Les Mascots

In this wild episode, host Andrew Santino sits down with the stars of the new comedy series Les Mascots: John Feitelberg, & Tommy Smokes. We dive into their behind-the-scenes life, the making of the show, how two struggling actors end up working as street-costumed characters in Times Square, and what the future holds for this production. 🎥 Check out the full series and latest from Les Mascots on YouTube: https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLRxlXZ-3_3FVancNLiFx9MeXu6U-R-AEH&si=bYx72g6ET_Ja11Sz 👉 Don’t forget: Subscribe to the Whiskey Ginger channel and hit the 🔔 for more episodes. Like & comment below to let us know what part of the conversation resonated most. Share this with a friend who loves comedy, Barstool culture, or just wants a good laugh. #LesMascots #AndrewSantino #WhiskeyGinger #ComedyPodcast #BarstoolSports #BehindTheScenes #PodcastEpisode #TVSeries ======================================================== Sponsor Whiskey Ginger: https://public.liveread.io/media-kit/whiskeyginger SUPPORT OUR SPONSORS FACTOR PROMO CODE: WHISKEY50OFF SAVE 50% OFF YOUR 1ST BOX https://factormeals.com/whiskey50off MANDO PROMO CODE: WHISKEY 20% OFF SITEWIDE https://shopmando.com ======================================================== Follow Andrew Santino: https://www.instagram.com/cheetosantino/ https://twitter.com/CheetoSantino Follow Whiskey Ginger: https://www.instagram.com/whiskeygingerpodcast https://twitter.com/whiskeygingerpodcast Produced and edited by Joe Faria https://www.instagram.com/itsjoefaria Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

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• 0:30Speaker 01

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• 1:00Andrew Santino?

  What up, we're Ginger fans. Welcome back to the show. It's your first time joining the show, welcome to the show. We got a good one for you today and I am on tour. I am on the road, hitting the road again. I'm going to be at the Punch Line in San Francisco, Halloween weekend. I think it's all sold out, but there is a waiting list. Then I'm down in Brea Improv. Brea, come out and see your boy. Tempe Improv, my return to Arizona State University. Two shows I think are already sold out. Grab those tickets. Then I go to Hammond, Indiana, down at the Horseshoe during the week before Turkey Day. I'm in Windsor, Ontario, Canada, in the new year. Bethlehem, PA, God bless. Hanover, Maryland. The Borgata in Atlantic City, New Jersey is selling fast. I love you. Thank you, Atlantic City. Then Harris in Valley Center, which is by San Diego. That's my little homage to Bobby.

• 1:43Andrew Santino?

  Canyonville, Oregon for Lover's Day for February 14th, V-Day. And then I'm at the Win Casino in Las Vegas. The Win, I'm excited to come back out to Las Vegas. Go get your ticket to andrewsantino.com. Andrew Santino.com.

• 1:55Speaker 03

  In here, we pour whiskey, whiskey, whiskey, whiskey.

• 2:01Speaker 04

  Who's that creature in the ginger beard? Sturdy and ginger. Like vampires, the ginger gene is a curse. Gingers are beautiful. You owe me $5. Ginger, I like gingers.

• 2:20Andrew Santino?

  Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to Whiskey Ginger. My guests today are some of my favorite people on earth. I say that for all my guests, but I mean, once again, today it's Feitelberg and Tommy Smokes here for Les Mascots. Les Mascots, or just mascots.

• 2:30Speaker 05

  Whatever you want to call it.

• 2:31Andrew Santino?

  Whatever we want to call it.

• 2:32Speaker 05

  But we were just talking, we've had Rob McElhenney on the show before, and he was talking about how he names his shows really long names and people shorten them themselves. He was on the show promoting Mythic Quest, which season one was called Mythic Quest Ravens Banquet or something like that.

• 2:51Andrew Santino?

  That sounds right.

• 2:51Speaker 05

  And he was like, yeah, I just named dumb names and then people shortened it themselves. They go sunny, they go Mythic Quest.

• 2:56Andrew Santino?

  That's true.

• 2:57Speaker 05

  And I was kind of like, I like that.

• 2:58Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, let them figure it out.

• 2:59Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 3:00Andrew Santino?

  How did you get this nickname, Tommy Smokes?

• 3:02Speaker 06

  Uh.

• 3:03Andrew Santino?

  Do you smoke?

• 3:04Speaker 06

  No, well, there's a couple of long stories. Well, I could, I could abbreviate them. First one, so I got hired to be a social media intern at Barstool when I was in college. And my first job was running the Barstool Smoke Shows Instagram account, which is just a bunch of hot girls.

• 3:17Andrew Santino?

  Guys, girls?

• 3:18Speaker 06

  Girls. I mean, you know.

• 3:19Andrew Santino?

  Why wasn't there a guys one on Barstool for some reason?

• 3:21Speaker 05

  Yeah, that's a great question.

• 3:22Andrew Santino?

  Is there not a hot guy Barstool thing?

• 3:24Speaker 06

  It's just us. It's mascots.

• 3:27Andrew Santino?

  Is it just you?

• 3:28Speaker 06

  That's the hot guy. See, I just posted as like a 20 year old horny college kid. My job was to go through a bunch of Instagram models sending themselves in.

• 3:36Andrew Santino?

  Wow, tough gig, eh?

• 3:37Speaker 06

  It was tough. And listen, I ran, I ran the shield with integrity and honesty. There, a lot of guys, they would have got, they would have got fired in that spot. Not me.

• 3:45Andrew Santino?

  You didn't break the code?

• 3:46Speaker 06

  Never broke the.

• 3:47Andrew Santino?

  Did you do, you didn't side DM anybody and, and, and use your power and privilege to go, hey, let's go get coffee?

• 3:52Speaker 06

  No, because I knew like Dave is just too scary where I would have got fired for sure. I became like a therapist to these women because they would be like, like they're all the, I swear to God, all the, all the comment, I'm actually going to find you guys a text right now. But all the comments would be like, this girl's father fucking hates her. Her left boob is bigger than her right boob. And they would like text me and be like, you got to take this down. Be like, honey, you're beautiful. Like, don't listen to these guys.

• 4:17Andrew Santino?

  Just walking them through a barrage. Of internet trolls, incels insulting them for no reason.

• 4:22Speaker 06

  I gotta find, when I, I, I put up a big Lou Gehrig type retirement post. And I remember this one girl sending me, fuck, I don't know if I could find it, this long message that was like, oh, here, thank you for all that you did to make each and every one of us feel so beautiful. I'll always remember your kindness. It's great to see your career with Barstool has blossomed into something iconic.

• 4:42Andrew Santino?

  That's beautiful.

• 4:43Speaker 05

  That's really, really nice.

• 4:44Speaker 06

  It was six years ago. That's how nice it was? I still remember it to bring up on podcast.

• 4:48Andrew Santino?

  That's really cool, dude. Take that to the bank. You're a solid dude.

• 4:51Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 4:52Andrew Santino?

  Like you got out of there, you did, you, you protected, what did you say? I, you protected the shield, is that what you said?

• 4:56Speaker 06

  Yeah, I protected the shield.

• 4:57Andrew Santino?

  God bless, dude.

• 4:58Speaker 05

  It's also like, were they all talking to each other about you? Like how she said like things for taking care of all of us?

• 5:03Speaker 06

  It's almost like they had a network.

• 5:04Andrew Santino?

  What, you've never met a girl before?

• 5:05Speaker 05

  Yeah. But there are girls that like, they're not, they're not from a friend group, they're just from random girls.

• 5:09Andrew Santino?

  It doesn't matter, dude.

• 5:09Speaker 06

  He hasn't tried to fuck you either?

• 5:10Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 5:11Speaker 06

  Is he gay?

• 5:12Andrew Santino?

  Did he try to fuck you? Did he try to fuck you? Did he try to fuck you? It was all, and then they all were like, no, he's gay, he's sweet. He's a sweet little gay guy, he's not interested in us. Good job on that, dude. That's gotta be a tough. Dave, by the way, I will say, uh, we don't really know each other, but we did, we've run into each other a few times. And the one line he said, a very Dave line that I thought, this is why you're good at you, is, I said, uh, he said, oh, you're, you're skinny, huh? He's skinny. I said, I've lost a little bit of weight. I go, I mean, you're looking pretty good. You're looking, oh, he's tan, dude. He goes, you can't tone it, tan it. And I was like, that's such a great.

• 5:45Speaker 06

  Hang on a second. You're giving Dave Portnoy the credit for that line?

• 5:48Andrew Santino?

  Well, who said it?

• 5:49Speaker 06

  Oh, I don't know. That's, that one's out there.

• 5:50Andrew Santino?

  See, I've never heard that before.

• 5:51Speaker 06

  I've never heard it either.

• 5:52Andrew Santino?

  You haven't heard it?

• 5:53Speaker 06

  That's because of this. That's because of the skin tone right here.

• 5:55Andrew Santino?

  I'm not allowed. I'm not allowed.

• 5:55Speaker 06

  Yeah, no one, no one, everyone's like, don't tell Santino the secret.

• 5:58Andrew Santino?

  But also, you're not, you're not Mr. Tan.

• 6:00Speaker 06

  I, I've just been around people who say it.

• 6:03Andrew Santino?

  If you can't tone, if you can't tone it, tan.

• 6:05Speaker 06

  If you can't tone it, tan it.

• 6:06Andrew Santino?

  I've never heard this. Have you heard this phrase before? If you can't tone it, tan it? No, see?

• 6:10Speaker 06

  Really?

• 6:10Speaker 05

  I think we're giving Dave credit.

• 6:11Speaker 06

  All right, well, I'll get to Victoria now.

• 6:13Andrew Santino?

  Vic, come here. You, have you ever heard of the phrase, if you can't tone it, tan it? Who said that? Huh? My mom. I don't know. Okay, never mind.

• 6:24Speaker 05

  So your mom knows Dave?

• 6:26Andrew Santino?

  It's your mom.

• 6:26Speaker 06

  He thought, he thought Dave Portnoy invented that one.

• 6:28Andrew Santino?

  Well, he said it to me and I'd never heard someone say it. It's almost like a street joke that you're like, well, I haven't heard that one before.

• 6:33Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 6:33Andrew Santino?

  So you gotta give the last person credit that said it.

• 6:35Speaker 06

  That's fair.

• 6:38Andrew Santino?

  I've had enough of you, alright? I already thanked you in the credits for my special. She named my special.

• 6:43Speaker 05

  Did you?

• 6:43Andrew Santino?

  She did, she actually did. She came to see me do it on the west side when I was warming it up.

• 6:48Speaker 05

  White Noise?

• 6:48Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, and we were deliberating the names. We just couldn't break it down over what was gonna be the... Because special naming is such... Look, we'll get into this with you too. Naming anything is a nightmare because you're like, "How do people interpret this and what does this mean to them? And are they looking for a story for it to tie to?" And eventually, I think the original na... What was it? Do you remember the first name that we put out? What was the first name that we had?

• 7:08Speaker 07

  Originally it was Whiskey Ginger, and then it was Ubetcha.

• 7:11Andrew Santino?

  Oh, Ubetcha, right. Ubetcha was another iteration because it was in Minnesota.

• 7:14Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 7:14Andrew Santino?

  And I was like, "Oh, that's really nice for them, the hometown." You know, it's not my hometown, but it's like for them. It was a cool moment. At the beginning of the show, we made them yell Ubetcha. It was really fun.

• 7:23Speaker 05

  Was Whiskey Ginger like, just kinda like a brand recognition?

• 7:26Andrew Santino?

  Just a parlay on the brand, yeah. Just to be like, "It's me anyway." And people, people do know, know... A lot of times, people will say Ginger Whiskey, and I'm like, "Either way, doesn't matter." Either way, it's fine with me. But we couldn't figure out the name. I didn't like either of them. I put them in as temps. And I was like, "I don't really know." And then she came and saw me on the west side. We went out to dinner. And she was kinda giving me notes over like, the flow of everything and how it was. And then she said, um, "Why don't you just do White Noise?" Because there's a joke in there about White Noise. And I was like, "God, that's so good, it's annoying." Like, it was just like, right in front of your face, one of those things.

• 7:59Speaker 07

  Should've had her name Les Mascots.

• 8:01Andrew Santino?

  Yeah. Well, Les Mascots, what? And you're, you have a little bit of beef with it, so you just call it Mascots anyway?

• 8:06Speaker 05

  No, I, we don't know, no beef whatsoever. It's just, it's easier to call it Mascots. Like, in the filming and, and like, we kinda just would refer to it as Mascots rather than Les Mascots.

• 8:15Andrew Santino?

  Sure.

• 8:15Speaker 05

  But it kinda like, like, as far as the show goes, it works with, it's Les Misérables. Like, Les Mascots makes sense.

• 8:21Andrew Santino?

  Good play.

• 8:22Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 8:22Andrew Santino?

  Your favorite play, isn't it?

• 8:24Speaker 05

  Actually, a play I've never seen.

• 8:25Andrew Santino?

  You've never seen Les Mis?

• 8:26Speaker 05

  I've never seen it.

• 8:26Andrew Santino?

  You've never seen it? Have you seen it? No!

• 8:29Speaker 05

  I've seen a lot of plays. Oh wait, speaking of a lot of plays, did you go to that one in Broadway, uh, in London?

• 8:34Andrew Santino?

  What? No, no, no. No, no, no, no.

• 8:36Speaker 05

  Nah, I didn't think so.

• 8:37Andrew Santino?

  You know what's so funny? I'll go see a play once a decade. It's gotta be the one that I'm like, everyone's talking about, like Book of Mormon, or it's gotta be something that's like, e-everyone's like, you really should.

• 8:47Speaker 05

  Can I tell you something?

• 8:49Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 8:49Speaker 05

  The one I told you about? Everyone will be talking about in a year.

• 8:52Andrew Santino?

  You think so?

• 8:53Speaker 05

  I'm gonna call that.

• 8:53Andrew Santino?

  You think so?

• 8:54Speaker 06

  He is, you're, he's the biggest Broadway guy I know.

• 8:56Andrew Santino?

  You're a big Broadway girl.

• 8:57Speaker 05

  I'm a huge Broadway guy.

• 8:58Andrew Santino?

  Well, tell, where did I run into you? Say it. You can tell everyone the story.

• 9:01Speaker 05

  Uh, we, we ran into each other. We were at the Churchill War Rooms in London.

• 9:05Andrew Santino?

  God bless Churchill, one of the greatest.

• 9:06Speaker 06

  My parents just went there. I didn't realize that's where you guys went.

• 9:08Speaker 05

  Yeah, yeah, we were right up front.

• 9:09Andrew Santino?

  We were out front waiting to get into like our time, this lot, or whatever. And we just ran into, I was like, what are you doing? It was so random.

• 9:16Speaker 05

  I saw you and I was like, geez, I'm gonna recognize me.

• 9:19Andrew Santino?

  Yes, what are you talking about, dude?

• 9:21Speaker 05

  I was like, oh shit!

• 9:21Andrew Santino?

  No, it's so nice to see you.

• 9:23Speaker 05

  But then, so we started talking, you were waiting for your time to go in, and I wanna hear about whether you liked it or not, 'cause I loved it.

• 9:28Andrew Santino?

  Oh, I loved it. My, there was only one hiccup.

• 9:30Speaker 05

  Okay.

• 9:30Andrew Santino?

  Too many people.

• 9:31Speaker 05

  Too many, definitely too many people.

• 9:32Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, I get, I get anxious when I'm, when there's too many people in crowded spaces, so I get a little, uh, uh, claustrophobic, and I, and it's low ceilings, underground. So there was a moment where I was like, ee, we gotta go, and my wife was like, chill out. I was like, how about, can we just go backwards? So what we did was, we waited for everyone to move through, and then, 'cause they're on tours.

