Pod Insights The Psychology of your 20s 280. Is it anxiety or intuition? About this episode Intuition is this deep sense of knowing that guides and expands our lives. Anxiety on the other hand restricts us by keeping us beholden to fear. Despite their differences, they can feel remarkably the same, especially if you are someone who has an anxious, overthinking disposition. In today’s episode, we break down how to tell them apart, including:
Where anxiety sits in the body How to spot an anxious thought The origin and science of intuition How intuition should feel Why they feel similar My 6 question checklist for telling them apart How to strengthen your connection with your intuition Plus personal stories of being saved by a gut instinct and our listener questions! Listen now!
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2:48 Jemma Sbeg? I've been approaching my health really differently this year. I used to be really focused on maximizing and doing more. And now I'm just realizing that if I listen to what my body needs, I perform way better. And that's why I am obsessed with my Whoop. Truly, you guys, you know, I'm such a data and information driven person. And I love opening my Whoop app and seeing how my sleep, my stress, my strain is correlating with my mood, with my running performance, with how I'm just feeling day to day. I'm not an elite athlete by any means, but I do really benefit. And I also just really enjoy knowing more about my body. And Whoop also gives me these actionable personalized insights that have made me more intentional
3:33 Jemma Sbeg? and meant that I make smarter decisions day to day about what I need, rather than just putting my foot on the gas and just going, going, going, going. New members can try Whoop with a 30 day free trial before committing to a membership. That's join.whoop.com/psychology for your free month of Whoop. Hello, everybody. Welcome back to the show. Welcome back to the podcast, new listeners, old listeners, wherever you are in the world. It is so great to have you here back for another episode as we, of course, break down the psychology of our twenties. How many times have you heard the phrase, just trust your gut, go with your instinct? Or when you know, you just know.
4:16 Jemma Sbeg? When we hear those phrases in response to a situation where we really just need advice, we're feeling uncertain, it can make the situation feel even more confusing. Especially if you are someone who is naturally anxious, because feelings of anxiety and a gut instinct often feel completely similar and are incredibly hard to differentiate. Self doubt, intuition, generalized anxiety, even excitement, they all feel the same. They all operate on the same axis. So how can we ensure that we are making the right choices, that we are choosing the right path,
4:56 Jemma Sbeg? questioning the right things, when we can't always tell what to focus on and what to ignore? Well, today, that is exactly what we are talking about. We are going to talk about how to distinguish between intuition and anxiety. And let me tell you, I think it is so important to have this conversation in our twenties, because there are so many big life decisions to be made during this decade, and so much insecurity and doubt in general. And if we let ourselves be led by fear, thinking that an emotion that powerful must be a sign, fear must be a sign, I don't think that we give ourselves the lives that we want.
5:38 Jemma Sbeg? And fear in these situations, or anxiety, cannot be the master of our fate, or the master of our destiny, or whatever you want to call it. Knowing the difference between my gut instinct and my fear, it has been a process of trial and error for me. I used to be such a back and forth kind of person. Um, I would constantly need other people's input. I would take a leap of faith, and then I would back down because I began to doubt my own instincts. But around three years ago, I think I experienced just this huge mental shift in general, across all areas of my life. And around that time, I basically decided that for three months,
6:23 Jemma Sbeg? I was just going to go with whatever thing I had decided to do first. So whether it was what restaurant to pick, what movie to watch, what person to date. I had to be decisive and I had to base it on my first thought and my first decision. And I definitely got things wrong during that period, but I think I came out of it with such a strong inner voice. And there have been so many times where I have really not trusted my inner voice and been disappointed. And every single time I have been, it's almost been reaffirming to me when, like what that sounds like. When it's an instinct, when it's my intuition and it's so loudly calling me and I ignore it, it feels terrible.
7:08 Jemma Sbeg? But it also just helps me again reinforce what that voice means to me and when to listen to it. Now, don't get me wrong, I still experience anxiety when it comes to my decisions. But I think I can now really sit back and appreciate it and have a conversation with my anxiety almost, rather than allowing it to dictate what I do in life. When we confuse intuition and anxiety, I think a lot of things can happen. We can become very obsessive over particular thoughts that are unhelpful. Because we think they mean more than they do, when really they are just thoughts. We can make decisions because we're panicked that actually end up being ones that we regret.
7:53 Jemma Sbeg? We leave someone we shouldn't, we turn away from an opportunity we shouldn't, we quit when we shouldn't. Or we don't make decisions that we need to make because we think our anxiety is trying to tell us something. When really, if you think about it, it's just trying to keep us small and it's also trying to keep us safe in a way. These are the mistakes that I want us to make less of. And the thing I'm most excited for in this episode is this questionnaire slash checklist that I have that I use for myself for judging whether a thought I'm having is an anxious thought or an intuitive guide or an intuitive signal.
8:35 Jemma Sbeg? And it's literally one that you could take, you can bring any question, any thought you're having. And you could apply it and put it through this framework and you would have your answer. Is this a thought I should listen to? Is it coming from an anxious place? Or an intuitive place? I also want to talk about how intuition and anxiety feel in our bodies and in our minds. Why they're similar, how they're different, when to know the difference. And more, most importantly, I think, how to truly strengthen our intuition. How to make sure that it is a voice that we hear over the voices of our fear, but also over the voices of a lot of other people who have opinions about our lives as they always will. So there was definitely a time that I needed this episode myself.
9:19 Jemma Sbeg? Maybe I still need it, but now I get the chance to make it for you all. So I hope you learned something. I hope it makes you recognize something about yourself. I hope it quells some of your anxiety. So without further ado, let's talk about the distinction between intuition and anxiety and how to tell the difference.
9:42 Jemma Sbeg? So let's begin by breaking down how each of these feelings, sensations, how they each work. What is anxiety based in and what is intuition based in? We're going to start with the louder and more persistent or arrogant of the two. We're going to start with anxiety. Anxiety, put simply, is our means to survive. It is the alarm system that is meant to protect us against danger by triggering our fight or flight system. Nowadays, this has also been adapted to include fawn and freeze. Basically, anxiety is the first responder. And they see the incoming danger and they call back to the rest of the body and say, are we going to run? Are we going to fight? Are we going to stay still?
