Billy Bush | Club Random with Bill Maher

Bill Maher is joined by media personality and podcaster Billy Bush for a sharp, surprising, and hilarious conversation that bounces from family dynasties to the minefields of modern media. Bush opens up about growing up a Manhattan kid with presidential uncles, surviving scandal, and finding his voice again behind the mic. The two swap stories about Hollywood etiquette, Julia Roberts at the Oscars, psychedelic trips, and why everyone’s addicted to outrage. They debate fame, forgiveness, how tequila ages over time – and Bush recalls the wildest elevator encounter in New York, proof that even fame has its ups and downs. Subscribe to the Club Random YouTube channel: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/c/clubrandompodcast?sub_confirmation=1⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Watch episodes ad-free – subscribe to Bill Maher’s Substack: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://billmaher.substack.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Subscribe to the podcast for free wherever you listen: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bit.ly/ClubRandom⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Support our Advertisers: Go to https://zbiotics.com/RANDOM and use RANDOM at checkout for 15% off any first time orders of ZBiotics probiotics. Get $10 off your first month’s subscription and free shipping at https://www.nutrafol.com and enter promo code RANDOM Upgrade your wardrobe and save on @trueclassic at ⁠https://www.trueclassic.com/RANDOM⁠! #trueclassicpod #ad Buy Club Random Merch: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://clubrandom.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices ABOUT CLUB RANDOM Bill Maher rewrites the rules of podcasting the way he did in television in this series of one on one, hour long conversations with a wide variety of unexpected guests in the undisclosed location called Club Random. There’s a whole big world out there that isn’t about politics and Bill and his guests—from Bill Burr and Jerry Seinfeld to Jordan Peterson, Quentin Tarantino and Neil DeGrasse Tyson—talk about all of it. For advertising opportunities please email: [email protected] ABOUT BILL MAHER Bill Maher was the host of “Politically Incorrect” (Comedy Central, ABC) from 1993-2002, and for the last fourteen years on HBO’s “Real Time,” Maher’s combination of unflinching honesty and big laughs have garnered him 40 Emmy nominations. Maher won his first Emmy in 2014 as executive producer for the HBO series, “VICE.” In October of 2008, this same combination was on display in Maher’s uproarious and unprecedented swipe at organized religion, “Religulous.” Maher has written five bestsellers: “True Story,” “Does Anybody Have a Problem with That? Politically Incorrect’s Greatest Hits,” “When You Ride Alone, You Ride with Bin Laden,” “New Rules: Polite Musings from a Timid Observer,” and most recently, “The New New Rules: A Funny Look at How Everybody But Me Has Their Head Up Their Ass.” FOLLOW CLUB RANDOM https://www.clubrandom.com https://www.facebook.com/Club-Random-101776489118185 https://twitter.com/clubrandom_ https://www.instagram.com/clubrandompodcast https://www.tiktok.com/@clubrandompodcast FOLLOW BILL MAHER https://www.billmaher.com https://twitter.com/billmaher https://www.instagram.com/billmaher Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:01Speaker 00

  Low energy, unfocused, foggy? You might be dehydrated. Whether it's hot yoga, over 100-degree weather, or too much sun. Gator Light, with a specialized blend of five electrolytes, was scientifically designed to help move fluids into the body faster for rapid rehydration. Shop now at retailers nationwide. Gator Light: Hydrates Faster Than Water. Is it in you? Symptoms noted are signs of mild to moderate dehydration. Consult a healthcare professional if symptoms persist.

• 0:30Speaker 01

  When you shop Kroger Delivery, you can expect the savings you love and fresh groceries delivered right to your door. From delicious produce to everyday essentials, enjoy the convenience of delivery and the trusted selection you've come to know from Kroger. Because bringing you fresh, quality groceries is what we do best. Right now, enjoy free delivery on orders of $50 or more with your digital coupon. Restrictions apply. See site for details. Kroger: Fresh for Everyone.

• 1:00Speaker 02

  You don't have to pause your career to keep growing. Ohio State's Online Master of Public Health is built for professionals ready to lead. With a flexible part-time format, you can keep working while advancing your education. Gain expertise in population health leadership and management. Connect with peers across the health sciences and apply what you learn to your work and the communities you serve. You'll gain real-world experience through a hands-on practicum while preparing to take on greater responsibility and drive meaningful change. With three start terms each year, take the next step when it works for you. Move your career forward with Ohio State's MPH. 100% Online.

• 1:43Speaker 02

  Learn more at go.osu.edu/onlineph.

• 1:50Speaker 03

  You never did that to get to the top. You... you... did you?

• 1:53Bill Maher?

  No, I never even...

• 1:54Speaker 03

  You paused.

• 1:59Bill Maher?

  What... what's your status? Are you married now, or you...

• 2:02Speaker 03

  Why?

• 2:04Speaker 03

  Andrew and I are quite happy, Bill.

• 2:11Bill Maher?

  Billy.

• 2:12Speaker 03

  Billy.

• 2:14Bill Maher?

  You know, they used to call me Billy.

• 2:15Speaker 03

  I bet they did, Billy Marr.

• 2:17Bill Maher?

  I mean, I was ten fucking years old.

• 2:18Speaker 03

  How are you, my friend?

• 2:19Bill Maher?

  It's ridiculous when you're an adult.

• 2:20Speaker 03

  Goodness, I'd stand for you.

• 2:21Bill Maher?

  But you know.

• 2:21Speaker 03

  They told me to sit down.

• 2:22Bill Maher?

  No, please. Yeah, when I was ten, you know, I even had an uncle one called me Willie. I may call you Willie.

• 2:29Speaker 03

  Yeah, I had a, my father called me Willie. Willie, I want to talk to you.

• 2:33Bill Maher?

  Yeah, that's a.

• 2:34Speaker 03

  I don't like Willie.

• 2:35Bill Maher?

  I don't.

• 2:37Speaker 03

  Many reasons.

• 2:38Bill Maher?

  I don't like, I mean, the name itself is like the most generic name in the world.

• 2:42Speaker 03

  Yeah, I like William, though. I thought, you know, when I started doing like, you know, the Today Show and things, I thought, you know, Billy is too, maybe I should be Bill now. Is he, Bill is a.

• 2:53Bill Maher?

  If I had ever gotten confirmed like I was supposed to, right before my father quit the Catholic Church, I would have been William, I would have been what my father's name was and his father, which was William Aloysius Marr.

• 3:07Speaker 03

  Aloysius?

• 3:08Bill Maher?

  Aloysius is a very Irish, very, you're, you're a fucking wasp, so you wouldn't know this. There's no, nothing waspier than a bush. And just, I, I know I know this, but just, and I know you're not.

• 3:20Speaker 03

  Walk me through.

• 3:21Bill Maher?

  I know you're not in the muscle end of the family, Tom.

• 3:27Bill Maher?

  But tell me again, your, George Bush, the president, was your, is your uncle?

• 3:32Speaker 03

  Which one? The first one is my uncle.

• 3:35Bill Maher?

  The first one's your uncle?

• 3:36Speaker 03

  Believe it or not.

• 3:37Bill Maher?

  The second one's your cousin?

• 3:39Speaker 03

  Second, forty-three, George W. is my first cousin.

• 3:42Bill Maher?

  First cousin, so, meaning you share a...

• 3:48Bill Maher?

  So who's, who's your?

• 3:50Speaker 03

  Well, the reason everyone thinks he's my uncle because he's twenty-five years older than me. So at a sixteen first cousins, George W. is the oldest at seventy-eight, and I'm the youngest at fifty-three. So my father is the younger brother of George H. W. Bush, forty-one.

• 4:08Bill Maher?

  I'm so sorry I asked. I still don't.

• 4:10Speaker 03

  You get it. The old guy's my uncle, but he's like, would be a hundred and four or something if he was alive today.

• 4:16Bill Maher?

  Right.

• 4:18Speaker 03

  I thought you didn't drink.

• 4:20Bill Maher?

  Who fucking told you that?

• 4:21Speaker 03

  I thought you were just a weed guy.

• 4:23Bill Maher?

  I'm both. I barely, I barely.

• 4:26Speaker 03

  Do you eat? You look so skinny.

• 4:27Bill Maher?

  Yeah, I, I, I barely drink. I mean, it's so sad. I mean, one reason I love Wednesdays, not just because I could get to talk to some interesting person, free form, for as long as I want, but it's the one day I kind of allow myself a drink or two.

• 4:42Speaker 03

  Really? So you drink one day a week?

• 4:45Bill Maher?

  Basically, yeah. I don't think I, yeah, very often that is the case. I mean, you can't when you're, I'm seventy. You can't fucking drink when you're this old.

• 4:53Speaker 03

  Seventy? You know, you are, you're ageless, Bill.

• 4:56Bill Maher?

  Thank you.

• 4:56Speaker 03

  I was thinking about that today. I said, I wonder how old Bill Maher is. I think he just looks the same for the last thirty years. You're just Bill Maher.

• 5:03Bill Maher?

  Yeah.

• 5:04Speaker 03

  What's going on with the tincture now? Wait a minute. What is you doing so many things here?

• 5:08Bill Maher?

  I can't do this every week.

• 5:10Speaker 03

  What is happening?

• 5:11Bill Maher?

  No, I don't blame you. Everyone is wondering what jing I drink. It's this thing.

• 5:16Speaker 03

  It's the young.

• 5:17Bill Maher?

  Yeah, that's what it is. It's the jing.

• 5:20Speaker 03

  It's tiger blood.

• 5:21Bill Maher?

  There's the answer to it. The jing. It's the jing. That's what. I'm actually aging in reverse. I have tiger blood. I'm Benjamin Button. I don't know what the fuck. Where's my, oh, this, yeah, okay. But, um, so, okay, but you know, as a bush, um, did they ever give you shit about it? Like, because, I mean, we're such a politicized country.

• 5:44Bill Maher?

  I never seemed to think anybody really held that, you know, the super liberals are like, oh, we can't listen to a bush give the celebrity news.

• 5:54Speaker 03

  No, you know, I, you've got your power libs, right, in town. I'll never forget when I first did the Oscars.

• 6:04Speaker 03

  You know, I was doing the red carpet and I was living in New York at the time and I was having fun on Access Hollywood as the correspondent. And so I did the Oscars for the official red carpet show and I'm there and I, and I, it's a long, drawn out show, as everyone knows. And so I find myself in the hotel, in the lobby bar. And I've never met Julia Roberts before, but, you know, I'm, I'm, I knew of her, of course. And she was sitting right there at the bar. And it looked like she was alone and I pulled up and I said, you know, can I order a drink? Whatever. And she turns and she says, Billy Bush, you're the new guy.

• 6:43Bill Maher?

  Wow.

• 6:43Speaker 03

  On Access Hall. And I said, and you're obviously Julia Roberts. Hello. And we got talking for a little bit and she said, um, so are you gonna buy me a drink? Can you believe they don't give them free in the lobby of the Oscars? Holy shit. And I said, sure, of course, I'd be honored. What would you like? And she turns to five friends and she goes, hey, guys, Billy Bush is buying. What do we want? Boom, I got hit for a huge bill right there. And we talked politics for a minute. She's like, how could you be a Republican?

• 7:13Bill Maher?

  Really?

• 7:14Speaker 03

  And then you got like people like, there was like, you know, Rosie. You know, you'll get some shit from Rosie, but so what? Uh, but other than that, I think people, you know, H W, everybody loved. People had, you know, thoughts about W.

• 7:31Bill Maher?

  But.

• 7:32Speaker 03

  But now they love him. Now he's America's grandfather. If you see him in Gen Z thinks he's everything he does.

• 7:38Bill Maher?

  I would never be a Republican either. Um, but I find, I'm, and I love Julia Roberts, but I find that obnoxious. I just do. To say to somebody, how could you be? You know, you could say that to a lot of people about a lot of things. It's just, it's just not, and, and of course, that attitude has only gotten worse in this country. I mean, we're, we're at a terrible place, don't you think? I mean, the political, the political violence and just the hatred and the, you know, no one listens to the argument if they hate you so much to begin with. Your argument, I know this from stand up because when you're a stand up comic and you start out and you suck, um, some people handle, I handle it among the worst, which is you then insult the audience, you blame them for not laughing.

• 8:22Bill Maher?

  Now they hate you. Now, if you, you could say the funniest joke in the world. If they hate you, they're just gonna stab, they're not going to give it up to you. And I feel like that's exactly where we are in politics. Each side is like an audience that has been insulted by the comic and they're just not gonna give it up, even if they, even if it. Hurts them in some way, they will, what's the saying, cut off your nose to spite your face?

• 8:46Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 8:46Bill Maher?

  They will fucking do it, and that's where we are. Um, I don't, I don't know how we get out of it.

• 8:51Speaker 03

  But see, what Julia didn't understand is how do you know I'm a Republican? Just because my last name is Bush, you feel like that's the, you get the, you inherit the card and, and that's it? And, you know, I mean, I, I've certainly voted that way, you know, plenty of times, but I would call him, I'm a registered independent now. I don't have a party, I can't, I mean, they're so polarized that I just don't, I wouldn't be able to identify with either one. So I'll look at the person and take the person.

• 9:18Bill Maher?

  Yeah, right, and, and you know what, you don't have to apologize if you are, I mean, half the country is. And, um, you know, again, not my cup of tea, I could give you the list of reasons why I wouldn't be, you know, starting with they're too religious. And they're fiscal hypocrites, and right, and now they don't believe in democracy anymore, and blah, blah, blah. But I also would like to think I have things more in perspective, including, you know, Trump has put your cousin, George W. in perspective for me, I mean, I, nobody was-

• 9:51Speaker 03

  You miss him.

• 9:52Bill Maher?

  I don't miss him.

• 9:53Speaker 03

  You miss him terribly, I can see it.

• 9:54Bill Maher?

  I don't miss him, but-

• 9:56Speaker 03

  You would love him, you should have him sit right here, you should bust your ass to get him here.

• 9:59Bill Maher?

  Can you make that happen?

• 10:00Speaker 03

  He is so funny, and, and just easy hang, you would love it.

• 10:05Bill Maher?

  I would, I would.

• 10:07Speaker 03

  And he would paint you, and he would put a little portrait on the wall of-

• 10:10Bill Maher?

  Dude, I'm the guy who went to the White House and had the three hour dinner with Trump.

• 10:13Speaker 03

  I remember.

• 10:13Bill Maher?

  And got him to sign all the insults he said about me, it's right there.

• 10:17Speaker 03

  I, my god, that is so great.

• 10:19Bill Maher?

  Oh, it's the greatest.

• 10:20Speaker 03

  Bill, you caught so much shit for that, and I thought it was one of the great-

• 10:23Bill Maher?

  Oh, thank you.

• 10:24Speaker 03

  Great moves, and I was, I was actually rolling the picture on my podcast, and Chuck Labella, your booker and producer, great guy.

• 10:33Bill Maher?

  And friend of, producer of The Apprentice.

• 10:34Speaker 03

  He booked The Celebrity Apprentice forever, so he books Club Random, he does, he's a terrific guy. I look at the pic, a terrific guy, I sound like-

• 10:41Bill Maher?

  You sound like Regis.

• 10:43Speaker 03

  Larry David said that to me.

• 10:45Bill Maher?

  You sound like Regis.

• 10:46Speaker 03

  He says, you were, he goes, you know what you are? I said, what? Larry David said, you're a cross between Jason-

• 10:53Speaker 03

  Costanza, and a little Regis.

• 10:56Bill Maher?

  Yeah, there is a little Regis.

• 10:57Speaker 03

  But when I get excited.

• 10:58Bill Maher?

  And you've got that.

• 10:59Speaker 03

  I get up and I say, Bill, I can't believe it. Joy, where are we going? We're going out to dinner tonight. I was there last night. Bill Maher was in the table.

• 11:07Bill Maher?

  That's perfect. And you got the hair.

• 11:09Speaker 03

  He's got a little bit of the nasal. I miss Regis terribly. God, he was.

• 11:13Bill Maher?

  And you got the hair.

• 11:14Speaker 03

  He had great hair till the end.

• 11:15Bill Maher?

  Great hair.

• 11:16Speaker 03

  So do you.

• 11:16Bill Maher?

  Just like Regis. No, not like you. Not as full as you.

• 11:18Speaker 03

  No, not like me. But you can't. Not true.

• 11:21Bill Maher?

  Not like me.

• 11:22Speaker 03

  God's fair.

• 11:23Bill Maher?

  But can I?

• 11:24Speaker 03

  You don't believe in God, but I do. And God's fair. He doesn't give you everything. He gave me hair.

• 11:28Bill Maher?

  Can I pass a message from you to George W.?

• 11:32Speaker 03

  Please.

• 11:32Bill Maher?

  Okay, first of all, I was very hard on him.

• 11:34Speaker 03

  Should I text him right now?

• 11:36Bill Maher?

  No, no, no, no. No, no, no, no.

• 11:37Speaker 03

  Wait, I could do a voice note.

• 11:38Bill Maher?

  Don't do it right now.

