Bobby's Bowling Date

NEW MERCH ALERT: Get 20% OFF our new merch on our YouTube Store. Get MORE Bad Friends at our Patreon!! https://www.patreon.com/badfriends Thank you to our Sponsors: Huel, Displate, Adam & Eve, BLUECHEW, Draft Kings & Rocket Money • Huel: Try Huel with 15% OFF today using code BADFRIENDS at https://my.huel.com/BADFRIENDS. Fuel your best performance with Huel today! • Acorns: Start investing in your future today at https://www.acorns.com/badfriends • ZocDoc: Find and book top rated doctors at https://www.zocdoc.com/badfriends • Morgan & Morgan: If you’re ever injured, you can check out Morgan & Morgan. Their fee is free unless they win. For more information go to https://ForThePeople.com/badfriends or dial Pound LAW YouTube Subscribe: http://bit.ly/BadFriendsYouTube Merch: http://badfriendsmerch.com 0:00 Election Night 5:00 Don't Fart in My Face 11:00 Out of Pocket Activities 16:30 Pranked at Bert Kreischer's Party 23:00 Bobby Writes a Movie 34:00 Rudy Gets Ghosted 41:00 A Message to the Party Girls 47:30 Bobby's New Man Crush 52:30 Tom Cruise Cake is Overrated 56:30 Dax Flame at the Comedy Store 1:03:00 Dax Needs a Wingman 1:15:30 Alley Oop, Beep Beep! More Bobby Lee TigerBelly: https://www.youtube.com/tigerbelly Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bobbyleelive Twitter: https://twitter.com/bobbyleelive Tickets: https://bobbylee.live More Andrew Santino Whiskey Ginger: https://www.youtube.com/andrewsantinowhiskeyginger Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cheetosantino Twitter: https://Twitter.com/cheetosantino Tickets: http://www.andrewsantino.com More Juicy Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jetskijohnson/?hl=en More Fancy SOS VHS: https://www.youtube.com/@SOSVHS Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/fancyb.1 More Bad Friends iTunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bad-friends/id1496265971 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/badfriendspod/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/badfriends_pod Official Website: http://badfriendspod.com/ Opening Credits and Branding: https://www.instagram.com/joseph_faria & https://www.instagram.com/jenna_sunday Credit Sequence Music: http://bit.ly/RocomMusic // https://www.instagram.com/rocom Character Design: https://www.instagram.com/jeffreymyles Bad Friends Mosaic Sign: https://www.instagram.com/tedmunzmosaicart Produced by: 7EQUIS https://www.7equis.com/ Podcast Producer: Andrés Rosende This episode contains paid promotion. #bobbylee #andrewsantino #badfriends #sponsored #ads Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Speaker names marked ? are inferred from speaking time and the show’s known hosts — they are not voice-verified.

• 0:00Speaker 00

  You two are bad friends.

• 0:01Bobby Lee?

  Who are these two idiots?

• 0:03Speaker 00

  A white dude and an Asian dude. You two are disgusting.

• 0:08Bobby Lee?

  Oh, you two are something.

• 0:10Speaker 00

  We're bad friends.

• 0:12Bobby Lee?

  Anyway, we're filming this podcast election night.

• 0:16Andrew Santino?

  We filmed this on election night on purpose.

• 0:18Bobby Lee?

  When you're listening to this, this is election night.

• 0:20Andrew Santino?

  I also think we did this on the last election.

• 0:24Bobby Lee?

  We were around then? Yeah, 2020. Yeah, 2020, 2020. Like, this guy.

• 0:29Andrew Santino?

  I'm almost positive.

• 0:30Bobby Lee?

  No one talked except for us today.

• 0:32Andrew Santino?

  Did we do an episode, did we do an episode on, I think we did? Because I remember him talking like this. This sounds familiar.

• 0:40Bobby Lee?

  No, because I, no, I'll tell you why we weren't.

• 0:42Speaker 03

  Tito Bobby was in Joshua Tree.

• 0:44Bobby Lee?

  I was in Joshua, thank you so much. I was in Joshua Tree. Yeah, just like, you know, in a desert, like a rabbit, desert rabbit, rabbit, rabbit, desert rabbit, rabbit.

• 0:55Bobby Lee?

  I can't, I can't pod today. I can't even say desert rabbit, dude. I can't even say desert rabbit right now, dude.

• 1:01Andrew Santino?

  Say it again.

• 1:01Bobby Lee?

  Give me the line again? I was in the, desert rabbit.

• 1:04Andrew Santino?

  Oh, you were in a desert rabbit?

• 1:09Bobby Lee?

  I mean, it was, I remember, do you remember, you were there?

• 1:11Andrew Santino?

  Let's be real, though.

• 1:12Bobby Lee?

  I remember Julio was on the couch with his arm on the couch watching me. Yeah, I remember.

• 1:19Andrew Santino?

  Did you even vote today?

• 1:22Bobby Lee?

  No, I give money.

• 1:24Andrew Santino?

  So you didn't even vote?

• 1:25Bobby Lee?

  You didn't either.

• 1:26Andrew Santino?

  Yes, I did.

• 1:27Bobby Lee?

  There's no way. Where's your sticker?

• 1:28Andrew Santino?

  Where's my sticker? I don't wear the sticker. I'm not a cock.

• 1:31Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, well, I did too, then.

• 1:33Andrew Santino?

  No, I know you didn't.

• 1:33Bobby Lee?

  Yes, I did.

• 1:34Andrew Santino?

  When? Where?

• 1:35Bobby Lee?

  At Beechwood Canyon.

• 1:36Andrew Santino?

  No, you didn't. No, you didn't. When? What time?

• 1:39Bobby Lee?

  2:00 PM.

• 1:40Andrew Santino?

  2:00 PM?

• 1:41Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:41Andrew Santino?

  Give me your phone.

• 1:42Bobby Lee?

  You give me your phone.

• 1:44Andrew Santino?

  Okay, what, what?

• 1:45Bobby Lee?

  What kind of game are we playing?

• 1:46Andrew Santino?

  Because I know at 2:00 PM, I can see who you were communicating with at 2:00 PM, and you would be like, I'm in line, here I am.

• 1:52Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, that's my.

• 1:53Andrew Santino?

  I have proof. I live with someone that goes, yep, I went to the fucking Almet.

• 1:56Bobby Lee?

  And I have proof. I have a lot of people that do it, do anything.

• 1:58Andrew Santino?

  No, you don't.

• 1:58Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I have my housekeeper.

• 1:59Andrew Santino?

  Why would you lie?

• 2:00Bobby Lee?

  He goes, where are you going?

• 2:01Andrew Santino?

  Did you vote?

• 2:01Bobby Lee?

  Yes, I did.

• 2:02Andrew Santino?

  You're a liar.

• 2:03Bobby Lee?

  My housekeeper goes, where are you going?

• 2:05Andrew Santino?

  How can the fans believe you if you say you'd voted when we know you didn't?

• 2:09Bobby Lee?

  How can you do this right now?

• 2:11Andrew Santino?

  Because you're Mr. On Your High Horse.

• 2:12Bobby Lee?

  You're a high horse.

• 2:13Andrew Santino?

  Here you are complaining about something you didn't even contribute to.

• 2:16Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. He's never voted.

• 2:18Andrew Santino?

  Well, that's my.

• 2:18Bobby Lee?

  It doesn't matter in California!

• 2:20Andrew Santino?

  Yes, it does! No!

• 2:22Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I need, wait, hold on. I need a churro.

• 2:28Andrew Santino?

  It's insane.

• 2:29Bobby Lee?

  You know what, I'm gonna get a cookie.

• 2:30Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, get churro and a cookie.

• 2:32Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I'm gonna get a half a cookie.

• 2:34Andrew Santino?

  That'll solve all your problems. This is what the liberals do, they eat away their feelings. They're sad about what happened, they eat their... Munch, munch, munch, cookie monster. No, but let me be serious for a second, okay? Neither of us voted. We know that.

• 2:50Bobby Lee?

  You didn't either.

• 2:51Andrew Santino?

  Of course not, of course not. But we should for at least the local elections. I'm mad about that. But I couldn't because, guess what? Went to the registrar, I'm not registered. How? I voted last time, called, still, I need to go in and turn in more proof documents that it, it's me. So either somebody stole my identity, but I don't have my original birth certificate. Do you?

• 3:12Bobby Lee?

  Mine's framed.

• 3:13Andrew Santino?

  My parents died in a fire when I was a kid. They're all gone, everything's gone.

• 3:17Speaker 03

  You can do that online, request another.

• 3:20Andrew Santino?

  A birth certificate?

• 3:21Bobby Lee?

  Exactly, thank you so much.

• 3:21Andrew Santino?

  How long does it take to get? This is coming from someone that definitely didn't get a certificate of birth.

• 3:29Bobby Lee?

  Let's not talk about birth certificates right now, dude.

• 3:31Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, okay. Anyway, I tried.

• 3:33Bobby Lee?

  Don't Google how you get one, then we have to go through the process. I don't want to go through the process of it.

• 3:39Andrew Santino?

  It does take, it is a pain in the ass. It's a whole thing, proving you were born.

• 3:44Speaker 04

  I mean, it took me three minutes to register, to vote.

• 3:47Andrew Santino?

  But, yeah, because you're a brand new citizen and they cannot wait to get your information. Guess what, dude? Jury duties coming your way, you're gonna have so much solicitation coming your way, I cannot wait. You're fresh blood, kiddo. You're new to the fold, and welcome, by the way. Can't wait to take your taxes.

• 4:02Bobby Lee?

  And another thing...

• 4:04Andrew Santino?

  Scumbag.

• 4:05Bobby Lee?

  You scumbag.

• 4:06Andrew Santino?

  Get him, Bob.

• 4:07Bobby Lee?

  You're students, right? Who pay for their dinner?

• 4:10Andrew Santino?

  Bobby did.

• 4:11Bobby Lee?

  Was that not a nice gesture?

• 4:12Andrew Santino?

  That's right.

• 4:12Bobby Lee?

  And you treat me like you did earlier.

• 4:14Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 4:14Bobby Lee?

  About saying, oh, here's, you know, he doesn't, you know, Mr., whatever you already said, whatever, what did he say?

• 4:19Andrew Santino?

  I don't remember, but I agree.

• 4:20Bobby Lee?

  I can't even, I'm so emotional, I can't even speak.

• 4:22Andrew Santino?

  Get it out.

• 4:22Bobby Lee?

  All right? So enough of that, kind of behavior, all right?

• 4:28Andrew Santino?

  And by the way, Bobby gave them money and he goes so far, not only did he give them money, he cooked them dinner tonight, came right from cooking dinner.

• 4:35Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 4:37Andrew Santino?

  Isn't that polite?

• 4:38Bobby Lee?

  That's so polite.

• 4:39Andrew Santino?

  I don't know, I don't get that chef shirt. I love your fashion. You always have good fashion. The chef shirt, I don't get.

• 4:45Bobby Lee?

  It's the Roach one. The McConaughey.

• 4:46Andrew Santino?

  That is the Roach shirt.

• 4:47Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. McConaughey, do you like this one? I think it's sick. I think it's sick too. Yeah. And McConaughey would no more.

• 4:52Andrew Santino?

  Yeah dude.

• 4:53Bobby Lee?

  McConaughey would no more.

• 4:53Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, come over here.

• 4:54Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 4:55Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, look at what this fucking loser's wearing.

• 4:57Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 4:57Andrew Santino?

  Look.

• 4:57Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. He's wearing an Adolf Hitler shirt.

• 5:01Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 5:02Bobby Lee?

  You know what I mean? A tanned. Yeah, you voted? Alright, great.

• 5:06Andrew Santino?

  Get out of here.

• 5:07Bobby Lee?

  Get out of here, kid.

• 5:07Andrew Santino?

  Fast as you can.

• 5:08Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 5:09Andrew Santino?

  His jeans have a shit stain on the back.

• 5:11Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 5:12Andrew Santino?

  Hate him.

• 5:13Bobby Lee?

  I'll tell you another thing. If you ever pull your pants down in front of me and Jules and you do a ramen fart, I swear to God dude, you have another thing coming.

• 5:21Andrew Santino?

  What will you do? What will you do? You know what this is like? That clip with Mike Tyson when he's like, "Yeah, I'mma vote for Trump."

• 5:28Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 5:28Andrew Santino?

  What are you gonna do about it? And everyone's like, "Well..."

• 5:31Bobby Lee?

  Nothing.

• 5:32Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, that's right.

• 5:33Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 5:33Andrew Santino?

  So shut the fuck, so shut the fuck up. How about that?

• 5:35Bobby Lee?

  You know what? It's so funny. What am I gonna do about it?

• 5:38Andrew Santino?

  What are you gonna do about it?

• 5:38Bobby Lee?

  I'm gonna do something that's not nonviolent.

• 5:41Andrew Santino?

  Okay.

• 5:41Bobby Lee?

  Okay, so is that what you're pertaining to?

• 5:43Andrew Santino?

  No, anything. What are you gonna do about it? I'm gonna fart on, I'm gonna, when I gotta fart on one, I'm farting right at you every time.

• 5:49Bobby Lee?

  I twist minds.

• 5:51Andrew Santino?

  Mm-hmm.

• 5:52Bobby Lee?

  Okay, and I'll corkscrew your fucking mind into a different dimension.

• 5:55Andrew Santino?

  You are mind boggling.

• 5:56Bobby Lee?

  Alright.

• 5:57Andrew Santino?

  There's a lot about you.

• 5:58Bobby Lee?

  I have people that I call, dude.

• 6:00Andrew Santino?

  Whom?

• 6:01Bobby Lee?

  Whom?

• 6:02Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, whom?

• 6:02Bobby Lee?

  To whom?

• 6:03Andrew Santino?

  Whom do you call?

• 6:03Bobby Lee?

  To whom?

• 6:05Andrew Santino?

  Woo! Don't scare me, bitch.

• 6:09Bobby Lee?

  Okay, you want a war?

• 6:11Bobby Lee?

  You want a war with me?

• 6:12Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 6:12Bobby Lee?

  Alright, we'll have a war.

• 6:13Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 6:13Bobby Lee?

  I don't want it. You started it.

• 6:15Andrew Santino?

  I didn't start shit.

• 6:16Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 6:17Andrew Santino?

  You came at me.

• 6:17Bobby Lee?

  Don't fart in my face!

• 6:19Andrew Santino?

  Nobody farted in your face. I farted at her.

• 6:21Speaker 03

  You farted at both of us.

• 6:23Bobby Lee?

  Thank you so much.

• 6:24Andrew Santino?

  You know what? You were in the blast radius.

• 6:26Bobby Lee?

  I know, yeah.

• 6:26Andrew Santino?

  You caught some shrapnel. You were in the blast radius.

• 6:28Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 6:29Andrew Santino?

  It was aimed at you. Look, I tried to hit the Philippines.

• 6:32Bobby Lee?

  It's like when Chernobyl went off, right? It affected Germany.

• 6:35Andrew Santino?

  It did!

• 6:36Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. Is that what you're saying?

• 6:37Andrew Santino?

  Yes!

• 6:37Bobby Lee?

  I'm German.

• 6:38Andrew Santino?

  Yes, you're German.

• 6:38Bobby Lee?

  Okay, fuck dude.

• 6:39Andrew Santino?

  Das ist nicht gut.

• 6:40Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 6:42Andrew Santino?

  By the way, ramen? I'm never gonna go to that place ever again.

• 6:45Bobby Lee?

  Which one is it?

• 6:46Andrew Santino?

  Well, I don't wanna shit on it.

• 6:47Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, whisper, whisper.

• 6:47Andrew Santino?

  Well, we can blank it out.

• 6:48Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, blank it out. Oh, it's terrible. Dude, there's one by our houses.

• 6:52Andrew Santino?

  No, no, this was because I was on the road. I know, I know. I'm on the ru- I was on the run and I was like, it's, I had a postmate to bring in here to eat it. Guess how much my ramen was tonight from them? I'm not kidding. I added some shit in there.

• 7:04Bobby Lee?

  Okay, so, uh...

• 7:05Andrew Santino?

  I got, I got a regular, old school, and I added a few new vegetables and, and I wanted extra meat. Thirty-two dollars.

• 7:11Bobby Lee?

  Thirty-two dollars, right?

• 7:12Andrew Santino?

  You know what I mean. That's a rip-off.

• 7:14Bobby Lee?

  Boo hoo, dude.

• 7:15Andrew Santino?

  That's a rip-off.

• 7:16Bobby Lee?

  Do you know what?

• 7:17Andrew Santino?

  That's a rip-off, but, but by any standard, that's a rip-off. That's a rip-off.

• 7:21Bobby Lee?

  This guy buys a silk, right? Cover for each one of his fucking golf clubs.

• 7:27Andrew Santino?

  That's not true. That's absolutely not true.

• 7:28Bobby Lee?

  Eighty-nine ninety-five each silk, right? He's got fifteen golf clubs, right? Because they have to be like, you know what I mean, spotless. And it's gotta have that fucking...

• 7:35Andrew Santino?

  Go get the golf clubs right now and see how they're all...

• 7:37Bobby Lee?

  Those are your secondary ones.

• 7:38Andrew Santino?

  They're actually...

• 7:39Bobby Lee?

  Those are, those are your secondary ones that you keep at the office. You have ones at home, whatever.

• 7:43Andrew Santino?

  I have no clubs at home.

• 7:44Bobby Lee?

  Louis Vuitton. Put it back.

• 7:46Andrew Santino?

  Louis Vuitton.

• 7:46Bobby Lee?

  Look at those silk things.

• 7:47Andrew Santino?

  That and Arty. Those, those covers are for the drivers, uninformed. Didn't you get beat with those things? You don't even know what they are?

• 7:53Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. My dad took the covers off.

• 7:55Andrew Santino?

  He did?

• 7:55Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, when he beat me with them. Okay. So, um...

• 7:58Andrew Santino?

  The silk covers?

• 8:00Bobby Lee?

  Dude.

• 8:00Andrew Santino?

  Thanks for not playing good improv and getting on board me with the ramen.

• 8:03Bobby Lee?

  Oh, so, thirty-three dollars for ramen?

• 8:09Bobby Lee?