10:27 Jemma Sbeg? Are we going to make friends? Sometimes, I think we often villainize anxiety because, you know, it is pretty terrible for it to be this constant voice in our head. But it actually is really essential and it does allow us to see our surroundings properly. It does allow us to be safe. It is an essential part of who we are. When it becomes a problem though, is when it starts getting fanatical. And making up stranger and stranger scenarios that aren't actually happening. But convincing us that either they will happen, or they are happening. So this is known as a distorted anxiety response.
11:12 Jemma Sbeg? Now, there is a way we should experience anxiety. Anxiety can be situation or event based. It can be limited, both in terms of intensity and frequency. It is important for our protection. And then there is a way that becomes unsustainable and mentally harmful. And that is when anxiety becomes constant, we are unable to switch off. And it emerges even when nothing is wrong. So if you've ever been sitting on the couch. And you're sitting there and your whole life genuinely feels perfect in that moment. There is nothing scary happening around you. And yet, you're sitting there, almost being like, something's wrong. Something's wrong, I can feel it, I know it.
11:56 Jemma Sbeg? You feel uncertain, you feel scared. And you cannot release that feeling. That is distorted anxiety. And it basically turns us into a bunch of conspiracy theorists. We may, you know, look at a relationship that seems perfectly normal and think, oh my god, they're gonna break up with me. Even though there are no signs of that. Or we think that person is so mad at me. Or I'm gonna lose my job. Some big disaster is about to happen, the worst case scenario is about to happen. Even when we have no single piece of evidence for those thoughts or scenarios. We end up spiraling, we end up feeling very panicked, there is this desire to do something.
12:40 Jemma Sbeg? This desire to act, this sense of uneasiness. We also start to think that this feeling, because it is so significant. It must mean something. Because it is so loud, it is so hard to dismiss. And the thing is, is that your anxiety is meant to be loud. Anxiety is not meant to be quiet. Our, it was basically made, it was evolved. So that it was hard to ignore because we needed to listen to it for it to be useful because it was meant to tell us something important. But because it is so intense, it feels like everything that it is telling us must be coming true. And it will come true and we need to be prepared.
13:26 Jemma Sbeg? And we better be listening to every single tiny piece of thing it tells us, even when it's a lie. Now, here's the thing about anxiety that, um, I was talking to a friend about this the other day. Which is that even, uh, like the saying goes that even a wrong clock is right twice a day. So your anxiety is ninety nine percent of the time going to be wrong about a situation or a scenario you're in. And then almost by accident, sometimes it will be right. And those are the moments we need to watch out for because we begin to take it as evidence, even though they are so, so rare. We take it as evidence that these feelings we have, which is just simply an overreactive limbic system.
14:06 Jemma Sbeg? And our brain trying to interpret the environment, we take it um, as a sign. And then other times, our anxiety actually creates a self fulfilling prophecy, which is one of the reasons we confuse it with intuition. So. I'm gonna use the example again of you think that a friend is mad at you. You think that's your intuition. It's actually just your anxiety, but because you believe that they are mad at you, it begins to inform your behavior. So you become distant, you become cold, you begin to ignore them as a protective mechanism. And suddenly there is a problem. And you're sitting there going, I told you so. Look, my anxiety was right. It was actually intuition. When really, what was happening was this irrational feeling has created this behavior in you subconsciously.
14:54 Jemma Sbeg? So about thirty percent of us are going to experience an anxiety disorder in our lives. And like the example I just gave, it does shape our behaviors, our actions and our thoughts. It is such a good liar. Our anxiety is such a good liar, but it's also the part of us that is so vulnerable and genuinely afraid. I always think about anxiety as like a parent who tries to shelter their child from the world and tells their child lies, like, you know, the sun is poisonous or other people are evil or these people are the embodiment of Satan. Like, you know, when you watch those weird cult documentaries and
15:35 Jemma Sbeg? the parent, like Carrie, for example, like the parent has told them something about themselves, not because they hate them, but to protect them because of their own trauma. That's literally how I think about anxiety. This actually brings up an important point, which is the relationship between anxiety and trauma, because we cannot talk about anxiety and the confusion between anxiety and intuition without talking about trauma. So a meta-analysis from two thousand and twenty four, it looked at over a thousand studies and papers written on this topic. Within these papers, there were almost twenty five thousand combined participants, and it found that PTSD makes us more anxiety sensitive.
16:20 Jemma Sbeg? Our anxiety response is deeply informed by our past and the things that have caused us extreme pain and hurt. And trauma is just going to scramble the parts of our brain that can think rationally about something, because if you've been through something really terrible, be it relationship trauma, family trauma, childhood trauma, even like a natural disaster, anything like that. Um, basically, that has almost rewired how your brain sees threats and how it sees information. Because you survived that, your brain is now almost locked in on those memories and believes that those memories are useful.
17:02 Jemma Sbeg? So the things that you saw right before, I don't know, the boat sunk or right before the relationship exploded, your brain has still got those in storage and is going to bring them out and use them as almost like a tester for what. You know, that experience would look like in the future. How do we avoid it essentially? I feel like that just, I just rambled there and that maybe didn't make any sense. I just like to give the example of being afraid of flying, right? And having experienced a traumatic flying event. That has happened to me. I had a really traumatic flight once. Um, it was just, I'm not even going to go into details, but it was just so awful. It was so awful. People were crying, people were screaming. It was genuinely traumatic.