• 11:39Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 11:40Bill Maher?

  But, you know, I was hard. I'm not taking it back. I wasn't for the invasion of Iraq. Or, you know, I mean, just the basic Republican policies that he championed were not exactly my cup of tea. But I also have things much more in perspective. He should know that, yes, I probably, looking back, could have been more reasonable. It shouldn't have always been just everything. Like, for example, and I have defended him on this, he had an idea to privatize Social Security. Well, you know, if you look at where money goes over a century. Now, you don't live quite a century, but you live half a century when you're at least, if you have a normal lifespan.

• 12:22Bill Maher?

  Where you put money, if you look, the stock market, even with its dips and recessions, the chart is like this. It goes quite a bit up. You know, it just makes more money. Whereas if you leave it in the bank, which is what we do now, it crawls along the bottom. Okay, it is safer, but it wasn't like the worst idea. The idea that everybody has to like jump on something because it came from the other team.

• 12:47Speaker 03

  That's exactly, and worse now.

• 12:48Bill Maher?

  I've also mentioned many times that, you know, to contrast him with where we are now, when Obama won.

• 12:57Bill Maher?

  He was in office, he had him in there, he stood with the other presidents, experts, and he said, "We want you to succeed," which is something you can't imagine Donald Trump saying, let alone, he doesn't even concede. Let alone attending the inauguration. Well, he doesn't concede the election, he's not gonna say, "Amy Klobuchar, good luck with the office." Yeah. It's just not. We're standing behind you, we really support you. I also gave him credit for, I mean, Dick Cheney's boy was Scooter Libby, and he did not do the wrong thing when Scooter Libby got in trouble, he was like, Dick Cheney almost broke up with him over that, and he was like, "No, it's not the right thing, you can't outspice and whatever he did." So, like, I, and he just was, it was just a different era, where we were Republicans,

• 13:41Bill Maher?

  Democrats, liberals, conservatives, but it wasn't at this horrible place we are now. And he was in, he was in line with the traditional Republican way of doing things, which, you know, it's not 100 to 0, you're terrible and the others, it's, was more like 60, 40 maybe, in my view, 70, 30, something like that, whereas now is just off the rails, so. We're missing nuances, is that what you're saying? Maybe he will hear that, and I'll tell you this, my friend Michael Kivis went to his house once, he, I think he knew Jenna. I know Michael. Yeah, great guy, and, and he, they got, my name came up, and he said- Michael Kivis went to George Bush's house? Yes, I think he was friends with- He's in every house, though.

• 14:23Bill Maher?

  He may have been dating Jenna, or one of the Bush twi, uh, girls, I think he was, or at least he was friends with, that's why he was there, he was in, at George's house. Maybe Barbara, she's a little- No, no, and, uh- Young one. My name came up, and he said, "Bill Maher was over and, and your, George Bush said, 'You let that man in your house.'" "Laura, get the cat off of me."

• 14:50Bill Maher?

  You let that man in your house? So that's where he is with me?

• 14:54Speaker 03

  No, I don't think so. I think I-

• 14:56Bill Maher?

  Well, he was then.

• 14:57Speaker 03

  Then. He's such an easygoing cat. He does not, you know, participate in anything. He's of his father's belief that you step out when you step out.

• 15:06Bill Maher?

  I would love to talk to him. I really would.

• 15:09Speaker 03

  You'd have to give him one of those, see if he'd enjoy one of those.

• 15:11Bill Maher?

  He would not do that.

• 15:11Speaker 03

  No, I don't think so.

• 15:12Bill Maher?

  No. But, uh, alright, so we've cleared up your family history. What about your future?

• 15:19Speaker 03

  Where am I going?

• 15:19Bill Maher?

  Well, I don't see you anymore. I used to see you and then TMZ. There was a perfect-

• 15:24Speaker 03

  I'm done with Access Hollywood. I mean, I'm done with Extra, which was the last one.

• 15:29Bill Maher?

  Why?

• 15:29Speaker 03

  Because it's just, I'm-

• 15:31Bill Maher?

  You got bored with it?

• 15:31Speaker 03

  Shrinking, yeah, it's just like, you can't say anything. It's, it's-

• 15:37Bill Maher?

  It's not a show for saying.

• 15:38Speaker 03

  No, I wanna say things, Bill. I like what you do. I like, I wanna say things. That's why I did-

• 15:43Bill Maher?

  Say them.

• 15:44Speaker 03

  Podcast.

• 15:45Bill Maher?

  What do you wanna say?

• 15:46Speaker 03

  You know who I got a problem with?

• 15:47Bill Maher?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 15:48Speaker 03

  Look, I love watching you. I love watching, uh, you know, I, I, the, the podcast universe to me is fantastic. I should have done it years ago. But, you know, I started this Hot Mics podcast, which is a nice wink to the, uh, to the history and like, the mics are hot and now we know they're on.

• 16:05Bill Maher?

  Oh.

• 16:05Speaker 03

  Now we know they're on. And, uh, and it's fantastic. I get all kinds of people coming in. I talk about whatever I wanna talk about and I'm, I don't worry. The head of HR is me.

• 16:16Bill Maher?

  Man-

• 16:17Speaker 03

  It's great.

• 16:17Bill Maher?

  You are, I mean, among a fairly now long list of people, uh, who, America, wow. The way they just jump to something and then like, a few years later, sometimes even one year later.

• 16:34Speaker 03

  What happened to that?

• 16:35Bill Maher?

  It was like, okay, you know, do we have to judge everybody by their least perfect moment on a bad day? Or just, you know, it's just, I hope we're over that time because it's so obnoxious.

• 16:48Speaker 03

  I think we are, but I also think like we, it's, right now, I think it's about the algorithm, right? So someone hears something, like someone will watch what I say with you and they'll wait for maybe either one of us to say something that could be missed. And then they'll take that, they'll clip it, they'll put it out and-

• 17:06Bill Maher?

  Right.

• 17:07Speaker 03

  Isn't this terrible? And if there are any bites, no bites? Eh, shit, okay, we tried. To try to get it going.

• 17:13Bill Maher?

  I, I always said, somebody should do a show, if they were realistic about who they really are, called, Is This Something?

• 17:20Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 17:20Bill Maher?

  Is, is this something? Master bedroom, is this, is this any, could I, would, no, I'm not catching on, okay. You know, and that's all-

• 17:28Speaker 03

  Exactly right.

• 17:29Bill Maher?

  And that's all they fucking care about.

• 17:31Speaker 03

  That's exactly right.

• 17:32Bill Maher?

  Is scalps on the wall.

• 17:33Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 17:33Bill Maher?

  Scalps, can I say scalps?

• 17:37Speaker 03

  It's, it's beyond true. And if nobody bites, they, they move on. And then it's amazing, like, what actually does stick. I've seen people give grovelling apologies over absolutely nothing. I love to rate apologies.

• 17:52Bill Maher?

  But, I mean, to be just the guy who was, you know, at worst, just, um, trying not to offend somebody who is in the pecking order of show business, someone you don't want to offend. Like, who is it hurting? That, like, you were gonna change Donald Trump if you had said, "Sir, I will not stand for hearing a language like that." It's just not what people do. You hear things that you don't exactly approve of, and you don't have to, at every moment, take that moment and an opportunity to say, "No, sir, that will not suffi-" You know, it's just, just, thing, life is full of, like,

• 18:36Bill Maher?

  moment after moment. Some of them just let flow by.

• 18:40Speaker 03

  Not me. I've now changed entirely. If drunk Uncle Larry says something I don't like at Thanksgiving table, I'm all over it. Larry, that is beyond inappropriate. I will not sit here at this table.

• 18:50Bill Maher?

  I don't remember a Larry Bush on the political team.

• 18:52Speaker 03

  We had one.

• 18:53Bill Maher?

  And who's Jeb? That, that's also your uncle.

• 18:56Speaker 03

  So Jeb's my cousin. He's George's brother, so he's also my cousin.

• 18:59Bill Maher?

  Oh, okay. And do you, how often do you see them?

• 19:02Speaker 03

  Just saw them, uh, recently. They, um, my brother is running for governor of Maine.

• 19:09Bill Maher?

  Maine, does he live in Maine?

• 19:11Speaker 03

  Yeah, he, I gotta do that. Yeah, he lives in Maine.

• 19:13Bill Maher?

  Well, you don't gotta do that. People are, are you kidding?

• 19:15Speaker 03

  You can't, see, you have to live there at least five years in Maine.

• 19:17Bill Maher?

  Yeah, they've got it right.

• 19:19Speaker 03

  He's lived there five in a day, I'm kidding.

• 19:22Speaker 03

  We're a Maine family forever.

• 19:24Bill Maher?

  Hillary Clinton-

• 19:25Speaker 03

  Well, that was a great-

• 19:26Bill Maher?

  Did not live in New York.

• 19:27Speaker 03

  Can you say carpetbag?

• 19:29Bill Maher?

  Yeah, yeah. Is this any-

• 19:30Speaker 03

  Is this, is this something?

• 19:32Bill Maher?

  Um, uh, Robert Kennedy.

• 19:35Bill Maher?

  Not the current one, not the guy who eats bears. His father was the senator from New York.

• 19:42Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 19:43Bill Maher?

  Okay, they're the most famous Massachusetts.

• 19:46Speaker 03

  Massachusetts.

• 19:47Bill Maher?

  Family in the world. It's like they don't fucking care. Mitt Romney was the governor of Massachusetts. He's a Mormon from.

• 19:54Speaker 03

  God, yeah.

• 19:56Bill Maher?

  They don't care.

• 19:57Speaker 03

  He went back to the motherland and, uh, and became a senator. That's exactly right. So where should I go? I wanna, maybe I should be a politician. Give me a nice. I think I could win Rhode Island. What do you think? It's so small. I don't get to campaign very quick.

• 20:11Bill Maher?

  You don't have a connection to Texas like the other Bushes do, do you?

• 20:15Speaker 03

  Everybody thinks that, you know, because the George Bushes are Texas, but they're the only ones.

• 20:19Bill Maher?

  Where did you grow up?

• 20:20Speaker 03

  Manhattan.

• 20:21Bill Maher?

  Manhattan?

• 20:22Speaker 03

  Manhattan.

• 20:23Bill Maher?

  Wow.

• 20:24Speaker 03

  Yeah, Upper East Side, right by the mayor's mansion, Carl Shirts Park. Do you know it?

• 20:29Bill Maher?

  Carl Shirts Park?

• 20:31Speaker 03

  Eighty-six between York and East End. Carl Shirts Park is where the mayor's mansion is on the East River.

• 20:36Bill Maher?

  I used to, uh, after the clubs, you know, closed at 2:00 AM, we would eat at the Viand, which is on eighty-six on the Upper East Side. That was, yeah, because the comic strip was on eighty-second and second. Catch a Rising Star was on seventy-eighth and first. The Viand was open 24 hours. Oh, those were the days.

• 20:54Speaker 03

  Sit with the comics.

• 20:55Bill Maher?

  The fuck, yeah, the, oh.

• 20:56Speaker 03

  Smoke cigarettes, have coffee.

• 20:58Bill Maher?

  Smoke cigarettes, probably in the diner.

• 21:02Speaker 03

  Then you could.

• 21:03Bill Maher?

  Oh.

• 21:04Speaker 03

  And on airplanes.

• 21:05Bill Maher?

  Yeah. So when they, when they say Trump wants to take America back, I just wanna go back to the diner. Like, I don't want, I don't wanna go back with all the other bad shit. Just, just the diner where I could have any food at any hour and smoke cigarettes, but yeah. It's probably better that we don't.

• 21:23Speaker 03

  It's, it's, yeah. I love the fact that you're a comic, though. I think that takes a lot of. The fact that you got through. Getting your ass kicked a few times, you said when you suck and I mean, that's when I would have quit. Because I just don't know if I could handle it. You just took it. Until you broke through.

• 21:41Bill Maher?

  Man, I have.

• 21:42Speaker 03

  That's, I respect that.

• 21:44Bill Maher?

  It's funny, I've been.

• 21:46Speaker 03

  And nothing else.

• 21:46Bill Maher?

  Going to, to the comedy store every once in a while. Or the improv, although the improv has been like, closed like at midnight on Saturday, again, how the mighty have fallen. But the comics, the comedy store on Sunset, where I never really ever worked, I was not her cup of tea. But it's open, it's bigger, and it's like, they do a midnight show. So sometimes like after, you know, a dinner or something, I don't want to go home, and hey, let's go to the comedy store. I love it and, but boy, I watch these comics up there. And it really takes me back to, wow, if, if only I could have had an angel on my shoulder, or I guess I could have been a nice guy and told these,

• 22:30Bill Maher?

  these comics after the show. If you just didn't do this, my god, your life would be so much easier. But I guess it's just something you have to learn.

• 22:38Speaker 03

  Will you drive down and go do, you know, that comic thing?

• 22:41Bill Maher?

  No, I'm not doing, I stopped doing stand up at the end of last year. I, I.

• 22:46Speaker 03

  Did you ever, did you ever do stand up not prepared?

• 22:49Bill Maher?

  Never. Oh, well, that's not true.

• 22:51Speaker 03

  Just riff on a stage, or did you know what you were doing?

• 22:54Bill Maher?

  I mean, you know, when, it's always a combination of having a structure, yes, I was always that organized, I would have a structure. But sometimes you forget it. And then, yes, if you know where you're going, if you know, you can get back to the island, then you can drift off into the waters and explore. Sometimes you find great stuff out there. As long as you can always get back to where you know you have safe harbor and you can always get the joke. I mean, I'm sure there are comics who do it, that they just, let's just go out on the limb and see where it goes. A lot of them who you think did that really didn't know where they were going.

• 23:34Speaker 03

  Of course.

• 23:34Bill Maher?

  They had a lot of stuff, you know. I mean, we started with a lot of guys who would talk to the audience and of course. Because if it's the first time you're seeing it, you think this guy's a genius. But actually, the same answers come up from the audience all the time. So he's got this, sir, what do you do for a living? Nothing. How do you know when you're done? And he's, this guy's a genius. He came up with that. He came up with that five years ago. He says it every fucking night because somebody says that every night, you know?

• 23:58Speaker 03

  I bet you've had, you've had every situation, but the worst has got to be you get lost or you forget, like you're at an impasse. And I bet you've had the situation where from there you went down and tanked and/or the situation where from there you actually recovered because you saw something or someone did something and you got the wheels going again and it turned out to be a home run night. That, ooh, too much chance in that.

• 24:23Bill Maher?

  I did, you know, it's called putting in your 10,000 hours. I mean, I did so many zillion sets, everything happened. But the worst, the kind of thing I think you're talking about that's the worst, for me anyway, is sometimes you had to do two shows, often had to do two shows on the weekend. And if you forgot a joke that you thought you hadn't done in the second show, but you had done, you thought you only did it in the first show, but you actually did it in the second show. And now you do the same joke and the audience just, usually you're expecting a laugh and the audience just looks at you like, what a fucking fraud.

• 25:04Bill Maher?

  And that, it only happened to me once because I was so paranoid about doing it.

• 25:07Speaker 03

  What a fraud.

• 25:08Bill Maher?

  And then there was.

• 25:09Speaker 03

  And that strikes to the nerve.

• 25:10Bill Maher?

  Sometimes you have to do three shows in a night. And, and there was this cognitive dissonance when you're on stage because you memorize your set in order because you don't want this to happen. So like you'd be in the religious section of the third show and you're like, wow, part of my brain is telling me I did this joke because you just did it in the second and first show. But the other part of your brain is saying, no, no, no, no, you didn't, just do it. And it's so hard to commit to it with your full.

• 25:43Speaker 03

  Because if you don't go all in, I mean.

• 25:45Bill Maher?

  And you gotta, so it's just, it was, as soon as I could, I told my agent, I will never do a second show.

• 25:52Speaker 03

  And I didn't for years. With Amy Poehler, I mean, she's to me, one of the funniest people because she commits. And if there is silence, or she, at the Golden Globe, she did some act where she pretended to be Michael J. Fox's son or something. And she was in this bit as a little boy, I can't remember the exact, but it started to get like, this is not working. She didn't give a shit. She went right through, right through to the other side. People started laughing, they started laughing, would anyone else would have dropped out? And it was a home run. That I love.

• 26:24Bill Maher?

  I've always been a huge fan, I think she's brilliant. She lives across the street and I can't get her to do this podcast. Could you talk to her after you talk to George Bush, please?

• 26:33Speaker 03

  I will talk, let me first talk to George.

• 26:35Bill Maher?

  Okay.

• 26:36Speaker 03

  Let's get the order correct.

• 26:37Bill Maher?

  Literally across the street.

• 26:38Speaker 03

  You know who I ran, driving here to your house, I passed her ex-husband on a walk, who's a great friend.

• 26:45Bill Maher?

  Will Arnett?

• 26:46Speaker 03

  Will Arnett on a walk with his new girlfriend, I pulled over the window, had a nice, he looks very thin and fit and tan.

• 26:52Bill Maher?

  Well, he's got a new girlfriend.

