Hey Guys, There’s Mice in this One!! (Herodotus The Histories Book 2, Part 4)

We are finally at the end of book 2 of Herodotus' Histories!! Yaayy!! Go us, it took us a bit, but it was such a fun little journey full of insanity and hippos that are definitly not hippos and perhaps just a horse chillin in the lake but no I need to let this go. It's too much. Thank you all for joining me on another adventure into the world of Herodotus! Can't wait to share more with you when I do. Submit your question for the next Q&A via email http://mythsbaby.com/questions or a voice note https://www.speakpipe.com/LTAMB. Get ad-free episodes and so, so much more, by subscribing to the Oracle Edition at patreon.com/mythsbaby http://patreon.com/mythsbaby. Enter our podcast guest https://www.mythsbaby.com/contact form if you'd like to be on the show as a conversation guest! CW/TW: far too many Greek myths involve assault. I try to provide direct warnings when there is reference to anything with overtly traumatic themes but be aware that Greek mythology regularly features assault, death, and many other potentially triggering events. Sources: Herodotus The Histories translated by Tom Holland. Attributions and licensing information for music used in the podcast can be found here:mythsbaby.com/sources-attributions http://mythsbaby.com/sources-attributions. Learn more about Liv's next group trips https://travelbugxlivalbert.my.canva.site/ to GREECE! Application deadline is November 30 (Subject to change due to demand). Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy https://acast.com/privacy for more information.

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Liv Albert?

  Hey nerds, really quick note from me. I want to tell you that we now have the applications open for the next set of listener group trips. This is us going back to the original, the trips that we have held in the past that have been so much fun, so successful and pretty affordable in terms of wandering around Greece with a bunch of nerds. So check out the details and get your applications in at mythsbaby.com grouptrip.

• 0:43Speaker 01

  Hey, we're Nick and Jack, hosts of The Best One Yet. Behind every episode, there's research, emails, spreadsheets and our shared Google Doc, the headline hammer. With Google Workspace with Gemini, Google's AI is built right into the premium versions of tools we already use, like Gmail, Docs and Sheets. No new tools or extra logins, just personalized AI for the way we work. That means less time on the work around the work and more time finding the stories worth talking about. Get AI tools for work. Upgrade to Google Workspace with Gemini at goo.gle/workspacewithgemini. That's goo.gle/workspacewithgemini.

• 1:18Speaker 02

  At Lowe's, this Veterans Day and every day, military members, veterans and their spouses get automatic Milo's Rewards Silver Status Benefits. Plus, 10% off eligible purchases with no annual limit. It's one way we honor and give back to those who have served and still do. Learn more and verify now at lowe's.com/military. 10% discount can't be combined with another offer. Exclusions, terms and conditions apply. Loyalty program subject to terms and conditions. Details at lowe's.com/terms. Subject to change.

• 2:17Speaker 03

  Good morning, everyone, and welcome back to another episode of Let's Talk About Myths, Baby. It's Michaela Pangoish, here to tell you about the last little bit of Herodotus's The Histories Book Two. We are finishing off looking at the history of Egypt. Back two weeks ago now, we were finishing up the last little bit of Egyptian culture, as told by Herodotus, and then started looking at the history that he learned from various priests and people he met along the way, which was very fun and in no way ridiculous at all. But maybe I'm being a little harsh on Herodotus, and there's actually quite a bit to say about Herodotus, his sources, and also the time when he was writing. I am unfortunately not

• 2:59Speaker 03

  as well-knowledge'd in this as I would like to be, because it's a little all over the place, but I've been looking into it some more because of the Greek class I'm currently in, and I also just got home from that midterm. I'm tired, very full of Herodotus. Anyways, did you know that there is actually discourse in academia that Herodotus was probably writing much later than we originally thought? In fact, he may even have been more contemporaneous with Thucydides than we thought originally. There is an idea that he could have been writing and telling these stories during the time of Pericles, or maybe even after, and the message of his stories changes drastically depending on which period this is. I don't

• 3:41Speaker 03

  feel like I'm explaining this best, and that's okay, because I do have plans of getting someone on the show to talk about this, but that will be after this semester is over, unfortunately, because I'm busy, and so is he, and that's okay. Regardless, we are continuing on with the narrative today, and going to finish up the history of Egypt as told by Herodotus. There's more in here about kings, well, pharaohs, I guess. We are in Egypt, after all, so why don't we get into it already? Enough of my yapping.