17:46 Jemma Sbeg? It may have not led to PTSD, but what it did lead to was a heightened anxiety response in relation to flying. And because I went through that, my brain is now so hyper aware of how scary that felt that anytime I get on a plane, I'm thinking, oh my God, this twinge in my stomach, that's a sign because I felt anxious when I thought the plane was crashing. And so this new feeling must be like the same feeling that is actually just a natural response to an unknown must be telling me something. This is all to say, obviously anxiety is going to feel a lot like a sign sometimes because it is loud, because it is sometimes linked to very emotional heightened situations
18:28 Jemma Sbeg? and because it's fear based and we are naturally prone to listen to fear. Okay, now we really need to discuss intuition. If you want to hear like a full debrief on anxiety, you can listen to, I think it's episode thirty one on the anxious mind. But now it's important to distinguish between anxiety and intuition here. Intuition is something that is sometimes lumped in with a bunch of other concepts. Our paranoia, cognitive biases, emotional thinking, anxiety, of course, a gut instinct, our inner voice, whatever you want to call it, whatever people confuse it as. Basically intuition describes the way that we can just sense that something is not quite
19:10 Jemma Sbeg? right without needing rational proof in that moment. It is this strange ability to pick up on cues from another person or our environment or from our senses that is telling us something that might not be something we can admit to ourselves or we can say out loud, but we can feel it. So I found this really amazing article that kind of brought, broke down the four types of intuition. So there's clairvoyance, which is kind of almost having visions or seeing images of something that's about to happen. Honestly, quite spiritual, very rare. There's clear sentience, which is like a gut reaction that could include feeling really intense bodily
19:53 Jemma Sbeg? sensations or feelings. There's clear cognizance, which is when you're kind of sitting there and you just feel this like piece of knowledge drop into your head. One example I give is people who say they knew the queen was gonna die the day before she did and it felt like this weird intuitive, oh my god, like mystical thing. And there, then there is clear audience, which is hearing short phrases, voices, sounds that feel like some kind of direct message. Obviously, there's a lot of overlap with that last one with schizophrenia or schizoaffective disorder. Essentially, it's just how you hear your intuition when your intuition is at a
20:34 Jemma Sbeg? normal balanced level. Now, some people are gonna define intuition as a very spiritual or magical phenomenon. And until about 20 years ago, the scientific community would have probably agreed and it would have told you that it was garbage and it was just mystical thinking. But more and more evidence is coming out that points to the fact that our gut instinct and our intuition has a very strong scientific basis. And it does occur on almost a cellular level, on a social level, a physical level, and a collective level as well. I personally have a deep belief in intuition, if that is not obvious. I'm gonna tell you about this
21:13 Jemma Sbeg? crazy story that actually happened to me that felt like intuition at work and probably even saved my life. So around five years ago, I was living in Canberra and it was around eleven P M at night, almost twelve, and me and my boyfriend at the time decided to go and get McDonald's, like a drive through McDonald's. Um, I don't know why, I think we just were like, we'd watched a movie, we were still awake. We really felt like, I'm like, all right, honestly, that's just a silly detail, you don't need to know that. We go through this drive through, we pull out and we pull into this like four way intersection with two lanes going either way. We pull up to the light, there are no other cars around, we're listening to music
21:58 Jemma Sbeg? and the light for me to turn right at this intersection goes green. And I'm sitting there and I just don't go forward. And my boyfriend at the time looks at me and goes, what are you doing? Like, why aren't you moving? And I kind of just looked at him and was like, oh, I don't know. Right at that point, I turned back to the road and I went to go forward. And at that very moment, this car going probably around a hundred kilometers an hour, ran the red light and would have completely hit us. It would have hit us and it probably would have killed us. And right behind it, these three to four cop cars pull onto the road and are chasing it.
22:44 Jemma Sbeg? And we are just sitting in the car and I'm just like, ho- holy crap. If I had pulled out onto that road, we would have died. We would have died. This car would have hit us directly where him and I were sitting and it would have just been the end. And that's, like, we, we literally pulled over and we're just like in shock. Like, I cannot even explain that feeling of just being like, wow. And later that, then we called our friend, I don't even know what happened. I think we like texted our friends and we're like, you're not gonna believe what just happened. And they go on the news and they go onto like our local news page in Canberra. And there's a car that has been like in pursuit by the police.
23:29 Jemma Sbeg? And an hour later, like, it's been, basically, it's a high speed chase. And.
23:37 Jemma Sbeg? I don't know what it was in that moment when, you know, I'm in the car listening to music and the light turns green and I see it turn green and I did not go. And some part of me says that was just intuition. The thing is, I'm quite a scientific person. I love the science, I love the evidence. And for a while, I was really trying to find an answer because how do we explain moments like that? We've all had a moment like that. There are a few theories as to what causes this intuition that stops us or tells us to go or is like a calling. The first explanation is obviously one of fate and destiny and mysticism and a higher power
24:19 Jemma Sbeg? controlling everything, call it God, the universe, Allah, some power is moving all these parts. Now, this one's hard to prove, obviously, because it's hard to prove the existence of something you can't see and that doesn't have a scientific measure to it, but that's one take on it. The psychology, though, says two things. Intuition is this emotionally charged, rapid, unconscious process whereby our brain is basically using information that we've never acknowledged or seen before to influence our actions. So basically, when we look at the world, our brain is really good at just selecting what is important to us because we do have finite cognitive resources.
25:02 Jemma Sbeg? It cannot process every single little thing in our environment at once and give all that information to us to consciously process. All that information, though, it still exists and it's still being processed. You may not consciously have noticed the car speeding down towards you, but part of your brain did and told you to stop. You may not have consciously seen the suspicious shadow in the alleyway. Some part of your brain did and it kind of cut over all the noise and said, don't go down there, don't go forward, don't do that thing. That's the first explanation, basically your unconscious mind noticing things quicker than you, faster than you, silently.
25:47 Jemma Sbeg? The second explanation is based on learning and how our brain really predicts things based on past experience and. Yeah, basically it learns from what we've been through before. So this is the theory that was put forward by the neuroscientist Joel Pearson. He runs a lab on neuroscience and intuition called Future Mind Labs at UNSW here in Sydney. And I'm going to explain this explanation the way he does, which is using a coffee shop. So you run a new coffee shop, you're, let's say you're walking around London, you're walking around Brazil, you're walking around Tokyo, some city. You've never been before and you want to get a coffee, you want to get some lunch. Now, you've been to heaps of cafes before.
26:29 Jemma Sbeg? And when you were in those environments, your brain processed all of these pieces of information, the temperature, the music. The coffee machine, how clean the floor was, the decor, how warm it was. And you've just basically learned what parts of an atmosphere or an, or an environment are going to predict. The kind of food and experience and coffee that you want, based on all these prior learnings. So as you're looking for a cafe, you're standing in the entrance, your intuition is applying those learnings to. All this conscious information that's happening right now to help you make a decision based on a gut feeling. This is why you might have a gut instinct about a bad friend. Or that someone is lying to you.
27:13 Jemma Sbeg? It's because you've probably encountered a situation before. And although you may not have picked up on some of the information that came with this situation. Part of your brain did, and now it's pulling that information out of storage to help you make the best decision in this moment now. There is another component of intuition. And it's talked about a lot less and it's this kind of ancient kind of knowledge. Knowledge passed down through generations that feels like it's in our DNA, even, even in our cells. Like you may not have encountered a situation before, but there is some human part of you that feels very familiar with it. And knows how to act and some kind of deja vu.
