MFM Minisode 478

This week’s hometowns include a mafia grandma and generational trash parenting. For our sources, please visit https://www.myfavoritemurder.com/episodes. Support this podcast by shopping our latest sponsor deals and promotions at this link: https://bit.ly/3UFCn1g. Head to social media to share your favorite moments from this episode. Instagram: instagram.com/myfavoritemurder http://instagram.com/myfavoritemurder Facebook: facebook.com/myfavoritemurder http://facebook.com/myfavoritemurder TikTok: tiktok.com/@my_favorite_murder http://tiktok.com/@my_favorite_murder Send your hometown stories to [email protected] mailto:[email protected]. Join the Fan Cult to access ad-free episodes of My Favorite Murder. Members also receive merch store discounts, exclusive audio and video content and more! Visit www.fancult.supercast.com http://www.fancult.supercast.com/ to join. Shop for My Favorite Murder and other Exactly Right merchandise here: www.exactlyrightstore.com https://www.exactlyrightstore.com. Rate, review and follow My Favorite Murder on the iHeartRadio, Apple Podcasts, Spotify or wherever you like to listen. See omnystudio.com/listener https://omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:01Karen Kilgariff?

  This is exactly right.

• 0:06Speaker 01

  Cash Flow Crunch. OnDeck's small business line of credit gives your business immediate access to funds, up to $200,000, right when you need it. Cover seasonal dips, manage payroll, restock inventory, or tackle unexpected expenses without missing a beat. With flexible draws, transparent pricing, and control over repayment, get funded quickly and confidently. Apply today at ondeck.com. Funds could be available as soon as tomorrow. Depending on certain loan attributes, your business loan may be issued by OnDeck or Celtic Bank. OnDeck does not lend in North Dakota. All loans and amounts subject to lender approval.

• 0:36Speaker 02

  In New Orleans, truckers kept getting sideswiped the exact same way. When a man is found murdered under questionable circumstances related to these accidents, the rubber hits the road. And what the feds uncover is a complex scheme of staged wrecks, financial fraud, and a pair of conspiring lovers behind it. This is a story about fake accidents that led to real consequences. Listen to Over My Dead Body: Operation Sideswipe wherever you get your podcasts. Audible subscribers can binge all episodes early and ad-free right now. Join Audible in the Audible app or by subscribing on Apple Podcasts or Spotify.

• 1:29Karen Kilgariff?

  Hello and welcome

• 1:31Georgia Hardstark?

  to my favorite murder.

• 1:32Karen Kilgariff?

  The minisode.

• 1:33Georgia Hardstark?

  We read you, the stories that you send us.

• 1:36Karen Kilgariff?

  And I keep air drying my hair. So what you're hearing now, it sounds so smooth and silky, but what you're seeing

• 1:45Georgia Hardstark?

  were a mess. But this is the chill episode. I feel like this is the easy, like, light lift episode.

• 1:51Karen Kilgariff?

  Is this the clean girl makeup episode?

• 1:52Georgia Hardstark?

  No, I mean, like hometowns. Just feel like

• 1:55Karen Kilgariff?

  do we have to be so perfect all the time?

• 1:58Georgia Hardstark?

  Not like in the regular episodes where we're fucking

• 2:00Karen Kilgariff?

  where it's

• 2:01Georgia Hardstark?

  on it.

• 2:02Karen Kilgariff?

  Snatched.

• 2:02Georgia Hardstark?

  Killing it.

• 2:03Karen Kilgariff?

  This is a nice concise one to kick it off. The subject line is "Classic Hometown and Badass Grandpa." And it says, it just goes right into it. "My grandpa Ray was and always will be a total badass and my hero."

• 2:15Georgia Hardstark?

  Ray.

• 2:17Karen Kilgariff?

  I could write stories for days, but my favorite was the time that he casually told me he spent part of his childhood alongside an infamous killer. Grandpa grew up in the hauler of Brush Mountain in Blacksburg, Virginia, where I was born and raised. He once told me about a boy who lived up the same road, in quotes, "A different fella," he said, "who had a glass eye." The boy's mama was a sex worker and his daddy... I bet that's not how his...

• 2:41Georgia Hardstark?

  Right. He did not use those words.

• 2:44Karen Kilgariff?

  "The boy's mama was a sex worker and his daddy didn't have any legs." Grandpa added, almost as an afterthought, "That the fellow went on to kill women out west and confessed to many other murders." I immediately called bullshit on grandpa. That's when my mom chimed in, "No, it's true. That's right. Grandpa grew up alongside Henry Lee Lucas, the confession killer."

• 3:05Georgia Hardstark?

  Holy shit.

• 3:07Karen Kilgariff?

  Henry Lee Lucas was his neighborhood kid.

• 3:09Georgia Hardstark?

  No.

• 3:10Karen Kilgariff?

  Grandpa Ray passed away 10 years ago, but I treasure the 26 years I got to spend with him and the many stories he shared. I would love to hear Grandpa Ray hauler stories.

• 3:21Georgia Hardstark?

  Absolutely.

• 3:22Karen Kilgariff?

  Especially that one in particular.

• 3:23Georgia Hardstark?

  Sure.

• 3:24Karen Kilgariff?

  Stay sexy and don't be too quick to call bullshit on grandpa, Amy.

• 3:29Georgia Hardstark?

  I love immediate bullshit on grandpa. Like, I would never have the gall to call bullshit on a grandpa.

