My Most Powerful Episode Ever - Ed Mylett in the Hot Seat, Interviewed by Jamie Kern Lima

This is THE most emotional conversation of my lifetime... We have flipped the script this week. I’ve asked one of my truly dearest friends, Jamie Kern Lima, to GUEST HOST the show and interview ME about my highly anticipated new book, THE POWER OF ONE MORE, coming out June 1. (You can pre-order now). As you might guess, Jamie knows me really well, so not only am I fielding some questions that only Jamie knows to ask, I’m also going to REVEAL things I’ve never told anyone before, publicly or privately. Nothing was off the table! Jamie and I are going to give you a big sneak peek on some of the things you’ll read in my new book, THE POWER OF ONE MORE, coming out of June 1. I WROTE THIS BOOK TO HONOR MY DAD. He was a KIND AND LOVING MAN who battled alcohol addiction early in my life. Throughout the years, my dad became the person who had the most profound influence on my life. After he beat his addiction, for 35 years, HE TAUGHT ME LESSONS, many of which are in the book… lessons that I still use to this day. I wasn’t expecting her to ask me about what I struggled with the most growing up. I had to think about it and like a lot of people I know, I had to fight through so many kinds of CONSTANT FEAR. Fear I wouldn’t fit in. Fear that I wasn’t good enough. Fear that I’d be found out as an imposter. Fear my dad would get hurt while he was drinking, or God forbid, he would accidentally hurt someone else. I’m also going to tell you how I’ve leveraged a life full of ONE MORES to become successful. I’m especially grateful to Jamie for asking me about HOW MY DAD SPENT HIS LAST DAYS and what I learned after he passed that had a huge impact on me. I hope there are no rules about shedding a few tears on your own show because I definitely broke them... Let’s just say when I get to the end of my life, I’m praying that I turn out to be half the man my father was. This week’s guest host unpacked a lot in the 90 minutes we spent together. THANK YOU, JAMIE… my friend who got me to say things I never thought I would. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Ed Mylett?

  I hear so many small business owners say the exact same thing. They just never have enough time in the day. Well, I measure time differently. I've compressed, condensed, heck, I've bent time. My first day is 6:00 a.m. to noon. My second day starts at noon and goes till 6:00 p.m. And my third day, 6:00 p.m. to midnight. I now get 21 days a week. Stack that up over a month, over a year, over five years, and my life's completely different than it would have been otherwise. And if you want to win as an entrepreneur, you have to compress your time, too. And you definitely can't afford to waste it. Waiting weeks on a big bank for capital? Your best bet's to work with my friends at Cardiff. They know how to compress time for entrepreneurs. They get your business approved in minutes and funded the very same day. They're America's favorite small business lender, and for good reason.

• 0:45Ed Mylett?

  Over 20 years in business, over $12 billion deployed to small business across America. Stop letting bank delays slow down your momentum. Head to cardiff.co/ed. That's cardiff.co/ed. Cardiff.co. Real growth, fast funding. Cardiff. Borrow better.

• 1:01Speaker 01

  Mr. President, my company, for me, of the explosion on our rig.

• 1:05Speaker 02

  On October 2nd.

• 1:06Speaker 01

  Causing massive water displacement and triggering a tsunami. They all heap the blame on me.

• 1:11Speaker 02

  Tom Cruise is. Digger got us into this mess. And Digger's gonna dig us up. From the director of Birdman and The Revenant.

• 1:18Speaker 01

  What would happen if I stopped drilling? You stop, you freeze to death, that's what.

• 1:22Speaker 02

  With great power comes great deniability.

• 1:25Speaker 01

  I'm not the first nanny.

• 1:27Speaker 02

  Digger. See the trailer online. Only in theaters October 2nd. Rated R. Under 17. Not a minute without parent.

• 1:36Speaker 02

  This is The Ed Mileage Show.

• 1:40Ed Mylett?

  Hey, everybody. Welcome back to the show. This week, plot twist. We're turning the tables on me. And I'm being interviewed by my dear friend, Jamie Kern Lima, about my new book, The Power of One More. And I say some things in this interview that I've never said before, publicly or privately, in my life. It was a deeply emotional, very revealing interview for me. And I'm sure that it will be for you as well. So, enjoy. God bless you.

• 2:07Jamie Kern Lima?

  Ed Mylett.

• 2:08Ed Mylett?

  Jamie.

• 2:09Jamie Kern Lima?

  It is such an honor to interview you on your show. This has never been done before.

• 2:15Ed Mylett?

  Nope.

• 2:16Jamie Kern Lima?

  You in the hot seat.

• 2:17Ed Mylett?

  Yeah.

• 2:17Jamie Kern Lima?

  We're flipping the script. And are you ready?

• 2:20Ed Mylett?

  I'm ready. I feel like I'm in great hands with my dear friend here. So let's do this.

• 2:24Jamie Kern Lima?

  All right. Well, I just want to, from the beginning, reconfirm nothing's off, like, nothing's off limits, right?

• 2:30Ed Mylett?

  You've asked me that so many times.

• 2:32Jamie Kern Lima?

  No questions are off the table.

• 2:33Ed Mylett?

  You can ask me anything you want. I'm an open book today.

• 2:36Jamie Kern Lima?

  You're an open book.

• 2:37Ed Mylett?

  Yeah. With you, I am.

• 2:39Jamie Kern Lima?

  Aw, thank you. I want to also just share, you haven't seen the questions before? You have no idea what's coming?

• 2:44Ed Mylett?

  I have no clue what you're gonna ask me, but I'm certainly excited about it, I think.

• 2:48Jamie Kern Lima?

  You ready?

• 2:49Ed Mylett?

  I'm ready. Let's go.

• 2:50Jamie Kern Lima?

  All right. Well, first off, I just want to say, I have had the gift of reading the first draft of the manuscript of The Power of One More. Congratulations.

• 3:00Ed Mylett?

  Thank you.

• 3:00Jamie Kern Lima?

  It is such a good book. And I feel like, you know, when I was reading it, I laughed, I cried, I bawled my eyes out. I sat there and read things, and I thought to myself, they do not teach you this in school. Like, there's so much in there that they just don't teach you in school, whether you're a business leader, or leading a team, or trying to learn how to be persuasive, or just trying to live your best life.

• 3:23Ed Mylett?

  Thank you.

• 3:23Jamie Kern Lima?

  So just right off the bat, I want to hear it in your words. What is The Power of One More? Why did you write this book? Who's it for?

• 3:32Ed Mylett?

  Well, the first person I sent it to was you, of anybody in the world. So that should say something. The fact that you like it means a lot to me. So I wrote it after my dad died. So my dad passed away, and I realized a couple of things. One, I learned a lot of lessons from my dad, most of which were what I wanted to do in my life. And I wanted to write them to honor my dad, because most of them I took from him. The second part of it was, it occurred to me that, you know, when you watch someone you love pass away, especially a parent, you know, it sort of dawns on you that you ultimately are next. And, you know, that it made me really think about the end of my life. And... You know, what do I want my life to be like? What do I want to have accomplished? Where do I want to have gone? What difference do I want to make?

• 4:16Ed Mylett?

  What emotions do I want to have? And then also, like, what do I know about life so far? Because the older I get, the more I realize I don't know as much as I used to think I know. But there are certain things I've definitely discovered in my life that have helped me become more successful and happier. And I wanted to document them, you know, before I forgot them. And so I decided to go about writing a real manuscript, a thorough manuscript. I call it, you know, the ultimate guide to being either successful or happy. And those two things are sort of interchangeable, but it was emotional writing it. And I learned some things about myself and my dad as I wrote it. Some things dawned on me as I was writing it. Nope, that was from dad too. That was from dad as well. And so I'm proud of it. I'm proud of the book. There's obviously things you always wish you could do better or differently, but as I've told you.

• 5:01Ed Mylett?

  But I do believe this book will help people become happier and more successful, for sure.

• 5:06Jamie Kern Lima?

  You know, I was gonna ask you, hearing that, you know, writing a book is such a journey, right? I bet you a lot of people listening to us right now or watching have started the first page of their book, or maybe they haven't yet, or they want to. And, you know, on your journey, I was gonna ask you that right off the bat, is what have you learned about yourself in this process? Because this book is deep. I mean, it's like great business and leadership lessons, but the personal stuff and the layers are really deep, so.

• 5:34Ed Mylett?

  I think that, that's a great question. And you and I discussed this a little bit last night, just as we were talking about this. But I think it's dawning on me more and more the impact that my dad's drinking had on me in my life, even to this day. As I was writing the book, you know, just when you grow up with any dysfunction in your family. By the way, I grew up in a very loving family, a tremendous family. I'm very proud of my family. But that doesn't mean it didn't come without, you know, some dysfunction. And a lot of people come from dysfunction. It could be alcohol or drug abuse. It could be divorce. It could be bankruptcy. It could be they didn't tell you they loved you enough. One huge form of child neglect that I realized in writing the book is a parent who doesn't pursue their dreams. You're neglecting your children when you do that.

• 6:18Ed Mylett?

  You're neglecting your children when you don't pursue your potential and your dreams. You're installing in them that it's okay not to become the best version of you. And they, a lot of things in life are caught, not taught. And what I realized when I was writing the book is I caught a lot of things from my dad that he didn't necessarily intentionally teach me. But I do think as I read it, it dawned on me more and more that these things that happen when we're children, good, bad, or indifferent, do impact us as we get older. Even when the world thinks we've got it all together. Even when the world thinks, you know, "Man, that guy's got everything," or "She's got everything," people think that sometimes of you or myself. And I realized that, no, there are, there are, there's impact and effect and ramifications

• 7:03Ed Mylett?

  from things that happen when we're young and when we're children that we carry with us even into adulthood. And it certainly uncovered some of those things about myself in the book, writing it.

• 7:11Jamie Kern Lima?

  What you just said is huge. I have never heard anyone say that before. And I just, would you mind saying that again? Because usually, and I, my own experience and so many other people, we're like, "Oh, do I, you know, am I too ambitious? Am I, you know, do I put everything on hold for my kids?" A lot of times, people think as parents, you know, are we going after things too much, right? And we dial it back. And you're saying, you're saying not going after your dreams.

• 7:36Ed Mylett?

  I think absolutely, that's a fact. I think it's the most insidious form of neglect of a child.

• 7:41Jamie Kern Lima?

  Woo!

• 7:41Ed Mylett?

  Is the, uh, it's an, and it's-

• 7:43Jamie Kern Lima?

  Coming in hot! Coming in hot, admire that.

• 7:45Ed Mylett?

  And I, I've, I've really, I strongly, I really believe that strongly now, too, because there's something that happens to our spirit when we know we're not becoming who we're supposed to be. And that's, that, that thing that's happening to our spirit, that in and of itself robs us of our ability to even love people to the extent that we can, to express ourselves, to give them the energy that we're capable of giving. And so, yeah, I think that a lot of people think that, "Well, I know, I came from a great and loving family. That's wonderful, that's terrific." But was there anything in there where, you know, you look now at their lives and, even as my dad got older, I'm so proud of my dad and the different things he accomplished. But there were even times later in life, he goes, "You know..." This little spot there, I wish I'd have taken a bigger risk. I wish I'd have gone for it. I wished I'd have just tried a couple of different things. And he would impart those lessons on to me.

• 8:30Ed Mylett?