27:57 Jemma Sbeg? I honestly think it's because there's some ancestor, some experience from your past that it's in your blood, it's in your bones, it's been passed down through you. You can call it spirit, you can call it whatever. I know this sounds very woo woo. It's an ancient human knowledge that informs how you see the world and informs your intuition and your gut instinct. I want to tell another story, this time about my mum. When she was my age, she was travelling around the world, doing fun, fabulous things. And she was in Indonesia, she was on a mountain that she knew was an active volcano. And it hadn't exploded for a while, I think it was semi dormant. She's walking up this volcano, doing this hike.
28:41 Jemma Sbeg? And she just gets this sense that this is going to erupt, something's not right. And she runs down the mountain, she sprints down the mountain and it erupts. Like, I don't know if it was the day later, it was after she got down the mountain. But within a very short period of time, the volcano had erupted. And from what I can remember of this story, no one was there with her, no one had told her. She just had this very human sense. And it was almost like some ancestor, some human person in her past had encountered this and there was a knowledge there that was passed on.
29:25 Jemma Sbeg? And I remember her telling me, she felt like she needed to move and she needed to hustle. But she didn't feel anxious about the thought. She didn't feel like there was anything to do other than to act, she was very certain. And I think this is what intuition feels like. It feels very calm and self assured, there is no doubt. There is not a thousand possible outcomes or explanations running through your head. The way that that, you know, that's sometimes what happens with anxiety. You're sitting there, oh, like this could happen, or this could happen, or this could happen. It's serving you up a thousand different possibilities.
30:07 Jemma Sbeg? With intuition, that's not, that's not the case. There's one explanation, one prediction. You feel it in your body. It is stable. It is certain. It is confident. Most people also obviously say you can feel it in your stomach. That's the term gut instinct. That's where it comes from. Now, the science behind this sensation is very, very cool. Scientists don't call the stomach the second brain for no reason. There's very good reason because there is a vast neural network of over a hundred million neurons lining your entire digestive system. And every single year, more and more evidence emerges that there is this bidirectional communication pathway between the brain and the gut.
30:50 Jemma Sbeg? In other words, you might feel your emotions or certain sensations in your stomach before you consciously process them. They're known by another name. They're called gut signals. And a twenty twenty paper looked at whether they could be trusted. And it did find that emotional stress and cues have an immediate impact on the gut in a way that we may be quicker to recognize than a passing thought or than any other kind of sensory information. That's what the gut instinct is. As to whether we can trust our intuition, I can't go into all the studies because there are so, so many. And the answer is, it really depends. It really depends.
31:35 Jemma Sbeg? But by and large, we do need this part of ourselves, this unconscious intelligence. A two thousand and six study that I read that looked at this found that people were better able to make a decision.
31:51 Jemma Sbeg? Under like chaotic circumstances when they went with what they initially thought, rather than those situations where they had time to really think about it, especially when we have more options. So if we're thinking about intuition and a big life choice, especially one in our twenties, if you just applied reason and rationality to however many choices you have, you would not make a good decision because you would get too caught up in the data. There are certain moments like that one where you have to just trust what is being fed to you, what information that you may not be able to label is being told to you that is helping you make a choice. I also think, you know, human emotion and to some extent, human relationships
32:35 Jemma Sbeg? aren't always properly represented in rational thought. There are things about human relationships that cannot be presented in facts or figures or pro cons lists. And so listening out for that emotional directive that you are being given and whatever direction you're being called to is really, really important. Otherwise you end up confused, robotic, almost mathematical at times. The question now is, how do we tap into that inner voice when sometimes it does just feel like anxiety? We spend a lot of time talking about both of those things. Let's put it together after this very short break.
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34:17 Jemma Sbeg? Something that really frustrates me is when wellness brands greenwash their products to make them seem more clean or better for the environment when they are actually not. When you look into it, they are kind of just like the rest of them. Nature's Sunshine, however, doesn't just talk about the planet. They do something about it. They sustainably source ingredients. They craft their supplements with 100% solar powered manufacturing and their products are incredible. I don't drink coffee and so Nature's Sunshine Brain Edge gives me that kick I sometimes need with potent ingredients combining yerba mate with nootropics, adaptogens, botanicals to support mental clarity and focus. And you already know how much I love their marine glow and have for years.
35:02 Jemma Sbeg? It is the only collagen that combines skin supporting marine collagen with the sun and blue light protection of luton to make your skin feel and look glowy and protected. Plus, I just really like that they have nature at the core of everything that they do. Try Nature's Sunshine and experience the difference with supplements that are better for you and the planet. Go to naturessunshine.com today and use the code PSYCH for 20% off your first order plus free shipping. That's code PSYCH for 20% off your first order at naturessunshine.com.
35:37 Jemma Sbeg? Who out here shops at CVS? Most of you, right? Well, if you're not signed up for extra care, you need to fix that because when you are, you get extra big deals. These are limited time offers you can find in store or in the app and it's where being an extra care member pays off. So sign up now. If you're already shopping there, it's a no brainer. If you're not, well, you need to do something about that as well. Signing up couldn't be easier and once you've joined, the exclusive member discounts instantly appear. You don't have to do anything, no coupons. You'll just enjoy savings on the items you buy most. We're talking about savings on essentials like household items, snacks, health, personal care products, plus travel and seasonal stuff too. All right there in store, couldn't be easier.
36:22 Jemma Sbeg? Deals refresh every two weeks, so there's always something new, but they don't last long. Extra big deals with extra care. Instant savings made simple. Head to your local CVS or open the CVS app, look for extra big deals and start saving today. I've been approaching my health really differently this year. I used to be really focused on maximizing and doing more. And now I'm just realizing that if I listen to what my body needs, I perform way better. And that's why I am obsessed with my Whoop. Truly, you guys, you know, I'm such a data and information driven person. And I love opening my Whoop app and seeing how my sleep, my stress, my strain is correlating with my mood,
37:06 Jemma Sbeg? with my running performance, with how I'm just feeling day to day. I'm not an elite athlete by any means, but I do really benefit. And I also just really enjoy knowing more about my body. And Whoop also gives me these actionable personalized insights that have made me more intentional and meant that I make smarter decisions day to day about what I need, rather than just putting my foot on the gas and just going, going, going, going. New members can try Whoop with a 30 day free trial before committing to a membership. That's join.whoop.com/psychology for your free month of Whoop. This episode is sponsored by Gymshark. Gymshark has spent over 14 years obsessing over gym clothing and the people who wear it.