• 9:50Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 9:50Andrew Santino?

  We didn't do a tour. Did you do a tour?

• 9:52Speaker 05

  Uh, I, we, we, we did that.

• 9:54Andrew Santino?

  But you didn't go with a group?

• 9:55Speaker 05

  No, no, no, we just grabbed our own headphones.

• 9:57Andrew Santino?

  People were with groups, and I was like, no, no, I'm not doing that fucking thing. So I went all the way to the beginning to wait for them to clear, and then we did it on our own.

• 10:03Speaker 05

  Oh, that's smart.

• 10:03Andrew Santino?

  That gives me less anxiety than trying to catch up with groups of people and like, I, I just, it, that-

• 10:09Speaker 05

  I'll go at my own speed, thank you very much.

• 10:10Andrew Santino?

  I have to go at my own speed. But it was incredible. Are you a Churchill fan?

• 10:13Speaker 05

  I, I am, uh, now.

• 10:14Andrew Santino?

  You are now?

• 10:15Speaker 05

  I, I wasn't, I mean, not that I wasn't, I just didn't really think much about it beforehand.

• 10:18Andrew Santino?

  What? You didn't think, my, every day of my life I think about Churchill.

• 10:21Speaker 05

  Churchill guy.

• 10:22Andrew Santino?

  All day, dude!

• 10:23Speaker 05

  Dude, when they were like, the, in the, in the war rooms, that, that, the one room, that first one to the right, where like, they did all the war-

• 10:30Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 10:30Speaker 05

  debating.

• 10:31Andrew Santino?

  Everything, yeah.

• 10:31Speaker 05

  And they were like, they're like, and the desks were this close, where it was like Churchill and his war secretary, and they were like, the rooms would be full of cigar smoke, and they'd be screaming at each other.

• 10:39Andrew Santino?

  Mm-hmm.

• 10:39Speaker 05

  I was like, alright, that was fucking-

• 10:41Andrew Santino?

  Amazing.

• 10:41Speaker 05

  It was also really cool when they had like his, his, uh, secret service guy and his only complaint with Churchill was he wouldn't stop going outside during the bombings.

• 10:49Andrew Santino?

  Right, they kept telling him to stop, but he wanted to go.

• 10:51Speaker 06

  He wanted to watch?

• 10:51Andrew Santino?

  He wanted to go outside. The guy's an outsider, would not have made it through covid Churchill. Had to step outside, this guy.

• 10:58Speaker 05

  They would watch the blitz, fucking drinking whiskey on roofs and they would just sit there and like watch London.

• 11:03Andrew Santino?

  If you knew the world was quote unquote coming to an end as you know it, you're gonna go outside.

• 11:06Speaker 06

  You wanna sneak a peek?

• 11:07Andrew Santino?

  Right, you're not a bunker boy, you're out there dude.

• 11:10Speaker 05

  I'm out there for sure.

• 11:11Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, I just figured why not, if it's over, it's over.

• 11:13Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 11:13Speaker 06

  Was it the bombings that he was calling or they were getting bombed?

• 11:16Speaker 05

  It was, no, they were getting bombed.

• 11:17Andrew Santino?

  They were getting bombed, yeah.

• 11:18Speaker 06

  Okay, that I'd be a little less inclined to watch.

• 11:20Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, but.

• 11:20Speaker 06

  I thought it was like he was bombing, I'm near, you're going out and taking a victory lap.

• 11:24Speaker 05

  London was getting bombed, which I also.

• 11:25Speaker 06

  That makes more sense.

• 11:26Speaker 05

  Had never, there's another interesting thing I, I thought, like going through the war rooms is that I had never, like, processed world war two from a country that was under attack. Like, I, I only ever thought of world war two as like.

• 11:38Andrew Santino?

  You only wanna be on the winning team, don't you?

• 11:39Speaker 05

  Like, we just went, we went over there, we knocked that shit out. Like, you know what I mean, like?

• 11:42Speaker 06

  That was a quick war.

• 11:43Speaker 05

  Fascism was never coming to America, like, it wasn't something we were scared of, it was just, we told them to knock it off and they knocked it off. And then I remember talking to British people, like, over there, and I was like, oh yeah, like, you guys were really in the shit.

• 11:55Andrew Santino?

  Different story.

• 11:56Speaker 05

  Different story.

• 11:57Andrew Santino?

  Well, Americans have lived a different story in everything, forever. We're always kind of exempt from being like, oh, we don't even know that happens. You're like, yeah, no, it's happening right now. It's going on literally right now, and we're like, whatever dude. I gotta get my coffee dude.

• 12:09Speaker 05

  Have you seen One Battle After Another or not, dude?

• 12:11Andrew Santino?

  We just, dude, we just talked about it.

• 12:13Speaker 05

  Did you?

• 12:13Andrew Santino?

  One of the best movies I've seen in years, have you seen One Battle?

• 12:15Speaker 05

  Not yet.

• 12:16Andrew Santino?

  Brother, go. Well, it's honestly one of the best films, front to back, and also from a comedy perspective, because we're comedy fans, it's the, one of the funniest things I've ever seen.

• 12:24Speaker 05

  I've seen it twice now, I can't wait to see it.

• 12:26Andrew Santino?

  See, I'm going again, when my cousin hasn't seen it, he was like, would you go twice? I was like, dude, I would, I wouldn't even skip a beat.

• 12:30Speaker 05

  I'm gonna go ten times.

• 12:31Andrew Santino?

  It's so good.

• 12:32Speaker 06

  I'm now afraid it won't, like, the, the hype that it's got, I'm afraid it won't live on.

• 12:36Andrew Santino?

  Promise you, promise you it will, only because, if you're a PTA fan at all, like, if you like his stuff, um, this is, we spoke pretty heavily earlier, it's kind of a return to, um, his best shit. Almost like, it's like when, when a band makes a bunch. A bunch of albums and they're pretty good, but then they pop out something and you're like, see, that sounds like the band that I know.

• 12:55Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 12:56Andrew Santino?

  Something reconvened with him that felt like the old PTA. Not that any of his other stuff was bad, but it was just, it felt, it felt like I wanted it to feel again. Where the characters were so dynamic and funny and cool and unique and very individual. They all had their own kind of like goals, but they bond together. It's badass.

• 13:13Speaker 05

  It's, man, I love even watching you talk about it.

• 13:16Andrew Santino?

  If it doesn't win, if it doesn't win something, whatever that means in the business world. I'd be very disappointed because it's tremendously well done. It's also tanking in the box office. This is the thing about the world we live in now. Thank God mascots isn't in the box office running. Cause dude, that, the movie cost, what is a couple hundred million?

• 13:32Speaker 05

  Hundred fifty, I think. One thirty, one fifty?

• 13:34Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, but then you go up for marketing and budgeting. So I think they had to make three to return.

• 13:38Speaker 05

  Really?

• 13:39Speaker 06

  Taylor Swift knocked them out.

• 13:41Andrew Santino?

  Brother, she knocked it down in the first like hour.

• 13:43Speaker 07

  They're worldwide, they're over a hundred million.

• 13:46Andrew Santino?

  Hundred is good worldwide, but that's not going to cut the cake.

• 13:48Speaker 07

  Yeah, domestically, they're still forty-two.

• 13:49Speaker 05

  But, and I guess you, you have more knowledge of this than I do, like, movies like that. When, when someone gives PTA a hundred fifty million dollars.

• 13:56Andrew Santino?

  Shouldn't have been that expensive.

• 13:57Speaker 05

  Are they, are they expecting to get that back?

• 14:01Andrew Santino?

  There's a lot of different worlds of thought, right? Like a lot of times in the film world, uh, what they do is, international sales, which is something I learned as a P A. When I first P A'd for a studio out here, the first thing I learned was a lot of movies target international distribution as like kind of their mainstay to get their money back on a film that may not do that great here. So you usually will use a lot of foreign actors or slot them in cleverly to go, hey, we could post, we could post this in China or, because China's a big moneymaker, you know what I mean? And so if you can do that and you've got international stardom, it helps distribution sales. Because over here, unless it's, you know, unless it's Minions eight, you're not really making a lot of, you're not, you're really not, or a superhero movie. So they do deliberately make sure that the international market has some appeal.

• 14:46Andrew Santino?

  So they can sell that outside of the States as big or bigger than they do here. So with that movie, I imagine they thought internationally it would start to, it would start a roll.

• 14:56Speaker 07

  And especially after the DVD market ceases to exist.

• 14:59Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 14:59Speaker 07

  Like that was a big way that movies in the nineties and early two thousands were able to make money.

• 15:03Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 15:03Speaker 05

  But is there ever a thought where they're like?

• 15:05Andrew Santino?

  They're never gonna take a loss. The argument, what you're saying is no.

• 15:07Speaker 05

  So like, they're not like, we're cool losing 25 million if it gets two Oscars for our studio.

• 15:12Andrew Santino?

  No, no, the point is to always make the money back. He is probably an award darling, but you always want to make a profit.

• 15:18Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 15:18Andrew Santino?

  Those guys, that's their goal. I mean, they're, they're basically banks. This is Bank of America, Wells Fargo going, hey, we'll bankroll you. We do need to get that money back and then some. You have to find the most clever ways you can. Sell it to Delta, so it's shown on every plane. Sell it to, you know, these tertiary markets, or they call them like, um, what do they call them now? Uh, it's almost like these parallel markets where you can sell it on different platforms as they go through, you know, um, Roku and whatever, you know what I mean? They need to put out as many markets as possible.

• 15:48Speaker 05

  But something like, um, what was Leo's last one with fuck it, uh, Killers of the Flower Moon? Like, that was like 200 million from Apple, and then it only stayed in theaters for like two weeks or whatever it was.

• 15:56Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, Apple.

• 15:57Speaker 05

  They, they know, they, no, I know, but like, but they're not, so they're, they're, but they're okay losing the money.

• 16:02Andrew Santino?

  They don't care. Yeah, they make phones.

• 16:03Speaker 05

  They're okay losing.

• 16:04Andrew Santino?

  They make phones and headphones and, and, uh, and war missiles soon, I hope.

• 16:08Speaker 05

  And the same thing they just, they just did.

• 16:10Andrew Santino?

  The new Apple missile.

• 16:13Speaker 05

  They just did it with highest to lowest, too. We're like, it's a Denzel Spike Lee movie that was in theaters for a week. Like, obviously you're not gonna get your fucking.

• 16:18Andrew Santino?

  No, probably not. But you, they'll find a way in perpetuity to sell that and makes, it will do, it will in, in time, will make money over. But it takes much, much lo, it's a longer gamble.

• 16:29Speaker 05

  But so you, but that, I guess that's my final question. So I'm doing a bad job.

• 16:32Andrew Santino?

  Fucking lottery ticket.

• 16:33Speaker 05

  Buying a house versus a lottery ticket.

• 16:35Andrew Santino?

  It's a long play.

• 16:35Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 16:36Andrew Santino?

  It's a long play. You're hoping that the market goes up and you continue to sell it and things improve and then, then you're good.

• 16:41Speaker 05

  And no one knows.

• 16:42Andrew Santino?

  Versus a scratcher.

• 16:43Speaker 07

  Those will never make their money back, though.

• 16:44Andrew Santino?

  No, no, they don't. They, in, in, in an idyllic world, they will a long time down the road in some variation, but, no, quite frankly, no.

• 16:53Speaker 07

  But it's also like how Coca-Cola still advertises. You don't, they don't need to, it's for branding.

• 16:56Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it's branding. Apple doesn't give a fuck. Apple is gonna make rockets soon. I do hope, imagine Tim Poole on stage promoting their new rocket.

• 17:04Andrew Santino?

  And this rocket, applause break, will track the enemy for five days straight.

• 17:11Andrew Santino?

  It was crazy. I saw a guy who had the new AirPods in and their live translation. You know, have you seen this?

• 17:17Speaker 05

  I haven't seen them, but I know them.

• 17:19Andrew Santino?

  It's pretty cool to see it work in real time. I thought that was pretty fascinating.

• 17:22Speaker 05

  I can't even.

• 17:23Andrew Santino?

  It does. It does work. There's a lag, but it does work enough. So this is just the window into the future where we're gonna travel. Like, what? When we saw each other in London, right? You're gonna go take a trip and you're gonna go to Spain or something. Throw these in and then go, hey, I don't even, I no longer need it.

• 17:38Speaker 06

  So you're saying like the other person talks and you hear it translate?

• 17:41Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 17:42Speaker 06

  This should be the biggest piece of news ever.

• 17:46Speaker 06

  I thought this should be a way bigger story.

• 17:47Speaker 05

  You don't know about this?

• 17:48Speaker 06

  I've not heard of this. This has not come across my desk.

• 17:52Andrew Santino?

  Well, you're busy, you're busy talking girls off of a ledge for being verbally assaulted by pigs online.

• 17:57Speaker 06

  You ladies gotta hear about this here next to the pizza trip.

• 18:01Andrew Santino?

  That is what you need. That's what you needed. Make these girls feel good about going to the Philippines.

• 18:06Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 18:07Andrew Santino?

  No, but they get live translated and if you wanna speak in their native tongue, you talk to the app and you show them and it live translates your words for their language.

• 18:16Speaker 06

  Interesting.

• 18:17Andrew Santino?

  Unless you both got the headphones in and then it's home free.

• 18:20Speaker 06

  The UN.

• 18:21Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, right, right. Then you're in Churchill's war room communicating.

• 18:25Speaker 05

  Wait, but the, about that?

• 18:27Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 18:27Speaker 05

  Wait, no, you go first.

• 18:28Andrew Santino?

  No, no, no. Say it.

• 18:29Speaker 05

  So about the war room thing from earlier is we talked outside for a while and we talked outside and I think you were waiting on your time to get in. And it wasn't a quick, like, five-minute talk. We talked for like 30 minutes.

• 18:38Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it was a half an hour. Yeah. I clocked it because I was getting annoyed. I'm kidding, I'm kidding.

• 18:43Speaker 05

  He did say, he was like, I talked to him for way too long.

• 18:45Andrew Santino?

  No, no, no.

• 18:47Speaker 05

  I kept trying to get away. I was like, I'm keeping Santino and his wife.

• 18:50Andrew Santino?

  No, no, no. I loved it.

• 18:51Speaker 05

  Um, but the, so like a half hour into the conversation, Les Masquats was coming out in like a week. And I was like, 30 minutes in, I was like, I guess I'll bring it up. Like, I don't know. I didn't wanna bring it up immediately, but I was like, 30 minutes later, I was like, I guess I'll bring it up. And then right when I was about to bring it up, you go, you know who I just saw at Wimbledon? And I was like, no. And you go, you name somebody and you're like, first thing he did was pitch a show to me.

• 19:15Speaker 05

  And you go, I thought he was a lot cooler than that.

• 19:19Andrew Santino?

  Your ego just goes, "Oh, no."

• 19:21Speaker 05

  I was like, "Well, fuck it. There's no way for me to segue into this now." I'm working on nothing, by the way, in case you're wondering.

• 19:27Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, just been sitting around the house, man. No, it was, I know what you're referencing, yes. Somebody did do like a whole, "Hey, can I throw you something?" I was like, "Dude, I'm here with my wife to watch tennis."

• 19:37Speaker 05

  Yeah, yeah.

• 19:37Andrew Santino?

  And also, I didn't belong there at all. Wimbledon was such a fluke. We got offered through... I'm not a big tennis freak, but I just love live shit. I will go to any live sport. I don't know if you're a sports freak. Dude, I don't care what it is. I will go. Like, if someone's like, "Hey, there's a highlight match downtown," I'd be like, "Let's go."

