Dan Soder

Dan Soder—comedian, actor, and the guy your favorite podcasters call when they need a real laugh. A powerhouse of sharp wit and effortless storytelling, Soder made waves on Billions as Mafee, dominated the stand-up scene with his HBO special Son of a Gary, and crushed it on The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson. Whether he's riffing on the absurdity of life, dropping wrestling references, or delivering that signature deadpan humor, Soder is the real deal. Catch him live, catch him on a pod, just don’t catch him without a tallboy in hand. #dansoder #andrewsantino #whiskeyginger #podcast ============================================================== Sponsor Whiskey Ginger: https://public.liveread.io/media-kit/whiskeyginger SUPPORT OUR SPONSORS BETTER HELP 10% OFF YOUR 1ST MONTH https://betterhelp.com/whiskey MANDO $5 OFF YOUR ORDER WITH PROMO CODE: WHISKEY https://shopmando.com RIDGE WALLET GET 40% OFF YOUR ORDER & TELL THEM WE SENT YA! https://ridge.com/whiskeyginger NORD VPN 4 MONTHS FREE WITH A 2 YEAR PLAN https://nordvpn.com/whiskey ======================================= Follow Andrew Santino: https://www.instagram.com/cheetosantino/ https://twitter.com/CheetoSantino Follow Whiskey Ginger: https://www.instagram.com/whiskeygingerpodcast https://twitter.com/whiskeygingerpodcast Produced and edited by Joe Faria https://www.instagram.com/itsjoefaria Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

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• 0:36Speaker 00

  Let's be honest, you don't go to the holiday gift exchange just to participate. You go to win. This year, cause a stir. Gift a KitchenAid stand mixer to whip up new traditions. 'Tis your season to mix it up.

• 0:49Speaker 01

  In here, we pour whiskey, whiskey, whiskey, whiskey, whiskey.

• 0:55Speaker 02

  Who's that creature in the ginger beard?

• 0:57Speaker 03

  Sturdy and ginger. Like that, the ginger gene is cursed.

• 1:01Speaker 04

  Ginger's a beauty. You owe me $5 for the whiskey, $75 for the horse. Ginger's a hell no.

• 1:08Speaker 02

  This whiskey is excellent. Ginger, I like gingers.

• 1:14Andrew Santino?

  All right, here we go. Hey, Joe! Say hi to my editor Joe in that camera right there.

• 1:18Speaker 06

  Hi, Joe.

• 1:18Andrew Santino?

  That's Joe.

• 1:19Speaker 06

  Joseph.

• 1:19Andrew Santino?

  Joe, he used to live in Fall River, Mass., but now he lives in Providence, Rhode Island.

• 1:24Speaker 06

  Oh, so he's definitely got the fucking accent.

• 1:27Andrew Santino?

  He's got a little bit of Boston. When he gets drunk, it definitely comes out. I feel the same way. If I get a little bit buzzed up, Chicago comes out a little bit more.

• 1:36Speaker 06

  Is that where you start talking like a North Chicago cat?

• 1:37Andrew Santino?

  That's where I say, dude, these guys over there, you never know about those guys. Over there, "there" is probably the greatest word. "Over there." That's probably the best, "there" is probably the best Chicago word that's not a word. "There, over there."

• 1:50Speaker 06

  That was the first accent that I learned through SNL because of the super fans. Because I was in Colorado where everyone has a broadcaster's accent.

• 2:00Andrew Santino?

  It is weird. No one in Colorado has, there is no Denver.

• 2:02Speaker 06

  No.

• 2:03Andrew Santino?

  What is because no one's really from Denver historically. It's the same thing with Arizona.

• 2:07Speaker 06

  Yeah, it's just all these.

• 2:08Andrew Santino?

  Well, it is. Arizona, Nevada.

• 2:10Speaker 06

  Land grab.

• 2:11Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, land grab. But I used to have a joke that said, if you are a white person who's like, history is Arizona.

• 2:20Speaker 06

  The Four Corners.

• 2:20Andrew Santino?

  Nevada, yeah. If you're a white person from there.

• 2:22Speaker 06

  Utah, Colorado, Arizona.

• 2:24Andrew Santino?

  Your great, great, great grandparents just gave up. They were gonna go west for gold and they were like, this is good.

• 2:27Speaker 06

  So funny to watch. Let's turn off here.

• 2:30Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, dude.

• 2:30Speaker 06

  What fort is this?

• 2:32Andrew Santino?

  This is fine.

• 2:34Speaker 06

  We'll raise a family here in these plains.

• 2:36Andrew Santino?

  How many more mountain ranges do we have to go through to get to the gold?

• 2:40Speaker 06

  Yeah, it was, growing up in Denver, I, I love Denver. I think it's a great city. I got mad when people were moving there and I didn't even live there anymore. I was like getting mad like, stop.

• 2:50Andrew Santino?

  You don't know what you know about our Nevada, dude.

• 2:52Speaker 06

  Let it be perfect. Leave little bit alone. Leave it alone. Yeah, but I love going back. My mom's still there and I have a lot of family there and it's a great place to like,

• 3:01Andrew Santino?

  It's the best.

• 3:02Speaker 06

  Visit, but I don't think I could ever live there.

• 3:04Andrew Santino?

  Really? I'm the opposite. I definitely want to live there. I definitely will, will live there at some point.

• 3:08Speaker 06

  No, but what about you going back to Chicago? Could you live in Chicago again?

• 3:11Andrew Santino?

  No, but that's because of our winters, dude. You don't have fucking winters.

• 3:14Speaker 06

  Colorado is winter?

• 3:15Andrew Santino?

  No, doggy.

• 3:16Speaker 06

  Oh, no, you're right. It doesn't have like.

• 3:18Andrew Santino?

  It doesn't have like a fucking.

• 3:19Speaker 06

  Well, there's no humidity there. It shits down. Listen, there's, there's snowstorms.

• 3:23Andrew Santino?

  I know, I've been there. I've been, my wife's from Denver. I've spent so much time there. Yeah, dude, but it's just, I don't.

• 3:28Speaker 06

  Where'd your wife go to Creek?

• 3:31Speaker 06

  What high school did she go to?

• 3:32Andrew Santino?

  I can't remember the name of it now.

• 3:33Speaker 06

  Cherry Creek? I think she went to Cherry.

• 3:34Andrew Santino?

  No, no, not Cherry Creek. Uh.

• 3:37Andrew Santino?

  Fuck, I'll, I'll, no.

• 3:38Speaker 06

  Not Columbine. You remember that one.

• 3:40Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah.

• 3:42Speaker 06

  You remember that shit. That's what sucks is like.

• 3:44Andrew Santino?

  Columbine gets a bad rap now, even though it was like, it's such a beautiful place.

• 3:47Speaker 06

  It's very nice.

• 3:48Andrew Santino?

  It's so pretty.

• 3:49Speaker 06

  It is funny though, like, the, what you're known for, like Chicago, people are like, ah, bears, pizza, hot dogs. You're like, I'm from Colorado and like mass shooting?

• 3:59Andrew Santino?

  Movie theater shootings?

• 4:01Speaker 06

  Yeah, which is Aurora.

• 4:02Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, that, that's.

• 4:03Speaker 06

  That was at the Aurora Mall.

• 4:05Andrew Santino?

  Aren't you right near there? You're right there, yeah.

• 4:06Speaker 06

  My mom lives right off 225, dude. Still around, right there.

• 4:10Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, but I could handle the winters in Colorado, but the winters in Chicago when I go back, it's not like I couldn't handle them. It's just living in this bullshit this long, I don't want to anymore.

• 4:17Speaker 06

  It's pretty sweet.

• 4:18Andrew Santino?

  Dude, this is the best. It was 78 degrees today. It's February 25th or whatever the fuck.

• 4:23Speaker 06

  For all the bullshit you guys have here, going outside and you're like. I was like, I was like walking up, you know what it made me feel like? Cause you went to ASU. It made me feel like those February days in Tucson when I lived there and you'd be like, oh, I'm wearing a T-shirt and it's 78, 80 degrees.

• 4:38Andrew Santino?

  Palm tree swing.

• 4:39Speaker 06

  Yeah. And you're just like, but the way I came through the back, I was like, oh, this made me feel like old school. Like I should be smoking a cigarette. I felt, I felt 20 years younger, Andrew.

• 4:47Andrew Santino?

  This place does do something to you where it does reset me in the morning. Like if I am on a bummer trail and I'm just like low. I have coffee and, and take the dog for a walk and play with the dog in the morning. I'm reset immediately.

• 4:59Speaker 06

  My walks with my dog that are going on just on the other side of the country are like we're on a moon base. And I'm like gearing up, I'm gearing up the dog and I'm like, we're gonna go out there. The second you let out shit, we are moving right back. Like it's an expedition.

• 5:15Andrew Santino?

  You only have so much oxygen left. You're like, we need to cut.

• 5:18Speaker 06

  Come on, bud. Just fucking breathe it in, Myrtle. It's like. Yeah, it sucks dude. And New York City walks are, you will routinely pull a chicken bone out of your dog's mouth.

• 5:30Andrew Santino?

  Oh, bro, that's so funny.

• 5:31Speaker 06

  She'll look down, she'll be like, and I'll be like, Myrtle, what are you doing? And then I'll pull full fucking bone out, dude. She just yanked it from the curb. It sucks.

• 5:40Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, but, but.

• 5:41Speaker 06

  It sucks.

• 5:41Andrew Santino?

  But at the same time, New York dog living, it's gotta be cool for the dogs. So many smells.

• 5:48Speaker 06

  They don't, oh, yeah.

• 5:49Andrew Santino?

  So many smells. New York dog living, they've got, like dude, if you take the dog to the park, how fun is that for the dog?

• 5:54Speaker 06

  They don't like, she doesn't like the, the park near us because it's like concrete. And we lived in Hoboken where there was like a good dog park.

• 6:01Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 6:02Speaker 06

  So she's used to that one. When I take her back there, it's like high school homecoming. She's like, oh, oh, I'm about to.

• 6:08Andrew Santino?

  She's back. She's back.

• 6:09Speaker 06

  Oh, the fucking, still got my good stuff. But living in New York, this smells, you're absolutely right. It, one block takes like 20 minutes. Cause she's like.

• 6:20Speaker 06

  She's like, what the fuck is this? And what's funny, she'll go where they leave large mountains of trash.

• 6:25Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 6:25Speaker 06

  And to her, it's just potpourri.

• 6:27Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, that's heaven, dude.

• 6:28Speaker 06

  She's like, hmm, oh, what is that food mixed with waste? Oh, take me on a trip.

• 6:33Andrew Santino?

  That does have to be so good. She's like, I'm in France now. Ooh, mon chéri.

• 6:37Speaker 06

  Transport me.

• 6:38Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, dude. I think for a dog, I think having a dog in the city though would be tough to take it on the walks when it's shit weather. Cause I get that. Even when we have shitty weather, if we have rain out here and stuff, it's annoying. Cause then they stink. When they're wet, they stink, dude.

• 6:53Speaker 06

  I don't have a sense of smell, so I fucking, that's why.

• 6:55Andrew Santino?

  Really?

• 6:56Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 6:56Andrew Santino?

  You still can't smell?

• 6:57Speaker 06

  Nothing.

• 6:57Andrew Santino?

  Covid?

• 6:59Speaker 06

  Mixed with years of cigarette smoking and exhaling primarily through my nose.

• 7:04Andrew Santino?

  But you, you.

• 7:04Speaker 06

  So it was my sense was.

• 7:05Andrew Santino?

  Taste buds are still there.

• 7:07Speaker 06

  Yeah, but they're like lowered because my.

• 7:09Andrew Santino?

  Whoa.

• 7:10Speaker 06

  Smoking cigarettes like that, like from when you're young, you're being cool as shit. But I would smoke, it's literally because I saw my dad do it once where he smoked, he took a drag of a cigarette and then he breathed it out his mouth and his nose.

• 7:23Andrew Santino?

  The dragon.

• 7:23Speaker 06

  And they conjoined.

• 7:24Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah.

• 7:24Speaker 06

  And I was like, I'm gonna smoke like that every drag. So it just became normal for me to breathe out both. And then I noticed my sense of smell was like dulling and then I got covid and it was gone.

• 7:36Andrew Santino?

  Gone. What is it called? What's it called where you, French inhale, right?

• 7:38Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah, all the time.

• 7:39Andrew Santino?

  Out and in the schnoz. It's great, dude.

• 7:41Speaker 06

  I love French inhale.

• 7:42Andrew Santino?

  And when you see a chick that can French inhale, you're like, holy shit, dude.

• 7:45Speaker 06

  You steal my stuff when I, when I fall asleep.

• 7:48Andrew Santino?

  Are you gonna stab me? Cause I'm chill about it.

• 7:49Speaker 06

  That, you're definitely the kind of person to put a phone to my face and unlock the bank app. Bloop, bloop.

• 7:55Andrew Santino?

  Thank you, dad.

• 7:56Speaker 06

  And wake up, I knew it from the French inhale. I knew I was gonna be bamboozled.

• 8:01Andrew Santino?

  What cigarettes did your dad smoke?

• 8:03Speaker 06

  Marble reds.

• 8:04Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, my dad was Winstons.

• 8:05Speaker 06

  Nice.

• 8:06Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, Winstons. And you know what the coolest version of smoking was?

• 8:09Speaker 06

  The red and white pack, right?

• 8:10Andrew Santino?

  That's right. Yeah, whatever the cheapest was. The coolest version of smoking was when people do this and then they tuck it down this way.

• 8:16Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah.

• 8:17Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, like this smoking is not as cool.

• 8:18Speaker 06

  It's fine.

• 8:19Andrew Santino?

  Scissors, fine.

• 8:19Speaker 06

  It's standard, holding it like that.

• 8:21Andrew Santino?

  Whoa, dude, coolest guy. When you see a guy cupping outside of a bar like alone, you're like, this guy's the man, dude.

• 8:27Speaker 06

  That guy's smoking to smoke.

• 8:28Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, he needs to smoke.

• 8:29Speaker 06

  Socializing.

• 8:30Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 8:31Speaker 06

  Cause nothing would piss me off more as a cigarette smoking than watching people not inhale. But like act like they're getting away with it where they go like.

• 8:39Andrew Santino?

  What's the point of that?

• 8:40Speaker 06

  And then they just push it out of their mouth.

• 8:42Andrew Santino?

  Smoke it.

• 8:43Speaker 06

  One time I went on a date with a girl and she did that and it blew the, I was like, what are you doing? You take a Camel Light of mine and you're gonna fucking, that's Turkish tobacco.

• 8:50Andrew Santino?

  Give me a dollar. You owe me a dollar.

• 8:52Speaker 06

  You know what's funny is back when I smoked, when someone would offer to buy a cigarette, I would bum them one. And if they asked to bum one, I wouldn't give them one.

• 8:59Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, that's really, this is funny. We used to have, the guy, Bijou, used to own the, uh, uh, mobile gas station by my first apartment. And we would always bum cigarettes, cause you know, we were, I didn't, never wanted to buy a pack, cause we were like.

• 9:11Speaker 06

  You didn't wanna commit?

• 9:12Andrew Santino?

  Well, we were scrounging for money. No, we were just some, we just, someone would buy a pack and then we'd all kinda steal it and then someone else. But I would buy, uh, um, I would buy, uh, uh, Lucy's from him. And he would, he would be, I'd be like, hey, can I get a Lucy? And he's like, if you smoke with me, I don't, I don't wanna, I will not charge you. So I would sit behind the gas station and smoke cigarettes. Yeah, but I'm also like, we're smoking at the gas station.

• 9:33Speaker 06

  Yeah, that's not smart.

• 9:34Andrew Santino?

  No, dude.

• 9:35Speaker 06

  I like, science wise.

• 9:36Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 9:36Speaker 06

  But what a good hang.

• 9:37Andrew Santino?

  It was rad. Bijou was the man.

• 9:39Speaker 06

  Dude, gas station stories?

• 9:40Andrew Santino?

  This guy was the man and he also, dude, trust me, that was my.

• 9:42Speaker 06

  You know I've drinking it.

• 9:43Andrew Santino?

  As much weed that I smoked in high school, all my life was at gas stations. My buddy, Billy, worked at a gas station up the street from my high school. We would just sit in the garages at night, smoke in the, you know, in the, in the, in the oil, oil garages. We'd sit and smoke weed. And then go get snacks from inside the gas station. Yeah.

• 9:58Speaker 06

  Can I tell you what I miss?

• 9:59Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 9:59Speaker 06

  The smell of gas.

• 10:00Andrew Santino?

  Me fucking too. I love gas.

• 10:02Speaker 06

  I just miss the smell of it.

• 10:03Andrew Santino?

  Oh, I love it, dude.

• 10:03Speaker 06

  Out of all the smells?

• 10:04Andrew Santino?

  Gas.

• 10:05Speaker 06

  I miss gas.

• 10:06Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 10:06Speaker 06

  Just get out and be like, fuck.

• 10:08Andrew Santino?

  It smells so good.

• 10:09Speaker 06

  Dude, I, uh.

• 10:10Andrew Santino?

  Some people don't like, it has, there's a percentage of people that it like is, uh, it makes them like nauseous.

• 10:16Speaker 06

  Oh, really?

• 10:16Andrew Santino?

  The smell of gas.

• 10:16Speaker 06

  I loved it my whole life. Probably that's why I don't have a sense of smell now.

• 10:20Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, dude.

• 10:20Speaker 06

  But, smoke, no one talks about the benefits of smoking. And one of the benefits of smoking is, at a job, you have an escape, like.