37:51 Jemma Sbeg? And let me just say, I think we all know they are very, very good at what they do. No, seriously, their stuff is so good. Their everyday seamless collection is light, it's soft, it's stretchy. All of their stuff just looks good on and it's made for people who love to exercise, whatever exercise that is, lifting, cardio, Pilates, running around campus, maybe just doing errands. Discover Gymshark and find your new favorite gym clothing at gymshark.com.
38:21 Jemma Sbeg? So knowing what we know now, why do we confuse intuition and anxiety? Well, we often confuse them because they feel the same and they elicit very similar thoughts and sensations. In particular, if you are someone who is already anxious, you are going to be hypervigilant to even the smallest cues or signs of danger or signs that you should or shouldn't be doing something. And so your brain is going to naturally apply a deeper meaning to things that sometimes is just fear, sometimes it's just catastrophic thinking, sometimes it's just worry. And we confuse those sensations for an intuitive thought. Here are some of the other reasons that we tend to get them confused.
39:02 Jemma Sbeg? I think to start off with, they both often occur in response to uncertain situations. And so with both intuition and anxiety, they often are going to come up when there is some kind of unknown. And that's something we never enjoy as humans. And because in that situation, we're already stressed, it can be hard to tell the difference. They can both often feel a little bit irrational, like, I don't know why I feel this way, I just do. In terms of anxiety, the reason you just feel this way is because your mind is, I don't know, just on high alert and dysregulated in terms of how you're processing fear.
39:42 Jemma Sbeg? In terms of intuition, sometimes it's because you're just seeing something that your brain isn't consciously knowing is there. They also both originate from within us, even if it's different corners of the mind. If anxiety was all situation based, or was just what someone else had to say, it would be very easy to discredit it. But because both of them, intuition and anxiety, are coming through some of the same channels, they can get kind of confused. They also, like I said, elicit some of the same physical sensations, specifically that gut signal or sensation for anxiety, that can feel like nausea, sometimes that feels the same as a gut instinct, so it's easily confused.
40:27 Jemma Sbeg? They both also feel important to listen to. So as much as we kind of hate an anxious feeling, it is an important feeling and it's very hard for our brain to ignore it. The same with intuition, it's there, they're loud, and often they are directed towards something that feels emotionally salient to us. We're not going to feel intuitive or anxious about what bag to take to the gym or what pen to use. We're going to feel anxious and intuitive about very profound, big things like finances, relationships, life choices. So they sit in the same ecosystem. And finally, they're both trying to guide us to make a certain decision.
41:08 Jemma Sbeg? Intuition wants us to make a good decision, anxiety wants us to make the decision that keeps us safe. Either way, they're both working on our brain to kind of give it the best argument as to what path to take. We've talked about how they're similar, how do they differ? This is the real thing we want to know. Well, where anxiety is urgent and rushed, and it will always make you feel like you need to do something immediately, like a bad boss with a bad way of time management. Intuition is gonna let you take your time. Intuition will not push you. It will not rush you towards a decision, even if it's an important choice. Intuition, I've found, also feels remarkably calm.
41:54 Jemma Sbeg? It's like this steady feeling in your whole body. This like real sense of like, yeah, this is what I need to do. And sometimes you even are just like, I can't explain it. I just know, and it's not scary, it's just knowledge. On the other hand, anxiety tends to be very uncomfortable. There's a lot of restlessness. There's a lot of jitteriness. It's movement, it's chaos, it's energy. Like we said before, this is also an important distinction. Intuition is singular, anxiety is plural. Intuition will often give you one answer, one scenario, one hypothetical, whereas anxiety will give you several.
42:36 Jemma Sbeg? Intuition is also present focused, it's based on what is happening now, whilst anxiety is focused on the future and it's very obsessive. And it's based in fear, whereas intuition is based in freedom. I think the best way I can describe the difference is that we often confuse anxiety as intuition all the time, but very rarely the other way around. We never think that intuition is just anxiety, because intuition is so absolutely sure of itself, and there's often no fear. I know this feels rather abstract, so I thought I'd give you a bit of a checklist. Say you are listening to this episode for a specific situation to you,
43:21 Jemma Sbeg? one I probably don't know. There's something coming up, though. Some part of you is scared, some part of you wants the right answer, some part of you doesn't know which feeling you're having right now to trust and which one to ignore. So I want to give you a checklist for whether the thought you're having is an intuitive thought or an anxious thought. To begin with, does the thought you're having start with what if? If it does, it's an anxious thought. What if this happens? There's no what ifs with intuition. Secondly, how long have you been thinking about this hypothetical? If it's persistent and subtle, that's intuition.
44:02 Jemma Sbeg? If it's just showed up today and it's coming in waves of fear and overthinking, that's anxiety. Does this thought limit or expand you? If it traps you, it's anxiety. Because anxiety really likes to keep things safe by keeping them the same. If it's intuition, it's going to expand you and guide you, even if it feels uncomfortable. And that's why we cannot rely on discomfort alone to tell whether a thought is intuitive or anxious. Now, does this thought push you more towards self-trust? Or does it make you doubt yourself more? Self-trust, intuition, self-doubt, anxiety.
44:46 Jemma Sbeg? Do you feel confident in this decision deep down? Or are you seeking constant reassurance? So are you going to friends, family, Reddit pages? Trying to tell, is this, is this the right decision? Is it not the right decision? If you feel confident deep down, it's intuition. If you're needing reassurance, it's anxiety. If you sit quietly and you breathe and you're all alone and you feel like you're trying to bring yourself peace, does the thought go away? Does it fade when you relax? If that's the case, it's anxiety. If it's still there and it's steady, it's not causing you any harm, it's intuition.
45:29 Jemma Sbeg? This is my checklist and I want you to write these down. Remember that this episode is here for the next time you have a thought that you think is anxious, that you think is misleading, test it against this framework. I think if you're still struggling to delineate between these two emotions, the final way to really tell is that intuition is going to respond positively to action and anxious thought will respond positively to slowing down. So if the thought gets louder, the less you do, you have confused intuition with anxiety. If the thought gets louder, the more you try and change and escape,
46:12 Jemma Sbeg? you've confused anxiety with intuition. That's really, I know I've given you a lot of ways of telling this, but this is really the one. With all that in mind, how do we improve our ability to hear our inner voice and our inner directive and what it wants from us? Matter of fact, how do we also improve our ability to tune out our anxiety and to stop it cutting over the intuitive frequency? The first thing I do when I really want to tap into what I truly want and I'm thinking is that I spend time in solitude. I take a step back from everything. I spend time by myself, particularly in nature. I find that firstly, that calms my anxiety.