• 19:53Speaker 05

  I was at Ohio State-Minnesota Saturday night.

• 19:57Andrew Santino?

  Were you?

• 19:57Speaker 05

  Yep.

• 19:58Andrew Santino?

  How was that?

• 19:58Speaker 05

  It was fucking awesome.

• 19:59Andrew Santino?

  It was great.

• 20:00Speaker 05

  It was great.

• 20:00Andrew Santino?

  You have no allegiance to either.

• 20:01Speaker 05

  None whatsoever. I was in Columbus for a hockey game. I played, I played a hockey game yesterday. Flew Southwest here last night.

• 20:08Andrew Santino?

  Give it up. See that? He's, you see what he's doing? Humble. Southwest, brother. This kid flew Sun Country this morning.

• 20:13Speaker 05

  Oh, this morning?

• 20:14Andrew Santino?

  Barely an airline.

• 20:15Speaker 05

  Yeah, but did you play hockey yesterday?

• 20:16Andrew Santino?

  No, he went to a wedding. No, I went to a wedding.

• 20:18Speaker 05

  Alright, so you're like, "I'm, I'm traveling like a WNBA player over here."

• 20:21Andrew Santino?

  Do you know about Sun Country?

• 20:22Speaker 05

  I, I actually genuinely have no idea what that is.

• 20:24Andrew Santino?

  Some of the planes don't make it. That's kind of their slogan.

• 20:26Speaker 07

  It is a Minnesota airline, though. They fly in and out of Minnesota.

• 20:29Speaker 05

  Sun Country?

• 20:29Speaker 07

  Sun Country.

• 20:30Andrew Santino?

  Sun Country, and they're also-

• 20:31Speaker 05

  Weird name for a Minnesota airline.

• 20:32Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, they're also in the Pacific Northwest, right? You can do Sun Countries to like Portland and Washington. They go up there, too.

• 20:37Speaker 07

  Yeah, but their base out of MSP.

• 20:39Andrew Santino?

  Yeah. Tough, tough, tough airline.

• 20:41Speaker 05

  Worst airline I ever took was called Taka. You know that one?

• 20:44Andrew Santino?

  Brother.

• 20:45Speaker 05

  Do you know it?

• 20:46Speaker 07

  Do you need some money?

• 20:48Andrew Santino?

  Is this what this is about? This whole thing was leading up to me giving you a loan?

• 20:52Speaker 05

  The only reason we made masks was for this moment. No, this is, I was in high school at the time, and I was-

• 20:56Andrew Santino?

  Taka?

• 20:57Speaker 05

  Yeah. It was, um, I was, I, I went to a school with a lot of international students, and I was going to visit-

• 21:02Andrew Santino?

  Where'd you go to college? Braggot?

• 21:03Speaker 05

  College? No.

• 21:04Andrew Santino?

  No, what do you mean, school? Oh, you mean high school?

• 21:05Speaker 05

  High school, yeah. Um, and, uh, and there's a girl from El Salvador who I was going to see back home in her, in her home country. And I just flew Taka, and I flew home, and my uncle, who's a pilot, was like, "Oh, how'd you get down there?" And I said, "I flew Taka." And he like, he's never gotten stern with me, never gotten angry with me, and he's like, "Are you fucking kidding me right now?"

• 21:26Andrew Santino?

  Don't ever do that again.

• 21:28Speaker 05

  Call that in the industry? He said, no, he goes, we call it Taka another airline because that's fucking dang.

• 21:34Speaker 05

  That's a great little nickname.

• 21:35Speaker 06

  Are they still operating?

• 21:36Speaker 05

  I have no, I believe it was T A K A if I had to remember.

• 21:39Speaker 07

  T A C A, it merged with Avianca in 2013 and now operates as Avianca El Salvador.

• 21:45Speaker 05

  Yeah. Avianca El Salvador.

• 21:46Speaker 06

  I thought you were down to El Salvador, they gotta.

• 21:49Speaker 07

  We gotta get you down there, dude.

• 21:51Speaker 06

  No, I got down to, I went to El Salvador this year. I swear. I know it sounds like a joke.

• 21:54Speaker 07

  What, what were you going for?

• 21:56Speaker 00

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• 22:27Speaker 01

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• 22:57Speaker 06

  Just a week, which I know sounds.

• 22:59Speaker 07

  Just a solo weekend?

• 23:00Speaker 06

  No, no, no. My, my friend's girlfriend was going on a big girls' trip, uh, for like Memorial Day weekend and I don't know why they picked El Salvador. And they were like, do you two want to just come with us? And then all of her friends dropped out because they're all from Ireland, said like visa issues. Just me, my friend, his girlfriend and one of her friends staying at like this really nice Airbnb in El Salvador. I'll tell you what. I guess if you're a criminal down there, bad. If you're an American, lovely time.

• 23:25Andrew Santino?

  Isn't that the lesson in life? If you're an American, it's all good. It is funny, that's how privileged we are. You forget about visas, because when we travel, you're like, oh right, you guys just can't go everywhere.

• 23:35Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 23:35Andrew Santino?

  We can go fucking anywhere, unless you're on a worker's permit, but if for a commuter visa, you don't really need, well, you used to years ago, for certain countries. But now, most of the time, they're like, American, and it's fucking, go ahead.

• 23:47Speaker 05

  You know what I heard, and I don't know if this is true or not, that international airports had to put, um, foreigners and United States citizens. For like, for like, the passport lines.

• 23:59Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 23:59Speaker 05

  Because no United States citizen thinks of themselves as a foreigner. Even when they're in a different country. So the lines would.

• 24:06Speaker 06

  This is my country.

• 24:06Speaker 05

  The lines would get all confusing, unless they had to change it to put foreigners and.

• 24:10Andrew Santino?

  You think I'm a foreigner, dude? From a base country in the world, I'm foreign about that. That is the American ego at its finest. I mean, it sounds like a Trump law. And we need our own lines. It sounds like, you know what I mean, like, we need to be seen as an individual. How, El Salvador, did it do anything for you in the terms of like, you'd go back, or no?

• 24:31Speaker 06

  I was honestly thinking about investing down there. I almost wanted to.

• 24:33Andrew Santino?

  What?

• 24:35Speaker 06

  Like, not in the stock market.

• 24:36Andrew Santino?

  Layman Scott's doing that good.

• 24:38Speaker 06

  I was like, I almost want to buy a house down here. I feel like it's on the up and up.

• 24:42Andrew Santino?

  Is it?

• 24:43Speaker 06

  It was, it was very safe. We stayed in El Tunco, it's like a surfer town, so it was like, very safe. Everything was dirt cheap. I mean, listen, they put everyone in jail. If you did even something a little bit wrong, you went in jail.

• 24:54Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 24:54Speaker 06

  Which you could say, well, it worked for making a fun trip for an American for a weekend.

• 24:58Andrew Santino?

  So, are you a surfer?

• 25:00Speaker 06

  No.

• 25:00Andrew Santino?

  No, no, no. You say that, but I don't, we don't know. We talked the other day about people that have surprised me that surf, that live out here. There's a group of guys I know that surf in the morning, like, there's comics and, and people we know. I bet half of them you'd go, "You're a surfer now."

• 25:13Speaker 05

  Really?

• 25:14Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, because I think surfer is just a commitment thing too, right? You have to have the level of athleticism has to exist, but it's commitment. You have to do it all the fucking time.

• 25:22Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 25:22Andrew Santino?

  It's just, it's just if you go enough and you've learned enough, you may not be a great surfer, but you're better than the guy who's never done it. Because if you've never done it, it's fucking impossible.

• 25:31Speaker 05

  It's more about like the insanity dedication to it rather than like the athleticism.

• 25:35Andrew Santino?

  You have to do it. Once you learn it and you can do it, it's almost like, do you ski at all? Like, do you ski or snowboard or no?

• 25:40Speaker 06

  Listen, I'm an only child from Long Island who pees 20 times a day. Anything you think about me is true. I don't have a peanut allergy. That's the one surprising fact that always gets everyone.

• 25:50Andrew Santino?

  Do you need to call your mom at some point during the show to make sure everything's okay?

• 25:52Speaker 06

  No, I don't call her mom that much. We'll text, we'll text.

• 25:55Andrew Santino?

  We'll text in the middle of the podcast?

• 25:57Speaker 06

  Yeah, I'm doing okay.

• 25:58Andrew Santino?

  Still podding. I love you mommy.

• 25:59Speaker 05

  My dad's actually already called me during this podcast and he, I have my phone on Do Not Disturb right now.

• 26:05Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 26:06Speaker 05

  But my dad, he found out that if you call twice, it takes off the Do Not Disturb.

• 26:12Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, smart.

• 26:12Speaker 05

  And he, he talks about it like he found this key. Like he'll tell like people.

• 26:17Speaker 06

  Like it's the headphone technology.

• 26:18Speaker 05

  It'll be like, John Henry's got his phone on silent a lot, but if you just call it twice, it gets through. I'm like, dude, that's not, that's not the point. The point is.

• 26:27Speaker 06

  I found a hack.

• 26:28Speaker 05

  I'm doing something right now.

• 26:29Andrew Santino?

  How old is your father?

• 26:30Speaker 05

  Not that old, like 65 maybe?

• 26:32Andrew Santino?

  Let him have it. Let him have this moment and be like, you know, my dad, in front of him and other people, just go, "You know what my dad discovered?" Let him have that, because that's a beautiful thing for that age.

• 26:43Speaker 06

  My brilliant tech savvy dad discovered.

• 26:45Speaker 05

  When the phone's on Do Not Disturb, you keep calling it, it just goes through.

• 26:49Andrew Santino?

  Because my dad still has like the TV, so he refuses to get a new cable box because he doesn't want to deal with Comcast or whatever, and it's been on the fritz. So like he'll be watching football and it'll just like skip or pause or something will go wrong with it. And the TV's new. I'm like, it's not the TV, it's the box. Like it's obviously the box. And he goes, "No, but if you unplug it, plug it back in, it's fine again." I'm like, "Right." You know what, you're right. You know what? You're right. I let him just have it, because why fight with him about it? It's, you gotta let our parents have, my parents are in their seventies, let them have the glory days. Let them just, this is, you know what I mean? The little nuggets they find and they go, you know what I found out? Just go, is that right?

• 27:28Speaker 05

  Dude, let me tell you about my dad's, this is from a few years ago. My dad discovered water.

• 27:34Andrew Santino?

  Sorry?

• 27:35Speaker 05

  And he would call me all the time and he'd be like, I think you're supposed to be drinking a lot of water.

• 27:40Andrew Santino?

  This is a new discovery for your father.

• 27:42Speaker 05

  He, because he was painting the house and he didn't drink water all day and he ended up in the hospital.

• 27:48Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 27:48Speaker 05

  Because he was dehydrated painting the house in the summer. And he called me from the hospital and he's like, John Henry, I hope you're drinking water. And I was like, Dad, I drink it all day, every day.

• 27:57Andrew Santino?

  That's the thing I like, yeah.

• 27:58Speaker 05

  And now like, once a week, I'll get a call. He's like, you been drinking water?

• 28:01Andrew Santino?

  Did he, did he, did he ever get, uh, uh, uh, stones?

• 28:04Speaker 05

  No, he was fine.

• 28:05Andrew Santino?

  Because stones happen when you don't drink enough water and I know young men get it because they're like, what if water's in everything?

• 28:10Speaker 05

  Our office is insane. Our office gets kidney stones all the time.

• 28:13Speaker 06

  You would think they're like contagious with the way we get them.

• 28:16Andrew Santino?

  Really? Well, because they're probably drinking coffee and energy drinks and not water.

• 28:19Speaker 05

  They'll always try and blame it on something healthy, new that they've been doing. I think it's like the matcha I've been drinking.

• 28:25Andrew Santino?

  No, that's not it dude.

• 28:26Speaker 05

  Dude, it's not. It's the way we live our lives.

• 28:28Andrew Santino?

  Right. Well, you're talking about young, the office has got to be filled with young kids, young men.

• 28:32Speaker 05

  Oh, yeah.

• 28:33Andrew Santino?

  Who are addicted to energy drinks now, because that's the new shit. Are you on this?

• 28:38Speaker 05

  No, I'm not an energy drinker.

• 28:39Andrew Santino?

  You pass that, right?

• 28:40Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 28:41Andrew Santino?

  I, I, I've, I've never enjoyed them. I had them like, I remember like when Red Bull became a thing. Because Bobby drinks them, oh, I don't know, what do we give him, three a day, four a day, something like that, on the show? Yeah.

• 28:50Speaker 06

  What do we give him? He's a bottle?

• 28:52Andrew Santino?

  He is, yeah. We do, we have to feed him. Brother, if we don't remind him to eat food, he will forget. Sometimes we'll do the show, it'll be 9:00 PM. And he's like, I haven't eaten all day. I'm like, do we need to call you to tell you to fucking eat food?

• 29:04Speaker 06

  Sneak food into his energy drinks?

• 29:05Andrew Santino?

  You do. You need to like shimmy it towards him to go, you should have some. But he drinks those like crazy. I keep telling him, you're gonna get, you're gonna get stones or something, or, or something's gonna upset in your stomach because it's, you're not, there's no water. It's just all acidic bullshit, but...

• 29:20Speaker 05

  The caffeine, I've never been able to do caffeine.

• 29:22Andrew Santino?

  What, no coffee?

• 29:23Speaker 05

  No, no, I don't do coffee. I don't do soda. I don't do...

• 29:26Andrew Santino?

  Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. No soda?

• 29:29Speaker 05

  No soda.

• 29:30Andrew Santino?

  You go to the movie theater and popcorn and no soda?

• 29:31Speaker 05

  Nope.

• 29:32Andrew Santino?

  What do you have with popcorn?

• 29:33Speaker 05

  Water.

• 29:33Andrew Santino?

  Water?

• 29:34Speaker 05

  I just.

• 29:34Andrew Santino?

  Your dad would be proud.

• 29:35Speaker 05

  Yeah, yeah. Well, I guess he didn't notice it's how my mom raised us. All we ever drank was water.

• 29:40Andrew Santino?

  Water? No, no soda ever?

• 29:42Speaker 05

  I, it's not even like, with the soda, it's not the caffeine. Water, I can't, I'm sorry, with coffee, I can't drink the caffeine. I get jittery and all that shit. Soda, I just don't like the feeling of like, liquid sugar on my teeth.

• 29:52Andrew Santino?

  Right, well, it's disgusting, but it's so good.

• 29:55Speaker 06

  It's the main reason to go to the movies.

• 29:57Andrew Santino?

  A hundred percent, dude, I couldn't agree, I couldn't agree more. Popcorn and soda and snacks are the thing I like, I look forward to almost as much as the film.

• 30:04Speaker 06

  Yeah, it's almost, it makes me go to the movies less. Because like, if I'm gonna go to the movies, I'm gonna get a huge popcorn soda candy.

• 30:11Andrew Santino?

  Yes, yes.

• 30:12Speaker 06

  And it's like, like, what, I'm gonna sit there and fucking watch the movie like some schmuck? No, I'm there to pig out. And it's like, I can't go to three movies a week, otherwise I'm gonna get fucking fat.

• 30:20Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it's dangerous, dude. But a water with popcorn, I gotta be honest with you, I lost just a little bit of respect for you just now. Just because that seems diabolical. That's diabol- what about with pizza?

• 30:29Speaker 05

  But I, I'm also.

• 30:30Andrew Santino?

  Pizza, you don't have a Coke with pizza?

• 30:32Speaker 05

  No.

• 30:32Andrew Santino?

  Brother, brother, brother. I don't even understand you right now.

• 30:35Speaker 05

  I feel bad, like, I feel like I'm not doing it right, but I can't, I don't know, I just.