  Oh, no! You know, man, they should go back to wherever they came from. That's way too much money.

• 8:15Andrew Santino?

  Where should they go back to?

• 8:17Bobby Lee?

  I thought you wanted improv. Now you're doing ne- you're now, you're negging it.

• 8:20Andrew Santino?

  Well, what do you, no, I'm not gonna, don't...

• 8:22Bobby Lee?

  You're, you're negative.

• 8:22Andrew Santino?

  Go back to where they came from?

• 8:24Bobby Lee?

  I don't know what bit you want me to do, dude.

• 8:26Andrew Santino?

  A funny one.

• 8:27Bobby Lee?

  Say it again, then. Let's start again. Say it again. I, I, I'll, I'll read the tempo.

• 8:31Andrew Santino?

  You know, I had really good ramen today?

• 8:32Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, whoa, where?

• 8:33Andrew Santino?

  But it was expensive.

• 8:34Bobby Lee?

  Where? Let me guess.

• 8:37Andrew Santino?

  Where?

• 8:38Bobby Lee?

  Let me guess.

• 8:38Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 8:39Bobby Lee?

  Because I've had a problem with these people too, dude.

• 8:41Andrew Santino?

  Where?

• 8:42Bobby Lee?

  Does it say with the, start with a J?

• 8:44Andrew Santino?

  It does.

• 8:45Bobby Lee?

  End it with an A?

• 8:46Andrew Santino?

  It does.

• 8:46Bobby Lee?

  Janga.

• 8:47Andrew Santino?

  Mm-hmm.

• 8:48Bobby Lee?

  Janga ramen?

• 8:48Andrew Santino?

  Janga, janga. Did, did you get nervous when we were yelling at each other?

• 8:51Speaker 03

  Yeah, and you were getting red, so I thought it was...

• 8:54Andrew Santino?

  I'm hot. I should take off this sweater. It's too hot in here.

• 8:56Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 8:57Speaker 03

  You're scary when you're angry.

• 8:58Bobby Lee?

  I know.

• 8:59Andrew Santino?

  Thank you!

• 9:00Bobby Lee?

  What about me?

• 9:01Speaker 03

  Uh, you're okay.

• 9:02Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 9:02Bobby Lee?

  See, that's what I'm saying.

• 9:03Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you're not scary.

• 9:04Bobby Lee?

  I get angry with peace.

• 9:06Andrew Santino?

  Hmm.

• 9:07Bobby Lee?

  You know what I mean?

• 9:07Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 9:08Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. Firm but soft.

• 9:10Andrew Santino?

  Always soft.

• 9:11Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, it's a com- it's a combo. See, I do combo expressions. What people don't realize about me.

• 9:16Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you're like a combo.

• 9:17Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 9:17Andrew Santino?

  Filled with shit.

• 9:18Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 9:20Bobby Lee?

  Rage, but empathy. A little hint of empathy underneath, right? Joy, but with a little bit of resentment.

• 9:27Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 9:28Bobby Lee?

  It's a combination that I put out there because I'm human. And I'm a complex human being, dynamic, in many ways. Okay? So I am sorry that you spent so much on that food.

• 9:38Andrew Santino?

  Thanks.

• 9:39Bobby Lee?

  And, um...

• 9:41Andrew Santino?

  I'm just not gonna tell you anything anymore.

• 9:43Bobby Lee?

  That's be- you're being like a little baby right there.

• 9:45Andrew Santino?

  You lead the show.

• 9:47Bobby Lee?

  Oh, come on, dude. Can I just say something?

• 9:48Andrew Santino?

  No, lead the show tonight.

• 9:49Bobby Lee?

  I'll tell you something.

• 9:50Andrew Santino?

  I'm gonna let you lead the show. You ready?

• 9:52Bobby Lee?

  So this fucking guy, Amir Kay, is in the green room at the comedy- I'll tell you where I'm at, right?

• 9:57Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, where's this coming from? I thought we'd put cookies in you, you'd be happy.

• 10:00Bobby Lee?

  Hey, give me the rest of the cookie.

• 10:01Andrew Santino?

  Please.

• 10:02Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 10:02Andrew Santino?

  Please give him more cookies. Huh?

• 10:05Speaker 04

  What happened with the salmon pick?

• 10:06Bobby Lee?

  I'm on the salmon pick.

• 10:09Andrew Santino?

  Oh, dude.

• 10:10Bobby Lee?

  Dude.

• 10:10Andrew Santino?

  Don't, I'm trying to have a show tonight.

• 10:12Bobby Lee?

  I know, dude. What are you doing, dude? I'm gonna get you. Or I'm gonna...

• 10:19Bobby Lee?

  You wanna get...

• 10:21Andrew Santino?

  Give him the cookie.

• 10:21Bobby Lee?

  Thank you, thank you. What's this? No, stop, stop, stop.

• 10:23Andrew Santino?

  Give me the other one.

• 10:24Bobby Lee?

  No, what's this?

• 10:25Andrew Santino?

  You want half of this, Rudy?

• 10:27Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. Okay.

• 10:28Andrew Santino?

  Very good.

• 10:28Bobby Lee?

  I don't want this.

• 10:31Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. Come here, dude.

• 10:33Andrew Santino?

  Lick it off his finger.

• 10:34Bobby Lee?

  Eat, eat.

• 10:35Andrew Santino?

  Lick it off.

• 10:36Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, there we go.

• 10:36Andrew Santino?

  Good boy.

• 10:37Bobby Lee?

  Good boy.

• 10:38Andrew Santino?

  Good boy.

• 10:38Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 10:42Bobby Lee?

  Good cookie.

• 10:42Andrew Santino?

  These are so good.

• 10:43Bobby Lee?

  Let's start a new one.

• 10:44Andrew Santino?

  Oh, start a new one.

• 10:45Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 10:47Bobby Lee?

  A week ago. I'm in the green room at the Comedy Store. I'm just sitting there with... I wanna say his name. Should I say it?

• 10:57Andrew Santino?

  Why can't you say the name?

• 10:58Bobby Lee?

  He's my dear friend.

• 10:59Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, we're friends with him. But we can't say the name because you wanna protect him because of what the best-

• 11:03Bobby Lee?

  Well, you know, I just, you know, he... He started spouting off some politics. You know what I mean? You know, and when it comes to fishing... I'll listen to him.

• 11:16Bobby Lee?

  What's so funny? He loves to fish.

• 11:17Andrew Santino?

  He's actually an incredible fisher. I've eaten fish that he's caught.

• 11:19Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's a great fisherman, okay?

• 11:21Andrew Santino?

  What's so funny, McCon?

• 11:22Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, dude.

• 11:24Andrew Santino?

  What's so funny?

• 11:25Speaker 04

  I just wasn't expecting fishing to get brought up in this political conversation.

• 11:35Bobby Lee?

  I mean, for sure, he can't come to Australia.

• 11:37Andrew Santino?

  You're not coming.

• 11:37Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, for sure.

• 11:39Andrew Santino?

  Unpack your shit when you get home.

• 11:40Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, for sure.

• 11:41Andrew Santino?

  Unpack it, stay.

• 11:42Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, because that stuff, that right there, dude?

• 11:46Bobby Lee?

  Not good, dude.

• 11:46Andrew Santino?

  Let me tell you, I don't want to cut you off, I want this story to finish, but just so I can be a little bit more-

• 11:50Bobby Lee?

  I'm with you here.

• 11:52Andrew Santino?

  When I walked in today, and these two guys saw, well, no, you saw it, actually, Andre saw it. Did he have attitude to me?

• 11:58Speaker 05

  Oof.

• 12:00Andrew Santino?

  Bobby, if you were fucking here, and then I yelled at him, and I said, "If Bob were here for this, and you-" The response, the way he responds to me these days, it's-

• 12:09Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 12:10Andrew Santino?

  It's, it's, I, I'm actually like, I'm genuinely shocked.

• 12:13Bobby Lee?

  Okay, so this, Bad Friends, just to give you some education, is a TV show, we do TV show numbers.

• 12:20Andrew Santino?

  That's right.

• 12:20Bobby Lee?

  Okay?

• 12:21Andrew Santino?

  Well-

• 12:21Bobby Lee?

  So, you know, when a PA, let's say a showrunner-

• 12:26Andrew Santino?

  What, what, a showrunner?

• 12:27Bobby Lee?

  Let's say there's a showrunner-

• 12:28Andrew Santino?

  Got it.

• 12:29Bobby Lee?

  And a PA, or, or, you know, somebody on set that does like, props, right?

• 12:34Andrew Santino?

  Mm-hmm.

• 12:34Bobby Lee?

  Talks back-

• 12:35Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 12:36Bobby Lee?

  In a negative way to the showrunner-

• 12:37Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 12:38Bobby Lee?

  The showrunner doesn't even know that dude's name.

• 12:40Andrew Santino?

  He gets fired on the spot.

• 12:41Bobby Lee?

  He's like, "Who's that?"

• 12:43Andrew Santino?

  Who's that guy?

• 12:43Bobby Lee?

  What we did, was we went, "Oh, let's memorize the prop guy's name."

• 12:47Andrew Santino?

  Right, we let him in.

• 12:48Bobby Lee?

  And like, "Let's exchange number with the fucking lighting guy." Right? And all of a sudden, the lighting guy's like, "Oh, I'm equal to the showrunner."

• 12:56Andrew Santino?

  He is actually an assistant's assistant.

• 12:59Bobby Lee?

  Exa- assistant's assistant's assistant.

• 13:00Andrew Santino?

  He's assistant's assistant's assistant.

• 13:02Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, definitely.

• 13:03Andrew Santino?

  And for some reason-

• 13:03Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 13:04Andrew Santino?

  He's in the executive office.

• 13:05Bobby Lee?

  Right, and he thinks you're our peer, and you're not. Right? And what you're gonna realize, my little friend, okay? Is that, when you're out in the world, without us-

• 13:16Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 13:17Bobby Lee?

  You're gonna drown.

• 13:18Andrew Santino?

  You're gonna drown, pal.

• 13:19Bobby Lee?

  Right, you're gonna drown, and you're gonna drown forever.

• 13:22Andrew Santino?

  So if you want this life-saving vest-

• 13:24Bobby Lee?

  What, what, what's that smirk about, Carlos?

• 13:26Speaker 05

  About drowning forever. That made me laugh.

• 13:28Bobby Lee?

  But you're doing the thing too, like, "Oh, yeah, you're trying to make me drown."

• 13:32Andrew Santino?

  That's what that laugh was.

• 13:33Speaker 05

  You're so on edge tonight, dude, I didn't-

• 13:36Bobby Lee?

  What?

• 13:36Speaker 05

  You're on edge!

• 13:38Bobby Lee?

  I'm not on it!

• 13:40Speaker 05

  All I did was laugh.

• 13:41Bobby Lee?

  No, don't ever call me on it!

• 13:43Speaker 05

  You're a stand-up comedian and I laughed at your fucking joke.

• 13:45Bobby Lee?

  Get out of here, now you're raising your voice, you're fired, you're fired.

• 13:47Speaker 05

  I'm the tour manager.

• 13:48Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah, oh, yeah, yeah.

• 13:49Speaker 05

  You need me for the next three weeks.

• 13:51Andrew Santino?

  Stay, stay, okay, stay, stay.

• 13:53Bobby Lee?

  Don't push me, dude.

• 13:54Speaker 05

  I got it.

• 13:54Andrew Santino?

  Alright, so you made, you made the bet.

• 13:56Bobby Lee?

  This Indian, Middle Eastern guy.

• 13:58Andrew Santino?

  Okay, sure.

• 13:59Bobby Lee?

  Whatever.

• 13:59Andrew Santino?

  Yes.

• 13:59Bobby Lee?

  You know what I mean? Funny guy.

• 14:01Andrew Santino?

  He's from Iran.

• 14:02Bobby Lee?

  Funny guy.

• 14:03Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 14:03Bobby Lee?

  Right? And, you know, he's got a person he's seeing that's from a different Midwest who has certain beliefs.

• 14:11Andrew Santino?

  Sure.

• 14:11Bobby Lee?

  But I don't, I had dinner with them.

• 14:13Andrew Santino?

  That's fine.

• 14:13Bobby Lee?

  Fine, right? But he started touting off like, "Oh, for sure."

• 14:17Andrew Santino?

  They got real political.

• 14:18Bobby Lee?

  It's gonna be Trump, right? And, you know, I'm not that I, you know, I'm in the middle, you know, I was like...

• 14:27Bobby Lee?

  Can I, can I ask you something?

• 14:28Andrew Santino?

  What's going on with this show?

• 14:29Bobby Lee?

  Andrew, can I ask you something?

• 14:30Andrew Santino?

  Please.

• 14:32Bobby Lee?

  Is it me?

• 14:33Andrew Santino?

  No!

• 14:34Bobby Lee?

  What I'm seeing and I'm sensing, is it me?

• 14:37Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 14:38Bobby Lee?

  So, I'm not going insane?

• 14:40Andrew Santino?

  Tap your side right now. Tap the side of your leg.

• 14:43Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 14:44Andrew Santino?

  Because everyone in here is out of pocket. You hear that? My pockets are empty because all you guys are out of it.

• 14:49Bobby Lee?

  Dude.

• 14:49Andrew Santino?

  You're out of fucking...

• 14:50Bobby Lee?

  I'm out of pocket, yeah, I have no money in my pocket.

• 14:51Andrew Santino?

  These guys are out of pocket.

• 14:52Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 14:52Speaker 05

  It is him tonight.

• 14:54Andrew Santino?

  Oh, my god.

• 14:55Bobby Lee?

  What'd you say?

• 14:55Speaker 05

  You're vibrating with like crazy energy tonight.

• 14:58Bobby Lee?

  Oh, my god, I came here with such namaste energy, like...

• 15:00Andrew Santino?

  He was not...

• 15:01Bobby Lee?

  I came here, I came here, like Steven Seagal, namaste, dude.

• 15:06Andrew Santino?

  Namaste.

• 15:06Bobby Lee?

  And then what you're doing, dude, is you're fucking gaslighting me.

• 15:09Speaker 03

  You're making me feel nervous, Ytubavi.

• 15:11Andrew Santino?

  Wait, why?

• 15:12Bobby Lee?

  What, you too now?

• 15:13Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 15:14Bobby Lee?

  Like what?

• 15:14Speaker 03

  Your energy.

• 15:16Speaker 05

  Wow.

• 15:17Andrew Santino?

  What's going on?

• 15:22Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 15:23Andrew Santino?

  You have the floor, I want you to just...

• 15:24Bobby Lee?

  What, what? Dude, can I just ask you something?

• 15:27Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 15:28Bobby Lee?

  Are you on my side? I need you.

• 15:31Andrew Santino?

  Do me a favor.

• 15:32Bobby Lee?

  I'm telling you, I'm being real, I'm being real.

• 15:37Andrew Santino?

  I know.

• 15:37Bobby Lee?

  I need you on my side right now.

• 15:39Andrew Santino?

  Take one more bite of...

• 15:40Bobby Lee?

  Alright, I need you.

• 15:41Andrew Santino?

  Let, one more bite.

• 15:41Bobby Lee?

  I need you to go down with me if I'm gonna go down, dude.

• 15:43Andrew Santino?

  I'm right here.

• 15:44Bobby Lee?

  I'm, I love you so much.

• 15:46Andrew Santino?

  I'm right here, I love you.

• 15:47Bobby Lee?

  I don't feel any support here.

• 15:48Andrew Santino?

  Hey, I am right here.

• 15:49Bobby Lee?

  I feel no support here.

• 15:50Andrew Santino?

  I'm right here.

• 15:51Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 15:51Andrew Santino?

  But what is that? What is that?

• 16:00Bobby Lee?

  Ha, ha, ha. Ha, ha, ha.

• 16:03Andrew Santino?

  Of course I'm on your side.

• 16:04Bobby Lee?

  Okay, good. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

• 16:06Andrew Santino?

  I will never leave your side, ever. I'll never abandon you.

• 16:09Bobby Lee?

  So, um.

• 16:10Andrew Santino?

  Ever.

• 16:11Bobby Lee?

  No, I'm fine. I feel great.

• 16:14Bobby Lee?

  I feel wonderful. Thank you.

• 16:16Andrew Santino?

  Can I say something? Last night, you got a compliment at the party. We went to Bert's house for a little surprise party.

• 16:22Bobby Lee?

  It was fun.

• 16:22Andrew Santino?

  Although it wasn't a surprise.

• 16:24Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah, yeah, can I just tell you about that too?

• 16:26Andrew Santino?

  Well, what?

• 16:26Bobby Lee?

  This shit?

• 16:27Andrew Santino?

  Well, what did I?

• 16:28Bobby Lee?

  You doghole human.

• 16:28Andrew Santino?

  What did I, what did I do?

• 16:30Bobby Lee?

  You, you, fuck, fuck.

• 16:31Andrew Santino?

  What did I do?

• 16:32Bobby Lee?

  I'm gonna tell you what you did.

• 16:32Andrew Santino?

  What did I do?

• 16:34Bobby Lee?

  I'm a couple hours away. I think I'm gonna be late to this thing, and you text me, "You have to be there by 6:30."

• 16:40Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 16:40Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, you did. I can, I get the text right here.

• 16:42Andrew Santino?

  You called me.

• 16:43Bobby Lee?

  And you said I had to be there, except there's a surprise party. But what I'm saying is that, so I get there at 5:50.

• 16:49Andrew Santino?

  Mm-hmm.

• 16:50Bobby Lee?

  I wait 40 minutes, there's no one there.

• 16:52Andrew Santino?

  Mm-hmm.

• 16:52Bobby Lee?

  I'm at Bert's house. I'm just there with his wife.

• 16:56Andrew Santino?

  It's you and your brother.

• 16:58Bobby Lee?

  And my brother and, and Leanne Kreischer.

• 17:00Andrew Santino?

  What a, what a nice moment.

• 17:02Bobby Lee?

  Right, but now Bert's coming at 6:30, and now I'm the only one there saying, "Surprise."

• 17:09Bobby Lee?

  So I hear Bert come in the house, and there's like

• 17:12Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 17:12Bobby Lee?

  20 people supposed to be there.

• 17:14Andrew Santino?