46:57 Jemma Sbeg? I always say this, the best way to regulate your nervous system is to put it back into the environment it was made to work in. Your nervous system, your stress response, it was made for the wild. It was made for this so-called natural habitat. That's where it's going to be regulated best. So being outdoors helps with that. It also makes me more focused on what I truly want. So that solitude part is really, really essential. I also think if you're trying to tap into your intuition, spending more time alone. It's not just that it's a cure for anxiety in some way. It's also that it stops you from approval and opinion seeking. So that is often a symptom of someone who is quite anxious and quite obsessive in their thoughts.
47:42 Jemma Sbeg? You're often asking people for their opinion constantly because you can't trust yourself. Being away from that temptation is really helpful. And I think when we are constantly looking for other people's validation of our decisions and what they think, we do cut ourselves off from our self-knowledge because our own thoughts, we start to question them in favor of what someone else thinks. And really, what do they know? Like, what do they know about what you feel? Probably not much. They're applying their own intuition about their life to your circumstances when your circumstances are probably entirely different. And there's this incredible study from twenty twenty three actually conducted in Australia
48:25 Jemma Sbeg? that found those of us who spend more time alone, we are more self-aware and we are more satisfied in terms of autonomy. Autonomy being our ability to make decisions for ourself and believe they are good decisions. Now, I will say, small caveat here. You can't spend more than seventy five percent of your time alone. Another study kind of gave us that figure, also another study from twenty twenty three. So finding that balance between being able to appreciate solitude and isolation in a sense, but also not tip too far over the edge, really important. The other way to strengthen your intuition is to be patient. Don't always look for a sign. Don't rush it.
49:09 Jemma Sbeg? Rushing is an anxious game. That is anxiety's favorite game to play. And it will have you looking for signs where there aren't any, leading you to read too much into small things, leading you to make the wrong decisions. Basically, what I'm trying to say is, don't feel like you need to change everything at once and that every discomfort is a problem. Sometimes discomfort, it is growth. It is okay to sit in a period that feels strange and odd for a little while without feeling like it's indicating a problem. Let me give some examples of this. When you are in a new relationship, especially if you're in a new relationship,
49:55 Jemma Sbeg? where you've previously been in an unhealthy one, sometimes that's going to feel a little bit painful. There are these growing pains in a relationship. It doesn't mean that you should trust that discomfort solely. Another example is in a new job. You know, I always say the first three months of a new job are really, really hard. Doesn't mean it's the wrong decision. What about like moving to a new city? That's another one. You're going to feel uncomfortable when you move to a new city. That discomfort does not mean that you necessarily have made the wrong decision. My rule is always the six month rule. If it's three months for a job, it's six months for a new city.
50:37 Jemma Sbeg? If you still hate it at six months, then you can say, oh, maybe I didn't trust my gut instinct. But yeah, I just think that be patient with choices that you make. Just because they aren't working out right now, doesn't mean that you were wrong. I would also say in the opposite direction, notice patterns in past decisions. So reflect on times when you made the wrong decision. You can arguably say, dang, I really made a wrong decision. Right before you made that decision, in the weeks, days, minutes before you made that decision, was there another decision calling you that you ignored? That was probably your gut instinct. That was probably your intuition.
51:19 Jemma Sbeg? Remember that feeling? Remember it and apply it to the situations you're in now. Do you feel something similar at the moment? And try some trial and error. You know, sometimes the best way to get more in touch with your intuition is to make mistakes that prove to you what your intuition is not.
51:41 Jemma Sbeg? Trial and error sucks, but sometimes if you feel strongly about something, you have to follow through with it, see what happens. And that's going to be the easiest way for you to tell what anxiety feels like for you versus what intuition feels like for you. And if that feels very big and scary, you can start with very small, low stakes risks, just to build confidence in your intuition by making minor intuitive decisions. So trying a new activity, if you feel called to talk to someone on the street, if you feel called to, I don't know, have a connection with someone, do it. It's so low stakes. I feel like it's going to be fine.
52:22 Jemma Sbeg? Those kinds of things are a really great practice routine. They're really good training wheels. Now for managing your anxiety, this is a whole nother ballgame, a whole nother pit of snakes. Like I said, we have an episode on this. I'm going to leave it in the description. It's actually probably a really good episode to listen to right after this one. But rapid fire, how I address my anxiety when I feel like it's taking over. I create a fear versus reality list. What is a fear thought? What is a reality thought? I put them on separate sides. I repeat them to myself so that I can just reaffirm what I do know to be true. Challenge the what if thinking. Ask yourself, what if the best case scenario happened?
53:06 Jemma Sbeg? What's the chances of that happening? No more, no less than the worst case. Talk to other people about the feelings that you're having. I would also say stop drinking. If you're going through a real anxious period and it's interrupting your ability to hear from your intuition, please stop drinking. We know that alcohol spikes anxiety by initially causing a very calming effect through gabber activity in the brain, but then as it wears off, the brain tries to rebalance those neurotransmitters with glutamate, which is a very anxious neurotransmitter slash hormone, causing us to feel more anxious. Please stop drinking. Engage in some kind of movement.
53:49 Jemma Sbeg? If I'm anxious and I'm like, okay, why does, why does my intuition slash anxiety tell me this friend hates me? Why, why do I suddenly believe I'm going to get evicted? Why do I believe this, that, that? I immediately dance, I shake, I sing, I do some kind of movement. To dispel what is a physical reaction for me and also get therapy. Get therapy. People talk about it a lot because it actually works. Surprise, surprise, it's amazing. And so if you really want to tap into your intuition, sometimes you do have to clean out some of the garbage. Sometimes you do have to clean out some of the thought patterns that you have developed over time to protect yourself that actually are hurting you.
54:33 Jemma Sbeg? All right, we're gonna take a short break, but when we return, we've got some listener dilemmas to do with anxiety and intuition. Stay with us.