• 4:24Speaker 03

  Hey guys, there's mice in this one. Herodotus the Histories, Book Two, Part Four.

• 4:44Speaker 03

  So last we left off, we were looking at a couple of pharaohs who were not very well liked by the Egyptian people. They closed all the temples and forced all of the people to work for them to build the pyramids. They were single-minded, it seemed. One also forced his daughter into prostitution so that he could fund his pyramid building habit, which, you know, is a great move by a father, I guess. But we are moving on from these guys and heading to the next pharaoh named Mykarenis, or Menkare, who was the son of Hiyops, but pretty against all that his father stood for and was doing. He wasn't a fan of his old man. Firstly, Mykarenis opened up all the shrines that were closed,

• 5:27Speaker 03

  and the Egyptians went back to the way of life they then enjoyed before all the restrictions were placed upon them. He was apparently a pretty good judge, and by that I mean pretty fair for all things considered. Well enough that people were happy with any of his judgments, and that's a positive in his favor, I guess. To add to this, if anyone was ever unhappy with one of his verdicts, he allowed compensation to come from his own estates. Which I don't actually believe for a second, but I'll let it pass. He was liked, okay? He did have some issues in the category of having children. He had one daughter, who Herodotus does not give us the name of, of course, but she passed away young.

• 6:10Speaker 03

  He was racked with grief. He couldn't function at all. This was the worst for them. He had a wooden coffin made in the form of a cow, where he placed her body, and then it was covered in gold. He didn't bury this in the ground or place it within a pyramid, but instead had it kept in the city. In Herodotus's day, he claims it could even be seen in the city of Sais, inside the palace in a well-decorated room with plenty of incense burning day and night. And in the room beside it are twenty statues of Mykarenis's concubines, naked. Because choices, yet he goes on about this. He says that others tell a different story. One where Mykarenus had a deep, deep lust for his daughter and raped her.

• 6:53Speaker 03

  She was distressed, obviously, and then hung herself. Mykarenus had her buried and cut off the hands of the slaves who had brought her to him. And these slaves with their hands cut off are actually the twenty statues seen in the other room. Herodotus doesn't believe this story, and for my own sanity, I would like to agree with him. Because just once, I want a story from antiquity where a father adored his daughter and treated her with the utmost love and respect. Anyways, he goes on to say that the cow stays indoors all throughout the year except for on one day. On this day, there was a festival to a god who he refuses to name. He believes it would be disrespectful to do so in this context. And the cow is brought out in a procession before the pupils.

• 7:37Speaker 03

  Another calamity that struck this poor man is because of an oracle, because of course it is. Well, the oracle from Buto, you know, the one Toledo apparently comes by and tells Mykarenus that he was going to die in six years. Mykarenus was not pleased about this oracle. He said as thus to the oracle, "Why, oh why would the god let me die when I've been so pious, so good? But he allowed my father and uncle to live so long despite them being super sucky?" I get it, Mykarenus, that does suck. Well, the oracle snaps back. "Yeah, of course, because you all failed to realize what was happening. Egypt was to be afflicted by evil for a hundred and fifty years."

• 8:22Speaker 03

  Mykarenus went, "Fair enough, I guess that's that." But he had a plan, because of course he did. He had hundreds upon hundreds of lamps made and ensured that they were lit all night long so that technically, it was never actually nighttime. By doing this, he would double the amount of time left. Instead of six years, he would have twelve. Doesn't that make sense? He also built a pyramid out of Ethiopian stone. I refuse to say the dimensions. I'm done with the dimensions. I'm not talking about dimensions. Was I even to begin with? No, but I refuse even more so now. He says that the Greeks believed that this pyramid was made by Rodopis. But who was Rhodopis? Herodotus and I are so glad you asked, so let's talk about it.