• 10:30Andrew Santino?

  A regulated break.

• 10:31Speaker 06

  When I worked, and I only did it one season, but I worked at a cannery in Alaska. I was driving a forklift for like the processing thing. And the head processor knew I always had cigarettes. And he'd be like, you have a cigarette? He'd be like, you come smoke, I would just get smoke breaks.

• 10:45Andrew Santino?

  That's awesome, dude.

• 10:46Speaker 06

  Cause Aladeen wanted to smoke a cigarette.

• 10:48Andrew Santino?

  Aladeen, that was his name?

• 10:49Speaker 06

  He had fucking four teeth on his bottom jaw. It was wild. It was wild. Guy was like four foot eight, ran the whole processing plant.

• 10:57Andrew Santino?

  Aladeen.

• 10:57Speaker 06

  He was a bad motherfucker.

• 10:58Andrew Santino?

  Rest in peace, for sure.

• 11:00Speaker 06

  Absolutely.

• 11:01Andrew Santino?

  Some people you haven't seen long enough, you're like, definitely dead.

• 11:04Speaker 06

  It's 22 years ago. Absolutely dead.

• 11:06Andrew Santino?

  Oh wait, by the way, that Bijou guy just reminded me, I remember, he bought a. He bought an E four fifty Benz. And and and I remember he was like bragging about how he really wanted to buy a Benz and he saved money to buy a Benz. And he worked at the gas station, wasn't his gas station, uh, for the reference. And, uh, he saved all this money, bought the E four fifty and he's like, uh, do you like? And I was like, yeah, it's cool. The room, the, the, the wheels were chrome. And I was like, I don't really love chrome. It's like big bubbly chrome. He's like, no, no, I will paint. I gonna paint. And I was like, oh, cool. Fuck yeah, dude. That's sick. You're gonna get him painted? He's like, no, no, I will paint. And I'm like, no, don't, you shouldn't do that. And he's like,

• 11:44Speaker 06

  That's not how that works.

• 11:45Andrew Santino?

  He's like, what? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm not kidding. A week later, I'm coming back from the Comedy Store. I'm like walking home. He's like, bro, bro, check it out. I look, dude, he's literally like, like a hand roller, has painted them on. But you could tell because it's like lumpy and liney and shit. And I'm like, Bijo, just get them fucking, get them like actually painted.

• 12:02Speaker 06

  Yeah, but you don't understand to him, that was his Mentos moment. He was like, stay frustrated, true. But Mentos fresh. He's like, hey, look what I did. It's like the suit one where he rolls on there. Fresh goes better. That was his moment where in a commercial that would all work out and you would have been like, oh, Bijo.

• 12:24Speaker 06

  That's how you start saying that guy's name. You go, Bijo.

• 12:27Andrew Santino?

  Let me see, by the way, just for fun, if I still have this guy's number in my phone, it just reminded me.

• 12:31Speaker 06

  Yes, dude.

• 12:32Andrew Santino?

  Brother, look at that. Bijo Salib. He's right. He's still there.

• 12:35Speaker 06

  Get him on the pod.

• 12:36Andrew Santino?

  Ah, dude, I should.

• 12:37Speaker 06

  Gas station stories.

• 12:38Andrew Santino?

  That guy was the man.

• 12:39Speaker 06

  That's what, that's, this is who we need podcast episodes from. So guys are like, I watched a man burn his wife with gasoline. No se ho on fire. And you're like, oh, my God. They're just like, oh, yeah, not a big deal.

• 12:52Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it happens. It will happen. I saw a girl on TikTok. She was like, is it true? That if you, if you fill up gas with your car on, something bad will happen? And she's on, she's on TikTok and her boyfriend is, is filling up gas. She turns the car on and is like revving the engine.

• 13:10Speaker 06

  Yeah, that's just.

• 13:11Andrew Santino?

  What are you, what are you doing?

• 13:12Speaker 06

  Now you're asking for it.

• 13:13Andrew Santino?

  Basically being like, is it true if I kill my boyfriend?

• 13:16Speaker 06

  What a stream. What a live stream.

• 13:19Andrew Santino?

  She was looking for the view.

• 13:21Speaker 06

  Oh, holy shit. Holy shit. If you were her mom, you'd be like, Aaron.

• 13:27Speaker 06

  Aaron, Aaron.

• 13:29Andrew Santino?

  Why is it Aaron? It's for sure Aaron.

• 13:30Speaker 06

  Aaron, Aaron, Aaron, come on. You blew up your damn Subaru.

• 13:35Andrew Santino?

  Aaron, Aaron, that's a name from our generation. That's our age range. Aaron, there's no Aaron's right now.

• 13:40Speaker 06

  You're right.

• 13:41Andrew Santino?

  There was, let me see.

• 13:42Speaker 06

  There were so many.

• 13:42Andrew Santino?

  Let's go, Lauren, Aaron.

• 13:44Speaker 06

  Ashley.

• 13:45Andrew Santino?

  Jamie, Ashley.

• 13:46Speaker 06

  Stephanie, Jennifer.

• 13:47Andrew Santino?

  Jen.

• 13:48Speaker 06

  There's gotta be, those names still have to be out there, right?

• 13:50Andrew Santino?

  No fucking way. Nobody under 20 now has named those names.

• 13:55Speaker 00

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• 14:30Speaker 06

  They're all like aspirin.

• 14:31Andrew Santino?

  Aspirin?

• 14:34Speaker 06

  Xs. And you're like, what the fuck? You just colognes?

• 14:37Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 14:37Speaker 06

  But that does make me feel, and sound old as fuck.

• 14:40Andrew Santino?

  No, but it's true.

• 14:41Speaker 06

  I remember Eric's.

• 14:42Andrew Santino?

  Right, right. But it is, no one does, I mean, by the way.

• 14:45Speaker 06

  But it does happen to everybody.

• 14:46Andrew Santino?

  My name's dead. Andrew's a dead name.

• 14:49Speaker 06

  Is it?

• 14:49Andrew Santino?

  There's no way Andrew's used anymore. How often do you meet an Andrew? Almost never. And in the newer generation, there's no fucking way this one made it. There's no way Andrew made it.

• 14:57Speaker 06

  I wonder how the old Daniel's doing.

• 15:00Andrew Santino?

  Dan is forever good because Catholics.

• 15:02Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 15:02Andrew Santino?

  You're always gonna get Dan because of Catholics.

• 15:04Speaker 06

  To be judged by God.

• 15:05Andrew Santino?

  Shout out, dude, our dog, our Lord and Savior. But Andrew's gotta be dead. Also, I didn't even help it because Santino is what everyone calls me for the rest of the time.

• 15:12Speaker 06

  You know what? We have similar last names where I bet the Santino did the heavy lifting in high school.

• 15:17Andrew Santino?

  All of, literally all, literally all of it.

• 15:19Speaker 06

  It was all, it was all.

• 15:20Andrew Santino?

  But Soder, like if somebody was like, yeah, Dan, I'd be like, Dan.

• 15:24Speaker 06

  My, one of my best friends.

• 15:26Andrew Santino?

  Soder? Oh, Soder. Yeah, that's how, that's how I'd hear it.

• 15:28Speaker 06

  One of my best friends, Zach, his, you know, I'm close with his family.

• 15:31Andrew Santino?

  C K or C H?

• 15:32Speaker 06

  C H.

• 15:34Andrew Santino?

  Okay.

• 15:34Speaker 06

  He's a good dude.

• 15:35Andrew Santino?

  Oh, I know, I'm just saying.

• 15:36Speaker 06

  He's a good man.

• 15:37Andrew Santino?

  I prefer Kay, dude.

• 15:39Speaker 06

  Kay's a wild card. Actually, Zach's a wild card, but he's a tamed wild card now. But I grew up real close to his family and his sister was like, like, a graduation party. It was like, "Your name's Dan?" And I was like, "Yeah." She was like, "I thought it was Soder." And you're like, "You thought my first name was Soder?" She's like, "No, I just didn't like care."

• 15:55Andrew Santino?

  But it is a cool-ass first name, Soder.

• 15:57Speaker 06

  Soder would be a, that's an interesting-

• 15:58Andrew Santino?

  It actually would work 100%.

• 16:00Speaker 06

  Where you go, "Your parents hippies?"

• 16:01Andrew Santino?

  Both of us have last names that could be, in fact, my last name is a first name. When you meet a Santino, it's usually because it's their first name. Yeah, Sonny Corleone is Santino. Santino is a first name. That's why it's really not my last name. My great-grandfather, I'm sure, lied to get away from the mob and was like, "My last name is Santino." And they're like, "No, that's not your last name."

• 16:22Speaker 06

  "What's your real last name?"

• 16:25Andrew Santino?

  At the border, and that's how loose Italians are like, "Gama, what is your, what's your last name?"

• 16:30Speaker 06

  I wonder what, it was Ellis Island, like, that loosey-goosey where they're like, "What do you want to be called?"

• 16:34Andrew Santino?

  Well, no, they didn't ask what your name was.

• 16:36Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 16:36Andrew Santino?

  And you would just say your fucking name.

• 16:38Speaker 06

  Ah, that's crazy. You're on the boat ride practicing your story of what you're gonna say to immigration?

• 16:43Andrew Santino?

  "We come here, we need to be here here."

• 16:45Speaker 06

  He's like, "I definitely didn't murder four men in Dublin. I definitely wasn't the strangler of Killkenny."

• 16:53Andrew Santino?

  Stop saying that, they're gonna, they're gonna know the truth, love.

• 16:55Speaker 06

  "I fucking, what's your name?" You go, "My name is Murphy." He's fucking lying. Dude, I didn't think about that.

• 17:03Andrew Santino?

  Murphy's close to murder. Keep me away from saying murder.

• 17:06Speaker 06

  "That's Murphy!" He said murder. "Why murder him?" He goes, "He said Murphy." Dude, I didn't even think of that.

• 17:12Andrew Santino?

  You can just make up whatever the fuck you want. There was no, if you, it's, they gave you documents. You didn't, if you may have come with documents, but there's plenty of immigrants, for sure, that were like, "This is all I've got, I've came here from, I've come here from Dublin."

• 17:23Speaker 06

  "And this pendant of Saint Anthony." And they're like, "Oh, well, welcome to Brooklyn."

• 17:29Andrew Santino?

  No, you know what they say, they're like, "Go to Chicago." So they shift all the mix.

• 17:34Speaker 06

  I don't know. You good at steel and stuff. Dude, Colin Quinn's New York story, if you haven't watched it on Netflix, he does like how New York became New York by each people coming there. And the fucking, when he does the Irish move in there, but it's just, it's perfect. It's exactly what we're talking about, but he does it in such a funny way. But I never thought about, if I were an illegal immigrant now, how jealous I would have been of Ellis Island.

• 17:55Andrew Santino?

  No, totally dude.

• 17:56Speaker 06

  Just like flooding in.

• 17:58Andrew Santino?

  What, cause they couldn't account for these many, this many people coming in anyway.

• 18:02Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 18:02Andrew Santino?

  And you gotta know, the flex of the rules. I mean, like, think about even in the, dude, even in the forties, forties, thirties, my grandfather, he would fucking, uh, Comiskey Park where the White Sox play.

• 18:14Speaker 06

  Sure.

• 18:15Andrew Santino?

  Or used to play, now it's a new stadium. He fucking snuck in where they like loaded up dirt.

• 18:20Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 18:21Andrew Santino?

  And he snuck in and then got a job there. He was just around and they were like, what are you doing, kid?

• 18:26Speaker 06

  Ah, well, you wanna be here.

• 18:27Andrew Santino?

  Well, you ought to pick up a shovel and get to work, son. Like honestly, he just got it.

• 18:31Speaker 06

  And now I own the White Sox.

• 18:33Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, that's my, my grandfather owns the White Sox, dude.

• 18:35Speaker 06

  But there were like two generations where that shit was absolutely how it went.

• 18:39Andrew Santino?

  Hundred percent.

• 18:40Speaker 06

  And then for like three generations now, we've been like, but that's us too, right? And they're like, no.

• 18:45Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 18:47Speaker 06

  Absolutely not. And you're like, oh fuck, come on.

• 18:51Andrew Santino?

  I did just realize that bit we just talked about of the names that are just like gone extinct.

• 18:55Speaker 06

  And that was.

• 18:55Andrew Santino?

  Our grandfathers were the same way.

• 18:56Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah. No one wants to be a Stanley anymore.

• 18:59Andrew Santino?

  There's no Clarissis anymore.

• 19:01Speaker 06

  Those are just good dog names now.

• 19:03Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, that's so good. Your great, your great grandf, your great grandparents' names are your dog. Like, what is your?

• 19:09Speaker 06

  My dog's name's Myrtle, which is like an old lady name.

• 19:11Andrew Santino?

  Dude, what was your great grand, or what was your, yeah, what was your grandmother's name?

• 19:14Speaker 06

  Mary Lou.

• 19:15Andrew Santino?

  Mary Lou is pretty rad.

• 19:16Speaker 06

  That's a good dog name.

• 19:17Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, that's a really good, Mary Lou is so good.

• 19:19Speaker 06

  A lab named Stanley?

• 19:21Andrew Santino?

  Oh.

• 19:21Speaker 06

  What are you not?

• 19:22Andrew Santino?

  Chocolate, chocolate lab?

• 19:23Speaker 06

  Yellow.

• 19:24Andrew Santino?

  Okay, regular. You're going old school.

• 19:25Speaker 06

  What's your grandpa's name?

• 19:27Andrew Santino?

  My, my grand, my, my dad's side was Dominic.

• 19:32Speaker 06

  Great name for like a, like a boxer or a, or like a.

• 19:35Andrew Santino?

  Well, Dommy's great, Dommy.

• 19:36Speaker 06

  Yeah, if you got like a, uh.

• 19:38Andrew Santino?

  Little Dommy.

• 19:38Speaker 06

  Honestly, I'm giving that to like a rottweiler.

• 19:41Andrew Santino?

  A Dominic is a rot. I get that. Dom. Well, it has to be, it's gotta be, it's gotta be a big boy.

• 19:46Speaker 06

  Big balls, gotta keep the balls.

• 19:47Andrew Santino?

  It's gotta be a big balls dog and you can't touch him.

• 19:48Speaker 06

  No.

• 19:49Andrew Santino?

  Leave those balls on the dog.

• 19:50Speaker 06

  You leave them on until he's an old man.

• 19:51Andrew Santino?

  And then my, uh, my grandmother's name on that side, uh, her name was Bernice.

• 19:59Andrew Santino?

  Bernice.

• 20:00Speaker 06

  I mean, dogs at the park have met named Bernice. Friday nickel. For every time I met a dog. But that's gonna be us, too. That's who we're gonna feel super disrespected is when we're like our futuristic wheelchairs and they're like, someone's walking a dog and you're like, Daniel, Daniel. And you're like, fuck you, man.

• 20:18Andrew Santino?

  What's your dog's name, bitch?

• 20:20Speaker 06

  Andrew, get over here now. Andrew, no. And you're like, fuck, fuck, wolves. Yeah, dude.

• 20:28Andrew Santino?

  That is, that is the line. We will know.

• 20:29Speaker 06

  Comes for everybody.

• 20:30Speaker 01

  In here, we pour whiskey.

• 20:33Andrew Santino?

  This episode of Whiskey Ginger is brought to you by BetterHelp. I've talked pretty heavily on this show about BetterHelp because we all need a little bit of help. It's really nice to talk to somebody. It's nice to get stuff off your chest, get your feelings out there. Therapy can be a source of support for any and all areas of your life. It gets tough. It's a little tough out there. But you think about people that you respect, that you admire. They probably are someone who doesn't mind asking a question, asking for help, and looking for others to aid them as they get through this wild thing that is called life. Okay? We kind of glorify hyper-independence and I don't think that's good anymore.

• 21:17Andrew Santino?

  You need a community, you need friends and family and people to talk to. Support. Support is what's needed to, to really help you grow and move forward. BetterHelp is fully online, making therapy affordable and convenient, serving over 5 million people worldwide. Access a diverse network of more than 30,000 credentialed therapists with a wide range of specialties. You can easily switch therapists at any time with no extra cost. And I'm telling you, if you're looking to build a support system, you gotta build your support system with BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/whiskey today to get 10% off your first month. That's better help, better H E L P dot com slash whiskey. Talk to someone. I'm telling you, it makes me feel so much better.

• 21:58Andrew Santino?

  It will make you feel better to speak to someone from the comfort of your own home, office, car, wherever. Privacy is key and you deserve to feel a little free.

• 22:11Andrew Santino?

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• 22:52Andrew Santino?

  Bourbon Leather, my favorite. Clever Woods, and sometimes Clover Woods, I apologize. Sometimes Clever Woods. And sometimes I'll put on that Mount Fuji when I'm missing Bobby a lot, when I haven't seen him in a couple of weeks. It's clinically proven to control odor better than a shower with just soap alone. It's amazing. It smells so good. It's America's number-one whole-body deodorant formula right now. You gotta try it. You can find them in Walmart, Target, and other retailers across this beautiful, great country. And for the best deals, you can go to shopmando.com. You want to smell good, huh? Put it all over your body, not just under here, and then a spritz here, and then a thing there. Put it everywhere. Put it on your feet. You got stinky feet, put it on your feet. Mando Starter Pack is perfect for new customers. It comes with a solid stick deodorant, cream tube deodorant, and two free products of your choice, like mini body

• 23:35Andrew Santino?

  wash and deodorant wipes. And free shipping as a special offer for our listeners. New customers get $5 off a starter pack with our exclusive code. That equates to over 40% off your starter pack using code WHISKY at shopmando.com. That's shopmando, S-H-O-P-M-A-N-D-O.com. Please support our show. Tell them that we sent you. Smell fresher, stay drier, and boost your confidence from head to toe with Mando.