54:48 Jemma Sbeg? These days, there are more people than ever telling you how to manage your health. And we've all gone down an internet rabbit hole exploring the latest health trends. Your social media feed is packed with wellness advice telling you to cold plunge, protein max, detox, track your sleep. But what's actually real? What's exaggerated? What's just wrong? That's exactly what Health vs. Hype from the American Medical Association and iHeartMedia's Ruby Studio is here to find out. Each episode, Emmy nominated science communicator Trace Dominguez, who's racked up billions of views across PBS, Discovery Channel and YouTube, talks to health influencers, real people, and most importantly, doctors,
55:32 Jemma Sbeg? to separate fact from fiction. Because when it comes to your health, who you listen to matters. Listen to Health vs. Hype on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
55:48 Jemma Sbeg? Something that really frustrates me is when wellness brands greenwash their products to make them seem more clean or better for the environment when they are actually not. When you look into it, they are kind of just like the rest of them. Nature's sunshine, however, doesn't just talk about the planet. They do something about it. They sustainably source ingredients, they craft their supplements with 100% solar powered manufacturing, and their products are incredible. Drink coffee and so nature sunshine brain edge gives me that kick I sometimes need with potent ingredients combining yerba mate with nootropics, adaptogens, botanicals to support mental clarity and focus. And you already know how much I love their marine glow and have for
56:32 Jemma Sbeg? years. It is the only collagen that combines skin supporting marine collagen with the sun and blue light protection of luton to make your skin feel and look glowy and protected. Plus, I just really like that they have nature at the core of everything that they do. Try nature's sunshine and experience the difference with supplements that are better for you and the planet. Go to nature's sunshine.com today and use the code psych for 20% off your first order plus free shipping. That's code psych for 20% off your first order at nature sunshine.com.
57:08 Jemma Sbeg? Who out here shops at CBS? Most of you, right? Well, if you're not signed up for extra care, you need to fix that because when you are, you get extra big deals. These are limited time offers you can find in store or in the app and it's where being an extra care member pays off. So sign up now. If you're already shopping there, it's a no brainer. If you're not, well, you need to do something about that as well. Signing up couldn't be easier. And once you've joined, the exclusive member discounts instantly appear. You don't have to do anything, no coupons, you'll just enjoy savings on the items you buy most. We're talking about savings on essentials like household items, snacks, health, personal care products, plus travel and seasonal stuff
57:50 Jemma Sbeg? too. All right there in store. Couldn't be easier. Deals refresh every two weeks. So there's always something new, but they don't last long. Extra big deals with extra care. Instant savings made simple. Head to your local CBS or open the CBS app, look for extra big deals and start saving today.
58:11 Jemma Sbeg? I've been really trying to prioritize my health in a realistic way this year. And something that has kept me really motivated is my Whoop. I am such a data person, which is why I love Whoop. Because I can genuinely see why my body feels differently depending on the day. Why I'm running differently, why I'm maybe less focused. Whoop effortlessly tracks my sleep, it tracks my strain, my recovery, my stress. And most importantly, my overall health. And it just gives me all that data and all those patterns. So I can make better decisions, which includes knowing when to go easy and knowing when to go hard. New members can try Whoop with a 30 day free trial before committing to a membership. That's join.whoop.com/psychology for your free month of Whoop.
58:55 Jemma Sbeg? This episode is sponsored by Gymshark. Gymshark has spent over 14 years obsessing over gym clothing and the people who wear it. And let me just say, I think we all know they are very, very good at what they do. No, seriously, their stuff is so good. Their everyday seamless collection is light, it's soft, it's stretchy. All of their stuff just looks good on and it's made for people who love to exercise. Whatever exercise that is, lifting cardio, Pilates, running around campus, maybe just doing errands. Discover Gymshark and find your new favorite gym clothing at gymshark.com.
59:33 Jemma Sbeg? So my lovely listeners, if you are a loyal listener of the show, you have been here for a while. You will know that this is a relatively new segment of the podcast. I'm just trialing it out for the next couple of episodes. I'm always down for your feedback, but so many of you would have questions after the episode had gone up. And I wish that I could have answered those questions in the actual episode. So now I'm giving you all the opportunity to ask me those specific questions, dilemmas that you are having before the episode airs, so I can answer them for you. If you want to submit a question for an upcoming topic, just make sure you're following me at that psychology podcast.
1:00:13 Jemma Sbeg? We've got some really cool episodes coming up around confidence, around being a late bloomer, around parasocial relations. I will be asking for your questions and your dilemmas. If you hate this segment, please actually let me know. I really wanna hear it. Because if you guys don't like it, it's going, it's going, it's going, it's gone. But I wanna answer some of the questions that a lot of you kindly submitted today. Let's talk about this first question. Is there any such thing or any time when being led by anxiety is a good thing? The answer is yes. So anxiety causes distress and eustress. Eustress is spelled E U S T R E S. It's also known as good stress.
1:00:58 Jemma Sbeg? And it helps boost a lot of really great things, specifically our motivation and our focus. So there's this law called the Jörg Dodson Law. And basically, it says that anxiety up to a point actually helps improve our performance. Um, moderate levels of anxiety, of course, will help you better with studying. They help people with deadlines, but it's when we get to an excessive point that it really starts to kind of hurt us. So essentially, it's an important balance to have. Anxiety also helps indicate when something requires our attention.
1:01:41 Jemma Sbeg? I know there are a lot of like posts on TikTok and Instagram being like, how how I got rid of my anxiety. I cured my anxiety with exercise. I no longer feel anxious. That's probably not a good thing. You do need anxiety sometimes. Otherwise, you would be just in a constant state of complete calm and normalcy. And even when stressful things happened, you wouldn't respond to them. It's important to feel that way. Like, think about your wedding day or like some really important event where you feel a deep emotional sensation in response to it. You feel nervous, you feel scared, you feel excited. All of that is possible because of anxiety. So yes, there is some level that is important. Question number two.
1:02:26 Jemma Sbeg? My gut says to leave my boyfriend, but my anxious self wonders if it's just self sabotage. This is just one person's question, but the amount of times I got something very similar in my DMs was incredible. It's something that a lot of you are obviously quite worried about, and I get it. I really get it because you might be dating someone really, really nice and wonderful, but you're still so young and you worry, is this really what's right for me? You can't tell whether you're gonna regret it or whether this is really a sign that you need to move on, you don't wanna waste their time.
