181: Don't Feel Bad For Being Tired. Be Grateful.

I'm tired right now and I mean that as a blessing, not a complaint. In this solo episode, I'm breaking down why exhaustion is a signal, not a sign to stop, the three types of tired people, and how to flip your mindset when life is full and hard. CHAPTERS: 00:00 Intro 01:27 This season of life 03:44 Mindset shift 12:15 Leadership is behavioral change 21:15 The habit that creates avoidable exhaustion 27:15 Tired is not a sign to stop 34:31 Managing your 24 hours 37:25 The 3 types of tired 43:28 Boys vs. Men 46:41 Go One More ORDER MY BOOK HERE: ⁠https://www.amazon.com/Go-One-More-Intentional-Life-Changing/dp/1637746210 FOLLOW: Become a BPN member FOR FREE - Unlock 25% off FOR LIFE ⁠ https://www.bareperformancenutrition.com/collections/performance-nutrition IG:⁠instagram.com/nickbarefitness/⁠ YT: ⁠youtube.com/@nickbarefitness This podcast is for informational purposes only and should not be considered legal [health or profession] advice. Bare Performance Nutrition (BPN) is not responsible for any losses, damages, or liabilities that may arise from the use of this podcast. This podcast is not intended to replace professional medical advice. This podcast may not be republished without the written consent of Bare Performance Nutrition (BPN)

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:06Nick Bare?

  Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to another episode of the podcast. Today's episode is titled, "Don't Feel Bad For Being Tired. Be Grateful." I shared this message on my Instagram a few days ago. I was mid-run, I was wrapping up a morning six-mile run, part of my morning routine every morning. Alarm clock goes off, 5:00 a.m. I slug my fuel, GUM Sport, GUM Sport Plus. I stand in front of the red light panel and by 5:30 a.m., 30 minutes after waking up,

• 0:49Nick Bare?

  shoes are laced up, sauna is preheating, and I am running. And as I was wrapping up my six-mile run, I was, I was thinking about this topic. It was, it was front of mind for the entire run. And I pulled my, my phone out and I just recorded a clip of me talking about it and I posted it and it connected with a lot of people. Don't feel bad for being tired. Be grateful. What sparked this thought? What sparked this idea?

• 1:30Nick Bare?

  You know, right now, me and my wife, Steph, we are in a, a crazy, busy, chaotic season of life. I'm a husband, I'm a father to two young kids. My daughter's gonna be four years old this summer here in a few weeks. My son's gonna be two years old this summer here in a few weeks. I'll be 36 years old this summer here in a few weeks. Me and my kids' birthdays are all within a month of each other.

• 2:11Nick Bare?

  I'm a business owner, I'm a founder of an organization, a leader of 45 people within this building, this organization. I love the train, I'm an athlete, I'm a son of God. I'm committed to, to a lot of things, a lot of people. I'm responsible for a lot of things, a lot of people. And I feel that weight, I feel that responsibility. And I'm tired right now. That's the truth.

• 2:54Nick Bare?

  In this phase of life, I am tired. They are long days, they are early mornings and they are late nights. And what sparked this, this thought initially was I was sitting in the sauna one night, which Steph and I typically do after we get the kids down for bed. Sitting in the sauna, first breather of the day, first silence of the day, and just let my shoulders kind of sink in a little bit, feeling the heat around me, dropping some water on the rocks to increase the humidity.

• 3:34Nick Bare?

  And I thought to myself, this is an exhausting phase of life. And I say this in all honesty. It is really hard being a committed and dedicated family man, husband, father, ambitious, career-driven individual, but it is so fulfilling. I wouldn't want it any other way. I don't want to be rested in this phase of life. I want to be tired. I'm asking for more tired.

• 4:21Nick Bare?

  And I mean that.

• 4:24Nick Bare?

  So when I say, and I tell you, I'm tired right now. I'm exhausted. That is not a complaint.

• 4:33Nick Bare?

  I'm gonna be very clear. That is not a complaint. It is a reality.

• 4:40Nick Bare?

  And I'm gonna lean in to that. I'm gonna embrace that.