• 30:39Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, we're really pissed off, yeah. We're not happy with this. But I look forward to, like, if I'm, if I'm going to get, uh, like, a good slice of pizza, I look forward to the Coke, the Mexican Coke, Coke in a bottle, as much as the pizza itself.

• 30:53Speaker 05

  Really?

• 30:53Andrew Santino?

  You know, the pairing is literally perfect. It's, it's as if they engineered it specifically for pizza, popcorn, burger, Coke is like, held on high.

• 31:01Speaker 05

  This is, this makes a lot of sense.

• 31:02Andrew Santino?

  You don't eat fast food?

• 31:04Speaker 05

  I don't not eat fast food, I don't really eat it so much anymore, but I, I eat fast food.

• 31:07Andrew Santino?

  If you're gonna rip a McDonald's order, what is the, what is the fast food you will eat?

• 31:10Speaker 05

  I'll, I'll eat any fast food. I don't eat it very often, but I, I'll.

• 31:13Andrew Santino?

  You don't have a favorite?

• 31:14Speaker 05

  Um, Wendy's probably, like, Wendy's spicy chicken.

• 31:17Andrew Santino?

  McDonald's, and if you do, you gotta get a Coke.

• 31:19Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 31:19Andrew Santino?

  McDonald's, Dr. Pepper, oh, the DP.

• 31:22Speaker 06

  So let me ask you, where, where do you stand on diet Coke?

• 31:25Andrew Santino?

  You know, I'll have Diet Coke if I'm out at the bar and I'm not drinking. Like, I've been supplementing it by just having like a Diet Coke instead of having like beers or drinks with people. And I do that only because I don't want all the sugar in regular Coke. But I know you can only have like one, because after that, it's like, what are we talking about?

• 31:41Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 31:42Andrew Santino?

  It kind of cancels, that's, well, there's no sugar. It's like, but you had five Diet Cokes.

• 31:46Speaker 06

  I, I made it my New Year's resolution this year to start liking Diet Coke. Because I was getting sick and tired of everyone talking about how much they liked it and being like, my little sip of happiness. So I drank it every day until I liked it. It took 27 days for me to become fully addicted to Diet Coke.

• 32:00Andrew Santino?

  So now you're in.

• 32:01Speaker 06

  Now I crave it like every day.

• 32:04Andrew Santino?

  Addiction works, dude.

• 32:05Speaker 06

  Like, it's like, if you want to know how long it takes the chemicals to overtake your body, it's about 27 days.

• 32:10Andrew Santino?

  Well, what about Coke Zero? Are you into this?

• 32:12Speaker 06

  I, I, I didn't, didn't, I didn't try it.

• 32:15Andrew Santino?

  So the Europeans prefer Coke Zero over Diet Coke. So when you ask for a Diet Coke, because we went to Europe three times on tour this year, and when you ask for a fucking Diet Coke, they're like Coke Zero. And you're like, well, do you have Diet Coke? They're like, yeah, but you don't want Coke Zero? I'm like, no, we like Diet Coke, they like Coke Zero.

• 32:31Speaker 05

  Really?

• 32:32Andrew Santino?

  Coke Zero tastes more like fake Coca-Cola. Diet Coke has its own.

• 32:37Speaker 05

  I see, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 32:38Andrew Santino?

  She's her own girl.

• 32:39Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 32:40Andrew Santino?

  She's independent, dude. Coke Zero is trying to be a hot girl, and she's just not it. Diet Coke is like, she's got tattoos. She'll go out at night alone.

• 32:51Speaker 05

  She was the maître d' today at lunch.

• 32:53Andrew Santino?

  She does whatever she wants, and you can't tell her shit. She's a boss bitch. Coke Zero's a fucking phony. No, I, I need to quit it. I need to quit because soda is probably my, my worst vice. But it's something I don't think I can ever let go.

• 33:06Speaker 05

  Honestly, until this conversation, I don't know if you guys have seen the commercial about like Pepsi and a pizza or whatever. There's a commercial that goes around of like.

• 33:13Andrew Santino?

  Nice try, Pepsi.

• 33:14Speaker 05

  It's like Domino's people delivering, and then Pepsi pulls up right after it. And I was always like, no one drinks Pepsi with pizza?

• 33:23Andrew Santino?

  This is a disappointing.

• 33:24Speaker 06

  Well, are you serious?

• 33:25Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 33:26Andrew Santino?

  You're a Pepsi guy?

• 33:27Speaker 06

  No, no, no. But are you saying specifically Pepsi or soda in general?

• 33:29Speaker 05

  I didn't know like soda with pizza was a thing.

• 33:31Speaker 06

  I mean, that's.

• 33:33Andrew Santino?

  You guys should switch chairs. I can't, I don't want to be this close to you, dude.

• 33:37Andrew Santino?

  Soda with pizza.

• 33:38Speaker 06

  What about when you're a kid and you go to a pizza party?

• 33:39Andrew Santino?

  Correct.

• 33:40Speaker 06

  It's literally just little pizza slices and soda.

• 33:43Speaker 05

  Eating pizza and being in a playpen isn't a thing either. I just thought that was a little bit.

• 33:48Andrew Santino?

  We're not okay with this? We gotta stop going to that McDonald's Play Place.

• 33:53Speaker 05

  You're having a good Saturday night, it's a thing.

• 33:56Andrew Santino?

  No dude, when you were a kid at a pizza party, you drank, you had pizza and Coke.

• 33:58Speaker 05

  For sure.

• 33:59Andrew Santino?

  And that didn't carry over in adulthood.

• 34:00Speaker 05

  Mm-mm.

• 34:01Andrew Santino?

  Good for you.

• 34:01Speaker 05

  Yeah, no, I'm, I guess I'm proud of myself.

• 34:03Speaker 06

  I don't think pizzerias even sell water.

• 34:06Speaker 05

  They just sell soda.

• 34:08Andrew Santino?

  They're like, water for your hands to wash.

• 34:09Speaker 05

  Usually I just ask for it, and they ask for water, they just spit in my mouth.

• 34:13Andrew Santino?

  That's sexy. Alright, I wanna give you one quote real fast, you just reminded me of when I did take a couple of photos. I'm trying to enjoy the moment, not do the photograph thing, but in the Churchill Museum, the one photo I did take that I loved was, um... He had a couple of, there was a couple of great quotes on the wall.

• 34:31Speaker 05

  Oh, I see.

• 34:31Andrew Santino?

  Well, this one was, well, hold on, hold on. That was an Oscar Wilde quote that he had written. Oh, this is a wonderful quote. And I want, dude, I wanted to put this on something, I almost texted this to you, because this is like one of those, uh, art nerd film things to write before the movie star, or the television show begins, you know, like where it's a quote? And it said, Churchill, "We are all worms, but I do believe that I am a glow worm." And I was like, "You fucking bad motherfucker, dude." "You bad motherfuckers, dude."

• 34:58Speaker 05

  That's a great quote.

• 34:59Andrew Santino?

  "We're all worms, but I do believe that I am a glow worm." Very ambitious, being a member of Parliament, it was not enough for him. And he, so his whole thing was like, he was one of the fastest to, uh, ascend, you know, in, in Parliament. And, and I think the way he did it was also, he kinda was so cocky, uh, that he kinda changed the rules. I mean, you learned a lot about him. He drank, he drank every lunch. Every lunch he would drink, and then take a nap, and then wake up, and then get right back to work. And it was kind of criticized at the time, that it was like, "I don't know if we should have you drinking na- right now, but let's drink at night." And he's like, "No, I'm going to drink at night, but I'm going to drink at lunch." And I think he did it so, he was a functioning alcoholic.

• 35:41Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 35:41Andrew Santino?

  He did it so well, people were like, "Maybe this is what we should all do." Cause he was a genius about it. And he smoked cigars, but he never smoked. Do you know this?

• 35:49Speaker 05

  No.

• 35:50Andrew Santino?

  Most of the time, he never lit cigars. And if he did light them, he never really inhaled any of the smoke.

• 35:57Speaker 05

  Really?

• 35:57Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, he was a chewer. He was one of those guys that kinda like had it in his. Mouth often.

• 36:00Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 36:01Andrew Santino?

  And enjoyed the idea of an almost burnt out cigar. You didn't read any of this stuff?

• 36:04Speaker 05

  No, I didn't catch.

• 36:05Andrew Santino?

  You to read a little more.

• 36:06Speaker 05

  That one.

• 36:07Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, I was fascinated because I thought the cigars, he died, Google this, but I think he died at like ninety, like he died in unbelievably long for that era. And I thought, how could you drink every day and smoke and then die so late in life? And then there was a whole thing ninety.

• 36:21Speaker 07

  Yeah, ninety.

• 36:22Andrew Santino?

  Ninety years old.

• 36:23Speaker 07

  Wow.

• 36:23Andrew Santino?

  And there was a whole thing about him never really inhale, or even inhaling it in his mouth, because most, obviously you don't inhale in your lungs. But he wouldn't even let the smoke on his mouth. He loved the idea of cigars and the taste of the flavor and the smell more than he liked this this consummate.

• 36:37Speaker 05

  Want to be a man.

• 36:38Andrew Santino?

  He was just a man. He was just a man, a man. A man who looked to be ninety in an era where nobody did. I will die much earlier than that.

• 36:47Speaker 05

  When you're gonna die.

• 36:48Andrew Santino?

  Eighty's kind of my, I think eighty, I can smell eighty.

• 36:50Speaker 05

  Eight zero, yeah?

• 36:51Andrew Santino?

  I think eighty's kind of the number. Right around, yeah, if I make it to eighty one, I'll be bummed.

• 36:55Speaker 06

  I've always had ninety three in my mind for myself.

• 36:57Andrew Santino?

  Well, that's because you're sheltered.

• 36:59Speaker 06

  Yeah. My mom tells me I'm gonna live to ninety three.

• 37:02Andrew Santino?

  You'll live forever, my love.

• 37:04Speaker 05

  I've never pictured myself older than like what I am right now.

• 37:07Andrew Santino?

  Oh, you didn't even think you'd make it here?

• 37:08Speaker 05

  I, I, I've heard.

• 37:09Andrew Santino?

  What, are you Tupac?

• 37:10Speaker 05

  I've pictured myself older, like in my thirties, but I've never been like older than that.

• 37:14Andrew Santino?

  How old do you think you are right now?

• 37:15Speaker 05

  Ah, great question. Um, I was actually talking about Stapi with this recently.

• 37:19Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 37:19Speaker 05

  I used to think I was twenty four. And I was like, until like a couple of years ago, and now I think I'm like sixty.

• 37:26Andrew Santino?

  Oh, you do?

• 37:26Speaker 05

  Yeah, I like, I like kind of came out of being a twenty four year old, and now I'm just like, I'm a grandfather.

• 37:31Andrew Santino?

  I'm perpetually thirty.

• 37:32Speaker 05

  Really?

• 37:33Andrew Santino?

  Thirty for some reason was a magic number for me. It was like one of the greatest birthdays of my life, like the time of my life was there. So in my mind, I'm like, I'm thirty, I've always been thirty, even though I'm forty two, I'm like, no, no, I'm thirty years old.

• 37:44Speaker 05

  Thirty's a kind of the perfect age to be forever.

• 37:46Andrew Santino?

  Because you're just, you're just enough out of your twenties where you are making some money and life isn't as crazy as it was when I was twenty four and I was, you know, eating fucking spaghetti.

• 37:54Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 37:54Andrew Santino?

  At the laundromat every night. Like, that's gone, but then you, you, I wasn't successful in my career where it was like, I was home free, you still had to work.

• 38:02Speaker 05

  Yes.

• 38:03Andrew Santino?

  So it's kind of this like perfect balance of both worlds. Also, my birthday party was.

• 38:06Speaker 06

  You guys are making me look forward to turn thirty.

• 38:08Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it's gonna be huge.

• 38:10Speaker 05

  Thirty, like thirty is the best.

• 38:11Andrew Santino?

  Thirty's a great number.

• 38:12Speaker 05

  You're mature, you're young enough, but you're mature enough to not be totally stupid anymore.

• 38:17Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 38:17Speaker 05

  I think thirty, you can be an age forever.

• 38:19Andrew Santino?

  You're edging into adulthood, but if someone was like, an older person's like, how old are you? And you're like, thirty, they're like, you kids.

• 38:24Speaker 05

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 38:25Andrew Santino?

  It's great. Once you get into your forties, people are like, you got a 401K? You got a life insurance policy? You're like, I do! And it's sad that I have one of those fucking things. When's your thirtieth?

• 38:35Speaker 06

  April 29th.

• 38:36Andrew Santino?

  What are we, what are we doing? Oh, you just had your golden birthday. What am I, a fucking astrology girl? You just had the golden birthday, it's a big deal. Did you do something for it, or no?

• 38:45Speaker 06

  No, I actually went to go see a play. It was like the fifth play I've ever seen. I saw the, what is it? The Bill Burr, one Bill Burr.

• 38:51Andrew Santino?

  Oh, Glenn Gary Glenn Rock. Did you like it?

• 38:53Speaker 06

  It was pretty good.

• 38:55Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 38:55Speaker 06

  Like, it was.

• 38:56Andrew Santino?

  That's a no. You can say no.

• 38:57Speaker 06

  No, I liked.

• 38:58Andrew Santino?

  He's not here. Bill! Bill, get in here.

• 39:02Speaker 06

  I, I just thought it was gonna be like, longer or something. I, I don't know what I was expecting, like, cause it, it's like two, it's like two sets the whole time. And I was like, oh, surely more is gonna happen.

• 39:13Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 39:13Speaker 06

  But, I do like, you were sort of saying like, before about how you like watching live sports. For me, this is maybe sick, but one thing I like about Broadway shows is that they could mess up.

• 39:23Andrew Santino?

  Ah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 39:24Speaker 06

  Like, you go see a movie, you watch a TV show, you know it's a, a clean product. Like, seeing a live play to me is like, maybe someone's gonna miss their line.

• 39:32Andrew Santino?

  That is cool. Well, that is, that is like all, that's just like sports too. You're like, who is gonna fuck up and who's gonna become a hero?

• 39:38Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 39:39Andrew Santino?

  Who's gonna shine?

• 39:39Speaker 05

  Who might gonna tap on it?

• 39:40Andrew Santino?

  Right, right. Dude, that's, that's actually very interesting, the element of fuck up. It's kinda why, like, I do stand, we do stand-up, is like, stand-up live is better than anything taped ever, forever. Filmed specials are great, taped stand-up is good, but it'll never feel the same. Soder once said that. He's like, yeah, cause you're, you're getting it live out of the tap, you're getting it right from the tap.

• 40:00Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 40:00Andrew Santino?

  When it's unfiltered, it's like podcasts, you're getting it from the tap, versus like, packaged performances, it, there's so much surrounding it, that it kind of takes the.

• 40:09Speaker 06

  Yeah, it's less raw.

• 40:10Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it's just not as, oh, what the fuck was that? You're never gonna get any of that.

• 40:14Speaker 05

  When you, when you do your special, when you film it, um, light noise, like, was that, when you, when you're filming?

• 40:20Andrew Santino?

  filming a special, are you sick of that material?

• 40:22Speaker 05

  Like is that?

• 40:22Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah.

• 40:23Speaker 05

  Is that when you're done with it?

• 40:23Andrew Santino?

  Me in particular, I don't know how other people feel about it. Yeah, you hate it. You're like, you're almost, sometimes when you tell it, you're like, fuck you. Like, as you say the joke, you're like, shut up.

• 40:32Speaker 05

  Start heckling yourself.

• 40:34Andrew Santino?