1:03:08 Jemma Sbeg? What I'm basically describing right here is relationship anxiety or relationship OCD. Don't let the term fool you, it has nothing to do with how we typically see OCD. Essentially, it's this real sense of hypervigilance towards your relationship whereby you're constantly looking for things that could go wrong, not because they're a bad person, but because you're worried about making the wrong choice. It sounds like that's something that you may be battling with. On the other hand, it may be a deeper sign, you've noticed something about who you two are as a couple, maybe not consciously yet, but you're feeling it first in your gut.
1:03:50 Jemma Sbeg? Here's what I would say to you, if you're thinking about what it would look like to leave him more than you are thinking about your future with him, it's probably not the right relationship. The other question I would ask you is, if you knew you would find love again soon, if you knew that there was someone else out there who would love you as much as this person loves you now, would you leave? Is this just a safe place to land? Is this just an in the meantime? Relationship. I think be really, really honest with yourself. Also acknowledge and somewhat, some people might not be happy with me for saying this, but you don't need to make a decision right now. Like I said, intuition gives you time.
1:04:34 Jemma Sbeg? Anxiety wants you to make a decision right now. Relationships naturally go through ebbs and flows and hard points and great points. It might just be that you're in a bit of a rut right now. I wouldn't want you to give up a really amazing relationship. Because you've been sold this idea that couples can never have low points. So that's my advice on that one. Question number three asked over on Instagram. When do you know if you should push through a comfort zone or if it's actually just unsafe? Good question. It's hard to tell. My natural desire is to always push through.
1:05:14 Jemma Sbeg? I think that discomfort is something that we as humans are not good at managing, especially in a world where we don't have to be that uncomfortable if we don't want to be. You know, we truly don't, we can be warm at all times. Most of us, thank gosh, can have food in our belly at all times. We don't experience extreme discomfort anymore. Sometimes a little bit of discomfort is a good thing in this situation. Unless you can point to evidence that this is actually going to be an unsafe thing. So can you see examples of it? I think about this with travelling. Are there stories of people being kidnapped in the country you're going to? Are there stories of, or I don't know, Google reviews that the zip line you're gonna do
1:05:59 Jemma Sbeg? is a little bit dangerous? It's important not to be arrogant. Just because we are trusting our intuition doesn't mean that we ignore anxiety at all points. It is still an important resource. So when you're feeling like there is uh something that's holding you back and you think that it's because it's unsafe, investigate the evidence for that thing. Take a couple of minutes to walk yourself back from the situation and see it more clearly. I also would say do things to make whatever you're going through feel more safe, but still keep going. So I'm trying to think of like what you might be talking about, say it's your career.
1:06:42 Jemma Sbeg? It feels uncomfortable. You think that that's a sign that you're doing the wrong thing. Try and make ways to make your career, the way that you're pushing it more comfortable. So try and find different income streams to keep yourself financially stable. Maybe that's the source of the discomfort whilst still pushing forward. I think that's like a really great way to say it, like, you know, people didn't stop building skyscrapers because it was unsafe or uncomfortable. They kept building them and they built them with safety measures. I think you can do the same in your life. I don't know why I just suddenly used a construction metaphor. I think that's the first time that's ever happened during this podcast. So whoever's question that is, you should feel very privileged.
1:07:25 Jemma Sbeg? All right. Final question. I get visceral morning scaries when I wake up. Is it my body trying to tell me something? This is a great question. It's a great question because I I get this a lot. I get morning scaries. Probably like five days a week. Um. In terms of whether it's trying to tell you something like about your future or about your life in a mystical way, I don't think so. I think what you're probably experiencing is an elevated cortisol awakening response. So that's morning anxiety. Basically, when you wake up, um, sometimes we can have this huge surge in our stress hormone cortisol.
1:08:06 Jemma Sbeg? It's meant to help us just be alive and awake to the world. When that's dysregulated, it can actually go too far the other way and make us quite anxious. Um. It's important not to read too much into it. Sometimes I think we can have those, again, very visceral emotional responses and say, that's a sign, something's wrong. I have cancer, someone's gonna die. No, I think that there's often the simplest responses, the best one. Focus on your sleep hygiene, focus on trying to bring down your cortisol levels and your stress response before. Before going to bed and after waking up, so no phone in your bedroom.
1:08:46 Jemma Sbeg? You have no idea what a bright blue light in your face before you go to bed and right after you wake up does to your stress response and your circadian rhythm. So try and control that. Try not to have any bright lights in the bedroom and also review your alarm schedule. So it's actually best to wake up naturally at the end of a full sleep cycle. If your alarm is like waking you up at like six hours and fifty five minutes, maybe do it for like seven and a half hours and try and go to bed earlier or get that sleep in. Because if you're waking up in the middle of a sleep schedule, you're waking up in the middle of a dream, you're waking up in the middle of REM sleep, you are going to be more anxious. So
1:09:30 Jemma Sbeg? again, simplest solution is probably the best one. I don't think that this is a sign of anything or trying to tell you something other than that your sleep patterns are maybe just a little bit off. And if it keeps happening, um, go and see a doctor. They have these really cool sleep studies right now. Um, and see if you're fearing feeling it in other areas of your life. If you're not feeling it in other areas of your life, I do think it's just linked back to what this is. I think that is all the questions that I have for for today. I'm just reviewing my notes and it looks like that is the case. A long episode. If you have made it this far, you know the deal. A special emoji coming your way.
1:10:12 Jemma Sbeg? I want you to leave an emoji that best represents to you what intuition feels like. What does it feel like in your body? What does it feel like in your soul, in your limbs, in your brain? If you've made it that far, this far, I mean, um, let me know in the comments using that little sneaky sign. As always, I want to thank you for listening. I really loved this episode. Sometimes you just make an episode and you think, fuck, sorry to swear, but like, fuck, I really like this episode. I really like this episode. So I appreciate you listening this far. Make sure that you are following me on Instagram at that psychology podcast. We are doing more like listener questions. So if you want to get involved in some upcoming
1:10:54 Jemma Sbeg? episodes, that's a great way to do it. Also, if you feel like there is a friend of yours who could really benefit from this episode, make sure to share it with them. I would love to hear from you. I would love to see more people listening, more people following, more people giving us a five star review if you feel called to do so. But thanks again. Thanks for coming along with me on this really fun episode ride. Until next time, stay safe, be kind, be gentle with yourself, and we will talk very, very soon.
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