• 3:36Karen Kilgariff?

  That's how these kids are these days.

• 3:38Georgia Hardstark?

  It's true.

• 3:39Karen Kilgariff?

  These Gen Z'ers.

• 3:40Georgia Hardstark?

  That's right.

• 3:41Karen Kilgariff?

  They yearn for justice.

• 3:42Georgia Hardstark?

  Okay. This is called "One Hour Photo for Good." If you're actually reading this, I am so grateful to this podcast and everyone who makes it happen. I have been a listener since 2016.

• 3:52Karen Kilgariff?

  Hey.

• 3:53Georgia Hardstark?

  Your podcast talked me off the ledge the morning after the election that year. Can you believe we thought that was the worst that could happen?

• 4:00Karen Kilgariff?

  Damn.

• 4:01Georgia Hardstark?

  You've been my friends and traveling companions through so much, giving me laughter through breast cancer, divorce, pet loss, an empty nest, and so much more. I appreciate you ladies and count you as sisters.

• 4:12Karen Kilgariff?

  Oh, my God.

• 4:13Georgia Hardstark?

  I know. But I want to tell you about something that happened when I was 19. It was 1989, and I had dropped out of college. Concerned about my well-being, my older brother invited me to move from my home state of Kentucky down to League City, Texas.

• 4:28Karen Kilgariff?

  Hmm.

• 4:29Georgia Hardstark?

  Big baseball town.

• 4:30Karen Kilgariff?

  Mm-hmm.

• 4:31Georgia Hardstark?

  Lot of leagues, lot of baseball leagues?

• 4:32Karen Kilgariff?

  Lot of leagues. Measurements under the sea?

• 4:34Georgia Hardstark?

  I don't know. That is a whole nother story. I quickly got a job at a one-hour photo lab in Friendswood, Texas, just up the interstate, one exit. My sister worked at a one-hour photo place when she was in high school and it was-

• 4:46Karen Kilgariff?

  She saw some shit.

• 4:47Georgia Hardstark?

  Awesome, yeah. We all saw, we all got to see some shit.

• 4:50Karen Kilgariff?

  I bet.

• 4:52Georgia Hardstark?

  It was a busy one-hour lab in a big mall. There were regulars with rolls of film chronicling their lives. Do you remember disc cameras in stamatics? These took terrible pictures.

• 5:02Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah, they did.

• 5:03Georgia Hardstark?

  Did they?

• 5:04Karen Kilgariff?

  Me and my sister got them for Christmas one year from Aunt Manann. And they came in this big, it was almost like an unboxing box. It came in this big box. It was such a big deal.

• 5:13Georgia Hardstark?

  Presentation.

• 5:14Karen Kilgariff?

  But it felt like they were cameras made for, to give kids a camera and be like, here, go take some pictures. And that's what all, everything was like from a down here perspective, like downward, going up.

• 5:25Georgia Hardstark?

  Right. I remember this, okay. These took terrible pictures, but then there was the 35-millimeter film in 12, 24, or 36-frame rolls. I should know that. My sister is now a photographer.

• 5:35Karen Kilgariff?

  I was gonna say, did Lee learn it at the photo development lab?

• 5:38Georgia Hardstark?

  No, she, since high school, she's been doing it.

• 5:40Karen Kilgariff?

  Oh, yeah.

• 5:41Georgia Hardstark?

  She's dedicated. Okay. Most people got single or double prints, except for a regular customer who came in about once a week, dropped off a roll for film processing only. He would be back on the hour to pick up the film. He asked us to keep the whole roll intact, place in a special clear plastic sleeve, then rolled, and then put back into the paper bag. So I feel like we need to explain to some children that are listening-

• 6:04Karen Kilgariff?

  Oh, yeah.

• 6:05Georgia Hardstark?

  -that instead of getting the film developed into actual photos, you would just get them turned into film so you could go home in your own darkroom and develop them yourself.

• 6:15Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah.

• 6:16Georgia Hardstark?

  Meaning, no one would see the film at the one-hour photo store.

• 6:19Karen Kilgariff?

  See, I didn't know that. I'm learning with the children. I didn't realize that was an option.

• 6:23Georgia Hardstark?

  He's basically getting a thing to then go home and do it himself, instead of-

• 6:26Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah. He's like, you have to take the first two steps for me, because I don't have like the chemicals or something.

• 6:31Georgia Hardstark?

  Sure, I don't know. That's all I know.

• 6:33Karen Kilgariff?

  All he's saying is, what's happening on this film is illegal.

• 6:35Georgia Hardstark?

  Totally. And I don't want you to see it.

• 6:37Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah, totally.

• 6:38Georgia Hardstark?

  My boss, a no-nonsense, native Texan- A year older than me named Lisa stopped me the first time I processed a roll of his film. She took the roll, looked at it on the light table, quickly printed a few frames. The date was automatically printed on the back of each print. The pictures would go through the machine in a long strip coming down a conveyor belt to be packaged. The people in the mall could watch the stream of images. She covered the conveyor when his went through.

• 7:04Karen Kilgariff?

  Oh.

• 7:05Georgia Hardstark?

  So she's going clandestine.

• 7:06Karen Kilgariff?

  Lisa knows exactly what's happening here.

• 7:08Georgia Hardstark?

  Right.

• 7:08Karen Kilgariff?

  And she's going to do something about it.