  Like, after you say it, you wanna be like, boo! Yeah, comedy is such a fickle thing anyway. When you first find a joke, it's like the most beautiful feeling in the world. And then, and then, as you do it and perfect it, quote unquote, or get through it, you do start to like, it's, yeah. You know what I re-quote it to is like, when you first meet a girl that you're like, super into, and you start to see a different side of her, and then you're like, I don't really like that she does that at all. Like, that really bothers me. And then by the end, you're like, we should break up. Not shooting a special.

• 41:04Speaker 05

  I used to like seeing like, people in the crowd laughing like, hard, you're like, I didn't want you to laugh like that.

• 41:08Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, yeah. Well, the funny thing that happens when you do anything, and even like, like your show, there's things that you think they're gonna like as much as you like it, and it turns out they like the other thing more, and you're like, why did you like that?

• 41:21Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 41:22Andrew Santino?

  You didn't like the thing that I thought was fucking awesome? Yeah. That's the hardest part is, is letting go of, um, of all, in all creative stuff. Letting go of the idea that they're gonna like it the way you like it. And once you get over that hump mentally, it starts to be more freeing for creating shit, because you go, fuck it, what, I just, I, they might like this, they might not, or they might like this as much as this other thing, but I can't care. I used to care so much, and then you just don't care anymore, because you're like, whatever dude, I'm just gonna keep making shit, and hopefully you'll like it, and if not, I'll make more shit.

• 41:53Speaker 05

  Do you care that, like?

• 41:55Speaker 06

  That's gonna stick with me.

• 41:56Andrew Santino?

  I hope it does. Well, because your twenties in creating, for me, was like, young comedy, it's a fucking nightmare. It's a weird, emotional grind, and then you put yourself against yourself all the time, and then you grow old enough to go, alright dude, I don't fuck it, I know I'm good at it, I've lasted this long. I can't dictate what you're gonna like. I'll just tell you what I think is good. And then, you know, Louis talked heavily about that, about like bombing incessantly when you go, when you're with new shit. But he's like, I don't, that doesn't, I don't care. Yeah. I'm figuring out if I like it. Right. You, you're gonna, you're gonna take your own path. But I'm figuring out if I like it. And then if you, and if we both like it, then it's, then it's perfect. Then we, yeah. But, you know, there's shit that we were, we were test, Bob tested out a couple of new jokes to Louis.

• 42:38Andrew Santino?

  And we were trying to do, you know, like, just like random thoughts of like what might work. Mm-hmm. And it is funny what clicks in your mind versus what clicks to other people. Unless you, unless it's just a perfect joke. Yeah. Unless, unless it's like anything Norm's ever said. Where you're like, oh, that's just like the perfect fucking joke. But that's, that's, that's, I think the lesson in all this shit is like, we'll figure, we'll see. That's why it's great to see live shit, cause you're like, what is gonna come out of this fucking nonsense?

• 43:04Speaker 03

  In here, we pour whiskey.

• 43:07Andrew Santino?

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• 43:49Andrew Santino?

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• 44:33Andrew Santino?

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• 45:18Andrew Santino?

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• 45:57Speaker 05

  When you're doing like a show, like with Dave or something like that?

• 46:00Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 46:00Speaker 05

  Are you, if a lot of people like it, are you happy? Are you like, no, that was the good joke?

• 46:05Andrew Santino?

  No, I don't care about that anymore. I just want it to be, I just want the total package to be nice. I want the whole thing to go like, oh, that was a good. By the way, I got a compliment the other day from, uh, black dudes are the best fans of, like, of anything. But this black dude was just like, "Man, that shit was so motherfucking funny, man." I was like, "Thank you so much." And then all these other whites were watching me get praised by this man in line. And it just does something to you. You see that, whites? You see how he handled that? He was so nice and cool about it.

• 46:40Speaker 05

  It can be done, people.

• 46:41Andrew Santino?

  Yes, it can be done. No, yeah, that, I don't care about that anymore, about like, what it... You just want the whole thing to feel good. Like, I don't have the ego of like, "Why didn't I get more lines?" Or, "Why didn't I..." I don't fucking give a shit about that.

• 46:53Speaker 05

  I never understood how that happened. Like, I, I, I don't understand how people are like, "I want more lines." Like, what's gonna mess up the show? That's not how the show goes. Why would you have more lines?

• 47:02Andrew Santino?

  Ego is hard, you know, like, you, how long have you guys been working together?

• 47:06Speaker 05

  I mean, a long time, but like, only like, closely like, a year.

• 47:09Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah, it's coming. Right, dude, it's coming, this whole fucking like...

• 47:13Speaker 05

  "Oh, why do you like that? Maybe we should..."

• 47:16Speaker 06

  Now, here's the thing, both me and Jai, like, we're terrified of other people being mad at us.

• 47:21Andrew Santino?

  You're scared of that, right?

• 47:22Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, so we'll avoid a confrontation at all.

• 47:25Andrew Santino?

  People pleasers at, at the highest level.

• 47:27Speaker 05

  At the highest level. All I care about is making you happy.

• 47:30Andrew Santino?

  It's good, but it's also very toxic, yeah, that's all.

• 47:31Speaker 06

  We were in the Uber over here and I said, "I think he's gonna get mad at me."

• 47:35Speaker 05

  No way!

• 47:36Speaker 06

  I was like, "I don't know what's gonna happen, but I'm gonna get cancelled, 'cause he's just gonna get really mad at me over something."

• 47:41Andrew Santino?

  You're a sweetheart.

• 47:42Speaker 06

  We thought he was gonna get cancelled for being boring on the way.

• 47:45Andrew Santino?

  No chance. You're a Long Island sweetheart.

• 47:48Speaker 06

  "America's sweetheart" is something I dubbed myself recently.

• 47:50Andrew Santino?

  You're America's sweetheart?

• 47:51Speaker 06

  I did a reality show at Barstool and I started calling myself "America's sweetheart", and it caught on a little bit.

• 47:56Andrew Santino?

  It didn't backfire at all?

• 47:57Speaker 06

  Didn't backfire, actually, no. Made a t-shirt myself.

• 48:01Andrew Santino?

  And how are those selling?

• 48:02Speaker 06

  I didn't, I didn't even attempt to sell it, I just wore it off Amazon.

• 48:05Andrew Santino?

  That's so funny, he's so scared of adoration and hate, that he's like, "We won't even sell the merch." Just build merch for yourself. It's actually pretty fucking brilliant, dude.

• 48:15Speaker 06

  This one's just for me.

• 48:16Andrew Santino?

  That's actually a very smart idea, just to make merch for us and not sell it, we should do that.

• 48:21Speaker 05

  Make them want it even bad, more.

• 48:23Andrew Santino?

  But then never give it to them. That unrequited merch love that we all have. Yeah, the, the world of not making anybody upset, or hoping that people like what you are putting out...

• 48:35Andrew Santino?

  It all goes away once you fucking, it's just you stop caring.

• 48:38Speaker 05

  Oh, I'm, I've fully stopped caring.

• 48:39Andrew Santino?

  You don't care.

• 48:40Speaker 05

  I don't, I don't give a single fuck.

• 48:42Andrew Santino?

  It's really hard. You still give a fuck.

• 48:44Speaker 06

  Oh, I care. But I care like, I get out of an Uber and I'm like, I hope that driver likes me.

• 48:48Andrew Santino?

  Did this guy like you who just drove you guys?

• 48:50Speaker 06

  No, no, he didn't really care for us. I don't think Uber drivers ever like when people are talking in the backseat.

• 48:56Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 48:56Speaker 06

  You know, like, you don't wanna hear.

• 48:57Andrew Santino?

  But are you guys chatty with the Uber driver? What kind of Uber passenger are you? Are you a chatty guy?

• 49:01Speaker 06

  No, usually no. I've had like, I do feel like maybe once a year, you get like a heart to heart with an Uber driver. And you remember that, but for the most part, especially if I'm alone, I'm just, my headphones are in, we're not talking.

• 49:12Andrew Santino?

  I've had a couple of really good heart to hearts.

• 49:14Speaker 05

  I do, I, I let them dictate it. If they, if they wanna start being talkative, I'll talk. I don't, I don't start it. But I, I very much enjoy talking to Uber drivers.

• 49:22Andrew Santino?

  It is fun when you get put in a position where you get to play a character. I oftentimes will make up just an entire world view. You know, like I'll do, what do you do? It's like, oh, I'm in tech.

• 49:31Speaker 05

  Oh, you go full, full made up?

• 49:33Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, why not? That's a time to be, I get to be, that's my little play in the back of that car. I get to just become something that I'm not. I do, I used to do it on airplanes a lot, cause I didn't wanna tell people that I'm a comedian. Because of like sheer self hatred and embarrassment, you know? Uh, and so now I'm a little bit more known, so a lot of times people will know already maybe. But that used to be a fun game when someone, the best part about an Uber is they can't really see you.

• 49:56Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 49:56Andrew Santino?

  And my name is not my name on my profile. And it's not my photo either. So I get, they don't really see you get in. They see you get in and then they don't think much of it. So most of the time, I still get to play that fun little game.

• 50:06Speaker 05

  Do you get that feeling acting?

• 50:09Andrew Santino?

  Hmm.

• 50:10Speaker 05

  Cause I, that, that's like, I think why I like acting. I feel exactly what you're talking about.

• 50:14Andrew Santino?

  Sometimes, but acting is so, is so, um, coordinated and laborious. I mean, you do the fucking take after take after take after take. So that kind of wanes sometimes of the, of the like, the fantasy of it all.

• 50:26Speaker 05

  Hmm.

• 50:26Andrew Santino?

  But this is great, cause it's live, it's one shot. You know what I mean? Like, this is.

• 50:29Speaker 06

  You could mess up.

• 50:30Andrew Santino?

  You could mess up. And you do.

• 50:32Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 50:32Andrew Santino?

  I thought you said you were in tech.

• 50:36Andrew Santino?

  Roll, roll, open the door. But I do, I do get to play characters a lot in the car. I do love that.

• 50:42Speaker 06

  Yeah, lying is just fucked.

• 50:44Andrew Santino?

  But none of it. Harmful, it's always like fun, like I get to pretend to be somebody else. Because that's more interesting in my mind than saying I'm a comedian.

• 50:51Speaker 05

  For sure.

• 50:52Andrew Santino?

  Ironically, I'm sure they would like to know the stories of a comedian.

• 50:54Speaker 05

  Right.

• 50:55Andrew Santino?

  But I'm like, nah, it's cooler to be, it's cooler to be Jim from fucking, you know, Westlake Village and my wife just left me and my kid, you know, my kid got a full ride scholarship for water polo. It's fun to be that guy. That's way more fun.

• 51:08Speaker 05

  That Uber driver is much more happy to be talking to Jim rather than Andrew Santino.

• 51:12Andrew Santino?

  Fucking comic, some loser comedian.

• 51:16Andrew Santino?

  But the, but, but, but then now.

• 51:17Speaker 05

  Caesar special, like wow, Jim's doing pretty well.

• 51:20Andrew Santino?

  After that divorce, this guy.

• 51:22Speaker 05

  Changed his name and everything.

• 51:24Andrew Santino?

  His wife is like, no, that's Andrew Santino. He's like, that's his pseudonym. I met Jim, he's a tech guy from Westlake Village. I think you get, and then you give them something to have fun with because then I also play into, I will be very agreeable and play into their reality.

• 51:36Speaker 05

  Oh, yes.

• 51:37Andrew Santino?

  So if they say something out of pocket, you have to go along with it. You can't disagree with them. You're in their car.

• 51:41Speaker 05

  Oh, yeah.

• 51:42Andrew Santino?

  So if they're like, yeah, dude, we gotta get all these fucking immigrants out and you're like, right on, brother, let's fucking round them up. Like, open the trunk, let's round up. Like, you have to go with their madness. Cause you're like, I'm in this guy's car.

• 51:52Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 51:53Andrew Santino?

  I can't, this guy could kill us. The idea that we're in a stranger's car and if he snapped, could just, what was the movie? What happened to Aunt Diane or whatever? Remember when she was driving with her, her, she, look at that movie, whatever happened to Aunt something? She was driving with her niece and nephew and in a moment of sheer whatever-ism, fucking crashed the car. And they, she was sober, what is it?

• 52:16Speaker 05

  There's something wrong with Aunt Diane.

• 52:17Andrew Santino?

  Something wrong with Aunt Diane. And they tested her blood, they did, they did, she had no psychoanalysis that would prove that she had mental issues. They, they were like, this is a anomaly that she literally just snapped one day out of the blue.

• 52:31Speaker 05

  Really?

• 52:31Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it's fucking crazy. It's, it's a sociological experiment, like you wouldn't believe.

• 52:35Speaker 05

  I'm gonna walk to the airport tonight.

• 52:37Andrew Santino?

  Take a walk.

• 52:38Speaker 05

  That reminds me of.

• 52:38Andrew Santino?

  It's only 38 miles, 35, yeah.

• 52:40Speaker 05

  Louis' joke about, uh, girls go cra- girl, was it Girls Gone?

• 52:44Andrew Santino?

  Girls Gone Wild.

• 52:45Speaker 05

  Girls Gone Wild. And then it can't be Women Gone Wild, cause when women go wild, they just drown kids in the tub.

• 52:51Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, they, they kill, kill men.

• 52:52Speaker 05

  Kill men.

• 52:53Andrew Santino?

  And drown their kids in the tub. By the way, Girls Gone Wild, shout out Girls Gone Wild, University of Colorado, go Buffs. One of my favorite times of my life was meeting a girl at a bar who was on Girls Gone Wild.

• 53:03Speaker 05

  Really?

• 53:04Andrew Santino?

  And she took me home. Pretty great, dude.

• 53:07Speaker 05

  Wild.

• 53:08Andrew Santino?

  It was a bummer, to be honest.

• 53:09Speaker 05

  It was a bummer.

• 53:10Andrew Santino?

  It was actually a bummer. She was not really fun.

• 53:12Speaker 05

  She was better on the show.

• 53:13Speaker 06

  I kinda looked down on the Girls Gone Wild, you know, it's amateur smoke show shit.

• 53:16Andrew Santino?

  Right. Well, for someone of your status, the way that you get to judge.

• 53:20Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 53:21Andrew Santino?

  We're mere peasants. We're cowering.

• 53:23Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 53:24Andrew Santino?

  Where did you go to college?

• 53:25Speaker 06

  Fordham, in the Bronx.

• 53:26Andrew Santino?

  In the Bronx, yeah, where'd you go?

• 53:27Speaker 05

  I went a little bit everywhere. I didn't graduate.

• 53:29Andrew Santino?

  I love this story. This is good. How many schools did you go to?

• 53:33Speaker 05

  It depends what you're counting and what you don't.

• 53:35Andrew Santino?

  Community college?

• 53:36Speaker 05

  Uh, no community college. I went to probably seven, probably seven colleges.

• 53:40Andrew Santino?

  Seven?

• 53:40Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 53:41Andrew Santino?

  Figuring it out, huh?

• 53:43Speaker 06

  One semester.

• 53:44Andrew Santino?

  Seven's a lot.

• 53:44Speaker 05

  Seven's a lot. But like, that's counting, like, I studied abroad in high school. So I technically went to University of Rhode Island, but I was in high school at the time.

• 53:52Andrew Santino?

  Where'd you go study abroad in high school?

• 53:53Speaker 05

  Uh, Universidad de Salamanca.

• 53:56Andrew Santino?

  God, I didn't even know that's a real thing. Where's Salamanca?

• 53:58Speaker 05

  Uh, like, two hours west of Madrid, I believe. It's in Spain.

• 54:02Andrew Santino?

  Spain's the best.

• 54:03Speaker 05

  It was the fucking...

• 54:04Andrew Santino?