• 26:53Speaker 03

  He's got a hot new girlfriend.

• 26:54Bill Maher?

  That's what, who's the girlfriend?

• 26:56Speaker 03

  She's a model, I think it's Carolyn Murphy, yeah.

• 27:00Bill Maher?

  Really?

• 27:00Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 27:01Bill Maher?

  Is she a current model?

• 27:02Speaker 03

  Age appropriate, the whole thing.

• 27:03Bill Maher?

  Age appropriate?

• 27:04Speaker 03

  Like not a 27-year-old girl, Will's my age.

• 27:07Bill Maher?

  Okay.

• 27:08Speaker 03

  Oh, I'm not gonna judge, I know you, Bill, and you've dated some younger ladies before.

• 27:13Bill Maher?

  I'm not gonna judge either.

• 27:14Speaker 03

  That's what's too young for me, my daughter's say 15 years older than your oldest child. I said, what? My girls have rules for me on that.

• 27:22Bill Maher?

  Say that again?

• 27:24Speaker 03

  She said, my oldest daughter said, you can't date anyone younger than 15 years older than your oldest child. So if she's 27, that puts me at 43.

• 27:34Bill Maher?

  That's why I don't have kids, because they make fucking rules that I, kids shouldn't be making the rules to begin with.

• 27:39Speaker 03

  You'd be a great father, Bill, I always thought that. Said you really is the one that got away, you should have been there.

• 27:44Bill Maher?

  I've said this many times, I'd be the first, people say to me all the time, Bill, if you had one of your own, it would be different. No, I'd be the first guy to look in the crib and go, still nothing.

• 27:56Bill Maher?

  It's true.

• 27:58Speaker 03

  That's enough tincture for you.

• 27:59Bill Maher?

  I never, I never liked kids when I was a kid.

• 28:03Speaker 03

  You took the tincture thing out and poured the bottle in. You're supposed to use the dropper.

• 28:08Bill Maher?

  Take it as a compliment, Bill. I just, I'm enjoying myself so much. I'm doing, I'm taking it right from the head. It's the, it's the jing that keeps me young. That, I keep coming up with slogans for these people.

• 28:19Speaker 03

  It's the jing.

• 28:20Bill Maher?

  It's the jing that keeps me young. Hey, the liquor doesn't hurt.

• 28:24Speaker 05

  Low energy, unfocused, foggy, you might be dehydrated. Gatorade Zero powders have been scientifically designed to help improve hydration balance in the body. With a clinically proven electrolyte blend and no artificial colors or flavors. Great tasting hydration, no matter where you're going. Shop now online or at retailers nationwide. Gatorade, hydrates better than water. Is it in you? Symptoms noted are signs of mild to moderate dehydration. Consult a healthcare professional if symptoms persist.

• 28:54Speaker 01

  When you shop Kroger delivery, you can expect the savings you love and fresh groceries delivered right to your door. From delicious produce to everyday essentials, enjoy the convenience of delivery and the trusted selection you've come to know from Kroger. Because bringing you fresh, quality groceries is what we do best. Right now, enjoy free delivery on orders of $50 or more with your digital coupon. Restrictions apply. See site for details. Kroger, fresh for everyone.

• 29:23Speaker 03

  Try a glass of jing.

• 29:25Bill Maher?

  Try a glass of this.

• 29:27Speaker 03

  What do we got there, tequila or something?

• 29:28Bill Maher?

  Yeah, tequila. I switched. I used to drink Jack Daniels, but you know, it's a little healthier, this stuff. And uh...

• 29:36Speaker 03

  No, it's not. That's what we tell each other. We all say that.

• 29:38Bill Maher?

  No, it is. It is. The agave, sure, everything is...

• 29:41Speaker 03

  Everybody has a way of reasoning. I know booze is booze.

• 29:43Bill Maher?

  I'm not saying it's health food. That's, that's...

• 29:46Speaker 03

  If you stick to one day a week, you're good.

• 29:48Bill Maher?

  That is true. That is true. But it depends on what you make it out of. I mean, you can make booze out of almost anything. I mean, vodka's potatoes, right?

• 29:56Speaker 03

  And many other things. You can make vodka out of potatoes, out of grapes. Sorac vodka, the one that Diddy used to have, that's out of grapes.

• 30:04Bill Maher?

  Oh, really?

• 30:05Speaker 03

  Yeah. Rice, I mean, anything.

• 30:07Bill Maher?

  Right, you can make it out of anything. The agave plant apparently is a little more healthy to begin with. But you're right, it's, look, it's poison is poison. And you are always making trade offs.

• 30:19Speaker 03

  Sometimes we need a little poison, Bill.

• 30:21Bill Maher?

  Exactly.

• 30:21Speaker 03

  Especially these days.

• 30:22Bill Maher?

  You're always, except for Brian Johnson, we are always making trade offs with our future self. You're saying, you know, if I smoke this, will it cost me five minutes at the end of my life? I'm good to go with that bargain.

• 30:36Speaker 03

  You've lived a great life, you've accomplished a lot.

• 30:39Bill Maher?

  Well, let's not.

• 30:40Speaker 03

  But you're also, you're frozen in time, you look the same age, it's incredible. I'm sitting up here very close to you and I'm saying, I don't know if you have a great dermatologist or something, but you look young. The lines aren't really extreme.

• 30:52Bill Maher?

  I think it's not having children, and I don't mean that as a put down for children. I just mean that there is something psychological and of course also something physical. It takes a lot out of you, not to mention the old bank account. But there's something about the psychology of, I am not passing this along, I am it. I'm still it. Until I have another mini me, I'm still sort of the last one and I have to keep this going and I have to be the young one. And then when you have the younger one, I can understand that. The psychology is different. It's like you're passing it through this other person and you're more or less likely to have the eye of the tiger.

• 31:34Speaker 03

  In Hollywood, there's two stages of fathers, right? I mean, the little, you know, the school I went to with my kids, you know, James Khan was a father in the class with me. So I would have great times talking to Jimmy Khan, but he was on his second lap, you know? I mean, if you imagine you, Bill Maher, at almost 70 years old, at carpool. I mean, that's, it's embarrassing. It's, it's Bill Maher, look.

• 31:58Bill Maher?

  Oh, my God. First of all, I'd have to do it from a stretched limousine.

• 32:02Speaker 03

  Like Trump.

• 32:04Bill Maher?

  Which is very out of style. Nobody uses a stretched limousine anymore. They're like the unhippest thing in the world. Have you ever seen a celebrity in the last 10 years get out of a stretched limousine?

• 32:15Speaker 03

  It's all SUVs.

• 32:15Bill Maher?

  It's all SUVs and yes.

• 32:17Speaker 03

  We gotta bring back the stretch.

• 32:18Bill Maher?

  Oh, I would, I don't, you don't have to ask me, I'm there.

• 32:22Speaker 03

  I love a stretch.

• 32:23Bill Maher?

  I do did, I do did.

• 32:25Speaker 03

  I do did to do that.

• 32:27Bill Maher?

  I did too.

• 32:30Bill Maher?

  I don't know, either the pot or your personality is getting to me, but no, I did too. Uh, I used to love the old stretch limousine and that's how I would deliver my kids to school. I don't want to be seen, it's embarrassing, it's like being seen on the subway. Wow, Bill Maher, I thought you were doing well, what are you doing on the? You know, sometimes they get celebrities on the subway because they think it gives them cool cred. Wow, Mark Ruffalo, you're on the subway, you must be like a regular person and he is and a nice guy and I like his work, blah, blah, blah.

• 32:58Speaker 03

  Great work.

• 32:59Bill Maher?

  Whoever, I could have picked anybody, I just happen to.

• 33:01Speaker 03

  But no, that, you picked a good one. You really know you did. Ruffalo's a perfect one.

• 33:06Bill Maher?

  I gotta do.

• 33:07Speaker 03

  He looks like a homeless guy walking around New York.

• 33:09Bill Maher?

  And also, he wants to.

• 33:11Speaker 03

  He wants it that way.

• 33:11Bill Maher?

  Show his solidarity with the, you know, I get it, it's fine, I hope he's still my friend, he did the show once, I liked him, I still like him.

• 33:19Speaker 03

  What do you mean, I hope he's still my friend, did you say something?

• 33:21Bill Maher?

  Well, I just said something, we just.

• 33:22Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 33:23Bill Maher?

  We just used him.

• 33:23Speaker 03

  Mark is very forgiving.

• 33:26Speaker 03

  I know all the celebrities, Bill, I've dealt with them, I've, I've kissed every one of their asses, I know everything, I know what they taste like, smell like.

• 33:34Bill Maher?

  Yeah, you really have talked, well, you certainly have talked to every.

• 33:38Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 33:39Bill Maher?

  A-lister, whereas like, sometimes people say to me, it's so funny, you know, do you know? And then it's like somebody who I have, do you know Tom Cruise? I'm like, no, of course I don't fucking know Tom, you know, do you know?

• 33:52Speaker 03

  We have the same trainer.

• 33:53Bill Maher?

  You know, and it's like, no, I don't know these people, but you do.

• 33:57Speaker 03

  Well, I don't know them, I mean, some I know, they become friends, but I have the interactions and.

• 34:02Bill Maher?

  You've had interactions with all of them, I've, I've had no interaction.

• 34:06Speaker 03

  Well, except for the ones that come on the show.

• 34:08Bill Maher?

  That's very, well, certainly, Real Time has very, very, very few.

• 34:13Speaker 03

  A lot of writers and, and people.

• 34:15Bill Maher?

  Pundits, governors, senators, congressmen, people who, yes, exactly.

• 34:21Speaker 03

  Me, I've been on there.

• 34:21Bill Maher?

  Yes, but most people are, you know, the show people, this is not the show for them. Uh, you know, not, I'm putting them down, but you have to like, know shit. And celebrities mostly do not feel the need to know shit. And then there's many who like, uh, don't know shit, but it doesn't stop them from speaking.

• 34:43Speaker 03

  Because you can't just be known for memorizing words that someone else wrote and spitting them back into a camera. It's gotta be something more. And I think a lot of them get into trouble that way.

• 34:54Bill Maher?

  Well, I mean, I say this a lot on this show and they probably hate me for it in Hollywood, but they hate me anyway, so who cares? But they, celebrities are just, some of them do, yeah.

• 35:04Speaker 03

  They do.

• 35:05Bill Maher?

  The smart ones. But, but like celebrities, they're just a different breed. It's just like, they're loaded with talent. Talent is different than, you know, knowing things. And, you know, thinking ain't their best thing often. Now, that's many, many exceptions to that. There are many very smart people. And I always say, in this business, any asshole can get five good years doing something, but the cream rises to the top and usually stays there. There's a reason why, if you take the 20 greatest or most successful directors or the ones who are, they're all great direct, I mean, that, that, you don't get to be that by being a fuck up and not having a vision and not knowing what you're doing and not being able to deliver on time and on budget.

• 35:50Bill Maher?

  You're managing this $200 million enterprise of hundreds of people and, you know, this is a job that, if you, the mediocre people just are not going to make whatever, Dune or whatever fucking movies they're making.

• 36:03Speaker 03

  Avatar, James Cameron.

• 36:05Bill Maher?

  Well, Avatar, sure. Yeah, all of, but all of them. The one that's, I'm anxious to see the, the DiCaprio movie out now that's.

• 36:13Speaker 03

  People are raving over it. I watched the trailer.

• 36:15Bill Maher?

  It's called what?

• 36:16Speaker 03

  Another.

• 36:17Bill Maher?

  Another.

• 36:18Speaker 03

  Day.

• 36:19Bill Maher?

  Oh shit.

• 36:19Speaker 03

  Another way.

• 36:20Bill Maher?

  Another terrible, bad day.

• 36:23Speaker 03

  Another bearded Leo.

• 36:26Bill Maher?

  Why can't I remember?

• 36:26Speaker 03

  He looks very distraught. It looks good, though.

• 36:28Bill Maher?

  It looks great. And it seems to be about something, um, you know, which is a lot to say for a movie, but really, I mean, most movies are spandex and shooting rays out of the end of your fingers and, you know, I mean, that's fine. But like, it's great to see a movie that's an original story and he's an original director. And I'm saying, this guy, he did, uh, what did he do? Um, you know, what's the porn one? With Mark Wahlberg.

• 36:55Speaker 03

  Dirk Diggler.

• 36:56Bill Maher?

  Dirk Diggler. Why can't.

• 36:59Speaker 03

  Boogie Nights.

• 36:59Bill Maher?

  Boogie Nights.

• 37:00Speaker 03

  Baby.

• 37:01Bill Maher?

  And There Will Be Blood. I mean, he's a major director. And again, this, that, that cream rises to the top. People like that don't get to their job just by, you know, who you know and who you blow. Now, that's a little different in the.

• 37:15Speaker 03

  I would be right at the top if there are no problems.

• 37:19Speaker 03

  Who you know and who you blow.

• 37:21Bill Maher?

  Well.

• 37:22Speaker 03

  You never did that to get to the top. You, you. Did you?

• 37:26Bill Maher?

  No, I never even.

• 37:27Speaker 03

  You paused.

• 37:31Speaker 03

  You paused.

• 37:32Bill Maher?

  I did not know. What I was gonna say is, I never even accepted blowjob when I was the emcee at the comedy club. Because, you know, there were singers and once in a while it was.

• 37:42Speaker 03

  You didn't know.

• 37:42Bill Maher?

  Put out there that stage time, you know, maybe I could help myself with stage time. And I, I had enough integrity to like not go for, go for that.

• 37:53Speaker 03

  Now, that's a terrible thing.

• 37:54Bill Maher?

  Yeah, no, it is a terrible thing. Unless, well, here's a good philosophical question. Is it a terrible thing if the woman wants to do it?

• 38:02Speaker 03

  Well, I asked a very, um, very high profile agent in town. A guy with whom I play some golf here and there. And I said, when the Weinstein thing was happening. I said, how many, and he represents big stars. And I said, how many people do you think, you know, did it and they're like right now going, oh, I shouldn't, I mean. You know, and got a nice bump out of it. And he said, a lot, tons. Where, you know, eh, I'm gonna bang Harvey Weinstein. It's gonna be a horrible experience. But you know what?

• 38:37Bill Maher?

  Right.

• 38:37Speaker 03

  I'm gonna get something out of this and from there I'm gonna parlay and boom, onto the next thing.

• 38:42Bill Maher?

  I happen to know.

• 38:43Speaker 03

  Is it the worst?

• 38:44Bill Maher?

  No, I happen to know from reliable, very reliable sources. As much as Harvey Weinstein is also absolutely, in my view, maybe I have to say, cause I don't know where the legal thing is now.

• 38:58Bill Maher?

  No.

• 38:58Speaker 03

  In the right light.

• 38:59Bill Maher?

  A definitive rapist who belongs in jail. There also were instances of where it was a transactional.

• 39:08Speaker 03

  Of course.

• 39:09Bill Maher?

  I, I think I can get an Oscar out of this man. And is that worth a blowjob? It abs, that's their, that's their decision.

• 39:18Speaker 03

  I had, early in my day, a, a female executive, when I was a very young man, asked me to give a little spin. It was all part of a joke. It was all, give me a little spin. Look at you, you're so cute and young. I love all that bushy hair. Look at you, give me a spin, the whole thing.

• 39:36Bill Maher?

  I could totally see that happening to you.

• 39:38Speaker 03

  And I was a pig and shit. I thought it was funny, I enjoyed it. But, you know, at the end, I could have, man, I could have made.

• 39:44Bill Maher?

  Well, I mean, I could think of two instances when I was young and dumb, when I first lived in New York, and I was hit on by a gay man in two different instances that I could think of. And, and sadly, that, that's it in my life. Like, I, I would hope, I, I would have hoped I was more attractive than, than, but like, twice.

• 40:06Speaker 03

  You're an acquired taste. You're, you're very attractive.

• 40:09Bill Maher?

  No, and it was great because.

• 40:10Speaker 03

  Not traditionally.

• 40:12Bill Maher?

  I remember the second time I did a set at the comic strip. And I got off stage and there was this guy and he was like, sitting at the bar and he was like, he was just telling me he thought I did a great set. And of course, you know, you're young and you're hungry for any sort of adjuvant. You know, finally a fan, you know, somebody like, and he's like, great. And I'm just like, completely oblivious that this guy is gay and wants to fuck me and picking me up. And, and he's, and he's like talking and we're talking and it's like nothing. And then he's like, you know, you wanna grab a bite? And I was like, again, still stupid. Like, no, I gotta go and do another set at the other club, which I did. And come with, sure, whatever, comes with. And then like, we were eating at the club after the show.

• 40:57Bill Maher?

  And like, the second time, the subject of homosexuality came up. Not a, I, it went, bing, oh, I get it.

• 41:05Speaker 03

  Oh, late to the party.

• 41:07Bill Maher?

  This guy is bringing up the subject of homosexual, just out of the blue. Like, we could talk about.

• 41:13Speaker 03

  Art history. Sex with me.

• 41:17Bill Maher?

  Sex with men. I mean, anything.