• 9:08Speaker 03

  She was a courtesan who lived during the reign of Amasis, which is significantly later than the period of time we are talking about. She was a Thracian woman and owned by a Samian man named Iadmon, who was also the master of Asaph. Yeah, that Asaph, of the fables fame. She came to Egypt and was "put to work", air quotes there, we know what that means. And she did this until she was released from it by a Mytilene man named Caraxus, the son of Scamandrianmus, or better known as the brother of Sappho. Bet you didn't see that coming, how fun is that? Who thought Sappho was gonna make an appearance in this? She does.

• 9:50Speaker 03

  Well, Rhodopis newly freed, decided to stay in Egypt and continue sex work, where she eventually became exceptionally wealthy. Good for her. But Herodotus does clarify wealthy by sex work standards, not wealthy enough to build a pyramid. That would be ridiculous. She did have some very nice spits, sense of Delphi, as, I don't know, memory for her, I guess? Something for her to be remembered by, with her names on? They could roast things, I don't know. He ends this section with saying that after Caraxus had brought Rhodopis, bought Rhodopis her freedom, he headed on home to Mytilene where, and I quote, "He was roundly mocked by Sappho in one of her poems."

• 10:31Speaker 03

  The next pharaoh is a man named Asikis, or Shepsescaf, from the Egyptian records. He added to the temple of Hephaestus, "A wonderfully beautiful gate, which none could rival." But it was also a time of financial crisis in Egypt. Apparently now, if an Egyptian wanted to take out a loan, he could only do it on the assurance of his father's corpse. Basically, if he couldn't repay it, his daddy would be dug up. Which is a no bueno. Asikis also made a pyramid, this one out of brick, with an inscription saying, "Do not think to compare me unfavorably to the pyramids of stone, for just as Zeus excels the other gods, I excel them."

• 11:15Speaker 03

  "A pole was pushed down into a lake, mud clung to this pole. The mud was then scooped up, and the fruit of this mud is bricks. And that is how I came to be made." That's enough about him. Next, we have Anesius, who was blind. And fled into the marshes when the Ethiopians came into Egypt unto their king, Sabakos. So that's enough of Anesius for now. Now, for the next fifty years, the Ethiopians ruled Egypt. And the king Sabakos did stuff and things, like raising the cities, like physically raising the cities up a bit. And changing the death penalty. So instead of killing someone, they just had to go serve a sentence for

• 11:58Speaker 03

  whatever amount of time in their home state, something like that. Well. We're not talking about the Ethiopians, though. We're talking about Egypt, and they can't be around forever. In fact, I just said they were there for fifty years. So, the end of the rule of the Ethiopians was foretold in a dream. Apparently, a man came to Sabakos in his dream and told him to assemble all the priests and then cut them in half. Which seems sacrilegious, but what do I know? He went, this is a trick. I'm not gonna do it. Plus, I have my own oracles back home and they said I would only rule Egypt for fifty years. So, you know what? I think it's my time. So he left.

• 12:38Speaker 03

  And then, and then Anesius just walked out of the marshes and got back to ruling as he was. That's that. The next king, so this one was Setos, so Seti the first, and he was a priest, a Hephaestus. I need more information on the gods of Egypt and specifically which Egyptian god matches on to which Greek god because that would be super interesting for one, and also because this, you know, whatever the god is being matched to Hephaestus seems really interesting and really important. Could I Google it? Yes. Am I going to? No. Anyways, Setos, he was a bit rude to the warrior class in Egypt. He felt that they were unnecessary for his life.

• 13:19Speaker 03

  He confiscated their land and then, well, when Egypt was invaded by the Arabians and Assyrians, he didn't have an army. But don't you worry, Setos went to the god in the sanctuary, explained what was happening, bewailing his current position and troubles. And then the god just appeared to him. He imagined, as such, at least, and the god said, "Don't you worry bud, I got you, I'll send people." So Sethos went, yep, seems legit, and went out to meet the invading force by himself. On his way, he enlisted every Egyptian he could find that was willing, and eventually set up camp at Pelusia. His army was full of merchants, artisans, shark keepers, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.

• 14:02Speaker 03

  Not really the best people for fighting, but during the night, as everyone rested, a horde of mice ran out of the, went out into the invading forces camp, and nibbled away at the bows and the straps on their shields, so much so that they were completely unusable. And because the enemies felt that they could no longer defend themselves, they skedoodle on off. So Sethos made a statue of himself, holding a field mouse, and had it placed in the sanctuary. I like that story, actually.