  I like how you thought that I wouldn't know where Madrid is. That was very...

• 54:06Speaker 05

  No, I knew.

• 54:07Andrew Santino?

  Sharp attack on this one.

• 54:08Speaker 05

  When I saw you in London, I think you'd just come from Madrid.

• 54:11Andrew Santino?

  We were in, well, no, flew out of Madrid, but yeah, we were in Valderrama.

• 54:14Speaker 05

  Ah, okay. You were in the boss country.

• 54:16Andrew Santino?

  We were down, yeah, we were down in, uh, Malaga. Malaga.

• 54:20Speaker 05

  Malaga.

• 54:20Andrew Santino?

  By the way, the day I took off, they had a terrible earthquake. And so we landed in London and people were like, oof, was everything okay? And I was like, it was a great flight. And they were like, do you not know, they just had an earthquake on the coast. I was like, oh, fuck.

• 54:33Speaker 05

  Didn't get up to 30,000 feet.

• 54:34Andrew Santino?

  Didn't bother me in the sky. Didn't feel a fucking thing. This is a big issue with my wife, by the way. We're about to fly somewhere and she's looking at the weather a week and a half in advance to find out how the winds are. And I'm like, babe, and if we go, we go.

• 54:48Speaker 05

  If we go, we go.

• 54:49Andrew Santino?

  We go.

• 54:49Speaker 05

  Are you like, I don't look up weather, I don't look up, I'm...

• 54:52Andrew Santino?

  I couldn't fucking care less. It's whatever. It is, it's gonna happen.

• 54:55Speaker 05

  What's gonna happen's gonna happen. And I'd like to be there for it.

• 54:57Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it's, um...

• 55:00Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, I don't, I just don't, I don't know, I, I think I got a piece of, of like, a, a piece of me let that go when I first started touring because I got, I had enough shitty flights of terrible weather. Where once you go through a few that are just atrocious, you're like, alright, that's fine.

• 55:15Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 55:16Andrew Santino?

  Like, I had the, the most famous one, I've told this dumb story, but I was in Indianapolis Airport and I was flying back to, I was either going to New York, I was, it was a short, short flight, not a long flight, but like an hour and a half, an hour. And the weather was atrocious and it was fucking, I mean, like the wind, you can see, when the rain changes directions, you're like, that's fucking weird. It went that way, then it went that way.

• 55:38Speaker 06

  That seems like a problem.

• 55:39Andrew Santino?

  Oh dude, and you could see out the window and I'm waiting there and everyone's a little bit panicked, you could tell, they kept delaying the flight, they're like, we're gonna delay for the weather, we're gonna hold, it's gonna get easier, and it didn't get any easier. And finally they were like, we, we do have to take off, if we're gonna go, the fl, the plane will go tonight. So they finally brought us on this little thing and it's a little puddle jumper, you know, like a one-seat, two-seat. And, uh, I was really fucked up, dude, it was bad, the takeoff was this way, you know, it was one of those where I'm like, woo, fuck, you know? And we get up there and it's real wobbly and everyone's kind of white knuckling, like everyone, you could tell, that, you can feel, there's no noise, but you can feel people's like.

• 56:10Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 56:11Andrew Santino?

  You can feel that, and I look over my right-hand shoulder and Bobby Knight, uh, is sitting there, reading a newspaper, cross-legged, as if it's Sunday morning.

• 56:22Speaker 06

  You mean Indiana basketball coach Bobby Knight?

• 56:24Andrew Santino?

  Not Bo, and this, dude, this, not bothering, not bothering him. It doesn't even, he, it's like as if, you know, like he's at a boat at sea, you know what I mean, like, yeah, yeah, a couple of waves. And I thought, God's not gonna take Bobby Knight.

• 56:40Speaker 06

  No, not like this.

• 56:41Andrew Santino?

  Not like this, I was, I was like, we're fucking, we're going to New York. And by the way, it did give me a weird peace of mind to Bobby Knight, it just made me think, he already is old enough to go, what, what are you gonna do? You gonna get up there and fucking, just let it go, they'll fly it, they'll be fine.

• 56:54Speaker 06

  I'll do that, I'll eye up, I, I actually don't really get nervous to fly, but when I used to, I would eye up the plane and be like, does this look like, you know, front new, like, people that would be on the front page of a newspaper?

• 57:04Andrew Santino?

  Is this a plane that crashes?

• 57:06Speaker 05

  Yeah. Do these look like plane crash people or not?

• 57:09Andrew Santino?

  See, what I do is I go to the window like a child. You know, the kid, there's always a kid at the window staring out at the plane. I'm that guy. I'm looking at the ground crew. I'm like, how, how much of their jobs are they doing? Like, if, if you see them go under and do one of these things, I'm okay. Cause if they're looking, you sometimes you see guys get under, they throw the base at the wheel and then they go. One of those, you're like, check it though. Grab the wheel and shake it. I wanna, just check it a little, cause I had two touch, touch and goes. Have you ever had those?

• 57:35Speaker 05

  No, we, they couldn't do the land. I've had like nothing but great flights.

• 57:38Andrew Santino?

  Touch and goes are really scary. Touch and goes, we, we got all the way down and then they hit and then they gotta go back up again. Cause it's just not stable enough to land. And that one, I was texting my wife going, I'm just letting you know, I'm not scared of crashing, but we might come home. Cause it was Vegas. And I was like, they might go back to LA. Cause it was, we couldn't, the wind was fucking insane. Sometimes the heat in the desert is so bad, if it gets over like 103, 104, these heat winds, they're these ju, big pocket jumps that you go through. And I was like, we might end up back at Burbank.

• 58:08Speaker 05

  The heat winds, that's when you like feel the plane drop?

• 58:10Andrew Santino?

  Oh, well, cause the, the, the, the, the, he can look it up. It gets so hot. And when the wind is heavy in these desert windstorms that they have, when it's so fucking hot, I think it just changes the lift pattern of it. So you get these massive pocket drops and you'll have like really unstable moments because of the, it's the heat and the wind combined. And they were telling us it's gonna be bad on the way in, but this was like, holy fuck.

• 58:35Speaker 05

  That makes, I, I've only ever had like one of those big drops in Florida. So like that makes sense that it's the heat type deal.

• 58:41Andrew Santino?

  It's gotta be something to do with the humidity and the, I mean, look, I don't, I don't understand lift as much as I should.

• 58:47Speaker 05

  All, all you need to know is lift. That's all anyone knows apparently. It's fucking lift.

• 58:50Andrew Santino?

  You gotta go out to go up to go down. Don't worry about it.

• 58:54Speaker 00

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• 59:24Speaker 01

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• 59:54Speaker 06

  People love saying the Jell-O analogy, too. When you have a turbulence, like, oh, it's just like you're being stuck in gel. What the fuck does that mean? Doesn't make me feel any better.

• 1:00:02Andrew Santino?

  If you shook the Jell-O hard enough, it would flop. You could take it right out of the bowl. It eventually would, at some point. But no, no, I've gotten over that, the hiccup of that in my life. I mean, I think it's, it's an afterthought.

• 1:00:16Speaker 05

  If it's gonna happen, it's gonna, I'm...

• 1:00:18Andrew Santino?

  You're too young to die, though. You should still have a little bit of caution.

• 1:00:20Speaker 05

  See, I think you're right around...

• 1:00:22Speaker 06

  Oh, don't say it.

• 1:00:23Speaker 05

  No, no, no, no, no. But like, I think 30, despite, like, we said earlier where it is the perfect age to kind of be forever. I think 30, like, once you hit 30, you're free to die.

• 1:00:32Speaker 06

  I gotta disagree. I feel like that's, like, you, I feel like a lot of people say that, where they're like, I'm not afraid, like, whatever, like, I'm not afraid. I'm a, put me on the record, I'm afraid to die. I do not want to die. It's literally the worst thing that could happen.

• 1:00:48Andrew Santino?

  It is, it is the worst thing that could happen.

• 1:00:49Speaker 06

  That's it. And people are like, whatever, if it fucking takes me, like, no!

• 1:00:54Speaker 05

  I'm not like, like, there was a time in my life I was eager for it. I'm not eager for it, but I'm not like...

• 1:00:59Andrew Santino?

  You're not scared.

• 1:00:59Speaker 05

  I'm not, like, what's gonna, what am I gonna do to stop it, dude?

• 1:01:02Andrew Santino?

  We just talked earlier about dying in a vulnerable way, though. We always, we want to do a sketch where I had these, uh... Do you know normatech? Do you know what those are?

• 1:01:11Speaker 05

  No.

• 1:01:12Andrew Santino?

  They're like leg sleeves that you put on, they fill up with air, right? And I got these as a gift for when I had my, when I was injured and I was, I was like, oh, the pressure relief in your legs feels great. They fill up with air. They're big, puffy, it's stupid.

• 1:01:25Speaker 05

  You've seen like LeBron wear them?

• 1:01:26Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, they love them. But I do them at the house at night and I was, I was talking to my wife about how funny it would be if somebody broke in and robbed me with like these air puff leg. And we were thinking about all the vulnerable ways to die where like this, I understand the ideas like, I'm not okay to die. I just know if it happens, it happens, but I just don't want, there's certain ways where I'm like, don't do it now.

• 1:01:45Speaker 05

  Dude.

• 1:01:46Andrew Santino?

  You know what I mean? Like stepping out of the shower, like come on.

• 1:01:48Speaker 05

  I got one.

• 1:01:49Andrew Santino?

  I don't want to be naked.

• 1:01:49Speaker 06

  Don't be a prick, God.

• 1:01:50Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, yeah. Just kill me regular.

• 1:01:52Speaker 05

  Yeah. One of my schools was Florida State University.

• 1:01:56Andrew Santino?

  Love to hear one of my schools.

• 1:01:58Speaker 05

  And I went to school, I went to Tallahassee and I went down there and I didn't know anybody down there. And I, I do one person, but he already had a roommate. So he hooked me up with like a friend of a friend and we had this dog shit apartment complex called Villa Cortez Apartments.

• 1:02:10Andrew Santino?

  Shout out Villa Cortez.

• 1:02:11Speaker 05

  On Jackson Bluff Road.

• 1:02:12Andrew Santino?

  Still standing, I imagine.

• 1:02:13Speaker 05

  It is. Go look up the reviews of this place. It's not good. And it was this dog shit.

• 1:02:17Andrew Santino?

  I'd like to read a couple of them.

• 1:02:18Speaker 05

  Horrible apartment complex. And I got, I moved in, I bought myself a brand new TV. Threw the TV case box outside, whatever. Two days later, I'm taking a shit. This is 2008, so I'm on my BlackBerry, I'm playing Brick Breaker and I just hear my front door get kicked in.

• 1:02:36Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:02:37Speaker 05

  And I was like, huh, Adam doesn't usually open the door that loud. I'm fucking home! So I get up from Brick Breaker and I have my pants around my ankle still and I waddle to the door. And I peek it open and there were three men in masks in my living room.

• 1:02:51Andrew Santino?

  Oh, come on in.

• 1:02:53Speaker 06

  Wrong, wrong house, guys.

• 1:02:56Speaker 05

  I just locked the door, put it back down, sat down and just like, just sat there. I probably kept playing Brick Breaker. And I was just like, I don't know what these, what these guys are gonna do, but I just hope they don't open this fucking door. And I was, but I was picturing myself getting like, either beaten up on a bowl of my own shit. Or shot or stabbed.

• 1:03:13Andrew Santino?

  Hey guys, let me flush before you kick this shit out. Before you shoot me.

• 1:03:17Speaker 05

  Yeah, you guys can go take whatever the fuck you want, just don't leave.

• 1:03:19Andrew Santino?

  They got the TV, didn't they?

• 1:03:21Speaker 05

  They got the TV and the laptops.

• 1:03:22Andrew Santino?

  Here's the deal.

• 1:03:23Speaker 06

  They just left you like they didn't go.

• 1:03:24Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, they don't, they're not worried about him, but rookie, rookie, rookie move not cutting up that box and putting it up in somebody else's bin.

• 1:03:29Speaker 05

  That's what the cops said when they came. The cops were like, they were like, I didn't even think about it. I was like, they told my new TV and they go, did you leave the box outside? And I was like, yeah, I did. And then they were asking me, it was actually straight out of Superbad too, where they were like, it was a black cop and a white cop and they were like, what color, do you get to look at the guys? And I was like, yeah. And they're like, what uh? And I was like 18, right, filled with white guilt. And I was like, ah.

• 1:03:53Speaker 06

  It's Obama here too.

• 1:03:56Speaker 05

  And then the black cop just goes, kid, did he look like me or you look like him? And I was like, well, they looked like you, sir.

• 1:04:02Andrew Santino?

  That's so funny.

• 1:04:04Speaker 07

  One of my buddies in Chicago got robbed in his apartment and they tied him up with his uh, with his computer cable.

• 1:04:10Andrew Santino?

  Hell, yeah.

• 1:04:11Speaker 05

  Really? Soder, you ever heard of Soder's?

• 1:04:13Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 1:04:13Speaker 05

  Soder, when he was at University of Arizona, right?

• 1:04:16Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, he was at UA, he's one of the loser, ASU guy over here.

• 1:04:19Speaker 05

  You're an ASU guy?

• 1:04:20Speaker 07

  Harvard of the West.

• 1:04:20Speaker 05

  Dude, ASU has my favorite story ever of Dustin Pedroia. When Dustin Pedroia was still at ASU and Barry Bonds came for alumni game. Barry Bonds had no idea who he was. He goes, who are you? He goes, I'm Dustin Pedroia. He points up to the fucking records. He goes, I'm the guy who broke all your records.

• 1:04:39Speaker 07

  To Barry Bonds? Bold move. Bold move, Pedroia.

• 1:04:46Andrew Santino?

  Hey Dustin, how many splash home runs can you hit in fucking San Francisco?

• 1:04:50Speaker 05

  Dude, well, Pedroia, that was why Pedroia was Pedroia. He was such a cocky little fuck.

• 1:04:53Andrew Santino?

  That is pretty badass.

• 1:04:54Speaker 05

  Dude, he had the, he had the same thing in uh, in the 07 World Series after he went deep in game two in Boston. Trying to get into Coors Field for game three. He couldn't get in, he didn't have his press pass or whatever, his credentials. And they went, where are your credentials? He goes, my credentials still bouncing down Mass Ave, get the fuck out of my way.

• 1:05:11Andrew Santino?

  Wow, Pedroia.

• 1:05:13Speaker 05

  He's the best.

• 1:05:13Andrew Santino?

  I kinda like him now.

• 1:05:14Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 1:05:15Speaker 06

  I still, I still hate him, but.

• 1:05:16Andrew Santino?

  Well, he's played Boston.

• 1:05:17Speaker 05

  I'm a Yankee fan.

• 1:05:18Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, I was just gonna say, you have, and I'm so sorry about what's been going on with you right now.

• 1:05:21Speaker 05

  Listen, we got, we got a few games left.

• 1:05:22Andrew Santino?

  Didn't you get your shit pushed in the other night?

• 1:05:24Speaker 05

  Two, two days, two days in a row.

• 1:05:25Andrew Santino?

  12 to?

• 1:05:26Speaker 05

  It was 13, it was uh, 10, 1, 13 to 7. 13-7 was a blowout.

• 1:05:30Speaker 06

  It was a, that was a fake. It was 12-0 and they scored off nobody.

• 1:05:34Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 1:05:34Speaker 06

  God, that sucks.

• 1:05:35Andrew Santino?

  It's okay, it's okay.

• 1:05:36Speaker 06

  Do you Cubs, Cubs fan?

• 1:05:37Andrew Santino?

  I am a Cubs fan and we, we play in a couple hours and you know, look, we don't think that's.