  Mm-hmm.

• 17:14Bobby Lee?

  Right? He comes around the corner, and my brother, who, my, Bert's never met Steve before. And I have that little cigar case that I bought him. And we go, "Surprise." Right? And he laughed so hard

• 17:27Andrew Santino?

  Mm-hmm.

• 17:27Bobby Lee?

  because that was like the most unglorious surprise.

• 17:31Andrew Santino?

  What a comedy moment.

• 17:32Bobby Lee?

  Right.

• 17:32Andrew Santino?

  What a funny moment.

• 17:33Bobby Lee?

  Because you're the last person I ever thought that you would be here. And then you trickle it at 6:50, like, "What's your deal, amigo?"

• 17:41Andrew Santino?

  Okay, so give me a little bit of credit for a great comedy moment in both your and Bert's life. I know you. You got the text message, you didn't read it. You called old Andy, and you said, "What time do we have to be there?" Even though, boodooop, it texted us today, the invite, "This is when you're supposed to be there." So I said to you, "You gotta be there by 6:00."

• 18:03Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 18:04Andrew Santino?

  The invite said, "No need to come before 6:30."

• 18:06Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 18:07Andrew Santino?

  I did that to bait you to be there before everybody because I thought that'd be funny.

• 18:12Bobby Lee?

  It's not.

• 18:12Andrew Santino?

  It worked.

• 18:13Bobby Lee?

  It did for you.

• 18:14Andrew Santino?

  It was hilarious.

• 18:15Bobby Lee?

  End of world, okay?

• 18:16Andrew Santino?

  Because I walked in, and everybody was like, "What, how is Bobby here before anybody else?"

• 18:21Bobby Lee?

  Everybody else.

• 18:22Andrew Santino?

  It was perfect. And by the way, You're welcome. He remembered it. He talked about it all night when you left. He's like, how cool is that that Bobby was here with his brother first?

• 18:31Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 18:32Andrew Santino?

  So you're welcome.

• 18:33Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 18:33Andrew Santino?

  And I stayed all night, by the way, talking with Bert and Leanne.

• 18:36Bobby Lee?

  How long were you there till?

• 18:37Andrew Santino?

  Uh, I think I left at 10:40 or 11 o'clock.

• 18:40Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 18:41Andrew Santino?

  We talked all night.

• 18:41Bobby Lee?

  Wow.

• 18:42Andrew Santino?

  I love those people.

• 18:43Bobby Lee?

  Me too. I love them too.

• 18:44Andrew Santino?

  They're great A.

• 18:45Bobby Lee?

  I had to get out of there.

• 18:45Andrew Santino?

  And Fitzsimmons. Oh, my God.

• 18:47Bobby Lee?

  Oh, my God. What?

• 18:49Andrew Santino?

  So Bert has, Bert has dogs.

• 18:55Andrew Santino?

  Bert has dogs that are so big. I mean, it's almost shocking. You know when you see a dog that's so big you can't believe it?

• 19:03Speaker 03

  Pit bulls?

• 19:04Andrew Santino?

  They're, they're like, um.

• 19:05Bobby Lee?

  Little mastiffs.

• 19:06Andrew Santino?

  They're mastiffs, but they're mixed. So check this shit out. The first picture is, the first picture is of Steve. Steve, uh, who I'm, I loves more than anybody, is sitting on the couch. This is Bobby's brother, sitting on the couch with the dog.

• 19:20Bobby Lee?

  Tools doesn't like him that much, but.

• 19:21Andrew Santino?

  I love Steve. Look at this. There's Steve.

• 19:24Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 19:24Andrew Santino?

  And I said to Leanne, how much does that dog weigh?

• 19:28Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 19:28Andrew Santino?

  She go, I go, Steve, that dog is as big as you. The dog is 160 pounds.

• 19:33Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, he weighs more than Steve.

• 19:35Andrew Santino?

  Steve weighs 155 pounds.

• 19:37Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 19:37Andrew Santino?

  That dog is bigger than Steve.

• 19:39Bobby Lee?

  What a beautiful dog.

• 19:40Andrew Santino?

  And look at the next picture. Look at how scared Fitz was of sitting next to this dog.

• 19:43Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 19:44Andrew Santino?

  Didn't like the drool of the petting. Look at his face. Look at his fucking face, dude. That was at the end of the night. Look at the size of that dog.

• 19:51Bobby Lee?

  He's looking more and more like the old man from Up.

• 19:56Bobby Lee?

  Look at that photo, dude.

• 19:59Bobby Lee?

  I mean, I love him.

• 20:00Andrew Santino?

  I showed this photo to my wife and she didn't have her glasses on.

• 20:03Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 20:04Andrew Santino?

  And she literally goes, look at that dog. And then she goes, Ellen was there last night?

• 20:09Bobby Lee?

  No, no, no, no way. No way. There's no way.

• 20:12Andrew Santino?

  Look at how big that pup is. It's such a, by the way, sweetest dogs.

• 20:16Speaker 03

  Oh.

• 20:16Andrew Santino?

  They are so fucking sweet and, but they're ma, dude, I, I couldn't have a dog that big. I don't think you'd ever want a dog that size.

• 20:24Bobby Lee?

  But those.

• 20:24Andrew Santino?

  Imagine that thing pulling you down the street.

• 20:26Bobby Lee?

  Here we go again.

• 20:27Andrew Santino?

  You don't have the core strength.

• 20:29Bobby Lee?

  Questioning my fucking strength again, dude. I cannot believe today.

• 20:33Andrew Santino?

  You don't have the core strength.

• 20:34Bobby Lee?

  You don't have nothing.

• 20:35Andrew Santino?

  What?

• 20:36Bobby Lee?

  You have nothing either, dude.

• 20:37Andrew Santino?

  You gotta come with better than that.

• 20:38Bobby Lee?

  No, I'm not. I don't need to. I can, I can come with whatever.

• 20:42Andrew Santino?

  You see his energy today, Rudy? It's wild.

• 20:43Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 20:44Andrew Santino?

  What is that?

• 20:44Bobby Lee?

  You're right.

• 20:45Andrew Santino?

  What is going on? Get him another cookie.

• 20:51Bobby Lee?

  I'm off, I'm off.

• 20:54Speaker 06

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• 21:23Bobby Lee?

  I'm off. I'm off. You know what, I'll try chocolate croissant.

• 21:27Andrew Santino?

  Today, today is wild.

• 21:28Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I'll take a chocolate croissant.

• 21:30Andrew Santino?

  Get him a chocolate croissant, please.

• 21:32Speaker 04

  This is something.

• 21:33Andrew Santino?

  Hey, Mccone, do me a huge favor.

• 21:35Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 21:36Andrew Santino?

  Have one of those fucking things loaded in the chamber.

• 21:38Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, also, can I have another thing, dude? Um, give me a Diet Coke, if there is one. I'd really like one.

• 21:44Andrew Santino?

  I, look at me, I know what's wrong. I know what's wrong, my best friend. I know what's wrong.

• 21:49Bobby Lee?

  What's wrong?

• 21:49Andrew Santino?

  This is a, this is an emotional day. You wear your emotions on your sleeve. Rudy, help.

• 21:57Speaker 03

  Um, my birthday is on Saturday.

• 21:59Andrew Santino?

  Oh, shut the fuck up.

• 22:01Speaker 05

  He won't be here.

• 22:02Andrew Santino?

  Wait, your birthday's on Saturday?

• 22:03Bobby Lee?

  Oh.

• 22:05Speaker 03

  I'm turning 23, I feel old.

• 22:07Bobby Lee?

  23?

• 22:07Andrew Santino?

  Oh, God, you're so haggard now, you're burnt. They'd kick you out of Vegas.

• 22:11Bobby Lee?

  That's when I started stand-up.

• 22:12Andrew Santino?

  Rudy Jewell's birthday, there it is.

• 22:15Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, we'll get you something. Uh, Diet Coke?

• 22:18Andrew Santino?

  What did you get? What did you get Bert for his birthday? A box of cigars.

• 22:21Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 22:22Andrew Santino?

  You know, that's a classy move.

• 22:24Bobby Lee?

  I got him eight of them.

• 22:25Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, there were a lot, that's very expensive.

• 22:27Bobby Lee?

  I went into a cigar store. Okay, can I say something about Eric Griffin? This fucking motherfucker moves two hours away.

• 22:35Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, he lives in, uh...

• 22:36Bobby Lee?

  So then he goes, hey, come to my house and do a pod, my 300th. Not knowing, and then I look at the map.

• 22:43Andrew Santino?

  Two, two hours away.

• 22:44Bobby Lee?

  Two hours away.

• 22:45Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 22:45Bobby Lee?

  I'm out, wait, it's past Magic Mountain.

• 22:48Andrew Santino?

  There's even anything up there?

• 22:49Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I thought, I thought that's where it ended.

• 22:52Andrew Santino?

  Edge of the earth.

• 22:52Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, like I'm a flat-earther, I thought that's where it ended.

• 22:55Andrew Santino?

  You know, pass six flags or ain't nothing past six flags.

• 22:59Bobby Lee?

  So I got way out there and I'm like, oh my, I was so resentful. Because it's like.

• 23:05Andrew Santino?

  That's a far drive.

• 23:06Bobby Lee?

  If it was like Conan O'Brien.

• 23:08Andrew Santino?

  He would never live that far.

• 23:09Bobby Lee?

  Maybe.

• 23:10Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, but he's not living out there.

• 23:10Bobby Lee?

  You know what I mean? If it was like, give me a name.

• 23:12Speaker 04

  John Stewart.

• 23:13Bobby Lee?

  Yes.

• 23:14Andrew Santino?

  Absolutely. I'd drive wherever the fuck that guy went.

• 23:16Bobby Lee?

  San Francisco, I'll drive.

• 23:17Andrew Santino?

  San Francisco, I'd walk.

• 23:18Bobby Lee?

  Eric Griffin, it's like, that's a 20 minute drive.

• 23:21Andrew Santino?

  Send a car.

• 23:21Bobby Lee?

  That's my, yeah, that's the most I'll go.

• 23:23Andrew Santino?

  He should have sent the car.

• 23:24Bobby Lee?

  Fifteen, twenty minutes.

• 23:25Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 23:25Bobby Lee?

  You know what I mean?

• 23:26Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 23:26Speaker 03

  I keep seeing his ad on TikTok.

• 23:29Andrew Santino?

  Who?

• 23:29Speaker 03

  Eric Griffin.

• 23:30Andrew Santino?

  What do you mean ad?

• 23:31Bobby Lee?

  Well, for what?

• 23:32Speaker 03

  I don't know. And your ad for the hot sauce?

• 23:36Andrew Santino?

  Hot sauce?

• 23:37Speaker 03

  Or beer or something. I keep seeing.

• 23:39Andrew Santino?

  Oh, Fireball.

• 23:40Speaker 03

  Yeah, I keep seeing you on TikTok.

• 23:42Andrew Santino?

  The Fireball ad?

• 23:43Speaker 03

  Mm-hmm.

• 23:44Andrew Santino?

  Wow.

• 23:45Bobby Lee?

  You're famous.

• 23:46Andrew Santino?

  No, but they put it on TV. I didn't know it was on TikTok.

• 23:49Bobby Lee?

  It did TikTok.

• 23:50Andrew Santino?

  Oh, me and Starros, me and the, you remember Starros? Remember him? He came? The best. By the way, his movie is getting all sorts of love.

• 23:57Bobby Lee?

  It's great.

• 23:58Andrew Santino?

  You've seen it. What?

• 24:00Bobby Lee?

  Congratulations.

• 24:01Andrew Santino?

  I'm not in it. I'm saying Starros.

• 24:03Bobby Lee?

  Everything you've ever done.

• 24:05Andrew Santino?

  Oh, thank you.

• 24:05Bobby Lee?

  Look at me right now, dude.

• 24:06Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 24:07Bobby Lee?

  Look at me right now.

• 24:07Andrew Santino?

  Uh huh.

• 24:08Speaker 04

  Actually.

• 24:08Bobby Lee?

  Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop.

• 24:09Andrew Santino?

  Wait, wait, eighty-four percent audience score?

• 24:11Bobby Lee?

  That's amazing.

• 24:11Andrew Santino?

  That's fucking huge.

• 24:13Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 24:13Andrew Santino?

  Why no tomato meter?

• 24:14Speaker 04

  Cause there's too few reviews.

• 24:17Andrew Santino?

  Right, cause it's an indie.

• 24:18Bobby Lee?

  The last year.

• 24:19Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 24:19Bobby Lee?

  I've been secretly working on a movie.

• 24:22Andrew Santino?

  That's great.

• 24:24Bobby Lee?

  If you, there's a part in there.

• 24:26Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 24:28Andrew Santino?

  No. Because I heard what you already said. You said it and you didn't say it.

• 24:32Bobby Lee?

  What?

• 24:32Andrew Santino?

  You went, there's a small, if you, do you, there's a part.

• 24:35Bobby Lee?

  That's what I said.

• 24:36Andrew Santino?

  Playback the tape.

• 24:37Bobby Lee?

  I, I, I, I was.

• 24:39Andrew Santino?

  In the edit?

• 24:39Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 24:40Andrew Santino?

  Playback the tape of him going, there's a.

• 24:41Bobby Lee?

  Smart.

• 24:43Andrew Santino?

  Oh, a smart part. Oh, a smart part.

• 24:47Bobby Lee?

  Mr. Fucking, you know what I mean, assumptions over here.

• 24:50Andrew Santino?

  There's a smart part.

• 24:51Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 24:52Andrew Santino?

  For me.

• 24:53Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 24:53Andrew Santino?

  What's the character?

• 24:54Bobby Lee?

  The smart guy.

• 24:55Andrew Santino?

  Oh.

• 24:56Bobby Lee?

  Scientist.

• 24:56Andrew Santino?

  How many pages?

• 24:58Bobby Lee?

  Many pages.

• 24:59Andrew Santino?

  Money pages?

• 25:00Bobby Lee?

  Many.

• 25:00Andrew Santino?

  Many pages.

• 25:02Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, you know.

• 25:03Andrew Santino?

  How many pages of the film in general?

• 25:05Bobby Lee?

  130.

• 25:06Andrew Santino?

  You wrote a 130-page comedy script?

• 25:09Bobby Lee?

  Yep.

• 25:09Andrew Santino?

  That'll never happen.

• 25:11Bobby Lee?

  We're gonna condense it.

• 25:11Andrew Santino?

  You, I hope so.

• 25:12Bobby Lee?

  Anyway.

• 25:13Andrew Santino?

  To less than 90.

• 25:14Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 25:15Andrew Santino?

  How many pages am I in? How many smart pages am I on?

• 25:18Bobby Lee?

  10.

• 25:19Andrew Santino?

  I'm in 10.

• 25:20Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. 10 lines.

• 25:22Andrew Santino?

  How many scenes?

• 25:23Bobby Lee?

  10 lines.

• 25:24Andrew Santino?

  10 lines, how many scenes?

• 25:25Bobby Lee?

  10 lines. One scene.

• 25:27Andrew Santino?

  It's one scene, I have 10 lines.

• 25:29Bobby Lee?

  It's a small part.

• 25:30Andrew Santino?

  It's a small part.

• 25:32Andrew Santino?

  This is making sense.

• 25:33Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. Because you're not gonna do the lead.

• 25:37Andrew Santino?

  Time out. You're not the lead of the movie? It's your fucking movie.

• 25:40Bobby Lee?

  Wha- wha- wha- what's this, pal?

• 25:43Speaker 04

  Bad coke.

• 25:46Bobby Lee?

  Can I get a can, or?

• 25:49Andrew Santino?

  Wow. Bryson got that, right?

• 25:50Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 25:51Andrew Santino?

  Bryson, very nice of you, bud. What's the premise of this movie you've put together? And when you say I've been working on it secretly, you haven't been at the computer.

• 25:59Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, but I've been meeting up with the writer.

• 26:00Andrew Santino?

  Telling him what to do.

• 26:02Bobby Lee?

  Well, we go through beats of the movie and we, you know, I mean.

• 26:03Andrew Santino?

  Okay, I like that.

• 26:04Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 26:05Andrew Santino?

  I like that.

• 26:05Bobby Lee?

  His name is Mike McGrail.

• 26:06Andrew Santino?

  Not, I love it. And then, so what's the premise of the film?

• 26:10Bobby Lee?

  Well, it's set in the 90s. And there's a border crossing between Canada and the US.

• 26:16Andrew Santino?

  Mm-hmm.

• 26:17Bobby Lee?

  It's in, it's in Washington. And it's, it, no one crosses it. Like, once a year, I get two cars to cross it. So that, there's a little, it's in the 90s and this is a little border, uh, patrol, like, three agents that work at that little.

• 26:29Andrew Santino?

  Is this based on a true story?

• 26:30Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, it's a real place.

• 26:31Andrew Santino?

  Okay.

• 26:32Bobby Lee?

  Right? And, um, generally, the three that are there are like, not the best border, you know, there's nothing to do.

• 26:38Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 26:38Bobby Lee?

  So there's like pranks between the, you know, I mean, the Canadian border and this and that. Meanwhile, a real threat is coming over.

• 26:45Andrew Santino?

  Great idea.

• 26:46Bobby Lee?

  Right? And we're, we're, a bunch of bumbling, kind of, you know.

• 26:50Andrew Santino?

  I hope, I really, I hope that goes, because that would be fucking rad. The story's rad.

• 26:54Bobby Lee?

  But there's a, um, a scene where you're a.

• 26:56Andrew Santino?

  No. You're not gonna get me to do that. I mean this from all my heart. I will never do that movie. No chance.

• 27:05Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 27:06Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, I love you.

• 27:07Bobby Lee?

  I love you too, man.

• 27:07Andrew Santino?

  You wouldn't do that if it was the other way. You know that.

• 27:10Bobby Lee?

  Oh, I've done it before.

• 27:11Andrew Santino?

  Name it.

• 27:13Bobby Lee?

  Every movie I've ever been in.

• 27:14Andrew Santino?

  No, no, if it was the other way with this, with you and I.

• 27:16Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 27:17Andrew Santino?

  No, no, if it was the other way, if I did it.

• 27:19Bobby Lee?

  Okay, so I know that Spade and Theo has a movie, right?