• 23:56Speaker 02

  Ginger. I like zingers.

• 24:00Speaker 00

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• 24:35Andrew Santino?

  This morning, my shoulder hurt in the morning and I thought, that's bullshit. I'm old. It's my shoulder fucking hurts? Dude, I can't remember one time-

• 24:41Speaker 06

  I can't believe you just said that, cuz I just went through this. Last week, my left shoulder, we're the same age.

• 24:47Andrew Santino?

  Right here.

• 24:48Speaker 06

  Well, I broke my shoulder playing high school football.

• 24:51Andrew Santino?

  Oh shit, okay, definitely. I've never broken that.

• 24:53Speaker 06

  But now, it like hurts.

• 24:55Andrew Santino?

  Oh, this hurts?

• 24:55Speaker 06

  But also, it's not cool when you sucked at football and it's an old injury. It's only cool when you're like, state playoffs, 236 yards all purpose. Then this thing gives out, but I'm not letting Central win.

• 25:09Andrew Santino?

  Instead-

• 25:09Speaker 06

  Instead, it's like, I was a B-team freshman football and my arm snapped like an old chicken bone.

• 25:14Andrew Santino?

  They're like, Dan, you're bad and, and you're fragile. You have to sit out.

• 25:19Speaker 06

  You suck and you're hurt. How are you both? And you go, I would love to get addicted to Percocets right now.

• 25:26Andrew Santino?

  Oh dude, I gave up sports in my senior year of high school because of drugs. I joked about it, like onstage one time, but I literally meant it, that I was like, no, I literally found drugs and I was like, see you later, basketball.

• 25:38Speaker 06

  Do you know how fun my freshman year was? I mean, like, personally, pretty tough year for me.

• 25:43Andrew Santino?

  Freshman year of college?

• 25:44Speaker 06

  Of high school.

• 25:44Andrew Santino?

  Oh.

• 25:45Speaker 06

  Break my shoulder. I suck at football. Well, first I like lose my eighth grade girlfriend. That's heartbreaking.

• 25:52Andrew Santino?

  To who? To another guy?

• 25:53Speaker 06

  Dude, got cheated on.

• 25:54Andrew Santino?

  Oh, who did she leave you for? What's his name, dude?

• 25:56Speaker 06

  Two guys.

• 25:56Andrew Santino?

  Call him out, dude. Two guys? Holy shit.

• 25:59Speaker 06

  She, she ran around.

• 26:02Andrew Santino?

  She was a runaround zoo that, that's the songs about her?

• 26:04Speaker 06

  It was absolute. If I would've heard that at, at that summer, I would've been like, yes.

• 26:10Speaker 06

  Like little me listening to runaround zoo being like, fucking bitch.

• 26:15Speaker 06

  But she was like two guys that were better at football than me.

• 26:18Andrew Santino?

  Older too?

• 26:19Speaker 06

  No, my age.

• 26:20Andrew Santino?

  Whoa, that hurts. Older's always like, yeah, I get it.

• 26:22Speaker 06

  One of them ended up becoming like a legit American hero.

• 26:25Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 26:26Speaker 06

  And he like texts me, he's like very nice.

• 26:28Andrew Santino?

  Oh, this guy's the man.

• 26:29Speaker 06

  Yeah, I'm still-

• 26:30Andrew Santino?

  Imagine being 40 now, in 40, in our 40s and he's like-

• 26:32Speaker 06

  He's still mad about it?

• 26:33Andrew Santino?

  Remember dude, fucked your girl dude.

• 26:36Andrew Santino?

  Fuck your girl, fighting for the states.

• 26:38Speaker 06

  I was cheering for the Taliban.

• 26:41Speaker 06

  He was, uh, he, he's like, he's like an awesome guy. The other guy, I don't know, he disappeared. But like dude, that summer I was like, you get cheated on, you stink at football, break your shoulder. Dad dies. That's tough.

• 26:54Andrew Santino?

  That was eighth grade your dad died?

• 26:56Speaker 06

  Freshman year of high school.

• 26:56Andrew Santino?

  Oh, that's a sorry, yeah.

• 26:57Speaker 06

  In that winter, this is all like a run, dude.

• 26:59Andrew Santino?

  Jesus Christ, dude.

• 27:00Speaker 06

  Ninety seven is a tough year, but Percocets.

• 27:02Andrew Santino?

  Percocets, dude.

• 27:04Speaker 06

  Dude, what? Break my shoulder, get Percocets, ripping Camel Lights and munching Percocets? It was the coolest year of my life.

• 27:12Andrew Santino?

  Does it get cooler than that?

• 27:14Speaker 06

  Shout out Ryan Hoffman, dude. I was at his house on his back porch, just chomping fucking Percocets.

• 27:19Andrew Santino?

  Love that.

• 27:19Speaker 06

  Smoking Camel Lights.

• 27:20Andrew Santino?

  The Hoff Dog.

• 27:21Speaker 06

  We weren't that close, but man, after school, like he lived right by, he was going to his back porch and fucking smoked Benson and Hedges or Camels.

• 27:28Andrew Santino?

  Oof.

• 27:28Speaker 06

  It was great.

• 27:29Andrew Santino?

  I love those guys that I wasn't that close, close with in high school, but we did a lot of drugs together. So we just like bonded over the, those moments.

• 27:34Speaker 06

  Hey, but you fucked up.

• 27:35Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, we didn't really know, like, there's a couple of guys I'm thinking of that. We don't really know each other, but we just go to their crib and I was like, this is a good, he's a really good guy. We, I will tell you, we used to sometimes, the few mistakes I made, my buddy Tommy Ladd, who no longer with us, rest in peace, he was the fucking man. Tom Ladd was the fucking, he was the greatest and the greatest instigator. Nobody was better at being like, you wanna rip a bong before school? And you're like, dude, I can't, I can't, we can't, dude, we gotta go, dude, come on. And he's like, come on.

• 28:03Speaker 06

  My, my bong at home was called the Attitude Adjustment. Cause it was a, uh, it was a Fat Tuesdays drink.

• 28:09Andrew Santino?

  Oh, and you made a bong out of it?

• 28:11Speaker 06

  I went to, I went to like Cancun in high school for spring break with Zach and his family.

• 28:15Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 28:15Speaker 06

  His older brother and sister. And I got an Attitude and then me and my friend Joel made it into a bong and it ripped.

• 28:22Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah. It was a perfect shape.

• 28:24Speaker 06

  Yeah. And we put it in like, we, we put in the female and the male piece perfectly with a rubber stopper.

• 28:30Andrew Santino?

  Oh.

• 28:30Speaker 06

  And you would just.

• 28:31Andrew Santino?

  Engineers.

• 28:32Speaker 06

  So, you know, people would be like, you wanna do an Attitude before school?

• 28:35Andrew Santino?

  Oh, bro.

• 28:36Speaker 06

  All right. One time, I've told this story before and I, I don't know, I told this story, but it's true. I got so high, I was going to my second period English class, which was in one of the mobiles. Outside.

• 28:46Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 28:47Speaker 06

  And it's winter in Colorado and you have to walk up like the wheelchair ramp.

• 28:50Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 28:51Speaker 06

  And it's like clunk clunk in my snow boots and I was so high, I got to the front and I grabbed the handle and I was like, I'm too high. And my friends that were in class were like, we watched you walk up and walk right back down and be like, I'm gonna go smoke a cigarette in my car.

• 29:04Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 29:04Speaker 06

  And I just like sat in my car and listened to tunes like high as fuck.

• 29:07Andrew Santino?

  One of the best days I ever had, uh, getting high with my buddy John with Tish. We, we got fucking ripped and it was one of those days where he was like, dude, this is like really good shit that he had gotten from, you know, this is like really good. I'm like, we always get good shit, man. Like you're, what are you talking about? Like hyping it up in a way. I was like, shut up. Who cares? It's just weed. And I remember fucking walking back to class, to school and being like, whoa, John. I don't know if I'm gonna be able to make it the rest of the day. I was so fucking high.

• 29:36Speaker 06

  You might've just killed me.

• 29:37Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, I'm dead, dude. Did I die? I died in your mom's accord. Fuck, man.

• 29:42Speaker 06

  That kind of, I mean, I feel almost bad for kids smoking weed now because it's all so powerful.

• 29:48Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it's too much.

• 29:48Speaker 06

  And sometimes you get snuck up on back in the day when you like, when Kime Bud started coming out. But dude, my mom dated this guy named Randy.

• 29:56Andrew Santino?

  I love Randy, dude.

• 29:57Speaker 06

  We used to call him clown hair because he had like a cul-de-sac and it was curly around. So I'd call him clown hair when he wasn't around. But dude, he smoked gas.

• 30:06Andrew Santino?

  Oh, Randy was the man.

• 30:07Speaker 06

  And they, yeah, shout out Randy. He gave me a queen size bed, his guest bed.

• 30:11Andrew Santino?

  Thanks, dog.

• 30:12Speaker 06

  I hope you don't, I hope you didn't play on my mom on it. But he.

• 30:15Andrew Santino?

  How do you think I broke it in?

• 30:16Speaker 06

  He's like, that's why I gave it to you. It's a sick fetish.

• 30:20Speaker 06

  But he was like, they went to Hawaii, right?

• 30:22Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 30:22Speaker 06

  And my, and I was like, you should give me some of Randy's weed. And my mom was like, I'm not giving you Randy's weed. You're a fucking high school kid. And I was like, let me get some of Randy's weed. And I did something where my mom was like, I'm gonna give, Randy's gonna give you a nug. And like, so I took cellophane for my cigarettes.

• 30:36Andrew Santino?

  Awesome.

• 30:37Speaker 06

  Put a little nug in there and I remember the date. Arizona was playing Duke in the national championship.

• 30:44Andrew Santino?

  Oh.

• 30:45Speaker 06

  Of March Madness 2001.

• 30:47Andrew Santino?

  I was just gonna say, this is like freshman year, right?

• 30:49Speaker 06

  Yeah, 01, it was like Shane Battier and Elton Brand, maybe?

• 30:52Andrew Santino?

  Elton Brand sounds exactly right.

• 30:53Speaker 06

  Versus like Gilbert Arenas, Fox, they had Jason Gardner, they're fucking stacked, Arizona.

• 31:01Andrew Santino?

  That team was stacked.

• 31:02Speaker 06

  Lauren Woods, it was fucking awesome.

• 31:04Andrew Santino?

  I always forgot about Gilbert Arenas, dude.

• 31:05Speaker 06

  Gilbert Arenas is the man. His podcast is hilarious, too.

• 31:07Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, he's the man.

• 31:08Speaker 06

  Gilbert Arenas is the fucking, Agent Zero is the fucking man.

• 31:10Andrew Santino?

  You gotta get one of those jerseys.

• 31:11Speaker 06

  I'd absolutely get Arizona Gilbert Arenas, all day.

• 31:13Andrew Santino?

  That's dope.

• 31:14Speaker 06

  And I'm only like a year younger, or like two years younger.

• 31:16Andrew Santino?

  They're the same age as that guy.

• 31:17Speaker 06

  That guy fucking rules. But it was the national championship and we were watching at my friend's house because one of my friends was going to Duke and I was like, dude, I'll fucking come over, watch the national championship. I took an attitude of Randy of clown hairs, fucking, just sticky, icky. Dude, it fucked me up. I started driving and I like lived on a suburban street or whatever and it was going like this.

• 31:40Andrew Santino?

  Oh dude, oh I hate that.

• 31:42Speaker 06

  I pulled over, walked back to my house because no one had cell phones back and I called my friend, I was like, at my friend's house, I was like, you gotta come get me. I'm fucking ripped. Dude, my car was just at the end of the street.

• 31:54Andrew Santino?

  Later, car.

• 31:55Speaker 06

  I was like, bye. Locked it, I was like, alright, I gotta go.

• 31:58Andrew Santino?

  But at least you had the wherewithal to like, do that, like, to get away from that is great. Instead of driving like a fucking, an idiot, because I had a couple of moments where we had to pause. Me and my boy Tyler, he was like, we were, that was my guy that we got in trouble with drugs wise. And there was a few moments where I, I was like, thank God we bailed. Because who the fuck, dude, like we took mushrooms one time, we were driving over to our friend Mike's house and, and thank fucking God, like they weren't kicking in the whole time. Because when we got there, they started, like, when I'm turning into his neighborhood, it's kicking in.

• 32:31Speaker 06

  And all of a sudden it just is like.

• 32:33Andrew Santino?

  Holy shit.

• 32:33Speaker 06

  Doing mushrooms back then, you're just like, regular, regular.

• 32:36Andrew Santino?

  Oh my god. But also, back then, different now. When I take mushrooms now, I'm much more like tempered about it. Like I'm doing them on Saturday.

• 32:44Speaker 06

  I'm due, I'm due. I'm like five years due.

• 32:46Andrew Santino?

  But I take little bits and I like to.

• 32:47Speaker 06

  Oh, I'm trying to do like two and a half grams.

• 32:49Andrew Santino?

  Oh, so you want to get. Fucking wrecked. See, I like to take a little bit, I like to take a little bit, and then the next day, take a little bit more. And I feel like it's a nice little cascade up. No, you like to get fucking, see, I don't know, I don't want.

• 33:01Speaker 06

  I'm gonna roll like five joints, fucking. Fly me to the moon.

• 33:06Andrew Santino?

  But see, that's your, that's your, what you don't drink anymore. That's me still, when I go out and I'm having a night of like.

• 33:11Speaker 06

  You float back down and you see it, you go, shit ain't as scary as I thought it was.

• 33:15Andrew Santino?

  The earth is cool.

• 33:16Speaker 06

  Scary.

• 33:16Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, the up is way scarier than the down.

• 33:18Speaker 06

  But then once you start going down, you're like, oh shit.

• 33:20Andrew Santino?

  But when you rocket ship really fast, you know, that made me think of.

• 33:25Andrew Santino?

  You know, weed is so strong today, and I know it's an annoying thing to hear, but it really is like absurd.

• 33:29Speaker 06

  That's how I know I'm getting old. I go into dispensaries, I'm like, do you have a nineteen or twenty percent?

• 33:34Andrew Santino?

  But I think we, I think we should start, we should have a store that sells mids to guys in our generation. That's like, dude, just give me some fucking mids.

• 33:40Speaker 06

  I'm an old timer.

• 33:41Andrew Santino?

  The whole joint to myself on a walk.

• 33:43Speaker 06

  Brother, I was popping ste- stems and seeds during the Clinton administration. So let me get some shit that ain't gonna make me.

• 33:49Andrew Santino?

  The old mids.

• 33:50Speaker 06

  I don't wanna go, I don't wanna become bipolar, cause your weed is so fucking strong.

• 33:54Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 33:55Speaker 06

  Where you go, you know, Dan's like.

• 33:57Andrew Santino?

  He's, you know, he, he, wait, he's autistic? He wasn't autistic, yeah, no, he, he became autistic.

• 34:01Speaker 06

  Vaxxed, you go, no, he smoked like.

• 34:03Andrew Santino?

  Smoked too many weed.

• 34:04Speaker 06

  The purple derp.

• 34:05Andrew Santino?

  Did he have purple derp?

• 34:06Speaker 06

  I was like.

• 34:07Andrew Santino?

  He smoked some of that grimace, dude, it really fucked his head up. Couldn't function.

• 34:11Speaker 06

  I mean, dude, mushrooms in high school was like, you thought you were so smart after you did them. You're like, what have I done? Ever heard of a drug called psilocybin? The first time I ever did mushrooms was with my smartest friend, Brian.

• 34:24Andrew Santino?

  So intimidating to be with a smart friend, by the way.

• 34:26Speaker 06

  But he was a smart friend that also did drugs.

• 34:28Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah, I know, that's most of them, yeah. There was a lot of guys that did drugs with.

• 34:31Speaker 06

  Well, their brains are going so fast, they, they find out drugs like.

• 34:34Andrew Santino?

  Slow them down.

• 34:35Speaker 06

  Yeah, and they go, oh.

• 34:35Andrew Santino?

  It's like the Adderall effect for the opposite?

• 34:37Speaker 06

  Yeah, they go like, oh, thank god. They do drugs. But we took mushrooms at my house, and like, I was with him, and he step by step explained what was gonna happen.

• 34:47Andrew Santino?

  Like the cosmos and shit. Oh, you mean of the trip?

• 34:50Speaker 06

  Yeah, he was like, the psilocybin's in your stomach, you eat it, so it like goes into the sides of your stomach. He's like, it's gonna open your pupils up. You're gonna start feel, and I was like, yeah. Started ga-. And it was the same, it was like, uh, like being, you know, when you sky, when you skydive and they put you on the front? It was like that with mushrooms.

• 35:07Andrew Santino?

  Tandem?

• 35:08Speaker 06

  Yeah, tandem with Brian. I was like.

• 35:10Andrew Santino?

  Check it out dude, okay, so you're gonna start the trip super fucking hard right now.

• 35:13Speaker 06

  Arms back!

• 35:15Andrew Santino?

  Don't pull this until I do. I'm gonna pull this.

• 35:18Speaker 06

  Cause the first time you have a bad trip and you're not with someone like that, you're like, oh, okay.

• 35:22Andrew Santino?

  I remember the worst, I remember the, a few really tremendously bad trips that like.

• 35:27Speaker 06

  Did you do it a lot at ASU?