  Now, he was such a humble person that, as you know, we'll talk about later, when he passed away, I found out the just massive difference my dad was making every day in people's lives that I had no idea that he had done. But I think anybody listening to this or watching it ought to really think through. You love your family. It's really easy to say, "Hey sweetheart, you can be anything you want to be." But there's a point in most children's lives where they wonder, "Well, why aren't you?" And at some point, all of us, true, like, I figured out who my dad is in writing this book, right? I figured, you know, at some point in my adulthood, I figured out who he was, who my mother was. My mother's just, my mother's the lost person. She's this beautiful person who literally held our family together when it wasn't, you know, almost capable of being held together.

• 9:15Ed Mylett?

  But I have to tell you, all children eventually figure out who their parents are in the world. You're gonna love your parents, but there's an age where you figure out, "Who are they? What difference have they made? What have they achieved? What have they given? You know, what's their role in the world?" And so, all of your children are gonna eventually figure that out anyway. So you might as well go for your dreams now. And there's another notion, I'll just say lastly, this notion that, "Well, if I'm really crushing it at work, I'm gonna be neglecting my family." Or if I'm really, if I'm at the gym, that's gonna take from work. The truth is, I talk about this in the book, about, you know, extremity expands capacity. And the truth is that nothing's further, that's absolutely not true. For me, when I'm crushing it at work, I'm a better dad.

• 9:56Ed Mylett?

  When I'm a great father, I bring more love and compassion and joy and energy to work. When I'm fit and training and eating great, that magnifies positively all the other areas. There's this fallacy that if you have a lot of one, you must have less of the other. And that's just not true.

• 10:14Jamie Kern Lima?

  I'm preparing for today. I am not taking a second of everyone listening and their precious time for granted. And I have, you don't know this, but I've reached out to a number of your close friends, asking them, "What would you ask Ed?"

• 10:26Ed Mylett?

  Oh, no.

• 10:27Jamie Kern Lima?

  I have reached out and a lot of people on Instagram DMing me questions for you. And you know, this was gonna come later, but I just wanna throw this out there, cuz it's something that you just shared. So, a lot of your community sending me questions, right? So, @eclipseholstersasked, and I wanna share this, cuz it piggybacks on something you just shared. "How do you handle your family that doesn't necessarily want you to succeed, cuz they're more comfortable if you stay stuck and poor, like them? How do you walk in your success and enjoy it?" And so, I think that's interesting, cuz you're saying your kids will figure out who you are and really, really go for it. And a lot of people are struggling, cuz maybe their parents, their loved ones, their friends

• 11:10Jamie Kern Lima?

  and family actually kinda prefer if they just stay stuck.

• 11:13Ed Mylett?

  Yeah. Mine did. Mine did. And you know, I could tell you on the other side of it, they loved me. They were, most of the time, they truly love you. They're very concerned about you. And let's be honest, if you're an entrepreneur, there's a lot of struggle. And most parents don't wanna see their children hurt. They don't wanna see you go through difficult times. Then there's the other part of it with like, "Oh, you're, you know, you're all after the money thing," or you know, "What's important is family." And what they fail to understand because of their own limiting beliefs. Here's what's gonna happen in your life. People with limiting beliefs are gonna be projecting onto you their belief systems over and over and over and again. And as long as you are aware that that's what's happening, that it's not probably, look, there's probably some folks in your family that are antagonistic against you, but the vast majority love you. They love you.

• 11:57Ed Mylett?

  They're projecting onto you their limiting belief systems. Here's what I can tell you, that I know for a fact, that when you win, and you know, I talk a lot about this in the book, the second chapters about the matrix, and I talk about Neo, and Neo in the matrix is the one. And you know that I'm well-known for saying that, you know, that you can become the one in your family that changes the happiness and success of them. Cuz in every family that you see that's wealthy or just happy... At some point in their lineage, way, way back, they weren't. And then the one shows up, the Neo, the Jamie in that family shows up. And here's what I can tell you, having been a person who sort of has been the one, is that you actually change the way they think eventually. And that my family now embraces bigger thinking.

• 12:42Ed Mylett?

  My family now embraces chasing dreams and maximizing your potential. It took awhile, took a couple decades, but that type of talk will not happen in my family again. And so the fact that that's happening to you and your family makes it even more requisite upon you to go do something great so that that legacy of limiting thinking and small thinking and playing life small and settling for, listen, it's not just good enough to be a good person in life. You're supposed to contribute, you're supposed to make a difference. You were born to make a difference in your life. And so, yeah, a ticket into the game is being a good human. A ticket into the game is being kind and caring, which is pretty rare nowadays.

• 13:26Ed Mylett?

  So that's a ticket into the stadium. But then you gotta get on the field and play. And to play the game is what life's all about. We were put here to play the game. And I can tell you that on the other side of it, here's the great news. Your family won't think that anymore, that way anymore when you're done. My family doesn't think like that anymore. My nephews, my nieces, my sisters, my mom, my family, they don't think like that anymore. They get it. And so I not only changed the financial dynamic of my family, I changed our emotions, I changed the way we think. And by the way, I would say that had my dad not made the decisions he made, I would have never been in a position, the sacrifices he made allowed me to be the one. And so the other thing, lastly, I'd say is a lot of you have beautiful souls in your family

• 14:11Ed Mylett?

  who've sacrificed so much for you. It's incumbent upon you now to rise up and to become that one that finishes the game, finishes the job. Some of you come from families with legacies of real tragedy in your family. Or maybe you're born into a dynamic where your entire race has been victimized, most of the generations of your existence, and you have ancestors that have sacrificed for you. I don't have that history, but many of you do. Man, you gotta do something great and honor them and take it to the next level and honor those sacrifices they made. And so, it'll change the way they think eventually.

• 14:44Jamie Kern Lima?

  What you just shared is gonna change someone's life today.

• 14:47Ed Mylett?

  Good.

• 14:48Jamie Kern Lima?

  Hearing that, it's huge. And you talk about the one in your family and you know, two things to let everyone in on behind the scenes a little bit is, you know, right before we started filming, we were sitting down just now and realized for the first time, we both have bagged groceries at Safeway, pushed carts in the parking lot.

• 15:05Ed Mylett?

  Yeah, you were better at it than me though.

• 15:06Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah, you were saying, you put the bread on the bottom and the eggs.

• 15:10Ed Mylett?

  Don't put the eggs and the bread and the cakes on the bottom of the canned food.

• 15:13Jamie Kern Lima?

  No, no. But we were both, you know, the one in our family, right? And I think that concept that you talk about is so powerful. Because there's so many people out there that have that narrative of like, oh, where I come from, maybe limits where I can go. It's like, no, no, no. You can be the one in your family.

• 15:32Ed Mylett?

  Well, you're a much better example than most people that know your story. You're a tremendous example of that being the case. And so...

• 15:40Jamie Kern Lima?

  Well, thank you. And I knew you're gonna try to make it about me today. I'm like, uh-uh, we're going right back to you, Ed Mylett. You're in the hot seat. This is about you. This is about you. Thank you, though.

• 15:48Ed Mylett?

  Yeah, and you know that's true about you.

• 15:50Jamie Kern Lima?

  One other thing I wanna share, because I wanna dive in deep to the making of Ed Mylett in a second. But just to share one thing, as your friend, I'm gonna do this. I'm gonna do this. Because what I learned from writing a book is no one knows these things. And I'm just gonna share it with everyone in your community. Because so many people, millions of people, have been listening to you, served by you, getting your free content every day on your show and all your channels. And for everyone listening who loves you and maybe is like, how can I actually support Ed? I'm just gonna say this, because now you wouldn't say this. When you, as an author, when people order your book, and not just order it, but preorder it, right, before it comes out, or the first week it's out, second week,

• 16:34Jamie Kern Lima?

  that is so important. And nobody knows this, right? And let me just share with everyone listening, because it's super important, that you do it, if you're gonna grab a book, right? You're gonna grab The Power of One More. Grab it now. Do a preorder or do it the first week it's out.

• 16:48Ed Mylett?

  Thank you.

• 16:49Jamie Kern Lima?

  It's a big deal for authors. And the reason why is retailers, they need to see that demand. Then they can keep it in stock. If they don't see that beforehand, then the book may be out of stock. Right? I know you don't care about making any of the lists, all the bestseller lists, but a lot of those are determined on your first week of sales. And so I'm just gonna take a moment as your friend. I know you're gonna be embarrassed if I say this, but every single person watching right now, like, we got some good stuff coming. So, let me just say that. But pause this interview if you can, if you have not grabbed this book. First of all, this book is life-changing, but also, you know, preorder it. If you're gonna get it, if you're able to get it, do it now. A lot of people think like, "Oh, I'll get it next month or the month after," because they don't realize it actually helps the author so much.

• 17:30Ed Mylett?

  Thank you.

• 17:30Jamie Kern Lima?

  When you grab it early or right when it launches. And what I love to do, by the way, to support my friends too, is like, in your Amazon address book, just click a few people and then send them one too.

• 17:41Ed Mylett?

  Wow, thank you.

• 17:41Jamie Kern Lima?

  I just had to do that. I had to do that. It's the friend thing. It's the friend thing to do.

• 17:45Ed Mylett?

  Thank you.

• 17:45Jamie Kern Lima?

  But I wanna dive in. I'm excited and fired up now. I wanna dive in to, and you are so generous with how vulnerable you are and how transparent you are with everyone in your community out of a pure heart of service. I think so many people connect, millions of people who connect to you, see different parts of their story through yours, and maybe are inspired to navigate their own journey through how you navigate yours in different twists and turns. And so, I wanna just dive in for a minute and talk about a few things that I think, some of them I know you've never shared before. So, this is gonna be, this is gonna be, this is gonna be fun. But I'm gonna start with sharing some of your words.

• 18:29Jamie Kern Lima?

  So, you said this quote, "You have it within you. I'm no different than you. I wasn't born with some magic gene that you don't have. I just wanted to win so bad that I didn't allow anyone or anything to steal my dreams. Procrastination is a thief and fear is a liar." So, first question on that is, growing up, what were your greatest fears?

• 18:57Ed Mylett?

  I had so many. It's really weird, as you're asking that, I was starting to actually get emotional.

• 19:07Ed Mylett?

  Because I was picturing, I was picturing me as a little guy. And it's just dawnin' on me how scared I always was, you know?

• 19:23Ed Mylett?

  All the time. So, I was afraid my dad was gonna leave.

• 19:34Ed Mylett?

  I was afraid he was gonna get hurt, or killed, or hurt us, sometimes. And those, those, the, the idea of fear was around me all the time. So, just going to school afraid I'd embarrass myself. No one would know this, 'cause I had this pretty good mask I could kinda put on, where, I don't know why it makes me so, I mean, it's bizarre right now. It's just, I'll be real, what I'm thinking right now, you wanna tell me what I'm thinking? I'm actually thinking I still am. I'm actually thinking I still am. So, and I don't know that, yeah, I was afraid of everything.

• 20:19Ed Mylett?

  So I was afraid of being a failure, I was afraid of letting people down, I was afraid my family wasn't gonna exist, I was afraid of, afraid people would figure out who I was, and that I wasn't that special. Figure out how average I was. When I even had success, like when I played baseball, I'd have this fear that I was, it was a fluke. I still have a lot of that to this day, where I'm like, "It's a fluke. They're gonna figure me out eventually. They're gonna figure out I'm not that big of a deal." So, I think that, now, I will say that, I think those of you that are like, "Wow", relating to that a little bit, I think not all emotions are negative or positive. Some fear's healthy. Some fear causes us to focus. Some fear causes us to make our best effort, right?

• 21:03Ed Mylett?