• 14:32Speaker 03

  All of these accounts up to this point have come from the records found in Egypt with the priests. During the many years that their records hold, not once did a god appear in the land. This is fun information, anyways, there was one guy, Hecateus, who claims that he was a descendant of a god. He discovered this because he was interested in genealogy, but like, that's, that's it. Yet, apparently, at some point in the far past, gods ruled Egypt and walked among men. The last Herodotus tell us, tells us, was Horus, or Apollo, who was the son of Osiris, or Dionysus. But about these gods, well, the Greeks say that Heracles, Dionysus, and Pan are the youngest of the gods.

• 15:15Speaker 03

  But the Egyptians say that Pan is one of the original gods, one of the primal divinities, one of the eight, as the Egyptians refer to them. Dionysus was, according to the Egyptians, born sixteen hundred years before. Heracles, Alcmene's son, nine hundred, and Pan, the son of Penelope, and Penelope and Hermes in some traditions, eight hundred years ago. Herodotus gives us his thoughts on this, because of course he did. He feels that the Greeks picked up the names of these gods later than the other gods, which then allowed the Greeks to have a starting point for their own genealogies. A time later than these gods originally appeared within the Egyptian sources.

• 15:55Speaker 03

  And now, once again, up to this point, Herodotus has only been giving us information as told by Egyptians. But now he's going to expand that source and he's going to give us information from other sources, both Egyptian and non Egyptian, as well as his own observations, because it's Herodotus and we can't stop him. That's what Herodotus does. After the rule of Sethos, the Egyptians were left without a pharaoh. They then decided to divide up the country into twelve parts and to assign twelve different kings. Yet there was a prophecy that whoever of them poured eliabation from a bronze bowl inside the temple of Hephaestus would become the king of all Egypt. Their families intermarried and they built their own communal pyramid. There were

• 16:41Speaker 03

  a great many building projects that were erected during their time and during most of these times. And there was even a labyrinth, apparently. It was a large project in the end, full of intricate chambers and many levels and overall, just a pretty impressive sight. Now, after Herodotus tells us about this complex, he goes on to talk about Lake Moeris. You remember that one? The one from like the first episode of book two? Yeah. Herodotus is really interested in this lake and he goes on and on and on about it and I don't want to recount what he says. I can't. But if you want to read it, it's in chapter one forty-nine. He loved the lake. What I will talk about is his fascinating obsession with wondering where the dirt went

• 17:26Speaker 03

  that was dug out of the ground to create the reservoir of the lake. He was super obsessed with this, just couldn't figure it out. He asked those who lived around the lake, where did all the dirt go? And was actually satisfied with their answer because, well, he heard a similar thing about something that happened in Nineveh, the capital of Assyria. You see, King Sardana Palace, I should have practiced that before I got on here. Let's try again. King Sardana Palace of Neneve had a vast amount of wealth, which he kept all locked up in underground vaults. Thieves wanted to steal his treasure, as they are wont to do. And so they dug tunnels from their homes to these underground vaults.

• 18:09Speaker 03

  As they were digging, they took the piles of dirt and dumped it into the Tigris, the river that flows through Neneve. This is the same thing that happened in Egypt with the making of Lake Moheris. All that dirt was dumped into the Nile, which bore it downstream and away. Which I don't actually think makes sense. Uh, someone correct Herodotus, please, or correct me. Maybe it does make sense, but whatever, I will allow the story to exist unquestioned for now.

• 18:52Liv Albert?

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• 19:36Liv Albert?

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• 20:18Liv Albert?

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• 20:44Speaker 01

  Hey, we're Nick and Jack, hosts of the best one yet. Behind every episode, there's research, emails, spreadsheets and our shared Google Doc, the headline hammer. With Google Workspace with Gemini, Google's AI is built right into the premium versions of tools we already use, like Gmail, Docs and Sheets. No new tools or extra logins, just personalized AI for the way we work. That means less time on the work around the work and more time finding the stories worth talking about. Get AI tools for work. Upgrade to Google Workspace with Gemini at goo.gle/workspacewithgemini. That's goo.gle/workspacewithgemini.