• 27:22Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 27:23Bobby Lee?

  And they might offer me a small part in it.

• 27:25Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 27:26Bobby Lee?

  I will do it.

• 27:26Andrew Santino?

  You're not listening to a word I'm saying. If this was the other way, and I did, and I said, we have a small part for you, you're not doing it. Do you get it?

• 27:33Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I would.

• 27:34Andrew Santino?

  No, you wouldn't.

• 27:35Bobby Lee?

  You have your mind?

• 27:36Andrew Santino?

  Test, test, test. No, he wouldn't.

• 27:38Bobby Lee?

  What's a test?

• 27:38Andrew Santino?

  I'm testing these guys because they know.

• 27:40Speaker 04

  He does say yes to a lot of his friends.

• 27:43Bobby Lee?

  I do.

• 27:43Andrew Santino?

  It podcasts.

• 27:44Bobby Lee?

  No, I did that Robert Kelly thing on the fucking thing that was terrible.

• 27:48Andrew Santino?

  But this is me and you. It's different than those people. You wouldn't do it if I did this thing.

• 27:53Bobby Lee?

  It's a funny, really scene-stealing kind of part, though. It's not like some throwaway thing. It's like you're gonna steal the movie with it.

• 28:01Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 28:02Bobby Lee?

  You know what I mean? It's super funny. There's violence in it.

• 28:05Andrew Santino?

  I would.

• 28:05Bobby Lee?

  You make me so mad.

• 28:06Andrew Santino?

  I'm gonna go to the theater and I'm gonna go, man, I wish I was in this.

• 28:08Bobby Lee?

  I'm asking you for a favor, dude.

• 28:11Andrew Santino?

  I don't like favors.

• 28:13Bobby Lee?

  I'm asking you for a favor.

• 28:15Andrew Santino?

  Okay, you know what?

• 28:16Bobby Lee?

  What?

• 28:17Andrew Santino?

  Okay, that's fine.

• 28:18Bobby Lee?

  You throw me, I'll do whatever.

• 28:19Andrew Santino?

  No, I'm serious. You're right. No, you're right. And I say yes now. Listen, I'm saying yes. Hold on. Hey.

• 28:24Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 28:26Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, can I speak to Vic?

• 28:28Bobby Lee?

  Who's Vic?

• 28:29Andrew Santino?

  This is, I'm calling Morgan Stanley, the bank. They're my loan. Hey, guys. Hey, Vic, are we on? Hey, hey, do you think I could pay my mortgage with favors? Yeah, our bills. Could I pay them with favors?

• 28:45Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 28:45Andrew Santino?

  Did they take favor slips?

• 28:46Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 28:47Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, like if I can't pay my fucking mortgage this month, is it cool if I say it's for a favor?

• 28:51Bobby Lee?

  Hold on.

• 28:51Andrew Santino?

  Could they do a favor for me?

• 28:53Bobby Lee?

  What's up?

• 28:55Andrew Santino?

  All right, Vic, I'll talk to you.

• 28:56Bobby Lee?

  You all right?

• 28:56Andrew Santino?

  Bye. He's actually getting a phone call.

• 29:00Bobby Lee?

  Done, right?

• 29:04Bobby Lee?

  Gene Hong.

• 29:05Andrew Santino?

  Fucking cut it out.

• 29:06Bobby Lee?

  You made, you called Morgan and Morgan.

• 29:10Andrew Santino?

  You know I'll do whatever you want. I would do anything for you. And let me have a moment.

• 29:14Bobby Lee?

  I'm gonna call Amir though.

• 29:15Andrew Santino?

  Let me have a moment with you.

• 29:16Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 29:17Andrew Santino?

  I mean it. You know I would do anything for you anytime.

• 29:19Bobby Lee?

  I know.

• 29:19Andrew Santino?

  For the rest of my life.

• 29:20Bobby Lee?

  After this.

• 29:21Andrew Santino?

  Alright.

• 29:22Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I'm on, I'm on Bad Friends right now and I, I think I lost.

• 29:26Speaker 05

  Get that money out and get it ready, buddy.

• 29:31Bobby Lee?

  I know dude, I, I admit, I was wrong and I lost and I'm gonna give you the 500. What?

• 29:38Speaker 05

  And you know, man, tell this man how wrong he was, man.

• 29:40Andrew Santino?

  He was wrong, man!

• 29:42Speaker 05

  Yeah, man!

• 29:44Bobby Lee?

  So Amir.

• 29:45Speaker 05

  Yeah, man!

• 29:46Andrew Santino?

  I love Amir.

• 29:47Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, so it's, it's, yeah.

• 29:48Speaker 05

  Cash money, Andrew, cash money.

• 29:50Bobby Lee?

  500 dude.

• 29:51Andrew Santino?

  No, no, he said, Amir, you said it was a thousand.

• 29:54Speaker 05

  Yeah, it was a thousand.

• 29:55Bobby Lee?

  It was a $500, Amir. If you wanna go down this road, I can go down this road with you, dude.

• 30:01Speaker 05

  Trump's America, that is a thousand bucks, brother.

• 30:04Bobby Lee?

  Alright, brother. I'm going to Australia tomorrow. When I get back, I'll get the 500.

• 30:08Speaker 05

  Beautiful, I love you guys.

• 30:09Bobby Lee?

  I love you, buddy.

• 30:10Andrew Santino?

  Love you, dude. He's so funny, by the way.

• 30:12Bobby Lee?

  Now I feel better because now, because he was the only one I bet it with.

• 30:15Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 30:15Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. Alright, I feel better.

• 30:17Andrew Santino?

  Good.

• 30:18Bobby Lee?

  I accept it.

• 30:18Andrew Santino?

  Accept this, you know I'm gonna do the movie.

• 30:20Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 30:20Andrew Santino?

  I would do anything for you and I mean it. Now, look at me, don't, don't brush me off.

• 30:24Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, but you're gonna-

• 30:24Andrew Santino?

  I do a bit for the show.

• 30:25Bobby Lee?

  You're gonna be so mad. There's no part in the movie for you.

• 30:41Bobby Lee?

  I'm kidding, there is. Let's move on. Well, I'm not, I'm not doing it. Yeah, you are.

• 30:46Andrew Santino?

  No, I'm not.

• 30:49Andrew Santino?

  Let's be real. I'm not doing it.

• 30:53Andrew Santino?

  I would never. Fuck that.

• 30:54Bobby Lee?

  Fuck it.

• 30:55Andrew Santino?

  Give him the, yes, give him a churro. Please give him the churro.

• 30:57Bobby Lee?

  Give me a churro.

• 30:58Andrew Santino?

  Put it in, keep it in the chamber, dude.

• 30:59Bobby Lee?

  Give it, I want a plate, please. Give me a plate.

• 31:02Speaker 03

  You're eating a lot.

• 31:04Andrew Santino?

  No, he's not.

• 31:05Speaker 03

  You're gonna puke again.

• 31:06Bobby Lee?

  I know. I did go with him, but yeah.

• 31:09Andrew Santino?

  He's already, you didn't take it today?

• 31:10Bobby Lee?

  Yesterday I took it.

• 31:11Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, not today.

• 31:12Bobby Lee?

  It's a one week. Once a week.

• 31:14Andrew Santino?

  Oh shit.

• 31:15Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I'm gurgling.

• 31:16Andrew Santino?

  You're gurgling.

• 31:17Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, but I need to do it because I'm just, I don't know what else.

• 31:19Andrew Santino?

  Cause it's fun.

• 31:19Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 31:20Andrew Santino?

  You'll be fine.

• 31:21Bobby Lee?

  You found it, because this guy's the best.

• 31:23Andrew Santino?

  We don't, we don't even have, oh, in the cabinets.

• 31:25Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 31:26Andrew Santino?

  Let me, let me say this, that does sound like a fucking phenomenal movie idea. I really do, I really like that. Like, I think it does sound dope. I think you're gonna kill it.

• 31:32Bobby Lee?

  They're not gonna, they're not gonna do it.

• 31:34Andrew Santino?

  Why would they not? I don't even understand why.

• 31:36Bobby Lee?

  We don't even have a thing yet, you know?

• 31:37Andrew Santino?

  With the production team that they've got behind it, that's, people are gonna wanna do that.

• 31:41Bobby Lee?

  But, um, yeah. That's what my dream cast would be.

• 31:45Andrew Santino?

  That's your dream cast?

• 31:46Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 31:47Andrew Santino?

  Oh.

• 31:47Bobby Lee?

  They're not attached to it. I just like, I want, for this, I want him, I want him, and then I want...

• 31:55Andrew Santino?

  What's so funny?

• 31:55Bobby Lee?

  What's so funny? Cause let me tell you something about your dream cast.

• 32:00Bobby Lee?

  For the zombie movie.

• 32:00Andrew Santino?

  I knew that was coming.

• 32:01Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 32:02Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 32:03Bobby Lee?

  I don't know who these other people are, but I know that who's not in it. Us two. And now, I swear to God, on my mother's life.

• 32:13Andrew Santino?

  Oh, that's...

• 32:13Bobby Lee?

  On my mother's life, I will never do it.

• 32:18Bobby Lee?

  Fucking piss me off now, dude. You just lost me, dude.

• 32:21Andrew Santino?

  This is what you get.

• 32:22Bobby Lee?

  You piece of shit, dude.

• 32:23Andrew Santino?

  This is what you get.

• 32:24Bobby Lee?

  I'm glad you're not, I need a break from you, dude. I'm glad you're not going to Australia.

• 32:28Andrew Santino?

  Oh shit.

• 32:28Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 32:29Andrew Santino?

  You wanna tell him?

• 32:30Bobby Lee?

  What? He's going?

• 32:31Andrew Santino?

  Him and his wife and the baby are coming.

• 32:36Bobby Lee?

  How?

• 32:37Andrew Santino?

  They asked if they could make a family vacation.

• 32:39Bobby Lee?

  But that's the whole time.

• 32:41Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 32:46Bobby Lee?

  No.

• 32:46Andrew Santino?

  Don't.

• 32:47Bobby Lee?

  I know it's coming.

• 32:48Andrew Santino?

  I can hear it. Oh.

• 32:51Bobby Lee?

  It's coming, yeah.

• 32:52Andrew Santino?

  We've, Rudy, I haven't talked to you all night, I'm sorry.

• 32:54Bobby Lee?

  You talk to her. I need, I need time.

• 32:55Andrew Santino?

  How are you?

• 32:56Speaker 03

  I'm good, how are you?

• 32:57Andrew Santino?

  What's going on in your world right now?

• 32:59Speaker 03

  Um, nothing.

• 33:01Andrew Santino?

  You feeling, you feeling good, you feeling bad? What's going, what do you, what's, what's the news?

• 33:06Speaker 03

  Well, I'm scared for the election.

• 33:08Andrew Santino?

  You are? Well, it's over. When this podcast comes out, it's over.

• 33:11Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 33:12Andrew Santino?

  So how do you feel? It's over, it happened.

• 33:14Speaker 03

  Kamala!

• 33:18Andrew Santino?

  Whatever you say.

• 33:19Speaker 03

  Yeah, so I don't, I'm not gonna get deported.

• 33:22Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you will. You'll get deported regardless. You will.

• 33:26Speaker 03

  Why?

• 33:27Andrew Santino?

  If we have anything to do with it.

• 33:29Speaker 03

  But you guys are helping.

• 33:30Andrew Santino?

  We are. We're gonna keep you in this country for as long as.

• 33:31Bobby Lee?

  Let me ask you something. If, if there was some, like, you know, Trump was like, you know, I wanna get everyone out of here.

• 33:37Andrew Santino?

  Mm-hmm.

• 33:37Bobby Lee?

  Do you think you and I have, be able to figure out her situation or no?

• 33:41Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, we would use like the, the famous card and we'd get.

• 33:44Bobby Lee?

  I think that would have to go through, we'd have to go through Rogan maybe.

• 33:47Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, we'd have to go through somebody to keep her here. Yeah, Rogan would, I mean, yeah.

• 33:50Bobby Lee?

  Call Trump, cuz you'd endorsed him.

• 33:52Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, please keep her here.

• 33:53Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, keep her.

• 33:53Andrew Santino?

  He's not gonna kick you out.

• 33:54Bobby Lee?

  He's not gonna kick you out.

• 33:55Andrew Santino?

  I promise.

• 33:55Speaker 03

  Hopefully.

• 33:56Andrew Santino?

  No, he's more likely to kick, kick Andres out, for sure.

• 34:00Bobby Lee?

  Well, at least revoke.

• 34:02Andrew Santino?

  Right, re- yeah, revoke. Yeah, you can.

• 34:04Bobby Lee?

  Citizenship, because.

• 34:05Andrew Santino?

  You'd find out what kind of trash bag he really is.

• 34:07Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 34:07Andrew Santino?

  So, nothing is going on in your world?

• 34:10Speaker 03

  Uh.

• 34:10Andrew Santino?

  You're in the, you're in school right now?

• 34:12Speaker 03

  Yeah, I don't know if I can say it, but I got, I got dumped by my friends.

• 34:18Andrew Santino?

  Wait, dumped? I'm sorry, your boyfriend, you mean?

• 34:21Speaker 03

  Friends.

• 34:22Andrew Santino?

  Wait, your friend dumped you?

• 34:23Bobby Lee?

  Tell us what happened. Let us be helpful.

• 34:26Speaker 03

  Okay, but you guys are also the reason why I got dumped.

• 34:32Andrew Santino?

  What the fuck did we?

• 34:33Bobby Lee?

  Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Please.

• 34:38Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 34:38Bobby Lee?

  Be honest.

• 34:39Speaker 03

  Remember when I told you I went to that party? Uh, Hermosa?

• 34:45Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 34:45Andrew Santino?

  More details.

• 34:46Bobby Lee?

  I remember.

• 34:47Speaker 05

  Sharkies.

• 34:48Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 34:49Bobby Lee?

  Those cowboys and stuff there, you said?

• 34:50Speaker 03

  Yeah, and you guys said I needed new friends because my current friends were trash.

• 34:55Andrew Santino?

  I didn't, we didn't say that.

• 34:57Bobby Lee?

  Insane.

• 34:57Andrew Santino?

  I don't think we said that at all.

• 34:59Speaker 03

  Yeah, you did.

• 35:00Bobby Lee?

  We said trash?

• 35:01Speaker 03

  I think so. And then they heard about it.

• 35:04Bobby Lee?

  From who?

• 35:05Speaker 03

  From the podcast.

• 35:06Andrew Santino?

  Why are they listening?

• 35:07Bobby Lee?

  Why are they listening to the podcast?

• 35:08Speaker 03

  That's what I'm saying, but then I guess they're listening.

• 35:11Bobby Lee?

  And then what they say?

• 35:12Speaker 03

  And then they ghosted me.

• 35:13Andrew Santino?

  Wow.

• 35:15Bobby Lee?

  They ghosted you?

• 35:16Andrew Santino?

  They know this is a comedy package, we're fucking kidding?

• 35:19Speaker 03

  I explained it in a long letter. Apologizing for hurting their feelings.

• 35:25Andrew Santino?

  No, no, no, no, no. Are you being fucking real right now, dude? Okay.

• 35:28Bobby Lee?

  I am so livid. Oh my god.

• 35:30Andrew Santino?

  First of all.

• 35:30Bobby Lee?

  Don't get me started, dude. What's going on?

• 35:32Andrew Santino?

  You shouldn't have to apologize. We're joking around.

• 35:35Bobby Lee?

  We're joking around.

• 35:35Andrew Santino?

  And you never said anything bad.

• 35:36Bobby Lee?

  You never said anything bad?

• 35:37Speaker 03

  They did it like that. I called them party girls. I wa- I wanna, I need a party girl.

• 35:42Bobby Lee?

  It's the re- you know what? I'm glad Trump won. I can't, I can't. That's the part, I can't, I can't.

• 35:50Andrew Santino?

  Yes.

• 35:50Bobby Lee?

  I can't, I'm done.

• 35:52Andrew Santino?

  You're done.

• 35:52Bobby Lee?

  I'm done with it.

• 35:53Andrew Santino?

  It's gone too far.

• 35:54Bobby Lee?

  It's two cents. I hate it.

• 35:55Andrew Santino?

  They don't want to be called party girls?

• 35:57Bobby Lee?

  Oh my god.

• 35:58Andrew Santino?

  Why is party girl, is that, and what world would that be like, would that be defamatory?

• 36:03Bobby Lee?

  Oh my god.

• 36:03Andrew Santino?

  Party girl?

• 36:04Speaker 03

  I wanna party.

• 36:06Andrew Santino?

  Fuck yeah, you're a party girl.

• 36:07Bobby Lee?

  You're a party girl. I'm a party guy.

• 36:09Andrew Santino?

  I'm a party boy.

• 36:10Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 36:12Speaker 03

  Yeah, so they didn't.

• 36:13Andrew Santino?

  So wait, they said they called us party, clearly.

• 36:15Bobby Lee?

  So, okay, what did they, so, they called you and goes, we can't believe it.

• 36:19Speaker 03

  No, they ghosted me.

• 36:21Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, but, but you're, you're assuming that the ghost is attached to that.

• 36:25Speaker 03

  Yep.

• 36:26Bobby Lee?

  So I, I wanna know how you know that they saw it. Cause they must have said something.

• 36:30Andrew Santino?

  Somebody.

• 36:31Speaker 03

  Someone from that group that's like, I'm close to them. I texted her personally.

• 36:37Bobby Lee?

  Uh huh.

• 36:37Speaker 03

  And then she said, yeah, we didn't like what you said in the podcast and you hurt our feelings.

• 36:45Andrew Santino?

  Okay, first of all, we hurt the feelings. You didn't do that.

• 36:48Speaker 03

  And then I said, party girls.

• 36:50Bobby Lee?

  Okay, so then you said party girls.

• 36:51Speaker 03

  And I kinda nodded when you guys said you need new friends.

• 36:55Andrew Santino?

  It's a fucking joke. It's a comedy podcast.

• 36:58Bobby Lee?

  I, I, I, I, I.

• 36:59Speaker 03

  I, I explained that. It's comedy.

• 37:02Bobby Lee?

  I'm out, I'm, I'm, I'm out.