  We were given fear back in the caveman days, so that T-Rex didn't eat us, right? So there's some fear, but to be riddled with it all the time. And I think I'm still a little bit of that guy. I think I still have a lot of it. So, I had lots of fear, I had a lot of chaos. I realized as I got older, I, and by the way, we, I talk about in the book that you have an emotional home, that you have these three or four or five emotions you get on a really regular basis. And it's just, the reason I get emotional talking about it right now, and I've never said what I just said out loud, ever, not to my wife, not to you, not to anybody, not to myself. Is that even though I've worked really hard on taking an inventory of what emotions I want. I want peace, I want joy, I want ecstasy, I want happiness.

• 21:47Ed Mylett?

  And I've really got a lot of those. Like I really have intentionally given myself the gift of those emotions. The one that I've not riddled myself, riddled myself of regularly is fear. I'm still afraid, I'm afraid the book's not gonna be successful. I'm afraid my podcast isn't gonna do well. I'm afraid my speech isn't gonna go well. And so, the truth is, I still have a lot of that. And that's a good thing, at 51 years old, to say, hey, there's still room for me to improve. There's still things I gotta work on. And I don't want anybody that follows my stuff all the time or me to think, oh, he's got every single thing figured out. The truth is, as I'm talking to you, I'm realizing even a little bit more, not realizing I was gonna say this at all today, but that that's still a thing I gotta really address, is fear.

• 22:34Jamie Kern Lima?

  Do you have a fear right now that if you lose your fear, you'll lose your edge?

• 22:39Ed Mylett?

  Yes. You're so brilliant. Yes. We have these things that we do in life that we think are why we're successful. Now, unconsciously, I know that too. Like, I know that, I used to think my intensity, almost my temper, when I was young in business, thought, hey, you take away my temper, you know, because I'm winning with my temper, right? So, you take that away, I'm not gonna win. The truth is, I was winning in spite of my temper. I was winning in spite of my lack of emotional control. But this fear dude's been with me since I can remember. This fear is my friend. This fear is like my closest companion, right? And so, to let go of that guy is, makes me fearful, is to do it.

• 23:22Ed Mylett?

  And I think sometimes what you think when you have that thing, is you think, I'm just talking from my perspective, I can manage it, I'll manage it. And maybe I do manage it sometimes, okay. But I shouldn't be as afraid as I am. I don't need to be afraid, you know? And I still have a huge amount of it. So, yeah, I do have this thing, like if I let that go, I wonder what my ...to achieve this, like what's the driver now? If I'm not afraid of anything, then am I just gonna start laying around and doing something? Doing nothing, you know? So I do have an element of that. And I actually have tools for this in the book that I should give myself the gift of using. So it's a great question.

• 24:03Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah, you do. And I'm wondering, just hearing you talk about this. There's a famous quote by the rapper 50 Cent that says, "Either pray or worry, but don't do both." I'm wondering too, in your journey of fear, being an emotional home for you, to use your your reference, like, is this a, is this part of your spiritual journey to learn that it's not all on you?

• 24:29Ed Mylett?

  Yes. And when I'm good, that's what I, I've told you this too. When I'm really feeling like I'm in my calling or doing something, I'm, or I'm at my best is when I am in that state. I also think it's probably why I, I do pray so often. I wonder if sometimes I'm praying to rid that monster that's like, sitting there all the time. It's why I am such a praying person. And yes, certainly like consciously, I know that it's not me anyway. Consciously, I know that I'm being protected. But I'll, I'll share something really personal, like, like I feel like I'm talking to you. I forget that it's my show. But it just dawned on me as you were saying that. I pray for protection and comfort every day.

• 25:11Ed Mylett?

  So my prayers evolve about different things I'm working on, but one that never leaves me is that, that, you know, "Lord, let your will be done and allow me to surrender to your will and protect me." And my dad used to, before games, when I would play, my dad would never, we would never pray that I'd get three hits in a game. My dad would always say, "Just pray that, that God protects you, protects everybody else, and that you get to play to the best of your ability. And if that's enough, great, and if it's not, great." And that prayer would always really comfort me before events. And I still do that before we do this, or before, you know, I speak, or I have a big meeting or anything.

• 25:52Ed Mylett?

  I always just pray that same exact, I don't know why it makes me so emotional, but I just pray that exact same prayer, you know, that your will be done, and I just do the best that you can have me do. And if that's enough, great, and if it's not, that's okay. So.

• 26:06Jamie Kern Lima?

  So beautiful, it gives a piece.

• 26:10Jamie Kern Lima?

  You know, I wanted to ask you about something that I think has affected you. I know it's affected you, but so many people listening have this in their life. And maybe they shove it in the back of their mind, but it's still there. And that is this idea of labels. And what I mean is, like, so many of us have had, maybe it's when we were kids, someone called us a name, or, you know, we're in a situation and someone says, "Oh, but you're not smart enough," or "You don't have what it takes," or "You're the wrong fit for this," or "You don't come from the right family," or this, that, the other thing. And a lot of times, we then find ourselves as an adult, and that label is like stuck, and it's taken root. And now it's sort of coming out in our lives,

• 26:52Jamie Kern Lima?

  and we haven't even thought about it in years, but it's still there, that identity. When you were, I think it was eight, eight years old, you were called Eddie Spaghetti, Eddie Spaghetti. Can you share how that happened? And how you did or didn't let that label take root?

• 27:12Ed Mylett?

  Yeah, I talk about this in the book a lot, too, is that, and how to overcome it, which I have, that part of me, I've leveraged into something pretty strong. But I talk about in the book that a lot of the beliefs we have about ourselves were installed in us, our identities, these thoughts and concepts we believe to be most true about us, our worth. They were installed in us when we were defenseless as kids. So it's like, be a good boy, be quiet, be a good girl, don't do that, don't make too much noise, don't... And you start to, just start to develop this identity when you're young. And then when you get out into the world, because you believe it, you confirm it, and then you gather more and more references for it. And before you know it, you're 20, or 30, or 35 years old, and it's who you are. And you've proven it because of this, your identity's the most powerful force in the world.

• 27:56Ed Mylett?

  You're gonna be consistent with it. And most of what you believe about yourself, you weren't in control of believing. It was put there when you were a child, well, same with me. So you have this combination of this kid who's at home, things aren't real stable there most of the time. Sometimes I feel like I overcooked that, too, because when it was good, it was very loving. And the other thing is, I had this loving mother a hundred... 100% of the time, right, 100% of the time. And great grandparents and lots of great stuff, but there was this thing, right? So you have that anxiety going and chaos. Going to school, I'm a little guy. I'm shy. I'm very, very shy. You know this about me to this day. I'm still very introverted, which surprises most people because of the speaking and stuff in the show. But I'm super introverted. And I just started to get picked on.

• 28:41Ed Mylett?

  And this Eddie Spaghetti, your meatballs, right? And the class would sing it to me and they'd see me get upset. And it started to develop into this pattern of you're not good enough all the time. And then I remember, you know, a few years later, a baseball coach, really I was become a pretty good player. But we had a great player on our team who went on to play like Major League Baseball for many, many years. He's still a really good friend of mine. And I'd had a couple of bad games and I was down. And our coach pulled me into his office. He was sort of a mean dude. He's a good dude, but he was a tough dude. He pulled me into his office. He goes, "Hey Eddie Spaghetti, this is now I'm a teenager." And he goes, "Did you ever think that maybe you're just not as good as him? Like you going 0 for 3, like you can go 0 for 3, he can't.

• 29:23Ed Mylett?

  So why don't you just accept the fact you're just not that good?" This was my coach, right? And I remember just walking out of there like, "Whoa." And then I've shared with you another story that when I became a speaker, someone that I looked up to was like, "You know, you're really not that good." You know, like I can't even listen to you for more than about 15 minutes. And then, and I, I used to think to like, "Am I like, is there something on me that's like, you can just punch me? Like, is there something about me like you, people think they can just tell me these things about me? What is it about me? Because other people aren't, what I found out is other people are hearing similar things. And the truth is, I just started to go, I actually asked myself a question that I say in the book. I don't really believe that many good things about myself.

• 30:07Ed Mylett?

  What would I need to believe about me that would serve me? What would I actually need to believe about me that would cause me to change the way I show up in the world? What would I need to believe? And all of a sudden, I started to really think about that. How would that guy walk? How would that guy talk? I'm doing an impersonation of this insecure guy. I'm doing an impersonation of a shy person. I'm doing an impersonation of someone who doesn't have confidence. It's an impersonation, it's not who I really am. Well, maybe I could begin to impersonate the person I want to be. And I actually started to impersonate him a little bit. Not fake it, but like, you know what? He'd walk with his shoulders back. His voice would be a little bit deeper than the one I'd walk around with. He'd think certain things about himself.

• 30:49Ed Mylett?

  Moreover, he would treat other people a particular way. He would treat other people in a kind and generous and strong way. Almost in an overabundance of kindness and generosity to people. And belief and love for people. And a lot of that happened when I worked at the orphanage. I was like, now that's the guy I like. That's the guy that I am. I'm the giving guy. I'm the kind guy. And you know what? I found out when I did that, I took it away from me, as we said earlier. It was about other people that I found a lot more peace. So I just started to become that person. And slowly but surely, I think I am that person.

• 31:29Jamie Kern Lima?

  That is really powerful. There's, I'm sure, so many people, I'm sure they'll send messages about this, who, you know, see you online, watch your content, and maybe think that everything's perfect.

• 31:40Ed Mylett?

  Right.

• 31:40Jamie Kern Lima?

  And think that you were just born with all this confidence and with, you know, everyone loving you and millions of people following you, even through grade school, right? I mean, we tend to think those things about people that we don't yet know deeply. And then we think when those things happen to us, like someone tells us we're just not good enough, we kind of hide it because we're embarrassed by it or we think it doesn't happen to other people. And I feel like you... Sharing that is so powerful.

• 32:09Ed Mylett?

  Thank you. I think I have a lot of people from high school actually that follow me now, right? When you, when you're, and I think if you were to ask a lot of them, because they've told me this, I just wasn't, I, I think they would just say to you like, it just, I wouldn't expect it to have been Eddie. You know, not like he was a complete, I was just there. If that makes any sense, like, no, I would not, there was no like, most likely to succeed in any of my, you know, yearbooks or anything like that. But I don't think by the time I graduated, it wasn't like he's a complete dumb dumb. But it was just like, he's just Eddie Mylett, you know, he's just Eddie. Like, you would never suspect he would be the person that, you know, might reach a lot of human beings in his life, you know, you just would never have predicted that. And that ought to give everybody hope. If, if you're not one of those people that everyone's like, no, for sure it's her.

• 32:54Ed Mylett?

  I was definitely not that person. You go, oh, just mark it down, he's gonna do something great with his life. No, no one was saying that about me, no one. No teacher, no coach. Maybe a couple of teachers when I was a little, little guy, but most people would not have said that anything significant was ever gonna happen.

• 33:12Jamie Kern Lima?

  So good. They didn't know you were the one.

• 33:14Ed Mylett?

  That's right.

• 33:15Jamie Kern Lima?

  They didn't know, that's, that's powerful, because a lot of people are wondering, am I the one? Can I be the one? No one's telling me I'm the one.

• 33:20Ed Mylett?

  And I think the fact that you doubt, I think the fact that you doubt or wonder whether you're the one is indicative of the fact that you probably are.

• 33:27Jamie Kern Lima?

  Woo!

• 33:28Ed Mylett?

  I do, I do. I just believe that.

• 33:31Jamie Kern Lima?

  That's so good.

• 33:33Ed Mylett?

  And you know this, and by the way, the reason it's good is because you know that to be true about you.

• 33:36Jamie Kern Lima?

  I know that's true, but I've never thought about it that way. I know that's true. And I'm just thinking right now, I have goosebumps thinking about how many people are listening to this. And right now, they know that they're wondering if they're the one.