• 21:19Speaker 02

  At Lowe's this Veterans Day and every day, military members, veterans and their spouses get automatic Milo's Rewards Silver Status Benefits. Plus 10% off eligible purchases with no annual limit. It's one way we honor and give back to those who have served and still do. Learn more and verify now at lows.com/military. 10% discount can't be combined with another offer. Exclusions, terms and conditions apply. Loyalty programs subject to terms and conditions. Details at lows.com/terms. Subject to change.

• 22:03Speaker 03

  Okay, back to the twelve kings, because of course, the story doesn't end there. Well, all these kings who are great friends of each other actually met up one day in the temple of Hephaestus. It was festival time, and sacrifices must be made, and they were accustomed to sacrifice together as a group. The priests brought them golden bowls to make the sacrifices with, but wait, wait, there wasn't enough bowls. So the last king, Sameticus, took off his bronze helmet and made the sacrifice with this. Which, I mean, sounds a lot like the bronze bowl from the oracle. He wasn't intending to complete the oracle, he just wanted to ensure that the sacrifice was done.

• 22:47Speaker 03

  The rest of the kings were pissed, but felt that it wasn't okay to kill him. Thanks guys, so instead, they stripped him of most of his powers and banished him to the marshes, and told him to never leave there, or talk to an Egyptian again. This was his second exile, the first time was with Sebacos, the Ethiopian king, where he was sent off into Syria, but the Egyptians who were living in the province of Sias went off to get him and bring him back. That's the story. Well, on this current occasion of exile, he felt greatly disrespected by the other kings. He didn't mean to fulfill the oracle, how dare they treat him like this? So he started plotting his vengeance. First, he sent Tabuto and asked for an oracle.

• 23:30Speaker 03

  "Retribution will come from the sea," says the oracle, "bronze men will come," the oracle says. Sameticus thought this was unlikely to happen, but you know how oracles go. They're gonna happen, and one day, a fleet of Ionian and Carian ships were blown off course and landed in Egypt. A random Egyptian saw this happen, and that these men were wearing bronze armor, and he went to tell Sameticus about it. Sameticus realized what was happening, so he called them to him and promised them rewards if they would fight for him. And they agreed, so he went off and gained Egypt from the rest of the kings. Very Jane Austen of him with that ending of real whoop whoop whoop whoop whoop. Just wrap it up real fast.

• 24:14Speaker 03

  Well, now Pausamaicus is the king of Egypt. He builds things and he gives the Ionians and the Carians some lands on the bank of the Nile. The Ionians were on one side and the Carians on the other. He also gave them some Egyptian children who could be taught Greek. Uh, I don't know, the kids do this, it's my little guys. They were originally settled near the mouth of the river. But under King Amasus, they were moved to Memphis and there they stayed. It's because of the Greeks living on Egyptian soil that the two areas have such a close connection. And that he is also able to get such reliable information from the time of Pausamaicus onwards.

• 24:53Speaker 03

  He then goes on to describe how jaw droppingly beautiful the temple Toledo and Artemis and Apollo is in Bhutto. It is a beautiful temple with monumental gates and amazing carvings. Herodotus loved this temple the most, but the one he loved the second most was on the island of Camus. Camus was an island on a deep lake and he was astounded to hear that it actually wasn't connected to the bottom of the lake in any way. And it floated to and fro at the whims of the water. There were great palm trees that grew out of it and fruit trees and a giant temple of Apollo. The Egyptians tell him that there is a reason for the island floating about. Once upon a time, the island was connected to the lake bed.

• 25:35Speaker 03

  Leda was alive during this time and she was actually entrusted with the care of Apollo by Isis. Typhon was sent after him, so she took the baby Apollo to the island of Camus to keep him safe. See, according to the Egyptians, Dionysus and Isis were the parents of Apollo. Apollo is Horus. Fantastic, we're getting some more information here. And Isis and Demeter are connected. So basically Dionysus and Demeter have a son who is Apollo. Artemis is Bubastus.