• 37:03Speaker 04

  Explain it on a letter. Nobody reads letters.

• 37:05Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 37:06Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 37:07Bobby Lee?

  Or let, let's try to make amends now.

• 37:09Speaker 03

  They're not gonna listen.

• 37:10Bobby Lee?

  Yes, but they listened to the last one.

• 37:13Speaker 03

  I don't know.

• 37:13Bobby Lee?

  So, party girls. Well, no, I mean, I don't know their names, so I don't know how to address them.

• 37:18Andrew Santino?

  Listen up, party girl.

• 37:19Bobby Lee?

  No, no, no, how about Jules's ex-friends?

• 37:22Andrew Santino?

  Jules's ex-friend.

• 37:23Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Listen to me right now.

• 37:25Andrew Santino?

  By the way, you guys are only creating a monster. She's gonna become a superhero now because of this, right?

• 37:29Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 37:29Andrew Santino?

  You're fueling her fire.

• 37:30Bobby Lee?

  Okay. So, um.

• 37:36Bobby Lee?

  Ladies, okay, Jules is probably one of the best human beings I've ever met in my whole entire life.

• 37:43Andrew Santino?

  Fact.

• 37:44Bobby Lee?

  She's a daughter to me. I, I love her like I have my own flesh and blood. I really believe that.

• 37:49Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, me too.

• 37:50Bobby Lee?

  I feel that, okay? And there's not a bad bone in her body.

• 37:54Andrew Santino?

  Nope.

• 37:56Bobby Lee?

  Some of this podcasting, mumbo jumbo, we're forcing her to do it really, to be honest with you, because she's so good. You know, I mean, she's just perfect for the show.

• 38:04Andrew Santino?

  She's brilliant.

• 38:05Bobby Lee?

  Because she's innocent, right? There are just certain dynamics that work well with us, you know, her personality, and so we bring her on here. You know what I mean? She's, she's game, right?

• 38:16Andrew Santino?

  She's game.

• 38:16Bobby Lee?

  A lot of times, um, she's just kind of going along with what we're saying.

• 38:21Andrew Santino?

  She's just having fun.

• 38:22Bobby Lee?

  She's having fun, but is she? Sometimes she's not.

• 38:24Speaker 03

  I'm having fun.

• 38:25Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, but, but, but at the end of the day, um, you know, if you take that personally.

• 38:32Andrew Santino?

  Come on.

• 38:34Bobby Lee?

  Keep going?

• 38:34Andrew Santino?

  Yes.

• 38:35Bobby Lee?

  All right. You're gonna die.

• 38:37Andrew Santino?

  You're gonna die. The world is a scary place.

• 38:41Bobby Lee?

  I mean, not like, I'm not gonna, I'm just saying.

• 38:43Andrew Santino?

  No, we're not gonna kill you.

• 38:44Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, we're not gonna kill you. I'm just saying, life is gonna just fucking.

• 38:48Andrew Santino?

  It's gonna eat you alive.

• 38:48Bobby Lee?

  Come down on you and press you into the dirt.

• 38:51Andrew Santino?

  Yes.

• 38:52Bobby Lee?

  All right, and just smudge your face deep into the dirt.

• 38:54Andrew Santino?

  And then when you, once you learn.

• 38:56Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 38:56Andrew Santino?

  That Jules is not the.

• 38:58Bobby Lee?

  Are you out of your mind?

• 39:00Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, that's a, it's a.

• 39:01Bobby Lee?

  Life is hard. I'm so sorry.

• 39:03Andrew Santino?

  And Jules is not the culprit here. We.

• 39:05Bobby Lee?

  We are. We're the evil ones.

• 39:06Andrew Santino?

  Yes, she's not. She's just having fun. Innocent.

• 39:09Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 39:10Andrew Santino?

  And, and, and if that is gonna sever our friendship because of a dumb joke that him and I made.

• 39:14Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 39:15Andrew Santino?

  That's not chill.

• 39:15Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. We know you're not party girls. We know that you're intelligent, ethical, moral, sensitive.

• 39:27Andrew Santino?

  Sensitive for sure.

• 39:31Bobby Lee?

  What? Say it. Weak, yeah.

• 39:33Andrew Santino?

  A little weak.

• 39:34Bobby Lee?

  Weak, yeah.

• 39:34Andrew Santino?

  A little weak.

• 39:35Bobby Lee?

  Tender.

• 39:36Andrew Santino?

  Soft.

• 39:37Bobby Lee?

  Tender, soft.

• 39:38Andrew Santino?

  Pliable.

• 39:39Bobby Lee?

  Pliable, yeah, yeah.

• 39:40Andrew Santino?

  Valuable.

• 39:40Bobby Lee?

  Valuable, yeah, valuable. Valuable, I like that word, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 39:43Andrew Santino?

  Valuable, but valuable.

• 39:44Bobby Lee?

  Valuable, but malleable.

• 39:45Andrew Santino?

  And look.

• 39:46Bobby Lee?

  Right.

• 39:46Andrew Santino?

  We don't know you and we love you.

• 39:48Bobby Lee?

  We love you.

• 39:48Andrew Santino?

  And we want you to know that Jules loves you.

• 39:50Bobby Lee?

  But we also.

• 39:50Andrew Santino?

  And she's a sensitive soul too, and she doesn't like someone taking a joke that these two morons made to heart, because we're dumb idiots. We really are. Look at the set that we're on.

• 40:01Bobby Lee?

  The set that we're on.

• 40:02Andrew Santino?

  Look, we're inside of a McDonald's. I mean, give me a break. We're morons.

• 40:06Bobby Lee?

  We're morons.

• 40:06Andrew Santino?

  And we're just trying to have fun. And please don't take it.

• 40:09Bobby Lee?

  We're just two guys.

• 40:09Andrew Santino?

  Don't take it out on Jules.

• 40:10Bobby Lee?

  Just having fun.

• 40:11Andrew Santino?

  Two guys just having fun.

• 40:12Bobby Lee?

  So Jules is a great girl, and if it's, you know, at the end of the day, I honestly believe this, it's so your loss.

• 40:18Andrew Santino?

  That's your loss if you don't wanna be friendly.

• 40:19Bobby Lee?

  Really? Because this is a rising person.

• 40:21Andrew Santino?

  This is a great human.

• 40:22Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, he's rising.

• 40:23Andrew Santino?

  He's gonna lose a good human.

• 40:24Bobby Lee?

  You know what she is, dude? You know what she is? What? Remember she Logan?

• 40:28Andrew Santino?

  Logan Paul?

• 40:29Bobby Lee?

  No, not Logan Paul, the movie Logan.

• 40:32Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah, Logan. The origin story?

• 40:34Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 40:35Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 40:35Bobby Lee?

  Remember the little girl?

• 40:36Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yes.

• 40:37Bobby Lee?

  With the two claws?

• 40:38Andrew Santino?

  Yes.

• 40:39Bobby Lee?

  Right?

• 40:39Speaker 04

  She's from Spain.

• 40:40Bobby Lee?

  She's from Spain, yeah?

• 40:41Andrew Santino?

  Shut up, Andres.

• 40:42Bobby Lee?

  Okay, zoom in on that.

• 40:45Andrew Santino?

  That's Rudy.

• 40:46Bobby Lee?

  Is Rudy.

• 40:48Andrew Santino?

  That's Rudy.

• 40:49Bobby Lee?

  Cause she loves knives, right? And so, hey, party girls, you wanna fuck with that?

• 40:53Andrew Santino?

  I wouldn't.

• 40:54Bobby Lee?

  I wouldn't fuck with that.

• 40:55Andrew Santino?

  I'd want that on my side.

• 40:56Bobby Lee?

  Right. See that body right there? That was a party boy.

• 40:58Andrew Santino?

  That was a party boy.

• 40:59Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. And she destroyed him, right? So, if you don't call her back, you're gonna have war with us.

• 41:07Andrew Santino?

  That's right, you don't want that.

• 41:08Bobby Lee?

  You don't want that.

• 41:09Andrew Santino?

  That's bad.

• 41:09Bobby Lee?

  You call her back, you invite her back to Moose McIllicuddy's or wherever you guys go.

• 41:13Andrew Santino?

  It was Moose McIllicuddy.

• 41:14Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, or whatever, right? Or Sharky's Pizza? Or wood fire, Mexican food, whatever it is.

• 41:20Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, pit fire.

• 41:20Bobby Lee?

  Pit fire?

• 41:21Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 41:21Bobby Lee?

  Right, right? And you go out and hang out with these fucking-

• 41:24Andrew Santino?

  You have fun.

• 41:25Bobby Lee?

  Have fun. And just know that you're party girls.

• 41:27Andrew Santino?

  Know that you are party girls.

• 41:29Bobby Lee?

  You know what? I'm gonna double down on it. You are party girls.

• 41:31Andrew Santino?

  You're absolutely party girl.

• 41:32Bobby Lee?

  Right? And-

• 41:33Andrew Santino?

  Because we get mad at the things we are.

• 41:35Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, we get mad at the things we are.

• 41:36Andrew Santino?

  And you got mad cause somebody called you a party girl? Because you're a party girl, party girl.

• 41:41Andrew Santino?

  We did a full fucking tweet. We came right back to where we started.

• 41:43Bobby Lee?

  We don't care. Yeah, you know what? I'm good. No, you know what? I'm gonna go this way. Stop, stop. Good. Don't ever talk to them again. Yeah, yeah, I'm talking, no, I'm not, yeah, don't ever talk to them again. I, I just thought about it. It's fucking uncalled for.

• 41:58Andrew Santino?

  You deserve cool friends that-

• 42:00Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, cool friends.

• 42:00Andrew Santino?

  That have, that don't care about two idiots saying something dumb.

• 42:04Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 42:05Speaker 03

  It's just awkward going to school, cause I see them.

• 42:07Andrew Santino?

  I'm sorry.

• 42:08Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah?

• 42:08Andrew Santino?

  Well, I don't want you to-

• 42:09Bobby Lee?

  You know what, dude? Don't see them.

• 42:11Andrew Santino?

  Well, it's cool.

• 42:12Bobby Lee?

  Don't see them.

• 42:12Andrew Santino?

  Pretty small.

• 42:13Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, what?

• 42:14Speaker 03

  In school? I can see them, though.

• 42:16Bobby Lee?

  But I, I see people that I don't see. No, you're still listening to this, right?

• 42:22Andrew Santino?

  This is true.

• 42:22Bobby Lee?

  This is true, dude.

• 42:23Andrew Santino?

  He did it yesterday.

• 42:23Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I do it, yeah, I do it all the time. If there's somebody at a party I don't like-

• 42:26Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you don't see them.

• 42:27Bobby Lee?

  I see them, but I don't.

• 42:28Andrew Santino?

  I didn't know you were there.

• 42:29Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I saw, I see right through them.

• 42:30Andrew Santino?

  I didn't even see you were at the party.

• 42:31Bobby Lee?

  See right through them.

• 42:32Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 42:32Bobby Lee?

  Okay?

• 42:33Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 42:34Bobby Lee?

  They're nothing.

• 42:34Andrew Santino?

  That's great.

• 42:35Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. You're in a movie, okay? You know, I'll tell you something right now. There was a movie called Commando.

• 42:40Andrew Santino?

  Love.

• 42:41Bobby Lee?

  Do you remember the movie Commando?

• 42:43Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 42:43Bobby Lee?

  Who was in the movie Commando? Um, Carlos?

• 42:45Andrew Santino?

  McConaughey doesn't know.

• 42:46Bobby Lee?

  McConaughey, do you know?

• 42:46Speaker 04

  I actually haven't seen Commando.

• 42:47Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Who's in it? Andres? Arnold. Durol Arnold in Commando, right? There's a scene in Commando, well, this is probably, I could use probably a million other movies.

• 42:56Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 42:56Bobby Lee?

  I don't know why, I don't know why I used Commando, it just came to my mind.

• 42:59Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 42:59Bobby Lee?

  Cause I just remember watching Commando as a kid. And there was like a couple of people exploding in the background.

• 43:04Andrew Santino?

  Love.

• 43:04Bobby Lee?

  Right? And I'm like, I always thought to myself, oh, that actor, he had not much to do. Yeah, yeah. So that was Commando.

• 43:11Andrew Santino?

  It's Mr. Steely, your girl.

• 43:12Bobby Lee?

  But if you see that, right, there's a million people that die in back of them. They explode, they get shot up and whatever, right, right? A lot of times, it's like that. Be Commando.

• 43:20Andrew Santino?

  Be Commando.

• 43:21Bobby Lee?

  Right.

• 43:21Andrew Santino?

  Shoot them up.

• 43:22Bobby Lee?

  Shoot them up, dude.

• 43:23Andrew Santino?

  Well, don't literally, but metaphorically, shoot them up.

• 43:25Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Be that guy.

• 43:27Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 43:27Bobby Lee?

  And with the little Logan girl. Like a combo, combo deal.

• 43:30Speaker 03

  Okay.

• 43:31Andrew Santino?

  Commando Logan.

• 43:32Bobby Lee?

  Dude, you're Commando Logan, dude.

• 43:33Andrew Santino?

  You're Commando Logan.

• 43:34Bobby Lee?

  In fact, when you turned, Saturday, that's your new name.

• 43:37Andrew Santino?

  Commando Logan.

• 43:38Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 43:39Andrew Santino?

  Salute. Commando Logan.

• 43:48Andrew Santino?

  That's British.

• 43:49Bobby Lee?

  Is it?

• 43:50Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, that's the British.

• 43:51Bobby Lee?

  There's no way, that's US.

• 43:52Andrew Santino?

  No, that's British.

• 43:53Bobby Lee?

  That's, no way, dude.

• 43:54Andrew Santino?

  That's British.

• 43:55Bobby Lee?

  This?

• 43:56Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 44:01Andrew Santino?

  Doing my national anthem, are you? Bees on toast, loves it when you do that.

• 44:05Bobby Lee?

  Is that really British?

• 44:06Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 44:07Bobby Lee?

  What is it?

• 44:07Andrew Santino?

  That's ours.

• 44:08Bobby Lee?

  Thank you.

• 44:09Andrew Santino?

  Yeah. Hey.

• 44:10Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. It's British.

• 44:12Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it's British.

• 44:12Bobby Lee?

  I know, you're right.

• 44:13Andrew Santino?

  That's all right.

• 44:13Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. Uh, so I have a crush.

• 44:15Andrew Santino?

  You have a little new crush?

• 44:16Bobby Lee?

  It's a gay, and that's a gay.

• 44:18Andrew Santino?

  Whoa! Ring the bell?

• 44:20Bobby Lee?

  No, no.

• 44:20Andrew Santino?

  I finally got you to come out on this show. After all these years of doing the three card Monte. He finally picked us a woman.

• 44:27Bobby Lee?

  It's a smart role, it's a smart role.

• 44:28Andrew Santino?

  Oh, it is? Go ahead, who, who's the crush?

• 44:31Bobby Lee?

  Charles Milton.

• 44:34Andrew Santino?

  So it is gay.

• 44:35Bobby Lee?

  No, I just think he's hot.

• 44:37Andrew Santino?

  What do you mean? What do you mean?

• 44:40Bobby Lee?

  What do you mean?

• 44:41Andrew Santino?

  You said, no, it's not gay.

• 44:42Bobby Lee?

  It's not gay.

• 44:43Speaker 03

  That's gay.

• 44:43Andrew Santino?

  That's gay.

• 44:44Bobby Lee?

  It's not gay.

• 44:45Andrew Santino?

  How is, how isn't?

• 44:47Bobby Lee?

  Cause I'm, I hung out with him. I went bowling with him.

• 44:50Andrew Santino?

  Right, so you're gay.

• 44:51Bobby Lee?

  No, he taught me how to bowl.

• 44:53Andrew Santino?

  I've heard that before.

• 44:54Bobby Lee?

  What?

• 44:55Andrew Santino?

  A guy?

• 44:55Bobby Lee?

  He really, no, honestly, he really, really did. He's like, dude, the under, cause you know how I bowl and I go underhand?

• 45:00Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you flip it.

• 45:00Bobby Lee?

  He goes, he grabbed my hand like this and he goes, grip it like this, right? Keep your eye on the?

• 45:04Andrew Santino?

  That's a date.

• 45:05Bobby Lee?

  No, it's not a date, dude.

• 45:07Andrew Santino?

  He showed you how to bowl?

• 45:08Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, and he goes, and then he goes, just, don't, it's not about strength. I want more accuracy.

• 45:13Andrew Santino?

  This sounds so gay.

• 45:14Bobby Lee?

  No, and I just looked at his face and he, and he smiled.

• 45:17Andrew Santino?

  That guy right there.

• 45:18Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, and I, he go, so I, he, I learned, and then I had the best score I've ever gotten.

• 45:23Andrew Santino?

  He scored, he scored well.

• 45:24Bobby Lee?

  It was me, Charles Milton and Ali Wong on one team.

• 45:27Andrew Santino?

  Mm-hmm.

• 45:27Bobby Lee?

  And then Gene, Sonny, you know, I mean, from Beef and some other people on the other team, and Charles Milton taught me how to fucking bowl.

• 45:34Andrew Santino?

  And you got a little crush?

• 45:35Bobby Lee?

  And that's in the crush, it's not, I'm not gay.

• 45:37Andrew Santino?

  You said crush to start the whole thing.

• 45:38Bobby Lee?

  I think that, but can I be honest with you? Ask me if you, you think, I think, I see if he handsome.

• 45:45Andrew Santino?

  Do you think? Couldn't even get it out.

• 45:48Bobby Lee?

  I couldn't even get it out. Ask me, yeah. Ask me if you think he handsome.

• 45:52Andrew Santino?

  Do you think Charles Milton is handsome?

• 45:53Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. And I can say that as a hetero.

• 45:57Andrew Santino?

  Okay.

• 45:58Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 45:58Andrew Santino?

  Seems like you're-

• 45:58Speaker 03

  Do you get butterflies when seeing him?

• 46:01Bobby Lee?

  It's not butterfly, you know, here's what I got excited about. Did I tell you how I got excited?

• 46:05Andrew Santino?

  Sounds like butterflies, doesn't it?

• 46:07Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 46:07Bobby Lee?

  No, you don't know what butterflies are then. You do.