• 4:45Nick Bare?

  You know, some of you guys can resonate or relate to what I'm talking about. You might be in a similar season of life.

• 4:54Nick Bare?

  Where you wake up early. To have a few hours to yourself. To hear training in. To prepare for the day. And then you're getting the kids ready. And you're spending time with the family. And then you go to work and you work really, really hard. And then maybe you find some time to get a second training session in. In that day. Before coming home. And getting dinner prepped. And playing with the kids. And being with the family. To then start bedtime routines and bath time. And then having a few minutes or hours maybe. To yourself or with your partner, your significant other.

• 5:38Nick Bare?

  Your husband, your wife. And then going to sleep after preparing for the next day. To do it all over again. In a few hours.

• 5:50Nick Bare?

  If that's you. I see you. I feel it. And I feel what you're going through. But I see you.

• 6:02Nick Bare?

  And my message here.

• 6:06Nick Bare?

  Is if you're tired.

• 6:10Nick Bare?

  Just like Jaco would say. I'm not gonna try to take credit for this one. Jaco would say, "Good."

• 6:19Nick Bare?

  "Are you tired?" "Yeah, I'm tired." "Good." "That's good." "Me too." So let's keep going.

• 6:30Nick Bare?

  Let's keep leaning in. Rather than feeling bad.

• 6:37Nick Bare?

  For being tired. Or resenting the exhaustion.

• 6:44Nick Bare?

  Flip it on its head. Be grateful.

• 6:50Nick Bare?

  Be grateful. Now, I found myself before, at the end of the day,

• 6:57Nick Bare?

  and I share all this with you, because I have at periods in my life, especially over these last four years since becoming a dad,

• 7:09Nick Bare?

  I have found myself

• 7:12Nick Bare?

  in low moments or periods of time where I have been mad at myself or the circumstances and the situation for being tired, for being exhausted. I have resented the exhaustion that I have experienced.

• 7:33Nick Bare?

  You know, sometimes when you're in it, you want the complete opposite. Not an opposite life, but an opposite feeling. Sometimes when you're extremely tired and exhausted, you just want rest.

• 7:49Nick Bare?

  And then sometimes when I have rest, I don't want the rest. I want the tired. I want the exhausted. Because it is fulfilling. It does feel accomplishing.

• 8:04Nick Bare?

  My call to action, what I would ask you guys to embrace as I am trying to embrace myself, is rather than feeling bad about being tired or resenting the exhaustion, be grateful. Be grateful that your life is full,

• 8:24Nick Bare?

  your schedule is full, your heart is full, your relationships are full,

• 8:31Nick Bare?

  your 24 hours are full.

• 8:35Nick Bare?

  Because that is responsibility that you get to. You have the opportunity and responsibility to steward appropriately.

• 8:43Nick Bare?

  Not everyone is provided that responsibility. Be grateful to have that that responsibility, that obligation.

• 8:55Nick Bare?

  To go and steward properly.

• 9:00Nick Bare?

  I found myself before asking myself at the end of a long day, "Man, why am I so tired? What do I need to change? What's wrong? What do I need to fix? How do I, how do I avoid being tired? How do I fix being tired? How do I fix exhaustion?"

• 9:20Nick Bare?

  And the answer is, nothing is wrong. Nothing needs fixed. Everything is right. Lean in, embrace the season, double down, stay focused, and get really good at saying no to things that don't actually matter.

• 9:46Nick Bare?

  What I want you to hear in this is, if you're in a busy season of life and you're tired, good.

• 9:57Nick Bare?

  Embrace it. Truly. Embrace it. That small mindset shift,

• 10:08Nick Bare?

  that tiny

• 10:11Nick Bare?

  adjustment in your perception of the way you approach being tired and exhaustion, changes everything. Not in days, not in weeks, in seconds. When you truly accept it, when you truly embrace and accept that being tired is good,

• 10:32Nick Bare?

  it will change everything.

• 10:36Nick Bare?

  Now, I'm not here to,

• 10:39Nick Bare?

  to tell you to burn yourself out, to run yourself into the ground, to take on irresponsible amounts of responsibility, or pursue too many opportunities and distractions.