• 41:19Speaker 03

  Whatever.

• 41:20Bill Maher?

  Furniture, literature, and, you know, ancient wisdom, any of them. Yeah, assholes, whatever, just whatever subject. And, and that's when I was like, oh, I'm on a date. I see. I'm on, I'm on a date and I don't know it.

• 41:34Speaker 03

  Yeah, you're being groomed.

• 41:35Bill Maher?

  And then I knew it and I was nice about it.

• 41:38Speaker 03

  I had the craziest thing happen to me in New York. You remember the Four Seasons on 57th Street? Not if they reopened it, but 57th and Park or whatever.

• 41:46Bill Maher?

  I remember staying there.

• 41:48Speaker 03

  Ah, you always stayed there. And I was staying there for work and I was out, you know, shopping or whatever. And I walk into the lobby and I go, they didn't check cards back then. They didn't check your room key. I just went right to the elevator. I get in. This guy gets in.

• 42:06Bill Maher?

  That's your white privilege, asshole.

• 42:08Speaker 03

  Okay, well, this other white man gets in behind me and he's, you know, in the elevator with me and he's talking, are you Billy Bush? I said, oh, yes, yeah. He goes, oh, I see on TV sometimes. That's, well, thank you. I push 12. He doesn't push a number. We get to 12, the door is open, I get out. He gets out. And I'm like, oh, you're on, you're on 12. You know, we're on the same floor. Have a great time. I take a left, I go there down the hall to the right, I go to my room. He goes to the left, goes down the hallway the other way. And he's like, okay, good to see you. And I'm like, okay, bye. And I get into my room. About three minutes later, two minutes later.

• 42:54Bill Maher?

  Yeah.

• 42:56Speaker 03

  And I had the latch on. I don't know why I never would put the latch on, but I had the latch on. And I said, hello? Because I had a weird feeling. And he says, "Hey, Billy, it's me. It's Andrew from the elevator."

• 43:09Bill Maher?

  You exchanged names?

• 43:10Speaker 03

  Whatever his name was.

• 43:11Bill Maher?

  But you already knew that from the-

• 43:12Speaker 03

  It's me from the elevator.

• 43:13Bill Maher?

  From the group, from the small walk?

• 43:16Speaker 03

  Small detail, Bill. Whether he said his-

• 43:18Bill Maher?

  No, no, no, it's not a small detail.

• 43:19Speaker 03

  Okay, we're gonna wrap up, okay.

• 43:21Bill Maher?

  If you exchanged names-

• 43:22Speaker 03

  Well, he knew mine, because he saw from television.

• 43:24Bill Maher?

  That's different. You're a celebrity.

• 43:26Speaker 03

  And he said, "It's me."

• 43:27Bill Maher?

  You said Andrew.

• 43:28Speaker 03

  And whatever his name was. Could be Phil. Phil from the elevator. "I'm the guy from the elevator." "Oh," I said.

• 43:34Bill Maher?

  Well, you're changing your story.

• 43:36Speaker 03

  This is a legit story, Bill.

• 43:37Bill Maher?

  I know it is, but it's-

• 43:38Speaker 03

  Bill, you don't want to relive it if it's not real.

• 43:40Bill Maher?

  It's important whether you knew his name before he came to the door.

• 43:43Speaker 03

  Maybe he said Andrew. I'm throwing out his- Larry. I go with Larry.

• 43:46Bill Maher?

  Okay, but that means that you had a conversation that-

• 43:50Speaker 03

  I'm not interested in the story anymore, Bill. I'm not telling you. And there's a big finish. I'm not telling you.

• 43:53Bill Maher?

  I'm very interested, but you have to admit, that's an important detail. Because it implies-

• 43:58Speaker 03

  I'm not gonna admit it.

• 43:59Bill Maher?

  A level of intimacy that would give him a little more purchase to knock on your door.

• 44:06Speaker 03

  Okay, did I say to him in the elevator, "Oh, what's your name?" No, I wasn't engaging in conversation. He might have thrown it out. I'm using a standard default name.

• 44:17Bill Maher?

  I'm done, counselor.

• 44:17Speaker 03

  I usually use Larry. But anyway, he knocks and I opened the thing a little bit. I go, "Yeah, can I help you?" And he goes, "Hey, I was just wondering, do you want to maybe have a drink or something in the bar downstairs?" And I said, "Ah, you know what? I gotta go meet my mom for dinner. Thank you so much." "Uh, no, I can't. I'm really in a-

• 44:38Bill Maher?

  This was not at the end of the night.

• 44:40Speaker 03

  No, this is right there, in the middle of the day, 4 o'clock. This guy, he liked to get it done early. And I said, "No, that's good." He goes, "Well, would you like to just maybe have a quick, quick drink?"

• 44:52Bill Maher?

  Oh, wow.

• 44:53Speaker 03

  And I went, "A quick drink? Like, we're just gonna do shots or something and it's gonna-" I said, "Uh, no, really, I'm so sorry. I really don't want to keep my mom waiting. Thank you." Uh, all good. And he goes- Then, do you want one of these? And he looks down at my crotch and he goes, "Do you want one of these?"

• 45:09Bill Maher?

  Oh, so you had to open the door?

• 45:10Speaker 03

  Oh, I had it like this. And I'm in my little robe, I'm gonna take a shower, and he goes, "Do you want one of those?" And I was like, "That means a blowjob."

• 45:19Bill Maher?

  That does.

• 45:20Speaker 03

  And I went, "That definitely..." I said, "No, thank you, though," and I closed the door. I actually thanked him for the offer. Closed the door, and I go right to the phone, and I called down the desk, and I said, "Hey, there is a guy on my floor. He lives at the end, at the, one of the 12, down at the end, and he just propositioned me, and you need to get him out of here, and, and I don't..." And they looked at him, they said,

• 45:41Speaker 03

  "Mr. Bush, I don't think the guy's on your floor.

• 45:45Speaker 03

  He's not staying in this hotel." And I went, "Oh, my God, the guy followed me in from the street the whole way, tracked me to the elevator, all the way up."

• 45:57Bill Maher?

  Kind of a flex. It's kind of a flex for you.

• 46:00Speaker 03

  Well, I mean, I'm an attractive guy.

• 46:01Bill Maher?

  You are.

• 46:03Speaker 03

  I was in good shape then, I was young.

• 46:04Bill Maher?

  You know, gay men follow you, and they don't even know you're gay. I guess they...

• 46:08Speaker 03

  But I wonder what his hit ratio is? Like, how many times does that work? 10% of the time?

• 46:13Bill Maher?

  I gotta say, if that was me, I wouldn't have narked the guy, though.

• 46:17Speaker 03

  Bill?

• 46:17Bill Maher?

  I wouldn't have, I would've just...

• 46:19Speaker 03

  Bill, he's on my floor and he's propositioning me, I'm absolutely calling and at least moving myself to another floor. You cannot do that to someone staying in a room.

• 46:28Bill Maher?

  Yes, you can.

• 46:29Speaker 03

  No, you can't.

• 46:30Bill Maher?

  And what was he gonna do? Get a battering ram and knock your door down?

• 46:33Speaker 03

  Maybe.

• 46:33Bill Maher?

  I mean, he, he, look, the poor guy is lonely.

• 46:37Speaker 03

  Are you defending this guy?

• 46:39Bill Maher?

  I'm, I'm, I'm...

• 46:40Speaker 03

  What the hell, what is in this? Let me have one.

• 46:43Bill Maher?

  Seriously?

• 46:44Speaker 03

  Yeah, no, no, no, no, no.

• 46:45Bill Maher?

  Oh, I am not defending him, I, I'm just saying, I would've handled it differently. I just would not have narked on him.

• 46:53Speaker 03

  Agree to disagree?

• 46:54Bill Maher?

  Yeah, absolutely.

• 46:55Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 46:56Bill Maher?

  Absolutely.

• 46:56Speaker 03

  Because everything I did, I stand firmly by, and I'd do it again.

• 47:01Bill Maher?

  Hey, this is not nuclear disarmament, it's just, it's a small...

• 47:06Bill Maher?

  I'm just saying, I wouldn't have narked the guy because I would feel bad for him. I would feel like...

• 47:10Speaker 03

  You would feel bad for the guy that followed me in from the street?

• 47:13Bill Maher?

  You know what? I remember when I couldn't get laid, and I remember how...

• 47:17Speaker 03

  Oh, here we go. There it is.

• 47:22Bill Maher?

  I remember when taking the, you know, the measure of myself...

• 47:29Bill Maher?

  And screwing up my courage to ask a girl out was like the hardest thing in the world. So I'm not saying this is like exactly like that. But it must took a lot, lot of courage to knock on a stranger's door. Well, not a stranger, apparently you had a conversation where you exchanged names. And then.

• 47:47Speaker 03

  This is an unbelievable relitigating.

• 47:49Bill Maher?

  It's just, it's just, it's just from his point of view. I mean, and again, were you really worried you were gonna get raped?

• 47:58Speaker 03

  I would not, you don't have to go to raped. I was, that I was being stalked in my room in a hotel, Bill, it was very uncomfortable.

• 48:05Bill Maher?

  Take it as a compliment.

• 48:06Speaker 03

  I like to be comfortable when I'm in my hotel room on the road.

• 48:09Bill Maher?

  Yeah, I do too. That's why they put the lock on the door. At no moment were you really uncomfortable, physically uncomfortable.

• 48:17Speaker 03

  I was uncomfortable as can be. My skin crawled and I realized I was followed down the street into my hotel. And I believe they put in the key card, they had a security guy checking actual cards to see if, you know, they match people's room.

• 48:33Bill Maher?

  So I guess this is a bad time to ask if you wanna have a drink in my living room after the show.

• 48:37Speaker 03

  Terrible, too soon. Although I can handle you. He was a big guy. You I can handle, I'm sure of that.

• 48:44Bill Maher?

  He was a big guy?

• 48:45Speaker 03

  He was a bigger guy.

• 48:46Bill Maher?

  So he was a bear?

• 48:47Speaker 03

  He was a bear.

• 48:49Bill Maher?

  Was he a bear?

• 48:50Speaker 03

  I know what that is.

• 48:51Bill Maher?

  I know, I'm sure you do. You're a sophisticated gentleman.

• 48:53Speaker 03

  Yeah, I know a bear when I.

• 48:54Bill Maher?

  I know, I know, but was he a bear?

• 48:56Speaker 03

  He was a bigger man than me.

• 48:58Bill Maher?

  A bigger man?

• 48:59Speaker 03

  I wouldn't call him a bear. A bear is really a great big guy.

• 49:02Bill Maher?

  Well, if you hadn't.

• 49:03Speaker 03

  If you know the town.

• 49:04Bill Maher?

  If you hadn't narked on him, I would say you were a bigger man than him.

• 49:07Speaker 03

  You know what, Andrew, I'm so sorry.

• 49:09Bill Maher?

  Yeah.

• 49:10Speaker 03

  Could've been something.

• 49:11Bill Maher?

  Andrew, again, we seem to be so.

• 49:13Speaker 03

  I think it was Andrew. I don't know why that feels right.

• 49:15Bill Maher?

  I feel like it totally was.

• 49:17Speaker 03

  Well, I've tried to wipe my memory from it.

• 49:18Bill Maher?

  Well, apparently you didn't do it.

• 49:19Speaker 03

  You're now cementing it in my memory forever.

• 49:22Bill Maher?

  Didn't do a good job because Andrew lives on in your mind. I mean, you remember his name after all these years. Are you sure there wasn't something more going on?

• 49:29Speaker 03

  I don't believe that I deserve this here. This is very random and cloud random.

• 49:35Bill Maher?

  You know, I've told this story before, but I think it's worth repeating. When I used to do Hawaii every year and we would stay at the Four Seasons in, with I think the most beautiful hotel in the world there in Maui. And the promoter was a gay man and, you know, Tinder is was a thing and is a thing. And you know where there was a lot of active-

• 49:57Speaker 03

  You mean Grindr?

• 49:58Bill Maher?

  Grindr.

• 49:59Speaker 03

  Grindr.

• 49:59Bill Maher?

  You know where there was a lot of ac-

• 50:01Speaker 03

  So I hear.

• 50:02Bill Maher?

  Active Tinder activity? The men's room of the lobby at the hotel. Because it's married men who are going down and having gay sex in the lobby bathroom of a five-star hotel while their wife is sleeping or getting a massage or something.

• 50:22Speaker 03

  What is that? What is that that says I want to go down there?

• 50:26Bill Maher?

  It's gay sex. It's guys who are married who are really gay or gay when drunk or I don't, you know.

• 50:34Speaker 03

  Gay in Europe?

• 50:37Bill Maher?

  I was never tempted like that, you know, like I never understood that, you know, in the mill-

• 50:42Speaker 03

  You've been a single man for a long time. Have you ever used the apps?

• 50:45Bill Maher?

  No, no. Oh, God, no.

• 50:47Speaker 03

  Because those are like, you know, there's the Nice app and the Tinder is just-

• 50:50Bill Maher?

  I wouldn't know how to get on-

• 50:51Speaker 03

  Hundred yards away.

• 50:52Bill Maher?

  I wouldn't know how to get on one if I wanted to and I don't want to.

• 50:56Speaker 03

  You've never done the Raya, which is the celebrity app, fancy people?

• 51:00Bill Maher?

  Absolutely not. Absolutely not. First of all, I don't think you can ever understand who you're meeting if it's on a screen. Also, who could possibly trust the pictures?

• 51:13Speaker 03

  True.

• 51:13Bill Maher?

  I mean, I, people put their-

• 51:15Speaker 03

  They'd be like, this guy thinks he's Bill Maher. That's so funny.

• 51:18Bill Maher?

  People put their pictures on lots of things now. It's like right on your phone, like if it's the contact or whatever. And like I know these people and I look at the picture and I'm like, okay, but I know you. This is not you. So like, why would I do that in a dating situation? And then, of course, being famous, it's not a good look. I mean, I've seen celebrities who got embarrassed being on Raya because you people take a screenshot and then you just, you don't want to look like some schmuck who's, and you'd see how he's, you're fucking- Hitting on someone, you know, it just, it just, everything about it is, is a red flag to me.

• 52:00Bill Maher?

  And again, I just don't think you can get the measure of a human being through a screen. You have to sit close to them, you have to be able to look in their eye, you have to see their facial movements. All of this is communication to the part of your brain that may not be, it may be unconscious, but it's all going in there and it matters and it, and it's everything. And you have to literally smell them, not, you're not aware of it, pheromones.

• 52:26Speaker 03

  Oh, a smell is great. Oh, the right smell is, you know it, when you hug.

• 52:31Bill Maher?

  Well, I.

• 52:31Speaker 03

  You can tell, and the laundry.

• 52:33Bill Maher?

  I don't like any smell.

• 52:34Speaker 03

  How's your laundry? Does your laundry smell good? You have good laundry smell and badly, you know, you've been with someone's clothes, they don't smell so, someone's clothes smell great.

• 52:43Bill Maher?

  Again, I feel, I feel like there's no need for smell anywhere in laundry or humans. Like, I don't, I don't remember any, like perfume, I don't wear a cologne or anything and I don't like it when a woman does.

• 52:56Speaker 03

  Really?

• 52:57Bill Maher?

  Yeah. I mean, if you, if you're.

• 52:59Speaker 03

  I don't like an overwhelming, but a whisper.

• 53:01Bill Maher?

  No.

• 53:02Speaker 03

  Of the right thing is, is great.

• 53:04Bill Maher?

  No, it's, it's saying, I mean, it feels like you have to cover up something not good. Right? I mean, isn't that a lot of why perfume themselves?

• 53:15Speaker 03

  I have a fantastic cologne, I'm not wearing it now, but it's a nice little light spritz, it's a spray and a pullback.

• 53:21Bill Maher?

  I hear.

• 53:21Speaker 03

  So it's so faint.

• 53:22Bill Maher?

  I hear it really worked on Andrew. I feel like.

• 53:26Speaker 03

  He caught the, he caught the backdraft and he followed me right in.

• 53:29Bill Maher?

  I mean, I feel like he was almost entrapped. Considering your.

• 53:34Speaker 03

  Now Andrew's the victim. Bill has turned this into Andrew is the victim. This is incredible.

• 53:39Bill Maher?

  Considering your cologne.

• 53:41Speaker 03

  What is this, Need the Press?

• 53:42Bill Maher?

  This is a case of entrapment. But, no, I mean, there are, Hollywood is just full of people who are married and then, you know, at a certain point, midlife, shall we say,

• 53:59Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 53:59Bill Maher?

  became gay men. I mean, very, some very prominent agents, managers, you know, stars, less because they don't like it out there sometime. I mean, we all know there are certain stars who are...

• 54:12Speaker 03

  We know, we all know. We all have a list, a short list of the ones we can't say.

• 54:16Bill Maher?

  Of the ones we can't say. And then there are others where...

• 54:18Speaker 03

  You go first. You name one, I'll do it. I'm not doing it, Bill. I'm not doing it.

• 54:22Bill Maher?