• 1:05:42Speaker 06

  You gave up six runs in the first inning.

• 1:05:43Andrew Santino?

  We sure did, we sure did. Milwaukee's a phenomenal baseball team.

• 1:05:47Speaker 06

  So is Toronto.

• 1:05:48Andrew Santino?

  Toronto's pretty good, although the NL has it this year. I'd be willing to put my name on that. There's so much strength in the NL between Philly, if it's not Philly, if it's not the Dodgers, and it won't be the Cubs. I'm saying that as a self, like, diehard Cubs fan. We just don't have the depth, but Milwaukee is dangerous, but Philly and the Dodgers are fucking unreal. They're both unreal. I mean, the Dodgers are a magician team. That's like, that's like what a kid makes up. You know, when they interview like little league kids, they're like, who are all your favorite players? Like, they're all on the Dodgers.

• 1:06:18Speaker 05

  I, I've never had an MLB the Show team as good as the current Dodgers are.

• 1:06:22Andrew Santino?

  It's, it's, it's actually pretty fucking amazing. They're kind of like what the NBA has started to do where they create super teams.

• 1:06:26Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 1:06:27Andrew Santino?

  But the Dodgers did it pretty organically in the way where they got guys who may have kind of come off of like an okay run somewhere else and they rebirth them again. I mean, Mookie Betts is probably the best acquirement the Dodgers have had in, I don't even know how long. It's just, there's certain times when you go, wow, how do these teams, how, beyond the money, how are they able to really finagle some of these fucking deals to happen?

• 1:06:47Speaker 05

  It's, I kind of think that sometimes with like streamers, like with Netflix, like when they got you. And I'm like, that was already on another channel and no one cared about that.

• 1:06:55Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:06:55Speaker 05

  And then you just did a great job of rehabbing it or whatever the fuck it is.

• 1:06:59Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you just, you stand there, he's gotta throw his cutter more. Yeah. Well, yeah, that four, that four seam dude, that's fucking something to behold. Well, no, the Yankees are, the Yankees are still gonna be, uh, you're gonna still be okay, but I think even if you go through, man, you're gonna have a tough time with those fucking Dodgers. But everybody wants to see Yankees Dodgers.

• 1:07:14Speaker 05

  I'd like to see that.

• 1:07:15Andrew Santino?

  We all want to.

• 1:07:16Speaker 06

  I'd like revenge for last year.

• 1:07:17Andrew Santino?

  We all want to see that because that's, that's, it's the greatest tale in sports is East Coast, West Coast. It's, it's almost like sports wants that as bad as it is happening. It's like, this is what we want to see.

• 1:07:28Speaker 05

  They don't want Brewers Mariners.

• 1:07:30Andrew Santino?

  They really don't, do they? No, they really don't. It is funny when we do get a Super Bowl or a World Series or something of two teams that you go.

• 1:07:37Speaker 05

  There's always a thing of like, well, it'll bring in new fans and new markets will care. Nah, let the coasts play each other. Everyone else shut the fuck up.

• 1:07:47Speaker 06

  I think the Super Bowl, everyone will watch the Super Bowl, but like, baseball, like, I opted out of the Rangers-Diamondbacks. Yeah, 100% ago.

• 1:07:54Speaker 05

  This one's not for me.

• 1:07:56Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, not a real thing. But when it does happen in a Super Bowl, you will still watch, but you're, the interest is different. For some reason, when it's a team, two teams in the Super Bowl, you're like, I don't think anybody likes any of these guys.

• 1:08:06Speaker 05

  When, football in particular, if you're not invested in the sport, invested in the teams, I find it to be a pretty like, not boring sport, but there's a lot of times when I'm like, like watching like a Bengals-Browns game, I'm like, what the?

• 1:08:18Speaker 06

  Oh, but see, I could watch a random NFL game more than I could watch a random game of any other sport.

• 1:08:23Speaker 05

  I, I agree.

• 1:08:24Andrew Santino?

  Interesting.

• 1:08:24Speaker 06

  Like, well, so I put the Yankees as my number one team.

• 1:08:27Andrew Santino?

  Live or TV?

• 1:08:27Speaker 06

  Oh, TV. I would, you'd have to pay me to go to a football game. I hate going to football games. Yeah.

• 1:08:32Andrew Santino?

  I love a good live football game.

• 1:08:33Speaker 05

  I, I, I love a live event of any kind, exactly. Like, if it's live, I want to be there.

• 1:08:37Andrew Santino?

  Baseball's my favorite live sport to go to, but I will watch two teams I literally hate, but I love baseball that much that I do not fucking care. I just love live baseball.

• 1:08:46Speaker 05

  Yeah. Baseball, I can see myself doing that. By the way, have you seen Ephes?

• 1:08:50Andrew Santino?

  Huh?

• 1:08:50Speaker 05

  The movie Ephes?

• 1:08:51Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 1:08:51Speaker 05

  I recommend it.

• 1:08:52Andrew Santino?

  Ephes? E-F-U-S?

• 1:08:53Speaker 05

  It's like, E-E-F, yeah, E-E, no, E-E-P-H-U-S. Um, it's a baseball movie that I think just perfectly captures the spirit of baseball. It, the whole thing takes place in one day. It's a men's league team playing.

• 1:09:07Andrew Santino?

  Anybody I know that's in it? Is there anybody?

• 1:09:09Speaker 05

  There would be people, it's, it's, it's made, it was a big enough movie that probably you, yes.

• 1:09:15Andrew Santino?

  Mark it down?

• 1:09:15Speaker 07

  One of the gangster guys from Uncut Gems.

• 1:09:17Andrew Santino?

  Uncut Gems. We'll watch it.

• 1:09:20Speaker 05

  Bill Spaceman Lee has a cameo in it.

• 1:09:22Andrew Santino?

  Oh, really?

• 1:09:23Speaker 05

  Yeah, he's like an old man sitting on the bench watching the game.

• 1:09:25Andrew Santino?

  Do you know who that is? You don't know who that is, do you? Yeah, that's funny. Uh, recommend, this brings me to, this is a phenomenal question, because me and my cousin got in an argument, nah, discussion about it last night. Um, side note, watch Battered Bastards of Baseball. It's the best sports documentary I've ever seen in my life.

• 1:09:38Speaker 05

  Battered Bastards of Baseball?

• 1:09:38Andrew Santino?

  Battered Bastards of Baseball is by far the best sports doc.

• 1:09:40Speaker 05

  What's it about?

• 1:09:41Andrew Santino?

  Bing Russell, Kurt Russell's father owned a independent league baseball team. This is all a real story and you know Kurt Russell could have been a pro baseball player.

• 1:09:49Speaker 06

  I did not know that.

• 1:09:50Andrew Santino?

  Wait till you see this movie. His father owned a, his father was a famous actor on Bonanza. He died like 120 times on TV. He was a plumber actor as it were, where you just kind of work and work to work and never got rich, but never was poor. And ended up buying an independent league baseball team back when the major leagues were trying to kind of squash out independent leagues. It's maybe the most powerful thing I've ever seen.

• 1:10:10Speaker 06

  Really?

• 1:10:10Andrew Santino?

  It's fucking amazing. And the Way brothers did it. What's it called? Their band is called Chapman Way. The Way brothers now do like 30 for 30s and they do the Untold's and all that stuff. That's those guys.

• 1:10:20Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:10:20Andrew Santino?

  You'll notice it because the music is very similar in a lot of these. It's brilliantly composed. Anyway, battered bastards of baseball. My next point, because we got into the talk about this last night. Because you made me, my cousin goes, we had an argument back in Chicago, him and his buddies. Best sports movie of all time. And I go, sports across the board. And I said, this is hard because you're talking a movie that like centers around the game. You know what I mean?

• 1:10:43Speaker 06

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:10:43Andrew Santino?

  Like a Hoosiers, for example. Where they all have a message, but the game is a lot of it. Or something where the game is tertiary, but it's still a part of the film.

• 1:10:54Speaker 06

  So I actually, and I've probably said this to you before, I, for whatever reason, I love sports. I love movies. I don't like sports movies.

• 1:11:01Andrew Santino?

  Holy shit.

• 1:11:02Speaker 06

  Something about it's like, you two shouldn't mix. It's like, I want to watch sports.

• 1:11:06Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 1:11:06Speaker 06

  I want to watch a movie. I don't want to see you guys mix it.

• 1:11:10Andrew Santino?

  You hated The Blind Side.

• 1:11:11Speaker 06

  I kind of did like The Blind Side, actually.

• 1:11:14Andrew Santino?

  Alright.

• 1:11:14Speaker 06

  I liked The Blind Side. I liked Miracle.

• 1:11:16Andrew Santino?

  If you got an argument here. Remember The Titans?

• 1:11:19Speaker 06

  Haven't seen it.

• 1:11:20Andrew Santino?

  Haven't seen it?

• 1:11:21Speaker 06

  Like Coach Carter?

• 1:11:23Andrew Santino?

  Coach Carter? Rudy.

• 1:11:25Speaker 06

  Rudy, I hated as a kid.

• 1:11:27Andrew Santino?

  That's because you don't like Notre Dame.

• 1:11:28Speaker 06

  Yeah, I guess.

• 1:11:30Andrew Santino?

  That was, that was the problem growing up in Chicago. You either love Notre Dame or you hate Notre Dame. There is no in-between.

• 1:11:34Speaker 06

  Really?

• 1:11:35Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, 100%. Because Chicagoans are either bred to love Notre Dame because it's right there. Or you are just thoroughly against it because of all of the love that they get.

• 1:11:45Speaker 06

  All your dumb friends who like them for no reason.

• 1:11:46Andrew Santino?

  It's because everyone in, everyone in the Midwest. Has to have, we're, we all just wanna fight the thing. So we're like, if you like that, I fucking hate it.

• 1:11:56Speaker 06

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:11:56Andrew Santino?

  Why do you hate it? They're like, just because dude.

• 1:12:00Andrew Santino?

  So, many of my friends that don't like it, it's because they fucking hate Notre Dame.

• 1:12:03Speaker 06

  I mean, I watched it when I was like eight, and I think I was just bored by it.

• 1:12:06Andrew Santino?

  Gotta re-watch it.

• 1:12:07Speaker 06

  I don't know, maybe I'll re-watch. But now I don't really like Notre Dame.

• 1:12:10Andrew Santino?

  So no sports movies for you at all?

• 1:12:11Speaker 06

  Well, I said Like Mike is.

• 1:12:14Speaker 05

  First time I ever did Whippets, I was watching Like Mike.

• 1:12:16Andrew Santino?

  Really?

• 1:12:17Speaker 05

  Yeah, me and my friend, we were probably in like 5th grade.

• 1:12:19Andrew Santino?

  Whippets during Like Mike?

• 1:12:20Speaker 05

  Yeah, we were, we were doing a double header.

• 1:12:22Andrew Santino?

  Was it acid during Space Jam?

• 1:12:24Speaker 05

  We went back to back, we went Lizzie McGuire movie, then Like Mike. And in the middle, Like Mike, he was like, you wanna go upstairs and do some Whippets? And I had no idea what they were. And then we did some, I didn't care for them.

• 1:12:32Andrew Santino?

  I wanna be friends with you when you were a kid. That's a cool guy. Whippets and Lizzie McGuire.

• 1:12:39Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, back when you were normal. Drinking pop like a human. So what do you think, sports movie? What do you have?

• 1:12:45Speaker 05

  What's my favorite? I got, you're, I'm, I'm interested in that theory. I've never heard that before. I'd like you to.

• 1:12:50Andrew Santino?

  Like sports, like movie and.

• 1:12:52Speaker 06

  It's just, I don't know, to me, it's just like two different. Like, I think what I like about sports is sort of like we said, the unpredictability, like, who's gonna win?

• 1:12:58Andrew Santino?

  Sure, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:12:59Speaker 06

  Like, sports movies, pretty much know how it's, how it's gonna go, more or less.

• 1:13:03Andrew Santino?

  Sports docs, on the other hand.

• 1:13:05Speaker 06

  That, those I get into.

• 1:13:05Andrew Santino?

  See, that's, that's why you like Battered Bastards of Baseball, it's a doc. It's a, it's a true story doc, and there's no frill, it's just the, the story. That's why I love it.

• 1:13:13Speaker 06

  I think maybe it's like, you can't write a fake sports story that's as good as the real sports.

• 1:13:18Andrew Santino?

  Well, this is interesting, but what if the story is based on a real story?

• 1:13:20Speaker 06

  Like, I like Miracle.

• 1:13:21Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 1:13:21Speaker 06

  But like, that's just, you know.

• 1:13:23Speaker 05

  Miracle's.

• 1:13:23Andrew Santino?

  Remember the Titans?

• 1:13:24Speaker 05

  My number one with a bullet, for sure. I, I think a lot of sports movies do end up being pretty cheesy. So I think that's why I'm probably.

• 1:13:31Andrew Santino?

  You're saying Field of Dreams was cheesy? If you do build it, dude. They will fuckin'.

• 1:13:36Speaker 05

  Right, they're all, like, I, I was watching, you know what I was watching recently? Um, Hurricane, which I don't think I would really count as a sports movie, but has sports themes to it.

• 1:13:44Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, yeah. Civil rights film more than anything?

• 1:13:45Speaker 05

  Yeah, but I, I like, in that, I was like, yeah, this is kinda more. It was more cheesy than anything, it really was.

• 1:13:52Andrew Santino?

  These guys want equal rights? Fucking cheese ball.

• 1:13:56Speaker 05

  It might have been just cuz like, young Denzel was making me think of Remember the Titans, but like, there was part of it where I was like, yeah, this is a little kinda like Disney movie.

• 1:14:03Andrew Santino?

  It is.

• 1:14:03Speaker 05

  Rather than Hurricane.

• 1:14:06Andrew Santino?

  Well, I, I voiced my opinion as the greatest sports movie of all time, is He Got Game, is unequivocally the best.

• 1:14:11Speaker 05

  I haven't seen it.

• 1:14:12Speaker 06

  Me neither.

• 1:14:13Speaker 05

  I haven't seen it.

• 1:14:14Andrew Santino?

  I'm mad at both of you. Now I am mad at you.

• 1:14:18Speaker 05

  Fuck, I knew it was gonna happen.

• 1:14:19Andrew Santino?

  You're right. You were right.

• 1:14:21Speaker 05

  God, I made it to 324.

• 1:14:24Andrew Santino?

  Ray Allen, Denzel Washington.

• 1:14:26Speaker 05

  It's Spike Lee, right?

• 1:14:27Andrew Santino?

  Brother, how have you never seen He Got Game? Ray Allen, Jesus Shuttlesworth, that was his name in the movie.

• 1:14:33Speaker 05

  Like, you weren't really a Celtics.

• 1:14:35Andrew Santino?

  Well, Jesus Shuttlesworth was his name in the movie, but it's, it is probably one of the great, He Got Game is so fucking good. It is, it is about as close to a real story as it feels. Like, when I was a kid, the big movie was, um, uh, uh, uh, oh, man, I'm, oh, dude, I'm having a, a brain aneurysm. What's the, um, the basketball movie for the kids from Chicago?

• 1:14:58Speaker 05

  Hoop Dreams?

• 1:14:59Andrew Santino?

  Hoop Dreams. And, um, that felt like the most real version of Hoop Dreams in a, in a fictional tale. Because it does really embody this. This is what these kids go through when they go to get recruited and how they're kind of manipulated by people around them and it's so good.

• 1:15:15Speaker 05

  I, I, I also.

• 1:15:16Andrew Santino?

  Also, Blue, Blue Chip, Nick Nolte, Shaq? Not, you haven't seen this?

• 1:15:19Speaker 05

  No.