• 46:10Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, I think I do. And I think you, look at that right now. Stare at that for five seconds quietly.

• 46:14Bobby Lee?

  He was, he doesn't look like that.

• 46:16Andrew Santino?

  Shh, shh, shh. Stare at that. Five, four, three, two, one. I can actually see it in your eyes. You're having like a throwback in your eyes. Alright, so you got a little crush.

• 46:29Bobby Lee?

  No, I don't have a crush, but um.

• 46:31Andrew Santino?

  It's a man crush.

• 46:32Bobby Lee?

  So I was at the bowling alley.

• 46:34Andrew Santino?

  Mm-hmm.

• 46:34Bobby Lee?

  And he comes, he has a motorcycle, right? So he has a helmet, right?

• 46:38Andrew Santino?

  Of course he does.

• 46:39Bobby Lee?

  He has like, like one of those Wolverine leather jackets, right? And he looks greasy.

• 46:42Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 46:43Bobby Lee?

  And he just came out, took the helmet off. And I looked and I couldn't recognize him already, right? But I'm like, you know, I'm like, you know. I said, "Don't, don't make the first move." "Don't, don't, don't." Like, just be cool, you know what I mean?

• 46:57Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 46:57Bobby Lee?

  So I was just kinda like looking at the-

• 46:58Andrew Santino?

  You're sounding like a girl on a date.

• 46:59Bobby Lee?

  No, no, no, I was looking at the ball, so I see him. I was right next to where the rack of the bowling. So I was like sticking my fingers in the holes to see which-

• 47:07Andrew Santino?

  Whoa.

• 47:07Bobby Lee?

  What, you think that's a thing?

• 47:09Andrew Santino?

  Mm-hmm.

• 47:09Bobby Lee?

  No, but I'm trying to find the right hole.

• 47:10Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you're, I know you are.

• 47:12Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 47:13Andrew Santino?

  I know you are.

• 47:13Bobby Lee?

  Right? And then he goes, he comes right up to me and he goes, "I'm a big fan of yours."

• 47:18Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 47:18Bobby Lee?

  And I go, "You wanna bowl?" He goes, "Eat first," so we ate first.

• 47:22Andrew Santino?

  So you had a date, you had a dinner date?

• 47:23Bobby Lee?

  No, cause Gene was there too, the one we just talked earlier.

• 47:25Andrew Santino?

  Sure.

• 47:26Bobby Lee?

  Yeah?

• 47:26Andrew Santino?

  Gene was eating with you?

• 47:27Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, us, me, Gene, and Charles. And we ate, um-

• 47:31Andrew Santino?

  Was it ever just you and Charles alone?

• 47:34Bobby Lee?

  No.

• 47:36Bobby Lee?

  No.

• 47:37Andrew Santino?

  Did you want it to be?

• 47:38Bobby Lee?

  No. You, I, you see, this is kinda bullshit I'm talking about.

• 47:41Andrew Santino?

  At the end of the night?

• 47:42Bobby Lee?

  This is the kinda bullshit I'm talking about. Take the fucker photo off of it.

• 47:45Andrew Santino?

  When he said goodbye, no, leave it up.

• 47:46Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 47:46Andrew Santino?

  At the end of the night, when he said goodbye. Did you kinda wanna hang some more?

• 47:51Bobby Lee?

  What, he's a talented guy, I wanna learn some-

• 47:53Andrew Santino?

  Did you wanna hang some more?

• 47:54Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I wanted to learn things from him.

• 47:55Andrew Santino?

  You wanted-

• 47:55Bobby Lee?

  He taught me how to bowl.

• 47:56Andrew Santino?

  You wanted to see him again? Did you exchange numbers?

• 47:59Bobby Lee?

  No, I didn't.

• 48:00Andrew Santino?

  Do you wish you did?

• 48:01Bobby Lee?

  Nope.

• 48:02Andrew Santino?

  Is this a little cry on the internet to-

• 48:04Bobby Lee?

  No, no, this is so stupid, what you're doing right now, dude, I'm not gay. It's ridiculous.

• 48:07Andrew Santino?

  It's okay.

• 48:08Bobby Lee?

  No, don't, that doesn't work, whatever you're doing.

• 48:10Andrew Santino?

  It doesn't matter.

• 48:11Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 48:11Andrew Santino?

  No one cares.

• 48:12Bobby Lee?

  Anyway, you don't have man crushes? Cause let me say something right now, I saw at the party last night, dude. I think you do.

• 48:19Andrew Santino?

  On whom?

• 48:20Bobby Lee?

  What?

• 48:20Andrew Santino?

  On whom?

• 48:21Bobby Lee?

  Chris Porter.

• 48:22Andrew Santino?

  That's our man crush. You were swinging for, you're, you're really reaching.

• 48:25Bobby Lee?

  I was reaching for it, yeah.

• 48:26Andrew Santino?

  Fitzsimmons.

• 48:27Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, you and Fitzsimmons have a little man crush, you kinda thing. I think he's a great guy.

• 48:30Andrew Santino?

  We just, we just love to, he shits on me, like the way we joke is the way you and I joke.

• 48:34Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 48:35Andrew Santino?

  He's got great-

• 48:35Bobby Lee?

  He's a great guy.

• 48:36Andrew Santino?

  Great rhythm, he'll talk really good shit. By the way, the barbecue we had last night?

• 48:40Bobby Lee?

  AJ's.

• 48:41Andrew Santino?

  So good.

• 48:41Bobby Lee?

  So good.

• 48:42Andrew Santino?

  My god, dude. That's, the one thing I, the problem I have with-

• 48:46Bobby Lee?

  Can I see?

• 48:46Andrew Santino?

  Go ahead. No, go ahead.

• 48:48Bobby Lee?

  Here's my problem.

• 48:49Andrew Santino?

  Go ahead.

• 48:50Bobby Lee?

  I'm gonna say my problem now. And what, all, I wanted to hear my problem.

• 48:54Andrew Santino?

  Say it, baby.

• 48:55Bobby Lee?

  Okay. So it's so funny because that bowling party.

• 48:58Andrew Santino?

  Mm hmm.

• 48:59Bobby Lee?

  And Bert's party, there is one common thread. And guess what the common thread is? There was something there. At both parties, and I think I know you know what it is.

• 49:11Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah.

• 49:12Bobby Lee?

  What is it?

• 49:13Andrew Santino?

  People that don't deserve to be there.

• 49:14Bobby Lee?

  No, no, no.

• 49:16Bobby Lee?

  No, it's something you consume.

• 49:17Andrew Santino?

  I'm kidding.

• 49:18Bobby Lee?

  Something you consume.

• 49:19Andrew Santino?

  Weed.

• 49:20Bobby Lee?

  No.

• 49:20Andrew Santino?

  Alcohol.

• 49:21Bobby Lee?

  It's a food.

• 49:22Andrew Santino?

  Oh, cake.

• 49:24Bobby Lee?

  Who's cake?

• 49:25Andrew Santino?

  Tom Cruise.

• 49:26Bobby Lee?

  Yes. Bingo.

• 49:28Andrew Santino?

  Tom Cruise cake.

• 49:29Bobby Lee?

  So there's a cake.

• 49:32Andrew Santino?

  Coconut.

• 49:32Bobby Lee?

  It's a coconut cake that Tom Cruise. In all the party, he gives it as gifts, apparently, and when he goes to events like weddings and whatnot. He brings his cake and apparently it's legendary.

• 49:46Andrew Santino?

  Tom Cruise cake.

• 49:47Bobby Lee?

  It's called Tom Cruise coconut cake. Okay? So, so when I went to that beef party where I saw Charles, there were six Tom Cruise cakes and they made an announcement.

• 49:57Bobby Lee?

  Tom Cruise cake. They bring that out, right? And I ate it. I'm like.

• 50:03Bobby Lee?

  Pretty good.

• 50:03Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, it's fine.

• 50:04Bobby Lee?

  But then Bert brings it out. Hey guys, you can't believe it. Like they, as if it was from Tom Cruise's asshole.

• 50:10Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 50:11Bobby Lee?

  I mean, that that's the fucking, you know, I mean, the oven.

• 50:14Andrew Santino?

  He does poop white, you know that, right?

• 50:15Bobby Lee?

  It was almost as if, and they're like, we got it. Like, it's hard to find.

• 50:19Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 50:19Bobby Lee?

  So I waited in line like everyone.

• 50:21Andrew Santino?

  Yes, you did.

• 50:21Bobby Lee?

  I was excited.

• 50:22Andrew Santino?

  You were very excited.

• 50:23Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. God, I'll get the Tom Cruise cake again. You know what I mean?

• 50:25Andrew Santino?

  But I liked the sheet cake better. The sheet cake was better. It was so good. The sheet cake.

• 50:32Bobby Lee?

  The sheet cake.

• 50:33Andrew Santino?

  The sheet cake was good. That was so.

• 50:35Bobby Lee?

  That was so good.

• 50:36Andrew Santino?

  But I.

• 50:36Bobby Lee?

  But the Tom Cruise cake is good.

• 50:38Andrew Santino?

  Sure.

• 50:38Bobby Lee?

  Right? But when you're eating it, you're like, if I, if, if I didn't know this was Tom Cruise's cake. Would I go, oh, best coconut I ever had?

• 50:48Andrew Santino?

  No.

• 50:48Bobby Lee?

  I don't think so.

• 50:49Andrew Santino?

  No, you go, this is how it tastes like coconut.

• 50:50Bobby Lee?

  It's a good coconut cake.

• 50:51Andrew Santino?

  You ever had coconut cake?

• 50:52Speaker 03

  I don't like coconut.

• 50:53Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. What if they all have like, there's a Matt Damon Danish?

• 50:57Andrew Santino?

  Oh, a Damon Danish?

• 50:58Bobby Lee?

  Right, like a Damon Danish. Or do you think everyone has one thing?

• 51:01Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, I would.

• 51:02Bobby Lee?

  I would love to have a Bobby Lee, uh, um, flan.

• 51:07Bobby Lee?

  Like at a party, people are like, we got it. Bobby Lee flan.

• 51:10Andrew Santino?

  It'd probably be. Something else.

• 51:13Bobby Lee?

  What do you mean?

• 51:13Andrew Santino?

  Flan is typically a Mexican.

• 51:15Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, but that's what makes it intriguing. A Korean dude, you know what I mean?

• 51:19Andrew Santino?

  Well, you'd be like.

• 51:20Bobby Lee?

  Also, the Tom Cruise cake isn't something that he made. He found it, the baker, and he was like, oh, this is my thing.

• 51:28Andrew Santino?

  You think that's good? Wait till you try Bobby Lee's flan.

• 51:33Bobby Lee?

  Well, they have a carrot cake there.

• 51:34Andrew Santino?

  That's mine.

• 51:35Bobby Lee?

  Last night, I ate it. It was better than the coconut cake.

• 51:38Andrew Santino?

  That's Andrew Santino's carrot cake.

• 51:40Bobby Lee?

  That is?

• 51:42Andrew Santino?

  Well.

• 51:42Bobby Lee?

  I was gonna say it was Bobby Lee's carrot cake.

• 51:44Andrew Santino?

  I'm orange.

• 51:45Bobby Lee?

  Oh, fuck.

• 51:46Andrew Santino?

  That clearly would be my cake.

• 51:47Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah? Maybe they have eleven pound cake. That could be Bobby Lee. It's yellow.

• 51:51Andrew Santino?

  Eleven pound cake.

• 51:52Bobby Lee?

  What? Lemon pound cake.

• 51:54Andrew Santino?

  Oh, lemon pound. That's you.

• 51:55Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 51:56Andrew Santino?

  I thought you said eleven pound cake. I was like, it's, that's, come on.

• 51:58Bobby Lee?

  I never said eleven pound cake.

• 52:00Andrew Santino?

  Oh, no, the eleven is the number you need to lose. The eleven pound cake. That's what it is.

• 52:04Bobby Lee?

  Okay, okay.

• 52:05Andrew Santino?

  Lemon pound cake. You're right. I'm sorry. Lemon pound cake. That's the Bobby Lee cake.

• 52:09Speaker 05

  Yeah, not eleven.

• 52:11Andrew Santino?

  You're kind of more of like a seven layer dip. That's kind of your, that's.

• 52:15Bobby Lee?

  If they have that there, then maybe I can claim.

• 52:16Andrew Santino?

  Maybe a seven layer dip cake. Okay, lemon pound cake Bobby Lee, carrot cake Andrew Santino. What's Rudy?

• 52:22Bobby Lee?

  What would you have?

• 52:24Speaker 03

  Can I be a brownie?

• 52:26Andrew Santino?

  That's actually a really good.

• 52:27Bobby Lee?

  We got Rudy Jewels's brownie, and they're like, Rudy who? No, they won't do that. I love you.

• 52:34Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you gotta take a bite. It's like.

• 52:35Bobby Lee?

  Take that. That was mean.

• 52:37Andrew Santino?

  Take a bite of the Rudy Jewels.

• 52:38Bobby Lee?

  That was so, that could be you right there. What? Obe cake.

• 52:41Andrew Santino?

  You're like blood sausage. Take a bite, and you know what it tastes like?

• 52:44Bobby Lee?

  What?

• 52:45Andrew Santino?

  A party girl in your mouth when you take a bite of that stuff.

• 52:47Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 52:48Andrew Santino?

  Mmm, a party girl in your mouth.

• 52:50Bobby Lee?

  Now, would you eat the cake if it was something that you didn't like?

• 52:53Andrew Santino?

  If it was good.

• 52:54Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. You know what I mean? Like, this is J.D. Vance. You know, croissant.

• 52:58Andrew Santino?

  If it was bomb.

• 52:59Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, maybe.

• 53:00Andrew Santino?

  Like that.

• 53:01Bobby Lee?

  What?

• 53:02Andrew Santino?

  You don't know who made that. A real grade A bigot could have made that.

• 53:06Bobby Lee?

  It's really good.

• 53:07Andrew Santino?

  Still delicious.

• 53:08Bobby Lee?

  Delete it.

• 53:08Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 53:11Andrew Santino?

  Uh-oh.

• 53:12Bobby Lee?

  Uh-oh, what's going on?

• 53:13Andrew Santino?

  Oh, he is?

• 53:15Bobby Lee?

  Come on, sit down, Dax. How are you?

• 53:18Andrew Santino?

  Hello, Dax.

• 53:19Bobby Lee?

  Dax, hello.

• 53:21Andrew Santino?

  Hi.

• 53:22Bobby Lee?

  Hi.

• 53:22Andrew Santino?

  Hello.

• 53:23Bobby Lee?

  Hello. Dax, how'd you feel last Tuesday?

• 53:27Andrew Santino?

  Uh, good. That was fun. I was nervous, but that was fun. You did such a great job.

• 53:30Bobby Lee?

  You did a great job. Did you feel like you did well?

• 53:33Andrew Santino?

  Uh, it was hard to tell because it was quite like overwhelming.

• 53:37Speaker 04

  Just like I had never done done it in front of that many people, but it was fun.

• 53:40Andrew Santino?

  You killed.

• 53:41Speaker 04

  Thank you.

• 53:42Andrew Santino?

  Can we can we see some of it?

• 53:43Bobby Lee?

  Well, before you play that, let me what's your uh, did you vote?

• 53:46Speaker 04

  Yes.

• 53:47Bobby Lee?

  Okay, uh, what's your prediction?

• 53:49Speaker 04

  Uh, that Kamala Harris will win?

• 53:52Bobby Lee?

  Uh huh.

• 53:54Speaker 04

  When will this come out? Right now?

• 53:55Andrew Santino?

  It's already over. When this comes out, it already happened.

• 53:57Speaker 04

  Okay.

• 53:58Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, so now that it's now we're in the future now, right? Trump won.

• 54:02Speaker 04

  Oh, okay.

• 54:02Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, so.

• 54:06Andrew Santino?

  But you're fine.

• 54:07Speaker 04

  Yeah.

• 54:07Andrew Santino?

  Look at that.

• 54:08Bobby Lee?

  Look at that.

• 54:08Andrew Santino?

  All right, here we go. Let's watch this tape.

• 54:10Speaker 04

  Hey, everyone. I hope you're doing awesome.

• 54:13Andrew Santino?

  Very good so far. Thank you.

• 54:16Speaker 04

  Clap your hands if you like the Bad Friends.

• 54:21Andrew Santino?

  Smart.

• 54:22Speaker 04

  I can't hear you.

• 54:25Speaker 04

  Awesome. So I love going to the aquarium. My favorite thing is always just looking at all the jellyfish. But I always just wish there was some peanut butter fish as well.

• 54:36Speaker 04

  I recently went through a breakup, not my fault, I promise. But basically she used to get headaches all the time and she'd get really mad at me because I'd be like, "Don't worry, it's only in your head." And then she'd be like, "No, I really have a headache." And I'd be like, "No, literally, it's just in your head."

• 54:56Andrew Santino?

  All right, honestly.

• 54:57Bobby Lee?

  Honestly.

• 54:58Andrew Santino?

  So you felt good?

• 54:59Speaker 04

  Uh, yeah, it was really fun.

• 55:00Bobby Lee?

  Well, the next step is take it on the road.

• 55:03Speaker 04

  Okay, yeah.

• 55:04Andrew Santino?

  Yeah. Did you get a lot of good, did you get a good response online to people hitting you up and like, saw the show, you did great?

• 55:09Speaker 04

  Yeah, yeah.

• 55:09Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 55:10Speaker 04

  Yeah, people were like, "That's awesome. You performed there because people love that place."

• 55:14Andrew Santino?

  We do.

• 55:15Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 55:15Andrew Santino?

  It is home to us.

• 55:16Bobby Lee?

  And what's, did you get some, did you get some vajayogis that night or what?

• 55:19Speaker 04

  Uh, no.

• 55:22Bobby Lee?

  Was that a yes?

• 55:23Speaker 04

  No. I just went and just filmed like an outro and then went home.

• 55:28Andrew Santino?

  Right.

• 55:28Speaker 04

  Slept.

• 55:29Bobby Lee?

  Now, your friend, unusual guy.

• 55:32Speaker 04

  Oh, he's he's nice.

• 55:33Bobby Lee?