  I'm not gonna do it.

• 54:23Speaker 03

  That's a terrible suggestion. I would never...

• 54:25Bill Maher?

  But I will say this. There are stars who they say it about, who are not gay. Tom Cruise, they say, I don't think Tom Cruise is gay.

• 54:32Speaker 03

  No.

• 54:33Bill Maher?

  He's a Scientologist. It's different. It's even weirder. Not that being gay is weird. I'm just saying, it's, it's less than the majority. But Scientology, that's, that's his, I don't think you need Scientology and gay.

• 54:49Speaker 05

  Low energy, unfocused, foggy, you might be dehydrated. Gatorade Zero powders have been scientifically designed to help improve hydration balance in the body. With a clinically proven electrolyte blend and no artificial colors or flavors. Great tasting hydration, no matter where you're going. Shop now online or at retailers nationwide. Gatorade. Hydrates better than water. Is it in you? Symptoms noted are signs of mild to moderate dehydration. Consult a healthcare professional if symptoms persist.

• 55:18Speaker 01

  When you shop Kroger delivery, you can expect the savings you love and fresh groceries delivered right to your door. From delicious produce to everyday essentials, enjoy the convenience of delivery and the trusted selection you've come to know from Kroger. Because bringing you fresh, quality groceries is what we do best. Right now, enjoy free delivery on orders of $50 or more with your digital coupon. Restrictions apply. See site for details. Kroger. Fresh for everyone.

• 55:48Speaker 06

  Network freedom and flexibility. That's what you want in a healthcare plan. With a Humana Medicare Advantage PPO plan, you can see any doctor in the country who accepts Medicare, including specialists. No referrals. No kidding. Learn more at gethumana.com. See any doctor who accepts Medicare and is willing to bill Humana. Humana PPOs may not be available in all areas. Benefits and costs share may vary. Humana is a Medicare Advantage PPO organization with a Medicare contract. Enrollment in any Humana plan depends on contract renewal.

• 56:18Speaker 03

  You know, I did a big interview with Tom Cruise. We never, ever, back in the day, 2005, we never wiped the format of Access Hollywood. It's always story, story, story, news, news. But for Tom Cruise, I wrote him a letter. And I said, "Tom, you know, whenever we interview you, we ask, you know, who are you dating, whatever. It never goes anywhere. You always talk about Scientology." So I thought, "Let's talk about it." And I said, "I'd love to sit down with you."

• 56:46Bill Maher?

  I thought he didn't want to talk about it.

• 56:48Speaker 03

  No, this was back when he did. And then it didn't go well, and so he stopped. But it all began with my interview with him. And then it went to Oprah's Couch, and to Matt Lauer. "You're being glib, Matt. You're glib, Matt." That started, the first one was with me. And I did a half an hour interview, Tom. His people got back and said, "If you want to interview Tom, you have to go to each of the four Scientology centers in Hollywood. And you have to see them all and understand. You can't just..."

• 57:15Bill Maher?

  There's four right in Hollywood?

• 57:17Speaker 03

  Well, there's the Celebrity Center, and then there's the Narcanon, or the whatever, the Narcotics Center, and then there's the Human Rights Museum, and there's one other.

• 57:26Bill Maher?

  They have a good cleanse.

• 57:27Speaker 03

  Maybe the other one's a sauna. I don't know.

• 57:29Bill Maher?

  Did you know that?

• 57:30Speaker 03

  They have a good cleanse?

• 57:30Bill Maher?

  Scientology. I mean, the rest of it is so batshit. I mean, I can't even explain it.

• 57:36Speaker 03

  What's the cleanse? Like a drink, or like a steam?

• 57:38Bill Maher?

  Like, no, like a, like a, like a full cleanse. Like, if you really want to, like, get rid of the toxins in your body. I mean, more than just a day. Like, a real, it's like a month-long cleanse. But like, you know, if you want to, I haven't done it, but I know people who have, who are not Scientologists, but the cleanse is good.

• 57:56Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 57:56Bill Maher?

  After that, the whole thing goes off the rails.

• 57:58Speaker 03

  Goes off the rails. I'll try the cleanse.

• 58:00Bill Maher?

  But the cleanse is good. So it's just saying there's goodness in everything. That's all I'm saying.

• 58:05Speaker 03

  The point is, I sit down with Tom for a half an hour. We talk about everything under the sun. And that's where, you know, everybody picks up on stuff. We talk about psychotropic drugs, which he doesn't believe in. And I said, well, you know, you worked with Brooke Shields and, you know, I mean, she took this Paxil, you know, the drug for postpartum depression. It worked for her.

• 58:23Bill Maher?

  He's not completely wrong about the big idea.

• 58:26Speaker 03

  Well, it was not the time to say it because he said, oh, yeah, where's Brooke's career now? And then that went off.

• 58:32Bill Maher?

  Did he really?

• 58:33Speaker 03

  And then Matt Lauer followed up on that. And then they had their falling out. And it was, but Tom thought the interview with me went great. He wrote me a beautiful handwritten note and sent me an $800 bottle of wine. Billy Bush, you are an upstanding man. That was an incredible interview. You're way too good for these entertainment. You're terrific. You're the, and I was like floating on a cloud with Tom. And then two days later, the couch, and then Matt, and boom. He never talked about it again. But I will say this. You can judge Scientology. It works for him. Like, different things work for different people. The guy was dyslexic. He couldn't read a script. He couldn't memorize anything.

• 59:15Speaker 03

  That somehow connected to him and made him the most prolific actor there is.

• 59:19Bill Maher?

  Okay, that's like saying.

• 59:20Speaker 03

  That's a good point.

• 59:22Bill Maher?

  Yeah.

• 59:22Speaker 03

  You'll give me that.

• 59:23Bill Maher?

  But, well, I can't really because it's like saying the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia works for the King of Saudi Arabia. Yeah, it does.

• 59:33Speaker 03

  You can say that. It does.

• 59:34Bill Maher?

  It does. And Scientology, there's a lot of evil shit that goes on in Scientology. I mean, people seem to disappear. They seem to.

• 59:42Speaker 03

  You might disappear. Be careful.

• 59:43Bill Maher?

  I know. They seem to be imprisoned. They seem to be subject to like horrible things, like, you know, scrubbing floors for years. And, I mean, they, it's just, there is. I mean, and they're very litigious, and also they go after people who leave. I mean, look at Leah Remini and all the stuff she's exposed. So the fact that he's, you know, at the apex of this organization, yes, it works for him. And I say that all adding, I'm a huge fan of his work.

• 1:00:16Speaker 03

  Of his work.

• 1:00:16Bill Maher?

  And also.

• 1:00:17Speaker 03

  But he wouldn't be able to do his work without, according to him.

• 1:00:19Bill Maher?

  I would love someone to be able to ask him about this. Like, Tom, you are, everyone loves you. You're such a nice guy. Everything you do is right and perfect and blah, blah, blah. You must be aware that this is going on in this organization that you're a part of. I mean, don't you, don't you.

• 1:00:36Speaker 03

  No one's getting close enough to do that.

• 1:00:38Bill Maher?

  Right. And, but he's, he could stop that. He has the power. I mean, he, it's not David Miscavige. It's Tom Cruise who was really the head of the.

• 1:00:47Speaker 03

  But Tom doesn't appear with Miscavige anymore. He doesn't go to the, I, I think he's a passive member. I mean, at this point, I don't think, I mean, you know, anyone who's a high profile member?

• 1:00:55Bill Maher?

  Okay, but if you're aware of this shit that's going on and you, I mean, you know, look at those shows that Leah did. I mean, you know, people having to escape from it like it's a, a, a, concentration camp in North Korea.

• 1:01:10Speaker 03

  And I know her well.

• 1:01:11Bill Maher?

  It's just crazy.

• 1:01:12Speaker 03

  But it holds him together. What holds you together? It's not religion. So what's like the, is it the universe? What, what is the constant that centers Bill Maher?

• 1:01:22Bill Maher?

  It's a great question, Regis, and the answer.

• 1:01:24Speaker 03

  Because you know what? You look like you might need some centering, Bill. Centering. We're gonna center you.

• 1:01:32Bill Maher?

  You are, that is dead on, but, um, no, I am centered. I mean, I think that's a lot what holds me together is I never like really go too far either way.

• 1:01:44Speaker 03

  Yeah, you seem even keeled.

• 1:01:46Bill Maher?

  Even keeled, you know, it's, being a comedian, I think, helps with that because, first of all, it gives you perspective, you laugh at everything. Second of all, you never have that kind of like, you're not like a musician who gets on this level that's like, people are just treat you like a god. They don't treat comedians like a god. They like them. Comedy's king, but you're not like, you don't live in this, I mean, you, some of the musicians, you've interviewed musicians, I mean, they live in a bubble world of God know, I mean, because there is just such adulation that they don't have to live in reality. So, I never had that, which is great, and I also try not to get too low about the bad times.

• 1:02:27Speaker 03

  Yeah, that's the key.

• 1:02:28Bill Maher?

  And, and, you know, I also am very aware that I'm basically lucky. Good parents, stable upbringing, never enjoyed being a child, but it wasn't a nightmare, and...

• 1:02:40Speaker 03

  Were you an only child?

• 1:02:41Bill Maher?

  No.

• 1:02:44Bill Maher?

  Why does everyone ask me that?

• 1:02:45Speaker 03

  I know, you feel like you, I, I don't know.

• 1:02:47Bill Maher?

  I, I know. No, I have a lovely older sister who's gonna come out and visit me soon, and, you know, she still lives back east, and where we grew up in New Jersey, and...

• 1:02:55Speaker 03

  Where in Jersey were you?

• 1:02:56Bill Maher?

  Very, Bergen County, New Jersey.

• 1:02:59Speaker 03

  Sure.

• 1:02:59Bill Maher?

  She lives in the, in the city, the Republicans will be interested in, that Richard Nixon retired too, after he was president, Park Ridge, New Jersey.

• 1:03:08Speaker 03

  Wow.

• 1:03:08Bill Maher?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:10Speaker 03

  I lived in Jersey a little bit.

• 1:03:11Bill Maher?

  You did?

• 1:03:11Speaker 03

  Three years in the Jersey.

• 1:03:12Bill Maher?

  Oh yeah, cuz you grew up in the area.

• 1:03:14Speaker 03

  But I was out in Chatham, New Jersey, up by Morristown.

• 1:03:17Bill Maher?

  That's so Waspy Bush.

• 1:03:19Speaker 03

  Oh, no, it's not. No, these are some, no, it's not Westchester.

• 1:03:23Bill Maher?

  Oh, please.

• 1:03:24Speaker 03

  It's not Westchester, which is what, this is, Chatham is really good, like, simple, normal people. It's not, you're thinking of, you're thinking of Summit, Short Hills, now you're thinking of that. Chatham is really good people.

• 1:03:37Bill Maher?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:37Speaker 03

  Salt of the earth.

• 1:03:38Bill Maher?

  And yet, you had a two polo pony garage, I understand.

• 1:03:42Speaker 03

  Three.

• 1:03:45Bill Maher?

  Did you ever play polo?

• 1:03:46Speaker 03

  No.

• 1:03:47Bill Maher?

  No?

• 1:03:48Speaker 03

  No, I was a real athlete, though. Polo, that's not a, riding on, that would be too frustrating. I was a lacrosse player, a hockey player.

• 1:03:55Bill Maher?

  Where do you live now?

• 1:03:56Speaker 03

  I live in LA, for some reason, still. I'm not gonna die here in LA. That's, when I get off, at some point, I'm gonna, I'm gonna get out of LA. I'm an east coast guy, I, it's...

• 1:04:07Bill Maher?

  Really?

• 1:04:07Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:04:08Bill Maher?

  See, I don't think most people think that about you.

• 1:04:10Speaker 03

  Well, I've been here 21 years.

• 1:04:13Bill Maher?

  I mean... I know from my friends who now, a lot of them are millennials, are moving back to New York and they tell me, they say, LA, it's lovely with the weather and all that stuff, but compared to New York right now, it's so dead. And I think that's probably true.

• 1:04:32Speaker 03

  I think it is.

• 1:04:32Bill Maher?

  I mean, it's your, it's a, what, now, for my age where I'm dug in here, I love it, I do, the weather is the most important thing, I ain't going anywhere. But they do say, you know, any night, if it's 11 o'clock at night and I want to do something and go out, I can call people and they're out and I can go places and they're out, and that is just not LA.

• 1:04:51Speaker 03

  That's not.

• 1:04:51Bill Maher?

  But that's also not my, if I was 40, that would appeal to me.

• 1:04:54Speaker 03

  But you can walk out on the corner and get a cab and go, or now a waymo, and go wherever you want to go.

• 1:04:59Bill Maher?

  Yeah, yeah, no.

• 1:05:00Speaker 03

  In a second.

• 1:05:01Bill Maher?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:02Speaker 03

  LA, it's like, hey, we're going out to dinner and, ah, I'm not going over there.

• 1:05:05Bill Maher?

  But then you have to live in New York with the shitty weather and you have to live in a building. To live in a.

• 1:05:12Speaker 03

  Duck into a little pub, you can go to a little diner like you like.

• 1:05:15Bill Maher?

  This is a little pub. I can, I mean, and that I don't care.

• 1:05:18Speaker 03

  Well, I can't just duck into here. I mean, this is scheduled, I'm cleared with the security, the whole thing, but it doesn't work tomorrow.

• 1:05:24Bill Maher?

  There's no place you can just duck into in LA?

• 1:05:27Speaker 03

  I'm gonna come by tomorrow, Bill. I'm gonna come by tomorrow, we're gonna have a little puff and a little hang.

• 1:05:31Bill Maher?

  Do you, I mean, I had drinks a week ago after the show at the.

• 1:05:36Speaker 03

  Oh, I love that.

• 1:05:37Bill Maher?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:38Speaker 03

  Lot of professionals in there, Bill.

• 1:05:40Bill Maher?

  That, it's so funny.

• 1:05:41Speaker 03

  Lot of hookers in there.

• 1:05:43Bill Maher?

  My, I was with two young ladies who were good friends of mine.

• 1:05:47Speaker 03

  How young?

• 1:05:48Bill Maher?

  They were like, uh, was like, I just want to have a drink, for the show, the week had been a real bear and not the kind Kennedy eats, just a real bear.

• 1:05:56Speaker 03

  Or the kind that shows up at my door.

• 1:05:58Bill Maher?

  I need a fucking drink, you know, let's, where are we going to dinner? I was like, we're not going to dinner, we're gonna drink first. And then they were telling me, yes, I, and I had known this, that that is like, and I was like, oh, I want to see the whores. They were, it was like, it was like, it was like a theme park or like, I want to see the whores. Because I had heard of that, and I've never, I don't normally go there to drink.

• 1:06:19Speaker 03

  The little lobby bar off to the left?

• 1:06:20Bill Maher?

  Yes.

• 1:06:21Speaker 03

  Oh, that's professional.

• 1:06:22Bill Maher?

  But we were there too early, and it was like, there were no whores.

• 1:06:25Speaker 03

  Terrible whore watch.

• 1:06:26Bill Maher?

  It was like when you go to the zoo, and the polar bear won't come out, because he's sleeping inside of his egg loo. It's like, come on, I came all the way to the zoo. Can I not see the fucking polar bear?

• 1:06:38Bill Maher?

  But we had to go to dinner.

• 1:06:40Speaker 03

  Hooker watching is the best. Bill, I grew up in New York City, I'd call my, when I was a little boy, I was probably 12 years old, 14, 13. I'd call my friend in the building, and I'd say, let's sneak out. When the parents would go to sleep, 12:30, we'd go down the elevator, right out on 86th Street, and go up and watch the hookers work. It was fascinating.

• 1:07:02Bill Maher?

  What did you see?

• 1:07:03Speaker 03

  We would just see them with the shorts and the very tight little, you know, short dresses, picking up guys on the street, and we'd just watch them.

• 1:07:09Bill Maher?

  Were you able to?

• 1:07:10Speaker 03

  Ladies of the night, knowing that they were gonna go have sex in a car or something.

• 1:07:13Bill Maher?

  Right, or behind the dumpster.

• 1:07:16Speaker 03

  That's true, yeah.

• 1:07:17Bill Maher?

  Were you able to hear what they were saying to the prospective customer?

• 1:07:22Speaker 03

  Yeah, occasionally, you know, as you got used to it, you could go up and listen to some of the lingo. Buy a dime bag.

• 1:07:27Bill Maher?

  I remember when I used to walk from my...

• 1:07:28Speaker 03

  Shit weed?

• 1:07:30Bill Maher?

  When I used to walk from my shit box apartment on 8th Avenue on 55th Street, down to the Improv, which was the third club in New York when I started, on 44th and 9th. That was the original, like, showcase comedy club. That's Bud Friedman started that in 1962, and that was the theater district. All the other comedy clubs, the Comedy Store, Catch a Rising Star, the Comic Strip, all, they all came...

• 1:07:59Speaker 03

  Bottoms up, belly up, what was it called?