• 10:58Nick Bare?

  That's not what I'm saying at all, by any means. I'm not saying go do as much as possible, run yourself into the ground, take on more, more, more, more, so you can unintentionally be tired and be exhausted just for the sake of being tired and exhausted. If being tired and exhausted is a byproduct of stewarding your responsibilities and obligations and owning it and showing up for your priorities as a byproduct, if you are tired and exhausted, as Jaka would say, good. You're doing your job. But don't pursue all these things

• 11:40Nick Bare?

  just to be tired and exhausted. I hope that makes sense. If tired and exhausted is a byproduct of you showing up for your priorities and responsibilities, good. But if you are pursuing opportunities and distractions just for the sake of being tired and exhausted, bad. There's good, there's right, there's bad, there's wrong.

• 12:18Nick Bare?

  I'm here to recognize and be real that sometimes part of being tired is just part of the process. Embrace it. You know, one of the things I've learned this last year is you have to be careful with who you allow to influence your life. The word influence is really interesting.

• 12:51Nick Bare?

  You know, I've been reading a lot of John Maxwell stuff this past year.

• 12:57Nick Bare?

  The Bible that I read right now, I get this question a lot, the Bible that I read is John Maxwell's Leadership Bible. It's my favorite. I love it.

• 13:11Nick Bare?

  It has these very well articulated thoughts and comparisons and just blocks of additional texts throughout

• 13:27Nick Bare?

  to help you interpret part of scripture and apply that to leadership. And one of the ways that John Maxwell describes leadership is that leadership is influence.

• 13:40Nick Bare?

  Influence can be good or bad, but true influence

• 13:47Nick Bare?

  can facilitate a behavioral change in a person or people.

• 13:55Nick Bare?

  If you follow someone

• 13:58Nick Bare?

  and based off of their level of leadership, if they have influence over you, they have the ability to change your behaviors. You will change your behaviors based off of their influence and leadership. What they do, what they don't do, what they prefer, how they think, how they act, how they speak.

• 14:27Nick Bare?

  Real leadership has influence and that influence is much more than inspiring you to make a purchase on a certain website

• 14:39Nick Bare?

  or buy a certain thing. It is behavioral change.

• 14:46Nick Bare?

  It has compounding and ripple effects throughout your entire life.

• 14:53Nick Bare?

  But you have to be very careful and watchful

• 14:59Nick Bare?

  for who you allow to influence your life. Who you allow to speak into you that facilitates behavioral change.

• 15:11Nick Bare?

  I've had some really strong leaders in my life, very strong mentors who have positively influenced me to make positive behavioral change.

• 15:26Nick Bare?

  And on the flip side, I've also had some

• 15:30Nick Bare?

  some leaders who I won't say were bad leaders, but they have influenced me to make behavioral change that wasn't in the best interest of me, but may have been in the best entrance interest of them.

• 15:52Nick Bare?

  The wrong mentor, leader, or influential person in your life, whether this just a guide, a coach, a teacher, a friend, they can make you stronger,

• 16:08Nick Bare?

  but they can also make you weaker and softer.

• 16:15Nick Bare?

  So to be very careful with who you allow to lead you, speak into you, influence you,

• 16:26Nick Bare?

  that will guide you into the person you are becoming and who you become.

• 16:33Nick Bare?

  An example of that is I had

• 16:38Nick Bare?

  a mentor in my life who for quite some time

• 16:45Nick Bare?

  made me believe, influenced me to believe that

• 16:50Nick Bare?

  being tired and being exhausted was was wrong. Because I was tired, because I was exhausted, I was doing something wrong.

• 17:03Nick Bare?

  I was prioritizing the wrong things. I wasn't creating enough boundaries. I was too ambitious. I was pursuing too many opportunities.

• 17:16Nick Bare?

  And I believed it for a period of time.

• 17:22Nick Bare?

  And as I made behavioral change and tried to do less and prioritize less and pursue less opportunity because I was wanting more rest, I was wanting more recovery. I didn't want to be tired. I didn't want to be exhausted. I wasn't stewarding my responsibilities appropriately.