  No, you're no nice guy. I didn't say. He's a nice guy.

• 55:37Speaker 04

  Yeah, he was very nice.

• 55:38Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I'm just saying that he was like a little like you.

• 55:41Speaker 04

  Okay, yeah.

• 55:41Speaker 05

  Yeah.

• 55:42Andrew Santino?

  Unique.

• 55:43Bobby Lee?

  Unique.

• 55:44Speaker 05

  Definitely.

• 55:44Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 55:45Andrew Santino?

  We need your help with something. So Rudy, we made a joke on the show, as we do, pretty heavily, right? And we made a joke about these girls that Rudy used to hang out with, right? And it was that, it was our fault. But then they punished her by ghosting her and becoming ex-friends because of something we joked about.

• 56:02Speaker 05

  Oh, wow.

• 56:03Andrew Santino?

  She needs help getting these friends back in her life.

• 56:06Speaker 05

  Okay.

• 56:06Andrew Santino?

  We've tried to apologize. I don't, I don't even know if we did a good job.

• 56:08Bobby Lee?

  I don't think so.

• 56:09Andrew Santino?

  But I think you can, can you offer advice to her on how to get these friends back in her life?

• 56:13Speaker 05

  Did you already look into the camera and say what you want to say to them? Like a, like not a, I guess they don't need an apology, but maybe just an explanation, right?

• 56:21Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 56:21Speaker 03

  No, I sent like a whole letter, like a long letter to them and they still never.

• 56:26Speaker 05

  Wow. Maybe, uh, they're not the right friends. Or if you do want to still be friends with them, you can just say, say it to the camera.

• 56:34Bobby Lee?

  Well, I mean, here's, here's the thing. I, I think maybe it'd be great. If you, you kind of told her what to say and then she could say it.

• 56:41Speaker 05

  Like what to text?

• 56:42Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. So why don't you look in the?

• 56:44Andrew Santino?

  Why don't you pretend like you're Rudy?

• 56:45Bobby Lee?

  You're her.

• 56:46Andrew Santino?

  And like?

• 56:46Bobby Lee?

  And, and then maybe she can just get something from the way you, you know, just rehearse it or something, you know?

• 56:50Andrew Santino?

  Why don't you look in the camera?

• 56:51Bobby Lee?

  Look in this camera and go, and go, dear friends or whatever.

• 56:54Speaker 05

  Hey, guys. What they say I'm not responsible for, I just am friends with them or whatever. And, uh, go on their podcasts every week and stuff and just, I can't be held responsible for that kind of thing. And let's just hang out.

• 57:10Andrew Santino?

  And let's ask for their friendship back.

• 57:12Speaker 05

  And can you just please come on and hang out with me?

• 57:17Andrew Santino?

  And here's why.

• 57:17Speaker 05

  And here's why. I have a lot to offer. I'm very friendly. I, we've had a lot of fun times together. And actually I might even introduce you to them sometime and y'all could discuss your differences and, uh, I'd love to have y'all on the show to hash it out.

• 57:33Andrew Santino?

  And I'll tell you what.

• 57:34Speaker 05

  And I tell you what, if you do that, you're gonna have a heck of a time. Because we maybe will go to Six Flags afterward.

• 57:44Andrew Santino?

  Or we could even.

• 57:46Bobby Lee?

  I, or we can even.

• 57:48Speaker 05

  Go, uh, to the.

• 57:50Bobby Lee?

  Holding alley or party. And I could teach.

• 57:52Andrew Santino?

  Oh, sensitive word. Yeah.

• 57:55Bobby Lee?

  Oh, or how about, listen, or I could teach you a new language like. Or I could teach you a new language, like any that you want to know that I know. And like, I'll give you an example of my. In English.

• 58:08Andrew Santino?

  But the other one.

• 58:09Bobby Lee?

  And also Spanish and. But here's a little sample. Hola. Yeah. Me llamo Rudy. Quiero tu. Yep. Quiero tu, or me gusta tu. Me gusta tu. Yeah, yeah. I like you.

• 58:27Bobby Lee?

  Y, mi amigos es mal, mal amigos.

• 58:33Bobby Lee?

  I also, I know some Japanese in it. Konichiwa. Yeah.

• 58:36Speaker 03

  Tagalog, tagalog. My language.

• 58:39Bobby Lee?

  Oh, okay. Tagalog. What is it? How do you say it?

• 58:42Speaker 03

  Tagalog?

• 58:43Bobby Lee?

  Taga, tagalog.

• 58:45Andrew Santino?

  Tagalog.

• 58:45Bobby Lee?

  Tagalog, yeah. I'll, I'll teach you that.

• 58:47Andrew Santino?

  And let's hear some of that.

• 58:51Bobby Lee?

  Just make it up.

• 58:53Andrew Santino?

  I love tagalog.

• 58:54Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, tagalog, yeah. Tagalog? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I think you will too.

• 58:58Andrew Santino?

  What does it sound like, tagalog?

• 58:59Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. Like Spanish?

• 59:03Andrew Santino?

  Let's hear some of it, dude.

• 59:04Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 59:08Bobby Lee?

  Ye hi.

• 59:14Andrew Santino?

  Ye hi.

• 59:17Andrew Santino?

  All right, that's a good letter. I mean, did you, did you grab anything from that, Rudy?

• 59:20Speaker 03

  Yeah.

• 59:21Andrew Santino?

  I mean, I feel like you learned.

• 59:22Bobby Lee?

  So I think you did it, dude. I think you really did it, dude.

• 59:26Andrew Santino?

  Dax, what, what's, what, what's going on in your personal life? You got any good news? You got any, anything coming up? Any, any, what's going on?

• 59:33Bobby Lee?

  Nothing. I'm always just kind of making videos and that's about it. Yeah. Which I like that.

• 59:38Andrew Santino?

  We love it. I watch them literally every week. Everything you put up, I watch. I really enjoy it. What do you, what's your, what's, do you have any goals in life that you're looking forward to?

• 59:47Bobby Lee?

  Um, well, I guess I enjoyed doing like stand up in front of a real crowd outside of an open mic and then. And just maybe doing more stand up and maybe just more videos.

• 1:00:02Bobby Lee?

  Continuing like maybe dating stuff and maybe.

• 1:00:05Andrew Santino?

  Oh, yeah. Are you dating anybody now?

• 1:00:07Bobby Lee?

  No, not at all.

• 1:00:09Andrew Santino?

  Not even a little bit?

• 1:00:10Bobby Lee?

  No.

• 1:00:11Andrew Santino?

  There's no prospects either?

• 1:00:12Bobby Lee?

  No, no.

• 1:00:13Andrew Santino?

  Is there a way we?

• 1:00:14Bobby Lee?

  Do you have sexual urges?

• 1:00:15Andrew Santino?

  Okay.

• 1:00:16Bobby Lee?

  Uh. Too much?

• 1:00:17Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:18Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, can I retract? Yes.

• 1:00:19Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:00:20Bobby Lee?

  And then, do you? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, okay, okay, okay, okay.

• 1:00:25Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, of course.

• 1:00:25Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 1:00:26Andrew Santino?

  Is there a way we could help facilitate maybe you meeting somebody?

• 1:00:30Bobby Lee?

  Uh, not that I know of. Why? We're good women. We're good women. Oh, maybe giving me just advice. We're good women. Oh, like going to a bar kind of? Yeah, yeah, we can go to a bar.

• 1:00:40Andrew Santino?

  We don't need to go to a bar. We can, there's a ton of places we can go. We go to a bowling alley. We could go.

• 1:00:44Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah.

• 1:00:45Andrew Santino?

  We go for a hike. We can see, we can see babes on a hike.

• 1:00:47Bobby Lee?

  And what would you do?

• 1:00:49Andrew Santino?

  To, to get women to notice you?

• 1:00:50Bobby Lee?

  If you were on a hike and saw some?

• 1:00:52Andrew Santino?

  Well, if we saw a couple of girls, we'd say, hello, do either of you know who we are? And if they said no, we would move on.

• 1:00:58Bobby Lee?

  No, no, no.

• 1:00:59Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, I'd walk right away. And if I found a new group of girls and I said, hi, do you know who we are? And they go, yes, we know Bad Friends. I said, fantastic. I'd like you to meet my.

• 1:01:06Bobby Lee?

  This is what I would do. This is what I would do on a hike. Can I just, man?

• 1:01:08Andrew Santino?

  Yeah. Here's, let me do you on a hike. Guys. Guys. Okay, go, go ahead. Go ahead.

• 1:01:21Andrew Santino?

  You see? Fuck, don't throw up on the show.

• 1:01:23Bobby Lee?

  I'm about to do it.

• 1:01:24Andrew Santino?

  Please don't.

• 1:01:24Bobby Lee?

  You almost made me do it.

• 1:01:25Andrew Santino?

  Are you gonna?

• 1:01:26Bobby Lee?

  No.

• 1:01:27Andrew Santino?

  All right.

• 1:01:28Bobby Lee?

  So anyway, um.

• 1:01:29Andrew Santino?

  You see a couple of girls?

• 1:01:30Bobby Lee?

  No, what I would do is I'd hide you off the trail.

• 1:01:32Andrew Santino?

  No, that's smart. Yeah, hiding on a trail, a hike trail. That, girls love that.

• 1:01:36Bobby Lee?

  You're not, I'm not done, dude.

• 1:01:37Andrew Santino?

  I know.

• 1:01:38Bobby Lee?

  I go up to a girl, go, oh my God, my baby just got attacked by a fucking mountain lion.

• 1:01:43Bobby Lee?

  Carlos, right?

• 1:01:43Andrew Santino?

  Smart.

• 1:01:44Bobby Lee?

  And they're like, well, yeah, yeah, the mountain lion's gone, but I, I, I, I, I can help.

• 1:01:48Andrew Santino?

  Where's the baby?

• 1:01:49Bobby Lee?

  Come over here. They follow me, right? And then you're on the ground. Right? Like, like. As if I'm your son? Yeah, you are my son. You're my baby. Okay. And your arms hurt. Okay. So do it like, yeah. I go, are you okay, baby? I need help. Yeah, but then, once you say that, I'm gone. Now it's just you and the kid.

• 1:02:10Andrew Santino?

  Now it's you and me. What happened to you, baby boy?

• 1:02:13Bobby Lee?

  Uh, just fell.

• 1:02:14Andrew Santino?

  While hiking. Oh god, does it hurt? Yeah. Do you want me to kiss it? Oh, there was a mountain lion that knocked me over. There was a mountain lion that did this to you? Yep. Yep. Are you okay? Uh, I think I need help. Well, do you want to come back to my house? And I have, I have an ice pack at my house. Yeah, for sure. You would like to do that? Mm-hmm. You would?

• 1:02:36Bobby Lee?

  Now, we're at the house.

• 1:02:37Andrew Santino?

  Hey.

• 1:02:38Bobby Lee?

  Lay down, lay down.

• 1:02:38Andrew Santino?

  Lay down, you look hurt. This is my roommate.

• 1:02:41Bobby Lee?

  Hi, I'm Sabrina.

• 1:02:43Andrew Santino?

  She sings everything.

• 1:02:44Bobby Lee?

  I sing everything.

• 1:02:46Andrew Santino?

  She has to, she has a mental.

• 1:02:47Bobby Lee?

  Anyway, I gotta go to work.

• 1:02:50Andrew Santino?

  Work? Stay with, here with this baby that I found on the trail.

• 1:02:53Bobby Lee?

  Oh, I want to give him a blowjob.

• 1:02:55Andrew Santino?

  Oh, do you want a blowjob? Uh, uh, I, I'm interested in you. Uh, or, or yeah, yeah.

• 1:03:05Bobby Lee?

  Uh, make signals.

• 1:03:07Andrew Santino?

  Wait a minute. Do you want a blowjob from me, or my roommate, or both of us?

• 1:03:13Andrew Santino?

  Uh, I don't know. Well, think about it.

• 1:03:16Bobby Lee?

  Think about it, because I gotta go to work.

• 1:03:18Andrew Santino?

  Uh, who wants two more? Oh my god.

• 1:03:21Bobby Lee?

  Oh my god.

• 1:03:23Andrew Santino?

  Me.

• 1:03:27Andrew Santino?

  Let's flip a coin? Okay.

• 1:03:29Bobby Lee?

  Okay. Heads.

• 1:03:32Andrew Santino?

  You won, give him head.

• 1:03:33Bobby Lee?

  Here we go.

• 1:03:35Andrew Santino?

  Can I watch?

• 1:03:37Bobby Lee?

  She loves to jerk off while I give blowjobs.

• 1:03:41Andrew Santino?

  Okay. Can I watch? Sure.

• 1:03:43Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 1:03:44Andrew Santino?

  Cool.

• 1:03:48Andrew Santino?

  Sorry, she has to eat a meal first before she gives you a blowjob.

• 1:03:52Bobby Lee?

  I'm eating a breakfast burrito. Let me, let me, can I finish my breakfast?

• 1:03:55Andrew Santino?

  She always eats breakfast burritos before she gives head. That's like her thing.

• 1:03:58Bobby Lee?

  Mmm, sausage.

• 1:03:59Andrew Santino?

  And the sriracha will burn on your penis that's on her lips.

• 1:04:04Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 1:04:04Andrew Santino?

  Alright, she's ready now.

• 1:04:05Bobby Lee?

  Oh wait, give me the orange juice.

• 1:04:07Andrew Santino?

  There it is. Pull out your penis, Dax.

• 1:04:13Bobby Lee?

  Mmm, vitamin C.

• 1:04:15Andrew Santino?

  You need it before you get some vitamin D.

• 1:04:17Bobby Lee?

  Alright, here I go. I do little kissies on the thighs first.

• 1:04:19Andrew Santino?

  Ooh.

• 1:04:20Bobby Lee?

  I like to announce everything I'm doing.

• 1:04:24Andrew Santino?

  Oh, man.

• 1:04:27Andrew Santino?

  What do you think, bud?

• 1:04:28Bobby Lee?

  I'm coming up, I'm coming up, I'm coming up!

• 1:04:30Andrew Santino?

  Oh, here she comes.

• 1:04:30Bobby Lee?

  I do a train.

• 1:04:36Bobby Lee?

  I'm by the little, the twin mountains.

• 1:04:39Andrew Santino?

  Uh oh, there they are.

• 1:04:40Bobby Lee?

  There they are.

• 1:04:41Andrew Santino?

  The Rockies.

• 1:04:42Bobby Lee?

  The rocky hairy mountain.

• 1:04:46Bobby Lee?

  Oh, and I'm going up the mountain, the main mountain.

• 1:04:51Andrew Santino?

  Ooh, that one's steep.

• 1:04:53Bobby Lee?

  Where there's a white snow cap.

• 1:04:55Andrew Santino?

  Oh, look at, yeah, snow cap.

• 1:04:56Bobby Lee?

  Snow cap, snow cap.

• 1:05:02Bobby Lee?

  Does it feel good? Yes, thanks. Yeah, yeah.

• 1:05:07Bobby Lee?

  If he said that, I would stop.

• 1:05:09Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you'd have to watch.

• 1:05:09Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, I think I would be watching. So, pretty good, right?

• 1:05:12Andrew Santino?

  But I guess we're gonna do that. We'll take you on a hike and we'll try to get girls that way.

• 1:05:14Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 1:05:15Andrew Santino?

  Does that sound good?

• 1:05:16Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:05:16Andrew Santino?

  Any girl that's out there, our very funny and attractive, cool friend Dax is open and available, so send him a DM. Then we'll see what you can get.

• 1:05:25Bobby Lee?

  And would I, in that scenario?

• 1:05:27Andrew Santino?

  You don't have to do any of that. You're just gonna have to talk to him like people.

• 1:05:30Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, maybe like, um, maybe not talk so much. Okay. Yeah, yeah, like, I always say yes. So, any time a girl goes, "Can I give you fellatio?" Don't hesitate.

• 1:05:43Andrew Santino?

  And they'll never say that word.

• 1:05:46Andrew Santino?

  They'll never use the word fellatio. You'll never hear that. Don't be listening for it.

• 1:05:49Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:05:49Andrew Santino?

  They'll say anything.

• 1:05:50Bobby Lee?

  Like, what if I'm English?

• 1:05:52Andrew Santino?

  Can I give you fellatio?

• 1:05:54Bobby Lee?

  Have at me! Can I give you fellatio, mate? What would they say then?

• 1:06:00Andrew Santino?

  Can I suck your cock?

• 1:06:01Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:06:02Andrew Santino?

  Can I give you a head?

• 1:06:03Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, but just don't deny it. Just go yes immediately. You know what I mean? Yeah. And then also, um...

• 1:06:09Andrew Santino?

  Anybody, really. If anybody asks. If Fancy asks, Mccone.

• 1:06:13Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, and if somebody asks you, "Does it feel good?", what'd you say? Yes. No, maybe not. Thumbs up, maybe.

• 1:06:21Andrew Santino?

  How about they say, "Oh, yeah"?

• 1:06:22Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah, oh, yeah, say that.

• 1:06:23Andrew Santino?

  Ready? "Does that feel good?"

• 1:06:25Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:06:28Bobby Lee?

  Honestly, dude, that's not...

• 1:06:29Andrew Santino?

  We gotta try it again.

• 1:06:30Bobby Lee?

  You gotta do it again. Be real, dude.

• 1:06:31Andrew Santino?

  Hey, "Does that feel good?"

• 1:06:33Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah. No.

• 1:06:35Andrew Santino?

  No, you can't laugh at her.

• 1:06:36Bobby Lee?

  They're like, "Oh, yeah." That's how you would say it? Yeah, "Oh, yeah."

• 1:06:40Andrew Santino?

  Like the Kool-Aid man.

• 1:06:41Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, that's right, Kool-Aid man.

• 1:06:42Andrew Santino?

  Okay, here we go. Ready? "Oh, yeah. Does that feel good, Dax?"

• 1:06:46Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah. That better.

• 1:06:51Andrew Santino?

  Do you like how that feels?

• 1:06:53Bobby Lee?

  Mm-hmm.

• 1:06:56Bobby Lee?

  You're shy, huh? Yeah. Yeah.

• 1:06:59Andrew Santino?