• 33:46Ed Mylett?

  Yeah, and that makes you probably the one.

• 33:48Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yes.

• 33:48Ed Mylett?

  Yes, that's right. And you know this because it happened in your life.

• 33:51Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yes, that is huge. Um, alright.

• 33:53Ed Mylett?

  This is good.

• 33:54Jamie Kern Lima?

  I wanna talk about, you know, the story, your, can you share with everyone this story? I feel like someone needs to hear this today about your first grade teacher.

• 34:03Ed Mylett?

  Yeah, Mrs. Smith.

• 34:04Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yes.

• 34:05Ed Mylett?

  So, yeah, um, I'll even elaborate on it a little bit. So I had no confidence at all. And, and I was getting picked on. This is what I think happened. Mrs. Smith was just a super really kind lady, and we had moved to, um, The town that we were in then, and so I was also a new kid. On top of being small, on top of being Eddie Spaghetti, on top of being insecure, on top of leaving many mornings where my dad maybe didn't come home the night before, or there was this turmoil the night before. I'm just leaving that house, this little dude. I wish I could go back and hug him. You know, which my mom did a lot of, by the way. And so, she knew that I just had no self-esteem. And I believe she orchestrated this entire thing, but we were doing testing like

• 34:50Ed Mylett?

  for grades and stuff, for the next grades. And she purposely had, I believe she purposely did this for me. She had someone come in the back of the room and say, "Mrs. Smith, we need your smartest student to come take a test to represent the class." And I could see the person in the back, I heard them. And I watched Mrs. Smith go, "That's Eddie Mylett. I would pick Eddie, he's the smart boy." And she picks me, and I remember going, "Oh my gosh, she thinks I'm the smart boy." And I just looked at her and she smiled at me. And I remember just lighting up. And then the person goes, "Okay, um, then Eddie Mylett, you need to come with us." And I stood up.

• 35:35Ed Mylett?

  And it was the first time ever in my life that I was like, "I'm special." "This is special." And I walked up and went to the back. And I took the test and I guess I did well. But when I came back in, I didn't say this on the last time I told this. When I came back in, at the end of the day, the class was over, and Mrs. Smith said, "Eddie, can you come up here for me?" And I came up, and uh, she hugged me. And she goes, "You're so special and so smart, you're the smartest boy." She just like hugs on me for a minute. And um...

• 36:16Ed Mylett?

  It really changed my life a lot. It changed my life because that was the first time I was like, well, maybe, maybe they're wrong. Maybe I'm, maybe I am smart. Maybe I am special. And this beautiful soul knew exactly what she was doing. She orchestrated all that. She knew there was this child. I think she had this sense, something was going on in my home. Because kids don't come like that to school, that shy, that timid, unless something's wrong at the house. And I'm telling you the truth that I've thought about that like hundreds, maybe thousands of times in my life. That, that event in my life.

• 36:58Ed Mylett?

  What a beautiful, beautiful soul she was. So, that's Mrs. Smith. It's one of those people, you know, in your life when you close your eyes and you go, there's this handful of humans that make you feel special, make you feel loved and cared for and believed in. And she's on that highlight reel of like, maybe three or four human beings in my entire 51 years. And the reason that that's important is because I've tried really hard in my life to be that person for other people. That they go, he loves me, he cares about me. He, maybe even as important, he believes in me.

• 37:42Ed Mylett?

  And, and then you show people how to live a little better. And that's exactly what she did. She was a super, super special person. And little did she know, that little first grade dude would, you know, be on a show with you today.

• 37:55Jamie Kern Lima?

  You know, last night when we were talking on the phone about this idea about how many people don't feel seen. And I'm just imagining like the power, right, of her seeing you.

• 38:07Ed Mylett?

  First time anyone saw me. I was telling you last night that... A lot of my work in my life has been, I don't know why it makes me so emotional, but a lot of my work in my life has been about helping people that perform pretty well, perform their best. And the more and more I've been doing what I do, the more it's occurring to me that that's, my role is a little different, and that is that there's millions and millions and millions of people, maybe more than ever in the world, that were like the first grader me, but they're 30 years old. They're 35 years old, they're 40 years old, they're 22 years old, and they don't believe they're important, they don't believe they're valuable, they don't know what their role in the world is.

• 38:48Ed Mylett?

  They walk in a room and no one knows them, no one acknowledges them, no one sees them. And more and more and more, our culture's making that prevalent. And then worse, sometimes we're mean to one another, or hurtful to one another. And I really feel like the remaining part of my life is to help people know that they are seen, that they are important, that they do matter, that they do have something to give. My sister's here watching this, my baby sister, who runs all my businesses. But my middle sister is hugely successful as well.

• 39:27Ed Mylett?

  She's not on Instagram, she's not wealthy, she's born with diabetes, she's basically blind, she can't drive anymore. And, but she's changing the world every day. And what she does is she's a schoolteacher at a Christian school, she doesn't make any money, any real money. But every day, she's using the gifts God gave her, her two or three gifts, which are her kindness, her ability to teach, her gentle nature. She's also really tiny and short, right? So she's the same height as the students, like she was made for this job. And she helps little children feel seen and important. And guess what? She's seen and important.

• 40:11Ed Mylett?

  And I want people to know that you do matter. You're not invisible. You count. You were born to do something great with your life in big ways, what people think are big and what people think are small ways. But I see you, I know you see them. And I just want people to feel like, you know, our community and what I'm gonna do with the rest of my life is to let you know that you matter, that you're important, that you're beautiful, that you're special. And that you were made. God made you in His image and likeness. He literally made you in His image and likeness to do something beautiful with your life. And you may not have found it yet, but we're gonna find it together, all of us together. We're gonna find it for you. We're gonna find it. We're gonna take advantage of your great blessings and gifts that God gave you. And He did give them to you.

• 40:56Ed Mylett?

  And you need to figure out what they are, and we'll help you do that. And I hope the book helps with that, actually, a lot, too.

• 41:01Jamie Kern Lima?

  The book is so powerful about that. And, you know, I think another powerful thing about your story and you getting to this place where you're able to articulate, like, your contribution to the world and with such clarity and granularity about how you see people and the impact you wanna make. But on your journey, right? Because there's people that probably heard what you just said. Like, okay, I believe it, but right now, I can barely pay the rent. Or right now, I don't feel seen when I walk in the room. And what I wanna ask you that I think is so beautiful and relatable about your journey is you have been in a situation in your life where you were driving a car where the panels were Velcroed on.

• 41:46Jamie Kern Lima?

  You've had your car repossessed. You've had your home, I believe, foreclosed on. You had to shower in a public shower.

• 41:56Ed Mylett?

  Yeah.

• 41:57Jamie Kern Lima?

  Can you share about that time in your life? And in that time, did you still have this sense? This sense that you had a calling, that you were gonna make it, even if you didn't see a way at the time? Because I think there's people listening right now that feel like they're in that spot. And they think, okay, I meant to do something great with my life, but like, look at my situation.

• 42:20Ed Mylett?

  Yeah.

• 42:20Jamie Kern Lima?

  But you've been there.

• 42:21Ed Mylett?

  I've been there. So, yeah, I've had, of all that stuff, happen. The hard part for me was that, like I said earlier, I had these fears. Maybe a lot of people can relate to this. I wasn't really sure that I could do something great with my life. And then when I started to, I was like, maybe I can. And then when I'd have this setback, I'm like... I knew it. It was a fluke. And the worst, though, was when the water got turned off. When the water got turned off and we would have to go down to that outdoor shower. We were newly married and take showers every morning there. And I'd hold the towel up and Kristina would brush her teeth and shower outside. And then she would hold it up for me. And then I'd totally emasculated in the shade. We'd walk up every morning to that apartment. And I'm trying to sell the dream and I'm living a nightmare, right?

• 43:05Ed Mylett?

  But I have to tell you that my faith during those times, I did actually have a little bit of a sense that, you know what?

• 43:15Ed Mylett?

  I'm gonna do something great. And I got really, really, really, really close to not believing that. But my dad had this thing where when he got sober, and it's just stuck with me, thank God. My dad, when he got sober, I said, "Dad, are you gonna stay sober the rest of your life?" And this is where the power of one more comes in. My dad says, "I don't know. I can tell you this. I'm gonna stay sober for one more day." And so when I went through that, my dad called me. I was really broke. My dad goes, "You thinking about quitting?" And I go, "Yeah, I'm close." He goes, "Just don't quit for one more day."

• 43:52Ed Mylett?

  He's so wise. And I didn't. And that not quitting for one more day and holding on would go to the next day and to the next day. But there were these glimpses in my life where it's like, you know what? I may not be the smartest or the best talker. I definitely don't have the highest IQ. I'm not the tallest dude or the strongest dude or the best-looking dude or any of that. But I'm not gonna get outworked. I'm gonna outwork you. I'm gonna do one more rep in the gym. I'm gonna do one more phone call. I'm gonna do one more email. I'm gonna do one more text. And I did have this overriding opinion, which I opened the book up with, that, you know what? I am one meeting away from changing my life. I'm one decision away. I'm one relationship away. I'm one new thought. I'm one new client. I'm one away.

• 44:36Ed Mylett?

  I never, I never thought it was impossible. And I also really believed, here's the thing that I had advantage of. I believed in this one more stuff so strongly that I also didn't think it needed to be 25 years away either. I thought it was like, even for you, in your career, you struggled and struggled and struggled and struggled. And then, you know, the QVC moment happens, right? And so there was this one moment, one decision, one meeting, one show. And it wasn't all the one, because there's all the things you led up to that. But it was a catalyst that put you to a new level. It catapults you to a new level. And so for me, I always was looking for that one. What's the meaning? What's the thought? What's the emotion? What's this seminar I should go to? What's the breakthrough? And I stacked up these one more's.

• 45:21Ed Mylett?

  And I did have this sense like, I am gonna be the person who is pursuing these one more's much more aggressively than most other people will. Because I'm not the smartest. And so, because I'm not, I have to outwork people. And I can control that. And I think anybody who knows me will tell you back in those days, and even now, they'd say that dude doesn't get cheated when it comes to work. I won't get cheated. So that humility of knowing my limitations. Some of you, they're like, I know I'm not this or that or the other. Awesome. That's great. Let's leverage that into being a one more thinker. Being a one more doer. Let's leverage our humility. That humility you have, which is all it really is. You're way more talented, way more gifted, way more favored than you know you are.

• 46:04Ed Mylett?

  But let's leverage the fact that you don't believe all that stuff about you. You don't have to believe all these great things about you. What we have to do is do the right things for right now. And as we do the right things, all this evidence is gonna start to appear for you, one by one by one by one. And by the way, I'm not unique to that. Jamie's story is identical, in just a different way, in a different form. And if you took apart most people who are successful, there are these one meetings, one relationship, one decision away from new levels all the time. And I did have a belief I would find those.

• 46:36Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah. When I read the open of your book, I instantly went to, you know, as everyone I think will do. You apply it right away to your own life. And you start thinking about where could I have done one more? Where did I do one more and it made all the difference? And the first thing I thought about was, you know, for me, it was hundreds and hundreds of no's. But I learned to sort of change my relationship with rejection and just keep going for that one. One more and then I eventually got that one yes.

• 47:02Ed Mylett?

  Yeah.

• 47:03Jamie Kern Lima?

  And then I eventually got the one show and I would email, email, email. You know, trying to get into a retailer who told me I would never write and it's that one more email.

• 47:11Ed Mylett?

  Exactly.

• 47:11Jamie Kern Lima?

  And you don't know which one it's gonna be.

• 47:13Ed Mylett?

  Yeah.

• 47:13Jamie Kern Lima?