• 17:53Nick Bare?

  And as I kind of pulled the covers back a little bit, you know, this specific mentor in my life at the time, great individual who I have a lot of respect for and I admire and I love, but they were in a different season of life than me. They were married, yes, similar to me, but they didn't have kids. And they weren't a leader or an executive or founder of a business. They didn't have to work as many hours as I had to work. They didn't have as many responsibilities as I have responsibilities. And I was being mentored

• 18:35Nick Bare?

  and coached by someone who didn't understand or cannot relate to the responsibilities that I have and I had. You know, whether you have kids or not, we all have responsibilities.

• 18:53Nick Bare?

  But I will say, once I became a dad and I have two kids, my kids are getting older,

• 19:00Nick Bare?

  my responsibilities have increased significantly, significantly. The life that I lived before having kids versus the life that I live now after having kids, completely different lives.

• 19:13Nick Bare?

  I have a different purpose.

• 19:17Nick Bare?

  My schedule is different. My 24 hours in a day are different.

• 19:23Nick Bare?

  I have less time for me. I want to be with my family more. I don't want to travel as much. I love spending time with my family. I love my life now.

• 19:37Nick Bare?

  I'm not saying it's easy by any means, but I love the responsibility that I have. The responsibilities that I am called to steward appropriately.

• 19:49Nick Bare?

  But if you allow yourself to be coached and led and mentored by someone who doesn't understand your season of life, who can't relate,

• 20:00Nick Bare?

  and tries to lead, coach, or mentor you in a way when they don't understand your own responsibilities because they haven't been there themselves, I think that is a dangerous place to be.

• 20:15Nick Bare?

  To make it a little bit simpler,

• 20:18Nick Bare?

  if you follow someone online

• 20:23Nick Bare?

  and their life circumstances or situations and schedule and routine responsibilities are very different from yours,

• 20:33Nick Bare?

  you have to take what they say and their advice with a grain of salt. There are certain things you might be able to apply to your life and there are certain things you might not be able to apply to your life.

• 20:45Nick Bare?

  You be careful. If you watchful, you have to be intentional

• 20:51Nick Bare?

  with who you allow to influence you

• 20:56Nick Bare?

  based off of your own individual responsibilities. You know, as I was previously talking about.

• 21:05Nick Bare?

  There's a difference between being tired and exhausted when it's a byproduct of the effort and the work that you are showing up for versus when you just pursue being tired and exhausted because it feels fulfilling for the sake of fulfillment. One of the things that I've struggled with that I believe and I hope I'm getting better at is overcommitting to things that I shouldn't have committed to. The call to action here is don't commit to things you can't commit to. We've all been here before and will be again.

• 21:50Nick Bare?

  I've made this mistake many times before and I'm gonna make it again. I believe I'm getting better, but only time will tell. I have found myself and still do to this day overcommitting to things. And by the time they come around of these things that I committed to, I can't do it anymore. I don't want to do it anymore. And I regret the previous commitment to saying I would go do the thing. So I've put a lot of focus, and I still am, trying to get better at setting boundaries,

• 22:32Nick Bare?

  politely saying no from the beginning, and protecting my priorities. You know, I don't want to be known as the guy that always bails. I don't want to be that guy. So I'm trying to get better at committing to less so I can show up for my priorities more.

• 22:56Nick Bare?

  I would say the last couple of years, I got really good at bailing on things.

• 23:05Nick Bare?

  So in the moment, I would say yes to everything and anything. I would over commit. I'd over commit my time, my energy, my responsibility to everything that looked like an opportunity. Yeah, I'll go on this business dinner, I'll go on this travel trip for work. I'll be on this podcast, I'll be part of this project, I'll be in this meeting, I'll be the point of contact for X, Y, and Z. I used to do that.

• 23:40Nick Bare?

  And I found myself over committing to a lot. And by the time that commitment came around, like, oh crap, I did say yes to this.

• 23:51Nick Bare?

  I did tell them I would travel on this work trip. I did say I'd be on this podcast.