• 7:10Georgia Hardstark?

  I love this one because I remember every single older like boss or coworker I had from when I was stupid at 19.

• 7:18Karen Kilgariff?

  Sure.

• 7:18Georgia Hardstark?

  Instead of stupid in 45, that like taught me so much about life. They were like so no nonsense.

• 7:23Karen Kilgariff?

  Yes. Well, also because they were the holders and like they were the rule followers as the example.

• 7:29Georgia Hardstark?

  Right.

• 7:29Karen Kilgariff?

  So when they were breaking rules, you were like, wait, what's happening now? Like the waitress that passed my mom the aspirin where it's like, we don't know why this is the rule. Your child has a headache. I'm going to give you some.

• 7:37Georgia Hardstark?

  Totally. And I trust you to make that decision on your own.

• 7:40Karen Kilgariff?

  Yes.

• 7:40Georgia Hardstark?

  Okay. When she handed me the printed pictures, I saw images of him, a dumpy, middle aged man in states of getting nude in an empty classroom. The pictures went into a package she kept in her desk. Okay, weird. She instructed me to print samples from his film whenever he came in. Sometimes his wife would drop off the film. Then one fateful day, he brought in a roll that included a girl, elementary age, sitting at a school desk, looking down, writing, seemingly, and I hope honestly unaware that he was several rows back behind her with his pants around his ankles.

• 8:16Karen Kilgariff?

  Jesus Christ.

• 8:17Georgia Hardstark?

  My badass 20 year old boss printed every frame on that roll. Then she called the FBI. And after that, our district manager.

• 8:26Karen Kilgariff?

  Yes.

• 8:26Georgia Hardstark?

  Lisa.

• 8:27Karen Kilgariff?

  Lisa was like, I'm not messing with the local cops.

• 8:30Georgia Hardstark?

  No.

• 8:30Karen Kilgariff?

  This is a federal case.

• 8:31Georgia Hardstark?

  I have them on speed dial.

• 8:33Karen Kilgariff?

  Fuck.

• 8:35Georgia Hardstark?

  I've never seen that kind of calm, sure, get this shit dealt with self-confidence before. He and his wife, who held the camera, who held the camera. So they were doing it together. I didn't even see that.

• 8:47Karen Kilgariff?

  Oh.

• 8:48Georgia Hardstark?

  Were arrested and went to jail. He lost his teaching license. I don't know where Lisa is now, but I'm sure she's doing good.

• 8:55Karen Kilgariff?

  Bet she is.

• 8:56Georgia Hardstark?

  Thank you for reading, Heather.

• 8:57Karen Kilgariff?

  Especially in a time like this. We are now just up to our eyeballs in this nightmare Epstein file bullshit, which is like, just this kind of stuff that's been like brushed under the carpet and hidden away for years.

• 9:11Georgia Hardstark?

  Excused.

• 9:12Karen Kilgariff?

  Yep. And made smaller, whatever. It's just like Lisa's been fighting the good fight.

• 9:17Georgia Hardstark?

  Totally.

• 9:18Karen Kilgariff?

  Since.

• 9:19Georgia Hardstark?

  Eighty-nine?

• 9:20Karen Kilgariff?

  I mean.

• 9:21Georgia Hardstark?

  That's, yeah.

• 9:22Karen Kilgariff?

  Come on.

• 9:23Georgia Hardstark?

  Tell us your stories about the older kid that you knew that was a fucking badass that gave you the courage to also be a badass.

• 9:29Karen Kilgariff?

  Yes.

• 9:30Georgia Hardstark?

  Right?

• 9:31Karen Kilgariff?

  Your example.

• 9:32Georgia Hardstark?

  Yes.

• 9:33Karen Kilgariff?

  Your example, like, late teen.

• 9:34Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah. My favorite murder at Gmail.

• 9:36Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah.

• 9:37Georgia Hardstark?

  Please send them in.

• 9:38Karen Kilgariff?

  Literally, I thought you were like, do you have Epstein stories?

• 9:41Georgia Hardstark?

  Send us your... I'm not... That's not funny.

• 9:45Karen Kilgariff?

  That's not funny at all. And that's how we do things over here.

• 9:48Georgia Hardstark?

  Send those to the FBI.

• 9:50Karen Kilgariff?

  Send... Call in.

• 9:52Speaker 01

  Cash Flow Crunch? OnDeck's small business line of credit gives your business immediate access to funds, up to $200,000, right when you need it. Cover seasonal dips, manage payroll, restock inventory, or tackle unexpected expenses without missing a beat. With flexible draws, transparent pricing, and control over repayment, get funded quickly and confidently. Apply today at ondeck.com. Funds could be available as soon as tomorrow. Depending on certain loan attributes, your business loan may be issued by OnDeck or Celtic Bank. OnDeck does not lend in North Dakota. All loans and amounts subject to lender approval.

• 10:23Georgia Hardstark?

  There are plenty of things that keep you up at night. Your sleep tracker shouldn't be one of them.

• 10:28Karen Kilgariff?

  You know that feeling, laying in bed, staring at the ceiling, counting all the times you said something weird.

• 10:32Georgia Hardstark?

  And then you wake up and check your sleep score. Now you have to start your day knowing that you failed at sleeping.

• 10:38Karen Kilgariff?

  Hatch Sleep Clock does it differently.

• 10:40Georgia Hardstark?