  But when you go for that one more.

• 47:16Ed Mylett?

  You change your relationship, let me ask you this. Do you change your relationship with the one more or with the rejection? Do you think to some extent that people, I write about this a little bit in the book, but I'm more and more believing this. Do you feel like maybe you have a different relationship with pain than most people? Meaning, I feel like to some extent eventually, because I got a lot of pain in my life. I think my relationship with it changed. That the presence of it didn't mean necessarily I was a failure. Or the presence of pain or adversity used to mean to me, see, that's proof, I'm not.

• 47:51Jamie Kern Lima?

  Right.

• 47:51Ed Mylett?

  But now, at some point, the presence of pain, my relationship was like, I'm gonna get something from my pain. I'm gonna get, I'm gonna get pain anyway. And I talk about this a lot lately, but all pain is temporary. It's when we believe it's permanent. Nothing's permanent. My father's body, other than my father's soul. My father's body even wasn't permanent. My body's not permanent. So the pain, my father's pain in going through chemo or radiation or the surgeries wasn't permanent. And so, the pain you're in, whatever it is, is not permanent. Don't make permanent decisions based on temporary pain and temporary conditions. And at some point, my relationship with pain changed just a little bit.

• 48:36Ed Mylett?

  To where the presence of it, Napoleon Hill says that on the other side of pain, if you can survive the temporary, you get introduced to your other self. And that's so profound to think, this presence of pain in my life, if I can survive the temporary, on the other side of it, I meet another me. And usually, another version of your life is on the other side of it. So now when pain comes into our lives, it's not that we want it, not that we embrace it, but we almost dance with it differently now. Because we know on the other side of this, there's another us. And you know this to be true. You've met many different versions of yourself on the other side of temporary setbacks and pain. So have I, and I hope that helps everyone.

• 49:17Jamie Kern Lima?

  It does, well, and I don't fear it anymore.

• 49:19Ed Mylett?

  Me either.

• 49:20Jamie Kern Lima?

  And I wanna get really real about pain though. You. I don't want to say inflict pain on yourself, cause pain. You're very hard on yourself. And I think that may surprise a lot of people. Because you are also so inspiring and uplifting and you just, oh my goodness, can you just pour into someone? And have them just believing to the point where they're flying. You know what I mean? Flying high with belief.

• 49:48Ed Mylett?

  Thank you.

• 49:49Jamie Kern Lima?

  And, this other part of you is so hard on yourself.

• 49:53Ed Mylett?

  Yeah.

• 49:54Jamie Kern Lima?

  Can you share that?

• 49:56Ed Mylett?

  This is what I've finally discovered as I've gotten older. Is that when you allow yourself to feel loved and valued, you'll actually achieve far more significant things. So, this actual feeling of if I get this achievement, I get this significance, then I'll get love, is actually a limiting level of significance and achievement. But someone who feels loved, someone who feels cared for, someone who feels valuable, they go achieve far greater external things anyway. And it's not always just achievement. It also can just be attention. So sometimes people conflate attention with love. So, they, if I can get this woman's attention, if I can get this man's attention, if I look, my look, if they think I look great and I can get attention for that, then I'll feel loved.

• 50:40Ed Mylett?

  Or if they think I'm really smart, then I'll feel loved. Or if I can read them my resume, that I've got an MBA, or I've got a doctorate, then I'll feel loved. Or I'm gonna tell them about my jet and my car. I meet people all the time where I live here, that's like, the first three minutes is their resume. I've got this, I've got that, I did this, I did that. And I've literally stopped people here before, after a while when they do it with me, at this particular place I live in, I go, "Hey, brother. I love you.

• 51:08Ed Mylett?

  It's cool, brother. I love you. You're cool with me if you had that jet or you didn't. I don't love your jet, I love you." Right? "I don't love how beautiful you are. I love you." Right? "I don't love what you're achieving." And so- We have an achievement addicted culture as well. That's lying to people by saying, "If you'll just go do these things, then you'll feel better about yourself, then you'll be happier." And I talk a lot about blissful dissatisfaction, which is essentially this. People conflate. You can be dissatisfied and want more and still be blissful. You can live blissfully and still be... dissatisfaction's healthy. Dissatisfaction says, "I'm capable of this and I'm doing this. I want to fill the gap."

• 51:51Ed Mylett?

  That's wonderful. Nothing wrong with being dissatisfied. That's totally different than being unhappy, though. So you can simultaneously be blissful and happy and dissatisfied to the extent that you want to grow and change.

• 52:07Jamie Kern Lima?

  I want to actually read something from the power of "One More." Because you know, you talk and you've shared a lot already in this interview about being raised by a dad who was an alcoholic, but actually then changed and transformed later in his life.

• 52:29Jamie Kern Lima?

  And changed for you and your whole family. And also just in his own form of contribution to the world. And I'm going to read part of this and then I would love to actually hand it over to you to read part of.

• 52:48Jamie Kern Lima?

  So this is page 243. Page 243.

• 52:54Jamie Kern Lima?

  "Through his hard work with Alcoholics Anonymous, my father embraced the idea of living one more day sober, a core mantra of AA. In fact, it became the entire premise of his life. That may sound like a small thing to overcome if you've never battled addiction. But in the world of an alcoholic, winning this fight, one more day at a time, means everything. Once he committed to it, my dad didn't try to stay sober every remaining day of his life. He tried to stay sober one more day of his life. One day at a time stacked upon each other until days became weeks and months and they became years. The difference in that kind of mindset means everything to a recovering alcoholic."

• 53:36Jamie Kern Lima?

  If you're reading this and you're thinking about quitting on your dream, a business you've started, or anything important to you, don't put the pressure on yourself to meet that goal for five or 10 years or the rest of your life. Instead, think about not quitting for one more day.

• 53:53Jamie Kern Lima?

  And I want to hop to one other part that I'm gonna hand over to you in a moment. And this is about your dad.

• 54:03Jamie Kern Lima?

  The third and final thing to know is that it's never too late for one last one more. "After my father died, I came across several index cards as I was putting away some of his things. On these cards were scribbled codes like 14JL and 13PT. They were scattered on his vanity unit and taped to his bathroom mirror. These codes were dates and the initials of someone's name, and there were hundreds of them. I soon figured out that every one of those cards represented a person my dad had helped get sober. And the dates were that person's sobriety anniversary date. Here's the most remarkable part.

• 54:47Jamie Kern Lima?

  On those dates, my father would call that person, wish them a happy sobriety birthday, and congratulate them. His message to them was simple. All you must do is stay sober for one more day." And I want to hand this to you if you could read the rest of this right here, starting here.

• 55:16Ed Mylett?

  "He made these calls hundreds of times a year, every year, including in the last days of his life.

• 55:26Ed Mylett?

  Even while he was on oxygen, struggling to breathe and could barely whisper, he still reached out and made calls to people on his note cards. Although he was in severe pain and agony, and he knew he would pass away soon, my father had to help one more person."

• 55:50Ed Mylett?

  Nobody was watching.

• 55:56Ed Mylett?

  Nobody would have known whether he made those calls or not. However, because my father lived a one more life, this was an opportunity for him to help. One last, one more human being. In the end, my father's one last one more was a phone call to another person in need shortly before he passed away. I've never been so moved or prouder of my dad. His quiet, kind,

• 56:30Ed Mylett?

  and humble gestures remain a profound example of service to others that I may never match.

• 56:42Ed Mylett?

  Now you know why I have made my sincere mission to try and help as many people as possible in my life too.

• 56:50Ed Mylett?

  I do it to honor my father.

• 57:03Ed Mylett?

  Coming back from the brink of losing his family and everything he worked for, my father found purpose and redemption. He made the most of the one last one more's chance he was given. Our physical being dies, and we do pass from this earth at some point. But my father's one last one more legacy will live through the ages.

• 57:27Ed Mylett?

  We should all be so lucky to live our lives that well.

• 57:34Ed Mylett?

  I haven't read that since I wrote it.

• 57:40Ed Mylett?

  Come on, Jamie.

• 57:41Jamie Kern Lima?

  A lot of people have, you know, written and wondered. You know, you don't need to do what you do. You don't... Your business is all kinds of stuff. You don't need to show up on stages and show up and serve millions of people every day. And I guess I just want to know, in your words, you know, that you just shared, is that why you do? And why you do what you do?

• 58:10Ed Mylett?

  That was really hard. Come on, girl.

• 58:16Ed Mylett?

  I've just discovered that that's why, when I wrote the book.

• 58:23Ed Mylett?

  I love people.

• 58:26Ed Mylett?

  And I really believe in people.

• 58:30Ed Mylett?

  I learned a lot from my dad. My dad was a really tough guy, too. Like, a really tough guy. And he was such a kind person. And so gentle and generous. And here's what dawned on me when my dad passed. Someone helped my dad.

• 59:00Ed Mylett?

  And I don't know who it is.

• 59:04Ed Mylett?

  But somebody helped my dad. And if someone didn't help my dad, my family would never be... I would never be in this situation. So...

• 59:19Ed Mylett?

  I would just like to be that person for someone in some area of their life. And...

• 59:29Ed Mylett?

  That's what we're all put here to do in our own way is to help other people. And I've found, and my dad had his way of doing it, and I've found my way of doing it. And some people do it by being a great artist and making music that changes people. Some people do it by being a schoolteacher, like my sister, right? Some people make great food. Some people care for children, or they're someone's nanny, and they're just amazing at changing a child's life or a family's life. We all have our way. But when it dawned on me, when I was writing this book, that, "Hey, someone helped my dad."

• 1:00:13Ed Mylett?

  And you never know when you help somebody, the ripple effect of what that's gonna be. That person, whoever they are, that helped my dad. My dad then helped thousands of other people quietly, every morning and night of his life, helping. And then had a son, who's me, who's helped a few people too. And so, when you help one person, you don't know what the ripple effects are, the ramifications of that one person you've helped, that one difference you've made in their life. And so, you have a responsibility to do it. And I know what most people are thinking. "What do I have to offer somebody?" You know what my dad had to offer somebody? I was a drunk. I was broken.

• 1:00:57Ed Mylett?

  I was a mess. That was what my dad had to offer. My dad's mess was his offer. Not his brilliance, not his... My dad's personal mess and his personal story was what he would offer you when he would help you. So you don't have to have some magnificent talent, or ability, or skill, or thing to help people. You have to be you. You have to have your story, your experience, your love. When I walked into McKinley, when my dad got me the job, the first day he got sober, the orphanage I worked at, all those little boys wanted, when they would turn and look at me. I walked in there, I wasn't qualified, I wasn't a psychologist.

• 1:01:40Ed Mylett?

  I didn't have any kids of my own. There's nothing about me that said I should be helping children, right? But guess what?

• 1:01:51Ed Mylett?

  I know what it's like to come from a family that's not perfect. So the only thing that qualified me to be there was my own family's mess. And all those little boys wanted from me, all they wanted, because God doesn't qualify the called, or call the qualified. He qualifies the called. All those little boys wanted from me was really simple. Hey, love me, care about me, believe in me, and show me how to do a little better. And that's what you do. And so, that's what I've learned from my dad. It's what I learned in writing the book, and it's what I've learned about each of us. And I'm super interested and optimistic about,

• 1:02:31Ed Mylett?

  could this become a movement in our culture where humans begin to treat each other differently? And we say, "Hey, I see you. You're awesome. You're not invisible. You matter. You're important. You count. You were born to do something great with your life. I love you. I care about you. I believe in you. Let me show you how to do a little better." Right? You show me how to do better, I'll show you how to do a little bit better.

• 1:02:54Jamie Kern Lima?