• 35:29Andrew Santino?

  Mushrooms at ASU?

• 35:30Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 35:30Andrew Santino?

  Uh, yeah, I did, I actually would say I did the most mushrooms in high school that I.

• 35:35Speaker 06

  More than ASU?

• 35:36Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah.

• 35:36Speaker 06

  Cause Arizona has the perfect environment for mushrooms.

• 35:41Andrew Santino?

  A hundred percent, yeah. The desert is, the, the desert is, and you know, I have a big crush on the desert at night when it's calm is perfect.

• 35:47Speaker 06

  If you're on mushrooms.

• 35:48Andrew Santino?

  Oh, my god.

• 35:49Speaker 06

  Brother, you're on a different planet.

• 35:50Andrew Santino?

  It's the best.

• 35:51Speaker 06

  Quite literally.

• 35:52Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, no, literally. But my favorite was fucking just cross fading out, just smoking as much weed as I can and having a bunch of, a bunch of beers. And I, that was when I was like, I'm undefeated. I'm the strongest man in the world.

• 36:03Speaker 06

  ASU is wild.

• 36:05Andrew Santino?

  Oh, stupid dude.

• 36:06Speaker 06

  It was, I mean, I went to, I was right down the, right down I-10. And we were very jealous of you.

• 36:11Andrew Santino?

  It was just, it was just, it was a, it was.

• 36:13Speaker 06

  You're also by a big city.

• 36:14Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, because Phoenix, but, but also like Phoenix now was not what it was then. I said that, I was just there and we went out. And I was saying to Zach who opens for me, I was like, brother, this is, nobody went downtown Phoenix back when I was in school. You would never go downtown. Like, it was like, if you did, cops would literally be like, what are you doing? You buying drugs? You know what I mean? Like, get the fuck out of here.

• 36:33Speaker 06

  I mean, dude.

• 36:34Andrew Santino?

  Now it's amazing.

• 36:36Speaker 06

  It's obviously fuck ASU forever.

• 36:37Andrew Santino?

  A hundred percent for you, yeah.

• 36:38Speaker 06

  You guys, I went up there and I was like, god damn it.

• 36:41Andrew Santino?

  It's the best, dude.

• 36:41Speaker 06

  This is incredible. One of my friends from UNLV was down at Tempe and he's like, you should come up here and hang out. And I went and hung out, I was like, yeah, it's pretty sick. This is so fucking cool. It's a Wednesday.

• 36:52Andrew Santino?

  I always say, you know, I know you guys hate us, I get it.

• 36:55Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 36:55Andrew Santino?

  I get it. And I, I understand, we don't hate you guys, you know why?

• 36:58Speaker 06

  I know.

• 36:58Andrew Santino?

  Cause we're not thinking about it.

• 36:59Speaker 06

  I know.

• 36:59Andrew Santino?

  It's so hard to hear, dude. No, I always say.

• 37:02Speaker 06

  You wouldn't get your drugs without us being close to the border.

• 37:04Andrew Santino?

  Fact, dude, they had to go through you guys. You're our, you're our middleman.

• 37:07Speaker 06

  Getting our stepped on shit.

• 37:08Andrew Santino?

  The amount of guys that drove up coke uh from Tucson.

• 37:11Speaker 06

  Oh my god.

• 37:11Andrew Santino?

  Like when someone would be like, is that Marco's cousin? It's like, yeah, it's like, where's he live? He's like, he lives in Tucson. That's how we get coke.

• 37:17Speaker 06

  Dude, Tucson's a tough fucking town.

• 37:19Andrew Santino?

  Oh dude.

• 37:20Speaker 06

  Tough town.

• 37:20Andrew Santino?

  It's a ru- it's a little, little rough around the edges.

• 37:22Speaker 06

  I fucking, I.

• 37:24Andrew Santino?

  Is it still like that now?

• 37:25Speaker 06

  I don't know. I'm going back, I'm going back in the fall to do a show, but I loved, did you start comedy in LA?

• 37:32Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, I mean, I did mics in Phoenix, but again, I've said this, people have heard me say this, but back then, the Tempe Improv.

• 37:39Speaker 06

  Was it?

• 37:40Andrew Santino?

  Was the only club and you definitely couldn't get there. Like I was nineteen, twenty years old and I did shitty mics.

• 37:47Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 37:47Andrew Santino?

  And they, I think if I'm, I'm probably misremembering, but I think they had like one showcase night.

• 37:54Speaker 06

  That's crazy.

• 37:54Andrew Santino?

  But that was also.

• 37:55Speaker 06

  So did Laughs, but Laughs, good thing about Laughs was they had a great open mic. At, for a while it was its own night.

• 38:04Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 38:04Speaker 06

  And then for uh, for a little bit, it was before the Thursday show, so you could stay throughout the professional show.

• 38:11Andrew Santino?

  That's kinda cool.

• 38:11Speaker 06

  So if you were going later in the open mic, it was straight up just like a set. You're just like, oh, there's a crowd here.

• 38:16Andrew Santino?

  That's rad.

• 38:17Speaker 06

  They're, they're here for comedy.

• 38:18Andrew Santino?

  Is that still there, that club?

• 38:19Speaker 06

  Laughs, yeah.

• 38:21Andrew Santino?

  Cause I've only done, I've never played to, we played Tucson two years ago, we did a theater.

• 38:27Speaker 06

  Yeah, you guys probably did the Rialto.

• 38:28Andrew Santino?

  I don't remember. Actually, now you wanna, now I wanna know because I, I was like, is there a club here?

• 38:33Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, Laughs dude, Laughs on Broadway, nice Broadway. They haven't had me back in over twenty years, but you know what I mean?

• 38:39Andrew Santino?

  Tuxen, Tuxen, Tuxen, it's called the Linda Ronstadt Music Hall.

• 38:42Speaker 06

  Oh, that's cool.

• 38:43Andrew Santino?

  I don't know, it's like a twenty-five-hundred seat or something like that.

• 38:45Speaker 06

  That's fucking really cool.

• 38:46Andrew Santino?

  Linda Ronstadt, who's from Tucson. Shout out Linda Ronstadt, dude.

• 38:50Speaker 06

  Dude, it was, I got to work in radio there. That was the coolest part. I got to work for like an alternative radio station when that.

• 38:54Andrew Santino?

  At co- at a college radio station?

• 38:56Speaker 06

  I did college radio, but no, I worked at KFMA in Tucson.

• 38:59Andrew Santino?

  You were built for this.

• 39:00Speaker 06

  It was awesome. It was the coolest job I ever had in my life. Like job, like I love stand-up, it's truly an honor to do stand-up.

• 39:08Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 39:08Speaker 06

  The job that I got hired for at KFMA was the coolest. I feel bad that radio isn't as popular as it is now.

• 39:15Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 39:15Speaker 06

  Cause it was such a. Fucking fun. I met some of the greatest people I ever met in my life. I had to work overnights, which was like 10pm to 3am.

• 39:23Andrew Santino?

  Rad.

• 39:23Speaker 06

  Leave it around 1:30 and program it. Leave it on auto and take off when you're like, fuck it, it's 1:45. I just did the last break. I'm gonna go home. But it was fucking awesome, dude.

• 39:34Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 39:34Speaker 06

  Cause you just, commercial breaks, just go out in the parking lot, get high. The internet was around, but it wasn't as dominant.

• 39:40Andrew Santino?

  Well, you weren't on your phone.

• 39:41Speaker 06

  You weren't on your phone. You would like go in, eh, you know what was big? AOL Instant Messenger.

• 39:46Andrew Santino?

  Love.

• 39:47Speaker 06

  Dude, a couple of girls I had crushes on in college.

• 39:49Andrew Santino?

  ASL dude, ASL.

• 39:50Speaker 06

  You hear that door open and you'd be like, it was like they're in the room with you. You're like, oh, hey. Oh, me? I'm just at work.

• 39:57Andrew Santino?

  Dude, that was the beginning of fantasy. Before you really knew what, who they, what someone looked like and you were talking to them. The fantasy was, was unmatched. Cause you could really like coordinate this person in your mind of being like.

• 40:06Speaker 06

  Right. You did, but then you met them and you're like, oh.

• 40:08Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, but I mean, how fun in the meantime. Now it's like you immediately know what they look like. The moment before people talk online, before people like meet on dating sites and all that bullshit.

• 40:16Speaker 06

  You know what they look like.

• 40:17Andrew Santino?

  You know every, no, you, you know everything.

• 40:18Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 40:19Andrew Santino?

  You know what their fucking bullshit favorite quote is from a movie, like.

• 40:22Speaker 06

  Did you ever do match.com or anything like that?

• 40:24Andrew Santino?

  No, never did that, dude.

• 40:25Speaker 06

  There was a moment, I wanna say like 2017 where I was like, fuck it, dude.

• 40:29Andrew Santino?

  You jumped on Match?

• 40:30Speaker 06

  I, and it's laborious. It's like, you gotta fill out 40 different things.

• 40:35Andrew Santino?

  That's a job.

• 40:36Speaker 06

  And then it just becomes the same bullshit as another app where they're like, money, you know, like conversation like, I don't wanna do this.

• 40:42Andrew Santino?

  What's up? What are you doing?

• 40:43Speaker 06

  I don't wanna, I don't wanna do this.

• 40:44Andrew Santino?

  At least with, at least with AIM, you had this like mysterious.

• 40:50Speaker 06

  But it was also people you knew.

• 40:51Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, no, that, but that's what I mean is like you could, but you can, you kinda get to characterize yourself. But it was the first time I learned about how to ma, how to joke around with girls via text.

• 41:00Speaker 06

  Oh my god, yeah.

• 41:02Andrew Santino?

  Because prior to that, you could always crack jokes in a circle and say something where a girl's like, he's funny.

• 41:07Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 41:07Andrew Santino?

  But like when you learned how to joke via text was like, what a skill. Cause my friends would be like, Sid, do you know, write something funny?

• 41:12Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 41:13Andrew Santino?

  And so I'd be like, I got this dude.

• 41:14Speaker 06

  Ah, dude, or you would fuck with each other and if someone's AOL Instant Messenger was open and you'd just blast. Same Brian, same friend.

• 41:22Andrew Santino?

  I fucked my sister.

• 41:24Speaker 06

  Same friend, same friend that I did mushrooms with.

• 41:27Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 41:27Speaker 06

  When we were in college, same time, AOL, uh, Facebook comes out.

• 41:30Andrew Santino?

  Oh yeah, our freshman year, right? Yeah.

• 41:32Speaker 06

  Yeah, like oh, I think it came out like oh three. So maybe like my.

• 41:36Andrew Santino?

  Oh, no, no, sophomore, sophomore, yeah.

• 41:38Speaker 00

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• 42:14Speaker 06

  So I have a, and I'm like friends with girls that I go to Arizona with. Like, I'm friends with girls that have like crushes on at Arizona.

• 42:20Andrew Santino?

  It's rad.

• 42:20Speaker 06

  My, this motherfucker Brian watches me put my password in.

• 42:25Andrew Santino?

  Oh.

• 42:26Speaker 06

  And that's all. He just watches me put his password, my password in.

• 42:29Andrew Santino?

  What do you, do you remember what it was, by the way?

• 42:31Speaker 06

  No.

• 42:32Andrew Santino?

  Do you remember your AIM name?

• 42:33Speaker 06

  Oh, my AOL's message in your name was not good.

• 42:38Andrew Santino?

  Mine was whack as fuck.

• 42:39Speaker 06

  Ah, dude, I'm, I'm embarrassed. Mine was like squirt42 or something. Like squirt42, 42, 24. It was horrible.

• 42:46Andrew Santino?

  Squirt42?

• 42:48Speaker 06

  24.

• 42:49Andrew Santino?

  Mine was, uh...

• 42:50Speaker 06

  That's, I don't even know what that is. That sounds so perverted.

• 42:53Andrew Santino?

  You know what it is, dude.

• 42:54Speaker 06

  It was diuretic.

• 42:54Andrew Santino?

  You love squirt. You love to drink squirt.

• 42:56Speaker 06

  Fucking squirt for me.

• 42:57Andrew Santino?

  Squirt, dude.

• 42:58Speaker 06

  It sounds so gross. When like back then, what was yours?

• 43:01Andrew Santino?

  Tizno. My buddy Tyler would call me Tiz. Tizno. Santino, Tizno turned into Tiz. And it was, it was Santino420.

• 43:09Speaker 06

  Yeah, dude, damn, you were a bad boy.

• 43:12Andrew Santino?

  Give me a break, dude.

• 43:13Speaker 06

  Get blazed online.

• 43:14Andrew Santino?

  It is so funny. But I remember, I remember like seeing it when I got older and I was like, dude.

• 43:20Speaker 06

  Dude, you asked me that.

• 43:21Andrew Santino?

  What a loser.

• 43:21Speaker 06

  I can't tell you what I feel right now in my core. I feel like, I was like, I don't want, don't tell them your... Cause I remembered it immediately. I was like, oh!

• 43:27Andrew Santino?

  Your squirt is as bad as my 420. The 420 was like, shut up, dork.

• 43:31Speaker 06

  Shut up.

• 43:31Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, but you know what?

• 43:32Speaker 06

  Which crazy is when you...

• 43:33Andrew Santino?

  Loved weed.

• 43:34Speaker 06

  If you loved it.

• 43:35Andrew Santino?

  Loved it so much.

• 43:36Speaker 06

  Live the culture.

• 43:36Andrew Santino?

  Dude, had to. In fact, we had a fuck, I'm embarrassed, I'll say it. We had like a little hip-hop group where we freestyled together. Oh, yeah, dude.

• 43:44Speaker 06

  No, no, no!

• 43:45Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 43:46Speaker 06

  Oh my god, no!

• 43:47Andrew Santino?

  By the way, and at one point, we were called, we were called...

• 43:50Speaker 06

  I don't wanna know.

• 43:51Andrew Santino?

  This is such stoner nonsense. We were called Delta 9.

• 43:56Speaker 06

  Delta nine, for those of you don't know, it's THC is delta nine, isn't it?

• 44:01Andrew Santino?

  Delta hydro tetra cannabinoid, whatever the fuck the THC is.

• 44:05Speaker 06

  Delta nine, oh my god.

• 44:07Andrew Santino?

  But dude, back then, we were like-

• 44:08Speaker 06

  How did you write it?

• 44:09Andrew Santino?

  Delta nine, oh, bro, I fucking, I don't, someone else did the art, but it was like, it was so cornball shit.

• 44:15Speaker 06

  Yeah, dude.

• 44:15Andrew Santino?

  Like, D nine.

• 44:16Speaker 06

  Oh, shit.

• 44:17Andrew Santino?

  Sick, dog.

• 44:18Speaker 06

  Dude, uh-oh.

• 44:18Andrew Santino?

  In John's basement, his mom is like, "Shut the fuck up!"

• 44:21Speaker 06

  Yeah, you're like, "No, no, no, no."

• 44:22Andrew Santino?

  We're rolling, we're separating ounces of weed to sell. And we say, and I used to keep the weed to sell in my, um, detachable, uh, in my detachable-

• 44:32Speaker 06

  Face.

• 44:33Andrew Santino?

  Face for the, for the car stereo, in the case of that. That's where my weed would go. And I'd keep that in my front pocket, cause my jeans were big enough.

• 44:40Speaker 06

  I hope that comes back. I hope, uh-

• 44:42Andrew Santino?

  Detachable face CDs?

• 44:43Speaker 06

  The whole thing that I hope comes back is physical media.

• 44:46Andrew Santino?

  I feel like that's definitely coming back.

• 44:48Speaker 06

  We gotta go back to physical media, so we can actually own the shit that we buy.

• 44:51Andrew Santino?

  True.

• 44:52Speaker 06

  And I think stereos with removable heads, we need those, we need that back.

• 44:56Andrew Santino?

  Dude, when I see a car, when I see a car now, like a drop top here in California, cause you, the sickest thing about LA, to be honest, I love cars, and you see these old, a lot of retro cars that are drop tops, and they still have those in it, and I'm like, "That's so sick." Well, cause you can't upgrade the system, there is, I mean, you could put in a Sirius, but it's like, get fucked.

• 45:15Speaker 06

  No.

• 45:16Andrew Santino?

  No, so they keep the old stereo, the old flat stereo.

• 45:18Speaker 06

  That is fucking awesome.

• 45:19Andrew Santino?

  But I saw a guy in an old-

• 45:20Speaker 06

  Pop that thing off?

• 45:21Andrew Santino?

  Old Volvo, and it was popped off.

• 45:22Speaker 06

  Oh!

• 45:23Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, I was like-

• 45:24Speaker 06

  Just seeing the little connection on the side.

• 45:25Andrew Santino?

  So cool, dude.

• 45:26Speaker 06

  Oh, my god, but that, yeah, bring that back. That was so fun.

• 45:29Andrew Santino?

  What was mine called? Not, what was the brand?

• 45:30Speaker 06

  An Alpine.

• 45:32Andrew Santino?

  AOA, A O Iowa, A W I A, AOA?

• 45:35Speaker 06

  Yeah, I think I had an Alpine.

• 45:36Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you were, yeah, you had, you were fancy, dude.

• 45:38Speaker 06

  My Dodge Stratus, my ninety-six Dodge Stratus.

• 45:42Andrew Santino?

  That was your first car?

• 45:43Speaker 06

  My first car was an eighty-eight Honda Accord hatchback.

• 45:45Andrew Santino?

  Honda Accord, Honda Accord was almost everyone in our generation's first car.

• 45:48Speaker 06

  Yeah, and then we got it at a police auction.