• 1:08:02Bill Maher?

  The Belly Room?

• 1:08:03Speaker 03

  Which is the one done, the belly, the bottom, the...

• 1:08:05Bill Maher?

  The Belly Room is in the Comedy Store, that's for the, that's like, just women in the Belly Room. I'm sure there's something wrong with that, but don't blame me, I didn't invent it.

• 1:08:14Speaker 03

  Interesting.

• 1:08:14Bill Maher?

  But, um, I would walk from 55th down to 44th along 8th Avenue, and that was prime hooker territory. And it was always, again, the...

• 1:08:28Speaker 03

  Rare sightings.

• 1:08:29Bill Maher?

  The naivety of the 22-year-old, like, the first time the hooker was like, you want a date? And I was like, a date?

• 1:08:37Speaker 03

  Where are we going? Frankie and Johnny's?

• 1:08:42Bill Maher?

  You know, a date. Should we go into a duet of something stupid?

• 1:08:47Speaker 03

  It's like what Andrew said to me in the hotel. You want a drink? And there wasn't a drink.

• 1:08:51Bill Maher?

  A date, well, you know, I've got to do a set, but, oh, I see.

• 1:08:55Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 1:08:56Bill Maher?

  You know.

• 1:08:58Speaker 03

  I ate one of those clubs. I interviewed Jerry Seinfeld down there when I was young. It was my most humiliating, like, I was probably a year into the job. And being a New Yorker, I wanted Jerry Seinfeld to like me. I'd say, I mean, I just wanted to be liked by Jerry.

• 1:09:12Bill Maher?

  Who doesn't?

• 1:09:12Speaker 03

  And I appeared like crazy and I just, and I went down to interview Jerry. And it was downstairs in a comedy club.

• 1:09:18Bill Maher?

  The Comedy Cellar.

• 1:09:19Speaker 03

  It started with a B.

• 1:09:20Bill Maher?

  The Comedy Cellar.

• 1:09:21Speaker 03

  Cellar? He was promoting his-

• 1:09:23Bill Maher?

  In Greenwich Village?

• 1:09:24Speaker 03

  Maybe.

• 1:09:25Bill Maher?

  The Comedy Cellar, yes.

• 1:09:26Speaker 03

  Comedy Cellar.

• 1:09:26Bill Maher?

  It's still there and very famous. And it was not there when I first started, but soon after. I did sets at the Comedy Cellar. It was there in the early 80s, so yes, it's been there forever. It's where Chris Rock and Louis CK and lots of guys go when they want to try out material still. And maybe Jerry still, I don't know. But yeah, it's a great club.

• 1:09:47Speaker 03

  It was very, it was, it was his place. He knew everybody. Jerry was wearing a white T-shirt with a sweater over. And I'm wearing a button down shirt, like very thin button down shirt. And so Jerry's clearly warmer than I am. But I'm so nervous and the lights are on and it's two cameras and it's me and Jerry. And I, and I, I'm so prepared and things are going great. And the interview's rolling. And then I start thinking about how it's going great. And this, another voice comes in and I'm so young at the, and then I talk myself out of the fact that it might be going great. And broadcast news occurs.

• 1:10:29Speaker 03

  I'm sitting with Jerry and I start to sweat and a little, it's like the map of Rhode Island appears on my chest and I'm like, and then I'm thinking about it like, no, this can't happen to me. It's going so great. Jerry fucking likes me. This is working. Rhode Island becomes Massachusetts. All of a sudden, we've got New England and fucking Africa just shows up. And Jerry finally goes. Are you gonna be okay? And I just. He loved it and for the rest of the time, he brings it up. Are you gonna be okay?

• 1:11:04Bill Maher?

  Well, I could have saved you all that. I've known Jerry for a very long time. He's one of the greatest humans, you know, obviously, other than comedy, but like I started with a lot of people and know a lot of comics, but. Leno and Seinfeld are the two best humans in the, that I know from the business. But the idea that Jerry Seinfeld would give a shit about whether he liked you or not.

• 1:11:30Speaker 03

  Yeah, exactly.

• 1:11:31Bill Maher?

  Way off.

• 1:11:32Speaker 03

  No.

• 1:11:33Bill Maher?

  He might, but it, but what a, what you.

• 1:11:35Speaker 03

  As a kid growing up in New York.

• 1:11:37Bill Maher?

  Trying to do to make that happen, couldn't make it happen. It would either come for what it was or it wouldn't. And he would not apologize if he didn't like you.

• 1:11:46Speaker 03

  Well, because I sweat so much, he ended up really liking.

• 1:11:49Bill Maher?

  That's great.

• 1:11:50Speaker 03

  And so we became great, you know, and then I forever time and.

• 1:11:53Bill Maher?

  Yeah. So do you still wanna be in the interview game?

• 1:11:58Speaker 03

  Yeah, I mean, I'm doing my podcast is, uh, which you're promoting right now.

• 1:12:01Bill Maher?

  Oh, good.

• 1:12:02Speaker 03

  Hot mics and, you know, we have all kinds of people in, including you, I hope.

• 1:12:07Bill Maher?

  Sure, absolutely.

• 1:12:08Speaker 03

  That would be wonderful. And by the way, Chuck, you're, you know, works in the same building over at Howie Mandel's place.

• 1:12:13Bill Maher?

  Right.

• 1:12:14Speaker 03

  Become great friends with Howie and, um, and he built a whole new studio for us, cause it's going great. And I love that and I love, you know, so we have lots of people in and, uh.

• 1:12:25Bill Maher?

  You think TV.

• 1:12:26Speaker 03

  I'm doing it for myself. We got, you know, sponsors and stuff and it's about the same money as TV.

• 1:12:30Bill Maher?

  Do you think TV?

• 1:12:31Speaker 03

  My money, not yours.

• 1:12:33Bill Maher?

  Is essentially dead. I mean, like, no.

• 1:12:35Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:12:35Bill Maher?

  I mean, obviously it's still thriving because they, I still read every year in May, they have the upfronts, which is Christ, they did that when I was doing sitcoms in the eighties where they sell the. Ad dollars to the people who are advertising on TV and somehow it's still like nine billion dollars.

• 1:12:53Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:12:53Bill Maher?

  Because there's a lot of, lot of people who are still watching CSI and whatever the fuck they got on.

• 1:12:59Speaker 03

  Oh, they're still, they're milking every last bit of it right now. They're putting out new CSI. And NCISs and things.

• 1:13:05Bill Maher?

  And people watch my show on Youtube and lots of other places, but people still have HBO. And, you know, so it's not quite dead yet. But obviously, we saw recently with Colbert and Kimmel. Now, obviously, there was politics involved in that. But there were also shows that were losing money, there's no doubt about that.

• 1:13:24Speaker 03

  Of course.

• 1:13:25Bill Maher?

  There's no doubt that that form, I thought it was anachronistic for years. I mean, the idea that people in this age would like sit there at 11:30 at night and wade through the commercials. And they don't, they watch the clips, you know.

• 1:13:41Speaker 03

  Of course, but I would think that your, the Youtube money that you make on realtime is probably significant. I mean, people watch New Rules, they wanna see your monologue, and so they put it out in 15-minute form. They put it out the whole episode, they put out the shorts. I bet you monetize more than you probably know.

• 1:13:57Bill Maher?

  I'm sure they do, I'm just saying, obviously, this business is changing that and streaming. You know, are the two biggest things. And TV, it's almost like, well, why would you want your job back in TV? Because TV is sort of the past. I mean, I'm gonna hang on to mine as long as I can, but again, it's on different forms. It's, I never worry about the, the way the industry changes, because I'm content. They will, they will always need content. They could beam it from the moon off my ass, they would still need content.

• 1:14:36Bill Maher?

  They have, you know, they just, they're gonna change how they show people shit, but people still just basically wanna watch shit. Because they don't.

• 1:14:46Speaker 03

  You'll go longer than anyone else and most people, and I'll tell you why.

• 1:14:49Bill Maher?

  I already have.

• 1:14:50Speaker 03

  Right, but you are the, you're also like a boutique. It's nice to have in the portfolio. David Zasloff of Warner Brothers loves having Bill Maher in realtime in his portfolio, just like he loved Curb Your Enthusiasm and Larry. And he begged Larry to do another season, because those are like, they give him great pride to have those in there. So, you're, you're good for another 10, I see.

• 1:15:17Speaker 03

  Eighty year old Bill Maher.

• 1:15:18Bill Maher?

  Again, what I'm selling, you can do for a long time, because I'm selling comedy and wisdom. And yeah, you can do that at eighty. Yeah, if I was, you know, Benson Boone, I can't at eighty.

• 1:15:31Speaker 03

  You know Benson Boone?

• 1:15:33Bill Maher?

  I don't know him, but I know he flips onstage, and that's not an eighty year old thing. But what I'm doing could be. I mean, my thing was built for longevity, it's true. Like I said, you don't have that musician thing where you're like, you know, the flavor of the year, and you're just, everyone's just like sucking your jog. But you have longevity that, I mean, very few musicians are relevant past forty. Some past, not past, and athletes, models, they're all done by mid thirties.

• 1:16:02Speaker 03

  That's true. You've been doing this forever.

• 1:16:05Bill Maher?

  Yes, I mean, I only got started in mid thirties, but that's the nature of it. You know, I had a talk show that was gonna go on when I was twenty nine, and they never put it on the air, and they were probably right. It's like, don't send a boy to do a man's job. It's just not the kind of thing you can do without some gravitas. It's not a job for a twenty nine year old.

• 1:16:25Speaker 03

  That's still true.

• 1:16:26Bill Maher?

  You know.

• 1:16:26Speaker 03

  Bill, politically incorrect, I mean, you have it on all there.

• 1:16:29Bill Maher?

  Oh.

• 1:16:30Speaker 03

  I mean, I was on that show way back in the day, I don't know if you remember.

• 1:16:33Bill Maher?

  Oh.

• 1:16:33Speaker 03

  It's on that show, how could you remember?

• 1:16:35Bill Maher?

  Everybody was on that show.

• 1:16:36Speaker 03

  I was on that, and I was on real time. Um, so I've been on your.

• 1:16:41Bill Maher?

  And now here, the trifecta.

• 1:16:43Speaker 03

  I mean, I've got the trifecta. That makes us friends. If you have three hangs, you're friends. That's it.

• 1:16:50Bill Maher?

  I've always.

• 1:16:51Speaker 03

  My friend Bill Maher.

• 1:16:53Bill Maher?

  Loved the way, the show business part of it, if done organically, can lead into friendship. But it has to be organic. It can't be, you can't be the talk show host who's, you know, meets somebody once, and right after the show, can I get your number? You know, you can't be that. It has to happen so that twenty years down the road, when someone sees you in a bar together, and they say, how do you guys know each other? You just go, I don't know.

• 1:17:22Speaker 03

  I don't know.

• 1:17:22Bill Maher?

  You know, I just feel like I always knew him, but yeah, I know I didn't. But somewhere along the way, we just became, and that.

• 1:17:30Speaker 03

  I'd like to be in your mentor program.

• 1:17:32Bill Maher?

  I'd like to meet Andrew. What's your status? Are you married now, or you?

• 1:17:38Speaker 03

  Why?

• 1:17:40Speaker 03

  Andrew and I are quite happy, Bill. We don't have room for you.

• 1:17:45Bill Maher?

  Asking for a friend.

• 1:17:46Speaker 03

  For a friend. I'm a single man. I'm a single man.

• 1:17:50Bill Maher?

  Oh, you are?

• 1:17:50Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:17:51Bill Maher?

  But you were.

• 1:17:51Speaker 03

  I was married for 20 years. Yeah. Great woman, we're still very close. Three great daughters.

• 1:17:57Bill Maher?

  I just heard Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban, 20 years.

• 1:18:01Speaker 03

  I know.

• 1:18:03Bill Maher?

  You say it like you really care. I love the look on your face. I know, I mean, come on.

• 1:18:08Speaker 03

  We, the celebrity community, really suffered a loss.

• 1:18:11Bill Maher?

  I mean, boy, people think there's problems around the world.

• 1:18:13Speaker 03

  I know.

• 1:18:14Bill Maher?

  Middle East and so forth, but what about this? No, I mean, it's sad, but like, it is amusing to me, the way when a couple breaks up, and everywhere in the media sphere, they're all speculating, what could it be? What could it be? You know, was it the, she's, she's on the set with kissing other men? Or is it, it's like, it's always the same thing. They're fucking tired of each other. Humans weren't meant to spend every fucking day together, and they do. And after a while, it's just like, I can't do it anymore. It's not like I don't love you anymore. I do, but I've just seen you too much. And I'm tired of you.

• 1:18:55Speaker 03

  Have you ever heard of the French sex therapist, relationship therapist, Esther Perel? She's a.

• 1:19:03Bill Maher?

  Sounds vaguely familiar.

• 1:19:04Speaker 03

  Yeah. Big, you know, TED Talk on YouTube, millions and millions and millions. I, when I was separated, and wondering, can we put this back together? I booked a $1,200 an hour session. She's probably $15,000 now, this was a while back. But she said to me something interesting. She said, everyone will have two to three great loves in their life.

• 1:19:31Speaker 03

  Some people will choose to have that with the same person. Which I thought was interesting, meaning, you know, 20-year installments would be like a really good run. And I would have loved to have gone on, but I think it just, you change, you become different people, you gotta re-up. So it's like a resigning.

• 1:19:51Bill Maher?

  I mean, that's a very interesting statement to me, having reached this age, because it's almost exactly right in my life, as far as like, someone who was perfect for me.

• 1:20:05Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:20:05Bill Maher?

  I feel like that did come around twice. Roughly 30, 60, and I ain't waiting until 90.

• 1:20:12Speaker 03

  Are you dating now?

• 1:20:13Bill Maher?

  Let's not talk about that.

• 1:20:14Speaker 03

  I wanna know.

• 1:20:15Bill Maher?

  No, I, I didn't talk about that, I'm very happy, very happy. I mean, that's just, I kept it.

• 1:20:22Speaker 03

  I'm happy.

• 1:20:23Bill Maher?

  Yeah, good, I'm happy.

• 1:20:24Speaker 03

  But I could be happier. I'll say that.

• 1:20:26Bill Maher?

  But you're single?

• 1:20:28Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:20:28Bill Maher?

  Oh.

• 1:20:29Speaker 03

  But I think I'm ready for the.

• 1:20:30Bill Maher?

  Let's go to the [BLEEP].

• 1:20:32Speaker 03

  Hey.

• 1:20:35Speaker 03

  I'm gonna say, you know, I've got plans, but I'm available.

• 1:20:39Bill Maher?

  Gonna sue me for this, I mean, it's like, I'm kinda saying that, there's a hotel where you get whores, they may even give me a bonus, I don't know, maybe I'll, maybe I'll get, maybe I'll get, maybe I'll get free drinks.

• 1:20:50Speaker 03

  There are professionals work, escorts working in Los Angeles at all the nice hotels.

• 1:20:55Bill Maher?

  And there should be.

• 1:20:56Speaker 03

  Yes!

• 1:20:57Bill Maher?

  I mean, it's, it.

• 1:20:58Speaker 03

  It's your prerogative, you're traveling, you're a businessman, you're on the road, if that's what you wanna do, that's your right, Bill's a libertarian.

• 1:21:06Bill Maher?

  You don't even have to be traveling or a businessman, you just have to be a human being, who, you know.

• 1:21:12Speaker 03

  You don't have to be.

• 1:21:13Bill Maher?

  You don't, there's a wide range of where we are, as far as, and that's my symbol for a wide range, of where we are on the scale, of, of companionship, I mean, there is like, ultimate true love, great, that's what we're all maybe aiming for, but we fall short sometimes, and there's every, I mean, friends with benefits, I mean, what's that? Is, should we judge that? I don't, I don't think, I don't think we should, but, okay, but it's, it's somewhere on the scale between. Absolute true Abelard and Eloise love. And overhear the whore. That's over here. Well, you don't even like go to a room. Okay, that's over here. That's and then let's call that completely transactional.

• 1:21:54Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 1:21:54Bill Maher?

  Okay. And then there's like maybe the maybe the escort, you know, thing. I I was just watching this wonderful movie. I think it's called Madame X with Jacqueline Bissette and Linda Hamilton. It's terrific. I'd never heard of it. And it's about this magazine writer who goes over to talk to Jacqueline Bissette in Paris. And she runs this sort of agency for escorts. And, you know, Linda Hamilton thinks, oh, this is just a nice way of saying they're a bunch of whores. But no, it's more like courtesans. She's training these women to be sophisticated and they meet these well to do gentlemen. Look, there's an element to that in it, but there's an element to that in life. And they it's just very sophisticated sort of Parisian flavored movie.

• 1:22:39Bill Maher?

  I thought it was terrific and it, you know, gets at something real, which is there is a certain amount of horse trading before we get to absolute true love. And, you know, I don't really think we should judge anybody wherever they are on that journey to it.

• 1:22:55Speaker 03

  But I'll tell you what, I mean, I know some friend, the courtesans, it's an active thing. Los Angeles has a very thriving escort business. It does.