  It tracks your sleep from your nightstand. No ring, wristband, or judgmental score. Score waiting for you in the morning.

• 10:45Karen Kilgariff?

  Instead, you'll get personalized insights to understand your sleep and recommendations to build a routine you'll love night after night.

• 10:52Georgia Hardstark?

  Fall asleep to the next chapter of an audiobook like The Odyssey, a nervous system reset meditation, or a calming sound bath.

• 10:58Karen Kilgariff?

  Then you can find out which gives you 20 more minutes of deep sleep each night.

• 11:03Georgia Hardstark?

  Hatch Sleep Clock.

• 11:04Karen Kilgariff?

  The sleep tracker designed to get you to sleep. Available now on hatch.co.

• 11:08Georgia Hardstark?

  Goodbye.

• 11:10Karen Kilgariff?

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• 11:55Karen Kilgariff?

  of a website or domain. Goodbye. Okay, I'm not going to read you the subject line. It says, "Hello, badass MFM podcast family. I grew up in the same house that my mother was raised in, which was built by my great-grandfather after they emigrated from Italy in the 1940s." Come on, abundanza. Sorry, Leona.

• 12:14Georgia Hardstark?

  Every time you say Italy, you have to touch the Italy thing. Do it.

• 12:19Karen Kilgariff?

  Italy!

• 12:20Georgia Hardstark?

  Italy!

• 12:23Karen Kilgariff?

  Okay. "My grandmother purchased it from her parents and eventually sold it to my mother when I was maybe 12. At that point, my grandmother moved upstairs and my parents commissioned Hella Construction to make sure..." Did I miss that the first time? "...Hella Construction to make sure that she was comfortable in what would become a finished mother-daughter apartment. Because I was 12 and my parents wanted to make me feel better about the whole move, they promised to renovate one of the bedrooms for me, too, which involved knocking out a wall and building out the foundation of the house. The whole bedroom ended up being larger than my first studio apartment."

• 12:56Georgia Hardstark?

  Jesus.

• 12:57Karen Kilgariff?

  Nice. Here's the thing. My great-grandfather was in cement. His son, my great-uncle, followed suit, more or less, in the cement business.

• 13:07Georgia Hardstark?

  Jesus Christ.

• 13:07Karen Kilgariff?

  I know, sorry.

• 13:08Georgia Hardstark?

  It was like buried under the house in cement?

• 13:10Karen Kilgariff?

  I actually wasn't sure. I had to.

• 13:12Georgia Hardstark?

  In cement, I get it.

• 13:14Karen Kilgariff?

  Search for those context clues, okay.

• 13:15Georgia Hardstark?

  Okay.

• 13:16Karen Kilgariff?

  My mother said, with quotes around it, so.

• 13:18Georgia Hardstark?

  Okay, so here we go.

• 13:19Karen Kilgariff?

  My mother said that when she was a kid, Uncle Charlie would come to the house at all sorts of weird hours with weird people and weird things. One of her more memorable stories involved him showing up just before their bedtime with a life-size statue of Saint Jude, which he took from a church that was being renovated because they were throwing it out. Saint Jude still lives in my parents' basement because everyone's afraid it's the only thing bringing good juju into the house at this point. A full-size statue.

• 13:45Georgia Hardstark?

  I don't think you can throw away, like, think your roots from.

• 13:48Karen Kilgariff?

  Reliquary, unless it.

• 13:49Georgia Hardstark?

  Thank you.

• 13:50Karen Kilgariff?

  Right? Sorry, I really had to bust that one out.

• 13:52Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah, it was good.

• 13:53Karen Kilgariff?

  God, it's so rare that a word comes into my head anymore. That one really was waiting.

• 13:57Georgia Hardstark?

  You've been holding on to that. I've never even heard that word. That's how good it was.

• 14:02Karen Kilgariff?

  Oh, I'm so proud of my fucked-up brain. Okay, yeah, I don't think they just throw out statues because they're redoing the place.

• 14:10Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 14:11Karen Kilgariff?

  The style's been pretty similar since about 1590, I would guess. Okay, my parents' basement is still a treasure trove of what the fuck because my grandmother was a hoarder and it's taken more than five years to clear out all her stuff. My grandmother's second husband collected guns and they knew my grandmother had held on to an antique pearl-handled pistol, but these weren't pretty collectibles. That particular closet backs up to the attic, which is accessible through a creepy little door in the back wall. And something told my parents to investigate further. Well, after a weekend of deep diving through support beams and insulation, they found upwards of a dozen firearms hidden in the attic, including models that are very illegal to own.

• 14:53Karen Kilgariff?

  They have no idea how long they'd been there, who originally owned them, or why my grandmother was hiding them, but that's not the story I'm really emailing about.

• 15:01Georgia Hardstark?

  What?

• 15:03Karen Kilgariff?

  Yep, sorry, not talking about that.

• 15:05Georgia Hardstark?

  Okay.

• 15:06Karen Kilgariff?

  It says, "Several years later, I was visiting my parents for a weekend and we were sitting around the table after lunch, talking about some weird dreams we'd had. My mother made a reference to the hidden attic guns, saying she felt like there was another gun hidden somewhere and dreamed about it often. In her dreams, it was buried in the backyard or sometimes the side garden. She said something about the cement used to pour the walkway, and my dad's face went totally white. He was noticeably uncomfortable and when we asked what was wrong, he just asked, 'If I break a promise to someone who's dead, will they come back and haunt you?'" My dad has always been a pretty straightforward guy. My mother's family is old-school Italian superstitious, but my dad, not so much. So, old-school Italian su- ding.