• 45:51Andrew Santino?

  Hell, yeah, dude.

• 45:51Speaker 06

  And then it broke down with him.

• 45:53Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, dude.

• 45:54Speaker 06

  Six months.

• 45:54Andrew Santino?

  It was stolen, the brake lines were cut.

• 45:56Speaker 06

  It dude, the master cylinder broke, the gas went out, I mean, the brakes went out.

• 46:00Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 46:00Speaker 06

  Dude, we, we were going to get tickets to see, um, Blair Witch Project downtown at the Gothic Theater.

• 46:07Andrew Santino?

  Huge night, huge night.

• 46:09Speaker 06

  This is like when people thought the Blair Rich Project was for real. Like, I know, I know, but this movie's like real. Dude, my brakes went out while we were driving and I had to use my handbrake in the, in the hatchback.

• 46:20Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 46:20Speaker 06

  All the way to downtown Denver and back. Just like pulling on it. The fact we didn't get in an accident, we're so lucky.

• 46:26Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, but no, no, no. God was on your side because things were more manual, right? When things were more manual, it was like, it did work out better that way.

• 46:35Speaker 06

  Just like.

• 46:35Andrew Santino?

  In the same way, that worked in the same way that hitting a Nintendo made it work.

• 46:39Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 46:39Andrew Santino?

  It was like manual stuff just worked better because you were like, hey, come on.

• 46:42Speaker 06

  My energy into your energy.

• 46:44Andrew Santino?

  It changed, changed the source.

• 46:47Speaker 06

  Yeah, dude, my mom's TV, I'd fucking slam the side of that thing. My mom got a new TV my freshman year in college. I came home for Thanksgiving, I was like, what the fuck is this? She was like, what? You, I don't spend food money on you anymore?

• 47:01Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you fat asshole. I can now buy my own shit.

• 47:04Speaker 06

  But I used to have to fucking wallop that thing to get it.

• 47:06Andrew Santino?

  The box?

• 47:07Speaker 06

  Just the TV.

• 47:08Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah.

• 47:09Speaker 06

  Have to fucking hit the side of the TV to get it to work.

• 47:11Andrew Santino?

  Get to level out the frame, right?

• 47:13Speaker 06

  Yeah, go like all crazy, then it go like, and you're like, cool, alright. Fucking SD.

• 47:17Andrew Santino?

  We used to, the handbrake, me and my buddy Colin in college, we used to take this girl's car that lived on the, she had a car. Cause no, almost no one had a car freshman year of, at ASU. And she had a Saturn and, uh, and we used to take that fucking thing and Miller would be driving. And out of nowhere, I'd just like, bro, and I would just yank and he'd be like, yeah!

• 47:38Andrew Santino?

  Dude, one time we were driving to the back of, back of ASU in the, in the parking lot. We had just gotten beer and I had smoked a joint on the way home. And, uh, we're pulling into the parking lot at P V Man and I yanked the fucking thing like a dickhead out of nowhere. And he spins out and it goes like into a spot.

• 47:54Speaker 06

  No way.

• 47:55Andrew Santino?

  I swear, well dude, come on, it was about as good as it could have been.

• 47:57Speaker 06

  Yeah, where it does, where it even kind of lands, you go.

• 48:00Andrew Santino?

  And everyone was like, whoa, and he goes, like a glove.

• 48:02Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 48:03Andrew Santino?

  I was like, come on, rip the fucking roof off.

• 48:05Speaker 06

  It is, it is like, I know there's like a lot of people that are like, what does college do or whatever? It's like, it lets you be an asshole.

• 48:11Andrew Santino?

  An asshole.

• 48:11Speaker 06

  In a bubble.

• 48:12Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 48:13Speaker 06

  For four years.

• 48:14Andrew Santino?

  And some people die and you're gonna lose some people.

• 48:16Speaker 06

  You're gonna lose folks. Some people are gonna do harder drugs and you're gonna lose them that way. Some people are just gonna disappear.

• 48:22Andrew Santino?

  And it and that's fine.

• 48:23Speaker 06

  Guys from your like freshman dorm, you're like, what happened to Adam?

• 48:26Andrew Santino?

  What happened to that fucking dude?

• 48:27Speaker 06

  Did Adam just disappear? After a semester?

• 48:30Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, he got arrested. He's on the run. He's been on the run for quite a while.

• 48:33Speaker 06

  Yeah, dude, it's crazy because we're both from cold cities and then went to Arizona and I missed the cold. And I think that's why I like living in New York.

• 48:40Andrew Santino?

  I didn't miss it. I the only thing I missed was family. I missed culture of Chicago and family.

• 48:46Speaker 06

  I missed seasons.

• 48:47Andrew Santino?

  Outside of that, no, I didn't fucking give a shit.

• 48:49Speaker 06

  Oh dude, I missed.

• 48:50Andrew Santino?

  I just missed my family and the people of Chicago, the way Chicago is.

• 48:55Speaker 06

  The people of Chicago.

• 48:56Andrew Santino?

  Something about it, dude.

• 48:57Speaker 06

  You're running for mayor on that shit.

• 48:58Andrew Santino?

  I miss the people of Chicago.

• 48:59Speaker 06

  And I'll tell you what I miss the most. It's not, oh, I could say the hot dogs, I could say the baseball, I could say the football. It's the people of Chicago.

• 49:06Andrew Santino?

  Well, cause here's why. New York is too many different kinds of people.

• 49:11Speaker 06

  Well, different kinds of people.

• 49:12Andrew Santino?

  And I love it so much. You know that. That is why I'm obsessed with New York. I have this crush on New York. But Chicago, the people of Chicago are Chicagoans.

• 49:20Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 49:21Andrew Santino?

  Like when somebody says, New York people, you're like, mm, there's so many different kinds of people.

• 49:26Speaker 06

  Oh my God, you could break it up into, that's where you get boroughs, you get neighborhoods.

• 49:29Andrew Santino?

  But Chicago, when you're a Chicagoan, you meet people, you go, this guy's undeniably a Chicagoan. Like there's people I meet when I go home and you're like, this fucking guy, there's something about it that that.

• 49:39Speaker 06

  Boston has that.

• 49:40Andrew Santino?

  Boston has it very much.

• 49:41Speaker 06

  Philly has that.

• 49:42Andrew Santino?

  Philly has it a little bit. I feel like Boston has it bad.

• 49:45Speaker 06

  I'd say, uh, I'd say as an area, the Bay area used to have that a lot, like people from the Bay area.

• 49:50Andrew Santino?

  What is it now though?

• 49:51Speaker 06

  It's all tech shit.

• 49:52Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, so these guys aren't even the, it's not even the place anymore.

• 49:55Speaker 06

  They fucked it up, dude.

• 49:56Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it's weird to think that that.

• 49:57Speaker 06

  Denver is not, I don't feel unity at all. I don't feel anybody like, are you from Colorado? Great. It's fun to talk about Colorado, but I don't think we have like.

• 50:07Andrew Santino?

  Too many people from other places.

• 50:08Speaker 06

  Tell you the problem with people that are new in Denver right now is they play this game with you and they find out you left of I love Denver more than you. And so you go like, don't do this with me. And they go. Honestly, I just couldn't see living anywhere else. And you go, alright, well.

• 50:24Andrew Santino?

  Get fucked.

• 50:24Speaker 06

  I grew up here. It was nice.

• 50:25Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 50:26Speaker 06

  I'd like to come back here.

• 50:27Andrew Santino?

  With, with, with Chicago, it's more like, yeah, in LA, all those fucking weirdo queers out there. That's what, that's what it's like. They, they mock you.

• 50:35Speaker 06

  My brother and sister-in-law live in Chicago. It fucking rules.

• 50:37Andrew Santino?

  It does rule.

• 50:38Speaker 06

  We love visiting there.

• 50:39Andrew Santino?

  But I don't wanna, I can't, I don't know if I could live there. There's only one way I could live there. In the John Hancock building, in the apartment that Farley died in. If that's available, I would buy it.

• 50:48Speaker 06

  Is that where he died?

• 50:49Andrew Santino?

  The Hancock building, yeah.

• 50:50Speaker 06

  Really?

• 50:51Andrew Santino?

  Yeah. There was apartments in there. Yeah, he lived there.

• 50:54Speaker 06

  That's wild.

• 50:55Andrew Santino?

  I know.

• 50:55Speaker 06

  Would you try to contact his ghost?

• 50:57Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, dude, ever. No, but I would. That is one of those, like, I'd, like, we know a guy.

• 51:01Speaker 06

  What if you, uh, hypothetically, what if you got it, right?

• 51:04Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 51:05Speaker 06

  Crazy haunted by like an upset Chris Farley.

• 51:09Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 51:09Speaker 06

  Cause he knows what he lost.

• 51:10Andrew Santino?

  A hundred percent.

• 51:11Speaker 06

  He's like, gosh, I did one fucking extra line. And it's like, you're just there watching TV and he's like, gah, just sends a vase across the room.

• 51:19Andrew Santino?

  He's like, David. I'm about to break stuff.

• 51:25Speaker 06

  And he's like, gah, it's just like your couch gets ripped in half.

• 51:28Andrew Santino?

  It'd be so sick.

• 51:29Speaker 06

  You would be cool with that?

• 51:30Andrew Santino?

  A hundred percent.

• 51:30Speaker 06

  After how long would you get sick of it? Because.

• 51:33Andrew Santino?

  It'd be so fun.

• 51:35Speaker 06

  My mom worked at the hotel that the Shining is based off of.

• 51:39Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah.

• 51:40Speaker 06

  And she said the people that worked there, it's a haunted hotel and people, you get like sick of it after a while.

• 51:45Andrew Santino?

  Cause you hear a lot of stuff.

• 51:46Speaker 06

  Where you're like, okay.

• 51:47Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, go away.

• 51:48Speaker 06

  It's like they knock a door open and you go, alright. It's like a bad roommate at that point. And I think like, how long until you're sick of Farley's ghost?

• 51:56Andrew Santino?

  I don't know. I think I just, I think the nostalgia for me is so wild that I.

• 52:00Speaker 06

  That spirit was Chris Farley.

• 52:01Andrew Santino?

  Every time I sit, every time I'm downtown and I see it, I'm always like, so wild to think he, he, in one of those apartments, for some reason, it's like whimsical. It's awful.

• 52:10Speaker 06

  I get that.

• 52:11Andrew Santino?

  It's awful.

• 52:11Speaker 06

  No, because.

• 52:12Andrew Santino?

  It's awful, but it's amazing.

• 52:13Speaker 01

  In here, we pour whiskey.

• 52:16Andrew Santino?

  You know that, uh, big wallet that your, uh, your dad used to have, that big, heavy thing that definitely caused sciatica and a lump on his right or left side? Those old days of crappy wallets are out of here. Now with Ridge Wallet, Ridge Wallet has over 50 colors and styles to choose from. Phenomenal, okay? They sent me a bunch of them. I have a few of them at the office. They're amazing. I don't have one in my pocket right now. I'm sorry because I'm sitting here talking to you. But losing your wallet is the worst. But Ridge is great because they have the AirTag. I know you guys know about AirTags. I AirTag everything. My golf clubs when I travel, my suitcases, my backpacks. I have them all over the place because we travel so much. I leave stuff. You're always going to know where your wallet is before that panic mode sets in.

• 52:56Andrew Santino?

  Ridge Wallet is having, uh, they're having an anniversary sale and I'm telling you, these guys have made wallets cool, sleek, slim, convenient, durable, which I really love. I love these things are so tough. And they got over 100,000 five-star reviews. They're unique. They're very slim. You can fit, I think, up to 12 cards in there and a little bit of cash. If you still carry cash, which I do, I do love it though. It is, it's beautiful and unique and different. It's not like those big old crusty leather wallets that you see. Not a big fan. And Ridge Wallet is changing the game, okay? You gotta try it. If you're in the market for a new wallet, you gotta try Ridge Wallet. Right now Ridge is having their once a year anniversary sale. Get up to 40% off at ridge.com/whiskeyginger.

• 53:41Andrew Santino?

  Just head to ridge.com, R-I-D-G-E.com/whiskeyginger to see their biggest sale of the year. After you purchase, they're going to ask you where you heard about them. Please support the show and tell them that we sent you. This episode of Whiskey Ginger is brought to you by Nord VPN. Nord is easy to use. You can connect with one click or enable auto-connect for zero-click protection. If you don't know what a VPN is, what are you doing? I travel a lot, all the time. I want to watch stuff when I'm running around the United States and/or the globe. And the Nord VPN helps me watch what I want to watch, wherever I want, whenever I want. Amazing speed with Nord VPN. It's one of the fastest VPNs out there. So there's no buffering, no lagging while streaming and stops your ISP bandwidth. Throttling, okay?

• 54:25Andrew Santino?

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• 55:10Andrew Santino?

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• 55:20Speaker 02

  Ginger. I like gingers.

• 55:25Speaker 00

  Let's be honest, you don't go to the family holiday gift exchange just to participate. You go to win. This year, get a gift that'll cause a stir. A KitchenAid Stand Mixer. It's not just an appliance, it's a present to help them with the making. Year after year, recipe after recipe, you're enabling the family to whip up new traditions. 'Tis your season to mix it up. Gift a KitchenAid Stand Mixer this year and make more than meals.

• 55:51Speaker 06

  There's something about knowing history took place somewhere.

• 55:56Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 55:57Speaker 06

  Where you're like, New York's crazy because New York's like 700 years old or whatever. And I'm from Colorado where like, my neighborhood was like from the 70s. They're like, we started developing this field in like the 60s and now people live here and you're like.

• 56:13Andrew Santino?

  Right on, man.

• 56:14Speaker 06

  I grew up, this is the sacred land where I grew up.

• 56:16Andrew Santino?

  Almost nobody died there yet.

• 56:18Speaker 06

  No, probably not. Not a lot, but like New York is like, it's like a DMV line of ghosts.

• 56:24Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it's awesome.

• 56:25Speaker 06

  They're like, I've been here since fucking 1750. And there's like crazy moments where I'll catch myself being like, that's fucking like old.

• 56:33Andrew Santino?

  I love that.

• 56:34Speaker 06

  Like McSorley's, that bar you can go to. It's like one of the oldest bars in the world.

• 56:38Andrew Santino?

  In the world.

• 56:39Speaker 06

  Yeah, and you go and you're like, that's fucking crazy that it's just.

• 56:42Andrew Santino?

  Well, that's what that's, I mean, we talk like this, we're Americans, that's Europeans are like.

• 56:45Speaker 06

  Yeah, I know, they got like.

• 56:47Andrew Santino?

  And the Chinese are like, get in.

• 56:50Speaker 06

  We check it by the thousands, you fucking morons.

• 56:54Andrew Santino?

  But that is the, that is the, uh. That I do have weird nostalgia for a lot of stuff like that. Like one day I always thought if, if I could afford it, I would. Uh, buy a place in one of the buildings I grew up in as a kid, like that would be rad.

• 57:08Speaker 06

  That's sick.

• 57:08Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, cuz we bounced around to a bunch of different high rises. I always thought that would be cool, but I was also like, do I even want that?

• 57:15Speaker 06

  Yeah, but then you're like, you don't, you're not thinking of it like an adult, or you're like.

• 57:18Andrew Santino?

  I know.

• 57:19Speaker 06

  Where am I working at?

• 57:20Andrew Santino?

  Is it convenient?

• 57:21Speaker 06

  Yeah, how, how long does it take me to get to it? You gotta fly out of O'Hare.

• 57:24Andrew Santino?

  I know.

• 57:25Speaker 06

  Every day, weekly, that's a nightmare drive.

• 57:28Andrew Santino?

  Not as bad as fucking LAX. We, we know a dude, uh, there is a guy that we know. Uh, uh, well, I mean, we, you know of him is what I mean. I don't know if you know, if you know him. But he bought the Friday the thirteenth house here in Los Angeles.

• 57:43Speaker 06

  The Friday the thirteenth, which, which Friday the thirteenth?

• 57:49Speaker 06

  But they're at a camp.

• 57:50Andrew Santino?

  No, no, no, no, no, no.

• 57:51Speaker 06

  You mean Halloween?

• 57:53Andrew Santino?

  No, isn't Friday the thirteenth?

• 57:54Speaker 06

  It's at Camp Crystal Lake, dog.

• 57:55Andrew Santino?

  Freddy.

• 57:56Speaker 06

  Nightmare on Elm Street.

• 57:57Andrew Santino?

  Nightmare on Elm Street, sorry dude.

• 57:58Speaker 06

  That's sick.

• 57:59Andrew Santino?

  My brain just farted.

• 58:00Speaker 06

  He bought the Nightmare on Elm Street?

• 58:01Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 58:02Speaker 06

  That's awesome.

• 58:03Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, and it's.

• 58:03Speaker 06

  That's fucking awesome.

• 58:04Andrew Santino?

  Every time I drive by it, I'm like, what a cool purchase, dude.

• 58:07Speaker 06

  Oh, man, prank phone calling him is Freddy Krueger. I'll see you in your dreams tonight.

• 58:12Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, this is it.

• 58:13Speaker 06

  I can't wait to see you. Oh, my God.

• 58:15Andrew Santino?

  And it's in my old neighborhood. I used to pass it all the time.

• 58:18Speaker 06

  It's on Elm Street?

• 58:19Andrew Santino?

  Fourteen twenty-eight Elm Street.

• 58:20Speaker 06

  It's so funny, you gotta edit that out.

• 58:23Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah, yeah, cut that out.

• 58:24Speaker 06

  But you go boop, and his lips.

• 58:27Andrew Santino?