• 1:23:05Bill Maher?

  Have stars ever confided that in you?

• 1:23:07Speaker 03

  No, no, why wouldn't tell me that?

• 1:23:10Bill Maher?

  Right.

• 1:23:11Speaker 03

  Why would you tell me?

• 1:23:11Bill Maher?

  No, that's true. Dumb question.

• 1:23:14Speaker 03

  Dumb question.

• 1:23:14Bill Maher?

  Yeah.

• 1:23:15Speaker 03

  Never.

• 1:23:16Bill Maher?

  So you're single? And you don't you would rather be a married person? That suits your personality?

• 1:23:23Speaker 03

  I will tell you this, I, you know, I've been single for a while, the whole thing had a nice. I would say now. I think a nice, yeah, so I don't want to die alone, Bill. I want a nice partner. And it will be the I won't, but I won't do the one night stand thing. I'm too fucking old for that, by the way. You can't be fifty three hooking up like with people.

• 1:23:44Bill Maher?

  Well, but but can I just comment on one thing? Again, this lovely agree to disagree relationship we have. You are gonna die alone. I promise you when you're dying.

• 1:23:58Speaker 03

  Will someone be holding my hand?

• 1:24:00Bill Maher?

  Yeah, but they're not coming with you.

• 1:24:02Speaker 03

  No.

• 1:24:02Bill Maher?

  You're gonna die alone.

• 1:24:03Speaker 03

  That's true.

• 1:24:04Bill Maher?

  You're gonna die alone. I mean, it would be nice to have a hand. To me, I feel like I'd almost be more upset. And I hopefully will be holding a hand. I mean, I know what hand I'll be holding, I think, but uh.

• 1:24:18Speaker 03

  Mine.

• 1:24:18Bill Maher?

  But I think it would make me even sadder. Because it's like, oh, wow. I do have to let go of you now and um.

• 1:24:27Speaker 03

  Yeah, this is it.

• 1:24:28Bill Maher?

  I'm not gonna see you in three weeks um or ever, but you know. Um, maybe our pets are up in heaven together, you know. I mean, it's um, that's so I I to me. That argument, which I've heard a lot, I've also heard the argument of uh when you get old. Who's gonna feed you the soup when you can't? Like, I don't want someone to feed me the soup. If I'm at that stage, uh I'm not feeling sexy. You know, it's hard to go from feed me the soup to let's get freaky tonight. Um, so I don't I just think if I'm that far gone, I no, I don't, it's like.

• 1:25:03Speaker 03

  I don't want you alone in a room though. See, I've got three daughters, they're gonna be there.

• 1:25:07Bill Maher?

  They're gonna be there.

• 1:25:08Speaker 03

  They're gonna make daughters, they're gonna be there. Sons, if I had them, probably not. But the daughters will be there, Bill.

• 1:25:14Bill Maher?

  Of course they were.

• 1:25:15Speaker 03

  That's gonna be a beautiful thing, all that money I spent on them through the and I'm gonna had, they're gonna usher me out. I was with with my dad when he died and it and you may not believe in God, but I'll tell you what, you believe in something. You believe in energy in the universe or something because.

• 1:25:27Bill Maher?

  I believe there's a universe.

• 1:25:28Speaker 03

  When he left the room, Bill, I was on I was on Instagram or something because he hadn't talked in three hours and he was in the twilight. And.

• 1:25:36Bill Maher?

  Wait, wait, wait, go back. You're you're talking about, this is your father's deathbed?

• 1:25:40Speaker 03

  In twen- two thousand twenty one.

• 1:25:41Bill Maher?

  His his, you're at his deathbed?

• 1:25:43Speaker 03

  I am in his, yeah, it's in Florida, in his bedroom. And and my mom's in the kitchen.

• 1:25:49Bill Maher?

  You knew he was dead.

• 1:25:50Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah, yeah. No, we were in the hospital two days before he had a heart condition where they.

• 1:25:53Bill Maher?

  So they sent him home because.

• 1:25:55Speaker 03

  We're gonna pump his heart full of this fluid, it's probably forty eight hours max.

• 1:25:58Bill Maher?

  Right.

• 1:25:59Speaker 03

  And dad said, or we can keep him going in the ICU.

• 1:26:02Bill Maher?

  No, you wanna die, you wanna die at home. There's a moment, yes.

• 1:26:05Speaker 03

  Bill, talk about a beautiful death. He. He, the nurses, you know, got him in his golf shirt. They combed his hair. Mom, dad, me, the three of us. My brother, his wife is giving birth to a child in Boston, so.

• 1:26:21Bill Maher?

  The cycle of life.

• 1:26:21Speaker 03

  He can't be there. By the way, same name. And they went in and out the same day. Bill, it's getting more religious. And we're sitting in the room and we have a martini toast. Dad has a very small martini, mom, a middle one.

• 1:26:35Bill Maher?

  He was, he was able to even sip a martini?

• 1:26:38Speaker 03

  Yeah, we have a martini toast. And he said to me, I wanna do, you know, I really would like to do one thing with mom that doesn't involve her taking care of me. Like some kind of like a hand of cards or something that I can just. And so mom tried to sit there and play cards with him. We had a martini toast. And the next day, he starts to, to go. And I'm sitting in the room, mom's in the kitchen. And I'm on my phone, cause he hasn't spoken in, you know, three hours. But I'm with him and he's still breathing. And all of a sudden, I feel this tremendous energy lift. And I went, whoo, whoa. It was profound. And I look over and just then, he had died.

• 1:27:21Speaker 03

  His spirit left the room and I felt it all over me. And I went, oh, my God. Mom, he just left. And she comes in and she goes over and holds his hands. Yep, he did. And that was an energy shift I will never forget. So whatever it is, it was powerful. Think about when you leave the room, what a personality.

• 1:27:44Bill Maher?

  Well.

• 1:27:45Speaker 03

  Oof, it's an earthquake.

• 1:27:47Bill Maher?

  Um, you know, the problem is sometimes when you do that, you also fart.

• 1:27:51Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:27:52Bill Maher?

  Uh, and then it's like you're.

• 1:27:54Speaker 03

  Dad would have laughed. He was, he would have laughed.

• 1:27:58Bill Maher?

  The goodness of, you know, being raptured up there, but then the fart. But no, but look, I'm not gonna poo poo that because um, I've known too many people, smart people, intelligent people, not drunk people, not religious people, who have had some experience, not at that moment of death. This is the first I've heard of that, but it, it's the same kind of thing. With um, what can only be called ghosts.

• 1:28:23Speaker 03

  He went somewhere. Cause the shell, it looked different. As soon as that happened, he looked like a hardened shell.

• 1:28:28Bill Maher?

  I don't know what the answer is on that. But I, you know. I'm always in the school of, I don't know. I don't know. I have no dogma- dogmatism about it. I, I don't think it's, uh, Jesus dying on the cross 2,000 years ago has a lot to do with it. But there, uh, is there some sort of energy transference or something, or? I don't know. Again, I've.

• 1:28:51Speaker 03

  All this that's in there, it goes somewhere. This, the shell that you're in is just a shell, but the thing, the bilmar is in there. That, it's an energy and it's going somewhere.

• 1:29:01Bill Maher?

  Or possibly not. That's also possible not, but it's, but again, um, I can't.

• 1:29:08Speaker 03

  Well, I know cause I witnessed it, so I know it for a fact. I mean, I know that you're.

• 1:29:11Bill Maher?

  You know, something happened.

• 1:29:12Speaker 03

  Something majorly happened and I went. And I sat up like I felt it all over me.

• 1:29:18Bill Maher?

  Physically, yeah.

• 1:29:19Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:29:19Bill Maher?

  Yeah, yeah. No, I, I, I'm.

• 1:29:21Speaker 03

  Good testimony, huh?

• 1:29:23Bill Maher?

  You know, I don't know. But nobody knows, but I don't discount the idea that something does go on beyond. I don't know what it would be and, uh, where I fit in and, uh, if there's a bar, um.

• 1:29:41Speaker 03

  You ever done a psilocybin journey?

• 1:29:43Bill Maher?

  Of course.

• 1:29:44Speaker 03

  I just did.

• 1:29:45Bill Maher?

  You talking about mushrooms?

• 1:29:45Speaker 03

  I just did, no, like a real five hour journey with a guide and the whole thing where you see things.

• 1:29:51Bill Maher?

  A fucking guide. I was in college. Who has a guide?

• 1:29:53Speaker 03

  You were at the sphere. You were at the sphere.

• 1:29:55Bill Maher?

  We put them in a blender and ate it.

• 1:29:57Speaker 03

  Okay, that's different. I did that too.

• 1:29:59Bill Maher?

  Tripped our brains out for five hours.

• 1:30:01Speaker 03

  No, I'm talking about a real.

• 1:30:03Bill Maher?

  It's the same thing. It's five hours.

• 1:30:05Speaker 03

  No, I'm talking about a journey.

• 1:30:07Bill Maher?

  A journey? Yeah, it was a journey. It was a laugh journey.

• 1:30:09Speaker 03

  I'm talking about on the ground, blanket, eye, eye mask.

• 1:30:13Bill Maher?

  Were you laughing?

• 1:30:14Speaker 03

  With the music. No.

• 1:30:16Bill Maher?

  Then you weren't on mushrooms.

• 1:30:17Speaker 03

  Yes, I was on psilocybin, sassafras and whatever other mistletoe. This is from Peru.

• 1:30:23Bill Maher?

  Mistletoe?

• 1:30:24Speaker 03

  What? Mistletoe's a real thing.

• 1:30:25Bill Maher?

  Oh, I'm not, I'm not saying.

• 1:30:27Speaker 03

  These are real plants, four capsules and deep down a slide and like off into a five hour journey of the most emotional experience I've ever had. I'm crying, I'm seeing my dad and everyone. I saw you for a minute. I, I mean, it was powerful. It wasn't, you know, shroom the sphere.

• 1:30:46Bill Maher?

  That's a little different, but can I?

• 1:30:48Speaker 03

  But it's healing.

• 1:30:49Bill Maher?

  Can I offer one suggestion?

• 1:30:50Speaker 03

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:30:52Bill Maher?

  I think if Andrew, instead of playing it the way he played, had knocked on your door.

• 1:30:57Speaker 03

  Like a man.

• 1:30:58Bill Maher?

  Like a man.

• 1:30:59Speaker 03

  Not a coward.

• 1:31:00Bill Maher?

  And you opened it, and it's got the crack. Not all that dialogue about drinks and this, which is bullshit that you can smell. If he just said nothing, but unzipped his fly, took his dick out, and held the mistletoe.

• 1:31:16Bill Maher?

  Mistletoe.

• 1:31:17Speaker 03

  It might have worked out differently.

• 1:31:18Bill Maher?

  Over your dick. I mean, to me, that's elegant.

• 1:31:22Speaker 03

  Well, at least it's funny.

• 1:31:22Bill Maher?

  It's clever.

• 1:31:23Speaker 03

  Yeah, he's clever.

• 1:31:24Bill Maher?

  It's clever.

• 1:31:25Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:31:25Bill Maher?

  You're saying, you know what?

• 1:31:26Speaker 03

  It was December, I think, too.

• 1:31:28Bill Maher?

  I'm a straight man. I don't really wanna suck this dick, but that's good.

• 1:31:33Bill Maher?

  Maybe it's me, and maybe I'm missing something.

• 1:31:37Bill Maher?

  Well, I hope you find happiness in the romantic realm.

• 1:31:42Speaker 03

  I believe so.

• 1:31:43Bill Maher?

  Because, as Freud said, you know, there's really only your work and your love life. Those are the two things that determine whether you're happy or not. And, you know, some people are unlucky and they don't have either. Some people get lucky and you have both. I've certainly had times in my life when I've had neither. I've had times in my life when I've had one, times when I've had both. And if you only have one, you're kinda like walking around on one leg.

• 1:32:13Speaker 03

  Right.

• 1:32:14Bill Maher?

  You know?

• 1:32:15Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:32:16Bill Maher?

  Whichever one it is, I've known what it feels like to be like in love, but my career isn't the shitter. Or my career's going-

• 1:32:23Speaker 03

  Has your career ever been in the shitter?

• 1:32:24Bill Maher?

  Of course.

• 1:32:25Speaker 03

  Really?

• 1:32:26Bill Maher?

  Uh, no.

• 1:32:27Speaker 03

  You were out of business for a minute, but then you went right to the new show.

• 1:32:31Bill Maher?

  Okay, well, I started as a comic in the early eighties.

• 1:32:34Speaker 03

  I'm talking about like real, once you're on TV.

• 1:32:36Bill Maher?

  Well, that's my life, so that was very important to me.

• 1:32:39Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 1:32:39Bill Maher?

  Okay, this is the most important part. So, like, when I started, we all wanted to get on a sitcom, come out to California, do The Tonight Show, get on a sitcom. I did all that, exactly as you're supposed to. Got on a sitcom, got on another sitcom, got on another sitcom. But after three sitcoms, that kind of like played itself out. And yes, then I was like wandering in the wilderness for- About five or six years before I got politically incorrect. So that's very common in show business. You have that era where you are just sort of, oh, I thought I was well on my way, but then I wasn't. Even Frank Sinatra had that.

• 1:33:15Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:33:16Bill Maher?

  Remember From Here to Eternity was his comeback movie? Cause he was like the biggest thing in the world and then he couldn't get arrested. He was opening supermarkets. I mean, that, you know, show business is not a steady climb usually.

• 1:33:28Speaker 03

  No.

• 1:33:29Bill Maher?

  I've been very fortunate, yes, since.

• 1:33:30Speaker 03

  Was it your idea politically incorrect?

• 1:33:32Bill Maher?

  Yeah.

• 1:33:32Speaker 03

  You brought it, pitched it.

• 1:33:34Bill Maher?

  Of course.

• 1:33:34Speaker 03

  Right.

• 1:33:37Speaker 03

  That's the move.

• 1:33:38Bill Maher?

  But, you know, I've been, again, like I say, comedy, you don't get the skyrocket to the moon, but it's steady. It's steady and you can work till eighty. Or with AI, who knows? I mean, I could be out doing my show on the moon.

• 1:33:55Bill Maher?

  Hello. I'm AI, Bill Maher.

• 1:33:58Speaker 03

  Beamed off your ass.

• 1:34:00Bill Maher?

  Oh, no.

• 1:34:07Bill Maher?

  Computers are the greatest.

• 1:34:10Bill Maher?

  Imagine if I was pimping for fucking AI and like it was really just the AI me? And I was trying to sell the audience on how great AI was.

• 1:34:19Speaker 03

  Ugh, I hate AI. I don't want it. I want EI.

• 1:34:22Bill Maher?

  And I saw you have one drink.

• 1:34:25Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:34:26Bill Maher?

  That's your limit.

• 1:34:28Speaker 03

  No.

• 1:34:28Bill Maher?

  No. So you drink?

• 1:34:31Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:34:32Bill Maher?

  Okay. But just cause you were mentioning mushrooms.

• 1:34:35Speaker 03

  I like a little of everything. No, The Mushrooms was a, was a, it was a soul searching sort of a real, you know, in place of the therapist.

• 1:34:44Bill Maher?

  Oh, like Aaron.

• 1:34:44Speaker 03

  I fired the therapist as soon as I got back.

• 1:34:46Bill Maher?

  Like Aaron Rodgers and ayahuasca?

• 1:34:47Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 1:34:48Bill Maher?

  Okay, so you had like an hour?

• 1:34:49Speaker 03

  But I don't like the throwing up part. The ayahuasca, this stuff is, I'm not there to purge.

• 1:34:54Bill Maher?

  So what did the mushrooms teach you?

• 1:34:56Speaker 03

  They incredible things. I had a nice connection with my father that I needed because my father was old school. You know, you get married and you work through it and that's it. And you don't ever get divorced and he was really and I had I never the guilt and the shame that I carried from from the divorce was very much.

• 1:35:18Bill Maher?

  What do you have guilty?

• 1:35:19Speaker 03

  From my beloved dad, who I love, a wonderful man of morals and integrity.

• 1:35:23Bill Maher?

  Why are you guilty about it? What are you shameful?

• 1:35:24Speaker 03

  I just feel like, ah, you know, I should. Dad, you don't it's hard to explain, but the old man was such a great guy. And I just felt like I wish I could have pleased him.

• 1:35:35Bill Maher?

  That doesn't explain why you felt bad about getting divorced. I mean, things happen in life.

• 1:35:40Speaker 03

  That's true.

• 1:35:40Bill Maher?

  People change, love dies. It's unfortunate. It doesn't have to, but.

• 1:35:45Speaker 03

  Yeah, but for him, he was so disappointed. And when you see your old man who loves you so much disappointed, it's hard. And he was sad about it.

• 1:35:51Bill Maher?

  So.

• 1:35:52Speaker 03

  Let's see it.

• 1:35:52Bill Maher?

  But I always want to ask people, but what's so what? OK, so I'm a bad guy because I was married for 20 years.