• 1:15:20Speaker 07

  What about Raging Bull?

• 1:15:21Andrew Santino?

  God, guys.

• 1:15:23Speaker 05

  Raging Bull? Nope.

• 1:15:24Andrew Santino?

  No!

• 1:15:25Speaker 05

  But listen, I was on the right.

• 1:15:26Andrew Santino?

  Get out of my fucking studio!

• 1:15:28Speaker 05

  I said it all like sports movies.

• 1:15:30Andrew Santino?

  We've skipped, we've skipped over Rocky and that's.

• 1:15:32Speaker 05

  I have seen Rocky.

• 1:15:33Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, I hope so. We've skipped over Rocky.

• 1:15:35Speaker 07

  The Color of Money.

• 1:15:35Andrew Santino?

  The Color of Money, yeah. Well, Money, Moneyball, Moneyball was another, my cousin said that was one of his top.

• 1:15:39Speaker 05

  Moneyball's for sure one of my top, but I have the issue with Moneyball that everyone has and it's very fair.

• 1:15:45Andrew Santino?

  Hold on.

• 1:15:46Speaker 05

  What?

• 1:15:47Andrew Santino?

  You hate Jonah Hill?

• 1:15:48Speaker 05

  No. No, the, the story of Moneyball doesn't make sense. Like.

• 1:15:54Andrew Santino?

  What do you mean?

• 1:15:54Speaker 05

  The movie doesn't bring up the fact that like they're, it doesn't, it didn't have anything to do with all that stuff. Like, yes, that all mattered. They had incredible starting rotation. It was Miguel Tejada, whose name isn't mentioned in the fucking movie.

• 1:16:06Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 1:16:07Speaker 05

  It's fucking Barry Zito, Tim Hudson, Mark Mulder. Like, their names aren't mentioned in that movie.

• 1:16:12Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it's interesting.

• 1:16:12Speaker 05

  They do make you, they talk about Scott Hattenberg the whole fucking movie.

• 1:16:15Andrew Santino?

  Well, they wanted to make the movie about, about Billy more than, it was about him.

• 1:16:18Speaker 05

  Right.

• 1:16:19Andrew Santino?

  It was more of like a, a piece on him than it was anything else.

• 1:16:21Speaker 05

  It, it, and I completely understand that and I get that Billy Bean did flip baseball and I, I think ruin American culture in the process.

• 1:16:28Andrew Santino?

  Cool. I like you again. I'm back.

• 1:16:32Speaker 05

  Dude, but the, uh, it just, I, I, I think you have to at least mention that those guys were on the team.

• 1:16:38Andrew Santino?

  Sure.

• 1:16:38Speaker 05

  You have to mention that a fucking MVP candidate was on the team. You have to mention that three Cy Young candidates were on the team.

• 1:16:43Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:16:43Speaker 05

  It's gotta come up at some point.

• 1:16:44Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you're leaving out a little bit. Well, what they're doing is creating more lore. I mean, lore is what sports are about.

• 1:16:49Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 1:16:49Andrew Santino?

  You wanna make the, even when those stories aren't true about some of these athletes, you do still wanna go along with it. I don't care sometimes if they're not true. But like you hear these kind of like tall tales of athletes before us, the stuff that they would do. I don't care that, you know, like Wilt slept with a hundred women or whatever, whatever, no.

• 1:17:07Speaker 05

  Yeah, thousand.

• 1:17:08Andrew Santino?

  Thousand women, I mean.

• 1:17:08Speaker 05

  Ten thousand.

• 1:17:09Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, ten thousand. Yeah. Right, and, and, and you're like, I don't care that that's, that's, sounds absurd. It's, it's a story of lore, right?

• 1:17:16Speaker 05

  Yeah, Babe Ruth, beer and hot dogs.

• 1:17:17Andrew Santino?

  Not, also, probably not true. Do you know what I mean? Like, all these things are probably not true. Like, I don't care. I still enjoy the fact that they're, and it builds the lore.

• 1:17:25Speaker 05

  I have an argument.

• 1:17:26Andrew Santino?

  The fish was this big, dude.

• 1:17:27Speaker 05

  Yeah, well, I have an argument that I've been working on that I think you're gonna like. It is that every sport should only have three stats.

• 1:17:35Andrew Santino?

  Every sport should have three stats.

• 1:17:36Speaker 05

  Cause, cause we have too many stats now and it, it's ruining the lore.

• 1:17:40Andrew Santino?

  Sure.

• 1:17:40Speaker 05

  Like, everything is, like, it used to be like, oh, he hit a ball 700 feet and all that stuff and, and now I think sports have gotten too much like video games or like just math in general, where there's so many fucking statistics for everything. I'm like, I just need his batting average, his homerun, and his RBIs. And I'll figure it out from there.

• 1:17:56Speaker 06

  Well, it is crazy when they do like awards voting based on like the saber metrics. Like, they'll be like, well, like, he actually should be the MVP or the Cy Young because like his metrics say he should have been this good. It's like, no, we have the stats to say how good they were. I get using that to build a team where it's like, I wanna go find value in a guy in a trade or free agency or something, but when you're like looking at it as like an evaluation, like, we've got those stats.

• 1:18:19Andrew Santino?

  Yeah. I, I, I get, I get this, but I also do think then you leave out things like Shohei's 50-50, like, you leave out things that you go, it's impressive because it's not, it's, I know what you mean.

• 1:18:30Speaker 05

  That, but I know what you mean.

• 1:18:31Andrew Santino?

  It layers, it layers onto something where you go, right, it, I do not like it when they throw in stuff that, quite frankly, I'm not interested in. I mean, I, but they do that. Because everyone wants, everyone wants recognition. Like, someone wants a number for everything. It's the only way that they'll feel seen.

• 1:18:48Speaker 05

  Right.

• 1:18:48Andrew Santino?

  Because a lot of these guys are like, "Well, I'm done in three years."

• 1:18:50Speaker 05

  Yeah, put my fucking war up there.

• 1:18:52Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:18:52Speaker 05

  See my line drive percentage?

• 1:18:56Andrew Santino?

  It is true. It is kinda like you do want that something to hold on to. Because athletes, when it's over, you do kinda see how they still really pine for the thing.

• 1:19:06Speaker 05

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:19:07Andrew Santino?

  And they're like, "You know, I used to be able to..." And you're like, "I know, but you're fat and you're 50 now."

• 1:19:10Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 1:19:11Andrew Santino?

  Like, it's fucking weird to watch guys that used to, like, admire you, like, "Oh, you're like a fat old guy now." And so if they don't have those numbers, it just feels like they weren't there.

• 1:19:20Speaker 05

  How does, how does that work with comedy? Like, the institutionalization of, like, sports? Like, when guys get out and they're like, "I don't even know what to do with my life." Do you see that with, like, comedy?

• 1:19:29Andrew Santino?

  Comedy, a lot of comics wanna be, like, comics, a lot of guys wanna be, like, cemented and remembered forever. Like, a lot of guys want, you know, their specials to be like their, you know, their, their, their catalog or whatever. I, I, I tend to be a little bit more self-hating in the idea that, like, I'm here for now. And if you like me, great. And I'm fun, and I just wanna have fun, be funny, make stuff, until you tell me to go away.

• 1:19:55Speaker 05

  And you don't care about your legacy?

• 1:19:56Speaker 06

  You wanna be forgotten.

• 1:19:57Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, yeah. Well, you will be. You're a, you're a grain of sand. You don't matter. Legacy, I think, is kinda bullshit.

• 1:20:03Speaker 05

  I completely agree.

• 1:20:03Andrew Santino?

  I just don't give a fuck about that.

• 1:20:05Speaker 05

  It lasts for a generation.

• 1:20:06Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, maybe.

• 1:20:07Speaker 05

  One generation, your legacy.

• 1:20:08Andrew Santino?

  And by the way, most people who are lega-, who do have a legacy, uh, it, that is grand, they usually, at some point, we're all, we turn out, you're like, "That guy kinda was a piece of shit."

• 1:20:19Speaker 05

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:20:20Andrew Santino?

  It kinda doesn't matter. I mean, I think legacy is a false, it's a false narrative, like, that someone is perfect or good, or, "We're all up and down flawed, so just enjoy the moment while they're here." And then, in fucking 100 years, this, all this, this, dude, this? You think this is fucking...

• 1:20:32Speaker 06

  No, they'll, they'll remember.

• 1:20:34Andrew Santino?

  They'll remember this.

• 1:20:36Speaker 05

  I think, I, I remember reading Conan, uh, I think he was on, whatever, he was on, like, the New York Times or something like that. He was talking about just how his career went.

• 1:20:44Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:20:44Speaker 05

  And he was talking about after the Leno stuff, where he just kinda had to have this moment of realization, where he's like, "Dude, you know what? All graves go unvisited."

• 1:20:52Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:20:52Speaker 05

  So just move on.

• 1:20:53Andrew Santino?

  And I'm getting cremated, so it's even more fucking, I'm like, disappear me into the sky. Who was that guy? Fine dude, who gives a fuck?

• 1:21:00Speaker 06

  I've always thought like, we gotta start like, emptying out some of these cemeteries, right?

• 1:21:05Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, we gotta dump them, yeah.

• 1:21:05Speaker 06

  Yeah.

• 1:21:06Andrew Santino?

  You're right.

• 1:21:06Speaker 05

  Yeah, I think.

• 1:21:07Speaker 06

  I mean, after a while, there's nobody left to visit you.

• 1:21:10Andrew Santino?

  Well, especially out by you guys too, the east coast is nothing but cemetery.

• 1:21:13Speaker 06

  Oh, we love our cemeteries.

• 1:21:14Andrew Santino?

  This is so gotta go, dude. Every time, every time you go from the airport to the city, you're like, Jesus Christ, it's all fucking cemetery, dude.

• 1:21:21Speaker 05

  The one on the way to LaGuardia is nuts.

• 1:21:24Andrew Santino?

  It's like six miles long, you're like, get rid of this, dude.

• 1:21:27Speaker 06

  It was like a pretty weekly activity. I thought that was like a normal thing. As a kid, like maybe once or twice a month, I'd go, you know, visit your grandpa in the cemetery. It's like, that, that was awful.

• 1:21:37Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, one of the worst things in the world. Cemeteries make no sense, get rid of them.

• 1:21:40Speaker 06

  You go put a rock on the stone so that they know you were there, yeah.

• 1:21:42Andrew Santino?

  I hate that.

• 1:21:43Speaker 05

  We had, my mom's weird, and we had a Christmas, not tradition, but one year she tried to start a new tradition where we went to the cemetery, and we were drinking at the time. Uh, and we, we just drank and sang Christmas carols to our deceased family member's graves. One of the most fun Christmases ever.

• 1:22:03Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:22:04Speaker 05

  It was fucking awesome, dude.

• 1:22:05Andrew Santino?

  Check this out, you could have just done that at the house. And just thought about them.

• 1:22:10Speaker 05

  No, we had to be, you gotta be in a field of dead people to really get the feeling of it.

• 1:22:16Andrew Santino?

  This is some old school, like, you gotta see that they're dead, know they're underneath you, and you blackout.

• 1:22:23Speaker 05

  Dude.

• 1:22:23Andrew Santino?

  You have to sing.

• 1:22:24Speaker 05

  We were just standing there, like twenty family members just passing around a bottle of whiskey, drinking champagne.

• 1:22:28Andrew Santino?

  Beautiful moment.

• 1:22:29Speaker 05

  Oh, it was unbelievable, truly, it was one of my favorite Christmas memories.

• 1:22:32Andrew Santino?

  Imagine if you're the family member that was annoyed, was like, guys, shut up, like, I'm here, I'm trying to rest. You guys pissed me off the whole time I was alive, you gotta do it again. I say, I say, uh, I say cremated, in the words of my grandfather, my hero who died, he goes, land is for the living.

• 1:22:48Speaker 05

  Ooh, I like that.

• 1:22:49Andrew Santino?

  You don't need, this is, this is not for you.

• 1:22:50Speaker 05

  I'm, I'm very much a cremate.

• 1:22:52Andrew Santino?

  Land is for the living, this is not for you, that's insane.

• 1:22:54Speaker 06

  I haven't thought about it yet, too afraid, too afraid to get there.

• 1:22:58Andrew Santino?

  Good luck on that flight home. By the way, boys, I want to say thank you. We flew by this, but it was very fucking fun. And I thank you guys for coming. Plug once again, just so people can watch. Les Mascots.

• 1:23:10Speaker 05

  Les Mascots.

• 1:23:11Andrew Santino?

  Les Mascots.

• 1:23:12Speaker 05

  On YouTube. Everything's out now.

• 1:23:13Speaker 06

  Out of order YouTube.

• 1:23:14Speaker 05

  Everything's out. Eight, seven episodes. They're all out if you're listening to this. It's gone. It was honestly, it was really fun to make. It was a really cool process for us. And it's gotten really good reviews. People really like it, so.

• 1:23:25Andrew Santino?

  You're gonna do it again and again and again.

• 1:23:26Speaker 05

  I hope so. I definitely hope to.

• 1:23:28Andrew Santino?

  We'll put the link in the description down below. Please watch it. I think as long as we keep making stuff like this for the fans, I hope that's how the cycle can continue because we're not looking to make $150 million budget. All right? This was a shoestring budget.

• 1:23:42Speaker 05

  This was a shoestring budget.

• 1:23:44Andrew Santino?

  They're just trying to make something for the peeps.

• 1:23:47Speaker 05

  I was talking to Pavs, the director of this, and he was saying that we maybe didn't market it correctly early. Where he was like, because it looks really great. He's incredibly talented, director and cinematographer and all that. And he was like, he's like, tell people that only four of us made this. Everyone's been like, oh, it looks beautiful. He's like, just tell, it's four guys, five guys running around New York who made this. And we had, honestly, God, I had the time of my life making it, so.

• 1:24:10Andrew Santino?

  Well, watch it.

• 1:24:11Speaker 05

  I hope you watch it. I hope you like it.

• 1:24:12Andrew Santino?

  Four adult men made it. Four adults. Four guys. Four guys. Watch it.

• 1:24:17Speaker 05

  With a lot of help from other people, but mostly.

• 1:24:20Andrew Santino?

  Well, watch it. Link in the description below. We end the show the same way. You look into that camera. And you can do it at the same time or separately. You can do one word or one phrase to end the episode. One word or a phrase to end the episode. It's gonna be cemented in history forever. This will go into Smithsonian at some point. I've said that. And it will.

• 1:24:36Speaker 05

  I have, I can't think of anything else, so I'm just gonna say it.

• 1:24:38Andrew Santino?

  What?

• 1:24:38Speaker 05

  Anal.

• 1:24:40Speaker 06

  I was gonna say, um, to the people in 3120 who are watching this, it's the only thing that's made it. This isn't even a phrase, but it's the only thing that's made it is this podcast from 2025, so I'm glad you're watching a thousand years from. I guess, yeah.

• 1:24:53Andrew Santino?

  That's good.

• 1:24:53Speaker 05

  I don't know why anal came in my head. I think it's your fault, to be honest.

• 1:24:56Andrew Santino?

  And I gotta be honest with you, that's gonna come back to bite you.

• 1:24:59Speaker 05

  Why?

• 1:25:00Andrew Santino?

  You'll see.

• 1:25:01Speaker 05

  Oh, no.

• 1:25:04Speaker 03

  And here, we pour whiskey, whiskey, whiskey, whiskey, whiskey.

• 1:25:14Speaker 03

  Ginger gene is a curse. Gingers are beautiful. You owe me five dollars for the whiskey. And seventy-five dollars for the horse. Gingers? Oh, hell no.

• 1:25:22Speaker 04

  This whiskey is excellent. Ginger. I like gingers.