• 23:59Nick Bare?

  And I found myself bailing one thing after another, after another, after another. And I don't want to be known as a person who is unreliable.

• 24:11Nick Bare?

  I don't want to commit and then bail and then have that mark on me as that's the guy who you can't rely on. When he says he's going to be there, you can't trust him. I don't want to be that person.

• 24:27Nick Bare?

  That's an easy way to set yourself up for exhaustion and being tired. That's self sabotage. You do that to yourself. I've done that to myself. I'm tired and exhausted because I have committed to too many things that I can't appropriately show up for and manage with the God given energy that I have.

• 24:53Nick Bare?

  This is a practice you can put in place today. Stop over committing. When you stop over committing to the things that you shouldn't do, you can't do, you don't want to do, then your list of to do things, your priorities get smaller and smaller and smaller and you can put more energy and focus on those things.

• 25:20Nick Bare?

  You have heard of the quote and the phrase before, "Go an inch wide and a mile deep", as opposed to a mile wide and an inch deep. If I look at my responsibilities in life, I'm trying to simplify

• 25:40Nick Bare?

  how much I'm doing, how many priorities I have. I want to make my focus smaller and smaller and smaller,

• 25:50Nick Bare?

  not so that I can do whatever I want to do and have all of this free time and just chill. I want my focus to be tight. I want my responsibility and priorities to be tight and smaller so that I can go a mile deep on those things.

• 26:09Nick Bare?

  So at the end of the day, when I put my head on the pillow and I am exhausted, I am tired, I know that the things that I am working on, that ring of focus, those responsibilities, I'm making meaningful impact in those areas of my life.

• 26:32Nick Bare?

  Commit to less, but on the things that you commit to, go a mile deep.

• 26:41Nick Bare?

  And the byproduct will be being tired. It should be being exhausted because you're putting everything you got into those few things, as opposed to just skimming the surface on a few.

• 27:01Nick Bare?

  Being tired is not a sign to stop.

• 27:07Nick Bare?

  I think we're taught that.

• 27:12Nick Bare?

  Especially right now.

• 27:16Nick Bare?

  Especially in the fitness wellness space. I'm just thinking about this now, but I I posted this workout

• 27:30Nick Bare?

  online yesterday, which is a pretty normal back training routine that I've been doing for like no exaggeration, decades.

• 27:43Nick Bare?

  It's no surprise that I love to train.

• 27:46Nick Bare?

  I love to run. I love to lift weights.

• 27:51Nick Bare?

  I love high volume. And I love intensity when necessary.

• 27:59Nick Bare?

  I have trained higher volume for many years.

• 28:07Nick Bare?

  My body handles it well. I get a lot out of it. And for me, I'm not the type of person who wants to just get a workout done with.

• 28:17Nick Bare?

  I'm not the type of person who is going to go into the gym for 15 minutes, do a few sets, call it a day and get out.

• 28:25Nick Bare?

  I love being in the gym. I love training.

• 28:29Nick Bare?

  I love taking 60 minutes and spending all of those 60 minutes getting after it, throwing down. And I shared this workout yesterday,

• 28:40Nick Bare?

  which like I said, it was a pretty typical back training workout. It was seven movements.

• 28:47Nick Bare?

  It was some pull down movements, pull ups,

• 28:53Nick Bare?

  rows, bicep curls, chin ups, seven movements, three to four sets per movement. And there are multiple comments in DM saying, this is too much. This is too much volume.

• 29:10Nick Bare?

  Says who?

• 29:13Nick Bare?

  And I've been training like this for years and years and years and I love it.

• 29:18Nick Bare?

  Maybe you don't like to train with this much volume, or maybe you're not trained to that level to be able to handle that much volume.

• 29:25Nick Bare?

  But are who are you to say that's too much?

• 29:30Nick Bare?

  Well, you're going to be tired. You're going to be exhausted. You're going to work too hard.

• 29:38Nick Bare?

  That's the problem.

• 29:42Nick Bare?

  You're afraid of the work.

• 29:46Nick Bare?