• 1:35:59Speaker 03

  Well, I'm not a bad guy.

• 1:36:00Bill Maher?

  No, no, I'm just hypothetically. I'm saying I'm not saying me either. I was never married, but like this is how people think like, ah, because society makes you think this way. I'm a bad guy because I was married for 20 years and then, OK, I dumped my wife. Oh, my God. And I even got with a younger woman, maybe this is you're just the worst person in the world. OK, granted, worst person in the world. My question, as opposed to what? I'm not happy. We're in a dead relationship, but I should just suck it up for the rest of my life? That's your alternative? Just suck it up because that's bad? So I don't.

• 1:36:38Speaker 03

  I agree with that. I agree with that. But for me, it was, you know what it was? It was letting go of everything in the past. What the journey did for me, what this psilocybin journey did was. Everything is two feet in the future. There's just, don't spend a minute on the old stories or the old things that you tell yourself.

• 1:37:00Bill Maher?

  Right.

• 1:37:00Speaker 03

  Fucking let them all go and keep two feet in the future. And that is what I came out of it with and, phew. That's it. Fired that therapist right away, because what, I give him 400 bucks a week and we have the same conversation?

• 1:37:15Bill Maher?

  You fired who?

• 1:37:16Speaker 03

  My therapist, the psychiatrist. I would go and sit on the couch like this.

• 1:37:20Bill Maher?

  Sir.

• 1:37:21Speaker 03

  And I fired him and I said, you know what, we're having the same conversation every week and I pay you the same and I don't want to see you next week and have the same conversation, so.

• 1:37:28Bill Maher?

  Yeah, I could have told you that.

• 1:37:30Speaker 03

  I had the answers.

• 1:37:31Bill Maher?

  Oh, of course.

• 1:37:32Speaker 03

  I had them. Just needed to get over the wall, Bill, the scarred tissue.

• 1:37:36Bill Maher?

  I mean, I'm not saying therapy doesn't help some people and it's valid sometimes. But, I mean, for somebody like you.

• 1:37:44Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:37:45Bill Maher?

  To me, this was always just bullshit. I mean, you don't need a fucking therapist. And also, the idea that mushrooms did a better job in therapy, I kind of love.

• 1:37:56Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:37:58Bill Maher?

  I kind of love that.

• 1:37:59Speaker 03

  Bill, I'm going back, I'm doing it again.

• 1:38:01Bill Maher?

  Doing what?

• 1:38:02Speaker 03

  This is another, another journey and I.

• 1:38:04Bill Maher?

  Oh.

• 1:38:04Speaker 03

  I love it. It's the most, you access emotions you have in you. But you can't get them just in it.

• 1:38:13Bill Maher?

  Okay, but, but this is very interesting to me because I've done mushrooms many, many times. But this was not the experience. The experience of mushrooms, and not just me, everybody, when I did them, was you just laugh your ass off. So they must be doing something different with the mushrooms, adding something to it that makes it much more of this introspective experience.

• 1:38:34Speaker 03

  Yes.

• 1:38:34Bill Maher?

  Because for me, the mushroom experience, it wasn't introspective in that way. What was different than every other drug was every other drug makes me horny and mushrooms made me think about sex and go.

• 1:38:49Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:38:50Bill Maher?

  Why would I put a part of my body

• 1:38:52Speaker 03

  Yeah, it's true.

• 1:38:53Bill Maher?

  Inside a part of your body? That was like the funniest, most ridiculous thing in the world. I'm gonna put this thing and it's gonna get bigger? First of all, that was 10 minutes of laughing.

• 1:39:04Speaker 03

  And?

• 1:39:05Bill Maher?

  And then I'm gonna put it in you? In you? Like you're another person? I'm gonna put something?

• 1:39:10Speaker 03

  This date is over.

• 1:39:12Bill Maher?

  This is a crazy idea, that a part of me goes in a part of you. What are we, Legos? You know? And, and that's what mushrooms did to my mind.

• 1:39:22Speaker 03

  Yeah, but you didn't do the journey. You ate, you ate a little, you ate some caps and stems and you did that. These are capsules of, you know, um, plant medicine from Peru.

• 1:39:34Bill Maher?

  This is just a harder version.

• 1:39:35Speaker 03

  And you, two capsules, a walk in the garden with these people at their home. They're both in their 70s. They've been doing this for 20 years. They're incredible people. All stemming from a conversation I had on an airplane with a guy who was a big private equity guy. And he's like, I don't drink, I don't smoke, but I'll tell you what. Psilocybin saves the world. I said, we talked for two hours straight. I go to these people that he sets me up with. We, two capsules, walk in the garden, come back. I said, I'm feeling something. And she said, okay, two more capsules. And I'm gonna lay you down right here, blanket, eye mask, music. And I'm sitting there going, I'm gonna tell her I need more. It's not working. We've all done this with edibles, right? And then?

• 1:40:19Bill Maher?

  Exactly.

• 1:40:22Speaker 03

  Down a slide, off the end of the slide, and I'm floating in this journey. Bill, I see everybody. I see my mom and dad's relationship. I see my daughters. I see my ex-wife. I see my brother and I see, you know, what he wanted as a little boy and he didn't get the attention and the... All the little traumas get addressed and I see everybody I wanna see and I feel and I understand and everything goes in its place. It's over. The music is playing and the journey follows the music. And I take the mask off when it's over and I say, how long was I down? Thinking it was an hour. He said, five hours. And I went...

• 1:41:04Speaker 03

  Wow, um, I think you might have really set me on the right path. I, I, I did not want to leave. It was incredible.

• 1:41:12Bill Maher?

  You saw all these people from your family, like, in the past?

• 1:41:15Speaker 03

  In present and past. My dad, my mom, I saw their relationship. I understood their marriage better.

• 1:41:22Bill Maher?

  Can you tell W not to go to Iraq?

• 1:41:24Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:41:25Bill Maher?

  No, I'm kidding. Um, okay, so...

• 1:41:28Speaker 03

  He's not gonna do your show.

• 1:41:29Bill Maher?

  Oh.

• 1:41:30Speaker 03

  He just texted me.

• 1:41:31Bill Maher?

  You know what? I've also...

• 1:41:32Speaker 03

  He said Bill was doing great until then.

• 1:41:35Bill Maher?

  I've also said, in the spirit of, like, keeping a completely open mind, there, there is every chance, I would even bet on it, that in 20 years, or 10, or 5, I don't know, somebody will put out an article talking about how smart it was to go into Iraq. Because one thing you can always count on is revisionism.

• 1:41:55Speaker 03

  Totally.

• 1:41:56Bill Maher?

  I'm not there yet, but you know, the Middle East is a very fraught, weird, dangerous place where the world could end for a number of different reasons. And it's fucked up in a lot of ways. And, you know, again, I wasn't for it, uh, but we don't know what the future will hold and how it will make things in the past.

• 1:42:17Speaker 03

  We don't know what the balance will be?

• 1:42:19Bill Maher?

  I mean, it was a very Texas reaction. You know, it was like, "They kicked us ass, kicked our ass, we're gonna kick their ass."

• 1:42:26Speaker 03

  Somebody's ass is getting kicked.

• 1:42:28Bill Maher?

  War. Where? I don't know, I'm not a detail guy.

• 1:42:33Bill Maher?

  You figure out where.

• 1:42:34Speaker 03

  Nah, you know, he would, uh...

• 1:42:35Bill Maher?

  It was the wrong country. It was a country that did not attack us, but let's not get into that.

• 1:42:41Speaker 03

  No, let's get into that. That would be really fun.

• 1:42:43Bill Maher?

  Iraq did not attack us. That's why it was crazy. It was like, it was like...

• 1:42:47Speaker 03

  Did you see the pitch at Yankee Stadium? Did you see that pitch?

• 1:42:51Bill Maher?

  Did you see...

• 1:42:52Speaker 03

  Country comes together on a pitch, one pitch.

• 1:42:55Bill Maher?

  And he can pitch.

• 1:42:56Speaker 03

  He could pitch.

• 1:42:57Bill Maher?

  I could do that, too. I saw.

• 1:42:58Speaker 03

  What a moment.

• 1:42:59Bill Maher?

  I saw Fifty Cent pitching again.

• 1:43:01Speaker 03

  Oh, my god.

• 1:43:01Bill Maher?

  He's the worst.

• 1:43:02Speaker 03

  Terrible.

• 1:43:03Bill Maher?

  Terrible.

• 1:43:03Speaker 03

  The Cubs game.

• 1:43:04Bill Maher?

  Well, there was one he did like five years ago that was just way beyond embarrassing. And then he did one that was just better, but still awful. I could pitch. I could throw a ball to the home plate. I'm not saying I can get batters out, but it would look like a major league pitch.

• 1:43:19Speaker 03

  Can you throw like a?

• 1:43:20Bill Maher?

  Oh, fuck, yes.

• 1:43:21Speaker 03

  Yeah, you can throw like a, like a man?

• 1:43:22Bill Maher?

  I mean, I was, Aaron Rodgers was here. We went out here.

• 1:43:26Speaker 03

  You and Aaron?

• 1:43:26Bill Maher?

  Yeah, out the door after the show. And I picked, there's this fruit tree out here and they're not, I don't know even what that fruit is, but it's hard as a fucking rock. You couldn't eat it even if you wanted to. And there was a tree, it's like, like fifty yards down. And like, I'm always, whenever we walk up there, I always say to my girl, I can hit, I can fucking hit that tree from. And it's a, it's a long way and a, a hard piece of fruit, and I dead center it every time.

• 1:43:52Speaker 03

  And you did it for Aaron Rodgers?

• 1:43:54Bill Maher?

  Yes.

• 1:43:55Speaker 03

  Earned his respect. Probably had it before. Are you a Giants fan because of Jersey?

• 1:44:00Bill Maher?

  Totally.

• 1:44:00Speaker 03

  Me, too.

• 1:44:01Bill Maher?

  Never stopped.

• 1:44:02Speaker 03

  Jackson Dart. No, me neither.

• 1:44:04Bill Maher?

  Well, let's wait. It's one game.

• 1:44:06Speaker 03

  Malik Neighbors is gone. We're in trouble there. That's a terrible thing. As Dart gets going, Neighbors goes out.

• 1:44:12Bill Maher?

  I mean, I, you know, I was a Mets owner for ten years, right?

• 1:44:15Speaker 03

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:44:16Bill Maher?

  I was a minority owner of the Mets. I mean.

• 1:44:17Speaker 03

  You know, my great uncle owned the Mets.

• 1:44:19Bill Maher?

  Who was that? Wilpon?

• 1:44:21Speaker 03

  No, sold it to Wilpon and Double Day.

• 1:44:23Bill Maher?

  Double Day? Is your uncle?

• 1:44:24Speaker 03

  No. G H Walker owned them and sold the Mets to Double Day.

• 1:44:30Bill Maher?

  Oh, is that right?

• 1:44:30Speaker 03

  I mean, he was great, great uncle, so I didn't know him, but.

• 1:44:34Bill Maher?

  Do you have any money from the Bush family?

• 1:44:36Speaker 03

  You know, no, but the, uh. Can you give me some? You have a very, I'd like you to cut me a check. Just a little bridge. A little bridge, Bill.

• 1:44:44Bill Maher?

  You're doing fine.

• 1:44:46Speaker 03

  I'm okay.

• 1:44:46Bill Maher?

  Yeah. No, I, I.

• 1:44:48Speaker 03

  You know, that's funny. People think the Bushes are rich, you know? Hmm, it's the, it's the speech givers, you know, that were president that have a lot of dough.

• 1:44:56Bill Maher?

  Yeah, they're not.

• 1:44:56Speaker 03

  Not really rich.

• 1:44:57Bill Maher?

  They're not like the Kennedys.

• 1:44:58Speaker 03

  No.

• 1:44:58Bill Maher?

  Right? No, they never were.

• 1:45:00Speaker 03

  I made more money than my father for years when I was on a roll.

• 1:45:04Bill Maher?

  Yeah, there's no industry you can think of that's associated with the, with the Bushes, right? I mean, it's like, the Kennedys, Joe, Joe was famously a bootlegger. And then they own Marshall Fields in Chicago.

• 1:45:16Speaker 03

  Yeah, there's no Bush family. There's no like railroad or it's not that kind of like, you know? I mean, H W did a little oil and George W did a little oil and then they. But not big time Hunt, Family Oil, or Boone.

• 1:45:29Bill Maher?

  Do you have any sort of, uh, sort of simpatico relationship with any other like nepo political babies like RFK?

• 1:45:37Speaker 03

  Chris Cuomo, I like a lot. He and I, Cuomo and I talk, we talk Daily Stoic.

• 1:45:41Bill Maher?

  Really?

• 1:45:42Speaker 03

  We're both Stoics. We, I text with him all the time. He'll text me, where have you been?

• 1:45:46Bill Maher?

  Wait, Stoics?

• 1:45:47Speaker 03

  Stoic, well, we read the Daily Stoic. We read Stoic philosophy. We...

• 1:45:51Bill Maher?

  Really?

• 1:45:52Speaker 03

  Yeah. He wanted to start a group. I really like Cuomo, cause he's got a lot of fight in him.

• 1:45:57Bill Maher?

  Oh, I love him. What, what Stoic philosophy, meaning, I mean, a Stoic, when people think of Stoic, they mean...

• 1:46:03Speaker 03

  Marcus Aurelius, Seneca, Epictetus.

• 1:46:06Bill Maher?

  Yeah, right. I'm sure everyone's real familiar with their shit, but, um...

• 1:46:10Speaker 03

  Well, they're familiar with the tenet, the basic tenet.

• 1:46:12Bill Maher?

  Yes, so...

• 1:46:13Speaker 03

  You cannot control what happens to you. You can only control how you react to that.

• 1:46:19Bill Maher?

  And Stoicism would say by not reacting at all. I mean, Stoicism is like, no, when you say someone is Stoic, it's like you're getting nothing from them.

• 1:46:30Speaker 03

  You know, also is non-reactionary, Scientology, just letting you know.

• 1:46:34Bill Maher?

  But, I mean, that's what you want to be, a Stoic?

• 1:46:37Speaker 03

  You want, yeah, you want to be able to just, like you are. You are a natural Stoic. You said it earlier. You don't ride the highs too high and you don't ride the lows too low. You kind of try and stay in the middle. That's basically Stoic.

• 1:46:49Bill Maher?

  Really?

• 1:46:50Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:46:50Bill Maher?

  Oh. I thought it was...

• 1:46:52Speaker 03

  Don't react to things that are gonna, you're not gonna give a shit about in two days.

• 1:46:56Bill Maher?

  That's so true.

• 1:46:57Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 1:46:58Bill Maher?

  Right. Like this show.

• 1:47:00Speaker 03

  Yeah, like who cares?

• 1:47:02Bill Maher?

  I gotta go back to, I gotta get back to my day job.

• 1:47:05Speaker 03

  You gotta take a leak.

• 1:47:07Bill Maher?

  That would help you.

• 1:47:08Speaker 03

  So do I. We're old guys. We're gonna take a leak.

• 1:47:10Bill Maher?

  Good time.

• 1:47:11Speaker 03

  Me too. Thank you.

• 1:47:12Bill Maher?

  Uh, all right. So our friendship will progress...

• 1:47:15Speaker 03

  There's only one step. The next step is you know where.

• 1:47:17Bill Maher?

  Organically.

• 1:47:18Speaker 03

  Organically, not, don't, yeah, don't force yourself on me.

• 1:47:27Bill Maher?

  I'm not saying where I'm going Friday night. I'm just saying if I see you there, act like you don't know me.

• 1:47:33Speaker 03

  We'll assimilate.

• 1:47:38Speaker 01

  Now at Kroger, your points add up to more ways to save every trip. Use them your way to take dollars off groceries at checkout or save at the pump. You can even save up to $35 on your next fill-up. Same points, more choices. And with low prices on fresh, quality food, plus digital and personalized offers tailored to how you shop, your dollar goes further. Redeem your points online or in the app. Kroger, fresh for everyone. Restrictions apply. See site or store for details.

• 1:48:08Speaker 06

  At Humana, our Medicare Advantage plans are easy to understand and easy on your wallet, like offering more benefits than you'd get from original Medicare alone, and including dental, vision, and hearing coverage in every plan. And the best part is, every plan has a $0 or low monthly plan premium, which makes it easier to save, too. So this Medicare planning season, plan well with Humana. Learn more at gethumana.com. Humana is a Medicare Advantage, HMO, and PPO organization with a Medicare contract. Enrollment in any Humana plan depends on contract renewal. Network freedom and flexibility, that's what you want in a healthcare plan. With a Humana Medicare Advantage PPO plan, you can see any doctor in the country who accepts Medicare, including specialists. No referrals, no kidding.

• 1:48:52Speaker 06

  Learn more at gethumana.com. See any doctor who accepts Medicare and is willing to bill Humana. Humana PPOs may not be available in all areas. Benefits and costs share may vary. Humana is a Medicare Advantage PPO organization with a Medicare contract. Enrollment in any Humana plan depends on contract renewal.