  You know, I'm just thinking you share so many powerful things about your dad. And now you are a grown man with two beautiful kids.

• 1:03:03Ed Mylett?

  I do have two beautiful kids.

• 1:03:04Jamie Kern Lima?

  Bella and Max.

• 1:03:05Ed Mylett?

  Yep.

• 1:03:06Jamie Kern Lima?

  What would you hope they would share and say about you as their dad?

• 1:03:15Ed Mylett?

  Wow. Well, like I said earlier, I think most things are caught, not taught.

• 1:03:22Ed Mylett?

  That's a great question.

• 1:03:26Ed Mylett?

  I hope they would tell me, well, I'll give you the real answer. I hope they would tell you that he loves God. And that he was a flawed guy, but he really, really loved people and really, really tried to help people. And I watched my daddy work his butt off all the time for other people, way past when he didn't need to anymore. And I hope maybe most importantly, other than God, is they say, "He loves me."

• 1:03:57Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 1:03:58Ed Mylett?

  "He loves me." And I would love them to think what I think of my dad. He was such a good man. He was such a good man. He was a decent man. He was a compassionate man. And he...

• 1:04:16Ed Mylett?

  He just didn't ever judge anybody. You couldn't bring my dad a story or a mistake. When you're in that kind of program, man, you hear stuff, right? Just didn't judge anybody because he didn't want to be judged himself. So, I hope my kids say, "My dad really loved the Lord and my dad loved people, loved me, and worked really, really hard to help people." That would be pretty cool if they would say that someday. I don't know if they would or not right now, but I hope they say that when I'm done.

• 1:04:43Jamie Kern Lima?

  You know, you bring up your love for the Lord. Can you, and I know this is personal, you haven't shared much about this publicly, but can you share a little about your faith journey?

• 1:04:54Ed Mylett?

  Sure. That was the hardest chapter in the book to write, I told you this, because I didn't want to offend anybody or put anyone off who has a different faith because I admire and respect people of all faiths. And I don't like when I believe religion becomes judgmental, or, "Hey, I know something you don't know," or "I'm right and you're wrong." We're talking about faith here, right? So, it's something that I really can't stand. And I, by the way, I'm a Christian. I also think sometimes, I have this feeling that sometimes organized religion, our friend Erwin likes to say, organized religion sometimes gets in the way between people and Jesus. So, I have all these thoughts about that stuff. But for me, there's one conclusion that, you know,

• 1:05:35Ed Mylett?

  although my earthly father was an incredible man and, you know, turned things around, my heavenly father was always present. And when I went back and looked through my life as I got a little bit older,

• 1:05:49Ed Mylett?

  there was one presence with me all the time that truly got me through all those times. And even though I may not have known he was there, he knew I was there. And he was there all the time. And my faith gives me, I mean, such tremendous comfort and peace. I always say I want more peace in my life. And what I really mean by that is I want more... Time to have my relationship with God. I have a relationship with God, though, which means that it ebbs and flows. Sometimes it's better than others. I actually think questioning and asking questions about your faith is healthy, because it helps you dig deeper and find more answers. But my faith has been the center part of my life. I can only conclude that there's an incredible, powerful, and loving God

• 1:06:31Ed Mylett?

  that's helped me reach all these conclusions and given me this journey. And if I really step back, there's just no way any of the stuff that's happened I could have done on my own. And the funny thing about writing a book about how to be more happy and successful, it's a little bit of a weird feeling, because although I'm giving you all the keys that I know in the book, like, alright, I'm 51, what do I know? Here's like 19 more, and I go deep, as you know, on the mind, and habits, and time management, and equanimity, and identity, and all this stuff in the book. But the truth is that there are entire pockets of my life where I can't explain them to you. They're supernatural. Like, there's entire times in my life where I'm like, all I can conclude, like when the water was turned off.

• 1:07:13Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 1:07:14Ed Mylett?

  It's a little bit of a blur. And then I sort of woke up, and it was almost like the Lord just picked me up and carried me for a while. And then kind of put me back down, and said, alright, I'm here with you still, but you're gonna, you know, and then he picked me up for a while, and put me back down again. And so, I'd be remiss if I wrote a book about being happy and successful, and I didn't have a chapter in the book on the most important, central part of all of it for me, which is that this is, I believe God put us here to love one another. God put us here to care about one another, to believe in one another, to show each other how to do better. That's what I think life is. And so, I also believe there's a purpose to this life beyond just being here for 80 or 100 years and our body dies. How do I know that? I know that from my dad.

• 1:07:59Ed Mylett?

  I know that... From his dad, and so my faith is the most important part of my life. I don't have a life without it. That's just the truth. None of this matters without it. And the most powerful thing ever for me is like those two babies of mine, Max and Bella. I love them more than you could possibly imagine loving two human beings. And to think that the Lord loves me even more than that, and loves you even more than that, and loves someone listening to them. Man, that's powerful. And the other last thing I'll say is, I believe in energy. I believe in science. I'm one of these crazy Christian people who believes that you, there's vibrational frequency. I actually believe in all that. I just happen to believe a creator created all of that. But I don't, I'm not a dummy.

• 1:08:43Ed Mylett?

  You and I are great friends because I love the, I love your frequency. I love you. I love the energy I feel from you. I think you like mine, like we all respond to energy. So I'm a, I'm a diverse believer in that sense. I'm just a devout Christian in the main sense. And so I had to write a book. I had to put that in there.

• 1:09:00Jamie Kern Lima?

  Do you ever doubt your faith?

• 1:09:02Ed Mylett?

  I have. I've questioned it. I've doubted it. Sure, when you see your father suffer like that, Lord, what are we doing here? Right? Or you see a tragedy in life, there are some things that just aren't, there aren't answers to. But I can tell you that there was a lot of things about my dad's suffering that served other people, including me. And so as I've been able to take away these keys in my life, yeah. I think the truth is that I don't believe I doubt my faith anymore to the extent of whether it's true. I doubt my depth of understanding of it. I doubt my depth of, sometimes I doubt my, I wish I could become closer.

• 1:09:44Ed Mylett?

  I regret sometimes in life, if I'm being honest, that I think a lot of us feel like, I'm gonna really get around to pursuing my faith more aggressively when.

• 1:09:52Jamie Kern Lima?

  Right.

• 1:09:53Ed Mylett?

  Right? When. And that time never comes. And so it was many, many years ago, I went, no, that time is kind of now. But even having said that, there are things about me, this calling on my heart, that I feel like I want to get closer. I want to get closer. And so the doubt part probably has changed from doubt of whether I believe what I believe, which I once have had, to more. Understanding and knowing more than I know. And so, that's probably the doubt part.

• 1:10:22Jamie Kern Lima?

  For people listening that maybe they don't have faith in their life, but they actually want to, but they just doubt God exists, right? And they just want to maybe take like a step towards seeing if they can incorporate faith, whatever that faith may be, by the way, into their life. Like, what do you say to them?

• 1:10:40Ed Mylett?

  Well, that's a great question, and I get asked that a lot. So, the first thing I would say to you is the fact that you're inquiring about it has been calling on your heart. You would not be, you wouldn't have this calling on your heart unless there was an existence of something you know you want to know more about. So, the fact that it's a calling, no one put that there. That was there from your birth. And so, you're trying to come home. And what I would say to do is to get quiet and to get still. And in stillness and quietness, there's a lot of answers there. And if there's somebody that you admire, I would say go have a conversation with them about their beliefs. Someone that's nonjudgmental. There are great books. I mean, depending on the faith you're going to pursue.

• 1:11:24Ed Mylett?

  If you were to pursue my faith, I could certainly recommend some very specific books that helped me. But I would say that get quiet, pray about it. And then I would say, go pursue some different places. See what feels home to you. You know, go visit a church, go visit a synagogue if that's appropriate for you. And go visit, and I think you'll find your home when you take action. But in life, we need to get in motion and take action to make something change in our lives. And so, go do something about it. Stop just sitting there contemplating. Get quiet, get some answers, and then go try, go do something.

• 1:12:01Jamie Kern Lima?

  So good and so true. And I think what you just said is really powerful. That's my own experience with going from doubting God exists for many years to then knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt He exists. But part of that was going to different churches, seeing what actually felt right. Because you feel it, you feel it.

• 1:12:16Ed Mylett?

  You feel it.

• 1:12:17Jamie Kern Lima?

  You can't fake it.

• 1:12:17Ed Mylett?

  You can't fake it. You'll feel your home when you're home, and I did too. I was raised in one particular church, and then went to another and another. And then I found what was my home. Same thing.

• 1:12:27Jamie Kern Lima?

  All right, you talk about taking action. I want to talk about in the power of one more.

• 1:12:32Ed Mylett?

  Okay.

• 1:12:33Jamie Kern Lima?

  Okay, first of all, let me just say something, okay? This is the clean version. My original version is marked up. There's like thousands of highlights, notes. Yes, all the things in there. And so this is the printed last night with just, I don't know how many markers in here.

• 1:12:49Ed Mylett?

  Thank you.

• 1:12:50Jamie Kern Lima?

  But on page 38, you say, "Few things are more expensive than opportunities you miss. You pay for them with regret, doubt, and lingering haunting, a lingering haunting feeling of what could have been." So my question, has there been a moment in your journey that you should have stepped into one more, but you failed to do so? And what did you learn from that?

• 1:13:19Ed Mylett?

  Tons, yeah, there's a lot. The good news is there's redemption too, if you keep pursuing the one more's. I can tell you one where I should have fixed something I did. So I always tell you vulnerable stuff. My son, and my son was a golfer, or is a golfer, but was when he was young. He had done something in a golf course that I thought he should have made a different decision, and I couldn't believe I did this, but when he was done playing, I let him know it really aggressively. Like, I cannot, I remember what it was, too. I said, "I cannot believe you hit a three wood there with the lake in front of the green. What the heck were you thinking?" And I start railing into my son, who's just trying to make me proud of him golfing.

• 1:14:00Ed Mylett?

  And I rail into him, and like every mistake you make as a parent, you just like, that's the biggest mistakes of your life, like, I should have handled that differently. And anyway, this may seem super small, but it's massive to me. And so it was a Sunday, and I had to go on a business trip that night. And I had the opportunity to walk in his room before I left. And to fix it. And to say, "I'm sorry." "That's not how your daddy should talk to you. I'm so proud of you. I love you. I know you were trying your best." "I can't even talk about this right now because I'm so mortified by me." And I was still mad at him. Over, I think he was 11. How ridiculous. And I left on the business trip. And I was gone a week.

• 1:14:44Ed Mylett?

  And he mentioned to his mom every morning that I said that to him. And it just festered in him for a week. And that was one more opportunity for me to go in and say, "I'm sorry. I made a mistake. And I wasn't man enough to do it." And that's a huge regret in my life. It seems really small. Because I know that little incident, even though I fixed it eventually, stays in there. It stays in there. And that was a huge mistake of mine, so I regret that I did that. And there's a bunch of business ones or major deals I didn't do or something I didn't invest in. There's lots like that. But I don't really care about all that stuff. I care about my son. And so there's been a couple instances like that in my life where I'm like, "You should have apologized." So, the one more's I regret most are the times where I didn't say I was wrong.

• 1:15:29Ed Mylett?

  Not decisions I didn't make or, you know, business deals I didn't pursue. There's, of course, there's things like that. But it's where I was like, uh, I didn't have the humility in the moment to go, "Wait a minute. I could have actually fixed it in the car." I knew I was wrong right when I did it. We've all done this as a parent, haven't we? As a parent, you're like, "I know what I'm saying," or to a spouse. "I know right now this is wrong." And out of pride or ego or whatever it is, we don't fix it in the moment. I should have, right when the words left my mouth, I knew I should. I saw his little face change. I saw his face change. And I should have went, "Oh, my gosh. Daddy is so wrong. Let me pull the car over. Come here. Sit on my lap. I love you. Daddy is totally wrong right now. You were trying so hard out there. I have no idea why I talked to you like that. I'm so sorry. Do you hear me? I love you.