• 15:51Karen Kilgariff?

  "So this was kind of a weird question to ask at the lunch table. At this point, all the alarm bells in my mother's head are going off, and she demands to know what he's talking about. After a few minutes of sweating and dodging questions, he tells us this story. When my parents were building the addition to the house, they hired a friend of my great uncle's to do the construction. The plan was to build a new living room where the concrete porch used to be, but when they went to dig it up, they found it went down way further than was structurally necessary and decided the best idea was just to use that as the foundation. That meant matching the depth when they poured the foundation for my new bedroom. The morning they scheduled the concrete pour, my grandmother called my dad upstairs and handled him a bundle of sheets. 'Give this to the guys,' she told him.

• 16:36Karen Kilgariff?

  'They'll know what to do with it, and whatever you do, don't tell your wife.'" My dad did as he was told and handed the bundle to my great uncle's friend, who unwrapped it just enough to see the handgun inside and just gave it a nod before setting it into the cement.

• 16:50Georgia Hardstark?

  Oh, my god.

• 16:51Karen Kilgariff?

  So aside from finding out that my childhood bedroom was built over a hidden handgun, we also realized that if my grandmother had been cool with hiding some dozen guns in the attic, this particular gun must have been responsible for some atrocious shit

• 17:04Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 17:05Karen Kilgariff?

  if it needed to be hidden forever in a foundation.

• 17:08Georgia Hardstark?

  It was hot.

• 17:09Karen Kilgariff?

  It was hot and potentially connected to a international murder.

• 17:13Georgia Hardstark?

  Mafia.

• 17:14Karen Kilgariff?

  Murder. Got to say, if I'm ever in trouble, I'm going to my dad for help because he immediately forgot all about the incident and was never even tempted to tell my mother until that exact day when she had had the dream that there was a gun somewhere on the property. If this ends up getting read on a mini-soat, thanks for sharing in my ruined childhood. Stay sexy and don't get murdered. Faith.

• 17:35Georgia Hardstark?

  Wow, Faith.

• 17:36Karen Kilgariff?

  That's a very Sopranos email.

• 17:38Georgia Hardstark?

  It's Meadow. It could be signed Meadow.

• 17:41Karen Kilgariff?

  Your friend Meadow.

• 17:43Georgia Hardstark?

  Okay. My mom fucked politeness at the laundromat. Hey, y'all. That's all I have in me. So, that's all I have in me for an intro, so let's jump in.

• 17:53Karen Kilgariff?

  Sounds good.

• 17:53Georgia Hardstark?

  There. When I was in middle school, my parents were remodeling our house and we didn't have a laundry room for over a year and had to do all of our laundry at the local laundromats. I always went with my mom to hang out for a few hours while the clothes washed and dried. All the other customers were always kind, usually women and kids hanging out. One day, while we were loading up the laundry and supplies into the back of the vehicle, a man stopped my mom. He had been sitting outside in the Alabama heat the whole time we were there. I didn't stop and went to sit in the car, but I heard him ask her for a ride to a local motel. I heard my mom say, "Sir, you know I can't do that", and shot her eyes over to me. Next I knew my mom was at my door telling me to shut

• 18:34Georgia Hardstark?

  it and lock it. I was being a bratty teen and said no because it was hot and she hadn't started the car yet, just like leaning with the door open. She said through gritted teeth, "Shut the door now." I probably rolled my eyes and crossed my arms after shutting the door because I was, and then, dramatic. She was a little upset with me when she got in, but then we drove home like normal. When we got home, my mom told my dad about the conversation with the man, including the parts I didn't see. The man had lifted his shirt to show a gun in his waistband and told her that he would keep us safe. So I can't drive you. I'm scared. I'll keep you safe.

• 19:14Karen Kilgariff?

  I'll keep you safe.

• 19:15Georgia Hardstark?

  Don't worry, I have a gun. I'll keep you safe.

• 19:16Karen Kilgariff?

  It's me, the strange man with the gun. I'll keep you safe.

• 19:18Georgia Hardstark?

  And my waistband.

• 19:20Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah.

• 19:20Georgia Hardstark?

  After she told the man no, again, he threw his flip phone at the brick wall of the laundromat in anger. She also told my dad about how I wouldn't shut the door and he got upset with me too. But as a parent myself, now I understand their reactions were out of fear. Safe to say, our washer dryer were installed that week and we never went back to the laundromat again. I'll never know what intentions that man had, but I'm glad my mom fucked politeness and kept us safe. She is such a strong woman and I hope I am showing my kids a fraction of the strength and determination she has. Her name is Tara, pronounced Tara. Stay sexy and shut the car door when your mom asks. Ambria, pronounced Ambria.

• 20:02Karen Kilgariff?

  Oh, nice.

• 20:02Georgia Hardstark?

  I've heard that name before. It's pretty... Feel free to use my name. Love you guys and all that you do.

• 20:07Karen Kilgariff?

  Ambria, here's what I love, that you're like, I understand that she was saying that to me out of fear. It's like, do you understand that you need to be a team player? And if the person that knows more than you and is smarter than you and has been around so much longer than you comes up and tells you to do a thing.

• 20:20Georgia Hardstark?

  Shut the fucking door.