  Cut that out, dude.

• 58:28Speaker 06

  Freddy Claus, bah. Yeah, you can't, um, I couldn't live on Elm Street. I'm a pussy. I would.

• 58:36Andrew Santino?

  It's not on Elm, by the way.

• 58:37Speaker 06

  I would be scared of it.

• 58:39Andrew Santino?

  Hold on one second, let me. Yeah, that's right, it's not on Elm. Okay, good, we're good. I was like, please don't fuck and, uh.

• 58:46Speaker 06

  He goes, hey, Santino, I got a bunch of people coming outside my house.

• 58:49Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 58:49Speaker 06

  Um, I couldn't.

• 58:52Speaker 06

  It would scare me too.

• 58:53Andrew Santino?

  No, I would love it.

• 58:54Speaker 06

  When I find out a place is haunted, it fucks me up.

• 58:56Andrew Santino?

  It would only fuck you up if you like read, if you're redecorating and it started to like haunt you for changing it.

• 59:01Speaker 06

  No, that's how big of a pussy I am. Even if I know it's haunted, it fucks me up on some level.

• 59:05Andrew Santino?

  You, you, you calling your wife immediately if something, you hear something?

• 59:07Speaker 06

  Yes. Dude, Yanis got married in this old mansion in New York City, right?

• 59:13Andrew Santino?

  Gross.

• 59:13Speaker 06

  And it was like, you stay there. You know, it's like a, uh, it's like a manor. So it's like huge. And I split a room with like Bargetzi and a couple other people. We all stayed in this big room.

• 59:23Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 59:24Speaker 06

  And my bed was like right where the hallway is. It was a long old hallway and I was, I didn't sleep. I just, I just didn't sleep. Cause I just kept being like, I know I'm gonna look down that hallway and that door's gonna be open. And then my life's different.

• 59:37Andrew Santino?

  And that's so true.

• 59:38Speaker 06

  And then my life is completely different. I'm not gonna not go look. I'm a white guy. I have to go see what it is.

• 59:43Andrew Santino?

  Hello?

• 59:44Speaker 06

  Hello?

• 59:45Andrew Santino?

  That guy.

• 59:45Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 59:46Andrew Santino?

  Hello?

• 59:46Speaker 06

  You guys playing a joke? And then I'm like, oh, pin to the fucking ceiling. So I just didn't sleep.

• 59:53Andrew Santino?

  For the whole time?

• 59:54Speaker 06

  No.

• 59:54Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, see?

• 59:55Speaker 06

  Ah, when daybreak.

• 59:57Andrew Santino?

  When daybreak, you're good.

• 59:58Speaker 06

  I got like maybe one or two hours like.

• 1:00:00Andrew Santino?

  I can, if haunted shit doesn't fuck me up, it's kind of intriguing for some reason.

• 1:00:04Speaker 06

  Why I'm such a pussy about ghosts?

• 1:00:05Andrew Santino?

  It's never gonna do anything, do you, man?

• 1:00:07Speaker 06

  You say that until it doesn't. You say that, you, you talk all this shit about ghosts.

• 1:00:12Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:12Speaker 06

  Until you don't. Until it's Dan disappeared.

• 1:00:16Andrew Santino?

  What happened to Dan?

• 1:00:17Speaker 06

  We found Dan with his neck twisted. All the way around.

• 1:00:21Andrew Santino?

  All the way around, yeah.

• 1:00:22Speaker 06

  Physically impossible. It's a, but now detectives vape. Now they vape.

• 1:00:27Andrew Santino?

  Oh yeah, they vape now.

• 1:00:29Speaker 06

  This looks like it was paranormal.

• 1:00:31Andrew Santino?

  Someone's like, is that grape?

• 1:00:32Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:00:33Andrew Santino?

  Is that?

• 1:00:33Speaker 06

  It actually is kiwi grape.

• 1:00:34Andrew Santino?

  Oh, kiwi grape is so good.

• 1:00:35Speaker 06

  They do that now.

• 1:00:38Speaker 06

  They do that now. I still lost my family. Dude, vaping versus smoking is.

• 1:00:44Andrew Santino?

  Nah, it's a different one. I don't, my buddy was doing it all day today. I was hanging with him. I was like.

• 1:00:48Speaker 06

  It's, just looks med, it looks medical.

• 1:00:51Andrew Santino?

  But it also looks, uh.

• 1:00:52Speaker 06

  Like, you know why we grew up with asthma?

• 1:00:54Andrew Santino?

  Too many of them. You get too much. Vapor's like, you're getting too much.

• 1:00:58Speaker 06

  Do you remember when the kids back, we'd be like, sorry, I can't breathe.

• 1:01:01Andrew Santino?

  Oh yeah.

• 1:01:01Speaker 06

  That's when it's like, space, it's like space asthma.

• 1:01:04Andrew Santino?

  And every guy that did this, every kid that, they all, they all like tapioca pudding.

• 1:01:11Speaker 06

  You heard it here first. You guys were eating fucking come pudding.

• 1:01:15Andrew Santino?

  Lumpy come pudding. I'm thinking like one kid in particular. He always, and he would have tapioca at lunch. I was like, ah.

• 1:01:23Speaker 06

  Oh, chocolate pudding or nothing?

• 1:01:25Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, dude. By the way, then pudding is like also like, I don't even know about pudding.

• 1:01:29Speaker 06

  Chocolate pudding rules.

• 1:01:30Andrew Santino?

  Fine. Fine. It's fine. I'll take a chocolate shake over any fucking pudding.

• 1:01:35Speaker 06

  Absolutely.

• 1:01:36Andrew Santino?

  Well, that's what I mean. It's like.

• 1:01:37Speaker 06

  I'll do a fudgicle over all of them.

• 1:01:38Andrew Santino?

  We're Sweet Treat Boys again.

• 1:01:39Speaker 06

  Oh, Sweet Treat Boys. Um, tapioca pudding is legit.

• 1:01:44Andrew Santino?

  It's the grossest thing in the world. You know how dumb I am? I actually don't even know what it is. Do you know what it is?

• 1:01:49Speaker 06

  Yes.

• 1:01:49Andrew Santino?

  What is it?

• 1:01:50Speaker 06

  It's mule come.

• 1:01:52Andrew Santino?

  Shut up.

• 1:01:52Speaker 06

  With bits of fruit in it.

• 1:01:54Andrew Santino?

  Okay, tapioca pudding. I genuinely want to know what it is. Here we go. Tapioca pudding, sweet gelatinous, already I'm out. A sweet pudding made with, uh, coconut milk is used in cases. Sweet pudding made with tapioca. Tapioca for references. A starch extracted from the tubers of the cassava plant. Species of.

• 1:02:15Speaker 06

  We all know that.

• 1:02:16Andrew Santino?

  North Brazil. It's a perennial shrub. It's a staple food.

• 1:02:21Speaker 06

  Thing you're called. That sounds like an old insult. You perennial shrub.

• 1:02:24Andrew Santino?

  Perennial shrub?

• 1:02:25Speaker 06

  Look at you. You're a perennial shrub.

• 1:02:27Andrew Santino?

  It's staple food for millions of people in tropical countries. It provides only carbohydrate food value. Only carbs.

• 1:02:32Speaker 06

  Only carbs?

• 1:02:33Andrew Santino?

  No, almost no protein or vitamins or minerals.

• 1:02:36Speaker 06

  Really?

• 1:02:36Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, that's what it says.

• 1:02:37Speaker 06

  Just makes you fat?

• 1:02:38Andrew Santino?

  Yeah. And it says, in other countries, it's used as a thickening agent in various manufactured foods to help it give some gut to it.

• 1:02:44Speaker 06

  Some gravitas?

• 1:02:46Andrew Santino?

  It's derived from, uh, the tupi language in Brazil. So shout out Brazil. Sorry, dude. Tapioca pudding.

• 1:02:51Speaker 06

  That's where you get those fat butts.

• 1:02:53Andrew Santino?

  That, that tapioca dog.

• 1:02:55Speaker 06

  You got them tapioca puddings.

• 1:02:56Andrew Santino?

  It's bullshit though.

• 1:02:57Speaker 06

  Look at her wagging around that tapioca butt.

• 1:02:59Andrew Santino?

  But this is one of those things that happened. I want to know, British school children traditionally. Name the dish Frog Spawn. Frog jizz.

• 1:03:07Speaker 06

  Oh, Frog Spawn?

• 1:03:08Andrew Santino?

  That's cool.

• 1:03:09Speaker 06

  Oh, look, oh, I didn't want to eat Frog Spawn.

• 1:03:12Andrew Santino?

  The Guardian described it as Britain's most hated school pudding. I thought you want to have Frog Spawn again, Mum?

• 1:03:18Speaker 06

  Oh, Mum, this is another thing of tapioca.

• 1:03:21Andrew Santino?

  But here's the lie. You know when sometimes foods, they keep shoving it on us and you're like, we don't like this? It's making a comeback in its 21st century Michelin starred restaurants. Uh, it's so funny. Who's doing this? They're putting it on us. No one likes it. It's not good. They keep sneaking dishes. And I'm gonna say this. Brussels sprouts are fucking bullshit.

• 1:03:39Speaker 06

  Stop with it.

• 1:03:40Andrew Santino?

  They keep sneaking it in meals and dishes.

• 1:03:42Speaker 06

  If it, I don't care if it brought bacon with it.

• 1:03:45Andrew Santino?

  Just give me bacon on its own.

• 1:03:46Speaker 06

  Get out of here.

• 1:03:47Andrew Santino?

  Just get the fuck out of here, Brussels sprouts. I'm, dude, I'm sick of this game we play with, with like, dude, you have to try ours. Every time I go to a restaurant and like, dude, you gotta try this Brussels sprout dish. It's fucking dog shit. I burp it up for the next three and a half hours.

• 1:04:00Speaker 06

  I'm just letting you know, putting a target on your back. I don't mean to be all MTV The Challenge, but you're putting a target on your back.

• 1:04:07Andrew Santino?

  Dude, get fucked. The Brussels community can get fucked.

• 1:04:09Speaker 06

  They are the Swifties of veggies.

• 1:04:11Andrew Santino?

  I know, dude. People like them.

• 1:04:12Speaker 06

  Brussels sprout fans will terrorize your life.

• 1:04:15Andrew Santino?

  They suck. I've never once had one and been like-

• 1:04:17Speaker 06

  Oh, blue cheese is involved now. Get out of my face.

• 1:04:20Andrew Santino?

  What is blue cheese doing over here?

• 1:04:21Speaker 06

  I don't know.

• 1:04:22Andrew Santino?

  You don't like blue cheese?

• 1:04:23Speaker 06

  I love it.

• 1:04:24Andrew Santino?

  Oh, I was just gonna say.

• 1:04:25Speaker 06

  I love it. I think I've been burned a couple of times by it. I love blue cheese.

• 1:04:28Andrew Santino?

  Yeah. Blue cheese stuffed olives?

• 1:04:29Speaker 06

  I can't, stuffed olives are new to me.

• 1:04:33Andrew Santino?

  Blue cheese stuffed olives might be the best olives to ever been, ever walked the earth. I mean, blue cheese, for some reason, the little that you get from it. And the little, the, the little, the soft, like, like baby snap of an olive with a blue cheese kiss.

• 1:04:50Speaker 06

  I'd try it.

• 1:04:50Andrew Santino?

  Woo!

• 1:04:51Speaker 06

  I'd try it.

• 1:04:51Andrew Santino?

  Woo! Big, big, big fan.

• 1:04:53Speaker 06

  I'm not writing them off like Brussels sprouts.

• 1:04:55Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, Brussels sprouts can kick fucking rocks down the road. What other food can kick rocks down the fucking road?

• 1:05:00Speaker 06

  I don't know, cuz I'm, I, asparagus is, I've never been a fan.

• 1:05:05Andrew Santino?

  It's a fake vegetable. Not real. No one likes it.

• 1:05:07Speaker 06

  Never been a fan.

• 1:05:07Andrew Santino?

  You drown it in butter and salt. It's fake.

• 1:05:09Speaker 06

  It, it, it's just like, what are you eating? Seaweed?

• 1:05:11Andrew Santino?

  It's fake. It's bullshit.

• 1:05:13Speaker 06

  Actual seaweed too. Get out of here.

• 1:05:15Andrew Santino?

  Get the fuck out of here, seaweed.

• 1:05:17Speaker 06

  I don't want you.

• 1:05:17Andrew Santino?

  Give me chips, yeah. Yeah, my wife does that. She eats like seaweed crisps and I'm always like, it, they stink like shit and they're not good. And she's like, it's a healthy snack. I'm like, just eat a regular unhealthy snack and then- Live with it.

• 1:05:31Speaker 06

  Yeah. And just don't eat the real healthy stuff.

• 1:05:33Andrew Santino?

  And who cares? And also, just don't eat too many of it.

• 1:05:35Speaker 06

  Snacks by nature are not healthy.

• 1:05:37Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, and so just have the unhealthy one and just be, just be okay with that, but don't eat, don't eat all of it. Yeah, or just don't eat as much as you usually wanted to. Like, don't eat the whole bag of chips.

• 1:05:46Speaker 06

  Do you pig out around Christmas?

• 1:05:47Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, I'm a little fat boy in the holidays. Like a, like a disgusting fat boy. I eat everything all the time.

• 1:05:53Speaker 06

  And now it's Easter and I'm holding on to Easter candy and I'm just like, dude.

• 1:05:57Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you said that in the hotel.

• 1:05:57Speaker 06

  But Christmas, you're just like, let's fucking rip.

• 1:06:00Andrew Santino?

  Let's go, dude. Christmas, because-

• 1:06:02Speaker 06

  Thanksgiving brings it in and you go, Thanksgiving's like-

• 1:06:04Andrew Santino?

  Starts it off.

• 1:06:05Speaker 06

  It's like that first meal where you're like, eat big, because winter's coming.

• 1:06:10Andrew Santino?

  Especially out here, it's 67 degrees, like, winter's coming, dude.

• 1:06:12Speaker 06

  Oh dude, and out, out east, you feel like you're doing it for nature.

• 1:06:16Andrew Santino?

  You have to. You have to stay warm.

• 1:06:17Speaker 06

  Yes.

• 1:06:18Andrew Santino?

  How are you gonna keep your wife warm if you're not a little extra?

• 1:06:20Speaker 06

  I'm a little big boy. I'm a little big boy in the winter. I wanna be a little Santa Claus.

• 1:06:24Andrew Santino?

  Bob's a little big boy.

• 1:06:26Speaker 06

  Exactly.

• 1:06:26Andrew Santino?

  I go, I go, I go, yeah. I've had some really tou- like, I, we talked yesterday a little bit. The biggest I've been was two, over the holidays, two 11, two 12?

• 1:06:41Speaker 06

  That's my ideal walk around.

• 1:06:43Andrew Santino?

  But my walk around is, my ideal number is 197, that's my favorite. If I can stay at 197, I'm over 200 now. But if I can kiss 197, 198, woo!

• 1:06:54Speaker 06

  Young people, you have no idea what we're talking about. You just don't, what are you talking about? You exercise like three times a day happens, and you get to your 40s and your metabolism's like, good luck.

• 1:07:02Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, I'm working out three, four days a week, it doesn't fucking matter, your body's like, get fucked, nerd.

• 1:07:07Speaker 06

  Oh, you wanted M&M's? So now I'm just, I just fell back into it. And now I gotta get out of the pool.

• 1:07:12Andrew Santino?

  No, I think she's staying in the sweetie pool, dude.

• 1:07:13Speaker 06

  Oh dude, getting really big.

• 1:07:15Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you, you getting very fat would be hilarious.

• 1:07:18Speaker 06

  I would die quickly. My body's not built for that. I'm built for tall and lank.

• 1:07:22Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you're not built to be a fat guy. You don't look like a fat guy.

• 1:07:25Speaker 06

  Yeah, once I quit soda, it came off like pretty quick.

• 1:07:29Andrew Santino?

  But you still, you don't even have diet soda?

• 1:07:31Speaker 06

  No, but Thanksgiving to New Year's.

• 1:07:34Andrew Santino?

  Whatever you want, dude. No rules apply.

• 1:07:36Speaker 06

  Dude, that first ginger ale back.

• 1:07:39Andrew Santino?

  Can I tell you?

• 1:07:39Speaker 06

  Full go.

• 1:07:40Andrew Santino?

  Cracked myself a ginger last night, dude.

• 1:07:42Speaker 06

  How great are they?

• 1:07:42Andrew Santino?

  Dude, ginger ale's so fucking good, and you know why?

• 1:07:44Speaker 06

  Canada Dry?

• 1:07:45Andrew Santino?

  There is only one, my friend.

• 1:07:47Speaker 06

  Goddamn right.

• 1:07:48Andrew Santino?

  And if you're a Schweppes guy, dude.

• 1:07:49Speaker 06

  I'll see you.

• 1:07:50Andrew Santino?

  I'll see you, but.

• 1:07:51Speaker 06

  I'll see you, and now, if you're a-

• 1:07:53Andrew Santino?

  You're just not competing.

• 1:07:54Speaker 06

  If you're a Seagram's guy, don't look at me in my face.

• 1:07:56Andrew Santino?

  Seagram's?

• 1:07:57Speaker 06

  Seagram's ginger ale?

• 1:07:58Andrew Santino?

  That's mixer.

• 1:07:59Speaker 06

  Only mixer.

• 1:07:59Andrew Santino?

  That's mixer ginger ale.

• 1:08:00Speaker 06

  It, honestly, the booze makes that ginger ale taste better.

