

  Sean, I loved, I, I really, out of deference to you, I wanted to start it off by asking about theater stories because...

• 1:10:26Sean Hayes?

  Thank you. I have so many.

• 1:10:27Will Arnett?

  Because he started in the theater.

• 1:10:28Sean Hayes?

  I know. I love that. Thank you. Yeah, I love that. I love, you'd think people would have like, at the ready.

• 1:10:34Will Arnett?

  Well, it turns out, it does start to feel like the only, only embarrassing things in the theater happen to you.

• 1:10:40Jason Bateman?

  Yeah. And Kristin Chenoweth.

• 1:10:42Will Arnett?

  And Kristin Chenoweth. And the time that you poisoned Kristin Chenoweth. I forget how the story went, but, but...

• 1:10:47Jason Bateman?

  Maybe she just had an anxiety attack because the curtain call was such complicated blocking. So, let's look back. So you came from either side of the, so it was sort of like a bi entrance?

• 1:10:58Sean Hayes?

  Oh, a what? A bi entrance?

• 1:11:01Will Arnett?

  Wait, wait, wait, wait. Are we done?

• 1:11:03Sean Hayes?

  Bi!

• 1:11:04Jason Bateman?

  Bi!

• 1:11:07Will Arnett?

  I don't endorse it. Smart.

• 1:11:15Sean Hayes?

  Smart. Less.

• 1:11:20Will Arnett?

  Smartless is 100% organic and artisanally handcrafted by Rob Armjarf, Bennett Barbaco, and Michael Grant Terry.

• 1:11:32Sean Hayes?

  Smart. Less.

• 1:11:36Sean Hayes?

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• 1:12:17Speaker 03

  Time for a quick break to talk about McDonald's. It's the tangiest time of the year. For a limited time, head to McDonald's and get a McRib sandwich. Make it a meal by adding a medium fries and a soft drink like an ice cold Diet Dr. Pepper. So grab a McRib sandwich and embrace the tang. Save time by ordering ahead on the app. Participate at McDonald's for a limited time. Dr. Pepper is a registered trademark of Dr. Pepper, 7-Up, Inc.