• 1:16:14Ed Mylett?

  I love you. You're amazing." But I didn't do it. I didn't do it then. I didn't do it before I left. And it took me a week until I got back to fix it. Well, that sat in my son for a week. That poison I gave him. Right? And so, I'm telling you all kinds of stuff today that I don't normally say. But right when you asked me that, that stood out to me. Number one time as a dad, I was like, "That was terrible."

• 1:16:35Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 1:16:36Ed Mylett?

  So, that's one.

• 1:16:37Jamie Kern Lima?

  Well, it's relatable and really powerful. Right when you said it, I'm like, yep, or your spouse, or right away.

• 1:16:44Ed Mylett?

  That one stood up.

• 1:16:45Jamie Kern Lima?

  All right, so this is a really big, oh my gosh. Ed, I could talk about the chapters in this book for like 500 shows, but you know, chapter seven, "One More Dream." You talk about, this is page 91, "Entering Your Dream State." So you say, "The happiest people in life operate out of their imaginations and dreams and not their histories."

• 1:17:08Ed Mylett?

  Yep.

• 1:17:09Jamie Kern Lima?

  Can you just talk about imagination and this dimension of dream state? And also like, how does it apply to your own creative process? Because I think people will find this fascinating. A lot of questions, and a lot of people DM me about what's Ed's creative process.

• 1:17:27Ed Mylett?

  My creative process is I'm a dreamer. So this, we're not going to get into stuff I am good at. So, most people, I'll repeat this again, operate out of their history and their memory, not their imagination and their dreams. So, they're constantly replaying patterns and thoughts and emotions from the past that regenerate themselves, limiting beliefs about themselves. Whereas in my case, I do do that, but I'm really, really good at imagination. Dreaming is one thing. So, people say all the time, "Well, I dream at night." I dream in the daytime, and I dream a lot. And dreaming is a muscle. So I am in dream mode a lot of the time. I'm driving in the car, I bet you're this way too, Jamie. I'm just dreaming and envisioning my life often, the future, the things I want to do. It's a muscle I built, it's habitual. Also being habitual is rearview mirror replaying some situation you regret,

• 1:18:12Ed Mylett?

  replaying an emotion you don't want. That's habitual, a memory over and over and over. And the reason it's so emotional for me to talk about the stuff with my dad is that I truly do spend most of my time in the dream, in the imagination, in the future, being present, operating in the present, imagining the future. I don't spend most of my time, you know, living back in my memories and my history, even though I know there's an unconscious program running in there. I don't stay back there a lot. I don't stay back there in previous achievements or previous failures. So, lucid dreaming is a muscle. And imagination is different. Imagination is something you have

• 1:18:47Ed Mylett?

  ...an abundance of when you were a child. It's why you were happier as a child in my belief system for two reasons. One, your proximity to God was just a few years ago. Okay, so you were closer to God many years ago, so you were happier and more joyous. And two, your imagination was flourishing as a child. And the world, your parents, schoolteachers, started to suppress it. This is what's important. Read history, do math, be a good girl, stop dreaming, get, sit in your chair, write those spelling words down, whatever it is. And now over time, we get to a certain age, like, we don't imagine at all anymore, or very little. What percentage of your time when you were seven, were you in imagination mode? And what percentage of your time at this current age are you imagining?

• 1:19:32Ed Mylett?

  Dreaming, imagining, envisioning? And so for me, imagination is where the topics come from, the speeches come from, what I teach comes from, from imagination. If I'm in history, nothing bothers me more than to watch a speaker or a coach repeat themselves from four years ago. "I already got that one, man, I already got that one, lady, you said that 20 years ago." A little bit of that's okay, but like, I always feel like if I'm not showing up new and different, my values diminish because you already had that version of me. So, this imagination and dreaming, and by the way, I have friends that are too, "Hey, look at this, how about this thought, how about this place, how about this charity, how about this..." You and I were doing it last night on the phone together. We're imagining and dreaming, it's the best state, it's when we're the most alive.

• 1:20:16Ed Mylett?

  When we're in history and memory, we're literally dying. Because you're either growing or dying as a human being, it's just a fact. And so, you've got to begin to dream, lucid dreams in the daytime. I have a part of the book that's, be a possibility and impossibility thinker and achiever. Like, start to just let it go, let the imagination go, like, if there weren't barriers, if there weren't obstacles, if you didn't have anything holding you back, what would you be imagining? What would you be dreaming? Where would you be going? By the way, it's a great place to go. History and memory is like some fabrication most of the time anyway, or a sad place. So where you're going is awesome. Most people give themselves zero gift of imagination and dreaming, or they only do it when they sleep.

• 1:21:01Ed Mylett?

  And when you're asleep, you're not always in control of what that dream is. But when you're awake, you can direct the dream. And dreams, to me, are a form of prayer.

• 1:21:13Ed Mylett?

  You want to go to vibrational frequency? There's an energy to a dream. A thought has energy. A dream has energy. An imagination has energy. You are literally beginning to create something out of nothing when you imagine and dream it. When you have a thought, or an imagination, or a dream of something, you actually create a space that exists in time that didn't exist before the imagination or the dream. And so now that that space exists, your subconscious, unconscious mind, your reticular activating system, which is chapter 2 in the book, starts to try to furnish the space. It starts trying to put the people, places, and things in this space that you just created that didn't exist the minute before you had the thought or the dream.

• 1:21:54Ed Mylett?

  So you're creating new spaces in your life constantly when you imagine and dream. If I could get anything across, I'm so glad you brought this chapter, humans need to begin to imagine it. Think about people you admire. You admire Oprah Winfrey, right? I admire Dr. Martin Luther King. I also admire Oprah. But most of the people that you admire, they're dreamers. They've got big imaginations. The people that you really look up to, you look up to some, you know, political person, or actor, entertainer, or somebody that you know, they've got a vivid imagination. They're a vivid dreamer. My hero literally is famous for saying, "I have a dream." Come on, man! I mean, that's incredible. So, that's the part of life where all the juices...

• 1:22:38Ed Mylett?

  You can hear even my energy change when we talk about this topic. It's where you're the most alive, and it's where you're supposed to be is dreaming. Dreaming in the future, operating in the present.

• 1:22:49Jamie Kern Lima?

  It is so powerful. And just saying that when you dream, right? Daydream, or dream a dream that your reticular activating system goes to furnish that space.

• 1:22:59Ed Mylett?

  Absolutely, yes.

• 1:22:59Jamie Kern Lima?

  So true. I'm just thinking of so many times in my life that's happened, but I'm imagining so many people listening to us right now, they're like, "Oh, gosh, I gotta start dreaming." Like, "What have I been doing?" It's free!

• 1:23:11Ed Mylett?

  It's free!

• 1:23:11Jamie Kern Lima?

  It's free!

• 1:23:12Ed Mylett?

  It's the highest form of entertainment, and it's completely free, and it's the best thing you could ever give your soul, and your spirit, and yourself to change your life, and there's no cost to it.

• 1:23:19Jamie Kern Lima?

  Hmm, that's beautiful. Life-changing for a lot of people today.

• 1:23:25Ed Mylett?

  Yeah, I hope so.

• 1:23:25Jamie Kern Lima?

  Even just starting it, baby steps even.

• 1:23:28Ed Mylett?

  I hope so.

• 1:23:28Jamie Kern Lima?

  And you talk about... I have two really fun rounds that I want to do before I close. But one thing I want to say, Ed, that I think is really unique to you. And I know that you haven't always been this way, and maybe it's part of your own growth. But I feel like you do something I rarely ever see done publicly. And that's that you are not afraid to show vulnerability. You're not afraid to show sort of these beautiful, what would normally look like contrasting things. And what I mean by that is you're this dude with muscles. And then you're like narrating your two Pomeranians day, Daisy and Lily, right?

• 1:24:13Jamie Kern Lima?

  You are, you know, you're setting the stadium like on fire. People just, their lives are being so impacted. And then you're also very introverted. You know what I mean? There's kind of this contrast. You do it so well, I think, even with, you know, sharing real direct, you know, very direct, confident statements, or tools, or tips. But then you'll share how, you know, you're not feeling so well. And, you know, this is happening. It's sort of this contrast of showing all sides of you. And I'm just, you know, I'm just wondering how you got to that place? Because a lot of people are scared.

• 1:24:55Jamie Kern Lima?

  They show up, not just on social media, but in their day-to-day lives as part of who they are, but not as all of who they are. How did you get to this place of showing up like, and with a confidence as all of who you are?

• 1:25:09Ed Mylett?

  Great question. I'm, um, most people are pretty complex, and I am. I mean, there's a lot of simple things about me. But I'm a pretty complicated person in that sense. Like, I am really, really intense. And then I'm, hopefully, you know, a pretty kind person. I think that I do it because I just got tired of trying to pretend I was perfect. I just got tired of it. Like, I, I want people to have hope, not idolization. And so I want people to go, you know, hey, if this guy-

• 1:25:41Jamie Kern Lima?

  Hold on, hold on. You want people to have hope, not idolization?

• 1:25:46Ed Mylett?

  Right.

• 1:25:46Jamie Kern Lima?

  How many people out there right now are just- That's not their priority. That is huge, Ed, what you just said.

• 1:25:53Ed Mylett?

  Thank you. It's, well, and the people that were my idols, once I met them, I was like, whoa, wait a minute here. Right? So, I, uh, I want people to go, hey, um, this is a flawed, imperfect person, which we all are. And man, I'm watching this guy fight to really change who he is and get better and grow. And he's got, obviously, learned a lot of tools for doing it. In fact, the reason that I'm so into personal development, self-improvement, self-confidence, all these other things, is for me to just become a baseline functioning person, I had to have these tools. And then when I got to baseline, I'm like, well, wait a minute. Maybe we could take this further and actually be, you know, happier and successful. So, I want to show that, I want to be able to, not show, it's not even showing, it really isn't. It's just like, here it is.

• 1:26:38Ed Mylett?

  I'm not consciously like, I'm gonna show. I, I'm just like, this is me. Like, I'm a really intense dude, I love to compete, but I really love people. And also, I think, over time, as we age, we change. You know, I think, you know, the 25-year-old me probably would be totally unwilling. I don't know, maybe that's not true. I think a lot of people would tell you, even then, I was that way. But maybe I'm a little bit more unafraid to just say, hey, listen, I have fears and insecurities, and I made this mistake with my son, and, you know, I love God, and I love my dad, and, you know, I have fears, and I think that, hopefully, by hearing those things, you go, well, man, if he could do it, I could do it. This is not some perfect person. He's got it all figured out.

• 1:27:20Ed Mylett?

  I will just say this, I've got some things figured out, and that's better than I used to be. And if I could give you what I know, maybe I could save you a bunch of time. A bunch of mistakes I made. Speed up your happiness and success through all the mistakes I've made. So, I also like, love people like you. And, and this is where all this kind of comes together. I love really confident people, who have a ton of humility. And I don't love confident people who don't have humility. And I'm not really interested in being around a bunch of humble people who have no self-confidence. Self-confident people who have humility are curious. They want to learn, they want to grow. Self-confident person without that, they're hard to be around. You know this. And they eventually probably make a mistake, or burn out, or whatever.

• 1:28:05Ed Mylett?