  And you know what they love? You know what they love when they're... Pat them on the head. So say, "Oh yeah," and then pat them... pat her on the head. Does that feel good?

• 1:07:05Bobby Lee?

  Pat the head. Oh, yeah.

• 1:07:10Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. I'm interested to see, I mean...

• 1:07:12Andrew Santino?

  I love you, Dax.

• 1:07:13Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is Dax a... Fucking best. Does Dax make a noise, you think?

• 1:07:17Andrew Santino?

  What? Fuck noises?

• 1:07:18Bobby Lee?

  No, like a cum noise.

• 1:07:19Andrew Santino?

  No, ask him.

• 1:07:21Bobby Lee?

  Do you make cum noises? I don't know. Yeah, yeah. You don't know? Yeah. Yeah, okay, good.

• 1:07:27Andrew Santino?

  Bob does. Tell him.

• 1:07:30Bobby Lee?

  What do you tell him what?

• 1:07:31Andrew Santino?

  Your noise.

• 1:07:33Bobby Lee?

  What do you mean?

• 1:07:33Andrew Santino?

  Do your noise for him. Make him feel comfortable.

• 1:07:40Andrew Santino?

  Is that really it?

• 1:07:42Bobby Lee?

  Not really, no. You want me to be real?

• 1:07:44Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:07:51Bobby Lee?

  Don't laugh. Dude, I swear to... Hey, dude. Hey, dude. Stop fucking around right now, dude.

• 1:07:57Andrew Santino?

  Okay. It's really... He's a serious...

• 1:07:59Bobby Lee?

  I'm being intimate right now, and I'm being real.

• 1:08:01Andrew Santino?

  He is.

• 1:08:02Bobby Lee?

  And you're laughing at my soul.

• 1:08:03Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, you're cackling at him.

• 1:08:04Bobby Lee?

  You're cackling at me. Okay. Okay. So just look at me.

• 1:08:09Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:08:12Bobby Lee?

  So you're doing it again, dude. You're smiling. You're Dax.

• 1:08:14Andrew Santino?

  Dax, you gotta watch him.

• 1:08:15Bobby Lee?

  You gotta look at me, dude.

• 1:08:22Andrew Santino?

  Dax, it's Dax.

• 1:08:23Bobby Lee?

  Dax, Dax.

• 1:08:24Andrew Santino?

  You're on a date.

• 1:08:25Bobby Lee?

  You do it. You do it.

• 1:08:26Andrew Santino?

  No, I think...

• 1:08:26Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I think you should. You're great.

• 1:08:27Andrew Santino?

  You gotta finish with...

• 1:08:28Bobby Lee?

  His acting is much better. So go ahead. Go ahead. Yeah, yeah. Look at him.

• 1:08:39Andrew Santino?

  Don't look away.

• 1:08:40Bobby Lee?

  Don't... Yeah, don't look away, dude.

• 1:08:46Andrew Santino?

  Dax.

• 1:08:46Bobby Lee?

  Dax.

• 1:08:47Andrew Santino?

  You're ruining the moment, man.

• 1:08:48Bobby Lee?

  Anyway, we love you so much, bud.

• 1:08:50Andrew Santino?

  You're the greatest.

• 1:08:51Bobby Lee?

  And when we do dates on the... in the States, we're gonna probably bring you on...

• 1:08:54Andrew Santino?

  Hundred percent.

• 1:08:55Bobby Lee?

  Some of these shows.

• 1:08:55Andrew Santino?

  And we should do a Dax dating show.

• 1:08:58Bobby Lee?

  I think we should, yeah, yeah.

• 1:08:59Andrew Santino?

  Would you like that, or no?

• 1:09:00Bobby Lee?

  Uh, I could... Step out of my comfort zone and try it.

• 1:09:03Andrew Santino?

  I would love that.

• 1:09:04Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, I'd love to.

• 1:09:05Andrew Santino?

  Cause I wanna find you. Here, of all the jokes we make on this show.

• 1:09:09Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:09:09Andrew Santino?

  I do would love to find you love, cause you're a rad dude. I think you deserve somebody fucking cool. You're so fucking sweet and cool.

• 1:09:16Bobby Lee?

  You're a sweet guy.

• 1:09:17Andrew Santino?

  Can we, I would love to find someone for you if you'll let us help. If you don't want our help, fine. Say fuck you guys. Say that right now. Say fuck you guys.

• 1:09:24Bobby Lee?

  I would accept your help.

• 1:09:25Andrew Santino?

  Okay, great. I think we should do it.

• 1:09:27Bobby Lee?

  I think we should do it.

• 1:09:27Andrew Santino?

  We'll do a Dax dating show. And by the way, if there's girls out there right now that are like, I would love to be at least on a Zoom. To, you know, to hit up Carlos in the booth at gmail dot com. That's gonna get you, uh, submittals. I think we should take some mittles right now. Carlos in the booth at gmail dot com. Girls that wanna be on the Dax dating show, we'll have them back. We'll zoom you in. Uh, we'll zoom me in. We'll zoom me in, or if you live in Southern California, maybe. We'll link you guys up somehow. And then the winner, we're gonna send to a very nice dinner date. That we'll pay for. We'll pay for a dinner. We'll pay for a night in a hotel, whether you use it or not. Okay, we'll pay for a car service. We, you know what we'll do? We'll even get you a tux.

• 1:10:04Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 1:10:05Andrew Santino?

  We'll get you all dressed up for the date. Does that sound good?

• 1:10:07Bobby Lee?

  Oh, yeah.

• 1:10:08Andrew Santino?

  I think it's a good idea.

• 1:10:09Bobby Lee?

  Tux seems like a weird first date thing.

• 1:10:11Andrew Santino?

  No, that's what all the cool guys do.

• 1:10:12Bobby Lee?

  All the cool guys do it.

• 1:10:13Andrew Santino?

  That's what every cool guy does.

• 1:10:14Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. Uh, you think we're cool? We do it?

• 1:10:16Andrew Santino?

  We tux.

• 1:10:17Bobby Lee?

  We tux it up.

• 1:10:18Andrew Santino?

  We gotta tux. What would be more impressive, Rudy, when a guy shows up on a first date than a tux? I mean.

• 1:10:24Speaker 03

  Normal clothes?

• 1:10:26Andrew Santino?

  Well, for you, but you're not right for.

• 1:10:28Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, you're not right.

• 1:10:28Andrew Santino?

  That's the point.

• 1:10:29Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, you're basic. In a good way.

• 1:10:31Andrew Santino?

  Every first date I've ever been on, I tuxed up.

• 1:10:34Bobby Lee?

  When you say car service, do you mean limo? Yeah, what do we think we mean?

• 1:10:39Andrew Santino?

  Now, when you say limo, what do you mean?

• 1:10:40Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, what do you mean?

• 1:10:43Andrew Santino?

  Do you mean like a stretch limousine?

• 1:10:44Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. When we see, when we say limo, we mean white van.

• 1:10:48Andrew Santino?

  Yeah.

• 1:10:48Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. That's what we mean. Okay.

• 1:10:51Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, like a windowless van.

• 1:10:52Bobby Lee?

  A windowless van.

• 1:10:53Andrew Santino?

  Now, when you say limo, do you think people still get stretch limousines around town?

• 1:10:59Andrew Santino?

  I guess not really, but They don't. Okay. Yeah, no one does. Yeah. They haven't made them in 36 years, but I do think we'll get you a town car. Okay. How about that? Is that one of the like black SUVs? A town car is just a black sedan. Okay. But how about this? Do you want us to get you a limo service for the night? A stretch?

• 1:11:18Andrew Santino?

  I'll get you a fucking stretch limousine.

• 1:11:20Speaker 04

  A prom, prom.

• 1:11:22Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, a prom one. I don't specifically. No, it sounds like you want one. He was a little demanding. He did say, "Do I get a limo?" So that's what you want? The white, long one?

• 1:11:30Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. Oh, the black one.

• 1:11:31Andrew Santino?

  What do you like? Long, black limo or long, white?

• 1:11:33Bobby Lee?

  Or we can do like a penguin thing where it's like purple. Are you back? You know what? It would be great if we dressed you like the penguin. Like the the cartoon version with the, with the top hat, black tuxedo.

• 1:11:46Andrew Santino?

  You mean Cobblepot?

• 1:11:47Bobby Lee?

  Cobblepot, Cobblepot, purple, right? We could be minions or, you know?

• 1:11:52Andrew Santino?

  Love to.

• 1:11:53Bobby Lee?

  We'd love to do a minion thing.

• 1:11:54Andrew Santino?

  Can we be involved?

• 1:11:56Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. Will we open the door for you and your date? You know what I mean? We have, you know? I could be Harley Quinn. I don't know.

• 1:12:03Andrew Santino?

  So.

• 1:12:04Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, who do you think? Poison Ivy?

• 1:12:07Andrew Santino?

  Poison Ivy.

• 1:12:08Bobby Lee?

  You, I think.

• 1:12:09Andrew Santino?

  I'll be Catwoman.

• 1:12:09Bobby Lee?

  Sandman.

• 1:12:10Andrew Santino?

  Sandman, yeah.

• 1:12:10Bobby Lee?

  Sandman, that's not even in the thing. No, yeah.

• 1:12:12Andrew Santino?

  Doesn't matter.

• 1:12:13Bobby Lee?

  You know, I need to know.

• 1:12:14Andrew Santino?

  I'll be the Riddler.

• 1:12:16Bobby Lee?

  Okay.

• 1:12:17Andrew Santino?

  No, you know what? I'll be Mr. Freeze.

• 1:12:18Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, be Mr. Freeze. Perfect.

• 1:12:20Andrew Santino?

  I'll be Mr. Freeze. Well, this sounds good. Does this sound good to you?

• 1:12:23Bobby Lee?

  Mm-hmm. Jules, you can be Bane.

• 1:12:27Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:12:28Andrew Santino?

  Perfect.

• 1:12:28Bobby Lee?

  You're perfect.

• 1:12:29Andrew Santino?

  Well, let's wrap up the show the right way, Dax. If you have one, and I think you do, can you end the show with a joke on camera? A new joke that you've got? A new one? Yeah. You can do an old one. Can I pull out my phone? A hundred percent. Yeah. I'd rather you do that. I mean, I don't expect you to memorize all that stuff. But I'd love you to end the show with a new joke. I've been getting fast.

• 1:12:50Speaker 05

  Food too much lately.

• 1:12:51Bobby Lee?

  You know what, I could stop for a second. I'm so sorry. I love your jokes, right? But I think a better exercise is to just come up with something improvised.

• 1:12:57Speaker 05

  Okay.

• 1:12:57Bobby Lee?

  We give you a topic.

• 1:12:58Andrew Santino?

  Can I hear the premise though, at least? I was actually interested.

• 1:13:00Bobby Lee?

  Okay, go ahead.

• 1:13:01Andrew Santino?

  Go ahead.

• 1:13:02Speaker 05

  Oh, okay. So whenever I go through fast food places, they're always like, uh, thanks so much, you know, enjoy your meal. And then I say, you too, but I'm the one eating the meal, not them.

• 1:13:12Bobby Lee?

  It's a, it's a Brian Regan joke.

• 1:13:14Andrew Santino?

  Uh huh.

• 1:13:14Speaker 05

  Oh, I didn't know it was existed already. I didn't mean to.

• 1:13:16Bobby Lee?

  It does, yeah.

• 1:13:17Andrew Santino?

  Let's twerk it. Let's twerk it. How about this? How about this?

• 1:13:19Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:13:20Andrew Santino?

  Whenever I go to fast food restaurants, a lot of times on the drive through, they'll say, enjoy your meal. You know how hard it is for me to tell them, it's, you know, hard it is for me to not tell them to go fuck themselves?

• 1:13:32Bobby Lee?

  I think it's something.

• 1:13:32Andrew Santino?

  Let's hear that. Let's hear.

• 1:13:33Bobby Lee?

  Okay, I have one.

• 1:13:34Andrew Santino?

  Let's hear, let's hear you say that. Ready?

• 1:13:36Speaker 05

  Uh, I've been getting a fast food a lot lately and every time I go through, they say, enjoy your meal. You know how hard it is for me to not tell them to fuck themselves?

• 1:13:45Andrew Santino?

  Perfect.

• 1:13:45Bobby Lee?

  Or something arbitrary.

• 1:13:47Andrew Santino?

  Yeah, that's.

• 1:13:47Bobby Lee?

  I think it's something arbitrary and weird because he's a weird guy, right? So it's like, um, enjoy your meal, he's, they say, and you go, Alioop, go pro.

• 1:13:54Andrew Santino?

  Alioop, go pro, all the way.

• 1:13:56Bobby Lee?

  All the way. Alioop, go pro all the way. So try that.

• 1:13:59Speaker 05

  And the joke is that it's like just a funny, random thing.

• 1:14:02Andrew Santino?

  No, it'll make sense when you say it.

• 1:14:03Bobby Lee?

  Makes sense when you say it. Yeah, yeah.

• 1:14:05Speaker 05

  I've been getting fast food way too much lately.

• 1:14:06Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:14:07Speaker 05

  Every time I go, they're like, enjoy your meal. And I say, Alioop, go pro all the way.

• 1:14:13Andrew Santino?

  Beep, beep, beep.

• 1:14:14Speaker 05

  Beep, beep.

• 1:14:14Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:14:16Bobby Lee?

  Do it again with the beep beep. Again, thank you. And do it, try to do the best English accent you can.

• 1:14:22Andrew Santino?

  Alioop, go pro all the way. Beep beep. It's gotta be British.

• 1:14:24Bobby Lee?

  It's gotta be British. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

• 1:14:26Speaker 05

  I've been getting fast food way too much lately. Every time I go through the drive through though, they're like, enjoy your meal. And I say, Alioop, go pro all the way. Beep beep.

• 1:14:36Andrew Santino?

  And we wrote a joke.

• 1:14:37Bobby Lee?

  We just wrote a joke.

• 1:14:38Andrew Santino?

  And that's very good.

• 1:14:38Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, it's very good.

• 1:14:39Andrew Santino?

  All right, let's hear the other one that's not a premise.

• 1:14:41Speaker 05

  Oh, that was the one that was not a premise.

• 1:14:43Andrew Santino?

  Oh. No, that was my fault.

• 1:14:46Speaker 05

  Premise would be like, uh, like, I think my phone is listening to me and then.

• 1:14:50Andrew Santino?

  Something funny or like something about red flags or or some something or So I think my phone is listening to me.

• 1:14:58Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:14:58Andrew Santino?

  And from what I know, they're made in China.

• 1:15:00Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:15:01Andrew Santino?

  So I know they can't see me.

• 1:15:05Andrew Santino?

  And what does that mean? If these phones are really made in China. How come the front facing camera lens is very round?

• 1:15:13Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. That's very good. I know. I see where you're going. Right.

• 1:15:17Andrew Santino?

  Correct. Yeah.

• 1:15:18Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. And

• 1:15:18Andrew Santino?

  We're riffing here, by the way.

• 1:15:20Bobby Lee?

  Yeah, we're we're just riffing, right?

• 1:15:21Andrew Santino?

  Right. I think my phone is listening to me. Boy, I hope it doesn't. I hope it doesn't hear me. When I'm.

• 1:15:31Andrew Santino?

  When I'm what?

• 1:15:32Speaker 03

  Fucking myself.

• 1:15:33Andrew Santino?

  Fucking myself. Let's hear you say that.

• 1:15:35Bobby Lee?

  Yeah.

• 1:15:37Andrew Santino?

  I I think my phone is listening to me. I hope it doesn't hear me when I'm fucking myself. Yeah, it doesn't sound right.

• 1:15:43Bobby Lee?

  It doesn't sound right because I think you're rushing the punch.

• 1:15:45Andrew Santino?

  You're rushing the punch.

• 1:15:45Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. And um.

• 1:15:47Andrew Santino?

  How about this? You know, I think my phone is listening to me. Thank God it's not watching me. Because when I'm looking at it, I'm usually jerking on my ding dong. Can you say that?

• 1:15:56Bobby Lee?

  Beep beep.

• 1:15:57Andrew Santino?

  Beep beep.

• 1:15:58Bobby Lee?

  The beep beep has to be there. Yeah.

• 1:16:01Andrew Santino?

  It's gotta be.

• 1:16:01Bobby Lee?

  It's gotta be there.

• 1:16:02Andrew Santino?

  I think my phone is listening to me. Thank God it's not watching me because when I'm looking at it, I'm usually jerking on my ding dong. Beep beep. Every time I'm looking at my phone. I think my phone's listening to me. Okay. I I think my phone's listening to me. Wait, I think my phone's listening to me. Thanks. Thank God it's not watching me. I think my phone's listening to me. Thank God it's not watching me because every time I'm looking at it, I'm usually just look jacking off. Jerking on my ding dong. Beep beep.

• 1:16:32Bobby Lee?

  Exactly. That was perfect.

• 1:16:33Andrew Santino?

  Perfect, dude.

• 1:16:34Bobby Lee?

  It's perfect, dude.

• 1:16:34Andrew Santino?

  I think we got a new joke.

• 1:16:35Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. So write that down.

• 1:16:36Andrew Santino?

  Every time I'm looking at it, I'm jerking off my ding dong. Beep beep. Yeah. By the way.

• 1:16:42Bobby Lee?

  Out of you. Go all the way. Beep beep. Remember that.

• 1:16:45Andrew Santino?

  If you do a series of jokes that end with beep beep, it will fucking

• 1:16:48Bobby Lee?

  Yeah. Beep beep is your is your

• 1:16:50Andrew Santino?

  That's your calling. Like a catchphrase?

• 1:16:52Bobby Lee?

  It's a catchphrase. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Beep beep is your catch. Yeah.

• 1:16:54Andrew Santino?

  Well, Dex, will you look in that camera and say, thanks for being a bad friend? Thanks for being a bad friend.

• 1:16:58Bobby Lee?

  Right.

• 1:16:59Andrew Santino?

  Love you, dude.

• 1:17:05Speaker 06

  Yeah Woo

• 1:17:09Speaker 06

  Yeah Woo

• 1:17:14Speaker 06

  Yeah Woo

• 1:17:19Speaker 06

  Yeah