• 26:07Speaker 03

  But anyways, for some reason, this is why the islands float. I I would like Herodotus to give us more, but however, it does actually sound an awful lot. Like Artemis and and and Apollo and and Leto. Wow, I can't believe I just vaguely forgot their names. Anyways, after Semenakis has um his son Nekos ruled, he decided to dig a canal to the Red Sea. But he never finished it. Darius finished it later on. So hey, that's cool. Apparently, the digging of this canal was quite perilous. Many, many Egyptians died during its construction. The number Herodotus gives us is a hundred and twenty thousand. But also, we should never be trusting ancient sources on numbers. It's just, it's just not a good idea.

• 26:52Speaker 03

  Yet Neko stopped the construction halfway through as he received another oracle. Or maybe this is his first. I can't keep track. That said that his invention would only benefit a barbarian. And he didn't want that, so he just stopped. Instead, he turned to military campaigns. That seems healthy. He had ships built and went sailing around. He wandered around the Levant conquering as he went and after sixteen years of rule, he died. And left the seat of power to his son, Samos. Samos is now the king of Egypt. The first story we get is that some Eleans, those from the region of Ellis in northeastern, northeastern Peloponnese, um came to Egypt to boast about the Olympic Games.

• 27:37Speaker 03

  Which is where Olympia is. It's in Ellis. Anyways, it was such a wonderful institution and they bet that no one in Egypt could improve upon it cuz oh my god, it was so good. The king and his friends were like, okay, challenge accepted, and put their heads together to think about it. After a while, they came back to the Eleans and said, well, you say it's open to others, but how can you be unbiased at all? Obviously, if any Elean competes, competes, they will be favorited. So it would actually be, you know, not so great for any non-Eleans. The way to make it better was to ban Eleans from competing in the games and leave it as a game for others. That was their idea. And that's all we got.

• 28:22Speaker 03

  Now, on to some invasions, because of course there is. Six years into his rule, he invaded Ethiopia and then quickly died. But don't you worry, his son took over the reign. His son's name was Aprius. Apparently, he had a pretty good reign, very prosperous, much delightful. Only Somaticus had a better reign, but you know, we're not talking about him anymore. We're talking about Aprius. Aprius did some conquering of his own, going after Sidon and Tyre. Yet he was fated to die horribly, which Herodotus will get to in a bit. We'll, we'll find out. Long story short, he launched a campaign, it went badly, the Egyptians revolted and went after him.

• 29:05Speaker 03

  Aprius learned of this and sent a man named Amasis. Does that name sound familiar? Should from the beginning. He sent Amasis to go talk to them. Amasis did this, but then the rebels were like, but what if you're a king? And he was like, you know what? I see your point. So he joined them and off they trotted to Aprius. Aprius, hearing of this, sent one of his advisors to go get him back. The man, Patro Bemis, went off and when he got there, well, I just. I imagine it went something like that scene in Monty Python's Holy Grail, when Arthur and the knights come to the French castle. It was literally just Amasis mocking Patro Bemis and Aprius.

• 29:49Speaker 03

  It's kind of funny, actually. Anyways.

• 29:54Speaker 03

  So he was mocking Patro Bemis. He was not letting him get a single word in, and then he finally just told him to fuck off. So he did. Patro Bemis went back to the castle and when Aprius saw him without Amasis, he wouldn't even let the man speak. He just immediately demanded that his ears and nose be cut off. Well, the rest of the Egyptians that were on Aprius's side didn't like that this happened. They were shocked that he could be disrespectful to a man so respected. And so they promptly decided to get rid of the.

• 30:29Speaker 03

  King.

• 30:32Speaker 03

  Aprius then got some bodyguards, armed Ionian and Carian men, and went out again to the rest of the Egyptians. They met in the symphy, Mo Memphis, for battle. Herodotus goes on a quick aside, we are going to talk about the different classes of men in Egypt. There are seven. I know, we aren't going to look at them all, or really any of them, but I will list them. There are the priests, the warriors, then the cowherds, swineherds, tradesmen, interpreters, and the steersmen. The warrior class is further divided in two. He goes on to talk a lot more about the warrior class, and it is interesting, but I fear that I am actually running out of time a bit. So, you know what, chapters one sixty-four to sixty-eight, if you wanna read it.