• 20:21Karen Kilgariff?

  With a certain kind of energy, maybe focus on that.

• 20:25Georgia Hardstark?

  Teens have no clue. They're like equally the best people in the world and the worst people in the world at the same time.

• 20:30Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah, I mean, it's not fair in a lot of ways because you're the youngest old person. So you're the dumbest old person.

• 20:36Georgia Hardstark?

  Right.

• 20:37Karen Kilgariff?

  Usually.

• 20:37Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 20:38Karen Kilgariff?

  But in those situations where it's just like,

• 20:42Karen Kilgariff?

  I just wish she had done a full like, I should have listened to my mom the first time and had some spatial awareness. Instead, it's like, I understand she was working out of fear. Like, there was a gun.

• 20:52Georgia Hardstark?

  A guy with a gun.

• 20:54Karen Kilgariff?

  Okay. I love yelling.

• 20:58Speaker 04

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• 21:29Georgia Hardstark?

  There are plenty of things that keep you up at night. Your sleep tracker shouldn't be one of them.

• 21:33Karen Kilgariff?

  You know that feeling, laying in bed, staring at the ceiling, counting all the times you said something weird.

• 21:38Georgia Hardstark?

  And then you wake up and check your sleep score. Now you have to start your day knowing that you failed at sleeping.

• 21:43Karen Kilgariff?

  Hatch Sleep Clock does it differently.

• 21:45Georgia Hardstark?

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• 21:51Karen Kilgariff?

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• 21:57Georgia Hardstark?

  Fall asleep to the next chapter of an audiobook, like The Odyssey, a nervous system reset meditation, or a calming sound bath.

• 22:04Karen Kilgariff?

  Then you can find out which gives you 20 more minutes of deep sleep each night.

• 22:08Georgia Hardstark?

  Hatch Sleep Clock.

• 22:09Karen Kilgariff?

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• 22:14Georgia Hardstark?

  Goodbye.

• 22:15Speaker 05

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• 22:47Karen Kilgariff?

  So, you know, we're talking about, hey, sometimes it's the kids' fault. Hey, sometimes it's the parents' fault.

• 22:51Georgia Hardstark?

  Okay.

• 22:52Karen Kilgariff?

  As we well know. I'm not going to read you the subject line. It just says, "Hi, fellow murder-loving people." Again, we don't love murder.

• 22:59Georgia Hardstark?

  No.

• 23:00Karen Kilgariff?

  "It was summer of 2005, and I was eight years old when we took a family vacation to Yosemite and San Francisco. While in San Fran, we got a boat tour that took us past Alcatraz and to some other island close by."

• 23:13Georgia Hardstark?

  What is that, Marin?

• 23:15Karen Kilgariff?

  Treasure Island, yeah. Well, it depends on where they were going. I don't remember there being a two-island stop for the Alcatraz tour, but I haven't been there since.

• 23:23Georgia Hardstark?

  Alcatraz, too.

• 23:25Karen Kilgariff?

  It's smaller and hipper and there's a disco.

• 23:30Karen Kilgariff?

  There's an amazing nightlife on Alcatraz, too. Okay, my dad was really nervous that I was gonna get seasick, so he gave me three Dramamine and we boarded the boat. Turns out that the serving size of Dramamine for an eight-year-old is half a pill, so I was knocked the fuck out.

• 23:46Georgia Hardstark?

  Hell, yeah.

• 23:47Karen Kilgariff?

  My dad happens to be a fireman.

• 23:49Georgia Hardstark?

  Oh, my god.

• 23:50Karen Kilgariff?

  And it says he's retired now. This is so classic. So he walked around the island, Alcatraz, with my sleeping eight-year-old body thrown over his shoulder in a fireman's carry. So can I just stop here to tell you this? And this is the most privileged dad life thing I will ever tell you.

• 24:08Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 24:09Karen Kilgariff?

  Which is that at night, when we were little, my dad, you could do the fireman's carry, you could do sack of potatoes, or you could ride a horse to bed. Those are the three ways we got carried to bed.

• 24:19Georgia Hardstark?

  And you gotta pick which one?

• 24:21Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah.

• 24:22Georgia Hardstark?

  That's so cute.

• 24:23Karen Kilgariff?

  So fireman's, you're just bent over his shoulder.

• 24:25Georgia Hardstark?

  That kinda hurts your stomach a little bit.

• 24:27Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah, it's not that fun. Sack of potatoes, he's holding you by your ankles.

• 24:30Georgia Hardstark?

  And you're behind? Oh, my god.

• 24:32Karen Kilgariff?

  But then the horse, you got on back and you put your hand over his mouth to feed the horse, and he ran down the hallway and threw you on the bed.

• 24:40Georgia Hardstark?

  Can he do it now? Can I have that?

• 24:42Karen Kilgariff?

  I mean, no, he can only do it verbally.

• 24:45Georgia Hardstark?

  Right.

• 24:45Karen Kilgariff?

  Fun times.

• 24:46Georgia Hardstark?

  That's hilarious.

• 24:47Karen Kilgariff?

  The physical isn't there with him anymore. But it was, Laura and I talk about it sometimes, we're like, that might be the greatest

• 24:53Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 24:53Karen Kilgariff?

  privilege.

• 24:54Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah, having a firefighter dad. Oh, my god.

• 24:56Karen Kilgariff?

  So that's, I think this one gets me, especially because he just basically, like every fireman's like, we're just gonna solve this problem.