• 1:08:03Andrew Santino?

  A hundred percent, but Canada Dry is the one, dude. Shout out to our boys up north.

• 1:08:06Speaker 06

  You fucking-

• 1:08:07Andrew Santino?

  Canada Dry is the one, dude.

• 1:08:08Speaker 06

  Better have no tariffs on that.

• 1:08:10Andrew Santino?

  No ta- don't be ta- we're not gonna tax ginger ale.

• 1:08:14Speaker 06

  Love Canada Dry.

• 1:08:15Andrew Santino?

  That's the one thing he doesn't tax, is ginger ale.

• 1:08:17Speaker 06

  I would, I'd be like, okay, there is some-

• 1:08:19Andrew Santino?

  He's got some opinions that I like, okay?

• 1:08:21Speaker 06

  What you don't like, you go, excluding Canada Dry from the tariffs was incredible for me. Yeah, they, it's, in a can, a cold Canada Dry.

• 1:08:31Andrew Santino?

  Talk to me, dude.

• 1:08:32Speaker 06

  And I talk about this ad nauseam, and I will until the day I die.

• 1:08:34Andrew Santino?

  I had one last night.

• 1:08:35Speaker 06

  A sandwich with a cold Canada Dry.

• 1:08:39Andrew Santino?

  Come on, dude. A sub with a bag of chips and a ginger ale is like, dude, talk to me.

• 1:08:44Speaker 06

  What are you doing to me?

• 1:08:45Andrew Santino?

  What are you doing? Well, that's why, dude, I've, my favorite drink for years was whiskey ginger. I loved it so fucking much. And then came the new era of people going, ginger beer, ginger ale? I'm like, ginger, ginger p- ginger ale.

• 1:08:58Speaker 06

  Ale.

• 1:08:58Andrew Santino?

  Ginger beer is not, that's, get out of here, dude.

• 1:09:02Speaker 06

  It's like spicy, it's, that sucks.

• 1:09:04Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, is this, is there like turmeric in there? Like, what the fuck is in this?

• 1:09:07Speaker 06

  It's like, they have pulp, like orange juice?

• 1:09:09Andrew Santino?

  It tastes like what a guy who's a mixologist would recommend to you, cause they go, you have to try ours, we put ginger beer in it.

• 1:09:15Speaker 06

  Yeah, it's like those white guys that sleep on those Japanese beds on the floor, and they go, it's good for your back, and you go, fuck you. How about a fucking king size bed that's soft, you dildo? I'm not laying down on the ground for my back, you fucking asshole.

• 1:09:28Andrew Santino?

  Dude, I already raked your fucking zen garden, I'm not sleeping on the floor.

• 1:09:31Speaker 06

  Stop with whatever this is. She's not coming back, Miho's not coming back, or whatever the Japanese lady is who left.

• 1:09:38Andrew Santino?

  You know, you go through, you have a friend that goes through their Japanese phase, like, we had, I had a homie that had a Japanese face.

• 1:09:43Speaker 06

  Now we're older, it's happening.

• 1:09:45Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, my buddy, my, my buddy that has Japanese face, it's insane, dude. He literally put like-

• 1:09:51Speaker 06

  It's, when you're young, it's white dudes acting black, and when you're older, it's white guys acting Japanese. Like, going through that, like, eastern zen.

• 1:09:59Andrew Santino?

  Because they're having a midlife crisis and they're like, dude, I have to retransform how I have my dojo. You're like, don't say dojo, dude. This is my layer, man.

• 1:10:06Speaker 06

  Sleeping in silk is actually very comfortable.

• 1:10:08Andrew Santino?

  You're like, Mark, you say that again, I'll fucking beat the shit out of you.

• 1:10:10Speaker 06

  You know, there's an eastern saying.

• 1:10:12Andrew Santino?

  Fuck that guy, shut up.

• 1:10:14Speaker 06

  That's like when you were in high school, he's like, yo, for real though, that guy's like.

• 1:10:18Andrew Santino?

  That guy's the same guy.

• 1:10:19Speaker 06

  Yeah, he goes, oh, you would be amazed with what they can do with tofu. Oh, the cuisine in Tokyo.

• 1:10:27Andrew Santino?

  That's the same guy that goes, that's, I'm saying, I'm saying though, I'm saying though.

• 1:10:30Speaker 06

  Ay, for real though, he turned into Okinawa in the fall is breathtaking.

• 1:10:35Andrew Santino?

  Unbeatable, that's so good. Have you seen the cherry blossoms? Have you seen them? That is genuinely that same guy.

• 1:10:42Speaker 06

  With a stop in country in between. I actually know, they either go country or Japanese. Like the guys that now are like, because I pull up my buckle and I get real now. Like 20 years ago, they're like, I'm cleaning out my closet. I've seen like memes about that and you're absolutely correct about it.

• 1:10:59Andrew Santino?

  A hundred percent true.

• 1:11:00Speaker 06

  It's a hundred percent true.

• 1:11:00Andrew Santino?

  Well, people are going country now. We've like, we've had a lot of comics move to Austin. And like, got people we know have like turned into this like, they've adopted the Texas way a little bit, which always kinda.

• 1:11:12Speaker 06

  Which is hilarious.

• 1:11:12Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it's interesting.

• 1:11:13Speaker 06

  Because I, I might be guilty of it on some level, but just me moving to New York and wearing a leather jacket and being like, can you fucking believe this? And they're like, Dan, you're from Aurora, Colorado. I'm like, yeah, I live in the story of Queens. Nah, this is who I fucking am. Yeah, bro, go bitch.

• 1:11:31Andrew Santino?

  But the Texas is harder to adopt for me because it's such a personality change. When you like, the clothing from Aurora to New York, it's not insanely different.

• 1:11:42Speaker 06

  No, in fact, there is the Venn diagram.

• 1:11:45Andrew Santino?

  The clothing from anywhere to Texas is like, you, that is your belt?

• 1:11:49Speaker 06

  The only time it translates, it's like, oh, Oklahoma to Texas? Or like fucking Kansas to Texas?

• 1:11:54Andrew Santino?

  These are kinda one of the same.

• 1:11:55Speaker 06

  You know, yeah, we get it.

• 1:11:56Andrew Santino?

  They kiss the same, they kiss the same, you know?

• 1:11:57Speaker 06

  But you move over and then you're like, what is this?

• 1:12:00Andrew Santino?

  But whenever I go down there, I'm always like, the hat, the hat thing. The hat cowboy hat thing for some reason, I don't, I have like this weird.

• 1:12:06Speaker 06

  You couldn't do it?

• 1:12:07Andrew Santino?

  I just, it doesn't, I don't, something about it.

• 1:12:09Speaker 06

  I would feel like everyone that looked at me would go.

• 1:12:10Andrew Santino?

  You're not a cowboy dude.

• 1:12:12Speaker 06

  Anybody could get me to take off a cowboy hat by doing this, by walking up to me going, what are you doing? That's all they'd have to say to me. They'd just have to walk up to me and they'd go, what are you doing? And you go like this, I don't fucking know.

• 1:12:22Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, but you have to do it probably like, I'm sorry ma'am, ma'am.

• 1:12:26Speaker 06

  Well.

• 1:12:26Andrew Santino?

  It's just such a costume change.

• 1:12:28Speaker 06

  I feel like a fucking poser. Stop talking like Sam Elliott. Well, I moved down here. You gotta understand, you're living down in Texas, you gotta completely change who you are as a person.

• 1:12:41Andrew Santino?

  That sounds exactly like that dude.

• 1:12:43Speaker 06

  I'm a, I was Jewish from the Upper East Side of Manhattan.

• 1:12:47Andrew Santino?

  Was he really?

• 1:12:47Speaker 06

  No.

• 1:12:48Andrew Santino?

  Oh, that'd be so funny if that was true though.

• 1:12:49Speaker 06

  Young Sam Elliott's like, I don't like it, I said I wanted a bite. Well, then I moved down to Lubbock, Texas, and well, things changed.

• 1:12:58Andrew Santino?

  Honestly though, it would not surprise me if that was his story.

• 1:13:01Speaker 06

  If you find out like.

• 1:13:02Andrew Santino?

  Where's he from?

• 1:13:03Speaker 06

  Oh, he's gotta be from Texas.

• 1:13:05Andrew Santino?

  You say this dude, you say this, but honestly, I'm gonna blow your fucking mind.

• 1:13:09Speaker 06

  Oh dude, if it's like Bangor, Maine.

• 1:13:11Andrew Santino?

  Dude, Sam Elliott, Sam, Pack Elliott, Pack is a tight middle name.

• 1:13:16Speaker 06

  Sick name.

• 1:13:17Andrew Santino?

  University of Oregon, by the way.

• 1:13:19Speaker 06

  Go Ducks.

• 1:13:21Andrew Santino?

  Oh, sorry, University of Oregon Clark College. What the fuck is that?

• 1:13:25Speaker 06

  Go Nut Ducks.

• 1:13:26Andrew Santino?

  Go Duck, go, go.

• 1:13:28Speaker 06

  Go Non Ducks.

• 1:13:29Andrew Santino?

  Sacramento, California.

• 1:13:31Speaker 06

  No way, Sac Town?

• 1:13:32Andrew Santino?

  Up your fucking ass dude.

• 1:13:33Speaker 06

  Are you, where is he from in Sacramento? Like North, like Davis?

• 1:13:37Andrew Santino?

  Well, let's get into early life dude.

• 1:13:38Speaker 06

  I wanna get.

• 1:13:38Andrew Santino?

  My favorite thing to click on is early life on Wikipedia.

• 1:13:41Speaker 06

  Where did he?

• 1:13:41Andrew Santino?

  Samuel Pack Elliott was born August 9th, 1944, at the Sato Memorial Hospital in Sacramento, California, the son of Glenn Mammy.

• 1:13:48Speaker 06

  Okay.

• 1:13:48Andrew Santino?

  At Texas, uh, his, okay, Glenn was a Texas state driving, diving champion in high school, later physical training instructor and a high school teacher. Alright, okay, okay, hold on, his parents were originally from El Paso.

• 1:14:00Speaker 06

  There you go.

• 1:14:01Andrew Santino?

  And his Elliott ancestors, uh, his.

• 1:14:05Andrew Santino?

  Served as a surgeon at the Battle of San Jacinto. Moved from California to Portland, Oregon, even less Texas, when he was 13.

• 1:14:14Speaker 06

  Well, dude, I don't know if you've ever had a vegan muffin. But there's a chance that that thing has zero dairy. I'm talking about zero animal harm on that damn muffin.

• 1:14:26Andrew Santino?

  Elliot spent his teenage years living in northeast Portland.

• 1:14:29Speaker 06

  My pronouns, if you want to know how I like my ale. It's independent.

• 1:14:35Andrew Santino?

  Dude, northeast Portland.

• 1:14:37Speaker 06

  That's wild.

• 1:14:38Andrew Santino?

  Brother, then he went to University of Oregon as an English psychology major, two terms before he dropped out. Returned to Portland to attend Clark College in nearby Vancouver, Washington.

• 1:14:46Speaker 06

  Yeah, shout out Vancouver, Washington, not.

• 1:14:48Andrew Santino?

  Where he's cast in a play, a production of Guys and Dolls. Then he went down that road. Uh, enrolled at the Sigma Alpha Epsilon fraternity, dropped out again after his father died of a heart attack.

• 1:14:57Speaker 06

  Damn.

• 1:14:58Andrew Santino?

  Relocated to LA. Come on, dude, this is all phony baloney, stinky pony.

• 1:15:03Speaker 06

  I don't know what you're doing.

• 1:15:05Andrew Santino?

  This is phony baloney, stinky pony, dude.

• 1:15:06Speaker 06

  I mean, the commercials with Gronk were bad enough, but now this?

• 1:15:09Andrew Santino?

  Elliot worked construction while studying acting, served at the California Air National Guard uh, at Van Nuys Airport before the unit moved to Channel Islands and National Guard stayed in. But also, to be fair, this guy's the fucking man. I love him anyway.

• 1:15:19Speaker 06

  He's a icon.

• 1:15:20Andrew Santino?

  But I'm a little shocked.

• 1:15:21Speaker 06

  It's so funny.

• 1:15:22Andrew Santino?

  I'm a little shocked. I wanted him to be from.

• 1:15:24Speaker 06

  I used to work at a bookstore selling only gay poems. Now, well, dude, sometimes you grow up. Flyin' the freak flag, Portland. Portland, Oregon.

• 1:15:40Andrew Santino?

  Keep it weird.

• 1:15:41Speaker 06

  It's where you go to get. That's so funny.

• 1:15:44Andrew Santino?

  It's so weird that he's from there. It's like a.

• 1:15:46Speaker 06

  Dude, I've seen protests about stuff like traffic lights.

• 1:15:52Speaker 06

  I ain't never gonna misgender nothing, fella. I'm, I'm a cowboy from Portland.

• 1:15:57Andrew Santino?

  Someone's like, hey, lady, give me that back. He's like, there are the.

• 1:16:00Speaker 06

  Hey, that's not how she identifies, dude. And you know that.

• 1:16:05Andrew Santino?

  Woke Lebowski would be so fucking incredible.

• 1:16:08Speaker 06

  Hey dude, I don't like the way you're talking. Sometimes people, well, sometimes people don't have a sex.

• 1:16:16Andrew Santino?

  What does every, what does anything have to do with crypto, man?

• 1:16:18Speaker 06

  Yeah, he goes, well, dude, not all money is just cash. And here in Portland, we have the finest independent breweries.

• 1:16:27Andrew Santino?

  So they them, dude.

• 1:16:28Speaker 06

  It's a they them.

• 1:16:29Andrew Santino?

  True first is of us, they them.

• 1:16:30Speaker 06

  Shut the fuck up, Donny. Dude, uh.

• 1:16:33Andrew Santino?

  Ward Lebowski?

• 1:16:34Speaker 06

  That fucked me up, man.

• 1:16:35Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, I'm sorry.

• 1:16:36Speaker 06

  He's from Portland.

• 1:16:37Andrew Santino?

  No, well, he's from Sacramento, but then Portland.

• 1:16:39Speaker 06

  Sac, Sac town.

• 1:16:40Andrew Santino?

  But Sac is actually.

• 1:16:41Speaker 06

  More, it's pretty farm, there's a lot of farms.

• 1:16:44Andrew Santino?

  Well, there is some, but.

• 1:16:45Speaker 06

  Outside, like north of.

• 1:16:46Andrew Santino?

  No, there are, there are for sure, but I think.

• 1:16:47Speaker 06

  My grandma lived in Lake County forever.

• 1:16:49Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, there's farms in Sac.

• 1:16:50Speaker 06

  I drive Sacramento to Lake County and there's like a lot of farms.

• 1:16:52Andrew Santino?

  No, there is for sure, but it's very much California.

• 1:16:55Speaker 06

  Yeah, it is like, what's up, bro?

• 1:16:57Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:16:58Speaker 06

  That's why I think it's so funny.

• 1:16:59Andrew Santino?

  There's your beats.

• 1:17:00Speaker 06

  That's why I always, whenever I was, yeah, it's so funny, like California, when you get outside and they're like kinda country, you're like, but you're California.

• 1:17:07Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, but that, but most of those guys, they don't have an accent, but they have an attitude. So they have the farmer's attitude without the accent.

• 1:17:16Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:17:16Andrew Santino?

  Like when you go to the South, they're like, y'all ain't supposed to be on my land, but up there they're like, hey, bro, can't be on my fucking land, dude.

• 1:17:22Speaker 06

  Not fucking chill that you're up here.

• 1:17:24Andrew Santino?

  Turn around and fuck off, dude.

• 1:17:27Speaker 06

  Bro, I'm about to fucking split you. I got a fucking rifle and a hunting dog.

• 1:17:32Andrew Santino?

  Click clack, dude, 12 gauge, coming up your fucking ass, dude.

• 1:17:35Speaker 06

  Defense myself, bro. Dude, this cup keeps the cattle in, bro.

• 1:17:39Andrew Santino?

  Why do they never make on SNL, the Midland Californians?

• 1:17:42Speaker 06

  Yeah, where they're like, dude, I go on down there, well, the Colorado accent is like the only thing that is a little California where they'll be like.

• 1:17:49Andrew Santino?

  It is.

• 1:17:49Speaker 06

  Bro, I fucking went up to Vail and it's like that kind of.

• 1:17:53Andrew Santino?

  Well, especially mountain people out there, they do have the bro more than anything.

• 1:17:56Speaker 06

  They're like, fucking, but there are a lot of those guys are transplants, so it's like a, an amalgamation of several different accents.

• 1:18:02Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 1:18:03Speaker 06

  It's like, uh, T1000 in the goo, just a bunch of different people.

• 1:18:06Andrew Santino?

  Everything at once?

• 1:18:07Speaker 06

  Yeah, and they're like, I'm lying.

• 1:18:09Andrew Santino?

  San Diego's the only one in California that is very distinct, it's very definitive, cause San Diego's like, oh, bro, fucking, uh, what's that? Oh, bro, bro, fucking, uh.

• 1:18:18Speaker 06

  Were there a lot of kids from San Diego at ASU?

• 1:18:20Andrew Santino?

  That's how I moved here was from, one, my, my boy Colin is Northern California. And everyone else was Southern California.

• 1:18:27Speaker 06

  Yes.

• 1:18:27Andrew Santino?

  My roommates were all San Diego.

• 1:18:29Speaker 06

  Arizona was the same.

• 1:18:30Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:18:30Speaker 06

  It was Long Island and San Diego.