• 31:15Speaker 03

  He also talks about the regions where each of the warrior classes come from, and then talks about some of the benefits of the job, mainly that they receive land. But back to the battle at hand, let's find out what happens. Well, it didn't go well for Aprius. While he had good troops, they were simply outnumbered and quickly overwhelmed. He was captured and carried off to Sais, to the palace which now Ammasus inhabited. Ammasus did treat him well, but the Egyptian people were actually kind of unhappy that he was doing so. They didn't want that to happen. They didn't like Aprius. So, after a certain amount of pressure from the people, Ammasus finally decided to give up Aprius to the people, who was then promptly torn apart by them. Delightful.

• 32:01Speaker 03

  Aprius was put to rest in his ancestral tomb, close to the sanctuary of Athena. And at this point, Herodotus makes a small mention that I am very, very interested in what it means. But he doesn't give us a lot, because why would he expand now? Basically, also buried in Sais is the one who he will not mention the name of. Because it's the wrong context too, now it would be sack village to mention it. The tomb is within Athena's sanctuary and takes up the entire length of a wall. And there were huge stone obelisks nearby, and a lake with stones placed all around the edge. I'm curious about this figure, there's so much mystery wrapped in it all, and I just want to know more, but for once, Herodotus isn't telling us anything.

• 32:45Speaker 03

  Which is also super interesting in and of itself. Why does he feel like you can't talk about this god or that it would be incredibly disrespectful to do so? There's a reason in this, and I'm sure there are many someones out there who have done a lot of research on this, so maybe when I have the time, I can find it, but for now, we shall continue with the Herodotian narrative. Well, now Amasis was on the throne, and interestingly, it is said he was initially hated by the Egyptians. Why, you may ask, after they just helped him overthrow the last king? Well, it's because he comes from humble backgrounds. So classism, basically, but whatever. Amasis, however, was embaltered by all of this and eventually won them over.

• 33:28Speaker 03

  Basically, he had a golden foot bath, which many had washed their dirty, dirty feet in, or vomited in, or even pissed in, because why not? And one day, he had this golden tub made into the statue of a god. And then he placed it in the city, and it was much beloved. And then one day, he revealed its origins. It's like, it's like me, y'all, he says. Once it was lowly, now it's not. They were all like, fair enough, and that was that. He had an interesting routine for the days. He would spend the first half of his day working as hard as he could, just toiling away at all of his administrative duties as king. And then during the second half, he would just party-vark anthem it up. Whoa, that's a reference anyways.

• 34:14Speaker 03

  This bothered some people. And they confronted him about it, and he simply responded, guys, guys, if you work all the time, it's not gonna be good for you. Like, think of a bow. If you keep it strong all the time, eventually it will snap. And I ain't gonna snap, buds. And the rest of them were like, fair enough. But the thing is that Amasis was known for being a bit of a party man- animal. He loved to party his whole life, both before and after his kingship. Is there an after? There's not an after, both before and during.

• 34:48Speaker 03

  So I say, let's let the man party. He's gonna do what he's gonna do. After this, Herodotus talks about Amasus's attitudes toward the oracles. See, if any oracle was good, he was pretty chill with it. That god can stay. He likes that guy. But if the oracle was bad, he would immediately cut the funding and say that god ain't shit. And you know, he didn't seem a bit bothered about that. I actually kinda love this guy. In like a, in like a, he's like a hot mess. And I love watching a hot mess. Not in a, I wanna know him or be around him kinda way. It's the same reason I like Alcibiades. He's a hot mess, but it's beautiful.

• 35:29Speaker 03

  After all this, Herodotus goes on to discuss all the building projects that happened during Amasus's reign. Because this is Herodotus's favorite pastime, architecture. He had a wonderful gate made for the sanctuary of Athena in Sias. Some sphinxes given to the temple made of stone from all over Egypt. Some restoration of the temple, making it prettier, making it bigger, you know, the usual things. There was a chamber made that was so huge that it was simply too difficult for the workmen to move. They tried with logs, but Amasus saw them struggling and said, hey, you know, that's way too much. We could stop. That's one story. Another is that this chamber fell on a worker, squashed him like an ant, crisp plat.