• 25:02Georgia Hardstark?

  Just fucking.

• 25:03Karen Kilgariff?

  Here.

• 25:04Georgia Hardstark?

  I'm gonna ask, next time Vince's brother is in town, I'm gonna ask him to carry me like a sack of potatoes.

• 25:09Karen Kilgariff?

  He could do, I'll take sack of potatoes or a horse.

• 25:11Georgia Hardstark?

  Right.

• 25:12Karen Kilgariff?

  Okay, so he would occasionally stop and wake me up to eat ice cream and drink water with my eyes closed.

• 25:18Georgia Hardstark?

  Aww.

• 25:19Karen Kilgariff?

  My mom and brother took normal pictures and occasionally included me, Weekend at Bernie's style.

• 25:23Georgia Hardstark?

  You have a picture, I can see you have a picture. Oh, my god. Oh, my god.

• 25:26Karen Kilgariff?

  It's the best picture, too. The only thing that I actually remember about that day is waking up on a park bench next to a dog wearing sunglasses.

• 25:35Georgia Hardstark?

  Oh, she's awakened it. Oh, my god.

• 25:37Karen Kilgariff?

  That's her way, she woke up at the end of all that, was like, hey.

• 25:41Georgia Hardstark?

  That is the cutest thing I've ever seen. Wow.

• 25:47Georgia Hardstark?

  Wow.

• 25:48Karen Kilgariff?

  Also, my dad swears he didn't accidentally drug me and that I was just super tired from camping in Yosemite the week prior. Like, yeah. Cheers to the dads that keep our lives interesting and create great memories, even if they're only remembered in photographs. Also, I just completed my advanced certificate in crime analysis.

• 26:05Georgia Hardstark?

  Oh.

• 26:06Karen Kilgariff?

  I also... That girl! That youngster from the park bench! I also have my bachelor's degree in textile science, and I'm hoping to end up in some sort of crime scene analysis textile forensic science situation. Someone once told me that at the FBI, it is someone's job to go up to crime scenes and analyze duct tape and plastic bags that were used in crimes, so maybe that. Cheers to unique career paths. And thank you guys for being such great advocates for these victims and their families. You're both part of the reason why I decided to go back to school in the hopes of using my niche knowledge on textiles and other materials in order to help find evidence and build a case and then advocate and fight for those who no longer can and bring justice to them and their loved ones.

• 26:49Georgia Hardstark?

  Oh, my god.

• 26:50Karen Kilgariff?

  Stay sexy and always remember to buy the non-drowsy meds and then call your dad. XOXO, Lizzie.

• 26:56Georgia Hardstark?

  Aw, Lizzie!

• 26:58Karen Kilgariff?

  Isn't that the best?

• 26:58Georgia Hardstark?

  That's the best. How am I gonna fall... Okay, I have one more.

• 27:02Karen Kilgariff?

  Do you have a dog in sunglasses at the end?

• 27:03Georgia Hardstark?

  No, and that dog, you can tell he's a private investigator, too, right?

• 27:07Karen Kilgariff?

  That dog knows more than he's...

• 27:08Georgia Hardstark?

  Right.

• 27:09Karen Kilgariff?

  He's actually undercover as a stoner.

• 27:11Georgia Hardstark?

  Okay. This is an inheritance of trash parenting. Hello, you're all great, let's go. I said in a story about the time my dad discovered I was scared up his basement and decided that telling me there was a man with machetes down there would be the best way to make me not scared.

• 27:30Karen Kilgariff?

  That's why we didn't read that email, is because that's just child abuse.

• 27:33Georgia Hardstark?

  Right. It says it kind of worked. From then on, he signed all of my Christmas and birthday presents in shaky handwriting from "The Man in the Basement with the Machetes."

• 27:45Georgia Hardstark?

  I don't get it. It sounds like it was a joke, but I don't get it.

• 27:48Karen Kilgariff?

  It's not that funny.

• 27:50Georgia Hardstark?

  It's kind of hilarious.

• 27:52Karen Kilgariff?

  It's the horror of like, there's just so many people loose with children making these independent decisions.

• 27:59Georgia Hardstark?

  Right. I'm gonna pretend like he said it in a hilarious way, like, oh, don't worry about the basement. It's just a man. Okay.

• 28:04Karen Kilgariff?

  Or maybe like the trying to follow it up with funny jokes is like, I really scared her that one time. And now I'm really trying to lighten the, lighten the mood.

• 28:12Georgia Hardstark?

  Who knows? I bring this up to excuse one of my trash parenting moments. In my early 30s, I took my four young children, Jesus, to Astoria, Oregon, because there was a TARDIS in an arcade and they loved Doctor Who. While there, I desperately wanted to look at some of the downtown art galleries. So gathered my children and informed them all that we were going to look with our eyes, not with our hands.

• 28:35Karen Kilgariff?

  Doesn't work.

• 28:35Georgia Hardstark?

  Because the shopkeepers have machetes under the counter to chop off the hands of people who touch the art.

• 28:44Georgia Hardstark?

  In her defense, four fucking kids.

• 28:47Karen Kilgariff?

  By any means necessary, first of all, but I'm so sorry. I just didn't think it was gonna loop around like that.

• 28:53Georgia Hardstark?

  It did.

• 28:55Georgia Hardstark?