• 1:18:32Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, Long Island, yeah, it was so funny. That is so funny.

• 1:18:34Speaker 06

  What a clash.

• 1:18:35Andrew Santino?

  Yeah. That is so funny. They were like rich kids from Long Island.

• 1:18:38Speaker 06

  Yeah, dude.

• 1:18:39Andrew Santino?

  And then all San Diego kids.

• 1:18:40Speaker 06

  What's funny about the rich kids from Long Island is they would really go like, I'm from New York. And then you're like, where are you from in New York? And they go, I'm from New York. And you're like, where in New York? They're like, Long Island. And you're like, that's pretty far away from Manhattan.

• 1:18:53Andrew Santino?

  Where in Long Island?

• 1:18:54Speaker 06

  And then they're like, Syosset. Like, Moron Concomode, fucking dickhead. Just fucking guys. It's so funny to watch that.

• 1:19:03Andrew Santino?

  Syosset's a great drop, by the way.

• 1:19:04Speaker 06

  But it was like, you like learned that in college. Cause freshman year, anyone from Long Island, I thought you were growing up in.

• 1:19:10Andrew Santino?

  In the city.

• 1:19:11Speaker 06

  I thought you were growing up like, oh, it was like Brooklyn then you.

• 1:19:13Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 1:19:14Speaker 06

  And you go, it is Brooklyn then you, and it's like.

• 1:19:16Andrew Santino?

  It's Brooklyn you, then it's you. You don't know how long Long Island was until I drove it one time. I was like, this is fucking the worst.

• 1:19:23Speaker 06

  It's crazy.

• 1:19:23Andrew Santino?

  It's forever. It's fucking forever.

• 1:19:26Speaker 06

  But honestly, the people are like, it's an acquired taste, but once you like it, you're like, love them.

• 1:19:33Andrew Santino?

  Well, it's, it's, it's a beautiful, it's like a beautiful endless suburb. It really does feel like a movie studio made Long Island. Do you know what I mean? Like that was, that was like MGM made that in the seventies.

• 1:19:43Speaker 06

  Well, I mean, they really, that, um, Levittown was the first suburb in America.

• 1:19:48Andrew Santino?

  Seriously?

• 1:19:49Speaker 06

  After World War Two. Yeah. That's where.

• 1:19:51Andrew Santino?

  Those are people like, we gotta get the fuck out of Manhattan.

• 1:19:53Speaker 06

  I'm not fucking living here.

• 1:19:54Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, Manhattan.

• 1:19:54Speaker 06

  Oh my god, I need a store. My husband can't sleep at night because he killed a bunch of Japanese boys. You don't even realize that. Oh, so I drop a book and my husband shits himself because he fought in Normandy. So what? It's fucking those guys.

• 1:20:10Andrew Santino?

  We wanna have the boat this summer. I'm not getting on boats, Trish.

• 1:20:13Speaker 06

  I can't go on a boat. It ah, then she's crying, he goes, god damn it, you cried, the kids cried.

• 1:20:19Andrew Santino?

  God Trish, when you cry, the baby screams.

• 1:20:21Speaker 06

  Those guys dude, that generation, coming home.

• 1:20:24Andrew Santino?

  Real, like real fucking tough men.

• 1:20:27Speaker 06

  It's so funny because now they're all like dead and their kids are old and they're like looking down at us going like, they're like almost doing a thing where they're like, we're World War II. And you go, no, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no, I respect you for serving in Vietnam, but no, no, no, no, no.

• 1:20:44Andrew Santino?

  You're not, you're not those guys.

• 1:20:45Speaker 06

  What happened to kids? He goes, you raised them.

• 1:20:48Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it's your fucking fault.

• 1:20:49Speaker 06

  That's the one I was doing, they go like, these millennials, and you go, you fucking raised them.

• 1:20:53Andrew Santino?

  It's you.

• 1:20:53Speaker 06

  You were the manager on duty.

• 1:20:55Andrew Santino?

  Came from your balls dude.

• 1:20:55Speaker 06

  You were the manager on duty. You wanted it better, you should have fucking been a better leader. What the fuck? We suck and then the next generation you go, okay, that is us. That's where you go like, okay.

• 1:21:06Andrew Santino?

  That's unmistakably us.

• 1:21:08Speaker 06

  Some of us, some of us, some of the people I knew having kids at eighteen, nineteen, shouldn't have been the people having kids at eighteen, nineteen. You go like, oh fuck.

• 1:21:17Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, but that's, but that is, that is kinda how it works. You know, like, my buddy that had two kids, too young, you're like, yeah, he would, and actually ended up figuring it out, but you're like, that is who has, he's got, it's gotta be him.

• 1:21:30Speaker 06

  Pargetzi had one of my favorite jokes of all time where he was like, you watch Sixteen and Pregnant and you go, they actually kinda got it figured out. He goes, cause then they have the kid and then the kid's like, you know, you're in your thirties, you can still live your life and the kid's out of the house.

• 1:21:41Andrew Santino?

  It is so true. No, honestly, it is true. I think about that. Like now, all my friends, like some of our closest friends, cause we don't have kids.

• 1:21:47Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:21:48Andrew Santino?

  Some of our closest friends are in their late, or mid to late fifties, cause their kids are grown up now.

• 1:21:52Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:21:52Andrew Santino?

  So I was like, we're hanging out with those people because.

• 1:21:54Speaker 06

  Cause they're free.

• 1:21:55Andrew Santino?

  Cause all my homies all have kids.

• 1:21:57Speaker 06

  Yeah, they're all like, dude, I gotta go home.

• 1:21:58Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:21:59Speaker 06

  Like whenever we do the regs, Liz is like, I got the baby, I gotta go back to the baby. And you're like, oh yeah, totally.

• 1:22:03Andrew Santino?

  Yeah. It is, that, but honestly, and I'm probably, I don't, are you guys gonna have them or you don't know? No. Yeah, see, we aren't either and. It is kind of a beautiful little nugget of we're in this midlife where things are okay. And we're doing good and we're hanging out with people who are a little bit older, a little bit more experienced because they've gone through the thing. But they don't make you feel bad or weird about not having a family where kids are, people our age are like, you guys aren't gonna do it dude, why don't you fucking? And they kind of like pushing on you.

• 1:22:32Speaker 06

  Do you remember, um, was there ever a moment in high school where you didn't have a job and your friends had a job?

• 1:22:38Andrew Santino?

  Oh, what the fuck?

• 1:22:39Speaker 06

  That's a, that was the feeling of like, where they go like, I mean, I gotta go, I gotta go to work. I don't know what you're gonna do and you're like.

• 1:22:44Andrew Santino?

  Well, I'm gonna get high.

• 1:22:45Speaker 06

  Yeah, get high. Uh, nothing? And they're like, okay, it's just like, uh, I gotta go to work. And you're like, why are you being weird to me?

• 1:22:53Andrew Santino?

  No, I don't know. It's just, I feel like you'd understand it if you could understand it, but you don't.

• 1:22:57Speaker 06

  I, what, the ones, the ones I rock with are my friends that have kids that go like, you're not wrong.

• 1:23:03Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, dude.

• 1:23:05Speaker 06

  You go, alright, thank you. And I'm glad you have a form of love that I will never know.

• 1:23:09Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 1:23:09Speaker 06

  Trade off.

• 1:23:10Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 1:23:11Speaker 06

  That you go like, that is pretty sick that you do that. And you go, it is.

• 1:23:14Andrew Santino?

  Hell, yeah.

• 1:23:15Speaker 06

  And thank you for admitting it. You know what it is? That's why this country's so broken right now is because people can't even come to the middle a little bit to do that, to go like, hey, you're probably gonna have a love that I will never feel because you're having a kid.

• 1:23:27Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:23:28Speaker 06

  But, uh, give it to me that you're like, that excess cash has gotta be sick.

• 1:23:32Andrew Santino?

  Yeah. I'm going to Paris in a month.

• 1:23:34Speaker 06

  And why don't I take us all out to dinner?

• 1:23:36Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 1:23:36Speaker 06

  You know?

• 1:23:37Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, that's true.

• 1:23:37Speaker 06

  Let me fucking foot the bill.

• 1:23:38Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 1:23:39Speaker 06

  Instead of going like, ah, you fuck, it's just like, it didn't work out.

• 1:23:42Andrew Santino?

  It is what it is.

• 1:23:43Speaker 06

  It is what it is.

• 1:23:44Andrew Santino?

  Yeah. Well.

• 1:23:46Speaker 06

  Cause I'm all for, dude, here's the way I feel like, whatever you wanna do, do it. Whatever's gonna make you feel content in this life.

• 1:23:53Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:23:53Speaker 06

  Do it. As long as it ain't hurting anyone else, jobless dude. Go rip it.

• 1:23:58Andrew Santino?

  Jobless.

• 1:23:58Speaker 06

  Jobless.

• 1:23:59Andrew Santino?

  Jobless.

• 1:24:00Speaker 06

  But I don't wanna fucking, I don't, I'm not gonna be like, I'm always, I'm too stupid to have an opinion for someone else.

• 1:24:07Andrew Santino?

  Oh, that's really good. That's a soderism.

• 1:24:10Speaker 06

  But I'm just too dumb to go like, you shouldn't wanna do that. I go like, wow, fuck it. I've seen people in this business, they go, I wouldn't fucking do it. They're selling out fucking football stadiums?

• 1:24:20Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:24:20Speaker 06

  And you go, yeah, cuz they did that. And you go, fuck, that's so smart.

• 1:24:23Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 1:24:24Speaker 06

  That's, I'd never have that thing where I'm like, fuck that. I'm always like, ah, I'm an idiot.

• 1:24:29Andrew Santino?

  Yeah. How did you do that?

• 1:24:31Speaker 06

  Yeah. Do you ever, remember when you were real little, like in elementary school and you watch people, you do like folding with paper?

• 1:24:37Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:24:38Speaker 06

  And there'd be those kids in class that would fold it perfectly.

• 1:24:41Speaker 00

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• 1:25:16Speaker 06

  My shit was always like this.

• 1:25:18Andrew Santino?

  Oh, come on, bro.

• 1:25:18Speaker 06

  My shit was always like this.

• 1:25:19Andrew Santino?

  My paper airplane always went this way.

• 1:25:21Speaker 06

  Yeah, my shit was always like.

• 1:25:22Andrew Santino?

  I never got one to go straight.

• 1:25:23Speaker 06

  My shit was always off and I was always like, fuck, I suck! And that was the moment where I was like, this is just what it's gonna be. It's just, you're never gonna have the perfectly folded paper.

• 1:25:30Andrew Santino?

  It's probably why you're a comic, though.

• 1:25:32Speaker 06

  Oh, 100%.

• 1:25:33Andrew Santino?

  Not to sound like a cornball, but

• 1:25:34Speaker 06

  I mean, it's just.

• 1:25:34Andrew Santino?

  Because you can't fold something right means your brain is like, I'm thinking about other stuff.

• 1:25:39Speaker 06

  Yeah, 100%.

• 1:25:40Andrew Santino?

  You know what I mean?

• 1:25:41Speaker 06

  100% where you go like, it'd be funny if, uh, it'd be funny if she had a Scottish accent.

• 1:25:45Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, exactly.

• 1:25:47Speaker 06

  Instead of folding, and you're like, why would you do that?

• 1:25:48Andrew Santino?

  I wish I could make this paper fart. Everyone's like, Dan?

• 1:25:51Speaker 06

  What if this paper smelled like farts? And you go, eh.

• 1:25:53Andrew Santino?

  And then I could fly past you and everyone smell a fart.

• 1:25:56Speaker 06

  Don't think about that! It actually would be like, by the way, I'm thinking about that, what a great idea.

• 1:26:02Andrew Santino?

  I just thought about it.

• 1:26:04Speaker 06

  That would actually be an assault weapon, like in, yeah, and then they'd be like, oh.

• 1:26:09Andrew Santino?

  What the fuck, dude?

• 1:26:10Speaker 06

  For those with proper smell.

• 1:26:11Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:26:12Speaker 06

  I am handicapped.

• 1:26:13Andrew Santino?

  Sorry about that. Sorry about your disability.

• 1:26:15Speaker 06

  Yeah, know your, my privilege.

• 1:26:16Andrew Santino?

  Know your friend's disability.

• 1:26:18Speaker 06

  Before you talk shit, know your friend's disabilities.

• 1:26:20Andrew Santino?

  Daniel, Daniel Soder.

• 1:26:22Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:26:23Andrew Santino?

  Uh, I love you. I want to say thank you for coming on the show again. I always love having you on. You're the fucking man.

• 1:26:28Speaker 06

  You're the, anytime I come to Los Angeles, the first text is to you.

• 1:26:31Andrew Santino?

  I love you, dude.

• 1:26:32Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:26:32Andrew Santino?

  And I'm gonna see the store tonight, or no? Yeah, you're there tonight?

• 1:26:35Speaker 06

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:26:35Andrew Santino?

  Two shows?

• 1:26:36Speaker 06

  Just the ten, I'm on the nine o'clock.

• 1:26:38Andrew Santino?

  Okay. Are you running an hour or no?

• 1:26:39Speaker 06

  No, I'm just doing like ten fifteen.

• 1:26:41Andrew Santino?

  Okay, okay, I thought you were doing a show show.

• 1:26:43Speaker 06

  I've never done a spot in the OR.

• 1:26:45Andrew Santino?

  Tonight's your first time?

• 1:26:45Speaker 06

  Yeah, I've only been in the main room.

• 1:26:47Andrew Santino?

  Buddy, you're gonna fucking love it.

• 1:26:49Speaker 06

  So I gotta bring someone up, right?

• 1:26:50Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, we shotgun.

• 1:26:52Speaker 06

  Fuck.

• 1:26:52Andrew Santino?

  Which is my favorite. I'll say why. I.

• 1:26:56Speaker 06

  What if I fuck their name up?

• 1:26:57Andrew Santino?

  It doesn't matter. And you literally won't because you'll know who it is. And you know before. You won't.

• 1:27:01Speaker 06

  I feel like I'm at a different school and I'm having lunch.

• 1:27:03Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you are. And we're like, what are you doing, dude? Is that a spork? Did you bring a spork?

• 1:27:09Speaker 06

  In New York, it's really cool.

• 1:27:13Speaker 06

  But what are you saying with?

• 1:27:14Andrew Santino?

  No, I like, I like shotgunning out here better than having a host because a host sometimes, sometimes hosts are great, but they break it up in a way where it's like, I like it that you can personalize it and it brings that, it almost ushers them into the party. It's as if your buddy who's coming over to your house and no one really knows him and you're like, oh dude, oh guys, guys, this is Kevin.

• 1:27:33Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:27:33Andrew Santino?

  He's da, da, da. And then everyone is like, oh, hey Kevin, instead of just like someone else dropping off Kevin being like, Kevin's here.

• 1:27:39Speaker 06

  Yeah, that's so funny.

• 1:27:41Andrew Santino?

  And then everyone's like, what the fuck is, who's that?

• 1:27:43Speaker 06

  Guys, I want to introduce my friend.

• 1:27:45Andrew Santino?

  It's just, it's hard.

• 1:27:46Speaker 06

  I'm interested, I'm, I'm very excited. I'm very nervous. It's intimidating.

• 1:27:48Andrew Santino?

  No, it's not at all. It's exactly how we always feel when we do the cellar, but the moment that you get there, you're like, ah.

• 1:27:54Speaker 06

  Yeah, I'm very excited. Well, I'm staying at the hotel next store.

• 1:27:56Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:27:57Speaker 06

  So I just, I'm like, I'll come down in my robe.

• 1:28:00Andrew Santino?

  Don't do that, dude.

• 1:28:01Speaker 06

  Just show up. He go, dude, Soder like flashes.

• 1:28:04Andrew Santino?

  Tomorrow, I get a call, someone's like, you hear what happened to Soder?

• 1:28:06Speaker 06

  He can't get in a robe?

• 1:28:07Andrew Santino?

  He's just flashing everybody on Sunset.

• 1:28:09Speaker 06

  I was, I was on Billions. I was on Billions.

• 1:28:12Andrew Santino?

  I was on Billions.

• 1:28:13Speaker 06

  He's just wagging my dick at people.

• 1:28:15Andrew Santino?

  That says you're getting arrested. I was on fucking Billions.

• 1:28:17Speaker 06

  Oh, I'm back in. Spy, sell.

• 1:28:20Andrew Santino?

  I don't talk to anybody on that cast anymore, but I was on Billions.

• 1:28:22Speaker 06

  Damn, most of them have forgotten me. Buy, sell. Buy, sell. I love you.

• 1:28:27Andrew Santino?

  I love you. Go see Soder. Go to dan soder dot com. Go see him on the road. He's announcing a bunch of new dates. They will be up by the time this is out.

• 1:28:35Speaker 06

  Yes.

• 1:28:36Andrew Santino?

  Because we can't talk about it.

• 1:28:36Speaker 06

  Yes.

• 1:28:37Andrew Santino?

  But go to dan soder dot com. We end the show the same way. Look in that camera. One word or one phrase whenever you're ready.

• 1:28:42Speaker 06

  Spork.

• 1:28:43Speaker 01

  In here, we pour whiskey, whiskey, whiskey, whiskey, whiskey.

• 1:28:49Speaker 03

  Who's that creature in the ginger beard? Sturdy and ginger. Like vampires, the ginger gene is a curse.

• 1:28:55Speaker 04

  Gingers are beautiful. You owe me $5 for the whiskey, $75 for the horse. Gingers? Oh, hell no.

• 1:29:01Speaker 02

  This whiskey is excellent. Ginger. I like gingers.