• 36:13Speaker 03

  And Amasus was like, ooh, okay, that's probably not chill. Let's stop. It was also during the reign of Amasus that the Greeks received Naukratis, a city on the Nile that was really more like a trading outpost. He also allowed them to set up their own sanctuaries, the largest of which was the Hellenium, which many cities put money and work into. It was a joint effort, mostly on the ones in Asia Minor when I was looking at the list. Anyways. Naukratis was originally the only port of trade in Egypt. This was the only place that foreigners could enter Egypt to buy and do their trading. If one happened to wash ashore somewhere else, he was obliged to say it wasn't voluntary.

• 36:53Speaker 03

  The boat had a mind of its own and, and then leave immediately. And if he couldn't, he would have to find a way to get his boat to Naukratis. When he could there, more it, and ta-da, now he can do his business. We're going to end here, so you'll have to forgive the all overness of the place. The Temple of Telphiy burned down and the Delphinians went around asking for donations so that they could rebuild it. The largest donations came from Egypt. Amasus even married a Kyrenian woman because he wanted a Greek wife. Sure, her name was Ladike, according to some sources, but there is discussion about who her actual father was.

• 37:35Speaker 03

  Regardless, she was high class. He was obsessed with her. He, but you know, he did have some difficulty performing in the bedroom. Every time he came to consummate the marriage, he simply could not perform. He promised her, this has never happened with any of my other wives, which is what they always say, but I digress. This goes on for a while and eventually he just gets frustrated. Curse you, he screams, like a child, you must have done something to me. Now you must die to the worst possible death. Ladike apparently tried to talk him out of this. I think she was rolling her eyes, but you can think what you want.

• 38:15Speaker 03

  She sent up a prayer to Aphrodite, please let this man just get the job done. If you allow this, I'll send a statue of you to be set up in Kyreni. And as soon as she did this, and I quote, Amasus was having his way with her to triumphant effect. Triumphant effect? What a way to say that. That's beautiful. From then on, he only wanted to be with Ladike and he sent a statue of Aphrodite to be set up in Kyreni. The woman keeps her word. Herodotus then ends the book with a great sentence. I'm gonna quote it because it's just, it's such a good ending. It's so Herodotus, it's amazing.

• 38:57Speaker 03

  He was also the first man to conquer Cyprus and force it to pay tribute. That, like, that's literally it, like. He went around conquering and subjugating other Mediterranean peoples. How fun.

• 39:24Speaker 03

  Well, folks, that's all of Book Two of The Herodotus's The History of the Herodotus's. I promise I can speak. What a wild ride. It always is with Herodotus, isn't it? He's such a wacky guy, full of the wackiest stories, but they are also so much fun to read and talk about. I'm really trying, well, maybe not so much with this book. I'll start trying harder in Book Three. To ask the whys behind Herodotus's methods. Why is he inserting each story at each specific point? What is the reason for his tangents? I know I have made fun of him for that, but to be fair, this isn't something you simply write down on a whim. There's a method to his madness, and the method is delightful, and I am determined to find it.

• 40:09Speaker 03

  I mean, the guy's narrative is very interesting. We have to take some things with a grain of salt, but not all of it, and that says something at least. There are interesting things to look at in Book Two. Well, I need to go catch a flight, so I'll see you all when I see you all, and I hope you're all excited for some new Liv episodes. And also, yes, I'm so very upset about the hippos. It's not right. Be well, my dudes. Let's Talk About Myths Baby is written and produced by the one and only Liv Albert. Back from her vacation soon? I can't remember. Michaela Pangarish is the Hermes to all your Olympians.

• 40:49Speaker 03

  The producer, sleep deprived, so very, very sleep deprived. Select music by Luke Chaos. Thank you, Mr. Chaos. The podcast is part of the Memory Collective Podcast Network, a collection of creators that all strive to bring you accurate and reliable information on the ancient world. These include the wonderful friends at Movies We Dig, The Partial Historian, Sweetbitter, and so much more. Get ad-free episodes and more by subscription to the Oracle Edition on Patreon at patreon.com/MythsBaby or via the link in the episode's description. Are you a scholar, or an academic, or an expert in something from antiquity? All the way from Greece to Rome to Egypt to anywhere in the Near East, really?

• 41:32Speaker 03

  We would love to have you on the show as a conversation guest. Go to mythsbaby.com/contact and fill out our podcast guest form. We want to hear from you, so reach out. Talk to you all next week. Bye-bye.

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