  And then our humble friends, who we love so much, they're just hard to take through life with you if they have no self-confidence. It's like, "Come on, you can do it, let's go." And so I love people who tread that nuance really well. You do that as well as anybody I've ever met before. Like, there's this strength of a woman in there. Like, there's this... And I've watched you, like, defend me in different situations. Like, there's this really strong, confident woman who knows who she is. But so humble, so much humility, that she still has this other part of her that's, you know, "Am I?", and also wants to learn, wants to grow. Values other people, right?

• 1:28:47Ed Mylett?

  Like, humility is, I think, sometimes just the value of other people. And when you have all this self-confidence and no humility, it's like, "Are you the most important person?"

• 1:28:55Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 1:28:56Ed Mylett?

  You know? So, hopefully, over time, I've nuanced that pretty well.

• 1:28:59Jamie Kern Lima?

  I think it's beautiful. I mean, even when you're doing animal voices on your... I think it's beautiful, because I think people at home are like, "Oh, I do that too." And I think it's just this beautiful, kind of like, showing all sides. And, you know, I want to say, it's obviously no accident, millions and millions of people connect with you, your shows. And you are one of the few people who does a really good job at showing both sides of things. You'll have somebody, you know, you're talking about politics. You'll have somebody extremely left one day, and the next day, someone extremely right.

• 1:29:32Ed Mylett?

  Yeah.

• 1:29:32Jamie Kern Lima?

  You'll show both sides of everything, never even sharing where you're at. And you, you know, I've always felt this, and this has always kind of just been dumbfounding to me, that... I feel like the quickest way to get dull in life is to only surround yourself with people that think the way you do.

• 1:29:51Ed Mylett?

  Yes.

• 1:29:52Jamie Kern Lima?

  Right? And so many people only surround themselves with people who think the way that they do.

• 1:29:56Ed Mylett?

  Oh, that's the thing to do now, isn't it?

• 1:29:58Jamie Kern Lima?

  It is right now.

• 1:29:59Ed Mylett?

  You'll only be around people who share your political beliefs, your spiritual beliefs, your life beliefs. You know what's real, the truth, and you know this, you ain't learning very much from them. You very rarely learn anything from anybody who completely agrees with you on everything.

• 1:30:13Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 1:30:14Ed Mylett?

  And even in your companies, you know this, when we're building the company, I want people who disagree with me. I want people who challenge me. I want people with a diverse background. I want people who come at it from a completely different perspective.

• 1:30:22Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 1:30:23Ed Mylett?

  And so, I have lots, as you know, and so do you, and we laugh about some of our mutual friends that disagree with stuff with each other. My dad and I disagreed on a lot of stuff. One of the most interesting, fascinating things about my dad was, we didn't agree on political things all the time. We certainly didn't agree on religious things all the time. Our outlook on all kinds of stuff was very different. To say that my dad and I are the same person in that regard isn't true. My favorite person, you know, that, an adult person in my life is my dad, and me and him disagreed on lots of stuff. And I learned lots of stuff. And some of the things, over time, I do think more like him again. You know, but I don't want people around me all the time who agree with me, and I don't want people all the time who just agree with everything I think. How boring.

• 1:31:08Ed Mylett?

  You're right, no, you're right, no, you're right, oh, we're both right.

• 1:31:11Jamie Kern Lima?

  We're both right.

• 1:31:12Ed Mylett?

  Isn't this crazy? And they're so this, and they're so that.

• 1:31:14Jamie Kern Lima?

  It's destiny.

• 1:31:15Ed Mylett?

  And it is so our culture now, isn't it?

• 1:31:17Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yes.

• 1:31:18Ed Mylett?

  Like, you know, it's so our culture. And like, and every facet is trying to put us in these camps, like, you're over there, you're one of those, you're one of those, I'm one of these, and you st- man, that is absolutely not how this thing's supposed to work.

• 1:31:31Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 1:31:32Ed Mylett?

  Absolutely 100% counter to how the world is supposed to work. I promise you, of all the things we talked about today, I'm the most sure of what I'm telling you right now, that we are supposed to be different. There's supposed to be diversity of thought, of behavior, of background, of culture, of religion, of ethnicity. The diversity in our world is the strength of this world. And if there was ever a leader who rose up and said, "I'm embracing that, and I'm not even gonna let you play your game where you're pitted against one another."

• 1:32:00Jamie Kern Lima?

  Yeah.

• 1:32:01Ed Mylett?

  Oh, man, would we change the world.

• 1:32:03Jamie Kern Lima?

  Well, speaking of that, I mean, I know you are, you are- You are paid to counsel country leaders, which I won't go into that. But what I will ask you on what you just said is maybe the billion-dollar question of the day. Will you ever run for office?

• 1:32:22Ed Mylett?

  Oh, yeah. Probably not. Probably not. I'm not gonna say I never would. If I thought like, if I thought doing that, if I thought doing that would make a bigger difference in the world, or I could be utilized to make a bigger difference, if that time ever arose, I would do it. But I don't think that time will arise. I think my platform and the freedom of that platform probably allows me to make a bigger contribution and a bigger difference anyway. And the truth is, in the way that the political world works right now, I'm not so sure that I fit in anywhere specifically. So I doubt that that's the case. What's that?

• 1:33:00Jamie Kern Lima?

  Maybe that's a good thing.

• 1:33:01Ed Mylett?

  Maybe that is a good thing. So I would say probably, I'd say, don't hold your breath on that one. You never know. You never say never. But right now, definitely, I could tell you this, for one more day, I'm definitely not. That I know.

• 1:33:13Jamie Kern Lima?

  All right. Page 189 on the book, in the book, The Power of One More, one of my favorite quotes in the whole book. Dare to challenge yourself to make history. How will Ed Mylett make history?

• 1:33:31Ed Mylett?

  Wow. Come on, Jamie. These are good questions. I'll, I'll make his, if I ever make history, if I make history, it will be by leveraging the beautiful talents and skills and backgrounds of other people. It wouldn't be me. It would be my ability to gather people who could do something collectively great together. I'm a really big believer in the collective soul, the collective mind, more than I am one person doing something. And I think that's another part of our culture that's gotten really skewed as well. So if I'm gonna make history, it will be like what my dad did. It'll just be by helping one person at a time. And with their life, be happier or more successful, or see more, be more seen, or achieve their

• 1:34:16Ed Mylett?

  ...potential and I will do that by gathering the skills and talents of a lot of other people. And I'm not, when I say do something historic in your life, what I mean by saying that to you is that you should have a sense of the historic, meaning you are making history. Your life is being documented. There's a book being written about you. If you're a person of faith like you and I, we know that there's an accounting, there's a book of our life happening. Even if you don't believe any of that stuff, someone's probably paying attention somewhere, right? So at some point, if your great-grandchildren came along and read the book of your life, if it ended right now, if the final chapter were right now on the book of you, would you be satisfied with the totality of that book? Have all the best chapters been written or are there better ones to write? And if there are better ones to write, what are you doing to write them better?

• 1:35:00Ed Mylett?

  What book, what resource, what podcast, what friends, what decision, what one more emotion, what one more thought are you looking for to write the best chapters of your life? And the good news about this book of you is it's not over if you're listening to this. The other good news is there's two co-authors, you and God. And any chance you want, you can write a new chapter. You can be a whole new character. You can flip the script like I did at some point. You just decide to step in and write the best chapters of your life. At any point, you as the author of this, the chapters don't have to repeat themselves. But right now, if your great-grandkids came along and read that book, would they pick it up and go, "Wow, look at that moment." Like I would with my dad. "Look at that family he helped. Look at that person he helped." Quietly, "Look at that change. Look at, look how he lived those 15 years of his son's life." And then look at the next part.

• 1:35:45Ed Mylett?

  Or in your life, would the chapters just start kind of running together? At some point, one chapter looked like the other, looked like the other, and they go, "This is a little bit boring." And would they put the book down? Would they be inspired? Because there's four types of people. There's unmotivated. Then there's motivated people, which are wonderful. They're driven by motives. "I want to achieve this to get that." Then there's inspirational people. These are people who are moved in spirit, right? Those are amazing human beings. They move people with energy and spirit. Then there's the highest level, which is aspirational. Where people aspire to be more like you, aspire to be like you. When someone read your book right now, would they say you were unmotivated? Motivated, inspirational, or how about aspirational?

• 1:36:29Ed Mylett?

  That eventually when your great grandkids read that book of your life, they go, "I want to be more like grandma." Or great grandma, she was courageous. She helped people, she grew, she took risks, she changed. She loved people, she cared about people, she was special. Just like my sister who's the schoolteacher, or just like her brother me, in different ways. That book of your life, you're the author of, and it's supposed to be a masterpiece. And you can get to writing the best chapters now, right now. And my dad proved it. First 35 years or so of his life, one way, the second half, magnificent.

• 1:37:05Jamie Kern Lima?

  Well, on the topic of your book, I just want to be a friend one more time.

• 1:37:08Ed Mylett?

  Okay, do it.

• 1:37:09Jamie Kern Lima?

  I want to tell everyone, because people don't know this. I learned after I wrote my own book, people don't know that it is so important for everyone who wants to support you, right? Who is part of your community and loves your content, just wants to champion you. A lot of people wonder, "What can I do for Ed?" Ed pours into me every single day of my life, "What can I do for Ed?" What you can do for Ed, let me just say it, and he doesn't know I'm going to say this, but I'm going to say it. Is buy his book. And don't just buy it, it's so important to either preorder it, or order it as close to the release date as possible. So, you know, if it's just coming out this week, when you're listening to this, or we're a week or two after, when it's launched, you want to buy it right now. A lot of people don't know that for authors, it's so important to either preorder it

• 1:37:53Jamie Kern Lima?

  or buy it as close to the launch date as possible. Because that's how retailers will keep their inventory, make sure it doesn't sell out. That's how they know there's demand. I know you're uncomfortable with me saying this, but I'm just going to say it. Because, you know, we're all friends here. You've got to be there for your friends, right? And when it comes to making any of the lists, right? The Wall Street Journal, all the different lists, they often gauge the sales, most of all, in the beginning, so. Show up for Ed. We're all gonna show up for Ed. And grab a copy of The Power of One More. Not only because it's gonna change your life, but also it's just a beautiful way to support you. And if you're able to grab it, grab it as soon as you can. And I shared this earlier, but my favorite thing to do is, like in my Amazon Dropbox, or you can do this even on Target.com,

• 1:38:37Jamie Kern Lima?

  Barnes & Noble.com, this is in a lot of independent bookstores. I'll just go on, you know, some people I just wanna bless, or say, you know, "I'm thinking of you", and I'll click on their address and ship them a book. So it's a beautiful thing to give and to share. And I wanna thank you for sharing your heart today.

• 1:38:56Ed Mylett?

  Jamie, Jamie, thank you for doing this today. For your preparation, I love you. You're such a wonderful friend. And showing up for me to do this, you know that I would only do this with you. And showing up makes me just appreciate you showing up so much for me on so many different things that no one here knows about. But you're the most generous, giving, kind person. And to share this time with you, it's my favorite interview ever that's ever been on my show, or that I've ever been a part of, ever. And I usually get other people crying on my show. You actually got me crying on my own show today. But I really, really, really, truly love you, and I'm grateful for you. So thank you so much for doing this for me today.

• 1:39:37Jamie Kern Lima?

  Thank you. You see that in me because that's what's in you, right? So, and I think everyone knows that, so thank you. Thank you, I love you, I'm excited for you, proud of you, and yeah.

• 1:39:48Ed Mylett?

  All right. Max out, everybody.

• 1:39:50Speaker 02

  This is The Ed Mylett Show.