  Yes, there are points of diminishing return. You can overtrain and underrecover by doing too much, too much volume, too much intensity, too much repetition.

• 30:01Nick Bare?

  But just because you are tired does not mean it's a sign to stop.

• 30:10Nick Bare?

  No, no, no, no.

• 30:12Nick Bare?

  It's a signal. It's not a sign, it's a signal

• 30:17Nick Bare?

  to reflect.

• 30:19Nick Bare?

  When you are tired, when you are exhausted, is a signal to reflect, to take a tactical pause and assess your goals, your priorities, and where or what you are spending your time.

• 30:37Nick Bare?

  When I'm sitting in the sauna at night, after a long day, putting the kids down, preparing for the next day.

• 30:46Nick Bare?

  If I'm extra tired or extra exhausted, I take a tactical pause.

• 30:54Nick Bare?

  That time in the sauna, that is my reset time.

• 30:58Nick Bare?

  Let me assess what I'm saying yes to, what I'm saying no to right now. Let me assess my priorities. Let me assess my goals. Let me assess where and what I'm spending my time on.

• 31:13Nick Bare?

  And if there's something that I'm pursuing that shouldn't be a priority,

• 31:18Nick Bare?

  that's an opportunity for me to remove, minimize, or eliminate.

• 31:25Nick Bare?

  If I am spending my time or doing something that is

• 31:32Nick Bare?

  digging me deeper into a hole,

• 31:37Nick Bare?

  it has diminishing return, negative effects, or it isn't getting me anywhere. It's time to reassess and replan and reattack.

• 31:50Nick Bare?

  I think too many people, once they get tired, they stop.

• 31:56Nick Bare?

  I don't want to push it too hard. I don't want to push it too far. I need rest. I need recovery. I am not here to say rest and recovery and sleep is not important. Because I know people are going to hear what I'm talking about and they're going to take it the completely opposite and wrong way. I'm not saying that.

• 32:14Nick Bare?

  I, I believe in sleep. I believe in rest. I believe in recovery, but there are seasons. There are times when it's not an option.

• 32:26Nick Bare?

  There are seasons, there are times when being tired and being exhausted is part of the process. And you just have to lean in and suck it up and embrace the suck.

• 32:40Nick Bare?

  That's the truth. There's no way around it sometimes.

• 32:46Nick Bare?

  I'm not here to tell you that

• 32:50Nick Bare?

  it's not okay to rest and recover when you are tired. I'm not saying that.

• 32:57Nick Bare?

  What I'm saying is sometimes you don't have a choice. And you gotta double down and lean in and go one more

• 33:07Nick Bare?

  based off of the season of life you're in, your responsibilities, your goals, your priorities. Sometimes you don't have a choice to stop.

• 33:19Nick Bare?

  Because being tired is not a sign to stop. It is a signal to reflect and reassess and re-attack. It's a blessing to be tired.

• 33:31Nick Bare?

  Truly.

• 33:33Nick Bare?

  It's a blessing to be able to work towards something. It's a blessing to be able to pursue. I feel blessed every single day

• 33:48Nick Bare?

  that I have been called to be

• 33:54Nick Bare?

  a husband, a leader, a father.

• 33:59Nick Bare?

  That responsibility is really heavy on me.

• 34:05Nick Bare?

  I feel blessed to be able to carry and steward that responsibility.

• 34:17Nick Bare?

  Now, we all have 24 hours in a day.

• 34:21Nick Bare?

  But I'm not one to sit here and tell you, we all have the same 24 hours.

• 34:30Nick Bare?

  Everyone's life is different.

• 34:35Nick Bare?

  Some of us have kids, some of us don't. Some are married, some are not. Some have high, demanding,

• 34:46Nick Bare?

  hard, manual, labored jobs, and some don't. Some people work, and some don't. Some people have million dollars in the bank, and some have zero. We all have different circumstances. We're all in different situations.

• 35:05Nick Bare?

  But we all do have 24 hours. They're not the same 24 hours.

• 35:11Nick Bare?

  But with our circumstances, and our individual situations, we have

• 35:20Nick Bare?

  we have to be accountable and manage our 24 hours responsibly.