  We go into the first shop and my four-year-old walks right up to the older woman working there and asks her if she has a machete.

• 29:04Georgia Hardstark?

  The woman looked confused and asked, why would I have a machete, sweetie? My daughter looked directly into the woman's eyes and made a chopping motion with her hand to her other arm.

• 29:13Karen Kilgariff?

  Yes.

• 29:14Georgia Hardstark?

  The woman looked horrified.

• 29:18Karen Kilgariff?

  A four-year-old.

• 29:19Georgia Hardstark?

  I felt my face go bright right with shame. My 10-year-old daughter rushed forward and said, we're okay. Our family just has a dark sense of humor. Then she steered us all out of the gallery. We spent the rest of the time outside until we went home. I asked my children if they remembered this and none of them did, but they all got a good laugh. Stay sexy and don't resort to baseless machete threats to get your children to act right. Or do. Kel.

• 29:44Karen Kilgariff?

  Cause they work so well, Kel. You gotta admit it.

• 29:50Karen Kilgariff?

  Delightful.

• 29:51Georgia Hardstark?

  In 10 years, we're gonna get an email from the 10-year-old who's a parent who says they used it and it didn't go well.

• 29:57Karen Kilgariff?

  That 10-year-old is gonna be like a world-class artist, or it's like,

• 30:01Georgia Hardstark?

  Right.

• 30:01Karen Kilgariff?

  "Have you seen my machete sculptures? This was my..."

• 30:05Georgia Hardstark?

  I just love machetes.

• 30:06Karen Kilgariff?

  "I love them, and this was an inspirational day for..."

• 30:10Georgia Hardstark?

  Okay, everyone, I think that like, people who are watching on Netflix maybe don't know what we're doing, and we should have maybe said it earlier, but send us your, any kind of story that you have that you think fits with a true crime comedy weird podcast to myfavoritemurder@gmail.

• 30:24Karen Kilgariff?

  Yeah, I mean, it's kind of explained, but it's like, it's just mailbag, so we very early on heard back from our audience so much about so many things, we're like, "Let's get this out there."

• 30:33Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah, we need an episode just for your stories, so we did that.

• 30:36Karen Kilgariff?

  So join us.

• 30:37Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 30:38Karen Kilgariff?

  And stay sexy.

• 30:39Georgia Hardstark?

  And don't get murdered.

• 30:40Karen Kilgariff?

  Goodbye.

• 30:41Speaker 06

  Elvis, do you want a cookie?

• 30:50Karen Kilgariff?

  This has been an Exactly Right production.

• 30:52Georgia Hardstark?

  Our senior producer is Molly Smith, and our associate producer is Tessa Hughes.

• 30:56Karen Kilgariff?

  Our editor is Aristotle Lasevedo.

• 30:58Georgia Hardstark?

  This episode was mixed by Liana Scolacci.

• 31:00Karen Kilgariff?

  Email your hometowns to [email protected].

• 31:03Georgia Hardstark?

  Follow the show on Instagram at MyFavoriteMurder.

• 31:05Karen Kilgariff?

  Listen to My Favorite Murder on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

• 31:10Georgia Hardstark?

  And now you can watch My Favorite Murder on Netflix.

• 31:12Karen Kilgariff?

  And when you're there, hit the double thumbs up and the remind me buttons. That's the best way you can support our show. Goodbye.

• 31:25Georgia Hardstark?

  You know a favorite M-word? Magnesium.

• 31:28Karen Kilgariff?

  Like the kind that's in Dr. Teal's magnesium spray.

• 31:31Georgia Hardstark?

  Made from a proprietary blend of topical minerals, it's designed to relax and prepare you for a night of rest.

• 31:36Karen Kilgariff?

  If you need a reset after your day, make Dr. Teal's magnesium spray part of your nighttime routine.

• 31:41Georgia Hardstark?

  Generously spritz each foot before bed, and you'll be all set. I've actually started doing this, and I'm obsessed with magnesium. It does everything.

• 31:48Karen Kilgariff?

  Something like this is just like, it's simple, it's easy, and it actually works.

• 31:51Georgia Hardstark?

  Totally. For wellness you can feel, find Dr. Teal's magnesium spray online or in your local bath aisle.

• 31:57Karen Kilgariff?

  Goodbye.

• 31:58Georgia Hardstark?

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• 32:04Karen Kilgariff?

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• 32:09Georgia Hardstark?

  A cute, like, flowy dress and a pair of clogs is so timeless.

• 32:13Karen Kilgariff?

  And we got to get some of these clogs.

• 32:16Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 32:16Karen Kilgariff?

  I couldn't believe how cute and comfortable these Reef clogs were. They have the arch support, they have the height, they give you a little bit of height.

• 32:23Georgia Hardstark?

  Yeah.

• 32:23Karen Kilgariff?

  But they're kind of simple. Check out the clogs on reef.com and redeem 15% off your first purchase.

• 32:28Georgia Hardstark?

  Goodbye.

• 32:29Karen Kilgariff?

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• 32:35Georgia Hardstark?

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• 32:41Karen Kilgariff?

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• 32:43Georgia Hardstark?

  Say goodbye to endless scrolling and tab hopping and hello to budget beach bliss at your fingertips.

• 32:48Karen Kilgariff?

  Go to CheapCaribbean.com to try out the Budget Beach Finder and see just how stress-free vacation planning should be.

• 32:55Georgia Hardstark?

  Goodbye.