• 35:30Nick Bare?

  I'm not comparing my 24 hours to yours, and you're not comparing your 24 hours to mine. I'm not looking at my neighbor. I'm not looking at my coworkers. I'm not looking at my friends to say, "Oh, must be nice." Like, "You live a different life." "Must be nice." Like, "You go home and your responsibilities end once you leave work." No, cut that crap. There's no comparing my 24 hours to anyone else's. But it's my job to manage my 24 hours.

• 36:06Nick Bare?

  When am I gonna sleep? When am I gonna work? When am I gonna train? When am I gonna spend time with my family?

• 36:15Nick Bare?

  When am I gonna prepare food? When am I gonna run errands? When am I gonna do all the things that I want and have to do in my 24 hours and make it happen?

• 36:30Nick Bare?

  And as your life responsibilities increase, just like in the season of life I'm in right now,

• 36:37Nick Bare?

  I have to be more strict and rigid and ruthless

• 36:43Nick Bare?

  in the way that I show up and manage my 24 hours.

• 36:50Nick Bare?

  So I'm not here to compare my life to yours or your life to mine.

• 36:57Nick Bare?

  But what I am saying is we all have the responsibility to manage our 24 hours based off our life circumstances and situation.

• 37:10Nick Bare?

  There's three types of tired people. And I've labeled them appropriately. The first is the lazy procrastinator. The second is the play it safe reservist. And the third is the ambitious warrior. There's three ways to be tired. The first, the lazy procrastinator.

• 37:36Nick Bare?

  This person is tired because they don't take care of themselves.

• 37:45Nick Bare?

  They don't take care of their mind, their body, or their spirit.

• 37:53Nick Bare?

  They don't manage their 24 hours appropriately. They don't challenge themselves. They don't force themselves to become resilient in the face of a hardship or a challenge.

• 38:12Nick Bare?

  They're not pushing themselves. They're not growing. They're not filling their day with purposeful, passionate, hard things.

• 38:23Nick Bare?

  The lazy procrastinator is a person who wastes time watching movies and playing video games and doesn't prepare their foods. And when they're at work, they're not getting enough work done, so they get home late. They don't spend time with their family because they stayed at work late because they didn't get the things they have to get done. So then they have to get caught up on work at night and they don't work out because they didn't plan appropriately. And over time, it is this snowball effect that gets worse and worse and worse over time. The lazy procrastinator is a person who doesn't take ownership of their 24 hours.

• 39:08Nick Bare?

  And they are tired because they are not growing. They are not taking care of their health or their fitness. They're exhausted because they are unhealthy physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually.

• 39:30Nick Bare?

  The second type of tired is the play it safe reservist. They're tired because they are well rested. There's wasted potential.

• 39:45Nick Bare?

  And they neglect their calling to steward their talents.

• 39:51Nick Bare?

  They play it safe.

• 39:54Nick Bare?

  There's opportunity in which they could grow, they could get better.

• 40:01Nick Bare?

  But they like being rested. They like being recovered.

• 40:08Nick Bare?

  They don't want to sacrifice what they have for the welfare of other people in their community, their family, or themselves. They just play it safe.

• 40:24Nick Bare?

  And they're tired because they're not growing. They're not exceeding. They just plateau. They live, they live right in the middle. There's no tick down, there's no tick up.

• 40:40Nick Bare?

  They play it safe.

• 40:43Nick Bare?

  And the third type of tired, which is the tired that I want to be and that I am. And for many of you listening to this podcast, it's probably you too. It's the ambitious warrior.

• 40:55Nick Bare?

  They are tired. You are tired because you're putting in the work. You want to reach your potential.

• 41:04Nick Bare?

  You are managing your 24 hour day appropriately where it is stacked. You're waking up early. You're taking care of your body, your mind, your spirit. You're showing up for your work. You're excelling, you're setting really hard ambitious goals and you're chasing them down. You're carving out time for your family to show up and be present. You're saying no to a lot of unnecessary opportunities.

• 41:34Nick Bare?

  I say no to a lot of stuff personally and professionally. So I can show up for my real priorities.

• 41:43Nick Bare?

  The ambitious warrior wakes up and thinks, if it matters to me, I will make time.

• 41:51Nick Bare?

  I got 24 hours. If it matters to me, I'm making time today.

• 41:56Nick Bare?

  That might mean I'm sleeping less.

• 42:01Nick Bare?

  This might mean I'm waking up early. I'm staying up later. This might mean that I'm saying no to all these other luxury items and things and places that I wanted to do or experience.

• 42:16Nick Bare?

  Because if it matters to you, you will make time.

• 42:21Nick Bare?

  There's three types of tired. Which one do you want to be? The lazy procrastinator? The play it safe reservist? Or the ambitious warrior?

• 42:33Nick Bare?

  This past week, I was listening to a really good sermon by my friend Pastor Noah Heron. He's from Way Church in Nashville, Tennessee. He planted that church.

• 42:48Nick Bare?

  And the title of the sermon was called "How to Be a Godly Dad."

• 42:55Nick Bare?

  And he was talking about the difference between a boy and a man. And I've heard many different takes on this before. And I've often found that pastors do a really good job at describing the difference between a boy and a man.

• 43:13Nick Bare?

  And the way he broke it down and described it is that a boy consumes while a man sacrifices.

• 43:24Nick Bare?

  A boy thinks, "What do I get out of this?

• 43:29Nick Bare?

  What are you gonna do for me? How do I win? What do I get? How much am I gonna get paid? Where's the transaction?" So on and so forth. Consumption. Boys consume.

• 43:44Nick Bare?

  What makes a man different? Is it a man sacrifices?

• 43:50Nick Bare?

  He's not thinking, "What can they do for me? What can I get out of this?" It is, "How do I make myself smaller to serve the people around me?"

• 44:04Nick Bare?

  A man, which is different from a boy, is a selfless servant. Sacrifice.

• 44:16Nick Bare?

  Being a dad is the most important part of my life.

• 44:21Nick Bare?

  Easily.

• 44:24Nick Bare?

  But it does not give me a free pass on practicing a lazy life. There's always a joke about like the dad bod. I can promise you I'll never have a dad bod. I can, I can promise you that.

• 44:41Nick Bare?

  I've met a lot of guys, some boys, some men, who as soon as they became a dad, it's almost like it, it allowed them to embrace the dad life of becoming lazy in all these other areas and aspects of their life. I'm a dad now, so I can eat a crap diet and it's accepted. I'm a dad now, so I can gain the weight. I'm a dad now, so I don't have to work out as much as I used to.

• 45:14Nick Bare?

  Well, no, that's not how the ambitious warrior shows up because if it matters to you, you will make time.

• 45:23Nick Bare?

  Training matters to me. Being healthy matters to me. Being fit matters to me. I will sacrifice sleep and energy so I can make time for myself in the morning.

• 45:40Nick Bare?

  So that then I can commit the rest of the hours of my day to my family, my wife and my kids.

• 45:53Nick Bare?

  The difference between a boy and a man, a boy consumes, a man sacrifices.

• 46:04Nick Bare?

  Part of what you will sacrifice in the pursuit and the purpose of being a man to serve others,

• 46:15Nick Bare?

  you're sacrificing at some times in, in seasons of life, rest and recovery.

• 46:27Nick Bare?

  Don't feel bad for being tired.

• 46:33Nick Bare?

  Be grateful.

• 46:35Nick Bare?

  Because to be tired is a blessing. If it is a byproduct of pursuing your purpose and your mission.

• 46:46Nick Bare?

  To serve.

• 46:49Nick Bare?

  And in my case, to be a man. To transition from the boy to the man. From consumption to sacrifice.

• 47:02Nick Bare?

  So if you're tired, if you're exhausted, if you're working hard, if you feel like you're burning the candle from both ends to show up for your priorities and your responsibilities. I see you.

• 47:16Nick Bare?

  I'm here with you.

• 47:18Nick Bare?

  I'm proud of you.

• 47:20Nick Bare?

  So lean in, double down, and go one more.